cw: implied sexual trauma, panic attack, intimacy struggles
You don’t notice it happening until it’s buzzing under your skin. Loud and unavoidable, the only thing you can pay attention to is the irregular flutter of your heart and the way it seems that all the air has been vacuumed from the room—
“Hey.”
You blink, and Katsuki is no longer above you. He’s not touching you at all—you turn your head to find him next to you, propped up on an elbow and only worried.
“Too much?”
The panic flares at the question, because what if this is the last time? What if he’s tired of this?
Your exhale is shaky—your laugh is forced and sounds out of place. “No, it was fine, I just—“
“Oi—“ he says, gently, “tell me the truth.”
The truth burns your eyes and keeps them on the ceiling, away from his. You nod, helpless and resigned to whatever comes next.
“What’s goin’ on in your head?”
You feel the tears spill over before you can catch them. You swipe them away with the back of your wrist. It’s still numb. “I’m just sorry. I didn’t mean to ruin it.”
He grunts a little in acknowledgment—a displeased, ugly sound—and then there’s movement that finally draws your eyes to him. You watch him cover himself with your duvet—all the way up to his chin.
“S’it okay if I hold you?”
He reaches for you and you let him pull you in. His hands stay above your shoulders and pointedly avoid your neck—cradling your head, letting you hide in the curve of his throat. His pulse is steady and constant against your forehead—or you imagine it would be, if it wasn’t muted by the fabric.
“Nothin’ is ruined,” he murmurs against your hairline, “s’my job to keep you safe.”
Your chest shudders against the cushion of the blanket and you feel a little guilty about crying all over it but Katsuki keeps you there, tethered to him. The ringing in your ears subsides, just a little. Just enough to hear the panic in your own voice.
“I promise I want it. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, I’m sorry—“
“Hey, hey,” he shushes you, careful not to tighten his arms around your shoulders. “Nothin’ to be sorry for. S’too much today—that’s all.”
It’s quiet, then, save for your sniffling. He keeps his mouth pressed to your hair, and his arms wrapped around you. There is a noticeable absence of his fingertips tracing along your skin—you don’t feel them there at all, and it’s on purpose. He’s considerate and it makes you anxious.
“Can hear you thinkin’.”
“I just—“ you inhale, trying to be brave, “I don’t want you to leave. I know I can’t—give you this—“
“Oi,” he gruffs, a little sharply, “I don’t give a shit about that. M’not a barbarian.”
You feel the expansion of his lungs as he draws in a slow exhale, and lets it out against the crown of your head. “Don’t think so little of me,” he murmurs, tone laced with hurt.
“You’re right,” you whisper, because he is, “I love you.”
“Love you.” He kisses it into your skin, soft and barely there. “Always will.”
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Sonic is acting strange.
From the moment he entered the cave at the top of the mountain and going on even after Shadow finished the battle, he was more energetic, talking faster than usual, to his friends’s eyes happier than they had ever seen him before. But deep inside his mind and heart, he felt more melancholic than anything.
Rouge said something about to going visit Shadow, wherever he’d gone, though it’s not probable that Shadow would gift her a powerful gem of inter dimensional proportions, it’s still a possibility. He finds himself comfortable with the idea of either of them guarding it, after all, Shadow would never let it bring chaos to their lives again, and now he knows Rouge it’s a better leader than he could ever be, they both would make the right call.
Sparring with Knuckles was as much of a way to get the stress out of his system as it is a reminder that the guardian isn’t a glory driven danger prone sailor, nor a extremely paranoid jungle survivor, and definitely not a soldier willing to hit an 8 year old if it means saving the world, no, he’s just Knucks. Ready to put him back in his tracks every time he goes off, same old Knucklehead.
Asking Amy to help him bake a cake to celebrate their victory on the mountain took her by surprise, not expecting Sonic to have the consideration or patience to think about and prepare that kind of gift just so their friends would enjoy it together. But what really shook her to the core was how many times he thanked her through the making, in his mind just one of those “thank you” was for the cake, the rest of them were for everything else.
