#ITS JUST SO.... AGHHHHHHHHH | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

cospinol · 2 years

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aghhhhhhhhh, sei and hyou in today’s episode..

This is just a couple of seconds at the end of the episode, but it’s the most significant part of sei’s speech to me because I’m still to this day irreparably torn up abt literally the inciting incident from the first chapter of the series (shou bun kun still hasn’t adequately apologized or atoned in my eyes lol). Shin thinks about hyou relatively often (usually in fist of the north star style power of love victory scenes aka my favourite thing about this series), but a scene like this where sei independently remembers and recognizes his sacrifice is much rarer and very special to me… ｡ﾟ･ (╯﹏╰) ･ﾟ｡

Another part of the reason I like this bit so much is that its role in the story sei is telling us is 1) as an acknowledgement by sei that hyou is the most important person to shin, while then 2) leading directly into sei’s thoughts of shin, which is the core and end-point of his reflections on the love and kindness of other people - to me this sequence is really essentially sei acknowledging that shin is the most important person to him lol. There are other factors at play, of course, but during duke juuteki’s scene earlier in the episode I was thinking about how shin’s refutation to opponents who have been truly, seriously wronged by qin is always ‘the cycle is going to break because sei can break it’; sei here, against his own ultimate rhetorical opponent, ultimately relies on ‘I know the cycle can break, because I saw shin break it’………………… ahh. Ahh

I’ve always really loved ryo fui’s response being Being Overwhelmed By Sei’s Brilliance, not in a the sense that he’s actually overcome or convinced but instead just kind of shakes his head and has to acknowledge that they are talking so completely past each other that his arguments will never come close to harming the radiance of sei’s dream, the way even though he’s so obviously lost it’s in a condescending way (sei’s ideal is so pure it still seems childish to him, even though it’s its purity that makes it so strong); for all that ryo fui’s been litigating the nature of the world below heaven & dissecting human nature, all of his paths lead back to maximizing tangible prosperity, while sei’s anecdotes and personal appeals are entirely for the sake of the dream for the dream’s sake. He’s aiming somewhere so much higher than anyone else…… it’s also interesting to watch ryo fui back down at the point he does while contemplating sei’s recent embarrassing loss to kan ki, a king of a warring state who’s willing to rule thru martial might huh

Also, with that fundamental divide in their positions in mind — ryo fui pushing sei the way he does is extremely funny, love the fact that he sets up sei’s finishing-move point by just going ‘okay, tell me about kantan if you think people are so good’. But it’s fitting that he’s the one challenger who’s made sei start seeing the ghosts of chou hei again, the one obstacle so apparently insurmountable that he nearly shakes sei’s faith in human nature again, and requires the kind of spiritual intervention he gets…

I will say, before today’s episode I actually wasn’t sure that it *was* shi ka speaking to sei through the purple light, but I’m glad the anime cleared it up by bringing in sayaka ohara for those lines :) and wonderful to hear her in the shi ka flashback again!

I’m glad we got some full sequences of her story here, too (in the manga we get an even more truncated version with no dialogue), because my impression of it in the anime is mostly of its very random placement between ri boku’s court visit and the start of sanyou, where it mostly felt like a distraction (obviously displaced from its more fitting location earlier in the manga), which was a shame because I love shi ka herself as a character so much. But we got to see lots of scenes of her in the current art style here so that’s a win :)

And last but not least. Rui was even prettier than usual today 🥰🥰🥰💘💘💘

#lotta sei talk today!! but it checks out because my favourite thing about him is how much he loves shin &that’s what this ep was about to me #but also I’m a bad person so my actual actual favourite aspect of their dynamic is #‘sei knows he’s going to spend the rest of his life getting emotionally ntr’d by a dead 12-y/o’#and that’s what this episode was really Really about. to me. lol #txt #kingdomposting #it’s still interesting to me that the debate at the end of eikyuu wasn’t framed as sei’s loss tbh #even though it *does* logically fit with what he’s saying here #it’s hard for me to believe that his takeaway there was anything other than a) him realizing kan ki’s men would kill him if he attempted #*any kind of disciplinary action against them there #&then also b) that the legacy of qin is built on men like haku ki and in practice achieving his dream DOES mean endorsing Chou Hei But Worse #like what that scene was to me was kan ki going ‘you can’t fire me’ and sei realizing he’s right and leaving #and his line about being convinced by maron’s argumwnt really did feel like he was just saving face to walk away #curious to see how we’ll see him come to terms with this in the future. especially if kan ki does win in northern zhao

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tr0ubl3d-tr4n53nd3r · 7 months

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i dont really know much about american girl dolls but i think theyre really cool! do you think you could tell me about your favorite one?

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! YES YES YESSSSSSS! IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS AGHHHHHHHHH OMG OMG OMG.

Okay um... I didn't just do that. Fr fr. No I'm cool.

