Tumgik
#I want to live I wanna get better I want to be alive again
be-good-to-bugs · 6 months
Text
the weight of everything bad in my life has decided to crush me on this nice night
4 notes · View notes
yoohyeontual · 2 years
Text
.
#i was going to sleep but I just broke down crying#it’s so hard guys#i wanna stay strong for him and not worry him#but I really can’t I am not strong I never been#it hurts so much#I’ve through that once but Bunny it was so sudden it was less hard#with Puppy it could go on for years which I really hope it does cause I don’t wanna lose him#but it’s so stressful thinking that any day could be his last idk how I’ll survive this#my mental state is worsening everyday I’m really trying hard to be strong but it’s impossible#he’s also the main reason why I’m still alive cause I remind myself that if I was gone he would miss me and look for me and I get better#him and Sowon are my only source of joy since 2019#losing him will be loosing a part of me all over again#he’s only 12 and all dogs his breed I know lived to 18 it’s so unfair for me I always hope it would be the same for him like Bunny#I’m sorry I didn’t wanna go all depress on here but I’m crying and couldn’t stop and no one is awake right now I need to write to calm down#I’m okay most of the time but 2 nights in a row my mom been freaking out and making me think of the worst#and now that I had a night to empty my mind Friday something happened with puppy making me terrified of loosing him#and I was suppose to go to a concert on May 7th another day that I thought I could empty my mind and it’s canceled#no one wants me to have a break thank god bestie is still coming to see me#I’m gonna cry when I see her 😭#that is if she dosen’t end up canceling for a reason cause she live far away anything could happen so she can’t come here 😔#i wouldn’t be surprise at that point I’m hoping not#now that I’ve calm down a little I kinda wanna go hug puppy but I go see him I feel like if I ’ll break down crying again 😭#i should just go to sleep and not bother him I gotta tell myself he’s okay he’s sleeping at my place cause my blanket is his favorite#and tomorrow I’ll wake up and he will be like like everyday excited to see me and i’ll hug him 🥺#alex.txt#do not reblog#tw sick pet#tw sick dog#tw pet death mention
3 notes · View notes
29121996 · 6 months
Text
.
#i rlly just gotta get through the next month and then life will feel worth living again#i mean im gonna be on autopilot and living in that weird headspace i get when everything feels Too Much#but once i see twice ill have a new found joy for life and . itll kickstart something in my brain#it alwahs does#t1975 did jt last time#however . i do not wanna be alivs for the next few months bc despite the minor relief i feel#i feel like ive nust lost everything and theres a emoty Pit in my chest#its fun its fine its for the plot#anyway i wanna fucking kill myself. here we go again i gotta get this over with eventuslly#rip the bandaid off or something#bc evsn tho i know how i want this to pan out - there is a middle part i dont wanna deal with or accept is haopening#but too bad bc it IS happening !!!!#and . i cant or wont talk abt this bc its sl fucking delusional and . cringy but i am a just a teenage girl in a 21yr old#but FUUUUCK this makes me SICK and i should 100% activate my ego or wtv it is im supposed to Have#but diggity dawg .#side note i feel like i have imposter syndrom or something bc the way i do feel abt this is very . New#like i do genuinely think my self esteem or something has gotten better bc i am so fucking sad dont get mw wrong#but i also dont feel like ive lost a chunk of who i was this time. its just . Upsetting ti know that i dont get to experience that anymore#i gotta find a new way to mmget the same happiness or whatever.#i dont nnow.#i wanna die abt it regardless even if i think im okay#bc i am inherently and i will be !!!! but . hnhnhnhnhnhhn u all get it .
0 notes
heartfullofleeches · 2 months
Text
Horror Femboy Darling who lives in a community chalk full of terrifying beasts and gets picked on by their peers for being too cute. They abandon their home and friends - swearing to never return until they scare the living daylights of every human they cross. Only problem with their plans is that they're just as cute if not moreso to mortals. Darling is unsuccessful in their ventures, but they refuse to face everyone with their goals unfulfilled and be subjected to a life as nothing more than a cute face. Even if they gave up and tried to go back home, their "victims" won't let them off the hook so easily. They've grown attached to the little terror trying their hardest to scare them to death. Darling may not be able to fright the humans, but they certainly have an effect on them that's just as deadly as they try to make themselves out to be
-
Horror Darling: You're terrified of me, right? Right?! My face is one that strikes fear into the depths of your soul - say it or I'll eat you alive!
