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#I would love to write more. I wish I felt inspired right now. About anything really. I hope I will again sooner rather than later
holybibly · 3 months
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IT'S YOU |Woosan x reader| Part II
Part I If you haven't read it
Genre: smut, from friends to lovers!au, college!au
Word Count: 9.4k
Summary: Sometimes drunken decisions lead to the most unexpected results and the most shocking confessions. Or, after your boyfriend cheats on you, you propose a threesome to your best friends and it might just be what they have always wanted.
WARNING: only!18+ unprotected sex, Dom!San, Dom!Wooyoung, Sub!Reader, fingering, choking, degrading, pet names, spit kink, manhandling, threesomes, dirty talk, explicit sexual content, explicit language, squirting, pussy slapping, overstimulation and more.
Tag list: @staytiny816 @woosmaid @jiminssluttyminx @liknws @pearltinyy @haebaragisworld @bts-iris @bleachpolaroid @wisejudgedragonhairdo @ginger-coffee-addict @pricessthings @rockstarsanie @lilmackiee @minaizum1 @shotahime @vixensss @meljoongiee @ivsjake4evr @love-me-a-little @seonghwaddict @onmykneesforateez @meeitany
A/N: Okay, we're here. I couldn't be more excited. Really, they've got a lot going on and I hope you're all ready because it's gonna be intense, hot and messy. Seriously, I really appreciate everyone's feedback and consideration for this series. It's become one of the most popular things I've written, but it put some pressure on me, because I'm worrying about whether the second part would please you. Well, I think we'll see.
Enjoy the chapter, even though it's practically nothing but smut.
The third and final part! takes us back to where it all began, but not without an emotional roller coaster ride. By the way, I wanted to point out that T/N doesn't remember what she promised them a year ago. So don't be surprised by the plot changes in this issue. In the finale, we're sure to get a hot threesome.
I'm still learning how to write smut, so please be gentle with me.
Besides, I can't help but talk about the results of the poll. The majority vote was for Alpha/Beta/Omega!au, and honestly, it's one of the ideas I'm most excited about, and I was hoping it would be the winner. I look forward to your comments. In general, feel free to write me about anything.
dividers by @cafekitsune
Much love, everyone.
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Now. The morning after graduation.
It's a late, lazy morning when you wake from a deep and well-earned sleep. You blinked slowly, trying to adjust to the bright golden light flooding the room, which refracted through your bedroom's stained glass. It was beautiful and annoying at the same time, just as Hongjoong himself, who had inspired you to do this.
You should have shaded the windows last night before you went to sleep, but that was the last thing you thought of as lying in bed between the restless, wet San's and Wooyoung's bodies. You were more preoccupied with the touch of their rough hands on your heated body, the warmth of their breath on tender skin, and the sounds of their hoarse moaning right by your ear.
They were an absolute mess, slowly driving you crazy. Emotions raged in your stomach, making you feel guilty, embarrassed and… lustful. You practically dozed off at dawn, when the boys managed to calm down a bit and fall into a deep sleep.
The apartment is incredibly quiet; you can't hear a single sound, and only the soft sniffle on your neck, with the feeling of warm breath dancing across your bare skin, breaks this peaceful silence.
Wooyoung is still fast asleep, clutching you in his arms like a favorite teddy bear, his leg wrapped possessively around your thigh as it always has been. Even when he was asleep, he couldn't bring himself to let you go for a second.
You ran the palm of your hand over the sheet and felt nothing but the cold under your fingers. Sannie has been awake for a while now, and for a moment you're annoyed by this fact. You wish that he was still in bed with you, soft and gentle as he always was. So that the three of you could spend this special morning together. The graduation robes are scattered all over the room in a mess of things, and all you want to do is push them further and further into the wardrobe and forget about them forever. The dog days are finally over. You are now official free.
Sensual, full lips touch the sensitive spot on your neck, and the sensation sends shivers down your spine. The throat is suddenly dry, sweat begins to form on your neck from the abruptly increase in desire, and you close your eyes tightly, aware of every touch and breath coming from Wooyoung more clearly than before. It's as if your whole body is completely focused on him, reacting to every fleeting movement and every sound with even more eager devotion.
You're still too receptive from last night, and you need more space to try and keep all those dirty, depraved thoughts from taking over and you. You studiously ignore the slight shiver of excitement that is happily tickling your breasts and causing the muscles in your lower abdomen to ripple in a pleasant way. You bite your lip to keep yourself from groaning in frustration as the images and sensations of the night flash in front of your eyes. You need to stop right now. It's too bad, but it's too sweet.
You start to wriggle, trying to get away from Wooyoung, who is still sleeping, but he just pulls you closer to his chest, as if he wants to dissolve into your body completely, and you melt.
Wooyoung has always been so insatiable and greedy for any kind of physical contact that you can offer him, like an adorable little puppy, that you can just wag your finger at him and he'll come running to you. He always had "too much space between you"; it was important to him to hold you constantly, to touch soft skin with his fingertips, to leave butterfly kisses in every possible place, to knead your thighs and squeeze waist possessively, to pull you so close that there wasn't a centimetre between you. You were his darling, soft and sweet girl in all the right places, and he just couldn't help himself.
San used to tell him that he was being a bit greedy and that he needed to learn how to share you with others. After all, sharing meant caring, and you were also his chagi.
Yes, you wanted to be taken care of, and that frightened you to the depths of your most forbidden fantasies. You wanted to be nervous about them; you wanted them to use you as they pleased, to make you take everything they had to offer, even if it destroyed you completely.
Your desire for them was more than you should have as friends. And that feeling had only grown stronger over the past year.
But despite Wooyoung's obsession and possessiveness, his touch always soothed you. He gave you the comfort you needed whenever you felt the need. And in the end, his hands would always nudge you in the direction of San, so that he could have his own moment of sharing with you. You were their own personal cuddly toy, and that was fine with you, because there was no place in the world where you could feel more protected and cuddly than in their arms.
But at the moment, you wanted nothing more than to get away from his touch and calm down your excitement. You'd been so needy since last night, and Wooyoung had only added to your frustration.
He's shirtless, his skin warm and smooth, and you can be sure it's golden like caramel where the sun has licked it. Delicious. You can almost taste him on the tip of your tongue, and suddenly you're tempted to sink your teeth into him for a taste, but you just bite down harder on your lower lip and stifle a moan.
You need to stop being so intensely... aware of him.
Maybe you were still drunk from the last night; after all, you couldn't remember exactly how many shots of tequila you'd consumed before dragging Yunho into the ladies' room to start kissing passionately. And you found yourself in an even more suggestive position with Seonghwa after another round of colourful, unnamed cocktails.
From then on, every innocent act made you feel lustful and hungry for intimacy.
Was it karma or something? You weren't sure, but you were more inclined to think that it was the lack of passionate sex you hadn't been having for a year now. You hadn't been able to find anyone suitable for a long-term relationship after you'd broken up with Suho, and boys-toys hadn't given you any pleasure.
You wanted more than ten minutes of gasping under the covers with awkward fingers poking into the pussy. They were cum faster than you were able to get yourself aroused. Pathetic.
You needed to satisfy that hunger that was eating you from the inside out, that oppressive feeling of emptiness inside you that could only be filled by a big dick that you could choke on for the rest of your life. A thick and long one, with visibly bulging veins, that could really hit all the sensitive places inside you, causing you to have orgasm after orgasm. And having not one but two perfectly matched options handy hasn't made things any easier.
If you offered to suck them off, Wooyoung's dick would be in your mouth in no time. He was always a fireball, passionate, and impatient, and San…San liked to play with his food before getting down to business. You were in awe of how perfect their dynamic was with such different personalities.
You wanted to see how attractive they would be when a warm throat closed around their cocks, when their beautiful faces were contorted with intense pleasure, and when you heard them moan out your name.
Damn it.
It's moments like these that make you realize that moving in with Wooyoung and San was the best and worst decision you ever made. Unless you count buying a pair of designer jeans that make your butt a magnet for people's hands.
The time went by far too quickly for your liking. It was easy to get lost in the succession of school days, week after week, punctuated by movie nights, spontaneous outings and a seemingly endless stream of student parties. Everything in your life changes. From the big renovation of your apartment, which was Hongjoong's job - he was still over the loss of his favourite vintage sofa - to the move in of San and Wooyoung. Things started to move at an even faster pace the day the boys dragged their suitcases into the dark space of your ultra-modern living room, to a general "You should have done this a long time ago".
It was a spontaneous and hasty decision. But what could have gone wrong? It's always been the three of you, and you had no idea that sharing space would have any effect on your relationship. God, how wrong you were. They played cat and mouse with you, testing your mettle and your patience. The memory of that moment is still so vivid in your mind.
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"Come on, chagi, try it; it's quite tasty." San brought a spoonful of the dark green liquid, which Wooyoung proudly called the best hangover soup in the world, to your lips.
Jung Wooyoung and his ego, of course.
"Go ahead, baby; be good and open your mouth. It'll make you feel good, I  promise." That last sentence was full of innuendo, and it didn't take a genius to see it. In fact, everything that came out of Wooyoung's mouth was absolute filth.
He was practically purring in your ear, touching your delicate skin with every word, and you swear you could feel the touch of his tongue on your earlobe. Oh, fuck. His hands slid down your shoulders, deftly kneading the muscles that had gone stiff, his thumbs sliding up the vertebrae of your neck, and he dug a little bit into the hair at the back of your neck. In that moment, you were ready to do anything for him, whatever he asked.
"That's my Chagia, so docile and sweet." San would continue to feed you slowly with a spoon, smiling sweetly at you as if it were the most pleasant thing in the world to do. From time to time, he would wipe away the drops of liquid that ran down your lips with his thumb, as if in a romantic drama. You were perfectly capable of doing it yourself. But San's meaningful raised eyebrow made it clear that it was better to let him take care of you without resistance. San's language of love had always been to serve, and he took every opportunity to remind you of that.
The silence around you was nice and cozy—you'd even say relaxing—especially since you could still feel the humming bass of last night's music in your head. And all in all, you weren't feeling your best. Hell, that shit you drank last night was strong. This went on for a few more minutes until the plate in front of you was empty and Woo's face was pressed against your cheek in a cute puppy way. 
"Woo, and I wanted to talk to you about something, Y/N," San began, his voice suddenly becoming so sweet. He took your hand gently, his thumb stroking your knuckles lazily. He obviously wanted something from you.
"Sure, I'm all ears."
"We'd like to move in with you, peach, what do you think?" Wooyoung was pecking at your cheek, acting like a real sweetheart, but you knew every one of his tactics to get what he wanted.
"You're not going to get it if Woo keeps licking my cheek."
"But, Peach…" He whined, pursing his puffy lips in a resentful manner. Okay, he was cute as hell, but you were never going to tell him that.
"Chagi." You turned your attention back to San, who looked like he was confessing his love to you: Are this hearts in his eyes? Or are you still drunk?
"Agreed, we are practically living here anyway; I even have my own toothbrush in the bathroom. It's just a formality." He was awfully proud of it, squaring his shoulders and imagining himself under your gaze.
"We want to take care of you, baby."
And this is where you should have told them to fuck off and forget the way to your apartment, change the locks, and give San his toothbrush back. But whether it was the soft and somehow loving look of San's cat eyes paired with deep, sweet dimples or Wooyoung's gentle hands that started to knead your shoulders again in a languidly seductive way, you nodded affirmatively.
They were right; you were all practically living together. The amount of their stuff in your flat was unreal—the T-shirts you slept in, the perfume bottles left everywhere, study notes, games, pajamas and scarves, Wooyoung's luxurious leather jackets, and San's books—you could start a collection, but their stuff was just as much yours. It was also the constant cause of your and Suho's fights; he was always jealous of you and them, completely unaware of the dynamic between the three of you. They'd been glued to your thigh for years, and the fact that you had a boyfriend wouldn't change that. Narrow-minded prick.
"I think you're right. Let's give it a go."
"My little darling." San gave a dazzling smile, showing off his dimples even more, and pressed your hand to his lips. God, Choi San was a real menace. It was hard to believe that this pretty cat in front of you was none other than the one who was caught many times having rough sex in the middle of the university library. Once, he was even caught in a threesome, but you didn't want to point the finger at Wooyoung for putting him up to it.
"Yeah, that's our girl." Wooyoung pressed his lips to your cheek once more, salivating as much as he could along the way.
"Jung Wooyoung!" You squealed, wiping the drool from your cheek in disgust, but Woo was already happily scurrying into the living room, laughing loudly.
"We'll look after you, chagi."
That was San's last sentence before he ran his tongue over your hand, licked his fingers like a cat, and ran after Woo with an evil giggle.
"Choi San, come back at once!"
You are going to have so much fun here. Too much fun for your own good.
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"Mmm… Peach, you are already awake." The soft touch of plump lips on your shoulder means that Wooyoung has woken up and wants to have your full attention.
"It has been some time. But I don't want to go anywhere. How are you feeling? Last night, when we came home, you and San were really drunk.
Wooyoung hugs you even tighter, nestling his face between your shoulder blades and taking a deep breath of your scent. Your skin is tickled by the tips of his long hair. A light touch on your lower back sends a jolt up your spine, making you arch slightly in his arms. Wooyoung is always like this; his defiant and needy attitude shouldn't be anything unusual for you, so you should stop reacting to him like this.
"Thank you for looking after us, peach. You're always so nice. Sannie and I don't deserve you." He kisses your neck. This time the touch lingers a little longer, and a feeling of excitement rises in your chest. "We haven't caused you any trouble, have we, little girl?" He purrs as he rubs his nose up against your shoulder. You couldn't help but notice how San's habits have become Wooyoung's habits, and vice versa. Now you have to put up with all that twin feline energy.
You turn to face him, and even after a night of sleeping with his hair tousled and without his usual cheeky grin, Wooyoung still looks pretty damn good. He's comfortable, a little sleepy, but no less seductive than he ever was. Woo has always had this sensual aura about him. Underneath the overt sexuality and the bitchy attitude, there was something else—something dark and seductive. You want to kiss him right now, so badly. Your hand runs through his silky hair, letting it fall in soft waves on either side of his face. Dark strands that are long enough to be pulled through easily. The world's handsomest boy.
It's all too easy to fall in love with him.
He kisses your palm playfully and pokes his nose into it like a cat hungry for affection, and you don't mind his purring with pleasure.
You wonder what he's going to sound like when he cums, God, you need to help yourself.
"Let me think." You run your fingers through his hair, lightly massaging his scalp. It's a deceptively gentle gesture before you pull hard on the roots of his hair, causing him to cry out in surprise.
"Oh, babe, why?" He purses his lips in offense, hoping you'll fall for his cute look. But you've known Wooyoung for years, and judging by the mischievous gleam in his eyes, he knew exactly what he was getting at.
"Firstly, you robbed me of my chance for great sex with your whining and dragging me home. Secondly, you behaved horribly when I tried to persuade you to take a shower and you kept me awake until the morning by clinging to me and fidgeting on the bed. Today I demand the royal treatment because you really messed up last night. This was not part of my plan for the prom at all."
Woo smiles back wickedly, practically baring his teeth in a wolfish grin.
"Peaches, are you really such a needy girl? Well, what are we going to do about it? San and I will have to do our best to make it up to you." He suddenly turns you over so that you are lying on your back, sandwiched between the mattress and his lithe body. Wooyoung is hovering over you, his hair falling all over your face, and you can't help but notice how sexy he looks in this position, which is annoying the hell out of you. He doesn't even have to try very hard to send you over the edge.
Strong hands are resting on the sides of your head, letting you enjoy the sight of the seductively bulging veins that run down his forearms. Fuck, you've always had a weakness for his hands, and who wouldn't when they look like this? Woo leans his head towards you until your noses touch, like a predator cornering his prey.
"Baby, I have my doubts that you'll be satisfied with anyone, so don't sulk. And you know Sannie and I will have to approve of someone running their fingers down your knickers." He smiles broadly at you, clearly enjoying your annoyance when you roll your eyes at him.
"Jung Wooyoung, stop it!" Your hand leaves an angry red mark on the bare skin of his chest, and he grunts. It will take all the patience in the world not to beat him to death or kiss him. "I swear I'll wash your mouth out with soap someday." Or maybe you'll lick him from the inside out. "And stop sticking your pretty little nose where you shouldn't. You don't have to worry about who I'm gonna fuck."
"So what if it bothers me? What are you going to do with it, Peach?" He bites his lips in anticipation and raises an eyebrow in expectation, as if he were challenging you to go on.
The way that smug look is on his face makes you feel a little pissed off. You get a little cocky and decide to use the same tactic he did. Wrapping your hands around his face, you're pulling him even closer, resting him on your forearms and your lips nearly touch. He has siren eyes that are deep and mesmerising, and the intensity of his gaze causes your cheeks to flush and you to bite down on your lower lip. The gleam in his fox eyes is proof that he is enjoying every second of your little game.
"Seonghwa kisses you like he's fucking your mouth with his tongue, it's fucking heaven and you can do whatever you want with that fact, baby. I would have ridden him like a stallion in front of everyone last night if it wasn't for you and San's drunken arses". You push him off of you, and Wooyoung rolls over to the other side of the bed as you sit up.
There's something in the air, and you feel you've said something wrong, judging by the way Wooyoung's eyes are flashing with an emotion you can't quite describe. It's a weird mix between anger, envy, desire and something else. But whatever it is, it is making your pussy clench in anticipation of it.
Damn, when did you start thinking with what's between your legs instead of your brain?
He stares at you intently, as if he's trying to decide whether he's going to scold you or fuck you senseless. As lust flashes through his languid onyx eyes like a shooting star, fast but unmistakable, and his pink tongue flicks out to wet his swollen lips, Wooyoung knows exactly what he's going to do to you.
You reach out to stroke his shoulder, and just as you expected, his skin is the most delicious shade of caramel. You can't help but want to run your tongue all over it.
Oh, shit. Now would be a good time to remind yourself: He's your best friend.
"Where`s San?" He asks you.
The expression on his face is, for the most part, neutral, with just a slight hint of lust and anticipation. He slowly licks his delicious lips and looks at you with bedroom eyes. You feel the warm moisture building up between your thighs. If he keeps looking at you like that, you're going to make a puddle of lust where you're sitting right now. You squeeze your thighs tighter to keep the liquid from dripping shamefully onto the bed, praying to all the gods that Wooyoung won't notice.
"I don't know. He wasn't in the bed when I woke up."
"Good."
What the hell is 'GOOD'? You need to collect your thoughts and leave this stuffy room, but the way Wooyoung's eyes slide over your body before, and slowly sucking his lower lip tells you there's nowhere to run. 
"Come to me, sweetheart; I want you in my arms." He is stroking himself on his thigh, the silk fabric of his pajamas leaving no room for imagination as it outlines the taut muscles of his gorgeous thighs. His legs are spread a little wider to draw your attention to where he wants you now, and you can clearly see the imprint of his thick dick through the fabric. Damn. It's completely hard, and you can't help but notice how big it is.
His actions send signals straight to the nerves that control your cunt. The wet heat is running between your legs and your arousal is increasing. A palpable shiver runs through all body as you squirm and writhe under the intensity of his gaze.
The rational part of you is literally beating in a hysterical frenzy. It's your hope that your stupid brain will realise the full implications of what's happening, and that you'll be able to put a stop to it. Even if the boundaries of your friendship were highly questionable, you were friends. While the evil voice in the back of your head was cheering you on: "C'mon, what's the bad that can happen?"
He was inviting you, and who were you to refuse? Not that you wanted to.
They'd go crazy if San and Wooyoung knew what thoughts and fantasies lived in your head every day. Huh. They had no idea their sweet chagia had such a dark and dirty mind. You take a deep breath.
Screw it.
You slowly crawl across the bed towards him. He watches you with a squinting, predatory look on his face until one of your legs has been thrown across his body and you're almost sitting on top of him. Almost, as your thighs struggle to keep you in that rigid position, but apparently Woo wasn't in the mood, and his broad palms force your hips down so you're sitting all the way in his lap. Before you realise what you're doing, you're pinned against his crotch, his hard cock touching your aching clit as you move against him, demanding physical stimulation. The contact was so good that it sent a shiver down your spine, and you almost moaned at the tiny moment of pleasure it gave you. Damn, it was massive—so thick you started salivating in your mouth. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. You're up to your neck in shit. 
"There you are, starlight, in my hands." His voice, once so high and soft, was now hoarse and deep. He wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you even closer to him, so that there was hardly any space between the two of you. "Baby girl, are you still upset about Seonghwa?" It's a nickname he rarely uses, and it sends an electric shock through your lower abdomen, triggering a feeling you're not sure you can control right now. He leans in close to you and presses his wet lips against the side of your ear. "Tell me what I can do to stop you being angry with me."
"Kiss me, make me feel good." The evil little voice in the back of your head chimes in with glee. "Blow my brains out until my head feels empty and light." It says.
A whole new sensation takes over. Your body starts to heat up in anticipation of what is to come. Then the room will seem to shrink and the air will fill with a tension and a desire.
"I don't know. You've really pissed me off." You look up at him through your impossibly thick lashes, your lips in a fake pout. You weren't the innocent one; you could have played just as badly as they did. "You'll have to try harder, pretty boy." You let your finger nails run down the length of his neck. Wooyoung tilts his head back to reveal a chin line that could have been carved from the finest marble.
As his hands lazily caress your thighs, lifting your T-shirt higher and higher, your skin burns under his palms. Damn, he's scalding you.
The wetness between your legs is becoming more and more intense as the conversation goes on and on. Your juices seep through the thin lace of your panties, dripping from your pussy, leaving little dark streaks on the silk of his trousers where they touch your thighs. The air between you crackles with tension and desire; you feel yourself sweating; you're so hot and needy; and Wooyoung is no help at all.
His aura is one of dominance, and you swallow in anticipation. A storm is about to break and you don't want to be safe.
"I'll do whatever you want me to do for you, Y/N."
You're done for.
"Then kiss me, stupid boy, make me feel good."
He growls back at you, embracing you on the back of the head and practically forcing your faces together. The palm of his hand clenches possessively on the back of your neck with palpable pain, and the sound that comes out of you is something between a sob and a moan. With the sudden movement, you feel yourself pressing even harder against his dick, and it sends a pleasurable pulse through your clit.
Wooyoung presses his forehead against yours and your lips are just a breath away from each other.
You stare back at him without blinking. His eyes are half closed as he watches you in silence, like a tiger stalking its prey, ready to pounce with its jaws clenched. It is in a low, dangerously calm tone that he speaks. "Are you sure this is what you want to do, baby girl? I'm biting." It's mixed with your sighing and seductive lips, and you can barely make out the words.
"P-please…"
His moan is loud, guttural, and mildly painful, and then…
O MY GOD.
Those soft lips are pressed hard against yours in an urgent, hungry kiss. His mouth is insistent and demanding, his thumb digging into the skin of your neck, turning the touch into a rough grip, and his tongue gliding along the bottom of your lip. Slowly, as he pulls your lips apart, he moves in quickly, and you shudder at the sensual sensation as he runs his tongue over the roof of your mouth and licks your teeth. It should have been dirty and rough, but instead you find yourself moaning with wanton need.
"Wooyoung..." The moan of his name was so desperate, so needy, so full of lust and desire.
"Goddamn, I love it when you say my name."
He kisses you with renewed ferocity, biting your lips almost to the point of bleeding. Wooyoung is too passionate; he licks your mouth with his tongue, and literally shoves it down your throat. He kisses you like he's dying of thirst and you're the only way to make him drink. Spittle runs down your chin, it's wet and dirty, but you can't stop, you don't want to stop. Wooyoung's tongue is practically fucking you in the mouth.
And God, you want more. It feels unreal, too extreme to be a reasonable response to a kiss, the heat between your legs, your clit throbbing with need, your nerves on fire.
Wooyoung lets go of you for a moment and you stare at him with your eyes wide open. Your heart is pounding wildly and your breathing is so ragged that you're practically choking to death. Licking away any remnants of the kiss you shared, his wet pink tongue pokes out from between his plump lips.
His hand slides down your face, cupping your chin and tilting your head slightly so that your eyes meet his, his gaze clouded with lust as if his fingers were digging deep inside you. You can't say a word as a wicked smile spreads across his sharp, enchanting face.
Now you have a better understanding of all those damsels who are ready to spread their legs at the flick of his fingers.
"Tell me you want more, baby. I have a feeling this apology isn't enough. I need to do more than that. I'm so desperate for forgiveness.
"Don't I need to be forgiven too, Woo? You shouldn't be so greedy. That voice, oh shit.
You turn sharply around and find yourself staring into San's beautiful cat eyes. He's so damn good-looking you swallow a groan. It must be illegal for someone to look this good in normal jeans and a plain black shirt. But San had a body worth dying over.
A real girl's dinner.
What the hell are you going to do now? How long had he stayed there?
"San-ah… how…" You find yourself stuttering. Your mouth dries up and you can't utter a word, but even if you could, your brain can't form coherent thoughts. You can't bring yourself to look away from him, and something deep inside you knows that he will punish you if you try.
"What is it, Gongjunim? Did the cat eat your tongue?" He raises an eyebrow at you, a shit-eating grin playing at the corners of his lips. As if in mockery, his soft, patronising tone of voice slides over your skin. San combines a sensual, gentle nature with a seductive one that makes you feel he's looking for a weakness before pouncing. His fucking duality. One moment he's a little sweetheart, the next he's a lecherous demon who wants to sink his teeth into your throat and devour you. "Come on, Chagia, I promise I won't disappoint you; I'm very good at excuses."
Responding to his sultry purr, your pussy clenches shamefacedly.
The excitement of it all makes your brain feel like mush and sets your skin on fire.
You start squirming in Wooyoung's arms, and now that San's here, you belatedly realise what you've gotten yourself into. Is it time for a change of scenery or something? No, you want to stay. Desperately.
You need them to blow your brains out, to make you dumb and submissive and a pretty little toy for them to play with. Sometimes you have to stop before you cross the line, but where is the line when you're literally sitting on your best friend's hard cock?
Hell, you don't know what you're supposed to do - run or beg - but you clearly know what they want to do to you, judging by Wooyoung's dick twitching between your thighs and San slowly licking his lips as he looks at your bare ass peeking out from under your shirt. His shirt.
There must be some kind of telepathic connection between Wooyoung and San. After a few seconds of intense eye contact, San pulls his T-shirt over his head, tosses it aside and slowly walks over to you. The grin on his face seems to have changed; it has become even darker than before. Hungrier.
And you don't think this is a good time to start drooling. But damn it, you want to lick him from head to toe.
Between the three of you, there's a chaos of emotion and desire. It's mixed with adrenaline and a distant fear of what's going to happen. There has to be an end to this game of predator and prey, and why not do it now? Sighing, you finally give in.
In the morning, you'll consider the consequences.
"Maybe you should kiss me too, San-ah, and I'll start thinking about forgiving.
Hot lips instantly press an open, wet kiss to your shoulder. The bed buckles under the weight of another man's body. San's strong arms are wrapped around your waist and his fingers clench your t-shirt into a fist. He's hot, warm and hard, and you can feel the hardness of his dick through your trousers as he presses down hard against you. His mouth is sucking, biting and licking your skin as if his life depended on it. Sharing an understanding look with Wooyoung, San slides his lips higher up your body.
