#It's just a fast food mascot but still | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

heartfullofleeches · 6 months

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do you ever just feel like an old man browsing tumblr because youre so behind? liek everyone was fixtated on puppyboy reader and fast food reader and ALL the readers and i wasnt and now im fixtated on fast food reader while everyones now fixtated on lacey and lucy T_T

If u want to could u do a scenario where fast food reader gets kidnapped? Make it as short as u want i just wanna read smth fromyou lol

Bound and unable to move - you lay motionless on the dirty floor of some unmarked van; counting the blood splatters on the ceiling to pass the time. 32, 33, 34 - wow, these guys are really serious. Being kidnapped by hardened criminals would've gotten you a win on the bingo card of all the fucked things happen to you on the job - if you hadn't already been kidnapped twice this week. It just had to be a Friday too. Your boss will use this little encounter to drag you back in for the weekend due to "concerns for your safety" or whatever other bullshit they make up to keep you on duty. Speaking of staff - why haven't they saved you yet?

"They're too loud. Shut them up."

You're about seventy percent sure these guys aren't telepathic... It's when one of the crooks tells you they aren't that you come to the conclusion that you've been talking out loud this whole time. A faint riiip sounds from the passenger seat as the one sitting in it stands, duct tape in hand. You plant your feet against the wall, pushing yourself upright as they approach.

"Before you do this - just know the only reason you all are still alive is probably because my coworkers are placing rock paper scissors to see who gets to keep your spines. You'll honestly be lucky if you die here."

The kidnappers eyes narrow behind their mask. As their foot draws back, static coming from the radio stops them from bring it down on your chest. They turn as the driver findles with the radio as the static crackles and pops from its speakers, bashing his fist against the dashboard.

"Why won't this fucking thing turn off!"

A familiar voice overlaps with the static.

"Over come with guilt for their wrongdoings, the driver takes the gun from the glove compartment and places it against his temple - pulling the trigger. The employee closes their eyes, and keeps them closed until they are free"

Your eyes clamp shut right as the driver reaches for the glove compartment. They catch a glimpse of the man placing the gun against the side of his head - a loud bang causing you to squeeze them tighter. Chaos erupts soon after - as if there wasn't enough already. Before the surviving crooks had time to process what just happened, the entire van quakes with the reverberating boom of something large hitting it from outside. The back door is torn from its hinges, cold air seeping through like blood from a fresh wound. You hear the kidnappers raise their guns and voices in defense, weapons tumbling to the floor as as sharp metal scrapes along the walls of the van. A wet snout presses against your cheek - heavy tongue licking the sweat from your damp skin.

"I'm okay, Lambchop. The ropes are a little tight, but I'm unharmed otherwise. Please go easy on them."

The mascot snorts in response. At least you tired. Two pairs of hands pick you up off the floor of the van and drags you out as the first scream tears through the bitter night. You feel weightless as they carry you back inside and sit you down in a booth. One set of hands checks your face, hands and every exposed inch of skin for bruises or scratches. The others gentle cup your cheeks.

"Y/n, open your eyes."

"I physically can't until you untie me."

Your chest becomes lighter as the ropes fall off you. The first sight you see as you reopen your eyes is the janitor pocketing their pocket knife and the concern in the succubus' gaze as she removes her hands from your face. The Janitor is the first to speak.

"Are you okay?"

You rub at the rings around your wrist. "Probably would've had my chest caved in if the Storyteller didn't bail me out, but I'm okay now."

The janitor's hands tighten into fists. The succubus' eyes dark so deeply they turn near black, but she hides her anger behind a sweet smile.

"Well since you're okay we'd better it going. I'm sure the ball pit hands can help you relax better than you could."

"Where are you two heading?"

The janitor speaks up for her. "We're going back outside. I need to get my spines before Lambchop completely turns their bodies into paste."

#yandere oc #yandere imagines #yandere headcanons #yandere x you #yandere scenarios #yandere insert #yandere #yandere x reader #yandere blurb #Fast Food Reader #yandere teratophilia #yandere drabble

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joeys-babe · 16 days

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Joey B Blurbs: Angel Eyes

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Summary: You attempt to prank Joe, but his angel-like eyes and all-convincing pout have your prank backfiring.

Warnings: Fluff, pranks!

Pairing: Joe Burrow x reader

Imagine Universe: Into the Mystic

A/N: Part 5 of blurb night!

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No particular date for this blurb!

“Dinner time!” - you

Grinning as I paused the music playing over my speaker, I couldn't help but feel nothing but happiness watching my three boys run into the kitchen from the living room.

“Looks great, baby.” - Joe smiled

“Thanks, but I'm sure it won't look too good when you're cleaning it off plates later.” - you

“I don't care, that's our rule. If someone fixes it, the other cleans it. If we both cook, we both clean.” - Joe

I stood on my tiptoes and gave him a big kiss.

“Crap, I forgot drinks.” - you mumble, sighing

“You sit down, I’ll get ‘em.” - Joe

Before doing as Joe said, I got the twins into their booster seats and then sat down myself.

Joe walked back into the dining room just a moment later, his big hands allowing him to hold all four cups.

“Thanks.” - you

“Of course.” - Joe

Joe then put food onto all our plates, taking one of my hands in his when we started eating.

“Love you.” - Joe

“Love you too.” - you

——

After dinner, it was bath time for Tyson and Miles.

“We seriously need to order wet suits.” - Joe

“Why?” - you laughed

“They splash!” - Joe

“Oh, suck it up. Let's go.” - you

The tub was filled moments later, and Tyson and Miles climbed in. They were still young enough to bathe together - not like they would agree to do it separately anyway.

“Look!” - Tyson

Ty held up one of the plastic bath toys in Joe’s face, showing off his little tiger toy.

“That’s cool buddy. It’s like the mascot for the Bengals.” - Joe

“Yup!” - Tyson

Joe grabbed their mini basketball hoop out of the bath toy drawer and suction-cupped it to the shower wall.

“Can you make a basket, bubs?” - you

I handed Miles a mini-basketball, and he nodded and launched the ball across the shower.

Somehow making it in, Joe looked at me shocked.

“Gah-lee! Draft him to the league.” - Joe

“He’s got a cannon of an arm like his daddy does.” - you winked

Joe smiled and playfully rolled his eyes, handing Tyson a ball in the process.

“Let's start actually washing.” - you laughed

——

After getting the twins completely washed off and dried Joe and I headed to their room to get them dressed and ready for bed.

They wore matching pajamas, of course.

Miles and Tyson climbed into Tyson’s bed like they did every night for Joe to tell them a story. I laid down next to them and buckled up for the story Joe was about to tell.

“What kind of story do you guys want to hear tonight?” - Joe

“Lo- ve.” - Tyson

“A love story?” - you

Tyson nodded, so Joe continued.

“Okay. I’ll tell you my favorite one.” - Joe

He grinned, and not only did I know his devious smile was directed towards me, but I knew it meant he was up to something.

“One day, this boy, we’ll name him Joe, went to school.” - Joe

“That's your name!” - Miles

I immediately knew where this was headed, and I felt butterflies swarm my stomach.

“Yup. It was the first day of his senior year of high school. Not thinking much, he went to his first-period class. His teacher always made a boy and a girl sit together, and Joe thought he’d hate it, but it ended up being the best thing to ever happen to him.” - Joe

Both of the boys gasped, making Joe chuckle before he continued.

