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burst-of-iridescent · 2 months

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South Asian and Hindu Influences in ATLA (Part 2)

disclaimer: i was raised culturally and religiously hindu, and though i've tried to do my research for this post and pair it with my own cultural knowledge, i'm not an expert on hinduism by any means. should i mess up, please let me know.

please also be aware that many of the concepts discussed in this post overlap heavily with religions such as buddhism and jainism, which might have different interpretations and representations. as i'm not from those religions or cultures, i don't want to speak on them, but if anyone with that knowledge wishes to add on, please feel free.

Part 1

In the previous post, I discussed some of the things ATLA got right in its depictions of desi and hindu cultures. unfortunately, they also got plenty of things wrong - often in ways that leaned towards racist caricatures - so let's break them down, starting with...

Guru Pathik

both the word "guru" and name "pathik" come from sanskrit. pathik means "traveler" or "he who knows the way" while guru is a term for a guide or mentor, similar to a teacher.

gurus were responsible for the very first education systems in ancient india, setting up institutions called gurukuls. students, referred to as disciples, would often spend years living with and learning from their gurus in these gurukuls, studying vedic and buddhist texts, philosophy, music and even martial arts.

however, their learning was not limited merely to academic study, as gurus were also responsible for guiding the spiritual evolution of their disciples. it was common for disciples to meditate, practice yoga, fast for days or weeks, and complete mundane household chores every day in order to instill them with self-discipline and help them achieve enlightenment and spiritual awareness. the relationship between a guru and his disciple was considered a sacred, holy bond, far exceeding that of a mere teacher and student.

aang's training with guru pathik mirrors some of these elements. similar to real gurus, pathik takes on the role of aang's spiritual mentor. he guides aang in unblocking his chakras and mastering the avatar state through meditation, fasting, and self-reflection - all of which are practices that would have likely been encouraged in disciples by their gurus.

pathik's design also takes inspiration from sadhus, holy men who renounced their worldly ties to follow a path of spiritual discipline. the guru's simple, nondescript clothing and hair are reflective of the ascetic lifestyle sadhus are expected to lead, giving up material belongings and desires in order to achieve spiritual enlightenment and, ultimately, liberation from the reincarnation cycle.

unfortunately, this is where the respectful references end because everything else about guru pathik was insensitive at best and stereotypical at worst.

it is extremely distasteful that the guru speaks with an overexaggerated indian accent, even though the iranian-indian actor who plays him has a naturally british accent. why not just hire an actual indian voice actor if the intention was to make pathik sound authentic? besides, i doubt authenticity was the sole intention, given that the purposeful distortion of indian accents was a common racist trope played for comedy in early 2000s children's media (see: phineas and ferb, diary of a wimpy kid, jessie... the list goes on).

furthermore, while pathik is presented a wise and respected figure within this episode, his next (and last) appearance in the show is entirely the opposite.

in the episode nightmares and daydreams, pathik appears in aang's nightmare with six hands, holding what appears to be a veena (a classical indian music instrument). this references the iconography of the hindu deity Saraswati, the goddess of wisdom and knowledge. the embodiment of divine enlightenment, learning, insight and truth, Saraswati is a member of the Tridevi (the female version of the Trimurti), one of the most respected and revered goddesses in the Hindu pantheon... and her likeness is used for a cheap laugh on a character who's already treated as a caricature.

that's bad enough on its own, but when you consider that guru pathik is the only explicitly south asian coded character in the entire show, it's downright insulting. for a show that took so many of its foundational concepts from south asia and hinduism and yet provided almost no desi representation in return, this is just rubbing salt in the wound.

Chakras

"chakra", meaning "circle" or "wheel of life" in sanskrit, refers to sources of energy found in the human body. chakra points are aligned along the spine, with energy flowing from the lowest to the highest point. the energy pooled at the lowest chakra is called kundalini, and the aim is to release this energy to the highest chakra in order to achieve spiritual enlightenment and consciousness.

the number of chakras varies in different religions, with buddhism referencing five chakras while hinduism has seven. atla draws from the latter influence, so let's take a look at the seven chakras:

Muladhara (the Root Chakra). located at the base of the spine, this chakra deals with our basest instincts and is linked to the element of earth.

Swadhisthana (the Sacral Chakra). located just below the navel, this chakra deals with emotional intensity and pleasure and is linked to the element of water.

Manipura (the Solar Plexus Chakra). located in the stomach, this chakra deals with willpower and self-acceptance and is linked to the element of fire.

Anahata (the Heart Chakra). located in the heart, this chakra deals with love, compassion and forgiveness and is linked to the element of air. in the show, this chakra is blocked by aang's grief over the loss of the air nomads, which is a nice elemental allusion.

Vishudda (the Throat Chakra). located at the base of the throat, this chakra deals with communication and honesty and is linked to the fifth classical element of space. the show calls this the Sound Chakra, though i'm unsure where they got that from.

Ajna (the Third Eye Chakra). located in the centre of the forehead, this chakra deals with spirituality and insight and is also linked to the element of space. the show calls it the Light Chakra, which is fairly close.

Sahasrara (the Crown Chakra). located at the very top of the head, this chakra deals with pure cosmic consciousness and is also linked to the element of space. it makes perfect sense that this would be the final chakra aang has to unblock in order to connect with the avatar spirit, since the crown chakra is meant to be the point of communion with one's deepest, truest self.

the show follows these associations and descriptions almost verbatim, and does a good job linking the individual chakras to their associated struggles in aang's arc.

Cosmic Energy

the idea of chakras is associated with the concept of shakti, which refers to the life-giving energy that flows throughout the universe and within every individual.

the idea of shakti is a fundamentally unifying one, stating that all living beings are connected to one another and the universe through the cosmic energy that flows through us all. this philosophy is referenced both in the swamp episode and in guru pathik telling aang that the greatest illusion in the world is that of separation - after all, how can there be any real separation when every life is sustained by the same force?

this is also why aang needing to let go of katara did not, as he mistakenly assumed, mean he had to stop loving her. rather, the point of shedding earthly attachment is to allow one to become more attuned to shakti, both within oneself and others. ironically, in letting go of katara and allowing himself to commune with the divine energy of the universe instead, aang would have been more connected to her - not less.

The Avatar State

according to hinduism, there are five classical elements known as pancha bhuta that form the foundations of all creation: air, water, earth, fire, and space/atmosphere.

obviously, atla borrows this concept in making a world entirely based on the four classical elements. but looking at how the avatar spirit is portrayed as a giant version of aang suspended in mid-air, far above the earth, it's possible that this could reference the fifth liminal element of space as well.

admittedly this might be a bit of a reach, but personally i find it a neat piece of worldbuilding that could further explain the power of the avatar. compared to anyone else who might be able to master only one element, mastering all five means having control of every building block of the world. this would allow the avatar to be far more attuned to the spiritual energy within the universe - and themselves - as a result, setting in motion the endless cycle of death and rebirth that would connect their soul even across lifetimes.

#atla #atla cultural influences #hinduism in atla #welp i thought this would be the last part but i ended up having more to talk about than i thought #so i'll save the book 3 inspirations for the next post #including my absolute favourite combustion man #and by favourite i mean kill it with fire why did you ever think this was okay to do writers

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yellowymellon · 24 days

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I BROUGHT YALL ANOTHER CRAZY THEORY

not mine actually it's from tieba, ppl are theorizing that sunday is possibly going to get recruited by elio. fascinating yet crazy right? LEMME LAY EVERYTHING DOWN

okay so sunday's design is very much inspired of ena, both his old one and the new one. it has many eyes, the halo, the golden accents. not to mention his personality that resonates with her path.

this will not make sense if u dont pay attention to elio's concept art (most likely will change by the time he appears but) here it is :

notice the amount of eyes, the sun and the similar patterns, a picture of ena for reference :

they also said that ena seems to be holding a puppet string and it could be related to "destiny's slave", i dont completely agree but it's A COOL THEORY!!

i've always assumed elio to be an omen vanguard of terminus the aeon of finality. since he has blessing/curse of seeing the future unlike finality followers i believed he might be our first finality emenator BUT! emenators could follow a different path, it's so interesting to think he could be a finality emenator but an order follower, and it makes sense! who would greatly seek to stop nanook and restore balance? well hooh too but ena would very much dedicate themselves in stopping nanook. now ena is debatably dead but paths don't disappear. but keep in mind we actually don't know which aeon gives the stellaron hunters powers.

so far we don't know what the stellaron in penacony does, it doesnt seem to be the threat itself but the one who obtains it might be dangerous. that's why elio wants the nameless to go after the stellaron. but that doesnt make THAT much sense either, why wouldn't the stellaron hunters themsleves do the job? they're already capable. if u ask me penacony feels the best place for kafka/SW instead, it might be easier for us to obtain it if we help the family but anyways- we can go on forever abt why it's not right so lets force this theory to make sense tehee~

i talked abt how sunday might learn a truth after his "death", gallagher's voice line abt him is "He reminds me of the "Odes of Harmony," but I caught a whiff of something behind the facade he puts on... something real." the odes of harmony is basically a song praising xipe, he means sunday being a reserved religious saint like person, is a facade and gallagher saw something real. based on my post where i discovered that i'm a follower of nous after all (i'm not-) https://www.tumblr.com/yellowymellon/746431759854551040/you-know-it-would-be-funny-if-the-actual-villain?source=share

gallagher might've caught on it earlier and targeted sunday from all the family heads, if he was going to kill in any case he needed the best victims that could give him the break through he needed, robin might've been just the stepping stone to kill the oak family head (important) who conveniently might be the one to side with him (YALL IM COOKING AND IT'S BURNING)

sunday is described as perfect on the outside but secretly a freak, he shows no mercy to what he thinks is wrong and doesn't compromise. but i don't trust him with what he thinks is wrong. he might be shrewd and manipulative fitting for a head, but still young and emotional to make absolutes (judgements). see, the family is a perpetrator to many MANY evil stuff that shouldn't be in his book (literally lol)

u see where i'm going? me neither elio could potentially need to ally with sunday if his stance changes after learning the whole, purest truth

