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pastanest · 11 months

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if you’re wondering why I’m having to repost this, or why you were perhaps previously following me but no longer are, please refer to this post. I was able to retrieve this thanks to the very lovely friends who have relentlessly sifted through tumblr archives to recover them, thank you all so much!! ♡

A/N: I wrote all this Draco content YEARS ago, PLEASE do not hold it against me lol

Draco x non-house-specific!reader

Puppy Love

Draco’s POV

Much like many of my nights at Hogwarts, I find myself unable to sleep, and have resorted to walking around the castle until I tire myself out. The night air is calling to me from beyond the castle walls, and try as I might to ignore the whispers in the wind, I cannot resist the chance to enjoy another starlit sky. Smiling to myself, my usual slow walking pace is replaced by hurried footsteps, each step adding another spark to the fire of excitement that is igniting in my chest. As soon as I set foot outside, my smile widens into a broad grin, and after wandering just far enough to find a spot which I can successfully hide myself from any teachers patrolling the grounds, I take a seat on the cold grass, my pyjama’s only just being enough to keep my body above a temperature that would be too cold for me to stand. Bringing my knees up, I hold them loosely with in the crease of my elbows, clasping my hands together in the space between my calfs, my entire body relaxing as I tilt my head back to observe the countless precious prisms of light held greedily by the night sky that taunts me from above. A small rustle coming from within a bush a few feet away from where Im sitting startles me, and I jump back slightly. From the other side of the small shrub, I hear a pained, high pitched howl that pulls at my heartstrings in the most vulnerable way. Slowly bringing myself to my feet, I glance over the tight bundle of leaves to see a small black dog, sitting up straight with it’s back to me. With it’s pricked up ears, it almost appears like a miniature wolf. Sensing my presence, the dog stiffens and turns to face me, a curious and frightened expression etched into it’s features as the brightest pair of silver eyes bore into my own. I lift my foot to take a step towards the dog, but it cowers away from me, so instead I take a step back, and sit back down again in my previous position. Sure enough, the small dog gingerly crawls through the bush and comes out the other side, to stand beside me. I hold my hand out to it, and the dog inspects it carefully, sniffing at my palm tentatively, before nuzzling against it. Another smile takes over my face as I gently scratch behind the dog’s right ear. The dog suddenly jumps up excitedly, and rolls onto it’s back, sticking it’s tongue out the side of it’s mouth.

I cant help but laugh “Well, arent you a pretty girl!”

She barks up at me in approval, causing me to chuckle again as I rub her stomach. Almost immediately, I feel my heart unlocking itself from it’s burdened chains for this small, lovable creature, and it’s striking silver eyes.

“Do you have a name, little lady?” I question her as I take note of the lack of a collar around her neck, but obviously not expecting her to give me an answer that I can possibly understand. Could she be a stray?

She barks at me again, and I feel my heart sing as it falls further in love with this animal. The idea of a dog being a man’s best friend has never made much sense to me, I’ve always been more of a cat person, but this dog is changing my whole perspective in a matter of minutes.

An idea pops into my head, and I smile down at her.

“How about Lady?” I ask, and immediately the adorable black ball of fur jumps to her feet, and begins chasing her tail as she yips excitedly.

Feeling my eyes begin to get heavy, I start rationalising the situation in my head. However, given my tiredness, it is likely that my decision to carry Lady back to my dorm and place her at the foot of my bed, with the intension of taking full responsibility for her, was perhaps not my finest hour.

For the first time in what feels like my entire life, I wake up pleasantly, without the lingering claws of sleep trying to drag me back into the abyss. Sitting up in bed, I rub my eyes to fully wake myself up, and kick my legs out from under my covers, placing my feet on the floor as I rub the back of my neck. Glancing around the room, I see all of my fellow Slytherin boys fast asleep, but when my gaze lands on the end of my bed, I have to do a double take, and my blood runs cold. She’s gone. Without any further thought, I jump from my bed and start crawling around on the floor, looking underneath every bed to try and find her, before I notice that the dorm room door is ajar, and the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end.

I spend my entire Saturday morning running around the castle, relentlessly searching for her. The sound of me shouting her name as I bound down the corridors has undoubtedly given most of the students headaches, but now my voice is restricted to practically whispering, given Im searching the school library.

“Lady? Lady, where are you!?!” I call out quietly as I speed walk between every aisle of books.

A small girl, who I recognise to be (Y/N), perks up from her place at a desk located at the far end of the aisle Im now searching, but I pay her little attention as I crouch down to look beneath the stack of shelves. Sensing a presence beside me, I glance up to find (Y/N) standing next to me, staring down at me quizzically.

“What’re you doing Draco? Not to be rude, but you’re coming across as a bit of a nutter.” (Y/N) enquires, an air of innocent curiosity about her.

“Im trying to find my dog - well, technically I suppose she isnt mine, but I found her last night and she was all alone, so I decided to take her in. I took her to my room and by the time I woke up, she was gone.” Despite barely knowing (Y/N), I find myself quite suddenly comfortable enough around her to explain my endeavours in full detail.

“She wasnt a very big dog, definitely young too, she almost looked like a very small wolf, but with these bright silver eyes. I called her Lady. Have you seen her?” My voice rings with a tone of helplessness as I stand to my feet, trying not to acknowledge my slight insecurity caused by just how much I tower over the girl in front of me.

Her eyes widen, with an oddly familiar fear present in them, and I notice her quickly avoiding my gaze as she shifts her weight from foot to foot, laughing and coughing nervously.

“What are you doing that for?” I question, a little more harsh than I intended to be.

“I-I, uh, well…oh dear, I dont suppose I can really keep this from you now, can I? We cant talk about it here, though, I dont need anyone else knowing about this. Follow me.” (Y/N) walks past me, and gestures for me to follow her, but I shake my head.

“Im not going anywhere until I find Lady.” I tell her, with confidence.

Sighing, (Y/N) comes back over to me, and stares up at me with a focussed expression on her face. Time seems to slow down, and I watch in awe as the natural colour in her eyes begins to swirl, until it is replaced by that same striking silver. My jaw hangs open in shock, and when (Y/N) blinks, her eyes are back to normal.

“Follow me.” She instructs again, and this time I do so without question.

(Y/N) leads me outside, smiling and waving awkwardly at her friends, who are all staring at her in absolute horror as they notice me following behind her. She only stops walking when we’ve reached the place I found Lady the previous night. The wind blows through her hair as she stands with her back to me, evidently trying to hide her face.

“I didnt mean for you to see me last night, nobody usually does. Yesterday wasnt a good day for me at all, and I decided to venture out here to get some time to myself, just to sit. Maybe cry a little, if I needed to. But you found me, and now we’re in this mess.”

I frown, confusion consuming me, and an echo of the shock left over from seeing her eyes change, still holding me hostage.

“What are you talking about?” I question, feeling utterly dumbfounded for the first time in my life.

With a heavy sigh, (Y/N) turns around to face me, and Im immediately entranced by her eyes, which have once again transformed into that familiar silver.

“Im a Metamorphmagus, Draco. I can alter my physical appearance, I’ve been able to since I was a baby, both of my parents passed it down to me. While some people like me can change their hair colour on command, or temporarily adopt a feature of an animal, or even completely change their physical appearance, my family can all change themselves into animals at will. While my mother usually sticks within the realms of cat-like creatures, my father prefers birds, and I…I prefer wolves, and dogs.”

My lips part to speak, but no words fall from them, and the information I’ve just received is left hanging in the air, until (Y/N) decides to continue it, her head hanging low.

“If kids here found out about me, I’d be treated like a circus animal. So I must ask that you keep this between us, please.”

This time, words leave me before I have the chance to even process them.

“If they even tried treating you differently because of who you are, I’d hex every single one. You’re amazing, (Y/N), so few people are metamorphmagus, and even fewer can fully turn themselves into animals, there’s been debate about that being possible at all, and you’re living proof of it being true! I dont know if this is statistically accurate, but to me, you are one in a million, without a doubt, and your secret will always be safe with me.”

I blink, and feel (Y/N)’s small body crashing against my own, her arms wrapping around my middle and her face hidden against my abdomen.

“Thank you, for everything you just said, and for being so kind to me last night.” She has to turn her head to prevent her words from being muffled by my jumper, but as soon as she has finished speaking, she hides her blushing face again.

I chuckle, unable to comprehend how adorable she is, or how I never noticed before. “There’s no need to thank me. Next time though, dont go running off like that, you had me worried sick!”

(Y/N) laughs into my jumper and lifts her head to grin cheesily at me. “Next time, sleep with one eye open!“

I laugh with her, and then we break from our hug so that we can begin walking back towards Hogwarts, but my arm is still hanging loosely around her shoulders, and hers is still tucked around my back. Glancing down at her when she isnt looking, I smirk mischievously.

"I am so calling you Lady from now on.”

#draco malfoy #draco malfoy imagine #draco malfoy x reader #x reader #harry potter #imagine #imagines #fanfic #fanfiction

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justagalwhowrites · 10 months

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Beskar Doll - Ch. 19: Snake Pit

A high stakes job on Jakku puts you undercover and the Mandalorian out of reach. A continuation of Beskar Doll Ch. 1-18 found on Tumblr here.

Pairing: The Mandalorian/Din Djarin x Female Reader

Warnings: SMUT! Com link fuckery because ooo buddy. Canon typical violence. No use of Y/N. Minors DNI 18+ only.

Length: 6.8K

“Think Imps have changed much in five years?” You asked as you, the child and the Mandalorian made your way into town.

“No,” he said, a finality in his voice. “Ran into some not long before I found you again. Same as always.”

“Well that’ll make things easier,” you sighed. “I’ve acted like an Imp before, I can do it again.”

Your arm brushed his and you quickly crossed it over you, trying to ignore the spark that ran over you where you’d touched him.

It had been like this since you’d woken up, naked and alone, in the Mandalorian’s bed.

“Din?” You’d whispered into the darkness, wrapping yourself from the blankets you’d been tucked in as you got out of bed. There was no response. You said his name again, a bit louder. No luck. “I’m turning on a light,” you said, knowing there was no way he was in the room. It was small, you’d have bumped into him getting out of the bed if he were. You closed your eyes all the same, giving him a moment to protest. It was silent. You opened your eyes slowly anyway, squinting against the brightness and ready to snap them shut again just in case he was there, unmasked, and you somehow had missed him. But the room was empty.

His armor and flight suit were gone, as were the clothes he’d helped you remove. Sitting beside the bed was a pair of pants and a shirt, like the ones you’d woken up in before, folded and waiting for you. You put them on, cuffing the pants so you wouldn’t trip, and you put the blankets you’d used to cover yourself back where they belonged on the bed before you went in search of the Mandalorian.

You found him in the cockpit, the tell-tale sound of engines a hint for where to go. The kid was on his lap, happily eating some of the meat from the planet you’d just left.

“Hey,” you said, even though you knew he’d have heard you come in.

“Wanted to get an early start,” he said, not looking at you.

“Sure,” you nodded.

“I’ll fix the heaters in a bit,” he said.

“If you need help, let me know,” you leaned against the wall of the cockpit, arms crossed. That got him to turn around.

“You don’t know how to fix things,” you could almost hear him frowning. You shrugged.

“I learned.” His silence was skeptical. “I had farm equipment to maintain. I’ve never worked on a starship but I can’t imagine the principles are all that different. You don’t want me running the show but I can help.”

“Good to know.”

You stood there awkwardly for a moment, trying to not think about your naked body against his while wishing you’d been with it enough to properly appreciate how much of his skin you’d gotten to touch instead of being too freezing and exhausted to think straight.

“Are these clothes yours?” You asked after too much silence for you to really tolerate. He nodded once. “I’ve just never seen you wear them.”

“I don’t around other people,” he said.

“Right.”

You chewed the inside of your cheek. You wished you’d just kissed him. You doubted you’d ever have the chance again, so close without a helmet in the way, you should have just kissed him. At least asked to kiss him. You couldn’t let the silence hang there anymore and you just left, going back into the hold and putting some distance between you and the Mandalorian.

He did ask for help when working on the heaters. Your size came as a plus, his shoulders too broad to properly reach the wires he needed.

“Be careful,” he sounded stressed. “If you…”

“It’s fine, Mando,” you said, torso inside the ship as you tested the wires. You found the issue, unplugging it from the panel and carefully slipping back into the hold. “Here’s your problem, it’s fried.”

He took it from you, holding it up.

“I don’t have any more of this,” he sighed. “Have to look for some on Jakku. At least the junk trade there is solid, finding pre-Empire compatible parts is getting harder and harder.”

“There’s more like that in there,” you nodded to the wire, your arm propped up on your raised knee. “Anything going to be a fire hazard if it goes? I’ve made it this far in life, I’d rather not be taken out by equipment failure.”

He sighed.

“Can you reach it?”

“I’ll need to climb all the way into the panel,” you shrugged. “But I think so. I won’t really know what I’m looking for, though, I’ll need you to describe it.”

“It’s probably the whole heating system,” he said. “I’ve got auxiliary to keep us from freezing to death if we need to detach it all but it won’t be a fun trip.”

“Better than dying in a fireball,” you said, turning and crawling into the panel, carefully working your way past wires without knocking them loose.

“Don’t like you in there, Doll,” he said as you reached the part of the panel you needed. There was an access point here, so you were at least able to move a little easier. You rolled your eyes, moving along the heater panel, checking all the wires.

“There’s a lot of wear and tear in here, Mando,” you frowned. “These wires look awfully close to the one I pulled. I think we might need to shut it off…”

“That’s going to make for a cold flight,” he sighed. “Can you reroute power to the auxiliary while you’re in there? Hopefully boost it?”

“Sure,” you replied, puzzling out the panels for a minute. “As soon as I figure out which one that is.”

“Don’t like this…” he muttered again. You ignored him, finding what you thought was the power cable and pulling it. You heard something power down but weren’t quite sure what.

“Didn’t just lose anything crucial did we?” You called.

“No, that was the heat,” he sighed. You nodded.

“Well at least it wasn’t life support,” you muttered, tracing your fingers along the panel until you found what you were pretty sure was the auxiliary system and attached it. “I think I have it, give it a go.”

It was quiet for a moment and you shifted your weight from foot to foot, the crouch you were stuck in getting uncomfortable.

“That was it,” he said. “Now get out of there before you electrocute yourself.”

“Such little faith,” you muttered as you made your way back into the hold. He ignored your comment as you used him for balance to get out of the innards of his ship. You sighed, crossing your arms. Even though the heaters had only just switched over, you already felt colder. But you were pretty sure it was just your mind getting ahead of your body.

“We should… I don’t know, swaddle him or something,” you nodded to the baby who was flicking through artwork on your data pad. “We need to keep him warm.”

“We can hole up in the bunk,” Din sighed. “Keep the heat concentrated in the smallest space…”

So that’s what you did. It was the first time there’d been any kind of physical intimacy between the two of you that one of you couldn’t just run away from, though you supposed it was different. It wasn’t like he’d had his fingers inside you or guided your hips over his until both of you came. He’d just held you to warm you up. While naked. Without the helmet.

You bundled up the best you could, Din sitting on one end of the bunk and you on the other, the baby clambering over both of your legs as they sat beside each other, as though you were living obstacle courses there for his amusement.

“Do you remember ever being that care free?” You asked, watching as the kid slipped a little on the Mandalorian’s beskar.

“A bit,” he said, offering the child a steadying hand. “It feels very far away, though. Another lifetime. You?”

“Yes and no,” you shrugged eventually. “I remember running and playing with my friends but those memories are so closely tied to bigger things. Like going to Alderaan as a girl. I got to see my friend and run in the woods and climb and do what children do but on the way there or home, I almost always had to deliver a message or retrieve one. Sometimes both. The joy was never had for joy’s sake.”

The kid moved on to trying to climb up the Mandalorian’s chest plate, grunting at the effort. Din offered him a hand but he ignored it. So he put it below the child, where he couldn’t see it, giving him a foothold he didn’t know was help. You smiled.

“I’d like that,” he said, looking up to you. “Joy for joy’s sake.”

You smiled, leaning your head back against the wall of the bunk.

“Me too.”

You’d fallen asleep with the child snuggly between you, Din leaving his armor on the floor - though the flight suit and helmet and your clothes stayed on. But in your sleep, you could have sworn you felt his lips on your forehead.

When you made it to Jakku, you were so cold you damn near sank into the sand, just happy to feel something warm. But now that you were there, you had a job to do.

You’d made a list of things you’d need to get into where you thought you needed to be - a bar that was popular with the Imperial set. The General, according to Din’s friend, was shifty. If he was there, he would hardly show up nightly and would only go places he felt secure. That narrowed the hunting grounds a bit.

Din had come to the opposite side of the planet from the outpost the Imperials reportedly collected at to gather supplies - both for you and the ship. You found some clothes that would help you blend in, a few days worth, and cartridges that would fit your blaster.

“I’ll stick to outside the outpost, about 30 clicks or so,” the Mandalorian said as you walked down the dusty street. “Close enough to get you out fast, far enough that they shouldn’t know I’m there.”

“So how am I getting to the outpost,” you frowned. You felt the kid’s eyes on you so you looked down to him, in his bag on Mando’s hip. Longing. You held out a finger and he took it, the kid immediately feeling happier. The Mandalorian looked your way and you could almost sense his expression, suddenly realizing what he was expecting. “No.”

“It’s just you,” he replied. “I thought you said you were fine when it was just you.”

“Don’t expect me to be racing out of there on a speeder,” you replied. “I won’t be making any dramatic escapes with it.”

“You can sell it when you get to town if you really want,” he said soothingly. You sighed.

“I can’t tell if you’re doing this to torture me or if this really is the best plan.”

“It’s the best plan,” he replied. “The torture is a perk. Just need to find one for a decent price.”

You sighed, glaring up at him.

“I have a better idea.”

The three of you made your way to the bar in town. You sent the Mandalorian in a few minutes before you, trying to make it look like you didn’t know each other. You spotted him quickly, his armor glistening from the corner while the kid happily drank from a small cup as he stood on the table.

You sat at the bar, ordering a weak cocktail and sipping it slowly, biding your time. If this planet had a fair few Imps, one would wander in eventually. You were right, not needing to wait long.

A man came into the bar, not much older than you but he had the military look you’d come to know well. Short hair, utilitarian clothes, a chip on his shoulder that you could have seen from space. He took the bar stool a few seats down from you and tried to get the attention of the bar tender, who was busy with other things. You looked him over as he ground his teeth, getting frustrated.

