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#I'll be an active listener who doesn't judge you
violetrainbow412-blog · 5 months
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Day 26: drunken confession
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Masterlist flufftober 🎀
Another one a little long that I love. I hope you like it :)
"Hey, look who's coming over there!"
Morgan's cheerful voice forced Spencer to look up from the bar and it was then that you could see that Derek hadn't lied when he called you: he seriously was hopelessly drunk.
"Y/N!" he shouted, slurring his words and grinning from ear to ear as he opened his arms to fling himself in your direction. Luckily you closed the distance to grab him to keep him from falling off the wooden bench he was on "How did you know I wanted to see you?"
You heard Morgan let out a chuckle at this, as if he hadn't had to listen to his incessant pleas for him to call you, since Spencer was pretty clear that only under those conditions would he return home.
"Oh, I can read your mind, didn't you know that?" you joked and he, whose reality was completely altered, widened his eyes in astonishment as if he genuinely believed your words.
"I'm sorry for upsetting you, it's just that he can be very stubborn at times" Morgan apologized.
You two knew each other because of your common friendship with Spencer and on more than one occasion members of the unit had included you in their activities, so there was a degree of trust.
"Why did he get drunk, anyway?" you muttered, with the man still in your arms and his head buried firmly in your neck "I mean, he... you know, he doesn't do it because of his streak of sobriety”
"I honestly don't know. He just asked me to join him here and he ordered one cocktail and then another and well, he ended up like this."
That didn't sound like Spencer, for you knew that if there was one thing the man had, it was strong willpower to stay free of anything that would alter his body chemistry. You were suddenly worried that something had happened and he hadn't told you, although judging by the state he was in it wasn't the most appropriate time to find out. Still, you could try later.
"I'm tired, I want to go home" he complained, rubbing his nose against the skin of your bare shoulder. You didn't think Spencer would get so clingy under the effects of alcohol, because of that whole germ thing, so you were slightly surprised to feel how he was holding you so tightly.
"Do you want me to help you carry him?" asked Morgan and after your friend got off the bench you looked at him for a second, checking that with a little of your help he could still stand to walk to your car.
"Don't worry. Everything under control”
"Are you sure?"
"One hundred percent”
"Well, in that case I'll see you later. Bye kiddo, be sure to call me when you're home."
"Bye, Morgan!" he hiccupped cheerfully, waving goodbye to his friend and getting a pat on the shoulder.
You two stumbled to the parking lot, but with enough luck you made it to your car in one piece and once there you were able to throw him into the passenger seat, making sure to buckle him in before starting.
Once you started the engine, you asked your friend if he was ready for you to leave, and since Spencer's entire body was turned in your direction, it wasn't hard to notice his nod to your question.
You waited until you were a couple of blocks ahead before finally speaking, though you knew full well that he would answer truthfully to whatever you were going to ask him.
"Hey, Spencer”
"Yeah?"
"I'm not mad at you, but... Can I know why you drank?"
Out of the corner of your eye you saw him take a moment to ponder what had really been the reason for all that, and you waited patiently, until he finally got up the nerve to say something.
"I was sad”
"Sad?" 
"And I felt lonely" he completed. The red light allowed you to turn and look at him, and then you met his big, beautiful, melancholic honey-colored eyes. 
"You could have just called me"
“But you knew I needed to see you, right? Why didn’t you ever tell me you could read minds?”
You laughed at his innocence and just shook your head, incredulous to see how a genius had fallen to that level just for a couple of drinks. But you were still worried about what kind of emotional problem your friend was now afflicting and why he hadn't had the confidence to tell you, because after all you were supposed to tell each other everything and support each other. It had always been like this.
You wanted to ask him something else, but you noticed that Spencer's eyes had already closed suddenly, so you thought it would be best to wake him up until you were finally home.
“Reid,” you called softly, once you parked outside the building and unbuckled his seatbelt. He seemed oblivious to everything and for a second you feared you would have to leave him sleeping there until the next morning “Come on. Up"
As best you could, you managed to put his arm around your shoulders and half carry him to the entrance, making sure there were no gossiping eyes when you struggled to open the front door. You thought the staircase would be the most difficult, but fortunately he acquired a certain lucidity that lightened your load after the first step.
“Hi,” he greeted you, speaking too close to your face and smiling from ear to ear, as if he had just noticed your presence.
“Hello, hot stuff” you replied amused and your friend's cheeks blushed violently at your compliment, staying that way until you managed to reach the door with the number 23.
Once inside you managed to lead him to the small bed where he slept and then you let out a sigh of relief; he watched you from where you stood, still with that dizzy expression.
“It was difficult, but we're finally here, huh?”
“I have already been thinking about it very seriously. And I don't think you can read my mind," he said, sounding quite convinced “I mean, although there has been evidence that it's still not scientifically possible, you would need... you would need a lot of things that right now I don't know what they are, but that I know you don't have”
You giggled and then knelt next to the mattress to be closer to him, stretching one of your hands enough to brush his hair away from his forehead. Spencer smiled at your touch.
“You got me, I can't read your mind. Because if that were the case, I would walk in there right now…” with the tip of your finger you gently touched his forehead, bringing a smile to him “to find out what is making you so sad”
“Even if you wanted to, you couldn't. I'm not thinking about that.”
"No? And then what do you think about?” you asked gently.
Your smile was calm and you were very close to him, admiring with amusement the signs of drunkenness that were still in him. Spencer, as much as the situation allowed, was also watching you, although this time there was something different about him. While your friend looked at you fondly every time, now he seemed completely enthralled with you.
“It's not about that”
“Does it have anything to do with your mom?” 
“No, she's fine.”
"And then?" you insisted. He just kept watching you “Come on, what is that wonderful mind thinking?”
It took Spencer a second to respond.
"You"
"Me?" You murmured in a light voice. “And why do you think about me?”
You wanted to know what it was about, however, nothing could have prepared you for the response you were going to receive.
“I'm thinking about how pretty you are. And how much I want to kiss you right now”
You unconsciously leaned back, and to say you were surprised was an understatement, because you were completely taken aback. Although you had clearly heard every word drawn from his tongue, your mind was wondering if he had seriously confessed that he wanted to kiss you.
“Huh… what…?”
“I think about how much I want to kiss you all the time, actually. Every time I see you, and smell your perfume, and I see your smile, and you touch me... it's like you drive me completely crazy”
“Y-You don't know what you're saying,” you stammered, feeling those words unreal. “You're very drunk.” 
"It's true, but even if I am, I know well what I feel. And I know that I am so in love with you. As you can't imagine."
Even though he was drunk he sounded totally sure of what he was saying and he couldn't do anything but terrify you. Spencer wasn't supposed to be in love with you, you didn't even believe he was capable of harboring feelings of that nature for you. If you were honest, you didn't feel scared by what he was saying, but what worried you most was that you didn't know how to feel about it.
You were barely deciding what would be the right answer when he beat you to it:
“Why did you have to go out with that boy?”
"Sorry?"
“The one from your social network”
Your mind had to recalibrate so you could now focus on what he was referring to and understand that he was probably talking about your last date. You had met this guy online that you had liked and with whom you had made a date last week, just to be able to distract yourself a little from the routine of your work and, with a bit of luck, maybe think of a candidate for the future. 
It was obvious that you had told your friend and although you thought he was happy for you, you now knew that, surely, that wasn’t the case.
“Are you angry about that?”
"I'm sad!" he corrected you. The thought of him breaking his streak for you made you feel nauseous and if you could you would have told him it was a totally stupid reason "You're my friend and you're so pretty and you're going to date an idiot that I'm not”
“You're not an idiot.”
“But you don't want to date me either”
You were quiet for a moment, your brain practically burning to find the right words. You were afraid that one bad answer would hurt your friend or that another would give him false hope, because you didn't even know if you felt the same way about him to begin with. The confession had caught you so off guard that you needed time. Just a few hours, or maybe a day, to put in order the whirlwind of emotions that danced inside you so that you can offer a verdict.
Besides, Spencer was madly drunk, how could you trust the words of someone who was intoxicated?
“We'll talk about this tomorrow, okay?” you said at last, reaching out to caress his cheek as if you could offer some sort of comfort. “You're not up to it right now”
“Maybe you're not even real,” he mused, lost in whatever was on his mind “I'm just dreaming about you again.”
“Oh, I assure you, I'm very real,” you huffed, feeling the suffocating weight of the entire situation settle on your chest. “I just don't want to rush things. I need time and you need sleep”
"You love me?"
That wasn't a question, it was a plea. And it was breaking your heart not to be able to answer something to those crystallized eyes that were looking for some positive sign in your own cloudy gaze. 
“Spencer, I… Why don’t we discuss it tomorrow?”
“I just want to know if you love me,” he insisted. One of his hands shakily rose to your chest and planted himself there firmly, the tips of his fingers reaching your shoulder.
"Of course I love you. I love you a lot"
"But you love me?" 
You just wanted to hug him and maybe give him that kiss he wanted so much, but your mind kept screaming at you that you would be taking advantage of your drunk friend and that you couldn't know if that would be something you would regret.
You took a deep breath to maintain your composure and with the hand that had previously been on his cheek you took charge of holding his hand, still at the level of your heart.
“I will answer you tomorrow, when you can understand the answer, okay? I promise you"
Spencer smiled, defeated, and finally nodded his head. From his perspective there was no longer any hope, your response to what he felt was negative. 
“Can you at least stay with me until I fall asleep?”
"Yes, yes, of course. I'll stay as long as you want, honey”
“I like it when you call me that,” he murmured tenderly and quietly, as if he were afraid of saying the wrong thing. But when you smiled at him that worry dissipated.
“I'll make sure to remember it.”
You stayed in silence for a while, which was only broken when you asked him if he wanted you to turn off the light. He said no and then you stayed where you were, still holding his hand.
It took you a bit to convince him that to sleep he had to close his eyes, because he refused to stop looking at you. After a few minutes of him doing it, you began to see the first signs that he was falling into the realm of dreams.
“Y/N” he called to you, just when he was between the limbo of consciousness and unconsciousness.
"Yeah?"
“I hope tomorrow you love me”
You stayed with him until you checked that he was sound asleep, as you had promised, and then you returned home. You didn't even sleep that night, tossing and turning in bed for hours while your brain racked to understand what your heart was feeling.
And at least one thing was certain, that, the next morning, when you returned to Spencer's apartment with breakfast in one hand and his favorite coffee in the other, you already had an answer.
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taglist: @navs-bhat @reidwritings @tricia-shifting14 @spencerslove @vivian-555 @r-3dlips @rhiannonhippiegirl @taygrls @simp4f1 @sdddoobydoobydoo @taintedstranger @missabsey
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sizzlingchaosprince · 21 days
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The Toy's favorite Child
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Notes: This is the first time I'm doing such thing so I'm really nervous XD I didn't know what to put into the background of the drawing so I didn't put any. Maybe I'll edit it soon. Do forgive me for my shading, I'm still learning(trying to)
Synopsis: After starting to live in PlayCare, one creature you became friends with grew a liking to you...
Warning: PLATONIC, headcanon + little story, reader is 12-14 years old, reader is a chill teenager
It's been a year since you got into the PlayCare, passing through the security with laid-back face and leaving the staff confused. They kept you because you seemed useful for them...
You were quite chilly and relaxed, reserved and smart. Also, because of your personality you were almost the same with Cat Nap from cartoons. Maybe that's why you became quick friends with Smiling Critters. With most of them, at least...
The big purple cat was almost never appearing like others from his party. And this interested you.