#elio and sunday? in the same sentence? ITS HEAVEN #maybe it's me coping maybe im unto something (death)#nah ill do 10 last pulls if gallgher comes home this theory IS CORRECT #i saw tiny pic spoilers from 2.2 cuz they're everywhere in twitter and i feel like i'm cooking LET ME COOK PLS WAAAAA #my genius is sometimes too frightening ikik #hsr spoilers #honkai star rail #hsr #hsr sunday #hsr gallagher #if there's typos know that i can't spell #penacony #hsr elio

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darkanddirtyknb · 4 months

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Important Notice

I want to give a warm hello to all of my beautiful like-minded freaks, creeps, and horny little toads. We have had quite the journey together. It's hard to believe I started my blog and Patreon so long ago. Sometimes it's painful to reflect on because I was in a much better place when I started my blog. But we learn to live with the hand we receive in life, and that's what I'm doing. Which brings me to the reason I'm posting this today. This has been a long time coming, and I suppose I've been putting it off because I haven't wanted to admit it to myself. I've been in such a period of stasis. But I kept trying to convince myself that I could return to how I used to be—putting out content like the wind, writing commissions, having deep discussions and long conversations with my supporters, and so on. But the truth is, I just can't do it anymore. My body has taken a toll on me, and my fire has burned out. My physical health (and sometimes mental) has taken its course, and this is the path I have no choice but to follow. However, despite the war I'm waging with my body, there is good news. I won my disability claim. I'm not making much, but it's enough that I can support myself monetarily. So, I will be closing my Patreon. I'll also no longer be writing commissions for the foreseeable future. I've been delaying this part of my announcement because I hate letting people down. My Patreon aside, I made a lot of promises to people that I couldn't keep. For that, I'm sorry. I never accepted any money for work I didn't start, so I owe no one anything in a monetary way. But I will be letting people down, and that truly bothers me. If you were in line for a story, I give you my sincerest apologies from the bottom of my heart. If you feel like I let you down in any way, I'm sorry for that too. That said, to be fair, I didn't know this was going to happen to me. I hold no control over the turns my health takes, and if I could change it, I would. I will still post from time to time. I'm not giving up on writing. But what once took me one to two days now takes me weeks, sometimes months to finish. I will still be around, and I will still engage with my followers. I'm not disappearing. My health may have won this round, but I won't let it take me down. I've come too far to give up what I love. I actually have a very detailed story in the works, and come hell or high water, I will finish it. I want to thank everyone who has stuck by my side. To everyone who has supported me, shared talks with me, read my works, liked my stories, and left comments—thank you. These things have helped me through some of my darkest hours. As for my Patrons, hopefully, by closing my account this month, you'll be able to have some extra money after the holidays. I want to give a special thank you to you. You kept me afloat by helping me pay for necessities like my medication, food, gas for medical appointments, and more. Without you, I truly don't know how I would have reached this point in my life. I hope there are no hard feelings. I'm doing what I need to for myself, but also, what I feel is best. If I get a second wind, I might write those stories still jotted down on my whiteboard. You never know. Lastly, I want to share another piece of good news. My parents surprised me with a new friend. I will post pictures of her below. Her name is Luna. (Not after Luna Lovegood, but our Lord and Savior, The Moon.) She has certainly kept me on my toes, and I'm not sure she's been the best thing when it comes to my disabilities, considering I can barely keep up with her. But I'm in love, and I know that ultimately, she'll be well worth the hassle—which she most definitely is right now. She's a right pain in the ass. I'm pretty sure she's a quarter Gremlin, a quarter Audrey 2, and two-quarters Piranha. I'm sending all my love to everyone. I hope you have a wonderful holiday season. If you have any questions or just want to shoot me a message please don't hesitate. Please take care of yourselves. It's dangerous business out there. Much love, Kai

#out of bounds #update #personal #important #i'm not crying you're crying #i'm really not but this was hard to write #it's bittersweet #luna

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spaceyaceface · 9 months

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I should have specified that it wasn't just your writing that put me off on you, but if I ever said anything to your face in the server, everyone would be clamoring to defend the "Patron Saint."

Which by the way, whoever said that? Was it in the DMs for you to repeat with pride like a badge of honor to feel special? I'm all for people spending time talking, drawing, or writing about the things they love, but every other message that comes from your finger tips makes me feel exhausted. Like I don't even want to be apart of this fandom and accidentally support someone like you.

You've misrepresented disabled peeps, gone off on rants for them when hello - let us speak for ourselves maybe? With attention seeking behavior of bragging about your organization skills, only speaking to those that are popular, and by creating an entire archive as if us writers will disappear. If we do disappear, that's none of your business and not your job to preserve what we put out. Ao3 and Wattpadd exist anyway for us to use if we choose to.

You can pretend all you like that you're living rent-free in my head, that you're speshul to get hate, but truth is - I've seen what kind of person you are and I'm fucking tired of you. I'm tired of people like you, who have the loudest voices and refuse to let others speak for themselves. Who can't allow the conversation to drift off away from them in group settings, and I'm tired of everyone who would have a heart attack if I said one bad thing about you as though you are a literal saint. You aren't a nice person, you're just as bad as me - but at least I have the balls to be fucking honest with people and know when to shut up.

???? I am genuinely confused by a majority of what was said here, and please know that this is the last time I'll respond to you, anon.

Let's get the first thing straight. You don't like what I do? Block me. I don't care. The fact that you said server inclines me to think that we may have crossed paths on discord, and if so, please feel free to block me there, too.

Second, the whole "patron saint" thing is a joke because a while back, there was very little Ominis fanfic being written, so I started writing a bunch. Someone left a comment jokingly calling me 'the patron saint of ominis fics', which I thought was funny, and a couple other people also commented. So, as I joke I added it to my bio. End of story. It's not because I'm better than anyone or perfect or anything like that. It's a joke that I went along with.

While Ominis is disabled, I truly do my best to represent him the best I can. If I've ever said anything hurtful or wrong, then I am sorry about that. I would have greatly appreciated a kind critique letting me know what I've done incorrectly, to better that in the future. Besides Ominis, I have written ONE (1) other fic with a disabled character, which was specifically requested by a disabled person in which I did my best to follow their prompt exactly. I don't know what rants you're talking about. I have actually tried by best to stay away from most things regarding disability, because I myself am not disabled, and therefore have no experience in those conversations. I've made a conscious effort not to get involved in that, besides being a listening ear when others speak on it. However, it's inevitable that I'd touch on it briefly in the fics I write, as Ominis is fucking blind.

Again, any sort of pointers or comments on how to improve these interactions I've written would have been appreciated. How was I ever supposed to learn when no one has told me I'm doing something wrong?

As far as the archive goes, I just randomly suggested putting together lists of all the fics I could find---IT'S NOT THAT DEEP. I have no clue why this would annoy you, but once again, BLOCK IT IF YOU DON'T WANT TO SEE IT. I've seen it done in other fandoms, thought it would be fun, others seemed to like the idea, and tada. Fun fact, if writers delete their writings, it the links won't work. They can still make it disappear if they want. I've said it on the sideblog, if people don't want their work on there, I will take it off, no questions asked. I just figured that since they're publicly posting to the internet, it's pretty much fair game.

I also do my best to interact with each and every person who does the same to me---I'm bad at initiating interactions because I have fucking awful anxiety and OCD, which also accounts for the "organizational skills" I brag about. I try to be as genuine and show my appreciation for all the people who are kind to me, because I am absolutely baffled anyone would take the time of day to say a nice thing to me. If you feel I talk about myself too much, then whatever. I use the internet to vent, whether on here or on discord.

And here I'm about to say the rudest thing I ever have on the internet, and it's this: I am not nearly as bad as you. Never in my life have I left anyone a nasty message full of personal attacks and accusations under the guise of "honesty." Nor will I ever do that, because there is enough hate and heartache in the world already. This behavior that you've displayed is the worst part of internet/fandom culture.

I'd like to bring this back full circle: Block me. If you check my blog again to see if I've responded, then obviously I'm at least somewhat living in your head. For the sake of both your mental health and my own, eliminate the tension by stopping here. You have no idea who I am so don't pretend for a second that you do.

For everyone else who had to read this, thanks for your support. I won't stop talking about myself or writing things I love, even if they're meaningless. I will never be replying to another hate comment on this blog.

#ace talks #hate comment #thanks for clearing that up

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yooniesim · 5 months

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tw: death mention, cancer mention, oversharing, long-winded self-reflection, far too many paragraphs

The strides I have made with my temper in the past year... real talk... I'm proud. It's been hard to manage myself and keep from popping off but I've been making a lot of progress removing myself from situations that get me heated, irl or online, and I'm happy about that. It doesn't remove my feelings or the damage I've caused with my anger in the past but I feel like I'm making real progress. Even though my depression and overall mental health varies, I feel like temper wise I'm in a lot better place than I was a year ago. I've been staying away from people irl that fed into my anger by being neglectful or abusive to me, and tried my best to work on my own actions at the same time.

I'm also proud of where I'm at with my blog comparatively. I've been working hard to focus on the good things and what makes me and others happy, rather than falling into a pit of negativity. I feel like I can still express myself from time to time, while also being better able to know what is appropriate to say and when. Idk if this is just especially ND of me but I feel as if I had the belief that as long as I felt whatever I was saying was the truth, it was appropriate, and that the negativity wouldn't get to me if I stayed by that metric always. But that isn't always the case, and i'm getting better at evaluating that. At realizing that, even with good intentions, getting wrapped up in all the issues of the world and all the negative discussions can be almost a form of self-harm.