“Remember when we used to be treated well in places like this?” You smiled, tilting your body toward him. He looked you up and down, his eyes lingering on your chest.

“Those were the days,” he said, not sounding as frustrated as he looked. “What happened?”

You shrugged.

“Little fear went a long way.”

“Did it ever,” he changed seats, moving closer to you, watching your fingers as they trailed up your drink glass.

“So I was right,” you tilted your head a little, smiling flirtatiously. “You served?”

“Four years,” he said. “Sounds like you did, too, but you don’t look it.”

“Officers never do, do we?” You smirked.

“Where were you stationed?” He asked. He was facing you fully now, his whole body aligned with yours. You took a sip of your drink.

“Naboo,” you smiled. “You?”

“I was Naval,” he replied. “On the Executor.”

“Lord Vader’s ship?” Your eyebrows raised. You were impressed, not even having to fake it.

“Were you on Naboo for Cinder?” He asked. “Heard that was a bloodbath.”

“It was rough,” you nodded. “Barely made it out… The Executor? I don’t think I’ve met anyone who served on that vessel. You seem awfully young…”

“Well,” he smirked. “When you’re good at what you do, you rise through the ranks fast.”

You leaned in closer to him.

“Prove it,” you smiled.

“Prove it?” He swallowed, hard. You nodded. “How?”

You sat back, arching your back just so, his eyes almost snapping to your breasts.

“I’ll show you mine if you show me yours,” you quirked a brow at him. His eyes went back to yours. “Never seen an Executor service token before.”

He all but dove his hand into his pocket, pulling out a large, silver coin and slapping it on the bar. You picked it up, turning it over in your fingers, the image of a Star Destroyer on one side and the seal of the Empire on the other. The name of the ship was stamped into the outside edge. You smiled. You couldn’t have asked for a better way to sell your story.

“Impressive,” you smiled, downing the rest of your cocktail before tucking the token in your pocket and standing up.

“Hey wait,” he said, standing up, too.

“Well, aren’t you coming?” You asked over your shoulder as you headed for the door. He trailed behind you, his hand going to your lower back and sliding lower as you made your way outside.

“Do you have a place near here?” He asked as you lead him down the nearest alley.

“No,” you stopped and faced him, smiling. He looked confused. “I just needed your service token.”

“Wait,” he sounded confused, too. “I didn’t give it to you, not like that…”

“That’s true,” you nodded. “But I’m taking it. You can let me or you can try to take it back, but I wouldn’t recommend it.”

He was slow enough that you could see him figuring it out, the anger slowly building in him before he lunged for you. You sidestepped him, grabbing his hand and folding it back, making him yelp in pain.

“I was so hoping you’d choose this option,” you smirked, hooking your leg around his ankle and ripping it out from below him, watching as he crumpled to the ground.

“You said you served on Naboo!” His eyes searched yours.

“Never said for which side, you Imperial piece of shit,” you twisted his wrist until it snapped and you let it go. He pulled it into himself, staring at it in disbelief. You crouched down to his level, grabbing him by the hair and making him look at you.

“Now did you really serve on the Executor?” You asked, searching his eyes. “Or did you steal or buy this off someone and you just wanted to talk a big game?”

He looked terrified, like he wasn’t sure what the right answer was.

“I served,” his voice shook. “But I was just an enlisted! I was on janitorial, I never even fired my weapon outside of training, I swear!”

You caught a glimpse of beskar coming down the alley.

“What do you think, Mando?” You said, not looking up at him and keeping your eyes on the man in front of you. “Says he never fired his weapon. Think that excuses him?”

“He’s seen your face,” the Mandalorian replied, voice deathly calm. “He touched you. Should kill him.”

“Please!” He cried, cradling his wrist to his chest. “I swear, I never hurt anyone, I promise!”

You looked up at the Mandalorian, his arms crossed over his metal covered chest. He met your gaze, you could feel the intensity of his eyes behind the helmet. You looked back to the man on his knees in front of you.

“You ever going to tell anyone you saw me?” You asked him.

“No, never, not a word!” He was almost sobbing.

“You ever going to brag about being an Imp again?”

“No!”

“And why not?” You asked, still holding his hair. “Is propping up a fascist dictatorship that murdered billions something to be proud of?”

“No, please!”

You released him and he slumped to the ground. You stuck your hands in his pockets, finding a speeder key.

“Breathe a word of this and I’ll bleed you dry,” you said, stepping over him. “I’m keeping the coin and I’m taking the bike. Consider it reparations.”

It didn’t take long to find his speeder bike in front of the bar and you handed the keys to the Mandalorian.

“Now we don’t need to buy one,” you said. He climbed on the bike, setting the kid in front of him and leaning far enough forward for you to climb on the back. You wrapped your arms around his waist and put your head in the middle of his back.

“Should have killed him,” he said.

“He’s young,” you sighed. “Got sucked up in it. Who knows, maybe now he’ll do something good.”

Mando moved the ship to outside the outpost that night, setting it down near some rocks that made for decent enough cover. You climbed to the top of them, using binocs to scout a bit. There wasn’t much to see, Jakku as barren as Tatooine, the grit of sand slipping between your fingers. You hauled blankets outside and set them on the rock, Mando watching you like you were crazy the whole time.

“What?” You asked eventually, stretching out on one.

“It’s rock,” he said. “The ship is more comfortable.”

You shrugged.

“I like being outside,” you jerked your chink up toward the stars. “I can take some uncomfortable sleep.”

He sighed before stretching out beside you, the kid already asleep in his pod. You hesitated before rolling onto your side and wrapping around him, your head on his chest, arm draped over his stomach. He hesitated for a second before putting his arm around you, his fingers curling around your ribs, lightly brushing the bottom of your breast. You smiled, looking at the stars reflected on his beskar.

“I’m…” he paused, like he was rethinking what he was going to say. “It’s going to be weird, you being gone again.”

“Just for a few days,” you shrugged. “Maybe less, if our Imp shows his face sooner rather that later.”

You were both silent. He pulled you a little snugger against him.

“I’m going to miss you, too,” you said.

***

You may have been a natural at a number of things but flying a speeder was not one of them. Din did his best to not laugh as you took the controls to travel to the outpost, the kid watching with a concerned expression from his pod.

“I can’t believe you’re this worried about driving a speeder,” he shook his head, arms crossed in front of him.

“Some of us aren’t good at everything,” you muttered, your arms looking oddly stiff.

“Doll,” he said, fighting to keep the amusement from his voice. You looked at him, glaring a little. “It’s just 30 clicks and there’s nothing between here and there but sand. It’s going to be OK. Do you think I’d try to talk you into something that wasn’t going to be OK.”

“No,” you replied. “But I hate speeder bikes.”

“You’re fine when you’re on them with me,” he shrugged.

“Yeah, I trust you to drive them,” you snapped. “I’m another story.”

“You jumped us away from Coruscant once,” he replied. “That’s a busy system, you didn’t crash us into anything. You can fly a speeder bike through the desert.”

“Yeah yeah,” you muttered. You were wearing the clothes they’d gotten you the day before, you looking every inch like an Imp officer who’d been stuck on a backwater planet. The service token was in your pocket - your key into the Imperial gathering place - as was a com link and your knife. Your blaster was at your thigh and your bag was strapped to the back of the bike with enough to get you through at least a week of observing and feeding Din information.

“If anything happens…” he started but you cut him off.

“I’ll call.”

“I’m serious,” he said, regretting this plan more and more the closer you got to leaving. “If you get into a bad spot, hide and tell me. I’ll get you out.”

“Din,” you sat up straight, hands on your thighs. “It’s going to be fine. Just a bar full of old Imps, not a snake pit.”

“Don’t try to take him in,” he ignored you. “Just locate him.”

“I know what I’m doing.”

He looked at you for a moment. You were watching him, patiently waiting for him to adjust to the lack of control he knew he was about to have. You hadn’t been this far away from him since he’d found you again. He knew it would have to happen eventually. That, before too long, you’d be much further for much longer. It didn’t make him feel any better.

“Let me know when you get there,” he said. “And give me location information for wherever you find a room. I want to be able to get to you quickly.”

“OK,” you smiled, almost condescendingly.

“Be safe, Doll.”

You just gave him a nod before leaning over the bike, starting it and taking a deep breath before shooting off. Din watched you go, eyes still on the horizon long after he couldn’t see you anymore.

“C’mon kid,” he sighed, patting his little head. “We’ve got repairs to make.”

***

You made it to the outpost without incident and you tried your damndest to not look shaky getting off the stupid bike.

It wasn’t a huge place and it didn’t take you long to get the lay of the land. You parked your bike down the street from a bar that you suspected was the right one, watching people come and go for a bit. It looked like there was an inn on the upper floors, a stroke of luck you weren’t anticipating. You took a moment to center yourself, reminding yourself why you were there.

It had been a while since you’d done something of this magnitude. You’d been surrounded by Imps before, sometimes for days, but you’d had more reliable cover. You didn’t have a fake chain code, no believable ID. If anyone questioned your story, the only thing you had to back yourself up - give you any clout - was the service token you’d stolen the night before. Blasting your way out of here would be hard. You just had to lie low enough that you didn’t draw unwanted attention but be noticeable enough that you could confirm the General’s identity. A delicate balance.

You slung your bag over your arm and stalked into the bar, carrying yourself with the confidence of someone who belonged. Everyone in the bar had the feel you’d come to associate with Imperials. Entitled, uniform, the idea that no cost was too high for what they wanted. If they couldn’t buy it, they would take it.

“Can I help you?” The bar tender met you at the end of the bar, looking you over. You tried to place her allegiance as quickly as you could. She seemed a bit different, probably just working here for a job and not because she supported the cause. You’d have to make sure that - if you did have to shoot your way out of here - that she wasn’t collateral damage.

“New in town,” you said gruffly. “Heard this was a good place to find jobs from… like minded folk.”

A few people in the bar looked your way and you squared your jaw, almost daring them to come challenge you. None did.

“Do you have a room?” You asked, turning back to the young woman behind the bar.

She took your credits and gave you a key and you made your way upstairs. You’d gotten lucky, she’d given you a corner room on the top floor, giving you more ways out and fewer ways for people on the inside to eavesdrop or break through. Plus, getting to the roof for a quick escape would be easy, just out the window and up.

You set your bag down and did a quick search of the room, checking for potential recording devices or traps. Not that anyone knew you were coming but you wouldn’t put it past Imperials to tap every room in the place. They’d have no qualms about spying on their fellow Imps. Hell, that just might be a perk.

But there was no sign of anything nefarious. You peeked out the window, high enough off the ground that you doubted anyone on the street below could see you. In another stroke of luck, the windows of the inn weren’t just open holes in the wall but had actual panes of glass, offering some quiet and privacy. Probably why Imps were so drawn to this place, you realized. Hard to do illegal business under the nose of the New Republic when someone could just stand under your window and hear everything you had to say.

You fished out your com link.

“Mando?” You said, keeping your voice low. He responded almost immediately.

“Doll,” he replied. “You make it?”

“No, I’m dead in the desert.”

“That’s not funny.”

“I disagree,” you smiled to yourself before getting down to business. “I’m at the inn, it’s over the bar. Pretty easy to find.”

“Which room?”

“Northeast corner, top floor,” you replied. “Swept it for bugs already. We got lucky, there are real windows here, seems built for privacy.”

“That is lucky,” he said. “What’s the place like?”

“About what you’d expect,” you shrugged, even knowing he couldn’t see you. “Full of them, same as ever.”

He was silent for a moment.

“How’s the kid?”

He didn’t answer for a moment. You were about to check the com when he spoke.

“He misses you.”

You smiled for a second, hoping that maybe he wasn’t just talking about the kid.

“I miss him, too.”

You were silent again, sitting on the bed in your room, feeling oddly alone.

“I’m going to go see what I can learn,” you said eventually.

“Check in when you get back to your room,” Mando said. “If you don’t check in for longer than 12 hours, I’m coming to get you.”

“You’re overbearing, you realize that?”

“Don’t get yourself killed,” he said. “Talk to you soon.”

You switched the com off and headed downstairs. You picked a corner table, small enough that you wouldn’t be a problem but large enough that someone wouldn’t mind joining you if they wanted to talk.

You sat like an Imp, taking up as much space as you could, one leg stretched into the aisle alongside the table, the opposite arm laying across the back of the booth. You ordered a beer and sipped it slowly, watching as people came and went. One man came in who was in the age bracket of Shadrin but he sat close enough to you that you could eavesdrop with ease. No luck.

The lack of puck made this difficult. You had no idea what the guy looked like, just that he was a human man in his 60s.

“Heard you were looking for work,” a younger man from the bar came and stood next to you, beer bottle dangling from his hand.

“What’s it to you?” You asked, keenly aware of the longer reach for your blaster. You watched him carefully, like a predator.

“Haven’t seen you before,” he shrugged, taking the seat in the booth across from you.

“New to the area,” you said, looking out to the bar.

“You serve?” He asked. You looked at him, brows raised. He put his hands up in surrender. “It’s a valid question, we can’t just trust anybody who walks in here.”

You glared at him for a second before reaching into your pocket and pulling out the service token, slapping it on the table. He picked it up, looking it over.

“Executor?” He nodded, looking impressed before setting it back down. “Not many enlisted got that gig.”

“The hell makes you think I was enlisted,” you snapped.

“Seem a bit young to be an officer,” he replied.

“Not when you can do what I can do,” you grabbed the token off the table and stuck it back in your pocket. “If you’re not hiring, move along and stop wasting my time.”

“What kind of work you after?” He asked, looking you up and down.

“The kind that’ll make a difference,” you said.

“What skills do you have?”

“Keep asking me stupid questions and you’ll find out,” you snapped. He smirked.

“Might know someone who’s looking for help,” he replied. “How long are you here for?”

“Until I find the right job,” you replied. “What’s the job?”

“I’ll let him tell you that,” he said. “Assuming you’re still here next time he comes in.”

He took his beer and left your table.

The first man was the closest thing you had to a lead that night. You stayed in your corner, drinking your way through 3 beers over the course of 8 hours - enough to not be suspicious but little enough that you stayed sober. A few others approached you, offering small work that you pretended was below you. One tried to pick you up and you pulled your knife on him, threatening to cut his balls off when he wouldn’t take a no and just kept talking.

You were cautious as you made your way up to your room. You put your bag just on the other side of the door when you got in - not against it, where it wasn’t heavy enough to make a difference anyway but far enough in that it’d trip someone in the dark if they weren’t looking - and called Din.

“Hey,” you said, waiting for a second. He answered quickly.

“Still alive, I hear.”

You laughed a little.

“Nah,” you said. “Just haunting you.”

“You would.”

You rolled your eyes, falling back on your bed.

“Any luck?” He asked.

“Possible lead,” you replied. “Talked to a guy who sounded like he did advance work for someone higher up. Didn’t get a name or a schedule, he sounds cagey which is a good thing for us.”

“Could be our guy,” Din agreed.

You were quiet for a moment.

“Your contact say why they’re so interested in him?” You asked.

“Not in detail,” he replied. “She’s New Republic Special Forces, not sure she could say. Don’t think she was supposed to be asking me for help but…”

“You’re good at what you do,” you said when he was quiet for a moment.

“Sounds like he’s working on something,” he replied. “Otherwise I doubt she’d have called.”

“Got the impression the guy here is looking for talent outside the norm,” you said. “So I tried to fit the bill.”

“You’re good at what you do,” he said. You smiled a bit. “I’m sure you’ve got his attention.”

You were quiet for a moment, looking around your stark room. You’d spent the last few nights beside Din and the last few weeks with him never that far away. You thought you were used to being alone but this felt lonely.

“Get the ship fixed?” You asked, mostly for something to say.

“Close,” he replied. “I can’t fit where you can, I’ve had to take some things apart. She’ll still fly fine, but there are more pieces in my hold than I really like.”

“So particular.”

“Yeah,” he laughed. “I like my ships in one piece, I’m picky that way.”

You sighed after a moment.

“I’m not sure I can blast my way out of here if I need to,” you said, biting your lip.

“Are you OK?” He asked quickly.

“I’m fine,” you said, stretching your legs a bit, adjusting on the bed. “But I just thought you should know. There’s a fair bit of firepower here. They’ve got men and they’ve got blasters. I don’t think I’m in danger but if it comes down to it, you might just need to take the kid and go.”

“No.”

“Din…” you sighed.

“No. That’s the end of it.”

“If it’s me or the kid, you choose the kid,” you said. “And I don’t mean in a sure thing, either, because I know what you’d do then. I mean if it looks at all dicey, do not risk that boy. Understand?”

He was silent.

“I mean it, Din,” you said. “Do not risk it.”

“I promise I won’t take any undue risks with the kid’s life,” he said after a moment.

“That was oddly specific,” you replied.

“It’s the answer you’re getting.”

“You’re infuriating.”

“And you’re frustrating,” he replied. “Same as always.”

You rolled your eyes but found yourself wishing you could turn and look at him, touch him. When you slept beside each other, even if you started out feet apart you always ended up close, naturally gravitating toward each other, even when you weren’t conscious.

Neither of you had said goodnight but it had been a few minutes since you’d said anything and you let your mind drift, staring at the ceiling. Without meaning to, you found yourself remembering the night by the fire, the night that he’d touched you. The way his hands - his bare, ungloved hands - had roamed over your skin, leaving trails of heat over your flesh. You’d felt the desire there, the need and the want that mirrored your own, you were sure it was there when he sank his fingers into you, his thumb working your clit, his other hand against your breast and then your mouth and then your hair…

You slipped one hand below your shirt, cupping your breast, the other drifting into your pants, slipping over your lower lips, brushing your clit, finding the slick heat at your core.

“Doll?” His voice on the com made you jump and you scrambled for it, answering it as quickly as you could.

“Yeah?” You said, wincing at the sound of your voice. He paused.

“What were you just doing?”

“Nothing.”

“Doesn’t sound like nothing.”

You were quiet, breathing heavy, cheeks hot.

“Keep doing it,” he said, his voice dark. You swallowed, hard.

“Doing what?” You asked.

“You know what.”

You were silent.

“Where’s your hand, Doll.” He asked while not asking - he never could just ask.

“None of your business,” you said, still a little breathless.

“It’s my business,” he replied. “I want you to put your hand between your legs.”

“You think I’m going to just do what you tell me?” You demanded even though you knew you were going to listen to him, you were already desperate.