Yan: Ohhh, nooo - please don't devour me, oh wicked spirit.
Horror Darling: T-that's not funny! I may not look like it, but I can your worst nightmare if you don't stop picking on me!
Yan: If you're what nightmares are made of them I never want to wake up again.
Horror Darling, tearing up: Please... I just wanna go home....
Yan: Oh, baby... You're already home. I'll treat you good - better than all your little friends who made you feel ashamed of what you are.
Horror Darling: Eh?! N-no thank you.... T-this was a stupid idea anyway. I'm sure everyone is worried sick - so I really should go home now....
Yan: I'm afraid you aren't going anywhere, Darling. You really think I'm gonna let a cute thing like yourself go when you're the one who invited themselves into my home?
Horror Darling: This was a mistake. A huge mistake- S-somebody will come looking for me!
Yan: After you told them you'd never come back? Face it, love - You're all mine~
1K notes · View notes
arieslost · 12 days
Note
you have pushed me to ask so here I go
I present my idea of motorcyclist!oscar and his gf who is afraid of motorcycles. He convinces her to try it onc3 and BOOM hands around him holding on the dear life.
I want to hold on to him
I can't stop thinking about that tiktok
Tumblr media
here's a ss I took from the tiktok edit
what a yummy man
the entire time i wrote this i kept coming back to look at this picture because oh my goodness gracious. i hope this lives up to ur expectations <33 definitely wanna write more biker!osc after this
© arieslost 2024. DO NOT REPOST WITHOUT PERMISSION.
Tumblr media
hold on tight | op81
“Just one time?”
“No.”
“Please?”
“No way.”
“Do you even love me at all?” Oscar asks dramatically, jutting his lower lip out for extra effect. 
“That’s not going to work on me, Piastri.” You shake your head vehemently. “I refuse to get on that death machine. It’s bad enough that you ride it all the time.”
“Come onnnn,” he whines, tugging you up off of the bed and into his arms. 
The two of you look like polar opposites— him with his leather jacket and riding gloves still on, smelling faintly of exhaust, and you in plaid pajama pants and one of his worn out t-shirts. You suppose that’s what makes your relationship work so well, opposites attract and whatever. All relationships take compromise though, and this is one “compromise” that, thus far, you’ve refused to make. 
In your eyes, it’s not a compromise. But Oscar has been asking you to be his “backpack” practically since the two of you met. 
“What do I have to do to convince you?” He’s asking, pressing a chaste kiss to your forehead. 
“Hmm, nothing.” You smile up at him, and it fades just as fast when you see the excitement in his eyes. “Because it’s never going to happen. I like being alive, thank you very much.”
“Baby, you know you’ll be safe with me. I promise I won’t let anything happen to you.” He says sincerely, his pleading tone now gone. “I’ve been riding my entire life. I did all the crashing before I got my license. Haven’t crashed since.”
“Yeah, that makes me feel better.” You mutter, hiding your face in his chest so he can’t see your resolve slowly starting to crumble. 
“It would be so fun,” he continues, arms tightening around your frame as he starts to sway you both side to side a little. “All you’d have to do is hold on to me. I’ll do all the work. You trust me, don’t you?” 
“With all things except the death machine,” you say, voice muffled by the material of his jacket. 
“I love you, but I’m gonna need you to stop calling her ‘the death machine,’ honey.”
“Her?” You look up at him, affronted. “I’m definitely not doing it now. Wouldn’t want to get between you and the other woman in your life.” 
Oscar laughs. His laugh has always been more of a giggle around you, which is such a contrast to his outward appearance that it never fails to make you melt. 
“You’re the only woman for me, which is why you’re the only woman I’ve ever asked to be my backpack.” He says. 
“Don’t try to butter me up with the whole backpack thing again.” You roll your eyes and try to pull away from him, but he somehow manages to twirl you and bring you right back into him. 
“It’s not me buttering you up, I’m just telling the truth. Come on, baby.” he leans in and gives you a long kiss that leaves your head spinning a little. “One time. And if you don’t like it, I promise I won’t ask again.” 
You let out a frustrated groan, because he has to know that he’s won at this point. That kiss was nothing but tactical. “Fine. Fine. But you can’t just kiss me like that every time you want something from me, it’s unfair.” 
“Yes, yes!” He squeezes you into him, kissing the top of your head over and over. “You won’t regret this.”
