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vibrantbirdy · 10 months

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You are so incredibly talented! I love reading all of your works! : )

Could I request a Cal Kestis x female reader (or OC, no preference really). I’ve been super into the game recently and just love his character. Maybe a really strong female character, but she gets flustered by Cal’s confidence, and how much she has grown to like him more than friends. I totally see him being a complete flirt (but still sweet). Haha. I’ve always had this idea that it would be cool for a force user to show someone what it’s like by holding their hand and pulling something to them (like aiding them in using the force). Stupid maybe I don’t know lol, basically Cal being suave and laying it on thick. Fluff, crack, little spice, I’m here for whatever creative piece you get going ❤️

Firstly, thank you for your lovely words! Secondly, yay, Cal! Thank you, I'm glad someone's asked for Cal, this is a cute prompt.

Character x Reader requests are currently open in my Asks. Please read the guidelines first. Masterlist of my fics can be found here.

Title: Proximity Fandom: Star Wars Jedi Fallen Order/Survivor Games Setting: Prior to events of Jedi Survivor Genres: Sci-fi; Romance; Fluff - This is tooth-rotting fluff with a little added spice as requested ;) Warnings: This fic is 18+ so please heed and respect the adult rating. Descriptions of sexual longing/arousal; one scene of strong consensual sex - nothing too descriptive but probably on the borderline of (hopefully still sweet) mild smut. Pairing: Cal Kestis x Female Reader Chapters: 1/1 (Complete) Word Count: approx 5.5k (Because I have no self control) Summary: You are an accomplished Coruscanti thief who has been recruited by the Rebel Jedi, Cal Kestis. As you join him and his crew on their adventures aboard the Mantis, you and Cal have to navigate your growing feelings for each other.

You are standing in some Imperial-worshipping Senator's private vault in a bank nestled deep in the heart of Coruscant's palatial financial district. You've just located your prize - a data stick containing the names of high standing political and military figures within the Empire who have Republic, perhaps even Rebel leaning sympathies.

It's the Senator's insurance policy, his get out of jail free card - something he can produce at the eleventh hour in case his unwavering loyalty to the Empire turns out not to be enough to save him from the pull and push of the Imperial tide of oppression swelling across the Galaxy.

You'll sell the data stick to one Rebel faction or another, whoever is willing to pay most for your service in getting information out of Imperial hands and aiding the Rebel's recruitment drive in the process.

You're in the middle of internally congratulating yourself on successfully extracting the data stick from its complex security casing when a male voice, almost conversational in tone, rings out behind you.

"I can't let you leave with that."

Startled, you whirl around to see a man standing no more than a meter away from you. You wonder how long he's been there, watching you.

He has bright ginger hair which is swept back from his face, short at the back and sides, but longer on top and slightly ruffled. His matching red stubble sits on his cheeks, chin, upper-lip and travels up his well-defined jawline to his ears. He is dressed simply in a fawn shirt, dark grey pants, and sturdy brown boots.

A small red and white droid, bipedal, with a flat rectangular head and two photoreceptors, one slightly larger and beadier than the other, hangs almost casually off his shoulder like a pet. It's a BD unit, you think.

Both the man and the droid are rather dirty, but then, so are you after squeezing your way through a maze of dusty ventilation shafts. It makes sense the only possible way they could have gotten in here is the same way you did.

The stranger is holding something metal in his right hand that glints occasionally in the vault's dim security lighting, but you can't quite work out what it is. A weapon?

You raise your blaster.

"Don't!" he shouts, holding out a palm towards you, "The vault is magnetically sealed, if you miss, that bolt's going to cause us both a world of problems."

You raise an eyebrow because one, you already know that, and two...

"Bold of you to assume I'll miss at point blank range," you say levelly.

You keep your weapon trained steadily at the young man's chest.

He adjusts his grip on whatever it is he is holding and a green beam of light extends from the hilt of what you now realise is a lightsaber. A deep thrumming sound resonates around the small chamber.

A Jedi. Great.

You thought they were all extinct after the Emperor's purge. Briefly, childhood memories of evening strolls with your parents past the monumental ziggurat of the Jedi temple glowing golden in the low Coruscanti sun flash through your mind. You remember the thrill of excitement at seeing the Jedi, elegant and regal in their grand robes, lightsabers clinking at their belts as they swept by on important Republic business.

Right now? Here? This is the last place you want to see one.

The light from the blade illuminates the young man's face which, you have to admit, is a rather attractive combination of youthful and rugged. His nose and cheeks are peppered with freckles and his eyes contain green irises so deep in colour that they almost match his blade. A thin, red scar runs almost horizontally across the bridge of his nose, dipping down onto his right cheek. The ghost of a smirk is now playing on his lips and it has the irritating effect of making him more handsome.

You don't know why, but for some reason, you trust him instinctively not to try and cut you in half with that humming beam of hot, vibrating energy. At a stalemate, you lower your blaster. He follows your lead by deactivating the blade of his saber immediately.

"If you make me a good offer, you can have this right now," you say, one hand on your hip, the other waving the data stick in front of him impatiently.

You never like staying on the scene of a job too long and you are starting to feel on edge.

"I've got ... uhhh ... one hundred credits?"

He rubs the back of his neck awkwardly as he speaks. He knows it's a stupidly lowball offer and you scoff loudly to let him know you think so too.

"Look, I know the ISB would pay a lot for information like this but..."

"I don't sell to the Empire," you snarl, cutting him off.

He holds up his hands in a gesture of apology which seems genuine enough. He tries again.

"I really need to get this to a contact in the Mid Rim..."

"The Mid Rim?" you interrupt abruptly, "that's off-world."

"Yeah..." his brow furrows and a slow, quizzical smile spreads across his face at the obviousness of your statement.

You curse yourself for being as predictable as a cheap holo novel. All your life you've lived on Coruscant. You've never been anywhere else. These days, the endless maze of unnatural, lifeless spires and struts and blocks of artificial construction seem to press in and in and in on you so that, despite the sprawling size of the metropolis, it feels like you are living in a tiny metal cage.

Still, this stranger didn't need to know that, and you realise you've given him his angle - a bargaining chip.

"I can't buy it off you," he reasons, "I don't have the credits, but I do have a proposal. Work with me and my crew. It's regular and we're rarely on one world for too long..."

There it is...

You got in here," he continues, gesturing around the vault, "we could use someone with your skill set. And, you get to piss off the Empire in the process."

You consider his offer. You are used to working alone and you don't like the complications that come with relying on others. Trusting anyone is difficult after fending for yourself, all alone, so successfully and for so long....

But with the Empire continuing to close their fist around all aspects of daily life, work was difficult to come by on Coruscant these days. Thieving in the city from Imperial targets in particular was becoming more and more fraught with danger.

While it riled you that he was able to read you so easily, really, what did you have to lose? Because by the Force did you not want to get off Coruscant? Isn't this what you'd been waiting for your whole life? An adventure?

"One job," you counter pragmatically, extending your hand to shake his, "And we'll see how it goes from there."

"Cal Kestis," he introduces himself with a disarmingly friendly smile, "And deal."

*************************************************

One job turns into another then another and another. Weeks turn into months and soon you've been on Cal's ship - well, borrowed ship you had come to learn - the Mantis for nearly half a year.

You've grown close with the crew of the Mantis. Cal, Gabs, Bravo and the two hulking Klatooinine twins, Lizz and Koob. This type of camaraderie is new to you. You really thought you'd struggle with it, that your independent nature would rail against the confines of living in close quarters with ship mates and fitting your own whims and desires and wants around others. In reality, you've never felt more at home. You didn't realise how lonely you had become before.

And the missions you run with the crew are exhilarating. This new life is so much more than just pilfering here and there from the Empire. You feel like you are really making a difference, like you're spitting directly in the face of the Imperial machine with every job. You feel like a Rebel.

It's not all sabotage and espionage and fighting Stormtroopers though. Off duty, life on the Mantis is mainly based around friendly joshing and winding each other up. And the dull minutiae of life still goes on.

Like now.

You and Cal are patching up the Mantis while the others are out on a supply run. You are currently crouched on your haunches so that the service hatch you are examining on one of the walls inside the ship is at eye level.

Cal is stood behind you, arms folded across his chest. You've been arguing good naturedly about what the problem is with the engine cooling system for an hour and you are now impatiently waiting for BD-1 to finish his scan to find out which one of you is right.

The little droid crawls out from the tangle of wires and gives you little nod and a boop of approval. You pat BD on his rectangular head and he scurries up your arm and on to your shoulder.

"I told you that was the problem," you say, craning your neck to look up at Cal with a triumphant grin.

You gesture to the wiring tool in his hand.

"Give that to me, I'll do it."

The Jedi looks down at the small instrument in his hand then tosses it up in the air and catches it again. He has that mischievous look on his face, the one you've learned to recognise as a sign that he's about to do something really annoying.

"Kestis..." you warn standing up, unable to stop your lips curling into a smile.

You make a lunge for the tool in his hand, but he's too quick. In a flash, he's holding it up above his head. Cal is almost a head taller than you and there's no way you can reach that high, even when you stretch up onto your tiptoes.

Instead, you decide to play dirty. You jab him hard in both his sides with your fingers where you know he's ticklish. He makes a funny sort of snorting noise in surprise and his hand drops for long enough that you manage to snatch the tool from him and make off with it at great speed.

Cal darts after you, both of you careering in to the kitchen of the Mantis, the thud and scrape of your boots on the ship's durasteel grated floor ringing throughout the ship in chorus with your laughter.

BD-1 takes this opportunity to leap of your shoulder and onto the kitchen table with an indignant whirr, determined not to get involved in this organic tomfoolery.

Cal is on you in seconds. He grabs you around the middle and lifts you off the ground with ease, spinning you around and deliberately tickling you in between making grabs for the wiring tool.

You squeal and let out perhaps the most ridiculous giggle to ever escape your mouth. You can't let him get away with forcing you to make a noise like that so you elbow him in the stomach. It's only a gentle prod really, but it's enough to make him grunt and let go of you.

As Cal doubles over, winded, you sprint back around to the opposite side of kitchen table holding the instrument aloft and performing a little victory dance.

Across the table, Cal straightens and, with a cocky look on his face, he stretches his arm out towards you. You stumble forwards slightly as if pulled forwards by an invisible rope tied around your wrist as he uses the Force to tear the tool easily out of your hand and bring it flying through the air to rest in his own outstretched palm.

"That's cheating!" you say, breathlessly.

Despite your half-hearted admonishment, in reality, you're delighted. And you're certain Cal knows it. The more time you spend with him, the more that old fascination you held as a child with the strange powers of the Jedi has returned. You are always enchanted by Cal's displays of Force ability.

"Alright kids, we almost ready to go?" Gabs' voice echoing through from the Mantis' doorway signals the return of the others.

Cal shrugs at you and you both grin, panting from your exertions. Keeping his green eyes locked on yours, he backs casually towards the door to help Gabs and the others load up the supply crates. Just before he exits the ship, he tosses the wiring tool to you underarm and you catch it with an elaborate flourish and twirl that makes him laugh.

You return to your work fixing the Mantis's cooling system with BD-1. You try to concentrate, but you feel slightly giddy. You can still feel Cal's strong arms against your body as if they remain wrapped around you. His masculine scent, pleasant and earthy and fresh like petrichor, seems to linger in your proximity and on your skin.

BD-1 tries his best to keep you right. He trills or nudges you every so often either to correct your wiring or to encourage you to stop staring into space with that inane, absent-minded smile.

When you lie in your cot bed that night, the hum of the Mantis' hyperdrive lulls you into a comfortable drowsiness and your thoughts return, unbidden, to Cal.

Over the past few months, it's like the very idea of him nestled deep into your brain and now refuses to budge. Every morning when you wake, you look forward to the sight of his honest, open, expressive face. The warmth of his slightly crooked smile. The way his red brows arch when he finds something funny before he squeezes his eyes shut so tight that they crinkle at the corners as he throws back his head, letting out peels of joyful, open-mouthed laughter.

Even when he has those strange moments of quiet introspection which you don't quite understand yet, you find it hard not to watch him. You can't help it, even although you sometimes feel like you are intruding on a private, sacred moment of reflection. It's always the same. His eyes glaze over as he stares out into the distance at nothing, a muscle works in his chiselled jaw, and then his head drops as if in dignified, melancholic prayer. These periods never last too long - not when he has a crew to lead.

There's no point in denying it anymore, at least not to yourself anyway. Your feelings for Cal go beyond comradeship; beyond friendship. And a hopeful notion has formed in your head that he might actually feel the same way about you.

It's both frightening and exhilarating at the same time.

A sudden heat blooms deep within your very core and rises in your cheeks as your mind conjures the image, no, the feeling of Cal's solid, toned body, pressed against yours in a feverish, impassioned embrace, your limbs entwined, fingers woven tightly through the flames of his red hair

Force, you want him.

You place a palm against the cool durasteel wall above your head that separates your room from the Jedi's. You wonder what he's thinking of on the other side of the thin sheet of metal.

****************************************

Cal Kestis can't sleep. Like most Jedi, he can't actually read the thoughts of others, but his connection to the Force allows him to feel the emotions and state of mind of those around him.

Over the past few months, the Jedi has noticed your feelings for him blossoming into something more than friendship, mirroring the growth of his own affections for you.

But tonight, Cal can sense that something in your emotional frequency has changed. Evolved. A clarity, a new and vigorous and glorious certainty in your desire for him radiates incandescent through the Force. It's like the smouldering embers of a fire have ignited into a ferocious blaze.

As the feeling permeates through the thin sheet-metal wall dividing you, the intensity of it, the heat of it, drives him crazy. He wants to rip through the flimsy partition separating you and give you everything you want from him and more. His whole body is aflame with almost painful arousal and he is aching to bring himself release.

Cal resists, teetering on the very edge of giving himself over to his desire. Is this voyeuristic? Is he trespassing? Crossing some unspoken line? Should he be trying to block you out? He doesn't know.

The Jedi hisses through his teeth in frustration. Reluctantly, he rolls out of bed and, sinking to his knees on the floor, surrenders himself to the Force in search of whatever temporary solace he can find in meditation.

Even as he does so, he knows that the only real relief he'll be able to get now is if he can find it with you.

***************************************

The crew of the Mantis are taking some time to rest after a run of particularly eventful jobs. You've landed on the quiet world of Brax at the edge of the Mid Rim. It's a beautiful, lush planet adorned with meadows of wildflowers, glassy lakes and sprawling coniferous forests.

Everyone is making the most of their down time.

Gabs and Bravo have gone off for a hike in the nearby woods.

BD-1 is having a well earned oil bath on the Mantis.

The twins are snoozing in the meadow amongst the flowers. When you'd crept past them earlier, you'd smiled fondly - the peaceful serenity on their faces was such an odd juxtaposition to their usual chaotic enthusiasm for life.

Having successfully sneaked past Lizz and Koob without waking them, you are now sitting atop a large slab of rock which juts up and out of the meadow. You alternate between admiring the view of the lake and cleaning your blaster.

It is a warm day, but a gentle cooling breeze keeps the heat at bay. A gust suddenly whips up the heady, sweet smell of wildflowers all around you. For some reason the scent triggers something inside you, your heart suddenly full to bursting with a strange concoction of melancholy and joy.

To think that all this beauty, all this Galaxy was just out here, waiting, your whole life. And if you'd never met Cal, you might still be crawling through filthy ventilation shafts smelling of metal and damp and darkness just to get by on Coruscant.

You are just about ready to reassemble your weapon when you look up from your task towards where the Jedi is meditating with his back to you. He's kneeling a few meters in front of you on the sandy shore by the still water. You always think it's strange how he chooses to sit on his knees, rather than cross-legged. It looks uncomfortable to you, but he seems to be able to sit like that for anywhere up to an hour. Maybe you'll ask him about it one day.

Cal is shirtless. Even from here, you can see the freckles littered like celestial constellations across his strong back and down his broad shoulders and muscled arms. You take the opportunity to admire the outlines and angles of his taut, athletic body.

You start as the Jedi begins to stand. You'd rather not get caught staring at him quite so openly and you quickly shift your gaze back to your blaster which is still in its various component parts.

Cal turns and advances towards you up the beach and onto the grassy meadow. You pretend not to have noticed him at all, but you keep catching glimpses of him in your peripheral vision. He walks a few paces, then stops and looks around as if he's searching for something on the ground. Then he crouches down. He does this several times.

What is he up to?

"Hey," Cal says casually as he finally wanders over to you.

He has to crane his neck to speak to you, perched as you are on top of your rock, and use a hand to shield his eyes from the sun. He's hiding something behind his back you realise.

"Oh, hey," you reply, as if you're surprised to see him there.

He pulls his hand from behind his back and reaches up to you. In his grasp is a bunch of wildflowers, beautiful pastel blues and pinks and purples.

You exclaim softly in surprise, a rather giddy sound that makes Cal beam up at you. As you take the blooms from him, his fingertips, calloused and tough from years of wielding a weapon in combat, brush gently against your hand. Even that small touch feels like a spark of electricity arching between you.

"See you at dinner," he says, and he's clearly pleased with himself as he retreats towards the Mantis, head held high, a jaunt in his step.

As you twist in your seated position to watch him disappear into the ship, you realise you were so enchanted by the gesture that you forgot to say thank you.

That's the thing about Cal Kestis. He's completely disarming. He has a rare, effortless charisma and an easy, flirtatious way about him that is somehow both sweet and suave at the same time. Few men you've met have ever managed to render you so flustered.

You look down at the delicate blooms in your hand and bring them to your nose, inhaling their fresh scent. Smiling to yourself, you shake loose the functional way you usually wear your hair to keep it out of your face and retie it, carefully weaving the wildflowers that Cal has picked for you through your locks.

When you come in for dinner - Bravo's turn to cook - Cal is already sitting at the kitchen table. He looks up and inclines his head to the side as he takes you in, his eyes widening. You blush furiously to see the genuine pleasure at the sight of you and your decorated hair written so openly on his face.