“Yes,” he said. “Put your hand between your legs. Tell me when you have.”

“Only if you do it, too,” you said quickly.

“Deal,” he said. “Put your hand between your legs, Doll.”

You took a shaky breath and obeyed, putting your fingers back against yourself.

“OK,” you said, trying to keep your voice from trembling.

“Touch your clit,” he ordered. “Lightly, one finger, moving in a circle.”

You closed your eyes and obeyed, the sound of his voice settling warm in your stomach, like the best liquor, getting you drunk on desire. A light moan slipped from your lips.

“Good,” he said, his voice heavier. “Keep going, a little harder now, up and down.”

“Are you…” you managed, but he cut you off.

“Don’t worry about me,” he said. “Add another finger, a little harder, faster.”

You obeyed. It was easy, pretending it was his hand touching you when his voice was so close, telling you what to do, making it so you didn’t need to think or worry.

“Slide your fingers down,” he ordered. “Use your palm on your clit, get your fingers nice and wet for me, Doll.”

“Din,” you whimpered as you obeyed.

“I want you to push into yourself,” he almost moaned it, sounding almost as desperate as you felt. “Slowly. You’re tight, don’t go too hard…”

“Fuck,” you moaned, opening yourself with your two fingers, slowly sinking into your sex.

“Tell me when you’re all the way inside, Doll,” he was panting now. “I want to hear you.”

Your walls clenched tight around your fingers, wetness seeping out onto your hand, until you were buried deep inside yourself.

“I am,” you managed.

“Good,” he said. “Curve your fingers up into yourself, you know where I mean.”

You obeyed with a choked moan, pressing into the spot he’d found with his fingers.

“Keep your fingers curved,” he said. “And slowly slide them down, almost out of you, keep your palm on your clit.”

You did as you were told, moving excruciatingly slowly inside yourself, your body starting to tighten around you.

“Doll?” He asked. His voice was needy. “Tell me what you need.”

“You,” you whimpered.

“Me what.”

“You to make me cum,” you were ready to beg if he needed. “You to cum. You in me. Please…”

“Push your fingers inside yourself again,” he said. “Harder, faster. Then pull them back. Do it again and again for me, harder and faster each time.”

“Fuck,” you gasped it as you worked your hand against yourself, your body getting tighter and tighter. “Are you close?”

“I’m not cumming until you’re at least on number two, Doll,” he said. “Let me hear you.”

You moaned, pressing harder and faster into yourself, your fingers stretching your wet heat to the point of soreness but you didn’t care, breaths coming in keening pants.

“Fuck, I’m about to cum,” you moaned.

“Do it,” he commanded. “Cum for me.”

You went over the edge at his words, your whole body throbbing with it, not able to see straight from it.

“Din,” you moaned, breathless, your fingers stilled inside you. “Fuck…”

“Did I tell you to stop?” He asked.

“No.”

“Then don’t stop,” he said. “I need you to cum one more time for me, I need to finish with you. Keep fucking yourself, hard, deep.”

Your body was like a raw nerve, everything heightened, but you listened, thrusting your fingers in and out of yourself, letting yourself moan and pant so that he could hear you. He did the same, the sound of his pleasure rough and demanding. You couldn’t help but imagine what it would feel like if it was you he was slamming into instead of his hand, how he’d stretch you, fill you.

“Din,” it was like you were having an out of body experience, there was too much pleasure in you for your mind to process as your second orgasm built. You were watching yourself standing at the edge of a cliff, desperately wanting to shove yourself over the side. “I’m about to… Fuck, Din, please…”

“Please what,” he swallowed, panting.

“Please cum,” you begged. “I can’t hold back, please…”

“Fuck, Cyare,” he moaned, his voice filling you as you came, hard, your body surrendering totally to it. He was breathless, gasping but satisfied. You went limp on the bed, your fingers still inside yourself, you didn’t have the energy to move them.

You both lay there, coming back down from your shared high while miles apart. You caught your breath, happy to just listen to him exist on the other end of the comm.

“Doll?” He said softly.

You paused. What did you even say now?

“Yes?”

“Be safe.”

A/N: I'm SUPER excited about this chunk of story, I hope you all enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it!

Thanks for reading and enjoying Din and Doll! Love you all <3

#fanfic #smut fic #mandalorian fanfic #enemies to friends to lovers #din djarin #the mandalorian #slow burn #the mandalorian x reader #the mandalorian x f!reader #the mandalorian x female reader

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dundermisfits · 9 months

Text

Erin

Pairing: Erin x female!reader

Requested by: @littlecoffie

Request:

Omg, this is my first question in all my time on Tumblr, I even had to verify my password and my email LOL. I don't even know if the "suggestions for writing" are made here, but if you can... Can you make some HCs of Erin? (Sorry, English is not my first language)

***

• In the beginning, it’s pretty obvious that you both like each other, she’s more of the one to flirt while you’re more of the shy one. She thinks it’s adorable to see you’re blushing at her compliments and never fails to do it every day just to see you blush and slightly hide your face away from her

• It’s a little awkward at first, but you got more comfortable when you started visiting the reception desk more often, nearly just as much as Jim did when Pam was there

• Erin wants to keep you safe from anything that can hurt your relationship, she does her very very best to keep you away from Andy followed soon by Gabe

• She broke up with Gabe at the Dundies to be with you and everyone but Gabe is supportive and cheers for you both

• Eventually, you have reached that point in the relationship where you both move in together and it comes across to you that something was going to happen or was about to happen, but you don’t bring this up to Erin

• However, it turns out you were right to feel that way, Gabe showed up a couple of times at the doorstep asking for Erin to give him a second chance and both times she slams the door in his face before telling him to go or away or there will be problems

• She would never go back to him and she needs you to know that

• Of course you both don’t always agree on everything just like every couple, but you’re both good at resolving the issue and make things workout, you’re both so good at it that you make it look easy

• At night in bed, Erin works late nights so she would come home to you face down in the people half asleep, the sound of her walking through the heavy front door wakes you up as you wait for Erin to take the spot beside you in your shared bed

• She always wants to make sure you’re alright and in good condition, that you’re still comfortable with her there

• It’s no surprise you fear thunderstorms as it is a common fear, it’s something that stuck with you since you were little and Erin could tell it made you nervous as if she had a sixth sense and pulled you closer to her until it the storm passed over

• Of course being the big flirt she is, Erin takes this opportunity to flirt with you, to try and take your mind off the storm and as nervous as you were, it still made you blush

• “Your lips look lonely, would they like to meet mine?”

• That caught you off guard, looking up at her with that look she hoped to see

• “Are you trying to flirt with me?”

• “Maybe.”

• “You don’t have to, you know.”

• “I know.”

• You laid there as you pretend to run it through your mind before playfully agreeing and allowed your lips to meet

• Despite the thunderstorm, you don’t want this moment to end

• The final thing is… Angela and Kelly can’t help but feel jealous of your relationship because they want what you

• Which is something they think they won’t get, but little do they know….

• They quietly team against you and turn you in anonymously. One time, you were both in the break room together sharing your meal and after Angela walks in and sees Erin giving you a quick kiss before going back to work, she took it to Toby

• Kelly walked in on the same scene a couple days later and turned it into a complaint before taking it to Michael

• Nothing was made of it, as Toby and Michael thought it was a childish act from both women while demanding to leave you both alone

• Which they do after losing this battle of having it their way

***

@dundermisfits

A/N: I’m so sorry this took so long! I hope you like it, I’ve been in the process of moving back to my home state and finally have myself a break!

Happy reading!

❤️❤️❤️❤️

Characters:

• Michael Scott

• Dwight Schrute

• David Wallace

• Jim Helpart

• Oscar

• Pam

• Karen

• Angela

• Kelly

• Erin

• Gabe

#the office imagines #the office imagine #the office x reader #the offspring #michael scott #dwight schrute #david wallace #the office #erin #pam #Jim #angela martin #Andy #Gabe #request #requested #requests

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ihatetmblrclassifyingthings · 2 months

Text

Guess I’ll make my midlife (while not in my midlife, I hope) crisis my first post to observe how tumblr works.

Do you ever just feel your heart drop while also managing to beat so hard that it gives you a nausea headache? I literally just survived one horribly beautiful aspect of my life, and now it feels like that again right now, but without training wheels— and an additional volcano— and several loved friends ready to laugh and mock me— And be disappointed in me…

I’m both new and used to university. I’ve never had to withdraw from a class before though— until what feels like now. I wouldn’t care about my grades as much, but I’m completely reliant on scholarships, AND I WILL BE COMPLETELY RELIANT ON THEM FOR GRADUATE STUDIES.

So without money, I rely on essentially perfect grades for money. I don’t have a job, because I pour all my effort into school; if I didn’t I’d be in a crazy (and unfortunately common) amount of debt. I’ll need scholarships once I hit graduate school too.

But right now I’m taking a class I need. We had a BIG test, and I did poorly, even with studying (mainly +5 straight hours before the exam, which is x5 more than I’ve ever done). And with that grade, unless I did absolutely perfect (which is impossible), I wouldn’t finish with a A. Maybe a B, at most. I’ve had worrisome classes before, but this one I genuinely think is a lost cause.

I have to figure out if having a W that I hope to replace with a future A would impact my GPA. Would I still have the chance for a 4.0? A chance at my graduate merit scholarships?

I’d ask for extra credit, but it’s explicitly forbidden for the type of course it is… There’s free tutoring, but I just don’t learn well with tutors, and there would be no guarantee the tutor would focus on the right things…

I know Tumblr won’t have any quick answers for me, this is a school specific matter, but… I guess I wanted to vent, because I feel like sobbing and hyperventilating because school is the only thing I’m good at that matters to survival, and the people around me will be so disappointed….and it may be my life, but it f*cking sends me into such a bad spiral when they’re disappointed…. And it hurts…

My antisocial, anxious self actually made friends in this class too, so that sucks even more to consider withdrawing. Cause I will drift apart and never see them again thanks to things both outside and inside my control.

It helped a bit to write this, but not a lot. But I see why you guys write on Tumblr now somewhat. I still feel like I’m going to cry and throw up and spiral. This all feels like my fault because I obsessed over some new fandoms lately when I should’ve worked more, even if I think that it wouldn’t have made a difference…I still feel guilty.. Please excuse any grammar/spelling/etc mistakes.

Does or has anyone felt like this before? It may get better, but the unknown is really pushing me towards an anxiety attack right now.

#first post #university #college #finance #i feel guilty #and mad #at myself #advice #i hate college #i'm sad

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stavromulabetaaa · 1 year

Text

I posted 5,689 times in 2022

209 posts created (4%)

5,480 posts reblogged (96%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@morgendaemmerung89

@stargazing-enby

@sitp-recs

@seafrost-fangirl

@crazybutgood

I tagged 3,378 of my posts in 2022

Only 41% of my posts had no tags

#drarry - 814 posts

#ofmd - 223 posts

#draco malfoy - 165 posts

#johnlock - 143 posts

#stranger things - 107 posts

#sherlock - 101 posts

#yoi - 91 posts

#always reblog - 77 posts

#hjp - 69 posts

#wolfstar - 66 posts

Longest Tag: 120 characters

#i spent all day woodworking and then i painted my bathroom mirror frame and then i installed a floor to ceiling cat tree

My Top Posts in 2022:

back on my picrew bullshit ✨

link

@softlystarstruck @drarrymybeloved @lou-isfake @m0srael @drarry-picrew

69 notes - Posted April 10, 2022

guess who finally read the captive prince trilogy after purchasing the books almost 3 years ago and is experiencing all the lamen feelings for the first time. y’all got to me and i get okay, i get it

83 notes - Posted August 24, 2022

Licurici by @lou-isfake [133k, E]

Summary: Charlie wanted Harry, but he’d never planned on having him. He’d never planned on Draco Malfoy, either. He hadn’t planned on anything but living out his days in Romania, with his friends and his dragons and his safe, peaceful distance.

Apparently, it wasn’t a very popular plan.

This is a story about crumbs and flickers and roots, running away and coming home; about falling in love without meaning to (twice), and having truly good friends, and the mutually revealing recognition between two people in love with the same man.

This is my first attempt at a single rec because it doesn’t feel quite adequate to just include Licurici in one of my usual rec lists. I don’t think a fic has occupied my mind so much since I read Grounds for Divorce by tepre, which is saying something. From the moment Lou first mentioned this fic was in the works I was already it’s #1 fan and was so greedy for any snippet that was posted on tumblr. And then when we started getting full chapters ohhh boy did Lou deliver! This incredibly heartwarming story will take you on a roller coaster of glorious pining and angst and tenderness and will leave you feeling like a puddle of goo on the floor. It left me completely unhinged and Lou probably thinks I am positively deranged after all my incoherent comments, tags, and tumblr posts. But it really is a perfectly paced journey full of carefully constructed character development with such a unique perspective that is so refreshing and creative. Not to mention the delicious smut, intriguing plot, and the OCs you will completely fall in love with! This story to me means warmth and comfort and home. Lou has a way of creating a dynamic between characters that is just unbelievably endearing. I am in awe of Lou’s genius and will continue to shout it from the rooftops any chance I get!

Some of my favorite quotes:

“Charlie Weasley could look at Draco, just once, and instantly know the depth of his greatest weakness, the earth-shattering strength of Draco’s devotion.”

“I am neither selfless, nor honourable.”

“Charlie loved too hard, too big, it was completely overwhelming. It was raw and vulnerable, dangerous, selfish, magnificent agony.”

“…a hunger for a feast laid before him, not the hunger for crumbs left behind.”

I’ve also listened to the Licurici playlist an embarrassing amount of times. It’s brilliantly curated to give you the same feeling of yearning and warm fuzzies you get from this fic and I highly recommend checking that out too.

Read Licurici on AO3

93 notes - Posted January 27, 2022

grumpy

picrew link

@softlystarstruck @drarrymybeloved @drarry-picrew @m0srael

94 notes - Posted January 22, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

the joy surrounding ofmd is how the sherlock fandom should have been celebrating in 2017 and it will never not break my heart knowing we could have had that. i’ll never forget seeing my dash full of devastated people feeling like they were lied to and baited and made to feel like “who they really are doesn’t matter”. i saw people leave fandom or take long mental health breaks because of s4. yeah we like to poke fun at mofftiss but what they did affected people in a very real way. ofmd is affecting people in a very real way. idk it’s just so nice to see people rejoicing rather than feeling like they were slapped in the face. also mofftiss can suck it because just look at how many articles are talking about the numbers this new show is bringing in. i hope it stings.

163 notes - Posted April 2, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

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breesays · 2 years

Text

When everyone believes you - what’s that like?

Hello, and happy Pride! I'm asexual. Hetero romantic asexual I think, but without alcohol maybe aromantic. It remains to be seen. I hadn't even heard the term aromantic before this year. But this is my first official Pride - and although I'm not exactly parading around waving my purple/black/white/grey flag (as my pride is still another's pain point), I DO want to knock out some FAQs.

The first one I see a lot, and have a very personal investment in: Why would an asexual need to come out? I see this from allos (GOOGLE IT) and aces alike. Some aces say "it's my business, it's private" and I respect that. Some allos consider it a non-event - annoying, even, that we feel the need for a label. But I do. I want to make it perfectly clear that my experiences - from just before puberty and beyond - have been very different from the NORM.

If you don't know what asexuality is, I will direct you to the following: AVEN, Ace Dad, TAAAP. I don't want to give that TED talk today. In fact, here is that TED talk.

So, why be loud about it? First of all, I actually don't feel great talking or writing about it. I'm a sex-averse ace, and will go to great lengths to avoid it in conversation, TV, movies, music, etc. I don't even like SAYING the WORD asexual (ace is great) But LISTEN - there are people who don't know asexuality EXISTS. As an orientation, it needs visibility. People - kids - teens - couples who've been married for decades - need to know of it as part of a wide spectrum. It's like someone found the uncropped, full size photo and it is incredible.

From a very young age, we're taught that sexuality is compulsory. An inevitability. Not now, but always "someday." Late bloomers. Innocents. Prudes. "Nothing serious." We're taught about consent, and boundaries (now) but at no point did anyone say - "and you may choose to never consent." Just... never presented as an option. And that sort of narrative needs a forking fork in it.

It's so great to see Gen Z coming out at 13, 14,15 - and yes, sexuality is fluid so maybe they change their mind - but God it must feel amazing to KNOW. To have had that a-ha moment. To be able to wave that little flag and just... Opt out. Say no thank you, and be believed.

We learned how painfully white-centric spaces and media were (are) and underrepresented Black people felt during the Black Lives Matter movement because we finally shut up and listened to their stories and perspectives. I'm not suggesting it's the same level of oppression, but I'm saying it was a great chance for us all to stop centering ourselves and our experiences. And to consider the value in representation. And I’m asking you to do that again.

I basically tried to drink myself into being allo for 15+ years. So what I'm trying to do is put my story out there in case some other questioning ace need to see it. I'm trying to save your liver, your dignity, your mornings. I want to tell you that I believe you and you have nothing to prove. YOU DON'T HAVE TO TRY IT. You CAN JUST KNOW. Trust yourself. Are you looking for permission? Then I grant you it.

I am not completely at peace with this identity. I'm angry. I'm sad. I re-evaluating a huge portion of my life - what things did I want and what things did I just think I should want? Which parts of me are damaged because I've spent so long trying to cram myself into a mold that wasn't made for me? I don't think it could've happened any other way. When I tried to come out in 2005 it was pre-Twitter, pre-Tumblr, pre-podcasts There was no flag, and there was only ONE activist (David Jay). AVEN was there, but it didn't feel like a community. I couldn't get anyone to take it seriously. Now we have like 3 books, two podcasts and Yasmin Benoit! Hey, it's something.

I guess that wasn’t really an FAQ. It was one why, my why.

#pride #aspec #asexual #breesays

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jjungkookislife · 2 years

Note

I have notifications on for you . I don’t always get to see them (I’m a nurse and work 12 hour shifts several days a week and I have notifs on for quite a few blogs so sometimes they tend to disappear). But I do usually scroll down your blog a couple times a week to catch up. I reblog gifs and pics and I’ll like some of the fics that you reblog to have them saved to read them later. I often find your anecdotes about work or your husband entertaining. I rarely comment on your personal posts but I do read them.

