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#I've been super emotional way more than usual
genshin-obsessed · 5 months
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Him as a husband | Honkai Star Rail
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✩ ‒ It's been a while since I've wrriten anything for star rail, so I decided to make these cute lil hcs. I'm not branching out to the newest pretty boy yet, I don't know anything about him. I avoided saying Valentine’s Day cuz they're not on earth or whatever.
✩ ‒ I'm also trying to butter y'all up a little for something else I'm planning lmao
✩ ‒ Characters: Caelus, Dan Heng, Jing Yuan, Blade, Luocha
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✩ ‒ Caelus
He's not vocal about being married per se, but people usually know he's married. Other than the ring, he's very unresponsive to flirting. If anyone attempts to flirt with him, he'll just act like he doesn't get it. It makes things awkward and people often leave after.
He's very attentive to you. If you're having a bad day, he'll know pretty much immediately and will do anything and everything to get your mind off of it if you don't want to talk about it.
He loves to celebrate holidays for couples. They're super special days because every day with him is special, but he does go out of his way a little bit to surprise you with something. Could even be food, as long as you're surprised and smiling.
Cuddles are a must. You better hope your rooms are cold at night because he cuddles up to you every single time. He'll either lay his head on your chest or hug you against him, so sometimes it feels really hot in the morning.
Caelus prefers outdoor activities as dates, but isn't opposed to staying in. Movies, snacks, just being with one another isn't so bad. But going to a new planet and fighting baddies is also pretty enticing. More on that, Caelus has near heart attacks when you get hurt- like he saw you get hurt badly once and almost cried. Ok, no, he cried a little.
Children are up to you. He doesn't have much of a preference.
✩ ‒ Dan Heng
"Are you two married? You don't act like it." This has and always will confuse Dan Heng. What the hell does it mean? Is he supposed to be all over you or something? He has class. Though... he will hold your hand more often. Maybe the ring he'll get you for your anniversary might have a ginormous gem so it blinds everyone or something.
He's also pretty attentive to your needs and emotions. The second he thinks you're upset or hurt, he's at your side. He may or may not be a little clingy but he's so terrified of losing you. It's actually changed him for the better a little. He's less quiet, more expressive, and a lot more open to communication. That could also be due to his recent transformation...
He's not overly fond of those "couple days" because he's usually loving all year around. Why have a dedicated day? He has a hard time seeing the point in days like those.
Dates for Dan Heng are usually stay at home. He likes the more intimate activities at home- cuddling, watching movies, making out- yanno. Intimate.
Dan Heng likes kisses. Cheek kisses, neck kisses, shoulder kisses, hand kisses- don't matter. He loves them all. Usually done behind closed doors, Dan Heng never forgets to kiss you. Like, ever. He will also make up for lost kisses.
Um... he prefers no children, but it's something you can talk about later on.
✩ ‒ Jing Yuan
You have your hands full with this one. Everyone and their courier birds will know he's married to you. This man just can't stop talking about you. Like, he'll be receiving a report about something or other and just somehow manages to drop your name in the conversation. It's cute and all, but Jing Yuan, focus!
Sadly, he's a busy man. He comes home to you every single day, don't worry, but he does need to be away for most of the day. He's not the biggest fan of it and has suggested maybe trying to find a position for you to keep you close by. Other than being down right addicted to you, he worries because he's got enemies.
Jing Yuan DOES take time for those fancy couple days but they're not overly different from the usual dates. He used to make it all fancy, with giant bouquets of flowers and expensive jewelry, until he realized he was showering you with love on a specific day and not every day like he should. So, he's toned it down a little, but every now and then, he'll get you something fancy.
There isn't much time for dates. They usually include visiting him during his breaks and enjoying some tea together. Maybe spending time with Mimi or something. But on his days off, he tries really hard to set up something for you.
He kinda likes to hold you. There's nothing wrong with it, its just constant. Like, you're so cute and he just wants to hug you all the time. He does try to control himself in public to avoid making you uncomfortable.
Children? Why? Isn't Yanqing enough?
✩ ‒ Blade
Some people still have a hard time understanding that you actually married him. In your opinion, they're small minded and don't actually know Blade. Blade, himself, doesn't actually care what anyone else thinks. Though, they should mind their manners around you.
Blade can be attentive, but doesn't always know how to help. He's got his own problems, so he usually tries to use them as a reference point. When he feels depressed or lost, what would he do? He tries to help you that way. It doesn't always work, but it does help him learn more and more.
He'll forget any special "couple" days are coming up. Kafka or Silver Wolf mention it and he's always confused about them. He will try to get you something just so you don't feel left out. "Oh my husband didn't get me anything because he doesn't care about today". Never.
Blade likes cuddles, but they hurt. He's got a lot of wounds on his body so he can't hold you the way he likes. Not to mention, the mara, his personal discomfort, lack of understanding. You assure him that it's ok, but he still feels guilty often. You deserve the world, but he can barely give you himself. He does try to hold your hand a lot. You both share the same bed and he sleep extremely close.
There's not many outdoor dates with him other than going on missions which aren't dates. Usually, you two train together and just spend time with one another. Blade is willing to attend an event with you... but he's attached to you. He doesn't know anyone there.
No children. He'd be a terrible dad, sorry.
✩ ‒ Luocha
Now aren't you two an interesting couple? Luocha has a way with words. He'll let potential flirters know he's married way before they can even start flirting with him. He won't even give them the time of day, especially if they're disrespectful toward you.
Of course he's attentive. He's great at recognizing your emotions and understanding what may or may not make it worse. For example, if he attends an event, he'll know what type of people might be too forward for you. Or may know when someone is beginning to make you upset.
Not a fan of those "couple days". He literally rolls his eyes at them, like why would he hold himself back to let it all out on that day? He's all over you, every day. BUT! He does get you a flower or a small box of chocolates... or something else in the bedroom. Idk.
Luocha likes to schedule dates per week so that you can clear up time for them. Just because you have a day off doesn’t mean it needs to be a date night. Maybe you want that day to yourself, who knows? He likes to find a day or two within the week dedicated to actually going out to a restaurant, a picnic, maybe fighting some baddies- who knows. Whatever works for both of y’all.
Luocha likes being close to you, whatever that means to you. He can hold you, hold your hand, just sit close by. Generally, he finds peace around you, so it doesn't matter what you two are doing as long as he can be close to you.
Uhh kids? Are you sure?
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astrobydalia · 7 months
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🍂Cozy observations 🎃
Itssss fall you guys!!!! 🥰🥰🥰🥰 It’s actually super hot still where I live but that won’t stop me from living my cozy era. Anyways, I want to avoid collecting posts on my drafts for centuries so here’s more general observations!
work by astrobydalia
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🍂Aquarius placements are simultaneously the most understanding and empathetic people ever and the biggest assholes out there. I don't know how they pull that contradiction off but it's true (I mean this in the best way possible btw)
Moreover, I’ve noticed Aquarius placements are way more appreciative of kindness and social harmony than Libra tbh. Libra's desire for harmony can be just for the sake of keeping appearances but they are actually very judgmental. Aquarius on the other hand tend to appreciate authenticity and have a “live and let live” philosophy where they accept people unconditionally that’s why they attract popularity. Underdeveloped Aquarius tho do have a tendency to break social harmony due to pick-me behavior
🍂 Cardinal moons are serial daters. I swear every person I’ve met who had a rather active love life or were always crushing on someone was more often than on Cardinal moon
Also, Cardinal moons are always very dominant people even when don’t intend to be. They have a very summoning aura/personality that just demands engagement. They also tend to be social butterflies, even when they’re introverted they always end up surrounded by people somehow
🍂 I like to think Pisces is the final movie while Virgo is all the behind the scenes and editing
🍂I've seen this endless times where people with Mars in Libra or 7th house always end up either in law or business (mostly creating their own business, freelancers, entrepreneurs, etc)
🍂Any Venusian influence on the MC/10th house/6th house indicates a career or job where you’re required to dress up and appear very put together, having a certain aesthetic can be important in your career
🍂Saturn square or opposite MC/10th house ruler indicates the native was forced into a career they never chose/wanted in the first place or they had to wait a long time to finally have the opportunity to pursue their ideal career OR the path towards the career they chose could have been harder/more unfulfilling than they expected
🍂 I also like to think Taurus stops to smell the flowers and creates a flower bed for herself. Virgo studies the flowers and learns all about photosynthesis and shit. Capricorn creates a flower business and monopolizes the flower market
🍂 Those with Mars influence on their moon (Moon-Mars aspects, Aries/Scorpio moon) are really good at throwing shade but they’re unable to take it themselves. They don’t like to feel called out.
🍂 Mars in the 12th house people will 👏🏼hold 👏🏼 grudges 👏🏼
🍂 To be quite honest with you, every single Virgo sun I’ve met had a very standoffish personality.
🍂 Saturn retrograde individuals raised themselves. That’s why this placement is known to have issues with authority and discipline because their parents didn’t really parent them at all, so they had to set their own boundaries, rules and systems to navigate life. Getting their life together and materializing their ambitions could take extra effort for them
🍂 I usually like Capricorn Moons cause I always find that they are very loyal to everyone (friends, family, partner, etc) but honestly they are not as emotionally mature as you might think. They have a really hard time moving on from the past to the point where they can stay stuck in their wounded child self and spend a big chunk of their lives trying to overcompensate this with work, productivity and success. Tendency to depression, low emotional intelligence and being emotionally stunted. Deep down they feel like the victim of their own story
🍂 Aquarius sun+Scorpio moon: I’ve met quite a few people with this combo and with all of them I’ve noticed they always have a cult leader kinda mentality towards their friendships and connections (might apply to Aquarius+Scorpio combos in general). You’re either with them or against them. If you're not a follower they’ll hit you with the "cool kids table" attitude
🍂 My mom has Mercury in the 4th house and she once said "I don't mind moving abroad but I can't live in a place where people don't speak my native language. I need to hear my native language"
🍂 When it’s said that Venus in the 1st house people know how to make themselves look good it doesn’t mean just physically. The know how to present themselves as a more virtuous person than they actually are...
🍂Mutable risings, Mars in a mutable sign/house: their motto is “work smarter not harder”. Their first instinct will always be to find a way around challenges and difficulties. They usually aren’t the most action oriented people, but they are cunning. Their way to success is basically beating the system to make things easier for themselves.
🍂I can easily recognize Taurus Sun because they always ooze BDE. Also they always tend to have very rugged and bold physique/features
🍂From what I've seen Gemini Venus is a placement that easily makes someone stereotypically extroverted. Golden retriever energy
🍂Has anyone else noticed that succedent houses (aka fixed houses) are all related to money and wealth in some way?
2nd house: your resources, what spend your money on 5th house: gamble 8th house: shared resources, investments and debt 11th house: production of wealth
🍂All Gemini and Cancer risings I’ve met had some sort of hypersensitivity to stimuli. Gemini rising is more mental; anxiety, overthinking, information overload, etc they easily get triggered by immediate stimuli, specially noise around them. For Cancer risings this manifests more in the senses (photosensitivity, very sensitive to smells, flavors, etc) and heightened intuition just like Spiderman with spider-sense
🍂I’m sorry but why are Cancer Mercuries so elusive in their communication??? Everything they say has this "well, maybe. I don't know" or "I guess" undertone to it, they never openly say what they really mean. They are good listeners tho
🍂Underdeveloped Taurus placements feel entitled to use and dispose of people to benefit themselves. Tend to be very selfish and stingy. They do something for you they'll hang it over your head forever and act like they have ownership over you. You do something for them, they owe you nothing.
🍂Pisces Moons grew up in their own little bubble. It's very likely they missed out on 'normal' mundane experiences and this makes them feel very separated from the rest of the world and the rest of the people which is why they often come off as clueless and disconnected. They often give off the impression they've been living under a rock or a parallel universe. A perfect example of this is when Kim Kardashian said she's never been to a grocery store💀
Every single Pisces moon I’ve met never ever wanted to have kids and if they do have them they tend to not be too present in their kids’ lives. The harsh truth is pisces moons are not reliable, generally they are the ones who want to be saved and cared for
🍂I've noticed earth Venus and Venus-Saturn aspects are a little bit too good at showing contempt. To some degree they always remind me of Disgust from the Inside Out movie 😂
🍂 When I see Moon-Saturn conjunction in a chart I flinch a little tbh cause idk what’s worse the fact that their mothers couldn’t be bothered to give the native any sort of emotional comfort or the fact that these natives have normalized conditional love as the only kind of love possible. I've also noticed they grew up with strong authoritarian values and were never allowed to question hierarchies or status
Also, natives with Moon-Saturn conjunction are extremely shady people if you ask me. It's true they are insanely observant but what people don't seem to notice is that they are observant in a Joe Goldberg or Light Yagami kind of way without the murder They do be having inner monologues like that. They come across as calm, intelligent, respectful and trusted. Can use emotional expression (theirs and others') in strategic ways to influence others. Big tendency towards materialistic, utilitarian and/or elitist mindset too. I can't quite put my finger on it but I've met a lot of people with this aspect and the deeper I dig the more I keep feeling something very dark and/or disingenuous about them
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🍂Venus square Neptune people and their lack of self-respect… 🙁
🍂Aquarius Moons always give off the impression of having a rather lazy or passive personality. I'm not talking about their productivity but the fact that they seem to always have a "meh" attitude towards everything to the point where they can feel a bit disconnected similar to pisces moon
🍂Virgo risings often have freelance jobs due to Aquarius ruling their 6th house
🍂People with Industria rx (389) may actually dislike their work environment even if they like their job. I’ve noticed they often find the industry they work in to be toxic, depleting or too demanding
🍂Enterprise rx (9777) might always feel unsatisfied with their position, they might be the type to always want more and more
🍂 Aries Moon women and always attracting very immature and selfish men omg I've seen this time and time again
🍂 Scorpio moon/Moon 8th house is an underrated wealth indicator imo. I've noticed they always have a "from rags to riches" kinda life story. They however often face issues with fraud or debt along the way cause they have a tendency to take huge financial risks
🍂 you ever heard about the crabs in a bucket phenomenon? Well Ive actually observed underdeveloped 4th house placements do tend to have this kind of clingy and envious behavior particularly towards people that are really close to them. You can also experience this with people you have 4th house Synastry with; you get too attached to the comfort zone they provide to the point where they stifle your growth
🍂Pisces placements 🤝 falling for people who are bluntly abusive, controlling and narcissistic. They want to believe they’re living a beauty and the beast love story when in reality they’re trauma bonding
🍂Libra/Taurus Mars people ARE problematic and petty as fuck, they’re just good at the social game and making it look like they didn't do anything. Underdeveloped Venus energy is the opposite of peaceful, it gives major mean girl vibes and Mars being debilitated in these signs easily brings out this hostile side of Venus. The type to passively instigate drama just to make themselves look better. Very hypocritical
🍂What natives with Saturn in Taurus will consider first when choosing a career is make sure that it is well payed and gives them financial status. Other factors come second
🍂Fixed+cardinal combo in the luminaries is hands down the best sun-moon combo I've seen tbh (specially fixed sun+cardinal moon), they're a force to be reckoned with. Very charismatic, outspoken and confident people with healthy ego if developed. Most people I've met with this combo were very extroverted and/or excellent leaders
🍂Sagittarius placements 🤝 this pose 😜✌🏼
🍂Libra/7th house Lilith have a tendency to judge a book by its cover all the time
🍂I've noticed Pisces MC/10th house natives aren't very ambitious. They seem to not really care about things like self-development or being on top. From what I've seen they mostly aspire to have a pleasant and glamurous life that frees them form real life mundane worries and could desire to retire as early as possible. In some cases I've seen they could want a "princess" kinda lifestyle where they literally have no responsibilities. They want a career that liberates them from any pressure of achieving material expectations and allows them to just go brain dead all the time following a higher power/inspiration/knowledge. That's why many artists have this placements and I've also seen cases of Pisces MC people who wanted to be nuns and nurses. I've noticed that when they genuinely don't care about recieving recognition or achievements but rather do things bc it aligns with their soul that's when they become successful
🍂Scorpio placements have a tendency to be very cynical I've noticed, specially mercury and mars
🍂Gemini/3rd house Lilith can spot lies from miles away and will not be sacred to call it out
🍂As per my observation the water sign that gets idolized the most is not Pisces but Cancer 100%. Yes Pisces does get idolized but I’ve noticed that’s actually very short-lived, people tend to switch up on them SO fast cause they project a deeply unrealistic image on them and eventually fall off the pedestal. Cancer placements on the other hand are not infantized like Pisces, they are consistently very sought after people I’ve observed. They always come across as emotionally reliable even when they’re not, people always go soft for them while simultaneously respecting them so they’re always seen as perfect,kind,charming,etc. Their personality naturally portrays an energy of unconditional love and understanding so people easily get obsessed and addicted to them
🍂I always find that Pisces Venus natives have a very whimsical and juvenile personality. They also have a very extravagant taste they may like anything with bright colors, glittery shiny stuff, squishy toys, etc. they have a tendency to be a bit tacky and corny I’ve noticed
🍂Every fixed moon I've seen avoided any sort of emotional rehabilitation like the plague unless it’s strictly necessary. They believe no one can begin to understand them better than themselves and they got it all figured out already. Now this is more my opinion but I feel like they low-key underestimate the amount of healing they actually need to do cause they really struggle taking emotional accountability. They have a tendency to act like their needs and feelings justify everything so there's not much to "fix" or heal
🍂People who have at least 2 out of their big 3 in cardinal signs are often seen as the golden girl/boy
🍂Capricorn/Virgo moons will be literally the best at what they do and make it seem so effortless. If you ask them how they got so successful they'll be like "idk I guess I just practiced a lot"
🍂I’ve noticed your 8th house sign(s) represent themes that people are consistently using against you as the fastest way to tear you down, so you always end up feeling powerless here at some point. That’s why you tend to resent this energy and have toxic dynamics with people who have their planets here. This house is literally the death of you (8th from 1st), but it can also be the source of your empowerment once you claim this energy so it's best that you keep this house to yourself as much as possible. Some examples:
Gemini 8th house: using what you say against you. you could have a hard time with people believing your words, what you say is always scandalous and/or rubs people the wrong way. Gossip or information that makes you look bad. People always think you’re lying or deceiving or have ulterior motives Cancer 8th house: you could struggle with getting sympathy and emotional support from people. Others think you’re just being vulnerable and complaining for clout. Any display of emotion or care will be seen as manipulative. People trying to break or ruin your relationship with your family or closed ones Capricorn 8th house: you struggle with people respecting you, others don't take you seriously and don't see you as a valid authority. Any attempt to make yourself respected will be seen as dictatorial or elitist behavior, any desire to succeed will be seen as you being power hungry. People try to dismiss or belittle your achievements
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work by astrobydalia
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prettyoatmeal · 1 year
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Simon 'Ghost' Riley Headcanons While You're Dating
I figured this would be kinda cute since I've only written for König. Switching it up just a little bit since I think the 141 boys are cuties <3
I know this is quite long too, I'm sorry I had a lot of thoughts I wanted to get out!!!!!