Amid the usual convivial hubbub and chaos of dinner in the Mantis' kitchen, you and Cal steal glances at each other across the table.

**********************************************

That evening, the moon is low and yellow in Brax's dark sky, hanging like a ball of golden light above the lake. You have an hour or so before you all depart for a rendezvous with a contact on Naboo. It's the twins' turn to do pre-flight checks and you find yourself on the shores of the water, skimming stones with Cal to kill time.

Before joining the crew of the Mantis you'd never skimmed a stone in your life. Not many places to do that on Coruscant. But Gabs in particular is an ace at it and she's taught you well.

Cal spots a likely candidate for his next projectile and he brings it flying casually into his hand using his Jedi abilities.

"What does it feel like like?" You ask, suddenly.

Cal smiles at you, seemingly understanding that you are talking about the Force. He hesitates for a second, looking down at the stone in his open palm. Then he places it back on the ground in an obvious position, nestled in the sand a few feet in front of you, and moves round to stand behind you.

He's so close you can feel his heart beating against his chest. Instinctively, you lean back into him, enjoying the safe feeling that his nearness gives you, and the warmth of his body against yours in the chill night air.

"It's time for instruction," he says softly.

He's said that phrase before when he's showing anyone how to do something new. You've come to understand that it's a fond impression of his late Master's dignified voice - a touching habit you've always thought.

Tonight it sounds different. His tone is light and teasing, but the smirk you can hear as he speaks makes the words sound almost seductive in a way that causes something to flip then tighten in the pit of your abdomen.

"Hold out your hand."

You extend your right arm, holding your palm outwards as you've seen Cal do many times. He places his own palm against the back of your hand and interlocks his fingers with yours.

His other hand comes to rest at your waist, pulling you ever so slightly closer into him. He doesn't need to put it there and you both know it. Nor does he need to rest his chin on your left shoulder, so close to your cheek that his stubble almost tickles your skin.

Yet you can tell that you are both revelling in this rare, private opportunity for proximity between the two of you, and it is as thrilling as it is maddening.

"Focus. Breathe."

You realise you've been holding your breath. You feel Cal's chest rising and falling against your back and you match your own breathing in time with his. You can't help but notice it's at a slightly elevated pace.

"See the stone in your hand."

You nod and exhale, your eyes boring into the rock as if you really are going to levitate it yourself. You try and fail to stifle a sudden giggle at the ridiculousness of such an idea.

"Concentrate," Cal scolds quietly in your ear but you can hear the smile in his voice as the hand round your waist tightens its grip ever so slightly.

"I am," you mutter, but it's only half true.

You wonder if it's just your imagination, but in the seconds that follow, you think you can feel an deep, vibration flowing through Cal and passing through his body and into yours, binding your lifeforces together.

The rock flies so suddenly into your palm that you jump. You just about remember to close your fingers around the stone's cool, smooth surface as you shout out in surprise and delight. Cal lets out a good-natured laugh at your reaction and you glow as it rumbles through his whole body and yours.

You've just made up your mind to twist around in his arms kiss him when BD-1 comes running through the grass at great speed on his little legs, beeping and chirping urgently.

"Ok buddy, ok, we're coming," Cal says kindly to the little droid, but you can hear the exasperation at the untimely interruption in his voice.

*******************************************

Course set, the Mantis is travelling at lightspeed and, nestled safely in the cradle of the hyperlane, you will probably make it to Naboo in about six hours.

You suspect the rest of the crew are all sleeping soundly. The Mantis takes care of herself for the most part when travelling through hyperspace. With the life you lead, the importance of catching rest when you can cannot be underestimated.

You, however, cannot sleep. Thoughts of Cal and your interrupted moment by the lake race through your mind. The wildflowers he gave you are still in your hair and every so often you catch the ghost of their aroma, reminding you of your almost idyllic day on Brax.

You sigh and drag yourself out of bed, deciding to go and sit in the empty cockpit of the Mantis for a while and watch the stars race by as you hurtle through the hyperlane. Although it should really be frightening, you love to watch great swathes of the Galaxy disappear in a flash before your eyes as the Mantis catapults through space. It's a novel experience for you still - being off Coruscant, light speed travel, new worlds.

You wave your hand over the control and the door to your room hisses open. You jump to see a figure already standing there in the corridor. With a jolt of excitement, and with a strange feeling that you've summoned him somehow, you realise that it's Cal.

"Uh, hi.."

You don't let him get more than two words into his sentence. You grab him roughly by the front of his loose night shirt - which is slung low, revealing tufts of ginger hair on his chest and the elegant lines of his collarbone - and pull him into a deep kiss.

Not breaking away from your lips, and hardly hesitating, he picks you with almost alarming ease. You wrap your legs around his waist and curl your fingers in his red hair as he carries you back into your quarters. He places you up onto your workbench situated against the opposite wall as the door slides closed behind you.

"You look so pretty with those flowers in your hair," he mumbles into your neck you shiver with pleasure as his mouth brushes against your skin as he talks.

"Yes, it's a shame you're about to make such a mess of me," you whisper into his ear.

He pulls back to stare at you for a moment, green eyes wide as if dumbfounded by your forwardness. His delighted, slack-jawed expression forces a loud giggle from deep within you.

"Shhh," Cal warns emphatically, keenly aware of the proximity of the rest of the crew and how thin the walls of the Mantis are. He presses a kiss to your mouth in an attempt to silence your outburst, but you can feel his body shake with his own barely contained laughter as he grins against your lips.

Once your stifled mirth subsides, you hastily start to undress each other. You barely have time to appreciate the now naked, muscular form of the Jedi before you, when, in his enthusiasm to remove it, Cal accidentally rips your flimsy night dress away from your body. As it comes apart in his hands, the fabric makes a loud tearing sound, louder even perhaps than that of your previous bouts of laughter. You both freeze, as if anticipating someone will burst through the door and catch you in this compromising position, before dissolving into poorly restrained giggles again.

As he drinks in the sight of your body, Cal's expression changes into something primal. His brows knit together as if he is trying to understand how you could possibly be sitting in front of him like this. Then, his pupils dilate and his nostrils flare before he crashes his mouth back down on to yours into a deliciously rough kiss.

You don't move from your position on your workbench, and you coil your legs around Cal as tight as you can as he starts to move in you. The pace is urgent. You don't mind. There'll be opportunities for languid and gentle love-making in the future. Right now, this is a matter of need for both of you. The cord of tension that has been tightening between you for months finally snapping in a glorious, frenzied, explosion of mutual lust.

As his pace increases and his movements start to become uncoordinated, Cal moves a hand down between your bodies, splaying his palm against you, and settling the pad of his thumb between your legs at the very place you most need it to be.

At this, your hand which was tangled in his flaming hair flies down to join the other at his back and he growls as you claw your fingers in to his flesh between his shoulder blades.

You press your lips hard into his shoulder to muffle your cries as you approach your peak and then, suddenly, you are crashing over the edge and seeing stars. You gasp out his name, over and over, open mouthed and breathy against his ear.

This, combined with the sensation of your body in rapture, sends Cal hurtling towards his own oblivion. You cling to him while the great, strong muscles all over his body tense and release, and he lets out a long, shuddering groan into your neck that is almost a whimper.

The sight of him, the sound of him falling apart in front of you is beautiful.

Once you've both caught your breath, Cal lifts you gently off the table, and carries you to your tiny, single cot bed. You manage to position yourselves fairly comfortably in the snug space by lying on your sides. The Jedi has one arm laced underneath you with the other slung over your waist, hand resting on your stomach and holding you close to his warm chest.

As you are lulled almost into a doze by the sound and feel of his slow and steady heartbeat, you take in the rather sorry sight of the flowers which once bejewelled your hair, now scattered in ruin across the functional durasteel floor.

"I told you those flowers wouldn't last," you muse drowsily.

Propping himself up on one elbow, Cal removes his hand from your waist and reaches out his arm, palm splayed open. A blue bell flower, stem and petals astonishingly still intact- a brave survivor of the onslaught of urgent hands through your hair - floats lazily up from the floor and towards you on the bed.

Cal plucks it out of the air and gently weaves the bloom into your locks just above your ear. Then, he kisses you gently on the cheek and then on your shoulder, his beard tickling your skin, before sinking back down on to his side and resuming his previous position curled comfortingly around you.

For some reason, despite the eroticism of what you've just done together, this sweet gesture makes you flush disproportionately and you feel your cheeks turning pink.

You're starting to realise, perhaps hope, that the heady feeling of being slightly flustered in Cal Kestis' proximity might never go away.

#cal kestis x reader #cal kestis fanfiction #cal kestis x you #cal kestis x female reader

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h-harleybaby · 1 year

Note

ON IT BOSS !!!

Anyways Elf King Kyle x Human Princess Reader

I love forbidden love tropes,,

-men kisser anon

Ugh yes

I love that it’s perfect <3333

I love forbidden love too but I’ve never really written it so I’ll try my best!

Elf King Kyle x Human Princess reader

• At first, Elf King Kyle saw you as nothing more than a pawn to help get the stick of truth but over time he had developed feelings for you

• When he realized he had a crush he wanted to cry

• Like, he KNEW that you guys could never be together (in game) because he's the elf king and he declared war against the humans

• He lost elves for gods sake he was too far deep, he couldn't just call off war!

• One day some rumors had surfaced that the princess had a crush on him so Kyle sent one of his most trusted knights (Stan) with a letter of his to your balcony at night

• He actually had to bribe Stan with 10 dollars to do it, HE WANTED TO KIND OF BE ROMANTIC BUT HE ALSO NEEDED TO BE SECRETIVE

• Stan literally went to your window at midnight and started throwing rocks at it till you came out, then he threw another rock once you came out with the letter attached to it

• "Hey! Whore!! The Elf King writes this letter for you and sends you his regards" "Why couldn't he come himself? Or literally just tell me in person???" "His brother, the pirate, said that he snuck out again he would tell the royal family"

• Kyle tried making the letter as pretty and sophisticated as he could but most of the writing was hasty scribbles he had to write over and over again because he kept changing the wording

• The gist of it was that if the rumors he heard were true, to meet him alone at stark's pond in a couple days at the stroke of midnight (Kyle had to bribe Ike with candy or something so he could sneak out) and that he would only wait an hour

• Of course it was true but you couldn't meet him, you would never be able to sneak out without your parents knowing or Cartman catching you, so you never met him at stark's pond

• Elf King Kyle was heartbroken because he had fallen for you so hard, he even set up a picnic blanket and candles with chocolate and flowers so he could confess 😭

• But Kyle was determined, he will win you over and one day ask you out! Maybe this time without him having to send a letter through Stan

• It didn't take much to win you over considering he already had but within a couple of private meetings between the two of you (essentially dates) y'all had started dating in private

• It was pretty romantic tbh, a little annoying because you guys would always have to do something at night or at times there was absolutely no way that anyone on either side could catch you guys together

• But Kyle more than makes up for it when you guys go on dates, he always puts so much thought and effort into it. Like when he climbed your balcony to leave you a letter that said to meet him at the elf kingdom

• You know that huge tree house next to his throne? He set up fairy lights, blankets, and pillows up there for you guys. He was waiting up there and you guys had food Kyle had cooked earlier and watched the stars together, cuddling

• Your relationship was like that for a while, kept a secret while you guys exchanged lovestruck glances from your respective sides on the battlefield

• Many on both sides had suspected and feared something was going on between y'all, so the elves had taken it upon themselves to kidnap you (without Elf King Kyle's orders) on multiple separate occasions

• One time they brought you in front of him to see his reaction, ofc he got mad and demanded that they untie you because not only did he not order them to do that, he was not a barbarian god damn it! Another time they kidnapped you and interrogated you, it was somewhat lighthearted tho because they were asking how you felt about the elf king and nature of the relationship

• Princess Kenny definitely questioned you a lot about Kyle too, she was so desperate to know and you know what? She supported you guys, she thought it was adorable!

• Maybe one day, whenever the war is over between Kupa Keep and the Elf Kingdom you guys could tell everyone of your secret relationship and you guys could unite the kingdoms

• He definitely wouldn't mind you being his elf queen, it's not like he hasn't referred to you as that in his head/when he's alone and talking to himself

• But alas, that will be far in the future so your meetings will stay during moonlight nights and on opposites of the battlefield

• Kyle won't complain tho, it gives him more opportunities to be the hopeless romantic he is

#south park x reader #h harleybaby needs help #south park x reader headcanons #harley’s anons <33 #south park x y/n #kyle x reader #kyle broflovski x reader #kyle broflovski x y/n #high elf king kyle #elf king Kyle x reader #elf king kyle broflovski x reader #stick of truth x reader #Harley’s favs #harley’s requests!

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dragonrider9905 · 20 days

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Celebrating You!

Hi guys! I’ve been on here for a bit now and while I never had a follower goal, I do appreciate you guys who have decided to follow me! So now I’d like to celebrate you!

In light of TBB ending, and how much we'll be missing the boys, I thought this was as good as a time as ever!

Here’s the idea! I’m opening a prompt request for the dates of April 5th through May 5th, 2024 (you may start submitting now though!) and choose from the prompts below! You can choose one from each category, or just one category. It’s ok if it is just the prompt or the prompt and a brief idea. If you have a fun idea or prompt not listed, please share!

Rules: I only write SFW. I typically write for clones; I reserve the right to refuse requests which make me uncomfortable for whatever reason. I have had a few requests in the past that really unsettled me for various reasons. Or if I don't know the character. I'd hate to try to write something then upset the person because it is so ooc that it's cringy. (But if I said I would write your request and haven't yet, I just honestly haven't gotten to it :D I like to do well on the stories you guys entrust to me so it does take me a bit :D)

This is supposed to be fun so lets keep it fun!

You may submit as many requests as you'd like! The more the merrier!

Characters: Star Wars Clone Wars or The Bad Batch (as long as I know them. I know a lot of clones but alas, not all.)

Story genre:

Classic SW! (Pick an era if they exist in more than one if you wish)

AU of choice (modern, western, pirate, mermaid, time traveling, etc if I’m unfamiliar with the genre, I may have to change it or request more details)

Dialogue Prompts:

“Don’t go where I can’t follow.”

“If we’re going to do this we’ll need—“ “A plan?” “No! Code names! Cool ones!”

“I don’t need to be anything to you. I just want my life to mean more to you than my death.”

“You are playing a dangerous game without even a glimpse of the rule book.”

“I’ve never been terrified of death, til he set his sights on you.”

“What the hell are you doing here?” “Yeah, you’re not allowed to ask that in this situation.”

“Where’s your shoe?” “The giant mud puddle in the road demanded a sacrifice.”

“Love at first sight doesn’t exist.” “Then how else do I describe the feeling I got when I first saw you?” “You…love me?” “Apparently not, according to you.”

“A fate worse than death….” “They’re burnt cupcakes.”

“White paint has more color than your face.”

“Why is there a dragon in my fridge?” “It was hot.”

“Touch **, and you’re dead.”

“I am the law.”

“Do that again and I’ll throw you out the window. Wait, what are you doing?” “Checking how high the drop is; seeing if it’s worth it.”

“I’d rather have you hate me than loose you entirely.”

“I have a mission but don’t know what it is.” “Well that sounds incredibly counterproductive.”

“I would like to join you in acknowledging the difficulties in your life.” “You are the worst at this comforting thing.”

“I don’t know if you’re aware of this but I’m quite petite.” “Really? I had no idea in our twelve years of friendship that you’re shorter than I am.”

“But what is power?” “Loyalty.”

“Don’t you sign to me in that tone.”

“I’m with him/her for better or worse.” “It’ll probably be worse.” “I knew that the day I met him/her.”

"I'm sorry I tried to kill you." "It's fine, but next time you should try harder."

"C'mon, like I need an excuse to spend time with you."

"You're not as bad as everyone says you are."

"The only one who gets to kill you is me."

“blood loss”? well it’s not lost. I know exactly where it went. right over there.”

“How the mighty have fallen!” “It’s a dropped chocolate bar, stop being dramatic.”

“Shit, we’re gonna die” “Now I don’t want to hear that negative attitude, look on the bright side!” “Yay! We’re gonna die! Woo!”

“How do you do it?” “How do I do what?” “Pretend you are ok.” “I’m not pretending.” “Yes, you are. Every single day and it breaks my heart.”

“Hey, so I know things are pretty f**** shitty right now but I need you to breathe for me.” “Wha-wh-wh-” “You’re having a panic attack. It’s gonna be ok. Just breathe with me.”

“Please, my arms—I can’t wipe my tears, don’t let them see!”

"Smiles are contagious!" "Don't worry, I'm vaccinated."

"I don't want to get involved, it's too risky." "Please do it for me, you're the only one I can turn to." "It's not worth it. You really want to lose everything? 'cause I don't."

"Do you ever think of anyone other than yourself?" "No"---a long pause---"actually yes, at Christmas time"

"There is a reason I go through that door first, It's to make sure everyone else walks back out"

“I can’t leave you here!” “You can and you will.”

"OH! Are you alright? Are you alright?" "Apart from being trapped under here, and maybe suffering from broken bones and embarrassment beyond what I am capable of handling. . . I'm dandy, why do you ask?"

Oh no, are you alright? You're covered in blood!" "Yes, it's yours, Now will you please let me take you to the hospital?"

"What did love ever do anything for anyone anyway?"

"What the hell were you even thinking?!" "You told me not to think!"

"With love comes loss, that's part of the deal. Sometimes it hurts, but in the end, it was all worth it. There's no greater gift than love."

“'Temporary stitches' all stitches are temporary if you have a pair of scissors and aren’t a coward" "What do you....that better not mean what I think you mean......" "Am I just talking about sewing stitches or sutures too? Maaayyybe?" "NO! Absolutely not!"

"I made the calculations, and boy am I bad at math."

"It'll be over soon, I promise."

"Working together again, just like old times." "Well, not just like old times."

"I am many things but not your enemy."