Stories I’ve liked include the Nanny series for Jin. The roommate series for the maknae line. And for Jungkook I liked fetish for blood, tidal wave, little mouse series, come series, love shop, and you up series. Idk of any of these have a common theme, maybe I just like the way you portray the relationships. I know I like to read mainly Jungkook and Seokjin fics but I read any of the members if the plot sounds interesting.

Some of the stories you post don’t interest me so I don’t interact with them (not that they’re not interesting in general but just not for my specific taste). But when I do like, I try to reblog and then leave a comment on it and each chapter or follow up Drabble.

Anyways, I hope you don’t stress out too much. This blog is supposed to be fun for you. There are a lot of factors that influence notes and reblogs so I hope you know the number of notes does not equate quality. 💜 (sorry for typos , I’m catching up on tumblr before going to bed lol)

Hello! Oh, wow I didn't know people turned notifications on for me 👀 what kind of notifications do y'all get?

Yes, I see you in my notifications, I recognize people I see often <3 hmm I've never thought if they had a common theme other than strangers to lovers, which is hard for me to write tbh lol thank you for giving my other fics a chance as well, it means a lot to me <3

Thank you so much. This made me extremely happy! Thank you! Yes, I'm trying not to get the numbers get to me, I'd rather have a higher interaction than more notes on my fics. I've never been one to care about the numbers until recently when the follower count is high but the interaction is low but everyone has been so lovely the past few days and thank you for stopping by! <3 I hope you have a good day/night <3

#b mail 💌

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that70sgirl · 3 years

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#I’ve never made a gif on tumblr before so give me a chance #that 70s show #jackie burkhart #steven hyde #t70s #sitcom #2000s tv #90s tv #hyde and jackie #jackie and hyde #hyde x jackie

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blahberry-pancake · 3 years

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So, I guess this is goodbye.

I've decided that the best thing for me to do right now will be to quit cc making. And before you all freak out, no I will not be deleting any of my cc. It's all gonna be available for you on Simsdom and my Tumblr page with everything on it.

My Patreon page will be hidden though and all exclusive content from there will be made public like right before this post so look below. There wasn't much exclusives there anyway.

First off, I really want to thank all of you for all the love and support you've given me throughout these... almost 5 years? Wow it's been that long? Anyway, thank you. If not for you, I'd probably never get to start my journey with 3D design and discover a passion for it.

And this is where I'll explain why I'm leaving for the curious ones.

So, I'm not gonna lie and sugarcoat anything. One part of cc making for me was the money, the other part was of course my passion for creating and seeing people enjoy what I make.

I had hoped I could make it my job and be able to support myself. Like I mentioned in a few posts before, I suffer with a lot of mental illnesses that prevent me from normal work and as you know, other people in the community have been able to make cc their jobs. So this is why I opened my Patreon. But it's been over a year and it didn't really kick off and things started falling apart. I stopped posting as much as I used to due to health and family issues. So not providing enough and not being good enough for people to support me on there was constantly on my mind, ironically preventing me even more from being creative. Plus disappointing the rest of you guys on here too.

But enough of that. Thanks to the support of my family through my recent mental breakdowns and everything, I've decided it's time to look for a job that could give me what I need. Money to support myself, medical insurance and finally, stability and routine. I'm a person who really needs routine in my life. And I'm getting way too old not to have stability either.

I want a job with a set amount of hours a day to work and then when that's done, I can do what I want. CC making couldn't give me that. I was constantly working. I never really had actual free time. When I did try to have a break, I'd feel bad for "procrastinating". I need time for my brain to unwind. To have that set time for relaxation and for work-time clearly divided.

So the only jobs I could do and qualify for are remote jobs. I found a whole lot of job offers for people with my skills to work for actual game studios! Mobile games, PC, whatever. What counts is that I might have a chance to actually do this and work in the gaming industry.

And even if that doesn't work out, there are other remote jobs I could try. Before shit hit the fan in the world, almost nobody offered remote work. And now it's almost in every offer so people like me can finally work too. I really need to try my luck with this. I'm sick of surviving instead of living. I haven't been able to look at my Facebook page in years because it constantly reminded me that people I went to school with are now either successful or just have stability in their lives and don't struggle this much. So that's the reason(s) I'm leaving.

Right now I need to focus on my mental health, polishing my resume and my portfolio. It really feels bittersweet because I really did enjoy giving you guys new content and being creative but it's time to spread my wings, try new things and maybe finally become a responsible adult. Once again, thank you all so, so much for the love and support you've given me. It was an incredible journey. I'll still be looking at my Tumblr from time to time so I won't be completely gone, just not making anything new. You might see some occasional likes on your posts here and there. And I might do an update after some time if things do work out for me. But... Goodbye for now! ❤️❤️❤️

#what a way to be dramatic lol #thank you for the memories

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stylesticketexchange · 2 years

Photo

The Official STE Love on Tour 2022 Masterpost!

I meant it when I said we never really know when he will drop another tour on us, and here we are!

This is the post where you’re going to find the rules and regulations of posting/sending asks/etc. You must like and reblog this post to show that you understand. This is to make sure that we make this as smooth and easy for everyone as possible.

Everything is going under a cut, because it’s going to get long:

THE RULES

1a. When sending me an ask, I need you to be as clear and informational as possible. If you’re selling, I need:

The place of the show (and if it’s a city that has multiple shows, i need to know if it’s night 1,2,3 etc)

The date of the show (you can check here)

The price at which you’re selling your ticket. If you bought it off someone and are reselling, please be transparent! The whole point of the STE is we want to make sure fans get to see Harry.

Whether you’re ok or not with being contacted by DM

IF you’re selling on behalf of someone else

NEW: You must provide proof of purchase. Screenshots w/watermark, and screen recording. Failure to do so will result in your ask being deleted. You can upload those items here.

If you are buying, I need:

What show(s) you’re looking for (be specific with dates, please)

What part of the arena you want to be in

Whether you’re ok or not with being contacted by DM

1b. NEW: I will only post tickets that are being sold at what people paid for them, or lower, and below what they are going for on resale sites. I don’t care what the resale sites are selling them for: if you want to resell them that way, there are multiple options available to you.

I know buying tickets with the platinum pricing has been tough, so I have opted to allow people to sell their tickets for what they paid for them *on ticketmaster*. This means no resales, purchases off stubhub etc.

2a. Multiple asks/spam posts will be deleted. I promise I see your ask, and I will post it when I get the chance. This isn’t my day job! I have a strict 3-strike rule: if you spam ask me three times with the same ask, I will block.

2b. Followers who spam posts will also be blocked/banned from the account. Give people time to respond instead of spam-responding, please.

3. Anonymous asks will be screened and will not always be given priority. Since I can’t go through a blog to double check if it’s legit or not, I will give priority to those who send through asks non-anonymously.

4. I do try and screen every ask to make sure that I’ve not been duped by a bot or a scammer before I post or reblog. I’m still trying to figure out a way to combat that, but until then please do your own digging and only give out information you are comfortable giving out. I know this is a good community and I know we all want the same thing, but it’s important to know that there are people out there who will….not be so nice. That’s the dark underbelly of it all. That being said: if you think someone might be scamming you, feel free to message me and we can flag them on the blog!

5. I do not work for TM/Live Nation/etc. Most of the information I have, I have through taking a little time to research. While I am happy to answer questions, please do take a look for yourself first before sending me an ask about Ticketmaster policies or why certain things don’t work, etc!

6. If you do sell a ticket from here, please shoot me a message so I can edit the post/reblog it to say it’s sold! That way I can keep tabs on the ones that have been sold/unsold!

BLANK/NEW BLOGS

Going forward, if your tumblr blog is blank (i.e. you’ve made an account specifically to look for Harry Styles tickets and have zero posts - or even only posts about buying/selling/trading tickets) - you must provide us with one of the following -

an active twitter account

an active instagram account

as there is no way to possibly to make sure a tumblr account is legitimate if it has nothing on it. This is to ensure that you are indeed a real person, and that you’re not a bot/scammer.

NEW: If either of those accounts are less than a month old, I will not post your queries.

At the end of the day we want to protect everyone who comes looking onto stylesticketexchange, but there’s only so much I can do.

Failure to do so will result in your ask being deleted. There will be no three strike rule. It will be at the discretion of the mods of STE.

TRADES

Because the pricing is so askew right now, I will not be posting trades.

“BEST OFFERS”/Negotiations

We do not do ‘best offer’ or negotiations here!

Please be transparent with your asking price, and what you paid for it. We do not allow bidding wars on tickets. The whole purpose of the site is to make sure that tickets go to deserving fans. If we find that your ask is teetering on the ‘best offer’ line, we will shoot you a message to re-send.

Failure to do so or consistent ignoring of this rule will result in your ask being deleted.

Payments

The safest, easiest way to buy and sell right now is through PayPal Goods and Services. I ask that anyone selling or buying tickets use this method, but if you mutually agree on another method of payment, make sure you’ve read through the terms and services of those sites. PayPal is currently the only site that protects buyers should something go wrong. If you use Venmo/Cashapp etc, you do so at your own discretion.

The not-so fun stuff.

Because it’s all fun and games until someone gets hurt, right?

A reminder that while we would hope people are being honest and open about their tickets, a word of caution: make sure you are getting all the information and doing everything you can to protect yourself before making a decision to buy. That means:

Being aware of the people who are trying to scam money from others because they think they can make a quick buck.

Reading the rules/regulations of ticket resale sites such as stubhub/ticketmaster/stubhub/etc.

Not giving over *any* personal information that you’re not comfortable giving.

Do not give money over before you are sure you have the tickets. (come to a mutual agreement on the exchange!)

Make sure your tickets are real - you never know what people are capable of!

If you’re going to pick up tickets, make sure you’re in a public space, or with a friend/family member.

I hate that any of it has to be said at all, but I have heard absolute horror stories of ticket fraud and people being taken advantage of. We all want to see Harry, and I want to help people do that - but you do have to be aware of the dangers and repercussions of doing ticket exchanges or buying tickets from resale sites.

I am always happy to help out in any way. If you believe that something suspicious is going on, please feel free to shoot me a message and we will go through it together!

I think that’s it! On a personal note: I’m not here all the time: I am dealing with a sick family member and the pandemic and my own life. I do this out of the kindness of my heart and in my spare time. If I don’t respond or post right away chances are I am not here. I do my best, and all I ask for is a little patience in return.

I will more than likely add things to this post as time goes on, and thank you for reading/liking/reblogging. Thank you for supporting stylesticketexchange and helping fellow fans see Harry in concert. Here’s to Tour 2022!

x STE

ps: if you’ve truly read this you will like and reblog it before you send an ask :)

#stylesticketexchange #hslot22 #hs2t2: 2022 #harry styles #masterpost #updated: 05.27.2022

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theweasleysredhair · 4 years

Text

Baby Love [F.W.]

Character: Fred Weasley

Word Count: 1693

Requested?: Yes/No

Summary: Looking after Teddy Lupin makes Fred decide he wants a baby of his own with you.

Tags: @gracemayhateyou @criminalyetminimal @firewhisky-kisses @obsessedwithrandomthings @angelinathebook @iprobablyshipit91 @potterverseimagine @slytherineheir @kpopgirlbtssvt @rexorangecouny @mytreec @hemmoporro @thisismysketchbook @acciotwinz @shadowsinger11 @aaannabbanana @lestersglitterglue @anyasthoughts @lxncelot @harrypotter289 @wand3ringr0s3 @ickle-ronniekins @sehunasbitch @cryingforcrystalpepsi @kashishwrites @girl-next-door-writes @susceptible-but-siriusexual @crissdanvers @whizbangs-78 @heart-of-tempered-steel @oh-for-merlins-sake | message or send an ask to be added/removed!

Disclaimer: Gif isn't mine, credit to whoever made it

A/n: just a reminder that this is a queued post! i’m currently taking a small break from tumblr (should be back by the end of the week though!) as i am not in a good place at the moment. feel free to continue sending in asks and messages whilst i’m away - i’ll answer as soon as i’m back online! i shall also catch up on things that i’ve been tagged in and fics i’ve missed then as well! ❤️❤️ to the requester - i hope you enjoy my love! 💕

~*~

PLEASE DO NOT REPOST MY WORK! REBLOGS ARE ABSOLUTELY FINE! <3

+ + + + +

“Never seen him so content,” you hummed to Hermione, a smile playing at your lips as you nodded over to Fred, who was sitting on a nearby couch in the living room of the Burrow, where everyone had gathered for Christmas - the second one since the Battle of Hogwarts - holding a tiny toddler, who was giggling at Fred’s attempts to make him laugh, hair turning a bright blue as he threw his arms into the air.

Hermione laughed, “He’s always loved Teddy.” “He reminds him of Lupin I reckon,” you replied, not having to mention the reason why, considering the small boy looked just like him. Fred, you knew, felt indebted to Lupin, since he was the one to bring George back to the Burrow when he lost his ear - kept him safe after the incident, travelling back quickly to save him. You knew that was one of the reasons Fred offered to look after Teddy so often - that and the fact that the baby adored him.

“Are you not thinking about children yet?” Hermione asked you, breaking you from your thoughts, “I’d have thought with the way he can never keep his hands off you that you’d be pregnant by now.”

You let out a laugh, knowing she wasn’t exactly wrong - Fred always had at least an arm around you or a hand on your waist, always pulling you into his lap and kissing you when he got the chance. And he’d only gotten worse since you were married a few months ago, thoroughly enjoying the new house you’d moved into after the wedding and all the privacy it gave you both - George had learnt to knock on the door when he arrived rather than apparating in immediately, after finding you both in a rather compromising position on the kitchen counter one time.

“Well, I mean obviously we’d love to have a baby... it’s just, well we both got hurt pretty badly in the battle and each had to deal with nearly dying,” you spoke, earning a sympathetic look as thoughts of the battle crossed both your minds.

Fred had nearly been hit by a wall falling in an explosion - he had been knocked unconscious and the moment you saw him laying on the floor of the Great Hall, you’d assumed the worst, until Molly had assured you with a watery nod that he was okay. Then when the battle recommenced, you’d had your leg crushed by falling debris, not being able to dodge spells fast enough, meaning you were nearly hit with the killing curse, had George not have pulled you out of the way in time.

The battle overall took its toll on you both, causing flashbacks and nightmares for the first year or so, only just beginning to ease when you and Fred decided to get married a couple of months back, wanting to make things official after years of dating.

“We just haven’t had the time to plan for a baby. Plus, we’re still really young,” you continued, shrugging your shoulders a little before turning your gaze to Fred, who was preoccupied by baby Teddy, pulling faces at him and playing peek-a-boo, not being able to help the smile that graced your lips, “But maybe having a baby would be a good thing.”

“He’d be a great dad,” Hermione grinned, seeing the way your eyes lit up as you watched your husband cradling the toddler in his arms, even as Teddy decided to grab a hold of Fred’s ginger locks, pulling at them happily.

“The best,” you nodded with a content smile. You excused yourself from Hermione as you saw Teddy reaching out in your direction, stuttering out what you assumed was his attempt at saying your name, clambering over Fred’s lap to get to you.

“I’m here baba, I’m right here,” you cooed, scooping the now-sandy haired toddler up into your arms and giving him a hug, his little chubby arms wrapping around you as best they could. You marvelled at how much he resembled Remus, the same tiny smile on his face.

“Be careful, he likes hair now apparently,” Fred grumbled, rubbing a patch on his head that you assumed Teddy had yanked. You laughed as you sat beside him, nudging his side a little with a wink, “I thought you liked having your hair pulled.”

“I do, but only when it’s you that does it, not when a baby does it with the intention of making me bald,” Fred replied, but despite himself he was smiling at Teddy, who had curled up in your lap and was babbling nonsense to you both.

You glanced up, noticing a presence watching you, finding Molly stood in the doorway to the kitchen, holding a spatula and practically cooing at the sight of her son and his wife looking after a baby.

“Oh you remind me of me and Arthur when we had our Bill,” she gushed, waving the spatula in your direction. You smiled at her warmly and shifted the toddler a little, Fred holding his tiny hand in his much larger one.

“I’m assuming Bill was a lot calmer than the rest of them, eh Molly,” you laughed, watching as she nodded immediately, nearly sighing as she thought back to her other children.

“Indeed. Charlie was a nightmare, always finding creatures from the garden and claiming them as his pets - once found a Doxy in his room that he’d been keeping from me, if you can believe it! An absolute pest, had to get rid of it as soon as I could. Percy was a good child, very smart. Almost as good as Bill. And then came you two,” she pointed the spatula at Fred who mocked innocence and pointed to himself in shock, “Who were nightmares. Then there was Ron and Ginny, but they were almost easy compared to the twins.”

Fred grinned smugly, “We enjoy keeping you on your toes, mother dearest, what can we say.”

Molly hummed disapprovingly at him, “I can’t wait until you both have a baby - for your sake, Y/n, dear, I hope they’re like Bill. For your sake, Fred, I hope they’re like you were, an absolute terror.”

Fred’s jaw dropped comically, absent-mindedly taking Teddy from you as he crawled on his lap, jogging him up and down on his knee, “Terror? Me? As if. I’m the light of your life. Besides, it’s awfully forward of you to think we’re having a child, Mum.”

“Oh look at you both with him,” Molly gestured pointedly at the toddler, who was happily playing with Fred’s jumper, “You’re parents already, you just need a baby of your own.”

With that, she turned to head back into the kitchen, as Fred turned to you, wiggling his eyebrows, “What d’ya reckon, eh love? Want a baby with me?”

“Already picked the names,” you joked, taking Teddy back from him and lifting him up in the air, making him squeal in delight, waving his little fists around.

Fred grinned, then found himself watching the way you were holding Teddy, the way you were cradling him so gently, making him smile and laugh. He bit his lip, imagining what it would be like with his own baby - one with his ginger hair, his nose, and your eyes and lips. One that was half him and half you.

All through the rest of the gathering, all through playing games with his family, talking about how Bill and Fleur were expecting their baby in April, and how Hermione was doing working in the Ministry, all he was thinking about was starting a family with you, watching as you cared for Teddy, to give Harry and Ginny and few hours alone before they took him back for the evening.

And as he sat, arm slung around your shoulder, Teddy now asleep across both of your laps, he decided he wanted his own baby with you.

Later that night, after you’d returned Teddy to his godfather, you and Fred retreated back to the room you were staying in in the Burrow. You lay on the bed, watching your husband move around the room, seemingly deep in his own mind as you watched him bump into the corner of the cabinet twice, and nearly trip over the rug, before you spoke, “What’s on your mind, Freddie?”