“Joe found his seat and saw that a girl he'd never seen before was sitting there. He thought she was beautiful, but Joe was focusing on football. Joe would soon find out that her name was y/n.” - Joe

“Like Mommy!” - Miles

“Yup, like Mommy. Joe and y/n talked the entire class, and they did that every day. They quickly realized that they had a lot in common and became best friends. Fast forward a bit, y/n wins homecoming queen, and Joe escorts her on the field. There, y/n called Joe her best friend… and told him that he was cute.” - Joe

There was another gasp from the twins, and I rolled my eyes with a smile on my face.

“Woah!” - Tyson

“I know, right? Not too long before that, Joe realized that he had a crush on her, but he just didn't know how to drop hints. After a little brainstorming, Joe asked y/n to the dance at school, but she already had a date.” - Joe

“Oh no!” - Tyson

“That's what Joe thought too, but the dance ended up being the best day of Joe’s life. The guy y/n went to the dance with ditched her, and Joe went alone. Y/n found Joe walking around in the hallways by himself, and she asked if he wanted to go see which teachers left their classroom doors open. Joe said yes, and y/n held his hand as they walked through the hallways. The chemistry door was open, which was the class they met in. They sat down at their table, and Joe realized it would be the perfect time to tell her how he felt. Joe told y/n he liked her, and y/n liked Joe too.” - Joe

Another gasp from Miles and Tyson, and I giggled at the look on their faces as Joe told the story of him and I getting together.

“Joe then asked y/n to be his girlfriend, and she said yes. Guess what happened next.” - Joe

“What?” - Miles

“They kissed.” - Joe

“Ew!!” - Miles

“Aww!” - Tyson

I laughed at their differing opinions, which were stated at the same time, and Joe did too, before giving me a wink.

“They live happily ever after?” - Tyson

“Yup. They got married and are still together to this day. They love each other very much. They're parents too, to twin boys.” - Joe

“Like me and Ty?” - Miles

“Mhm, and y/n is pregnant with a baby girl.” - Joe

“Like Mommy!” - Tyson

“Wait… is it about you and Mommy?” - Miles

Joe looked at me with a tiny smile on his face, the bling in his eyes making my heart flutter.

“Yes. That's how we met. The best day of my life.” - Joe grinned

——

“That was super sweet, Joey.” - you

“The story?” - Joe smiled

We had just walked into our bedroom from putting the twins to sleep, and my mind was stuck on Joe retelling the story of how we met.

“Yeah. I'm glad I got it right the first time.” - you

“Get what right?” - Joe

“Picking a boyfriend. We really said one and done.” - you laughed

“For real, but I’m glad too. Thank god for boy-girl seating chart teachers.” - Joe

Joe plopped onto the bed onto his stomach after pulling his shirt off, asking without words for me to lay down and scratch his back.

I walked over and leaned down, pressing a kiss between his shoulder blades before waking over to the bathroom.

In our usual routine, Joe and I would shower together. We took the time to share some non-sexual intimacy while spending our uncommon alone time exclusively together.

But today, Joe’s getting pranked.

Walking into the bathroom, I shut the door and locked it behind me.

I rushed to set my phone up to start videoing, then turned the shower on.

Almost instantaneously, Joe was knocking on the bathroom door.

Looking at the camera and laughing, I let him knock a couple of times before opening the door.

“Baby? Are you showering without me?” - Joe

He had his bottom lip stuck out in a pout, giving me his classic pleading angel eyes. Joe knew that combo got him anything.

“I just felt like having some alone time.” - you

Joe’s mouth fell open as he stared at me, honestly looking offended.

“What?” - Joe

“I wanted some alone time.” - you chuckle

“You seriously don't want me to shower with you?” - Joe

I stepped up on my tiptoes and pecked Joe’s lips, patting his chest when I pulled away.

“Maybe next time, babe.” - you

Making sure I was off-camera, I started undressing and the look on Joe’s face made me feel sad.

Once I was fully undressed, I hopped in the glass shower and shut the door behind me.

I looked over at Joe only to find him staring right at me with the same pout on his face.

“Aww, c’mere. I was just joking. You can shower with me, baby.” - you

“That's what I thought.” - Joe mumbled

When Joe undressed and hopped into the shower, I pulled him into my arms and pressed kisses all over his neck and face.

“You were videoing that entire thing weren't you?” - Joe

“Of course.” - you grinned

“You’re going to be the death of me.” - Joe

“Good way to go out though, right?” - you

“The best.” - Joe smiled

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Authors note: Next fic at 9:25!!!

Requests for this fic;

#joe burrow #bengals #joe burrow imagine #joe burrow x reader #joey b #cincinnati bengals #joe burrow fan fic

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muzanswaifu · 1 year

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A Step Ahead

Yandere! Tomioka x Fem! Reader

18+

After celebrating New Year's in the city with your friends, it's time to go home for the night. A man is behind you. What will you do?

This is a game I've come up with where I will provide you with a couple paragraphs of story then give you choices for what actions the reader takes next. The winner of the poll will be the next section of the story the I will give you guys the next round of choices until the fanfic is concluded. Smut will occur at some point. Please join!

Warnings: Yandere, Smut later on

“We’ll see you later!”

“Yeah, see ya!”

You slowly turned away from them, walking down the busy street toward the eastern exit, passing several parade mascots and prancing dancers covered head to toe in loud clothing. The New Year’s Festival was always busy, but this year seemed to be especially popular, almost twice the amount of people than usual. You also were only visiting the city to visit friends and celebrate, but it just seemed so strange that everything was so crowded. Lines were longer for games and food couldn’t be made fast enough. You nearly didn’t stay long enough for the fireworks due to such overstimulation but with some pestering and blackmail by your friends, you bore through it long enough.

Quite honestly, you didn’t even want to spend so long in the city tonight. If you were up to you, you all would have gone to the festival, played a couple games, ate some food, watched a stage play, then gone back to someone’s home to lie around and gossip. But the ladies insisted you stay out all night, fooling around and even flirting with some boys that your fathers most certainly wouldn’t have approved of you talking to. It’s not that you minded too much being out and about, but it’s just… not what you had in mind for tonight specifically. You’ve been quite a bit anxious as of late, something felt off. You couldn’t point it out just yet, but the hair rising along your nape whispered cautions into your ear like a prophecy. It felt as if something were to go wrong at some point, so might as well quit while you were ahead.

Unfortunately, you didn’t live in the city like your friends. Your parents still had their residence in a nearby small village and as much as you would’ve liked to have moved out by now, you simply couldn’t afford it. Your job at the shop didn’t pay enough, you weren’t in a relationship, much less did you have a husband, and you just weren’t ready to leave home yet. Mother was pregnant again, much to your displeasure as you had grown quite tired of having so many siblings, and she needed help around the house that the others couldn’t provide. Your two older brothers were already moved out of the house doing their own things and your oldest sister gone and married. You were the oldest in the house now and that came with responsibilities. Mother nearly hadn’t let you come out tonight until Father convinced her to let you be young while you still could. Despite having turned eighteen all that time ago, he still treated you like a little girl. That had its perks fortunately.