There will be both SFW and NSFW with a GN reader (they/them pronouns) ^^ Enjoy!
GENRE: Fluff, smut after NSFW cut
WARNINGS: Mentions of Ghost's childhood
Masterlist here!
***************
You'd needed to be the one to tell him how you'd felt first. Simon wasn't one to open up about his emotions and mostly tried to ignore and bottle up his feelings, so he never would've been able to gain that courage to tell you first.
When you did tell him, he became super flustered behind that mask of his. You normally called him by his alias and never really used his actual name, so he knew what you were going to say would've been serious.
"Hey, Simon? I think I like you. And I understand if you don't feel the same way, I just figured I should tell you sooner than later."
...
"Simon..?"
He would let out a flustered grumble of "Yeah yeah,, I like you too." and you two would slowly, but surely, warm up to each other more.
He'd be a very gentle lover. Just the thought of him hurting you, even by accident, made him violently ill.
Ghost wouldn't be one to be touchy very early on in you guys' relationship, he kept a lot to himself and you respected that. At times you would hold back from trying to hug him, or hold his hand, or anything, but you didn't mind. You wanted to make sure he was comfortable.
He'd soon realised you were the cuddly, touchy type, so he'd begin making moves like wrapping his arm around your waist or linking his pinkie with yours while you were walking. Just those small touches alone would make your knees weak.
Simon faced a lot of trauma in his childhood so he had trouble opening up to you at first. Once he did start opening up to you, he realised he didn't need to ignore his feelings for once. You made him feel safe.
>:'(( he loves you so much.
He'd call you all the usual pet names such as 'my love', 'darling', 'sweetheart', etc.
You'd often be the only thing on his mind when he'd be on missions or back in the barracks.
He'd always keep a printed photograph of you in a pocket somewhere so he could remember who he was fighting for.
When he'd be upset, he'd always pull that photo out just to look at it. Just seeing your face brought him immense comfort.
His love language would definitely be acts of service. He'll gladly cook a nice meal for you, or tell you to sit down and relax so he could take care of the cleaning.
However, it goes both ways. You'll pack him a lunch for the day He'd be on his knees. Make his bed for him if he were to be too busy? He'll completely melt. It's those little things.
His father didn't care all that much for him as a child coming from an abusive household, essentially needing to take care of himself. Having that someone to pack him a lunch and look after him in such a way made him feel loved and safe.
Of course he'd never take his mask off in front of you. He never took it off for anyone, there were no hard feelings. He preferred his anonymity and you are completely okay with it.
You never asked to see him without the mask because
well,
you just didn't. That was his privacy and you weren't one to invade it unless he would offer or if he were to be ready.
You two were both very patient with each other and that helped build a healthy and trustful relationship.
You also didn't mind not knowing what he really looked like. You first fell in love with who he was as a person, not his physical attributes.
When he did show you what he looked like unmasked, it was ironically during a make-out session.
(He low-key planned it out)
"Bloody hell, this thing is getting in the way." He'd say as the balaclava kept slipping down and shielding his lips from yours.
Thats when he finally pulled the felt which covered his features off, taking you by surprise.
The face-paint was still there, but his beautiful features were completely exposed to you.
He definitely got flustered at just how much you were examining his face.
"You look like you've seen a Ghost, darling."
That snapped you out of it, earning a chuckle from you before you two were sucking each others faces off again without that irritation from the fabric.
While nothing was said in the moment, by the time you two were done, you'd already begun to gush about how handsome he looked. You'd cup his face in your hands like he would to you and place kisses on his nose, forehead, cheeks, everywhere. He'd just look away in embarrassment.
"Yeah, yeah, take a picture, it'll last longer... PLEASE DON'T-"
The hard, confident Simon you knew became a blushy idiot and you loved it.
He was your Simon
__________________
NSFW
Before you two had any 'alone time' together, he'd always make sure there's a large water bottle or an electrolyte drink on the bedside table because, man, his guy has a lot of stamina and a high sex drive.
He could easily shoot a some loads into you over the course of a couple of hours.
You couldn't count how many times he'd make you cum over those few hours as you'd be a babbling mess by the end of it. No thoughts, just getting dicked down.
He wasn't exactly rough, but definitely not gentle. He'll be pounding into you like it was your last nights together for a while. And yeah, sometimes it was, so you two would need to make the most of it.
He wasn't one to inflict physical pain to you either unless it was the occasional slap on the ass or thighs.
He was one to grab onto you though. He'll grab onto any piece of your body he can.
Doggy? Bent over a table? Riding? He'll be digging his fingers into your fleshy hips.
Steamy make-out session? Or just feeling possessive? He'll gladly grab onto your thighs or wrap his arms around your waist.
The boy loves holding onto you, especially when he's in heat, leaving maybe just a few red marks from him gripping onto you so tightly. Maybe even a few scratch marks.
Missionary would definitely be his favourite position.
He'd be able to stare into that pretty face of yours for eternity if his life depended on it.
Missionary also lets him hold your hand as he pounds you into the mattress. The feeling of you squeezing his hand as tightly as you can while you cum makes him go absolutely feral.
Simon wouldn't make all that much noise in bed. Though when he's feeling desperate, he can't shut himself up. He'll let out soft moans and groans and growls into your ear just to let you know how good you're making him feel.
He also would love seeing your mouth full of his cock. The faces you'd make up at him as it slides down you throat could make him cum instantly.
Moan his name and he will also cum instantly.
"Oh, fuck- Simon~!"
He'll start pounding into you like never before, chasing both of your orgasms.
He’ll always make sure that you’re left satisfied. No point in pounding into you if you’re not going to be enjoying it the entire time.
He'd probably cum a lot too. Thick strands would shoot inside you or into your mouth, struggling to stay inside. He'd probably have a thing for pushing his fingers inside your hole to make sure his cum stays inside you.
He's a top and a soft dom so he'd have a bit of trouble getting used to bottoming and/or subbing. He wouldn't turn it away, not for you. But it would need some getting used to for him.
If he's subbing, you could very easily get him to start begging once he gets lost in the pleasure. Though he'd definitely feel embarrassed after. He's a grown, dominant, military man who engages in the most brutal and gore-y activities. He wouldn't have ever believed himself a couple of years back if the future Simon had told him he'll be begging his partner to let him cum as they jerked him off in the slowest, most torturous way.
If you two hadn't seen each other in a while, he'd be pushing you against the wall in an instant with your thighs on either side of him. He'd be practically begging you again to let him fuck you, and you'd of course let him.
Breeding kink? For sure. He LOVES to cum inside you and fill you up.
"F-Fucking hell, look at you, doll, completely stuffed." He'll say as he cums into you for the third or fourth time that night. Your entire body would for sure be shaking at that point.
Of course he’d be affected by the overstimulation as some point as well, he’d begin stuttering every now and again each time his cock would throb inside you.
He'd slam into you with such force, you'll be sobbing tears of pleasure by the time you two were done.
You'll often become extremely tired from sex from the sheer amount of stamina this man has, it can't be said enough.
This man will gladly take you to your limit, but the moment you show signs of passing out or feeling unwell, he'll stop and make sure you're okay, giving you some water and something to boost your blood sugar so you’re not passing out on him. He's not one to take such advantage of you while you're unconscious, and you respect him a lot for that.
Post-sex includes so much cuddling. He'll apologise for accidentally hurting you or if he was too rough and make sure you're all cleaned up and had water before you two head to bed or for a nap.
Post-morning-sex would include him bringing breakfast to you in bed which you thought was the most adorable thing ever.
Your legs would be jelly by the time you two were done, so just trying to make it to the bathroom would be a whole challenge.
Simon would always either carry you or provide you will that stability, it was sweet. He'd hold onto your waist as tightly as he could to make sure you wouldn't fall while your knees would give in.
He was very buff so it would be pretty easy to keep you from falling to the ground.
He'll make sure you're all squeaky clean, hydrated, and fed before anything else.
He truely was the best boyfriend you could ask for.
***************
I loved writing this so much, I'm about to go scream into my pillow. Goodnight, everyone <3
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stawbeemilk · 9 days
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⤷ when they're jealous – hq
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✩ characters: various
✩ warnings: none
✩ a/n: sorry for being so inactive lately, i've been busy working on my ac island hehe
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⭑ gets possessive
this guy is definitely the jealous type. as much as he tries not to, he always ends up letting his emotions get the best of him, and whenever he happens to catch someone else hitting on you he can't help but become all possessive over you. once he notices them getting a little too close for his liking he won't hesitate to approach the two of you, immediately interrupting the conversation by asking you who they are, and making sure to refer to you by a pet name as a not so subtle way of letting the other person know exactly who you belong to. gets super clingy with you afterwards, refusing to leave your side and making sure everyone around you knows that you're his.
⤷ kageyama, yaku, kuroo, yahaba, semi, futakuchi, atsumu
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⭑ acts unbothered
pretends he doesn't care, but on the inside he's furious. he can't help but narrow his eyes at the other person, watching as you erupt into laughter at one of their jokes— even though it wasn't really that funny. once the interaction is over he'll try his best to keep up the act, finding himself becoming more reserved than usual as he attempts to hide the fact that someone else flirting with you made him far more irritated than he’d like to admit. it isn't until you call him out on his obvious jealousy that he gets all embarrassed, shocked that you noticed so easily because he genuinely believed that he was being subtle. he will probably try to deny it, but deep down he knows it's pointless as you somehow manage to always see right through him.
⤷ tsukishima, kenma, kunimi, sakusa, washio, suna, shirabu
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⭑ ready to throw hands
will definitely try to fight anyone who dares to hit on you, to the point where he's basically your own personal guard dog. not only will he refuse to tolerate anyone flirting with you, he won't let them get away with looking at what's his either. as soon as he realises someone has been staring at you for a little too long, he'll be quick to wrap an arm around your waist and pull you into him, all while glaring daggers at the person who had the nerve to shamelessly check you out like that. he might get a little defensive about it afterwards, especially if you start teasing him, but whenever someone starts eyeing you up and down like that he just can't stop himself from getting protective of you, simply because he hates the thought of anyone making you uncomfortable.
⤷ kyotani, iwaizumi, tanaka, konoha, aran, nishinoya, matsukawa
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⭑ feels insecure
it's not that he believes you would ever be unfaithful, because he trusts you completely— it's just that deep down he thinks you're too good for him and that you could do way better. when he sees someone else trying to flirt with you he can't help but feel a little nervous, insecure thoughts plaguing his mind as he begins worrying that he's not good enough for you. he probably won't say anything to you about it afterwards, but you don't miss the sad look in his eyes or the way he appears to be trapped in his own thoughts. you know by now that he needs a lot of reassurance due to his tendency to overthink, and so you always remind him that he's good enough at times like these when you know he needs to hear it the most.
⤷ akaashi, koganegawa, asahi, hanamaki, tendou, yamaguchi
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⭑ super touchy with you
whenever he gets jealous he finds himself unable to keep his hands off you. he's definitely the type to wrap his arms around your waist when you're in the middle of a conversation with someone else, hugging you from behind and leaning his head on your shoulder. it always manages to catch you off guard, wondering why he's being so affectionate with you all of a sudden, but with the way he scowls at the other person and pulls you into him it doesn't take you long to figure out that he's jealous. he won't be able to keep his hands off you for the rest of the day, asking you for cuddles or wanting to hold your hand, and pouting when you start making fun of him for it.
⤷ bokuto, oikawa, sugawara, osamu, hinata, lev, daishou
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⤷ please do not repost my works on any other sites!
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starry-eyes-love · 3 months
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Darlin', You're Beautiful
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Pairing | Best Friend Joel Miller x Curvy F!Reader, AU (no outbreak)
Summary | After having been stood up from another date yet again, you went to the park with Joel Miller, your best friend, to hang out. You're lost in your own head, not believing that you're beautiful when Joel reminds you of where beauty truly lies, from within.
Warnings | 18+ Minors DNI, age gap (she's mid 20s, he's early 40s), reference to reader being curvy, language, self esteem issues and discussions, terms of endearment (honey, sugar, baby, darlin'), heavy kissing, sexual tension a bit, brief reference to smut, fluff.
Word Count:  2.6K
A/N: This one comes from a space that's been taking up my personal headspace for far too long. She’s a little emotional, but that’s ok. Remember, beauty comes from within. Enjoy :) 
Joel's words lingered in the air, “baby, I’ve wanted you for so fucking long,” he whispered, while slowly thrusting inside of you. He was giving you a gentle reminder that beauty, true beauty, was seen from inside a person's soul. 
