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merriammusicinc · 4 years

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21 Classic Piano Quotes That Will Inspire You to Play

The piano is a classic instrument that has been idolized for centuries. Check out these piano quotes that will inspire you to sit down and play a melody.

It doesn't matter whether you've been dreaming about learning how to play the piano or have been playing for decades. Sometimes, you just need a little push to get your fingers in gear.

Playing the piano can be a relaxing and rejuvenating artform that benefits not only the audience but the performer as well. But, as fun as playing a well-known piece can be, practicing is another matter entirely.

While no one ever really wants to sit down and practice -- it's the only way to improve and maintain your musical abilities. So, when it comes time to hit the bench and get to work, you may find yourself looking for a little bit of inspiration.

The famous old saying, "the pen is mightier than the sword," couldn't be truer. Words are powerful tools that, in times of strife, can provide the inspiration we need to pick ourselves up and get back to work.

Finding strength in words can also help you when you're trying to get yourself in the right headspace to practice.

Fortunately, there have been plenty of piano loving composers, musicians, and other artists who came before us.

These pianists imparted words of wisdom that can help any student find the inspiration you need to get playing.

Are you looking for a little musical guidance?

Here are 21 of the greatest quotes about the piano ever imparted, that are sure to make you want to get to tickling those ivory keys in no time.

Quotes About the Piano

1. "The piano ain't got no wrong notes."

-- Thelonious Monk, American Jazz Pianist, and Composer

2. “The important thing is to feel your music, really feel it and believe it.”

-- Ray Charles

3. "There's nothing remarkable about it. All one has to do is hit the right keys at the right time and the instrument plays itself."

– Johann Sebastian Bach

4. "The piano is able to communicate the subtlest universal truths by means of wood, metal and vibrating air."

-- Kenneth Miller, American Biologist

5. “Life is like a piano. What you get out of it depends on how you play it.”

--Tom Lehrer

6. “The piano keys are black and white but they sound like a million colors in your mind.”

-- Maria Cristina Mena, Author

7. "Life is like a piano; the white keys represent happiness and the black show sadness. But as you go through life’s journey, remember that the black keys also create music"

-- Ehssan

8. “What has keys but can’t listen to the beauty it unlocks? A piano.”

-- Jarod Kintz

9. "Color is the keyboard, the eyes are the harmonies, the soul is the piano with many strings. The artist is the hand that plays, touching one key or another, to cause vibrations in the soul."

-- Wassily Kandinsky, Russian Painter

10. "The piano as a medium for expression is a whole world by itself. No other instrument can fill or replace its own say in the world of emotion, sentiment, poetry, imagery, and fancy."

-- Leopold Godowsky, Polish-American Pianist

11. "Prayer is when you talk to God. Meditation is when you're listening. Playing the piano allows you to do both at the same time."

-- Kelsey Grammer, American Actor

12. "When you play, never mind who listens to you."

-- Robert Schumann, German Composer

13. "I believe in using the entire piano as a single instrument capable of expressing every possible musical idea."

-- Oscar Peterson, Canadian Jazz Pianist

14. "I had never before thought of how awful the relationship must be between the musician and his instrument. He has to fill it, this instrument, with the breath of life, his own. He has to make it do what he wants it to do.And a piano is just a piano. It's made out of so much wood and wires and little hammers and big ones, and ivory. While there's only so much you can do with it, the only way to find this out is to try; to try and make it do everything."

-- James Baldwin, American Author

15. "I tell my piano the things I used to tell you."

-- Frederic Chopin, Polish Composer, and Pianist

16. "To me, the piano in itself is an orchestra."

-- Cecil Taylor, American Pianist, and Poe

17. "Pianos, unlike people, sing when you give them your every growl. They know how to dive into the pit of your stomach and harmonize with your roars when you've split yourself open. And when they see you, guts shining, brain pulsing, heart right there exposed in a rhythm that beats need-need, need-need, need-need, pianos do not run. And so she plays."

-- Francesca Lia Block, American Author

18. "I'm an interpreter of stories. When I perform it's like sitting down at my piano and telling fairy tales."

-- Nat King Cole, American Jazz Musician

19. "One of my biggest thrills for me still is sitting down with a guitar or a piano and just out of nowhere trying to make a song happen."

-- Sir Paul McCartney, English Singer-Songwriter

20. "I'm able to sometimes express things even more articulately on the piano than I am with singing."

