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#Im only kind of sorry
amygdalae · 1 year
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its interesting to me how self-deprecation neatly ties into making others feel bad. like. if you constantly assume that you’re stupid no matter how informed or skilled in a topic you might be, people who are a bit less learned or skilled than you might see how you, someone who is obviously skilled, talk down about yourself, and assume that if you think YOURE an idiot you must think theyre an even bigger idiot and lose confidence or find you intimidating as a result. its fucked up. and its part of why it can be so important to break out of cycles of self-hatred--not just for yourself, but for people around you
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inkskinned · 8 months
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he says i hate everyone except you and that is addictive and that is kind of romantic and beautiful because you're young and you're kind of a sarcastic asshole too and you don't like bad boys, per say, but you don't really like good ones either. and you like that you were the exception, it felt like winning.
except life is not a romance book, and he was kind of being honest. he doesn't learn to be nice to your friends. he only tolerates your family. you have to beg him to come with you to birthday parties, he complains the whole time. you want to go on a date but - people are often there, wherever you're going. he's just so angry. about everything, is the thing. in the romance book, doesn't he eventually soften? can't you teach him, through your own sense of whimsy and comfort?
at first - you know introverts often need smaller friend groups, and honestly, you're fine staying at home too. you like the small, tidy life you occupy. you're not going to punish him for his personality type.
except: he really does hate everyone but you. which means he doesn't get along with his therapist. which means he has no one to talk to except for you. which means you take care of him constantly, since he otherwise has no one. which means you sometimes have to apologize for him. which means he keeps you home from seeing your friends because he hates them. you're the single exception.
about a decade from this experience, you'll type into google: how to know if a relationship is codependent.
he wraps an arm around you. i hate everyone except you. these days, you're learning what he's actually confessing is i have very little practice being kind.
#i used to think it was romantic too and then i was like. now i see it as a HUGE red flag#writeblr#it is also almost EXCLUSIVELY said by immature ppl who think this is normal#fyi even if u think it's funny and ur like 'im an introvert it's just TRUE' like. you need therapy (ily tho)#healed introversion is just ''i would prefer to be by myself'' not ''i hate every person'' ... hate is not normal. that is not healthy#im sorry. i know it feels accurate. but if you're walking around with that kind of rage....#1. you're making a LOT of assumptions about every single person u have ever met. which is often unfair and unkind#and also usually involves judging people based on their worst moments or little mistakes#2. you are being unfair to the person who is ur ''exception''#3. there is a VAST difference between ''ur my favorite person'' and ''the ONLY person i like.''#idk i think this is just a personal bias thing tbh#im sure there are people who have this experience normally#but i have YET to find a man who thinks like this and ISNT absolute DOGSHIT. although tbh.... like. im sure he exists#when u hit like 30 some of the things that were once kind of hot now just sound fucking exhausting. like ''im in a band''#edit in the tags: i used to kind of be like this too. but the thing is that like. my life became so much more peaceful#once i started believing that people are generally good. like yes i am mad at the world at large#but it's just.... a very hard way to live. you're not a bad person or wrong for the ways other people hurt you and taught you to be angry.#but that anger will continue to hurt YOU. it will punish YOU. it will prevent YOU from making new deep connections. it will protect you yes#but it will also cause MASSIVE blowback. bc if you lose the One Person... your life will fall apart. i know this personally.#i really recommend just trying to be... cautiously optimistic instead. like. yes#people can be horrible and cruel and there are some communities (incels for example) that aren't worth that optimism#but i think like... most people will hold a door for you . most people want to help you find your wallet .#i hope one day you are able to find peace. i hope that rage eventually smooths over. i know how hard it is PERSONALLY#and i know what must have happened to you. and im deeply deeply sorry we share the same wound.#but i promise - sometimes we all need someone else to help us carry the weight. eventually the rage has to die so that we can let help in#i had to spend years biting at outstretched hands. i still often do. im still very wary . and my heart breaks that you flinch too.#here's the thing: i don't blame you. but we were both acting out of fear and pain. .... not out of healthy behavior. and ... change#was needed. i needed change too. rage was useful for a while. then it just left me isolated and bitter. i had to (with effort)#choose to let that rage go. and let people in . VERY SLOWLY THO LOL
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side-of-honey · 2 months
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oujwuaguihs help,,,the yellow,...