Okay... who do I infodump about? I read Caroline Abbott, cécile Ray, and Marie Grace Gardener's books growing up, but I own Kit and Maryellen.

I think imma go with Kit Kittridge, from 1930's Cincinnati, Ohio

OKAY SO. I NEVER READ ANY BOOKS PAST MEET SO I REALLY DONT KNOW TOO MUCH BUT I WATCHED THE MOVIE SO...

her meet outfit looks like this

"Shes (not) a faking lying blone schemer and her name isn't Kit... ITS MARGRET"

Had to throw a total drama reference in there, but it's true. Her real name is Margaret Mildred Kittridge. She was named after her mom and like... grandma, but like she wasn't her grandma? Idk it's hard to explain. I know what I mean so I guess it works. She got the name Kit because when she was a kid her father sang this song that went like "pack up your troubles in your old kit bag" and kit loved it so she would always say "dad! Sing the Kit song!" And the name stuck. (The song is a bop and I obsessively listened to it last year when I first heard the actual song.)

Idk if you want to listen to it it's there. I did research on it but that's a whole separate thing. Also yes it does use the f slur. It was regarding cigarettes (damn British people)

Okay... storyline (I remember the movie more. I only read the beforever book too so my memory of the actual story is a bit tainted. And because the beforever books are honestly horrible because they cut out legitimately the entire story to make it shorter, I will be referring to the movie.)

So the movie starts out with kit going to her brother Charlie's place of work to turn in a newspaper she wrote herself (he works at the Cincinnati News thingy. Idk I don't read the news.) In the book he is living at home about to leave for uni, and he doesn't go because they are too poor. So this guy is like "hey this is a giant company... we can't take ur newspaper sorry" and she goes home.

When she gets there there are two hobos who need a job for some food and she brings them to her mom so they can get some. Tbh I can't remember their names. One is this like... tall white boy, and the other is a child. He isn't white. He's prolly black but idk. The mom, Margret is hanging out with Judgy socialites and she is nice but the others are not. One of them makes a comment about how it's disgusting how they don't have a place to live (keep her in mind she is important later.) Then her and three other girls go into a treehouse together and take an oath of allegiance to the treehouse club. It's basically about women who did great things like Amelia Earheart. In it is her best friend Ruth-Ann "Ruthie" Smithens, and two other girls. They are sisters and live across the street.

Unfortunately in the middle of the oath the look outside to see the girls mom weeping outside the house, and all of their furniture being moved out. A foreclosure sign was being nailed into their front yard. Both girls ledt to never be seen again. Seriously where did they go? Anyway this didn't really affect our unvothered queen Kit and she decided to write a newspaper article about it for her father to read. (In the book he came home in a car, in the movie he walked. Idk why tbh.) It deeply bothered him and he had a sad demeaner

Nothing really happens for a bit if I remember right, until she goes on a little trip to the store or something and she sees a little dog with a sign that says "name is grace. Can't feed anymore" and she begs her mom to get her. She reluctantly says yes and suddenly a man runs by with a stolen wallet. He has a parrot tattoo. Remember that for later too.

That night her snobby rich uncle came over and raged over the fact they adopted a dog and nothing else really happened. He has more importance in the books I think.

Anyway. Remember that socialite from earlier? Yeah. She becomes homeless. Karma. Margret, who felt they were doing fine invited her to live with them, and she did. She moved in with her son whatsitsface or whatever. Idk he's not #girlpower or whatever. He is girlypop. Defo fr. Anyway in the book he's like "frail" or whatever and kit hates him for it. So not slay kit. Be nice to him (I just rememyhis name was Stirling.)

Anyway her dad comes home from work and is concerned about the fact they moved in and then kit goes to school. There is a bully and Stirling essentially tar and feathered him (kits school outfit ft. Maryellen because this is the only one I took btw)

Anyway so basically they're taking a field trip to the food kitchen to help the less fortunate and kit sees her dad and throws a hissy fit saying she hates her dad or something. In the book he just sold the car and that's what set her off. He went to Chicago or something and she got so mad and typed on the typewriter about how stupid Chicago was and money and how she hated her dad, then scrapped the letter and wrote about how cool the boarders she took in were. Yes boarders. The ones in the book seem lame. It was like a few teachers and a doctor or something idk. In the movie tho, a dancer, a librarian, a magician, then of course Stirling and his mom.

Nothing really happens for a while excepy that those two hobos have been working for them still and Margret gives them the dad's old boots. That's important to know.

Kit goes to the hobo camp with Stirling, Ruthie, and the two hobos and she writes a newspaper about it. She tries to get this one published but fails again.

Then she goes home and her family and all boarders put their values into a box and hid it in the house because Ruthies dad (a rich banker who keeps none of his money in the bank) was robbed. Actually it was robbed by some guy... no someone they know. They had kits dad's shoes. YES JT WAS THE HOBOS. but they wouldn't do that... would they? No... because the culprit has a parrot tattoo and neither had that!!!