Unfortunately it had its cons as well - curfews. You were leaving now and would still be late, but one could argue that was better than not at all. You would get a talking to at most. But the walk itself was a punishment in itself. The road to the village hadn’t been paved by the city yet due to its lack of popularity. Not many people traveled to and fro so it hadn’t become a priority. The wood was still thick this way of town, and despite the wildlife being marginally safe, the fear of the unknown was a danger more fearsome. You’d yet to experience an actual life threatening experience, but you hated to jinx it. The gravel was as coarse as ever, threatening your ankle with a twist and providing the soles of your shoes with a challenge. Save for the sparse lanterns lighting the path, darkness was smothering you and sending shocks of nervousness up your spine. Had it not been for the fireworks filling the area with light every few minutes, you might’ve turned back and begged one of your friends to let you spend the night.

The walk was relatively silent, a trill here and there from squirrels and rabbits but nothing too frightening. What was really bothering you was the crackling of branches and fallen leaves behind you. The sound seemed misplaced compared to its siblings to the left and right of you. That combined with the chill had you increasing your pace, desperate to get home and crawl into your warm, cozy bed already. The sounds quickened. You gasped.

A firework broke off just as you turned, light filling in the gaps between the trees and setting off a bomb of clarity to your surroundings.

There was a man behind you...

His vision disappeared far quicker than it came, the light only temporary as you were yet again accompanied by questions. You didn’t see much, he was several yards away and taller you think, dark and messy hair. He could’ve been a mile away, short, and bright and you still would’ve been afraid. Who the hell trails behind someone like that in the dark? Unless… he was following you...

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pianocat939 · 4 months

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Well, since my stupid ass decided to sleep early at night, I’m now stuck awake for the first day of my finals.

Love that.

Anyway, shit posting idea that came to me while I watched the ANA mascot dance to Perfect Night-

Yandere plane companies.

Now we could take this in corporate form or like literal planes.

Like, let’s say MC is just poor ass bitch who wants to go somewhere (home/friend/idfk) and buys not just main cabin- but basic economy.

Oh but won’t you look at that! They got moved to First Class for some reason. The flight attendants tell them they can’t change it. So they end up just chilling in the very good spot.

Mealtime? Well of course first class has better options. They could always choose the side menu… oh but you’re in luck! They have your favourite food right on the additional menu along with the main meals.

Usually it’s kind of…bland or simply sad airplane food, but you get a ceramic plate and it looks freshly cooked? How odd.

When the plane lands and they get their luggage, when they’re let off the plane, the staff say goodbye with “Please fly with us again! We would be very delighted to have you back.”

If MC takes a flight from a different company next time, there’s a corporate argument. They’re flaming at each other, trying to reduce prices for MC so that they’ll flight with them instead.

It’s really a hellfire in the background.

They’re even pulling up the lounges card. And of course they specifically make sure the lounges stock up on their favourites beforehand.

Now if we go with planes, I could totally see planes flying as fast as possible to get to MC’s departure airport faster to be the one to get selected for takeoff.

Planes definitely try to keep their internal conditions and engines as well working as possible so nothing malfunctions before take off.

(I’ve had a plane malfunction for 5 hours before take off only to wait 2 days so that one of the engines could be replaced. Thankfully I was still in Haneda and not like some unfamiliar place aha-)

Of course I have finals, but you know, we can just build on this shitpost if you want tehe-

#yandere #yandere x reader #yandere imagines #yandere planes #planes x reader #planes #blurbs

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dreambones · 3 months

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Just a handful of random mascots, still feeling drained from the wisdom teeth but I am bored af and need to entertain myself with something.

I keep playing with the idea to make a joke mascot horror game that would never be finished, my favorite places as a kid were Blockbuster and this fast food place I cant remember the name of, but if had this tv screens where you would order your food (listen that was super new and cool in the 90s). Anyway I decided to make random stuff for a video rental stuff that also has a fast food section because why not.

#mascot horror #artists on tumblr #concept art #character design #dream talking #my art #Rad Rentals

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weirdmarioenemies · 23 days

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Name: Chester Chomper Jr. Debut: This post from three years ago

Hey, so remember three years ago when we had you plant those Chester Chomper seeds to grow a Baby Chester Chomper for the sake of love and also profit? Well here he is! This is your son, who celebrated his third birthday just yesterday! Aren't you proud of him? They grow up so fast, huh?

As young as he may be, Chester Chomper Jr. already knows about the delectable taste of Plants vs. Zombies: Garden Warfare Cheetos from 2014, and I'm sure that hearing that makes you a proud parent. And it's good he does, given Chester Chomper Jr. is allergic to every food that isn't 2014 Garden Warfare Cheetos or zombies! I know this because I tried breastfeeding him once, and he ended up hospitalized for three weeks. But don't worry, even if the world's supply of 2014 Garden Warfare Cheetos runs out, there's enough corpses on Earth to last him a lifetime!

(his lollipop is made of both by the way i feel the need to clarify that)

Look! Chester Chomper Jr. is on a playdate in the Toy Corner with Mako and Spikina! Isn't it adorable? He even managed to share some of his 2014 Garden Warfare Cheetos with them, wow! Now, it's not good business practice to just give them away, but give Chester Chomper Jr. a break. He's only a child! He'll learn in due time.

Lately, Chester Chomper Jr. has been practicing his ABCs (so he can know how to spell "Cheetos" correctly) and 123s (so he can track how much product he's been selling). He's also a prodigy at video games, becoming a top-level Plants vs. Zombies: Garden Warfare player while he plays as an effigy of his dead father! Neat-o beans!

And due to his absolute, undeniable adorability, sales for 2014 Garden Warfare Cheetos have been up 1000000000%! (This is from "0," which means the current number being sold is also "0," but that means you can make the number as big as you want while still being correct...!)

I think you should feel proud of your son, and how much he's grown in these past three years. (As a plant, it turns out he's pretty good at that!) Someday soon, he'll be something more special than any of us... a Radical Snack Food mascot. Sniff! His father would be so proud!

"ALLLLLRIIIIIIIIIGHHHHTTTT!" - Chester Chomper Sr. (from beyond the grave)

#chester chomper jr.#chester chomper jr #chester chomper #mod hooligon #april fools #cheetos #ad

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allfryam · 5 months

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freshman 1000

this is the final part to the freshman 15 series that so many of you were begging for. It will be short but I’m sure you’ll enjoy.

Jakes roommate Ben was living alone now. After Jake had moved out, they never found a new roommate for him. Ben didn’t mind but he kinda missed Jake sometimes. He decided to visit him on his way back from class. When class was over, Ben went to the McDonald’s on campus to pick up some food. “What can I get for you today sir?” The worker asked. “Yeah let me get a medium cheeseburger meal with a Diet Coke” Ben said. “Anything else?�� “Yeah. I’m also going to get ten Big Macs, 15 large fries, a 20 piece nugget, a few ice cream cones, and I’m just gonna fill this bucket I brought with Dr Pepper.” the worker looked at him in shock.