Not many people know about this, but the trauma i experienced during the pandemic really affected me and changed me a lot. If you're a long time follower comparing how I was pre-2020 and after, it probably feels like I changed completely as a person, because I did. I don't speak about it a lot, especially now that it feels like the entire world has... moved on, but. Being a healthcare worker then felt like seeing your own slice of hell. Seeing that much death firsthand and being so afraid every single day, being confronted with your own mortality and that of your loved ones, it's extremely difficult. Especially since I lost a very close relative to a drawn out battle with cancer, who I was a caregiver to, as well. Between that and finally being medicated for the first time in my life, i became numb, and at the same time, I became angry. Angry at every little injustice that crossed my path. I wanted to fix something, anything- even in a silly little community for a silly little sims game. I thought, maybe, shining a light on things I saw that were wrong- scamming, doxxing, bigotry- might help. I broke myself apart trying to do that. And... for what, really? I accomplished nothing. And to this day still deal with people that boil me down to just... a hater, I guess. Too annoying for their personal tastes. As if that alone justifies some of the truly vile things that have been said and done to me, publicly and privately. That continue over a year after the fact. Even now it's difficult to think about sometimes.

I've made many mistakes here. Being an inexperienced and flat out incompetent server owner, to start. But with that, too, I've made progress. I'm so grateful for the mod team I have in Sutopia now. For the loving community that's risen from the ashes of what was once an overly negative space. For me getting a handle on my own love of petty gossip, a fatal flaw. For me learning how to ban instigating and toxic parties instead of naively giving them the benefit of the doubt. I still struggle- because as much as people might think I'm harsh, seeing as I try to put up that front as much as possible, I'm actually far too forgiving to the point of stupidity at times. I've been paralyzed by indecision in the past, not wanting to hurt anyone by mistake with the wrong call, and wound up hurting everyone involved with my inaction instead. But I know now that I have a more experienced team beside me that helps so much with these decisions and ensuring a safe place for everyone. And that's taken a weight off of me for sure.

Occasionally, still, the anger gets to me. I see someone that I know for a fact has scammed someone, or hurt someone, or flat out lied, or harassed me in anons or said something racist about me in private that they have no idea I know about- and they're just continuing on, getting love and adoration over their sims or cc or something, and it gets to me. I want to post, I want to blast everything on here and say, look! They're not what you think! Look what they did! Look who they really are! But then I breathe, and I think. Would it really help? Would it really do anything? Would I be opening myself up to be attacked and hurt for nothing? And I come to the humbling conclusion that it's not worth it. Not worth it for them to come back in a month with a new name and all their friends welcome them back like nothing happened and so simblr continues on as it always has. And I'm just a "hater" that's probably jealous of how many friends they have or how much money they make whatever other egotistical explanation they'd spout after everyone inevitably forgot what really happened. Occasionally, it makes me feel a little sick.

But, I breathe through it. I'm getting better at that. Sometimes I write something long out in the drafts- like I'm doing now- and delete it right away instead of posting it. It helps. Even though sometimes I feel guilty. I think about the anons I used to get, the people saying they were too scared to call out certain creators for certain actions because of how big they were and how much hate their followers would send, I think about the asks I still have in my inbox of screenshots and proof. About how sometimes people would thank me for saying things they couldn't bring themselves to. That I was the only person doing it. The only person who wasn't afraid. Even though I was only "unafraid" because I could barely feel anything at the time. And I don't even have that "advantage" anymore. But it weighs on me thinking that I should be trying to help them still. But how can I help anybody? I'm biased, too. I make mistakes. I've made so many mistakes. What gives me the right to say anything? Being put on that pedestal and having that responsibility on my shoulders- stupid as it was from the bigger perspective of life- hurt me, too. Because no one has the right takes every time, and having the wrong one on occasion doesn't automatically make you a terrible person. But it's extremely difficult for people on the internet to understand that. Sometimes I feel used when I remember those times. Chewed up and spat out, once the flavor wore off. And violated, not by the anons or anyone that disliked me, but by people I thought were friends. That's always the worst part to think about.

.....Until I decide it's time to leave, anyway. Then you're all going down.

It's better not to expose myself, or others, to that again. Is that growth? I don't know. I still struggle with so many emotions. The anger, and the guilt. Regret and sadness. But then, I've also felt so much joy from here, too. When I talk to people in the server, when I help people here with their cc projects/requests, when I read people's stories, when I talk to nice anons. I still love talking to anons so much, and want to have in-depth, rambling discussions with them again! I love to laugh with my mutuals and share our silly little sims together. And, god, sometimes I feel relief. Like, there's nothing for me to prove, no one for me to impress. I can do whatever I want and not worry, because well- so what if I get blocked? Or talked about? Like what else is new lol. I don't need to focus on the community. I just need to focus on me, my posts, my mutuals I already know are kind people. It's a freeing feeling. And it makes continuing to express myself here worth it. I want to concentrate on that. The positivity, the love. The creativity. The people here that warm my heart with their kindness. So I think, as we continue into December and into the New Year, and every year I'm here beyond that, that's what I'll do. Continue to grow, and share the love.

#ceci speaks #nonsims #text #negative #kinda?#ceci speaks a lot more #rambling at night bc depression #kinda positive at the same time tho!#simblr's boogeyman has a heart #yoonie steals christmas #gif warning #get ur screenshot tools out folks its that time again #📸#ceci needs to go back to therapy #yeah yeah im workin on it

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incarnateirony · 1 year

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*pretends to be man of the people*

*uses ‘pleb�� as an insult*

Yeah, it's not The People I'm correcting. It's the man who class jumps by ripping tens of thousands of dollars out of people's pockets with lies and playing great information pretender after more than half a decade of failure. (2po and the collective leak fail history of all his friends that endorse his behaviors in spnscripthunt)

Him.

He's a pleb.

Also, Man of the People? I'm a Man of the Truth. Fuck people. People suck. It's where creatures like you come from. Your entire problem with me is that I'm NOT a media plebian like yall, and that no amount of your cool girl socialite club bullshit of rumors and pay passes has ever been able to touch me. You guys actually think everyone ELSE are plebs, and it drives you insane when I shatter your reality bubble and like. No, you're plebs too, maybe more plebian than the people you look down on.

Yeah. You know what. You're a pleb too. Thanks for helping me realize that.

And yknow, that's why the few times over several years I've used the word Pleb or Plebian, you pearl clutch like this. Because you do, in fact, always consider everyone else plebian compared to your social circle, then I remind you that social circle is just a plebian consumer illusion, and you all piss your pants, because now the plebes are telling you that you're actually plebes, and how dare you, to misguided paypass upper class bitches, that's like, the worst insult imaginable, I guess. Then normal people are just "lmao. plebe"

it's like yall trust fund babies and married-rich nobodies literally can't take "you realize you're just normal people and consumers" without letting out pterodactyl noises of offense. Your parents lied to you. You're not special. Society lied to you. Not everything can be answered with money.

Experience, ingenuity and labor always win out on actually *accomplishing things*, even if it takes years while people like you kick your feet up. Since y'all never know where to go without a consumer announcement of where to spend your next money. the rest of us had a path, sorry.

And even some of them are Poor People, but they're not plebs. That's not what this is. You know what this is. It's that, for the first time in your lives, you're the plebs, and the Small Name Fans and Unknowns just ran circles around you for years and took everything from you.

I'm not even a true BNF. Y'all treat me like one because you're so threatened by me, but I've never cared about the size of my following, and The Truth was never popular in any lane until S15 or here. I got like 3500 followers after 6 years. By now most of those are idle accounts. I'm like. A Mid Name Fan at best. I'm the Big Name Fan of Small Name Fans who has never had to pay a dime for what I accomplish and teaches others how to do the same in what's joked as CIA grade operations people learn, and it drives you fucking bananas, because you can't stop us.

While you're at it, you guys are really attacking the wrong person again-still. Like, guys I meant it when I said I'm out of putting in the aforementioned labor. I've created an entire system to Not Be Involved. There's new rooms and methods and a new crowmaster (Crowmaster in training? Ig? Since sometimes I still have to say where to send things).

it is what it is but you're just basically yelling at a rando that knows things that you hate being real, now. If you wanna bother the actual messenger these days, you're in the wrong box.

Now feel free to be haunted by looking for crows at your conventions forevermore. Or at least till the end of February, where I imagine most of you will begin like a 2 month long dramatic ragequit.

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peterlorres21stcentury · 1 year

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new story treatment

ohhh I told myself not to start a new story before I finished the other one, but some unknown force from somewhere is DEMANDING this one real bad. (uhh, Peter, is that you?) I hope I can actually finish it in a timely manner.

some notes to myself, and to share the mental images that refuse to leave my brain (as always if you have any ideas you're dying to see, I would love to incorporate them and I will credit you!)

takes place in 1951, on the set of Der Verlorene. Renate Holzmann, sad PL fangirl from the old Weimar days before the word "fangirl" was even a thing, has returned to Germany for a chance to work on his movie. She and Peter are happily reunited (she has been following him ever since she first saw him on stage 17 years prior, in one of my previous fics) and he gives her a job of general assistant/script girl/cat wrangler/basically any small task that needs doing. She is shy and a little out of her depth at first but the cast and crew are fond of her. Just like when she was younger and hung out at the stage door for a glimpse of her idol after the show, she becomes a sort of favored mascot to the actors. "Maybe she will bring us luck again," Peter smiles.

seems ideal, right? Renate is finally happy doing something she loves. But the production itself is turbulent and plagued with technical problems. This might be bad enough, but there are also tensions when another woman appears on set, Annemarie, with whom Peter seems to be in love. No one else can figure out if she actually does any work around here, She's kind of clingy and possessive of their director, and her presence is starting to grate.