-- Harry Connick Jr., American Musician

21. "Sometimes I feel like a melody doesn't have anything to do with me, but it's just something that comes, is accumulated from me playing on the piano, and then this little creature just appears."

-- Agnes Obel, Danish Singer-Songwriter

Despite what some non-piano-playing-musicians might try to tell you -- the piano is one of the most difficult musical instruments to master.

No other instrument has 88 different buttons. So, as a pianist, budding or otherwise, you should take pride in your instrument and play it as often as you possibly can.

It can be difficult, at times, to find the inspiration you need to practice every day. Running through those tedious finger exercises and boring practice pieces can be the bane of any pianist's existence.

But, these powerful quotes about the piano from your fellow pianists and music lovers will help you find the inner strength you need to succeed.

And who knows? Given enough practice and time, one-day future budding pianists could be turning to inspirational quotes and motivational quotes from you for you to sit down and play.

It doesn't matter whether you're a seasoned pro or just learning how to plunk out "Chopsticks" for the very first time. If you're trying to master the piano, we have everything you need.

We offer instruments and sheet music, tuning and care, and even lessons with passionate and talented piano instructors. You won't need to look anywhere else for the tools you may need to further your musical career and music life.

Visit us or contact us today for more information or to get started on your path to musical success.

The post 21 Classic Piano Quotes That Will Inspire You to Play first appeared on Merriam Pianos

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#black and white #favorite piano quotes #inspirational piano quotes #jarod kintz #johann sebastian bach #ludwig van beethoven #maria cristina mena #music piano quotes #motivational quotes

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adambstingus · 6 years

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21 Quotes About Wine That Perfectly Explain Your Need To Have A Glass At The End Of Each Day

1. I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food. W.C. Fields

2. Either give me more wine or leave me alone. Rumi

3. Accept what life offers you and try to drink from every cup. All wines should be tasted; some should only be sipped, but with others, drink the whole bottle. Paulo Coelho

4. One should always be drunk. That’s all that matters…But with what? With wine, with poetry, or with virtue, as you chose. But get drunk. Charles Baudelaire

5. his lips drink water but his heart drinks wine E.E. Cummings

6. Wine is one of the most civilized things in the world and one of the most natural things of the world that has been brought to the greatest perfection, and it offers a greater range for enjoyment and appreciation than, possibly, any other purely sensory thing. Ernest Hemingway

7. At church, during communion, they give out free wine. Whoa! Talk about a great place to drink and meet women. Jarod Kintz

8. If reassurances could dull pain, nobody would ever go to the trouble of pressing grapes. Scott Lynch

9. A raisin on the ground is full of hope that if it just keeps aging, it will turn into wine and get drunk on its wrinkly self. Jarod Kintz

10. Wine is the most healthful and most hygienic of beverages. Louis Pasteur

11. Beer is made by men, wine by God. Martin Luther

12. What wine goes with Captain Crunch? George Carlin

13. Give me wine to wash me clean of the weather-stains of cares Ralph Waldo Emerson

14. Wine makes all things possible. George R.R. Martin

15. A bottle of wine begs to be shared; I have never met a miserly wine lover Clifton Fadiman

16. Wine makes every meal an occasion, every table more elegant, every day more civilized. Andre Simon

17. The first kiss and the first glass of wine are the best. Marty Rubin

18. My love is like an empty bottle of wine. If youre wondering, my ex wife drank it all. Jarod Kintz

19. …wine [is] a constant proof that God loves us, and loves to see us happy. Benjamin Franklin

20. WINE! Because these problems arent going to forget THEMSELVES! Tanya Masse

21. Wine is to women as duct tape is to men, it fixes EVERYTHING! Tanya Masse

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/21-quotes-about-wine-that-perfectly-explain-your-need-to-have-a-glass-at-the-end-of-each-day/ from All of Beer https://allofbeercom.tumblr.com/post/177355765777

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samanthasroberts · 6 years

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21 Quotes About Wine That Perfectly Explain Your Need To Have A Glass At The End Of Each Day

1. I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food. W.C. Fields

2. Either give me more wine or leave me alone. Rumi

3. Accept what life offers you and try to drink from every cup. All wines should be tasted; some should only be sipped, but with others, drink the whole bottle. Paulo Coelho

