Imagine the end of the beginning for Thorin…
Author’s note: request for angst + thorin by @anjhope1 I hope you enjoy and sorry for the long wait!
Warnings: a short angst with a sad ending
You were a wreck. A running whirlwind of a mess, heart pounding and fear at its highest. You knew in your bones, you could feel the loss. The loss of too many friends and loved ones. But there was no way, no way in all of Valar that Thorin had-
No! He was surely fine, he was surely victorious at the top of that icy cliff, catching his breath and looking down at his comrades with pride. Surely..?
In any case, he was too stubborn to leave, too stubborn to not rule over his rightfully owned kingdom under the mountain that he had just taken back. He outwitted the fire breathing dragon Smaug. Such a worm in the words of the King himself. He had escaped from the Woodland Elves prison, escaped from the King of Goblins lair, fought trolls and traveled miles and miles to get here. He had so much to do as a King and so much to celebrate.
But when you reached the top of the pale orc’s fort-hold the blood drained from your face. This had to be an illusion. Where was Azog?! How could he have possibly defeated Thorin, no there was no way. You refused to accept what was in front of you. Thorin’s body was crumpled to the ground, his sword not too far away from him. Blood was everywhere and from what you could see of his body, it was most likely his. You hurled yourself over Thorin’s body, “Thorin where is he, I’ll kill him I’ll-“
His breathing was labored as he shook his head, “Shh,” Thorin could hardly whisper, “His defiling days are over.” He was smiling now that you were before him, as if he wasn’t in agony from his body being battered. The light in his eyes was bright, the lightest of blue. “I defeated him.” He said proudly but you couldn’t smile just yet. You dropped your sword that had been frozen in your grip, ready to swing at any orc. Your hands swept over his body, not needing to look hard for the gaping wound that was causing Thorin so much pain. He reached for your hands as they had started to tremble with uncertainty for his life. “Please Thorin,” You held in a sob as his fingers interlaced with yours, “don’t leave me.” “I will always be by your side amrâlime,” It was hard for him to say much more, and there was so much unsaid. You were trying to blink the tears away but that just made them spill down your cheeks. “My King,” you choked as you leaned over to kiss him for the first and last time.
“I love you,” The words were a soft caress for him as his final breath left his lungs. His eyes were forever locked with yours as he graced you with his lips lifted in a smile. One that had always made you feel special and had your heart racing. It now broke you into two pieces as you couldn’t feel the beat of his pulse and his body grew colder and colder.
You had screamed at the world “NO!” Until your throat felt like it was on fire and you had no more tears left to cry. It wasn’t fair! How could life be so cruel as to take someone who fought for the good, fought for his people, fought for his home! Yet he wouldn’t be able to live in it. It was too cruel for you to bare as you curled up beside him, body shaking with grief.
You couldn’t move as Bilbo and Dwalin came to grieve with you. They tried comforting you as best they could but it was Balin who finally wrapped you into a hug, turning you away from the King who would’ve been ruling under the mountain. The King who had your heart and hadn’t known it until the end. He took it with him, it was his to rule and his alone.
Visiting Erestor in his Library
Platonic to Romantic
- When you first visit Erestor in his library, you may be his friend, but that doesn’t mean he isn’t going to set explicit boundaries with you.
- It’s nothing personal, thats just how Erestor is with all of his friends and you are absolutely no exception to this rule.
- Not to mention his work is absolutely extensive and needs for those moments to be uninterrupted and not filled with being social.
- Erestor tells you what his itinerary looks like and when he is available to be social if you must visit him while he is working.
- This doesn’t mean though that he doesn’t enjoy or look forward to you visiting him, of course he’s not going to tell you that he does, but he looks forward to them.
- If Erestor has granted you with specific times to visit him in the library during his workday, then you are far from a pest and someone who is unenjoyable- bonus points is that he hasn’t straight up slammed his office door in your face.
- Erestor plans for your visits accordingly and readies for any snacks and drinks like tea and wine or just regular water.
- Erestor is very punctual and expects for you to be on time for every visit you make to his office, when you aren’t it’s enough to make him antsy and pace while he waits.
- Even despite the friendly nature of your visits there’s still a formality to them, that never wavers no matter how long you’ve been friends.
- Also he expects too that you learn not to overstay your welcome and for you to leave in a timely manner.
- When the nature of your relationship with Erestor shifts from platonic to romantic, the stern bookworm is going to be relatively lax in a few changes in his imposed rules.
- Rather than being so stingy about times of meeting when he has in between work, he likes the more unexpected visits.
- Don’t be fooled when he starts softly grumbling about how he is still working, at that point he absolutely expects for you to take a seat and just keep him company while he continues to work.
- Your presence in his office while he works is so soothing and he enjoys every second of it.
- He will converse a little with you while he continues on with work, asking you questions about your day or work or answering any of your questions even about work.
- When others come to visit Erestor, like to bring him more reports and the like, they all seem surprised that you are there while he is not in the middle of a break!
- Erestor simply brushes them off and ignores any of their poking and prodding and kicks them out just as quickly as they arrived.
- Erestor still makes the same accommodations to share a meal or two with you while you visit him in his office, locking his office door to keep any interruptions at bay.
- Erestor is less likely to be as stringent about time when you leave too, content that as long as you don’t disrupt his work too terribly, you can stay.
- Though on days where you two have been in the library, hiding and making out... Erestor definitely needs some time away so he can calm down and refocus on his work day.
- Expect though when he gets home to pick right back up from where you left off, having been left stewing the rest of the day.
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