Peter makes unexplained disappearances from time to time that nobody comments on. At first Renate doesn't give it much thought, either--perhaps he drank more coffee than his bladder could handle--but in truth he's been concealing a lifelong addiction. Renate discovers this one day when they happen to cross paths in the hall and he's too exhausted to run up the stairs to his room to get the needle. He's shaking and sweaty and Renate volunteers to get the "medicine" for him, thinking naively that he needs heart meds or something. She learns the truth when she fetches the bag and finds the syringes, and she flashes back violently to a time when she saw him use it before, one night backstage long ago. But she brings it to him anyway, and watches him self-administer the drug. He is not proud of it and is sorry she had to see that. "I've seen it before," she admits, and he shuts his eyes in remembrance. "So you have. I forgot."

I'd like a scene were they find themselves with a lot of stray animals hanging around on-location, mostly because Peter has a soft heart for the homeless cats and dogs of all Hamburg. One day they see a large black dog approaching, much like the dog Renate's uncle used to have, and she thinks back to her childhood days with bittersweetness. The dog is friendly and greets Peter happily, drawn straight to him, but it is no stray. The real owner whistles and the dog bounds away, but not before licking Renate's hands.

I'd also like a scene where she and Peter meet one-on-one in his cabin, just like he met with all the actors individually. She's a little confused as to why, but it turns out he wants to talk to her about the past (and maybe something else that turns romantic??)

at some point Renate and Annemarie, both harboring a mutual mistrust, have a verbal confrontation, arguing about who really has Peter's best interests in mind here. Annemarie, as she consoles a weary Peter, furiously expresses that she absolutely doesn't want Renate around anymore, but Peter does not have the heart to send her away.

this story will follow the production woes pretty closely, complete with the fire that destroyed the first cut of the film. Renate will work doubly hard to make sure the film has an audience, and volunteers to work the projector at the premiere, but despite everyone's best efforts the film is not received well. As everyone packs up and Peter prepares to return to the States again, Renate promises him that the film truly is a work of art, even if no one wanted to hear what he had to say. It is their loss alone.

#peter lorre #fanfic #der verlorene #I always wanted to go back to Renate's life story #this should be fun but I just need a good ending #should she and Peter finally have the affair she has been dreaming of??

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randomcanbian · 1 year

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Do you recommend any good Blue Lions fics? I really can't find any good one that catches my interest because most are either just Edelgard bash fics or have the discomfort ship (dmlth)

Anon, you and I are in the same boat 😭 (Also lmfao, D*mileth being a discomfort ship is such a big mood (and thank you for the term ahaha)--love them platonically, but them romantically (if not in a polycule with another girl) makes me break out in hives 🥲)

I tried my best tho! Took me a while to answer this cause I had to take a deep dive into my bookmarks--I tend to gravitate towards Black Eagles / Golden Deer fics because of the risk of Edelgard-bashing from BL fans, so I don't have a lot of AM fics on-hand :(

Disclaimer: I didn't include shippy BL fic one-shots, as I assumed you're looking for recs that would feature more of the crew / things found in AM but not in other routes! But if you're down with those, I do have a bunch of BL/Hegemon!Edelgard x Byleth fics on hand 😂

------------------

[Post-AM]

1. Our Own Paths by jtav (WIP)

Byleth meant only to rewind time and knock away a dagger. Something goes wrong and Edelgard becomes a half-mad beast. Dimitri begs her to save his sister and Byleth reluctantly agrees. (rcb note: Technically an AU, but eh. Anyway, it's one of my favorites among the fics I've discovered recently. In the author's notes this is what it says: "This is very much AM El with all that implies. But…this is also a story that believes radical reform was necessary by an author whose favorite route is CF" and it's really evident in their fic ehehe. It's an exploration into the trauma and guilt and grief that Edelgard's war sets onto Fodlan--while it may have been ultimately necessary (armed reformation vs "peaceful" reformation which may merely prolong the suffering of the people, if it would even work at all), a righteous cause and the promise of a brighter future still can't wash away the blood that's been shed or the horrors that they've all endured. I also love the conflict that comes up between the Adrestians and El--both parties learning from each other their reasons for the roles in the war...just, really really good stuff :) )

[Alternate Universe Fics]

1. An Eagle Among Lions by AMX004_Qubeley (Completed)

The morning after her and Byleth's wedding, Emperor Edelgard von Hresvelg wakes up in her old bedroom in Garreg Mach to discover that she has brown hair, only one Crest, ten happy and healthy brothers and sisters, and a bad habit of sleeping through her professor's lectures. (rcb note: Let's assume you aren't the same anon as the one who recc'd this to me hehe. Anyway, I gush about this fic here :) )

2. outwit even death by Volossya (WIP)

In which Byleth saves the Edelgards of Silver Snow, Verdant Wind, and Azure Moon by dragging them through time to the beginning of Crimson Flower. Fodlan will never be the same. (rcb note: not really BL, but it has AM!Edelgard at least? Just wanted to recc it, I find it really interesting :) )

3. The Lion and The Lotus by WithPatienceComesPeace (WIP)

The Prince of Faerghus unites with a mysterious Professor from Duscur to uncover the Truth about the Lambert Assassination. (rcb note: The MC is an OC, and the fic follows the Blue Lions, however Byleth is the Black Eagle's Professor. I confess that I've mostly just read the few parts that had Byleth in it, but I did check out some other chapters and they looked quite well-written and interesting! From what I gathered, Duscur is sort of a fantasy!India and that's where the MC is from. The worldbuilding is amazing, altho I don't know what the plot is haha, but I'm certain it's good. I love the MC interacting with Dedue and Dimitri, and the former 2 bonding over the culture and grieving the loss of Duscur together. The MC's interactions with the other BL's great as well, and from what I've read, the author has a great grasp on their characters! Once I'm done with my Byleth-centric binging I actually do plan to go back to this fic and read it in its entirety :) )

#fic recs #asks #fe3h #I'll reblog this with any additional that i come across!!!#I remember reading this /really/ good Merceleth fic in 2019/2020 which iirc was set in AM but I can't find it anymore :(

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lumarijosonn · 2 years

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BLOG

Lu Mari Joson

There are seven billion people on our planet, and each individual is unique. Nothing in this world exists without a purpose. Everything serves a purpose. Humans are the best creation, and each individual is unique. As a result of writing about myself, I'm here to express myself about what I see, what I experience, and what I intend to do with my life. I strive to be modest, enthusiastic, devoted, industrious, and truthful.

Hi! I am LU MARI JOSON, 17 years of age came from the province of Isabela. I love playing badminton and table tennis. I love taking pics of skies and sunsets it makes me feel fulfilled and free. I also enjoy reading. I, too, am an ambitious individual who relishes taking chances. I like to do something new instead of repeating the same thing over and over again. Learning new things is something I always like doing and I keep up with current events. And no one enters this world without the help of family and friends. Actually, everything you become is solely due to your family. I am the middle child. I am the most trustworthy of my siblings. I aspire to guide and care for my younger siblings. My parents are both passionate about their jobs. My parents taught me the value of time, honesty, hard work, and dedication to a goal.

I am kind to my part that still learning and healing. I don’t take so much that was never to carry…..I set it all down whenever I'm ready. My guards are always down, fighting quietly, suffering silently, and merely surviving. A wound that’ll never heal even as much as time passes by….I’ll just let it be since it has been part of me. Slow in progression, feel like always a few steps behind, am always stuck on the same page, and find it hard to move forward because of acceptance

Life has not been easy for me, but through determination, I have been able to make the best of it. I am a really self-assured individual. go deep within yourself and think that you have the potential to overcome all of the hurdles and challenges that you experience on a daily basis. I have faith in myself. I've reached the stage where I must first believe in myself before others will. Three of the most important characteristics that have helped me succeed in life are as follows. I am a patient person. I am considerate. I am a person that is brimming with life.

I don't think much about where I want to be in ten years. To be honest, I'm worried that I'll be twenty-plus years old and that my youth will be over. One thing is certain: if God allows me to live to that age, I will make the most of my time and work hard to grow into a successful and happy person. How certain am I that in 10 years I will be where I want to be? The truth is that nothing is definite in life, thus I am truly uncertain. But if I put in the work, I can make every step worthwhile. I'm working hard to get to where I want to be in ten years. What matters is that at that moment in time, In my life, I have accomplished my objectives and assisted other people, I realized my dreams, I lived freely, and lived a life free of regrets Life is too short to waste it. Every second counts, so I must work hard and make myself happy

And yes, the STEM strand is the best option because it corresponds to the profession I want to pursue in the future. I want to expand my knowledge and abilities so that I am prepared to pursue the path I have chosen. I want to be a dentist, and the STEM strand provides subjects and information that will prepare me for the dentistry course. They will teach me the basic knowledge that will aid me when I start college.

Dentistry had sparked my attention as a career path since I was a child. Dentistry appeals to me mostly because I have always wanted to work in a field where I can help people. My interest in human biology, particularly human teeth, has also influenced my professional decision. Most importantly, I find human teeth fascinating, at times. Since of my sensitive personality, I have long known that I wanted to pursue dentistry as a career because I get to develop relationships with my patients and work face to face with many people. I'd be lying if I said that the high pay wasn't one of the reasons I chose dentistry, but on top of that, I get to satisfy the needs of every patient, help people ‘hands-on’.

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papirouge · 2 years

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I at times disagree with your social opinions, but honestly everything you have said about feminism and Christianity have helped me so much. Even the times I've been taken aback by what you said, I came back to it and really thought it through. I just wanted to say this, I have a Tumblr but I want it to be detached from religious stuff, everytime I use Tumblr for Christianity seriously it always leads to anit-feminsts and white supremacy so gross

You're very welcome anon <3 If you follow me since a while, you might have realized I'm not a people pleaser lol I follow my own lane and I might call out as much fellow Christians, radfem, tradfem, fellow Black women, etc. based on what I think is right & true. I'm not on tumblr to pull out a fake image and be all cutesy and teehee I'm just a cute Christian gworl uwu I'm too old for that. I'm not a feminist/Christian/pro life, that's why radfem hate me ; but I'm also not an anti feminist and I will never stop clowning anti feminist traditional role fetishist/marriage idolater acting like being unable to do the most basic tasks and relying on your husbandad for anything was cute. It's not. And it's borderline creepy how some of these women are like acting like a literal child was attractive or marriage material. Pedo culture really fries people's brain. You're right about the rightoid/white supremacist corner of Christian tumblr - it's been a while that I took a step back and distanced myself from them because I realized they were nothing but breeding a lot of bad energy & drama. They constantly get termed and act like tumblr was the bad guy...and not their pathological mean spirit. Whenever I see them, I can't help but thinking about Philippians 1:15-18 ; they do indeed spread the gospel but with a spirit of rivalry and dissention rather than actual charity.