4. One should always be drunk. That’s all that matters…But with what? With wine, with poetry, or with virtue, as you chose. But get drunk. Charles Baudelaire

5. his lips drink water but his heart drinks wine E.E. Cummings

7. At church, during communion, they give out free wine. Whoa! Talk about a great place to drink and meet women. Jarod Kintz

8. If reassurances could dull pain, nobody would ever go to the trouble of pressing grapes. Scott Lynch

9. A raisin on the ground is full of hope that if it just keeps aging, it will turn into wine and get drunk on its wrinkly self. Jarod Kintz

10. Wine is the most healthful and most hygienic of beverages. Louis Pasteur

11. Beer is made by men, wine by God. Martin Luther

12. What wine goes with Captain Crunch? George Carlin

13. Give me wine to wash me clean of the weather-stains of cares Ralph Waldo Emerson

14. Wine makes all things possible. George R.R. Martin

15. A bottle of wine begs to be shared; I have never met a miserly wine lover Clifton Fadiman

16. Wine makes every meal an occasion, every table more elegant, every day more civilized. Andre Simon

17. The first kiss and the first glass of wine are the best. Marty Rubin

18. My love is like an empty bottle of wine. If youre wondering, my ex wife drank it all. Jarod Kintz

19. …wine [is] a constant proof that God loves us, and loves to see us happy. Benjamin Franklin

20. WINE! Because these problems arent going to forget THEMSELVES! Tanya Masse

21. Wine is to women as duct tape is to men, it fixes EVERYTHING! Tanya Masse

Source: http://allofbeer.com/21-quotes-about-wine-that-perfectly-explain-your-need-to-have-a-glass-at-the-end-of-each-day/

from All of Beer https://allofbeer.wordpress.com/2018/08/24/21-quotes-about-wine-that-perfectly-explain-your-need-to-have-a-glass-at-the-end-of-each-day/

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allofbeercom · 6 years

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21 Quotes About Wine That Perfectly Explain Your Need To Have A Glass At The End Of Each Day

1. I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food. W.C. Fields

2. Either give me more wine or leave me alone. Rumi

3. Accept what life offers you and try to drink from every cup. All wines should be tasted; some should only be sipped, but with others, drink the whole bottle. Paulo Coelho

4. One should always be drunk. That’s all that matters…But with what? With wine, with poetry, or with virtue, as you chose. But get drunk. Charles Baudelaire

5. his lips drink water but his heart drinks wine E.E. Cummings

7. At church, during communion, they give out free wine. Whoa! Talk about a great place to drink and meet women. Jarod Kintz

8. If reassurances could dull pain, nobody would ever go to the trouble of pressing grapes. Scott Lynch

9. A raisin on the ground is full of hope that if it just keeps aging, it will turn into wine and get drunk on its wrinkly self. Jarod Kintz

10. Wine is the most healthful and most hygienic of beverages. Louis Pasteur

11. Beer is made by men, wine by God. Martin Luther

12. What wine goes with Captain Crunch? George Carlin

13. Give me wine to wash me clean of the weather-stains of cares Ralph Waldo Emerson

14. Wine makes all things possible. George R.R. Martin

15. A bottle of wine begs to be shared; I have never met a miserly wine lover Clifton Fadiman

16. Wine makes every meal an occasion, every table more elegant, every day more civilized. Andre Simon

17. The first kiss and the first glass of wine are the best. Marty Rubin

18. My love is like an empty bottle of wine. If youre wondering, my ex wife drank it all. Jarod Kintz

19. …wine [is] a constant proof that God loves us, and loves to see us happy. Benjamin Franklin

20. WINE! Because these problems arent going to forget THEMSELVES! Tanya Masse

21. Wine is to women as duct tape is to men, it fixes EVERYTHING! Tanya Masse

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/21-quotes-about-wine-that-perfectly-explain-your-need-to-have-a-glass-at-the-end-of-each-day/

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brittanyyoungblog · 6 years

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It’s Over Quotes: 61 Breakup Quotes to Say Goodbye

It’s hard to say goodbye—we already know that based on television, movies, and personal experiences. There are songs explicitly created to detail the difficulty in saying goodbye to someone, especially regarding a breakup.