Have some designs + headcanons for these 2 cough cough
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sorrelpaws · 7 months
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no offense but i genuinely fear that their potential dynamic will go severely underutilized
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naturecalls111 · 6 months
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Me, consuming any other media ever: how can I make this about zosan
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antiparticular · 27 days
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I feel like people hcing tmagp gerry as being pastel goth have completely missed the point. the point is that you don't have to dress colourfully to be happy. dressing in black ≠ depressed. and he was never goth !!!!!!! I'm sorry I keep saying it but it's true. he was never goth he's a metalhead and he still dresses the exact same.
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kingjasnah · 4 months
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wait is it the row anniversary? wow. happy three years to UNETHICAL YURI and KALADIN i guess
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itsgrimeytime · 8 months
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bite marks || rick grimes x f!reader
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based off: anon request and Hot Gum by SOFIA ISELLA
Summary: That night was a nightmare, with blood spilled and threats to your group's lives. You weren't sure that everyone could recover from it, including yourself. What Rick did had to be done, there was no other choice. You knew that. So, why did it keep replaying in your head? And why did you like it?
TWS: NSFW mdni (18+), teasing, fingering, oral (fem receiving), body worship, a little degradation, hint of blood kink, hickeys, biting, dom/sub undertones, possessiveness, oral fixation, overstimulation, hint of pain kink, begging, unhinged!Rick, murder jacket!Rick, death mention, gore, violence, all things typical of TWD.
[[A/N: hello anon!!! Thank you so much for being my first request, it means a lot <3. I will say this will be my first ever smut, so please don't judge me or I'll cry. You know that tag on AO3 'porn without plot'? This is the exact opposite. This baby has so much fondness and plot and slow-burn energy that I didn't mean to give it. I hope you enjoy !!! ]]
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The night was quiet, the low buzz of adrenaline dipping beneath the stars -there was no need to fight anymore. All your senses heightened, rest felt a bit like an uncomfortable itch under your skin -something you couldn't stand to do.
Eyes flickering like an animal in the night to any particular noises, you were positive that getting a wink of sleep was definitely out of the cards. At least for now.
Plus, there was the thing.
The heavy tension that hung over your group like a dark cloud -the gnashing of teeth, the spitting of blood. The instinctual movements, nothing behind his eyes but heavy anger, beyond anything you'd ever seen. It was like a predator, instinctively stalking its prey without remorse, without thought, just... just to survive.
Your head was spinning.
Eyes flickering to your side, you watched him. He wasn't asleep, you could tell -leaned up against the car with a stare of a thousand yards. Part of you wanted to talk to him, try and help him find some solace -reiterate it was the only option, he did what he had to-
'He's mine,' the low growl made you freeze -eyes glazing over in a way they hadn't in a while as you sought to catch Rick in his rage-
But the other half was... conflicted.
Very, very conflicted.
Sighing, you squeezed your hands together -trying to turn over the event in your mind and just move past it. You knew that Rick would hardly want to talk about it, nevertheless your...
It wasn't the time for those kinds of thoughts, despite them clawing up your throat -mere ideas of 'what if he was that protective over me?' or what it would feel like to have his mouth on your pulse point. When you know he could so easily take a drag of the teeth and-
You cleared your throat, turning your attention instead to the night sky -trying to cool down and clear your head. Of everything.
"Can't sleep?" He rumbled out, a sort of sleepy fondness in his tone rather than the biting rage from before-
It was going to be a long night.
You took a deep breath, dragging your eyes down from the stars -despite your better judgment. Always eager to feel the little humanity left in the world, you looked to him -his face was still covered in red but his eyes were much more attentive.
Focused.
"Nope," you answered, finally, voice shaking just slight enough for him to notice, "-it's hard to explain."
Rick seemed to gesture at his face, blood still encrusted on the skin (desperation to protect what was his-) leveling, "Try me."
You bit at your lip, hoping somewhere far off in your head that the night hid your face enough to excuse the redness, "I just. I feel like I should be doing more. Or even just anything at all. I'm... I'm restless."
"Hmm," he mumbled out, deep tone rattling something up your spine, "-I'm kinda the opposite. But I just... I can't rest."
There was something in the tone that wildly grounded you to the very current moment -Rick was distraught, worried. He believed he'd failed, you could just tell. He believed he'd done something past the line, and lost his humanity. His empathy. And in this world, it's the first step of a downward spiral.