Action Prompts:

Forehead kisses

Palm/hand kisses

Dramatic rain scene

Touching foreheads

Jealousy

Dancing

Last stand

Christmas/Life Day celebration

mistletoe

Accidental hand touch

First date

First kiss

Spending time with the family

Bad day cheering up scheme

Pranks

Going to a pet shop

Going to the movies

Always go after the girl

soft spoken person has loud, unnerving scream.

Lullabies

Nightmares

injury

amnesia

pretend/mistaken to be married/in a relationship

cooking

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captainkirkk · 11 months

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✩ WEEKLY FIC ROUND-UP ✩

All the fics I’ve read and really enjoyed in the past week-ish. Reminder: This list features any and all ratings and themes. Please look at tags and warnings on ao3 before reading.

my dearly departed by redrobin1989

Kon heard the stories about how Tim had fallen apart after he died. He couldn’t imagine what Tim had gone through, what he’d been feeling. Even now, with the shoe now on the other foot, Conner doesn’t know how to cope. Especially when he needs to keep his boyfriend’s collapsing family together.

Exit Strategy by smilebackwards

Batman needs a Robin and Batman has a Robin. Tim is just extraneous now, vestigial. He’s a bandage over a healed wound. He doesn’t know what he’s hanging on to.

Or: Tim didn’t expect his exit strategy from the Batfamily to involve quite so much bonding time with Damian over Wayne Enterprises bureaucracy.

the capillaries in my eyes are bursting by Scarlet_Ribbons

Bruce grunts, standing up. “Jenkins said the same. What about what you weren’t told?”

And without dissembling, Jason says, “I think they fucked that kid up, B.”

[Jack and Janet die. As things get weirder and weirder, it feels like Tim might be at the center of the unfolding conspiracy.]

Stranger Things

and i know that you don’t, but if i ask you if you love me— by fakecharliebrown

Once, only a few weeks before his parents decide he’s too old to be tucked into bed at night, Steve grabs his mother by the wrist and asks, “Does Father love me?”

“Of course he does,” she says immediately, smoothing the blanket where it rests over his chest.

Steve blinks up at her. “Then how come he never says it?”

She purses her lips. “He shouldn’t have to, sweetheart. You should just know.”

(It isn’t until years down the line that Steve realizes she’d somehow turned that into being his fault.)

or; Steve Harrington through the years, on loving and being loved.

Percy Jackson

percy jackson and the scrutiny of his coworkers by pqrker

Jim turned back to the tank and looked at Marcie the seal, who was now staring at the spot his coworker had been standing just moments before with that same strange look of reverence in her eyes.

Percy Jackson truly was the oddest person Jim Elpool had ever worked with.

Or: 5 times percy's coworkers were confounded by his fish magic, plus 1 time they try to figure it out.

Star Wars

Bounty by smilebackwards

"You took a puck for Luke Skywalker?”

Din looks up at the tenseness in Cara’s voice.

“Yes?” The puck for Skywalker had been passed over by half a dozen hunters, surprising considering the price on his head, but Din had assumed that was because his last known location was Coruscant. The Core is a dangerous place to hunt bounties.

“If I didn’t consider you a friend,” Cara says, with a tone that sounds like she’s reconsidering it, “I’d shoot you where you stand for admitting that."

SVSSS

What Is Seen by CaveteDracones

....is not [always] the real truth.

Truth-compelling artifacts in the hands of an enemy to one side, SYSTEM-mandated silence on the other, and Shen Qingqiu caught between the two. Is it too late to go back to the Water Prison?

and judgment is just like a cup that we share by Kieron_ODuibhir

The blob finished rotating into place in a way that wasn’t quite compatible with geometry as Shen Qingqiu understood it, and cleared a throat it didn’t seem to have.

“Greetings,” it said, somehow clearly addressing him in particular more than the room as a whole despite its total lack of features other than blueness and translucency. “I’m here on behalf of the Hyper-Celestial Peace and Order Enforcement Bureau. Crime scene secure, proceeding to interviews. Beginning with Subject One: You are Shen Qingqiu, formerly Shen Yuan, also known as Peerless Cucumber?"

#happy monday everyone #i'm so exhausted i made this list with my eyes half closed #my posts #weekly fic round up #fic recs #svsss recs #sw recs #pjo recs #dc recs #stranger things recs

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himboskywalker · 4 months

Note

Heyy boo, do you have a book that is not star wars related that you wish you could read for the first time or reread all the time?

I am searching for books recommendations and I am pretty open about every genre, maybe not horror but everything else is totally fine.

My number one book recommendation that I will always obnoxiously shove in everyone’s faces is Lord of the Rings. It is my heart and soul and favorite thing in the world and if you’ve never read the trilogy I highly recommend it. But I also have quite a few other recs!

Anything written by Andy Weir. “The Martian” is his best known work,which they made the Matt Damon movie of,and while I do love it “Project Hail Mary” is my favorite of his and one of my favorite sci-fi books of all time.

I loved “To Sleep in a Sea of Stars” which was Christopher Paolini’s sci-fi debut a couple years ago but he just came out with its prequel “Fractal Noise” and I liked it even more.

For some good old fashioned space opera brilliance I recommend the “Final Architecture” trilogy by Adrian Tchaikovsky. The last book of the series just came out and I DEVOURED it. Tchaikovsky’s Children of Time,Ruin,and Memory are also phenomenal, you really just can’t go wrong with him.

For more space opera and politics I highly recommend Arkady Martine,she DEBUTED with “Memory Called Empire” which won all sorts of awards. The sequel also recently came out but I haven’t gotten the chance to read it.

I’m in the middle of reading Pierce Brown’s “Red Rising” saga,which I would describe as adult Hunger Games,and have thoroughly enjoying it as well!

For fantasy I love Samantha Shannon’s “Priory of the Orange Tree” and “A Day of Fallen Night”. You’ll get varying opinions of what to read first,I read Priory when it first came out so that’s my biased opinion.

I’m a massive fan of “She Who Became the Sun” by Shelly Parker-Chan and their sequel “He Who Drowned the World” and I want it to go on record I read SWBS when it first came out and before it blew up *flips hair*

R.J. Barker’s “Tide Child” trilogy is awesome,first book of that series is “The Bone Ships.” It’s high seas fantasy with dragon bone ships and epic war and amazing world building.

I always highly recommend “Gideon the Ninth” by Tamsyn Muir and now also the rest of the books in the series. I think the usual pitch is lesbian necromancers in space.

I cannot cannot recommend “The Shadow of the Gods” by John Gwynne enough! It’s quintessential epic fantasy told as a Norse epic and it’s in my top five of modern fantasy books.

While I have serious beef with Song of Achilles just like our fellow obikin Will,I did love and devour Madeline Miller’s “Circe.” In every way I think it’s her superior work.

I can’t recommend fantasy without recommending “The Grace of Kings” by Ken Liu. His entire series will blow your socks off,but the first book won nearly every award for fantasy books that have ever existed.

I’m a huge fan of R.F Kuang’s “The Poppy War” series although I’ve heard this one is a contentious recommendation. I think this series is hate or love it but if for whatever reason you don’t vibe with this series I also highly recommend Kuang’s “Babel.”

If you want something a little less well known I could chew through drywall over Simon Jimenez’s “The Spear Cuts Through Water.” It was in my top five of 2023 release books.

I can also make a separate rec list of less new books and overall classics I always recommend or gift to people,both fiction and nonfiction!

#book recs #book recommendations #science fiction #fantasy #anons

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open-hearth-rpg · 2 months

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Coming Back: Fallen Campaigns & Rebirths

From Age of Ravens

CAN CAMPAIGNS AGE WELL?

This first part of the year sees me coming back to two longer online series I’ve run before. The first is the third and what I plan to be the final arc of our Godbound campaign. This is after a long break, with the second arc happening in mid-2022. At this point they have hit the higher levels there and I want to close out some of those stories. It’s been a great couple dozen sessions and I love these characters, but I want to get that some resolution.

The other is Fearful Symmetries, a Trail of Cthulhu campaign set in 1930s England, with the characters as magicians fighting a secret war. We finished the first story in March of last year. We took advantage of the real world time gap to give the characters a gap as well. Session one was a “getting the band back together” episode. In it we got to see how each investigator had dealt with the fallout from their arcane showdown. It provided a solid baseline the characters have been able to play off of.

Last year I also returned to a Hearts of Wulin mystery series with two new cases. We managed to reconnect with the big picture threats and story, even though it’d been over a year since we’d played last. We plan on coming back to that for another mystery later this year. Likewise we’re planning on coming back to our Girl by Moonlight game– three months wasn’t enough so we’re going to add another two months to wrap the story.

Here’s the thing: I have never, ever been able to do this with a face to face game. Every single hiatus or break for a campaign has resulted in that campaign dying out. And it wasn’t just me, I saw this happen to other GMs in the area. My late friend Barry was notorious for this– starting amazing high concept campaigns with energy, but then “taking a short break” which meant we’d never play again.

Another one, Rob, had something of the opposite problem. He would run long, multi-year campaigns. Then at some point he would take a break for burnout or to recharge his batteries. Inevitably he never returned to these campaigns, leaving them so close to the finish line the players could see it. He would tease folks with the possibility of going back and finishing their stories, but never would.

And I’m not innocent of this. But it has been a while since I “paused” a game as a way of ducking out. Now if it isn’t working I say that and call it or tell everyone and then steer into some kind of finale. That, like Barry and Rob above, comes from me as a GM not feeling it.

MORTAL BELOVED

But then we have those games that I wanted to return to. The ones which never got finished because circumstances worked against them. Or the inertia of things pulled us away. Or the people changed in the intervening period. These I really mourn.

I ran a dynamite short Star Wars series which was intended to be the first movie,in a “new trilogy” (before the new trilogy actually came out). This Episode VII absolutely clicked and I planned to do Episode VIII after a short break for another game. But by the time it was possible, that gaming group had reorganized. Other GMs’ new games took up the nights and players available. We never went back.

We had a great Exalted Dragon-Blooded game that we had to hold off from because two of the players went through a divorce. We tried coming back to it, but the one member of the couple who returned clearly wasn’t feeling it. So we ended up dropping it. A similar thing happening with a wuxia game, using Storyteller, I ran with a great trio of players. When one of them unexpectedly decided to stop playing because he and his wife had issues, we had to close that down. Because he never actually told us, we never got to do a finale session.

And, of course, COVID has killed a couple of my games. We had a long-running Sunday group, going on twenty years, but we ended that. Another campaign had been running for almost four years. I asked about transitioning to online, but one of the players (ironically the one who had kibosh’ed the wuxia game) refused to play online. So we went on hold, but I knew we would never come back. The other two f2f campaigns which we transitioned to online survived. One, 13th Age, eventually shifted back to in-person after a year and a half. The other remains online.

But online games, somehow, have managed to survive these breaks. We’ve gone back and picked them up without missing a beat. I had a long-running Mutants & Masterminds campaign online where we broke up each arc with a different game. And it worked– each time we came back folks knew the world and were excited to play again, even if it’d been many months.

BREAKING POINTS

So why?

I have theories. First, having an accessible, shared body of material really helps. Character keepers remain– people don’t can’t file away their characters sheets and lose them. They don’t feel like artifacts of something lost. You can review your own character and remind yourself who everyone else played. Keepers offer a strong, complete snapshot of where the game ended. That’s especially true if someone kept a running log of notes. An NPC tab with pictures goes a long way to reorienting people to the setting and situation.

Second, it is easy. You set a schedule and share links. It’s all there, ready and waiting for you. If someone can’t return you can hide their character in the keeper. Maybe they will come back eventually. It's easy to slot in new players to these kinds of ongoing campaigns.

Third, you can return exactly to the space you left. You return to an online call– a timeless zone. Things may have changed, but generally you can fall back to a sense of familiarity. That goes a long way to establishing continuity.

Fourth, it overcomes a certain inertia which applies to all online games. I’m a generally shy person; when I have to go somewhere physically, I don’t dig it. My brain looks for excuses not to go out into public. Online play clears away some of that.

Fifth, online play– at least in our community— is built on a certain social contract. Players sign up for games– something which asks for a modest commitment to play on their part. That’s combined with a waiting list which means that if folks can’t show up, other people can be slotted in. That combines to create a pressure to actually show up or at least to work to make sure other people have access to those slots. Ironically I think that makes people more likely to show up. The act of just having a system makes it more likely folks will consider their attendance and participation.

LAST EPISODES

Are there lessons we can take from those for non-online games going on breaks or hiatus? Maybe? I suspect having a shared folder– maybe of scanned documents and materials– would make it easy to come back. Likewise keeping a copy of everyone’s character sheet. NPC image collections can help as well– maybe with Pinterest sub-boards. Starting again online and then moving back to f2f might be a good way to gauge if everyone’s still on board. It might also be good, even if the game was more casual before, to set up a calendar and some kind of sign ups. That helps support and remind community members.

I have a handful of games I really want to go back to. In the past I would have considered those dead and buried, but know I’m not go sure.

#ttrpg #rpg

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morganas-pendragons · 1 year

Text

Ocean(s) Away | E.M.

THIS IDEA WILL NOT LEAVE ME ALONE

Have the Reader from my first Elijah fic with Elijah at a gala, totally not based on the song Ocean Away from The Unofficial Bridgerton Musical. This has been sitting in my drafts forever and I’m trying to clear all these fics out LOL

Enjoy!

***

You had him. You had him, and then you lost him, and the world hasn’t been quite right since.

You should’ve expected it, trying to date a Mikaelson was always bound to end in failure. Rebekah had warned you as such. Even then, you had refused to heed her warnings about her brother and had instead done the one thing you’d never regret: You’d gone and fallen in love with him.

You’d fallen in love with someone who was eternal, and you were finite.

It was always bound to be tragic.

What a beautiful party I'm looking up at the ceiling a lot The chandelier is so sparkly

Why you agreed to come to this, you have no idea. Niklaus and the remainder of his family who had not fallen victim to the war in New Orleans had decided to hold a gala in their family home, and you’d graciously accepted his invitation because he’d come to you and laid it in your hands himself.

So you’d put on a dress, did your hair, finished your makeup, and kept your chin held high as you entered the Mikaelson home in the French Quarter. The ballroom was already bustling, filled with the likes of the vampires and witches who now occupied the Quarter -- with the occasional werewolf lingering uncomfortably in the corners.

You saw him long before he saw you. It wasn’t hard to be drawn to Elijah. Someone as naturally handsome as he was never quite saw the beauty of being someone’s desire... and you had desired him from the first moment you’d seen him on that corner watching you play violin.

You never said sorry Guess you forgot Or maybe you're not sorry at all

“Darling, you made it!” Niklaus’ bright eyes gleamed as he stepped into your path, eyeing the violin bag slung over your shoulder. You returned the smile and allowed him to kiss your cheek before you parted from one another. “I’ve explicitly told the musicians to leave a spot for our star violinist who’s to perform this evening.”

“Thank you, Nik.” You murmur in reply, eyes cast just over his shoulder where Elijah’s head is tipped back - clearly laughing, given the reaction in his expression and his body - at the girl across from him. A pretty brunette you’ve never seen before. “I am afraid that afterward I will have to depart quickly. I have... other commitments.”

You really just weren’t sure you could stand to be in the same room as Elijah when he was looking at someone else the way he should’ve been looking at you.

Klaus followed your eyes toward Elijah and Hayley. He’d only just heard of your break-up the week before, hidden from the truth by his brother’s persistence of keeping so much to himself. The only thing Elijah couldn’t seem to keep quiet was his blooming affection for Hayley.

“My brother is one of the smartest people I know,” Klaus confessed quietly as he wound an arm through your own to lead you to the stage. “But he is also one of the most ignorant people I know.”

“You don’t need to explain, Nik-”

Turning to meet his eyes as you steadied yourself on the steps of the stage, you peered downward at him. Niklaus Mikaelson had a reputation for being fearsome, cold and cruel. He so rarely allowed himself to reach his fullest capacity of love.

To be loved. Not until her. Not until Hope had been born.

With you, though... There was something different about you that prompted Nik to be more cordial. More attentive to others feelings - especially yours and Rebekah’s - but only when no one else was paying attention.

That didn’t matter though. You were just happy he wanted to guard your heart from his brother.

“But you deserve more than Elijah made you endure,” Nik replied. Your cheeks warmed as he pressed the gentlest kiss to your cheek before stepping away. “And you deserve the love you gave him.”

But a beautiful evening I want to know just what the hell are you thinking Oh so stoic, emotionless, over us all so quickly What am I missing?

You don’t dare move until Klaus is addressing the crowd, thus drawing attention to the night’s star violinist as you begin to tune the instrument pressed against your shoulder.

“It is my greatest pleasure to introduce the best violinist in the French Quarter, Y/N.”

Exhaling slowly through your nose, you poised the bow against the instrument and began to play as the crowd quieted and zeroed in on the haunting notes of the melody you played echoing against the high ceilings of the ballroom.

You closed your eyes and lost yourself in the music. It was better then gazing over the crowd and inevitably locking eyes with the man who had ruined you.

I can't even drink champagne No, without seeing your face Am I the one to blame? When we're dancing in the same room And you're an ocean away

***

What a terrible soirée With terrible people pretending they're happy In this masquerade We go through the motions When all that we wish is escape From the choices we make

He’s lost himself in the familiarity of Hayley. It’s not until she’s tugging eagerly on his sleeve to motion to the stage where Niklaus has just introduced the guest musician for the evening that he notices it: Y/N. You.

He hasn’t seen you since he left you crying on the corner beneath the dim street lamp in the light haze of rain. That image would be burned into Elijah’s mind forever.

It was for the best. The two of you had barely just begun dipping your toes into the waters of your budding relationship when you had murmured something in the throes of passion about wanting him, just him, forever.

And well... Elijah had never had forever, so he’d run. All the girls he’d loved over the years were finite. They’d died.

He couldn’t watch you die too.

“It is my greatest pleasure to introduce to you one who may be the most talented musician in the French Quarter. Ladies and Gentleman, Y/N,” Niklaus extended a hand in your general direction, and Elijah watched as you allowed your eyes to flutter closed and lost yourself in your music.