Jake had been moved into a new dorm by the school after what happened to him. He got so heavy, he fell through the floor into someone else’s room when he tried to walk to the fridge. Jake’s new room was on the bottom floor this time, and it was much bigger. Ben arrived to Jake’s dorm and opened the door. “Hey dude! I brought you some food” Ben yelled. “Ugrhh” Jake murmured. Jake had somehow grown to over half a ton. He was huge. His massive stomach covered his legs and his fat feet stuck out like chubby stumps. His enormous arms hung by his sides looking like the trunks of trees. His fat face looked like it was melting with the amount of fat covering it. He had shallow breaths and smelled awful. There was no way to wash a person so big. Ben grabbed to food and fed it to Jake. Jake had become a bottomless pit. Living solely to eat and grow. Sometimes people would have parties where tons of people would come to Jakes dorm and feed him for hours. Jake never got full or anything though. It was all just a snack to him. He had bloodwork done once a week to ensure he was still healthy. No doctor could explain it but Jake was the healthiest person they’ve ever seen. Also the fattest. Jake had become the unofficial mascot of the university with his sheer size. Jake no longer attended classes but since they couldn’t fit him through his door anymore, they decided to just let him live there. And eat. And grow. Soon he would become too big for the room. It was happening fast too. With every passing day, it seemed like Jake had put on another 10 pounds. Even the local bakery owner gives their leftovers to Jake at the end of each day. Jake was quickly becoming the fattest person in history. It kinda turned him on.

#fat #fat belly #fatty #gaining fat #chubby #fat gut #fatty piggy #gaining #gaining weight #getting bigger

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casualheizouenjoyers · 1 year

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“don’t forget to like and subscribe!”

genshin youtubers au

characters included: childe, xiangling, nahida, 5wirl (aether, venti, xiao, kazuha & heizou), & kaeya

Childe (can be read as platonic or romantic)

100% a sweaty gaming streamer

he unironically owns a minecraft themed bed im SORRY

is really sweet to the fan artists in his community and hypes them up IMMENSELY

would wear a maid dress for a sub goal

i feel like his community would be like medium size with people who donate a LOT of money and subs

mainly on twitch, uploads complications from streams on youtube but no original content

streams late at night or super early in the morning even though he has nothing to do during the normal hours of the day, his neighbors hate his guts

would definitely be the type to show you off to chat

if you’re dating this man say goodbye to a normal sleep schedule you’re never getting it back

would unironically give you his merch for christmas

posts the worst takes on twitter, for the love of all that is sacred take control of his main account

unironically has called you his little pogchamp

Xiangling (platonic)

has a really cute cooking channel with a cute like animated chibi intro. gouba is the channel mascot and the design on every piece of merch

has the most aesthetic kitchen and posts a new tour/tutorial whenever she renovates it

occasionally posts videos from the kitchen of her dad’s restaurant and/or videos with her dad and they’re the most wholesome thing ever

being her friend or roommate instantly means being in at least one video to taste test

if you can’t cook she definitely tests out tutorials on you and asks for your advice on how to explain stuff

and if you can cook she definitely asks you to participate in friendly cooking competitions or challenges with her (her food is always better but she’s a sweetheart about it)

Nahida (platonic)

wholesome toy review channel

in my soul she has a hyperfixation on toy production so despite her young age her reviews are lowkey mad informative and oddly insightful

especially favors puzzle games and those fake pet toys (i had one of a cat growing up and i loved mr whiskers with my heart and soul)

tries to edit her videos herself, but eventually her big sibling (you) edits them while she watches and makes suggestions

you manage the ‘business’ side of the channel, like helping decide which toys to review and where to get them and manage any sponsorships and explain what those mean (she picks it up real fast though)

i imagine teucer also has a two review channel so the two would become friends while reader & childe are jokingly in a rivalry (or at least reader takes it as a joke, child is very 50/50)

Aether (romantic or platonic)

wholesome travel blogger who people keep trying to beat in subscriber count before deciding to become his friend

i imagine the abyss is like a company that tried to sponsor aether but he refused because the company was against his morals, and like the fauti are another company that has the same situation going on

enjoys showing people the best places to go in different countries and how to save lots of money while doing so

paimon is definitely his younger sister or like close enough friend that they’re basically siblings who goes with him and is really good with languages so she helps aether out

didn’t really have a set house anywhere and would just edit in hotel rooms or friends’ houses until he formed the youtube group 5wirl and they live together in a big house

people were worried about what his content would be during quarantine so he switched to making content with 5wirl and playing variety games while also still making content about how he plans his next destinations and stuff

definitely plays geoguesser he’s been everywhere he’s a god at it

literally collabs with everyone he’s so friendly, being with him would be a bit frustrating because at least before 5wirl you’re always going to be moving around but he treats you like royalty

most aesthetic instagram feed in the UNIVERSE, has to be convinced to post rare pictures of himself

venti (romantic or platonic)

first member of 5wirl! he’s a cover channel and his wind spirit form is his channel icon

either does the most beautiful cover you’ve ever heard or the most cursed parody in existence it’s always a toss up

LOVES fan artists and always commissions different artists to do the thumbnail for his covers and they’re gorgeous

another person to take twitter away from he only posts when he’s drunk

keeps forgetting to post when he’s about to go live so update accounts have to do it for him and his stream always crashes from the sudden influx of people

does drunk streams with kaeya and has a separate vods channel

chat first finds out about your existence during a drunk stream and you just awkwardly come in like “hi” 🧍🏻

first interaction with aether was when aether raided him on twitch and eventually they exchanged discords and became friends

dvalin is venti’s editor who remain anonymous

if you even jokingly mention you want venti to sing/play a song he’ll drop everything to do it for you

only plays any sort of video game on stream or in a video with xiao

xiao (romantic or platonic)

was convinced by venti to join 5wirl

xiao & venti first interacted with each other at a convention like vidcon and venti made up an intro song to go with his starting soon screen and they started to talk more

the first youtube person xiao would talk about you to is venti but he doesn’t let venti talk to you until he has to convince venti you’re real and not just an excuse to not hang out or call-

mostly plays horror games on stream, literally nothing startles this man he’s always sitting there like :| while venti is screaming his lungs out

he used to be in a youtube group with the other yakshas but they all decided to quit doing youtube or streaming and therefore xiao was super hesitant to join 5wirl but you & venti worked together to convince him to give it a shot

fucked up sleep schedule, has a really cool stream setup

kazuha (romantic or platonic)

1/2 of a buzzfeed unsolved true crime style channel with heizou, the two joined 5wirl at the same time

it’s a little different of a format, basically heizou does research of unsolved cases and presents his theories while kazuha does research on solved cases and heizou tries to figure out who the culprit was

likes to play music games as well, i headcannon that he has perfect pitch so he likes to do perfect pitch tests on stream (he has ‘beef’ with venti because they both have perfect pitch and do perfect pitch contests on stream and shit)

very aesthetic instagram, he occasionally collabs with aether to do some travel style stuff every once in a while to take a break as to not get burnt out from just doing the same content style

does solo content on the shared channel with heizou where he plays survival style games and shows off his fencing skills

kazuha has a fucked up sleep schedule but it wouldn’t affect you since he’s always mindful of his volume

tomo used to be the channel editor until he decided to go to film school and didn’t have anymore time so kazuha & heizou take turns editing with your aid

likes to play animal crossing on stream with you or team survival games like raft and always makes sure that if only one of you can survive it’s going to be you

likes to play minecraft on stream but only with other people, prefers survival to creative

heizou (romantic or platonic)