Oftentimes, it’s hard to say goodbye because the actual words are harsh and unsettling. Many people would rather not say “it’s over” to someone we loved or once loved. Then there are other times, when you’re upset or hurt, that you’d like to shout it’s over from the rooftops. When you’re not sure how you feel or how to express yourself, finding the right words can help you move through it. That’s why we’ve put together this list of it’s over quotes and breakup quotes to help you say goodbye.

Here are a few ways for you to say that it’s over, to yourself or someone else:

Wise words from children’s literature. Characters from children’s literature may not seem like the most obvious place to go to for advice on saying goodbey, but when you look deeper, you”ll see that they are. To say goodbye in a way that tugs on the heartstrings, look to some of these breakup quotes.

“How lucky am I to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard?” A.A. Milne, Winnie the Pooh

“Goodbye always makes my throat hurt.” Charles Schulz, Charlie Brown

“Someone always leaves.” Charles Schulz, Charlie Brown

“You said you’d always be there for me, but you’re not.” The Lion King

“I’ll remember you, though. I remember everyone that leaves.” Lilo and Stitch

“Goodbye may seem forever, farewell is like the end. But my heart is a memory and there you’ll always be.” The Fox and the Hound

Famous people and famous quotes. Famous quotes are well-known for a reason. If you’re writing a letter or a card and want to look to the wise words that have been passed down through the ages, here are some great options.

“If you’re brave enough to say goodbye, life will reward you with a new hello.” Paulo Coehlo

“So for now I say goodbye to this chapter of my life and I look forward to what comes next.” Brooke Davis

“It’s time to say goodbye, but I think goodbyes are sad and I’d much rather say hello. Hello to a new adventure.” Ernie Harwell

“Saying goodbye doesn’t mean anything. It’s the time we spent together that matters, not how we left it.” Trey Parker

“The story of life is quicker than the blink of an eye, the story of love is hello, goodbye.” Jimi Hendrix

“It feels right, but it’s emotional. Saying goodbye to anything you’ve done that long is hard.” Angela Ruggiero

“Could we see when and where we are to meet again, we would be more tender when we bid our friends goodbye.” Ouida

“I’ve become more comfortable as time has gone on with saying goodbye because I’ve been having so many conversations about the cyclical nature of life. It just keeps going.” Brie Larson

“History never really says goodbye. History says see you later.” Eduardo Galeano

“We only part to meet again.” John Gay

“Where is the good in goodbye?” Meredith Wilson

“There are no goodbyes for us. Wherever you are, you will always be in my heart.” Mahatma Gandhi

“It’s the emptiest, and yet the fullest of all human messages: Good-bye.” Kurt Vonnegut

“This is not a goodbye, my darling, this is a thank you.” Nicholas Sparks

“Farewell is a beautiful and a soft word and yet it is a horrible and heavy thing too!” Mehmet Ildan

“I find wisdom in the waves. Goodbye is a hello to a life without you.” Jarod Kintz

“Bless those who walk away from you, they are making room for those who won’t.” Unknown

“One kind kiss before we part, drop a tear, and bid adieu.” Robert Dodsley

“Goodbye is the last time I will hold you near.” Celine Dion

“You can only lose what you cling to.” Buddha

“In the process of letting go, you will lose many things from the past, but you will find yourself.” Deepak Chopra

Speak from the heart. There are some phrases and quotes that will apply more than others. Lean on these to help you project and heal.

“Someday you’ll see the reason why, there’s good in goodbye.”

“Every goodbye always makes the next hello closer.”

“There are no goodbyes for us. Wherever you are, you will always be in my heart.”

“Thank you for being a part of my life.”

“You will always be a part of me.”

“I don’t want to say goodbye. I want to say thank you.”

“You will always be in my heart, but now, it is time to move on.”

“I will always love you.”

“I will miss you always.”

“It’s time for us to part.”

“You will always have a big part of my heart.”

“I wish you well, but it is time for me to go.”

“I mean it when I say this: I love you, I will miss you, but it is time for goodbye.”

“I have to say goodbye now.”

“I will never forget you.”

“Please don’t be angry, but it is time for us to part.”

“It’s not your fault, and it’s not mine. But it’s time for us to go on.”

“There is no preparation for departure.”

“I don’t want to say goodbye, but I do want to say, ‘see you soon.’”

“I want to leave you with these words.”

“I can’t ask you to stay, and I know you want to leave.”

“Thank you for what you’ve given me.”