He paused in place, having removed his trousers and instead stood in a shirt and his boxers, “Just thinking about Teddy... and you... and how good you are with him.”

“You’re pretty good with him too, you know, he loves you. Kept asking for his ‘Unca Fwed’ when I gave him back to Harry,” you laughed a little, shaking your head.

Fred grinned, “He’s pretty cute, huh? Been wondering what it’d be like to have him around all the time. Except not him, but a different baby. Our baby, to be precise.”

“You want a baby?”

Fred nodded, almost shyly as he pulled his shirt off and threw it over to you, you swapping the shirt you were wearing for his, happily breathing in the smell of him clinging to the fabric.

You smiled at him, holding your arms out to him as he crawled up the bed until his body hovered above yours, leaning on his forearms on either side of your head.

Wrapping arms around neck, you leaned up to brush your lips against his, “I’d love to have a baby with you, Freddie.”

He nudged his nose against yours, humming contently, “Yeah?” “Yeah,” you confirmed with a soft smile, kissing him gently, “Imagine, we could have one by next Christmas, or one on the way.”

“Maybe babies. Multiples run in the family, you know,” he murmured, moving to place kisses along your jawline and you felt him grin against your skin.

“I’m not having twins,” you deadpanned, shaking your head at him fondly as you scoffed out a laugh. Fred pulled back a little, still grinning back at you cheekily as he gently rocked his hips against yours, making your head fall back against the pillow,

“Oh yeah? We’ll see about that, love.”

#fred weasley #fred weasley x reader #fred weasley imagine #fred weasley imagines #hp #harry potter #all queue have to do is follow the spiders

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ao719 · 2 years

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It’s Choices Fandom Shoutout day for @choicesfandomappreciation and I’m about to get into this ridiculous long-ass ramble that absolutely no one asked for.

When I found this fandom back in 2018, I spent most of my early days here as a lurker because I was too afraid to interact with anyone. I never had any intention of writing anything; the thought of it didn’t even cross my mind. I stumbled across Tumblr by total accident and found all of these amazing stories about these characters that I loved, and I just wanted to read. That was it. After about a month, I finally made an account and officially joined the fandom.

Not too long after that, I had a random idea pop up in my head, and for some godforsaken reason that I still can’t figure out, I decided to write it down. A few days later, after talking myself out of posting and then somehow managing to talk myself back into it, I bit the bullet and posted my first fic.

I had never written anything before that, and for me to post a story that I wrote was entirely out of my comfort zone and was a pretty huge deal for me. I have never been someone who does something where I intentionally set myself up, knowing there is a very good and more than likely chance that I will fail miserably; I tend to play it safe and stick to what I know. And social media on any platform can be a pretty intimidating and terrifying place when you open yourself up, especially to strangers, even by way of posting a measly little fanfic.

I didn’t tag anyone in that first fic because I didn’t talk to or know anyone at that point to tag, but I ended up getting a few “hey, tag me in your next fic” comments. And I was the epitome of this gif that day:

It’s been three years since I posted that first little drabble. In that time, like most people here, I’ve had my ups and downs on this hellsite. I’ve had good days and bad days, days where I feel content with what I’ve written, and days where I’m drowning in self-doubt. But in that time I’ve interacted with some incredible people. Every single like, comment, reblog, every keysmash, every message I’ve received saying something that I wrote made someone smile, laugh, or even cry, every ask I’ve received, every follower, they’ve all meant so much to me. Your kind words, fun interactions, and everything in between is what has made me want to continue to write and be a part of this crazy fandom. It’s a place where I get to escape everyday life because Choices and writing is my guilty pleasure and my dirty little secret that absolutely no one in my real life knows about. I have this little corner where I can come and vent/cry/scream/laugh/rage over pixels that no one would understand except you guys. I’ve talked to so many amazing people from all over, I’ve gotten to bring out this passion for writing that I never even knew I had while reading amazing stories by crazy talented individuals. And most importantly, I’ve made some of the most incredible friends.

Seriously, if you made it this far, bless.

So I just wanted to take this chance to say thank you for all of your support and encouragement because I know I don’t say or show it nearly enough. Honestly, some of y’all deserve goddamn medals for putting up with my shit 🥲

And as for the friendships I’ve made - I hope you know how much I adore each of you. Thank you for making me laugh and smile, for the help that you’ve given me, for brainstorming and prereading, for keysmashing, for listening, for simping over and simultaneously hating these ridiculous pixels, for being there through Tumblr life and real life, all of it. I love and appreciate you more than you know 💕

I’m tagging some people - but please, if I’ve forgotten anyone, I’m so, so sorry. This entire thing has been giving me anxiety all day and I gots the bubble gut because I do not want to leave anyone out 😰

@cocomaxley @emichelle @zaffrenotes @the-soot-sprite @dcbbw @sirbeepsalot @txemrn @bbrandy2002 @burnsoslow @charlotteg234 @debramcg1106 @neotericthemis @kat-tia801 @sincerelyella @sweetest-marbear @choiceskatie @forallthatitsworth @foreverethereal123 @xpandabeardontcarex @sfb123 @queenrileyrose @princessleac1 @iplaydrake @cordonia-gothqueen @gkittylove99 @khoicesbyk and everyone else I’m forgetting because I cannot think straight.

@storyofmychoices I know we’ve not interacted much but I have to give a special shoutout to you. Your kindness in this fandom is unmatched and so needed. From your SpreadJoy campaign to helping to host events such as this from your @choicesfandomappreciation page, you are truly a remarkable person. Thank you for being a huge part of the reason this fandom stays alive and kicking and for putting so much time and effort into making sure others feel appreciated ♥️

#ChoicesFandomShoutout #choicesfandomappreciation

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homoose · 3 years

Text

Love Has a Learning Curve: Part VII (x reader)

Summary: Reader tries to make things right, with a little push from her mama.

Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!reader

Category: hurt/comfort

Warnings/Includes: none

a/n: I know, I know— please just let our babies be happy ♥️ and so it was. Also, big ups to my tumblr gf @idmakeitbehave for being my beta the past two chapters.

Series Masterlist

———

One week.

That’s how long it had been since their argument. Spencer had driven back to his apartment in silence, absolutely stunned by the way things had blown up.

They’d gotten back from the case in Utah on the fifth of January, and he’d driven straight to Y/N’s, ready to give her a belated New Year’s kiss. Immediately upon entering her apartment, he knew something was wrong. Her hug was stiff, her kiss brief, her eye contact minimal. He’d spent the night, but they barely touched, and she left early for work without waking him. He’d let himself out and texted her later in the day to invite her over for dinner.

Dinner hadn’t been any less awkward, and when he felt awkward, he knew it was bad. He finally couldn’t ignore it any longer, and he’d called it out. He had expected some resistance, but he hadn’t expected that. Y/N never spoke to him with any malice at all, even when he was actually doing something that irritated her. She was the queen of healthy communication. So for her to speak to him like that meant that the underlying issue was much, much worse than he’d originally thought.

He’d gone over their conversations a thousand times, looking desperately for the moment that it went wrong. After some deep consideration, he was certain that something had happened on New Year’s Eve. He just wasn’t sure what. Y/N was insistent that she wasn’t bothered by the declined call, but he still wished he could go back in time and answer it. He was pretty sure the seeds of their argument had sprouted in that moment, regardless of what she said.

Spencer knew she was a creature of habit, and that sometimes she needed space to process and experience her emotions. And if he was being honest, he needed some space after the argument, too. But usually she would have at least texted him by now.

He sighed and set down his newspaper, realizing he’d read the same page four times and hadn’t retained any of it. It was Friday, and he knew she was working. But still his fingers itched to dial her number. He picked up the phone, pressing a key to light up the screen yet again.

No new messages.

He dropped the phone back to the table with a little more force than was necessary. He decided he’d give her the rest of the weekend. If he didn’t hear from her by Sunday, he’d have to do something.

…

Y/N dropped her bag on the floor inside the door and turned to lock the deadbolt. She had managed to sneak out of the building without being stopped by Anita, and she thanked the universe for small miracles.

She didn’t want to have to explain herself. She didn’t want anyone to know what an absolute troll she’d been. Considering that Sam and Spencer had practically become attached at the hip since they’d started hanging out more, Anita was bound to ask about him.

She showered and ordered Thai food, snuggling down on the couch to watch a movie with Roald. She settled on Dumplin’— a favorite for the body positivity, the southern drawls, and the Dolly Parton drag.

And then she came to the argument outside of Harpy’s and lost what little emotional stability she had left.

“Never took you for the type that cares much what people think.”

“I can’t, Bo. And that might make me a coward, but—”

“It does. Willowdean Dixon, I think you’re beautiful. To hell with anyone who’s ever made you feel less than that.”

She didn’t realize she was crying until Roald meowed in distress. She choked out a sob and stroked over his ears, closing her eyes in defeat. “I really fucked this up, huh?”

It had only been one week, but it felt like years since Spencer walked out of her apartment. She’d stayed in bed for the entire weekend, crying on and off. She knew she had no one to blame but herself. Owen had knocked over the first domino, but she’d done nothing to stop the rest from falling.

Spencer had done everything right. He’d done everything she asked, and she’d thrown it all back in his face. He had made the comparison to Mitchell Park, and he was absolutely right. She’d done the exact same thing, only she had almost a year’s worth of ammunition, and she cut a hell of a lot deeper.

Roald nuzzled against her, but she nudged him away— she didn’t even deserve the comfort. Instead, she fumbled in the couch cushions for her phone, swiping open the screen and tapping her favorites list, thumb hovering over Spencer’s name. Then she tapped on the name right above it and blew out a breath.

The line connected and rang three times before she picked up. “Hey, sugar! Your ears must be ringin’, ‘cause I was just thinkin’ about callin’ you.”

“Hey, mama,” Y/N breathed.

Her mother’s tone changed from chipper to concerned in an instant. “What’s wrong, baby?”

She leaned forward to the coffee table to grab Spencer’s scarf— somehow left behind in her apartment— rubbing it between her fingers. “I— I really messed up.”

“Oh, Lord. You need bail money?”

Despite herself, Y/N laughed wetly. “Oh my god , mama. No, I don’t need bail money.”

“Well, if you made bail it can’t be that bad,” Rose insisted.

“I didn’t— I’m not in jail, for Christ’s sake.” Y/N ran a hand over her face. “I messed things up with Spencer.”

“Well, we can fix that,” Rose responded matter of factly. “What happened?”

“We were fighting, and I said some really, really awful things,” Y/N admitted, tears spilling over her lash line.

Rose scoffed. “Honey, I say awful things to your father all the time, and we’ve been married almost 40 years.”

Y/N heaved a long sigh. “Not like this, mama.”

Her mother hummed in consideration. “Well, what were y’all fightin’ about?”

“It’s complicated,” Y/N hedged, toying with the fringe of the scarf.

Rose clicked her tongue. “Do ya want my help or not?”

Y/N dropped her head back against the couch. “I ran into Owen on New Year’s Eve—”

“Well, I hope you told him to stick it where the sun don’t shine,” Rose practically growled.

Y/N closed her eyes as the tears tracked hot down her cheeks. “I didn’t. I— I let him get under my skin, and then I didn’t want to tell Spencer about it because it’s embarrassing, but he knew something was wrong, and he wouldn’t stop asking about it.” She had to pause and suck in a hiccuping breath, releasing it on a sob. “So I yelled at him and said all kinds of terrible things, and then he left, and now I think maybe we broke up, and I’ve literally never been so sad in my whole life.”

There was a long pause on the other end of the phone, and then she heard Rose sniffling. “Really shoulda had your brothers knock the mess out of that son of bitch when we had the chance. He's been gone five years, and he’s still hurtin’ you every chance he gets.”

Y/N swiped uselessly at the tear tracks on her cheeks, sniffling pathetically. “And now I hurt the person who’s spent the last year singlehandedly undoing all of his awful handiwork.”

“Oh, sweetheart,” Rose cooed. Y/N could hear the creak of the floorboards as her mother walked through her childhood home. “You said he knew somethin’ was wrong, right? I can almost guarantee that he’s still just wonderin’ what’s goin’ on. I know he’s supposed to be a genius, but he’s still a man. And men are dumb, sugar. You gotta spell it out for ‘em. Have you talked to him since?”

“No.” Fresh tears spilled over Y/N’s lashes as the thoughts that had kept her from calling him spilled out of her mouth. “What if it was too far? What if I ruined everything? What if he never wants to speak to me again?”

Ross heaved out a long breath. “That’s a lot of what ifs, Y/N.”

“What if I’m right?” she whispered.

“And what if you’re not?” Rose countered. “That boy loves you. Anyone could see that, clear as day. He’d do just about anything for you.” Rose paused, and Y/N heard the springs of the bed squeak as she sat. “But you gotta let him, sweetheart. Right now you’re takin’ away his chance to do that. You’re makin’ the decision for him.”

Y/N listened as her mother’s advice crackled over the line, and for the first time in a week, she felt a tiny sliver of hope.

“If he doesn’t want to be with you anymore, you need to let him tell you that. Don’t settle for a what if. Find out for sure, or you're gonna spend the rest of your life worryin’ and wonderin’, sugar.”

…

That evening found Spencer in his usual spot on the couch, reclined against the arm with a book in hand. He’d promised himself he’d give Y/N the weekend to herself— that he’d let her come to him. That didn’t stop him from checking his phone obsessively; it never buzzed with any new calls or messages, but he still looked every seven minutes.

The sound of the buzzer jolted his body to attention. He checked his watch and drew his brows together before closing his book and scrambling to cross to the intercom, a tiny seed of hope beginning to germinate. He pressed the button to talk, calling, “Yes?” into the speaker box and then listening for the response.

“Hi.”

Her voice was so quiet that he could barely hear it over the crackle of the speaker. He buzzed her in without hesitation, crossing to the door and opening it immediately. She made her way slowly up the stairs, turning at the top of the landing and pausing.

His heart broke at the sight of her. She looked utterly exhausted, dressed in black sweatpants and a soft purple sweater, a black puffer jacket over top. She was holding his scarf, wringing it in between her hands. Her eyes were ringed red, and the bags under them were worse than his.

He watched as she crossed the landing, coming to stand quietly in front of him. He’d known something was wrong, but the way she looked now made him wonder just how long she’d been battling whatever private demons she wouldn’t let him in on.

“I, um.” She cleared her throat, and it was clear she’d been crying from the thickness of her voice. “I have a lot to say— again. But since I was such an asshole, I wanted to give you the opportunity to say anything you need to say first.”

He’d imagined this conversation countless times over the last week, and never once had he thought it would start like this. “Um. Well. You— you really hurt me.”

She could barely look at him. “I know.”

He swallowed. “Please don’t do that again.”

She shook her head, finally meeting his eyes. “I won’t. I won’t ever again.”

Spencer tucked his hands into the pockets of his lounge pants. “I know I may not be the best at social cues, but I’m a pretty good profiler. And I can tell when something’s wrong.” He raised his eyebrows. “You don’t have to tell me everything. I’m just asking you to tell me when I do something that makes you upset.”

“You— you didn’t do anything wrong. I—” He watched her squeeze her eyes shut. “God, I’m so sorry, Spencer. I’m just— I’m sorry for so many things. For lying about being fine, for being up on my high horse about communicating and then not actually doing it, for being an absolute bitch.”

He wanted to argue— she wasn’t a bitch— but he could tell she was far from done.

“I— I thought therapy was supposed to teach me how to talk about things, but this still feels… impossible to say out loud,” she admitted, fingers fumbling with the fabric of the scarf. “It’s embarrassing and ridiculous. But I— I have deep-seated insecurities. That I’m not really that smart or interesting or particularly special.”

He thought back to that night in Mitchell Park and felt the guilt all over again. He’d practically said those exact words to her— it was no wonder she was feeling this way.

“And every person that I’ve ever been with has— really reinforced those ideas, so for a long time they were just… a set part of my self-image,” she explained, dragging a hand over her messy hair. “I thought— I thought that I was over it, but I— I don’t know. Maybe you never really are.”

His brain sorted through every moment of their year together, pinging off the countless examples of her self-doubt and insecurity. She was easily the most wonderful person he knew, but he could clearly see the cracks in the facade if he looked close enough. How had he missed it for so long?

“And then I met you, and you…” Y/N let out a wry laugh. “You’re easily the most interesting person I’ve ever met, but you made me feel like… I don’t know, like I’m interesting, too. Like I’m worthy of being with you, like I’m— like I’m good enough.”

He felt his heart splintering into a thousand tiny shards— good enough?

“But I can’t— I still have a hard time believing it sometimes. And I— I’ve been letting myself keep you at arms length. Letting you see parts of me, but… never giving you everything,” she admitted.

He watched her struggle to get the words out, her voice thick with the act of holding back sobs. He hadn’t realized she was carrying all of this. She was so good at supporting him and loving him through all of his trauma and issues, he hadn’t stopped to consider just how much she needed him, too.

She continued, “It’s why I took so long to say I love you… why I couldn’t talk to you last week. Because I just—” She shrugged as the tears rolled down her cheeks. “I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop. For you to realize that I’m really nothing special. That you’re getting bored, or there’s someone who’s a better fit for you, or one million other things. That I’m needy, and annoying, and too much work.”

A fresh tear tracked down her cheek, and he felt his own eyes filling. She never failed to put a stop to his own insecurities— reminding him that she liked his rambling, that he wasn’t irritating, that he was just the right amount. In his eyes, she was perfect. He would have never guessed she felt this way about herself.

She continued, “That’s what happened before, and none of those guys were even half as wonderful as you are.” She swiped a hand haphazardly over her cheeks, looking at him sheepishly. “And then I was hurtful and awful, and I realized that I was just creating a self fulfilling prophecy and I don’t— I don’t want to do that.”

Her hand shook a little as she brought it back down to twist in his scarf. “Because it’s never— I’ve never felt like this. I've never been this happy with anyone else, and I don’t want to give that up. I don’t want to give you up. Even if sometimes I feel like I’ll never be enough.”

Her voice cracked on a stifled cry, and his chest physically ached. “And if you never want to see me again, I completely understand, and I’ll leave you alone, but I— I’m just so sorry. And I love you so much, and I’m trying so hard to be better.” She sucked in a ragged breath and let it out on an exhausted sigh. “And that’s, um— that’s it. If you want me to go, I—”

“I don’t want you to go,” he interrupted.

Her eyes went wide. “You don’t?”

“Of course not.” Spencer stepped forward and reached for her. “Of course not. C’mere.”