1/2 of shared channel with kazuha, it was originally his idea and he brought it up to kazuha because they were friends in highschool and thought at the very least it’d be a nice way to reconnect

when kazuha is on break for solo content he likes to play murder mystery games or invites you, xiao & venti (since heizou & aether are out filming travel content) to play clue with him. does he always win? yes. but it’s still really fun since venti likes to get very into his assigned persona/character and you do the same :)

also likes to do quizzes on the internet of like reading facial/body language and is INSANELY good at it

gets easily distracted from researching unsolved cases so you always help him stay focused and do research and he’s eternally grateful for that

doesn’t particularly enjoy playing jackbox games or any group variety stuff unless it’s with you & anyone from 5wirl

doesn’t really collab with sara but the two are friends and hang out at cons

always ropes you into acting in videos with kazuha that give people tips to remain safe in any sort of situation and not get taken advantage of

kaeya (romantic or platonic)

when not doing drunk streams with venti and occasionally rosaria he’s a fashion youtuber 100%

loves roasting subscriber outfits and also covers the history of trends

lovingly makes fun of his friends’ fashion sense but it’s all in good fun

makes sure whenever you go with him to cons y’all are the best dressed

the knights of favonius are a talent/management agency and aether is called an honorary knight because while he’s not part of the agency he does collab with a lot of their members

most stylish and lowkey youtuber merch

claims to be diluc’s brother, no one believes him and think he only says that so dawn winery can sponsor him and send him wine

usually has a good sleep schedule, but all his drunk streams are always at like 2 am so good luck with dealing with his hangover

the morning after drunk streams are always hell for the both of you

#aris writes #genshin x reader #genshin impact #nahida #kaeya #xiangling #childe #5wirl x reader #venti #heizou #aether #kazuha #xiao #genshin youtuber! au

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slumber-lexifer · 1 year

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Yandere fast food worker x reader gn

[Warning creepy yandere restaurant doesn't have a name yet ldk what to call the place ]

You live nearby this new restaurant it was abandoned when they rearbult it. you want to check it out, you enter the building, you noticed it was different, it was red and white with with cartoon characters on walls viewing you. it's probably the weird ass mascot jester with dead eyes looking deadpan at you shiver. you walk up to order at the cashier.

"excuse me" the cashier doesn't look up he has greenish hair a hat with heart with x init company logo, he got bags under his eyes like he never slept, hes pale sickly, a name tag with the name Jerry, he looks like he gonna sleep he still hasn't looked up you cough

"uhahm hello!" He jolted all concious came back he looked up. and shit his heart wasn't prepared to see a angel cheeks heating up nervously sweating what do you do when you see your soul mate,

fuck God oh no don't mess up "h..hi .how may..l..ta..take.y..your order?" god why am such a loser

"oh l just take a strawberry milkshake"

"Oh..ok..l.d..deliver. it at your table." his stutter is disappearing but now he's drenched in sweat, he wonder what your sweat would tast like, he shakes his head getting the thoughts out, the word is try, you walk off to a seat, he watches and goes to the kitchen to make your milkshake, he's struggling and clutching, his heartbeat it's fast, he's trying desperately to focus, he looks down trying to make the order, he grabs a straw, with no mental restraint to develop around his darling yet, he licks the straw, intrusive thought won, a peace of him in you made him weak to knees, "God he's pathetic" he thinks to himself, he doesn't know you yet and he's already wants to crawl in your skin to feel close to you, taking deep breaths in to at least function.

he delivers the milkshake in hand.

"Oh here you go made with care my dear." He softly laughs he lingers at you table breathing a bit heavy eyelidead before he focus comes back, he apologise, and hurrys off ,like ran off but not obvious.

"Um he's weird but this place has an eerie feel." You mumble, anyways you drink your milkshake, it tastes weird at first but you don't mind, there that feeling again, like there eyes are on you and you make sure sitting behind the jester mascot, well it's late so you pack up and leave, and youve left the milkshake empty. you left the restaurant.

"Oh God is this what love feels like it's living?" He whispes to himself, like he woke from a coma and got to experience the world. he came out the kitchen and looked where you were seated, and he pocketed the straw real quick, he hopes to see you again, when he doesn't have the night shift so he can learn you he hopes you order from your place so he can know were you live.

[A drawing of jerry and my first time writing fanfiction]

#my oc jerry #yandere #tw: yandere #yandere oc #yandere imagines #yandere blurb #yandere x you #yandere fast food worker #yandere headcanons #yandere x reader #yandere insert #yandere scenario

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edgy-ella · 7 months

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Here I am yet again with another Invader Zim theory

(Pray I do not make another)

MatPat’s old film theory on the series popped up in my recommended feed on YouTube today, and it got me thinking about something. In case you haven’t seen it, his theory was that Professor Membrane (and by extension, Dib and Gaz) was an alien, an Irken specifically, who had been banished to Earth by the Tallest in order to stop him from usurping their position.

It’s an old and silly theory that can be debunked in four simple words: “where’s Membrane’s PAK?” But like I said, it got me thinking. Instead of focusing on Irken/alien material on Earth, let’s focus on elements of human culture on the other planets we see in the show.

Isn’t it a bit odd how much distinctly human food is seen throughout the series, presumably made and consumed by alien species located several hundred light years away from Earth? Nachos, sandwiches, doughnuts, etc. They all look just like their Earth equivalents too, so presumably they’re one and the same and made with the same ingredients. So by extension, things like sugar, corn, cheese, and lettuce must also exist on Irk.

That wouldn’t be so weird—in fact, you could argue that it’s the show’s way of simplifying alien food into something more recognizable for a human audience and easier understood by younger viewers—except that we do see tons of distinctly alien foods in the show. Zim is seen eating a fun dip-like snack in a couple of episodes, and tons of unique alien foods are both seen and named in the episode where Zim gets sent back to Foodcourtia. So this isn’t just the show using visual language to instantly convey the idea of food to the viewer, there is a clear distinction between “human” food and “alien” food. Hell, there’s even something called a Vort Dog, which looks like a small hot dog with a band around the rim, so there’s even alien variations of human food.

But that’s not all! Shloogorgh's Flavor Monster, the restaurant place Zim is sentenced to work at, looks and functions exactly like a fast food place on Earth. An establishment that caters to multiple, distinct alien races, all with their own needs and cultures, and yet it still has the same old booths, cash registers, and happy mascot costumes you’d find at a MacMeaties or Krazy Taco. The kitchen itself is more automated than their Earth equivalents, but the point stands.

Another thing that stands out is how language is used by the other aliens in the show. Zim presumably has a universal translator built into his PAK (we hear what is likely his untranslated speech at the start of the Mysterious Mysteries episode) and given their military conquest, Irken is presumably the dominant language used by the other alien species in the show. But we see Dib interact with multiple other aliens in the show, all of whom would have no reason to know an Earth language like English. This only comes up a couple times in the show, like with the Plookesians, but is a lot more prevalent in the comics where Dib goes out into space more often. And he does interact with a lot of different species, many of which don’t seem to be under the control of the Irken empire. Dib is never shown to know how to speak Irken (unless Ten Minutes to Doom is canon and he retained that knowledge from when Zim’s PAK was stuck to him), and it’s unlikely that all of the different aliens he talks to would as well. Meaning the only alternative is that they’re all speaking English.

So we see human food, infrastructure, architecture, plumbing, and language scattered throughout the vast reaches of space, both within the Irken Empire and outside of it.

Let’s take that information with some of the stuff that MatPat brought up in his theory.