“I cannot say goodbye to someone who has shaped me so much.”

“I will always think of you.”

“This isn’t working out—for either of us.”

“I love you, but this is no longer healthy for either of us.”

“Love is different than function. I love you, but this isn’t functional anymore.”

“It’s hard to say this, but I’m ready to move on.”

“I’m ready to say goodbye.”

“It’s over.”

“What we have created together is so special, and now it is time to let it be.”

“Let’s go after tomorrow.”

“Change is hard, but it is fulfilling.”

Breaking up with someone isn’t easy. There are a wide range of emotions that come with letting someone go. Whether you are the one to initiate the breakup, or you are the one to experience that loss without much of say, it is important to express yourself. These quotes are sad, direct, emotional, fulfilling, and hopefully will provide you with the capacity to heal. Make them your own. Use them in your own life. Embrace the change. You will get through this.

The post It’s Over Quotes: 61 Breakup Quotes to Say Goodbye appeared first on The Date Mix.

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ramosjuniorus-blog · 6 years

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Sarcastic Quotes And Sayings

https://www.aswadwrites.in/sarcastic-quotes/

Sarcastic Quotes And Sayings

If you carry contempt for or mock something, the use of words that say something else but mean the other, then this is sarcasm. In other phrases, you are the usage of irony to do it. I guess, better than defining what’s sarcasm. Must I permit the subsequent listing of sarcastic quotes do the talking? Below you will find our collection of inspirational, wise, and humorous old sarcasm quotes, sarcasm sayings, and sarcasm proverbs, collected over the years from a variety of sources.

Sarcastic Quotes

Sarcastic Quotes About Love

This is what happened in love. One of you cried a lot and then both of you grew sarcastic. ~ Lorrie Moore

The consumer isn’t a moron; she is your wife. ~ David Ogilvy

Martyrdom: The only way a man can become famous without ability. ~ George Bernard Shaw

When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President; I’m beginning to believe it. ~ Clarence Darrow

99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name. ~ Steven Wright

Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them. ~ P. J. O’Rourke

If life gives you lemons, then be thankful for it. I have been getting only the peels for as long as I can remember! ~ Anonymous Feared

No, no, no. I’m not insulting you. I’m just describing you. ~ Anonymous

Marriage is a bliss for people who aren’t in it. ~ Anonymous

Read: 20+ Beautiful Heart Touching Quotes Collection

I asked you for some lunch money, and you gave me a dollar? Your benevolence always touches my soul! ~ Anonymous

Oh, come on! I am not being sarcastic with you. You really sing well… In fact, you sing better than the wretched crows in my neighborhood! Damn those crows… ~ Anonymous

If a stranger offers you a piece of candy, take two. ~ Anonymous

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury. ~ Groucho Marx

You’d be in good shape if you ran as much as your mouth. ~ Anonymous

Types of People Eye Roll and Heart Eyes I sometimes think that God in creating man somewhat overestimated his ability. ~ Oscar Wilde

Sarcastic Quotes About Love

Mirrors can’t talk, lucky for you they can’t laugh either. ~ Anonymous

When a man steals your wife there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. ~ Sacha Guitry

Sarcastic Quotes About Fake People

Shocked thick guy using modern technology Baby Girl getting a Shot Support bacteria – they’re the only culture some people have. ~ Anonymous

Many wealthy people are little more than janitors of their possessions. ~ Frank Lloyd Wright

Not all women are annoying. Some are dead. ~ Anonymous

This place is so weird that the cockroaches have moved next door. ~ Anonymous

Marriage is a wonderful invention: then again, so is a bicycle repair kit. ~ Billy Connolly

If you’ve never met the devil in the road of life, it’s because you’re both heading in the same direction. ~ Anonymous

Time is the best teacher; Unfortunately, it kills all its students! ~ Robin Williams

When people ask me stupid questions, it is my legal obligation to give a sarcastic remark. ~ Anonymous

I never knew what real happiness was until I got married. And by then it was too late. ~ Max Kauffmann

Check: Incredible Sad Status For Whatsapp

If you don’t want a sarcastic answer, then don’t ask a stupid question. ~ Anonymous

I can be quite sarcastic when I’m in the mood. ~ J.D. Salinger

Like good wine, marriage gets better with age – once you learn to keep a cork in it. ~ Gene Perret