Tails knows Sonic is acting strange.
it wasn’t just the sudden consideration on his words and actions, but also the eagerness to just spend time with them, an insane amount of time in which he paid attention to everyone and everything, he looked to the sea as if it was more of a new racetrack than an obstacle to his speed, he turned his sight to the sky as if he’d forgotten it was blue, and gazed to the palm trees as if he’d never seen one before. But most of it all, between his friends and the rest of the world, Sonic was looking at him.
It wasn’t the normal look he’d give him everyday, being the only one Sonic hadn’t been alone with since the mountain battle was weird enough, they would usually race and joke together after every battle, but not this time; Sonic was actively keeping him at arms length while never getting his eyes off of him, It didn’t matter who was Sonic talking to or what was he doing, if Tails was around, he was looking at him.
Every time he was smiling he would look back to see if he was smiling too, when one of his friends tried to approach him Sonic would instantly get in their way without any more reason than to talk to them, if there was a sudden movement or loud noise Sonic would turn to him as if to expect him to be gone, the calmness in his body being noticeable every time he found him.
It felt wrong, it felt distant, it felt as if he was a problem. He hasn’t felt like this in years.
Hours and hours later when their friends finally got too tired of watching Sonic’s odd behavior they all went their own way for the night, with Rouge just disappearing in the dark, Knuckles claiming he had places to be, and Amy saying the day had drained her and she needed sleep, Sonic and Tails were finally alone.
The walk to Tails’ lab was quick, but quiet. The silence prevailed all the way before they entered the house and closed the door, then it wasn’t quiet anymore.
With the way Sonic practically launched himself over Tails knocking the air out of him as he hugged the kit tightly, both falling to the floor as Sonic held him against his chest with one hand while the other one placed itself securing the fox’s head just below Sonic’s chin. Tails was quiet, way too shocked with the sudden affection after a whole day of being so close while feeling so far away. But Sonic’s sobs and whimpers weren’t quiet at all.
They were loud and broken, not forming any comprehensible words as hiccups broke in every time it seemed like he was actually trying to say something, as if he held back from crying for hours, It felt guilty, sorrowful, and desperate.
Tails found himself breaking his silence and asking repeatedly “what’s wrong?!” as he reciprocated the hug just for Sonic to tighten his arms around him, breaking into fully crying this time, with a sea of tears falling from the speedster’s eyes to the genius’ head, not letting him go even for a second, not loosening his grip after what felt like hours of holding his little brother, who held him back just as tightly.
Even if the tears stopped, their embrace didn’t, with the morning warmth closer than midnight’s coldness the blue hedgehog found himself surrounding the sleepy fox as he fought sleep’s calling to stay with his big brother.
“I love you” was muttered to the boy’s ears as he was claimed by the land of dreams, in which he could fly all day with the shining star he called his brother.
Tails wasn’t sure if that whisper was part of his dream. Sonic knew it wasn’t
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One Piece where everything’s the same except Cora doesn’t die but Law’s still determined to absolutely beat the shit out of Doflamingo anyway. Cut to post Dressrosa where Law gets a VERY frantic phone call from Cora who’s like what the actual FUCK I saw the newspaper this morning you went up against Doffy all by yourself?? You promised me we would do this together you little SHIT do you have any idea how fucking scared out of my MIND I was when I saw the headline and I thought something happened to you, Law I swear to god, and Law’s like yes Cora I went up against him by myself, like HELL I was going to let him lay a single finger on you. And Cora’s like THAT’S MY LINE!!! You’re MY kid and I should be the one protecting YOU!! And Law’s like what with your shitty devil fruit powers? What could you have done? You would have fallen on your ass and gotten hurt or shot or worse and I’d be too fucking worried about you to focus on anything else. And Cora’s like this conversation is NOT over but I’m so so glad you’re okay. And he starts crying and he’s like oh my GOD Law you know how insane Doffy is I could have lost you. And I wouldn’t have even known until after the fact. And Law goes all quiet and he’s like I know I’m sorry but I could have lost YOU and I couldn’t handle that. I couldn’t. And Cora’s sobbing and he’s like I love you so much Law and Law’s like yeah. I love you too 🥺
Meanwhile the Strawhats witnessed this entire conversation and they’re like. Wow okay that was a lot to unpack. Law’s got a dad and they’re very protective of each other and apparently his dad is Doflamingo’s brother?? And Law literally dismantled Doflamingo’s entire criminal organization and DIDN’T bother telling his dad about it?? No wonder he’s pissed. And they’re also like awwwww we’ve never seen Law so soft and vulnerable before 💕 and Law looks at them and he’s like. You repeat ANY of what you just heard and I WILL kill you. And they’re like ‘Mhmm okay yup we hear you loud and clear. Btw what’s your dad like’ with the BIGGEST shit eating grins and Law’s like Okay! Killing you now!! And proceeds to chase them with his katana
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ive been really tempted for ages to write a fic from mu qingfang's pov about how sqh's injuries gradually get more and worse. trying to subtly approach the subject, leaving certain medicines within easy stealing access. desperately trying to talk about it when he comes in one day with a dislocated shoulder, a shattered elbow, and an arm broken in two places. hes just clumsy! he fell down the stairs! nothing to worry about shidi everythings fine! he said its fine. stop. asking. questions. please.