With extra careful movements, to not wake those around you, you made your way across many of your group. They were all asleep, but still, somehow all connected -holding each other like it's the last thing they'd ever do. You made it to a spot beside him, setting an appropriate distance, you leaned against the car with a manufactured ease.
"What if I stayed up?" You asked, genuinely -eyes upturned to the sky (you couldn't look him in the eyes so close, you didn't want to risk it.)
Rick stilled beside you, you could feel him freeze -it almost made you itch to reach out for him, but you cut the thought short, "I can't ask ya to do 'at, Y/N."
"You didn't ask me, I offered," you started, looking at him before dashing away to the dwindling fire. It had been made with some extra supplies that had been packed up. It was a little but it went a long way. Looking back to the pile that had accumulated nearby, you assessed -it was mostly extras of things you didn't need so much of. Books, copy paper, twigs, some extra diapers from one of Judith's emergency packed bags-
You paused, her emergency bags...
"But," you responded, quickly standing, "-I think I have something that can help, anyway."
Digging around into some of the supplies, you had your eyes set on one thing. You knew it was there -you had packed it yourself. It was a lucky run, a store almost completely in stock and unaffected to the outside.
Finally, the package peaked up at you -pastels and what seemed to be baby zoo animals scattered along the plastic smiling. You grinned, a bit proud of yourself for finding them so-
"Baby wipes?"
Something in your stomach twisted at the grumble of 'baby' smoothing across his lips, but you pushed it down, "Don't sound so judgmental, Grimes, hear me out first."
He smiled, it was light -you imagined the smallest gust of air might shoo it away but you still counted it, "Okay, okay. I'm listenin'."
You pursed your lips, before cementing your tone -seriousness embedded in the fiber of your being, "For your face, I think... I think it might help if you cleaned up.
Rick softened, the smile growing into something more fond. The crow feet by his eyes making the lightest of an appearance, and you had the instinct to trace them for a moment -before shaking your head to clear the train of thought.
"You know," he smirked in the teasing kind of way he always did, "-if you wanted to touch my face you coulda just said so-"
You scoffed -trying to hide the blooming pink on your face and clear your mind of being so close, "Oh, fuck you, Grimes, do it yourself."
And you threw the package at his head, right at the grin that made your head spin in a new kind of way. Those teeth had-
You could handle this, right? Just give it a few days.
A few weeks, actually.
Or maybe a month.
You were trying, genuinely, to deal with it -if you could pinpoint exactly what it was, you could avoid it. So, you started testing things from a distance.
Trying to talk to him up close, was a no. All you could think about was his mouth, salt and pepper stubble stretched across his lips, and the low grumble of his voice-
No. Couldn't work.
So, you tried sitting farther away. Watching from a distance, and talking from a distance, if he noticed it, he didn't say anything. That one couldn't work either though, as you watched his hands (long, calloused fingers and palms that had surely-) flip through the pages -apparently, it was a log of everything the camp had left. Not that you had noticed at all.
And then, trying and trying again, you found Alexandria. A beautiful place with open doors, food, and shelter. You couldn't remember the last time you slept on a mattress, or had your own kitchen-
It was bliss, other than some paranoia here and there -mistrust bubbling up in the community, you'd found yourself comfortable there. And then, you'd unexpectedly gone to the Grimes house -urgently needing to pass on some news, you couldn't remember what now, or who, or anything about it really. He'd opened the door clean-shaven and shirtless, you couldn't get out of there fast enough.
Your solution was a simple one, just avoid the problem at all costs -going on any and every run offered to you (as long as Rick wasn't going, and with the new responsibilities of Alexandria, he hardly was), keeping conversations quick and short, and trying desperately hard to keep Rick far, far away from you.
And thinking back on it, maybe that's where it went wrong.
It was late, you knew that much. You didn't know exactly how late -your head just wouldn't stop, and you'd scampered out of bed before you could even look at some of the clocks -if they were even set properly.
You'd decided to go out on your porch, and watch the stars -they kind of felt like the only thing that was the same these days. You could remember stargazing from meadows when you were young, your parents pointing to the constellations they knew, and you eager to see any kind of shooting star.
Something was comforting about knowing it was the same sky, even though it felt so different. And you, you were so different.
"We gotta stop meetin' like this," he hummed, dragging your attention from the sky to himself -leaning out on the railing of his own porch. Almost like he was trying to bridge the gap from your house to his.