Main Masterlist
Joel leaned back against the old oak tree in the park, the soft rustle of the leaves above him providing a calming backdrop. His heart was pounding in his chest, nerves taking root in his body. Man, she’s beautiful, the most beautiful woman I’ve ever known.  And you were, you were beautiful.  You were beautiful because you had a beautiful soul.  
For all of your life, you didn’t believe that you were beautiful.  Society had a specific version of what beauty was, and you felt like you never lived up to that expectation. You were not skinny with a flat stomach, you had a little bit of a tummy on you.  You were sitting in the park, watching the Texan sunset with your best friend, Joel Miller, and you were silently scolding yourself yet again. Your second date with a guy last night didn’t go as planned, the man never showed up.  Somehow once guys saw that you weren’t the super skinny woman with a big chest, they didn’t want to be with you, and they’d bail on you every chance that they had.  
Joel hated seeing you like this, berating and belittling yourself over not being what boys thought were beautiful.  And that's who you were attempting to date, boys.  Joel, being a man in his early 40s, saw women differently than what men in their 20s did.  You weren’t a baby in life, being in your mid 20s yourself, but the men that you attempted to date were.  They were too egotistical, caring more about getting laid and the final score at the end of the night than treating a woman with any real respect. 
So after sitting with his back against the tree for a bit, and taking in the beautiful Texan sunset, Joel tipped his baseball cap back slightly to look at your face. As he stared at you, he noticed that your once warm eyes that were full of life and happiness, now looked lost. Without giving it another thought, Joel opened his mouth and said the thing that he’s wanted to say to you for a long time. 
"Darlin', there's been somethin' on my mind that I wanted to tell ya," he stated, his voice heavy with that slow Southern drawl.
Glancing over at Joel with curiosity you said, “What is it, Joel?"
While grabbing a blade of grass and beginning to twirl it between his fingers, a nervous habit that he had, he said "well, sugar, I've been thinkin' a lot about the type of men that you’ve been tryin’ to date. And well honey, they’re just little boys. Little boys who think they know what’s right for a woman, but they don’t. They don’t know what’s right for ya.”
You told him “ok” in a voice that you didn't quite recognize as your own, one that was so meek and mild. You weren’t the girl who usually got down on herself so much. But recently it had been too much with being stood up on dates, or just being told no in the most embarrassing and rude way possible.  Usually a few situations like this wouldn’t bother you, but recently, it has become too much. 
Joel, shaking his head, looked back over at you and said “Darlin’, when are ya going to stop believin’ all the garbage these boys say, and start believin’ in something that matters?”
“What matters Joel, huh?” you said, straightening up and shooting him a dirty look with your eyes. This was not the conversation that you wanted to have right now, one that discussed your choices.  Yes, Joel was right, but you didn’t want to hear him say it right now.  You didn’t want him to rub your nose in the fact that you couldn’t seem to pick a good guy to go out with ever. 
“Ya gotta start believin’ it honey, that you’re beautiful, and not waiting on some dumbass guy to say it to you. Y/n, you are beautiful.” Joel said, looking at you tenderly, trying to communicate the feelings that he’s felt for you inside for a long time.
You just stared at Joel, pondering why he would go to this length to say this to you. In the last 5 years that the two of you have been friends, not once did Joel Miller ever say that you were beautiful.  It’s just not something that the two of you have ever talked about before. And if you were being honest, you wondered why now he chose to bring it up. 
"Joel, you're sweet. But come on, let's be real. I'm not exactly the definition of beautiful." you said, looking over at him.
Joel sighed, trying to make you understand what he saw. "You may not see it darlin’, but I do. I see it every time you smile with the way your eyes light up. Or the way you snort when you laugh, especially when you find something really funny. When you talk ‘bout things that you love, I see you open your heart up to the person you’re talkin’ to. Or even that cute little blush that ya get when you get embarrassed. Beauty isn't just about appearance darlin’; it's about the way you carry yourself, the kindness in your heart, and the way you make other people feel."
Shifting uncomfortably, clearly not used to receiving these types of compliments from anyone, but especially a man and your best friend. "Joel, you're exaggerating. I appreciate it, but I'm not the type of girl people describe as beautiful."
Joel once again shook his head. He wanted you to see what he saw, the beauty that you had within you. "That's where you're wrong darlin’. You have this unique charm that goes beyond what people think is beautiful. It's about you being genuine, and baby, you are as genuine as they come."
“Well, I’ve never felt like it.” You looked over at Joel with soft eyes, wanting to believe everything that he was saying to you.
“Well that’s what’s wrong darlin’. You are the best type of beauty possible.  Beauty of the soul. And baby, I can’t get enough of it if I’m being honest.”
“Joel, what are you- what are you saying?” you asked softly, with slight irritation in your voice at how in-depth this conversation has gone. 
Joel scooted closer to you, and tucked a loose strand of hair behind your ear. “I’m saying that it’s your uniqueness that makes you beautiful darlin’. That it’s something rare to find, that you’re something rare to find. And baby, I find you incredibly attractive because of it."
A soft blush tinted your cheeks at Joel saying that you were attractive. "Do you- do you really mean it?" you asked, trying not to get your hopes up, but secretly hoping Joel was flirting with you.  Sure, you two have been friends for five years, but you’ve secretly have had a crush on Joel Miller ever since the start of your friendship. You didn’t think he’d ever look at you the way that you hoped, that he wanted to be with you in the capacity of being ‘more than friends.’  You always thought that he liked women that didn’t have curves like you did. 
Joel looking at you with hooded eyes said, "Baby, I've spent enough time with ya to know that there's more to beauty than what meets the eye. It's about the way you make people feel, the way you make me feel.  That genuine kindness you show me and others. That’s what makes your truly beautiful darlin’."
A thoughtful silence hung between the two of you, as you absorbed his words. It wasn't that you didn't believe him. But when people, specifically other men, have made you feel less than beautiful for many years, it took its toll. You couldn’t help but slowly start to believe those inappropriate statements by others, when it was others that were constantly saying it to you that they didn’t find you beautiful or sexually attractive. 
"Joel, it's not that I don't appreciate your words, I do. It's just that, it's hard to change when other people are mean for so long, and where they have made me feel less than beautiful as a woman.”
Joel slowly nodded, understanding the depth of your silent struggle. After a moment he said, “I get that darlin'', I do, it's just that-” Joel found himself standing at the precipice of no return with you. After contemplating his choices, he decided to throw caution completely out of the window, and he decided to act on the feelings that he’s had with you for a long time.  Joel leaned forward and cupped your cheek, gently running his thumb up and down it. “If ya don't believe my words darlin'', then please believe this.” He then leaned forward and gently kissed you softly on the mouth.
What started out as a gentle, soft kiss quickly turned heated. You softly whimpered into his mouth when his one hand went to the back of your neck, that spurred something deep inside him. As soon as he heard you moan he took the kiss a step further and gently ran his tongue along the seam of your lips, asking you for access into your mouth. When you opened for him, he dove his tongue in and started a slow caress. Gentle and smooth strokes, back and forth, inside your mouth, against your tongue. You two were doing a slow dance of passion and love behind your kiss. Nothing rushed, just gentle exploration.
When you moaned into his mouth, that’s when caution once again completely went out the window. A switch inside of Joel had flipped, and his kissing became more heated. Joel gripped the back of your head in a firm hold and tilted your chin up so he could lean forward and deepen the kiss into your mouth. It was at this moment that you realized two very important things. One, Joel Miller was an excellent kisser. And two, you wanted to sleep with your best friend really bad.
As you pulled away, gasping for air, you heard Joel let out a low growl. When you looked over at him he had very dark eyes.  His pupils were blown wide, and the air around you two crackled with sexual tension.  Joel moved back towards you and started kissing down your neck, nipping and biting over your pulse points and the areas of your neck that he knew were your most sensitive zones. “No one's ever kissed me like that before” you said, while moaning softly at what Joel was doing.
“That's a damn shame darlin''. A beautiful woman like yourself should be kissed like that all the goddamn time.” He said while sucking on your neck and then running his tongue over the love bite that he just made to soothe it. 
“I want more” you gasped, moaning again at Joel’s minstrations on your neck.
“Good, you should want more.” He said, moving to the other side of your neck and continuing his exploration. Joel was trying to find out what made you moan, squirm, and call out to him; making sure to keep doing that to intensify what he wanted to do again, and that was kiss you once again. He wanted to make sure that you knew without a doubt what he felt for you, and that any real man would know how to make a woman feel beautiful.  And goddamn, you were hot as hell and so sexy that he barely could think straight. 
With a slight smile, you gently shook your head while pulling away from him and finally admitting out loud to him, the thing that has been your biggest secret. “No Joel, I want more from you, with you. I have for a very long time.” You then reached out and gently cupped Joel’s cheek, running your thumb over his patchy beard. 
Joel looked at you with intense eyes, heart pounding hard and fast in his chest at the realization of what you were asking. Finally, after all these years you wanted him the same way that he wanted you. When you two first started hanging out he didn’t think you’d like him in a boyfriend type of way, as all your interactions were more based on friendship than anything else.  Now he felt stupid, hooking up with random women periodically over the years, having you play wingman with him at the bar, thinking that you never wanted more. I’m not gonna fuck this up anymore with her, he thought, focusing on showing you what he wanted.
Joel leaned forward and gently whispered in your ear, “well darlin’, why didn't ya say something. How ‘bout this, I take ya back to my house and show you what a real man does to make a woman feel so fucking sexy. Would you like that baby, for me to show you?”
When Joel pulled back to look at you he saw that you eagerly shook your head yes for him.  He tsked at you while resting his forehead against yours and said with his eyes closed, “Now come on baby, ya know better than that. Use your words, darlin’ tell me what ya want, please.”
When Joel pulled away from you gently, you nodded your head and then leaned in. Your mouth was right next to his ear when you gently whispered “fuck me Joel, that’s what I want. I want this, I want you. Help me forget about all those other men.”
Joel's eyes glazed over at your admittance. Pulling back he whispered “filthy girl” but then gave his own head a little nod, telling you that he understood what you wanted.  When Joel stood up, he reached out to help you up.  As the two of you walked back to his truck, he laced his hand into yours, showing you how much he actually cared. Once inside his truck, Joel kissed you passionately yet again, telling you with his actions of what he intended to do with you when he got back home. As he pulled away he then ran his hand through your hair for a moment, enjoying the quiet intimacy that was present.
 “I'm gonna treat ya right baby, the way you should’ve been treated all along. My only wish is that I wish I would've done this a lot sooner. For that honey, I’m really sorry.” And with that admittance Joel gave you another tender kiss on your lips. Once he settled into the driver's seat of his truck, you silently reached over and took his hand in yours. The 30 minute drive back to his house was done in silence.  But this silence for once wasn’t awkward, nothing with Joel ever was. You didn't know why you didn't see any of this feelings before, but now you were glad that the two of you communicated.
As the sun faded and dipped below the horizon, two souls were intertwined and connected. Joel's words lingered in the air, “baby, I’ve wanted you for so fucking long,” he whispered, while slowly thrusting inside of you. He was giving you a gentle reminder that beauty, true beauty, was seen from inside a person's soul. Joel spent the rest of his life, and yours, reminding you of this. And with each reminder it always ended the same way, you two wrapped up into each other’s arms. He told you each and every day how much he loved you, both inside and out, with saying just one simple sentence, “Darlin’, you’re beautiful.”  And you were, you were beautiful both inside out. Not because a man told you, but because you finally started to believe it yourself. 
The End
Taglist: @punkshort @shotgun-shelby @strawbunnyx @orcasoul @pedritoferg @chiogarza @jesfreedark @untamedheart81 @rainbow12346 @nandan11 @swiftpascal @eliza-8 @joeldjarin @vickie5446 @nastiasnow @staywildflowahchild @ratoonstown @l3laze @its-always-420-on-the-moon @kirsteng42
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permanentswaps · 10 days
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Pandemic Blues Pt. 2
Read Part 1 from @malebodyinvasion here.
After that first week, we swapped back, and true to my word, I made sure my stepson got his PlayStation as promised. He was thrilled, and I could see the excitement in his eyes as he unpacked it and began playing Call of Duty.
However, over the next few days, I found myself feeling disappointed to back in my own body. While I was still muscular and relatively good-looking, I couldn't help but compare myself to my stepson.
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His youthfulness, his energy, his effortless charm – I was so jealous of it now that I was no longer experiencing life through his eyes.
Every time I looked in the mirror, I couldn't shake off the feeling that something was off. I missed the strength and vitality that came with being Tom. I knew I needed to feel it again.
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"What do you say we swap again?" I said to Tom, who had just walked into the kitchen.
"What's in it for me?" he asked.
"Well, I know you've been looking to upgrade your wardrobe," I said. "How about $500 to go on a bit of a shopping spree for yourself?"
"I don't know," he said.
"How about I throw in an extra $200 so you can get that pair of trainers you've had your eye on too?"
He agreed.
As we downed the potions again, I was exhilarated to be back in his body. The rush of energy and vitality flooded over me once more, and for that moment, all my worries and insecurities melted away. It was like slipping into a perfectly tailored suit, every aspect fitting just right.
---
The next week was a whirlwind of excitement as I strutted around in the new clothes Tom had ordered for himself. Lucky for me, they were not only stylish but also quite revealing.
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Not only did it feel like I was dressed just like a young guy, I was also definitely showing off to Tom in my old body. On more than one occasion, I caught him staring at my ass and saw the outline of his hard dick through his shorts.  
Feeling mischievous, I decided to take things up a notch and texted photos of myself in the new clothes to Tom's friend Zack. Zack was super cute, and going through Tom's texts, I could tell he had a crush on me … or at least on Tom. The messages were all in good fun, of course, but I couldn't resist teasing him a little.
The playful banter and flirty exchanges added an extra layer of excitement to my week in Tom's body.
One night, feeling a surge of adrenaline and curiosity, I decided to sneak out of the house to go see Zack. As I made my way to his house, a mix of nerves and excitement coursed through my veins.
Hanging out in Zack's backyard, under the soft glow of the moon, we chatted for a bit, the gentle breeze carrying our words into the night.
"You know," Zack said with a playful smirk, "you're being more flirty than usual tonight. What's up?"
I chuckled nervously, trying to play it cool. "Oh, you know me," I replied with a shrug. "Just tired of denying myself the good things in life."
Zack's eyes sparkled with curiosity as he leaned in closer, his warmth enveloping me. "Well then," he said softly, "maybe it's time to embrace those good things."
Before I could respond, he pulled me close and kissed me. His lips were gentle yet filled with longing, and in that moment, time seemed to stand still. The world faded away as we lost ourselves in the sweetness of the moment.
As we pulled apart, breathless and exhilarated, Zack whispered, "I've been waiting to do that forever."
My heart skipped a beat as I looked into his eyes, feeling a rush of emotions flood over me. In that instant, I knew I wanted to see where things would go with him. There was something electric about the connection we shared, something that felt undeniably real and promising.
When I got home, I couldn't shake off the desire to prolong the swap just a bit longer. I scoured the internet for any possible solutions, but unfortunately, I couldn't find anything that I could do on my own. That meant I would have to convince Tom to swap again if I wanted to spend any more time with Zack.
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---
The next morning I got to work on convincing Tom to let me be him for another week.
"Hey, Tom," I began tentatively, trying to gauge his reaction. "I've been thinking... what do you say we do another swap?"
Tom raised an eyebrow, clearly intrigued but cautious. "Another swap? What's in it for me this time?"
I took a deep breath, knowing I had to make it worth his while. "I'll give you $2000," I said, hoping the offer would catch his attention.
Tom's eyes widened in surprise. "$2000? That's a lot of money."
"Yeah, I know," I replied eagerly. "But think about it – you'll get to experience life in my body for another week, and you can use the money for whatever you want."
Tom hesitated, clearly mulling over the offer. "I don't know... it's tempting, but..."
"But what?" I pressed, sensing his uncertainty.