“I only hope the Irkens just so happen to use the same operating system as me.” Even though this line is meant to be a joke, it really does feel like a smoking gun for a link between human and Irken society and technology. The Irkens did know about Earth, but only as an unspecified mystery planet. Professor Membrane’s continued, staunch denial of aliens is odd considering the literal walking proof right in front of him, not to mention how big of a scientific discovery extraterrestrial life would be. And yeah, some of his technology does resemble the equipment in Zim’s base.

Which brings me to my next point: the Control Brains.

The Control Brains are weird. They have very few appearances in the show and don’t appear at all in the comics, but what little screen time they have tells us everything we need to know about them: they’re giant computers in control of the Irken Empire, responsible for handling everything from Irken reproduction to military affairs to corporal punishment. Their design also implies a connection to PAKs. Make no mistake; the Tallest aren’t in control, these guys are. But they’re machines, they didn’t just come out of nowhere. So who made them?

A lot of this is speculative on my part, I’m sure there’s some decade old interview where Jhonen deconfirms everything I’m about to say. But stick with me here.

I think that the PAKs were made by humans, and that Membrane at least knows about them and the Irkens.

A previous human presence in extraterrestrial territories would explain a lot. It explains why we see so much human food; why the alien restaurants, bathrooms, and prisons look and function so similarly to the ones on Earth, and it explains why everyone in space speaks English. It all originated from Earth. “I only hope the Irkens just so happen to use the same operating system as me,” Irken and human computers are compatible with each other. The Control Brains are giant Irken supercomputers. Ergo, they were likely built on human operating systems as well.

The obvious conclusion here is that they were made by Professor Membrane, but I actually don’t think that’s the case; the Irken Empire has probably been around much longer than Membrane has, no matter how many time warps you throw in. That being said, I think Membrane does know about whatever the origin of all of this was. That’s why he’s so in denial about aliens—he wants to keep his son away from that field of study to keep him safe. He ignores Zim’s plans for world conquest for the same reason Gaz does, “because he’s so bad at it.” Membrane doesn’t see Zim as a threat.

#invader zim #theory #I wrote this at 4:30 am #dib membrane #almighty tallest #professor membrane #ella essays

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heartfullofleeches · 2 months

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With lambchomp, would FF! reader be able to go to work?? Or would they now be permanently stuck in their house with lambchomp

As badly as FF wish it were that easy - Lambchop still wakes them up on time everyday for their shifts. If they really want to get out of work for the day they can suck up to the goat and they'll let them off the hook, but everything is still pretty much the same for FF aside from the fact they get to go home almost every evening now considering Lambchop was one of the main forces keeping them on the property and a fair amount of the entities outside of the restaurant are too afraid of Lambchop to attempt to steal them away when they return home with the demon at their side.

Fast Food Reader: Lambchop, you have to stop throwing away your toothbrushes. Just because you don't have one anymore doesn't give you permission to use mine.

[The mascot hangs their head in shame - hiding their face in Reader's shirt]

FF Reader: That's not gonna work on me twice-

Bathroom Succubus: Well I'll be damned... You two are actually living together. I've been wondering why it's so quite when I come back after closing.... So... Have you two.... y'know~

FF Reader: If you are asking if I've had sex with Lambchop the answer is no.

[Lambchop perks up-]

FF Reader: Don't get any ideas, buddy- My neighbors are nosy enough as is

[Lambchop immediately goes back to moping]

#Fast food Reader #yandere #yandere imagines #yandere x reader #yandere x you #yandere scenarios #yandere blurb #yandere insert #yandere headcanons #yandere oc #yandere text #yandere teratophilia

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regallibellbright · 2 months

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Some general thoughts on Precure All Stars F:

1) I knew it going in, but it really is delightful that the literal plot of this movie is some kind of all-powerful alien capable of destroying planets deciding after a fight to become the most powerful being in the universe: a magical girl. (Complete with mascot made of the weak and useless parts of yourself like compassion and a desire for friendship and ugh you’re not destroying things with our incredible cosmic power, get away from me.)

2) Laura: I’m looking for someone (my girlfriend.)

Mashiro: What a coincidence! I’m looking for my girlfriend too!

3) Love how StarTwi staff have said Lala’s “On my home planet I am TOTALLY AN ADULT” is a lie, but she still got grouped in on Team Adult… as the token kid.

4) I will say, the evil alien bunny girl does have a really good sense of style.

5) Tsubasa just fanboys every time he meets a princess, huh. What a dork. <3

6) I missed Manatsu and Laura so much. But you know who I missed more? Nodoka. Also love the inherent in-joke of Nodoka talking about how she misses and is looking for Rabirin to Mashiro, who shares a VA.

7) So yeah the train part made me go wibbly. Also, Nodoka took up running to build her stamina but still can’t run as fast as the others, none of whom are particularly athletic but also aren’t chronically ill. YES. (Laura trying to use her tail to bridge the gap was a nice touch.)

8) A tiny puppy reminds Yukari of her girlfriend, who is a dog.

9) The reunions were so cute, all times. Team Soaring Sky getting a group hug. Manatsu and Laura getting a HUGE hug while Yui and Amane and Nodoka and Asumi’s are a bit more restrained. So cute. (And then meanwhile, the adorable bunny mascot with Serious Trauma is having a very reasonable freakout. Poor Puca.)

10) Team Wing sees explosions in the castle and just vanishes for like five minutes only to reappear having already defeated Supreme’s “final boss.” High achievers, all of them.

11) Also La Mer getting to do her little “Victory!” jump and kick after her attack, even though they’re still running. So cute.

12) Reiterating what I said when Toei posted the first Big All-Precure Fight Scene: People were not kidding, Milky Rose looks dead there, and I’m not sure we actively see her get up later in the scene when everyone rallies? I… assume so? Looking forward to people uploading screenshots of a lot of the quick shot sequences to get a closer look (that one and the Cure Allies shots during All For One Forever, in particular.)

13) So the last couple movies hadn’t used Miracle Lights. Sure. But would it really be an All Stars movie - for a milestone anniversary, no less - without them? Of course not.

14) I am always a sucker for a good memory montage featuring the power of love. And oh, that was a good one. Not sure my favorite: Manatsu and Laura and Yui and Amane reacting to their shared memories are both fantastic, but so’s Yukari just standing by the wall as her memory plays out, and of course they pick That Scene from Healin’ Good for Rabirin and Nodoka’s maximum emotional impact.

15) That said: Distinctly NOT a fan of Supreme’s design featuring a darker skin tone once she goes evil and only when she goes evil, even though she keeps the black costume change in the ending.

16) I was admittedly a LITTLE disappointed when I got the soundtrack to realize they weren’t repeating All Stars Memories with a like twelve-minute fight scene track that was a medley of the theme songs. I do love the eight-minute medley track. All For One Forever is more than acceptable as a substitute, though.

17) We finally get the Delicious Party/Kirakira a la mode teamup we all wanted and deserved. Plus, bonus food-themed Cures adding their own powers to the mix! The ULTIMATE battle cake.

18) Also great: Laura and Minami’s “did we just become best friends?” attack. (All the thematic combos were delightful but seriously La Mer and Mermaid just seeing each other and going “let’s do a combo” is PERFECT.)