And then I see her smiling How can she be smiling? There's been no reconciling And when she's at my focus she won't even notice my gaze How can she be okay

The standing ovation given to you is one well deserved. You’re quick to address the whole crowd, deliberate in keeping your gaze away from him, and Elijah is helpless to do anything but watch as his brother takes your hand and sweeps you out onto the dance floor.

Even with the object of his desires as of late on the dance floor in his arms, Elijah is entranced by you.

It will inevitably ruin him.

***

When I can't even drink champagne, no Without seeing your, face Am I the one to blame? When were dancing in the same room but you're an ocean away

“Y/N,” You shiver as Niklaus’ hands settle against your back - as your dress has the back cut out, another deliberate move in an attempt to draw Elijah’s attention - and begin tracing patterns against the bare skin there as he pulls you impossibly closer. “Look at me.”

Heavy-lidded eyes shift upward to meet his own. Those piercing, transparent greens are staring back at you with such an intensity that you believe they may burn you to your core on the spot.

And that doesn’t cover the want lingering in them. In his. In yours.

But the real question is... who do you want?

“Nik-”

His head dips to the bare expanse of your shoulder and settles there, lips burning their mark against your skin as your head falls forward to give him the ability to continue.

“My brother is many, many things,” Niklaus whispered in your ear as he continued his ascent towards your mouth. “But he has never quite been able to see what is truly right in front of him. For that he is a fool.”

You thread your fingers into the hair at his nape. “But you,” You reply. “You are no fool.”

He flashes that wicked grin that’s all teeth and downright vicious as he brings his face just close enough to yours to feel the warmth of your breath against his face. Something burns low in your stomach because of it. You hadn’t felt want like this since the last time you’d been with Elijah.

And well, maybe there’s that small part of you that wants to make him pay for taking you and leaving you behind with his presence burned into the very fabric of you.

“No, I don’t believe I am.”

You nudge your head backward in Elijah’s direction as the two of you continue around the width of the dance floor. There’s too many bodies around and it’s far too warm, but even you can feel Elijah’s gaze burning into the back of your head. “Well then,” You muse. “Why don’t you show your brother just who you really are, Niklaus?”

And then he surges forward to kiss you, all consuming and all heat right in the middle of a crowd that sees every moment of it.

Elijah nurses his champagne flute in the corner just out of sight. Hayley has gone off to tend to Hope, leaving him alone with nothing but his desires and the drink to drown them in.

If this was the game you wished to play, so be it.

#Elijah mikaelson #Elijah mikaelson x reader #the originals #the originals fanfiction #the originals imagines

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sacrificesapnap · 1 year

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My all-time favourite DNF fanfiction

Over the last year and a half, I have read almost every single DNF fic that has been posted to AO3, yet ended up with a rec list with just over 10 fics. These are my favourite favourite DNF fics. If you think I’ve missed something - let me know!! I always need new fanfic to read :)

This list will be updated when I find something that I think deserves a top spot. Please make sure you read tags before reading, because a lot of these will have adult content and other possibly triggering subjects. I hope you enjoy!

Heat Waves by tbhyourelame

Word count : 51,840

Dream has always held a gentle admiration for George, but when their nuanced friendship trickles into his sleeping mind, he awakens to a new world of conflicting emotions and longing. Lost in the midst of a heat wave, he continuously listens to a song that works itself in to the very core of his heartache. Floridian nights, unsent messages, spiraling infatuation, and terrible, terrible weather.

This is an obvious recommendation but how could I actually make a fic rec list without putting heatwaves on it. It has great characterisation, a lot of the plot is true to real life or close to real life, and it has a painfully accurate amount of overthinking and pining. Heatwaves itself is finished, however the sequel Helium is a WIP, which the author has said they currently have no plans of finishing. Either way, it’s well worth reading, and a must-read to anyone new to the fandom or new to reading fics.

When by hayloftown

Word count : 163,493

Trust doesn't come easily, but fear does. Dream was dealt a bad hand, who can blame him for his hostility? Or, in which Dream comes from a bad background and finds safety in a new home. Whether that "home" be the place or the people, he is unsure.

God, hayloftown’s fics are incredible. I am not joking when I tell you I have never cried more at a book or fanfic EVER. It was devastating. That being said I literally had to read it in one sitting. This fic describes complex emotions, feelings and especially bonds between people incredibly, and it is so enjoyable to watch dream’s character develop throughout. I actually felt hollow after reading this, because by the end I loved all the characters so much I never wanted it to end. This fic has some pretty heavy themes, so please read tags before reading this one.

Stars, Stripes and Aristocratic Snobs by hayloftown

Word count : 122,536

Even hundreds of years since their historical wars over independence, American politics and British royalty still struggle to get along, as seen in the rivalry between first son Clay “Dream” Chapman and Prince George of Wales. After a week long trip to the UK after the "tragic" passing of Prince Charles, the successor to the throne and Prince George's father, the two are forced to get along and put forth a better front for the ever-present media.

It’s only fair to have two works by hayloftown on this list, because they are both favourites of mine. I am such a sucker for royalty au’s (prepare to lots more on this list) so this was perfect to me. The summary says everything you need to know about this fic, so I won’t say too much, but I really enjoyed George and Dream’s dynamic in this fic, and I’m a slut for george in a position of power (sorry not sorry).

I’ve Never Fallen From Quite This High by Scoops (consciousness_streaming)

Word count : 92,419

A phone call out of the blue after two months in Florida turns George's life up side down. As one relationship falls apart, another falls together.

This fic is soooo good. Without spoiling too much, George deals with his parents’ relationship problems whilst developing a relationship with dream (I’m telling you this because I had this in my marked for later for ages and I didn’t read it because I was scared the aforementioned relationship that was falling apart was karlnap lol). If you love family dynamics and domestic fluff this is a must read. George’s mum is the main character in this honestly she’s such an icon, but I just love the dynamic between all the characters in this. 10/10 would recommend.

The mon cœur s'ouvre à ta voix series by saintaches

Word count : 108,775 across three works

Dream and George attend the same prestigious conservatoire, and they fucking hate each other.

I will admit that I originally clicked on this fic for the porn. However, after reading the plot that came with the porn, it turned into one of my favourite fics ever. It’s so beautifully written, a bit purple prosey at times, and is honestly art in writing form. Honestly parts of these works are a little devastating, but its worth it for the development of both dream and George individually and their relationship.

Metanoia by 24notfound

Word count : 246,211

Following the death of Queen of Salacia, George is thrown into kingship. And in reluctantly preparing for an indefinite war on the account of avenging his mother, George's vision seems to get blurred by the unlikely and unexpected bond he forms with the Prince of Vulcan: Dream.

Honestly this is just the perfect fantasy dnf fic, combining royalty and war with elemental powers. Aside from all the family dynamics and dnf’s actual relationship, the two things that I loved the most in this fic were the relationship between George, Karl and Quackity and their wonderful outfit’s and parties. Another perfect work.

as for praise and worship by squigly

Word count : 121,006

George is a detective working for Scotland Yard investigating a string of art thefts linked to grisly murders. Dream is a gambler who knows more than he lets on. They can't stay away from each other, even when they should.

This is such a wonderful plot heavy story, and the way squigly created this world and developed the story around Dream and George’s characters will have you gripped from the first chapter. Honestly, this story deserves to be published as a novel, it just has such an immersive and exciting storyline that I have no doubt you will read this in one setting (just like I did).

for you, the stars by andthentheybow

Word count : 115,149

There is exactly one person in the entire universe that knows Doctor George Davidson is alive, and that’s George himself. Even with everything against him- starvation, damaged machinery, the environment, and human error- he’s determined to not become the first person to die on Mars. And once they find out he’s alive, his crew resolves to do everything they can to bring him home.

When I first read the description for this fic I was not expecting to love it as much as I do simply because the situation is so far removed from both cc!dnf and c!dnf that it didn’t feel like it would work. However, their characters in this are so true to real life, and the astronauts have to face publicity and pressure from the public. I love this because I feel like georges intelligence gets lost all the time in fanfiction, but hes appreciated in all his genius glory here, pure bamf George through and through. Good bit of angst and pining, a side of karlnap, and really funny roles for a lot of the other smp members, this is just a really enjoyable read.

Reflections by darlingsdream

Word count : 128,341

In which Dream is assigned as Prince George's new personal guard and finds that it is surprisingly easy to fall for the royal with the spunky attitude but incredibly hard to keep his secrets from him.

This is a perfect Prince!George / Knight!Dream story. It has lots of plot twists and angst but its worth it for such a good story. If you love fantasy or the dynamic between princes and their guard, you will love this. I need to reread this asap tbh.

cinnamon and swirl by offday

Word count : 83,327

Sapnap stays quiet a moment, and while Dream sniffles, the little girl in his lap turns, taps against his face like the tears are common. Dream kisses at her hand, promises her he is okay. He acts like nothing is wrong. Like Sapnap isn’t crying in front of him too, when he should be scolding Dream.

“Why didn’t you?” Sapnap asks as he swipes the back of his hand over his nose. “I mean, not even George?”

Dream decides to tell his friends about his daughter right before they move in.

This is hands down the best DNF kid fic ever!! For some reason, I much prefer kid fics where one person is a single parent and the other person joins them later on. This fic is just perfect. I love that it’s not an AU (other than the fact dream is a dad), I live for uncle Sapnap and dreamnap’s friendship and I would die for protective dad!dream like that’s so attractive are you kidding me. I don’t care if you don’t normally like kid fics, read this now!!

Protected by Anonymous

Word Count : 102,200

Dream is the Crown Prince and the future king. His sworn duty is to protect his kingdom from outside threats, especially from the scourge of magic.

George is his best friend and, technically, his servant. And he has a secret.

I wish the author of this fic would reveal themselves because I would die to read more of their work. Anyway. I love this so so much. It’s a merlin AU fic where George has magic in a kingdom where magic is banned. Another great one for anyone that likes royalty au’s and once again it has a healthy amount of pining and angst all mixed in with fluff and fantasy and ugh I love it. A lot of fantasy fics are heavy on dream protecting George but I love the dynamic in this where magic George is secretly protecting dream and saving his life. To be honest this fic lives in my head rent-free sometimes. Even if you think this won’t be your cup of tea please just give it a try because it’s so good!

#dnf fic #dnf #dnf fanfic #dreamnotfound #dreamnotfound fic #dnf fic recs #fic recs #dsmp #mcyt #georgenotfound #dream #dreamwastaken #dnf ao3 #this feels like a piece of my soul

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spocksocksrock · 7 months

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ok I saw the reblog of your star trek books post about someone asking for recs someday, but I’m impatient and have decided I am not gonna wait and that I will send the recs ask MYSELF dammit!!

I feel like i’ve never gotten into the books because I’m worried they will be bad, so if you have any TOS/DS9 book recs I would LOVE to hear them — I have consumed all Star Trek content made up until this point and am so so desperate for new material

thank you SOOO much for asking i love any excuse to talk about st books!!! (though it is kinda funny cause that same person talking about recs did end up messaging me already lol)

for TOS i would say the best ones are:

Killing Time by Della Van Hise — famously gay and for good reason, it’s just blatantly romantic spirk content. it’s all about how they are meant to be together in every alternate universe and that they are soulmates <3

Spock’s World by Diane Duane — bones, kirk, and spock go to vulcan because the vulcans are considering leaving the federation. really great plot and super accessible characterization for the main three!

Vulcan’s Forge by Susan Shwartz — follows two plots- young spock figuring out that he wants to join star fleet, and older spock dealing with kirk’s death and trying to move on. it’s really not as sad as it sounds and it adds so much to spock’s character imo.

id honestly also recommend the novelizations of the movies, they definitely add a lot of new content

—

DS9 is harder cause i love soooo many of these but some of the best are:

Hollow Men by Una McCormack — kind of a sequel to the episode ‘in the pale moonlight’, garak and sisko go on a trip to earth to deal with dominion war stuff (and everyone else has shenanigans on the station)

The 34th Rule by Armin Shimerman — basically quark whump, him and rom are sort of kicked off the station and go to a prison camp and the rest of the characters have conflicting feelings about this (it’s a bit overdramatic at times but i love quark-centric stories so 🤷)

Fallen Heroes by Dafydd ab Hugh — this one is pretty crazy, quark and odo suddenly travel 3 days into the future and find the entire station is dead, like Everyone died, and they have to figure out what happened and fix it (i love quodo and there’s a scene where quark vacuums odo up, need i say more)

Saratoga by Michael jan Friedman — sisko is meeting with the other survivors from the ship jennifer died on. there’s sabotage, intrigue, betrayal and such and then the b plot is that odo has to pretend to be quark. so basically an average ds9 episode lol

there are definitely a lot more good ones but it depends on what characters you like and what kinds of stories you’re looking for ya know? please please message me if you want to talk ab it more!!!!

#star trek books #star trek #ds9 #tos

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forever-rogue · 2 years

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obi-wan requests are open i see 👀

i do love the idea of obi-wan coming to rescue so i was hoping to request a similar premise where the reader is a princess and they bond over the journey getting back to her home and it gets a bit angsty parting ways bc they've grown attached to each other. it's up to you how to end it if you want a nice ending or leave us in shambles i trust ur work 👀

AN | I don’t know why you trust me, when you definitely shouldn’t 😏 Just kidding! Or am I? Decide for yourself, I suppose. I’ve decided to set this before RotS because I want my boy to be happy!🥰 Enjoy!

Pairing | Obi-Wan x Fem!Reader

Warnings | None

Word Count | 2.5k

Masterlist | Main, Star Wars

── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ──

You weren’t even sure how long you’d been traveling with him at this point. It had been…an interesting journey to say the least, but not nearly as interesting as your travel companion was. When you’d been informed that a Jedi would be sent to accompany you back to your home on Gatalenta, you were sure it would be either one of the younger, more bright eyed Jedi that didn’t quite know what they were doing just yet or one of the older and more wary ones. Your little security detail had fallen somewhere right in the middle in the form of a Jedi that was much too handsome and much too wise for his own good.

Obi-Wan Kenobi was nothing short of mysterious.

He was always polite, from the moment he’d meet you, if not a bit formal. When he’d first shaken your hand, calling you princess (something that made you feel warm and flush way more than it should have), you insisted he call you by your name. After all, if you were going to be stuck with him for an indeterminate amount of time, you might as well get to know each other. Right? Right. At least that’s what you told yourself as you looked into those soft blue eyes. His presence really shouldn’t have made you that happy and yet…it felt like there was something drawing you into him.

You decided then and there as you followed him onto the transport ship that you were going to solve the enigma that he was.

── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ──

“Obi-Wan?” you stuck your head out of the ship’s door to see if you could spot him. You knew he’d left at some point, something about getting out for some fresh air, but hadn’t heard him back. It wasn’t that you were exactly worried about him but…you were worried about him. With a small huff when you didn’t see him, you moved to head down the ramp to see if you could spot him, “Obi?”

Nothing but the soft whistle of the wind in the trees reached your ears. Silly man. You figured that there was nothing wrong with going out and stretching your own legs for a bit. You’d be back before he even noticed you were gone. There was a meadow of wildflowers you had noticed when you’d first landed here to rest before finishing up your journey. You weren’t particularly keen on ending it any way; the idea that you would be devoid of Obi-Wan’s presence was not a concept you particularly liked. You’d grown closer to him than you had imagined you would and while part of you was sure it wasn’t a good idea in the long run, you found that you really didn’t care.

You cast a last look back at the ship before walking in the direction of the sweet smell from the field of flowers.

── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ──

There were so many wonderful, beautiful, different flowers all growingly wildly around the meadow. You walked through their natural paths, letting your fingertips skim over the blooms and blossoms. It was peaceful here - quiet. There was almost no noise besides that of the native wildlife and fauna and your own soft breaths. It was a sharp contrast to the city life you’d grown up in.

A little creature found you eventually; you weren’t sure what it was but it looked to be something between a loth cat and a koriena. It was cute and had come up to you for pets, rubbing against your legs and purring happily. After giving it a few good scratches, it followed you around as you studied all the different flowers. There were so many colorful flowers, but you naturally gravitated towards the hues of pinks and purples in various soft, pastels.

“Come on,” you motioned for your new little friend to follow as you started to gently pick the flowers, “I don’t know if you can really help me with picking these, but I’ll be glad for your company.”

You were met with a few happy chirps as it bounced around you as you gathered up all the flowers you needed. When you were satisfied with the bundle in your arms, you plopped on some of the soft looking ground. You reached for the first flowers and linked them together, “has anyone ever made you a flower crown before? I doubt it, huh? Well, today’s your lucky day!”

You worked on weaving the flowers together for some time, first making a smaller one for the small critter before making another. It was nice to be there by yourself, to enjoy the stillness and nature rather than running from one thing to the next. Part of you never wanted to leave; part of you would have been content to stay forever, along with Obi-Wan.

“Princess!” you almost jumped when you heard the sound of his voice. You looked up and found him standing at the edge of the meadow, hands on his hips, “where have you been?”

You stood up and quickly bounded over to him, the critter right behind you, fresh crown clutched tightly in your hands, “Obi-Wan!”

“I’ve been looking for you all over,” the look of exasperation slowly melted into a much softer expression, “you shouldn’t just go wandering off like that - something could have happened.”

“Oh? And about yourself, hmm?” you raised an eyebrow, gently nudging him with your elbow, “I believe a certain Jedi went out by himself this morning. I did look for you, Obi-Wan, but when I saw you were gone, I just took a little stroll.”

“I had intended on returning before you were even aware I was gone,” he admitted, a flush of pink rising in his cheeks, “for what it’s worth, I’m sorry for worrying you, Princess.”

“Consider yourself forgiven,” you lightly rocked back and forth on your heels for a moment before holding up your little creation, “here - I made this. For you.”

“For me?” he asked quietly as you reached up and set it on the top of his head. You bit the inside of your cheek and hoped that you hadn’t overstepped any boundaries. Your relationship with him had gone from purely professional to what you would consider a friendship, and now…you weren’t quite sure what to label it. You knew, you’d always known, that it could never be more than a friendship, and yet…your feelings had appeared not to cooperate or listen to the logical reasoning of your mind, “whatever for?”