"It's just... I don't know if it's worth it," he admitted reluctantly.
I racked my brain, trying to come up with a way to sweeten the deal. "Okay, how about this," I suggested, desperation creeping into my voice. "I'll throw in an extra $500, and you can have full access to my car for the entire week. Sound good?"
Tom's eyes lit up at the mention of the extra cash and access to my car. "Deal," he said, extending his hand to seal the agreement.
I grinned, relieved that he had agreed. "Great! Let's do this."
As we prepared to drink the potions once more, I couldn't help but feel a rush of excitement coursing through me. This second swap was going to be even more thrilling than the last.
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---
That week, I found myself sneaking out every night to see Zack. The thrill of our secret rendezvous filled me with excitement, but as the days passed, a sense of dread began to creep in.
On the second to last night before we were due to swap back, I couldn't shake off the feeling of desperation gnawing at me. I needed to find a way to make this swap permanent..
I spent hours scouring through online forums where I had bought the potion, searching for any clue or solution. And then, just when I was about to lose hope, I stumbled across something – a glimmer of hope: a testimonial from two users who had found a way to make the swap permanent.
My heart raced as I read through the testimonial, each word igniting a spark of hope within me. According to their experience, if they were having sex when they swapped back, it would confuse the direction of their essences, sending them back into their new bodies and rendering the potion ineffective moving forward.
I had my plan. It was risky, but it was the only chance I had to hold on to this newfound happiness. With determination coursing through my veins, I knew that I would do whatever it took to make it work.
---
The following night, I tiptoed into my old bedroom where I saw my old body naked and asleep in bed. I slowly stripped off my own clothes, took a deep breath, and climbed under the covers next to him.
Turning on my side, I backed my bare ass up against his crotch. As I did that, I could fell my old cock become hard and rub up against me. I was prepared to accept it. I had already loosened myself up with some toys and lubed up my hole. I wanted to make this process as easy for myself as possible and make sure Tom didn’t have any time to overthink about what we were doing.
Half asleep, Tom began to feel up my muscles, grabbed around my thin waist, and rubbed the tip of his cock against my hole
As I felt him lined up, I thrust my hips backwards onto my former dick and felt him slide inside.
Tom, who was now fully awake, seemed a bit confused at first. But as I turned my head back to look towards him and bit my lip, he moaned in pleasure and began to pick up the pace.
“Fuck, my ass is so tight” he said, as he continued thrusting and leaned over to gently kiss me on the shoulder.
We went at it for a while and eventually, I found myself on top riding cowboy. It was then that I started to feel a bit lightheaded, just as I had the past few times we’d swapped back.
I leaned down, and kissed my former self, before whispering in his ear “thanks so much for the sexy body.” We both blacked out for just a second and then when we came to, we were still in the right positions. That was enough to send me over the edge to completion, I was Tom forever.
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choochooboss · 1 year
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Submas sketchdump! Vol. 1
April-June 2022
Literally dumping all the presentable works as promised, whether I'm proud of them or not! This is where I started, even before the first thing I posted online (That subway station one). Many of these are not on Twitter yet so there's lots to see!
The top piece above the header is my very first digital Submas artwork!! I never finished it bc I didn't know how to pull my vision of as I wanted & started modeling the train and didn't finish that either, whoops! I really want to remake this later and make it super cool!
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^^^ My reaction to breaking 500 likes & 100 followers in a single day with my first tweet (the battle subway one) all the way back in May!! I was completely floored by all the attention, oh how it skyrocketed my excitement and anxiety! Crazy times, I was so super nervous to be there with so many amazing artists and doubted if I could ever survive there ahahah!! Many had joined the community much much earlier than me, so I had arrived with a late train to PLA/neo Submas hype!
Next up is a bunch of stuff I haven't posted before:
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One of my fav sketches! Been saving this for so long bc I really really want to finish this one day!
One of the first submas sketches with an actual story behind it! The subway bosses are running late for their flight because they didn't pass the safety check! The irony!! This would never happen as bosses are always on schedule. But Emmet hadn't noticed a wild Joltik hiding under his coat, so he set up the alarm and they got examined and interrogated of smuggling! How embarrassing for them! The bosses resolved the situation by catching the Joltik, but will they be able to catch their flight anymore?? Maybe if Elesa can distract the stuerts performing the safety protocol for a minute!
More sketchbook stuff...
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In case you can't make any sense of it, Emmet's dreaming of different combinations of pokémon. Meanwhile Ingo snores louder than the train! HONK SHOO!
Top 7 every submas fan draws at some point!
Submas trademark posing
submas sleeping in a train
sad Emmet
Emmet with Joltik
Ingo with a cool solo pose
Emmet being chaotic & Ingo reacting to it
a bunch of mirrored submas poses
I sure have a full bingo card lmao, most of them you can see here XD
Next up is a sad man...
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Stay strong our friends!
My typical sketchbook pages, crammed and messy as usual. x)
Post-PLA exploration:
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A few examples of how my pencil sketches evolve.
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I've done so much art experimenting with submas. I really like this black & white painting but I don't think I'll finish it anytime soon.
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Where did you go?
The way I draw the twins' faces has changed a lot. They started with softer features and somewhat neutral emotions, because I wasn't as familiar with them or comfortable drawing them yet. Now there's hundreds of submas sketches, and they still keep evolving! My style is also kinda hard to pull off well, so their features differ from picture to picture.
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This one was inspired by some submas music videos, can't recall their names anymore. The glowing eerie eyes and yellow&orange + black&white color schemes were neat!
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I keep telling myself I need to draw more butlers, these twinks look so lean and neat and have more color and are posh with their monocles and have fun tailcoats!
(...why eyeglasses are not called binocles??)
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I was there for the vinegar chaos. Good times!
That's all for now, I hope you got something fun out of this! Still got loads more art to share but I'll save them for another time. Next round I'll bring in my first submas comic!
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steddieas-shegoes · 1 year
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hi! i love your works so much and i have a request ^^ i wanted to ask if you could do a jealous and/or possessive eddie? maybe where steve and eddie are super close to finally admitting they like each other and just need one more push or something, or they're just newly dating. they're both at a gay bar, and steve's been receiving lots of stares and heated gazes from some of the ppl there? maybe a person was brave enough to try but eddie's right beside him watching the entire interaction.
i've come across a fair share amount of jealous/possessive steve in steddie stories and i wanted to see it being eddie for a change. tysm in advance and i can't wait to read the other requests with your amazing writing <3
I LOVE possessive Eddie!!! I really only see it in Kas!Eddie or vampire Eddie situations and I wish it was written more for just regular old human Eddie who just has entirely too much love for Steve to contain his emotions when someone else tries to make a move. I hope you like this little thing (2500 words!) I came up with and the other requests I've been putting out so far! - Mickala ❤️
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Robin convinced them she needed support.
Support Steve’s ass.
She was doing just fine from the moment they stepped in the door of this place.
So fine, in fact, she’d abandoned him and Eddie before they even got their first round of drinks brought to them.
Steve sat at the table with Eddie, awkwardly watching as people kept dancing and drinking and making out in dark corners of the bar.
He tried not to look too much, though. He didn’t want anyone to think he wasn’t comfortable here.
Quite the opposite, actually.
He’d been here a couple of times with just Robin: once before he figured out he was into men, once before he figured out he was into Eddie, and once more before this where he tried very hard to be into Eddie and failed.
But Eddie had insisted on coming when he overheard them talking about it, saying he hadn’t been here since high school and could use a night in a place where he could just be himself.
As if he wasn’t always obnoxiously (and beautifully) himself.
Robin had given Eddie a Look, but nodded in agreement, saying it would be awesome to have both her favorite guys there.
Which rubbed Steve a little wrong because he was her only favorite guy.
But he got over it because now Eddie was his only company, probably for the entire night going off of the way the girl with Robin was staring at her.
Ogling her.
Steve sighed. Eddie sighed.
They looked at each other and laughed.
“She do this to you every time?”
“No, usually we stick together. Must feel brave since you’re here with me.”
“Awww, she trusts me.”
Steve rolled his eyes, but there was probably more truth to that than he cared to admit.
Robin was often afraid to leave him alone, but she never hesitated if Eddie was with him.
He felt people staring at him, but he ignored it. He wasn’t here to find anyone and it would be silly to even try knowing that Eddie was right there.
But he’d be lying if he said it didn’t feel good to have people checking him out. He used to thrive on it in high school, feeling seen by anyone was better than being seen by no one.
Then, he hated it. He wanted to be invisible and he wanted everyone to focus on anyone and anything else in the room. He got his wish most of the time.
Until Eddie.
Eddie always included him in everything, pointing out when he was being quiet or moody, asking him questions to involve him in conversations, making sure he understood what Dustin was saying which was a challenge often.
He would touch his arm when he passed by him on the way to grab a drink from the kitchen or let their thighs touch on the couch on movie nights.
He let him come over after work on the nights he was too riled up, needing to let out some of his energy with a walk, but being too scared to do it alone.
So Eddie saw him, and made others see him, and he didn’t always love it, but he accepted it.
Tonight felt different, though.
All these eyes on him meant that people found him attractive, maybe wanted to dance with him or bring him home. If Eddie weren’t here, he’d maybe give it a shot with someone, try to find a way out of this hole he dug himself into with the first guy he’d admitted to himself he had feelings for.
But he also felt Eddie’s eyes on him, practically burning a hole through the side of his face every time he looked out at the crowd.
He felt heat crawling up his neck, to his cheeks.
Having all of Eddie’s attention was a lot for anyone, but especially Steve, who frequently thought about what it would be like to have Eddie’s attention on him in bed, or in the shower, or on the couch, or the pool, or-
“Did you want another drink?”
Steve looked down at the drink in his hand. He’d barely finished half of it, so he didn’t really know why Eddie was asking unless he just needed an excuse to get up.
“Um. No thanks. Probably should just have one anyway.”
“Sure.”
Eddie got up with his empty glass and started walking towards the bar.
Almost as soon as Eddie was gone, a taller man in a suit was taking his place at the table.
“Well, hi there, honey. Never seen you here before. First time?”
The guy was older, mid-thirties at least, and probably not the type of guy Steve would want to experiment with. But he was flirting, and he was kind of cute.
Steve could let himself enjoy a little casual flirting, right? It wouldn’t have to lead to anything.
“No, but I don’t come often.”
Steve rested his arms on the table, head in his hand. He grinned at the man, that Harrington charm practically beaming off of him.
“You could come tonight if you wanted to join me in the back.”
That was smooth. Sleazy, but smooth.
Steve didn’t drop his grin, but he shook his head.
“I don’t think I’m interested in just hooking up in the bathroom. Maybe you could buy me a drink?”
He had no intention of drinking another drink, but he figured this guy would lose interest if he showed he was more needy.
He was wrong.
The guy practically tripped over his feet to stand up from the booth.
“What would you like?”
“Oh. Uh.”
“He’s good, man. How about you go buy a drink for someone interested?”
Eddie came out of nowhere. Seriously, Steve had just seen him at the bar a few seconds before he spoke.
“Is this your boyfriend or something?”
Steve cleared his throat awkwardly as Eddie stood taller, more intimidating.
“Does it matter? I’m asking you nicely to go.”
“I don’t think it’s up to you. I asked him.”
Eddie looked like he wanted to punch the guy, and Steve could admit to himself silently that he wanted to see it.
But he didn’t quite understand why Eddie was reacting like this; He’d assumed Eddie would want to try to hook up with someone while he was here and wouldn’t want to spend all his time with Steve.
“Steve? Do you wanna get a drink with this guy?”
No, he didn’t. He hadn’t even before Eddie came back. But a part of him had to wonder if maybe Eddie’s reaction was just to protect Steve from an older guy.
“I actually have to drive us back home so I probably shouldn’t have another drink. Thanks though.”
The guy mumbled something before turning and leaving, shaking his head as he walked to the bar.
Eddie slid into the booth next to him instead of across from him, letting most of their sides touch.
Steve couldn’t help the way his body naturally curled into Eddie’s, the comfort and safety of his body drawing Steve in without effort.
It should have ended there. Steve should have just let himself stay rested against Eddie’s side until Robin was done.
He did for a minute, but then his brain decided it needed explanations.
“What was wrong with that guy buying me a drink?”
Eddie was quiet for a moment, his body tense against Steve’s.
“I just don’t think he was the right kind of person to be buying you a drink. You deserve better than that.”
Steve’s brows furrowed.
Eddie didn’t know the guy, he could’ve been really nice. Other than the propositioning as his first line, he seemed like he was willing to do whatever Steve wanted to get more time with him.
“Who is the right kind of person then?”
“Someone younger. Maybe someone who doesn’t wear a damn suit to a gay bar. This is a casual place, there’s no need to flaunt your super important job. Plus, he could see your drink was still half full, he should’ve known you didn’t want one.”
“You offered me a drink before you got up.”
“That’s different.”
“How?”
“Because I’m not trying to get you drunk to sleep with me.”
Yeah, and wasn’t that a shame?
Steve dropped it. It wasn’t worth arguing with Eddie and he didn’t want to ruin any of the fun they could have.
“Should we dance?”
Eddie pulled away and looked at him like he’d grown a second head.
“You want to dance with me?”
“Why not? We’ve been abandoned by Robin and the music isn’t bad.”
The music wasn’t bad to Steve. Eddie, however, was suffering through it as it was, and that was without having to dance to it.
“Pleeeeease?” Steve pouted at Eddie, eyes wide.
“You can’t make that face. It’s not fair.”
Steve kept making the face because being fair wasn’t something he cared about.
Eddie stood up, holding his hand out towards Steve to help him stand from the table.
Steve took it, ignoring the way he wanted to collapse against Eddie the second he stood up.
They made it to the dance floor, where a surprising amount of people were dancing in pairs and small groups, enjoying the fact that they could safely here.
Just when Steve turned to Eddie, the music changed to Head Over Heels by Tears For Fears.
Steve tried not to take it as a sign.
Eddie suddenly looked even more nervous, like he’d planned on maybe getting away with just jumping around to the music and now he couldn’t.
Just when Steve was going to give him an out, another guy, this one younger, but not as nice looking, wrapped his arm around Steve’s shoulder.
“How ‘bout we dance, sugar?”
The guy was drunk.
Steve wasn’t interested in ruining his favorite song by dancing with this drunk guy.
“He’s busy,” Eddie said firmly.
The guy backed up a bit, but still had his hand against Steve’s arm, resting there with enough of a grip to keep him upright.
“Sorry, you got somethin’ against me dancin’ with him?”
“Yeah, that’s why I just said he’s busy.”
Eddie pushed the guy’s hand off of Steve’s arm and put his own around Steve’s waist, pulling him against his side with no room for air or argument.
Steve tried to catch his breath, his heart skipping a beat and his lungs exhaling instead of inhaling.
“Maybe you should let him say if he’s busy or not.”
Steve was missing his favorite song to argue with a guy he wasn’t interested in when he could be dancing with Eddie.
Unacceptable.
“I’m dancing with him. Find someone else.”
The guy rolled his eyes and walked away.
Eddie turned and adjusted his arms so they rested on Steve’s hips.
Steve didn’t know what to do.
“Have you never slow danced before, King Steve?”
“Uh. Just once.”
“Oh? Let me help you then.”
Eddie took his hands in his own and gently placed them around his neck, pulling himself closer to Steve when his hands found his hips again.
“This okay?”
“Yeah.”
Steve wasn’t sure how this was happening, how this was real.
He just knew he didn’t want it to end.
He rested his head against Eddie’s shoulder, letting himself enjoy what would probably be his only chance at dancing with Eddie for the rest of his life.
“Why do you keep sending people away?”
Why was Steve determined to ruin tonight with his stupid fucking questions?
“What do you mean?”
“It just seems like you don’t wanna share.”
Eddie didn’t respond.
Steve looked up at him, but his face was hard to read in the darkness of the bar.