"Sannie…" Before planting a hot kiss on your neck, you whimper as his teeth sink into your sensitive flesh.
The moan that comes from the back of your throat is so deep that for a moment you wonder if it's coming from you at all.
Pure pleasure shoots through you as you feel Woo's long tongue on the other side of your neck. He lets out the sexiest moan deep in his throat, as if he's having the time of his life, savouring every second of the way his lips explore the nape of your neck. You're distracted. Your eyes roll back in pleasure as he pulls the skin between his lips, leaving a purple hickey on the back of your neck.
"Oh, my God, boys."
"That's my darling, Chagia." His voice is sultry and seductive, and you can clearly hear the saturi again, as it tends to do at times when San is in a highly aroused state.
"You're so beautiful, my peach." Wooyoung whispers to you, and you just melt away completely.
You whimper as Woo begins to run his hands up and down your thighs and arse, squeezing and pulling. He mooed softly as you made little circular movements with your hips and rubbed his cock against you. Woo punishes you by slapping your bottom if you cuddle too hard. You'll need to be obedient as they play with you.
The sound fills the room along with the collective moaning of Wooyoung's and San's.
"What a dirty little girl you are. I think you need to be taught how to obey." Woo spanks you a few more times and you wiggle your hips in an impatient way.
It feels so good.
San pulls your t-shirt up to your breasts while all your attention is focused on Wooyoung. Your little thong is completely transparent and does nothing to hide your sex or the excitement building within you. They are practically digging into your needy pussy because of the position you are now in. A chorus of gasps and moans can be heard from your best friends as their eyes focus on that big, wet spot. San's greedy hands press you even closer to his body, so that you can feel his full erection on top of your plump, bare bum.
"You're so fucking wet." Wooyoung hisses. "Like a bitch leaking just thinking about our cocks in your tight little cunt. We'll destroy you, Peach."
Before you realise what's happening, Woo's hands slide down your back, your nipples tensing in the cool open air. The soft fabric of your t-shirt falls to the floor, and suddenly, hot wetness envelops your left nipple and he sucks hard on it, the pressure causing pain that turns to pleasure as his tongue touches the hard bud. Your head immediately falls back onto San's shoulder as you open the soft space of your throat to his insatiable mouth. You let out a long groan, and your hand rests on Wooyoung's head, tugging lightly at the soft lengths of his hair.
You feel like you could explode at any moment, even though they haven't done anything to you yet. You're burning, almost feverish, as the growing fire between your thighs reaches unbearable levels. You can't breathe; your skin is hypersensitive. Your head tilts to the side, and you whimper San's name in the most pathetic intonation possible. His hand slides lower and lower, past your waist and your stomach, to the place where you most want to feel him. It hasn't even come close to touching your pussy yet, but the thought of it is enough to make you squirm with excitement.
His hands move down low enough to touch the skin of your naked legs and up slowly, frantically, until he reaches where you are starting to get aroused. The palm of his hand encircles your pussy in a possessive way, the small mound of flesh lying so perfectly in the palm of his hand. You tremble a little at this, and try to spread your legs wider so that his fingers can rub against the moist slit, so that he can dive in between the warm folds until your pussy spreads out beautifully for him, so that he can rub your clit with ease.
"Mmm… what a wet little thing. I bet my Gongjunim has the most beautiful pussy I have ever seen in my life. Fleshy, shiny, and pink - just the way I like it. He gasps for breath. He puts his hands on your hips and rubs his hard cock against the curve of your ass a couple of times. "Do you feel that, Chagia? No one can make me as hard as you can." On your skin, his breath feels like fire. Hoping for a little more friction, you arch your backside. The gesture reveals a hiss from his side.
San's fingers, one tempting back and forth with a feathery touch, spread the excitement building in your slit beneath the thin material. Your pussy clenches around nothing at all in the most uncomfortable way, and you know that he can feel it.
"Do you like this chagi? Wooyoung's mouth on your full, pretty tits? My fingers on your sweet little snatch?" San's tone is almost mocking. His tongue is licking his lips; his fingers continue to stroke your clothed pussy in a leisurely manner; and he watches intently as Wooyoung literally chokes on your breasts. "We are gonna fuck you until you squeal like the slutty little bitch you are." He growls into your ear, and the sound of it makes you pull on Woo's hair with all your might.
And you always had the impression that Wooyoung's mouth was dirty.
A soft moan slips out of the brunette's swollen lips, which are now wrapped so tightly around your nipple that you're sure they're going to leave a mark on it. As he pulls back with an audible pop, you let out a small sound as you look at his ecstatic face. His eyes are half closed, his eyelids flutter slightly and a beautiful flush of colour has appeared on his cheeks. His plump lips are glistening with the saliva and the service he is giving to your tits.
"Are you feeling good, peach?" He chuckles weakly as he watches you fall apart in San's skilled hands, leaving you as beautiful as ever in his eyes. Woo gives your nipple a hard pinch, only to then let his tongue run over it. The sudden change in sensation causes your head to begin to spin, and you let out a loud moan of pleasure.
"Please… I need… more… Youngiee." You stammer out the words, your voice shaking and your body trembling.
"You look so pretty when you beg. But do you want to know something, сhagi? You'll look even more beautiful with your cunt stretched around my dick. I will ravage your tiny pussy, Gongjunim. I'm going to make you mine." San finally kisses you; though it's hard to call it a kiss, he dives into your lips like a hungry man, sucking them so deeply and passionately, with an insistence that you don't even think you'll ever understand.
His tongue is merciless as he explores every millimeter of the inside of your mouth. This kiss is heavenly, and with every second that passes, you find yourself wanting more, wanting him to spoil you in every way that he can. To have his way with you until you have no more patience. And it is these thoughts that make you wriggle in Wooyoung's arms. You try to rub your thighs together, hoping to relieve the unbearable heat inside you.
"The taste is so damn good."
You can feel Woo squeezing your breasts almost in sync, his warm tongue sliding over the plump flesh once more, licking at the aroused nipples, and his teeth scratching the sensitive skin with the lightest of touches. You savour the lightning bolts of pleasure that the two of them cause to bounce around your body. It's almost painful, but you know you're loving this.
Half gasping, half squealing at the sheer, blunt pressure of San's nimble, kneading fingers finding their way to your labia through the mesh of the thong. Your lower abdomen clenches in a reflexive spasm, and your hands are sticky with sweat as you grasp the wrist of his hand.
"Oh, your pussy is so sensitive, isn't it, Chagia?" San cooed with feigned tenderness, and with a strange sadism, he pressed his middle finger against your cunt, sliding it right over the spot where your clit was, causing your hips to shake. The lubrication of your arousal made it much more effective for him to stimulate you, and he would literally bring you to orgasm with minimal effort. He purred softly as you responded, like a big cat purring, and just when you thought he couldn't fuck with your sanity even more, he turned his head and spat on your lips, a glob of saliva dribbling into your open mouth and you choked out a moan.
It's so rough and dirty, but your body responds the best it can, arching into his arms and pressing your breasts even harder against Wooyoung's face.
The brunette moans in response and lifts his foxy eyes to you. You can see the corner of his lips curl into a smirk before he bites down hard on your nipple. Fuck, your life will never be the same. And they haven't even got around to fucking you properly yet. It's like heaven and hell at the same time.
"I want to hear you whimper, Gongjunim." San's hand grips the back of your neck very tightly, causing you to gasp for breath from the sudden lack of air. Your eyes begin to roll up at the possessive touch of his hand on your throat, and you begin to jerk your hips, your clit pressing against Wooyoung's cock, and he lets out a long, hard moan.
"Please, Sannie." You're breathing out.
"Look at her, San, our girl, slobbering like a brainless slut." Wooyoung wipes the viscous saliva from your parted lips, then pushes his fingers into your mouth with a sharp, deep thrust. For a second you choke and begin to gurgle around the long phalanges.
He hadn't removed the rings yesterday and now the heavy metal makes your tongue feel cold. "Think of the way my dick is fucking your little throat, starlight. Suck it hard." You wheeze and gurgle, your saliva bubbling at the corners of your lips, but you have done exactly as you have been told.
It was rough, it was horrible and it was so wet that it was almost disgusting to watch. But Woo enjoyed it; he literally raped your mouth with his fingers in a sort of sadistic sense. A few thick strands of saliva would stick to your swollen lips as he pulled his fingers out of your mouth.
"Look at you. Taking my fingers in your mouth like that. Such a good girl."
This whole game has been nothing more than a distraction from the main action. There's a short circuit in your body as a sharp sensation pierces every nerve in your body. San suddenly slaps you hard on your wet pussy, the contact sending sparks of pain and pleasure flying across your skin, and you let out a squeal.
"Oh my God. Oh, my God. I'm going to… I'm going to…" You go over the edge as you feel your juices pouring down your legs, your vaginal muscles contracting, forcing more fluid to pour out of you, the combination of their names coming weakly from your lips as your orgasm washes over your weakened limbs.
"Fuck, Peach is so hot… You're squirting." You belatedly realise that Wooyoung is also cumming as he throws his head back in pleasure, his eyes rolling up and his mouth opening in a long, whimpering moan.
You can hardly catch your breath when you feel San rest his chin on your shoulder, his grip tightening around you, whispering in your ear.
"One more gongjunim; give me one more orgasm and then I'll caress you."
"Ah, San." The searing sensation of his fingers roughly pinching your clit through the wet material of your thong causes you to cry out hoarsely in agony. The sound of your wet, sensitive cunt splashing was clear and vivid; the sensation was brutal, but so indescribable you were ready to faint from pleasure.
He's going to tear you apart.
"Cum for me, Chagia. I know you can do it. Sperm for us; make Youngie and me proud of you".
Your eyes rolled back in your head and you swore that your cunt was on fire, your whole body shuddering in electrifying spasms of pleasure that made your toes curl up and your thighs shake. San's hand was still firmly around your throat, holding your head upright as you had your orgasm.
It had shattered you so badly that the fall seemed dramatic, and you went completely limp as the orgasm dissipated, turning you into an inconsolable, whimpering, disorderly mass.
They had blown your brains out.
"There you are, Gongjunim, I got you. You did so well." San muttered, but your mind was too tired to admit it. Amused at how angry and lost you looked, you saw stars as Wooyoung's hand tilted your head to the side in a teasing way to look at your confused face.
"You're no longer angry with us, are you, Peach?"
San removes his hand from your throat and allows Wooyoung to pull your face up to his own. Gentle fingers caress your cheekbones and soft lips wipe away the tears rolling down your cheeks. At one point, you didn't even realise you were crying. It's such a contrast to his previous behaviour; here he is your usual adored Jung Wooyoung, a little clingy, a little annoying and with an unrealistic maternal instinct. Your best friend.
Fuck. Now it is time for you to start crying for the real time. You begin to sob, pushing Wooyoung away from you in a desperate attempt to get out of his arms. You can feel the wetness underneath you and it makes you feel worse and worse. You need to get out of here now. Your behaviour frightens them to death and San's hands are on your body again, squeezing your shoulders gently.
"Stop, stop for a second, Y/N. It's all right, Chagia. We have you."
You freeze at the sound of your name, like a deer caught in the headlights.
In anticipation of his next move, your whole body tenses like a string. Wooyoung's fingers intertwine with yours. It's a familiar gesture, so familiar to you, so ordinary, so perfected over the years of your friendship. San lets you go when he realises you're not going anywhere, and his face comes to rest next to Wooyoung's as you look at him.
He's handsome, too, to the point of madness, and trembles at the knees. His cheeks are flushed. There's still a lingering gleam of lust and excitement in his eyes, but with a touch of strange emotion. His plush lips are soft and swollen from all the kissing, and his body glistens with sweat. And the reason he looks like that is because of you. You look at Wooyoung and see that he looks exactly the same, but the emotion in his eyes is more obvious than ever.
You want to crawl off his lap and cower in shame in the corner of the room so you don't have to look at all that tenderness and loveliness in his foxy eyes. You can handle his cheeky, flirtatious backside with ease, but this kind of Wooyoung is new territory for you.
"We… shit. This shouldn't have happened. This is the first rational thought to come out of your mouth all day. And you should have said it a lot sooner, before your two best friends made you cum twice with a squirting orgasm.
"Chagia, I think there's something we need to talk about, but first let's get you back to your normal self."
You don't argue; just nod and realize that San is absolutely right. You look like a complete mess, covered in saliva and lubricant. You can feel Wooyoung's cum seeping through the fabric of his pajama bottoms and drying on the inside of your thigh.
You look fucked.
"Yes, I think we have a lot to talk about."
It sounds terribly stupid, but what else can you say? Can we forget it? Or can we fuck again?
All your years of sexual longing for them have turned into a resounding slap in your face.
"Go take a bath, Peach, and we'll talk. San and I will take care of the rest."
For some reason, this sentence gave you a vague feeling of déjà vu. But you pushed the thought out of your head as quickly as it had come.
"Okay."
You finally slide off Wooyoung's lap, ignoring their stares at your almost naked body, there's no point in covering up or acting like a shy maiden, San's fingertips were rubbing your pussy just five minutes ago, bringing you to some kind of crazy orgasm, and the entire lower half of Woo's body is drenched in your secretions. If you've ever wanted to imagine how your friendship would turn out, this is it.
You trudge to the bathroom on your tired legs, pulling off your disgustingly wet thong on the way and throwing it on the floor. You turn on the light, turn on the tap and the whole room is immediately filled with the warm steam of hot water. Outside the door you can hear the muffled voices of the boys, who seem to be having some sort of heated argument, judging by San's irritated moaning and Wooyoung's loud whining.
You don't want to go into details; you still have time to destroy yourself. Your eyes catch sight of your reflection in the mirror. Tomorrow has come much earlier for you, if the fucked-up look on your face is any indication. Dishevelled hair, hickey marks, bruises and swollen lips from biting. What a beautiful morning after graduation!
"Wooyoung, you should have waited for me." San's voice is much louder now.
"As if I'm the only one who fucked her. Don't try to tell me it's all my fault."
You still don't want to join the conversation.
A pink, glistening puddle of something that smells like candy spreads across the bathtub. Thanks to Mingi, you have a whole collection of these colourful bombs. He's always had a soft spot for all things cute and charming, and he's taken every opportunity to spoil you to death with them.
With a tired sigh, you take another look at yourself in the mirror. So, Peach, are you ready for the consequences?
Turning away from your reflection, you lock the door with a click.
819 notes · View notes
goldenroutledge · 9 months
Text
intimidated
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pairing: jj maybank x kook!reader
word count: 5.3k
summary: you’re there for jj when it matters most. (inspired by this post)
warning(s): sprinkles of angst, but fluffy in the end.
a/n: the song i had in mind while writing this was intimidated by kaytranada & h.e.r <3
jj maybank masterlist
© goldenroutledge || do not plagiarize, repost, or translate my work in any way
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JJ Maybank didn’t need handouts. As he told it, his independence was his most valuable asset. It’s what made him a pogue through and through. “Is freedom anything else than the right to live as we wish?”— An Epictetus quote JJ scribbled down, bored as ever in his freshman English class. His life motto condensed into twelve simple words, whether his newfound ‘freedom’ was out of his control or not. Either way, he played the cards he was dealt.
His friends— no, scratch that— his family, were his escape to comfort. A soft, pillowy landing from the nose dive that was his life. A foreign concept to him until he met John B, then Pope, then Kiara, then you. A refuge of safety, ironically enough, given the many times you all had looked death in the face.
Even though the pogues had already started wearing matching friendship bracelets that Kiara made by the time you came along, it was a smooth transition when you were welcomed into the group with open arms. By some more than others at first, given your kook status. But just as they’d embraced Kie, your initiation into the group was no different.
While it took time for JJ in particular to come around, his reservations were understandable. At first, you gave him his space and he gave you yours. Always letting him set the tone and lead the way.
As time went on, JJ soon decided he wouldn’t mind having you around him all the time, there was no going back. JJ loved to the point of no return, and it was incomparable to anything— or how anyone else could ever make you feel.
At times, he felt like that was all he had to offer. Nothing but fierce loyalty and protection over the ones he loves most. But you. To JJ, you were the fine line between hideaway and heaven itself. Even if he thought he may not end up there, he was sure that it would be you he’d meet at heaven’s gates.
Amongst any conflict or tension within the group, you always provided a safe haven for him to retreat to, though he had difficulty admitting it. In a way you had a solution for everything. Keeping tensions low and spirits high in the process. You were the original peacemaker of the group, before his precious gun came along.
Right now, it was almost all he could think about while he sat there, beer in hand, listening to John B and Sarah argue in the distance. How he wishes you were here, to ease his nerves and settle the anxiety simmering in his chest.
JJ hated this. He hated that nobody seemed to get along anymore. With all that was going on with the others, he wouldn’t even think to mention his problems. The looming eviction notice on his house, one of few things he had left on this island. While everyone’s lives continued to progress, JJ’s was at a standstill. No job, no parents, and now his friend group was falling apart at the seams. And with everyone else occupied these days, he was alone.
JJ, selfless as usual, would hate to bother you, no matter how badly he wanted to. He knew you’d have some inspirational shit to say to him. Though he’d poked fun at it sometimes, he’d never needed anything more right now.
The sound of footsteps came before JJ saw them, watching Sarah storm off and away from John B as he stood there, tense and silent.
JJ could be hot headed at times, that was no secret. He could understand his friends' quarrels to an extent. But he couldn’t look past the fact that you all were supposed to be sticking together, especially right now. When he said that nothing good could happen once you all returned to Kildare, he knew he was right. Call it a gut feeling.
-
Naturally, Sarah told you everything. Confidant, mom-friend, advisor— all titles bestowed upon you by your close group of friends over the years. You’d always tried to be as neutral as possible in times of conflict. Though in matters of the heart it was nearly impossible.
Days after her fight with John B, she found herself laying on your bed, venting all of her bottled up frustrations about him and the state of their relationship.
“I’m a mess, Y/n. I feel like such a mess.”
You looked at her sympathetically, knowing there wasn’t much you could do. Just listen, just be there in her time of need.
“So, I took my bag from the Chateau and I left. Kie’s parents told me I couldn’t stay, then I went to JJ’s and he wasn’t home. He’s working at Guffy’s again last I heard.”
You briefly glanced up at the mention of JJ’s name— and it didn’t go unnoticed by Sarah. Instead of divulging about it, she continued her rant.
“Then I was just wandering around, because it’s not like I had anything better to do. And who sees me drinking at Tiki Bar? Topper.”
“Topper?”
“Topper.”
You internally cringed at the mention of the Thornton boy. He was always nice when you saw him, nothing bad nor good to say about him. But you knew deep down he was Sarah’s achilles heel. He reminded her of everything she once had, the person she once was. Lately, you couldn’t help but crave some normalcy too.
“So.. what happened?”
She sighs heavily, dropping her hand across her eyes. “We went to Mase.”
“Alone?”
“We went with some people from KDC. The old crew, Kelce, Phoebe…”
“Is that it?”
“We made out.”
Sarah squeezed her eyes shut in fear of your reaction, knowing it’d probably show on your face before anything.
“Oh.” You swallowed back any judgment you might’ve had, compartmentalizing your love for John B and choosing to hear Sarah out. “And how do you feel about it?”
“Awful. I mean Topper has been so good to me lately with everything going on, he’s always there to pick up the pieces and I just feel bad. It was a mistake.”
“It can’t happen again, y’know. Not if you want to work it out with John B.”
“I do, I wanna work it out with him.” She urged. “And then the next morning we had breakfast. Kie came into the restaurant and saw us together and I think she got the wrong message. She said she’s staying out of it but I can tell what she’s thinking.” Sarah takes a deep inhale, and a deep exhale to follow. “What do I do, Y/n?”
It still baffles you at times that you’ve become the voice of reason. You hope Sarah doesn’t notice that you feel uneasy about the whole thing. “Just… be honest. Don’t let John B find out from anyone other than you. He’s gonna be upset but he has a right to be.”
The blonde sits up, crawls over to you and envelopes you into her arms. “Don’t know what I’d do without you.”
-
Sun reflected brightly off the boats docked at the marina, the two smoothie cups in your hand sweating from the sweltering heat. Your family's boat was kept here at Guffy’s; particularly when your parents weren’t in town to cruise around the island and daydrink with their kook friends.
At least you had an alibi, just in case you happened to run into JJ. The two medium strawberry banana smoothies you carried might need some explanation, though.
Ever since you all had made it back to the island, JJ had been hard to track down. He was rarely in one place for too long. So where else better to catch him than at work?
“Y/n? How are you doing today?” Billy questions from a distance away, putting on his friendliest smile for the daughter of his best clients.
“Can’t complain. Happy to be back.”
“And it’s good to have you back. Everything alright with the boat?”
“Oh yeah, everything’s fine, I just realized I left behind my favorite sunglasses.” You explained, hoping your excuse sounded authentic enough.
“Alright. You take care, now.”
“Actually… I was wondering is JJ around?”
“Maybank? He was here a few days ago.”
“Hm, I could’ve sworn he was working today.”
Billy sighs, eyebrows furrowing. “Listen, Ms. Y/l/n, I know you want to advocate for your boyfriend and all but JJ can’t work here.”
Confusion spread through your features this time as you genuinely had no idea what the man was getting at. You chose to not correct him when he’d mistaken you for JJ’s girlfriend.
“Don’t get me wrong, he’s a good kid. I know he wants the job back but Guffy put a pin in it. I’m sorry. Really not much I can do.”
You forced a polite smile on your face as the dots connected, remembering the melting smoothie you held in your left hand while your half-finished one remained in your right. The two of you exchanged brief goodbyes before you quickly left the marina.
If JJ really hadn’t been working at Guffy’s again, where the hell was he? His act of disappearing was unmatched, but so was your skill of guessing.
If a game of hide-n-seek is what he wanted, a game of hide-n-seek is what he will get.
-
Grass brushed against your ankles as you approached JJ’s home, your steps careful as you looked around for him.
Going to JJ’s home was forbidden. When Luke was around, that is. He was a phantom— an ugly, dark presence looming over the quaint home that would otherwise feel serene. The chirping birds in the trees couldn’t tell the difference.
You haven't been here many times. The times you had been here weren’t anything you nor JJ wanted to remember. The feeling of uncertainty creeped into your mind from your past visits. You never knew what to expect.
To your left, there was a beautiful, never-ending view of the water past the grass of the Maybank’s yard. You hadn’t noticed that before. This spot had probably seen some beautiful sunsets. In a moment of imagination, you almost pictured sitting there with JJ on the plush green, hand in hand, watching the warm hues of the sky melt into a dark night.
The caution tape wrapping around the wood of the house caught your interest as you made your way onto the porch, also noticing the eviction letter left on the door, moving closer for a better look.
“Y/n?”
JJ called out, appearing from around the corner of his home, startling you out of concentration as you re-read the notice again and again.
As if you didn’t come over to finally see him in the first place. Though you couldn’t speak— for once unsure of what to say. ‘Sorry you’re getting evicted?’, it just didn’t sound right. Then again it might’ve been better than standing frozen and staring at him, silently, like you were doing.
“What are you doing here?”
“I- um…. I brought you a smoothie.”
You held out the cup, approaching him and handing it to him. He stood there dumbfounded, eyebrows furrowed. His lips eventually pursed into a smile as a way to say thank you. This wasn’t the relaxed JJ you were accustomed to; nonetheless he was still the JJ you loved.
“Why are you here?”
“I told you. The smoothie.”
“You came all the way out here from your mansion on Figure 8 to bring me a smoothie?”
“What?” You scoffed, his tone dictating where the conversation was headed. Most likely nowhere.
“Go back to reading by your pool or something. You shouldn’t be here.”
“I haven’t heard from you in days, JJ. I’m just checking up on you.”
“So what? You touring around the Cut now? Delivering smoothies to lost pogues? Is Heyward’s your next stop?”
He resumed tinkering with his bike, and from the looks of it he was working rather aggressively— desperate to distract himself from the conversation at hand.
“I miss my best friend. Am I not allowed to miss you anymore? I mean it’s not like we were stranded on an island together… not knowing whether we would live or die!”
“Well, we’re not exactly a big happy family right now. You should know that.”
“Yeah. John B and Sarah are on some kind of break. But that doesn’t mean I can’t see you, that doesn’t have anything to do with us. I thought we were past the whole picking sides thing.”
“I’ve been busy.” JJ shrugs.
“Busy working? At the job you lied about having?”
His eyes snapped to yours immediately. Your heart clenched as soon as the words left your mouth, you didn’t mean to go too far. But at least you had his attention.
“What, are you stalking me now? Or did you hire a P.I. to figure that out?”
“Hilarious, JJ. I was at the marina earlier to grab something off my boat. Actually hoping I would run into you but, whatever.”
“Yeah. Whatever.”
A few moments of awkward silence lingered between the two of you, as you kicked a pebble around with your foot.
“I know you don’t owe me anything… but you could’ve just told me.”
He paused his movements, thinking about how he was going to respond.
“Tell you what? That I prefer mixed berry over strawberry banana?” He jested, smiling to himself.
“I’m not talking about the smoothie, idiot.”
His eyes drifted over to his home, knowing exactly what you were thinking, just afraid to acknowledge it.
“My problems aren’t your problems, Y/n.”
“And I know that. I just wanna help you, however you’ll let me.”
“Well, you can help me by not helping me. I’ll figure it out. Always do.”
“All I’m saying is you don’t have to figure it out alone. I’m here.”
At that, he dropped his tools, running tense hands through his hair. “But you aren’t here! You don’t have to live like this and you should be glad that you don’t!”
He raised his voice at you, frustrated. JJ was never good at putting his feelings into words, especially when it came to actually expressing them.
He didn’t know how he could tell you about everything. The worst day he’s ever had, the lowest he’s ever been. He couldn’t see a way in which he could tell you all of it and carry on the same. You were always a constant in his life. He needed it to stay that way, by any means necessary.
“That doesn’t make sense, JJ. What’s the point of having anything nice if I can’t share it with the people I love?”
The both of you were taken aback at what your explanation implied. In actuality, it took all of your power not to say those three words to him outright. But you couldn’t, not like this.
“You don’t have to pretend to care that much. I’m sure you can find another community service project to focus on.”
“Community service?” You chuckled emptily, baffled at his ridiculousness, though deep down you knew this was how he dealt with things. He simply didn’t know anything other than defensiveness. “That’s what you think this is?”
JJ closed his eyes in exasperation, wishing this conversation away. He could hear it in your voice, your feelings were hurt. Maybe not as bad as when your 8th grade crush asked someone else to the Valentine’s dance— but even a little was too much.
“If you’re gonna reduce our decade of friendship to me doing charity work, I guess there’s no changing your mind. I’m just wasting my breath.”
The words were stuck in his throat. He wanted to apologize instantly, but now he wasn’t sure if his apologies were something you’d wanna hear at the moment. He wasn’t sure if you’d believe him.
For all the disingenuous apologies he’d accepted over the years, he’d hate to put you on the receiving end of one. Even if his heart truly was in the right place, JJ couldn’t muster up the courage to show it.