After a week or so you finally met him face-to-face. You were as calm as always, but your heart was pounding from excitement. You said 'hi' for politeness and introduced yourself, waiting for him to do the same.
Guess what? His face didn't even shift. He continued staring at you with his dead eyes.
After understanding that you won't get an answer from him, you tried to talk about something else.
But he disappeared in blink of an eye.
You were quite disappointed, but you still had the same urge to get to know the living toy better. You knew it'll be a long while...
It was worth 3 months to make him sit and listen to your rambling for 10 minutes. It was worth more months to make him spend at least an hour with you. It took even longer for him to let you stay near him and sleep, leaning onto the puppet. But it was worth the pleasure you get from his warmth and company.
Even though you never heard him talk, it's enough for you to be near him. It's good to talk about any nonsense which randomly comes to your mind and have a listener who won't judge you. It's also good to take a great nap in his fur or stay in complete silence, thinking of your own thing.
The staff, of course, sooner found out the relationship between you and the purple cat puppet.
They tried to use you to their own benefits and new information, but instead you composed some lies which sounded like truth to tell them(Cat Nap helped you a little sometimes, nodding or shaking his head if the lie sounds truthful or not).
When the scientists were starting thinking about taking you for the test next, Cat Nap started to monitor you to make sure you won't end up in the Game Station.
It definitely wasn't him who knocked out the staff members right behind your back. It definitely wasn't him who let out some scratching noises in Home-Sweet-Home. Also, of course, it definitely wasn't his sharp gaze you felt on your gut 24/7.
You liked to use the hair brush on the purple furball. It doesn't move away so you can say that he's at least neutral to your activity(we don't talk about his really quiet purring).
[Now. The small story]
It was a normal day like any other one. More specifically, night. However, this week was quiet strange: the staff members of Playtime Co. except the workers from the PlayCare appeared more often in front of you. When they started talking about 'test', they randomly passed out because of the red smoke. You knew it was one of the Smiling Critters you were hanging out with for a while, but you didn't know why was he doing it.
You were currently sitting with your back leaning against the living cat plush, brushing your companion's tail you gently patted with your free second hand. The only thing that bothered you in that peaceful time was the fact that the purple cat wasn't purring at all. It was staring at you with its dark eyes. Sooner after, you finally asked him about this:
— Is something wrong, Cat Nap?
It didn't answer. Instead, the living toy just stared at you with expressionless eyes, not moving an inch. You weren't intimidated by the stare at all, so you just continued brushing the long tail. You weren't hoping for an answer anyway, but still a small, almost impossible dream was remaining in your heart.
The silence was broken by the raspy, low voice coming out from Cat Nap's voice box.
— The Prototype... Will Save Us.
You flinched.
Wow...
This is the first time he ever said something to you. It was surely a progress for your friendship.
You stared at him with wide eyes for a moment before shifting your attention back to the tail. You shrugged with your shoulders, your face had a relaxed smile.
— I don't know who the Prototype is, but if they helped you somehow, I think they're my saviour too. You're like a home to me.. I can't even imagine what would it be like living without you here!
You chuckled, patting the fluffy tail while Cat Nap looked at you with the same stare. However, something in his eyes changed... Maybe his gaze gained a little more... softness?
He stared at you until you fell asleep on him again. A few minutes of him sinking into his thoughts have passed, the toy putted his head on his paws, wrapping his tail around you like a blanket and soon enough closing his eyes. You would call it the same night-time scenario with Cat Nap in the next morning, because you didn't know that he was comfortably purring, nuzzling himself into your warmth last night...
Notes: OH MY GOD I DID IT :D I'll maybe do part 2, but without promises
Anyways, thank you for wasting your time reading my first-ever-made English fanfic. Do write me some comments about my errors if you find any, I will appreciate it since it'll improve my writing skills.
Have a nice day/evening/night!😘
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cannellee · 5 months
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hey, pls cant you do Mikey, Izana, hanma, kakucho and koko (manila arc) with a s/n temperamental, impulsive, umpredictable Dear who as bipolarity and 0 empathy, insensitive with mbti intj? Bean years younger than them, like a teenager. Thanks!
TOKYO REVENGERS OMEGAVERSE ★
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alpha! Tokyo revengers x omega! Reader (pairing: mikey, izana, hanma, kakucho, kokonoi)
— their reactions to an unstable s/o
(that's a lot! I'm not very familiar with any of these - forgive me if it's not really representative - and I'm not sure if I quite wrote the reader you had in mind. I hope you still like it!!🫶🏼 I just realized i forgot kokonoi, I'll probably do it later if I'mmotivated sorry)
my masterlist : ☆
══════════ ⋆★⋆ ══════════
KAKUCHO
he is very attentive of every single details about you and completely supports you no matter what.
he always has the right words when you're feeling down and respects your boundaries.
he often hesitates to leave you some alone time or to actually listen to his instincts and stay by your side.
he's aware you value moments of calm and peace and doesn't want to interfere and stress you out.
he's so delicate with you and always there during your episodes. he started to take note of your triggers and symptoms early in the relationship to make sure he could offer you the best support.
if you have to take treatments or medications, he has it all planned, he knows exactly when you need to take them and make sure you do. he doesn't want to risk your health!
he's so patient with you:( when you get irritable easily he gives you time and space and silently envelopes you with his calming pheromones. and when your thoughts are racing and you're not able to talk clearly, he's making you slow down, he doesn't mind if you repeat yourself and stutter over your words : he's actively listening and nodding along to whatever you say.
MIKEY
mikey tries his best to be understanding but honestly he sometimes crosses the line.
he knows you have a short temper and gets angry easily, especially when you're tired. most of the time, he'll try to appear calmer to make up for your restlessness, but there are times where he'll purposely get on your nerves.
angry, you end up saying something hurtful to him to make him shut up and go inside your nest to get some rest. he's kinda used to you cursing at him so he doesn't really take it to heart. it kinda amuses him if you ask, he just thinks you're really cute. his adorable omega getting all worked up everytime he messes up with her is truly a sight to see for him.
he's very careful with you though, and that's something people don't usually notice. you tend to do things out of the blue without a second thought and that scares mikey. it's most of the time harmless stuff, but he can't help but worry and think of the worst.
he tries his best to make sure you feel at home and comfortable with him. he doesn't judge you or anything. if you don't want to do anything at all and rest all day, that's fine with him, he'll even help you build your nest!
the only thing he wants from you is to stay loyal to him and never leave him or for you to hurt yourself. he values your health, probably more than you and accepts any of your mood swings with teasing remarks and comforting hugs.
IZANA
he's so whipped he absolutely doesn't care about anything you can do or say to him.
you can suck the money out of his wallet and not even thank him and he'll accept it. you often demand things from him, order him around when you need to do your nest but you're too tired to do so, make him buy you the finest jewelry and lash out at him if you don't get what you want. izana does it all and feels proud to be able to fulfill all of his precious omega's needs.
you often surprise him with your antics. it's not rare for you during one of your manic episodes to engage in risky behaviours and being overconfident. lucky for you izana is always keeping you under his watch and is quick to bring you somewhere safer and eliminate any danger.
he's always impressed at how long you're able to sleep. he'll leave for work early and come back at night and find you at the exact same place. it warms his heart to see his sweet omega looking so peaceful he wants to join you right here right now!
he does his best to keep up with your change in appetite. he constantly buys you a lot of food, the most diverse he can find and lets you do your little selection each day. he does worry when you eat very little though. that's why he tries to buy sweets and snacks he knows you love best. he's able to adapt himself very quickly, that's why he identifies which food you like to have during each episode or depending of your symptoms.
When you reject what he offers you with a scowl on your face, he takes it to heart and actually feel like he somehow failed as your alpha. he listens to any of your requests in hopes to make up for his mistakes.
HANMA
good luck with him tbh.
he met you when you were studying at the library of your university, although you surely were the prettiest omega he had ever seen, you seemed to drive people away from you. you didn't engage in social interactions and answered him with short and cold responses when he tried to make a conversation with you.
he actually is very fond of your extreme mood and snarky remarks : you never hold back your words and he loves it.
he doesn't reciprocate because deep down he cares a lot about you, but he does tease you when you don't seem really sensitive.
hanma absolutely lives for your choices and decisions in life, it doesn't matter how crazy and dangerous they are. he'll follow you and discreetly make sure you don't jeopardize yourself.
he has a lot of money and he'll happily let you spend it. he only asks for a few kisses and affection from you because he knows you hate that. push him away and he'll come back even more in love.
although he supports everything about you, there are things he doesn't tolerate. when you once felt like trying drugs and alcohol together, he took them away from you and looked the most angry he ever had. you would have shaken in fear if you were just any omega : his pheromones were filled with worry and anger, it was a new scent for him who was always so confident.
actually convinces you to quit school to live with him. your episodes make it hard for you to be around others for long periods of times, especially since you're an omega and you're drained easier of your energy. he doesn't understand why you just don't accept being with him 24/7.
you sometimes question why you actually listened to him because he seems to love provoking you. you do threaten him but he doesn't care.
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jellieland · 1 year
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Gem Cleo watches Scott leave. He's throwing wary glances over his shoulder at the tower that has what looks to her like a big red curly moustache on it.
It's always nice to see him, and this is a bit different to their usual encounters, which is really refreshing every now and then.
She pulls out the pufferfish he gave her and smiles at it brightly. "Hey there little guy!" She says. It stares back at her with unblinking black eyes.
"Dunno if you can call me a little guy when you're on a team with Bdubs, but sure, hey Cleo!"
She startles slightly. It's Martyn. He's not actively stabbing her, and apparently they're allies, so she turns to face him without much concern. "Hello Martyn!"
He's leaning against the rocky wall of the clock tower. He grins at her, and for a split second, his gaze flashes over to where Scott is disappearing into the trees across the river. "You still remember that thing I told you about last time, right?" He asks, giving her a meaningful look.
"Oh, yes, of course, absolutely!" She nods enthusiastically. "How could I forget!" It's funny, no-one else has really prodded at the details of Cleo's, uh, "amnesia cold", as much Martyn, although he's for sure just completely making things up to ask her about.
He looks highly amused. "Right, right, good. Just checking."
He glances over at the treeline again.
"So!" He says, and it's so very casual that it's a little bit concerning, "Don't suppose you'd let me know if Cleo's listening along or not?"
"Martyn!" She exclaims. "I'm-"
"Yeah, you are Cleo, I know, I know. Just." He pauses.
There's something in his eyes, suddenly, that gives Gem the impression that if she says the wrong thing here, something will be lost. She can't tell what, or why, or how. But it's a feeling she can't quite ignore.
After a second, Martyn shakes himself slightly and continues. "Actually, you know what, it doesn't matter. I-"
"No. She's not." Gem watches curiously as he goes very still. "I'm gonna tell her about it later, though."
"Huh." He says. It sounds very nonchalant. "Right. Well. Don't suppose I could tell you a secret, then?" He gives her a conspiratorial look. "Just you, I mean."
Gem leans in a little, intrigued despite herself. "I shouldn't..."
"Oh come on, you know you want to."
"Weeeeell..." She jumps in place a couple of times, and then nods quickly. "Alright, go on then!" He opens his mouth, and she quickly raises a finger to point at him, narrowing her eyes. "But! If it's something Cleo would want to know, I do have to tell them. It wouldn't be fair otherwise."
He considers for a moment, and nods. "Sure, seems fair enough to me. Trust me, though, Cleo would not want to be bothered by this. They have better things to worry about."
"I'll be the judge of that!" She pauses for a moment. "Because that's me." Another beat. "Because I'm Cleo."