So basically they were framed... but by who?

No time to figure it out because the kitties were robbed and their house was foreclosed. They had only a little bit to move out, but until that one of the boarders' cousins moved in. Kit saw that he had a tattoo and investigated his room while they were gone. She found EVERYTHING that was stolen, and chased them down. They found her Ruthie and Stirling and they got into this epic chase. Because they could read hobo they figured out which way the camp was and switched the sign backwards. The hobos knew them, and liked them, so they hid them when the people came (the magician, his cousin, and the librarian oddly enough) and they threatened the hobos. Basically the popo caught them or something and the other hobos were released (oh yeah I forgot to mention the short one ended up being trans omg)

Kit won her family a cash reward because it turned out they were like major criminals, then she wrote a newspaper article, got it published, and got like 3k in modern day money from it. They were saved.

Thanksgiving day came up and it was pretty normal, except now there were boarders. Then the door rings. Kit jumps up thinking it's her dad and it ends up being every single hobo from camp bringing a different kind of hobo food. Also the trans one learned to read thats like a whole sub plot I forgot to mention. She reads in front of the whole group of people and everyone is happy, except for kit. She misses dad. All of a sudden in the isolating quiet of such a loud place she looks outside and sees a figure. HER DAD.

Anyway that was basically it tbh but here are some other outfits I have

#anon you just made my year tbh.#Kit J #kit kittridge #american girl #Lesbian icon

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legobatjoker · 2 years

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literally screaming omfg omfg ofmg i am SOSOS INSANLY EXCITED FOR MIDNGIHTS LIKE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i literally feel almost unwell with excitment like i cannot believe that tommorw there will be a full knew taylors swift album fwith so many new songs us to love and obsessed and cry over and lyrics to freak out over and jsutt !!!!!!!! omfg ofmg odfmg i am soso insanley excited you have no idea and just like !!! i literally still cannot believe that it is real like i tihnk abt ti an im just like nope no way but its REAL and im gonna lsiten to it tmrw and im so excited to finally lsiten to sm songs like anti hero and lavander haze and youre on your own kind andv igilante shit and bejeweled and midngiht rain and sweet nothing and just THE WHOLE ENTIRE ALBUM WHICH I STILL CANNOT BELIEVE IS REALL BUT I AM SO INSANLEY EXCITED FOR ANDJ SUTT AHHH OMG OMG OMFGGG !!!!!!!!! IM SO EXCITED AND CANNOT WAIT OR BELEIVE THAT ILL BE ALBE OTO LSITEN IT TMRW JUST HOLY SHIT !!!!!!!!! also btw im planning to like. i with red tv i sent u a million asks abt the album while listening to it but this time the plan is to lsiten it fully on my own w nothing else even going on eyes closed in my room first but i will freak out abt the whole album in your askbox afterwards BUT ik youre also busy friday so lmk if like. if u know you wont b able to lsiten to the whole album in the day and wld prefer if i didnt or if i didnt send lyrics and just told you which songs were my faves etc then lmk !! (tho ill prob post lyrics on my blog anyway so sorry if u want to avoid those b4 the album comes out)

YEHAYEHAYHEAHHHHH I KNOW EXACTLY THE UNWELL W EXCITEMENT FEELING UR TALKING ABT LIKE. YEAH IM SOO FUCKING EXCITED I CANNNOT BELIEVE ITS REAL AND GONNA HAPPEN !! SO SOON FOR ME (altho i am pissed bcuz i dont think im gonna b able to stay up for it and actually experiene it like i wanna bleh but!! also this way we’ll both have missed it and b in the same boat and listen to it. not together or at the same time even but in the same kinda moment ykw SHDBXJJS) and like. yes omg plsssss idk if ill b able to respond to many asks tmrw bcuz of business BUT IF U WANNA SEND THEM (only if u wanna ofc) THEN PLS PLS PLSSSS SEND THEM BCUZ I AM SO EXICTED TO HEAR UR THOUGHTS ON IT AND J. AGHHHHHHHHH NEW TSWIFT ALBUMMMM