“You don’t have to antagonize me. Because everything you’re blaming me for, it isn’t my fault. Just like this isn’t your fault either.” You gestured to the eviction notice at his door.
“Yeah.” He mumbled. “You’re right.”
“Say what you want about me, but I just wanna know that you’re okay. And if it’s an apology you’re looking for, you’re not gonna get it. I’ll never apologize for that.”
He nodded, unsure of what else to say. All he could do was try to understand.
Realizing he had no further comments, you turned your back to leave.
“Will I see you at the Chateau tomorrow?” You asked over your shoulder, hope remaining in your voice despite the uneasiness that remained between you two.
“Don’t count on it.”
“Alright, well… bye.”
JJ waves, before muttering a monotone ‘thanks for the smoothie’ as he watches you go.
-
Since returning to the island, it was an unspoken thing that you all were to meet up at the Chateau at some point. And with all the new developments in your lives lately, these meetings were much needed.
Pope handed you a beer as he came into John B’s living room, opening one of his own as he sat down beside you.
John B and Sarah seemed to be laying low, but it was clear they were back together or had come to some sort of resolution.
Kiara was going on about how much shit her parents had been giving her lately. They’d been hovering— watching over their daughter’s every move from the moment she set foot on the island again.
Pope told the group about how Cleo had won over Heywar in record time, much faster than John B or JJ. Pope’s parents simply wanted the best for him, and knew that the danger and mischief his friends came with couldn’t be productive.
“We’ve been best friends for what…? 13 years?” John B recalls. “And your dad can hardly stand the sight of me but Cleo won him over in a few minutes? How?”
“Are you surprised?”
“Not at all.” John B holds his hands up in surrender to Cleo, Pope smirking beside her as he witnesses the interaction. “Just confused.”
“I have many superpowers, John.”
“Apparently! Winning over Heyward is like, unheard of in this group. At least for JJ and me.” John B explains, sipping his beer.
“Speaking of, where’s he at?”
At the shift in conversation, you can feel several pairs of eyes fall upon you. All you can do is act as normal as possible, tipping off any of your friends always ends badly in the case of keeping a secret. Until the cat’s out of the bag, your friends will make it their personal mission to reveal whatever it is you’re hiding.
You raised your eyebrows, pretending to only catch onto their stares moments later. “Why’re you looking at me?”
“No reason. It’s not like you guys are secretly together or anything.” Pope mutters under his breath, catching a glare from you at his false claim.
“We’re not. I wouldn’t know where he is.”
John B hisses, pretending to shiver. “Is it a little chilly in here? Or is that just Y/n’s cold shoulder?”
You roll your eyes, further proving his point until Sarah chimes in, pondering if she should speak up about what she knows.
“I actually stopped by JJ’s the other day. He.. wasn’t home.”
“Oh yeah, didn’t he go fishing? Probably not back yet.” John B remembers.
“I don’t think he’ll be going home anytime soon.”
At this your eyes meet Sarah’s hazel ones, full of hesitation. You shoot her a look of ‘whatever you’re about to say, don’t’, and you hope she is wise enough to pick up on it.
“Why is that?” Kiara questions, confused.
“He got evicted.” Sarah blurts, regret spreading through her expression as she sees you react; you don’t react. And that slightly terrifies her.
“Really?” Pope asks in disbelief, though not too surprised. More so disappointed that his best friend had to endure this, silently at that.
“Yeah. When was the last time anyone’s heard from him?”
The group silently recollects for a few moments, Kie pulls out her phone to review her latest texts with the man in question.
Instead, you’re wondering how the hell Sarah even knew about this to begin with. How long could she know about this and just stay silent? Forget not telling the group, how long could she keep this from you? How could she not help her friend who was clearly in need of support?
“How long have you known?”
Sarah appears confused, wondering where your line of questioning is coming from.
“I- uh. After John B and I fought I went there, remember Y/n? I was hoping I could stay but he wasn’t home. That’s when I saw the eviction notice.”
“And you waited, I don’t know, a week to bring that up?”
“Y/n, it’s not like I intentionally kept this from you, okay? We know how protective you are over JJ.”
Her words strike a cord within you, already on edge regarding JJ Maybank because of your argument with him the day prior. It was still a sore subject, even more so made by having no one to confide in about it.
“It’s not about that, Sarah. You didn’t even have to tell anyone at all but you didn’t think to maybe find out if he’s okay? At the very least?”
“I was a bit homeless at the time, Y/n, sorry about that.”
“Oh, right. You were too busy hooking up with Topper to care about the well-being of our best friend? Good to know the bare minimum is impossible for you.”
Sarah scoffs, John B shakes his head in exasperation. Kiara stays silent mostly, being no stranger to your and Sarah’s sister-like fights. She couldn’t even disagree with you, though with her parents keeping her on lockdown it was hard to do anything about it. She wasn’t in a place to have an opinion.
Pope and Cleo shared looks, communicating wordlessly as they had grown to do. Being away at Heyward’s kept them out of the loop quite a bit.
“JJ will figure it out, Y/n. Relax.” John B reassured. Though he was defending his girlfriend, now that they were in a ‘good place’ again, you felt anything but reassured at his carelessness around the subject. You’d think of all of you, John B would understand the most.
“Relax? Why should I relax if JJ is in trouble? If anything, you’re too relaxed!”
“I’m sorry you feel that way but you don’t have to take it out on Sarah, this isn’t even her fault! Not all of us want to fight your battles.”
“If you had any sense left you’d realize this isn’t about me. This is about our friend, who I thought we all cared about. At least enough to share this kind of news. We’re talking about his well-being here, I mean he’s losing the house he grew up in and nobody seems to care about that?”
“If he wanted us to know, he’d tell us.”
“Like he’s ever going to do that! You know better than anyway that he won’t!”
“It’s not my problem.”
“Mhm. It’s a shame JJ’s busy solving all of yours.”
“Y/n, please. Can we just have a chill night?”
“Aren’t you supposed to be his ‘best friend since the third grade?’ Because you don’t fucking act like it.” You huffed, standing up to get rid of your beer can. At this point you were rambling to yourself, more than okay with the group hearing what you really thought about them and their carelessness for the situation.
“Indeed. Which is why I don’t need to force him to tell me shit, okay?”
“Why are you such an asshole, John B?”
“Y/n, I just found my dad. So, excuse me if JJ’s living situation isn’t at the forefront of my mind.”
“I never said it had to be, but you’re acting like you don’t even care!”
“I do care! We all do!” John B shouts. “And maybe if you’d let up on him he’d actually come to you about this stuff!”
“What are you talking about?”
“I’m saying, maybe JJ would give you the love you so desperately crave if you weren’t fucking suffocating him.”
“John B!” Kiara warns.
Sarah held her face in her hands, knowing John B had crossed the line. Maybe he had one too many beers in his system. Either way, hell was about to break loose. And when it came to JJ, hell hath no fury like you did.
Your head felt like it was about to explode. How could your friends seem to be so comfortable with this? The same friends that claimed to leave no pogue behind, to never turn their back on one of their own.
If that was true, then what was this? From the looks of it, nobody even pretended to give a damn.
“You’re fucking terrible, John B. This isn’t even about me at all! You just can’t stop deflecting from what a shitty friend you are. I mean, JJ would die for literally every last one of you guys. And he almost did! On multiple occasions! But instead you’re gonna neglect the one person who's seen you through all your bullshit and as soon as it’s over you’re gonna pretend like nothing happened? Like the Earth is back on its axis? The world doesn’t fucking revolve around you, John B. That’s just not- that’s not something you do to someone you love.”
There wasn’t a need to announce your departure, as it was so quiet inside that you could hear your own breathing.
As hard as it was to fight with John B like that, you couldn’t deny the weight that had been lifted off your chest. Your spirit was lighter. It was therapeutic, really. So therapeutic you felt peaceful enough to go home and take the longest nap ever recorded, maybe in John B’s own hammock just to prove a point.
Entranced in your own thoughts, you didn’t even register JJ resting in the hammock himself, hands intertwined behind his head. Not asleep, but wondering what your next words will be. The walls of the Chateau were thin enough, echoes of your voices amplified by the open windows.
He wasn’t sure if you simply didn’t notice his presence or if you were flat out ignoring him, walking past like he was invisible. Testing the waters, he called out from behind you.
“I never really thanked you for the smoothie.”
You froze in your tracks, face heating up and muscles tensing at the thought of the argument he probably just heard and decided not to barge in on.
“It’s alright. Wasn’t looking for praise.”
JJ met you halfway, taking note of your tired eyes and your feet dragging against the grass.
“So, what? You’re picking fights for me now?”
“You heard?”
“I think Ward Cameron heard. All the way from Guadalupe.”
“Stop it.” You warned, cracking a smile for a split second. JJ was good at that. Making you smile no matter the circumstances. “I stand up against injustice. That’s all.”
“Then are you still mad at me?”
“About what?”
“Yesterday. The whole… note on door situation.”
“Could never be mad at you, JJ. Especially not about that.”
He softly smiles, one that you return. It’s been a long time since you’d shared a small moment like this. Too long.
He gestures for you to come closer and slide into his arms as he’d held them out for you, just like you belong there.
“I am sorry, though.” JJ mumbles the words softly, almost into the crook of your neck as if he was speaking to you and you only. “I know you’re just trying to stick around for me.”
“Yeah. Just trying to be wherever you are.”
“You don’t have to fight for me, y’know.” I’m already here. Though you may not have caught on instantly, nothing he’s ever said has made as much sense.
“Sorry, J. Sometimes I just feel like we don’t deserve you. Like I don’t deserve you.” You admitted sheepishly.
JJ scoffs, and you’re not sure why. He’s often sarcastic, but it’s hard to tell what he’s really thinking in these situations.
“Are you fucking kidding me, Y/n?”
Your eyes meet his, hesitation behind them.
“You’re the one who doesn’t deserve me? Is that a joke?”
You looked at him as if it were obvious, like the line had already been drawn in the sand. This fact had already been decided; there was no going back, not now, and not ever.
“I know I’m not the smartest person, okay, but you’re making no sense.”
“Come again?” You asked, equally as confused as he was. It was incredulous for anyone to believe JJ of all people wasn’t worth it— as if he wasn’t worth someone who would go to the ends of the Earth for him, someone who would defend him six ways to Sunday. There was no one in your life more deserving of such a thing.
“Listen, Y/n...”
“No! You listen. Nobody should treat you like that. Especially our friends! As if their problems are bigger than yours or something. It’s just fucked up for any one of them to act like they don’t care because I know deep down, they do. They care just like I do but they just suck at showing it. Mostly John B. He sucks the most. And I’m not exempt either, I mean I should’ve checked on you sooner-”
“Shoulda, woulda, coulda.” JJ interrupted, placing his hands on your shoulders. “Y/n, it’s okay. I don’t need anything.”
“I know that. I just want to love you. Because I really do. I really love you, JJ. Like bad. So bad that it’s probably sad at this point but I really don’t care anymore! Not about what John B has to say, not about anything, because I’ll never regret it. I’ll never wish that I didn’t love you.”
That stupid weight again, feeling as if it’s taking off like a rocketship and leaving your conscience for good. It makes you want to scream the words from the rooftops. Over and over and over again.
Confessing feels good, but kissing JJ feels damn euphoric. His lips are on yours before you can even register what’s happening, too busy being self-aware to realize the way his eyes turned glossy, or the way he’s gently got one hand on your waist and one hand caressing your cheek.
“He’s got it all wrong. I love you, too.” JJ confesses after pulling away from you, briefly taking his eyes off yours to glance at the Chateau. His head shakes as he says it, that starry glint in his eyes so undeniably present. “So bad.”
He earns a giggle out of you as he mocked your words to him just a few moments ago. But now, things were changing. He couldn’t stand before you and pretend he didn’t feel the way he did. Not anymore, not ever again.
Not after you’d shown your love for him so confidently to everybody, time and time again. JJ Maybank wasn’t sure about many things in life, but you weren’t one of them. This was surely the best decision he’d made in years.
“Come over.” You whine between kisses, breaking him out of his trance. If you let him, he’d kiss you forever, and it still wouldn’t be enough.
JJ raises his eyebrows, smirking.
“For dinner. We’re having sloppy joes.”
JJ, unresisting temptation, leans in again and moans against your lips dramatically. “What about dessert?”
You give his hair a tug and kiss the smirk off his face, whispering to him a secret.
“And maybe dessert.”
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taglist: @ilovejjmaybank @missevi @nxsmss @cameronsrafe @msgorillagripcoochie @bibliophilewednesday @tovvaa @rudybarnes @annab-nana @reawritesthings @moniamaybank @outerbankspreferences @laneylaneylaney @jjpouggues @pogueslandia @mildkleptomaniac @whcclxr @mrs-cameron @it-was-never-meant-to-be-boys @alanniys @amourology @luversgirl + jj maybank taglist: @destourtereaux
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chelawrites · 6 months
Note
okkk max!!!!!!!!!
so the reader is a just a normal person no job that comes with fame, i think they are a artist and own their own gallery in monaco, she grew up with max and they have been best friends for ever basically max biggest soft spot and he’s the most affectionate with her, he thinks she will never return his feelings so never says anything because their friendship is more important. i’m inspired by maxs birthday today but maybe after they have a party with max’s friends and family they are still on the boat alone and reader made max his favorite cake and she sings him happy birthday just them as she has since they were friends and she ask what he wished for, he says this and kisses her :) and obviously she kisses back and he tells her what he feels and is pleasantly surprised when she’s always loved him to and was waiting for him
:)
So excited to write my first Max piece! Slowly but surely I am becoming a Max girly...and Toast is helping me along with that! 🤪 I hope you like this, love - I sure do!
TW: not proofread
Summary: After growing up together, it's only a matter of time before feelings come out...right?
Childhood Crush | Max Verstappen | MV1
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A small bell chimes as you sit in your studio, a paintbrush in hand. Taking one more glace at your canvas, you set down your brush and palette. Quickly, you try to clean yourself up; swiping away your baby hairs, checking your clothes in the full length mirror that laid against the wall – hoping your weren’t covered in paint. Walking out to the gallery side, you notice a taller guy browsing the art on the walls. “Hello! Let me know if you want any information on anything, I’ll be here.” 
The guy turns, a familiar accent coming from his lips. “I’m here about a party?” He smirks at you. Max – your longtime friend, basically from the time you were learning nursery rhymes. “How you are, Y/N? I haven’t seen you in a while, you never come out.” His legs stride towards you, stopping just before you and giving you a hug. 
Throwing your hands up in a shrug, you respond, “I’ve been in the studio preparing a new collection. You know how it goes…” 
His hand comes up to your face, brushing away at your cheek. “Bit of paint there.” Seeming to need something a little more helpful to remove the paint, he licks his thumb – returning it to your face. 
“Blegh!” You blurt, shrinking away from his soggy thumb. 
His face turns to a fake frown, “Oh hush. It’s gone now.” Wrapping his arm around your shoulder, he pulls you back into your studio – sitting you both on the sofa. “You’re welcome, schat.”
Schat – something Max would say that would make your heart twist like someone wringing out a wet towel. You grew up with both of your guys’ parents calling you that term of endearment, but it always felt different when it came from Max. The little voice in your head always told you how wrong it was to feel this way for him, but your heart begged you for more. More time with him. More sweet nothings. More…everything. You had spent hours upon hours growing up, and even now, wondering what it would be like to be his schat. 
Shaking the daydream from your head, you fill the silence. “So…you said something about a party.” 
He grabs your hand excitedly, a wide smile spreading across his face. “Well, you know my birthday is coming up,” You nod your head. Of course you knew – you don’t just forget your lifelong best friend/crush’s birthday. “I’m having a party on the boat. Friends, family, you. I think we’ll make a day out of it. You’ll come?” His eyes are saying that he’s hoping to sway you. 
You already knew you would say yes to going, but you had to make it harder than that for him. As you usually would, like old times. “I don’t know, Max. A whole day?” You shake your head. “I’ve got to finish this collection, I launch in two weeks.” All lies, the piece you were working on before Max arrived was the final piece you needed to finish, and you were practically done. He gives you puppy dog eyes, knowing it would work on you. Pretending to give in, you sigh. “I think I can make it work…just for you Maxy.” 
* * * 
You loved Monaco. You loved the sun, the people, the buildings. It all what led you to set up your gallery here, instead of back in the Netherlands where you were raised. Another thing you happened to love was the water. Luckily for you, you had a best friend who had a boat, and occasionally, you were invited on said boat. 
The day had been full of fun. Your family had come down to attend as well, catching up with you both when time allowed. When not in the water, you were sunbathing with your mother and sister, laid out on the white cushions that sat atop every seat on his boat. As the sun went down, everyone sat around a table inside – a cake being brought to Max with a practical choir signing happy birthday to him as he blew out the candles. The day had finally wound down, the boat docking to let everyone go – you however had one birthday surprise you saved for just the two of you. 
You sat on a lounge chair that was arranged with another in the boat’s lounge space, checking the paper bag you had hid all day – making sure your surprise was still there and in good shape. Hearing a sigh, your head pops up to see Max walking into the lounge. “Maxy! I have something for you…”
He rubs his hands together, his face looking as excited as it could – clearly drained from the day’s activities. “Is it an exclusive piece from your new collection? I’ve already got a wall in mind to hang it on…” 
A frown finds its way onto your face. “Sadly, no. But I hope this makes up for it?” You reach into the paper bag, pulling out a single cupcake and a pack of birthday candles. Taking the cupcake out of the box, you stick a single candle on top. “Shit. I didn’t bring a lighter…do you have one here?” Max nods, getting up to dig through a couple of drawers – eventually coming up with one and handing it to you. He sits back down on the lounge chair across the coffee table from you, a soft smile on his face. You quickly light the candle, setting the lighter next to the cupcake on the table. Clearing your throat, you begin to sing a song you both made up – many, many years ago. 
Today is the day,
It’s Maxy’s birthday. 
We scream and we shake,
Because we want cake.
Ending your singing, you continue with the tradition. “Now let’s watch this…On three, Maxy will make his wish!” You giggle to yourself, Max’s smile wide as can be before he blows out the candle atop his cupcake. You clap for him, pulling the candle out of the cupcake so he can begin to eat it. “What was your wish?” 
Swiping a bit of the frosting from the top of the cupcake, Max eats it off his finger. “Umm…this.” He stands from his chair, leaning across the table and grabs your chin pulling you to meet his lips. The sweet taste of vanilla entrancing you, pulling you out of your seat more – you wrap your arms around his neck. The kiss deepens as you surrender yourself, puzzle pieces snapping together. 
After a minute he pulls back, shock on his face. “Wait, you’re okay with this?” Nodding, you kiss him once more before he pulls away again. “I didn’t just ruin our friendship…did I?” You shake your head, which triggers a smile on his face. “Y/N…this is -” 
You put a finger to his lips, shushing him. “Max, shut up…I’ve been waiting for this moment to happen.” You laugh as you once again find his lips, the two of you moving together perfectly, as if it were meant to be. "I love you, Max."
With a chuckle, he speaks through your lips. "I love you too, mijn schat."
🤩 Taglist: @merchelsea
(Let me know if you'd like to be added to the taglist!)
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licorice-tea · 1 month
Text
You Feel Right; Stay A Sec
Pairing: Trafalgar Law x reader
Content: pining, yearning, wanting, and needing <3 no smut just fluff! kissing and smooching, just one mention of “going further”! reader is a heart pirate and likes reading :)
Word Count: 1.4k
A/N: it’s been a while since i wrote something for my man (Law <3) so i had fun with this😇☝️inspired by lyrics from the song “Hostage” by billie eilish… i love writing based on songs, it’s probably bc i have music playing 24/7 in either my headphones or on a speaker, and i just love music! so it’s easy to get inspo or create scenarios while listening to it, yk? anyway, hope you enjoy! <3
I wanna be alone
Danger around every corner, piles of work, tasks demanding his attention, and crew members in need of their captain’s opinion are all sources of constant stress for one Trafalgar Law. It’s not that he doesn’t love being a surgeon; it’s his passion, nor his crew; they’re the closest thing he has to a family now. It's just that his battery in all aspects- social, mental, physical- is constantly drained.
The only things keeping him going are steaming cups of black coffee and the rare moments of quiet before he passes out on top of his comforter. And, no matter what form the momentarily relief from life takes, it most always comes when Law is alone. He prefers it that way, anyway.
Alone with you, does that make sense?
He prefers being alone, really. Which is why nothing about you makes sense. Right off the bat, Law has felt differently around you than others. He made an effort not to show that difference in opinion no matter how strong it came to be at times.
Times like now, where sleep eludes Law despite how damn tired he is. For whatever reason, all he wants is to hold something- no, someone… you. Law wants to hold you. Or maybe you could hold him, who cares about the specifics?
Law flips on his stomach and groans into his pillow. This is new territory. He’s never wanted someone the way he wants you. A partner to hold close on nights like these, or to simply be alone with.
I wanna steal your soul
He has considered, on multiple occasions, telling you how he feels. But Law would never actually do such a thing. It would be a complicated and messy affair, surely, thanks to your positions. (His as your captain and yours as his subordinate.) And he wouldn’t want you to feel like you had to accept his confession, either.
Still… he wishes you were his, in every way a person could give themself to another.
And hide you in my treasure chest
At least you’re on his crew. You’re always nearby, should he need you, which he often does. Sometimes, Law likes to call you into his office for a made up reason. “Y/n-ya,” he’d say, “give me a rundown on tomorrow’s conditions at sea.” Though you’re not the navigator of the ship, you still know plenty about seafaring, so you’d comply. Then he’d find some other trivial matter to discuss, or offer you a new book so you could later exchange thoughts on it. Just something- anything to keep you around as long as possible. It’s so much more peaceful with you.
I don't know what to do
But how to make your role in his life a more permanent one? Law hasn’t a clue. Tonight, like many others, you sit on a couch in Law’s office. Neither of you speak, but the atmosphere is calm and comfortable.
Or it should be. Law discreetly looks your way every few minutes, then every few seconds. His eyes follow the way yours scan side to side over a page of your book. From the lines of your jaw and neck, to stray hairs falling over the curve of your cheek.
The usually undetectable tension seems to be coming to a point tonight, and Law doesn’t know how to resolve it. But he wants to, almost as much as he wants you.
So, for once in his life, he moves without much planning. Law rises from his desk and crosses the room to sit beside you. He (stiffly) puts his arm around the back of the couch. Naturally, you give him a perplexed look- it’s not like Law to suddenly reach out like this, physically or otherwise.
“Good book?”
“Yeah, thanks for recommending it.”
“For sure.”
“…Is that all?”
He nods, then pulls his hat lower over his eyes. Silently, he makes a plan to abort this failed mission.
Luckily, you stop him and take the initiative.
To do with your kiss on my neck
Law lifts his arm back off the couch and over you. But, you gently grab his wrist before he can go any farther. “Law, is there… You know you can tell me anything, right?”
Again, he simply nods. A moment of silently staring into each other’s eyes passes, and he leans forwards extremely hesitantly. Your hand moves from his wrist and tentatively rests on his shoulder. Still, Law doesn’t break eye contact (for once in his life), continuing to lean forward at a painfully slow pace. So you allow your hand to travel up to the side of his neck.
“You can kiss me.”
He nods again slightly, “I know. I- I will.”
I don't know what feels true
At long last, Law places a featherlight kiss on the corner of your lips. It’s an unsure, awkward action, but welcome nonetheless. His lips linger on yours, not quite aligned for a moment. Despite your breath being held, you allow your eyes to close and savor the feeling. You want more than this chaste kiss from him, of course, but you’d take your time with it. Law isn’t the kind of man you’d want to have a touch and go experience with. No, he’s the kind the one that you want to savor. The one that you want to take your relationship slow and steady with as he wants, and as a result get to spend even longer in his company.
When he pulls away, you can’t help but smile. Law’s parted lips close into the gentle curve of a smile as well, his usual smirk appearing much more bashful. The two of you lean back into each other. Your noses are nudged and warm breaths mingle before your lips can meet again.
But this feels right, so stay a sec
Law realizes he’s never done this before; kissing. But now, he’s hooked. He still doesn’t really know if he’s doing it correctly; if you’re enjoying the experience as much as he is, but it feels good. Therefore, he must be doing something right. Plus you only pull away from him to take breaths before immediately returning your lips to where they belong (on his), which confirms his hopes.
What started as a sweet and slow kiss ends up becoming a much hotter make out session. Months of pent up attraction and feelings for each other spill over, out of your mouth into his (and vice versa.) He’s the first to swipe his tongue across your bottom lip and get you to open up, and proceeds to groan into your mouth in a way that’s surprisingly communicative of how strongly he feels. It gets to the point where, besides your hands roaming over each others backs, you feel that your saliva must also be permanently entangled.
But all good things must come to an end. You pull back completely so that you and Law are properly facing each other, rather than within kissing range. “Law, I… We should talk about this. Before we go any farther.”
His face heats up at the implication; he hadn’t even thought that far ahead, too lost in your sweet taste, warm skin, and soft lips to do so. He nods and just murmurs, “Okay, let’s just keep doing this.”
You agree and kiss him without another word.
Yeah, you feel right, so stay a sec
When you do both finally wind down, and are left as nothing but half-sleep puddles in each other’s arms, Law murmurs something unintelligible into your hair.
Silence passes, though you can practically hear the gears in Law’s head turning. Finally, he speaks his mind. “Don’t go.”
A smile graces your features. How pleasantly surprising it is to have your captain- possibly the most closed off man you’d ever known- asking for you to stay. Of course, you hum in negation. “Wasn’t planning on it.”
His arms seem to tighten around you- though whether it’s reflexively or to keep you close, you’re unsure. “Good.” Then, Law murmurs something unintelligible against you.
“Hm?” He can feel the vibration on your lips against the side of his face more than he can hear it. That’s how closely you’re pressed into him.
Law clears his throat. “You feel right.”
“So do you.”
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hongjoongsmuse · 9 months
Text
"i wish i were heather."
TO BE A HEATHER IS TO BE BEAUTIFUL, POPULAR, WELL-LIKED AND DESIRABLE. EVERYONE WANTS TO BE, BE WITH AND BE SEEN WITH HEATHER. — hjsmuse
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june 20, 2023.
inspired by a conan gray song turned tiktok trend and term, this gender neutral tarot pac (though lyrics from the song include she/her pronouns) intends to gloss over what makes you beautiful and desirable to other people; whether it's to your best friend or a complete stranger. each reading has been conducted with the good tarot by colette baron-reid, and are each written in little paragraphs. for each reading, rose quartz was present. pictures are from pinterest. readings conducted and words written by hongjoongsmuse on tumblr. thank you all for your support on my readings ! ♡
disclaimer ! despite what some people may think, tarot is NOT a fixed fate, nor can it predict the future. tarot is merely just an act of guidance and outcomes are subject to change based on one's actions. it can be taken into consideration when making choices, but it shouldn't be taken as fact/evidence. any results you may get may vary from reader to reader depending on their own energies, intuitions, personal interpretations of the cards and the date/time the reading was conducted. if what i say is different from someone else, it doesn't mean i'm right, but it doesn't mean i'm wrong either. the same goes for any other reader, until things can be confirmed with fact.
furthermore, pac readings are not specific to one person. they are general readings, and can pick up on multiple energies. therefore, please take it all with a grain of salt, as it is not specifically tailored for anyone.