He chuckles. "Well, Cleo, I just wanted you to know that I get it now." He says, lightly.
A few seconds pass.
"Um. Ok?" She says, because he seems to be waiting for her to respond. "Uh, I mean." She goes back to her perfect and beyond reproach Cleo impression. "Right. I understand what you're saying completely, Martyn."
He raises an eyebrow, grinning. "Well that's impressive. And here I thought I was being pretty cryptic."
"Oh. Um, I mean, what are you talking about? Explain yourself!"
He laughs, expression almost nostalgic. "Ah, I just meant I get why you chose him, last time." Once more, he looks over at where Scott disappeared from view. This time, he doesn't look back.
Gem frowns a bit, and stays silent. It feels wrong to speak.
"I wondered about that a lot, you know." He sounds vaguely wistful. "But I get it, now."
There is quiet for few more seconds before Martyn looks back at her, and the spell is broken.
He looks cheerful. There's nothing in his expression to suggest that he isn't.
"I think it's mostly that you and him are the only two on the server who have the slightest bit of common sense, honestly." He says. Something suddenly seems to occur to him, and he snorts. "Pretty sure he's alright at math, too."
"Oh, really?"
"...You know, I'm not sure actually."
He meets her eyes. His are just starting to turn the bright red of danger, the colour creeping in at the edges of the blue.
"He keeps his allies alive." He says. "For as long as he can. Even when it hurts him. Wasn't even a choice for you, really, when you consider that."
There's obviously something here she doesn't understand, but what exactly it is she doesn't know. "Good for him." She says awkwardly.
"It's not, really." He says.
"Oh. Um. Bad for him?"
He laughs at that. "Sort of, yeah." He looks down at the pufferfish she's still holding. "Alright for you though, right?" Before she's decided how to respond, he continues. "I just thought you'd like to know that if I were you, I would've chosen him too."
Gem frowns at him. There's something here. There's something here, but while she can certainly guess, she just doesn't have the context to know what that something is.
She listens to the noises of the river for a while before she speaks.
"Are you sure Cleo wouldn't want to know that?" She asks softly.
To his credit, he does appear to consider it, staring out over the river and frowning slightly.
After a minute, though, he looks back at Gem and shrugs. It almost looks resigned.
"Cleo already knows." He says.
She opens her mouth, but he keeps talking.
"Plus she would not appreciate being reminded of how similar we are." He grins, his expression suddenly sly. "And anyway, I completely made all that up. That was a test to see how good you were at being Cleo, and you failed."
"Hey!" She yells indignantly. "What! No! That's so rude!" She draws her sword and he cackles, dancing back.
"Ha, you should've seen your face!"
She glares at him. "Why are you so good at acting, huh?"
He raises an eyebrow. "Aren't we all?"
"No!"
He snorts. "Yeah, I guess not. Just pure skill on my part, then."
Gem shakes her head at him, exasperated. How much of that was true, she has no clue. But if that's how he wants to play it, that's ok. "How about this: I won't tell Cleo about any of that so long as you don't try and mess with me again."
"What?" He gasps and claps a hand to his heart. "I thought you were Cleo!"
She narrows her eyes and raises her sword, and he hurries to continue, holding up his hands in surrender.
"By which I mean yeah, sure, sounds good to me am I right?"
"Good." She nods firmly. "That's what I thought you meant."
He nods back at her a couple of times, then starts to retreat towards the river, still facing her. "Well. See you, Cleo!"
"Bye! If you see Etho tell him to be afraid!" She shouts after him.
"Will do!"
And he disappears into the trees after Scott.
What an odd man.
She wonders if he knows that she wouldn't have told Cleo if he'd just genuinely asked her not to, without the deal or the confusion or the trickery. She's genuinely not sure if he realizes that.
She still doesn't know how much of all that was genuine.
She wonders if he does.
For some reason, she suspects not.
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theseawakes · 1 year
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Glimpse of Past (Marc Spector x teen!reader
summary: Marc emphatize with you when you showed up at his door and shared your past.
warnings: child abuse, death (mentioned) (lmk if I missed anything)
request: "Could I request a moonknight x teen reader (platonic) where reader usually helps them with finding people or finding information, kind of like “guy in chair”. And they often spend late nights helping Steven, Jake and Marc not spending a lot of time at home. Maybe Steven questions it but reader kinda shrugs it off. Then one day reader shows up covered in bruises and all of them tries to find out what happened but reader doesn’t want to tell them but then reveals that it was one of reader’s parents. And Marc becomes really protective because of what happened to him when he was a kid. You can decide the ending if you want but I would love to see some Hurt/Comfort."
a/n: I'm sorry I only did it with Marc, I sorta wrote it to take set right after incidents in season 1 with reader not knowing Steven and Jake yet
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Marc Spector wasn't the one who worked well with people, but he eventually got a hang of it, thanks to you.
The mercenary never intended to have someone working off-screen for him. You were a threat. You came too close to Marc's secret job for his liking, prying on his night activities and even providing proof. Khonshu was telling Marc to get rid of you, but you butted him first by signing yourself to work with him. Marc couldn't risk someone knowing his night profession, and he didn't wanna kill a child. And judging your ability to be able to uncover the whole Moon Knight thing just reveals that you could be more than useful. So work with him, you did.
Yet earning the certain Spector's trust was hard. There were more than a handful of times when you gotta prove to him that you were, indeed, more than useful for him to fully trust you. Which you consider weird because he was the one who saved you from "getting rid of."
The crescent moon turned into full then turned anew. You found yourself rather at home with Marc than at your actual house. Oftentimes, you spend days with him even if he doesn't go on missions. As much as Marc hated to admit, he does enjoy it too. He enjoys hearing your antics in the comms, he enjoys hearing you read a book of pun jokes and coming home to you spreading out on the couch after a long mission.
You left him with a note that says, "I'll be back soon" once and have never been back ever since. His worry starts to grow as high as those skyscraper buildings. It's been weeks and Marc couldn't find any sign of your existence. Nevertheless, he prayed to anyone listening to him to keep you safe.
You are, in fact, not safe
Your hand trails on the newly made black eye on your face. A wince was shown on your reflection in the mirror.
You never intended to go home. You never wanted to go home. You were going to buy something in a store when you accidentally crashed into one of your father's friends. They immediately took you back to him and he was beyond furious. He locked you in your room for days and only opened the door to feed or beat you.
He had thrown out all your electronic devices; he made sure to cut any way of communication with the outside world so you weren't able to reach Marc. You were glad you left your camera in Marc's place, it was a gift from your late brother, the one you used to spy on Marc.
Your father let you out recently because he needs help to do chores. You still get beatings if you don't do exactly what he says. The newest black eye was obtained from dropping a bottle of beer because your hand hurts from his beatings.
Sighing heavily, you looked outside the bathroom when you heard a knock on the door.
The man sitting on the armchair paid no attention to it, locking his eyes on the TV. He, however, bitterly spat, "Get the door, they're my friends."
"Why don't you get it yourself?" You whispered under your breath, thinking he couldn't hear you. He did.
"What the fuck did you just say to me?" Your body flinched when you heard his boots making their way to where you are. "You should be glad I let you out that room." A slap. "You ungrateful bastard of a child." Another slap. "You should be glad I even spared your life!" This one almost sends you to the floor, but his hands pull you by your collar and smash your body to the nearest wall. "You took everything from me. My wife, my son, my good and perfect life with them!"
Your body made contact with the cold hard sink before falling to the floor. Groaning in pain, you felt another thing stomping your abdomen several times. After what felt like forever, your father finally stopped. With your final energy, you look at the front door. Seeing as your father and his friends were occupied by the TV, you dashed out of the bathroom and eventually out of the house. They noticed, of course, but you didn't care, all you cared about was running away as far as you can. You run to the only place you had in mind. The last thing you remember was knocking your hand on the familiar dark wooden door.
Marc scanned your sleeping form on the couch, noting the many differences between your usual self before your disappearance and now. Your clothes looked more like it's hanging on your body. Dark spots are circling your eyes with a slight dark blue color on one of them. Your skin is littered with bruises; purple, blue, even yellow. You look so… fragile. Totally different from the last time he saw you.
The time Marc realized you were not coming back or went "missing", he tried to find you by asking people he knows who know you. He tried looking and digging for information on where you live since you never told him. But he found nothing.
When he opened the door and saw you, he was beyond relieved to know that you were still alive. However, his heart dropped the moment he looked into your eyes. The sight was too familiar to him. He swore he caught a glimpse of himself inside those E/C eyes. And that was all he needed to know about your state before carrying your collapsed body to the couch.
The Khonshu Avatar watched as your eyes fluttered open, squinting a few times to adjust the light. Your head turned to see him despite it throbbing terribly. Tears clouded your blurry vision but you could still see Marc moving towards you. Your eyes widened in realization of someone coming towards you. With a jerk, you stand up and immediately back away from the person.
"Y/N?" Marc questioned.
You looked down as your feet kept dragging you away from the man. "I'm sorry, I won't do it again. I promise! I– it was my fault, I'm sorry, I am. I didn't mean to disobey you, I didn't mean to kill them, I'm sorry, please don't hit me, I didn't mean—"
"Y/N, it's me, it's Marc." Marc tried to cut you but failed as you replayed your muttering again and again and he'd be lying if that didn't shatter his heart. "Bud, it's all fine. You're alright. They can't get you here. You're safe," he made his voice as soft as he could.
His arms gently reach out for your shaking figure. The mercenary is fighting back the tears that started to form in his eyes. Alarms blazed in his head when you tried to hit your head. As if out of instinct, he leaped to engulf you in his arms, preventing you from hurting yourself. He could still hear you mutter through your tears, "stupid me, I shouldn't have– I shouldn't –"
"Shh, stop it, Y/N, please don't hurt yourself. You're alright, I've got you. It's alright. Follow my breathing, okay? In, 1 2 3, hold it, out 1 2 3. Come on, you can do it. Again." You followed Marc's instructions, breathing in and out with him. Marc's hand never stopped circling your back to calm you down and it worked. Once your crying has reduced into small hiccups, you clung onto the back of his shirt as he rocks you back and forth. "There you go, better?"
You moved your head up and down while wiping a single tear. "Yeah," you answered. Looking up at the man, you noticed his eyes were a bit puffy too. Has he been crying? "I'm sorry, Marc."
The dark-haired man patted your head softly. "You didn't do anything wrong."
"They died because of me, my mom and my brother." You paused. "She died giving me a chance to live in this cruel world, and he died saving me to continue living in it. I don't need him to remind me every chance he gets that I killed them because I already live with the guilt every day."
The confession you made sent a jab to his heart. He knows how it feels to be in your shoes. He knows it all too well. When he looked inside your eyes he saw a glimpse of his past, and that was all he needed to know what happened. It was exactly what happened to him, and it pained him to acknowledge it. Marc pulled you into another embrace when your tears started spilling out again. Then somehow when he glanced at the top of your head, he saw the hair that belonged to his younger self, which only caused him to pull you closer.
"It wasn't your fault, kid," he replayed what Steven said to him on their trip down memory lane. "It wasn't your fault that they died. It wasn't anyone's."
Marc's words only trigger more tears to come out of your eyes. You tighten your grip around him, allowing yourself to break down in his arms. It wasn't after a few minutes that you had calmed down. "I don't wanna go back there."
"You don't have to. We'll sort things out later. For now, let's tend those bruises, eh?" Marc helped you get to the couch before he went to grab the med kit. When he was about to get back, you jumped off the couch.