19) Yukari and Akira trying to act cool once they’re reunited, like Yukari hasn’t been utterly miserable all movie because her girlfriend is gone. Lala wiping out some cannon fodder so Yukari can have a moment with her girlfriend. (Lala understands. Her girlfriend was past the cutoff for getting two major cast members this movie. Probably because Nodoka and Rabirin with Team Prism had thematic purpose and a sequence break would look seriously weird - Hikaru seems like a shoo-in for Team Sky’s Goofball Energy And Preme.)

20) Cure Puca, like Ellee, gets the benefits of being a Precure seemingly requiring you to be a humanoid teenager/whatever’s going on with Cure Earth Who Is At Least This Tall Unless You’re A Mascot: being able to give a heroic speech.

21) Things I’m remembering last-minute I enjoyed: Sora showing the others her Hero Diary and being sad when she sees the “We Are Pretty Cure” page of her and Prism holding hands. Sora incorporating Yui’s and Manatsu’s mottos into her own. The lead Cures during the Portals Sequence all being like “yeah we don’t really know what’s going on here but we’ve all been in an All Stars movie or several before, we can handle this, sure.” The emphasis on hand-holding in general, particularly that FLASH of the battle they lost and Precious that Sora gets the first time she takes Yui’s hand and the vaguer one for Manatsu’s. And in a “this amused me” way, the way everyone getting lined up for the battle before the Requisite Explosion Jump is just them floating in space like a bunch of dolls on invisible shelves because it’s the only way to manage this all, there’s like 80 of them, it is SO MANY PRECURE.

So yeah, solid movie, I enjoyed it greatly. Probably gonna give it a minute until I finally watch the Healin’ Good one.

#precure blogging #precure all stars f

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soulsilvers · 9 months

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had another fairly normal dream of green. pokemas released FOUR new sygna suits for green at the same damn time just to cater to me i suppose. they were:

- fast food mascot green (he was french fries)

- literally the same blue sygna suit but with shoes that REALLY glow in the dark

- alola green wow! but his outfit is all extremely orange and tie-dye with the capability to hurt people.

- alola green in a kinda slutty medieval armor........ anyway

- red appeared too. but red was still just red

#cant tell if this is weirder or the dream i had about an animated reguri sitcom where red was a square and green was an orb #burger red to go along with french fries green would be so romantic

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kindestegg · 1 year

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Platinum Bones Week - 03/04 - Day 4: Feast

Day 4!! WHAT!! And that means we are so close to WAD too!! This one is WAY sillier, still with my teen/future King and Collector in mind.

Premise for this one is King is very hungry after going out hiking with Colly and they decide to hit up the local fast food joint. Shenanigans ensue.

King's paws scraped the earth underneath them, giving way as he slid down the hill and jumped off at its foot, ready to take the road back.

He puffed, quite tired, paws on his knees. At least, the water still dripping off his fur helped him cool off.

Collector was not too far behind.

"That was fun!" They exclaimed as they landed next to King, grabbing each of their pigtails and wringing them dry. "I'm glad Luz was right, and that trail did lead to a waterfall with normal water."

"Yeah, but now I'm tireeeed." King whined. His stomach grumbled, and he put a paw over it. "And hungry."

"You want me to carry you? Again?" Collector put their hands on their hips and raised an eyebrow.

King shook his head. "Nah. I do still want to get food, though."

"Okay, just say the word!" Collector began swirling his finger in the air, sparkles stirring around it, ready to conjure up anything.

"I was actually craving some Beast Killer's. Their burn-gers are the best around and we haven't had some in a while." King told him.

"Aw, okay." Collector removed their finger from the air, wagging it to dissipate the magic. "You wanna go to the Bonesborough place? That went pretty well last time."

King giggled. "Yeah, if you can call that well."

"Hey, it worked, didn't it?" Collector was already playing with some fake snails he had made appeared, throwing them and shuffling them around their hands.

"So what are we paying with this time? Snails? Tears? Screams?" They grinned devilishly at him.

King laughed. "Maybe this time we don't scare the staff half to death just to steal some fast food?"

"Boo. I know you had fun." Collector crossed their arms and pouted. "Besides, they don't even need the money, they're a megacorp, they're super wealthy!"

"I know, but scaring the poor overworked employees doesn't really add anything to that. We can steal ethically." King raised a claw.

Collector laughed. "You're such a weirdo. But okay, hmmm... how about we kidnap the employees later and give them lots of money for it afterwards? Then their bosses won't even get a cut and can't get mad at them!"

King laughed even louder. "What?! And I'm the weirdo?!"

"What! It's a good plan! I'm being nice I'm compromising!" Collector protested.

King tried to calm himself and finish laughing. "Fine, fine. That does sound kind of fun."

They walked some more until they reached the town, and looked for the restaurant.

Finally, they walked into the busy fast food joint, swinging open the doors and nearly knocking over the cardboard cutout of the restaurant's mascot, a grinning grey skinned demon dressed in leather garb and giving a thumbs up while holding up a skewer with a stabbed boar on its end.

"Hello, everyone! Good afternoon!" Collector announced, already holding up a star spinning around his fingers.

The entire restaurant turned to look at them, staff and costumers alike, trembling in place, not daring to move a muscle.

"Huh. They're already pretty antsy." King whispered to Collector.

"U-uhm, hello! Would you l-like a table?" A waiter finally showed up in front of them.

"How kind of you! Yes, please." Collector nodded happily.

They were walked to a pretty comfortable looking one, close to the window and with cushioned seats by the wall.

"And what would you like to e-eat?" The waiter asked.

King had glanced at the menu briefly, but already knew what he wanted: "The full roaring killer pack combo, please. Oh, and fairy acid, big bucket sized."

"Woah! That's a pretty big order, King." Collector commented raising an eyebrow.

"Hey, I told you I was hungry, dude." He side eyed them, then patted his belly. "I'm a growing titan, I need my nutrients."

"Alright, alright." Collector smiled and then turned to the waiter, holding the glowing star close to his face: "My friend here is pretty hungry, so please consider prioritizing his order."

"A-alright." The waiter gulped, backing away from the star that was held too close for comfort.

He turned to Collector: "Anything for you?"

"Hmmm. I don't need to eat but..." He took a look at the menu. "Could I get the swirling blood meteor shower ice cream dessert? It's so pretty!"

"You're not gonna pocket that to just freeze it and look at it forever like last time, right?" King asked him.

"Nah, I actually wanna eat this time. Wanna know what it tastes like. Consume it so the prettiness stays in me forever." Collector assured him.

"Is that why you're always trying to bite me?" King mumbled.

"What?" Collector asked.

"What?" King repeated.

"Anyway." Collector turned back to the waiter. "You don't have to rush mine, so worry about King's first, please."

"A-alright, right away!" The waiter nodded and soon rushed to tell the kitchen.

"And now we wait." Collector stretched their arms over the table and drummed on it a bit. "Hope yours doesn't take too long, big guy."

"Eh, it's fine." King wagged his tail at the term. "I don't think they're gonna dare take too long."

"Oh no, I should've told them to take care with your order..." Collector covered their mouth. "Then it won't be perfect!"

"Collector, it's a fast food joint. It's not supposed to be perfect, just good to fill your belly." King leaned back on the seat, arms tucked back.

"Hmm, alright, if you say so." Collector leaned back too.

A pause, King drummed his claws on the table making a clacking sound.

"Man, I smell like wet titan." Collector commented after a while.