I like microdosing in having a small follower count by making random takes that I know will piss people and make them unfollow me lmao Why? because I like having the best people to stick around. Open minded and fair. I'm not interested in entertaining an image of unproblematicness, especially from other Christians. Jesus was crucified because of the conspiracy led by his own Jewish fellas, not unbelievers ; so just because unbelievers dislike you doesn't mean you're still standing right before God. See how other Christians react to your testimony/apologetics and then you'll see if you follow Jesus' path or not. Christianity has NEVER been about popularity or being "likeable". So yeah, it's okay if you feel isolated and alone anon, I do too - a lot of time. But keep in mind that Jesus had few followers on his last days...every one abandoned Him..... You don't get popular by saying the truth as said in 2 Timothy 4:3. Don't trust popular "Christian bloggers"......

If you followed me until now it only proves you're a very open and considerate person and I really appreciate you're still here <3 I do too follow people that challenge my perspective on things and this is where I learned the most. For example, this is by interacting a lot in radfem that I decided to deepen my biblical study on gender roles and the place of women in the church. The way Christian/trad women dismiss the attack of radfem by simply sassy'ing them back without providing actual biblical rebuttal never sat well with me. It's like they couldn't defend their life by rational points ; it's all "radfem are mean to me because they hate me" and yes they do lol...but at least try to put out something productive out of this interaction and stop acting like a perpetual victim. As Christians we are expected to stand for our faith. IDC what tradfem try to shove into some young women's head : being weak isn't a feminine trait. Ephesians 6:10 is NOT gendered okay? Everyone should get their breastplate and their sword and be willinging to wrestle for the glory of God, okay?? lol

#answered #personal #Christian

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lumarijoson · 2 years

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BLOG

Hi! I am LU MARI JOSON, 17 years of age came from the province of Isabela. I love playing badminton and table tennis, it makes me feel fulfilled and free. I also enjoy reading. I, too, am an ambitious individual who relishes taking chances. I like to do something new instead of repeating the same thing over and over again. Learning new things is something I always like doing and I keep up with current events. And no one enters this world without the help of family and friends. Actually, everything you become is solely due to your family. I am the middle child. I am the most trustworthy of my siblings. I aspire to guide and care for my younger siblings. My parents are both passionate about their jobs. My parents taught me the value of time, honesty, hard work, and dedication to a goal.

GUIDE QUESTIONS:

-WHERE DO I SEE MYSELF 10 YEARS FROM NOW?

-WAS STEM THE BEST CHOICE AFTER ALL?

Yes, the STEM strand is the best option because it corresponds to the profession I want to pursue in the future. I want to expand my knowledge and abilities so that I am prepared to pursue the path I have chosen. I want to be a dentist, and the STEM strand provides subjects and information that will prepare me for the dentistry course. They will teach me the basic knowledge that will aid me when I start college.

- WHAT COURSE WILL YOU TAKE IN COLLEGE? WHY

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ot3 · 2 years

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hi hello i was rereading some quantum meruit pages and i was wondering! where did you learn comp like this!! its crazy distinctive and cool (you now own the primary colors, legally) and i'm curious abt ur process 👀

first of all thank you so much i really appreciate it!!

i wrote on this subject a little while back but that was almost a full year ago at this point so i've got some more to say and don't really feel like that post was super concise. that post i think tends to cover mostly the design philosophy but less about the actual mechanical execution of it so ill try and give a little of that now

i've been wanting to do a big writeup about composition for awhile now but i've been finding it really hard because the truth is it's more or less a completely intuitive process for me. i just go until it feels right. but i think the main reason my compositions look the way they do is because of my approach to tangents so i'll just talk about that + a couple other tidbits as best as im able here

there’s a lot to be said about tangents. this post is a REALLY good primer for thinking about tangents but i’ll boil it down even more to basically my own personal guiding rule: no two edges should ever touch, and no three edges should intersect.

essentially;

i will almost never break these two rules. unless i’m feeling really tired and just want to move on without micromanaging everything i will make sure that every shape on the page is organized by these principles. i would rather break the perspective or the stuff i’m drawing and make it less technically accurate if it means i can avoid a tangent.

obviously, the more shapes you have in an image the MUCH harder this becomes. gonna try and break this down with some page examples so you can see how that sort of manifests outside of a deeply abstracted visual

heres a page that has some of the most overlapping shapes out of every page in this whole shebang

overall, i managed to do a decent job keeping everything distinct but i started getting sloppier as things got more crowded and i got dick of working on it.here you can see highlighted in green every instance where i think elements get too close to sharing an edge or intersecting improperly. not a huge amount but you can see theres still a significant presence of it. but theyre all extremely small

chances are probably no one noticed these problematic areas except for me, especially the really small ones. so what’s to gain by being so anal about it? well the answer for me at least is that it allows heavy geometry to exist while still feeling organic. when things intersect abruptly or share edges it forces them into a sort of implied grid almost, and really makes everything feel much more artificial and lacking in depth than you want it to.

by being VERY careful about where and how things are allowed to touch both on the micro scale and the macro scale, it just allows me to make sure that the very flat and static images and objects in my panels still feel like theyre flowing because the way your eye is lead Between these objects doesn’t follow a stark geometric grid

heres a couple of breakdowns of what this actually looks like for larger compositional elements. when you break the ‘panels’ so to speak down into just their base shapes you can see the way theyre arranged to carefully follow these rules of overlapping and intersecting

(the phoenix ‘panel’ and mia and greg ‘panel’ in that last one have a shared edge on the left side, but thats intentional as theyre sharing a physical space)

of course, theres minor mistakes on every page. but to just be really actively considering this while i work helps me place the objects in a pleasing way

my speech bubbles also have to follow these same rules of overlap, which helps dictate the flow of the eye through the page. the way elements flow into each other is also REALLY important - you should understand exactly what paths you want your audience’s eye to follow. with comics you have the luxury of speech bubbles for that. a lot of my pages get away with disjointed paneling because of the flow of the speech bubbles.

a lot of the time this ends up looking like a big S curves to take full advantage of the proportions of the page

if i wasnt working with speech bubbles, there’d be other visual elements here that i’d use to guide the eye in a similar fashion.

heres some pages that have stuff going onto them thats closer to the way i’d direct the eye in an illustration. its super obvious and heavyhanded but that doesnt make it bad. its doing what its supposed to.

i also think understanding exactly what you’re trying to get across with the composition is critical, because the page layouts themselves convey information, rather than just being simple scaffolding that your actual visuals rest on top of, if that makes any sense.

for example these pages get forced into these strict nesting verticals, which not only provide a claustrophobic visual as things are sort of crushed between them, but theyre designed to mimic elevator doors. this is a visual motif used specifically for indicating that Edgeworth Is Freaking Out About Shit Right now.

i think that imagery is pretty clear on its own, but since i’m working in a comic format i have the small luxury of being able to establish my own visual language. a composition might not have a clear meaning on it’s first time being shown, but through repetition it becomes shorthand for conveying a certain feeling.

here’s a page composition i keep using for phoenix. none of these pages are particularly special compositionally on its own but by repeating this same visual motif i’m retroactively imbuing it with the narrative significance i wanted it to have. whether or not anyone is consciously picking up on it, there’s going to be a twinge of familiarity every time it’s seen that helps hammer in the character stuff i’m going for.

then similarly theres pages that are designed to interplay with each other on a less 1:1 scale, like these pages of edgeworth and mia which is just the same composition flipped upside down. They’re both supposed to get a feeling of a sort of disempowerment across, but not in the same way.

basically i guess if there’s one takeaway from all of this its to be deliberate

i know i said this is an intuitive process for me but just because that’s the case it doesn’t mean it’s an automatic one. every single element in an image is placed with intent to convey a specific feeling or lead the eye in a specific direction. if youre really thinking about what you’re doing youll get better at accomplishing what youre trying to do. theres no wrong way to do it so you just have to try and figure out what you like.

i hope any of this was helpful !

#lycheestew #quantum meruit #this is very long im sorry #i drew this

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oonajaeadira · 2 years

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Hi! I just wanted to say that you are one of my favorite authors on this site. I love the characters you write and how you build real, meaningful relationships. The way you plot your stories is amazing. You care so much about your worlds and it shows.

I use to write all the time. I would carry notebooks with me constantly, but I became discouraged with myself one day and just stopped writing. Now, I’m scared to pick it back up again. Scared that no matter how hard I try I won’t be able to capture that love again. I would love to write about Din or Javier Peña but what if I can’t do them justice? Plus, I don’t even know if I would want to share them on here with all the hate going around. It’s been over a decade I know my writing won’t be great. My question is how do you keep the passion goin? How do you keep from getting discouraged and stopping all together?

Sorry this is so long. Thank you so much for listening and thank you for your wonderful work!

Oh thank you, friend. Really. I love my little fantasy Pedro boyfriends. I just want to give them nice things. And I just wanna give myself nice Pedros.

You think your ask is long? I can beat that.

I was the same...creative writing was my best subject, my escape, my everything when I was young. My parents and teachers were all convinced I'd become a writer. I even majored in English Lit...but that was only because I needed my parents' help in college and they wouldn't support me taking a performance major! But you know what studying great literature does to your drive to write? Kills it dead. Creates constant comparison. Makes you look critically at literature and pick it apart and examine it and learn that either every author is a mad genius or they were just fumbling around and wrote something so universal that everyone can see something in it and they look like a mad genius.