You laughed, at ease with the distance between the two of you (despite your eyes catching on his light t-shirt and plaid pants that hung a little too low), correcting, "You should, you have things to do in the morning, I, on the other hand, can sleep until the sun sets again. You're just being irresponsible."
Rick laughed, shaking his head -your eyes followed the movement, "Ain't you helpin' cook for the dinner party tomorrow?"
Oh, you realized before responding, "That's at like 5 pm, gives me plenty of time to-"
"Carol gets up at like 6 to gather everythin' up."
You fell silent, before commenting -a bit in exaggeration but still real, you hadn't slept this good in years, "Then, no, I am not helping."
He only laughed more, and something in your stomach swirled. It wasn't new. Nothing with Rick was new. You'd always known he was handsome (even under the sweat and the dirt this world brought), and seeing him so gentle with his kids... It was expected when your heart started up at the reigns.
"I missed this," he said suddenly, open and vulnerable -Rick had a way of just doing that. You could only envy it.
You played dumb, actively ignoring it -you knew you'd hurt him, and you didn't want to think about it, "Missed what?"
"You," he answered -simply, honestly, "-talkin' to you. You don't-"
Rick stopped, sighing somewhere deep in his chest and pinching the bridge of his nose -your gut twisted in guilt, "Look... can we talk? Inside?"
You stilled, your head spinning in the sort of way that always somewhat meant to get away, you hadn't sorted it all out yet. And he knew something was up, he was going to ask-
Your mouth moved before you could coach what to say, "What about Judith?"
He paused, the frown on his face brief but still settled there -careful and considerate, "We can talk in yours, if you're more comfortable with that."
Your first instinct, a strong instinct that had never led you wrong, said no. It would be too much, and you'd ruin the friendship you had with Rick if he figured any of this out. ANY of it. But your second instinct was softer, it knew Rick well. It could tell he was hurt by something you'd done -you could imagine what, and he wanted to fix it. Hell, he just wanted to talk.
"Yeah," you answered -hands a little too tight on the railing, voice screaming in your head, "-we can do that."
The next few minutes, your heart was pounding in your chest -loud and boisterous as you went into your home. Rick would be following close behind, you thought to yourself -distantly. Barely there, you spun into the kitchen, urging somewhere deep in your mind to get a barrier. A wall between him and you, something to do with your hands instead of-
"Can I get you some water?" You asked, clearing your throat and shifting your footing -not now, not now, not now.
Rick was tall, practically owning every room he came into -a presence larger than life. You'd always noticed that, really, he'd had just a powerful energy, one that you could feel as soon as he stepped into a room. It was a shift in the air, enough for your breath to slink out of your lungs-
"Yeah," he answered -oblivious to your own head, "-if ya don't mind."
He was close, naturally so, a tick to your right between the counters -waiting patiently. You instinctively swayed further to the left, the bristling feeling of his body heat making your head spin -a dizzy sort of intoxicating drift of his woodsy scent echoing into your nose-
Without thinking, you dropped the cup to the floor -shattered on the tile.
"Shit, Y/N-" Rick remarked, crouching down to the tile, using one of his hands to push your hip back (you almost couldn't breathe), "-ya got a broom?"
"Yeah, yeah," you swallowed, voice strained and head still dizzyingly spun, "-should be one in the closet in the hallway."
Just before he turned to go and get it, his eyes settled on you -slinking over your stiffened posture and the tone of your voice, "Are you... Everythin' okay?"
"What? Yeah," you tried to laugh -it came out pretty pathetic, "-why? Uh, why do you ask?"
Rick stepped forward -hand reaching to soothe, and you instinctively stepped back. Shit.
He frowned, something glazing over his eyes, and a twist of guilt settling itself deep in your stomach like a stone in a pond. His hand extended into empty air, he gently brought it back to himself -a flash of something deep in his eyes and frown only growing larger.
"This..." he sighed -trailing off into a quiet tone, "-this is what I wanted to talk 'bout. Mind if we go somewhere else? I'll clean up the glass later-"
"We can," you agreed -voice a little squeaky, and you barely let it stand in the moment's silence. Quickly, turning off into the living room, not waiting for him -you were running on self-preservation at this point. Your heart beating quickly in your chest, you kept your mind sane, calm, together-
You sat on the couch -not daring to uncross your legs. The sort of twist in your stomach was much different now, pillowing back and forth like a tidal wave.