“No reason,” you beamed from ear to ear as you pointed towards your new friend, “I made one for him too. I don’t know exactly what he is but he’s been hanging with me and is very sweet.”

“Very cute,” he agreed, “thank you for this. It’s lovely.”

“It was nothing,” you put your hand on his shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze, despite your best efforts to avoid touching him, “it was just so nice out here and the flowers are beautiful. I couldn’t stay away.”

“I should have known,” he laughed lightly and oh. That beautiful sound made your knees feel weak, “you would manage to find a beautiful place, one to rival your own beauty.”

You swore your heart stopped as soon as you processed what he had said. No…surely you had heard him incorrectly. There was no way that he had said that. Nothing would prompt him to say that. You tried to calm your racing mind, well aware of the fact that he was way more in tune with them than the average person. You decided to ignore his comment, as much as you didn’t want to, since you weren’t absolutely positive about what he said.

“Come on,” you took a step back, motioning for him to follow you back to the ship, “we should get back. I suppose there’s no time to lose.”

He had a small sound in the back of his throat as he trailed behind you. The little creature fell into step with him, chirping and purring happily, “what about your new friend?”

“Oh,” you turned around and he gave you an almost pleading little look, “would you like to come with us?”

He appeared to nod before he ran over to you, rubbing against your legs. You reached down to pet his head, reluctant to just let him go.

“Obi-Wan,” you looked at him with a saccharine little smile and he knew he was in trouble, “can we take him with us? Pretty please? I promise he won’t get into any trouble.”

“And just how do you know that?” he crossed his arms over his chest as he looked at you with an amused expression.

“I can just…feel it,” you insisted, “I can bring him back home, no one will notice. To be fair, no one really notices me. I’m just there, which is totally one of the reasons I’m okay with never going back…”

“Unfortunately that’s not an option,” he sighed as he studied the ground for a moment before nodding, “alright, he can come with us.”

“Thank you, Obi-Wan,” you worried your bottom lip before continuing on your little walk back, “you’re wonderful.”

── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ──

A few more days passed and the end of your time together was looming closer with each passing second. What you wouldn’t give for something to go horribly wrong so you would have a reason to stay with him. You’d spent a lot of time in your private quarters, attempting to quash the last right of feelings you had for him. It hadn’t worked - if anything it had only made your feelings worse. You’d analyzed and thought over almost every interaction you’d had with him, trying to pinpoint when it had all gone downhill.

That’s when you came to the conclusion that it had probably been the moment he had first spoken your name. Then it turned into all the small, lingering touches, the silly little jokes you shared with only each other, the whispered late night conversations, the looks that spoke volumes. Oh. You had it bad for him; but you shouldn't have. He wasn’t someone you could fall in love with. He wasn’t someone you should ever have had feelings for. You know the Jedi were not allowed to have relationships or families. He was probably the last person in the galaxy you should have loved. And on top of that, it wasn’t like he was just going to reciprocate those feelings. He wasn’t going to just change his life for you or leave the order. It would be ridiculous to even consider the notion that he would, that he would find you someone worthy of his time.

By the time the moment to part ways had come, you were overwhelmed with a wave of emotions. Your bags were packed and sitting by the door, waiting to be taken inside to the small palace where you lived. It didn’t feel like home in the slightest anymore.

“It feels strange,” you were looking out into the city, watching people bustling about their days, “to be back to the place that is my home and have it feel like anything but home.”

“Unfortunately there are often things we don’t have control over,” Obi-Wan was at your side, his arm brushing against yours. You were practically vibrating with energy from his touch, “but we must do them nonetheless.”

“What if we don’t do them?” you sighed wistfully, not daring to look over at him, “what if we decide that sometimes we have to make our own destinies?”

Obi-Wan was silent for a few moments, thoughtfully running a hand through his hair. He wondered what you would think if you could hear his thoughts. If you heard them would you run away and never look back? He’d spent his time with you, finding his own feelings growing, unsure of how to handle them. Everything he’d been taught since he was a mere boy was being challenged. He’d felt something change from the moment he’d met you, and now he was left trying to figure out what to do.

“I wish I had the answer for that,” he whispered as he turned to look at you. It made his heart break to see the upset expression on your face. Your eyes were glossy with unshed tears, the corners of your mouth tugged down in a deep frown, “but I’m afraid I don’t have all the answers.”

“I wish you did too,” you swallowed the lump that had welled up in your throat, “I don’t want to go back.”

“I…I don’t want you to go back either,” he admitted softly and you felt warmth flush your face. He wasn’t looking at you now; he knew if he did wouldn’t be able to let you go, “but you must.”

“I’ll miss you,” you sniffled before dabbing at your eyes, “you’ve been…wonderful. I can’t ever thank you enough for your help and keeping me safe. It’s nice to know I have a friend out there in the galaxy.”

You heard your name being called from outside and your heart stopped into your stomach. You hung your head before slowly moving toward the doors. Everything already felt so wrong.

“Princess,” he reached for your hand, his long fingers wrapping around your wrist. You let out a startled little gasp before he pulled back toward him. He studied for a moment before his hands found your face, “I am…I am sorry. I wish…it were different. In any other lifetime it would be.”

“I know,” you offered him the best smile you could muster up before a few tears pearled up and ran down your cheek. Obi-Wan gently brushed them away with his thumb, “goodbye, Obi-Wan. I hope our paths cross again someday.”

And then he leaned in and kissed you; it was a gentle, soft little thing, almost as saracchine as he was. You pulled back and rested your forehead against his, “I will see you again. I swear it.”

This time, the call of our name was more annoyed and insistent. You put your hands on his before gently pulling them away, giving them a gentle squeeze before dropping them.

“Goodbye, Princess,” he felt choked up as he watched you go. He was half tempted to run after you and do something but his feet were rooted to the floor. Once you were off and immediately got pulled in one direction, you turned around to offer him a final little wave. He didn’t have it in his heart to return it.

He turned around and closed the doors to the ship before sighing heavily. Just like that, he felt as though a cloud was hanging over his head. Just like that he wondered if he had made the biggest mistake of his life.

But he would never know. He would just have to accept what was and return to his duties. Just like the good general and Jedi he was.

#obi-wan kenobi #obi-wan kenobi x you #obi-wan kenobi x reader #obi-wan kenobi x fem!reader #ewan mcgregor #ewan mcgregor x you #ewan mcgregor x reader #star wars #kenobi

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kuwdora · 10 months

Text

Star Wars audiobooks! I've been restless for new Star Wars since Andor ended. Been going through a handful of Disney era and Legends novels over the last few months. I have enough reactions to get down into an actual post. Mostly I'm just going to be foaming at the mouth over Marc Thompson and Sam Witwer's narration and falling over myself about the characters. I have listened to: Dark Disciple, Last Shot, Disney Thrawn trilogy, Heir to the Empire, Darth Maul: Shadow Hunter. Lots of these books I liked, some of them I didn't but the narration and characters are still amazing. Motherfucking MARA JADE. Asajj Ventress!!!!!!!! I have no rational mind about Maul and I am one of those feral stick figures chewing on Thrawn. Hnnghh.

First of all, let me start with Marc Thompson. He's been doing the audiobooks for years and years now. Here’s a great intro where he’s talking about the differences of doing character voices and learning the importance of bringing the right dynamic to the prose. He slips so seamlessly into his Star Wars voices reel, ahaha.

youtube

Here is a really cute Lip Sync Battle where Marc Thompson will say a line and then have a fan lip sync the same line back at the camera. His energy, his energy I love it so much. Everyone is having SO MUCH FUN. There’s also a cameo by Star Wars author Christie Golden in this video. Super cute.

youtube

First book:

Dark Disciple - Christie Golden Narrated by Marc Thompson

Alright I actually had picked this up ages go from my library and never read it but since I’ve been on an audiobook kick, Marc Thompson got me goin’ with alllll his voices.

I love Asajj Ventress so I was pretty much guaranteed to enjoy something from this book. Apparently it was written based on some unfinished scripts for an arc that would have happened if the show didn’t get cancelled. Knowing this makes a lot more sense with regards to the pacing and I think I would have preferred the animated episodic for this since I think a lot of the early Quinlan and Asajj stuff dragged a little too much. However I did appreciate getting more of a deeper dive in Asajj’s head and it really made me want to go digging through AO3 for some amazing character studies that I know must exist at this point.

But yeah, I didn’t think I’d enjoy the eventual romance between Asajj and Quinlan but Quinlan was such a perfect set-up for a fall from the Jedi Order. I think I’m just really easy when it comes to whumping the fuck out of Jedi with torture and their own emotional repression.

I was really into all the Dathomir scenes and the history of Asajj with her sisters being touched upon again and how she managed to not “go crazy from the dark side” because of the balance she found because she was a Nightsister.

A++ for Asajj having to go to Boba fucking Fett to mount a rescue mission inside a fake heist.

Really I think I’m just so easy for murdery women with a rage boner. Fuck Dooku.

Marc Thompson’s narration was a delight and I definitely would recommend this for anyone who enjoyed The Clone Wars series and wanted to get a little more Asajj screen time. Here’s a scene where someone pulled Clone Wars clips and put Dark Disciple audio underneath. Marc Thompson bringing incredible Dooku subservience and Sidious danger, hhhngh.

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7/10, would listen to again even though I'd rather see the finished episodes.

Last Shot (A Han and Lando Novel) - Daniel Jose Older Narrated by Marc Thompson, Daniel Jose Older and January LaVoy

This book was extremely disappointing. Normally I am a fan of seeing fan-favorites have their mid-life crises but I was extremely bored and over with Older’s take on Han having an existential crisis of who he was as a father an husband in this post-Empire world. Lando on the other hand, was having a crisis of genuinely having fallen in love and not knowing how to handle that. I fucking loved that.

This book had multiple timelines and jumped around a lot and I don’t know if I just wasn’t focused enough while listening but the timeline jumps were jarring and incomprehensible at times. The action plot ended up being rather unsatisfying.

It was also very jarring to have three narrators for the different timelines and I kind of feel bad because I went and looked and Older’s narration is just consistently getting panned across all reviewers—and for good reason. Thompson and LaVoy are experienced voice actors and with Older in the middle, Older just seems slapdash in his reading. If it was just Older all the way through I might have been more forgiving but going back and forth with everyone… it really was painful at times.

It was a slog to get through this book, really. What I actually really enjoyed was all the original characters: an Ewok slicer, a nonbinary hot shot pilot, and Lando’s love of his life whose name is slipping my mind even now, agh. I wasn’t fan of the villain character, unfortunately, and it was a bit of a letdown that the action plot was just… I don’t know, boring. It was a riff on transhumanism except with droids and a bit of droid supremacy to it and I was just... tired by it.

Marc Thompson was KILLING it tho. His performances always fucking delight me. January LaVoy’s narration of Lando and L-3 were also really great even though I just wasn’t into the scenes themselves.

3/10 - do not recommend, HOWEVER I would read fic about the lady ewok hacker Peekpa.

Darth Maul: Shadow hunter By Michael Reeves Narrated by SAM WITWER

I am, as the fannish parlance goes, Not Normal about Maul or Sam Witwer's performance as Maul.

This novel takes place just before the events of The Phantom Menace and it’s a Star Wars story that is very, very narrow in scope. The stakes are still very high because someone has gained information about the Trade Federation’s impending blockade and Sidious sends Maul to go and take care of it. The whole story takes place in the underbelly of Coruscant and I gotta say, it’s really refreshing after going through a bunch of Star Wars shows, books and films where it’s all galactic hopping whirlwind stuff to have that's in one place and happening in a short amount of time. I think it's something like 2 or 3 days that all the events happen.

Michael Reeves is a man of deep characterization and creates an amazing sense of place in the Black Sun alley of Corusant. We get very little Sidious and Maul interaction but what bits we do get are fascinating and haunting. I do like the ‘less is more’ approach here with these two...although I will say I’m not sure I would have picked up this book if I hadn’t gone through The Clone Wars and lost my goddamn mind over Sam Witwer’s portrayal of Maul.

And his performance here. In this book. I don’t know what it is about Witwer but when he does Maul my brain just lights up in a way that I haven’t really gotten outside of live theater performances. He brings this sense of ruthlessness and competence to Maul, his gleeful rage and oscillating mania as he ends up tracking an information broker and Jedi Padawan. Oh, Witwer is truly just. Fucking amazing, okay.

I would love this book even if it wasn’t Witwer narrating it but my god he elevates it to a whole new level. I got my copy from the library but it is immediately on my to-buy list once I can buy books again.

Michael Reeves also wrote for Batman the Animated series and Gargoyles which makes a whole lot of sense in the way he’s able to just create such lush sensory detail of place and people, oh holy fuck. He’s the writer who wrote the Gargoyles episode about Broadway accidentally shooting Elisa with her gun (this is an episode that got pulled from airing and I don’t think they have on Disney+ right now). Aw man, alright I definitely need to read more of his stuff now.

The action plot is Lorn Pavan is a down-on-his-luck fellow who got information he shouldn’t have and he is trying to sell it, Darsha the Jedi Padawan gets sent down to bring in a Black Sun informant and things go tits up for her in horrible ways. Darsha and Lorn’s paths collide and they try to survive Maul. I love everything about these characters, except for the end where Lorn started having romantic feelings about the Padawan. Blech.

Also somehow I think I-5 is now my second favorite droid character I’ve come across in the greater Star Wars canon (Chopper will always be my #1 grumpy cat droid). Witwer has the best dry delivery for the droid character. Like. It’s so fucking GOOD.

I’m also impossibly impressed and obsessed with Witwer’s performance of Sidious and the Jedi Council. His Qui-Gon is SO FUCKING GOOD. His Palaptine has my teeth rattling in my head oh my god.

Here’s the first 5 or so minutes of Shadow Hunter, hhnngh. You get Maul, Sidious a drunk Lorn Pavan, and my new droid bestie I-5:

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I am 100% going to be reading Michael Reeves’ other Star Wars novels. Apparently he has a series that follows a Jedi-in-hiding post-Order 66 and I want to just dunk my head in all the Star Wars noir, I guess, yes please.

10/10 - I love, would heartily recommend to anyone wanting a kind of story that’s more heavy on character and setting and also SAM WITWER!!!!!!!!! Maul. Hnnghghghgh.

TIMOTHY ZAHN TIME.

Thrawn Trilogy (Disney era) Thrawn, Thrawn Alliances, Thrawn Treason Narrated by Marc Thompson

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This was my second time through the Disney novels. I watched Star Wars Rebels first, then my friend jb_slasher told me about Thrawn having novels. I had vaguely heard of Heir to the Empire over the years and also my friend recommended the Disney trilogy so I figured I’d start with that since I was diving off from Disney canon anyway.

My god I love this trilogy so fuckin’ much. Marc Thompson out here nailing it. This Thrawn is the type of character who is always the smartest person in the room and I should get irritated by that like all the other characters but mmmm, I have a competence kink. And I am just over the moon with how he instills loyally and allegiance in his crew who can now have a commander who is not interested in politicking his way through things but actually is committed to strategy and whatnot.

Also fucking Zahn made Thrawn go back to space college. And gave him a little protege who he grew to admire. Eli Vanto is a great character, I am reading a lot of slash about them obviously but yeah, I loved seeing his growth throughout the trilogy. And THRAWN ALLIANCE. Y’all. Y’all. The Star Wars memes about Thrawn and Darth Vader and Anakin Skywalker are AMAZING and really do the hilarity so much justice. Here's a fantastic book trailer cut together with Marc Thompson' narration, hnngh.

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This man absolutely knows who Darth Vader is and Darth Vader is like “oh fuck no you don’t.” And when Thrawn had met Anakin during the Clone Wars and Anakin had to try and work together with him? Perfection. Bonus Padme getting to be a ridiculous and foolish badass when she goes looking for trouble. And also her also having a competence kink for Thrawn, too. It cracks me the fuck uuuuuup, okay.

Thrawn absolutely hates politics so fucking much and I love to see how that is the primary way he gets thwarted or has to build his strategy around. Because people are fucking assholes and political everywhere. Seriously, have I mentioned how much I love Marc Thompson??

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Thrawn Treason gave us more of Thrawn’s people and whatnot with the Chiss which I also liked but I’m really less interested in their motivations and experiences as a culture on the edge of the Empire. More here for Vanto now getting to be the fish-out-of-water and leveling up and getting all the respect he deserves.

MARC THOMPSON, y’all. He does a great Thrawn, an AMAZING whinybaby sycophant Ronan of the Starkiller Project, and his Eli Vanto Space Yokel intonation is 💋. Also I feel like the loyalty and trust that Thrawn earns from his subordinates really feeds into this praise kink thing that everyone develops by being around him. I love it.

10/10 will lose my mind and listen/read this trilogy again and also read all the fanfic about it.

Heir to the Empire Timothy Zahn

I am sorry it took me 30 years to get here but I AM NOW HERE FOR MARA JADE’S RAGE BONER. Let me repeat: MARA. JADE. !!!!!!!!!

Also holy fuck. Luke Skywalker getting to be smart, technically creative and able to navigate through terrible situations in spite of a Force-Blocking Macguffin is AMAZING. I was not expecting to be this into a post-Empire Luke but I really fucking loved it.

I also love all of the Han and Lando scenes in this (WAY MORE than Last Shot, sorry Daniel Jose Older).

Leia and Chewie!! On Kashyyk!! Talon Karrde was so great (Thompson made him kind of sound like Antonio Banderas??)

Thrawn and his bestie Pelleaon! What a fascinating dynamic.

I actually was not very into Thrawn’s vibes in this book as much as I was in the Disney stuff. I don’t know if it’s because of the vibes they wrote him in Star Wars rebels that got filtered back into Zahn’s take on him for the books (or if it was the other way around?) - Like, the calculating tactical and man of strategy is still there, but… hm, I’ve been struggling to articulate what about it that didn’t tickle me as much. He’s still playing the long game in every situation but I don’t know… I think there’s this more pragmatic view of people he has in the Disney books that he doesn’t get here in the first of this trilogy. I haven’t gotten to the other two books from this series yet so maybe I’ll feel differently later. The anniversary edition of the audiobook that I got from my library was narrated by Marc Thompson and he (you'll be so surprised) fucking nailed it all for me. Love love love.