“Eds?”
“I don’t.” Eddie cleared his throat. “I don’t wanna share you. I like having you all to myself. Sorry if I’ve ruined your night.”
He started to pull away and Steve panicked. He couldn’t say that and then leave.
“What do you mean? You haven’t ruined anything. I wanted to spend it with you, anyways.”
Eddie was searching his eyes, looking for any sign of a lie.
“Steve, I-” The song changed, but it was another slow song. They kept slowly rocking and staring at each other. “I have to tell you something. You’re probably gonna hate me and wanna leave me here in Indy.”
Steve gulped. Could he possibly have feelings for Steve?
“I uh. I sent them away because I was jealous.”
“What? Why?”
“Because I love you so fucking much I don’t know what to do with it all the time! Sometimes I hide in the bathroom during movie nights so I can scream into the towels. Do you know how ridiculous that is? I’ve even been caught by Max before and she promised not to say anything if I gave her $20.”
“Oh.”
Oh? What the hell Steve, say something else.
“So, I get it if you hate me. I mean, I don’t know how this happened and I have no right to send potential dates away because I want to keep you to myself.”
Steve leaned up and placed a kiss on Eddie’s cheek.
“I’m glad you got jealous.”
Eddie was blushing now.
“What?”
“If you hadn’t been jealous, you probably wouldn’t have told me all this, would you?”
“No, I guess not.”
“You know what helps with jealousy?”
Eddie looked down at him, more confused than ever.
Steve didn’t wait for him to respond.
“Making out in the bathroom of a gay bar.”
Eddie’s eyes practically bugged out of his head as he registered what Steve was saying.
“You wanna do that? With me?”
“Well, I certainly don’t wanna do it with anyone else. And you won’t let me do it with anyone else. So maybe we should do it together.”
Eddie grabbed his wrist and wordlessly led them to the bathroom in the back of the bar.
It wasn’t empty, but the single stall was available and Eddie made it pretty clear what their intentions were when he dragged Steve right into it, closing and locking the door only a second before his hot lips were on Steve’s.
It was better than what Steve could have possibly imagined, but still not enough.
Now that he knew Eddie wanted him, he wanted everything Eddie could give him.
And Eddie seemed to want to give it all to him.
His lips were almost too much, but Steve couldn’t get enough.
They weren’t even in a bathroom anymore, floating high above the clouds with happiness and contentment.
Until a knock on the stall door nearly made Steve give himself another concussion.
“Dingus One and Dingus Two! Super happy for you both, but it’s time to go.”
“Shit.”
“What time is it?”
“It’s nearly one in the morning and we agreed to leave by midnight. I got distracted by boobies.”
“Don’t we all,” Steve said, as Eddie let out a loud laugh.
They opened the stall door and Robin sighed.
“Fix your hair. I’ll be at the car.”
Steve looked in the mirror as she left the bathroom, smirking at Eddie’s reflection behind him in a similar state of disarray.
“Okay?”
“So okay.”
“You owe me a dance.”
“What? Why? We danced!”
“But it got interrupted. And I wanna dance with you.”
Eddie sighed, but smiled fondly at Steve.
“I’ll dance with you whenever you want, sweetheart.”
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fictionalmenmakemecry · 6 months
Text
Fuckin' with the Ecosystem- Chapter 3
Characters: Carmy Berzatto x Reader
Summary: With Carmy receiving Mikey's goodbye letter and you coming to understand the dire financial state of the restaurant, emotions are flying high. The nightmare doesn't let up until Carmy stumbles upon a fuck ton of money which leads him to ask you a very important question.
Warnings: Suicide mention, anxiety, cursing, alcohol.
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A/n: This took way longer than I originally planned. This chapter is a long one and there's a lot of emotions. I wanted to make sure I did it right. I'm really enjoying writing this series and honestly I could write about Carmy all day, everyday! I've got big plans coming for this story so let me know if you want me to start a tag list. Please let me know what you think! Any interaction is super helpful for me :)
If you haven't read, here's: Chapter 1 and Chapter 2
Enjoy!
It's Tuesday, and you're very aware of the days slipping through your fingers. When booking your flights, you thought two weeks would be too long but thought it wouldn't be bad to have some left over time to check out Chicago. Now that you're here, you were worried you weren't going to have enough time to go through everything with Carmy before heading back.
You arrive at the restaurant at 9 am to see Carmy already here and the others starting to filter in. As per usual, Marcus has been in since 7am, exploring the world of dessert making.
You take a sip from your hot coffee before reaching over for the leatherbound book on the other end of the desk. You've only flipped through it lightly not seeing anything that would be any importance. But you decided to have a deeper look to see if you're missing anything.
You open it and start scanning it. Each page consisted of a list of numbers with no order or description. Some of them crossed out, other not. The further you studied it, the more confused you got.
Was this the way Mikey was keeping track of this debts? You thought to yourself resting your forehead on your hand as you continued to flick through the pages.
"Carmy" you called out seeing him walk past the office.
He paused and leaned into the doorway, his hair more chaotic than usual.
"Uhh.. you a'ight?" You checking in on him noticing his messy state.
"Y-yeah, good, Why?" He questioned.
You shook your head slightly, remembering the actual reason why you stopped him.
"I'm going through Mikey's notebooks and seeing if there's any notes he may written down, and I stumbled on KBL electric, ring any bells?" You asked moving the book closer to him.
He leans down and furrowed his brows, pausing for a moment. His arm resting on the back of the chair you're sitting on.
"Uhh.." He raised his eyebrows.
His eyes continued to stare at the notebook like his mind was searching for the connection. You noticed his curls sticking up awkwardly and smiled to yourself.
"No...no idea" He eventually said.
You paused for a moment before flicking a couple of pages and point your finger to the same words but with $300,000 scribbled underneath.
"This?" You asked again.
He shook his head and stood up. He had no clue what that was about. Mikey was known for not being clear, but this was a joke at this stage. He made a mental note on how important bookkeeping was going to be when this place got sorted. He was not going to go through this nightmare again.
"Mornin'" Richie yawned strolling by, sporting an original beef zipped hoodie.
"Cousin" Carmy called at him, making him take a few steps back.
You glance up at him and noticed the tiredness still clinging to his eyes.
"Do you have any idea what this is about?" Carmy gestured to the desk looking over at him.
Richie readjusted the strap on his shoulder of his bag and took a step forward. He leaned in, bringing his eyes to the page.
"KBL electric" He said to himself, thinking.
"Fuck if I know" He flickered his eyes and gave a shrug before continuing his way to his locker.
Carmy brought his hand to his forehead, pushing his hair back. He let out deep exhale, continuing to look at the writing in the book.
"Look, maybe I'll come across something else that might give us a hint." You said, tucking a stray hair behind your ear.
"I'll let you know if I see anything else." You brought your eyes back down to the book.
"Sounds good." Carmy stayed there for a beat before going back into the kitchen.
Time goes by, you have no idea how long it been. You hear a light cough and look up to see Marcus.
"Shit!" You gasped to yourself, completely startled.
"Fuck Marcus, a little warning? Maybe a knock?" You said putting your hand on your chest, feeling your racing heart.
"Sorry, didn't mean to scare you." He smiled looking down at you.
You brought your eyes down to see him holding a freshly made donut covered in icing sugar. He placed the plate on the desk.
"This looks.. unreal" You grinned picking up the donut glancing up at him.
"Yeah, well... I thought if I was gonna to really start nailing this down, I needed to learn the classics first." Marcus licked his lips, waiting for me to take my first bite.
You take a bite, a big one, making sure you get some of the filling. The dough is fresh and pulls away so delicately. Once you get a couple of chews in, the filling hits your tongue. The sweetest jam awakens your tastebuds. You raise your eyebrows out of pure instinct of how unexpectedly delicious it is. You pull away the donut and look at it to see the rich red filling oozes out of the donut. You bring your finger up to it to catch it before any of it drips off.
"Mhhmm...Dahhmmn Marcus." You called out with your mouth half full with donut.
He instantly beams, shining that big bright smile at you.
"Good?" He asked, angling his head.
"Fuck yeah, way better than good!" You complimented.
You lean in for another bite and stop.
"I can have the rest of this, right?" You double-checked looking up at him.
He nodded, chuffed with himself that he could get someone to react to his baking that way. With Syd and Carmy being critical about his previous attempts, he lacked the little bit of confidence.
You take another bite and enjoy the perks of being around a training prodigy of a pastry chef.
"Mmhh you show..mhh Syd... yet?" You asked with a mouthful of donut.
"Not yet.. I don't think I'm there yet. " He shook his head, putting his hands on his beanie.
"Marcus! Nah, I'm changing that." You swallowed and put the half ate donut back on the plate.
"Syd! Sy-" You yelled out leaning out the doorway over his shoulder.
"No, no- needa still fix-" Marcus put up his hands, trying to block the doorway. It didn't take a second before the swinging door opened.
"Yea?" She popped her head out, wondering what the commotion was.
"You gotta try this!" You said excitedly, glancing up at Marcus.
The grin was gone off his face and replaced with a slightly nervous one. You gave a slight apologetic one back, not wanting him to hate you after this. You reached for the donut handing the plate to Syd at the door way.
As she took a bite, you looked over to Marcus, who had his lips pressed into a fine line.
You both watched her, waiting for her reaction. She took a bite and chewed. After a few seconds, her eyebrows shot up, and she continued to feel the donut's texture between her two fingers, as she was eating it.
"Marcus, this is the shit." She looked up finally giving a big smile before giving him a playful punch in the arm.
The tension from Marcus shoulders melted away. He brought his hands up to his head and took a deep breath, a smile appeared on his face.
Marcus was still new to all of this and wanted to learn as much as possible. He didn't want to get too carried away though. From time to time he felt overwhelmed with all the guidance he would get from Carmy and Syd. He wouldn't know how to use that knowledge to make his recipes better. They were already so established in the flavors they liked. He was only starting to understand the basics.
"I have one recommendation, though." Syd sucked her lip in, still tasting the donut on her lips.
"Yeah, of course." Marcus looked at her eagerly, waiting for her response.
"The filling might be a little too sweet." She explained, dipping her fingertip in the red ooze that had spilled onto the plate and bringing it up to her mouth.
"Okay, that's fair" He agreed.
"Do you still have some of it left?" She asked
Marcus nodded looking at her.
"Here, let me show you something." She turns around heading to the kitchen with Marcus following her.
"Marcus!" You called him making him glance back at you.
"I think it was perfect" You grinned mocking a chefs kiss
"Heard" He chuckled, heading to the kitchen.
Before you know it, it's already Wednesday. You can tell that fatigue is catching. You wake up at 10:30am, sleeping through two of your alarms. You groaned out of bed still feeling like you need another six hours before it even makes a dent in your exhaustion. You unlock your phone to a text from Carmy.
Need to talk bills, let me know when you're in.
You check the time of the message. 6:30am
You get to the restaurant at noon and to say things were hectic, was an understatement. You popped your head into the kitchen to hear Carmy yelling orders more frantically than normal. No one saying a word. You noticed the line of tickets stacked up and thought maybe you would wait a bit for it to calm down.
You head to the office to see Richie on the chair scrolling on his phone.
"Mornin' sweetheart" He glanced up.
"What happened?" You asked taking your coat off.
"Sydney fucked up. That's what happenin'. Cousin blew his fuckin' head, told Syd to get the fuck out. Keep away if I was you" He got up and stretched.
"Gotta go back out now and fuckin' deal with this train wreck, fuck me." He groaned rubbing his face.
"Good luck with that," you grinned sitting down on the warmed up chair.
"Gonna need it." He mumbled, making his way back to the front.
You heard the door open and Carmy voice bellowed with anger before the door closed again and it was muffled.
Carmy stabbed the last ticket on the stack of paper and looked up at the clock. It was the fastest four hours that went by. The relief that overcame him knowing that they got through that catastrophe.
"Housekeeping chefs" He announced wiping the sweat off his brow with the back of his hand.
"Yes Chef" They replied as the start to clean up the mess around them.
He made his way to the office to see you sitting there.
"Wha-"
"Don't ask" He stated in the doorway pushing back his hair with both hands.
"Okay" You said taken aback by the bluntness.
He watched you for a moment. You had various bills in front of you. All with the dooming "overdue" print on it.
It was moments like this that he wished he could just walk out. The feeling of drowning in anxiety was unbearable. He didn't have the energy to fight it. He thought about just shutting the place down. Just accept defeat. Try and move on, maybe walk away from cooking for a beat. He would leave Chicago and not tell anyone. Just get away from everything for a couple of months. If he was honest with himself, he didn't even know if that's what he needed. He's been neglecting his needs for so long he didn't know what he actually wanted from life anymore.
You looked up at him after minutes of silence. He wasn't present anymore. He was completely dissociated. You did say anything. You continued to look at the money flow, the account book you put together last week.
"Sorry, I was-" He rubbed his eyes, waking himself up from the negative thoughts.
"Just so fuckin' tired" He mumbled taking another couple of steps in.
You clicked your pen a couple of times thinking about how to phrase the news you had.
"So...What's up?" He asked bringing his full attention to you.
He felt your hesitation.
"That bad huh?" He breathed out.
You looked up to see his face was red and his eyes tired. His hair was wet with sweat.
"Y-Yeah, it is" you pressed your lips together.
You pointed the end of the pen to the electric bill.
"You only have enough money to cover electric bill or your produce order." You said straight out.
"Fffuck," He said quietly, looking down at the bill.
"When does the electric bill have to be paid?" He asked
"In 4 days"
Carmy head dropped, his eyes closed, and he took a deep breath. He wasn't even sure if this nightmare was real anymore. He didn't think anymore shit could get more fucked.
"Carmy"
He brought his eyes to you.
"Let me help," you started, knowing he wasn't going to like what was going to come out of your mouth.
"Let me cover this bill, just so-"
"No fuckin' way. No. " He raised his hand, stopping you in your tracks.
"Bu-"
"Stop, not happenin'." He snapped.
He glared into you, not wanting you to say another word about your ideas.
He couldn't even fathom the idea of you pumping your own money into the place. He's not even paying you. What type of owner would he be - or even a friend? It was bad enough that he had to sell his own sentimental belongings just to have meat to work with for the next day.
"I'll figure somethin' out," he stated.
He sat down at the bench between the lockers. He rested his arms on his thigh, bent over with his head in his hands. Today was.... he couldn't even think of a word. Every time he thinks this place can't go anywhere, it hits a different rock bottom. It's been in his possession for 3 weeks. It'll be closed in the next three if something doesn't change.
He felt a body sit beside him on the bench and gave a side eye. Richie sat next to him. Richie was the last person he needed to talk to right now. He couldn't deal with his bullshit.
Richie leaned over behind the locker and picked up a white envelope before sitting back on the bench. There was a beat of silence between them.
If there was ever a time where Richie felt would be the right moment to give Carmy this. It would be now. He looked over to see Carmy completely defeated and exhausted. Since arriving here, Carmy has put all his energy into this place, and it has fucked him every way possible.
Richie felt relief when Carmy arrived one morning on his doorstep. After the funeral, Richie had chaos released on him. Mikey's family asked when Carmy would come back to take over the restaurant. Sugar trying to contact both of them, to grasp any information on what was happening. Richie didn't know anything and now had to handle taking over the place with no idea what to do. To see Carmy in front of him, he had never been happier seeing him than that day.
Carmy looked over, his face change from fed up to anxious instantly, noticing what was in Richie's hand. Carmy recognized the writing and felt his heart pick up. The writing scrawled on the front with a black ink.
To Carmy,
From Mikey.
Carmy hesitantly took it off of him, not lifting his stare from it.
"What is this?" He asked concerned, looking at Richie.
Richie gestured his hands. He didn't know what to say.
"I don't know," he murmured.
Carmy eyes flickered between the envelope and Richie, not understanding what was happening.