"You can't even look at me," he echoed, voice distant -despite him standing off to the right of you, pacing, "-I just. I know you've been actin' weird since the run-in with the Claimers-"
You stilled -teeth gnashing, the thrum of his deep voice, the tightening of his jaw, the protectiveness in every line of his body, "Can we not talk about that?"
Rick paused, attention back on you -curious, confused, and heartbroken, "Look, I kno' that I lost it a lil' that day and I'm sure it was scary, but-"
"Rick, no, not-" you suddenly echoed, standing and approaching him on instinct -to comfort, to soothe, "-you did everything right that day. There weren't many options, and you did what you had to."
"But I scared ya. I know you're afraid of me-"
"Rick-" you started, desperate to explain, to get the pain out of his tone.
"You just have to know," he echoed, continuing as if you'd never even spoken -hands trailing to hold your arms, comforting, soothing but your brain only lit up at feeling, "-I would never hurt you."
"Rick-" you relented, sighing deep in your bones -air flushing out of your lungs, "-fuck, it's not... It's not that."
He stilled, eyes wavering over you in concern (sweet, your mind commented) "What's wrong then? You can't just avoid me an' not tell me, what's wrong. I'm done with 'at."
"Ugh," you groaned -the words not willing to come out of your lips, shimmying out of his hold and taking a few steps back, "-It's embarrassing."
"Embarrassin'? What are you talkin' about?"
"Fuck, I don't-" you ran a hand through your hair -frantic, and talking to yourself, "-maybe if I just come out and say it?"
"Y/N..." he started, roaming closer -trying to reach out and stop the pacing, help you, "-ya know you can tell me anything."
"God, you're not making this easy, you know?"
Rick furrowed his eyebrows, trying to catch your eyebrow -desperate, hurting, "Makin' it easy? Y/N just talk to me-"
And maybe it was because he had caught your eyes, even for just a second -blue desperate, pleading. He just wanted to fix it. Or maybe it was because your patience had worn thin, you were sick of hiding it-
Either way, it just came out.
"Fuck, I was into it."
The silence was deafening, as you tried to hide behind your palms -cheeks burning a furious red. But you couldn't stop it.
"So, no," you clarified, clearing your throat, "-I am not scared of you. At all. And I'd really appreciate it if we didn't talk about it."
Rick spoke, and you weren't looking at him but you could hear something there -low in his voice, "Speak for yourself."
Stilling, you turned to match him -finding something you knew in him, something instinctual, "What...?"
"What part?" he asked, leaning into your space -hand skipping up your side, fingers brushing up your skin, "Was it the anger? The blood?"
"Rick," you breathed out, breathless -heart racing against your chest, "-you don't have to."
He didn't respond immediately, fingertips dragging up agonizingly -your shirt riding up just slightly at the pressure. The hand ended up on your chin, holding it with his thumb and leveling his eyes with yours -and the heat that echoed through your skin seemed so suffocating. You felt like every part of your body was molten -your stomach twisting into something far different than guilt.
"Darlin', this ain't a chore."
"Rick-" you exhaled, tension thick as your eyes flicked between his and down to his lips. They were so close-
He sighed, pushing ever so slightly more into your chin, other hand riding up under your shirt -fingertips dancingly along your ribs, "Maybe I was thinkin' about this all wrong, hmm?"
You tried to speak, but he cut you to the chase -all low voice and you could feel his breath on your skin. Some part of you relished in the warmth, sensations dancing behind your eyes as all you could do was watch.
"I think," he moved even closer, your breaths mingling and head spinning -your legs weak and brain turning to a familiar buzz, "-I think y'er favorite part was my mouth."
A breath caught in your chest, held up simply by his hands -your knees buckled but all you wanted was to feel them, eyes dipping to his lips like it would change something, "Rick, please-"
"Please what, darlin'?"
"Kiss me," you echoed -instinctual.
He didn't hesitate, sweeping forward to connect his lips to yours -fast and it lit a fire somewhere in your stomach. And despite the rush, he'd been languid -trailing his hands up to the sides of your face. Big palms holding you still, lips chapped and the brush of his stubble leaving something so buzzed there.
He licked along your teeth, pushing you back into the wall with a force that made your head spin. You startled briefly from the impact, and he pulled back -tilting your chin to the side with one hand. Calloused fingertips leaving something burning there in their place, you didn't think you could speak-
"God," he nosed around your neck -pointedly close to the vein, and all you could do was whine, "-so pretty like this."