"The scarab!" you shouted, now remembering that Marc had gone for the scarab before you were taken back to your house. The pain going through your body made you wince. "What happened to the scarab? Did you find it?"
The Moon God's avatar ignored your question as he hurried to your place to sit you back down and gave you an ice pack for your black eye. He hesitated to answer you for a moment, afraid of what your reactions might occur. "I did. I saved the world. Kinda."
"What!?" There it is, the reaction. You stood up again, ignoring the pain this time. "You saved the world!? How? What did you do? What happened?"
Marc sighed. "Will you sit back down? You're in pain."
"Please, this is nothing more than knowing you saved the world without me." You scoffed, earning a chuckle from Marc.
"Alright, fine, I'll tell you everything. Now sit back down, kid." You lowered yourself to the couch again, watching Marc start to tend your bruises. "It happened in Cairo."
-
taglist: @andromacher @pauldanos-world @atzlena @blustalker
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dannyandthekiszkas · 4 months
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hi. there's no good time to post this so i just am. this is going to be very honest, and probably quite long, so i would ask that you please take the time to read all of it before coming to any conclusions or judgements. what i'm going to say might very possibly get me blacklisted on here but i'm hoping that i, as a person, mean more to those of you that i've come to consider friends than a difference of opinion does (even a controversial one). anyway, here goes nothing:
i don't hate hannah.
i'm not saying she's flawless, or even a good person, or that the things she's done haven't been completely worthy of backlash, because they absolutely are, but i don't think she necessarily deserves all of the treatment that she gets from this fandom either.
i've gone back and forth recently between just pretending she doesn't exist (and frankly wishing more folks would do the same instead of the alternative) and actively wanting to give her the benefit of the doubt. because i do enjoy her music. and i believe that people deserve second chances and adequate time to prove that they've grown as a person. (we gave it to danny and we gave it to josh.) but in the end, i've stayed silent about her entirely because i know how seemingly universally hated she is, at least in this corner of the fandom, and i didn't want to get my head torn off.
but there comes a point where there's a big difference between calling her out when she's genuinely doing something bad and just complaining about her because you don't like her. the latter comes off as bullying to me, to be completely honest, and it lends credibility to her claims that a majority of the hate she receives stems from jealousy and misogyny.
you can think she's not very talented. you can think the mistakes she made are unforgivable. you can find how she interacts with greta fans to be obnoxious and arrogant. but at the end of the day, continuously bad mouthing her is just giving her more to feed off of in return and giving her free real estate in your subconscious.
does this mean i'm actually a fan of hers? not really. i still couldn't care less about her most of the time, and i've only listened to her songs like maybe once each. i personally don't think she's grown or changed enough for me to feel comfortable actually trusting her and calling myself her fan. maybe one day i will. but i also don't hate her and i'm having a hard time being somebody who so readily accepted that the boys have grown over the years while actively refusing to entertain the possibility that she can do the same thing. nuance is very important to me, and something i'm trying to work on having more of.
she's not going anywhere. at least for a while. that much is clear. sam loves her. they seem very happy together. (one rumored argument doesn't negate the dozens of other photos and videos and stories of how in love they are. and at the end of the day, we don't actually know them or the intimate details of their relationship no matter how much people like to say her posting about him so frequently makes it seem like we do.)
i do find it hard to reconcile the fact that danny seems to not like her, but then again reading into any of their relationships (whether it be the boys and their partners or any of the people they're close to in their personal lives) isn't something i've ever felt okay doing. we don't know anything for certain because it's not for us to know. all we can really judge is who they are publicly. i know in hannah's case that track record isn't great. but i also think that in the grand scheme of things and the laundry list of artists out there who are genuinely shit human beings and are still famous and beloved, she's pretty mild by comparison.
if i get hate for this, i understand. to be honest, i'll be surprised if i don't. i want to make it clear that i'm not saying she's never done anything wrong, or saying that anybody should forgive and forget or stop calling her on her bullshit. but i do think this fandom constantly going after her for every little thing, specifically things that aren't inherently bad, looks worse for us than it does for her.
this is super rambly and stream-of-consciousness, so thank you for reading if you made it this far. i can't expect that everybody is going to take this well, and i'm not going to try and guilt people into not blocking me or coming after me for this. but it's how i feel, and i understand that it's probably a deal breaker for some of you in terms of continuing to talk to or follow me, and i have to live with that. i can't keep existing in this fandom and pretending like i always agree with everything everybody around me says or thinks. that's not healthy, and it's not the kind of person i want to be.
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bananachipfantasy · 22 days
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I'm bored, so I'll say my Headcanons if good omens characters were teachers.
Pt 1:
Aziraphale.
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Obviously he would be a history and literature teacher, always in the school bookstore.
A very sweet, calm and understanding teacher, but if you disrespect him he will establish order. He's empathetic with his students, but he is not a fool and if he has to disapprove of you, he will. But he will do everything possible to make you pass.
He'll sometimes bring tea or something sweet for his students if they behave well and do the activities.
His way of evaluating will not be so much with exams because normally they respond from memory, and with that they do not learn anything, and he doesn't want that.
He would be able to bring an old book from his library just to show them. He would possibly give classes to the younger classes and from time to time to the older ones.
Crowley.
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Gym or biology teacher (or both). He makes his rules very clear from the first step he took into the room. He makes them follow, and rewards those who behave well, but without giving them a crown.
He is very good at explaining and very fun, looking for a way to do dynamic classes without writing a lot but still understand. Sometimes he evaluates with exams, but like Aziraphale, that method doesn't suit him.
If you disapprove, you disapprove, and he won't do anything about it. Even if you cry in his house every night.
If he sees you eating in class he will ask you to give him something to try. Very occasionally he brings food to class.
He hates Wikipedia, so it is forbidden to use it in his class.
Gabriel.
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"Haha, classes with Aziraphale/Crowley, be good to him, you don't want to see him angry." He says that every time he sees them. He is the principal of the school and he loves going through the halls seeing that everything is going well.
He listens carefully to his students when they talk to him or ask for something, he takes it into account, but he doesn't avoid cracking jokes in the middle. Even so, he makes it clear to them that their opinions are valuable.
He's just that cool director that everyone loves. Except some teachers.
Has a teacher missed class? He will give them to you in their place.
Beelzebub.
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They are biology teacher too. Much tougher than Crowley about their classes. And they have no mercy at all.
They only tend to be good to those students who behave well and follow their orders. The alumns tend to have a lot of respect and some fear every time they approach them. They have that reputation as a strict teacher.
They seem to lose this attitude when the director is around. Everyone knows that they're in love.
They take many exams on purpose.
They work with newly enrolled courses.
Michael, Uriel and Saraqael.
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All three could be teachers of math, science, physics or chemistry. They speak kindly but in a tone with obvious helplessness, denoting respect from the moment they enter the classroom.
They use the phone a lot to work, but they control too much how they use it. If they see their students chatting or using their phones when it is not for activities, they take them away.
They constantly look around the room and maintain order, any little detail and they can catch your attention. You won't even be able to buy them with apples. They have no favoritism for anyone or anything. They meet sometimes to talk about how their students are behaving and how classes are going.
Sometimes they don't see Gabriel as a good director, but there is nothing they can do. They tend to judge Aziraphale and how he teaches. They don't even look at Crowley.
They fill your pages with question marks. Saraqael and Uriel put in an explanation about what you should change/improve, but Michael leaves you wondering unless you ask. They only work with the classes that graduate.
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rebeccadewinterthinks · 6 months
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Good omens The Book of life Conspiracy theory Part 1
okay, firstly, i should say that it's gonna be a pretty long read so if youre ready, let's activate our Aziraphale detective mode and investigate!
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let's imagine the first season as a solid rock, standing firm, while the third season is something hidden in the mist. The second season, however, turned out to be strange, with many hints, unfinished thoughts, mirrors (in which everyone sees something of their own), and hanging lines (some call them Chekhov's guns). I like to imagine it as a shaky rope bridge, connecting the first season to the third. It stretches over an abyss, at the bottom of which sharp stones of fanatical quirks and fetishes await, it is littered with glass shards of viewers' hearts, and anyone who steps on it will inevitably slip on the damp traces left by those who tried to cross it before them. The wind of unrestrained fantasies, coming from the side of the ocean of theories, sways this already unstable bridge, making it almost impossible for any sensitive traveler to maintain their emotional balance and mental health.
my new investigation is based on very ephemeral grounds, so I try to hold on as tightly as possible to those almost invisible handrails that Neil has extended for us. I cling to any available clue, trying not to fall into the abyss, and after each careful step, I pause for a moment and catch my breath. Everything around is hidden in the mist.
1. Conspiracy
let's take a close look at the scene of Gabriel's trial [12:47 Ep.6].
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«I see. You're casting me down to Hell. Well, I accept my fate. Sometimes an angel just has to say, «Guys, enough.»
Gabriel is completely calm. It's not unexpected for him. He was prepared for the Fall and doesn't object. Why? Because Beelzebub awaits him in Hell, everything is fine. Probably, they had agreed in advance that they wouldn't stay in Hell but would simply escape when they had no other choice.
«Gabriel, you are not going to Hell…»
we carefully observe Gabriel's changing facial expression as Metatron reads the verdict to him.
he's nervous, he thinks quickly. And judging by how quickly he figured out what to do, he's not as dumb as he seems. OR he already had a plan prepared for such a situation.
«Uh, just one thing. This clothes are tailored. Can I keep wearing them?»
seemingly, this is not the most appropriate question right now. But it serves several purposes: a) distraction (see, I'm an idiot and only think about clothes) b) we know that there's a Fly in his suit c) he suspects that he will receive an answer, and he needs a pretext to materialize the Big Box without arousing suspicion.
«I'll just need to take off my clothes and clean out my desk, then. I'll be right back.»
if you listen carefully, you can sense the relief in his voice, and he smiles again.
now let's move on to the final conversation with Beelzebub [28:10 Ep.6].
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«– You. Thank you. – Silly-silly angel. Why? – I was coming to you… But I… forgot.»
it seems they really had a plan. Why does Beelzebub give him the Fly-container? They couldn't not understand that sooner or later either their relationship would be discovered or he would face consequences for refusing to start Armageddon. The Fly was part of the plan. Most likely, «Thank you» was said precisely for this gift. But if Beelzebub assumed that Gabriel would erase his memory, then what does «Why?» mean? Why did you come to the bookshop? Why didn't you come to me (as we agreed)? «I was coming (intended to come) to you, but my memory was already in the Fly, so I forgot where I was supposed to go.»
he was going to Beelzebub, but in the elevator, he went to Earth.
*** This theory was translated into English by me, but all the credits owned by the original author of the theory
the part 2 of the theory is here
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ecoustsaintmein · 5 days
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Native Son, why it works in Ep 8 of MotA, and why it doesn't
I've written a quick post about it a while back, about how Rosie reading Native Son in Ep 8 makes sense thematically for the episode.
I reread it this weekend, and I have thoughts:
Background --
Native Son was published in 1940 and was written by Richard Wright, about a young black man who lives in Chicago, raised in a life a poverty and systemic racism which led to a life of crime.
Connection with the Tuskegee Airmen --
Within the first 50 pages we have this exchange between Bigger and his friends, when they saw a plane up in the sky:
"Looks like a little bird," Bigger breathed with childlike wonder.
"Them white boys sure can fly," Gus said.
"Yeah," Bigger said wistfully. "They get a chance to do everything."
(...)
"I could fly one of them things if I had a chance," Bigger mumbled reflectively, as though talking to himself.