#mewtuals #castle.answers #LIKEEE. AHGGGHHH

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bangcakes · 3 years

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#my rooms above the garage right #so ever since covid my brothers been leaving through there for work at 6am #it wakes me up every fuckin time #i just let it go bc i assumed my paremts told him to do it out of some safety thing #but this week i brought it up.... n my parents were likee.... no.... he does that by his own decision #bc its easier for him #n i was like WHAT THE FUCK. IVE BEEN WOKEN UP AT 6AM ALMOST EVERY DAY FOR A FUCKIN YEAR FOR NO REASON #N IM STILL SO FUCKIN MAD #LIKE????? HE DIDNT CONSIDER ME AT ALL??? LIKE....#THE GARAGE DOOR OPENING/CLOSING IS SO FUCKIN LOUD #LIKE HES SO SELFISH WHAT THE FUCK #I TOLD HIM TO STOP. N HE FUCKIN BETTER.#UGGGHHHHHHH #personal #n ALSO. my parents are getting vaccinated tmmrw.... n they were concerned they might need a ride (they dont)#so they asked me n i was like wouldnt it make more sense for your VACCINATED child to do it #n they were like.... oh... true #sk they asked him n he said no. WHAT THDJCKFKDMSZM #I END UP HAVING TO DO EVERYTHING SOMETIMES #ITS JUST SO.... AGHHHHHHHHH #my brother gets mad over everything too. like i eat a chip n he goes into a rage #or i play music out loud n hes like That's Annoying. like fuckin CHILL MAYBE???#he always does what he wants tho #god im so fuckin pissed NNXNXNXNXMZNNZ

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clumsyclifford · 3 years

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1, 2, 3, 4, 10, 11 for airport malum?? I'm going far back but that is the first fic that came to mind so i'm sticking with it - taylor <3

ooh that is pretty far back all the way back to sam's 23rd birthday and now she's almost at her 24th not to stress you out or anything sam besides i love that fic every time i reread it i'm like damn. this one hits

anyway spoilers ahead for airport malum fic

changing flights so you'd stay with me (aka airport malum)

1: What inspired you to write the fic this way? easy answer! i took sam's responses from when i asked her what stuff she liked in fic, and then i just...did that.

i'm not sure where the 5+1 came from but i tend to drift towards that format in spite of myself because i really like the satisfaction of a narrative thread that keeps cropping up and then gets flipped on its head like that. i fucking love 5+1s. and i think i did it by month because i wanted a realistic amount of time to pass between each interaction so that the reader could assume (1) that michael and calum had been communicating and growing their relationship offscreen and (2) that the point at which they got together or whatever was a realistic amount of time away from when they first met. also that (3) calum isn't just constantly flying around for his job. i think it made sense

2: What scene did you first put down? the first one, think? i should check the doc history for this but i believe this fic was written at least mostly in order. yeah the first scene was written first

3: What’s your favorite line of narration? there are so many. i'm really fond of the first paragraph tbh

They say that you sleep for a third of your life. Calum is pretty confident he’s going to have spent another third of his life in one terminal or another, at the exact same airport, drinking the exact same coffee from the exact same Dunkin Donuts, and all he’ll have is thirty-three measly years to accomplish everything else he wants to do. Which really isn’t that many, considering he’s already used up twenty-four of them. What can anyone accomplish in nine years? Not a lot. And that’s assuming that Calum is going to live a grand total of ninety-nine years, which is highly unrealistic. The average lifespan for human beings these days is really closer to seventy-five years, which actually means that Calum’s life is going to end in one year. One year.

it's the most bullshit logic ever written. i fucking love it i feel like it establishes calum as such a specific character right from the start

also though

Michael beams and falls into a backwards walk. “I’ve got you,” he promises. “Text me when you land?”

“I will,” Calum says, wondering when he became the type of person to have someone to text when he lands, and when that someone became Michael.

WHEN HE BECAME THE TYPE OF PERSON TO !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ANYWAY

4: What’s your favorite line of dialogue? coughs significantly

“It’s fuckin’ August, man,” Calum says. “Summers in D.C. are horrible.”

okay that's not my favorite line of dialogue but it's definitely the most fucking accurate. i scrolled through the whole fic and honestly could not narrow it down to just one so here are a couple of my favorite dialogue moments

“Hello?”

“I said I’d call,” says Michael from the other end. He sounds like he’s smiling. “So I’m calling.”

“This is so obviously not what I meant,” Calum says, rolling his eyes, but he’s grinning despite himself.

and

“That’s such pop star bullshit,” Calum returns. “I need to know what the promo is for, Mike. My Twitter followers are dying to find out.”

“Mhm,” Michael says, rolling his eyes over a grin. “You and your twenty-seven Twitter followers. On your private Twitter account.”

“For all you know I have a second, secret account, where I moonlight as a teenage girl who swoons at the indescribably hot Michael Clifford and his sexy sexy guitar skills,” Calum says, and then wrinkles his nose. “That makes me seem super creepy and gross. I don’t — I don’t do that. That’d be really weird.”

10: Why did you choose this pairing for this particular story? once again i point you in the direction of miss samantha tirednotflirting!

oh the times they are a-changin.