Anyway. I didn't write for a long, long time.

Not until I had to, when I was helping my actors write a script and realize that I actually never lost the ability to tell stories and that's what writing really is. (I was rusty as hell at first, but it got better sooner than I'd thought.)

Then the pandemic shut theater down and my creative soul needed the outlet and here we are.

So. Your fear..."what if I can't do them justice?" I thought that too. And you might not do them justice. AND THAT'S OKAY. But you care about doing them justice so you're on the right path from the start. Follow it. The path gets clearer as you go. Caring makes all the difference. Do yourself justice first and write what you want. It's not only good practice for the technical skill, but it's good practice for making it fun. That's what you want to be your default--fun. Once you've got that, you're free to improve and challenge yourself...but you're not going to write if you're not having fun, so write whatever you want.

There are a few things I tell the artists I work with and I'll tweak it here for writing:

1. You will never ever reach perfection, but that doesn't mean you can't aim for it. If you know in your heart that perfection is unreachable, it makes your best effort that much more amazing, because there is a beauty and humanity in imperfection. The more human and truthful you are, just by nature of being imperfect, brings you closer to perfection than you could ever try to get.

2. There is no thing on earth that is universally loved. (This is actually a really fun exercise. Try to think of something. The Beatles. The Grand Canyon. Michaelangelo's David. Now to to Yelp and read the one star reviews on some of these. They're out there. I know, because I've seen them and they're hilarious.) Every time you put out a story, there will be at least one person that hates your story. And every time you put out a story, there will be one person that loves your story. That person who hates your story? They might not like the subject or the character. They might have had a fight with their boss or got a speeding ticket that day. There's a million reasons why that it might not even be your story that caused their hate. Or it might be. Not everyone can love it. But that one person that loves it? That's your audience. Write for them.

3. And even if someone loves it, bahhhhh just write for yourself. That's what I do. I learned a lot about writing here when I exposed my fic for commenting. I learned that when I stopped holding back and trying to write something that people liked, when I just said, "this is probably too much but fk it I like it" THAT's when people started connecting with my work. Because I was writing from my heart and without being self-conscious.

Don't get me wrong, I appreciate every single comment I get on my writing. I do my best to respond to every comment and every reblog because I truly truly love that people are connecting and feeling human things and are good enough to tell me. But in the end, I write the stories I want to see. I write the romances I want to have with the boys. I don't care if folks be cringing because I just write for the joy of it.

And you're right, there's a lot of hate lately, and I don't know why. It seems to me that a lot of it is just people with an urge to troll and cut others down for being too happy or having too much fun. But I've found the fandom to lean very far into the positive and supportive. That's what I love about being here. It's a big slumber party where someone will sit down and say, lemme tell you a story, and sometimes the story is brilliant or sometimes you really love the storyteller or maybe you just need one more hit of Din. Sometimes you lean on the fan next to you and you both sigh over a sentence or a gesture or a kiss or a smut. But then the story ends and we say, thank you, that was lovely, here's what I enjoyed and if you have some more, I would love to hear it.

If you are trepidatious to begin, you could always start posting over at AO3. It's less of a chatty community over there, but comments there are generally very kind.

This was very rambly and stream-of-conscious and I'm sorry. But. TLDR:

Write what you want and have fun. Write for yourself first. Don't hold back.

Aim for perfection knowing you'll never reach it. No need to strive for it, just aim and let the arrow go. Appreciate your effort.

Nothing is universally loved. But those who love your work LOVE YOUR WORK and that should hold more weight than someone having a bad day and passing their negativity onto you.

And finally "you can fix anything but a blank page." Or, as I like to say, "Why not just start and see what happens? You can always stop again, but hopefully you'll be flying so high that won't be able to."

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unfortunate-arrow · 2 years

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Let Your Heart Be Light

[My @hphmsecretsanta gift for @amerrymystery. Hope you like it! The title is a reference to Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas, by the way.]

A Modern Daywood AU

Robbie Donovan’s already handling everything that he can— family drama, recently being diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder, and taking a brand new job. He doesn’t have time for anything else, not even for the pretty woman working in the restaurant next door. Robbie just wants to figure out his life and possibly find some way to not live with his family. However, he cannot seem to stay away from the pretty woman next door, Penny Haywood.

Penny Haywood doesn’t know how she ended up being tasked with the job of saving a failing restaurant in Killybegs, Ireland. That seems to be the only way that she can advance her career and possibly be able to run her own five-star restaurant one day, though. So, Penny reluctantly agrees to take on the project. Her ambition doesn’t leave much room for other things, but for some reason the man working next door, Robbie Donovan keeps being on her mind.

As Robbie and Penny’s friendship starts veering into a decidedly non-platonic direction, obstacles appear, testing their commitments to their respective goals… and to their budding relationship. Yet, it seems that working together is the best way to solve their problems, and their friendship starts turning into something much deeper and stronger— love.

A Little Bit More - A Regency Brilias AU

Lord Elias Quintin, heir to the Clarendon earldom, doesn’t want to think about Christmas or celebrating the holidays. How can he, when he’s nearly consumed with guilt over the accident that left his little brother dead? That hasn’t stopped his parents, though, who insist on throwing a house party… despite the fact that their mourning period is not yet over. And this time, the purpose of the party is to get him married off. Elias doesn’t want a wife and he’s convinced that no woman would ever want him for a husband, even with the title that he’s set to inherit. Also, he wouldn’t even subject a rat to his family. Except that Miss Brianna McGill keeps drawing Elias’s attention away from the more acceptable choices for a bride. But dammit, if he has to marry, then Elias is going to choose a bride who actually seems to like him… and one that he may just end up falling in love with.

Miss Brianna McGill needs a husband by the end of the Yuletide season in order to inherit her grandmother’s beloved cottage. Which is the only reason she’s even at the Clarendon Christmas house party. There’s something fascinating about the Clarendon heir, Elias, though, and Brianna finds herself wanting to learn more about the young man who seems to be followed everywhere by an unseen cloud of darkness.

As their courtship moves closer to marriage, Elias’s parents begin to let their disapproval be known. This time, though, Elias isn’t going to let them ruin something good, even if it means directly disobeying them and risking his mother’s wrath.

*The title is from a quote from How The Grinch Stole Christmas: “Maybe Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.”

I Bet My Life - A Song for the Everett Brothers

I've been around the world and never in my wildest dreams Would I come running home to you I've told a million lies but now I tell a single truth There's you in everything I do

Now remember when I told you that's the last you'll see of me Remember when I broke you down to tears I know I took the path that you would never want for me I gave you hell through all the years

This song by Imagine Dragons was chosen because it has Conner & Cooper vibes, especially regarding Conner’s fate, which is something that Cooper never wanted for his brother. It’s definitely from Conner’s point of view, addressing his beloved younger brother.

Bonus One: Bernie Brennan

Bonus Two: Duncan Donovan

#hphmss21 #robbie x penny #daywood #robbie donovan #hphm #hogwarts mystery #elias quintin #brilias #brianna x elias #brianna mcgill #hphl #hogwarts legacy #conner everett #cooper everett #hpma #magic awakened #bernie holland #duncan donovan #my aesthetic #my writing #took your gift ideas for the first three & added aesthetics for bernie & duncan b/c i didn’t have the muse to really write #so i made little summaries for daywood & elias #(and included brianna because elias deserves at least thing that makes him happy)#and then decided to pick a song to go with the everett bros… and immediately thought that i bet my life fit them #and then bonus aesthetics of duncan & bernie to make it better as it doesn’t exactly fit any requirements #so i really hope you like this!#🎄#🎄 merry/happy christmas! 🎄#also the two aus are both muggle!!!#and i quite like how elias’s aesthetic came out

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stargazer-sims · 3 years

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Journal Entry #24 (part one)

Yuri

Complacency is dangerous.

I'm sorry to say, this week I've learned that lesson the hard way. More than sorry, in fact. I bitterly regret that, yet again, I failed to see something that should have been obvious because I was so wrapped up in the illusion of my perfect little life. That's my weakness. I know it now, and I know I have to change, not just for myself but for Victor, too.

The problem is, I think I'm scared of the real world. The one I've been believing in is so much better. In that one, there's always someone to take care of me, shower me with affection, protect me and shelter me from everything that's bad. But, in the real world, there’s pain and stress and complex interpersonal relationships, and no heroes who swoop in to save the day and create a happy ending. Even the strongest people are fallible. Even the ones who love us most can still hurt us. Even the ones we feel safest with can't protect us from everything.Unfortunately for me, I’ve often forgotten those truths, or chosen to overlook them because they were too hard to face.

All I’ve ever wanted is to be happy and safe. Until I met Victor, I didn’t know what happiness or safety felt like, and once I understood how good it was not to be sad and afraid all the time, I never wanted to experience anything that challenged or scared me ever again. I was sure I’d found a willing protector in Victor, and I’d selfishly placed all the burden of responsibility for my happiness and safety on him, and took very little on myself. Worse, I don’t think I’ve ever taken nearly enough responsibility for his happiness, much less my own.

That position is unsustainable, and I wish I would’ve figured it out sooner.

If I could rewind time and go back to last Wednesday morning, I would, and I’d make different choices. The first thing I would do on the second pass would be to insist that Victor call in sick from work. We might’ve avoided a lot of trouble if he’d stayed home. I might not have learned anything in that case, but at least no one would’ve gotten hurt.

Victor hadn't been feeling well when he woke up on Wednesday morning. I may actually have realized he was getting sick before he did, because he was coughing through the night and it woke me up. As I was trying to get back to sleep, I noticed his breathing sounded different than normal, too. Most people might not even pay attention to that, but I'm ill so often myself that I think I've developed some sort of hyper-vigilance for signs of illness in others.