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- ˏˋ pile one ! ˊˎ-
WHY WOULD YOU EVER KISS ME ? I'M NOT EVEN HALF AS PRETTY
pile one, your energy is just beautiful. even writing this now, i felt a wave of calm. there's something so innocent and pure; a fresh and effortless beauty you may not even realize you possess. and i believe you're a heather due to your inner and outer beauty - you could have healing powers that just draw people in, because you feel like home. people know they can go to you if they need help. you're a safe place for many. yet, you're able to keep a steady mind and chase after your own goals and ambitions too. you're so mentally strong, yet so deeply emotional and intuitive. your childlike wonder and views on the world paired with your independent, maternal qualities (of course, this isn't reflective of sex or gender) is a powerful, charming combination that garners a lot of admiration and respect. keep doing what you're doing, pile one. you're ethereal, and you're truly a heather.
FOOL, LOVE, STAR, QUEEN OF EARTH, PAGE OF AIR
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- ˏˋ pile two ! ˊˎ-
BUT I WATCH YOUR EYES AS SHE WALKS BY
pile two, it took my deck ages to figure you out. you feel very mysterious, and therefore you could possess a very natural allure people just can't ignore. you carry yourself with an elegance and poise many might deem intriguing rather than intimidating - hence a lot of automatic interest about who you are as a person. whether you're aware of it or not, people do want to find out more about you. i also think you have a very whimsical/ethereal appearance? and beauty that must be seen to be believed. effortless or not, it adds to your charm and really makes you a heather. i wouldn't be surprised if many of these people end up thinking about you often, like that airport or hallway crush no one has the guts to talk to. your intuition feels very on point, and therefore you may be able to make very accurate judgements on people very quickly. i'm sure a lot more people notice and respect this than you think. you're truly a heather, pile two.
MAGICIAN, TEMPTATION, STAR, 2 OF WATER, 6 OF WATER
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- ˏˋ pile three ! ˊˎ-
BUT HOW COULD I HATE HER ? SHE'S SUCH AN ANGEL
pile three, i think you've got a real passion for living - and that's beautiful. the world is truly your oyster, you can really achieve anything you put your mind to. your creative and firey flair is noticeable by anyone, and is equally as intriguing. your energy is contagious; you make people smile more often than you think. i'm sure they think about you a lot as well. you seem to have a good circle of friends and/or connections. even if it's only a couple of people, that loyalty and bond is probably unlike most. your care and compassion for others yet your independent, confident streak is deeply admirable and very attractive. speaking of attractive, your physical appearance is without a doubt, a contributing factor to your heather status. i know you'll make it as far as you want to, my love !
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midnightcrw · 2 months
Note
would you write about how simon and his wife met? moving in together and the proposal? i like the idea of his partner proposing to him but whatever you wanna write is fine to me ilysm take care♥️
Rest
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Pairing: Simon Ghost Riley x fem!reader
Summary: Simon lets his inner child rest
a/n: Writing this made me feel insanely emotional. It has not been the best few weeks for me and I really wanted to write for this request. I have never felt loved before, which is why I focused on writing this more about Simon. Everyone deserves to be loved and cared for, which is why this one hit me a little hard, but I'm happy with the outcome. I just wanted to show a bit of an emotional side of Simon, which I was inspired by in my own one-shot, "Mama's Boy." I think the reader being a florist fits perfectly with the whole Daisy thing and Simon's past with his mother, so I went with it. I'm also incredibly sorry that it took so long to write this, but I hope that you'll like it.
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Meeting for the first time:
It was peaceful outside. The birds were chirping, while the laughter and chatter of the people could be heard. And that was usually a good thing.
Not hearing gunshots, screams, and explosions should always be good, but somehow it didn't feel that way to Simon.
It had been a week since his last mission had ended and he could go home, but it didn't feel right.
It was hard to describe. The thrill and adrenaline of the missions always kept him awake, while when he had free time, there was nothing to distract him.
And how he wished his thoughts would stop, but they never did.
His mother's birthday was coming up, and even though she was long gone, he still felt that aching in his chest. He wanted to cry and scream, but at the same time it was impossible that this would ever happen.
At the same time, he felt suffocated, but he could still breathe, and that confused him more than anything else. His footsteps took him further down the early morning street while he wasn't even concentrated on his surroundings.
He missed his mother and his family, though the memories weren't really the best, they still held his past self tightly.
Simon always hated himself, especially his younger self. He knew it wasn't his fault, but the guilt remained, almost as if it was tattooed deep into his skin, the ink seeping through every layer.
He wished there was another universe where things would be better, if not for him, then at least for those he had loved and cared about.
And without realizing it, he found himself in a small shop. And how out of place he looked.
The shop was filled with pastel colors, simple and colorful at the same time, while he could smell the different scents of the flowers he was surrounded by.
The daisies were the first to catch his eye. They were his mother's favorite flowers and he still remembered every single thing his mother used to tell him about them and how she always took a few Daisy's home with her.
Simon let out a shaky breath as he suddenly felt hot. He wasn't going to cry and he knew it. He could never cry, not even for those he loved.
"Sir, are you all right?" Hearing the soft voice of a woman, he turned his head until he met the face of the stranger standing behind the counter.
"Everything's fine," Simon rasped out, and only if he knew how much his life would change after this brief interaction.
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Moving in together:
"Simon! Did you take the box already?" Your voice echoed through the currently empty room of the house.
"I did," Simon replied as he put the box down. And with that, you nodded and made your way outside to get some of your things.
While you did so, Simon stood in your empty living room. Everything looked so empty, but he could picture it all in his mind.
He could imagine how the two of you would decorate the whole house to make it a comfortable place and somehow it made him feel excited in his chest.
This usual aching feeling in his chest was somehow much better now. It didn't feel suffocating like before, but rather a peaceful feeling.
A few years ago, he would have felt troubled to do anything outside of his job, but now it didn't feel that way anymore.
It was almost as if he was getting closer to having peace. And as if the child of himself was finally outside, enjoying the sunny weather as he ran around the field, finally smiling.
It felt like something was lifting off his shoulders and giving him room to breathe freely.
"You okay?" Your voice made itself heard as you put a hand on his shoulder and looked up at him with a worried look on your face.
Simon just nodded, unable to answer, afraid that his voice would break as soon as a single word left his lips.
And the moment a smile found its way to your lips, Simon was left breathless as the sunlight shone on your face, making you look even more beautiful.
His heart rate increased and that's when he knew he wanted to spend the rest of his life with you.
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Proposal:
The weather was fine outside as he looked out the window and saw people walking down the street with smiles on their faces.
Yet he felt restless.
Simon had never felt so nervous, and it reminded him of the time before he had met you.
The suffocating feeling returned as his heart ached, but it wasn't because he was sad or unhappy with you.
It had something to do with the weight in his pocket, and since he'd been carrying it around, he couldn't stop thinking about it.
He finally wanted to do it. To make you his and his alone and he made his decision.
Nodding to himself, Simon tried to stop his discouraging thoughts as he made his way to the kitchen, where you were currently standing, waiting for the pancake to turn out the way you wanted.
But even you were restless. You were deep in thought, but conscious enough to notice Simon as you bit your lip.
You wanted to get it out of your chest, even though you were afraid of how he would react.
Finally coming to your decision, you turned down the heat of the stove as you turned around to look at him.
And there he was, your Simon.
The man you had fallen in love with, the man your heart beat for, and the man you couldn't even imagine living without.
Breathing heavily, you encouraged yourself as you finally pulled out the small red case containing a single ring, just for Simon.
And the moment his eyes looked down to see the case, Simon's eyes widened as you opened it to reveal the wedding band.
"I-" Before you could get out a single word, Simon interrupted you with a swift 'wait' as he pulled out a case of his own.
His fingers opened the case, revealing a beautiful ring to your eyes, which became as wide as his.
Without a word, you closed the red case tightly in the palm of your hand as you threw your arms around his torso, your heart pounding furiously in your chest.
As your arms tightened around him and a small 'yes' left your lips, a single tear rolled down Simon's face.
And with that, the aching in his chest and the suffocating feeling left him as he finally felt free.
He let the troubled child inside of him rest in a peaceful sleep as he held you close to him, never wanting to let go.
Simon didn't even feel an ounce of hatred towards himself, he finally felt like he deserved something he longed for.
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meownotgood · 2 years
Text
cherry waves / hayakawa aki
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Aki is undeniably, wholeheartedly in love with you, and there's nowhere he tells you he loves you more than right here, in his bed, when you're under him.
cherry waves - deftones
all my love to @kentoangel for giving me the inspiration to make this fic!!!! ilysmmmmm!!!!!!!!!! 💗
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pairing: hayakawa aki x fem!reader
word count: 6.1k
tags: 18+, smut, fluff, fingering, cunnilingus, tender sex, overstimulation, dirty talk, smoking, established relationship, lots and lots of i love you's, soft dom aki
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this work contains explicit content intended for 18+ individuals. please read the tags and do not interact if you are a minor.
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Aki is undeniably, wholeheartedly in love with you. 
He tells you every single day. Before he goes to work, he leaves a note on the fridge: There's cash on the coffee table if you want to go out and treat yourself. Have a good day baby. I love you. :) His handwriting is neat, sleek, and formal, like him personified with pen, but when he gets to the I love you, the letters seem to become a bit messier. He scribbles them nervously, as if he feels a little embarrassed about writing it, about seeing the words on the paper, tangible and real. Regardless, you pluck the note off the fridge and keep it in your drawer, alongside the hundreds of others he's written for you. 
With his voice, he asserts it even more. When he manages to get a break at work, he steps aside to call you for as long as he can, even if it's only for a few minutes. He tells you he loves you before he hangs up the phone, says how much he misses you while admiring the polaroid of you in his wallet. I think about you every second that I'm here. I can't wait to come home to you. 
He'll profess his love in the late hours of the night, limbs tangled with yours under the sheets, while he holds you close to his chest. He litters your forehead with the lightest, most delicate of kisses, as though you're made of porcelain beneath his lips. The words are uttered drowsily, like they're heavy in his throat, and he whispers them over and over again, as if his fondness is spilling over, uncontained. You're already fast asleep in his arms by now, so his I love you's fade into the darkness, but perhaps you'll end up hearing them in your dreams. 
It slips off of his tongue again when he shares lunch with you. He takes an orange from the fruit bowl in the kitchen, peels it, pulls the pieces clean apart. There's an odd number of slices. He gives you the extra one. The citrus tastes sweet on his tongue, just as sweet as what falls from his lips. God, I love you so much, you know that? It catches you a bit off guard when he says it out of no-where, but before you can ask him where his sudden remark came from, he's shutting you up with a kiss that tastes sugar-coated. 
He's just lucky to have you. Lucky and oh-so grateful to share both his life and his love. This quiet scene, shared between only the two of you: it's simple, but he's never felt more alive. Aki is finally able to live how he's always wanted, enjoying the most mundane of moments with the one he genuinely loves, who loves him just as much. 
If he is the moon — cold, monochrome, and stormy — then you're definitely the sun, shining like rays of daybreak light and eternally warm like a summer's heatwave. In a world of devils, of heartache and the bitter taste of blood, you would be his idea of an angel. 
He's still not sure if he even deserves this, nor does he understand how someone like him got so damn fortunate. And it's cheesy, but he wouldn't trade this life for any other, or for anything in the universe. He just wishes he got the chance to meet you, to cherish you and this life, so, so much sooner. 
All he can do now is make the most of it, tell you he's in love with you in as many sentences as he can possibly fit it into, kiss you until his lips are bruising, promise you, I'll stay with you, for as long as this world will allow. Cross my heart and hope to die, my love. 
There's nowhere else he belongs but here. His arms belong wrapped around you, his lips belong on yours, he longs to be as intertwined with you as possible. There's nothing he wants to say more than your name and infinite chants of I love you, I love you, I love you. 
And there's nowhere Aki tells you he loves you more than right here, in his bed, when you're under him. The phrase is whispered in your ear, warm and true, the slightest bit shaky. "You're beautiful. Absolutely beautiful. I'm so in love with you." He says the words softly, but in your chest, they feel like the intense blaze and explosion of a sky filled with fireworks. 
A vinyl spins and spins in the humble record player, and the speakers play a song. The low music resounds in harmony with the soft pitter-patter of rain. Droplets blanket the tin roof above and then tap gently against the window. Silk curtains are pulled slightly ajar, and blurry, fluorescent lights from the city shine through fogged up glass, illuminating the dim room. 
His clothes and yours lie in a heap on the floor. He slipped off his oxfords at the door, shed his suit jacket over the couch. You loosened his tie and tossed it aside, popped each button on his dress shirt, unfastened his belt and his zipper to pull down his slacks. You reached into his hair and tugged on his hairtie until it came free from the topknot and the dark strands fell around his face. 
He pulled your pants down and off of your legs, then hooked his fingers around the waistband of your underwear. He kissed you through the fabric, grinning when your legs shivered, before taking them off, leaving you in only the shirt you were wearing.  
The album playing is one Aki picked out. The music itself is a bit grungy, maybe even a little out-of-style, but it's one of your favorite bands, and since it's your favorite, it became his too. He plays the cassette you gave him in the car when he drives, listens to the record on loop when you're gone because it always reminds him of you. 
Strands of his hair tickle your face when he places a tender kiss on your forehead, then your cheek, your jaw, and finally your lips, where he grabs your chin between his thumb and forefinger to drag you in closer. He doesn't want to pull away, and so he lingers for far longer than necessary, kissing you softly, effortlessly. 
Your arms wrap around him, and you hold the back of his head with one hand, trail your fingers down his back with the other, and trace the scars that are littered between his shoulder blades. His hands find your thighs and he grips them carefully, slowly spreading them apart. 
He pulls away to pepper your neck with kisses and playful nibbles of his teeth, his lips unable to stay off of you. His fingers trail up, under your shirt, and on your chest, below your ribcage, his fingertips trace shapes onto your skin. It tingles when he draws circles, hearts, spells out the letters of his name with a feather-light touch, wishing he could engrave them in. If he could, he'd cover every last inch of you with his own being, until there's unmistakable proof that he was there, that he's in love with you. For now, the hickeys he's leaving on your nape will have to do. 
"So gorgeous," He mutters against your skin, words muffled, breath hot. "God, I just adore you." His voice is deep, quiet, as smooth as the velvet sheets and as familiar as the guitar riff you've long since memorized in this song.
When Aki leans back, there's a faint grin on his face, and the kindest look in his eyes. Just looking into them makes you feel like you're drowning in warmth. It's hard to recall when you first met him, it feels like forever ago. His gaze was so cold and frigid then, but now, it's taken on a much softer hue. 
Aki dotes on the fact that you're wearing nothing but his own shirt. It's one of his old t-shirts that you dug out from his dresser, and it's a baggy fit, but it looks beautiful on you, he thinks. His palms glide under it, caressing your bare skin. From this view, you look stunning. The way you're laid back on his pillow, arms sprawled out with hands upturned, you look absolutely darling, like a dose of fathomable heaven. 
Your senses are filled with the smell of his sheets, his clothing, and his laundry detergent. His cigarettes, his room, just the smell of him, it makes your head spin, and you melt into the comfort and familiarity of it all. You reach up to tuck his messy hair behind his ears, fiddling with the piercings on his lobes as his hands travel down. The glint in his earrings capture the hazy glow of the city lights. 
His hands reach your hips and he holds them tight, his thumbs rubbing comforting circles on your skin. He lifts them, aligns you, takes a deep breath. His heart pounds with anticipation, but he looks to you, asks if you're ready first, and only when you nod does he continue. With a hard swallow that makes his Adam's apple bob in his throat, then a fragile gasp and whine, he steadily presses inside you. 
You're so wet from the hours Aki spent teasing you before this, and so messy from the countless times you've came already for him. The inside of your thighs are shiny and glistening, covered with the love bites and pretty bruises he left there. 
It's on nights like these where Aki not only tells you how much he loves you, but shows you. He pleasures you all night long, until you've cum over and over again for him. Until morning light starts to seep through the blinds, and you're too tired to continue, falling asleep in his arms after the waves of pleasure subside. 
Earlier, he made you cum on his fingers, one hand holding his cigarette, the other nestled between your legs. He takes a drag in from the cig, tilting his head to exhale the smoke away from you, all while his middle finger runs up and down your pussy. He gets it wet with your slick before slowly pressing it inside, all the way to the knuckle. He drags it in and out, in and out, and when you buck your hips to meet his hand, he adds another. 
His ring finger stretches you out deliciously, and once it's all the way in, you can feel the cool metal of his promise ring pressed up against your entrance. 
It rests on the base of his finger: a modest, silver band. You wear a similar one, but yours is adorned with a bright, glittering diamond. He saved all his paychecks for months, surprising you with the matching set on your anniversary. Since then, he never takes it off, his promise to be yours anchored to him wherever he goes. 
He'll replace them someday; he's going to ask you to marry him in the future, and he's already convinced himself of it. He hopes you'll take his last name. There's no-one in the world he trusts more with the Hayakawa surname than you, and no-one else he'd rather pass it on to. Giving you that piece of himself would be a blessing. 
Aki's hands are so large and so pretty, big enough to eclipse your own when he holds them, or to cup your entire face with his palm like it's what he was meant to do. And his fingers are perfect; they're so long and slender, and they feel so good as he fucks you with them. You gasp when he curls them upwards, and his lips can't help but form a smile around his cigarette. 
You're always so receptive to his touch. You still giggle every time he kisses the back of your hand or the tip of your nose. Your heart still pounds when he embraces you, when his eyes lock with yours for too long. You fall apart for him every time, just as easily as the first. 
He finds it endearing, and he can't help but want to please you more and more, give you all of his affection. He stamps his cigarette out into the ashtray resting on the nightstand, abandoning it to put his full attention on you, whispering the most divine words into your ear. 
Listen to how wet you are. It feels good, right? Tell me it feels good.
He pumps his fingers in and out to a careful, tender rhythm. He makes sure to press them in enough so that each time, you feel the cold edges of his ring. 
Oh, baby, are you close? Don't hold back, I want you to cum for me. 
Aki can feel you tightening around his fingers. He notices your breathing picking up and your body starting to tense. He drags his fingers out and brings them to your clit, where he rubs tight circles, just how you like, in the way that always brings you to the edge for him time and time again. 
That's it. You're so beautiful when you cum, sweetheart. You make me want you so bad. 
Your thighs are sore, and your whole body is trembling, but Aki holds you close while you come down. You can go one more time for me, can't you, baby? Of course, when he asks you that, the answer is always going to be yes. 
He's dying to taste you, and so he makes you cum again, on his tongue this time. He plants open-mouthed kisses on your stomach, your hips, your thighs, onto every bone, mole, and soft spot his lips can find. Raise your hips a little for me, He instructs, sliding his arms under your thighs when you do so, There you go. Can you spread your legs a bit more for me too? 
He laps up the mess, presses his tongue in, fucks you with it. The rich flavor of his cigarettes still lingers in the back of his throat, and your sweet taste combined with it makes him feel delirious. 
He buries his face between your legs, his nose nudging at your clit, and he groans into your cunt when you run your fingers through his hair and pull him in. He kisses your clit with soft lips, licks it with the flat length of his tongue, takes it into his mouth and sucks on it hard. You're so pretty, he mumbles, but you hardly hear it. Your legs wrap around his head, and he doesn't stop until you're cumming for him again. 
Making you cum, listening to your pretty moans, watching you fall apart to his touch, it gets him so hard. His dick aches, throbs ceaselessly in his briefs, leaks out where it rests thick and heavy against his thigh. His mind goes foggy with lust, and he can feel the pure and utter want for you burning in his veins, settling in the cavity of his chest.
There's something about you that always makes him want more, makes him crave you, and causes him to desire everything you're willing to let him have. It's insatiable. He wants to be inside you so bad he can hardly stand it, but honestly, he could get off on just this alone. 
He could do this all night, surely. He always puts your pleasure above his own, and he would worship your body forever, make each curve and dip into his form of a prayer, if you'd only let him. He'll make you cum as many times as you can take, and as many times as you want. Whatever you want him to do, he'll do it for you. However much you want him to give, he'll give you even more. At your request, he'd give you every last part of himself. 
But on nights like this, even when your eyelids are heavy and threatening to shut, you need more of him. You want to be closer, so even when you're spent, you always end up begging him please, Please, Aki. I want you to fuck me. He wants it just as badly, if not more, and when you ask him like that, how can he resist? He'll always give you exactly what you ask for. 
His cock is thick and so fucking pretty, a perfect stretch when he fills you up. Aki takes his time, eases into you slowly, and you savor every single inch of him. The sight of his dick pressing inside you is damn near intoxicating, and he wouldn't be able to tear his gaze away if he tried. His pupils are blown, eyes glazed over, and his lips are slightly parted, quivering. 
When he's finally all the way in, you can feel his dick in your stomach, and he groans, pulling you in even closer by your waist. He hasn't even moved yet, and his head is already spinning. He waited so long for this, ended up teasing himself just as much as he teased you, and you're so tight around his cock, the feeling might consume him. He doesn't think he'll be able to last long, but he'll try. 
"Oh, fu-uck, baby-" Aki's voice cracks into a moan as he starts to fuck you, echoing a wet sound when he rolls his hips out, then presses back in deeply. He mumbles, "You feel so amazing, I love you. God, I love you." 
Before you can tell him you love him too, his lips come crashing onto yours. He kisses you slowly, at first, but he can't help himself from wanting to indulge in you further. Your lips feel like all he could ever need as they mesh with his. Then, he's kissing you deeply, breathlessly, like he can't get enough. He sucks on your tongue, sighing when he thrusts into you. He buries his cock in deeper just to feel you moan more into his mouth. Your hands thread through his hair, holding it back, keeping it out of his face. 
Honestly, the feeling itself isn't what turns you on the most. It's knowing that he is the one fucking you, Aki's dick is inside you. Aki, whose cold exterior you broke past, whose heartache you managed to cure. Aki, who deserves so much more than what the world has given him, who is nothing like what people say about him. 
Aki, who keeps his arm linked with yours while he makes dinner, trying out new recipes to find which one you like the best. Who wipes the tears from under your eyes with his thumbs, who gives you his jacket when it's cold outside, who still blushes when your knee bumps his in public, who makes you feel completely and utterly safe with him. Aki, who kisses you just like this, like the world is going to end. 
The way Aki loves is intense, but tender. It's exhilarating, but sincere. It never fails to take your breath away, yet still feels like a home you can return to. The kind of love that grounds you, but not without allowing you to fall for him more and more. The kind of love that's purposeful in everything, because in every possible instance, you're the one he wants, and the one he needs. You, and only you. 
When he draws away from you, his lips are ghosting on yours, and he whispers it again, "I love you," voice just barely audible over the music and the downpour. He pulls back further, reaches a hand into his messy hair to brush it out of his face, then cups your cheek. You lean into his warmth, his touch. You can feel the outline of his ring, and he has a stupid grin on his face when he mumbles, "Look at you. So beautiful, and you're all mine. How did I get so lucky?" It's true, but really, he's all yours — so hopelessly addicted to you. 
Aki makes love to you softly, almost lazily. It's sweet and passionate, and gives you a chance to enjoy the atmosphere and every little detail of it all. Aki's cheeks are flushed, his eyelashes flutter, and his chest heaves with every ragged breath he takes in. His moans are loud and needy, each roll of his hips deliberate, never too hard, because he knows how to make you cum without the need to be rough. 
Every time he shoves his cock in, it sends blood rushing to his head, and with each drag out, he whines from the pressure. He's sweating, and he grabs your shirt to hastily tug it up. Not enough to take it off, just enough to expose your chest to him. 
The storm is picking up now, and the rain has grown to a loud, universal drum as it pours from the sky. The record player is still going, vinyl spinning idly as it plays the next song on the album. Aki fucks you through it, nearly to the rhythm, but he isn't paying attention to the music. He's just focused on you. The ambience is drowned out by the obscene sound of skin slapping against skin and Aki's voice in your ear. 
"So good," Aki slurs, and one of his hands grips your waist, while the other finds yours to hold it tightly, your fingers interlaced with his. "You take my cock so well." 
"Aki… I..." You stammer out, unable to say much more than that. 
"Yeah?" Aki stops completely, giving you a second to breathe. He leans in a little closer, studies your face, and quietly asks, "What is it, baby? What do you want?" 
"Want you deeper, I want you to fuck me more, please-"
"Shit," Aki sighs, clearly losing his composure for a second. He already had an idea of what you were going to ask for, but he still absolutely loves when you beg for him. He exhales a shaky breath, "Okay, baby, okay." 
Aki's pace quickens a little, and he presses his body closer to yours, desperate to get himself even deeper inside. He's gasping, finding it difficult to breathe as he fucks into you harder, with less of his deliberate movements, and more of his own desperation. He's losing control, little by little, with each thrust and each noise he pulls out of you. You wrap your arms around him, and it's like he's falling into you. 
All it took was that little bit of extra speed, shoving his cock in deeper, harder, and your heavenly moans and cries into his ear for him to be just barely hanging onto the edge. You feel good, way too good. Too perfect, and he's too vulnerable, linked inseparably with you. 
"Oh my God, I c-can't, you feel so- fuck, fucking amazing," He stammers, barely able to get the words out, moaning after every unsteady thrust into you as he begins to lose his rhythm. His high-pitched whines are a perfect contrast to the deep vibrato of his voice. "I can't, baby, I'm so close, I'm gonna cum-" 
He's trying so much to hold out, but he's so needy, and it's made evident by his moans and the love-drunk expression on his face when he leans back to look at you. His eyebrows are knitted, his lips are parted, and he's flushed red, all the way to the tips of his ears. Despite how badly he wants it, he thinks he might be able to keep going for a little while longer, but when you start begging for him to let go, to cum for you, he's done for. 
He gives you a couple more desperate thrusts before he pulls out, panting hard, and his dick throbs in his hand as he jerks it. He whines your name as his cum spills out all over your pussy, your stomach, and your thighs. All over his own trembling fingers and down his knuckles, making his hand sticky and messy. 
Aki takes a moment to catch his breath. Strands of hair stick to his forehead from his sweat and he does his best to brush them away. He glides two fingers through the mess on your stomach, then collects what drips down your thighs, before bringing them to your mouth. You open before he has to tell you to, and he smears his cum all over your tongue. You suck on his slender fingers and twirl your tongue around his whole hand, licking up every last drop. 
"That's it," Aki praises, exhaling a shaky sigh, "Such a good girl for me. You made me feel so fucking good, baby." 
You hum around his fingers in response. 
He's close to collapsing, his whole body covered in a blanket of exhaustion, but his focus is on you. He's still so damn hard, already dribbling pre-cum out all over your soft stomach. And he's still so eager to please you, still so desperate to have you. Watching you take his fingers just reignited that feeling. 
Aki takes his fingers out, and they're wet with your own saliva when he grabs your face and squeezes your cheeks. He swallows, and the way his normally resolute voice wavers implies that he's the slightest bit nervous when he admits, "I still need you." 
"I need you too. Please."