"Richie, wh-what the fuck is this?" Carmy spoke up, grasping the envelope with a firmer grip.
"I don't know..." Richie shook his head gently.
"...And I didn't really want to give it to you 'cause.... it meant he was gone. Um, but, uh..." He broke off, feeling his stomach churn.
Carmy looked at him, feeling pain in his chest. He watched Richie, seeing the grief cascade over his face and realize he wasn't the only one going through this. Carmy placed his hand on Richie leg, Richie brought his arm to Carmy's back and for that moment, they both felt the devastation of Mikey presence finally gone. They sat there for a while before Richie got up, giving Carmy the space he needed.
It ran through Carmy's mind if he should even open the letter. Was it worth the wound that was going to be torn up with reading it. He didn't know if he was going to have the strength to continue today.
He needed to go elsewhere. No fucking way was he having the chance of anyone catching him in this sorry state. He made his way to a side alley next to the building. The cold air hitting his red hot skin making it feel like it was on fire. His heart was thumping. He got on his honkers and stared at it.
Maybe, he should wait til' he's home tonight?
Fuck it, he thought to himself.
He stared at it, in his shaky hands, before taking a deep inhale.
"Stupid" He whispered to himself not wanting to make a big deal out of this.
Even though this was going to be the last contact he was going to have with his brother. It was final. Mikey had the last say. After all the time of Carmy thinking Mikey left him nothing. Somehow, this felt worse because he knew for certain Mikey had this all planned. It made it more real than just hearing about it from people's mouths.
Carmy bit his lip, his feelings whelming up inside, finally it was hitting him.
He flipped it over and start ripping it open quickly.
There it was. Two small sentences in the center of the page.
I love you dude.
Let it rip
His eyes ran over the words again and again. Hearing Mikey voice in his head. Carmy choked back tears, bringing his hand up to his face, his eyes never leaving the words. The lump in his throat became unbearable. He felt his body start to tremble. The pain in his chest became stronger to the point that he held his breath to ease the strain.
After a moment, he took a breath in, feeling agony wash over him.
"Fuck you.. fuck you" He sniffled.
He knew it was going to hit him. It did. This scrap of paper made all the feelings he have been brewing since getting the phone call finally come up.
He took deep breaths and looked up. He focused on trying not to lose it completely. The wave of grief over swept him like he was drowning. The tightness in his chest constricting and releasing.
He flipped over the piece of paper and saw the family's spaghetti recipe wrote on the back. No instructions, just the ingredients. A small smile crept up on his face.
After a few minutes of steady breathing, he pulled himself together. He put the letter into the envelope and shoved it in his pocket.
He went back into the kitchen to see everyone prepping. He noticed Richie's eyes following him as he weaved through the station.
"You a'ight?" Richie whispered, coming up behind him.
Carmy nodded before reaching up for a 28oz can of tomato sauce.
"I'm.. gonna make spaghetti. I need to clear my head for a bit, " he mumbled, bringing it to the countertop.
"Uhh.. okay" Richie hesitated before giving a worried look to Tina.
She shrugged her shoulders making her way to the walk-in.
Carmy knew prep needed to get done but he just needed sometime to turn off his thoughts and get lost in cooking without thinking about it. He wanted his body to go into autopilot.
He added the garlic cloves to the pot and poured in an eye measurement of oil, clicking on the gas ring until a flame emitted on the surface. In another pan, he had half onions getting fried in butter. As they sizzled away, he leaned over to grab a can opener and opened one of the cans before dumping the contents with the onion.
He saw hints of green mixed with the tomatoes and shoved it around to see it was a lump of something. He grabbed it and wiped away the remaining sauce surrounding it.
"There's no fuckin' way" He said to himself tearing off the clear wrapping on the suspicious looking bundle of money. The hundred dollar number facing back at him, he couldn't believe his eyes.
"Cousin!" He urgently yelled not taking his eyes off the hundred dollar notes in his hand.
"Yo!"
"HELP" He shouted back coming to the realization of what might be happening.
You heard the racket from the office, hoping it wasn't another meltdown situation. As you entered the kitchen you saw everyone walk past your with cans and cans of tomatoes.
"Get you ass to work, Chica," Tina grinned.
"What?" You asked, completely confused about what was going on.
"Money." She beamed before continuing her way.
You went to where the cans where stored to see Richie stacking them on a metal tray.
"You're not gonna fuckin' believe this" He snickered.
That evening Carmy gave you the run down of what he thought Mikey did. He showed you the KBL on the lid of the unsuspicious can of tomato sauce. The hint that you were looking for was right into front of you the whole time. Everyone walked past those cans 50 times a day, not blinking an eye. Hidden in plain sight.
For the rest of the evening, everyone got plenty of practice on their can opening skills. Tomato sauce was everywhere. Everyone emptying the cans and pulling out bundles of money. Richie was tallying it up with his calculator. Syd came to join us, completely unaware of the jacket pot that landed on all of you during the day. Carmy spoke to her about what the money could do for them. For the restaurant, and with that, she was reeled it.
Everyone was at an all time high with the sudden change in events, Carmy decided that service wasn't happening for the rest of the day. He knew everyone needed one night of blowing off steam for, hopefully, the new chapter ahead that he had in his mind.
"How many should I get?" You asked dialing the number on the office phone.
"Uh... 10?" Carmy suggested, scratching back of his head.
You order several types of Chicago deep dish pizzas with excited muffled voices in the other room.
You hung up the phone after making the order and looked over at Carmy who was still standing there, dissociated or exhausted or maybe both.
"Well we finally got the hint" You smiled putting the phone back on the desk.
He snapped out of his trance.
"Oh yea, you could say that" He gave a little smile.
You could both hear the happy chatter over in the next room with Richie's booming voice echoing the most.
"My sister, Suga, is coming over."
"Oh that's great"
In the time you were working with Carmy, he would only really bring up Sugar. You knew Mikey existed but Sugar's name came up the most in conversation. You would also see him get phone calls from her time to time.
Richie went to collect the pizzas. You and Carmy joined everyone in the side room. Tina was chatting to Sydney, helping her lay out the long table. Marcus in the corner hooking up his phone with Richie small speaker. Everyone else was scattered around the room talking.
"Hey!" A blonde woman walked in with a big smile on her face.
Carmy instantly drew her into a hug. He leaned back glancing at me before looking back at her.
"This is Suga" He introduced me to her
She smiled over at me and opened her arms to me.
"Oh my god, it's great to finally meet you. Carmy has told me a lot about you over the years" Suga gave me a squeeze before pulling away.
"Really?" You said surprised, not even thinking he would bring you up to other people.
"Same here!" You grinned back.
"We gotta talk later about what the hell is going on" She side mouthed to Carmy before making her way to Tina who was already greeting her.
Richie finally came back with the pizzas and everyone started digging in. You found yourself stuck in a conversation with Richie and Fak
"I swear to fuckin' God it happened" Richie exclaimed telling the story on how Bill Murray is his voicemail.
"I've heard it and it's true" Fak reassuringly nodded at you.
You shook your head in disbelief, knowing it was going to rile up Richie.
"C'mon, you fuckin' believe me, ight?" Richie turned his head to you.
"Well, to be honest, I would have to hear it." You shrugged your shoulders, giving a quick cheeky smile to Fak.
"Fuck it, do you have your phone?"
Fak and I both shook our heads.
"Let me get my phone" Richie felt his pockets trying to place his.
"Hold up" He raised his hand before he walks off towards the kitchen on the mission to find his phone.
As your eyes followed Richie walk out, your sight landed on Carmy sitting at the table talking to Sugar about this evening. You notice his hand was in his hair as he listened to her.
You tell Fak that you're going to get something to drink, asking him if he wanted anything. He said he was good before getting distracted with a song that Marcus had just put on. He boogied his way to Marcus, reeling him in on a fake fishing line.
You made your way to grab a beer out of one of the ice buckets on the table.
"I see you." You hear a voice, and you look down to see Tina sitting at the table picking at her leftover crust.
"Huh?"
She smiled suspiciously before gesturing you to sit down across from her.
"So, how long have you've been..." She rolls her eye towards Carmy at the end of the table.
You glanced over to see him still occupied with Sugar.
"I have no i-"
"Naw, don't play dumb with me. I see the looks you give each other" She narrowed her eyes stilling grinning.
You finally caught on to what she was on about and immediately chuckled.
"Oh no, noth- we're just friends." You smiled, feeling caught off guard on what to say.
"Not in my eyes," she quipped back, taking a drink from her beer.
You looked over to Carmy, and caught him looking at you and immediately took his eyes away. You felt shy all of a sudden. You tried to think back to see if there were any times you and Carmy seemed to be closer to than friends, especially from people looking from the outside in. Nothing came to mind.
"I'm telling you Chica, I'm not judging. Just wonderin' how long has it been going on"
"Well we've never been... together that way" You felt embarrassed explaining to Tina.
She pulled back with her eyebrows raised
"You coulda fooled me" She remarked.
"Here! Here listen" Richie came over shoving his phone in your hand.
You brought the phone up to your ear and on the other end was the voice of Bill Murray.
"Damn," you said to yourself, seeing Richie grin become bigger.
"Fuckin' told you"
You were impressed that you could actually hear Bill Murray and realized that Richie wasn't lying. It's not that you didn't believe him, but maybe didn't take everything he said to heart.
You felt a tap on your shoulder and looked over to see Carmy behind you.
"Wanna talk to you in the office, for a min" He said with a serious tone.
You nodded handing the phone back to Richie. You got up and felt Tina eyes not leaving you until you walked out of the room.
For some reason, your stomach did a flip. What was this about. This is the most relaxed the place has been since you've arrived here. But you could tell Carmy was far from relaxed.
He sat in the chair in the office before leaning over to pull out a foldable chair for you to sit on. As you sat down, you noticed his leg jittering. His inked fingers were tapping on the desk like he was thinking about something.
"Uh.. So I was talkin' to Suga and explainin' everything that happened with the tomato cans and money." He started looking at you.
"She saw all the paper you helped filed and I told her about all the late nights you've been here. Non stop..." He further explained.
As he went on, tension was in the air. You had no idea what he was going on about but him talking more and more made you nervous.
"Carmy" You stated trying to get him to the point.
"Uh.. sorry- fuck" He pushed his hair back and looked down.
"You've been a massive fuckin' help to us. This is crazy to even bring up, so don't worry if you don't wanna..." He continued to ramble.
"I wanna offer you a position here," He finally said.
"What?" You stunned by what just came out of his mouth.
"I wanna offer you a job. I've talked to everyone, and they would love to have you here. It makes sense. You're already caught up on the financial situation, and I trust you."
"Move to Chicago?" You looked down, picking your fingers nervously.
"Uh, y-yeah. I know it's a big ask. I know I still have to pay you for the two weeks, too. But everyone would hate to see you go and-"
"Everyone?" You sputtered out, only realizing after, you said it out loud.
You looked up into his eyes. His blue stare gazing back to you.
"... I w-would, " He stuttered, breaking a small smile.
You felt your heart skip. The thought of moving to Chicago made your stomach flutter. The idea of coming to this place every week made you smile. But most importantly, seeing Carmy daily gave you a weird comfort.
"I have big plans for this place. I would only want people by my side that I know I can count on. One of them is you." He tapped his fingers on the desk lightly.
Your mind went to all the things you would have to start organizing. Your old apartment, moving furniture, driving back to Chicago. It was a lot, especially by yourself.
"I don't know how long-"
"Don't worry, there's no rush. Take the time you need to move here." He scrambled, feeling he was asking a lot from you.
There was a moment of silence between you both. He could tell you were overwhelmed.
"I wanna help you move..." He spoke up, seeing the unexpected look on your face.
".. if only you want," he added not wanting to be too forward.
"Are you sure?" You pressed your lips into fine line.
"Yea, yeah, with both of us, it would be faster. Plus, everyone here could start breaking this place down. " He motioned to his surroundings.
"Look, I'm not asking for an answer now. But, think about it ?" He leaned closer.
You nodded, looking back at him.
Carmy wanted you to say yes. He didn't want to say goodbye. Over the last few weeks, he's gotten used to seeing you. Him going to you moments when he felt everything was falling apart. The rising anxiety he felt imagining you flying off at the end of the week. Him not seeing you come in with coffee for him in the morning. Him making you a quick bite, knowing you would have forgotten to eat all day. In this short period of time, he fell into a routine with you.
The only thing giving him peace was that this place was going to be hectic when it came to renovation that he'll hopefully be too busy to notice you were gone.
"Marcus made us cake! Get some before it's all gone with Richie fat ass. " Tina smirked, leaning into the doorway.
"Go ahead, ill be out in a min" Carmy ushered you away with him staying behind.
"Lovebirds," She muttered, wagging her eyebrows mockingly.
You rolled your eyes, giving her light shove.
Everyone dug into the moist, delicious, double layered chocolate cake. They uttered compliments to Marcus as they took their first bites. It was the perfect thing to end the crazy day. Carmy finally joined you all and picked up a piece of cake that Sydney was guarding against Fak, who wanted seconds.
You both kept separate sides of the room but felt each other's stares. Whatever was growing between each other, you're both hoping it was a wave that would fade away. Just the novelty after not seeing each other for so long. Or maybe the fact that you might not see each other again.
You wanted to think about this straight. It would be easy to get caught up in the fantasy of starting a new life here. You had to think things through, talk to your parents. You knew they were going to question you when it came to your incentives to moving to Chicago. You were apprehensive bringing up Carmy, knowing them hearing a boy's name will ring alarm bells. Did you really want to move to Chicago? Do you really want to commit to a restaurant that doesn't even exist yet? Were you putting yourself through all this trouble just to please a close friend of yours?
These were all questions that were causing you anxiety. You pushed those thoughts out of your head wanting to enjoy one fun night with these group of people that you've become so close with.
"Shots! Shots! Shots!" Richie shouted raising the bottle of Tequila entering the room.
"Here's to a new fuckin' start Cousin!" Richie yelled wrapping his arm around Carmy shoulder pulling him in closer to him.
Carmy grinned, for once giving in to Richie hyper emotions and wrapped his arm around him. His eyes travelled across the room and landed on you. He gestured for you to come over. Richie was pouring shots for everyone. Even if you didn't want one, it didn't seem to be an option.
"I just wanna say.. that I know the last month has been hell" Carmy spoke up bringing the attention to him.
"But, this is the beginning of something bigger than all of us and I know we'll be able to pull it off..." He glanced to everyone holding his cup of tequila.
"So let's make this place something we're proud of...." He paused bringing his cup up.
"and let it rip" He announced
Everyone brought their cups together before downing the tequila.
Chapter 4
Masterlist to other fics
144 notes · View notes
valentine-writes · 8 months
Note
Spot nation is here humbly requesting again u-u One of your recent works breifly touched on The Spot getting protective over an upset reader. Would love to read your take on expanding that concept. :^] Make it as lighthearted or serious as you like! Maybe the reader has to tell him to chill out instead. Like, we love you queen but take it easy. No worries if this isn't smthn you want to do! Loving your writing in general! Take care :>
:(
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「 tws + notes: POSSIBLE FLASH WARNING FOR THE GIF BELOW THE CUT?? (jus to be safe!! idk if this is needed or not-), no tws, unedited, super silly moment from me im not in a slash srs mood 」
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「 gn!reader, can be platonic or romantic <3 」
↳ ft. johnathan ohnn/the spot
author's note: AUWWHJWAB HELLO!!! u are so so polite omg thank u so much ! ^_^ i luv tha enthusiasm i've been seein from spot nation tbh!!! o((>ω< ))o i'd be happy to expand on that hc! im gon make it a little teeny tiny bit more lighthearted becuz i luv myself some silly hcs but here we go!! super duper soz if itz a bit short anon </3
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▸ i think i like writing the spot as a silly lil dude who is jus tryin so so hard. but also he did work for Fucked Up Evil and Co. (alchemax is just brimming w/ all sorts of brilliant minds with horrifying ideas in the name of science. kingpin ran this shit and would not have it any other way) like he's not beyond being an absolute menace he just didn't have the means for it at the beginning of the movie. so we're gonna keep it lighthearted and silly but,,,
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we're gonna keep this in mind too, yeah?