11: What do you like best about this fic? the PRANKS!!!!! THE FUCKING PRANKS!!!! calum talking about all the fucking pranks he and his coworkers do on each other!!!! most of these pranks are ones my dad (also a lawyer) has done to his coworkers or has had done to him and i think it's hilarious i fucking love the dynamic of a group of colleagues who prank the shit out of each other and i just love how the pranks keep sneaking into the story for their lil moments of stardom. good for them

fic asks

#sam its the way this time last year you were exclusively reading 5sos fic #imagine that #no but seriously the pranks are the best part of this fic #calum being like i am a nice friend and i also just happened to recently put clingfilm over all of ashtons drawers. so.#i will be nice to him.#the way michael HELPS him prank ashton #aghhhhhhhhh #thank u honey i love this fic so much #taylor #ask #anonymous #should i bother tagging you with a url lol #squishmichael

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noteguk · 3 years

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NALA MY BELOVED….. AGHDEJLWMDKWMWKWJWLJALSJWIWUROWJEKRNRKEMEKEMRKWNKWJQKWJWKQJWKEJEKQJWOEUOR!!!! I’ve literally been anticipating bad habit ever since you announced its release date and it’s safe to say it EXCEEDED my expectations. 100000000% worth the wait. you never cease to amaze me like…… you are such a talented writer and you genuinely bring life to your characters which can definitely be difficult however you do it perfectly!!! i have gotten so attached to bi oc and jk like AGHHHHHHHHH😭😭😭😭😭😭 bad influence is absolutely one of my favorite series everrrrr ever ever and it’s not even done yet like that’s how you KNOW it’s so good. i wanna thank you again and again and again for sharing this wonderful story with us and taking time out of your day to talk to us about it whether it be making texts, drabbles, parts in their entirety, etc!!!! i cannot express my appreciation for you enough, seriously. bad habit was so sosososososoo great i cannot WAIT for bad romance and more content of silly + stubborn oc and jungkook….. thank you again and please remember to take care of yourself!!!! you are the best!!!!

Omg thank you so much!!! Sorry for taking so long to answer your message but I just didn’t know how to express how grateful it made me 😔❤️ thank you so much for reading and for all your support, things like this seriously make my day 100% better and motivate me to keep writing. So thank you guys for your interest as well — without it, bad influence would probably would have stayed as a one-shot 🥺

#thank you once again!!!!!#ask

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bladeemp3 · 4 years

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god this is so fucked up like i had my old blog for years and i treated it more like a diary than anything else like it was a virtual representation of my mindset at the time like i could go back and see wtf i was on like a year ago or 2 years ago and it was so cool like just having this space where i can see how much i changed n shit cuz i changed a lot like so much and not just in a sense of like aesthetics or interests like no it was my whole mindset my whole personality like even the way i typed my text posts changed n shit my opinions everything being able to go back and see all that was so cool and now its gone forever aghhhhhhhhh

#3.txt

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thehopefuldandelion · 4 years

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Not Him

part 2

part 1 is here on ao3. here on fanfiction.net

thanks to all who supported me in part 1 specifically @lovely-tothe-bone and @tindomrl

everlark.

I do not own any of these characters:)

***

A day later and I still hadn’t process the fact that just yesterday, Gale and his “intern”, Madge, were in my bed. Gale cheated on me. So what, maybe I had some erotic thoughts about Peeta. I hadn’t actually gone through with them. He’s my boss anyway. I can’t think like that.

Shaking that thought away, I focus on getting ready for the day. Another day ignoring Peeta, another day without Gale. I get dressed quickly in a pencil skirt and button up shirt with a black suit jacket. The more conservative today, the better.

The apartment seems, empty, without another soul here. The tv which used to drown out the blaring noise of honking cars is silent, no dents in the couch to be seen. I don’t have to cook breakfast for two people, instead just for me. One singular person. I suck in a breath and release it. In all honesty, the apartment might seem empty, lonely even, but I don’t miss Gale. As our relationship dwindled and tottered over the edge, we became more like roommates. I can’t even remember the last time he touched me romantically. Pass by pecks and simple questions with simple answers is the only interaction we really had near the end. No wonder he cheated on me.

I should probably be making a bigger deal out of this but I’m too exhausted to care. Gale seemed done with me so why should I still keep rekindling the tiny fire we had? I push all these thoughts that have haunted me since last night far back into my overwhelmed brain and hope that today goes smoothly.

Shit. There goes the milk spilling all over the floor. Yeah today is not gonna be smooth. I don’t have time for this. Shit. Shit. Shit. I hear the toaster pop! meaning the toast is done, burnt, of course. And as I spread butter a chunk slides down my freshly ironed shirt. Fuck. On my way to the bedroom, pretty much jogging, I bump my hip into the chair, hard, (that will leave a bruise) causing me to stub my toe on the door post.

“Aghhhhhhhhh,” I scream in pain and frustration.

I guess this is the world punishing me for some odd reason. Dang. I’m late. I mean I do need this job, but I won’t have to see Peeta anymore so it’s kinda a win-win. Not really, in the end it would be a hard loss and a joyful win. Stop thinking, Katniss. You need to get to work. Yikes. This day sucks.