The tip of his dick is sensitive, to the point where just pressing it to your entrance makes him whine and briefly falter. He strokes up the length, trying to get himself used to the stimulation, swiping his palm over the tip to smear the shaft with his pre-cum. He doesn't want to make you wait for too long, so he brings it back to your pussy, dragging it over, getting it messy with your slick and his cum before he slowly eases back in. 
"Oh, God," Aki's head falls, and you wrap your legs around his back, tangling your fingers in his hair. You run them through close to the scalp, gently holding the back of his head, and he stammers, "S-So… It's so…"
It's so sloppy, so wet. So overwhelming, and all too much. His cock slides in and out with ease, and he fucks into you as much as he can possibly handle without falling apart at the seams. Your thighs are soaked, his dick is unbelievably messy, and the wet sound echoed each time he shoves himself in is so damn loud. 
"Babydoll, I'm-" Aki mumbles, but he's unable to finish his sentence, breaking into a string of pathetic whimpers. He feverishly gives your neck open-mouthed kisses as a way to shut himself up. 
The overstimulation is already starting to get to him. His legs are weak and shaky, threatening to buckle under the weight of each thrust into you. His dick is so goddamn sensitive that he can hardly handle this, and yet, he can't stop. The only thing running through his brain, through every nerve in his body is that he needs you, he needs this. He grabs your face with his hand and you hook your arms around his neck to pull him in, your lips clumsily connecting with his. 
Aki moans into your mouth as he kisses you, and mutters an I love you that slurs off of his tongue when yours swirls around his. The taste of himself on your mouth has him reeling, and he can't stop himself from rutting his hips into you hard. When he pulls away, there's drool dripping down his chin, and he wipes it hastily with the back of his hand. 
With his head in such a blur, he ends up telling you every little thought that enters into his mind. "Feels so g-good… So warm… Really w-wet, ah-" 
God, you just love him when he's like this. So fucked out and drunk on you he can hardly speak, his head so cloudy all he can think about is how you're making him feel. It's a side of him only you get to see; he's cold and serious with everyone else, but he's got a soft spot for you. The truth is, even when it seems like he's the one in control, you're the one who's held all the power over him from the start. You always have. 
You can leave hickeys on his neck that all his co-workers will see, scratch up his back with your fingernails until they leave red streaks across his skin, touch him anywhere and everywhere you please because he's yours to touch. Play with his pretty cock all you want, until he's pleading with you to let him cum, to give him more because he needs it. You can stuff his own tie in his mouth to keep him quiet, wrap your hands around his throat while you ride him. And he'll love every second of it, pure devotion reflected in the gaze he can't seem to keep off of you.  
He'll let you do anything you want to him, and he'll give you anything you ask for. Especially when he's this overwhelmed, drowning in his own pleasure. And if there's anything you want right now, it's to watch him lose his mind for you. 
So when you tell him to fuck you deeper, harder, pleading, Don't you dare stop, not even for a second, he'll do just that. When you tell him to kiss you, bite you, he does, placing hurried pecks over every inch of your face, leaving impressions of his teeth on your neck and shoulders. And when you tell him to keep talking to you, praise you, I want to hear your voice, his words are incoherent and breathless, but he stammers them all the same, and without a second thought. 
"Love you… I… A-Ah, it's-" Aki manages, trying to form something complete, but failing every time. His breaths are quickened and his chest is heaving when he begs, "Please," although he's not sure what he's even begging for. Tears prick at the corners of his eyes, and beads of sweat drip down his forehead. It's too much, but he needs you so badly he can't quit. He's desperate to feel you cum on his cock. 
Your legs are still wrapped around him, secured at the ankles. You glide your hands up his chest, then to where his collarbones jut out. Over his shoulders, up to his jawline, then down again to squeeze his arms. He's pretty, so pretty, the prettiest boy you've ever seen. 
He can feel you tightening around him, and can tell your moans are picking up as he fucks you. His thrusts are shallow; he needs the friction, but also longs to stay deep inside you. He's dizzy, seeing stars, and even though he's so overwhelmed that he's not sure if he can handle cumming again, a familiar knot starts forming in his gut. He chokes out, "C-Close." 
"Me too," You reply, "Want you to cum for me, fill me up, please, Aki-" 
There's no way, absolutely no way he can resist that. Between you begging for him and the way you say his name, he's done for. He'll always give you just what you want. 
The tension snaps, and Aki grabs your waist and pulls you closer to him, fucking you through his orgasm, filling you with his cum. He cums so hard, so loud, so desperately, his muscles tightening, his dick throbbing in your stomach, all while he whines your name and a mix of disjointed, endless I love you's. 
His thrusts become messy, unrelenting, and he doesn't stop, not when it sounds like he can hardly breathe, or when his whole body is trembling. Before he collapses onto you, he wedges a hand between your legs, his fingers rubbing tight circles on your clit. The feeling is one of utter euphoria, and it's enough to bring you to the edge. You slur his name over and over again as you finish, saying it in ways that make his heart flutter and swell in his chest. 
He slows when you're finally spent, his voice in your ear hoarse, but gentle, words spoken under his breath. "That's it, cum on me, baby. Just like that... Oh my God...."
The record has long since stopped by now, and the rain still falls, but nowhere near as hard as before. It creates an air of silence, and you're suddenly aware of your own heart in your ears, and Aki's heavy breaths, his swallows and meager gasps for air. His weight pins you to the mattress, and he pulls out incredibly slow, wrapping his arms around you to hold you even closer to himself. He smells of sex and sweat, of lingering smoke and a cozy familiarity. 
"You okay?" He asks, finally managing to catch his breath, whispering into the shell of your ear. 
"Yeah, yeah. I'm okay." 
"I love you so much. More than I could ever find a way to express," Aki sighs, taking your hand into his own, "You're the best thing that ever happened to me." 
You give a little half-hearted chuckle, and then you reply, "I love you too. So much." 
Aki pushes himself up a little to meet your gaze. His cheeks are covered in a rosy blush, and when your free hand comes to cup his cheek, he holds it there, his fingers tenderly rubbing circles into your knuckles, brushing over the curve of your ring. 
He smiles, softly, warm enough to melt fresh snow, and the bridge of his nose crinkles ever-so slightly. After a moment of hesitation, he asks, "You tired, baby?" 
You nod, eyelids heavy, your whole body weak and weary. Aki leans in, and you can feel his smile against your lips when he kisses you. He holds it, keeping his lips on yours for far longer than he needs to, like he always does. When he pulls back, he whispers, "Let's get you ready for bed." 
Aki gives you as much time as you need to rest, and when you're ready, he tugs your shirt over your head and carries you to the bathroom. He showers with you, lets you lean on him while he washes your hair, and kisses every inch of your skin while you both relax under the hot water. He dries you off, helps you get dressed, kisses the tip of your nose, asks if you're hungry. You say that you're not, but he offers to make you something anyways, and for his cooking, you can't refuse. 
When the two of you finally sink back into bed, Aki holds you close. His shape fits to yours perfectly, like two halves of the same whole. You can feel the metronome of his heartbeat thrumming in his chest. His hand grabs yours, absentmindedly, like the way magnets are pulled together, destined to find one another. 
"I have the day off tomorrow, what would you like to do, baby?" He asks as he plays with your hair, twirling strands around his fingers. 
"Mmm…" You feign thinking, but really, you're just trying to fight off your ever-growing sleepiness. "Can we go shopping?" 
"We can go wherever you'd like. You wanna go out to eat, too? We haven't in a while." 
It's because your cooking is so good, You think, but you answer with a nod so light you're hardly sure if he even noticed. He places a kiss on the crown of your head and replies, "Alright, we'll go somewhere nice." 
In your head, you imagine how the day with him tomorrow will go. Aki will slip out of bed to make breakfast as silently as possible, careful to avoid stepping on the spots that make the floor creak. You'll wake up to the smell of coffee brewing, to breakfast in bed. Aki will take you to the stores he knows you love, the ones that have the clothes you always say you feel the best in. He'll take you out to the restaurant you never ask for, because you know it's too expensive, but he secretly knows it's your favorite. And of course, he'll pay for everything. 
You begin to fall asleep as the scenes play out in your mind, melting into the lull of his soft breathing and the warmth of his arms. 
Aki's voice is drowsy when he asks, "You still awake?" 
There's no response, so he pulls you closer, holds you safely, presses your head to his heart, and tells you one last, I love you. 
And when he drifts off as well, he'll love you still, wholeheartedly. Even in his dreams, then until he breathes his last, and when he does, he's sure he'll continue to love you in the lifetime after this one. 
I'll love you as much as my heart can take. Cross my heart and hope to die. 
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kittyldpdl · 3 months
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end of yr iwtv fic recs...
...as someone who demands lou gets the princess treatment in order for me to consider something worthwhile reading<333 won't b mentioning anything i've rec'd here in order to keep this list somewhat manageable & am putting it under a read-more cos im a wonderful person who respects yr dash (aka it's long) . love you all enormously and am so grateful for the wonderful writing that graced the tag in 2023, endlessly excited for what 2024 will spark. go and tell yr fave iwtv fan creator (fic, art, amv, etc...) that u appreciate them today and start the year off right !!!!
Abide for Forever by Lovelyy_Pastel (PastelLovelyBlue) [@salmoncakepls]
[complete, M, tags: armandlou, leslou, lesmand, loumandstat
i wish someone had been recording my reaction the day i was asked to read over this because the way i jumped in glee would have been comical . one of the few entries into delectable loumandstat fics with a equal interest in all of their individual dynamics, which provides the work with so much depth. the prose fits its genre, and yet completely subsumes genre conventions to create something wholly original and enchanting.
'Maybe it was meant to be like this. The dragon, the princess and the foolish prince --all trapped together in the tower. He could work with that.'
a holy love by dirtygoldensoul [@shewhomustbecalledking]
[complete, E, tags: armandlou]
i’ve returned to this fic so many times both while it was updating and now that it’s finished: it really does have everything you could ask for and i’m so grateful that it exists. if louis doing yoga out on the balcony in an attempt to honeytrap his long-term ex-lover doesnt get you to click youre too far gone i fear.
'A sliver of moonlight bathes half of Armand’s face, giving one half of his brown skin a ghostly tint to contrast to the other. He resembles something inhuman; a two-faced creature of an untold myth carved from marble by the hand of a deity and sent to torment wayward humans in the most spectacular fashion.'
A Special Kind of Longing by TheeVampyPrince [@thevampprincex]
[complete, E, tags: armandlou]
i legitimately felt so entirely crazy when this dropped in the tag. a delectable insight into louis’ relationship to parenthood and maternity through a simulated pregnancy, with perfect perfect perfect armandlou and lou getting his tits sucked on which is. Yeah. yeah. i would do anything for a follow-up.
'Armand disappeared for no longer than a second, returning swiftly to Louis’ side to wipe him down with a warm, damp towel. He took his time like he always did, like another ritual, moving from fingertip to fingertip, ceremoniously cleansing Louis from head to toe, for if I do not wash you, you have no part with me, and Louis and Armand were connected in ways that could not be spoken . At his feet, Armand paused, kissing each heel as the Turkish cotton glided over Louis’ skin. Once cleansed, Armand pulled Louis’ feet in his lap and pressed his fingers into the muscle, gently massaging them.   /   To ease the swelling.'
Babyfather by nlbv [@nlbv]
[complete, T, tags: claudia&louis]
beautiful, captivating, gorgeous, awe-inspiring, lyrical. what can anyone say about babyfather? a snapshot into louis’ first moments into parenthood with claudia joining their baby, told through the extended metaphor of bringing one’s baby home from the hospital for the first time. it is a stunning look into both louis and claudia individually, as well as the love and care involved in their relationship. i cant recommend this highly enough.
'New baby smell. Impossible, but there it was. This is the craziness that takes new parents, he told himself, trying and failing to restrain the seizing joy in his chest. Pure love. The strongest thing he’d ever felt. It was as though he’d unknowingly been carrying around a void deep inside him, and suddenly the hole had been filled. Like he’d been looking for her his whole life, always seeking and never finding, never even knowing what he’d been searching for.'
belle epoque by ldpdl [@dwreader]
[complete, T, tags: jonah/louis, louis&paul]
belle epoque fills the void that is the figure of louis’ father in the show, taking us through the days following his death all the way up to his funeral. the de pointe du lac family’s grief and confusion is palpable throughout and louis' realisation that he is to step up and take the role of the family breadwinner is heartwrenching, made all the moreso during his final conversation with tom anderson, leading us into the louis we meet in ep1.
'The funeral was held at one o’clock sharp at St. Augustine’s, the pews filled up with distinguished members of the community to pay their respects to a man who had demanded respect when he was alive, men who now turned their prying eyes to the deceased man’s son as he eulogized his father. The new boy king. A child in a toy crown.'
Body Open as a Wound by feedingicetothedog [@feedingicetothedog]
[complete, E, tags: armandlou]
this work impeccably understands the fascination in loving and knowing someone completely, and wanting to be closer still. armand takes the role of lover and caretaker with willingness and ease as they prepare for a blood transfusion to achieve true symbiosis. i think every fic that calls lou kitten deserves hundreds of awards
'Sometimes he fantasized about draining Louis to the point of death and then feeding it back to him, filling Louis with the amalgamation of their blood until it was impossible to distinguish whose had been whose. A simulacrum of the Dark Gift, of turning and creation. Every so often Armand would feel a dull ache that he had not made Louis and that Louis had not made him, that they were not one consummate organism, both simultaneous originator and progeny for the other. It seemed profoundly unfair.'
breadwinner by baberainbow [@baberainbowao3 on twitter!]
[complete, E, tags: leslou]
thank god for baberainbow blessing the leslou tag honestly . nola-era leslou fics that are as well-written as breadwinner instantly have my heart and soul in their hands and thats without even taking into account that this fic has louis angrily riding lestat and calling him stupid. God bless!!!! #lovewins! 
'“Even if you’re angry at me or even come to hate me, you must kiss me goodnight. Every night, without fail,” Lestat started. “And you must kiss me goodbye whenever you head out whether it be to hunt, to go read on our bench, or to tend to your saloon. Even if I end up leaving with you.” He hadn’t expected such words to make his gut coil so, to make him want to weep, to make him want to bundle Louis to him so tightly as though they’d merge together as one. He meant every single word.'
bruise pristine by serpentskirts [@knifeeater]
[complete, E, tags: lesmand]
there is nothing that i can say about serpentskirts’ prose that would adequately describe how magnetic it is: hypnotizingly disorientating, labyrinthian, perhaps, but even that doesnt come close. bruise pristine walks the fragile line of an even fragiler relationship with outward ease and never stumbles.
'It shines slate-blue on the rough stones of the tower, makes it slippery under the soles of Lestat's feet. The droplets suspend for a moment like diamonds, as both of them hang in the air. Brambles and tree limbs break against their bodies and then the ground meets them, bends under the force of their impact. Arms come around Armand and it becomes hard to tell which ones belong to him and which to Lestat, leg around his torso, elbow in his gut, the mud cold beneath them every time a turn brings him back around to the earth. They slam into a stone jutting up from the earth, its moss-covered surface rough against Lestat as Armand finally locks his arm around his neck. He brings it up, hard, feels the choke as Lestat is held in stasis beneath him. The sparse, lagging blood of a sick man coursing through Lestat's veins despite it all still carries that faint song, reaching across a century of strain.'
Burial Rite by weathermood [@weather-mood]
[complete, E, tags: armandlou]
an absolutely fascinating look on the realities of life set against the prospect of immortality, and what it takes to contend with that. for louis, it is three years underground. this fic follows armand’s near-ritualistic preparations for the endeavour and is a loving coda to armandlou’s relationship.
'This isn’t penance for loving me, is it? Armand wanted to ask. But he didn’t ask. Because Armand already knew it was part of it, Louis’s love for him never without the undercurrent of the guilt. Guilt that made arguments flare up over things that weren’t really about what they were arguing about, Louis just needing to bloodlet it, needing an outlet for it. Armand needed to find a way to ease it in Louis and Armand hadn’t found it yet. Louis pressed close to him and Armand wrapped an arm around Louis.'
care for me (beyond idolization) by princessxio [@princessxio]
[complete, E, tags: leslou]
princess please return to us we need you so bad the leslou game hasnt been the same since this dropped. drunken sex, leslou daddy kink, cockdrunk negotiations over surnames. It's all legitimately evil and delectable. what more could anyone ask for?!
'He can’t help but look on fondly as he watches his husband stumble toward him, clumsy in a way he never is. He then makes a note to engrave this moment in his brain when Louis spots him from the sidewalk and beams.   /    Louis’ enthusiastic greeting (“hi, baby”) is quickly overshadowed by Brick’s exclamation of “Lestat, take this man home, y’hear? He don’t need to be nowhere near decent society right about now.”'
catacomb by baberainbow [@baberainbowao3 on twitter!]
[complete, E, tags: leslou, armandlou]
the answer to my favourite baberainbow fic used to change constantly with each new update and still often does, but i think i can say without hesitation that catacomb is the fic that i return to most often. it’s a completely innovative and entrancing take on claudia&louis’ journey to paris and how louis reconciles both with the murder of lestat and falling in love with armand, all underpinned by the most gorgeously sick and twisted prose ever. 
'“I haven’t had him in years. I oughta have filtered him out, used whatever was left of him all up.” Louis murmurs to him, then scoots in and clutches him. “I’ve gotta have cycled him out by now. It’s only you filling me. You’re more my maker than him.”   /    Armand’s eyes flicker over his face, lip upturned slightly as if astonished, suspended in his admiration by a sense of reverence. “Oh, Louis,” he sighs fondly, and his name sounds like a rich red rose petal floating wayward to the ground. Louis wants to pluck his own name from Armand’s tongue and eat it and lick his fingers clean after.    /    “I’ll be your firstborn,” Louis insists, spreading his legs.'
Come Home to Me by BlaccLotuss [@blacclotusss]
[complete, T, tags: jonah/louis, claudia&louis]
blacclotuss we owe you the world for filling not only the jonah/lou tag but also for all of the claudia&lou moments in this piece! you can feel louis’ love for her with every word and i adored the inclusion of the typed letter at the beginning of the work. 
'“Claudia…Claudia…my Claudia .”   /   “I missed you, mama.”'
come sit in my lap & breath, held by flowerplots [@enterprisery]
[complete, E, tags: armandlou]
both fics, the first during their paris years, the latter after it, are gorgeous pieces exploring armandlou’s relationship and its proximity to control, always supported by flowerpots’ beautiful prose . gasped and had to cover my eyes many, many times during breath, held. highly recommend.
'Claudia will hate the clothes he’s gonna have to put on just as much, seeing as they’re clearly Armand’s – slightly too big on Louis, and so luxurious they might as well have a big “A” embroidered on them – but he puts them on anyway, guiltily relishes the way they make him feel. Likes the thought of visibly being Armand’s, though he won’t admit it. Not yet.'
dreaming put to shame by verseau [@downstairsbar]
[complete, E, tags: leslou]
this fic is so. Woah. verseau’s lestat is the most accurate in the world i fear and my hands start shaking every time i get a notif cos Lord knows what louis is going to get put through this time. the most recent chapters of reformation have also been absolutely spellbinding, with chapter nine as a focus-in on claudia&the family in the time after her adoption being a personal favourite
'No, Louis expects and offers just as much as the tongue should, the coy words clumsy enough as to pretend innocence, the way he lets Lestat’s advances and lingering hands hang in the air in perfect omission, that sweet pre-modernist Catholic paganism wherein the thought doesn’t matter unless you name it aloud, or even the secrets he reveals to Lestat in the books he recommends, the authors he latches onto, the Giovanni’s Room translations he chose for the midterm. It is impossible to imagine Louis stuck in a profession with as little love of language as business. No, Louis’ talent is best saved for such a discipline as this.'
Equity by weathermood [@weather-mood]
[complete, E, tags: armandlou]
one of the things i enjoy most about weathermood’s writing is their ability to take an au and apply their dynamic of choice to it entirely. armandlou thrives within this universe of findomming (literal genius hours) and the precariousness of newfound affection. and, of course, louis’ constant princess treatment won me over.
'Louis was formulating what mask to wear for this engagement, what performance was required of him for Armand, and it was fascinating to watch. Louis watching Armand and himself watching Louis as they read each other. Seeing himself through the minds of mortals was always interesting. It helped make Armand make sense of himself, sometimes, how they slotted Armand into context.'
firecracker by baberainbow [@baberainbowao3 on twitter!]
[complete, E, tags: leslou, claudia&louis&lestat
it feels mute to say that the characterisation in firecracker is impeccable, because of course it is, it’s a baberainbow original, but firecracker got me particularly bad cos i’ve been begging for more of their claudia since the notorious roadkill-drop-day and this set my brain aflame. it strikes a perfect balance of familial domesticity and marital sweetness without ever sidelining claudia and i can only pray every night before bed for more baberainbow claudia!!
'“Isn’t this nice?” he needles, pouring a hefty serving of blood into the teacup he’d placed on Louis’s side table and then placing the bottle down to go change himself.    /    “Honey,” Louis reminds, softly as it is pointedly. Lestat circles back to whirl the cup around until the handle’s facing Louis for an optimally convenient reach. “Thank you.”'
glass by serpentskirts [@knifeeater]
[in progress, E, tags: armandlou]
glass is the craziest thing i’ve ever read i adore it beyond words. formatted against the formation of glass itself, it follows louis during his years in san francisco with a focus on the body - and particularly the idea of a vampire’s body and what that is and can be - with all of its organicity, and lack thereof, in order to explore what louis is left with in the years after paris.
'And then, Armand hand curls, transforming into a fist that drags against his insides, wrings the last of Louis senses out of his head. What he is, a container for the small head that carves a space for itself, precious so precious as it invents new dimensions that go beyond comprehension, beyond what a body could hold. Concentric circles break around each other, pushing himself outward with being filled, by flesh and bone and presence and Louis doesn’t care anymore, lets Armand wash into him where he’s opened up, wouldn’t care if the magnitude of Armand’s mind might subsume and annihilate his own, craves it, yearns for it, lets the softening of himself draw it inwards.'
heavy empty by wayunderground [@come2coffin]
[complete, E, tags: leslou]
this fic is sooooo entirely way too crazy. lestat slips with ease into the role of man of the house and his metaphorical (Well….) role as louis’ father and creator and it has all of the unmistakably fragile antagonisms of leslou’s relationship that i love to see depicted in fics. i still really don’t know how to talk about this piece because its so crazy that my brain switches off so everyone just has to trust me and rest it i fear. 
'The thumb slipped in and rubbed purposefully on his tongue for a moment before Lestat bent his neck down slightly and opened his own mouth so that a stream of blood fell and splashed onto Louis’ welcoming tongue and down his throat. It was better this way, all his senses filled with Lestat and blood, and only Lestat and blood. Louis allowed himself to indulge in the moment, and stared up at Lestat as the blood continued to flow. It was a horrendous sight, Lestat with his pupils blown wide, no doubt getting some sick satisfaction at feeding Louis like he was a baby bird. Pleased with himself for making Louis eat whilst establishing himself further as his only need, and a better father. Louis’ real Daddy had never spit food into his mouth.'
He's inside me, he takes out my insides, he sews me up. by Lovelyy_Pastel (PastelLovelyBlue) [@salmoncakepls]
[complete, E, tags: armandlou]
only partially biased when talking about this piece because lou slasher final girl references always set my brain aflame so this was a 10/10 from the moment i saw that line (lie: it was a 10/10 the moment i saw the trans ldpdl tag) . this piece’s unique authenticity makes it impossibly captivating: it turns the predispositions about love on its head and makes violence and sharp edges a thing of devotion and care. masterful
'Sometimes it’d be done with his nails. The very talons of a monster, a lover, a surgeon, a destroyer made Louis feel completely as though he was truly inside him. He never knew when it’d happen. With the knife he was simply  mocking every villain--both fictitious and real--that held that sort of weapon. With the scalpel he had studied up on surgeries of every kind to make the experience as accurate as possible. However, his nails--his hands…the very things that make a monster a monster , a vampire a vampire , Armand Armand.'
the hour of lead by boltcutters [@dictee]
[complete, M, tags: claudia&louis]
respectfully i can’t talk at length about this piece at present. i’ve written and deleted a thousand comments but none feel adequate enough to describe how truly wonderful and heartbreaking this piece is a coda to claudia’s character and her relationship with her mother and lestat.
‘She had never believed in God beyond a bedtime story Louis told her; she had no cause as a human and less as an immortal monster. But now she thought maybe there was something there. A God who kept his subjects entangled in a garden only as nurturing as they were obedient. Man made to worship Him on his knees and woman an afterthought, sprouted from a needless bone to keep man busy. Why else had the sheer stupendous force of her hatred not struck Lestat down? Why else could he take to the sky like a bird, when she, Claudia, who had all the reason in the world to fly away, who prayed for it with all her might, sat clipped and docile and caged? Tucked in luggage compartments, folding herself smaller in the space between the library walls. No place in the world she could walk free. Little girl, little devil. What was her little, brittle body made for if not flight? It could only be someone on his side, a cruel Creator for whom her Maker was the perfect emissary. An angel. She had been right the first time.’
House by baberainbow, disintegrations, gaypiratedivorce, nlbv, serpentskirts, vampdf, weathermood [@baberainbowao3 on twitter, @dlsintegration, @diasdelasombra, @nlbv, @knifeeater, @weather-mood]
[complete(/or is it?), E, tags: leslou, claudia&louis&lestat, armandlou]
it was truly such an honour to write for house alongside some of my favourite writers. watching the rooms form and lead into one another was an experience like nothing else and to have such astounding writing involved from all parties makes my heart beam with pride when i see my name next to its title, so don’t be scared, come and visit the house.
'The House has been waiting for you.'
i am amazed by peace by boltcutters [@dictee]
[in progress, E, tags: armandlou]
dyke armandlou everybody lets cheer!!!! #lovewins !! this fic, and all of boltcutters’ fics, writes about louis with a visible love and within only the single chapter released, both armand&louis are such fully realised characters and i am biting my fist in anticipation of the second chapter.
‘Lou’s makeup was well and truly ruined now. She was exquisite like this, Armand thought. Tights bunched around her knees, plain cotton panties shoved to one side (it was such unassuming underwear, Armand smiled). Shoes still on, blouse at her elbows, like the translucent membrane of a rare and luscious fruit. Radiant debauchery. Armand wished she could take a picture. She would have tried to remember it, to paint later, if she’d thought for a moment that she could do Lou justice.’
in the delta breeze [dare to breathe] by southernhummingbird [@blueiight]
[complete, T, tags: louis&benjamin]
an entrancing look into both louis and benjamin’s life, as the latter nears the end of his, that had tears pricking at my eyes while i was reading. we are introduced to a louis that has been shaped by the years of his immortal life and is now left to reconcile those with what is left of his mortal life, namely, his last connection to his sister and the pointe du lac family. it is a divine snapshot into louis’ life and one that i don’t think the showrunners could have written half as emotively if they tried.
'The weight of years added something distinct; the wrinkly hands and light-blue cataracts dusking his brown eyes reminded Louis of his own grandfather. The way Papaw carried himself, and those cataracts… That’s all he could remember of him after all. Benjamin had that quaint serenity of his. Was that something distinct in old age? Or was it something the du Lac family held in spades: the ability to look upright even as your roots were torn asunder?'
I saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus by meastyeyes [@meastyeyes]
[complete, T, tags: claudia&louis&lestat, leslou]
a beautiful snapshot of one of claudia’s first christmases spent with louis&lestat and her excitement is near-infectious throughout the piece. we are guided with ease through claudia’s new rituals upon settling into her life at rue royale, her writing, and a louis who is clearly enraputed by his newfound parenthood. just beautiful.
'At the top of the stairs, she tip-toed across the hallway back to her room, a habit left over from when she was human, because it was quite possible to walk noiselessly as a vampire. Uncle Les said it was important for a vampire to move quietly and sneak up on people when looking for a meal.'
like a heathen clung to the homily by thelioncourts [@thelioncourts]
[in progress, E, tags: leslou, dm, armandlou, jonah/louis]
each chapter of homily opens onto a q&a-style entry, all of which are answered by louis with an astute look into his relationship to sex. from the first one, i was immediately wrapped up in the louisness of it all and knew that i was in safe hands when it came to reading homily, and i cheer every time i get a notification about this piece. from the gorgeous prose, to some of my favourite jonah/lou passages ever, homily is a breath of fresh air and an innovative take on the iwtv universe.
'“Louis,” Jonah said. His voice was thick, like he couldn’t get the air back fast enough, like he was okay drowning. “Louis, I’ve wanted to do this before I even knew what this was. I,” he paused to suck in a breath. “I mean it when I say that there ain’t nothing in this city better than your smile. Makes me want to do crazy things.”'
Lunacy by The_Lame_Goat [@iwtvdramacd18]
[in progress, E, tags: leslou, armandlou]
lunacy is quite literally everything to me. as established, lestat is literally a dog wearing skinned human and so the most innovative place to go from there is werewolfisms, and Jesus.. lunacy goes there. every word down to the title choices for each chapter are purposeful and striking and louis’ vulnerability amongst this den of hungry wolves is palpable . claudia’s introduction changed my life . i pray each night for lunacy to never end
'Lestat coaxed Louis to the bed with playful nips at his earlobe, under his jaw, his shoulder. He trembled like prey, skin raised in sweaty, delicious goose flesh. Rabbit tender this one, Lestat counted his lucky stars he was far enough from the moon to give in completely. Louis was a vision, his pretty neck arching back to bare itself and the collarbones beneath it; Lestat took the invitation readily. Peeling clothes away was as natural as skinning an animals hide, underneath both the flesh was soft and sensitive and blood-flushed and delectable.'
my neck, her rope by themasterletters [@devotiondroid]
[complete, M, tags: leslou]
inspired by carol ann duffy’s ‘warming her pearls’, my neck, her rope is a triumph of fiction, let alone just iwtv fic . told entirely in second person, it provides a succinct and heartbreaking look into the leslou marriage, with both lestat&louis entirely realised and beautifuly characterised without a name ever being put to page.
'Sometimes you will think the master does understand, and that’s why he behaves the way he does. Sometimes it will feel as if you are colluding with him in his obsession, that you are feeding it with your own, that you, in your servitude in this house, have made yourself part of the reason that she doesn’t go out often and doesn’t eat much. Sometimes you will feel as if it is your duty as one who loves her to free her from this place. But you are just a woman, and so is she.'
The Night After by wouriqueen (MaggieBrown) [@wouriqueen]
[complete, T, tags: claudia/charlie]
the night after is a heartwrenching piece following claudia on the night of charlie’s death and, as readers, we are forced to bear the full brunt of not only her justifiable grief, but the subsequent torment of being forced to clean up charlie’s remains by those who were supposed to protect her. a beautiful installment in the universe of claudia-centric works and one that i hold close to my heart.
'He’d never liked following her rules. He stood there at the threshold, one foot in the room, forcing her to extend her consciousness beyond her own pain for the first time in twenty-four hours, because apparently she couldn’t even have that. Mourning shroud yanked away. Claudia wanted to object, yet she found that only silence filled her mouth. The words were buried too deep down her throat, some still blurry at the edges, undefined and therefore unspeakable, and others too big to get out.'
overlords by gaypiratedivorce & dirtygoldensoul [@diasdelasombra & @shewhomustbecalledking] 
[in progress, E, tags: leslou, armandlou, danlou]
inspired by gillian flynn’s sharp objects, this fic is a masterclass in characterisation with an astute examination into both leslou’s marriage and claudia’s place as an adoptee within the family unit. chapter four killed me and brought me back to life seven different times.
‘God, he never wants Claudia out of his sight. He wishes she still were the little girl he met a decade ago, a doll made to fit in his arms. But Claudia is no longer a child, and she doesn't take well to sitting pretty on a shelf. Louis doesn't know how to keep her safe. Slowly but inevitably she's growing into a young woman —he knows that. And yet. She's still his little girl, and he wants to protect her from any danger.’
paragon by thelioncourts [@thelioncourts]
[complete, E, tags: leslou]
paragon is everything that louis deserves. i say often that my beautiful girl deserves nice things to happen to her always, but paragon is proof that he would hate that. divine prose, with leslou perfectly in character and louis getting dick so good she almost cries. i think it’s clear why i return to this piece so often.
‘Lestat met him the rest of the way, knowing what Louis needed, knowing what they both needed, and he wrapped one arm around Louis’ small waist, pulling him closer, and he wrapped the other arm around Louis’ shoulder, his hand finding Louis’ throat. He closed his fingers around the expanse of it gently, staying carefully still, and then slowly he pulled Louis all the way down.   /   Louis’ head dropped back with a sigh, rolling on Lestat’s shoulder as Lestat’s cock sunk the rest of the way inside of him.   /   “You’re so full of me,” Lestat said against his ear. The arm around Louis’ waist moved, sliding from his far hip to his stomach, pressing down. “I bet I can feel myself right here.”’
quicksilver by themasterletters [@devotiondroid]
[complete, M, tags: danlou]
quicksilver is one of the most extraordinary pieces i’ve ever read (and have read a couple dozen times over by now). a beautiful exploration of the noir genre, of love and heartbreak, of daniel being pathetic and lou being the most beautiful most perfect girl in the world
'Daniel wondered for the thousandth time what kind of man she was married to. Daniel hadn’t been able to wait til she took his name, til he could introduce her as Mrs. Molloy, til people were calling her Mrs. Molloy in public, til she signed Mrs. Daniel Molloy on her checks, drawing from a bank account he’d keep full for her. He couldn’t wait to claim her in every way possible. What kind of man wouldn’t feel the same?'
reply by baberainbow [@baberainbowao3 on twitter!]
[complete, unrated, tags: leslou]
reply is one of the most creative pieces in the iwtv tag. told through emails sent between a demoted talamasca agent and their supervisor, it gives both an entrancing look into (one of) leslou’s potential honeymoon(s) and these two OCs who have the craziest dynamic ever.
'Btw yuo dont need to watch them fuck you know. we know they fuck. we have files on files on files of evidence of this.'
rhododendron by southernhummingbird [@blueiight]
[in progress, unrated, tags: armandlou, leslou]
rho is simply breathtaking. one of the most original and exciting stories in the entire tag and it implores such unique and intriguing methods of telling that story. im constantly on the edge of my seat and rereading to discover new details or to take in the beauty of its writing again as we’re force to watch with baited breath through louis being hunted once again.
'Sweet and irresistible you are, if you want to keep a tomb, I can decorate a most splendid one for us both in the Underworld.'
Shallows by nlbv [@nlbv]
[complete, E, tags: leslou]
i truly don’t know what there is to be said about shallows that would compare to just begging everyone to just read it. set during ep6, it’s a heartbreakingly real depiction of the state of leslou’s marriage and louis’ mental state . it does not, in any way, shy away from the absolute horrors of living with and loving a violent man who has proved that he is capable of harming you as he likes, and yet the absolutely stunning prose and captivating portrayal of louis, lestat and claudia makes it impossible to ever click off.
'Once Lestat had loved him, hadn’t he? Didn’t they make love once upon a time? Wasn’t the pleasure pure and clean once? Not this raw, acid desire hollowing him out, stripping the myelin from his nerves.   /   He can’t remember. Call it concussion-induced amnesia, or, more likely, wilful ignorance, because what if? What if they were like this from the start? What if he chose this continual debasement?'
The Time We Have by SnakesandRabbits [@nakiaslilhoodoo]
[complete, E, tags: armandlou]
a snapshot in armandlou’s relationship, filled with snack breaks, needy louis, a brief intermission from the worst (kind of)ex-boyfriend in the world and, most importantly, louis being called pretty. snakesandrabbits is always gifting us with the content that we need and deserve.
'Armand came to a red light and Louis looked over at him. His eyes landed on Armand’s messy curls, his red eyes, his perfect nose, his stubble, and the way he was biting his bottom lip as he waited for the red light to turn green. Louis found himself grinning and then he said, “You’re handsome like that.”   /   Armand slowly turned his head to look over at Louis, “You’re very pretty with your bonnet on.”'
try to swallow the wave series by gaypiratedivorce [@diasdelasombra]
[complete, M, tags: armandlou]
falsing fiction carved in my way, and its sequel, eat up your sadness, made my jaw drop and my heart ache the entire time that i read it. some of the most gorgeous prose i’ve ever read used to explore lou’s relationship to herself and the decades that she passes through.
‘Something snaps too soon tonight. Lou won’t be able to parse it after, but in the moment it’s a spark catching on a pool of gasoline, something that could be called anger but is actually fear —something other, a monstrous being that wields Lou’s claws and fangs, and that tonight laps at the man’s blood with Lou’s hungry mouth. It feels like that sometimes, like Lou’s feelings are someone else’s, or someone else, a second person sharing this single body with no concern as to room or size. Or perhaps not a person, exactly; a thing, a hungry thing, the devil that animated this dead body and is slowly feeding on the soul within to one day replace it entirely. Lou’s despair threatens to swallow her.’
twelve days by themasterletters, weathermood [@devotiondroid & @weather-mood]
[complete, E, tags: armand/louis/daniel, armandlou, danlou, dm]
saved my entire life over xmas i caught up on half of it over a sad xmas eve and suddenly forgot i had any problems in the world . the craziest and most ambitious link-up of the century with the most insane and morally dubious armandlou dynamic of all time. made me enjoy reading danny. horrible. go and read it now or else.
'To want more and more and more, falling endlessly into it. He didn’t want it to end, he wanted everything, so badly that the hunger burned. He hadn’t known that about himself. Or maybe he’d denied it. Either way, he couldn’t unknow it now.'
Wolfkiller by The_Lame_Goat [@iwtvdramacd18]
[complete, M, tags: claudia, lestat, louis]
the most insightful look into claudia’s character through a hunting trip between her and lestat, which does not shy away from all of the ways that she relates to him and hates him. it is unflinching in lestat’s violence and how claudia has been forced to survive within the knife-edge that is his home. truly one of the best pieces i’ve read, just phenomenal. 
'There were many horrible truths between them that proved too difficult to pull back fast enough. With Lestat gone and Louis confined to recovery in small spaces, the house (which Claudia had cleaned and she’d rearranged the shelves and took books to her coffin and filched fancy pens to trade with her own fancy pens when she bored of them and when it came time to decide what to leave as a reminder and what to put away SHE had made the final decision SHE DECIDED IT–) had finally become her house. Lestat crossed the threshold and her house cowered and creaked under the weight of his boot over its floors. She watched him do it and watched Louis flinch when he saw himself in her mind’s eye, superimposed and cracking with the foundation.'
Yawning, Terrible Voids by The_Lame_Goat [@iwtvdramacd18]
[complete, M, tags: armandlou]
armandlou is a scarce resource. armand pov armandlou is an even scarcer resource and so i treasure this fic enormously it is very dear to my heart and only half because i feel like the louis final girl line was geared entirely to my interest. this fic weaves through armand’s memories with outward ease, slipping between memories of san francisco, of the horrors of his time with m*rius, and then back to the penthouse in dubai.
'Armand is cradling Louis’ face between his hands as he sits in his lap. Between kisses Louis asks him, “Could you do it? Could you crush my skull if you squeezed hard enough?” His teasing has become more visceral. Dirty talk in the tearing of deep tissue. His smile is full-faced and eye-squinting and nose crinkling in the way that Armand loves. The weight of him is warm and soft and pliant and plush with fresh blood. Armand could eat him alive. Arms close around his shoulders and pull their bodies closer. Louis’ laughs are shaking his body. “Don’t even say nothing. I know you can. You’ve done what Lestat couldn’t.” Even Armand’s body moves with the force of his laughs. They go wheezy. He’s burying the sounds into the crook of Armand’s neck. He’s sobbing.'
LOVE U ALLL<33333
125 notes · View notes
iikatsukii · 1 year
Text
3:15 (breathe)
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synopsis: story inspired by the song 3:15 by russ
pairings: lo’ak x metkayina!reader
warnings: angst to comfort & minor violence
word count: 6.6k
a/n: ive been writing this for too long but im back with a present 🫶🏾 (also i know this one isnt shortened by a read more thing im sorry guys i tried idk why its not working but hopefully when i get my laptop charger back ill be able to fix it but pls just bare with me just this once)
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you had been staring at the roof of your marui for about 20 minutes now. you were dreading getting up. you've felt like this for the past few months but couldn't pinpoint exactly when it started. being the youngest daughter of tonowari and ronal is like asking every boy in the clan to court you. when you chose rotxo, all the boys in the clan were heartbroken. you and tsireya found it kinda funny, to be honest.
you and rotxo have been dating for about half a year now. everything leading up to the relationship had been amazing. the fleeting glances, soft touches, the surprise dates. he had courted you perfectly, so he was over the moon when you finally said yes. his loving actions continued three months into the relationship. then suddenly, you started to notice a shift in his behaviors.
he wouldn't surprise you with dates anymore, he only hung out with ao'nung and his friends, he wouldn't make time for you, and when you did ask to spend time with him, he would brush you off, saying he was busy.
of course, your siblings didn't know about this. rotxo told you not to tell them. "i mean, what would ao'nung think of me? he would never want to be friends with me again," he told you. you sighed, "you're right, rotxo. i'm sorry. i won't say anything." rotxo pulled you into a hug, holding your head to his chest so you couldn't see the smirk he held on his face. on the other hand, you held an expression of self-doubt. like you knew the choice to not speak up was dumb, and you wished you could take your words back, but you couldn't bring yourself to do it.
so you remained in rotxo's arms day after day, putting on a show that everyone believed. never saying anything to anyone. never saying anything about all the harsh words rotxo would say to you, about the loneliness you felt, or about the scars he left on your heart.
tsireya, your twin sister, suspected something was off about your relationship because of how differently you had been acting recently. ever since rotxo started treating you poorly, tsireya would hear you cry yourself to sleep every night. still, when she confronted you about it, you would brush her off, saying she was probably hearing things from how tired she had been. and the thing is, nobody else seems to hear it, so it's not like tsireya can have someone to back her up.
you finally gathered the energy to get up, 2 hours later than you were supposed to, and you groaned, knowing your father was going to kill you. you quickly get dressed, rushing to find someone, anyone who can tell you where your father is. finally, you see a huge crowd, what looks like the entire clan, gathered at the shores of the beaches.
"uturu has been asked.." you heard faintly. as you made your way to the front of the crowd, where you heard your father's voice, you caught the tail end of the conversation. "toruk makto and his family will live among us. my children will teach your children the ways of the water so that your family does not suffer the burden of being useless." you hid behind your father. as he spoke, you looked over to who he was talking to.
a group of 6 darker-toned na'vi were standing huddled together. 2 parents and 4 children. you analyzed each child, still hiding behind your father. the smallest, youngest na'vi was holding her mother's hand, hiding behind her leg, similar to how you're hiding behind your father. the older female, who looked about your age, had an annoyed look on her face. you giggled at her expression, being able to tell that she wanted to be anywhere but here.
then you looked at the taller, assumingly older brother. he looked tight-laced, like he was the perfect child. a golden boy, if you would. not really your type but eh, who are you to say anything. you have a boyfriend, for crying out loud. you shouldn't even be thinking things like this in the first place. you rolled your eyes, ignoring the annoying thoughts in your head, as you looked at the other boy standing next to the eldest son.
that's when you noticed the eyes that were staring back at you. they were the prettiest amber color you've ever seen, accented by… is that hair above his eyes? his eyes glowed in the sun, and his markings? don't even start; his markings running along his body were mesmerizing. but the one thing that interested you was the look he held in his eyes. nobody had ever looked at you like that, and of course, that makes it harder to pinpoint precisely what makes you feel this way. while you were entranced in the visitor's eyes, you failed to notice your own boyfriend noticing you. once the clan's people started to disperse, your sister grabbed your hand and dragged you over to the new family.
rotxo was going to approach you, but he was stopped by ao'nung, who nodded his head back to the water, where they would later meet you, tsireya, and those 'freaks' for lessons. ao'nung missed the furious expression his best friend held. rotxo was quick to fix his face, though, playing nice. he saw the looks between you and that forest boy, and he was not happy about it. he decided to observe from afar before confronting you about anything, not wanting youîu to know that he noticed anything.
as you and tsireya approached the family, you got to take a closer look at the boy before you. your thoughts, though, were interrupted by your twin, "let us show you to your new home," as she and you guided the new family to their home, you could tell their father was trying to stay positive, but the way their mother dropped her belongings when she saw where they would be living was comedic to you. you couldn't help but chuckle at her reaction, not maliciously, of course. you're not like your brother ao'nung and boyfriend rotxo.
"sister, i was late to the gathering. i have no idea who these people are or what's happening." you whispered to your twin. "oh right! where were you, by the way? i had to go through ilu training with the boys alone! it was horrible." she groaned. you sighed. yeah, you're definitely gonna get your ass beat when you get home. "father didn't happen to notice, did he?" you said, already knowing the answer. tsireya just laughed "skxawng." she said, hitting your shoulder. "hey!" you said defensively, ready to hit her back until a hand caught yours. you turned around to see one of the new na'vi boys. it was the younger one.
"as amusing it is to see two sisters-" he started
"twins," you and tsireya corrected at the same time. it freaked both boys out, but they thought it was cute in a way.
"as amusing as it is to see twins bickering with one another, i believe a lesson is in our near future? per request of your father, that is." the tone he used was teasing. how could he speak to you with such confidence when he didn't even know your name? rotxo had never spoken to you like that. his words were always soft, almost shy as if he didn't want to scare you with how loud you knew he could be. for some reason, though, it made you like rotxo more.
but with how things have been going well recently, rotxo isn't that soft-spoken boy anymore. hell, he barely acts like your boyfriend now. so maybe it won't be wrong to get to know someone new? only as a friend, though. you would never dream of cheating, let alone act on it.
you looked down to see that the younger brother, whose name you still had yet to find out, was still holding onto your wrist, waiting for an answer.
oh shit, he's waiting on an answer.
you had zoned out, daydreaming about the boy who was gazing at you equally as curious. thankfully you guys had an energetic little girl to catch your attention. "LAST ONE TO THE WATER IS THANATOR BAIT," she said as she jumped into the water.
you and your sister giggled at the young girl's actions, deciding to jump right in after her. the remaining na'vi jumped in as well as you and tsireya swam, guiding them to where you would have this supposed lesson. as you and your twin swam, she explained everything that had happened while you were sleeping using your clan's sign language. it was making more sense now. this family fled their home, seeking a safe place to stay… uturu…
as you had gotten to the rocks by the beach, you noticed that your brother was there, which could only mean one thing. rotxo was here, too, great. you didn't really feel like pretending to be happy with him around people right now, but you slapped on your usual fake smile, praying to eywa that these newcomers were as easy to fool as everyone else on this island.
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you had begun your lessons as usual, you and tsireya being paired up with the youngest son as he was having the most difficulty.
"breathe in. breathe from down here," tsireya said as she placed her hand on lo'ak's stomach. you placed your hand on his heart to check its speed as you continued, "breathe out." you sighed again. "lo'ak, your heartbeat is fast," you said, looking up at him, happy that you had learned his name because now you could address him by his name.
"sorry," he said,
"try to focus," tsireya added, his eyes meeting hers as she spoke. you noticed that when his eyes shifted, his expression remained the same bright, curious look he gave you; he also held with your sister.
maybe that's just how he looks at people, you thought as you continued to help him.
you felt eyes on your back, knowing it was rotxo staring at you. you looked over your shoulder and made eye contact with your boyfriend, smiling and waving at him, getting nothing but a stone-cold look in return. nobody seemed to notice, so the embarrassment was yours alone. or so you thought until you turned back to lo'ak, seeing as he had seen the whole interaction between the two of you. nobody had ever noticed something like this happen. you tried to read the forest boy's expression but couldn't. all you knew was that he didn't have that same bright look in his eyes as he looked at rotxo.
so maybe he doesn't look at everyone like that…
the exchange sent a shiver up your back. you had a feeling nothing good would come of these two interacting, but over the months, rotxo had diminished your self-confidence, finding yourself seriously doubting your judgment. so you ignored the feeling, not thinking it would be worth risking the normalcy in your daily life.
with lessons finally ending, you excused yourself from the rest as you walked back to your marui, knowing that your parents were about to beat your ass. you walked into your home with your ears flat against your head, tail between your legs, and head hung in shame.
"y/n te ronal'ite," your mother sneered.
oh yeah. you're fucked.
"father, mother, i am sorry i do not know why i overslept this morning–"
"this is the fifth time this has happened, child. you do not know why you have overslept five times this month?" your mothers' words were harsh; you knew she was very upset with you because of how you had been acting recently. you also knew she didn't like your relationship with rotxo, no matter how nice she thought the boy was. to her, something was just off, she could hear eywa whispering to her about it at night, but when she awoke in the morning, it became nothing but a second thought as all her tsahik duties became a priority as she started her day.
"mother, i am sorry. i do not know why this is happening, but i promise it won't happen again," you said, falling to your knees and begging your parents for forgiveness. you hated when they were upset with you, from when you were a kid until now—especially your father.
you were a daddy's girl; you couldn't help it. your father was your safe haven, and you hated when he was disappointed in you even more than you hated when your mother was mad at you. so when you looked into his eyes and saw concern and not disappointment, you knew something was wrong.
"ma y/n, what is the matter? ite, if something is wrong, you know you can tell me." your father tried.
this was the one thing you couldn't confide in your father for. usually, you have little to no trouble telling your father what's wrong, but this was different. you couldn't bring yourself to tell him. so you just looked up at your father, tears in your eyes, and said
"nothing is wrong, father. i have no excuse for waking up late, so please issue my punishment. i have to finish my chores for the day," hearing your voice so cold sent a shiver up your parents' backs. that was what made them realize there really is something wrong. no matter how much you deny it, they can finally see past the facade that you've been keeping up.
how have they never noticed? how long has this been going on?
ronal looked at her husband, silently asking him for help. for once, the tsahik didn't know what to do. as attuned to eywa as she was, the great mother can't outright tell her what is wrong or how to solve it, thus leaving ronal feeling hopeless.
useless.
a tsahik who can't even help her own child. what good is she?
tonowari cleared his throat, drawing attention to himself.
"two weeks, ilu keeper. you are to bring and return the villager's ilus as well as headcount the north, south, east, and west pens before the eclipse to ensure all ilus are accounted for. you are dismissed," your father's tone was equally as cold as yours. you knew the game he was playing, and you wouldn't fall for it this time. you knew your father was just trying to reciprocate the attitude you were giving him so you would crack. so you quickly left your home, knowing that if you stayed any longer, you would burst into tears and beg your father to hold you in his arms.
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your depression had continued for months after the day of the sullys arrival. things with rotxo had only gotten worse, and to you, it seemed like nobody was noticing your depleting health. but in reality, everyone knew you were sad, but nobody knew why.
except for one person
you were so grateful for lo'ak. he was the only person who noticed. he saw everything and sat you down, saying you couldn't endure this abusive relationship anymore. he saw all the scowls and rolled eyes your boyfriend sent your way when you were looking and when you weren't looking. he also saw stuff that you hadn't seen. like rotxo entertaining different girls throughout the village. all of those girls being the ones who you said were your very good friends, but more specifically, it was your best friend.
you and your sully boy were walking along the shore, deciding to go for a walk after he had returned from his daily chores. the walk was silent, but you noticed the furrowed eyebrows above lo'ak's eyes, indicating that he was thinking.
"if you think too hard, you may end up hurting yourself, forest boy," you teased, giggling at his reaction. the boy had rolled his eyes, relieving his eyebrow of their stress as he nudged your side with his elbow. "hey, watch it," he said, laughing along with you.
then he got serious again, you noticed the stress return to his eyebrows, and you couldn't help but stop walking, concerned for your friend.
"lo'ak, what is the matter?" you asked, voice quiet, almost a whisper. lo'ak had barely heard it over the sounds of the tide washing up against the shore. he was silent for a while, debating on if this was his place to say anything, but the boy was worried for you so he spoke up.
"as your friend, y/n, i cannot allow you to continue to be in this relationship." his words were firm. you knew this was coming, and you were hoping you could avoid it, but in the end, it seemed inevitable. you sighed, exhausted, dropping your facade.
"lo'ak, please. don't say anything to anyone. i am fine, okay? rotxo is just busy, is all–"
"yeah, busy suckin' face with your so-called friends, y/n," lo'ak huffed, tired of seeing you endure this treatment. you perked up at his words, though. what was he talking about?
"what do you mean?" you said as you stepped closer, wanting to look deeper into his eyes to ensure he wasn't lying.
"your boy has been cheating on you with all the girls you call your 'friends', especially your best friend. whenever he says he's busy with ao'nung and the guys, neteyam tells me he sneaks off halfway through. and i've personally caught him with so many girls y/n. he's been cheating on you." the words echo in your head.
cheating?
with your friends?
your boyfriend…
your boyfriend.
a new feeling had blossomed in your chest. it felt like a raging fire in your chest, out of control and blazing with heat. oh, you were pissed. so lo'ak hatched a plan for you.
"take this," he said as he reached up to his neck, taking off his communicator and giving it to you. "wear it tomorrow. and right before eclipse, i want you to go to the west ilu pen. but be quiet when you get there. that's usually where rotxo meets your best friend." the words squeezed at your heart, but the fury in your chest overpowered it all.
"fine," you said as your eyes met his once again. you moved your hair behind over your left shoulder as you turned around, signaling for him to put the communicator on for you.
once it was secure, you turned to face him again, knowing that this would be the last moment of peace you would have until the storm you had been so severely trying to avoid.
"thank you," was the last thing you said to the forest boy before you made your way home. knowing the next day would be one of the worst days of your life.
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it was a few minutes til eclipse, and you were waiting in a hidden spot near the west ilu pen just like lo'ak had told you. you had been waiting here for 15 minutes, and neither rotxo nor your best friend had shown up. did lo'ak lie? what reason would he have to lie? it's not like he likes you. lo'ak always uses phrases like "as your friend…" and "friends don't treat friends like that," insinuating that he, too, thought of you as a friend and nothing more, so what reason would he have to lie. you were about to radio him, pressing the button on your neck, because you were getting annoyed waiting here for so long. but then you heard a familiar laugh.
that's your best friend's laugh.
you turned around, peeking through leaves to see rotxo and your best friend holding hands, laughing with one another. keeping your hand against your communicator, you tried to get as close as possible without revealing your hiding spot so that lo'ak could hear everything happening.