▸ you're incredibly dear to him. he's become a little more protective than he usually would be (can't have you being taken away from him! not after literally everyone else in life life ditched–) and it's just the littlest bit unhealthy.
he really does mean well! you just find yourself reminding him to dial it down a bit.
▸ especially after he's gotten a hang of using his powers?... he's got the means to keep you from harm. he may still be insecure about his appearance, but those thoughts can be (temporarily) satiated when he knows what he can do.
the power at the multiverse, in the palm of his hand
i mean. you can't expect him to not want to defend you with it.
▸ you remind him, time and time again that he really doesn't need to check up on you that frequently. in spite of this, he can't help peeking into a portal, just to check on you here and there.
"i swear to you, i'll be fine." you tell him, time and time again- and he trusts you, he really does. but it doesn't hurt to be absolutely, positively, 100% certain, right?
▸ on the days you're upset because of a particularly bad day (not specifically conflict with people, just little things or internal issues, etc, etc... the Horrors,,,,) he offers the support he knows that he'd want.
if you're a person who's obvious with their emotions, he's pretty okay with picking up the cues you're not doing fine. will start up a conversation and then awkwardly ask if you're doing okay.
it's a little more tricky if you're subtle. overtime, he learns what to look for- little signs that indicate you're not doing well- and ensures that he's straightforward in asking about how you're feeling.
and sometimes, he able to sense that something is off. there's a tension in the air neither of you want to talk about, a feeling in his bones that he can't quite shake. he dislikes this the most. mainly because it's easy to attribute this feeling to overthinking. he'll check up on how you're feeling anyways. even if it takes a while to muster the courage.
without fail, he feels his heart break a bit when you look up at him with the saddest expression he's seen on your face. your frown is almost painful to see :(
he's got a very formulaic strategy in his mind that he uses to help you deal with bad days
something like this mefinks,,,
[ step a: he starts by asking what's going on with you... ask how you're feeling and all that. if your mood is negative, he'll try to ask why and if you wanna talk about it ]
if you choose to take up the offer, go to step b. if you refuse, go to step c.
[ step b: listen! provide support, be attentive. he'll let you rant, scream about it (ok maybe not too loud though, but,, y'know. if it helps, it helps), cry- anything. if you do cry, go to step d ]
[ step c: distract!! distract, distract, distract. you got a favourite comfort show or movie? he tells you: hey, you haven't watched it in a while (even if you have), why don't we put it on? your favorite video game? he'll play with you! talk about your favorite things or talk about nothing while you grab a snack or drink. he knows avoiding stuff isn't gonna work for long term problems, but he's more than willing to cheer you up ]
[ step d: SILENTPANICSILENTPANIC... internally he's just kinda freaking out because it's hard to see you cry. he's not awful with comfort- just a little stiff, y'know? much better with distractions. but in the event of you crying: he'll rub your back, wrap his arms around you. or give you space (depending on what you need) probably goes "hey, no, no no- it's okay, it's okay-" while attempting to soothe you. gives you time to cry it out while he babbles reassurances under his breath. ]
he really does try his best (´꒳`。)
▸ if you're beefing with someone and it's making you upset, he'll listen to you complain about them. out here nodding and agreeing with you like he was there to witness. again, he's got your back!!
(this part partially inspired by @//spdrslayr 's posts!!) in interest of cheering you up,,, you two make fun of the person.
if you're someone to openly bitch about someone and aren't afraid of getting a little mean behind someone's back,, he's making fun of them too.
of course, if you're like "noo,, but like,,, that's mean-" he's quick to remind you what they did. like they had the audacity, there's no need to be sorry.
if you're consumed by harrowing guilt anytime you're remotely rude (even behind someone's back) he'll tone the jokes down. just a little. he can be VERY a little out of pocket.
likes watching you try not to lose it, stifling laughter, as you share a moment over mutual hatred for said person
"hey– that wasn't.. that wasn't funny–" you're snicker, doing very little to hide the obvious smile on your face. he loves seeing your face brighten, the frown on it now replaced with a grin you just can't hold back
he's gonna crack jokes about them randomly too in your conversations. he's good at holding a grudge yeah,,, but at least in this case he's funny abt it. it's lowkey starting to sound like he was wronged instead of you.
▸ if someone hurts you? that's a whole other story. (hehe. whole- my bad.)
being inconsiderate, rude, and mean to you is one thing, but bringing physical harm to you?
he can't stand the idea that someone would want to harm you. it doesn't matter what happened in the events leading to it. he knows you didn't deserve it. he knows it. the minute he sees the tears stinging in your eyes,, the bruising on your body– the blood–
someone's going to have to answer for it.
(but im not talking abt him tryin to rock someone's shit becuz that would be 10x longer blehhhh :p)
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willalove75 · 4 months
Note
Hello, lovely
This is a little different. I was just wondering what you're headcanons are on Lady D?
I love this!! I've been super slacking with my writing so I'm hoping this helps me refocus and get back into it!! I have to say I definitely write her a little differently than some of my headcanons because it's more fun to write her the way I do and because I can but this is what I got!
Lady Dimitrescu is VERY meticulous - about everything. From the way she files the papers for the vineyard, to her record keeping, her staff, she has a system for every little thing and cannot stand when something is out of place.
This is also why she trusts Bela with her business instead of Cassandra or Daniela, especially Daniela😂
She is also very particular about her appearance. Her hair and makeup are always pristine and it's rare for anyone to ever see her with a hair out of place or smudged makeup.
She's definitely vain, maybe a little bit narcissistic.
Because she grew up in nobility she was never able to properly express her feelings since it was always frowned upon. That combined with being absolutely spoiled as a kid she has a very difficult time with being vulnerable and most of her emotions come out as a display of anger.
I don't think she ever wanted children before the cadou (for many reasons but also because it was never possible because she was so sick, carrying children would have certainly been a death sentence for her so it was never really an option) but after the girls came they filled a space in her heart she didn't know existed.
She was WAY more of a tyrant before the girls showed up.
I think part of her resented the way she grew up. I don't think she was ever able to have much of a childhood between being sick all the time and because she was nobility, so when she was raising the girls she showered them with the love and affection she never got and wanted them to be able to play and have fun.
Which is why it makes her sad when she has to lock them up in the castle in the winter because she felt like she was always locked away and hates having to do the same thing to her girls, even if it is for their own protection.
That didn't stop her from trying to instill proper manners and etiquette in them - she did try her best, but Cassandra and Daniela are unruly as hell.
I think she's proud of the dragon inside of her, even though she doesn't let it out. (I usually write her as someone who isn't but I truly think she enjoys the fear she can instill with it).
I also think that transforming is extremely taxing and painful for her which is why Mother Miranda was the only one who ever saw her in that state before Ethan.
Every time a new set of maids comes in she introduces herself and hand-picks which ones will get sent to the dungeon and which ones that will serve in her castle. She's too particular to let just anyone in her domain and around her girls.
She does let Bela shadow her and allows the girls to pick one of the maidens going to the dungeon to play with.
Aside from a personal maid or two, she sends all other maids out of the dining room during meals so she can enjoy spending time with her daughters.
Around the maids and staff she is strict and tough, but fair. But she does her best to not let them see her softer side that she reserves for her daughters. She doesn't want any maid to think for a second she isn't the hardened, stoic woman she wants to be seen as. It's taken decades to build her reputation, she'll be damned to see it dissolve because a maid saw her comfort one of her girls.
I don't write her like this but I do think she takes maidens as pets but they don't last longer than a night or two in her chambers.
Especially if she lets them pleasure her. That's as vulnerable as she will ever let herself be around someone else and being able to see her in that state is such an honor, they pay for it with their lives.
She spends a LOT of time in the opera hall, atelier and library. If she isn't in her study, her chambers or with the girls, she'll be in one of those places.
The girls are NOT allowed in her atelier and she doesn't let maids in there either. It's a sacred room to her and is off-limits to everyone.
At night after a bath and a glass of her Sanguinis Virginis, she's either reading or writing in her diary.
She smokes and drinks more when she's stressed. She may be immortal but the woman still has her vices.
She is FIERCELY protective of those she cares about. Especially her daughters. Although she has gone out of her way to protect her favorite maids in the past - without their knowledge of course.
That's all I got for now!! Hope you all enjoyed!!
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Note
Hi! I’m back :] im here to request a platonic!crows x reader kind just want some hurt/comfort I’m feeling pretty bad atm and just don’t do well w asking for comfort?? So could I request a reader who’s just having a bad time,nothing super specific just like feeling Sad more than usual and like being a bit more distant/distracted? If your not up for writing this that’s perfectly fine too :] Have a nice day! -🍒Anon
Come Home- Platonic! crows x reader
Hi! This one is hitting really fuckin close to home right now but selfishly, I could use a good cry and I'm in the same boat as you, so we're all good!
I'm sorry you've not been feeling too great lately and I am sending you hugs and a mug of your preferred hot drink of choice! I also hope you feel better and am sending good vibes your way :)
Fic type- this is hurt/comfort but pretty heavy on the comforting!
Warnings- mentions and depictions of general sadness, mention of lack of sleep/trouble sleeping both generally and due to sadness, mentions of being unable to reach out to people in search of comfort or a place to vent, mentions of being distant (emotionally) and also isolating oneself, a 'there but not there' kind of sadness, mentions of retreating into your own thoughts/mind
The crows couldn't quite say who'd noticed it first amongst them. Nina was pretty sure they'd all noticed it around the same time, could remember the fact that it was a date in the middle of the Spring.
You'd spent a lot of time in your room in the Slat, not really talking to anyone, seemingly both content and somehow discontent in the idea of burrowing into your own thoughts, retreating into your own mind.
When you were with the others, you were distant. It was like you were there but not there all the same, responding to conversations and laughing occasionally, but Nina could see it.
She knew what it looked like to be wrapped up in ones own thoughts, and recognizing it within you was like seeing water in the middle of the ocean; it was about as obvious as the day was long.
Wylan and Jesper and Matthias picked up on that, too, then Inej and Kaz. They'd all picked up on it the same day, and were sitting at a U-shaped booth in the Crow Club to discuss it in the days after they'd noticed.
"They're not the type to ask for help," Matthias noted. "I think they'd rather struggle in silence most days then reach out and vent to someone."
"They don't directly ask to be comforted or seek out things that people would typically find comforting," Inej noted. "I don't think I've ever seen them hug someone or be hugged themselves. They handle their emotions internally, it seems."
"How do we comfort someone who does not want to be comforted?" Matthias asked. "How on earth are we meant to be subtle about it?"
"The rest of us can worry about that," Jesper said. "Matthias, Kaz, don't you worry a hair on your pretty little heads."
"Hugs and arms around shoulders aren't always how it's done," Kaz said. "There are a thousand other ways, Jesper. Comfort doesn't just have to be about physically touching someone."
"Nice gestures," Nina suggested. "I didn't think you had a nice bone in your body. I'm pleased to be wrong in that."
"Pleased to have been underestimated," Kaz said. "Matthias, you're not touch averse. We are not one and the same, so you'll just have to figure it out on your own."
Matthias scoffed, and Kaz spoke the word before he got the chance to whisper it.
"Demjin," Kaz said, taking delight in Matthias' scowl.
"All right," Wylan said. "Our plan is figured out. Find ways to subtly comfort the one of us who needs comforting and just hope they don't notice? How long do we keep that up?"
"Until they notice or they feel better," Nina said. "It's--it's whichever comes first. Stop asking questions. We'll work out the rest of the details as we go along."
Everyone nodded. Whatever qualms anyone else had about the plan went unsaid, and the world around the six of them settled with the knowledge that they were going to help you feel better, even if you never caught on.
If you never noticed, if you thought your mood was brightening naturally, if you never figured it out and never said the profuse thanks that Nina knew you would've, that would've been fine. It would've been great because you were fine again, and in the end, that was all any of them wanted.
-
"Brought you a coffee," Jesper said, passing you the to-go mug as he found you in the Slat. "Kaz and I were in the Harbor. Kaz needed a dose of caffeine and I figured you'd probably done without."
"It's seven and a half bells in the morning. You were on the Harbor to scout before we left, and Kaz found the time for a pit stop?"
"I did things more efficiently then he'd expected," Jesper said with a charming grin. "Had twenty kruge. Grabbed Wylan a tea, gave it to him by the Crow Club. We leave for Ravka in a quarter of an hour, and it'll take us that time to get from here to Inejs berth. Your things are on her boat?"
"Matthias helped me take my things to the boat after Nina had the gall to wake me at five bells and then bribe me with waffles. I felt like a bunny with a carrot being dangled over its head."
Jesper noticed, though, that you were smiling.
"Thank you for the coffee," you said. "Saints, was the sleepy time tea a mistake. Do you know if Kaz has any jurda on him?"
"You've been having trouble sleeping?" Jesper asked. "I mean--he's finnicky with his coffee and the grounds he imports are delayed by two weeks, so he does. He's been keeping an eye on the shipments because the idiot would rather chew his way through a mile and a half of jurda before he listened to his bodys calling for sleep."
"As for the trouble sleeping--yes. It's been a rough few weeks and my sleeping has been impacted a bit. Didn't get much before, but now it's worse. Sleepy time tea has made me sluggish even though I've been awake for two and a half hours now. The box did say that was a risk, though," you said. "As for the jurda, I'm in desperate need."
"Lucky for you, I miscalculated the amount coming in our last shipment. I've been selling it at the Crow Club to keep the pigeons at the tables longer but we've still got a surplus," Kaz said, passing you a small black velvet pouch with jurda inside.
"How long on the boat?" Jesper asked.
"A week and a half, but the boat we've got is slower then the Ferolind, so it might take as long as it took to get to Fjerda."
"Good thing I thought to get books for the trip then," you said, smile prickling the edges of your lips when you noticed Jespers expression of terror. "Wylans bringing his flute, Jes. You'll be fine."
You took a sip of your coffee as Jesper gave a shake of his head.
"You say that I'll be fine, but you'll see. At the end of our first week, I'll be begging Wylan to play something slow so that I'll fall asleep and you can toss me overboard and have me drown in peace."
"You'll manage," Kaz cut in. "You managed the first time around, didn't you?"
"Just barely," Jesper said exasperatedly. The three of you left the Slat, Wylan joining you as he walked out of the Crow Club.
You took another sip of your coffee, sighed as the contentment you'd missed creeped back in just a bit. Things had been terrible for weeks, a general feeling of sadness having wormed its way into your heart and left you feeling like a shell of the person you were. That was the first decent--albeit early--morning you'd had in what felt like forever.
-
Nina and Matthias were sitting on one end of the ship, you and Inej sat together on the other, in the elevated area that was reserved for the captain to keep watch of the boat and manage the wheel.
The only sound to disturb you was the waves, and it didn't disturb you at all as you leaned back in your chair and continued on with your fifth book in a week. It was a book you'd not particularly enjoyed, and a last minute grab. It was a book of sonnets that you'd grabbed on the off chance you'd be in a sonnet-y mood, and thus far, it seemed you were not.
Wylan had begun to play the flute from somewhere near the center of the ship, and as you heard it, you smiled. You looked away from your book for a moment, glancing at Wylan as you closed it, having given up.
Nina couldn't blame you for that as she noticed it, though. It grew boring to read sonnets about the love someone felt for one singular person after you'd read two of them. She had not a single clue as to how you'd managed to read fifty.
You settled simply to observe the world around you instead of reading, thumb idly tapping along to the beat of Wylans tune against the surface of the hardcover book you had in your lap.