10/10 timothy zahn, I love you. You got an amazing way of writing action. I gotta read more of your stuff. Anyway, I'm also starting the Ahsoka novella that I think (??) is not quite canon anymore since they got a final season for Clone Wars, but it's by E.K. Johnston and narrated by Ahoska's voice actor Ashley Eckstein. Don't have enough thoughts about it yet but I love Ahsoka so I'm sure I'll have a decent time.

#this is like 2k of me rambling and talking about my star wars feels wheee #star wars #kuwdora reads #star wars books #heir to the empire #thrawn alliances #thrawn treason #asajj ventress #thrawn #mara jade #sam witwer #darth maul #marc thompson #my posts #textpost #shadow hunter

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shefellofftheworld · 1 year

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Please lose the last shreds of your self control and yell about bd-1's arc and its place thematically in fallen order

Ahh I was not expecting anyone to want the rant but SINCE YOU ASKED

So I absolutely love JFO and everything about it, because at its core it’s a story about hope and healing when everything has fallen to pieces. I can’t get enough of that. I’m going to do my best to keep this post to a reasonable length, but I am going to be honest: brevity is not my strong suit when it comes to stuff I like. You have been warned.

Here’s the thing about BD-1: he didn’t need an arc. They didn’t need to thread him through the thematic and emotional heart of this game as much as they did!! That’s part of why his arc took me so much by surprise. He basically has a stealth arc, and it works so well because he’s already serving the game really well before I even got an inkling of it. So first I’m gonna go through BD-1 as I experienced him in my first playthrough, and then look at the ways that JFO retroactively adds a TON of meaning to his interactions with Cal.

Long post and many spoilers for Jedi: Fallen Order under the cut:

Bogano: First Impressions

BD-1 is a cute lil droid companion, and frankly Respawn could have stopped there and I would have been entirely on board. I mean, look at him.

He’s adorable.

Respawn didn’t stop there though! BD also serves to make several game mechanics diegetic in a really cool way. He provides the map, he does the healing, and he analyses stuff for the codex. Again: Respawn did not need to go as hard as they did. Cute Droid That Serves Gameplay Purpose would have been more than enough to sell me on BD-1. But! They not only used BD-1 to make those mechanics fit inside the narrative of the game, they used the gameplay mechanics to inform BD’s character!!!!

Excuse me while I take a moment to be incredibly excited about good game design.

So we first meet BD-1 on Bogano, just after the prologue/tutorial level for the game. We met Cal on Bracca, got introduced to our initial exploration and fighting mechanics, and played through JFO’s inciting incident. Cere and Greez drop Cal off on Bogano and give him two goals: meet someone important, and find the key to rebuilding the Jedi order.

We’re now introduced to the Meditation mechanic (Star Wars Brand Bonfires). It’s yet another example of how Respawn took a mechanic specific to the genre of game they were making and then turned it into a core part of the narrative.

I love this game so much.

It’s already been established that Cal’s trauma is hindering his ability to connect to the force—whenever he tries, he relives his memories of Order 66. After we finish the Meditation Tutorial, we exit to a cutscene that reinforces that character beat:

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And introduces someone new.

I know I talked a lot about Cal here, but that’s because BD-1’s characterisation is intrinsically linked to his interactions with Cal—he’s a Companion Character. It’s important that we first meet BD here. The first time we meet BD, Cal is in pain and BD-1 wants to help.

(I love him)

Throughout the game, we understand BD’s dialogue through other character’s responses—mostly Cal’s. In this scene, BD introduces himself and then asks Cal if he’s OK. Awww. Cal says he’s looking for someone, and BD-1 perks up and responds. “No, not you,” says Cal immediately. He’s looking for a Jedi! We’ve definitely never seen this play out before. BD-1 is not discouraged. He knows about a Jedi! He is Very Excited to lead Cal where he needs to go.

We learn a lot about BD from this scene! First: he’s adorable. I know I’ve said that a lot, but it bears repeating.

look at him

In terms of characterisation, we learn that BD-1 is helpful, important to Cal’s quest somehow, and apparently full of love and enthusiasm. He wants to know if Cal is ok!!! And he wants to help!!! BD stands both for Buddy Droid and for Best Droid. This scene has done its job well: the story has progressed, and presumably there remains not a single member of the audience who hasn’t instantly fallen in love with the Loveable Droid Character. This is good, because he’s going to be with us for the rest of the game.

Now we get to mechanics. First, we’re introduced to the map. Cal sees the Vault in the distance, and says that whoever he’s looking for must be waiting there. BD-1 stops frolicking to show Cal his map of the area, and the game takes a moment to do a tutorial. BD has helpfully put an objective marker over the vault! Thanks, lil guy. The holomap also highlights unexplored areas—more standard game fare, but because the map is diegetic, it’s also technically information about BD-1. He wants to help us explore!

The next thing we learn about BD-1 is that apparently he, uh. Likes to improvise. “Any ideas?” asks Cal. “We’ve got to get across this gap somehow.” BD-1 proposes that he serves as a tool to help Cal zipline across gaps. Both of them seem to have fun ziplining.

“How’d you know that would work?”

“Bee bo-boop!”

“Wait, you didn’t?”

Don’t sound so concerned, Cal. Nobody fell into any bottomless chasms. You don’t have any room to talk, anyway. I saw you on Bracca.

We run around a little more, and then the unthinkable happens. BD-1 rushes to the defense of a lil critter that’s about to get eaten by a predator, and gets his leg chomped for his troubles. He does a heartbreaking little limp away from danger while Cal practices his lightsaber skills

poor baby

Words cannot do this scene justice so I'll just give you a video:

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This scene reinforces how adorable BD-1 is (very adorable, in case anybody wasn’t sure) and continues to set up his friendship with Cal. It also serves to set up an in-game way for the devs to control access to certain areas of the map—BD’s busted scomp link is going to stop us from opening a few doors until we’ve hit a few more story beats.

This scene is also one of the most important in BD-1’s arc, but that doesn’t become apparent until later.

Shortly after this, Cal happens to receive some injuries that nobody could have possibly forseen or prevented by not swinging lightsabers at live wires. We get one of the most adorable cutscenes in the game:

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And then BD-1 presents Cal with the Star Wars Brand Estus Flask and joins Cal as a permanent companion.

(he's so cute)

Cal asks BD-1 how he got to Bogano, and BD-1 says he doesn’t remember. Weird for a droid to be forgetful, but oh well. To the Vault!

Ok but first we need to get some cosmetic loot, because the real goal of Jedi: Fallen Order is to collect ponchos.

BD-1 goes rifling through chests for us, because the devs at Respawn saw an opportunity for adorable character moments and grabbed it with both hands. Over the course of the game, BD-1 continues to fling himself at the nearest poncho receptacle. Cal in response takes a journey from confused through resigned and lands on indulgent. I love this game so much.

Ok, now to the Vault!

Wait wait wait BD-1 has found something cool and he really really wants to show it to you.

Now for real to the Vault.

There’s some more story stuff that happens before we get there, but that’s the bulk of our initial introduction to BD-1. We make a friend and learn a bunch of new mechanics, which themselves teach us about our friend. BD-1 is a friendly little droid who wants to help and likes to explore and learn things. He’s a bit of an adrenaline junkie and gets excited when there’s something to scan. He doesn’t like it when Cal gets hurt, and for some reason wants to go to the same Plot Location that Cal does.

He’s probably not the person Cere wants us to meet, though. That’s a Jedi! A great warrior. For sure.

(I think I’m funny)

At the vault, we learn that BD-1 is, in fact, the person Cere wants us to meet. In fairness to Cal, though, there is also technically a Jedi. Technically.

BD-1 contains encrypted messages from Jedi Master Eno Cordova, who has hidden the holocron we’re looking for. In order to find it, he wants us to follow in his footsteps. Thus follows one of my favourite scenes for Cal, but this post is already going to be too long so I’ll spare anyone who’s made it this far that particular ramble. Cal and BD-1 officially team up, find some more clues, access a couple of Master Cordova’s video diaries, and head back to the ship.

I will now proceed to exercise incredible restraint and move on to the next section rather than giving you a play-by-play of BD-1’s every move for the rest of the game. I would say 'you’re welcome', but you’re missing out on BD-1, so.

The Burgeoning Friendship

I want to emphasise how constantly present BD-1 is in JFO’s story. Not only is he literally present on Cal’s back for the vast majority of the game, but he’s also constantly interacting with both Cal and the player.

For one, there’s all those mechanics I mentioned earlier. Every time we look at the map, heal damage, or find something new, JFO is drawing our attention to BD-1. Granted, some actions are less obvious than others—we don’t pause in the middle of any given battle to show a long ‘BD-1 gives Cal a healing stim’ animation, and rightfully so—but when we’re just running around the map, BD-1 manages to feel like a character in his own right. He gets excited when Cal finds more healing stims (or literally any box for him to jump into), he runs around to show us things, he’s got his own adorable little idle fidget animations, the whole shebang. Mechanically he pretty much ends up functioning as a secondary player character.

Teamwork!

There’s also a bunch of incidental dialogue between Cal and BD as we run around. Cal likes to comment on what’s going on—be it a new force echo, a distant objective, or even just his thoughts and feelings about whatever is happening at the time. It’s a good way to keep an audience in touch with a character, but it can feel a bit weird to have a character start talking to the air about whatever it is the devs/writers want the player to know right now. Enter BD-1! Now Cal is talking to the cute robot buddy, which is incredibly relatable.

I, too, would tell this little guy all of my deepest darkest secrets.

BD-1’s trustworthy face aside, it’s also a good design choice! Now not only do we have a way to naturally insert whatever information Cal needs to deliver at any given time, we can turn that information into character beats for both parties. Cal and BD respond to each other, and so both of them feel more like independent characters who are present in and reacting to their circumstances. It helps keep us immersed in the narrative even when we’ve temporarily left the narrative behind to attempt the same jumping puzzle 15 times in our endless quest for ponchos.

My compulsion to give Cal as many ponchos as his little heart desires aside, Cal and BD’s conversations are really effective at keeping the player involved in what Cal is feeling. Some of my favourite moments are when BD-1 checks in with Cal while they explore the crashed Venator (ow), or when the two of them find Cordova’s old workshop. There’s definitely more, but I’ll be honest I have neither the time nor the energy to play or watch through the entire game to find it. If you’re reading this, though: you absolutely should. It’s such a good game.

Where was I?

Right! Narrative!

I’ve spoken about gameplay, but we really see BD-1’s narrative presence in cutscenes. He’s constantly involved in every story beat, even if sometimes he gets a little distracted.

He's very worried about your salt intake, Greez

BD-1 cares about our quest and about our characters. He has fun hijacking an AT-AT, and intervenes to help Cal when a fight is getting a bit dicey

To outline the full extent of BD-1’s involvement in the narrative would be to outline the whole narrative, and I swear I am trying to keep this post to a somewhat readable length, so I won’t do that. But I want to highlight these moments. They’re moments that get us attached to our characters, and moments that build the story. They draw us in to the relationship between Cal and BD-1, and also in a sense build a relationship between BD-1 and the player. I know that when I play JFO, I’ll often talk to BD-1 myself. If he hops off of Cal’s shoulder to look at something, I get excited too. NG+ removing all of the chests may make completing every corner of the game more convenient, but sometimes I’ll start again from scratch just to let BD have his fun. One of the benefits of games as a narrative medium is how involved the player is in the story—even at its most linear, the player is still an active participant. Another benefit to a game like JFO is the length. More is not always better, but in this case Respawn uses the player’s time well. No matter what we’re doing, we’re interacting with the world and the characters—and time spent interacting is time spent building a connection.

All this is to say that by the time we take our little detour via bounty hunter coliseum, I am right there with Cal panicking about our little friend

Those monsters

Dathomir and Ilum: The Payoff

This section is going to be hard for me to write coherently, mainly because whenever I think about this part of the game my brain stops forming words and instead descends into incoherent screeching interspersed with playbacks of various moments. I have to take a minute before I even go to Dathomir because I know what’s coming. I love this game so much and this sequence wrecks me every time.

I’ll do my best though!

Cal and BD have been through a lot together by this point. They’ve joined a rebellion, fought Inquisitors and delved into ancient ruins. They’ve been hunted by the Empire and by bounty hunters. We’ve done all that with them, too. As we go to Dathomir, Cal is wrestling with a lot of things. He’s back to the level he was at before the Purge, but he’s still hurting and traumatised.

I could talk at length about Dathomir, but this is a post about BD-1 and I am ostensibly trying to keep this somewhat concise.

(laughs in over 2500 words so far)

It is on Dathomir that things come to a head. Cal has a flashback of the events of the Purge, then faces a vision of his dead Master Tapal. When he comes to, his lightsaber—the one passed on to him by Jaro Tapal as he died—is broken. He is forced to flee Dathomir, and returns to Cere and Greez on the Mantis.

It’s a heartbreaking sequence. The player is right there with him throughout—we are high-fiving the trooper who teases Cal. We are navigating the vents of the Venator as clone troopers hunt us down. We are watching Jaro Tapal die defending Cal, and then we are fighting a vision who verbalises what Cal has been feeling this whole time—he has failed. His master died because he was weak and slow and useless. He can’t save the Jedi Order. He isn’t fit to wield his Master’s saber, and he isn’t fit to be a Jedi.

BD-1 is not there for any of it.

BD-1 has been with us for practically the entire game. In every cutscene I can remember, he’s been involved. He’s been running around doing his thing, or peeking over Cal’s shoulder. In this sequence, he is not present. He’s not there in the flashback, and he’s not there when we fight Jaro Tapal. He is present when the vision ends—but not really. He’s positioned so that we can barely see him behind Cal’s head.

Cal goes through all this alone.

(I will note that having now watched the scene a few times with special focus on BD-1, it does look as if he’s watching the rest of the room? Which gives me the impression that he’s tried to get through to Cal, realised he’s not responsive, and decided to watch his back while he deals with his Trauma-Based Force Stuff. Which. Ow. That’s so cute but he must have been so worried.)

It’s not until after Cal starts to leave that we check back in with BD-1. He sounds wrecked. And BD-1 can’t help.

The saddest wooo

We now proceed through a conversation with Cere and also, incidentally, several tissues.

Ow.

But! There’s hope! New goal: Get Cal a new kyber crystal to replace the broken one, then everything will be fixed and we’ll be ok.

After some more troubles, because poor Cal can’t catch a break, we finally get to the crystal. Cal seems upsettingly close to freezing to death, but we’ve made it!

And then the crystal breaks.

Cal gives up.

Like, it’s-open-for-interpretation-but-I’m-pretty-sure-he’s-just-decided-to-lie-there-until-he-dies gives up.

not pictured: my distressed yelling

And then: Eno Cordova speaks, and BD-1 enters the frame. “Failure is not the end, my friend.” It’s Cordova’s words, but BD-1 is playing the recording. BD-1 is encouraging Cal. Cal doesn’t really believe him.

So BD-1 shows Cal Master Eno Cordova’s final recording:

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Look, I am trying my best to be something resembling coherent here but. SCREAMS.

S C R E A M S

I could talk at length about how much I love this whole scene but I have been basically just recounting for a while now so I will be brief.

This scene completely reframes BD-1 as a character. He was already more than just a cute mechanics delivery system, but in this scene we learn that he chose to have his memories erased, and also that he chooses to believe in Cal. His faith in Cal gives Cal faith in himself, so he gets up and keeps fighting.

Now please excuse me while I cry a little more.

The First Meeting Again: What Makes Us Who We Are

One thing I really want to highlight from the above scene is that line from Eno Cordova:

“Only with a trusted connection will your memories be restored.”

I know it’s already pretty thoroughly emphasised by the game itself, but I didn’t quite understand its full impact on Cal’s journey and the themes of JFO until I replayed the game.

Remember that scene way back on Bogano where BD-1 injured his leg and Cal fixed it?

When I first played, I found it a little odd that BD-1 scanned Cal here. Why not earlier? Why now? I also thought it was a bit of a clunky story moment—Cal has already indicated that he’s going to the vault. Why are they repeating that goal here?

Because Cal fixed his leg.

BD-1 was hurting, and Cal helped, and so the first memory was unlocked—a drive to get to the vault and show him the way forward.

It’s a sweet little moment, and it’s cool to understand it better on a replay, but I think it’s also a moment that’s core to the themes of the game. On Dathomir, Cal’s fears are revealed: he is no Jedi. On Ilum, he gives up.

And then BD-1 says: you were a Jedi all along.

It’s been a repeated refrain throughout JFO: we are who we are because we choose to keep going. Jaro Tapal tells Cal that failing and getting up is the only way to succeed. Cere says “it’s the choice to keep fighting that makes us who we are.” Cordova says “Hope will always survive in those who continue to fight.”

Cal has been doubting himself ever since his Master died. He’s been hiding, cut off from the force and from his people. But over and over we see him choosing to help. He helps Prauf on Bracca, knowing it could cost him his life. He helps BD-1 on Bogano, just because he can. He helps Saw Gererra’s fighters and the Wookies on Kashyyk, because they need it. He struggles and he messes up, but over and over he chooses to help. To quote another piece of Star Wars media: His compassion leaves a trail. BD-1 shines a light on that trail.

Respawn did not have to go as hard as they did with BD-1. He’s a cute little droid who delivers some mechanics in a cool diegetic way. They could have stopped there. Instead, they use BD-1 to enrich the story and the characters, and to drive home one of the the major themes of the game: how we work out who we are when everything has fallen apart.

In the end, our gang won’t rebuild the Jedi Order. In that sense, they’ve failed. But each and every one of them is fighting. They’re holding on to hope, and sharing it with one another. It’s what makes them who they are. And by being who they are—in Cal’s case, choosing to be a Jedi, they have won a victory, even if they fail.