As soon as the words left his mouth, she was tumbling into his arms with a choked off sob. He pulled her inside and closed the door behind them, walking her to the couch and sitting them both down. She clung to him like she was afraid he’d disappear into thin air.

“Y/N, I’m right here,” he assured her. “I’m right here, baby. I’m not going anywhere.”

“But if you n-need space, I understand,” she sobbed.

“I appreciate the offer, but I don’t need space. I think a week was long enough, don’t you?” he asked, pressing a kiss into her hair.

She pulled back out of the hug, head down. “But I really hurt you.”

He held her hand. “Yeah. And I really hurt you, too.”

She huffed out a breath. “That’s not how this works. I don’t get to hurt you just because you hurt me.”

“I know that.” He almost laughed at how indignant she sounded. “I’m not saying that we should hurt each other. I’m saying that sometimes it happens. And when it does, we apologize, and we forgive, and we move forward. And it’s okay if you need space. But I don’t.”

“What if you change your mind?” she whispered.

“Then I promise I’ll tell you.” Spencer tilted her chin up so he could meet her eyes. “I promise I’ll tell you what I need, as long as you tell me, too. We’ve gotta use all those communication skills we learn in therapy.”

Y/N nodded, and he pulled her into another hug. He closed his eyes, letting out a sigh of relief. “If I hadn’t heard from you by Sunday, I was planning to bother you until you talked to me.”

He could feel the beginning of a smile turning up the corner of her mouth where it was pressed to his shoulder. “You never bother me,” she mumbled. She held him for a moment longer and then released him from the hug and sat back, fidgeting with her hands and letting out a breath.

“Sometimes I need to be told that my worst fears about myself aren’t true,” she admitted. “I know that’s so annoying, but—”

“It’s not annoying,” he interrupted, putting an immediate stop to that line of thought. “Telling you how amazing you are isn’t the chore that you think it is. I’m sorry that anyone ever convinced you that it was.”

He covered her hands with his own, rubbing his thumbs softly along her skin. He couldn’t stop thinking about her dealing with all of this by herself. He hated that she’d ever felt anything less than adored. More than anything, he hated that he hadn’t been able to help her through it. And he wanted to make sure that he never made that mistake again.

“A wise man told me once... that love is helping someone navigate their storms,” he murmured, squeezing her hand. She looked at him then, and he continued, “You’ve been my lighthouse for a long time, Y/N. And I— I’m trying desperately to be yours… But you have to let me.”

Her eyes filled with fresh tears, but she nodded. He let out a long breath and pulled her hands into his lap. “I understand that sometimes you need space, and that’s fine. I’m happy to give you whatever you need.”

He shook his head. “Just— please don’t try to weather the storm by yourself. You can’t do it all alone; no one can.” He smiled ruefully. “I can tell you from experience that’s pretty much a guaranteed way to capsize your boat.”

His voice cracked a little at the end, and he felt a tear slip over his lash line. “I’ll help you repair your boat, or build a new one, or you can just float on mine for a while. It’s not perfect but it’s pretty sturdy, I think.”

She brought her fingers up to brush at his damp cheeks, and he met her eyes. “What I’m not going to do is let you float out on the ocean by yourself. I love you too much.”

She was quiet for a long moment, sniffling a little and just watching him— almost like she couldn’t believe he was there. She brought her hand back to his and laced their fingers together, rubbing her thumb along his skin. “I love you the most.”

“Agree to disagree.” He gave her a small smile and leaned forward to press his lips to her forehead. “Want some tea?”

She was frowning when he pulled back, her brows drawn together. “I need to tell you about Owen.”

The conversation he’d had with Anita was suddenly on replay in Spencer’s head.

… a real piece of shit… telling her lies about herself… isolating her… destroying her from the inside out...

He squeezed her hand. “You don’t have to tell me if you’re not ready. You don’t have to tell me at all if you don’t want to.”

She shook her head. “Talking about him takes away his power. I have to stop letting him have so much sway over my emotions.” She looked at him then. “I do things I regret and hurt people I love.”

He brought their joined hands up his lips. “Well, I’m here either way. And I’m still going to make you some tea.”

He stood and pulled her up with him, bringing her into the kitchen and refusing to let go of her hand. He filled the kettle and turned it on, found a bag of her favorite tea and ripped it open with his teeth. He dropped the bag into her favorite mug, and then made a mug up for himself.

“You know, it’d be a lot easier if you’d let go,” she said, the hint of a smile in her voice.

“Mhm,” he agreed, but he made no move to release her hand. In fact, once he’d fumbled a spoonful of honey into each of the cups, he dropped the spoon into her mug and turned to pull her into another hug. He hooked his chin over her shoulder and closed his eyes as she brought her arms around his waist. “I missed you,” he whispered.

She squeezed him tight. “I missed you, too. I’m so sorry.”

She buried her face in his neck, and he felt her breathe him in. He pressed a kiss into her shoulder and then settled his chin again. “Apology accepted, in case it wasn’t clear.”

They stood like that until the kettle began to whistle, and then Spencer kept her tucked underneath his arm as he turned to shut it off and pour the water into the mugs. They each grabbed a mug, making their way back to the couch and setting them on the coffee table to steep. Spencer kept their fingers intertwined and stayed quiet, letting her set the pace of the conversation.

Y/N took a deep breath and let it out on a long sigh. “I guess I should start at the beginning. I, um— I had my first boyfriend in high-school: Cal Cunningham. He was older and cooler, and so I felt— I don’t know… special when he picked me.” She rolled her eyes. “In reality, he was rude, and arrogant, and kind of a misogynist. We didn’t date for very long, but it kind of… set me up on this path of dating guys who weren’t very nice.”

Spencer ran his thumb soothingly along hers, waiting for her to continue. “When I started college, I dated this guy Adam for a few months. He was nice enough but really self-centered and a little immature. When we broke up I just wanted to be on my own for a while.”

“I was single for two years after that, just kind of… finding myself and whatever.” Her eyes tracked the path his thumb traced along her skin. “So when I started dating Owen at the end of junior year, it felt like my first real relationship. Like— we were both adults, and he dressed up for our dates, and he paid for things and bought me flowers and fit all the cliches.”

“And it was great at first,” she admitted. “We had a lot of the same friends, so we’d been hanging out for a while before we got together. He was a perfect gentleman— and smart, accomplished, and ambitious. I fell fast, and I fell hard, and we were sort of— it feels so stupid to say this, but it felt like we were an it couple.”

“A few of us made plans to move to DC after graduation— my friend Jess and her boyfriend Chris, Sam and Anita,” she explained. “And Owen and I, obviously. We moved in together in an apartment downtown. And that’s when everything changed.”

She drew her brows together. “It was little things at first. Like he’d jokingly call me stupid for forgetting something, or he’d complain about one of my friends being annoying. But it snowballed pretty quickly. He’d tell me I was stupid, and he wasn’t joking. All of my friends irritated him to the point where we couldn’t hang out anymore— even our former mutual friends. He thought that teaching kindergarten was a mindless, pointless job.”

Spencer tried to keep his heart rate steady, his facial expressions neutral, but his blood pressure was on the rise. No one deserved to be spoken to like that, least of all Y/N.

She continued, “We spent the holidays at my parents’ the second year we were dating, and he spent the entire car ride home explaining, in detail, how ridiculous and low-class he thought everything was.”

She shook her head and rubbed her free hand over her face. “I know it’s insane that I stayed with him for five years, but I— he did a really good job of convincing me that I was... that I was nothing. That he was doing me a favor by loving me. That he could have anyone, but he chose me. No one else was going to, so I should be grateful.”

He balled his free hand into a fist to avoid squeezing her to death. When Anita had said Owen was a piece of shit… he hadn’t realized just how deeply she meant it.

She picked at the fabric of her sweatpants, staring intently at the tiny pills. “When someone says all of that to you on a daily basis, and you’re not hearing otherwise from anyone else— because no one knew what was going on— when someone tells you you’re nothing… you start to believe it.”

Spencer relaxed his fist to bring his fingers up to her face, gently cupping her cheek. She leaned into his touch and closed her eyes for a long moment. He didn’t know what to say. Instead, he pressed his lips to her forehead in a voiceless assurance that she was, in fact, everything. He felt her relax under the warm pressure of his lips, and he hoped that was enough for now.

He sat back to let her continue. “We were together for five years, and we only broke up because he cheated on me. It was a long term affair; they were sleeping together for almost a year before I found out. And… a lot of people knew. Almost all of his friends knew. But I didn’t. I was still being this ridiculous, desperate little Suzy Homemaker trying to make him happy, even though he was still treating me like shit.”

She laughed, but there wasn’t an ounce of humor in it. “When I found out, I wasn’t even hurt. I was… embarrassed, I guess. But I was so relieved. I was so fucking relieved that I had a way out.”

He watched as her shoulders settled, almost like an actual weight had been lifted off of them. “I got a therapist and dropped all of the friends that were still hanging around with him. I moved to a new neighborhood, started hanging out with Anita and Sam, and just— started fresh. And I was doing really well. I’ve had my moments of insecurity here and there, but for the most part, I’ve been able to recognize the moments when I’m falling back into old thought patterns.”

She looked at him then, and her eyes were so soft and lovely that his heart ached. “You’re a big reason for that. You’re so open with how you feel about me, and… it makes things a lot easier.” She dropped her gaze with a sigh. “But I— he was at the party on New Year's. And I didn’t know he was going to be there until I was already there , and then it felt stupid to leave. I thought I could handle it—”

“And then I didn’t answer your call.”

“No, no .” She shook her head and reached her free hand out to grasp his arm. “That’s— Spencer, none of this is your fault.” She furrowed her brow, and the crease between them was practically an abyss. “He sort of— cornered me on the patio. I hadn’t seen him in like, four years? And he was complimenting me, and asking about you, and then he tried to— well, he did kiss me actually. I shoved him off, and he didn’t like that, and he did his whole Owen thing. Told me that he’d cheated because I was uninteresting and worthless. That eventually you’d get bored of me, too. Just, um— generally awful shit.”

She took a deep breath, and the rest steamrolled off her tongue and over his heart. “And then he just— left . And he’d absolutely demolished my self-image in less than ten minutes, and I was embarrassed and angry at myself, and then you didn’t answer, but I was kind of glad you didn’t because I didn’t actually want to talk about it. And I thought I could just move on, but then I was being weird, and you knew something was wrong. And I just wanted to pretend like it never happened, but then you kept pressing me on it, and I just— I didn’t want to have to explain it all to you because I was afraid that— that maybe he was right.”

Y/N dissolved back into the couch, an unwelcome indication of the emotional exhaustion that came with reliving trauma. Spencer moved closer and mirrored the position of her body against the cushions, bringing his face close enough to bump their noses together. They breathed the same air for one noiseless minute before she finally met his eyes.

“I need you to understand that not one single thing he said to you— on New Year’s or ever— was right, in either sense of the word. None of it was factual, and none of it was acceptable.”

She gave him a weary nod, and he continued, “You are the single best person that I know. You’re kind, brilliant, and driven. You’re interesting, and wonderful, and lovely. You’re my absolute favorite person on the planet, and I will never get bored of you.”

He let his eyes trace over all the angles and curves of her face, and then raised his eyebrows. “He’s lucky that I respect you enough not to go over your head, because what I’d like to do is run a full background check and find any and every possible transgression that could be legally investigated and then use that information to ruin his life.” He tilted his head in thought. “That or— get really jacked and then beat the shit out of him.”

“God, please don’t. As much as I’d love to watch that unfold,” she cupped his face in her hand, “you’re better than that. And he’s not worth either of our energies… I already wasted enough time dwelling on it and hurt you in the process.” She dropped her hand back to her lap with a sigh. “I spent so much time in that relationship that my brain didn’t know what to do with this good, healthy one.”

He took both of her hands in his, squeezing them tight and then pressing a kiss to the back of each. He wouldn’t commit assault, since she’d asked him not to. But he wasn’t going to let Owen taint any part of his life with her.

“I’m so sorry that someone you loved made you think it was hard to love you. Because loving you is the easiest thing I’ve ever done.” He pressed his lips together and mused, “But I think maybe love has a learning curve. Especially when you’re used to being hurt. You have to unlearn all the bullshit. People will have you thinking that you have to water yourself down, or change who you are, or make yourself more palatable. I thought that, too.”

He brushed her hair back away from her face and waited for her to meet his eyes. “And then I met you. And you love all of it— all of me. All the rambling, all the quirks, and— even the dark parts, too.”

She sniffled a little, but really smiled for the first time that night. “What’s not to love about you?”

He smiled back. “I’m not sure if you realize that I fully reciprocate that feeling. What’s not to love about you? I have a hard time thinking of even one thing about you that I don’t absolutely adore.”

“Even when I act like a horrid bitch?” she mumbled, only half joking.

He leaned his head against the couch cushion. “A year ago, you stood on my doorstep and gave me forgiveness— after I’d been a complete asshole to you... I told you then that I wanted to learn how to love with you. I still do. In all the wonderful, and the weird, and the terrible. Even when we get it wrong.”

He shrugged, and then ran a soft fingertip down the bridge of her nose. “There is no one else I’d rather get it wrong with. Because when we get it right… it’s the closest I’ve ever felt to magic.”

Her eyes sparkled with unshed tears, and she brought both hands up to his face, holding him with an adoration that made his own eyes burn. “You can believe that you love me the most,” she whispered, “but just know that you’re wrong.”

He leaned forward to close the distance between them, pressing a kiss to her lips with a reverence that felt technicolor and devout and more magical than any trick he’d ever mastered.

“Agree to disagree.”

———

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soramei · 3 years

Text

Intentional - Part 1

Pairing: Bang Chan x Reader (she/her)

Summary: Landing your first real job at JYPE was something short of a miracle. You were prepared to face the new struggles of this elusive career whilst moving to a new country, however, nothing could have prepared you for him. Will stolen glances, secret touches, and hushed nights spent in the recording room ever be enough for the both of you?

Genre: idol!bang chan au, forbidden relationship, coworkers to eventual lovers, slow burn

Warnings: none right now, eventual smut,

Word Count: 7.3k

Masterlist

A/N: hey yall this is my first ff im posting on tumblr :D im kinda scared to post but i hope anybody who stumbles on lil ol’ me will join me along the way :) also important!!! i made oc/reader asian cus i am lol (and this whole thing is basically a glorified self insert) so plz keep this in mind when reading!! oh god i didnt realize how slow this first part was sry...

The cold silence of the room felt like stabs at your inside. You commanded your feet to stop bouncing up and down as you unconsciously started to bite off the dead skin of your bottom lip. The white corporate light from above reflected off your brand new lanyard hanging delicately from your neck. You felt the coarse blue fabric rub against your neck as you mindlessly fiddled with your lanyard; the newly printed photo of your face stared back at you with a smile.

The creak of the door to your left was what broke you from your nervous fidgets. Whipping your head up from your lanyard, you immediately stood up ready to bow to whoever came through that door.

It was a girl. She looked around the same age as you, if not older. Her attire was what gave her away. Her appearance essentially mirrored yours: hair tied back into a ponytail with a white blouse and black work pants. She also had the familiar blue ‘JYPE’ labeled strap hanging from her neck.

“Hello,” you spoke meekly, scared to disturb the cold silence that had a hold on the room you were in.

“Hello,” she replied. “My name is Choi Na-eun, I’m the new social media strategist intern and today is my first day.”

This is so relieving, you thought, another newbie to share the stress with me.

“This is my first day too,” you perked up, “I’ll be starting as the new junior Chinese marketing assistant.”

Getting the acceptance email from JYP Entertainment was definitely a high point in your life. The feeling of butterflies swarming your insides as you clicked the email open only to see your acceptance was immediately locked as a core memory. All the years of memorizing thousands of Korean and English vocabulary flashcards, the panic attacks before your finance exams, and the many, many late night coffee breaks were worth it the moment you received your first legitimate job offer, and from the esteemed JYP Entertainment company no less.

“Chinese marketing?” Na-eun asked. “So you aren’t from here, I take it.”

You shook your head. “I am from China. I completed my degree a while ago with a major in Language and a minor in Business. To be honest, I’ve done internships back home, but it’s been my dream to move to a new country.”

All of what you said was true. Up until now, your surroundings have never changed in all of your twenty-three years living. From the walk with your grandmother to daycare to the vast campus of your university, the view of your city has never changed. Your social circle stayed stagnant since you were able to talk and your love life was — for a lack of a better word — uneventful.

It wasn’t until the day you decided to start applying for careers outside your home country that you felt hopeful. Hopeful that you could find an escape from your inert lifestyle and escape the burnout and stress that has been building up over the years. And so, on a day when you were feeling unusually confident, you gathered up the courage and spent hours sending out applications to organizations all over Asia that pertained to your specific degree. The applications were mainly for small jobs at small companies, however, your strange spike of motivation gave you the confidence to apply to the everso esteemed JYP Entertainment located in Korea. Of course you knew about this company — you and your friends played songs by ‘Twice’ nonstop back in highschool — but you didn’t realize the full power that this company had on the entertainment market until you did your full research. To say that you thought you had no chance was an understatement. This application was so far of a reach that you purposefully forced your mind to erase all memory of even applying.

However, with your education, your work experience, and whatever tiny bit of luck you had, you somehow made it through the initial application process. Then the next. And the next. Then the interview. And now, you were nervously sitting in this white painted room with Na-eun, in a completely new country, waiting for your manager to come greet you.

“So you’re from China? You’ve got to teach me chinese sometime.” Na-eun smiled.

You giggled in return while nodding your head. You were relieved that you’ve met a potential friend so early in your career in this company. This was one of your big worries. With your social circle being so stagnant for the majority of your life back in China, you rarely had the opportunity to meet new people, much less make new friends.

You were about to inquire more into Na-eun’s life when the door to your left abruptly opened. In the blink of an eye, three new people strutted in — two women and one man. They seemed to be higher status than you and Na-eun judging by their attire. All three were styled in some type of blazer and dress pants and there was no lanyard to be found on any of them.

“Hello new employees,” the man greeted. Judging by his face, he looked to be in his late thirties at the least. His hair was styled back neatly and his lips slanted up, giving him a fox-like appearance. “I am Executive Manager Kim. Joined beside me on the left is Social Media Manager An and to my right is Marketing Manager Chen.”

Both you and Na-eun immediately stood up to bow and introduce yourselves.