You groaned, hands splaying across his shoulders -feeling along the muscle there (god, you wanted to see), "Off, Rick-"
"You first," he echoed, hands trailing down to the hem of your shirt -tugging up. His fingers brushed across your skin there, and something in you weakened -you threw your arms up and he guided the fabric off. Big hands following it all the way up, he left a trail of goosebumps behind -as you tried to grab at the buttons of his flannel.
Mindlessly grabbing at the fabric, he merely chuckled.
"Patience, sweetheart," he hummed trailing his fingers along your skin -down to the band of your pants, hands dusting under them, "-let's focus on you for now, yeah?"
Breathless, you responded, "O-Okay."
"Good," he mumbled, leaning down without a breath of hesitance -mouthing along your jaw. Kiss after kiss after kiss, his tongue traced down your shoulder -avoiding your neck, particularly. Lips meshed with your skin, you reached up and grabbed some of his hair -thick curls between your fingers, he grunted against your skin.
"Please," you echoed, bubbling up from your throat -his teeth scrapping back up to your collarbone. He traced the bone, biting onto it -gentle and still something so desperate. You leaned your head back against the wall -moaning slipping through your lips through every drag of his tongue.
"That what you want?" he echoed between pressing kisses over your chest -tantalizingly close, "Wanna be all marked up? All mine?"
"All yours," you repeated -the thrum of his voice echoing off your skin, "-all yours."
"Hmm," he muttered pressing a finger to your neck, rubbing gently over your jugular -teetering over the area, "-gotta do it where 'ey can see then, don't I?"
"Yes. yes-" you begged, hands desperate all over his chest, "-please. I want them to see."
Rick grinned, nosing along your jaw -puffs of breath against your skin that made your head spin. Buzzing through your senses, you could feel everywhere he touched you -one hand rubbing along your hip, calloused thumb, and the burn of his hot breaths dissipating along your skin.
And then he finally leaned forward.
"Rick," you moaned, arching into him, as his lips latched onto the vein -taking the skin between his teeth, "-Rick, I can't-"
He only tugged, and your eyes rolled back at the spark of pain there. Teeth grazing, it left a pleasant sort of burn -as he held your head still, kissing along the spot with his lips desperately. Like he wanted all of you. Like he needed all of you.
Rick pulled back with one last languid kiss, tugging at the waistband of your pants, "Off, take these off-"
You were compliant, tugging them down with a quick motion and kicking them off your feet -vulnerable but your mind was in such a haze, you hardly noticed it.
"Beautiful," he hummed, hands dancing along your waist -trailing along your underwear, teasing, "-so beautiful, darlin'."
"More, Rick, please-"
He mouthed around your collarbone and you gasped at the sensitivity -the biting air brushing over his marks, they were so fresh. Only moving down your skin, through the dips and crevices, and your head only lit up with a rush of crimson -eyes bleary with pleasure. He focused in between your chest, leaving traces all along your skin -a beautiful dark path of bruises.
And then his fingers brushed across the fabric -timid and teasing. You groaned, rubbing onto his fingers, "Rick-"
He grunted, moving his hands swiftly to tug them down -rushed and desperate and instinctual. Your head spun as his breaths centered across your core -overwhelmed by the tension, you could not imagine you would last long.
Fingers brushing across your clit, your knees nearly buckled -a blinding bright flashing behind your eyes.
"Hey, hey," he spoke, looking up at you (big blues eyes a mere breath from the most sensitive part of your body) -keeping one hand on your hip, extra support, "-stay with me, sweetheart. Gotta remember this, so you know who treats you best, knows how to care of you, knows what you need-"
"You," you answered, breathlessly, "-you, only you."
He pressed a kiss to your inner thigh -gentle, sensitive skin making your whole body tense, "That's right, all mine."
His fingers trailing along your folds -calloused and gathering your wetness in smooth, slow, movements. Careful and gentle at a time when you were desperate, squirming, and whining -your hand thread deeply into his hair. A tinge in your heart at the fact he still wanted to be careful with you was overwhelmed by the need to have him there now. You didn't care if it was his finger, or his tongue-
He trailed along your core, teasing -blue eyes intent on your face watching every flicker there, every gasp. Before he pressed forward.