Gus pulled down the corners of his lips, stepped out from the wall, squared his shoulders, doffed his cap, bowed low, and spoke with mock deference:
"Yessuh."
"You go to hell," Bigger said, smiling.
"Yessuh," Gus said again.
"I could fly a plane if I had a chance," Bigger said.
"If you wasn't black and if you had some money and if they'd let you go to that aviation school, you could fly a plane," Gus said.
For a moment Bigger contemplated al the 'ifs' that Gus had mentioned. Then both boys broke into hard laughter, looking at each other, through squinted eyes. When their laughter subsided, Bigger said in a voice that was half-question and half-statement:
"It's funny how the white folks treat us, ain't it?
"It better be funny," Gus said.
"Maybe they right in not wanting us to fly," Bigger said. "'Cause if I took a plane up I'd take a couple of bombs along and drop 'em sure as hell..."
(...)
"God, I'd like to fly up there in that sky."
"God'll let you fly when He gives you your wings up in heaven," Gus said.
The text was published in 1940. Also, spoiler alert -- Bigger was on the death row by the end of the book, so when we come back to the story of the Tuskegee Airmen, who does ALL the things that Bigger wants to do but couldn't -- those men were actively challenging the stereotype of a Black American of that era. And also fulfilling the prophecy that they will fly after Bigger's death...
And Bigger's conversation with Gus about how the white folk treat them -- it was unsurprising, but also reflected in (some of) the ways the Black PoWs were treated in the desegregated camps in ep 8.
Also interesting that Bigger mentioned how he wants to fly a plane to drop bombs...
Why it doesn't fully work (for me):
While I can see why Native Son was featured in not one but two (!!!) scenes, I can understand why Rosie was reading that (will come to that later), but I'm still struggling to find the significance of Sandra gifting it to Croz.
Also -- given all the points and themes that the book has attempted to discuss, and attempting to weave it into the plot of episode 8, it still sits uncomfortably with me that the Tuskegee Airmen were only introduced after 8 episodes (as if it is an afterthought, even if it wasn't meant that way), and that they barely get any lines at all in episode 9. Harking back to what Bigger and Gus just talked about:
"It's funny how the white folks treat us, ain't it?
"It better be funny," Gus said.
I'll let you judge for yourself.
Rosie and Native Son
I know we don't know, but -- whose book is it that Rosie is reading? Is it his? From the library?
In the final chapters, Bigger was charged with murder and rape, and he was represented by a Jewish-American lawyer named Boris Max, whom I feel to be the most unproblematic character out of all the characters in the book, and defended Bigger with everything he's got (think Atticus Finch, but with more communist-leaning).
Who else is a Jewish-American lawyer...oh wait. Rosie.
Max, like Rosie, is a non-judgmental character and basically a good listener all around, even if the intellectual points that he tries to make sometimes goes over Bigger's head.
This paragraph is telling of Max's character traits (and why it reminds me of Rosie's own strong-will and desire to keep fighting):
"Mr Max, if I was you I wouldn't worry none. If all folks was like you, then maybe I wouldn't be here. But you can't help that now. They going to hate you for trying to help me. I'm gone. They got me."
"Oh, they'll hate me, yes," said Max. "But I can take it. That's the difference. I'm a Jew and they hate me, but I know why and I can fight. But sometimes you can't win no matter how you fight; that is, you can't win if you haven't got time. And they're pressing us now. But you need not worry about their hating me for defending you. The fear of hate keeps many whites from trying to help you and your kind. Before I can fight your battle, I've got to fight a battle with them."
All in all, I can talk forever about the significance of the book and how it fits thematically into episode 8. However, it still leaves me wanting more from the Tuskegee Airmen plotline, and perhaps maybe more of Rosie's lawyering.
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qui-qui-quee · 5 months
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The Righteousness Barrier (long post)
AKA Christians, Stop Othering!
So here is the post I kept saying I'd make. As a disclaimer, if you expect me to be backing up whatever I'm about to say with Scriptures and verses, then I'm afraid I'll have to disappoint you. Whatever you read will be rough, wild, perhaps a little unorganized, but it's the best I can do for now.
And by all accounts, I can be wrong. Whatever I'm about to say, you can take it with a grain of salt if you so please. But I also ask that you read with good faith curiosity, and not with the internal aim to dismantle my points or go "this person is insane".
So. Here goes nothing. My realizations about what prioritizing sin does to us:
When we focus too much or prioritize sin vs. righteousness, we are unable to love other people to the fullest extent.
What do I mean by this?
Think about it. You grow up being taught what is sin, what is not, how to be righteous, how to avoid upsetting God with all of these guidelines, rules, verses, Scripture, whatever you want to call it. You listen to other people, or you study the Word on your own, or through the guidance of past, "strong" believers and theologians, and come to believe your convictions are true and/or the Scriptures are clear when they're used to back up these claims about what is good vs evil. So you live with this sense that because you are following or trying to follow these guideline, you are in God's will. And that those who do not are in sin, are lost, are plain wrong, are under the wrath of God, not following God's will, etc.
Then one day, you meet a person who believes very differently from you or disagrees with certain theologies. Or even a nonbeliever.
What do you think or feel about that person? Where does your mind immediately go?
I bet that many of you will say "this is a person loved by God, thus I will love them too."
But wait, I want to challenge you on that, because I don't think you or I would be telling the truth if we immediately make that claim.
Why? Because I think that's all just darn lip-service, and at the back of our minds whether unconsciously or not, our first thought will immediately go to their sin and unrighteousness especially once we find out about those disagreements (and it's not limited to just religious people).
That tendency, that instinct to judge a person by whether they have the right beliefs or not, serves as a big hindrance rather than asset when it comes to truly loving other people.
Chew on it. Picture yourself as a cis evangelical believing in "biblical" (traditional) marriage. Then think about how your queer loved ones may invite you to their same-sex marriage. Or perhaps, they ask you to call them by certain pronouns or refer to them by a certain gender. Or maybe they want to talk about their romantic partners who are living with them but are unmarried and are clearly sexually active.
Or picture yourself as someone incredibly pro-justice and then you meet someone who is wealthy and whose business doesn't treat their workers right. Or on the contrary, you believe in the necessity for working for your wealth, but then you meet a person who is living on welfare and doesn't appear to be doing anything to get out of their status and are busying themselves with drugs or whatnot.
Or, God forbid, you meet a self-described pedophile or minor-attracted person.
Do you feel uncomfortable when picturing yourself in such situations? Do you have real-life experience? Does it make you wish you didn't have to deal with any of that at all?
If so, that is precisely what I'm talking about: That discomfort.
(If not then I dunno why you're still reading this)
"Quiche, why would you lump all those things together? How dare you compare us to them?"
Ok I need to say this because social media is nasty:
Do not get me wrong, those are all very different and each have very different sets of consequences ranging from none (queerness) to actual jail time (child abuse or porn, robbery). But that's not my point here right now.
I am focusing on us. The discomfort we feel.
That discomfort can have a purpose, whether to protect us spiritually or to push us to justice. But in more cases than not, such as, I will argue, sexuality and gender, it's like a metal pole we stick between us and our neighbor, keeping us from getting closer to them.
In latter cases, that discomfort is our innate sense of self-righteousness shutting our heart out to that person. Our mindset about that person becomes set if that is our focus and it changes the way we relate to them.
We talk less with them. We spend less time with them. We don't get excited about changes in their life related to those things we think are wrong (unless it pushes them towards our camp). We keep thinking "this person is not in a good place and I don't want to encourage them to go further down that bad place."
That's the kicker. We become scared of possibly encouraging them towards bad behavior and belief. And we stop being able to really relate with them. That is the kind of barrier I'm talking about.
It prevents us from building deep, close-knit connections. It already has. How many of you lost friends because you had different beliefs about sexuality and gender? How much closer could you have been with that person if it weren't for the fact that they were trans or some other gender or some other wildly different denomination or religion?
In my own life, I have lost friends simply because of believing a very stringent view of sexuality. And for awhile, I believed it was solely their problem, not mine, when they left. I had failed to see the harm of holding on to those beliefs so strongly to the point it kept me from really getting to know people (not to mention the far more harmful consequences such as hate crimes and abandonment).
It wasn't until I learned to loosen those beliefs even a little bit, to consider the possibility of me being wrong about all this, did I realize I had the God-given freedom to deepen these relationships with others who were not necessarily in my "camp", without worrying about "condoning" or "encouraging" their "unbiblical" behaviors. Yet even now, I am still struggling with that as I continue on this little deconstruction journey.
After all, I am a product of Western evangelism where I was taught that we had all these doctrines right. But I digress.
Someone else had a term for this kind of behavior and thought process. It's called "Othering" and it is a product of our tendencies to categorize and imo, by extent, our sense of self-righteousness. We see someone we think are wrong or different and we immediately start "othering" them, setting them away from us. So we become blind to the way God can work in their lives, their potential to live a full life away from our camps. Instead of investing on each other, to spur each other towards love, peace, kindness, etc or even just being there for them, we think about their sin and keep an arm's length away and only really connect if there is a possibility that they will jump into our side of the issue.
So I suppose that's my challenge to everyone here, and to myself really. To really study the way Jesus broke down those barriers despite being as Holy as One can Be, by truly connecting with the "Other".
I challenge us to be more aware of our tendencies to "Other", our instinct to put differences above personhood, and to do our best to go against that instinct. I challenge us to worry less about someone else's sin and instead, trust in the Lord's sovereignty, the Holy Spirit's power, as we do our best to deepen those connections we are given and live abundant lives together.
There is no way we can bring God's kingdom to the world otherwise.
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trans-axolotl · 1 year
Note
I'm facing 6 months of compulsory treatment right now. How did you survive?
💜anon, I so deeply wish that this was not something that either of us have been forced to survive. I'll share what kept me going and I hope that some of it can resonate with you.
First: Always remember that no matter what they try to tell you, what ways they try to dehumanize you, what ways they try to convince you that you are inherently wrong, or broken, or need to be saved from yourself--you are always the expert on what it is like to live in your body and brain, and you always have the right to define your own narrative and truth and experience. there were many times while forcibly hospitalized where there was nothing I could do to actually change the things that were happening to me because I had no power. all I could do in those moments was hold onto the truth that I knew I didn't deserve this and that even if no one was listening, I believed myself and I was bearing witness to the fucked up things that were happening and that someday, i wouldn't be so incredibly trapped.
secondly: do whatever the hell you need to survive without judging yourself for whatever you need to do to get through it. you do not have to be a "good patient"--you can be a "terrible patient" and that doesn't mean you're a bad person. during these last 4 months I was instituionalized, there was times that it was too hard to process the fucked up power structures and everyday violations because I couldn't process it while it was still actively happening to me. some days i needed to shut down and pretend that I was fine with everything happening and follow the rules and not let myself feel any rage or dream of what it was going to be like when i got out. other times, especially when i was younger, the only way i survived was by breaking rules, being a terrible patient, and demanding my autonomy in whatever way was accessible to me. sometimes that looked like destroying my room, swearing at staff, self harming because that was the only thing i had any fucking control over at all. and letting go of judgment for what I had to do to survive helped me get through it. knowing that I had so very few options and was doing the best I could to feel like a person and that as much as they wanted to make me feel like shit for it, I was not a bad person for needing to feel human.
thirdly: know your rights and if possible, have a person on the outside who knows your rights and can advocate for you on the phone. knowing your rights doesn't always mean much because hospitals and psychs still sort of break the law anyway, but knowing what your rights are about how many times you see your treatment team a week, how long they can commit you, what the rules are about forced medication and forced antipsychotics, what the rules are about restraints, visiting--all of that can help you advocate for yourself and recognize when the people in power are lying to you.