“Hello. My name is Choi Na-eun, I’m the new social media strategist intern.” Na-eun said.

“Hello. My name is y/n, I’m the new junior Chinese marketing assistant.” You repeated after her, copying exactly what she said. You did not want to screw anything up on your first day, especially your first impression.

Manager Kim reached over to Na-eun, introducing himself and giving her a firm handshake. He then slowly moved over to you, and reached for your hand.

“Y/n,” he gave time for your name to settle on his tongue as he gave a sly smile. “You’re not from here, aren't you?”

You shook your head ‘no’. “No, sir. I’m from China where I studied language and business. I hope to do well here as the Chinese marketing assistant.” You replied, mentally cursing yourself for sounding so timid.

“I’m glad to hear,” Manager Kim chuckled, “I’m sure you’ll treat me and your other managers well.”

You felt an uncomfortable shiver pass through you as he brushed his thumb along your hand before letting go. This feeling was excused as nervousness, after all, this was your first day and your first time meeting your higher-ups.

You introduced yourself to Manager Chen, assuming that she would be the one you were to assist in your time here at JYPE. Judging by her last name, you presumed that she was Chinese as well.

“Forgive me for being so straight up Manager Chen, but are you Chinese?” You asked.

“That is alright, y/n,” she smiled, “I’m not. My Husband is, but I’ve lived in China for more than half my life. I don’t want to brag, but my mandarin has gotten proficient over the past decade or so.”

Proficient? It’s amazing. You thought. This first day was turning out better than you thought. Other than the weird feeling you received from Manager Kim, everything was turning out splendid. A potential friend and a manager that could speak your first language.

“Since it’s about noon right now,” Manager Kim took a look at his watch, “What do you all think about some lunch?”

The other managers nod their heads in agreement and gestures for you and Na-eun to follow them out of the waiting room you were in for so long.

The whole building seemed so clean. With every corner lit, by natural light or artificial light, you could clearly see that every room, every piece of furniture and decor had been purposefully placed. You couldn’t help but have a stupid look of awe plastered on your face as you mindlessly follow your superiors over to the cafeteria.

You turned your head over to Na-eun and gave her a tilt of the eyebrow, silently saying wow, this is where we work.

With the turn of a corner and several silent strides, your little group made it to the cafeteria.

The difference between your claustrophobic waiting room and this vast room was astonishing. With countless tables and romantic yellow lighting, this place almost resembled a five star restaurant. You’ve never seen a cafeteria as extravagant and clean as this before. However, to be fair, you’ve never had the experience of working with such a large corporation before.

The managers led you to the serving station where you grabbed yourself a tray and proceeded to spoon small portions of rice and side dishes onto your plate. This cuisine was different to what you were used to, but nonetheless looked delicious. You were prepared for the small cultural differences, especially with the food, but from everything you’ve witnessed so far, the culture shock would be easier to overcome than what you’ve anticipated.

“Have this soup y/n,” Manager Kim’s grating voice came from in front of you, interrupting your inner monologue. “It’s good for your complexion.”

As Manager Kim hands over the bowl of soup, you feel the sleeve of his blazer brush up against your shoulder, causing the pit of your stomach to drop.

First day nerves. That was what this feeling was. You thought.

You quietly thanked him with a small nod and walked briskly from the service line, trying to find where Na-eun went with the other two managers. Thankfully, they were just a step away and you quickly made your way over to the comfortable spot beside Na-eun. She gave you a small grin and you both followed your way to a table right in the middle of the room.

Soon, all five chairs of the table got filled and sounds of chopsticks tapping and scraping against plates and bowls filled your ears. An awkward silence dominates your table as you start to pick at your food.

“So,” Manager Chen cleared her throat, “after lunch I was thinking we should go to a meeting room and discuss Miss. Y/n’s role in our new project.”

“I was thinking the same for our new Intern Choi.” Manager An cut in, “What do you think, Manager Kim?”

“It all sounds good. I will be accompanying Manager Chen to her meeting room as I wish to also further discuss the preliminary steps for our project.” Manager Kim looked from Manager Chen over to you.

“Project?” You ask.

“We’ve had a very successful year with our idol groups and we wanted to ride this success and start marketing in China. Recently, we’ve noticed a very large and growing Chinese audience for this group. I’m sure you’re very curious now, however we can discuss further details once we are in the meeting room.” Manager Chen replies while taking a sip of the water in her glass.

Manager Chen appeared to be a very professional and respectable woman. With prominent collarbones and wide shoulders, she easily looked the part of a confident and adored manager. She needed minimal makeup to highlight her tall cheekbones, and even with a short heel on her feet she seemed to tower over you. However, her warm and comforting voice was what broke her intimidating demeanour. Just listening to her voice felt like you were back in your high school classroom with your favourite teacher explaining the motif of a sad love poem.

After some more awkward conversations mixed with a few work discussions, the five of you finished the delicious food on your trays.

“Please excuse me whilst I head to the restroom” Na-eun spoke up after your group finished clearing the table.

“Please excuse me as well.” You quickly followed, bowing as you both ventured off to the washrooms.

I should get her number so I’m not completely a loner in this place, you thought to yourself. And so, after a quick inner struggle to speak up, you finally decided to ask.

“Hey, should we exchange contacts? I don’t wanna look like the newbie eating in the cafeteria alone after today.” You chuckled.

“Totally!” Na-eun beamed. “I was actually thinking the same thing…”

And so, you both quickly exchanged each other's contact as you made your way to the restrooms.

The hall of the washrooms were narrow, hidden away from the main cafeteria. You walked in, deciding you only wanted to retouch your hair and makeup before your first official meeting. You carefully fix the loose hairs that somehow escaped the confines of your elastic and dab on a fresh layer of foundation before applying your lipstick which rubbed off while eating. Looking over at Na-eun, you see she’s quite in the zone redoing her mascara.

“Hey, I’ll just wait for you in the hall.” You said.

Na-eun gave you a disinterested nod back as she kept focusing on her mascara.

You walked to the end of the hall, leaned against the wall, and pulled out your phone. Smiling, you opened the virtual Tamagotchi app and saw your little friend staring back at you, bouncing up and down. The bundle of virtual pixels happily bounced as you fed and bathed it, making you happier in return. Playing this game, you were so entranced with your phone that the abrupt closing of the washroom doors broke you out of your hypnosis fast, causing you to flinch and drop your phone.

You looked up, only to see a brown haired man wearing a long sleeved black shirt. The hem of his sleeve fell, covering his hand as he bent down to pick up your phone. He stood back up, fully facing you now and you immediately recognized who he was. You weren’t a fool, of course you did all your research on the artists of JYPE before applying for the job. Looking down at you right now, holding your phone in his hand, was Bang Chan of Stray Kids.

The wispy tufts of his brown hair bounced over his forehead as he stepped over to you. He smiled, his dimple poking out of his cheek, and handed your phone back to you. “I think you dropped this.”

Blushing tomato red, you embarrassingly accepted the phone, trying not to make your shaking hands noticeable. It seemed like that failed, however, as you noticed him glance at your hands and dimple grow deeper.

“Thank you.” You meekly chirped and lowered your head, still in awe that you somehow bumped into a JYPE idol in the bathroom hallway of a cafeteria.

“It’s good that there’s no cracks.” Bang Chan said, looking in your eyes.

You looked back into his eyes. His smile never left his face, and you physically felt the warmth radiating off his body like rays from the sun. Some boring, objective part of your brain knew this interaction only lasted a fraction of a second, but you swore that time froze.

“Hyung!” A distant voice called.

Your trance was broken as Bang Chan looked over to the person calling his name. He turned back to you, politely bowed, and casually sauntered over to the man who called him.

What just happened? Your inner monologue ran, still trying to process the embarrassing interaction. The scent of his cologne lingered, swirling the atmosphere around your body.

Thankfully, you didn’t have too much time to dwell on this interaction as Na-eun finally opened the washroom doors and was making her way toward you.

You and Na-eun trailed behind the managers until you reached the set of elevators. It was there where you had to unfortunately separate from your comfort work buddy as she hopped in the elevator across from yours with Manager An. The other two managers led you to the elevator at the end and pressed the button for your destination floor. The ride in the elevator was silent. You stood there, fiddling with your nails.

Once the elevator gave the ding of arrival, the three of you headed down a hall where you presumed had the meeting room.

Manager Kim took a look at the watch on his wrist. “We are a minute late, everybody should be there already. Enter silently and respectfully.” He said in a stern voice.

You reached the frosted glass door of the meeting room and entered through the already opened door. The managers followed behind you with Manager Chen being the last one in and closing the door.

Your eyes widened at whom you saw.

There was Bang Chan, who sat in all his glory, staring right into your eyes with his mouth ajar. His shocked expression didn't last long, however, as he quickly composed himself to fit with the professional atmosphere of this room.

But why was he here? You thought. He’s an artist, isn’t this a management meeting?

Your inner monologue was broken by Manager Kim’s stern voice. “Y/n, why don’t you sit with me for today?” He asked with a slight tilt of the lips. His hand was hovering above your back, almost guiding you to the seat just right of the head chair.

Your heart rate quickened. There was no way that you could handle sitting right beside a high position manager on your first day. You barely knew what your duties entailed, you definitely could not handle the pressure of this seat today. You whipped your head around to look for Manager Chen. She was already sitting in her seat, looking like she was right at home.

“Manager Kim, if you don’t mind, I would like to sit in this position for today, '' a voice spoke up, “I have a lot of new ideas I’d like to share that are written in my notes.”

Bang Chan.

He paused a brief second, eyes switching between you and Manager Kim, and raised his iPad to show the screen filled with words.

“I don’t mind at all, go ahead.” Manager Kim monotonously replied. He then made his way to the head chair.

You looked over at Bang Chan, trying to subtly send the most grateful facial expression over to him. He returned your look, slightly grinning as his fingers tapped on the screen of his iPad and sat down to the right of Manager Kim. You looked over to see Manager Chen gesturing you to sit in the chair beside her and swiftly made your way over. At your seat, she handed you a notepad and pen, both adorned with the JYPE logo.

“Now, as of 1:02 p.m., September first, the meeting will officially begin.” Manager Kim clasped his hands together on top of the table. “As most of you already know, we are in the preliminary stages of planning a Chinese debut for our artist group ‘Stray Kids’. All we have right now is the estimated timeline, which is four months. We have a basic grasp of the concept we are working towards, however, as you all know, trends are always changing and growing. While we are working to create a new and original concept for Stray Kids, we also want the concept to gather as much audience reception as possible.”

Wow. That was a lot to take in. Your hands struggled to keep up with writing down what Manager Kim was saying. You knew this relatively new group was really starting to explode in the past year, but a debut in another country? This group must work really hard to even have the company consider a step as risky as this. So this is why Bang Chan is also involved in this meeting.

You peaked your head up from your notepad. Bang Chan sat across from you, one hand on his chin and the other one holding the pen to his tablet.

Manager Kim then carefully discussed the duties that each group in the room would take. Many of the jobs were directly involved with developing the concept itself, such as producing music, concept art, and theme development. Your pen never took a break from gliding on the notepad as you hurriedly jotted down everything that Manager Kim said.

Eventually, Manager Kim’s delegations moved to Manager Chen. “Manager Chen, I’ll let you take over from here.”

“Thank you Manager Kim,” Manager Chen cleared her throat. “While my main job here was to market Korean comebacks towards the Chinese audience, this new project changes things up a bit. Now, not only will I be in charge of marketing to the Chinese audience, but I will also be directly in charge of the concept itself. I will be working carefully with our team in China to monitor the trends which we can incorporate into our debut.

“This is my new assistant, y/n,” She turned and gestured to you. You politely nodded your head. “She will be gathering information on useful trends and reporting back to me, as well as some translating. Please report any ideas that you deem useful to her by the end of every week for her to sort through and deliver to me.”

You almost want to call Manager Chen crazy for giving you so much power, after all, you were only starting out as her assistant. Despite this, however, you were determined to go above and beyond with the new responsibilities given to you, after all, you knew that choosing to work in an organization as big as JYPE would take blood, sweat, and tears.

After some clarifications given by Manager Chen and a few more questions directed at her, Manager Kim took the reins back in his hands.

“Now, as I’m sure you all know, this is Bang Chan: the leader of Stray Kids. Although our management team is in charge of this debut, we like to include the opinions of artists whenever possible. He will make an appearance whenever he can and act as a representative of Stray Kids, sharing their ideas and opinions.” Manager Kim explained.

Bang Chan politely introduced himself, and quickly went on to express some concerns of his members. He made sure that each concern was answered thoroughly by Manager Kim before moving on to the next.

“As for our concept ideas,” Bang Chan’s soft brown eyes met yours, “will I have to report to y/n?”

You felt your ears redden.

“You could, yes,” Manager Kim straightened his back, “but if you find the weekly deadlines too much of a problem, you may just report to me or at any subsequent meeting.”

“No worries sir,” Bang Chan’s eyes lingered on yours for a fraction of a second more before grinning at Manager Kim, “I’m always punctual.”

The rest of the meeting consisted of more introductions and preliminary plans. After about an hour, everybody seemed satisfied with the contents of the meeting and were starting to pack up all their clutter on the table. You looked over at Manager Chen, silently asking what should I do next?

Manager Chen smiled. “Let's head to my floor. I can give you a quick tour, you can get settled at your desk. I have some paperwork that I’m almost done with; I’m sure you’ll have no problem finishing it for me.” She already was standing up and straightening over the creases of her jacket.

You stood up as well and followed behind Manager Chen like a lost baby duckling. You both made your way over to Manager Kim to bid farewell. You politely thanked him, said your goodbyes, and were about to leave when he stopped the two of you.

“Manager Chen, let’s go out for drinks tonight.” Manager Kim took a look at the intricate watch on his wrist. “With our whole team, of course. It’ll be a welcoming night and we can get to know the people on our team better.”

“That’s a great idea, Manager Kim,” Manager Chen nodded at his idea in approval. She turned on her iPad to quickly get a glimpse at her schedule. “What do you think y/n? Can you make it tonight? I know this is very last moment, but I think it’ll be a great opportunity for you to get to know your coworkers better.”

“I should be able to make it.” You definitely could make it. You had no plans anyways.

“Am I invited to this top secret party you’re all having?” A now very distinguishable voice came from behind you. Bang Chan stared at Manager Kim with a very mischievous expression.

“Would your manager allow it?” Manager Kim questioned, knitting his eyebrows.

“I’m on a diet, so I can’t drink alcohol or eat anything,” Bang Chan’s nose scrunched up in annoyance, “but I want to be as involved as I can. Just because I’m an idol doesn’t mean I can’t help behind the scenes as well.”

“Very well,” Manager Kim nodded with a fixed expression, “Let’s all meet at that restaurant about a block away west. I’ll go tell the others.” And with that, Manager Kim left you, Manager Chen, and Bang Chan to stand in awkward silence.

“Well,” Bang Chan cleared his throat and clapped his hands together, “I’ll get going as well to do some work now, but it was nice meeting the both of you.”

“You as well.” Manager Chen replied for the both of you and Bang Chan left soon after.

Manager Chen then led you to the elevators again and you headed up yet another few floors to reach your destination. You nervously fiddled with your hair as you silently waited behind your boss, looking up at the smooth lines of her blazer every few seconds. The elevator doors dinged, letting you know of its arrival. The two of you swiftly headed out the elevators and walked to what you presumed was Manager Chen’s office area. You kept following behind Manager Chen in silence before you stopped in front of a set of doors that looked identical to the ones at the previous meeting room. Manager Chen opened the doors for you, and you headed in.

You paused a step in, looking wide-eyed at the interior. The office was clean. A big glass desk sat right in the middle of the vast room in front of a huge set of windows. There were a couple of soft looking chairs placed right before the desk with a huge rug right underneath it. Over to your left, you spotted a water dispenser with a kettle right beside it. You stared at the room a bit longer before realizing you must have looked very stupid with that astonished look on your face.

“Is this your office, Manager Chen?” You asked.

“Yes. It seems that you like it,” She chuckled. You felt the heat rise to your ears.

“Since you’ll be working so close to me, I’m sure you’ll be happy to come here more often.”

“Thanks.” You awkwardly laughed. You blamed your bad response on the fact that you still weren’t familiar with the language, not your blatant awkwardness.

Manager Chen made her way over to her desk, picking up a small stack of papers. “These are some letters I’ve received from several designer companies in China. Since we are still in the very preliminary stages of this project, we would like to keep our options open for the stylists here.” She picks an annotated letter from the pile. “I’ve translated and created a summary of the main points of this letter. There are a few more left which I believe I can trust you with. Just do as I did with this letter and add the sample pictures along with it.”

You quickly complied, taking the stack of papers from her hands.

“I’ll show you to your new work space.” She led you out of your office and over to a cubicle that wasn’t too far away. It was considerably smaller compared to Manager Chen’s office, but you thought it had a certain coziness to it. Plus, working close to your coworkers could also boost your motivation. “Here is your desk, it’s not the most exciting thing, but you may bring photos or whatnot to decorate it. Now, I’ll let you settle in and get started on your work. You can meet me at my office around six, I can double check your work before we leave.”

You thanked her before she left and immediately got started on your work. You diligently translated the whole of the letters before picking out the main points that matched with Manager Chen’s example. After this was done, you included the photos that came with each letter and slipped them into their own cozy folder. This work was monotonous, sure, but it was something you needed on your hectic first day here.

You were so captivated by your work that you completely forgot about the time. The sun was starting to set, and you only remembered to look at the time after you tucked your last letter neatly in its folder. You briefly panicked, praying that you weren’t making your manager wait. Thankfully, it was only a quarter until six. You took the next fifteen minutes double checking your work, making sure to also check the time every once in a while. At exactly six, you left your desk and scurried over to the big doors of Manager Chen’s office.

Knocking a couple times, you waited patiently to be let in.

“Come in.”

You let yourself in, handing the papers to your manager, then sat quietly in one of the chairs before her desk, crossing your fingers together. You fiddled with your thumbs, patiently waiting for Manager Chen to speak up.

“Not bad, this is some decent work.” Manager Chen announced as soon as she finished glossing over your work. “I’ve noted some places that you can either fix or improve. I’ll scan them and hand you a copy tomorrow.”

You let out a breath that you didn’t know you were holding. A tidal wave of relief washed over you as you let yourself relax further into your chain. Not bad, this is some decent work. You proudly repeated this moment in your brain. Although you were disappointed with the mistakes that you let slip through, to get somewhat of a compliment on your first day meant a lot to you.