Anyway, I'd actually expected him to stay home from work on Wednesday. To my surprise, he didn't. He did stay home on Thursday and Friday, though, and as much as I dislike not being close to him, we mostly avoided each other in the hope that it’d lessen my chances of catching his cold. Maybe that’s something I’d want us to do differently if given a second chance as well.

On Saturday morning, I answered my phone to a woman who introduced herself as Tomiko and said she's Victor's boss. The fitness center is open seven days a week, but Victor only works from Tuesday to Friday, so I was a caught little off guard by the call. I don't know why, but for some reason, I'd assumed he and his supervisor would work the same shift.

"I tried calling Victor's phone, but he isn't answering," Tomiko said. "This number was listed as his emergency contact."

"Yes," I said. "I'm Yuri, his spouse."

I confess, I liked saying that. It required less explanation than ‘soulmate’ and seemed to carry more power, too. We’ll always be soulmates, but in certain circumstances, following the path of least resistance is what’s called for.

"Well, I guess you're best placed to know when he intends to come back to work," Tomiko said. "That's what I'm calling about."

"I'll have to get him to call you," I told her. "Honestly, I'm not sure when he'll be ready either. Hopefully by Tuesday, though.”

Tomiko and I chatted for a couple of minutes, and she gave me some instructions to pass along to Victor.

“I hope he gets well soon,” she said. “Everyone at the center misses him.”

“I’ll let him know,” I said. We exchanged goodbyes, and hung up.

After getting off the phone with Tomiko, I went to Victor's room to check on him. I hadn’t been in his room more than twice since Wednesday evening. It felt a little weird, simply walking in, even though that’s what we both typically do with each other’s rooms. As I crossed the threshold, I wondered if I should have knocked.

The first thing I noticed was that he had his normal colour back, not pale like he’d been on Wednesday, and not flushed with fever like he’d been overnight on Thursday.

His eyes were closed, but I could tell he wasn’t asleep. I knelt beside the bed, and touched his arm. "Hey," I said. "It's almost ten o'clock."

It took him a second to acknowledge me, but finally he said, "Okay."

"You're looking much better," I said. "How are you feeling?"

He made a sound that was like the vocal equivalent of a shrug. "I don't know."

"Do you feel like getting up?"

“No,” he said.

“Do you want some tea, or something to eat?”

“No.”

"Your boss called," I told him.

"Uh-huh."

"She wants to know if you're still sick. She says if you're not going to be back by the time your shift starts on Tuesday, you'll need a doctor's note."

"Okay."

"So, do you want me to take you to the doctor, or do you think you'll be better after the weekend?"

"I'm not going to the stupid doctor," he said testily. "I probably won't be better, but if my boss wants me at work on Tuesday, I'll be there."

"If you're not better, she's not expecting you back," I said. I reached out to caress his cheek. "It’s okay. I can take you to the clinic. It'll be—"

He nudged my hand away from his face. "Yuri, I said I'm not going to the doctor," he snapped. "How many times do I have to say it?"

His tone was like a slap. Victor had never spoken to me like that before, and the shock and hurt I felt seemed almost physical. I was willing to accept a little irritability, considering that he wasn't feeling well, but I was not at all prepared for such an irrationally angry reaction over my simple suggestion of going to the medical clinic for a quick examination and a doctor's note.

"I... I'm sorry. I heard you the first time," I said, my voice small and shaking. "But, I'm worried. If you're really that sick, I think you should see a doctor."

"Can you just leave me alone, please? Stop harassing me about it, okay?"

"I'm not trying to harass you," I said. "I only want to be sure you're all right. You've barely been out of your room for the past three days, and you haven't been eating, have you?"

"It doesn't matter."

"Yes, it does. If anyone should know that, it's you."

"Yeah, I know, but maybe I don't care."

"Why?" I asked.

"I don't want to talk about it," he said. “Can you please just do as I asked, and leave me alone?”

“Fine,” I said, trying to force down my own sudden spark of anger. “You can have the whole house to yourself. I have to do the grocery shopping and go to the post office anyway. Then, I might see if Taka and Seiji want to do something. I can be gone all day, if that’d suit you.”

I got up and started to turn away, but Victor caught me by the wrist. “Yuri, wait.”

“Let go of me,” I said.

“You can’t go out.” Instead of letting me go, he tightened his fingers around my arm. “Stay here.”

I tugged against his grip. “Victor, let go!"

“You can’t go out by yourself,” he said. “Please.”

“Make up your mind!” I exclaimed. With a backward lurch, I succeeded in freeing my wrist. Unluckily, inertia continued to propel me, and with nothing holding me in place any more, I stumbled and landed on my backside on the floor.

For a second, it was as if time stopped. The look on Victor’s face was one of absolute horror, as if something from his nightmares had become real. As for me, I gave up trying to maintain any semblance of emotional control.

“Yuri, I…” Victor began, but didn’t seem capable of getting beyond that.

“What do you want?” I shouted at him. “Do you want me to leave you alone, or do you want me to stay here? Tell me, or I’m making my own decision, and it’s not going to be to stay in this house with you!”

Victor stared at me, and not unpredictably, I saw tears starting to leak from the edges of his eyes. I shouldn’t have been surprised. He cries over everything.

He climbed off the bed and started to move toward me. “Yuri, I’m sorry. I… I didn’t mean… Are you hurt? Can you get up?”

“You’re supposed to protect me,” I said. “You promised.”

“I know,” he said, his voice already strained and diminished by his tears. “That’s what I was trying to do.”

“What?”

“I want you to be safe,” he said. “But… I don’t know how to protect you. Not this time.”

“This time? What are you talking about?”

He moved closer, “Come here,” he said, holding his hands out. “Let me see if you’re okay.”

Let me see if you’re okay.

Something about that phrase made my chest constrict in instant fear.

My mind flashed back to a moment over five years ago, when someone else had hurt me and had said those same words, exactly like that.

One of Ren's favourite things to do was to trap me in the corner of a room, or against a wall, a door, or the refrigerator; any place he could hold me with only one arm and prevent me from moving. He'd use the other hand for... exploring.

This one time, Ren had pinned me on the wall in his bedroom. He'd held me there with one hand pressed into my collarbone, while he tried to unbutton my shirt with the other. When I'd struggled a bit too hard, he let go of my shirt and used both hands to push me into the position he wanted. He shoved forcefully enough that the back of my head struck the wall. I'd cried out, and he let go of me, and I'd slipped right through his grasp and ended up sitting on the floor.

I'm sure he hadn't meant to hurt me like that, and I think, for a fraction of a second, he'd been scared. He'd knelt down in front of me. Let me see if you're okay.

"Don't touch me," I said, just as I'd said to Ren on that day five years ago.

Victor stretched his hand out toward me, not touching, but looking like he wanted to. He said, "Yuri, I didn't mean to—“

"Don't touch me!" This time, I yelled it so loudly my voice cracked.

Victor's face went white, and he snatched his hand back, clutching it to his chest. 'Dismayed' would not have been a strong enough word to describe his expression. I saw in his face the precise moment that something inside him shattered. He inched away from me, as if now he was the one who was afraid.

Of course, I'm remembering all this in hindsight. I was experiencing it then, but I wasn't processing it. I'm sure I was operating on pure reflex in that moment.

As soon as I judged the distance between us to be enough, I scrambled to my feet and dashed out of the room. I didn't stop until I was shut securely behind the door of my own bedroom.

Across the hall, only slightly muffled by the closed doors, I could hear Victor sobbing; huge, noisy, anguished sobs that would normally tear at my heart and have me rushing to comfort him. But, this time, I told myself I didn't care. I was angry and scared, and it was his fault. He could console himself.

I didn't cry. I lay on my bed and stared up at the ceiling, my mind racing frantically to interpret what had just taken place.

Calm down, Yuri, said the rational part of my brain. You have to calm down. You need to think logically and then decide what to do.

My instinct was to run, as far and as fast as I could, but the rational part quietly questioned whether that was necessary. It said running would be an overreaction. I felt as if my instinct was shrieking at my rational mind to shut up, that running would be the only way I'd be safe, but eventually the thinking part won over the feeling part.

For a long time, I lay still, breathing deeply in the way Victor had taught me. Fifteen-second breathing, he calls it. Breathe in slowly through the nose for a count of five, hold for three, and exhale through the mouth while silently counting to seven. The technique is meant to help manage pain, but I've found that it helps me settle just as effectively when I'm feeling anxious or frightened

After several repetitions, the haze of fear and anger in my brain had cleared. I still wasn’t completely calm, but at least I was once again capable of thinking straight.

I raised my arm to inspect my wrist, and found myself gazing at my beautiful snowflake bracelet. It was undamaged, and when I carefully slid it higher on my arm, I saw there wasn't even a mark on my skin beneath it. There were no marks on my wrist at all. I took a moment to mentally assess the rest of my body. Other than a growing ache in my stomach, nothing hurt. I was fine.

I lowered my hands and covered my face, feeling completely foolish.

Victor wasn't trying to hurt me, hadn't harmed me in the least, in fact. The truth was, I'd been utterly terrified by the prospect of being restrained, and I panicked. That, and I was upset and confused by Victor’s inexplicably hostile behaviour and had somehow read my own meaning into it.

I thought I’d managed to purge my mind of all the fear, pain and anger I’d lived with when Ren and I were together. I’d convinced myself that Victor’s gentleness and unconditional love for me had healed me somehow, and that my wounds had disappeared. Of course, that was a convenient lie. I let myself be lulled into a belief that, logically, couldn't possibly have made sense if I'd had the will to think about it.

My scars weren’t gone. I’d only been ignoring them. In a world where I was sheltered and spoiled and adored by my loving, gentle protector, setting aside thoughts of my past trauma became easier, and instead of getting the help I probably should’ve gotten, I chose to tell myself everything was all right.

But, everything was not all right.

Up to this point, I’ve been fortunate. I’ve never had any reason to fear Victor, and nothing he’s done has ever triggered a memory like the one I’d just relived. Victor and I frequently disagree, but he’s never raised his voice to me or acted aggressively in any way.