fourthly: there still will be moments of joy, even while instituionalized, and holding onto those and keeping them close helped me more than any of the treatment I received ever did. for me, becoming close to the other patients was incredibly healing. not always easy when we're all in crisis and don't have tons of emotional regulation, but listening to others stories, goofing around and rolling down the hallway together, making fun of nurses--the bonds I have with the people i was instituionalized with were truly lifesaving and taught me so much about what it means to love and take care of people. if you can, reach out to the other patients and get to know each other and how to share space with each other. it helps more than i can say. other moments of joy to hold onto--art, whether a million coloring sheets or graffiting onto the hospital walls, the moments you look out the window and see the weather changing, sneaking in vapes, little things like getting new bedsheets or if there's chocolate ice cream or learning how to do a handstand. even amongst everything, there will still be joy + love, and letting myself have that saved me.
fifth: depends on the rules of the place you can go to what is considered contraband or not, but bring comfort items, lists of phone numbers of people you want to stay in contact with, a journal, fluffy blanket, stuffed animals, art supplies, candy, comfy clothes, anything that brings you some peace. it really helped me to do a journal entry every day so that I could have some record of what was actually happening so that I wouldn't forget when I looked back later. that made me feel more grounded and secure.
sixth: Embrace whatever healing you can find in there. this doesn't have to be the bullshit you hear in group therapy or ridiculous worksheets, but if the shit you hear in group therapy works, then by all means embrace it. if embracing your rage helps, hold onto it. if other patients coping skills resonate with you, use them. it is incredibly fucking hard to heal while being instituionalized and there is absolutely no shame if you don't feel like you're getting better, but it's okay to find those moments of healing despite it all and fight for yourself and fight for building a better life in whatever way that means for you.
overall just know that whatever you are feeling--rage, sadness, pain, relief, fear, panic, grief--you are allowed to feel all of it and feel it as deeply as you need. you are not alone in this. I am so sorry that you are facing the threat of compulsory treatment right now, and know that I believe that you will survive this. depends on the rules so I don't know if you'll have your phone while you're in treatment or not, but feel free to come back, ask for advice, complain as much as you want because it can really fucking suck. know that you are allowed to take up space, you are allowed to exist as a full person with wants, opinions, and desires, and that you are allowed to be struggling, wanting support, and that you never deserve to be locked up and be treated as anything less than the beautifully complex and worthy person that you are.
followers who have faced forced psych treatment before, if you have any words of encouragment or suggestions for anon, please add on <3
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skratchytheclown · 5 months
Note
Can we get a little info on each of the Koopalings?
Sure! I'll pull up some older drawings of them, and then tell you a bit about all of em:
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Larry:
14 years old
Enjoys playing video games and listening to music
kind of a sassy child
Likes to be active while also enjoying the occasional "couch potato day"
A bit of a thrill seeker
That one kid who thinks he is ready to be an adult already (he isn't)
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Morton (uhh... don't mind the image.):
16 years old
kinda just does what the others are doing, really.
Doesn't like it when there is conflict between his fellow koopalings.
Just kind of confused
Still competent and reliable
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Wendy:
19 years old
Has had enough of everyone's crap
Anger issues
Likes to hang out with Roy and Ludwig, mostly
A bit of a tomboy
Verbally judges everyone (even MT)
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Iggy:
21 years old
Likes to laugh at everything. C'mon dude, it's not that funny
Pretty intelligent, actually
You blink and he disappears
Can't read a room
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Roy:
23 years old
Got his drivers license at 22 (brags about it)
Best friends with Stewart.
Annoys MT all the time (how is he still alive)
Likes to stream himself doing the most mundane things. Became relatively internet-famous
Is usually pretty reasonable
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Lemmy:
26 years old
Gets mad when you call him short or "a kid"
Disgustingly jolly all the time
He likes to bother Roy and Ludwig with clown stuff
Doesn't process the possible consequences of his actions
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Ludwig:
28 years old
Feels the need to keep everybody on track
A bit cold
The most cunning of the group
Wishes the rest of the koopalings would take their jobs more seriously
Tends to bring logic and realism into everything
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apushforfolly · 2 years
Text
A Wishful Plea
Prelude
"Look, can you help me or not?" Jan asks as he casually flexes his arms in front of me.
I gulped as I looked down, blushing like a tomato. I catch a smirk on his face since he thinks that a little gun show can convince a faggot like me to do his projects. In his mind, he assumed that I'm just like any other horny gay dweeb who will do anything for a hunk like him in exchange for his attention. I grit my teeth as I felt so hurt by his thoughts of me and how little I am to him.
"Look Janos, I want to help you but midterm is coming up and I-I need to get my grades up or else I'm going to lose my scholarship." I meekly replied as I forced myself not to cry.
His demeanor changed as he reached for his gym bag and fetched a notebook. He put it in front of me as he clasped his hands.
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"The details are in this notebook. Finish it before the weekend and call me when it's done." He said as he stands up and walks outside the cafe.
I can see in his mind what he plans to do if I can't finish his project in time. I felt my eyes tearing up as I slowly reached for the notebook and held it in my hand. I blame myself for not being able to stand up for myself and for letting everyone push me around. Tears fell down my cheeks as I put the notebook in my bag and went straight to the restroom to avoid the public eye.
I locked myself in the cubicle while trying my best not to be so loud. I just wish for once that I can be strong enough to say no. That I can make someone listen to what I have to say. That I wasn't as pathetic as I am right now.
"Why did you let him do that to you?" I raised my head as I thought I heard a voice.
"See, you have the power to make that guy go away. Why didn't you use it?" I looked around the stall as I heard another disembodied voice.
"Is someone there?" I asked while trying my best to stop crying.
"Seriously, you know that I'm talking to you telepathically, right?" The voice said as I figured that he was speaking directly into my mind.
"Bingo! So tell me then, why didn't you use your power to make that guy go away? You certainly have the capability to make that happen. Why didn't you?" The voice asked.
"What do you mean?"
"You do know you're an esper, right? Since you can also communicate with me then I would assume that you know how to use your ability."
"I really don't know what you're talking about. All I can do is hear people's thoughts. I tried to make it stop but I keep on hearing how they judge my appearance and belittle me in their mind." I replied as I recall every traumatic experience because of what I can do.
"Wow, guess accidentally finding out that your mother never wanted to have a child really messed you up. I'm sorry about that."
"No, it's okay. I'm already used to this. It just hurts sometimes but I'll be okay."
"Just so you know, it doesn't have to be this way. You have a wonderful gift and you can use it to make your life better. Just like I did."
"You mean you have this ability too?" I replied as I noticed that I just stopped crying.
"How do you think I was able to talk to you then? Are you sure that you're smart?" The voice jokingly stated, making me laugh out of shame.
"Sorry, it's just that this is my first time talking to someone like me. Can I ask your name? I'm Simon by the way."
"Call me Tyler. I'm not comfortable disclosing my information to someone like me, if you know what I mean?"
"That's not fair. You already read my mind."
"Yup, and that's on you since you didn't develop your power. Sucks, right?" His laugh echoed in my head as I felt a little embarrassed and paranoid about what he already knew.
"No worries, I will not harm you in any way. In fact, I'm here to help you use your ability. I will be your Yoda." Tyler proudly declared.
"Really? Do you mean that I will also learn to use my ability like you?"
"Yes, and much more. I can sense that from years of you trying to suppress the growth of your ability, it became powerful enough to activate on its own. One day, you might be even able to do anything that you can think of."
"You mean that it can be turned off?"
"Some people like us have been born with the gift but not as powerful as we have. They spend their lives meditating and practicing and all they could do is bend spoons or read minds. On the other hand, you don't even have to lift a finger and you can easily communicate with me." Tyler declared with amusement in his voice.
"I know that. It's just that I don't see myself as someone capable of doing so. All my life I felt cursed with this. Everyone wishes to have an ability like this but once they hear what their loved ones think about them, it's over. One way or another, their power becomes a curse." I replied with a bitter tone.
"And that's why I'm here! I can help you control your ability so that will never happen again. You can learn to only hear the thoughts of people that you want. And perhaps even more!"
"Will it help me better myself?"
"It will if you let it."
I let out a sigh as I thought about how difficult my life has been and how peaceful that would be. All I want is to be able to live a life where I can achieve my dreams without people belittling and forcing me to conform to their standards.
"Okay, I'm in. Let's do this." I replied to Tyler.
"Awesome, I have some thoughts on how your ability works now. Think of having a switch for that telepathy of yours."
"Okay?" I replied hesitantly but still did what was told.
"Great, now flick the switch and turn it off."
I close my eyes as I picture a switch in front of me and flick it off. Suddenly, there was silence. I quickly open my eyes and touch my ears to check if I still have them.
"Hahahaha! Nice one! I know you can do it." I hear Tyler laugh as I smile.
My eyes started watering as I began crying my eyes out.
"It's wonderful, isn't it? I could only imagine how good silence can be to someone like you. But don't worry now, I am here and I will help you have the life that you want." Tyler said as my tears fell down my face.
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softxsuki · 7 months
Note
꒰ ˆ ꒵ ˆ꒱ Hi, Han! Congratulations on 1000+ followers! I've been around since you hit 400 and I couldn't be more proud of you and how far you've come. You're too good for this world and just seeing you pop up in my notifications puts a smile on my face. („⊹𝅒⊹„) I'm sure you’ll get even more supporters soon (as you deserve) and I hope I'll get to see your blog keeping on growing! Thank for all of the content you put out for us, this plataform wouldn't be the same without you and would mean a lot less to me. (ノ´ヮ`)ノ*: ・
Anyway, if it's okay, could I please send in a request for the event?
❥ Pronouns:
𖤣 they/them
❥ Fandoms:
𖤣 Tokyo Revengers, Obey Me, Jujutsu Kaisen
❥ Gender:
𖤣 It doesn't matter!
❥ Type of matchup:
𖤣 Romantic
❥ Myer-Briggs Personality Type:
𖤣 INFP-T
❥ Zodiac:
𖤣 Sagittarius
❥ What I value:
𖤣 loyalty; open-mindedness; respect.
❥ My type:
𖤣 I don't think I have one, I never judge people by their looks and don't consider anyone I've met, until now, ugly.
❥ What's my personality like:
𖤣 observant; pretty short-tempered; indecisive (but i do make good choices); smart; ambivert; creative; genuine; lazy; camera shy; optimistic; I can get easily confused; forgetful; moody; reliable; sassy; people say I have great taste (for music, fashion, food, crushes, decorations, locations, etc); spontaneous; stubborn; sensitive;
❥ Hobbies/things I like to do:
𖤣 I don't think I have any talent to hobbies... So here are the things I like to do: traveling; shopping; exploring new places; spend hours swinging on swings; listening to music; eating out; collecting plushies;
❥ Details:
𖤣 I'm at my last school year and still have no idea of what to do with my life; I'm from Brazil; I've been trying to gain a little bit of weight; I have a sweet tooth; I'm very picky when it comes to food;
❥ Kind of scenario:
𖤣 Hmmmm, maybe what mornings with them are like?? I really don't know!!
𑁍 Take your time, Han! I hope you have an amazing day and life!! Thank you for existing, you're insanely special to me and to many others. 𑁍
1000 Follower Event Matchup #27
This event is CLOSED. You can view the event masterlist here.