***

“Good Morning, Katniss,” Peeta greets me while sipping a cup of coffee. Black.

“Hello, Peeta. How was your night?”

“Wonderful. Isn’t it such a lovely day?” He says looking straight at me. I noticed he didn’t even glance out the clear windows. “And how are you on this beautiful day?”

“Uh, it’s great...I’m great,”I respond while gritting my teeth. I can’t stand his kindness. He peered at me, his face in disbelief, turning his head slightly.

He almost scoffs and then says, “Ok, Katniss. Whatever you say.”

What is he? A psychopath? Telekinetic? Wouldn't be surprised.

“Oh, and Katniss? You have a stain on your shirt.”

Fuck.

Over the past week of working at this hell-hole, I observed Peeta giving me looks, unsettling but not in a vicious way. I almost want to relish in the tingling feeling they bring from head to toe. What is wrong with me. My brain and heart are sending two very different signals to my body. I need to throw all thoughts of Peeta in the sudden absent trashcan in my baffled brain. Can anyone find that missing trashcan?

“Katniss?” I hear someone call from behind me.

My chair swivels around and I see a jubilantly smiling Peeta fixated on me, or more particularly the stain. Ugh, that freakin stain. He pulls a hand from behind his back and I see he’s holding a shirt. I give him a befuddled look and he quickly stammers to explain what it’s for.

“Uh, I always have an extra button up with me and was wondering if...well if...if you wanted to wear it until tomorrow. I mean, obviously, you can change when you get home. You don’t actually have to wear it until tomorrow.” He rubs the back of his neck with his hand and blushes a deep shade of red. “So, if you’d be interested, I uh-”

I save him the embarrassment by grabbing the shirt out of his hands and running to the bathroom. He gives me a bewildered look and I almost want to laugh. But I don’t. Because I hate him. Right? Right. Lie. And me borrowing his shirt is just because I have no other option. Right. Lie.

Slowly unbuttoning my shirt, I imagine what this would feel like if it was a different situation with Peeta unbuttoning it for me. Oh god. A shoot of pleasure settles in my lower half. What is this man doing to me?

The white button up smells of dill and almost, if I’m not mistaken, cinnamon. The sweet smell wafts into my nose making me hungry. As expected, I am engulfed in the shirt, enveloping me in warmth and...love? That’s bizarre. I never associated Peeta and love. Those two never intermingled in my mind. With the shirt tucked into my skirt and having splashed frigid water on my face, I walk, no, speed-walk towards my desk.

Peeta pops his head out from his office and is about to say something when he looks at me. His mouth opens a few times but no words form. Ok then. “K...Katniss, uh, um, I, uh, can you-

The phone rings distracting me momentarily from his stammering.

“This is she.”

“Yes, he is here.”

“I’ll transfer you now.”

I turn to Peeta, seeing him still utterly flabbergasted, and say, “Katie’s Cakes on line 1, Mr. Mellark.”

Recovered, he answers, “Thank...Thanks, Katniss.” In a blink of an eye he is back in his office with the door safely closed.

I snort to myself and wonder where else the day will lead.

***

My head is throbbing. Countless phone calls and a trip to the coffee shop down the street later and its 6pm, and I’m still at work. Honestly, a pint of Ben and Jerry’s and Netflix are calling my name. Ugh, I can’t wait to go home. I should've brought some Advil. Mentally adding that reminder for next time.

A quick glance around the office assures me I’m the only one here. Hallelujah. I’m starving. Maybe there's something in the break room. As I open the fridge and bend down to reach some leftover cookies form a party, I hear a gasp and someone run out of the room. Huh. That’s odd. My head hurts and I’m hungry so I guess I’m hallucinating. Eh, it happens.

Oh my God. These cookies are heaven on earth. I moan as I take a bite. Another gasp. What the hell. It can't be me...can it? I start to investigate. My thought process is that if it is a demon or ghost, at least I can die and never have to come here again. The only lights on are from my cubicle and...wait that's weird, why are Peeta’s office lights on. Hmm.

As I turn the corner to get to his office, I bump into a something hard.

“Oof.”

“Are you ok, I’m so sorry Katniss.”

It takes me a second to regain my bearings. “Peeta? What the fuck?”

“Ah, I didn’t mean to bump into you,” he says with a slight blush on his cheeks. He then offers his hand for me to take and helps me up. I brush the dust from the ground of my skirt.

Ok, then.

“It’s fine Peeta. I’ll survive.”

“CanIbuyyoudinner?”

“What?”

“Uh, can I take you out?” he says.

“As a date?” I inquire him. There is no way in hell I would go on a date with Peeta Mellark. Right?

“Um,” he rubs the back of his neck, the blush spreading from his cheeks to his ears, then neck. “I guess. I was thinking more of an apology. For bumping into you, that is.”