Man I love this game.

#jedi: fallen order #bd-1 #jfo #sorry it took so long!!! but thank you for asking!!!!!#I love this game SO MUCH #and I haven't had much energy for Being Excited About Stuff recently #so this was a nice opportunity :D

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2nd2ndalto · 1 year

Text

Goes To My Head

Written for the @writers-choice prompt "the droid you're looking for"

Title is from Red, Red Wine by UB40

___

Nico wakes well after midnight to the sound of pounding on his cabin door. He’s on his feet in an instant, sword in hand. He’s been woken like this a few times over the year that he’s stayed at camp, and it’s never once been good news.

He approaches the door silently, barely breathing, craning his neck in an attempt to peer out the window without being seen.

There’s a thump outside, then muffled conversation, and… giggling? Frowning, Nico takes a step closer to the door.

“Hey, Nico?” a voice calls softly. “It’s Cecil. I’ve got Will with me. You in there?”

Nico pulls the door open, squinting at the two boys on his doorstep. There’s Cecil, looking a bit exasperated, propping up a wobbly-looking Will, who’s beaming brightly. His blonde hair is particularly messy, shining like a halo in the moonlight.

“Nico!” Will exclaims happily, “I missed you!” He lunges from Cecil to Nico, who suddenly finds himself supporting most of the other boy’s weight. Nico stumbles, just managing to catch the taller boy around the waist.

“Whoa there, sunshine,” he says, startled. Will smells like campfire and something else sweet and sharp… maybe rubbing alcohol? Or vodka.

“Are you drunk?” Nico asks, now fairly sure this isn’t a world-ending emergency, at least judging from the other boys’ demeanor.

“Yeah, he really, really is,” Cecil grimaces. “Sorry to wake you, man. I can’t take him back to his cabin in this state. Do you mind keeping him here?”

Will is warm against Nico’s side, all long limbs and vodka breath. He giggles and sways, and the shorter boy gives up on supporting him, doing his best to lower his friend to the floor without dropping him. He’s never seen Will quite this incapacitated before.

Nico sighs, eyeing the heap of Will at his feet. “Yeah, I guess. What happened? Thought you guys were just doing popcorn and Star Wars tonight.”

When he’d left the Big House hours ago, Cecil and Will had been in the midst of a Star Wars marathon, but there hadn’t been any booze in sight. Tired and losing interest in their endless deep dives, Nico had excused himself and gone to bed.

Cecil pulls a face. “Connor and Travis showed up. You know. We went down to the beach and one thing led to another.”

Nico nods. It’s not entirely unexpected. There’s usually someone sneaking booze into camp on any given summer weekend, and the Stolls are the most common culprits. Will doesn’t usually partake quite this much, but there’s a first time for everything.

“I don’t really have anywhere to put him,” Nico says doubtfully. Most of the Hades cabin is currently under construction, and there’s really only one usable bed. He nudges Will with his foot. Will wraps his arms around Nico’s leg and hums happily.

Cecil shrugs, grinning. “I wouldn’t worry about it. He looks comfortable.”

Will does, actually, curled up in an overlarge hoodie on the floor. He gives Cecil a sleepy thumbs-up. “I love you, Cecil,” Will mumbles.

“Love you too, dude,” Cecil says. He gives Nico an apologetic look. “You sure you don’t mind?”

Nico sighs. “It’s fine Cecil, don’t worry about it.”

Nico lowers himself to the floor beside Will as the cabin door closes, carefully extricating his ankle from Will’s grasp.

“I’m so drunk,” Will says sincerely, gazing up at Nico with wide eyes. He seems to be having trouble focusing on Nico’s face.

Nico nods. “You sure are. How come?”

“Dunno. Connor gave me this stuff that tasted like strawberries. So it was like strawberries but also vodka. But like strawberries. Like…” Will blinks, then reaches out to grasp Nico’s arm. “Whoa, how come your cabin’s spinning?”

Nico snorts. “I think that’s you, dork.”

“Oh. Right.” Will sighs, closing his eyes. There’s silence for a long moment. Nico would think the other boy had fallen asleep, except that Will keeps his fingers wrapped around Nico’s wrist, his thumb stroking softly against Nico’s skin.

“Are you feeling sick? Do you need a puke bucket?” Nico asks.

“No, ‘m okay,” Will mumbles. “Took some ambrosia. Probably won’t puke.”

At least there’s that. Nico watches the other boy, wondering what to do with him. There’s probably no harm in leaving him here on the floor. He’s not sure Will’s capable of moving much further anyway.

“I’m so drunk,” Will groans suddenly, rolling onto his back.

Nico nods. “Yeah, you said.”

“I don’t wanna be so drunk anymore. Stupid Stolls. I just wanted to watch Star Wars.”

Will suddenly fixes Nico with an intense gaze, looking far more lucid than Nico thought him capable of in this state. “Hey, how come you left?” he says.

Nico shrugs. “I don’t know. I was tired. You and Cecil seemed to be having a good time.”

Will’s brow furrows. “Were we making you feel left out? I never wanna make you feel left out, Nico,” he says earnestly.

Nico can’t help smiling at that. “No, you never make me feel that way. I swear, I was just tired. I wasn’t feeling The Force.”

“I’m always feeling The Force,” Will says gravely.

Nico smiles fondly. “Yeah, I know.”

Will’s tried, doggedly, over the last year, to share his fervor for Star Wars with Nico. And Nico appreciates that Will wants to include him, but he honestly just can’t get into it. Every time Will puts one of the movies on, Nico’s mind starts drifting. But the movies are always paired with Will’s sunny energy, and Will’s enthusiastic commentary, and just… Will. So it’s hard to mind too much.

“I’m really wiped,” Nico tells the other boy, patting his shoulder. “I’m gonna go back to bed, okay? Are you sleeping here on the floor? I can grab you a blanket…”

Will immediately shakes his head, trying and failing to sit up. “No, ‘m sleeping with you.”

“Oh really,” Nico says flatly.

“Yeah.” Will nods vigorously, then clasps his hands to his head. “Ow. But you gotta help me ‘cause I don’t think my legs work.”

“Gods,” Nico sighs. “Fine.” He crouches closer to Will, manhandling him into an almost-sitting position and grabbing one of Will’s arms to haul it over his shoulder.

They make it to standing, somehow. Will’s not that heavy, but he’s doing a phenomenally poor job of supporting his own weight, and he’s a good six inches taller than Nico. It’s not really fair, honestly. Every time Nico achieves another hard-won inch of height, the height gods seem to bestow two inches on this blonde idiot.

Thankfully, it’s not far to the bed, and Nico deposits the other boy unceremoniously onto the mattress.

One of Will’s legs is hanging off the bed, and with great difficulty he manages to shift it. He’s still precariously near the edge, though, and Nico tries in vain to shove him over another inch or two. Finally giving up, Nico climbs over the other boy to lie down against the wall. There’s a long moment of peace.

“Sorry,” Will mumbles suddenly.

Nico opens his eyes. Will’s managed to roll himself over. He’s inches away, staring at Nico in the dark.

“For what?”

“Bothering you. Waking you up.”

“It’s fine, I really don’t mind,” Nico assures him. “Just don’t puke in my bed, okay?”

“I won’t.”

Nico closes his eyes again. His mind is just starting to drift when Will’s voice jolts him back into consciousness again.

“Travis tried to kiss me.”

“Hmm? Oh.”

That’s… surprising. Nico’s never had the impression that Travis had any particular interest in Will. Or in guys at all, for that matter. But he’ll readily admit he’s not the best at reading people. He gazes at the blonde boy in his bed. Will looks… guarded. Or maybe like he’s… waiting for Nico to say something?

“Um,” Nico says blankly.

Will nods, as if that’s exactly the response he was expecting.

“I told him I didn’t want to. Because I have a crush on you,” Will says matter-of-factly. Then his eyes go wide. “Shit. You were the one that I wasn’t supposed to tell that to.”

Nico presses his lips together, suppressing a laugh. Drunk Will is kind of cute. “It’s okay,” he says. “I won’t tell anyone.”

Will lets out an exaggerated sigh of relief. “Cool, thanks,” he says.

The thing about Travis is surprising. The drunken crush confession isn’t, really. At this point Nico had assumed that both he and Will had a crush and each knew the other had it. It’s just that neither has actually done anything about it yet. It’s kind of nice to hear Will say it, even if Nico’s not sure the other boy will remember any of this tomorrow.

“Don’t tell my mom,” Will says suddenly, his strawberry vodka breath wafting into Nico’s face.

Will suddenly looks wide awake again, his eyes boring into Nico’s. Nico’s never spoken a single word to Will’s mother.

“What - um. Don’t tell your mom you… have a crush on me?” Nico can feel his face heating. Gods, it’s really hard to put those words out into the world. At least while entirely sober.

Will rolls his eyes. “No silly, she already knows that. Don’t tell her I’m drunk.”

Nico bites his lip. “I won’t say a word.”

“Kay. You’re the best.” Will beams at him, then closes his eyes again.

Nico takes a deep breath. Okay. This isn’t so bad. They’ve slept near each other before. Never quite in the same bed. But it’s fine. They can laugh about it tomorrow. Or more accurately, Nico’s planning on teasing Will about this for the rest of his life.

And then suddenly Will’s hand is in his. Nico’s stomach flip-flops in an extremely enthusiastic manner, considering how exhausted as the rest of him is.

“Room still spinning?” he asks softly.

“Not as much,” Will whispers. “That time I just wanted to hold your hand.”

“Oh. Okay.” Nico smiles into the dark cabin. It’s nice, the feeling of Will’s hand in his. It kind of warms him from the inside out. He closes his eyes. Again.

Then - “hey, Solace.” Nico blinks into the suddenly not-so-darkness. “You’re glowing.”

“Oh!” Will opens his eyes, looking startled. “Sorry.”

“No, it’s okay, just - I haven’t seen you do that before. Why are you glowing?”

“I um…” Will swallows, looking embarrassed.

Nico frowns. “Is it like, a drunk thing?”

“No, I think it’s just… you make me happy,” Will whispers.

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“Do - do I make you happy too?” Will asks tremulously, and gods, really? It’s like three in the morning.

Nico squeezes his hand. “Of course you do. Idiot.”

Will beams.

“Go to sleep, nerd.” Nico kicks him gently.

Will closes his eyes, still smiling.

“Nico?”

“Mm?”

“You’re the droid I was looking for,” he mumbles earnestly.

Nico blinks. “I have no idea what that means.”

But Will doesn’t answer, finally seeming to have fallen asleep. He’s still glowing softly, Nico’s hand clasped in his.

“Sweet dreams, night light,” Nico whispers.

#my writing #nico di angelo #solangelo #will solace #percy jackson and the heroes of olympus #writer's choice #one shot #fluff #rated teen for alcohol use

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laureliciousdefinition · 2 years

Text

Let You In | Din Djarin X Reader

Summary: you’d always let him in, whether you liked it or not.

Rating: mostly T but let’s say 18+ just to be safe!

Warnings/tags: brief smut, a lot of angst, heartbreak, not really canon compliant bc Star Wars canon is hard to keep up with<3

A/N: this is an extremely self indulgent piece based off of Laufey’s song “Let You Break My Heart Again” because I feel like din just fits so well into it. It’s a beautiful and gut wrenching piece that everyone should listen to!

Crossposted on ao3

It never meant anything. You were both young- he was a few years your senior and had that undeniable charm most boys that age possessed, all roaming hands and whispered compliments that made your head spin. You were quick to swoon for him, of course, but you rerouted your thoughts to purely infatuation and reminded yourself that it was only sex between the two of you. Just two people seeking relief from the constant noise and pressure that never settled with your lines of work. Despite this, the sex never really felt meaningless to you, and you hoped he secretly shared the sentiment somewhere under that helmet; he made you feel understood. In that first year of meeting he grew to know your body better than you ever could’ve. Took you apart and put you back together again as many times as he could.

“Fuck- ah, oh my god,” you breathed out, perched on bent elbows with your head thrown back after your neck muscles couldn’t take it anymore.

Though you couldn’t see him, lights off and windows covered in the tiny apartment, you could feel him. He braced one of your legs over his shoulder and relentlessly swirled his hot tongue over you.

“Yeah?” You heard him respond, pulling away from your center.

Blindly, you reached your hand back out to him, lightly smacking his cheek and ear in the process, before grabbing the back of his head and pushing it back against you. You could feel him chuckle, continuing his ministrations. He loved to take you apart this way before doing anything else; you suspected he enjoyed the power dynamic of making you putty in his hands. Sometimes he’d let you switch the roles, but he always seemed to beat you to the punch before you could, making you cry out and thrash against his tongue until you begged him to stop. He was unfairly good at it.

When you’d both collapsed into your bed that evening, thoroughly satiated and spent, he was holding you from behind. You desperately yearned to see his face but you’d never force it, not when you knew how much it meant to him, so you settled for these moments. It was just as vulnerable for him- helmet-less behind you, nose buried deep into your hair and voice unfiltered.

“I took another job for the month,” he’d said, filling the silence.

You traced a pattern over his bare hand with your thumb. “Where? I’ve been on the hunt for new jobs for weeks and it’s all been scraps,” you asked incredulously, voice still hoarse from your previous activities.

You almost missed the way he stilled behind you.

“Ankhural.” He answered quietly.

Your brows furrowed slightly. “That’s all the way in the mid-rim. Kinda far, don’t you think?”

Din took a moment before replying, the silence hurting your ears. “The pay is worth it. Tracking down some ex-dignitary, I think.”

As he explained, you reasoned with yourself that you weren’t upset. Why would you be? The two of you couldn’t stay on these dusty outer-rim planets forever. This was what you did- go out, collect bounties, get paid. Not a line of work suited for people who liked to stay still for long. Yet the two of you had fallen into a pattern, combing through bounties in the rim together, sometimes even sharing your pay. In its own strange way, it had become almost a partnership, though neither of you would admit that. You both had your routines, and quickly folded into each other’s. Maybe it wasn’t normal, but it gave you a sense of peace.

You hummed and nodded in response, though he couldn’t see it in the dark.

Another lapse of silence passed, much longer than before.

“I’m gonna miss you.” You whispered, tucking his hand with yours into your chest.

He didn’t answer, only breathed deeper into his slumber.

———

The next time you see him is seven months later. The reunion was less than stellar, you giving him the cold shoulder when he had the nerve to saunter into that cantina. Part of you was mad to even see him, another part embarrassed that you were still on the backwater planet while he was off surely having adventures and taking in the galaxy. But more than that, you were heartbroken. It was a feeling you didn’t recognize until about three months in when you realized he probably wasn’t coming back, and you began to mourn things that never were.

Romance was never in the cards for the two of you yet you found yourself weeping for him at night. Weeping because he could be dead for all you knew, and you’d never shared your feelings because you knew he didn’t reciprocate. Because he left without saying goodbye- why would he have? You were hardly even a friend in his eyes, just someone to share the load with, you convinced yourself.

“Thought you were dead.”

You couldn’t even look at the man next to you, instead burying your face into your drink.

He didn’t respond for a moment. “Listen, I-“

“You could’ve gotten in contact with me. Told me you hadn’t been shot dead in an alley somewhere. Anything. But you left me in the dark for seven months.” You kept your eyes down, but the anger was clearly seeping into your tone.

“I’m sorry, I just-“

“Seven. Months.” You interrupted again.

A sigh filtered out through his helmet. Neither of you spoke for a moment, daring the other to make the next move. He chose to speak first again.

“I brought you something,” he said carefully.

You couldn’t help the scoff you let out. You didn’t respond, but you cut your eyes to him for the first time since his arrival. He still wore his old chest plate, and a very small (but admittedly very petty) part of yourself briefly celebrated the fact that he hadn’t made enough to get any more parts of his beskar armor. Was it immature? Yes. Did that stop you? Absolutely not.

In his hands was a small box, plain and unassuming. He shifted it towards you, and you waited a moment before rolling your eyes and deciding you couldn’t handle not knowing what it was.

Inside the box was a small metal pin, just a bit larger than your thumbnail, cut in the shape of one of the flowers native only to your home planet. As you turned it over in your fingers, it caught the dim lights above you, and you instantly recognized the material.

Beskar.

You stared at what you assumed was his eye line, blinking.

“I don’t… I don’t know what to say,” you whispered, barely audible over the chatter of the cantina.

“Can we go somewhere more private? To talk?” He asked, shifting towards you.

You shakily inhaled, nodding. “Yeah… yeah.”

You’d walked silently back to your small apartment, the short journey feeling endless under the weight of his gift and presence. You settled on opposite corners of your bed, fiddling idly with the hem of your shirt while he removed his larger weapons and set them carefully in the corner.

“I’m sorry for leaving for so long.” He said flatly.

You swallowed, nodding as you spoke. “I just… I just thought I, this, meant more to you than that. Maybe not.”

He turned his torso to you. “What do you mean?”

You gave him an exasperated smile. “I mean, you know I care about you. You can’t just fuck off for that long and not expect me to be a little upset.”

Din’s shoulders sagged slightly. You could feel the guilt snaking it’s way through his body and while you were still mad, you also just wanted to hold him.

After sitting silently for a moment, you scooted a little closer on the bed. “I like the gift,” you said softly.

“I know you miss your home. You mentioned it once a while ago.”

A pang shot through your heart; you did miss your home planet, a place you were no longer welcome at after your family disagreed with your lifestyle choices. You’d whispered this sentiment to Din one evening when you were laying in your post-coital states, idly tracing each other’s bodies and sharing stories. You weren’t even sure he was listening- you usually did more of the sharing. He liked to keep himself walled off, even from you, the person he was probably closest to (not that that was saying much.)

“I do. Thank you, it… it means a lot.”

He shifted closer to you now. “I’m gonna stay here for a while,” He started. “Got some repairs to make to the ship. And,” he stretched up to his side and flicked the light switch by the bed, blanketing the room in darkness. When he spoke again, his words were hushed, voice unfiltered, and his mouth was now inches away from your ear.

“I’ve got some apologies to make.”