Mu Qingfang is so worried about him, He's really only trying to help and Shang Qinghua definitely seems the type to just straight up not go to the doctors if he can help it so he probably had WAYY more injuries that he hid
Shang Qinghua definitely would just laugh it off like "I'm fine. Im fine! I do so much work I'm bound to get an injury here and there!" Except he's been continously getting injured and to such a degree it's CONCERNING
I would love to see a fic about a concerned Mu Qingfang trying his best to help the resident god that can't seem to control his shit very well
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Happy 9 years in this fandom to me 🥳🥳
I made this tumblr so that way I could start posting my first 1D fic (spoiler it’s unfinished - blame Zayn leaving) and try and make some friends in a new fandom. Very quickly I befriended @ashavahishta (because I asked for beta/britpicking help in my author’s note and she reached out to me 🥺) and I’ve been lucky in fandom friends ever since. I joined fandom during a really difficult time for me personally and sure! The nonsense that was 1D in 2015 was absolutely wild but it also kept me distracted from what I was dealing with and so I will always, always be thankful for this fandom for the people it has brought into my life.
I’ve seen Harry 4 times, one of them being ONO for HS3. I’ve seen Niall twice and will forever be bitter about the canceled Niall/Lewis tour with Fletcher as opener. I’ve seen Louis 3 times, once was for his album release in NYC for walls - WHERE I ALSO MET HIM WITH @crinkle-eyed-boo AND @onesweetworld18 AND HE SIGNED MY CD (and also swore so loud when he realized I was 36 weeks pregnant 🤣) I helped @londonfoginacup and @lululawrence and LOML Jenna hand out hundreds of rainbow flags in Iowa and then danced with Sus waving our flags the entire time and Louis kept coming over and watching us and then gave the SPEECH HE GAVE IN IOWA ABOUT BEING BRAVE AND TRUE TO YOURSELF THAT WAS FOR US IT WAS FOR US SUS HE LOVES US 😭😭
I’ve written over a million words in this fandom, 72 fics in total. I’ve brainstormed so many fics and read even more fics. I’ve been moved to tears and changed by fics I’ve read. Hell fic is what brought me to tumblr to begin with because everyone just had to keep writing this stupid trope where Harry and Louis have complimentary nautical tattoos and this company Modest is forcing them to be closeted 🙄 like what popular fic gave rise to THAT madness (it was them your honor. Those fuckers right over there)
I cried at music the boys have made. I’ve laughed at the dumb interviews they’ve done. I have a stupid teddy bears number in my phone because of these assholes. I’ve been woken up at 3am by a phone tree to let me know new music has dropped. I’ve been here for leaks and demos and rumors and it’s been such a huge part of my life and my identity. You literally can’t say “we are all moving in one direction” in front of me without me giggling.
I love this fandom so much. I love tumblr larries. I love my friends. I am so happy to have been here for 9 years and I can’t wait to celebrate more years 🤗
🎵 The friends we make, the love it takes is worth, is worth, is worth it all this time 🎵
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