It’s a funny thing that when a man hasn’t anything on earth to worry about, he goes off and gets married. ~ Robert Frost

The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it in your back pocket. ~ Will Rogers

I am in full possession of the amazing power of being sarcastic. ~ Sarah Rees Brennan

I am busy right now, can I ignore you some other time? ~ Anonymous

Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it? ~ Anonymous

Sarcastic Quotes About Fake People

The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky tire. ~ Anonymous

There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works. ~ Will Rogers

Sarcastic Quotes About Life Lessons

He loves nature in spite of what it did to him. ~ Forrest Tucker

Handsome gangster Portrait of a surprised cat breed Scottish Fold It might look like I’m doing nothing, but at the cellular level, I’m really quite busy. ~ Anonymous

Oh, you hate your job? Why didn’t you say so? There’s a support group for that. It’s called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar. ~ Drew Carey

You can be whatever you want; however, in your case, you should probably aim low. ~ Anonymous

Life is like a roller coaster, and I’m about to throw up. ~ Anonymous

I don’t worry about terrorism. I was married for two years. ~ Sam Kinison

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory. ~ Steven Wright

It sounds like English, but I can’t understand a word you’re saying. ~ Anonymous

Check: Attitude Quotes And Status (Latest Collection)

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint. ~ Mark Twain

I love deadlines, I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by. ~ Anonymous

I’m a man of leisure. That’s because I have an English degree and can’t get a job. ~ Jarod Kintz

I’ll always cherish the original misconception I had of you. ~ Anonymous

Join the Army, meet interesting people, kill them. ~ Anonymous

You know there’s just one more thing to need to do after you crack a joke… Tickle the other person! ~ Anonymous

I’ve had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me and the second one didn’t. ~ Patrick Murray

Why would someone who has an average life expectancy of 75 years, get married when he is 29? ~ Anonymous

Sarcastic Quotes About Life Lessons

Tell me… Is being stupid a profession or are you just gifted? ~ Anonymous

Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I are not sure about the universe. ~ Albert Einstein

Sarcastic Quotes On Life Facts

Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence. ~ Ashleigh Brilliant

I feel so miserable without you, it’s almost like having you here. ~ Stephen Bishop

Marry me and I’ll never look at another horse! ~ Groucho Marx

Marriage is a romance in which the heroine dies in the first chapter. ~ Cecilia Egan

Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell. ~ Joan Crawford

Love is the answer, but while you’re waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions. ~ Woody Allen

Marriage has no guarantees. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery. ~ Erma Bombeck

Marriage is the chief cause of divorce. ~ Groucho Marx

In my house I’m the boss, my wife is just the decision maker. ~ Woody Allen

We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops. ~ Henny Youngman

You’re not that lucky and I’m not that desperate! ~ Anonymous

Read: Sad Quotes About Life

Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution? ~ Groucho Marx

The only time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he’s a baby. ~ Natalie Wood

If you’re too open-minded, your brains will fall out. ~ Lawrence Ferlinghetti

Marriage is given and take. You’d better give it to her or she’ll take it anyway. ~ Joey Adams

There’s a way of transferring funds that is even faster than

electronic banking. It’s called marriage. ~ James Holt McGavran

Democracy means simply the bludgeoning of the people by the people for the people. ~ Oscar Wilde

Sarcastic Quotes On Life Facts

I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly. ~ Sir Winston Churchill

Do not worry about your difficulties in mathematics, I can assure you that mine are all greater. ~ Albert Einstein

Sarcastic Quotes About Annoying People

“Well, my imaginary friend thinks you have serious mental problems.”

“I’ve got a good heart but this mouth…”

“Cancel my subscription because I don’t need your issues.”

“Me pretending to listen should be enough for you.”

“If you’re waiting for me to give a shit, you better pack a lunch. It’s going to be while.”

“Ugliness can be fixed, stupidity is forever.”

“Zombies eat brains. You’re safe.”

“Are you always this retarded or are you making a special effort today?”

“You’d be in good shape… if you run as much as your mouth.”

“If karma doesn’t hit you, I gladly will.”

“Keep rolling your eyes. Maybe you’ll find a brain back there.”

“Tact is for people who aren’t witty enough to use sarcasm.”

“You always do me a favor, when you shut up!”

“Tell me how I have upset you because I want to know how to do it again.”