"Oh, you smell like wet titan?" King repeated, huffing playfully.

"Yes, me." Collector responded. "You jumped right on top of me like five times! I remember your big titan butt pushing me down to the bottom."

"You were fiiiine. Besides, you were giggling the whole time!" King pointed out.

Collector broke out a small grin. "Never said I didn't like it. But I do smell like wet titan."

"And so do I. Or maybe I smell like wet collector." King smiled back.

"Okay, h-here's your roaring killer pack combo, and the fairy acid, sir." The waiter returned, barely being able to hold everything, relying on magic to keep the rest in the air.

"Ohhh." Collector clapped. "Look, King! It's all for you!"

King didn't respond, instead licking his fangs as an embarrassingly loud growl escaped his stomach and soon his own throat was making the noise, eyeing the food ferociously.

The waiter let out a shriek of fear seeing the huge titan react like that, and set the plates down and ran off.

Without much delay, King dug in, growling happily as he pushed it into his maw, taking pauses to delicately drink from the straw of his beverage.

Collector simply stared happily, getting splattered by some of the sauce flying in the titan's attack.

"Thith ith weally good!" King munched on a bone fragment, then stretched out a beast leg at him. "You want some?"

Collector shook his head, still smiling warmly. "Nah, I got my own order coming up."

"Suit yourfelff." King shrugged as he continued to chow down.

Collector watched for a bit longer, and eventually his order came to the table as well, the waiter as usual rather nervously setting it down.

"Ooooh! So pretty!" Collector had stars in his eyes, jumping up and down in his seat. "Almost looks too good to eat!"

"Collector." King scolded him. "You said you'd eat it."

"I am! Just admiring it, sheesh." Collector rolled his eyes and grabbed the spoon.

"Hey, wait." Collector called before the waiter left. "Could you get us the latest promotional toys, please? I want the Slobbering Dragon."

"Oh!" King stopped and wiped his mouth. "Can I get the Vampire Moth? I don't have that one yet."

"Ah, those only come with the kids meal promotion, sirs." The waiter tried to inform.

"Oh!" Collector grinned and snapped his fingers, summoning the star projectile again at his hand. "I think you misunderstood! We just want the toys, please."

"No, no, I understand! I'll get you those!" The waiter waved his hand in the air and then summoned the two toys as asked, and set them down on the table as well.

"Aw! He's so sleepy and drooly..." Collector grabbed his toy and squeezed it, the rubbery plastic dragon bulging the bubble that came out of its mouth at the pressure.

"Hey, Colly, check this out." King paused to try out his toy as well, putting his claws on top of the plastic moth and pressing.

The motion revealed pointy plastic fangs that erupted under its maw, while its eyes lit up red. "Raaaaagh!" It cried.

"Oh my stars, I love it!" Collector fawned over it too. "I'll have to get it next time."

"Can't you just make any you want, though?" King asked.

"Yeah, but it's not the same! I like getting these to collect properly." Collector explained, and finally popped a spoonful of ice cream into his mouth.

"I swear that toy shelf you have just keeps getting bigger." King shook his head and smiled, going back to finish his meal.

"Collector magic, baby! You should expect that." Collector grinned while digging around to catch more star sprinkles in his spoon.

After getting another spoonful in, he added: "Next time you come over, check out some of my duplicates. I could let you have some!"

"Hmm, do you have any plush ones?" King scratched his chin.

"Yeah, I got a few." Collector licked the spoon.

They fell silent again, until they finished their meals.

......................

The Beast Killer's employees woke up, remembering having only been at their shift while that terrifying star child that had once ripped up the Isles and the last living titan were at the restaurant.

They soon realized they had all been tied up and dropped at the back alley behind the establishment, struggling to get up and look around.

Soon, their kidnappers revealed themselves, stepping out of the shadows.

Oh... great. So those two finished eating.

"Hey, everyone! Great job!" Collector declared happily. "We were very satisfied with your service!"

"Uh, sorry about this, we'll let you go in a minute." King lifted up a paw in the air awkwardly.

"To thank you, and make sure your pesky bosses don't take your cut, we've decided to give you some prize money ourselves!" Collector continued, and winked. "That way, you got kidnapped, and whatever happened is not your fault."

They snapped their fingers and a mountain of snails rained on the staff, making them cry out in surprise and try to duck from the impact.

"Uhm, Colly, maybe it'd be better if they were in bags? Y'know, easier to carry?" King tugged on their coat.

"Ah. Good point." Collector snapped their fingers again, and the snails disappeared and then reappeared in small purple bags with stars on them, each in front of an employee.

"Well, you're free to go everyone! Bye, bye!" They clapped their hands, and the ropes binding the staff disappeared.

Immediately, they scrambled for their bags and ran off.

"Heh, what nice young witches." Collector put their hands on their hips, smiling and rolling their eyes.

"Well, are you heading home now?" King asked.

"Hm, yeah, probably. Need a lift to your place too?" Collector smiled and summoned their star board, now bigger to accommodate their larger teen selves.

"OK, but go slow, or that roaring beast will come back to haunt you." King told him.

They looked at each other and both laughed, then got on the star and started on their way home.

#the owl house #the collector #king clawthorne #toh collector #platinum bones #toh fanfic #Commander's orders #art

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mymariahcarey · 1 year

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@landofsonlali mentioned “i want a fic and/or art where steve and robin go through a series of jobs that all have terrible costumes. they have the scoops costumes, the elves, maybe they have to dress up as mascots for some fast food chain. i just want them to be forced into ridiculous costumes for all their jobs 😆” and I decided to run with this at 8am.

It’s a decade of different uniforms. Scoops and the family video vests were just the beginning. Steve and Robin worked at family video together until Robin went of to [insert big city] for college, Steve (and Eddie) in tow.

They work at a sandwich shop for a while, the hats an obnoxious caricature of a giant sub sandwich. Then a 50s diner which does wonders for Robin’s dating life, the attire suiting her extremely well as she leans into the more masc fashion of the era. (It’s also annoying does wonders for Steve and Eddie’s sex life, but she tried not to think about that). Then there was the Holiday season of 89 where they’d both taken second jobs as Mall Elves. (She still get quesey at the smell of peppermint. She’d had to switch toothpaste flavors after that one.)

After that it’s a rotating door of book store (another vest), hot dog shop (another hat added to the pile, and a very short stint as children entertainers (giant mascot costumes they’ve shoved into the front hall closet of their duplex).

But eventually she finishes school (and Steve does too) and they don’t get to work together anymore. There was a brief period of time when they wondered if to be ‘successful’ adults they’d need to also not live together.

After assurances from both Eddie and Nance (who Robin started dating around the time her and Steve were dressed as aforementioned furries) that no one was really all that interested in splitting up, she and Steve both relaxed. Because while they have their respective partners, their connection it far too deep to not be working together AND living together.

Eventually, around the late 90s they’ve saved up enough money to move into a bigger house, a house that lets them feel like they live together but gives them enough privacy that Robin doesn’t have to worry about walking in on something she’d rather *not* walk in on.

The uniforms sit in a hall closet alongside a bat and metal trash can lid with nails hammered through and an actual safe for Nancy’s fire arms, and a boom box preloaded and with very specific list of songs.

#steddie #stranger things #steve harrington #eddie munson #robin buckley #scoops troop #Robin pov #platonic soulmates #with a capital p

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