———

To his credit, Din did stay around for about two months after he returned. It was a growth time for the two of you, you working through these feelings you had and finally becoming okay with the place the two of you were, and him slowly (slowly) opening himself more to you outside of bounties and sex. Things were peaceful again- briefly.

In those seven months he was gone he’d made some connections with a guild, and the pay was beyond handsome for him because he was so good at his job. You almost couldn’t blame him when he left again at the promise of opportunities he simply couldn’t pass up. Almost.

While this time stung a little less, you still found an ache in your chest that you couldn’t seem to escape. Why couldn’t he just stay again? Why did you care so much? Clearly the two of you shared some sort of feelings for each other- feelings you were willing to explore, but he was apparently not.

So to drown your sorrows you’d been picking up any job you could take, and along the way met a couple different people to ease the pain. Kat’aa, a twi’lek woman who loved to dance and made you laugh harder than you ever had, but ultimately you knew the two of you would never work. Tiero, a nice human man that didn’t say much but instead showed his affection with a devilish tongue, who you broke things off with when that was all he wanted to do. There were a few others here and there in the year and some change that passed before you saw Din again, but none of them ever quite filled the hole in your heart.

And because of this, seeing him again only served to reopen the wound.

You took him in, of course; he was injured, badly enough that you weren’t even sure how he managed to fly without passing out. Once you’d gotten him bandaged up as best as you could with only household medical supplies, he collapsed onto your floor with a grunt and you briefly wondered if he had just passed out. But he grabbed your hand, tugging so you came down to him, and you obliged.

No words were spoken that night.

———

After he’d shown up injured, he left again the next morning. You’d maybe spoken five words, and this time instead of heartbreak, you were pissed. Who did he think he was, using you like that? Acting a little selfishly, you threw a tantrum within the walls of your apartment, screaming and throwing things until you were out of breath. You couldn’t help it, you were just so sick of being used like this. How was it fair that you poured so much into him and he only have a fraction back?

He did, however, return only a day later. In fact, upon seeing him you realized he hadn’t even left the planet, just went back to his ship. It was fair, you supposed- this planet wasn’t necessarily unsafe, but definitely not the safest either. You felt a bit silly for your meltdown, but you kept that to yourself.

Even if you wanted to share it with him, you were immediately silenced when he returned with a small, green… thing tucked into his arm.

Though he hadn’t shared much with you, you did know his foundling story, and that they were important to his culture, however you’d be lying if you ever saw him as someone who would take in a child. That’s too much commitment and responsibility- he already has enough on his own plate.

“I’m on a mission to return him to his people.” He’d explained, sitting on the floor with you in the living area. The little green thing, who you simply called ‘the child’, toddled around curiously.

“I found him a few months back, and- hey, don’t touch that.” He interrupted himself calmly to direct the child away from some books you’d collected that were sitting on a shelf in the corner.

You couldn’t help but laugh at the man before you being so parental. The man who you knew as a fierce bounty hunter and an even more fierce lover. Duality of man, you supposed. As you watched him interact with the child you felt your anger melting, albeit against your will. You wanted to be mad at him, scream, give him a piece of your mind, but you couldn’t- not when you watched him carefully feed the youngling before excusing himself to your bedroom to eat his own dinner privately. Something was different about him now.

After knocking to confirm he was safe, you entered the bedroom, settling in behind him on the bed and working your hands into the part of his shoulders that you could reach without armor getting in the way.

“He’s passed out on my couch,” you explained, working at the tension.

Din groaned beneath you. “I’m sorry to intrude with him, but-“

“Shhh,” you interrupted. “We’ll talk later. Right now I just want to make you feel good.”

He shivered beneath you. “Okay,” he muttered.

You took each other apart multiple times that night, any of your previous feelings for him returning tenfold, but you couldn’t care. He put you into such a state of bliss, better than any of your other lovers could’ve dreamed of. He knew you. Inside and out.

He’d even kissed you goodbye that morning, waking you before he left. You didn’t know when you would see him again, but as he left that day, something told you it wouldn’t be long before it was back.

———

He returned several months later, this time no child in tow and a much heavier heart in his chest. Perhaps he was using your sex as a distraction, but you found yourself willingly giving it to him. When you laid in bed that evening, his back pressed to yours, you bit your lip before speaking.

“Do.. do you wanna talk about it?” You asked softly.

“No.”

You sighed. “Okay, just know that I’m here. I’m willing to listen.”

Several minutes of silence covered the room. You closed your eyes, prepared to sleep, when he finally piped up.

“A part of me is missing now.”

Your heart shattered for him. You of all people knew how hard it was for him to allow others in. You were just barely in yourself. And to have that ripped away… you could imagine the feeling, you kept that to yourself though.

You rolled over so your face was pressed between his broad shoulder blades. You wrapped your arms around him, searching for his fingers, and intertwined them.

Maybe none of it was ever supposed to mean anything. You’d been around long enough to know better than to get attached- and yet, you let him back in every single time. He had a magnetic pull on you, one you were helpless against no matter how hard you tried to escape. And a part of you reveled in this- you loved being wanted by him in at least some capacity. Maybe you weren’t supposed to end up together, at least not in the traditional sense. But something about him was addictive, almost a base instinct- and it made you think that maybe, just maybe, things would change eventually.

And so, until then, your door would remain open for him.

——

Feedback and interactions always appreciated <3

Tagging the usual pals! Lmk if you wanna be tagged in any future Din stuff/anything else!

@iamskyereads @wheresarizona @guess-my-next-obsession @grippingbeskar @jedifarmerr @wildemaven @kirsteng42

#din djarin x reader #din djarin x you #din djarin imagine #din djarin fanfiction #mandalorian x reader #mandalorian x you #mandalorian fanfic #mandalorian smut #Spotify

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www-razaya4life · 8 days

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Hope Shines Bright: Dark Matter Alt. Ending #2

[Takes place during Razer’s memorial service on Odym]

Somewhere in the afterlife, Razer is joined by his long dead wife. “Ilana, c-can it really be you?” Ilana smiles warmly as she gently brushes his cheek. “Yes beloved, it’s me.” Razer, practically in tears, embraces her for the first time in what felt like a millennia. “I told you I came back for you.” He said, forcing a half smile. Ilana chuckled, “And you most certainly did.” Razer’s half smile falls and he immediately recalls the events prior to her death. “I am so sorry for not listening to you on Volkreig. You were right about everything.” Ilana reciprocates the hug and quietly shushes him. “It’s okay Razer, I know your heart was in the right place.” “No Ilana, it wasn’t. I was so obsessed with protecting you that I didn’t stop to consider the consequences for my actions.” Ilana’s face fell as well. “No you didn’t and for that alone, I would’ve been very disappointed in you.” Razer hung his head in shame; his self-loathing beginning to emerge.

“But…” Ilana started, causing him to perk up a bit. “I’ve seen how far you’ve come since our time on Volkreig. Granted you’ve made some mistakes…” Razer knew exactly what she meant. He could well remember receiving that dreaded Red Lantern ring seconds after Ilana’s death. “However…” She went on, “that’s not to say you’ve done everything in your power to right the wrongs you’ve caused. I’ve witnessed your personal growth from afar and I cannot be more proud of you.” For the first time in a long while, Razer genuinely smiled. “But…” Ilana stated. This caused Razer’s smile to fade. “Your time has not yet come.” “W-What?!” “I’m afraid you cannot join me here beloved.” “Why? Have I not changed for the better?” He asked, desperate for an answer. “You have beloved. But I’m afraid that you are needed elsewhere.” Razer looked at his late wife in disbelief. “More specifically, someone else needs you now more than ever.” She pulls back the veil to reveal a grieving Aya. Razer’s heart sinks at the sight of his true love in tears. “She is mourning you Razer and it is clear that you still love her.” Razer was worried that Ilana would become jealous. But to his surprise, she wasn’t. “Go to her Razer. Be with her.” “Are you certain Ilana?” “I am, beloved. But do not worry; when your time does come, I will always be with you.” Razer nodded knowingly as he slowly faded from the afterlife.

Back on Odym, as the funeral drudged on, something unexpected started to happen. A hand from Razer’s supposedly-lifeless corpse started twitching. Rapidly at first, but then it stayed perfectly upright. No-one noticed this, at first, until they could hear something from within the casket. It started in low and then began to grow:

“In fearful day…”

Upon sensing the creation of a new candidate, a rogue blue lantern levitates from Battery Temple and begins its descent down the mountainside.

“In raging night”

The ring hurdles past various flora and fauna surrounding the area at Mach-speed as it continues its autonomous pursuit.

“With strong hearts full as souls ignite”

Suddenly, with a whoosh and a zip, the ring rockets past the waning crowd of mourners. “Hey what’s that?!” One of them called out, pointing to the streak of blue light left in the ring’s wake. Everyone stopped what they were doing and watched in bewilderment as the blue lantern ring slipped effortlessly onto Razer’s finger.

“When all seems lost in the war of light”

Then, as if by magic, the former Red Lantern rose from his casket and ascended toward the heavens; only to stop halfway.

“Look to the stars where Hope shines Bright!”

As soon as that last line was uttered, Razer: the once fallen son of Volkreig, opened his eyes. Upon doing so, the entire area was immersed in an ethereal bluish-white glow; blinding nearly everybody in its proximity. “What’s going on Hal?” asked Carol, a slight tremble of fear in her voice. “We’re about to find out. Look!” Once the cascading light died down, all those in attendance stared in shock to discover whom it was. Razer slowly descended down until his feet touched the surface. The outfit he was currently wearing no longer had the Red Lantern symbol adorned on his chest, but instead it was the symbol of the Blue Lantern Corps. His original uniform had been fully bathed in a diamond bluish-white color scheme that radiated holy righteousness.

Razer stared down at his hands, contemplating his current situation. Everyone had crowded around to this miracle for themselves. But none were more taken aback than Aya. She carefully pushed herself to the front of the crowd and found herself struggling to comprehend what was transpiring. Then, without thinking, Aya cautiously edged herself toward the man whom was once thought dead. “R-Razer?” She asked, her voice barely a whisper. She reached out to touch him when suddenly he whipped around and glared at her. Tensions were understandably high and no-one said a word. Just then, Razer spoke up, “Aya…it’s me.” The surprising amount of warmth in his voice was almost inhuman. Aya didn’t know what to think. Could this possibly be the man whom she loved with all her heart?

The newly christened Blue Lantern sensed this and with a wave of his hand, he summoned a construct to bring over a blueish-purple lily that had been placed near his casket. He gently floated it into the palms of her hands; not a single petal out of place. Aya gazed at this very peculiar flower and thought, “Why would he choose this one?” Then she remembered how Razer had given her this particular flower when they had visited the ruins of his home back on Volkreig. It had become a symbol of new life taking root amidst the devastation that lay around it. This realization made her eyes light up as brightly as his new uniform. “I-It is you!” She managed to blurt out, her voice choked up with accompanying tears. Razer extends his hand and gentle caresses Aya’s cheek. The former crestfallen android takes hold of his hand and nestles into it; internally promising herself that she will never let him go.

No sooner had their fingers intertwined that the reality of this moment washed over them, overwhelming in its sheer intensity. Their eyes, pools of longing and love, spoke volumes of the trials they endured and the unyielding hope that sustained them through the darkest of nights. Each touch, each glance, ignited a flame that defied the constraints of mortality, burning brighter with every heartbeat. With trembling lips, they drew closer, their breaths mingling in the air, a silent symphony of anticipation and desire. In that moment, Odym faded away, leaving only the echo of their hearts, beating in unison; a rhythm that echoes through time itself. And then, as if drawn by an invisible force, their lips meet in a kiss that transcended the boundaries of life and death.

While they were kissing, the energy from Razer’s Blue Lantern ring starts to swirl around them before culminating into a glorious fireworks display that explodes around them. Everyone gasps in amazement as this wondrous spectacle illuminates, even in broad daylight. Once it concludes, everyone claps and cheers; even the Red Lanterns were shown to be impressed. Amidst the cheering, Razer whispers to Aya, “I am truly sorry for all that I put you through. I wasn’t lying when I said you have more of a soul than I ever had.” Aya smiles meekly. “For what it’s worth…” Razer continued, “You had every right to be angry. I dismissed your affections and kept you at arm’s length because of this.” Aya gazed up at her now revitalized lover. “Razer, while what you said is true, I have come to understand how multifaceted the concept of love truly is. It is an emotion that must understood in both its light and darkest forms.” “Be that as it may; the reason I said those things to you prior to your transformation is because I was confused and afraid.” “Afraid?” asked Aya, “Why?” “I had been in love with Ilana for so long that I become afraid of betraying her memory.” Aya bowed her head with solemn understanding. “As I said before, I saw your memories and felt your pain. But even in death, I would assume Ilana would want you to be happy.” Razer smirked, “Indeed she would have.”

There was a pregnant pause between the two. “Did you really mean what you said?” Aya asked, a twinge of doubt in her voice. Razer looked puzzled, “What did I say?” “That the reason you couldn’t kill me was because you had no hate in your heart for me. Only love.” Razer nodded. ‘Yes Aya, I meant every word of it. I could never hurt you; nor would I want to.” A small tear trickled down Aya’s cheek as the confirmation of her lover’s words resonated in her mind. “Which brings me to another query.” “What might that be?” asked Razer. “Can you ever forgive me?” Aya whimpered, her eyes shimmering with vulnerability and remorse. Razer, though taken aback by her words, held her close to his chest. “Aya, there is nothing to forgive. As I said, you had every right to attack me after the way I hurt you. If anything, I should be asking you for such a boon.” Now it was Aya’s turn to be taken aback. She had not expected Razer to be so even-tempered and calm. But seeing as though he was a changed man, Aya couldn’t stay mad at him. Instead, she stared up at the man whom she had fallen deeply in love with and said, “Of course I forgive you Razer.” “Then I guess you know me better than I thought.” Razer remarked. Aya let out a soft giggle before embracing her beloved in another passionate kiss.

It wasn’t long before the two lovers were greeted by a pair of familiar faces. It was Hal and Kilowog, accompanied by Carol who was too transfixed by the whole ordeal not to join them. “I’m glad to see you all have survived.” Razer said calmly. To his surprise, Kilowog said nothing. Instead, he pulled the young Blue Lantern into one of his famous bear hugs, to which he wholeheartedly reciprocated. “That was some display you put on just now kid.” Hal remarked. Razer rolled his eyes. “But…I sure am glad to have you back.” Hal said, holding out his hand. The new Blue Lantern smiled warmly as he firmly shook his leader’s hand with pride. As he did so, Razer glanced over at Carol with a perplexed look about him. “Who’s she Hal?” He asked, “Another of your earthling mates?” “That’s one way of putting it.” Said Carol. Hal commenced the introductions. “Razer, this is Carol Ferris: my former boss back on earth. Carol, this is Razer: a trusted member of my crew and one I’m glad to call…my friend.”

With this being said, both lanterns kindly shook hands. “Glad to finally meet the man who just came back from the dead.” Carol quipped. Razer chuckled, “It was…life changing to say the least.” “I’ll say.” Carol muttered. “So you must be the woman that Hal aimlessly drones on about.” “Yeah, I guess I am.” “I will never understand the appeal of getting into an intimate relationship with one’s superiors.” Razer remarked. “It’s complicated.” Hal called over. “What he means to say is, we’ve always had an unspoken bond between us. One made even more difficult when I became the head of my father’s company back home.” “And this made you want her even more?” Razer called over to Hal, trying to piece it all together. “Well…that was just a small perk that came with it.” Hal explained. “Oh yeah.” chortled Kilowog, “Hal’s always been a flirt when it comes to women...especially the high-ranking sort.” “Yeah, I got a glimpse of that back on Zamaron.” Carol huffed, remembering her first encounter with the Star Sapphires. “And as I told you, she was just a friend.” Hal retorted indignantly. “A friend who was trying to drug and/or imprison you.” Razer added. “True, but what woman wouldn’t want to imprison all this?” Hal boasted. “Oh boy.” Kilowog groaned as he face palmed himself. “Has he always been this vain?” Razer asked, eying Carol for information. “No.” She sighed dejectedly, “Sometimes, he’s much worse.” Both Razer and Kilowog looked at each other knowingly.

Hal, finally having enough of this mini ‘roast-fest’, decided to cut in. “Alright that’s enough out of you.” He said, briefly pushing Carol off to the side. “Guess it’s true what they say, ‘if you can’t stand the heat, stay out of the engine room.” Kilowog chimed in, looking very amused with Hal’s antics toward Carol. “It’s out of the kitchen actually.” Hal said, quickly correcting his sergeant. “Is she always like this?” asked Razer. “She can be quite determined when she wants to be.” Said Hal loftily. “But anyway, I think I can speak for both of us when I say it’s great to have you back Razer.” “It’s endearing to be back Hal and needless to say, I feel a lot better than how Kilowog looks.” The Green Lantern sergeant chuckled as he shook his head. “Always with the smart mouth.” “Hey, that’s Razer for you.” Hal shrugged.

For the rest of the day, the Interceptor crew mingled among the many Lantern factions that were present. When Razer encountered Bleez; Atrocitus’ former lieutenant, amidst the crowd, she had nothing but a look of restrained admiration upon her face. “I never thought I’d say this to an enemy of the Red Lanterns but…great to see alive Razer.” “Thank you Bleez. It must’ve been hard for you to say such a thing.” “Yeah well, don’t get used to it!” She snapped. Razer rolled his eyes, “Some things never change.” He thought as he continued his rounds. The young Blue Lantern met all sorts of people; many of them congratulated him for his phenomenal return while others asked him how it was possible. But Razer had the same answer: “I just…never lost hope.” Two faces stood back amidst the hectic crowd; both sporting grins and a warm sense of pride: Saint Walker and Ganthet. “Now do you see Saint Walker? How hope never truly dies.” “Indeed I do. The beauty of hope is life-everlasting and I do believe that brother Razer has finally found new purpose after all.”

THE END

#long live razaya #the sun will shine on us again #Easter fanfic #hope shines bright

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