“I’m not crazy! The voices tell me I am entirely sane.”

“Sure I’ll help you out… the same way you came in.”

“Shut your mouth when you’re talking to me.”

“I’d agree with you but then we’d both be wrong.”

“Think I am sarcastic? Watch me pretend to care!”

Check: Good Morning Quotes

“My friends are so much cooler than yours. They’re invisible.”

“If it looks like I give a damn, please tell me. I don’t want to give off the wrong impression.”

“You sound better with your mouth closed.”

“If ignorance is bliss. You must be the happiest person on this planet.”

“I’m smiling… that alone should scare you.”

“If you wrote down every single thought you ever had you would get an award for the shortest story ever.”

Sarcastic Quotes About Annoying People

“If I promise to miss you, will you go away?”

“I’ll try being nicer if you try being smarter.”

“Thank you for leaving my side when I was alone. I realized I can do so much without you.”

Sarcastic Quotes About Relationships

“Fighting with me is like being in the Special Olympics. You may win, but in the end, you’re still a retard.”

“Well, at least your mom thinks you’re pretty.”

“My neighbor’s diary says that I have boundary issues.”

“Just because the voices only talk to me doesn’t mean you should get all jealous. You’re just a little too crazy for their taste.”

“Don’t worry about what people think. They don’t do it very often.”

“If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.”

“I clapped because it’s finished, not because I like it.”

“I’m not listening, but keep talking. I enjoy the way your voice makes my ears bleed.”

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“I’m not sarcastic. I’m just intelligent beyond your understanding.”

“Sarcasm, because beating the crap out of people is illegal.”

“Sarcasm is the body’s natural defense against stupidity.”

“I am busy right now, can I ignore you some other time?

“That is the ugliest top I’ve ever seen, yet it compliments your face perfectly.”

“Life’s good, you should get one.”

“No, you don’t have to repeat yourself. I was ignoring you the first time.”

“Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit! Yet it remains the funniest!”

“I’m sorry while you were talking I was trying to figure where the hell you got the idea I cared.”

“Just keep talking, I yawn when I’m interested.”

“Silence is golden. Duct tape is silver.”

“I’d tell you to go to hell, but I work there and don’t want to see your ugly mug every day.”

“I never forget a face, but in your case, I’ll be glad to make an exception.”

Sarcastic Quotes About Relationships

“Sarcasm: Helping the intelligent politely tolerate the obtuse for thousands of years.”

“Everyone has the right to be stupid, but you are abusing the privilege.”

“People say that laughter is the best medicine… your face must be curing the world.”

Sarcastic Quotes About Work

“Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until they speak.” – Steven Wright

“When people ask me stupid questions, it is my legal obligation to give a sarcastic remark.”

“It’s okay if you don’t like me. Not everyone has good taste.”

“You look good when your eyes are closed, but you look the best when my eyes closed.”

“Mirrors can’t talk, lucky for you they can’t laugh either.”

“If had a dollar for every smart thing you say. I’ll be poor.”

“I don’t believe in plastic surgery. But in your case, go ahead.”

“Are you always so stupid or is today a special occasion?”

“I feel so miserable without you, it’s almost like having you here.”

“If you find me offensive. Then I suggest you quit finding me.”

“Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.”

“If I wanted to kill myself I would climb your ego and jump to your IQ.”

“I love sarcasm. It’s like punching people in the face but with words.”

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“I don’t have the energy to pretend to like you today.”

“I’m not saying I hate you, what I’m saying is that you are literally the Monday of my life.”

“I’m sorry I hurt your feelings when I called you stupid. I really thought you already knew.”

“Sarcasm – the ability to insult idiots without them realizing it.”

“Unless your name is Google stop acting like you know everything.”

“Yet despite the look on my face… you are still talking.”

“Find your patience before I lose mine.”

“Just because I don’t care doesn’t mean I don’t understand.”

“Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence.�� – Ashleigh Brilliant

Sarcastic Quotes About Work

“Sarcasm: because arguing with stupid people just wouldn’t be as much fun.”

“If at first, you don’t succeed, skydiving is not for you.”

“My imaginary friend says that you need a therapist.”

“Let’s share… You’ll take the grenade, I’ll take the pin.”

Alone Quotes And Lonely Feelings

50+ Meaningful Quotes For You

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ahmerjohnny-blog · 6 years