"are you sure this is okay, rotxo? what about y/n? you know she's my best friend." your best friends laughter had died down as the two came to a halt.
"ma yawne, you need not worry." your boyfriend reassured.
"but what about her? you guys are in a relationship, and she is olo'eyktans daughter. if we get caught, we're done for. plus, she's been looking so sad recently. i can't help but feel like she knows." tears sprung to her eyes and you couldn't help but roll your own.
"mawey, my love. she does not know. besides, she has been ignoring me recently. i've been left alone, wondering if she's okay. i ask her every day to talk to me and tell me something; i reassure her that i'm here for her and that she can talk to me about anything. she brushes me off, not even giving me the time of day. it is like she has completely shut me out. i feel so left in the dark," your best friend just coos at the boy, pulling into a hug in an attempt to 'hug' him when she really is just trying to push her boobs against his chest. his hand placement wasn't any better. he had his arms wrapped around her waist, pulling her closer to himself if even possible.
OH, BOO FUCKING HOO, IS HE FUCKING SERIOUS RIGHT NOW??
it was taking every molecule of self-restraint in your body not to blow your cover and strangle the man you call your "boyfriend." upon hearing his words, you could only scoff. this is what he's been doing? while he's been ignoring you, leaving you lonely and hurting, he's been out in the village, cheating on you and playing victim, making everyone think you were ignoring him.
you could only roll your eyes as you walked away before you were discovered. you were furious. you knew exactly how you wanted to approach this, thinking based only on your heated emotions, throwing all rational away. as you walked away, your hand fell from the collar around your neck, knowing lo'ak had heard enough. he was probably on the way to your parents' marui right now to tell them everything.
you walked to rotxo's family marui; glad to see the rest of his family is still out doing whatever they do. you could care less. he and anyone related to him could perish, poof into thin air, never to be seen again, and you wouldn't bat an eye. in fact, just the idea of it brings a smile to your face. a smile that instantly dropped when the flap of the marui was pushed aside, revealing your boyfriend and your brother.
"ao'nung, leave. i need to talk to rotxo," you said as soon as you made eye contact with your older brother. you knew he was clueless about what had happened because he was hanging out with his friends all day. supposedly, so was rotxo.
"sorry little sister, but you're going to have to leave. rotxo and i are–"
"AO' GET THE FUCK OUT!" you screamed at your brother, eyes falling to the floor, knowing he wasn't the target of rage, so you probably shouldn't be treating him like this.
your brother was surprised you raised your voice at him but listened anyway, knowing that this wasn't his problem and he honestly didn't care about your relationship as long as rotxo treated you right. and to his knowledge, his best friend is treating you right. rotxo, you told your brother that it was you shutting him out, so ao'nung just assumed this would be another one of those 'irrational arguments' that rotxo always tells him about.
watching your brothers back retreating toward your home, you turned your attention to the man of the fucking hour.
"my best friend? are you serious right now, rotxo?" you asked him to get straight to the point.
rotxo rolled his eyes, groaning because he realized you knew he was cheating on you.
"y/n, don't be like this. my family will be home any minute–" you cut him off.
"i do not care. you are walking around telling people i shut you out? cheating on me? you are out here forcing me to put on a smile, fake happy, so your reputation doesn't get ruined, and you have the nerve to try and bring mine down with you? saying i'm leaving you in the dark. making yourself seem like the goddamn victim?! you're cheating on me, rotxo. FOR FUCKS SAKE." the english word that the sully children had taught you felt like the only word that could adequately convey your feelings.
"using the words that sully boy taught you, huh? you know you've been spending a lot of time with him. you're lucky the only rumor i spread was that you left me in the dark. be grateful that i'm not telling everyone how you've been spreading your legs for that freak." you gaped at his words. how did he know about how much you've been spending with lo'ak? of course, he's completely wrong about what you guys do but he's always busy with his friends, blowing you off, cheating, and not caring who you're with or what you're doing. regardless of how he knew or not, you and lo'ak were friends, and that's it.
"we are just friends. i would not even have to hang out with him if my own shitty boyfriend actually acted as if he fucking likes me. we hang out as all young na'vi do, free diving, ilu racing, sea shell collecting. things i've done with you, my siblings, and countless other friends, like the bitch you are cheating on me with, so why is it a problem when i do it with lo'ak? hmm, rotxo? what's your fucking problem? are you projecting? is that it?" you were blinded by your rage, not even realizing that you had approached your boyfriend, but it felt like your words weren't getting through to him. he still held this shitty condescending smirk on his face, and you were sick of it. so you pushed him with all the strength you had in your body. rotxo fell to the floor pretty hard, groaning in pain as he landed funny on his wrist.
"ah! ha–" rotxo graoned in pain as he gripped his wrist. his gaze met yours as he spoke again "look, she's finally snapped. what? are you going to go, run to your little demon blood? are you going to let him cheer you up like the little slut you are? might as well prepare yourself for tomorrow because when ao'nung asks me what we argued about, i'm telling him i found out you were cheating on me with that sully boy," rotxo stood from his place on the floor, holding a look you had never seen on him before. he walked towards you menacingly as you matched his pace, walking backward until your back made contact with the wall of his home. his hand came up to your neck, squeezing, not noticing that he had once again pressed the button on your collar so lo'ak could hear everything.
“y/n? what's wrong? what's going on?" you heard his voice in your earpiece but kept quiet, not wanting rotxo to know he was about to get caught.
"you're so easy, huh? playing hard to get for everyone in the village when really you just wanted to be a whore for a half-breed freak who has only brought problems and war to our home–" you pushed him off of you, running out his marui with your head down, not wanting him to see your tears as if he hadn't already.
as cruel as rotxo had been to you, he had never called you such degrading names like this.
as angry as you were, hearing someone you once loved say things like that to you felt like a bullet to the heart.
you ran to a hidden oasis within the forest line of awa'atlu. only you and rotxo knew of it, but recently you've found yourself coming here alone much more than you would come here with him.
falling to your knees in front of the river before you, you allowed the dam to break, letting all your pent-up emotions out. you couldn't help but cry to yourself. you hated life like this. you hated living a lie, not wanting to bare this pain anymore. you cried, sobbed, screamed, wailed, anything to get this hurt out of your heart.
rotxo had broken you. he had taken your pure, innocent heart and smashed it to pieces. no matter how much you tried to love and care for him, you realize he would never really love you. it was all just a ploy to get in with the olo'eyktan's daughter. he was just like every other stupid boy on this island. but you fell for him, and you hated the feeling.
and for him to cheat with your best friend, of all people? how could he? did he even love you?
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to say lo'ak was worried was the understatement of the fucking year. he was basically having a panic attack rampaging the island after he didn't find you in rotxo's marui when they arrived. lo'ak had come with his family and yours, everyone having heard the cruel words that rotxo had spat at you thanks to lo'aks communication device.
jake and neteyam personally held lo'ak back from killing the metkayina in front of him.
"YOU FUCKER! YOU CALL HER A WHORE WHEN YOU'RE THE ONE STICKING YOUR DICK IN ANYTHING THAT HAS A FUCKING HOLE, YOU PUSSY–"
"lo'ak, that's enough," jake said, trying to restrain his youngest son.
"NO, HE'S RIGHT! DAD, LET ME GO! LET ME BEAT HIS ASS!" lo'ak looked over to see tonowari and another warrior holding ao'nung back, but the look on tonowari's face showed that he was seconds from ripping rotxo limb from limb for what he had said to his daughter.
that's when lo'ak noticed you weren't in the marui. pulling himself from his father and brother's restraints, he ran out, immediately going to all your favorite places on the island, trying to find you.
he searched the shallow reefs on the east side of the island. he visited the ilu pen on the south part of the island because that's where you kept your ilu. he checked the floral shoreline on the northwest part of the island, knowing that you loved getting all your flowers from there, whether it was for your hair, a top, or a gift for the new boy on the island.
lo'ak noticed a forest line near the floral shores, so he also decided to check within that area in case you were wandering around there.
walking through the forest area kind of reminded lo'ak of home. he had been reminiscing on the flora of his home when he heard what sounded like crying—very loud crying.
immediately arming himself, prepared to protect himself or someone else. lo'ak stepped into the clearing, seeing you kneeling over the stream, fists clenched into the ground beneath you as you let out the most heart-twisting cries he had ever heard.
you were crying so loud you hadn't even heard the forest boy approaching you. feeling arms engulfing you, you began to panic. whoever it was immediately tried to soothe your struggles, and much to your surprise, you listened. you felt warmth, security, and comfort. things you never felt around rotxo, at least, not anymore.
"mawey, y/n. mawey. try to match my breathing," it was a familiar voice, but with all the physical and emotional pain clouding your senses, you couldn't pinpoint who it was. regardless, you tried your best to match his breathing, your heavy breaths slowing to quiet sobs and whimpers. it felt like your heart was really breaking. this realization was painful. rotxo didn't love you. he was using you.
you just wanted to be loved, and rotxo made you feel that way for a while. but that was the problem; it only lasted a while. then everything went to shit, and you were left cold and alone while rotxo was out cheating on you and forcing you to fake a smile for everyone around you so that you wouldn't ruin his reputation.
your cries had died down, and you were resting within the hold of the person behind you. his hushed words of comfort hadn't stopped, praising you for controlling your breath as he soothingly rubbed your shoulders. when you calmed down enough, you turned to look at the source of your comfort. it was honestly one of the last people you expected it to be.
you would've thought your brother or sister would find this secret spot before the forest boy did.
"lo'ak, what are you doing here?" you asked him, trying to escape his grasp and wipe your tears at the same time. lo'ak was quick to grab hold of your hands, preventing you from moving away from him.
"mawey, y/n. just relax. i'm here for you, and you can cry all you want to, sevin. i am not going anywhere." his voice was so comforting as he pulled you back into his embrace. you just sighed as you felt another wave of tears coming to your eyes. so you cried it out, relieving every sob, scream, and cry you had ever kept in, and lo'ak stayed with you through it all. never once letting you go and never stopping his whispers of reassurance.
when your sobs died down again, you noticed he intertwined his fingers with yours. you hadn't noticed his hands before. you weren't aware, but your ears perked up a bit, and your tail started to rev to life a bit when you saw he had five fingers instead of four. you wordlessly detangled your hand from his, causing the boy's ears to fall flat to his head.
you noticed his hands. did you see him differently now? his thoughts started as a drizzle quickly forming into a hurricane, but when he felt both of your hands grab one of his pulling it closer to your swollen eyes so you could examine it better, he chuckled. he thought it was cute, seeing you fiddle with his fingers as your soft sniffles continued. if this was distraction enough to keep you from crying, then lo'ak would let you play with his hands 24/7.
you didn't know that lo'ak's hands were his biggest insecurity, so the way you played with them and looked at them with wonder and not worry made his heart swell. lo'ak had not thought his life would be turned upside down like this, being forced to move away from his home and learn new ways of life. he hated it. but willingly getting to know someone and maybe even starting to fall for her had to be the best thing on that list. lo'ak knew he liked you for a while but never made any advances as you were taken. even though he could've been treating you so much better.
he loved how your hands felt in his and how your smile brightened up an entire room. he loved how attuned to nature you were. you hadn't even realized the school of fish swimming around your ankles rested in the river before you. it was as if the animals were trying to comfort you, too, somehow being able to sense your distress.
“y/n. do not listen to him. he is nothing but a lowlife who derives pleasure from others' pain," lo'ak started ranting, not caring if you were listening. he just wanted to speak his mind. "you are beautiful, y/n. the most beautiful, strong, loving, kind, graceful na'vi i've ever had the chance to meet. if moving away from my home means i get to find a new home here, with you, i would fly, walk, jump, or crawl my way here a hundred times over. i would do anything to be with you properly. i want to heal you from that asshole's mistakes. i want to show you what it feels like to be loved. not because you are olo'eyktan's daughter. but because you are you."
his eyes remained focused on yours as he recited every word. but you could tell he wasn't speaking something memorized or forced; he was speaking from his heart. you could hear it, as if eywa herself was whispering it to you. but you were hurt. could you trust someone so soon?
almost as if he could read your thoughts, he spoke up again.
"i know your trust is weary right now, but let me prove it to you. i will court you properly, meet your parents officially, ask for their blessing, i–" lo'ak sighed, almost as if he didn't want to continue, but he did. "i'll even stop fighting with ao'nung." that got a laugh out of you.
"lo'ak, are you sure about that?" you asked, looking up at him through your tears, flashing the first genuine smile he had ever seen on you. he was amazed. if he thought your fake smile lit up a room, then your genuine smile could bring light to an entire clan.
"i would do whatever you want me to do, syulang. i just want to be with you. i want to love you if you'll have me. we can take things at your pace. i'm in no rush because, for you, i would wait forever," he yearned for you, waiting patiently to see if you'll accept him.
you couldn't find any reason not to. this boy had to have been sent to you by eywa. he was meant to be the remedy to heal your heart after this tragic breakup. you were crying, but they were tears of joy and relief. you were finally free. free to feel love. free to feel happy. free to be you.
in the heat of the moment, you felt something wiggling under the ground beneath your leg. looking down, you see a glow worm inching up your leg. most do not know, but since the metkayina spirit tree is underwater, these little glow worms come up from the sand or appear on or around you whenever eywa tries to give you a sign. they're the metkayina equivalent of a woodsprite.
you could only gasp at the sight of the tiny creature. so he really is eywa sent? you thought as you saw a glow worm crawling up lo'ak's shoulder. this caused you to laugh, seeing as he also noticed the glow worm on his shoulder and started to panic, trying to flick the bug off his shoulder without hurting it.
"kehe, don't do that," you said as you grabbed his hand to prevent him from hurting the poor thing. you carefully placed your hand in front of the glowworm, allowing it to crawl into your palm. you took lo'ak's hand in yours, facing his palm up to allow the glow worm to walk from your hand to his.
"what is this?" he asked as he brought his hand closer to his face turning it as the glow worm walked around.
"i've heard about omatikaya woodsprites from kiri. they are like that but for the reefs. they are sent from eywa, meant to be wordless messengers," you explained to the forest boy.
your forest boy.
lo'ak couldn't help but smile at you, processing the words you had said. as he spoke again, he held nothing but love in his eyes, "y/n, i see you. oel ngati kameie," he gently held your face in his hands to ensure you made eye contact with him as he said it to you. you cried even harder because rotxo had never said that to you. and you're glad he didn't because you wouldn't have been able to say this back,
"oel ngati kameie, forest boy."
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702 notes · View notes
daenysx · 1 year
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hello, i hope you enjoy this one, slight nsfw at the end. requests are open for some inspiration, also please let me know if you like the way i write or the concepts, thank you!!!
my masterlist
dizzy & charming
modern!aemond helping you relieve some stress.
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it was a busy friday and at the end of it, all you wanted was drinking and relaxing your thoughts and your body. you went to a bar with your best friend, both of you started drinking and having fun, but then she left you to go out with a guy she met at the bar. you called aemond, he told you to wait there. you weren't exactly drunk but feeling dizzy and tired. you just sat on a bar stool and waited for your boyfriend.
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aemond walked into the bar and searched for you with his eyes. when he noticed you he started to walk past people, you were already staring at him because it was impossible not to see a man like him even when you're drunk. people around him were looking as he walked gracefully, probably the most handsome and charming man they could have ever seen. he came next to you, looked at your eyes, you were trying to keep them open. it was like your body was melting and you couldn't stand straight. you held on to him, having your arms around his neck. he was already holding you, his hands at your waist. your tired fingers were running in his platinum hair. 
"my sweet girl," he said to your ear. "do you feel okay?"
"yes, just tired and a little dizzy. i had a few drinks."
"just a few, hmm?"
"it was the longest day ever, i was trying to relax."
of course he understood you. you were both in the same university and studying too hard. it was not suprising, he always knew how you trying to relieve. you were still hugging and you brought your nose to his neck.
"you smell perfect."
"hmm. i will trust your word with it."
"can i kiss you here, aemond?"
"you can do anything you want to me, my love."
you felt dizziness making you smile without your control. you got closer to him and kissed his neck with. his jawline, and his lips were next. he kissed you back but then he pulled away, looked at your tired but happy smile, he didn't want to stay in the bar anymore. he helped you stand and hold you until you were in his car safely. during the ride, his hand was on your thigh, you were mumbling a song, he was looking at you with a faint smile. after a tipsy 15 minutes for you, you reached his apartment. when you were getting out of the car, you stumbled and he was already holding you.
"let me carry you upstairs, darling."
"no, it's okay if you just help me walk."
finally you were in his bedroom. it was past midnight, you immediately went to his bed. he took of his jacket, shirt and trousers. he put on his sweatpants and nothing else. he sat on his bed, your eyes were closed and you were still slightly smiling. he helped you with your clothes, took of everything except your underwear and made you wear one of his shirts.
you pulled him closer, your eyes open now and you started kissing him. your hands were all around his body and he was touching you under the shirt. he kissed your lips and your neck. 
"my pretty girl, i thought you were tired."
"i am tired but i want you closer."
"then i suppose you should just relax and let me do all work."
he took of your underwear but not your shirt. you reached his hands trying to make him understand what you want.
"would you like me to use my fingers, love?"
"yes, your fingers please."
"whatever you wish for."
he started to touch you. you were already wet, probably since kissing him at the bar. you parted your legs for him, his long fingers were looking for that sweet spot inside you. normally he could tease you, a little more, but he knew you needed your release right now. you were whimpering, prettiest sounds he ever heard. your head was spinning, it was all too much and not enough at the same time. he knew eveything about you and how to give you pleasure. he knew how to touch you, the way you want him even if you didn't say.
"yes, right here please."
"like that?"
"just like that."
"my sweet, perfect girl. look at you, desperate for a relief, your head full with thoughts. that's it, take your pleasure."
"aemond..."
"just a little more for me, okay? you're doing so good."
"i'm so close."
"i know, love. just a little more."
he was kissing your lips when his skillful fingers were inside you, touching that perfect spot, making you a mess. you came with a silent moan, his name on your lips, your back arching and your eyes closed. he let you have the moment little longer, not taking his fingers away. when your breaths turned normal, he stood up, went to the bathroom, brought a soft towel and cleaned your thighs, helped you wear a clean underwear. then he came to bed and pulled you closer, kissed your hair. you were sleepy now, all that dizziness mixed with the pleasure he gave you.
"i should help you relax too, i feel bad like this."
"you can't even keep your eyes open, sweetheart. don't worry about me."
"aemond..."
"yes, my love?"
"i'm so in love with you, i can't even express it with my words."
"we have that in common then. i'm in love with you too, my pretty girl. you should sleep now."
"good night."
"sweet dreams, baby."
584 notes · View notes
retroellie · 1 year
Text
Cheater
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Summary: When finally toe to toe with Daryl after him cheating, you are given answers you rightfully deserve
A/N: First wanted to say this fic was inspired by @starrydixon 's fic, i legit got so angsty that i wanted to write my own and my own little interpretation of it, so definitely go read theirs <3. But enjoy this complete mess i made in literally 2 hours lmao.
Warnings: Cheating and angst
Word count: 2.1K
You stood in front of him like a deer in headlights, you were terrified to even speak. The Daryl Dixon, the asshole, the cheater, the love of your life was standing in front of you, something you promised never to let happen again. This is the first time you had been in the same room after the incident, after he had told you the thing that ruined your entire life.
Part of you wished he would’ve just kept it to himself, letting you live out your perfect love life with him but part of you was so glad he told you. You would much rather be depressed the rest of your life than be looked at as a fucking clown by everyone but not know why. You hated them though, you wanted to slit his throat right here and right now, Daryl felt so bad that he’d actually let you too.
Either of you were too scared to speak, too afraid to bring up the very thing that broke your relationship in the first place. You were afraid simply because it had been going okay so far, nothing like how either you anticipated your first time seeing each other in 2 years would go. Daryl came to help with the water treatment and you were there, all sweaty and worn out. You froze when you first saw him, looking over at michonne who was looking at you looking at him.
She never even told you he had come to visit Alexandria, no warning but simply because she thought he wouldn’t stay long enough for you to see him. He just came for some supplies but ended up sticking around to help out with Alexandria, it was still his home after all. After the water treatment was finally up and going again, you did the unthinkable… you invited Daryl into your once shared home for a glass of water.
“Just to make sure the water treatment is fixed.” You tried to be cheery abit it but something about his eyes made you angry.
Why did you invite him in? You have no idea, maybe because you missed his presence or you wanted to ask the questions that were constantly running through your head or maybe you just wanted to kill him then and there. Daryl was hesitant but he would not pass up the chance to spend time with you, before or after even if he felt terrible for what he did to you.
So here you were, standing in front of him, watching him look at anything but your eyes. Good, he didn’t deserve to look into your eyes after what he did. The house was silent as you drank your waters, neither one of you wanted to bring it up but you decided to rip off the bandaid before it got worse.
“How long did it last?” You asked, the only thing coming out of your mouth in the past 10 minutes.
Daryl could’ve played stupid but he knew what you meant, he knew the answer would leave you more devastated too. Daryl racked his brain to give an exact estimate of how long and each answer created a deep puncture in his chest.
“6 months.” He said plainly, his eyes dropping down to his now empty glass.
Your entire body had gone frozen, your heart crack open more and more as the answer lingered through the air. You knew It was long but 6 months was too long. Your first 6 months with Daryl he had told you he loved you, he fucked you like there was no tomorrow and his told you it would only be you and him for the rest of your lives. What did she get in those 6 months? Did she get the same treatment? What could’ve possibly happened in those 6 months?
“6 months?!?” You damn near yelled, making it known how upset you were.
Daryl just kept his eyes down, he felt so ashamed of himself and he knew you were too. He didn’t speak, just let you have your moment because after all he’s done… you deserve that. Now the question we’re piling up in your head, you didn’t just want answers now you needed them. You closed your eyes, took a deep breath and asked another question.
“What was her name?” You asked, not even knowing if you wanted the answer.
“Leah,” he said without letting the question linger for too long.
“Did you live together?”
“Yes.”
“Did you fuck her?”
“Yes.”
You questioned him rapidly, not even taking a break before going on to the next. You felt you deserved these answers after the long 2 years of them burning in your brain. You asked about her, you asked about him and you asked about what they were. With every answer, even if they were yes and no’s, your heart would break more and more. You needed that though, you needed Daryl to break your heart so you felt sick even looking at him, just so you could move on and heal.
“Why?” Was the only thing you said, no context to what you meant but somehow Daryl knew.
He thought about it, he had no idea why… it just happened. That question had him frozen, struck on the biggest question you’ve asked so far. He racked his brain, trying to find the words for how he really felt and why the hell he did something so stupid. He was stupid was plain and simply put an answer but you deserved an explanation. He finally got the courage to look at you standing there, eyes streaked with tears as you grabbed onto your own hoodie violently. Daryl still thought you were the most beautiful thing but right now he felt he didn’t even deserve to see you.
“I’m stupid y/n, I really am but when Rick disappeared I was sad. I don’t know why but I still had hope he was still out there and I knew I was going out all the time to hurt you, I could feel you getting more distant.” He paused, racking his brain to find more words. “You got so distant that I thought you wanted me out of your life so I did, I stopped coming around because I couldn’t bear to see ya. Then Leah showed up. I knew that when me and you first met, the thing we had with each other, the love we made and the memories, it filled a hole in me… you filled a hole in me Y/N. I was expecting the same thing to happen with Leah, I thought the hole you used to fill could be filled with another person… but it can’t.”
You sobbed even more, tears rushing down your face and you couldn’t even stop them anymore. Daryl’s words were something you needed but when you got it, you couldn’t handle it. His words were too much, they didn’t make you feel any better but only worse. He tried to replace you, he needed to replace you when you needed him the most. You craved him back then, you just wanted your stupid boyfriend to hold you for a while because Rick's death didn’t only hurt Daryl.
Rick was your brother, not by blood but by souls he was. He cared for you, he made sure you were safe and he even saved you in so many ways, even from yourself. So when he died, you couldn’t… you were depressed and Daryl leaving all the time did not help, Daryl was looking for ghosts when you needed him the most.
“I needed you Daryl…I needed you and you weren’t there.” You said simply, shoving your face in your hands as you continued to sob.
Your sobs broke Daryl, he could feel his tears starting to spill over his eyes. He never meant to hurt you, as a matter of fact he promised he would never hurt you and as if you needed more of a reason not to trust anyone again… he broke that promise. He deserved to rot with the walkers for what he did to you and hell he even tried at one point, but he wouldn’t hurt you again… you couldn’t handle another death.
“I’m going to ask one more question Daryl….” You said, taking in a breath before asking. “Did you love her?”
He wanted to laugh at that thought, him loving Leah?? Impossible. He fucked her, he cuddled her, he even let her say he was hers but he knew deep down… He was yours, always and forever. Even if you don’t forgive him now, he will always be yours no matter what. You found him at his worst, you gave him a chance and he fell in love with you. He had never felt that way about someone before, let alone someone like you. A pretty, smart and strong person like you… he never even would’ve thought you would give him the chance you did.
“No… I couldn’t.” He stated, voice cracking as his tears continued to flow down his cheeks.
“You couldn’t?” You asked, confused about what the fuck he meant. Daryl was never good with words and you knew it too.
“I just couldn’t, deep down I knew it was always you I wanted and loved. Y/N what I did wasn’t because I stopped loving you, I did it because I loved you and the feeling you gave me was too good… too pure and when I thought I lost it, I had to get it again but I couldn’t.” He started, explaining himself with words but not even knowing if he was saying anything right.
You stayed silent, the words engraving themselves into your brain. You just sat there, looking down at your shaking hands. You never knew a man could do this to you, leave your sobbing and shaking as he explained why he couldn’t love anyone else but you. You couldn’t forgive Daryl, you couldn’t… you had a soft spot for him but it wasn’t that soft, you wouldn’t just let him break you down again like that.
“I’ll leave you alone…” Daryl set his glass down, picking up his things before turning for the door.
“Daryl!” You yelled before he could even step another foot away from you. Daryl stopped in his tracks, turning once again to face you.
“If you step outside that door… I swear on everything  you will never see me again, and I promise you that I will not let you step foot back into Alexandria… you know I have that power to do so.” You threatened, you were angry… he was leaving you again.
“You want me to stay?” He asked, adjusting the crossbow on his shoulder uncomfortably.
“No… no, yes… I mean FUCK! Daryl I want you to stop leaving me, stop running away from us Daryl!” You yelled, not even sure what you meant. “I fucking hate you Daryl… I fucking hate you so very fiber in my body but not because you ruined what we had.. but because after everything you put me through, I’m still so madly and pathetically in love with you.”
You were quite literally pouring your heart out for Daryl and he took it all in, he just hates that he was the one who caused you to do this. You weren’t sure what you wanted but right now you knew you didn’t want Daryl to leave you alone again, you have been alone for too long and you needed him here again but if he left once again you couldn’t bear it.
“So please Daryl… please just stay with me, don’t leave me again.”