I wanted to believe he wasn’t capable of it, but now I realize, he’s as susceptible to emotional outbursts as anyone else. He isn't immune to mistakes; he’s human just like me. Stupidly allowing myself to accept the fantasy I'd created about my perfect hero led me to a point where I not only felt hurt and betrayed when the slightest thing went wrong, but where my complete overreaction to that imaginary betrayal had likely done very real harm to Victor.

With that revelation, the last of my anger dissipated. In its place, I was flooded with shame. How could I have been so selfish and careless?

I'd accused him of not keeping his promise to protect me, but what had I done to protect him? What had I even done to acknowledge he needed protecting? I'd realized on Wednesday that something other than a cold was troubling him, but I hadn't pursued it. I hadn't tried particularly hard to find out what the problem was or offered to help him fix it, and the situation had evidently grown to a breaking point.

I’ll admit, I didn’t know what to do next. I didn't think Victor would want to talk so soon after what had happened between us, but still, I at least wanted to say I was sorry. And I wanted to be near him, even if that meant I had to sit in a corner of the room while he gave me the cold shoulder.

Slowly, I dragged myself off my bed and made my way across the hall. I knocked lightly on his door.

“Victor?” I called out. “Can I come in?”

He didn't respond, which I guess I should’ve expected. What I didn’t expect was to discover the door was locked when I attempted to open it.

I tried again. "Victor?"

Several seconds passed, and then came his quiet reply. "Stay away from me." It sounded as if he was right next to the door.

"Can you open the door, please? I want to see you."

“You didn’t want to see me before. Why would you want to see me now?”

Because I love you. Because I was wrong. Because I'm sorry.

Those are the things I should have said. What I actually said was, "Please, don't be like that."

"Like what? Like somebody who's upset because he always tries his hardest and still isn't enough? I don't want to see you right now, okay? I don't feel like doing whatever you expect me to do to make you feel better. I'm tired of trying."

"Victor—“

"I’m not opening the door. Go away."

"I'm sorry," I said, but it was evidently too late in the conversation for that, because my words were met with nothing but silence.

I slid down the wall and curled up on the floor, asking myself desperately how everything had spun so far out of control.

#ts4 #sims 4 #eagames #snowy escape #victorandyuri #stargazersims #victorsworldadventures

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resinatingbeauty · 3 years

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Witchcraft & Expectations

What do you really expect from the Craft?

I had considered writing this for a while before actually doing it just because I didn't want anyone to feel like they were being attacked or singled out. Offending you isn't the purpose of this post, so please do not be discouraged by anything you read here. There is no wrong way of practicing your Craft and to each their own. I was just curious about perspectives when it comes to your expectations regarding Witchcraft, magick, and spirituality as I have dealt with many different people following many different paths since focusing more on my Craft and art through my shop which began on Mercari and grew enough to become more established on Etsy.

I do sell many spiritual / witchy items from personalized spell kits to witchy mystery boxes compiled with Intuitively chosen and my own handmade, one of a kind items. Among the most popular spiritual offerings are my 'buy one get one miniature spell jars,' which allow my customers to select two general purposes or a personalized request from which I assemble and enchant a miniature glass spell jar containing herbs, crystals, essential oils, and other objects based on their needs and requests. I wanted to make these little portable vessel talismans more available to everyone price and purpose wise, compared to others that have been charged with a more specific intent or devoted to a specific deity.

I have a long history of using spell jars myself for various purposes whenever I feel compelled to create one or a special occasion arises. I'm picky about larger jars and bottles, however, so they are usually created in small corked jars or in larger jars that I will sometimes embellish or try new things to integrate that allow the spell jar to also be an appealing or intriguing piece of handmade everyday decor while serving its spiritual purpose, such as the one in the photo above.

For the most part, I have found a surprisingly amount of success with my spell jars. Not just myself, but others as well have reported events that they thought were directly related to their spell jar. I had created one for my neighbor a couple weeks ago who had been searching for a better job than the one she had at a preschool. The day after I gave her the jar, she received a text from an old coworker who notified her that a position at a bank she had applied at months ago that had nothing available at that time had just opened up.

This actually exceeded my expectations. In my experience, magick takes time. Others who have commented on the success of their spell jars or magick in general would contact me a few weeks or so after using their spell kit or receiving their spell jar. I created a spell jar back in January to help jumpstart my small business selling my crafts and Craft and didn't really start to see a huge change until mid-March-April where I was more successful than even I anticipated.

This was about on par with what I expected in terms of time, as most spells I've ever done have taken days, weeks, or even months to start manifesting results that couldn't be passed off or ignored. To be sure, I include a scroll with each of my kits and jars explaining how they are best utilized, to have patience, how to set a purpose and intentions, the power of thinking positively, and that magick rewards those who are willing to work and make sacrifices for what they desire. To me, all of these things are virtues that this path teaches us and are part of what makes the Craft so empowering overall. Whether it was the spell or your hard work, you are the catalyst for change. You made things happen. I mean, what is more empowering than that?

This is part of the reason why I personally chose to over spell kits and magickal tools rather than offering to cast spells or perform rituals on one's behalf. It was my desire to make YOU feel empowered and you are the one ultimately responsible for your own success or failure, whether spiritually or otherwise. I'll gladly steer you down the road of success and provide you with my knowledge, experience, and guidance, but I am always clear about what to expect.

Unfortunately, we live in a time where instant gratification is anticipated and expected, which I never considered in terms of Witchcraft. I knew that no matter how many times I write 'set realistic expectations, focus on your purpose, be patient, and keep doing what your doing' that some people would just blow through all that hoping that they just bought a quick fix for all their problems for $6.99 + a buy one get one deal.

Two weeks or so ago, I had received an order for said jars from a young man who simply said he wanted a personalized spell jar for lucid dreaming and dream work and selected his second 'free' one for self empowerment. I reached out to clarify and answered some of his questions. My immediate impression from him was one of discord. He expressed a lot of turmoil in his life over the past few months and claimed to have taken on a lot of responsibility. He seemed young and eager, with a ton of questions regarding magick in general. I answered his questions the best I could, but reiterated the same values I expressed in the previous paragraph when asked why such and such spell wasn't working, 'should I not have done this,' etc. Magick takes time to manifest, especially when it comes to financial purposes like he explained which are inherently unlikely to resolve themselves overnight.

He seemed happy enough with his purchase and said as much when he received his package. A couple days later, I received a notification about a review he had left which was negative, saying one of his spell jars didn't work with a message delivered in tandem asking what purpose I had set for his spell jar.

Let me say this: I am not upset with him or complaining about his review. He is entitled to his own opinion, although I was annoyed with how quickly he had come to the conclusion when in the instructions I provided him I specifically said that these things take time to work. Anyone who receives results instantly or within the next day or so are exceeding my own expectations. Which is great! Hooray!

But this is definitely not the standard I've come to expect in all the years I've been practicing the Craft.

I continued chatting with and answering this young man's questions and ultimately uncovered that he was upset about a variety of things that had been going on in his life. In his mind, he felt entitled to have these things work for him sooner rather than later and was frustrated and angry that nothing he tried had been working out the way he expected.

In the time that I have opened my little shop, I have (thankfully) only run into one other person like this- where their understanding of Witchcraft seems to have been compiled from television and movies. After the first, I learned to tread lightly around these individuals because, whether it's their fault or not, they have been mislead.

Television shows like old school Charmed and the newer Salem and Witches of East End are really entertaining. I enjoyed watching them, but they are the absolute enemy of those who practice magick / witchcraft as a form of religion or spirituality. Sure, some of these shows actually do their research. Even Buffy the Vampire Slayer was ahead of its time introducing Wiccans, Technopagans, and New Age practices to pop culture and in many ways helped to show people an obscured version of the truth during the 'Satanic Panic' period when even witches hated being called witches and the pentagram / pentacle difference became an actual difference that wasn't just a choice of words.

Newer generations growing up with Harry Potter, which is hardly a great introduction into magickal traditions, were at least more open minded than the previous generation to the actuality of witchcraft and magick as a spiritual practice.

I mean, who doesn't want to snap their fingers and make the house tidy in one fell swoop?

I sure do. But even when I first started practicing at 11 I understood that that just isn't how it is.

This young man who was saying he lead a coven sounded more like he was LARPing than legitimately asking for spiritual guidance. I realized real quick that I couldn't do anything for him. What he wanted and expected, no matter how many times I referenced the instructions I provided (he evidently hadn't acknowledged) and relayed to him my own experience and expectations, he was looking for that 'quick fix' and someone or something to blame for when it didn't work the way he thought it would. The main reason for his complaint? The night after he received his spell jar, he said he just dreamnt about the moon.

My understanding of lucid dreaming was having direct control over ones dreams. The more I talked to this person the more it became clear that this wasn't his understanding of lucid dreaming. I tried to ask what he had tried to gain that control, as many of you know that I suffered from sleep paralysis for years and taught myself how to realize and 'break out' of it over time. He referenced making offerings to a goddess. I had to stop.

I'm sure that another business minded witch would have sold him something else or offered an exchange. I (stupidly) tried to make him understand that he has the power to manifest his desires. All I did was provide him with a tool to help things along.

This was the same for the woman I had dealt with months ago who said that she had been told by this coven owned business that she was a vampire reincarnated to be with her lover. That was the ultimate end of our conversation because she didn't seem very open to anything I suggested. Whether the things she bought were 'effective' for her or not we will never know. When she started messaging me to the point of harassment I deleted her messages and flagged them as spam. All this time and effort spent consoling someone who really isn't in the right frame of mind for magick or witchcraft.

The main point in writing this ranty post is to get the perspective of the community. What are your expectations for your own spells? What do you tell others when they ask? If you are also a 'witch shop' owner or own your own spiritual practice how do you deal with clients that have set unrealistic expectations for you and your Craft?

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