“Ok,” I say slowly, reminding myself this is not a date. Yes, definitely not a date. “When?”

“Now?”

“Uh, um, sure. Yes, now is fine.” I say quickly trying to cover up my stammering.

I walk over to grab my purse and put on my jacket. “So where, were you thinking?”

“I have something in mind,” he tells me with a glimmer of mischief in his eyes.

***

We end up at a bakery about 2 miles outside of city limits. I was confused at first, until Peeta told me he grew up around here and worked at this bakery until taking over Mellark Enterprises from his dad. The bakery is small and homey, wood tables slightly worn down from years of use. The counters are stained, each stain telling a story. It seemed like a nice place to grow up, full of love and laughter, something I never understood.

Peeta lets me try a variety of pastries, all delicious and mouth watering.

“I actually own this bakery.” Peeta tells me.

“So that’s why we are in here safe and sound and not arrested for breaking and entering.” I tease him.

He laughs and looks me in the eyes. “I don’t come here often enough, being CEO of a company and all,” he says while stabbing his fork into a muffin. “It’s peaceful out here. Almost like, everyone has taken time to reflect on their lives and go about their days how they want too.”

“So, what I’m picking up on is you didn't want to be a CEO of a multi-million dollar company.”

“Honestly, no.” He breathes out. “I wanted to be a famous painter and if that didn't work out I’d just stay here, spending the rest of my days baking.”

“Makes, sense. Painter you say? Just how good are you?” I laugh.

Peeta shrugs his shoulders. “I’m not terrible.” One of his curls has fallen over his eyes and it takes all my restraint to not reach my hand over and brush it back.

Hours later we were still talking and laughing. I was having a great time.

“No, way. You actually said you were the doctor and flew around in the TARDIS. I can’t believe she considered that that was true.”

“Oh, yeah. She was mortified. Best blind date I’ve ever been on.”

“Well, I wouldn't have run off,” I blush.

“Good to know,” Peeta says in return, giving me a look of hope.

We both just peer at each other, lost in thoughts of our own. The silence isn't awkward per se, it’s almost satiated.

“Well, I should get home. I do have work after all.”

“Of course, Katniss. Thanks for joining me. I hope this evening was apology enough,” he says kindly.

“It will suffice,” I tease.

“I’ll see you tomorrow?” he asks, almost sad to see me go.

“Tomorrow. Good Night, Peeta.”

“’Night, Katniss.”

I drive away feeling strange. Do I like my boss? More importantly, do I like Peeta Mellark?

***

After hanging up my coat and setting down my purse, I shimmy of my skirt, keeping Peeta’s button up on, I jump into bed and spread out like a starfish. This day is over. Finally. As my eyes become heavy and I drift off into a deep slumber, my phone pings!

From: Unknown 11:46

Hey Katniss, this is Peeta. I just wanted to know if you got home safe.

From: Katniss 11:47

Hi Peeta. I did thank you for your concern. Sleep Well.

From: Peeta Mellark 11:49

Sweet Dreams, Katniss.

I turn off my phone, not even considering what the message implies. It’s been a long day and the last thing I need to worry about is Peeta and I’s relationship.

I remembered to set my alarm last night, luckily, so I won't be late for work. I am still wearing Peeta’s button up. Slowly, but surely, I get out of bed, shower, and eat breakfast. I turn on the tv, because I need some distraction. Opening the window next to the fire exit, allows for some much needed air into the apartment. A familiar voice draws me out of my mental to do list for today.

Holy Shit.

Peeta is on tv. Why didn't I know about this? I’m his secretary for god’s sake. Caesar Flickerman who hosts Good Morning Panem is asking him questions about everything, from his favorite food to his love life.

“So, Peeta. What's it like being the CEO if such a profitable company?”

“Uh, it’s great. Hard work, but it’s good,” Peeta says with a somber look on his face. I think back to our conversations last night. He never asked to be CEO, but it was thrust upon him like a teacher giving homework.

“That’s awesome, Peeta.” Caesar leans back in his chair preparing to ask the next question. “Tell me, you were just added on “Forbes Top 10″ and given the title of “Panem’s Most Eligible Bachelor”. Anyone out there who catches your eye?”

Peeta has a slight hesitation in his voice before looking the camera in the eye and saying, “No, not really anyone at the moment.”

“Aw, c’mon Peeta. There must be one special someone. You can tell us.” Caesar inquires.

I see Peeta gulp nervously and blink a couple times. “Well, there is this one girl. I’ve loved her since forever, really.”

The audience, including Caesar, perk up at this. “Here’s what you do, buy her some flowers and chocolates and win her heart.”

“She’s not really that type of girl, plus I think she hates me.”

“Ah, well that's too bad,” Caesar shrugs. “Her loss. Am I right folks?”