Daryl couldn’t bear to see you like this, your eyes wet with tears and lips red from your biting them… what’s worse is that he caused this. He didn’t know what to do in the situation but what he did he for sure thought was the right thing to do. He dropped all this stuff, engulfing you in a hug as you sobbed. You didn’t know if you should hug back or not but you were too broken down, too afraid and too fucking sad to push him away. You wrapped your arms around him, squeezing him close to you like it was your last time seeing him.
His hands made their way up to your hair, lightly scratching your scalp because he knew you liked that. You just buried your tear streaked face into his shirt, causing his shirt to become damp.
“I’m here bunny… I’m not leaving again…” he said, cringey at the pet name but you needed it right now, you needed to know he was there with you.
You were not sure if this was going to spark something once again between you two, you had no idea but having Daryl here with you and speaking to you like he once did, it caused your thoughts to stop for a minute… letting you just feel the way you used to for a minute. If all you got was 2 more minutes of that feeling, you were okay with it.
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vax-merstappen · 2 months
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home (aa23)
summary: after a stressful day at work, you come home to find that your boyfriend has returned early from a race.
this is my first time writing a fic like this, so i hope it’s alright! please send me requests for more fics or prefs! i only have so much inspiration of my own lol
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It seemed like your coworkers always had it out for you. Thomas couldn’t be have been bothered to send you the files you had been asking him for since last week. Mallory couldn’t solve her own problems, so you had to solve them for her. And on top of it, your boss had given you an assignment that she needed done by the end of the day… an hour before your shift ended. Needless to say, the stress had piled up.
You did your best not to have a breakdown in the parking lot of your office or on your drive home. Instead, you put on some sad music to accompany your drive. Usually you would call Alex if he wasn’t busy on your way home. Unfortunately you knew that today he was wrapping up some work with Williams after the last race. He had placed fairly well and you didn’t want to interrupt him or bring down his mood. So you drove home alone.
You parked the car and began to let it all out. The pent up tears of frustration came pouring out. You thought that no one could see you in your car and you were safe to be vulnerable for a minute. The sobs came on harder and you banged a fist against the steering wheel before a sudden moment caused you to look up.
Your boyfriend Alex was standing on the stairs to your house, holding a bag in his hand, a shocked expression on his face. That couldn’t be right? He wasn’t supposed to be back until tomorrow?
Alex quickly ran down the stairs and opened the door to the car.
“Babe? What’s wrong?” he asked kneeling down with concern.
“Work,” you mumbled.
“Hey, it’s okay baby, do you want to talk about it?”
“No. I want to go inside.”
Alex nodded and held your hand. He grabbed your bag with your work stuff and the two of you made your way into the house. You noticed that Alex had set up candles around the living room and poured two glasses of wine. The smell of takeout food drifted through the air from the kitchen and a bouquet of roses sat on the couch.
Alex sighed and examined the room. “Hey, I didn’t know you had a bad day, I can just clean all this up if you want to be alone. I’m sorry...”
“Don’t,” you cut Alex off before he could continue. “I like it.”
“You do?”
“Yes, babe,” you sighed, tears of love springing into your eyes. “I can’t believe you surprised me.”
“Anything for you. Now where do you want to start?”
The feelings from your terrible day slipped away as they were replaced with love from your incredible boyfriend.
“Right here,” you said, gesturing to the couch. “I just want to be with you. It’s been so long.”
He nodded and grabbed two blankets from the table next to the couch. “I’m sorry, babe. I wish I could be around more.”
“I knew you’d travel a lot when I started dating you. It’s fine, but it doesn’t mean I don’t miss you.”
The two of you curled up on the couch and you felt comforted by Alex’s embrace. He had a way of making you feel so loved.
“Are you sure you don’t want to talk about it?” he asked. “Normally you call me with a rant about your terrible coworkers.”
You shook your head. “None of that matters anymore now that I’m here. They can ruin my job but they can’t ruin my time with you. Nothing can ruin my time with you.”
“I’m sure I could find something that could ruin our time, maybe a tickle fight? Or I could make a really annoying joke?”
“Don’t you dare try, Albon, don’t you dare.”
Your eyes were closed but you could sense him smile.
“I would never hurt my perfect girlfriend. Never.”
“So I’m perfect now?”
“Always have been.”
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Death by Gray Sweats
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Brainstorm w/ @tedllasso: you need to write something where ted walks around the house in sweatpants and making reader extremely thirsty and she just can't thinking about anything else but to take all of THAT in her mouth.
Description: You just can't resist Ted in his gray sweats, but can anyone really?
Warning : oral (m receiving)
Pairing: Ted Lasso x reader
Word Count: 1.5k
A/N: shout out to Lilli for inspiring this fic and then making the sexy gifs used above.
-
You sit on the couch, scrolling through your phone when you hear the click of the front door lock, looking up with a smile as your husband enters the house, “Welcome home, Teddy.” Ted meets your eyes, a bright smile on his face when he sees you, “Well hey there, honey! Did ya have a good day?” Nodding, you put your phone away and curl up under your blanket, “It was good! Pretty busy though so I was thinking that we have a chill night? I have the takeout menus and television remote ready to go. What do you think?” 
Ted comes up behind you, leaning down to place a kiss on your head, “Sounds perfect, darling, just let me go get in my comfy clothes.” As Ted walks to your shared room, you cue up Netflix on the tv, going to the rom-com section so you to can make a decision for the night. You look at the takeout menus for a couple of minutes, choosing some options from different places so you are prepared no matter what restaurant Ted chooses. 
Hearing Ted’s footsteps approach, you place the menus down on your lap and turn to give him a smile, your breath hitching when you see him. That stupid evil man. With his hair loose and a tendril falling in front of his face, Ted joins you on the couch dressed in a University of Kansas tee and his gray sweatpants. Those fucking sweatpants.
Even after three years together, those sweats still had an effect on you, an effect that Ted knew and was either choosing to ignore in order to torture you or he hadn’t thought about it when changing. ‘Well beautiful, I’m feeling Chinese tonight, what’d you think about that?” You just nod in response, still staring at Ted who gives you a confused look before picking the menus up from his lap and pulling out his phone.
The first time you slept over after getting together, he wore his blue and green flannel pajama pants, and, of course, you loved them. If someone didn’t love them, you would swear they had no eyes. The flannel bottoms were great and you requested he wears them every Christmas. The first time he slept at your place though? He brought over those god-forsaken sweatpants. Having already slept together, you knew how, ahem, gifted he was, yet it felt like those sweats accentuated his size even more.
As Ted calls up the restaurant, you can’t help but let your eyes lock in on Ted’s bulge. You’re thankful that Ted knows your normal order for this place because you don’t know if you have it in you to talk right now, more important things are at hand. Things like the way Ted’s pants showed both the impressive girth and length of his member or how the sweats sat just perfectly on his hips that when he stretched his arms up while letting out a yawn, you saw his tummy that you love so much. Turning to throw a wink your way as he finishes up the order, Ted is incredibly confused when he notices you staring off into space. Yet somehow, the man doesn’t notice the place at which you are staring.
Hanging up the phone, Ted sets the menus on the shelf by your television before making his way over to you. He stands in front of you, putting his crotch right in front of your face, god, is he stupid or just plain evil? He places a finger under your chin and makes you look at him “What’s going on with you, honey? You haven’t said anything in almost 10 minutes. Cat got your tongue?” You practically whimper at his choice of words, a cat had not gotten your tongue but you surely wish your tongue was somewhere else right now.
You shake your head, squeezing your thighs together in an attempt to relieve some pressure, “N-no, I’m fine Teddy. Just distracted.” Ted nows slowly, sitting down next to you, and places an arm around you, pulling you into his side as he begins to trace circles into your covered hip. “Ah, what’s got you all distracted now?” You love Ted, you love this man with all your heart, you have a ring on your finger to prove that, yet you still didn’t know how he couldn’t understand how much he turns you on just by existing. “Well, did you happen to think about the consequences of your decisions when you chose what pants to put on?”
Ted looks down, letting out a small chuckle as he realizes what you are referring to, “No, I didn’t think about my consequences because yes, I know you like these, but they surely aren’t enough to have you all in a fizzy like this.” You take a deep breath, trying to figure out how to portray to Ted the effect his gray sweatpants have on you. You turn to him, holding direct eye contact with him, “Ted, the minute you walked out in those, I wanted to be on your cock while you fuck my mouth.”
The soft circles on your hips slow to a stop, Ted’s eyes widening as his mouth opens slightly and his cheeks redden, “R-really?” You nod enthusiastically, “Teddy, I can see your tip through your pants and all I want is to lick it until you cum down my throat.” Ted clears his throat, glancing at the clock hanging on the wall, “The delivery person will be here in twenty minutes.” 
Smiling wickedly, you lean forward to share a steamy kiss before tossing your leg over Ted’s lap, now straddling him. You return to kissing him as you grind down on his lap, pleased to feel that he was already semi-hard though not completely surprised, that man never failed to tell you how hot he found his wife. Ted whines as you pull back from the kiss, sliding off his legs and down onto the ground in front of him. Kneeling in between his legs, you reach up to untie the strings of his sweats with one hand as you palm him with your other hand. Tossing his head back, Ted lets out a low groan as he claws at the blanket next to him, then hissing when you pull down his pants just enough for his cock to spring up, his sensitive tip being exposed to the crisp air. 
You lean forward and lick a thick stripe up the side of his erect member, eliciting a guttural moan from deep in Ted’s soul, “O-oh god, Y/N.” You loved giving Ted a blow job, any kind of sex with him was amazing but he just completely let himself go when you went down on him. It was like you were seeing a part of your husband that he kept hidden, he would let his walls down when he was in your mouth. You lick up from the base of his cock to his tip, pulling it into your mouth and sucking strongly before releasing him and licking down the other side of his member to the base. 
Moving your head down a little, you nose his cock to the side in order to gain access to his balls, covering them in kitten licks as Ted thrusts his hips up. Giggling at his eagerness, you pull away from his balls, instead taking him in your mouth and going all the way until his tip hits the back of your throat. Ted moans, thrusting into your mouth to create movement before stopping himself. He always does this, no matter how many times he’s in your mouth, he hesitates to create the pace, not wanting to go too fast for you.
You take his hand and place it on the back of your head, looking up at him through your eyelashes to tell him that it's okay. The sight of him in your mouth as you look at him with doe eyes absolutely breaks him, causing him to pull your hair into his grip and begin to pull your head back and forth. You open your jaw as much as you can and relax your body, letting Ted truly dictate your pace as your body is just along for the ride. You hollow your cheeks as much as you can before moving your hand to fondle his balls, rolling each one back and forth in his hand as the other grips his clothed thigh tightly. 
“Oh honey, I-I’m gonna…” Trailing off before he can finish his sentence, Ted moans loudly as you tighten your lips around his cock, leading to him unleashing ropes of cum down your throat. You pull yourself off of him as his member softens, wiping away a drop of cum that landed on the corner of your mouth with your thumb before putting the digit in your mouth, whining at the taste. Ted pants loudly as he stares at you, pulling you onto his lap and then kissing you deeply, holding your face in between his hands. He moves his attention down, sucking a mark into the base of your neck, his mind set on repaying the favor, “Golly darlin’, I really should wear these more often.”
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roomsofangel · 1 month
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I WISH YOU STAYED.
choi san | written by roomsofangel
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pairing ex!san x reader
genre(s) angst angst angst!
word count 871
warnings just full on angst, there’s not really any comfort. mentions of reader consuming alcohol but its only once and nothing comes out of it. mentions of arguing, alludes to a toxic relationship despite they’re being a lot of love. right person wrong time sorta thing, a lot of hurt.
synposis its raining and you find yourself thinking of the past again
or
is it possible to meet again in the dream realm? is it possible to have the same dream? san finds himself asking this question, on a rainy night, thinking of the past
a/n i know i said i was gonna post an update for my current ongoing fics soon but i wanted to write this first and post it…now, this work means more to me than anything and i technically did have help despite them not knowing i’d even write about this. this is a form of also letting go for me in a way. i used specific quotes from my favorite movie that reminds me a lot of the situation and the person this was inspired about.
rain tapped against the window, a slow and steady beat that filled the room with its somber rhythm. the air is thick with the wet, damp smell of rain, mixing with the faint scent of your shampoo from the day before and the melancholy in your heart. your bed is warm against your skin, holding you close as you stare up at the ceiling
you weren’t sure how long its been, how many hours passed but the rain only got heavier with time and it reminded you of the internal struggle of what you seemed to always feel nowadays. what were you? the rain or the rainbow? the storm or the first speck of sun that comes shining through to give people reassurance its about to be a better day?
if you were asked at this very moment, you’d tell them that you were the storm and your rainbow went to go find another raincloud to help give reassurance to
“i need a drink,” you muttered despite being the only one in the room, sliding out of bed to wander off into your kitchen where you used your refrigerator as a nightlight. you took out a glass and set it onto your counter, going back and forth between the fridge and the countertop. you poured yourself some amaretto, watching it fill up to the top of your glass and set it back into its cold home before bringing it your lips
with each sip, you felt warmer inside but the ice that manifested itself to stay in your flesh and bone didn’t thaw out. you still felt hollow like you did that night.
“we were never good for each other..” he whispered, sniffling as he watched you with matching teary eyes. you swallowed the cry that threatened to spill, chewing on your bottom lip as you nodded. “and we tried.” he added in with a bittersweet laugh to mask he was hurting too
god, why did he always have to mask his hurt? you hated how he always did that even in your dreams, but was this even a dream when it all feel so real?
you watched how his hands came up slowly, cupping your cheeks to have you meet his teary gaze and you sniffled, “i know.” you replied back, voice soft and wobbly
“there’s more to life, y/n.” he pressed his forehead against yours and you let yourself breathe, taking in what would be the last time you could feel him again, “there’s more to life than arguments and whatever it is we had.”
you sniffled, “i know.” pressing your lips together, tears running down and you could taste the saltiness of your heart breaking. “i know.” you repeated again as if the first time wasn’t enough, as if the second time wasnt either and he sighed
it seemed as if everything was demolishing around the two of you, the room you were in. the floors creaked and the walls began to show signs of decay, the cracks becoming more evident while the windows, despite not making noise to show the damage, were shattering with each second that passed and you found yourself muttering, “what if you stayed this time?”
“we both know i can’t stay…” san whispered, voice filled with the same hurt you remember him having that night and you found yourself breaking more, “i walked out the door.”
you prayed to whoever was out there, whomever was making you have this lucid dream to let you keep this, let you have this one last time for a little longer but it seemed it fell on deaf ears from when you blinked and then found yourself at the same door you will always have burned into your memory.
you watched how san had his hands in his pockets, nose rosy as he sniffled and walked more out the door just how he did back then,
except,
the only difference was you running to the doorway, “san!” you called out, hands on the frame while your voice cracked at how you tried not to cry and he turned to face you with an expression that was filled with both surprise and heartache, “come back and make up a goodbye at least.” you managed to get out after the silent gaze made you fall apart all over again, “lets pretend we had one.”
and you could see his expression falter, how his adam’s apple bobbed up and down while he gulped and wiped his eyes when he walked towards you.
the same rain falls heavy against another window and slides down, leaving thin rivulets down the glass. a relentless makeshift waterfall that served as a constant reminder of the grief that dwells within san’s mind. he sits on the edge of his bed, sniffling and trying not to remember what he dreamt of but it burned through his skull and itched his frontal lobe
he swears he still had your words from that dream in his head, how you looked at him and called out from the door i wish you stayed.
he choked back in his sobs, letting himself stare at his hands while he wept, knowing you couldn’t hear how he whispered into the air, “i wish i stayed too.”
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dreambunnynotes · 4 months
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daily reflection: nov. 16th ❤︎
good morning lovely friends! here is what i accomplished and what i could have improved today, to hold myself accountable. it was really effective for me to know that i had posted my goals list on tumblr yesterday where others could see it; whenever i felt like giving in to my adhd brain that tells me that tasks are to be feared, i would simply remember that i had kind folks online who were interested in seeing me succeed hehe, it helped me so much! here is my first day ❤︎
accomplishments:
i completed all of my cleaning goals and more! it turned into a deeper clean than i thought it would be which felt really nice (and is usually how it goes once i get cleaning). it's so lovely to be able to start fresh with a clean working and sleeping space; it's so much easier to feel inspired, be productive, and take care of yourself when your environment is as ready for you as you are for it!
i wasn't going to complete all of my texting and calling tasks, BUT I DID! these types of tasks are the hardest for me to get done because i have pretty intense social anxiety and rejection sensitive dysphoria, and communicating with others both online and offline takes a lot of mental preparation and energy for me. but i did it, and i am so, so proud of myself! in fact...
self-compassion:
not only did i accomplish my original communication goals, i also ended up replying to two friends i hadn't seen in a long time, even though i was anxious! both of them were at my sister's show last night and i was so surprised to see them and a couple of other friends that i had to go have a bathroom cry from the anxiety lol. i had so many emotions coming up; the first was sadness and shame seeing that they had all come in a group together and that i wasn't with them. i joined them two seconds after i saw everyone, but the sadness was still there because i was positive they would have invited me into the group earlier if i had been less isolated this last year, which is where the guilt came in. i realized i had been isolating from my friends for so long out of fear that i wasn't wanted, didn't provide anything to them, and that maybe i didn't have people i liked being around after all, but that is so, so far from the truth; i do have friends who love me and who i love, and all of them were so loving, so kind, and actually sent me messages after the show telling me how much they loved me and how happy they were to see me! it made me cryyyy and feel so many feelings. i have plans to see them next week, and i actually feel like i'm overcoming my isolation era at long last; i'm really proud of myself for having self-compassion and using tools i've learned in therapy to better my life! :')
my next step is to learn more about and overcome this shame i have around letting my friends love me for who i am; the only way to learn more about it is to actually make plans to see friends and be vulnerable; wish me luck 😭💗
improvements to make:
as for my other tasks; i cleaned out one of my emails, but i have so many email accounts that it felt a little bit lacklustre to call that an accomplishment. today i'd like to break down how big the task of consolidating my digital life will actually be so that i can take measurable and consistent steps towards completing my goal (writing that sentence is baffling me right now - bunny from a few days ago never would have realized how much writing out her goals could help her in being less afraid of them! this feels like a huge accomplishment for my adhd brain!)
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today felt like a really successful day, and i'm super proud of myself! this was only the beginning of what i actually want to accomplish in a day, but it was such a great way to try it out. i'm excited to see where this journey takes me and how these daily checklists and reflections will affect my productivity; they already have helped so much! if you've made it to the end of this, thank you for taking the time to read about my day, it means so much to me! lets try our best to have another successful day! ❤︎
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lemonykoo · 2 years
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some of the genshin boys when you have a nightmare!
Includes: Diluc, Gorou, Albedo, and Scaramouche
Genre: Fluff!
Word Count: 380-500ish words per character.
Notes: Just short bullet imagines on what the boys would do when you have a nightmare! Just the boys being mushy, love sick fools over their s/o. I realize that this is a kinda popular thing to write about, so I just want to clarify that I didn’t take any inspiration from anyone on this. If there’s anything I’ve written that is very close to what someone else has written, though, let me know! Spoilers for Albedo’s lore and Scara is very loving and probably a little ooc but who cares! I was going to include more characters but I got kinda tired and couldn’t think of anything, but if you want more characters, just let me know and I’ll write a part two! (Not edited btw hehe)
Diluc:
You paced in front of the fireplace, your bare feet padding against the dark, hardwood floors softly as you bit your nails anxiously. The firewood cracked and popped as it burned slowly beside you and the heat it radiated would normally give you a deep sense of comfort, but it was no longer present – not at the moment. Not with your heart beating wildly, daring to jump right through your ribs and your skin and out of your chest and onto the floor.
“Lady Ragnvindr,” head-maid Adelinde stated as she watched you pace around restlessly, “maybe you should sit down and drink a cup of tea. The Master will be home soon.” When you didn’t respond, she sighed. “You just had a nightmare, y/n. Master Diluc is just at the tavern tonight, and he’ll be back before you know it.”
“I’m not going back to the bed until I know he’s okay,” you answered quietly. Adelinde nodded, before scurrying off to make you a pot of tea.
The minutes ticked by slowly and agonizingly, but almost two hours later, the front door to the Dawn Winery creaked open. Diluc entered silently, under the impression that you’d be upstairs sleeping. Instead, he was met with you sitting in front of the fireplace with a teacup in your grasp as Adelinde sat beside you holding the tea pot. When the door shut, you were startled out of your daze, drawing your attention to him as he approached you. “Diluc, you’re okay,” you murmured, standing to greet him.
“Of course I am,” he responded, shrugging his coat off and tossing it aside onto a nearby chair. When you were close enough, he embraced you warmly and placed a soft kiss on the top of your head before planting another on your lips. “Why would I not be? Did something worry you?”
You had almost forgotten about your tragic dream since Adelinde had convinced you to sit down and tell her what was bothering you so much. You were feeling a lot better now, but you still wanted to be awake for your husband’s return to ease the ball of anxiety residing in your stomach that just wouldn’t leave. “I just had a bad dream,” you explained simply. “It made me worry about you.”
Diluc still had you in his embrace, keeping you close to his body. He glanced up to see Adelinde smile gently at him before leaving to go to the kitchen with the tea pot and cup you had sat down. “Well,” Diluc started, “I apologize for not coming sooner, darling.”
Diluc knew that you always worried for him, with his vigilante job and whatnot. He wished he could reach into your mind and pluck those worries out so you wouldn’t be bothered with any scary dreams of something bad happening to him. Since he can’t do that, though, he’ll just hold you close in the bed, hoping whatever bad dreams tried to disturb you during the night would be scared away by his presence.
Gorou:
You never felt the need to worry for Gorou. Sure, he was a general, but you never felt… anxious or scared when he went out to defend the resistance. You were always confident in his abilities. Being a childhood friend of his and now his lover, you knew Gorou was capable.
After the height of the Vision Hunt was reached and all the fighting happened, though, you quickly realized that danger becoming your fiancé was very real and wasn’t just something to brush aside like you had been.
You tried to convince yourself that you weren’t going to show how worried you were for him though and choked down those thoughts. It didn’t take long for those worries to surface in your dreams, however, and turn them into nightmares.
While you slept, you’d be tormented with visions of Gorou being defeated during a battle. The way he’d lay lifeless on the ground, his vision no longer glowing golden but rather fading in color, just like his life from his veins. You’d wake up in a panic before making sure Gorou was still with you, peacefully sleeping beside you after a long day’s work.
Tonight’s nightmare was just awful, though – worse than any other nightmare you had yet. You don’t know why it was particularly worse this time, but it was and you wanted it to stop but it never did. Just when it couldn’t get any worse, you awoke, sitting up quickly and banging your head on something in the dark.
“I’m sorry!” you heard the hushed whisper of your fiancé in front of you. You opened your eyes to see him rubbing a spot on his forehead. “You were whimpering in your sleep, so I was trying to wake you up. I didn’t expect you to jump up like that.”
You felt a dull pain on your skull from the accidental head butt you had given him. “It’s okay,” you reassured. “I was just having a bad dream.”
“I could tell,” Gorou answered, shifting to sit beside you. “I didn’t want you to experience it anymore… so that’s why I wanted to wake you up.” He reached toward you and guided you to lay against him. “I know you’re worried about me, y/n, but it’ll be okay.”
He laid down, you following suit with your head on his chest, and his arms came to lace around you to hold you closer to him. “But you don’t know that,” you murmured, tears surfacing in the corners of your eyes. “What if it’s not okay?”
“I know I can’t promise anything,” he said. “But, knowing I have you waiting for me at home keeps me here. I can’t just leave you here all alone. I never have and I never will.”
You didn’t feel like forming a rebuttal, and instead continued to lay there and let your fiancé play with your hair as you drifted off to sleep once more.
Albedo:
Your eyes popped open and you observed your surroundings, your heavy breaths beginning to calm as you realized you were just in your room, and no longer in whatever hell you had been in in your nightmare. You sat up and looked at the spot in the bed beside you to see it empty. Flashes of your nightmare surfaced in your memories, and you gulped, remembering this was exactly how it started.
Swinging your legs over the side of the bed, you got up and ventured to the hallway outside of your room, stumbling a bit as you had just woken up. You paused before turning the knob to the room your boyfriend often holed himself up in with his research and cracking the door just enough to see him at his desk, swiftly jotting down notes.
“You’re still here,” you whispered without thinking, drawing Albedo’s attention to you as you lingered in the doorway.
“Oh, y/n, did I wake you?” he asked, turning a bit and welcoming you to come in. You walked over to him and once you were close enough, he placed an arm around your waist. “No,” you responded. “I just had a bad dream.”
A look of concern crossed Albedo’s face as he looked up to you. “A bad dream? What was it about to make you so upset?”
You bit your lip, images that hurt you the worst appearing in your mind like pictures in a photo album. His blonde hair, the fire raging behind him, the blood on his hands. “You destroyed Mondstadt, or at least what was supposed to be Mondstadt.”
Your boyfriend stood from his chair and enveloped you into a hug. “Let me take you back to bed.” What you couldn’t see as he hugged you was how concerned he looked at the mention of your nightmare, but he didn’t want you to see that. “Nothing like that is going to happen, okay?”
With that, he led you back to your bed and laid you down, before getting ready for bed himself so he could ensure that you would be okay.
Even though there was a bigger truth to him than what he told you, Albedo hoped that you would be gone by the time he got to that point. And if you weren’t, he at least hoped you’d be spared from the monster he’d become. But for now, he’ll hold you tightly underneath all your blankets to comfort you that he’d never become what he feared.
Scaramouche:
With a jolt, you awoke, sitting up as your heartbeat pounded in your head. This strange feeling of anxiety coursed through your veins and you don’t know what woke you up but it must have been a nightmare. You felt panicked as your eyes scanned the dark room around you, hoping you could remember what your dream was about in hopes of calming down. As for the time being, though, you could only remain scared and anxious over an unknown cause.
“What are you doing?” a voice asked, startling you. You looked beside you to see your husband, gazing up at you from his position beside you. You could see in the soft moonlight his slightly annoyed expression, but in his eyes you saw concern. Your heart rate seemed to slow as you remembered that everything was okay – you were just at home, safe underneath your covers with the man you married just almost a year ago.
“I just had a bad dream, Scara,” you stated, sighing a bit before you laid down once again. “Sorry if I woke you up.” You rolled over to your back to him, back into the position you had been before you had woken up. You knew he wouldn’t be upset if you had – you had come to learn that his annoyed expressions weren’t really anything and that it was always his eyes that told you how he was feeling. Still, you hated that you might have disturbed him, since he needed every bit of sleep he could get.
“I was already awake,” he responded curtly, though you felt his arm wrap around your waist and pull you closer to him. That was another thing: though his tone could be cold and brash, you knew it had been conditioned to be like that due to his work. You could hear the gentleness and love peppered into his words when he spoke to you, even when all others could hear was short, bland sentences. A quick, soft kiss was placed on your exposed shoulder. “Just go back to sleep, y/n. I’m here.”
Even though he didn’t say it out loud, you could hear the rest of his thought in the night air around you, wrapping around you lovingly like the arm wrapped around your waist.
Nothing will ever harm you if I’m here.
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