Note: Thank you! It's crazy that I made this event when I hit 1k and now I'm at 1.5k...these matchups took me way too long. I'm so sorry for the wait. But omg you've been around since I was at 400 followers :( you've stuck with me for a while! Thank you so much for all your support. I hope you like who I matched you with <3
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I match you with: DRAKEN, BEELZEBUB, ITADORI
Runner-ups were: Mitsuya, Lucifer, Megumi
Draken:
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I feel like Draken would be your support system
He’s such a dependable guy, he’d want you to lean on him for once
He loves your sass btw, it adds a little spice to your relationship that keeps things interesting, so keep pushing his buttons
Always takes you out to eat, watching you with a little smirk as you happily enjoy your food (even if you’re picky and only eat chicken tenders with fries) as long as you’re happy he’s happy
He’s not the biggest shopper, but whenever you want to go out shopping he insists on tagging along, kinda playing your bodyguard and official bag holder, you’re not holding any bags with him around
What are mornings with Draken like?
Hmmm, I think he’s not the biggest morning person, so he’s a little slow at waking up (after all, he lives in a brothel which is more active during the night)
Groggy morning voice as he cuddles into you, hiding his face in the crook of your neck 
So definitely a slow morning, but be happy, because you’re getting an unusually clingy and cute Draken lol
Beelzebub:
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This man’s brother is the avatar of sloth lol, he’s pretty fond of your laziness
Beel is our gentleman :( he’s a big ol teddy bear
Super loyal and respectful, he treats you like you’re his treasure
Pls don’t lose your temper with him :( he’d get all pouty, though having Satan as his brother, he is pretty used to it, but it would hurt more if you specifically get mad at him
You’re eating out like 10 times a day with him LOL
If you’re a picky eater, he’d gladly take whatever you don’t want from your plate, and even shares some things on his own plate that you love :( <3 so in love omg
And if you’re trying to gain weight, he’s the perfect person to help you out with that :D 
What are mornings with Beel like?
Well…he’s already up in the kitchen making you both breakfast
Surprises you with breakfast in bed every morning and is actually able to control his urges and manages to not eat the entire plate before it reaches you
He’s down to do whatever you want for the day, he’ll follow you around :) so long as you feed him along the way
Itadori:
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This cutie is perfect boyfriend material, especially for you
I picture him taking so many off-guard pictures of you to save to his phone; no matter how much you try to convince him that you look horrible in them, he just spends the next few days gushing over them, admiring the small image of you on his phone <3
He feeds your plushy addiction, he finds your collection cute and loves seeing how happy you get when you get a new one added in 
Loyal golden retriever boyfriend 10000000%
Goes on a walk to the park with you while you swing on the swings side by side, chatting and eating the ice cream he bought you :D 
What are mornings like with Itadori?
Energetic…I hope you’re a morning person, because he’s fresh as a daisy pretty early in the morning, ready for another adventure with you
He’s the type to watch you as you sleep, waiting excitedly for you to wake up, and eventually you do wake up from feeling him watch you lol
Morning kisses are a must and maybe even some cuddles
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EVENT REQUESTS ARE CLOSED
REGULAR REQUESTS ARE OPEN
Posted: 08/28/2023
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heliosoll · 2 years
Note
Why do you think shifting comes so easily to you?
I had to think quite a bit about how to answer this because I want to be fully honest with you.
It didn't come easy to me. It does now, but not at first. I'm very open about how much trouble I had with shifting at first because 1. I don't want to lie, and 2. I know it could help people who are dealing with the same issues.
I'm not sure exactly why you're asking me this but I want to make it very clear that if you're coming from a place of judging yourself or comparing my shifting journey to yours, stop. It will not help you, it won't make you feel better. I can give you all the advice in the world and it still might not help because we're two different people and your shifting journey will inevitably be different from mine. What works for me and how I like to shift could be completely different from your preferences!
But anyway, I didn't have an easy time with shifting when I first discovered it. I obsessed over it, I placed it on a pedestal, I was convinced that failure was a real thing and that my previous "failures" were holding me back. I had tons of limiting beliefs and doubts! I'm positive that I still would've eventually shifted at some point thinking like that, but my first shift was prompted by me throwing all of that away. I stopped caring about what other shifters were saying, I stopped caring about my "failures", and I just threw shit to the wind and said fuck it. I'm gonna shift no matter what and literally nothing can stop me.
Shifting comes easy to me now because I'm still in that mindset. I don't pay attention when other shifters say anything that sounds even remotely limiting. Hell, for the most part, I'm not active in any shifting community outside of tumblr and youtube. And even here I'll still see shit like that. Shifting is easy for me because I recognize that it's an innate ability that everyone is capable of. That literally everyone can do it and that it's something you're just born knowing how to do. The only reason people have trouble with it here is because this is a reality where shifting isn't considered normal or even "possible". But in a reality where it is? Do you think the people there have trouble with shifting? Hell no!
It's all about your mindset. And trust me, I know that can be frustrating to hear. But listen, you don't need to work extra hard and put in hours to "change" your mindset about shifting. You certainly can if you want to, but you don't need to. The only thing you really need to tell yourself is "shifting is easy for me and I can do it regardless of everything" (and/or any variation of that, anything with a similar meaning). You don't even need to believe it for it to be true. You can have mountains and mountains of doubts and limiting beliefs and still shift. And that's the important part!
It doesn't matter if shifting is "easy" or "hard" for you because you're still going to shift. Nothing can stop you. You don't need to have the perfect mindset - shifting doesn't need to come easy to you. You're still going to shift!! And that knowledge is a major facet of the "master shifter" mindset. I want you to try throwing everything out. Don't think about anything else. Allow yourself to think of shifting as just that. Shifting. It's just shifting. There's nothing hard about it. There's nothing extra you need to do. There's nothing you need to worry about. You just need to let yourself do it. That's all.
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z-iridest · 5 days
Text
Yu-Gi-Oh: Renegade
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Chapter 5:
Previously on Yu-Gi-Oh: Renegade:
' "In 3 months, I will be holding a Derby Duel Tournament. It is open to all who wish to compete." Leon Dracnus announced on live TV.
"Look, everyone deserves to play the game they love without facing prejudice, without consequences… This baby," Yuko gently patted the broken down Phoenix Whirlwind, "is the key to jump starting that change. But, I'm gonna need you guys behind me on this."
"There'll never be a time you can't count on me." Adom replied.
"Good luck, Yuko, my girl." Pops told her before Yuko raced out of the garage and away from her chosen family.
"Remove your helmet and deactivate the gear, reject. I know you're a duelist, and one from the Jade Phoenix Duel Gang judging by the symbol on your back."  
"You have Derby Duel gear yourself, right, Takano? Duel me. If I win, I go about my business and you act like nothing happened." 
"And why should I listen to what a reject like you asks of me?"
"Winning against me means you could get redemption from the big man topside. See, you're right in assuming I'm a duelist, I'm the leader of the Jade Phoenix gang, their best duelist."
"You're on, Birdie. You're in for one heck of a match, I hope you know what you're getting yourself into, kid! Wait, that Duel Disk... Where did that come from?!" Yuko felt a smirk cross her face at the Chaser's shock of the tech she'd built herself.
"I built it into my gear!"
What have I gotten myself into? She thought nervously as a countdown began to the beginning of the duel.'
With the Duel World spell activated, the world around them had changed giving it a bluish hue. "Ready... Set... Duel!" The computer counted down. Both duelists took off, their Life Point counters set to 4000 Life Points. Wait, are my eyes playing tricks on me? Why are my Life Points only at 4000? Yuko thought, her brow furrowing.
"In case you aren't familiar with Derby Duel combat, allow me to explain the rules. In Derby Duels, our decks are cut down to 40 cards each and our Life Points are only set to 4000 points. Unlike Turbo Duels back in the old days, we're allowed to use normal spells, but we do have hurdles that make things harder. For one thing, in the actual arena, if you knock your opponent out of bounds, they automatically lose. The first two to take that first turn are the first duelists to begin dueling. If one of the duelists in focus gets knocked out, either by a duelist or an obstacle, either the duelist that butted them out or the duelist closest to the remaining duelist takes over the duel. Much like Turbo Duels, though, if you hit zero while Derby Dueling, your wheels will lock up and you'll be forced to wipe out." Takano explained.
"In other words, you wanna be the last duelist standing." Yuko summed up.
"Too bad it won't be you, Birdie." Takano smirked. 
"We'll see about that, Takano." Yuko glared.
"Ready... Set... Duel!" The computer counted off, the two taking off as soon as the countdown hit the go mark.
Yuko- 4000                                           Takano- 4000
"Ladies first, reject." Takano smirked. Yuko rolled her eyes as she drew. A frown crossed her face. Mystical Space Typhoon, Spell Shattering Arrow, Shield Crush, Blast Magician, Monster Reborn and Unexpected Dai... Not too much to work with defense wise, but one monster's better than nothing but spells the first draw... Yuko thought. "What's the matter, giving up already?" Yuko scoffed at Takano's taunt.
"You wish! I'll kick this off by activating Unexpected Dai from my hand! Since I have no monsters on the field, I'm allowed to Special Summon a Level Four or below Monster from my deck, as long as it doesn't have any effects... So, Flamvell Guard, take to the field in defense mode!" The metallic dragon roared to life, flames coming off its body as it curled up in defense mode (ATK/ 100 DEF/ 2000). "Next, I summon Blast Magician in attack mode!" Blast Magician spun his staff, taking his place next to Flamvell Guard and standing at the ready, his eyes trained on the enemy (ATK/ 1400 DEF/1700). I'll end my turn there for now. Your move, Takano." 
​​​Yuko- 4000                                           Takano- 4000
"My turn! I draw!" Takano observed the cards in his hand before smirking a bit. "First, I'll summon Honest in attack mode!" An angel looking monster took to the field on Takano's side of the field, his wings unfurled and his eyes glaring fiercely (ATK/ 1100 DEF/ 1900). "Now, since I'm not dumb enough to attack you with a monster that has less attack power than Blast Magician, I'll end my turn with a facedown." 
"Wow, who knew you guys were actually smart? It's my turn now!" Yuko remarked, but before she could take her turn, she noticed something hurtling her way. She moved to the side, dodging it by a hair. Takano laughed at her. 
"I told you there were hurtles... From here on out on every other turn, the Duel World field spell automatically throws obstacles our way. In an arena, it would have obstacles set up, but this isn't your typical arena." Takano revealed.
"You were hoping I'd get knocked down by one of those, didn't you?!" Yuko accused.
"Don't accuse me of such a ridiculous thing, girl, now take your turn or I'll take it as a surrender!" Takano threatened.
Yuko- 4000                                           Takano- 4000
"I draw!" Yuko kept a steady pace as she looked at the cards in her hand. While she'd gotten one spell card out of the way, she still had her original four, plus her trap card: Trap Jammer. Least he won't be able to do anything to me with a Trap Card this upcoming turn... Yuko thought. "Blast Magician, let's leave a scorch mark! Attack Honest!" 
"You won't be able to touch him, Birdie! I activate the trap card, Compulsory Evacuation Device! This card allows me to target one monster and return it to the owner's hand, and I choose my Honest!" Takano smirked.
"I guess your dueling skills are rustier than you thought, because all that does is switch Blast Magician's target from your monster to you directly!" Yuko called out his mistake as his monster returned to his hand and Blast Magician turned his attention on Takano. His eyes grew wide.
"Wait, wait, wait!" He shouted but it was too late, Blast Magician closed in on Takano and sliced through the Ex Chaser with his scepter. Takano stumbled due to the damage he took, but managed to get his footing back. Yuko smirked.
"I'll end my turn by throwing down a facedown. Your move, Takano." Yuko smirked.