The slow sink of his finger made your eyes roll to the back of your head, a deep throaty moan pushing through you -loud. Rick's pupils were blown now, watching you squirm on his middle finger -twisting and grinding. He licked a long strip over your clit, and your head smacked against the wood -placing your free hand over your mouth, biting back the shrill moan you were sure was going to spill out.
Rick only quickened the pace, finger twisting in and out before it became two and your stomach tightened. Lips sucking relentlessly at your clit -teeth grazing across the sensitive skin, you used your hand in his hair to pull him closer (more, more, more). Words blabbering past your lips, broken and pleading, he only pushed harder, faster.
"I can't-" your voice shook, "-Rick, I-"
He merely kissed your clit, languid and slow and teasing, while his fingers kept up the pace -pounding against your skin so quickly it made you delirious. Head spinning and moans breaking out of your lips, every sensation felt so close. So close. So close-
And then you were shaking, bright lights flashing behind your eyes -squirming for any sort of more friction as it all built and flushed through your body. Pushing into his mouth and clenching his fingers, you felt your muscles spasm -eyes fluttering closed at the mere sensation of it all.
"Fuck," he grumbled out -pupils wide and watching your every move, finding his own finish, "-so pretty, so beautiful."
And before you could say a word, he pressed a gentle kiss on your lips -domestic, caring, tender. Grabbing the fabric of your nearby shirt and cleaning up, all his movement slow and caring -blue eyes flooding over your features like you were precious.
"I liked that shirt," you pouted, exhaustion biting at your tone and aching in your body but pushing past it to shove him gently. More like the press of a hand
Rick laughed -voice soft and a deep note of tired, "You can borrow mine if 'at makes ya feel better, sweetheart."
"Are you staying?"
"'Course, baby," he paused, eyeing you in that special kind of way except he was fond now -a beautiful, wonderful fond, and pushing back a loose strand of your hair, "-but, we should stay at mine, in case Jude wakes up. You okay with 'at?"
"Of course," you responded, teetering in place and leaning into his hand heavily.
He chuckled, trailing over the skin of your cheek, "So cute like this, darlin'."
You blushed, despite being in the situation you were in, he had just-
You cleared your throat, and wiped at your face like it would go away -playfully, "Oh fuck you, Grimes."
"Next time," he hummed, as natural as he could, before pulling you up -his rough hands in yours and smushing you into his side, "-Let's get you dressed, hmm?"
"Okay," you muttered, tucking yourself neater into his side.
And you thought for a second, that maybe it would all be okay. Maybe this could work.
You could at least hope it would.
And then, he leaned down and kissed your temple -a crinkly eyed smile aimed right at you, soft, domestic, caring... affectionate.
It could work, you decided -eyes laid hazily on him and everything he was, it could definitely work.
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radiocity · 6 months
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The L Word | S2E01
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queer-lovebot · 5 months
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The Sunshine Court is either going tk have Kevin and Jean talking and commiserating with each other about their Nest abuse OR have Jean thinking fondly about Kevin but never contacting him again. He becomes a new ghost for Jean to make peace with.
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veveisveryuncool · 5 months
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didn't feel like doing another sad taranza scene so here's some angsty designs for mirror counterparts of other characters :D
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kirbytober day 19: tears/mirror
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cherrytraveller · 5 months
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sorry that i've deprived you all of a wip preview, anyway; deity-fies your local bad future mystic magic nuke
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krasytoonz · 4 months
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Everytime I secretly ship something from a fandom I feel like I’m coming out of the closet whenever my finger hovers on the ‘Post’ button.
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motherdanger · 5 months
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Angel of Mercy
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atthebell · 2 months
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i am very happy about all the posts circulating about being aware of cultural differences and i think it makes a lot of sense considering none of these streamers will speak english and will have very different cultural touchstones but it is kind of funny to me how little people discussed this previously when we already did have incredibly different cultural communication styles and contexts on the server like. the amount of times things have had to be explained or people have gotten pissed off because someone was "too loud"/"too aggressive"/"too indirect" or whatever is kind of ridiculous.
like again im very glad and i hope this means they're continuing to learn and see what does and doesn't work however from the fandom side of things im seeing people rb things and im like okay so when it's east vs. west that's easy for you to understand that there's differences but when it's europe vs. latam it's not. interesting. wonder if rampant orientalism has anything to do with that.
anyway im not trying to be like a self-righteous dick about this and i want people to be kind and think the best of people without leaping to conclusions i just wish people had given more grace in previous situations of conflicting cultural elements and i hope everyone is better going forward
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