The audience abounds in laughter and claps. Who is this mystery girl? I mean I hate Peeta, or used too, but it can't be me. Can it? Shaking those thoughts away, I turn off the tv, and grab my jacket and purse. Time to start the day.

***

Peeta’s office is still locked. I’m assuming he is still at Good Morning Panem. These past few days have been, strange. From breaking up with Gale, realizing I don't hate Peeta, and finding out he loves this mystery girl, I just don't know what to expect from this job anymore. My mind can’t process this abundance of, in a way, drama. Hey, I’m anti-social. What can I say?

Sticky notes with phone numbers and lists can be found on almost every surface of my workspace. I try to eliminate the countless number of them as the day drags on. No sign of Peeta. It’s boring without his tacky humor and clever remarks.

I decide to call Annie to get me out of this slump.

“Hey Katniss! What’s up?” Annie asks. “Peeta likes, no, loves someone and I think it's me. What do I do?” I say shakily, unsure of what to think of all these conflicting emotions.

I hear Annie giggle and then regain her composure. “Hi to you too. And I don’t know, Katniss. Just ask him on a date and if he says yes then he likes you.”

“But, every time I even consider doing something like that with him, I’m brought back to all the times in our childhood when he was just rude and infuriating.”

“Sounds to me that you might like him back, Katniss. You do know, that when a guy teases you it usually means he likes you. That could explain why he was how he was in middle school and high school,” Annie explains.

It makes sense, but I can’t justify that for his true feelings. The only way to figure this out is to confront him. Crap.

“You have a lot of thinking to do Everdeen. I’ll see you tomorrow for zen, yeah?”

“Yup, thanks Annie for the much needed clarification,” I say gratefully.

“Of course. Anytime, my friend. See ya.”

“Bye,” I hang up.

I go to the closest cafe for my lunch break, needing to get out of the office, and forgo an afternoon pick me up for a sandwich. It’s not as delicious as the sandwiches at Peeta’s bakery, but it does the job of filling my stomach. The bread isn't fresh and the meat was probably cut a week ago, then frozen, and don't even get me started- wait, when did I become a food connoisseur?

I throw away the trash and walk back to Mellark Enterprises, hit the elevator button for the 8th floor, and continue in my secretary duties. I see Peeta’s office door open and something compels me to talk to him.

“Hey, so I saw you on tv this morning,” I say to a slightly surprised Peeta.

“Uh, yeah,” There he goes rubbing the back of his neck again. “What did you think?”

“You did great, I mean, you always do,” he blushes at this. “Mystery girl, eh? Caesar Flickerman had to bite tooth and nail to get that out of you.”

“She’s something special, indeed. I don’t think she knows I like her,” At this, Peeta gives me puppy dog eyes.

Clearing my throat, I respond, “I was wondering if you were free, possibly tonight? There’s this movie that came out that I’ve been dying to see and wanted to go with a friend.”

“Yeah, I would love to, Katniss.”

“O-Ok cool,” I say as I shoot finger guns at him. Finger guns...really Katniss?

Flustered and slightly embarrassed, I leave the office and sit down at my desk.

***

We meet up at the theatre and head straight for concessions. My stomach grumbles at the savory smell of popcorn and melted butter, salty pretzels and bubbly soda.

“What do you like Peeta?” I ask him curiously.

“Oh, I myself love a classic bucket of buttered popcorn and M&Ms,” he says confidently.

“Mmm, sound delicious.”

“Do-Do you want to share Katniss?” Peeta inquires me nervously.

“It is a large bucket of popcorn; I don't think I could finish it on my own. Sure, we can share.” I have to remind myself this is not a date. I kinda wish it was though.

Before I even have a chance to get my credit card out, Peeta is already paying for our snacks.

“Peeta!” I scold while hitting his arm jokingly. “I should pay. I invited you, after all.”

“Too late, Katniss,” He says as he taps my nose.

We both look away nervously, embarrassed by our intimate actions.

About halfway through the movie, we stop passing the popcorn bucket and I feel drowsy. I wake up by someone softly calling my name.

“Katniss, Katniss. Time to wake up.”

Quickly, I realize my head is on Peeta’s shoulder and my arms are wrapped around his. How did that happen.

“I didn't want to wake you. Your slumber looked peaceful, sleeping beauty.”

“I’m so sorry, Peeta. I swear I didn't mean to fall asleep on your arm,” I apologize.

“It’s ok. You can fall asleep on me any time you need to,” He tells me smiling without a care in the world.

I gasp. “U-Uh, o-ok Peeta. Thank you for the offer.”

On our way out, I turn to him and give him a peck on the cheek. Then, like a cheetah, I dash to my car, leaving Peeta speechless. What is happening to me?!

***

3249 words later and this is the product. Hope you enjoyed!

#nothim #everlark #The Hunger Games #au #fic #thehopefuldandelion

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