Yuko- 4000                                           Takano- 2600
"You snot-nosed, insignificant little- AH!" Distracted by his need to insult Yuko, he was tripped up by an obstacle thrown his way, the teenager snickering as he barely managed to stay on his feet. "What?! You cheater! You did that on purpose!"
"You forgot one of the rules: Since it's just the two of us dueling and we're outside the normal arena, any time one of us takes direct damage, we have to avoid an obstacle at the end of the turn." Yuko reminded him, smirking. Takano growled in response. 
"I draw!" Takano drew a card, but the look he gained on his face made Yuko uneasy. What is he planning? She thought as she kept pace with the ex Chaser. "I summon Horus the Black Flame Dragon Level Four! (Atk/1600 Def/1000)" Yuko's face paled as she came face to face with her own brother's dragon. There were 3 dragons with the same name: Level Four, Level Six and Level 8. Liam's entire deck had gone missing, and it chilled Yuko's blood to know that the dragons that her brother had once held dear were now on the hands of someone like Takano. Takano, meanwhile, smirked. "What's the matter, little duelist?! Dragon got your tongue?!" Takano cackled. Yuko glared.
"Take your turn, snake!" Yuko yelled. 
"As you wish! Horus the Black Flame Dragon Level Four, destroy her Blast Magician!" Takano announced the attack. The dragon roared and did as it was told, making Yuko cry out in pain as 400 life points were taken from her, her magician destroyed. "Now, his special effect activates! When I destroy a monster this turn, I'm allowed to send him to the graveyard and Special Summon Horus the Black Flame Dragon Level 6 from my hand or deck!" He laughed as the level four dragon disappeared, it's Level 6 version taking its place. It roared, Yuko recognizing the pain it was in. Don't worry, I'll find a way to get you guys away from him... I promise! She thought, hoping the dragon could hear her. "I end my turn due to Horus the Black Flame Dragon Level Four's effect!"
Yuko- 3600                                               Takano- 2600
"Then, it's my move now!" Yuko shouted before she dodged the hurtle coming her way and drawing her next card. Keeper of Dragon Magic! Yuko thought, smiling a bit before schooling her features. "I summon Keeper of Dragon Magic in attack mode! (Atk/1800 Def/1300)" She watched as the dragon armored magician burst to life, facing Takano and the level 6 dragon. 
"What is it with you and Spellcasters! You know that magician's far too weak to beat my dragon!" Takano called out.
"I know, I'm not attacking with him!" Yuko called out. "I activate his effect! By discarding Spell Shattering Arrow, I can draw Polymerization from my deck to my hand. But, that's not all! By revealing a fusion monster from my deck, I can special summon one of the materials needed to summon it in defense position! So, Luster Dragon, join us on the battlefield as I reveal First of Dragons!" She showed the fusion card as she summoned Luster Dragon (Atk/1900 Def/1600) in defense position. "Now that the effect is complete, I activate Polymerization from my hand, fusing my Flamvell Dragon and Luster Dragon together to Fusion Summon First of Dragons in attack mode! (Atk/2700 Def/2000)". First of Dragons roared to life, his grey scales glistening in the street lamp light and his tail hitting the ground as he roared. Yuko smirked. "Now, First of Dragons, attack Horus the Black Flame Dragon Level 6!" Yuko ordered the attack, and watched as a black lightning ball left her dragon and hit her brother's dragon, destroying it and knocking Takano's life points down another 400 life points. Takano cried out in pain and once again struggled to maintain his balance as Yuko took the lead, easily turning around to face Takano and skate backwards. The ex Chaser growled and the smirk on her face. "Now, Keeper of Dragon Magic, it's your turn, attack Takano directly!" She extended her hand, making Takano's eyes widen as the Spellcaster attacked, knocking his Life Points down another 1800 points and causing Takano to falter once more." I set two cards facedown and end my turn!"
Yuko- 3600                                                 Takano-800
"You no good reject! You'll be locked up for sure! I draw!" Takano barely avoided another obstacle before drawing his next card, and a flash of red caught Yuko's attention. The Dragon Kings were nearby...
"Says the guy about to lose this duel! Make your last turn count, Takano!" Yuko fired back. Takano suddenly started laughing.
"I plan to! I use the effect of Monster Reborn to bring my Black Flame Dragon Level 6 back from the Graveyard! Next, I summon my Honest back to the field! But, instead of attacking, I'll set one card facedown and end my turn!" Wait, why isn't he attacking? Yuko thought. It didn't make any sense...
Yuko- 3600                                               Takano-800
"I draw!" Yuko announced her turn as she drew a card. "I summon Dark Blade in attack mode! (Atk/ 1800 Def/1500)" She smirked behind her helmet. "Dark Blade, attack and destroy his Honest!"
"Not so fast, I activate the trap card Rising Energy! By discarding my Two Headed Dragon, I can give my Honest an additional 1500 attack points! (Atk 1100+ 1500= 2600)."
"Nice try, but you forget about my facedown! Trap Jammer! Using this trap, I can negate and destroy Rising Energy!" 
"WHAT?!" Takano exclaimed in horror as he watched his trap crumble and shatter.
"And that means Dark Blade is clear to keep his attack going!" Yuko exclaimed. Dark Blade's sword slashes through the angel, making it give a cry as it shattered and Takano yell in pain as he took the 700 point damage. He stumbled, barely managing to catch his balance for the final time. "First of Dragons, let's finish him off once and for all! Attack his Black Flame Dragon and end this duel! Black Lightning Attack!" She yelled out, the dragon roaring as it fired off another ball of black lightning, once again destroying the Black Flame Dragon. Takano cried out as the last damage of the Derby Duel rendered him down to zero, taking his last 100 Life Points and making him finally fall as Yuko came to a stop, standing tall.
Yuko- 3600                                         Takano- 0
"Should have attacked while you had the chance." Yuko snarled. "Now, you're going to give me my brother's dragons back right now. All three of them. It's the rules of a Derby Duel. Any rare cards the losing duelist has go to the winner." Takano growled, the snarl eventually growing so loud it eventually became a roar of rage!
"NEVER, I'M TAKING YOU IN!" Takano yelled in anger, but before he could lay a hand on Yuko, a punch came from over the female's left shoulder. When Yuko turned her head, she had to admit that she was surprised to see Kai Cunningham behind her, along with the other members of the Dragon Kings.
"Not in our turf. She beat you fair and square, and you had some of the rarest dragons in the game since the creation of the Blue Eyes. You don't deserve to be a duelist." Kai threatened, scooping up the cards Yuko had requested from the deck and glaring at him. Yuko tensed, ready for a fight if that's what it came down to. "Relax, Adonis, and take off your helmet already, Yang wants to see you." Yuko hesitated for a minute. "Look, idiot, you want your brother's dragons back or not?" He questioned. Yuko pressed a button on the side of her helmet that made the skates and her helmet collapse, allowing her to walk freely. Kai placed the dragons in her hand before leading the way toward the Dragon Kings' hideout. Yuko placed the dragons in her deck, smiling when she heard their spirits purring on happiness. Once inside the hideout, Yuko saw that it was a den, filled with members of the Dragon Kings either training or cooking a hearty meal, the smell of which made Yuko's stomach rumble. "Being this close to an entrance of Cypher City has its perks." Kai told her as he held her to the center of the den. "We also have informants all over Cypher City, they keep us updated if anyone even murmurs about an attack on the Underground." The closer they got to the center of the den, the warmer it became. Yuko noticed many of the members of the rival duel gang stopping to stare at her. Kai glared at them once they reached a door, making all of them head back to their stations. "Yang's through here." Kai opened the door for her, letting her go through.
"Thanks." Yuko spoke. "For the backup back there and bringing me here." 
"Just following Boss's orders." Kai replied before closing the door behind her. When Yuko turned her back to the now closed door, she found a haven of an office. Books of Duel Monsters history lines the shelves, titles listing the pat Kings of Games, their rivals and the history of the fame itself. A picture frame sat center stage in the middle of it all, a picture of a young girl with snow white hair and sapphire blue eyes next to a younger and much happier Yang.
"My younger sister." Yang clarified from the desk in the center of the room before Yuko could ask, not glancing up from whatever he was working on. "The last time Cypher City tried a raid, my sister was coming up the stairs and was killed. We were able to fortify the passageway to not allow anyone but residents of the Underground in, but the update came too late to save her. Her name was Kisa, and no, I don't want to talk about her other than to make you understand why I don't mention her." Upon closer inspection, Yuko noticed a locket around both siblings neck in the picture, a locket that still hung around Yang's neck now despite the pain it must have brought him to remember his sister.
"We're similar that way, I guess." Yuko responded, remembering her own grief as Liam's face flashed in her mind. She heard Yang's chair scrape against the floor before the sound of his boots marked him drawing closer to her.
"Sometimes I wonder if you're just as crazy as your brother. Risking your neck to go up top, all to take part in some tournament that'll just be another blip in the history of Duel Monsters and end with your death." Yang told her, crossing his arms over his chest.
"I have to. Especially considering I have the chance to kickstart the chance for people to be able to duel freely." Yuko replied, facing her rival. He easily towered over her, his ruby red streaked, jet black hair hung in his face, his hazel eyes regarding her.
"You know they'll be able to keep track of you with your prosthetic, Yuko. You're not an idiot, don't do this over one stupid tournament."
"The gang and I thought of that, Raven was able to hack the systems so my ID shows as someone else rather than who I am, and it's also why my hair and eyes are a different color. I'm two steps ahead of you, as usual." Yuko turned to leave but found her arm in Yang's grasp.
"Yuko, please. One leader to another, don't go up there. You'll get caught, tortured and killed and your friends will be left down here alone." Yang reminded her of the punishments that waited for her if she were caught.
"And you know why I have to do this. Any day now, a piece of vital information could slip past your informants, Dracnus could lead an army down here and then Duel Monsters would be destroyed forever. That risk is why I have to fight back for us, because no one else will." She argued. Yang stared at her.
"I still think it's a stupid idea... But, nothing I say or do is going to change your mind, I've seen that look enough times to know. You die up there, I'll kill you." Yang let go, leading her to a bookcase that swung open when he pulled on a book titled An Incomplete History of Underground City and other Adrenaline Junkies. Yuko gave Yang a deadpan look.
"Cliche much?" She asked.
"Hey, it hides it better than an out of place stone tablet that's impossible to move." Yang replied. Yuko passed him to climb up the steps when a thought crossed her mind and she stopped, facing Yang.
"If something happens to me up there, will you make sure my gang stays safe?" She asked. Yang nodded.
"You have my word." He swore.
"Thanks... For everything." A smile crossed her face before she ascended the steps without looking back, the secret door swinging closed behind her. Her boots smacked against the cement stairs as she climbed higher and higher until she reached a heavy metal door. She touched the center of it, causing it to slide upward. Once she exited the staircase, the door slammed shut behind her. She was in someplace that looked like a normal apartment. It was abandoned, covered in dust and most of the furniture covered with a white cloth. Where she had just come from was behind a dusty old bookcase. Really? Just when I thought that guy couldn't be more cliche? She thought, shaking her head as she looked around. Since the applications didn't open back up again until the morning, Yuko set to work sorting out the apartment, dusting and cleaning until it looked almost like a new apartment. Once she finished, she looked out the window she had just finished dusting watching the stars glimmer in the sky above her. She gave a small smile, taking the stars as a sign of what she hoped would be a bright and peaceful future to come
But only time would tell for sure.
(Taglist: @kitsunephantom09 @iheartbarbie)
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