She looked at your eyes. She knew what it looked like when a person was distant and she knew what it looked like when, albeit slowly, that person was coming back to the rest of the world.
Come on back, Y/N, she thought. We've missed you. Come back to us.
She caught your grin, caught Jesper rushing up the steps to the captains watching port. She saw him reach for your hand and grab Inejs as well. Wylan started playing a dancing song and everyone on the ship was all smiles.
Even the crew was looking giddy, though their expressions only brightened when Inej signaled for them to take a break for a dance or two.
Hell, even Nina was smiling, having only realized it when she looked at Matthias and saw he was grinning as he squeezed her hand and pulled her up, their laughter coming up naturally as they rushed toward you and Inej and Jesper.
Someone--probably Specht, as he'd unearthed a talent for it in the weeks before--was playing a violin to go along with Wylans flute. You were beaming, and Nina was beaming, and Inej and Matthias and Jesper were all smiles.
Nina caught your gaze. Just a bit more, Y/N, she thought. Come home.
You were laughing as you turned and caught sight of it, Kaz standing to Wylans left, face only slightly turned to the waves so that nobody would see his grin.
You met Ninas gaze, wiped away a tear as she gave a joyous holler.
"Yes!" she shouted. "Yes!"
"Why are you acting like someone has thrown millions of kruge on the deck?" Jesper asked.
They're home, Nina thought. The distant look in their eyes is gone. Maybe not forever, maybe just for now, but it's good enough for me.
"I'm just so happy," she said. "Oh, I love moments like these. I love them with my whole heart. They remind me of home, of dancing with classmates by the tea samovars the minute we heard music."
Inej was hugging you as tightly as she could. "Better?" she asked. "Jesper mentioned it's been a rough time."
"Better than I was, yeah," you said. Inej pulled away and the music dulled, the moment becoming somber.
Wylan joined up, as did Kaz, and you were faced by the six people you loved the most in the entirety of the world. All of them had been trying to comfort you in the two weeks before you'd boarded the boat and in the week since you had. They'd been trying to go for subtility, but you'd noticed, and you appreciated it relentlessly.
"Thank you guys," you said. "For all of it."
"You noticed?" Matthias asked.
"You laughed at my jokes, Matthias. Nina, you offered me your toffees several times. You've never done that before. Kaz has brought me books and given me jurda and let me refuse on jobs wherein I was necessary. He's said that he would find someone else if I couldn't do it and he's said it in a way that wasn't malicious. He's told me a number of times that he understands what it is to be in pain, though he admits his is a different kind. He's given me several passes when the pain was most unbearable," you said.
"Inej has let me exist in the silence and not say a damn thing, she's swayed with me to the music we hear while wandering about in the mostly empty bodegas and boutiques. Wylan has willingly played the flute and the pianoforte around even people he does not feel secure because it might just have made me smile, he's tried to get me laugh so many times in the past month that I have entirely lost count."
"Jesper, you brought me coffee and leant me your Ketterdam uni jumper. You joke more than Wylan does, and your reassurances were near constant. I know you probably didn't want me to notice, but I did. Thank you."
Everyone--excluding Kaz, of course--pulled you into a hug. Nina was more relieved then not that you'd noticed, relieved that you were feeling better than you had three weeks before. She was happy you were okay, happy that you were smiling and that you were going to be okay eventually, even if it took time to get there.
Everyone pulled away eventually, and you gave Kaz a nod. You received a nod in return and knew that it was enough.
Being with your friends on a boat on the way to a job was enough, certainly.
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rebornologist · 3 months
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Hi! V,S and a letter that you want (if you want of course) about dino plis
Hello darling! Here are some thots I've cooked up for ya! Thank you for dropping these letters into my inbox xx
NSF/W Headcanons ♡ Dino Cavallone ✧
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✧ Cum
I’m not quite sure what else I could say about Dino’s cum because I have mentioned that he… cums quite a lot. He’s got a bit ( that’s an understatement) of a breeding kink and loves the visual of his seed dripping out any of his partner’s holes or when his lover obediently sticks their tongue out to show him the viscous fluid. It makes him feel so incredibly hot and ready to go again soon after.
He’s been clumsy about where his cum ends up, and in a panic, he’s scooped it up and licked it off of his own fingers. He doesn’t mind the taste, at all. It’s not like he regularly.. Tastes himself, but when he gets comfortable, he’d be so into tasting the mix of his and his lover’s cum together.
✧ Volume
Dino has the prettiest moans, but he doesn’t often let them out unless he’s feeling a little more submissive. It’s almost too easy to get him to squeal and squirm beneath your touch, though. He tries to stick to lower groans and focuses on his breathing so he can talk his partner through the action, but if you tug on his hair a little, ride his face a bit, etc., the whines and whimpers are about twice as loud and it’s sooo cute.
✧ Stamina
I think that with Dino, the more comfortable he gets with a partner, the shorter he lasts. When he’s feeling more emotional than usual, say, after a super romantic date where he really got to reconnect with them, or if he’s back after a long trip and missing them to death, he gets caught up in how much he loves them and the sex feels way too good, so he’ll cum quicker. He can go a few rounds, though, and the refractory period gets increasingly longer, in addition to time between orgasms.
The reverse is true, when he’s less familiar with a partner, he’s more likely to be a little nervous and will take longer to get there because his mind will wander.
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thatfilthyanimal · 3 months
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tw: stalking, grooming, pedophilia, sexual abuse, past suicidal thoughts
I've recently been made aware that Dupsy is still talking about me and is now going to random Megamind fans that don't know me and telling them to avoid me. I'm also aware that they're doing this in the Ruby Gillman fandom. I have no words to really describe the level of discomfort this brings me, but I will attempt.
First of all, all the "grooming" allegations were thoroughly debunked and proven to be bullshit. I can't believe I have to even say this. I'm a victim of grooming and sexual abuse myself. It's extremely traumatic and life-altering shit, and never something I would want to inflict on someone else. I feel like it should be obvious, with the measures I took in the server to ensure no child is exposed to such things. I was recently diagnosed with PTSD due to the shit that happened to me when I was growing up, and between processing that in therapy sessions and stomaching transitioning in a near-constant hostile-to-trans-people online social media hellscape, I am tired.
I love Megamind, more than anything, and this is known and obvious to anyone who's met me. This movie saved my life when I was extremely suicidal and planning to end my life back in 2010. Watching the movie when I did gave me something to focus on, a distraction, and a responsibility as a fandom member that helped distract me long enough to get out of the planning mindset I was in. Had I not seen the movie, I do not think I would have stuck around. I will leave it at that.
And moderating fandom spaces for Megamind has been lovely! I adore this fandom. The people in it are extremely talented and sweet, and just so damn nice, like by default. I say this all the time but I've never experienced another fandom space quite like it. There are usually bad eggs in fandoms, and perhaps -I- am said "bad egg" to some, but genuinely this one is special. I have always felt that way, even when the bad eggs show up and make a stink. It has always felt worth being here for, to me.
And while I hate to give Dupsy the satisfaction of knowing they hurt me, I need to be honest-- it's been rough. I stopped talking in my server, I locked up on most of my friends and stopped talking even in DMs. I still struggle with severe anxiety in the server and have talked to Dal on various occasions about transferring the server ownership to him. He's been very patient with my freakouts and super understanding, but it's still hard. This WAS a place I felt safe, for over ten years! And now it feels like any minor can just say I'm a groomer or a pedo or whatever with ZERO consequences, just because they're mad, just because these are words that make people go "oh shit" and listen, and man! It's not ok! And this coupled with the fact that trans people are often called groomers just for existing, just… man! I'm tired. I'm so tired.
There are real, severe, damaging effects to these claims being thrown around so casually. It's hurtful to me, as a victim of sexual abuse, because when I came forward to people about what happened when -I- was a minor, I was told I "wanted it" and "asked for it". It was made to be my fault that I was abused, and I internalized it for years. It nearly killed me. I cannot stress enough how important it is to not use claims like pedophilia and grooming so lightly-- these are VERY damning terms to use on people and should be reserved for people ACTUALLY HARMING OTHERS. Being mad I banned you from the server is not "abuse" and using my Customer Service Voice to be nice to you and then being obviously tired of you when you were banned is not "emotional grooming". What the actual fuck. ALSO. This was well over a year ago! Why am I still having to post about this? Why are you still TALKING about me? And yet again I ask, where the HELL are your parents?
Anyway, if you've been wondering why I've been so quiet these days and struggling to socialize… honestly? It's this. I hate that this is what did it. I know people trust and believe me, I know the fandom backs me up regularly and I appreciate them all so much for it. I see it, but I never know how to respond. You guys continue to make this fandom feel safe for me even when my entire brain is screaming to run, and I appreciate you so much for it.
Kids deserve to be trusted when they tell people they've been hurt and I hate that the recent proshipping discourse or whatever you want to call it, this culty all-or-nothing shit, has a bunch of minors growing up feeling like EVERYTHING is something to call rapey or predatory, with apparently little room to distinguish when REAL abuse is happening to them. I don't blame anyone for believing Dupsy, and it's honestly better they DO believe all unproven claims of abuse by default, just to stay safe-- but man, it has consequences that follow people, and really should not be a thing to just throw around because you're mad at someone. I just can't believe they're STILL going around and reaching out to strangers telling them to avoid me… like, what the fuck.
I will be ok, I always am eventually, but I needed to say something, because it's honestly been a while since I've said much of anything.
Keep being kind. <3
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AITA for telling my friend I thought he was autistic and making him cry?
I (25F) have been casual friends with "M" (25M) for several years. We're not super close friends (or at least, I'm not super close to him, I suspect he is more emotionally invested in our friendship than me. Also, according to several classmates back in college, he had a crush on me. Idk, but seems possible based on his actions. I'm gay and now have a gf, he's always been very chill and respectful about any feelings he may or may not have). Honestly, our interests, energy levels, and socializing preferences are not super compatible, but he's a good person, and we've stayed in touch after college, occasionally meeting up every few months for a hike.
For the last 5 years, I assumed he was autistic. I am also autistic (got diagnosed in my teens) and noticed a ton of autistic/neurodivergent traits as soon as I met M. TBH that's one of the big reasons we became and stayed friends, we may not be 100% compatible as friends/people but neither of us have to climb over all the neurotypical social rules and stigmas just to hang out. I've talked about my experiences with autism with him, in a commiserating/companion-type way, and we both talked about our very different childhood experiences with speech therapy and special ed.
Anyways, I had casually told my gf and mom that M's autistic (my mom got diagnosed with autism a few years ago, after I did, and my gf recently got diagnosed after both of us recognized she had similar autistic traits as me). M visited me 2 or 3 months ago and we went hiking, like usual. Afterwards, we were hanging out at my house (I live with my parents, my job's close and there's few apartments here) and M was talking about how he got fired from his job a few months ago, and was having trouble finding a new job. He was about to leave, and I left for a few min. When I came back my mom was telling M about how he should talk with HR at any future job about his autism because he was probably fired in large part due to ableism (I agree ableism played a role in his firing, probably because his bosses were shit at actually communicating and assumed everyone were mind readers). M was pretty obviously uncomfortable, and my mom is not tactful or very sensitive, so I intervened and we left.
The two of us talked for a few min. It turned out that he is Not Autistic (or at least, not diagnosed). I told him the reason my mom thought he was autistic is because I assumed he was and told her. It turns out that he has a lot of shame and negative emotions about his time in speech therapy and special ed as a kid (he had always talked about it as though they were annoying, sometime unnecessary, sometimes helpful, so I didn't know this) and some internalized ableism directed at himself. I mostly talked about my experiences with autism and getting diagnosed, and emphasized that, although I thought he had autism/neurodivergence, I'm not an expert and not trying to tell him what he is, and also that autism (especially for me) is not a bad thing. It was awkward and uncomfy for both of us, and by the end M was visibly very upset. I apologized and let him go. Before he shut the garage door I heard him start to sob. A few hours later (he lives about 2 hrs away) I texted him to apologize and reiterate what I had said earlier. He said it was ok, but idk. We've texted some, and called once since this, but haven't seen each other yet.
You may judge me on any or all of the following (potential) dick moves:
assuming M was autistic without him actually telling me
telling 2 other people he was autistic without his permission or telling him
allowing mom to bring up a sensitive subject like this
how I handled the situation afterwards, including telling M I think he's autistic and talking about myself
any other asshole thing you may ID from this story
What are these acronyms?
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opal-owl-flight · 10 days
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I'm going to pretend that your 3 and 4 were too busy/not mature enough at the time to be in love/develop those feelings back before 4 left.
They were just coworkers having fun, being more than coworkers (friends!), and making memories.
But when 4 came back, those feelings became so much more complex. And things only got worse and harder to understand as 4 and 3's relationship as coworkers and friends became strained, between 3's desire for 4 to surpass them and 4's self-loathing.
3's attempt at fixing things only made things worse, as those feelings became love for a friend, someone important, but not a romantic kind JUST yet. 4 was someone they couldn't bear losing. In their attempts to protect them, they invalidated 4's own feelings (which I'm pretty sure you covered), which resulted in the fight.
I think it would be safe to say that it was when 3 realized how much of the problem they'd inadvertently contributed to, that they also began to love 4 more than as a friend. But it's a bit hard to notice that when you're getting your face mashed up.
Post hospital stay, 3 finally realized that love and became super gay for 4, as seen by the inner 3 reactions.
As for 4's journey, it was very similar in that it wasn't until they were smashing 3's face in that they realized, in those moments with their hands covered in 3's blood, in the moments that they spent with them in the hospital, that some of their own feelings might be turning to love.
Of course, the main feeling during the fight was anger and then horror, but shit happens.
Sorry for the way too long ask, but I've loved your 4 and 3 comics (8 and 4 were super emotional as well, and I greatly enjoyed those ones) and just had to share! ^^;;
You got a lot of it right! Though, the gay doesnt come til after Project Piranesi/Oceanic Labyrinth -- 3's "I love you" in Break is a platonic one, a feeling they held ever since they met, and a feeling that never went away even when they parted.
The relationship strained bc 4 went off and experienced hell in college. She developed a self loathing, and took a break from there. SHe hoped that 3 would be able to fix the issue bc hey...they always know what to do with her (her thought here is "Make me a perfect agent, continue what youve been doing before")... but that didnt happen.
3, now the Captain, taken off the field and directly responsible for the lives of the agents, has become more battle hardened and strict in their duties. They drill the agents to make sure they dont suffer what they did (falling to Tartar specifically), done out of a place of care and love. Theyre scared, really, they feel all this responsibility, add the fact that they dont like acknowledging that they may not be able to save everyone like they usually do before (due to their disability).
They heard 4s pleas and tried to turn her to what she wants. Maybe more. They knew shed surpass them. Its inevitable.
They only wanted her to be the best self she can be. Protect her -- they finally got her back, theyre not losing her again -- even if their methods only served to strain their friendship further.
A huge misunderstanding of 3s motives leads to bitterness from 4. They were her best friend. Now theyre...just like everyone else in college. Disappointed in her (no theyre not). She strived to be whatever perfection they wanted from her. Maybe if she got there, shed stop hating herself. If she got there, maybe theyd love her again (they always did, if...not expressed properly).
Leads to the duel after 3 forced a Leave on her, yada yada.... they make up for lost time after, hanging out as friends again until 4 is confident/feels supported enough to return to agent duties.
In those further duties, 4 starts growing. Finally growing in the right direction. Her confidence swelling to be almost the same as before she went to college (but not completely). I think tje romantic feelings start here? Not sure yet. But its def after time spent together as pals and supporting each other through several of their internal struggles (4 and her self-image, 3 and their limitations)
The Captain's right hand.
The confession likely happens after 4 saves 3 from some situation in Project Piranesi! Consider it a knight saving her monarch from danger.
Thank you sm for the ask! Im glad I managed to get most of my points across in the comics wehe
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