“Shall we get going now?” Manager Chen asked.

You grabbed your bag and stood up. “I’ll let you lead the way.”

_______

It seemed like all you were doing on your first day was following Manager Chen around like a lost puppy. The situation right now was no exception either, as you tried to copy her confident strides over to the restaurant a block down. You watched the busy rush hour streets and sidewalks fill with people, some people going home after a long day, some people going to party just like you.

Soon, after a few more minutes of walking, the both of you arrived at the small wooden doors of the restaurants. It seemed like the both of you were a bit late as Manager Kim was already waiting in front of the entrance with the rest of the team. Bang Chan was also there, head down looking at his phone.

“Sorry we’re late, have you been waiting for long?” Manager Chen somehow sounded confident despite making everybody wait on her.

Her voice seemed to have caught everybody’s attention. You watched as Bang Chan swiftly turned his head up from his phone, his eyes making contact with yours. You immediately focused your eyes somewhere else, trying to casually play off the fact that your eyes subconsciously drifted to him.

“We’ve only been waiting for a couple minutes.” Manager Kim gave a tight smile. “Let’s go in before you all get too cold.”

Your little group of around ten people slowly entered the doors, filling the restaurant. Manager Kim called over a waitress, signaling that you had ten people in your group, and let the waitress lead you all to a long wooden table.

The restaurant was nice, nothing too fancy, but that’s how you could tell the food was good. With dim lighting and tightly packed tables, it made you feel fuzzy and warm on the inside.

However, your thoughts on the restaurant were soon broken by a hand on your shoulder.

“Y/n, why don’t you sit with me?” Manager Kim’s lips curled up, “After all, this is a work gathering, how good of a boss would I be if I didn’t even treat my newest team member to a drink?”

Your brain was in shambles. You seriously didn’t feel comfortable sitting with him all night. However, the logical side of your brain was saying something different. He’s just being nice as a boss. You don’t know how people in this country act anyways, stop being paranoid.

It seemed like your inner turmoil was taking longer than necessary, as you heard another familiar voice speak up.

“Manager Kim-” Bang Chan called out.

“You don’t need to sit with me here, Bang Chan.” Manager Kim chuckled as he stared directly in Bang Chan’s eyes. “I’d rather not talk about work outside the office.”

You watched as Bang Chan’s eyebrows furrowed, looking back to you in reluctance. You smiled at him before turning your attention to Manager Kim. It was just one night, right? Plus, there’s no harm in establishing a good impression with your boss.

“I’ll sit with you, Manager Kim.” You smiled, “thanks for offering.”

And so, you took your seat next to Manager Kim at the table. Bang Chan, who was to your left, looked askance at Manager Kim for a brief second before his facial expression did a complete 180. His familiar, boy-ish smile was plastered on his face like it was the most natural thing.

When the menus came, everybody at the table — including you — started to order onslaughts of food and alcohol. After brief moments of casual chatter about topics such as the weather or how good the food was here, everything that was ordered arrived at your table.

You grabbed a can of beer and started sipping on it. You’ve drank before — of course — with your old friends at university, but it’s been at least a year since you last did. Better ease myself in. You thought.

However, your preconceived plans were ruined when a small glass of clear liquor got pushed in front of you.

“Y/n, surely you aren’t going to sip on that can all night.” The ends of Manager Kim’s lips curled up.

“Wasn’t planning to, sir.” You replied while tipping the glass up and into your mouth. The bitter liquid burned your throat as it went down. You took a moment to recollect your surroundings. Seems like your tolerance was higher than you thought.

“Bang Chan, do you not drink? Why not eat something then?” Manager Chen pointed to the food on the table.

“No can do ma’am, I’m on a strict diet. My manager would kill me.” Bang Chan pointed to his glass of water.

“In that case,” Manager Chen filled another glass, “Y/n, have another drink.” She slid the glass down the table in front of you.

You gladly accepted your second drink, downing the alcohol in one go. Your eyes instinctively squeezed together as you felt your throat burn. From the tips of your ears to the ends of your toes, your whole body felt warm and alive.

You lost track of the time. As your conversations got livelier, your head got fuzzier. You stopped counting your drinks after four, especially since so many people were eager to offer the new employee a drink. Although your vision was starting to blur, you could still think straight. I can still think, you thought to yourself, still — what a powerful buzz.

Your thoughts ran rampant in your mind as you stared at the lightbulb across the room. What a pretty light. So bright. Warm.

“Y/n.”

Was the light calling your name?

“Y/n!”

Your eyes focused again and snapped away from the lightbulb. Where was the voice coming from? You slowly turned your head. Bang Chan.

“Hi.” You smiled.

“Hi.” He smiled back. So bright. Warm. “It’s been hours and I haven’t even offered you a drink yet.”

You tried to focus your eyes on his face as he slid the glass over to you. One more drink wouldn’t hurt your buzz, right?

You gladly accepted, slowly moving your hand over to the glass to pick the clear liquid up. It went down in one go just like all the others.

Huh? Was this water?

You struggled to focus your eyes on the person who offered you the drink. “That was yummy.”

“I bet it was,” the talking blur chuckled, “How about another one?”

You nodded, then took the glass he slid towards you. It’s funny how water flows even when in a cup. Water. You needed to pee.

“Hey,” your words dragged out, “where’s uh, where’s the washroom?”

“Follow me. I’ll show you.” Manager Kim stood up and reached his hand out towards you. You didn’t want to take it, but it seemed like nobody was noticing his offer.

Reluctantly, you took his hand and stood up, only to stumble down again. Did your knees not want to listen?

“Whoa there, better hold on.” Manager Kim said.

“No, I can walk. I-I can walk.” You let go of Manager Kim and tried to focus all your brainpower on moving your feet in a straight line. This tactic only worked for a second, however, as your knees gave in and you stumbled down.

“It’s obvious that you can’t.” Manager Kim’s lips turned up. “It’s time for you to go home. I’ll take you back.”

What? No. You didn’t want Manager Kim to take you home, not after all the awkward events of today and the general vibe from him. You tried to express your thoughts, but nothing came out of your mouth.

“Manager Kim, you’ve been drinking!” Bang Chan’s voice came from some part of the room. “It’s not safe to drive, I’ll call a taxi for you.”

“What about Y/n here? I’ll get a taxi for us both.” Manager Kim said.

“I called my manager earlier to pick me up, we can drop her off along the way. It’s not a good idea to put two drunk people in a car. I’m completely sober right now, so let me do all the work.” Bang Chan grinned, patting Manager Kim on his shoulder.

“Is that what you want, Y/n?” Manager Kim glared.

You dizzily nodded.

“Alright. In that case, I can call my own taxi later.” Manager Kim grimaced.

“Stay safe, Manager Kim.” Bang Chan smiled. He turned to you. “My manager’s been waiting outside for a while now, do you want to leave now?”

You nodded. You tried to start walking again, but your damn knees just wouldn’t listen.

“Do you want to hold on to me?” Bang Chan knitted his brows together and held out an arm.

“I,” you slurred, “can walk.” You tried to start your feet again, only to end up stumbling down.

“I know you can,” Bang Chan said as he reached his hands out to stabilize you, “but — ah — I’m really tired after today. Can you hold on to my arm so I won’t fall out of exhaustion?”

You agreed to help him. Bang Chan waved to everybody still at the table before leading the two of you out to a black SUV. He allowed you to stumble your way in the back seats first before sliding in himself. He asked you for your address, which took many tries for you to accurately type it into his phone.

You leaned your head against the window, staring at passing blurred lights as Bang Chan’s manager started driving. Just being away from the loud and bright environment seemed to have cleared your head a little, but the pounding would not stop. You cursed yourself for being so irresponsible on your first day, especially because you were still alone in this new country.

“Hey,” you felt a gentle tap on your shoulder, “want some water?” You looked over to see Bang Chan holding out a plastic bottle with the lid screwed off.

You languidly reached your hand out for the bottle and gulped down as much water as you could in one breath before handing it back to him. The street lights started getting blurrier as you tried to fight exhaustion, the muscles in your eyelids starting to get more and more uncontrollable.

“Y/n.”

“Hmm?”

“Don’t fall asleep yet, we’re almost there. Ten more minutes.”

You couldn’t hear anything after that, however, as you felt your eyes give up on you and your body fall into a deep sleep.

“Y/n… Y/n.” A familiar voice called.

You fluttered your eyes open, your head pounding. Not knowing where you were, you surveyed your surroundings in a panic. It seemed as though you were in the back of a car… Parked outside of your apartment building?

“Hey, you’re finally awake.” Bang Chan’s voice entered your ear. It all came rushing back to you; the restaurant, the drinking, entering the SUV.

“How long have we been parked here?” Your groggy voice sounded inhuman. You had to clear your throat a couple times.

“It’s only been twenty or so minutes. I’m not allowed to leave the car, are you able to get home alone? I can ask my manager to go with you.” Bang Chan scratched the back of his neck.

“I should be fine.” You mumbled, a bit embarrassed to have fallen asleep in the car of a person you just met that day. This wasn’t even his car, it was his manager’s.

“Hey… can I put my number in your phone?” Bang Chan avoided your eyes. “Just so you can tell me when you get home.” He quickly added.

“Okay.” You awkwardly handed him your phone with your contacts already opened. He quickly typed his phone number in before handing it back to you.

“Text me when you get home. Remember to lock your door, okay?”

You thank both him and his manager before hurrying back to your apartment. Your head was still pounding unrelentlessly as you pressed the elevator button for your floor. The events of today were still unprocessed in your brain. You met a potential friend, which was a highlight. However, you also met two higher up managers and an actual idol, only to get hilariously drunk in the presence of. At least it’ll make a good story to tell my mom. You thought.

In no time, you made it in your apartment and locked the door behind you, remembering what Bang Chan told you in the car. You texted the new number in your phone.

Y/n: Hi. It’s y/n. I just entered my apartment.

Not even a minute later, your phone lit up, signaling a new text message.

Bang Chan: great!! remember to lock the doooor hahaha ( ◕ω◕✿ )

You subconsciously grin at your phone. Cute. Throwing your phone haphazardly on your bed, you begrudgingly began your night routine. After washing up and throwing on a random shirt from your closet, you fell on your bed ready to sleep. You were about to close your eyes when your phone lit up again with a ding. It was another text.

Bang Chan: Hey… Just so you know, if you ever feel unsafe around the office just tell me okay? I’ll always try to help you in whatever way I can.

#stray kids #stray kids scenarios #stray kids imagines #stray kids x reader #stray kids smut #stray kids fluff #stray kids angst #stray kids fanfic #skz scenarios #skz imagines #bang chan #bang chan scenarios #bang chan imagines #bang chan fluff #bang chan angst #bang chan smut

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mythiccheroacademia · 4 years

Text

A/N: Thank you hottie❤️ Tumblr was fucking with the format, so I had to repost. Anyways, I looovveee this request. I’ve been waiting to be in the right mood to write this. Like, jealous muscular himbos completely head over heels for their s/o? Sign me up.

Sorry for the wait. I hope you enjoy this, sugar plum

All characters are 18+

Warnings: smut below the line!

Katsuki Bakugo:

SFW

bakugo doesnt get jealous

he usually felt secure in your relationship

yeah he got annoyed when kaminari would jokingly flirt with you

and yes, it made him angry when the dekusquad would literally stare at you with puppy dog eyes

and it pissed him off when kirishima suddenly became the funniest guy in the room when you were around

but he wasn’t jealous

how could he be? he’s bakugo katsuki

you agreed to go out with him. the strongest. the best. you couldn't get any better than him

right?

lmao no

the bigger the ego, the more fragile it was

bakugo doesnt handle jealousy well

there’s a small part of him that knows he can be an asshole

he’s not the most...affectionate person

but damn it, if he doesnt try his hardest for you

you notice that he gets quieter but his actions become a lot more aggressive

he’s glaring at anyone that smiles at you

it’s honestly scarier than his threats

forces you to hold hands

is suddenly into PDA??? when he kissed you in front of your friends you literally made a face

you didn't know what was up with him, but you were really confused when you told him to chill and he visibility wilted

once he came around to telling you that he wouldn't hold it against you if you wanted to leave him, you were quick to reassure him

give him a couple kisses and rub his ego just a tad, and he’ll be back to normal

acts like he didn't just look like he was about to cry two seconds ago

NSFW

there are two things that happen when bakugo gets jealous

at first, he’s very rough and handsy

he likes to talk big and say things like

“imma fuck you up when we get home”

“you like when daddy does that, sweetheart?”

“kiss it right there, baby”

“youre mine. tell me your mine”

he’s doing everything he can to get you screaming and thrashing

he’ll go down on you for hours, leave you trembling, only to tell you that was a warm-up

there’s this dark look in his eyes when he’s pounding into you, gripping the headboard so he can angle himself in the best position possible

it’s like he’s trying to prove himself by wrecking you

in the midst of your fucking, just when you feel like youre about to pass out, bakugo’s head falls on your shoulder

he’s still thrusting into you, but it gets slower and deeper

needier

now it’s not just fucking

looks into your eyes with the most adoring gaze and kisses the breath of out you

he can’t speak, too deep into your lovemaking to express how much he loves you

how he’s so scared of losing you

but you don’t need his words to understand

lock your legs around his hips and tell him how you’ll always be his and he will let out a moan that makes your toes curl

when you reach your high, it’s a vulnerable moment

lots of soft kisses and hugging

wont admit to the tears that sting his eyes but is willing to express his adornment for you through his embrace and aftercare

Todoroki Shouto:

SFW

todoroki doesnt have a lot of experience with jealousy

he knows what anger is

he’s felt insecurity

and he knows what it feels like to long for something or someone

but envy was a foreign concept to him

that was until he got into his first romantic relationship with you

don't get him wrong, he trusted you with everything

you gave him no reason to question your loyalty

and it never occurred to him that you would leave him for someone else because of how strong your love was for one another

however, his insecurities always got the best of him

he had a lot of baggage

he knew that

and when someone would approach you, someone that looked free-spirited and independent, he’d wonder if he was holding you back

even then, he can’t help but think that no one is worth the ground you walked on

not even himself sometimes

he never brings it up

but you notice that he started touching his scar a lot more

todoroki would try to act more extroverted thinking it would be better if he was livelier

youre deep talks about family matter diminished little by little

he tried to fill your comfortable silence with awkward conversation

you were so confused why your bf was acting so different

it took a couple attempts to get him to spill his thoughts

once he did, he’s stark quiet, looking away, fearing that you’d be so disappointed in him

but you just take his face in your hands and tell him

“you’re my whole world shouto. why would i ever give that up?”

he holds you in his arms for a long time after that

NSFW

behind his jealousy of onlooking eyes is a deep steed of low self-esteem

and you can feel it when you get intimate

he’s always looking to please you, but now he’s desperate, trying so hard to think of what will make you feel good

it makes you sad bc he already knows the answer to those questions

but he overthinks it

he’s noticeably shier

his touches are hesitant as he second-guesses himself

is continuously asking if you’re okay or if he’s doing it right

at one point, you have to take charge and push him down on the bed

“let me show you how much i want you. just you”

licks his lips as you kiss down his body

one of those guys that believes sucking his dick is a chore 💀

“you don't have to do that” face ass

so when you suck the soul out of him, he’s SPRUNG

would write a song about it if he could LMAO

quickly says he loves you before kissing you like the world depends on it as you ride him

twirl your hips in the way he likes and he’ll hiss out curses

run your hands through his hair and kiss his scar and he’ll give you such pretty moans

please tell him how beautiful he is and how much you love him

my mans will nut on the spot

after the first round, he regains his confidence and flips you on your hands and knees

before you even know what’s going on, he’s pounding into you, gripping your hips like a lifeline

now that he’s reminded that he’s your man, he spends the night realigning your spine

bc who could do it better?

Togata Mirio:

SFW

mirio is one of the most confident people ever

not only is he secure in himself, but he’s secure in your relationship

he knows he bagged a baddie

ofc people would be all over you

he couldn't blame them! i mean, look at you!

when people approached you, he usually let you handle it

if they were persistent, he would just put an arm around your waist

“you’ve got good taste, but they’re taken! sorry!”

it’s so wholesome that the other person can’t even find it within themselves to be upset

there was only one time he recalled getting genuinely jealous

it was during the time you two weren't exclusively dating

just going on dates to see how things went

at the same time, he overheard from your friend that your ex was trying to get back with you

when he heard that, he started sweating

it wasn't jealousy, but more like fear

he was determined not to lose you

not when things were going so well

mirio literally goes above and beyond on your dates

mans deadass learns how to cook all your favorite foods to bring to you

youre crying bc the seasoning was just *chef’s kiss*

brings you flowers at random times of the day

sends you pictures of things that remind him of you

you’re just soaking up all the attention

he’s always been an extra person so you didn't think much of it

it wasn't until you two were cuddling and watching a movie in his apartment that he confesses to you

“i know that i’m competing against history between you and your ex, but i want you to know that my feelings for you are strong, y/n. and i’ll do everything to prove to you that i can be the man of your dreams”

you stare at him before bringing him in for a kiss

“there’s a reason my ex is my ex”

“but--”

“just ask me to be yours already, mirio”

he didnt have to be told twice

NSFW

it was actually that same night that cuddling turned into something a little nastier

honestly, from then on, if you cuddled for more than 20min, there was a 99% chance yall end up fucking lmao

but that night, when he was kissing your neck and grinding his dick against you, he noticed your phone light up on the nightstand

you were too caught up in his fingers between your legs but he saw the text from your ex

it read: “i know this might be out of the blue, but would you wanna catch up over dinner sometime?”

now, mirio wasn't one to be spiteful

but he couldn't help but get a little heated

knowing your ex was trying to get back with you was way different than seeing it

a tiny switch goes off in his head and now he’s ready to make it known that you and him are together

you’re in heaven as mirio’s lips suck and nip at your neck and body

his head game is immaculate

turns you on your stomach so he can massage your back and ass before sliding into you

mirio holds your neck and gives you sloppy kisses as his hips swim into you

your phone lights up again and you can barely think straight when he gets rougher

starts pounding into you like he’s tryna put a baby in you whether it’s possible or not 💀

youre grabbing for anything you can hold as he starts whispering sweet nothings about how he’s gonna take care of you

whew...what a man yall 🥴

the entire time he’s wearing a shit-eating grin

bc he knows he won

might have accidentally sent your ex a voice recording of you moaning his name

oops

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