“I already am a little bit.” You grumble. 
That’s how you find yourself standing on the sidewalk with Oscar in front of you adjusting a helmet on your head. 
“This is making me claustrophobic,” you complain as he flips the visor up so he can see your face. 
“I’m just making sure you’re safe, baby.” When you furrow your eyebrows, he sighs and drops his hands to his sides. “If you really don’t want to do this, you don’t have to, okay?”
This makes you relent a little bit. “Osc, I’m sorry. I’m just scared. I don’t like motorcycles, like, at all.” You smile as best you can with the helmet on, hoping it goes to your eyes so he can see it. “I want to do this. You just… you really have to help me.” 
He nods, the tension in his shoulders dissipating. “Of course, honey. C’mon.”
He takes your hand and leads you over to his motorcycle. While you’re terrified just looking at it, you can’t deny that it’s absolutely beautiful. Streamlined and sleek, like he literally just bought it, even though you know he’d already had it for a year when you first met him. 
He looks almost the same as he did when you first met— all black getup, signature leather jacket, riding gloves, and of course, his strangely colorful helmet that doesn’t match the rest of him. His hair was long when you met him, and you still remember being absolutely starstruck when you saw his face for the first time. It had felt like everything went into slow motion when he took his helmet off, pushed his hair back, and instantly made eye contact with you from where you were just exiting the bookstore. 
Needless to say, you were done for. And now here you are, a year later, letting him help you onto the death machine. 
He never said you had to stop calling it (sorry, her) that if you were thinking it to yourself. 
“You okay? Comfy?” Oscar asks, reaching to adjust your helmet one more time. 
“Yup. Mhmm. Totally.” You nod, not even trying to sound convincing considering your heart is in your throat and he hasn’t even started the engine yet. 
“Great,” he kisses the top of your helmet and smiles at you cutely before climbing onto the bike so he’s seated in front of you. “Just hold on tight, okay baby? Like this.” 
He reaches behind him, grabbing your hands that had been anxiously scratching at the material of your jeans and pulling you forward so your arms are wrapped around his waist. He doesn’t have to say anything else– you’re quick to tighten your hold around him, fingers clutching at the material of his open jacket. You immediately feel your anxieties begin to dissipate as soon as you’re holding onto him, and you shift your whole body forward on the seat so your front is pressed as close as it can be to his back. When he lets out a quiet grunt, you release your grip a little. 
“I’m sorry! Am I holding you too tight?” “No, no,” he huffs out a laugh, patting your thigh. “Do whatever you need to do. Just warn me if you’re planning to suffocate me at all.”
“Listen, Piastri–” you begin, and he cuts you off by twisting around to look at you.
“Okay, I get it, I’m sorry.” He’s giggling now, and you let go of him to smack his helmet. “I’m done, I promise. As long as you feel safe, honey.”
“Come on, let’s go before I chicken out.” You say, quickly reassuming your hold.
It’s times like these where you appreciate just how buff your boyfriend is. He has something of a sleeper build, so one quick glance at him wouldn’t really reveal much, but when you’re pressed up against him like this, you can feel the muscles in his back and shoulders and his abs through his shirt when your hand slips past his jacket. He’s warm and solid against you, and that in itself is comforting enough that you don’t go flying off the seat when he starts up the engine and you instantly feel your whole body start to vibrate from the force of it.
“I’ll check in with you, okay?” He says over the loud rumbling. “Hit me in the head or something and I’ll pull over. Sound good?” Having him to hold on to is nice, but your throat is still dry thinking about all the dastardly possibilities that could occur when the bike starts moving, so you have to swallow a couple times in order for him to hear you over the engine. “Yeah, sounds good.”
Your heart falls out of your ass and lands on the pavement when he pulls out onto the road, the engine roaring as he accelerates. 
“God, please spare me,” you say out loud, grateful that Oscar can’t hear you over the engine. 
As soon as he gets onto the freeway, that’s when you realize just how much fun you’ve been missing out on.
It’s never been a secret to you that Oscar loves going fast. There have been plenty of occasions where you’ll drive somewhere, do whatever it is you have planned, and then you’ll turn to him and ask if he wants to drive home just to give him some peace of mind knowing that the journey back will be cut down by a few minutes at least. Being in the car is fun enough, but being on the back of his motorcycle is different.
You thought you’d be more scared. You’re terrified, sure, but even though you can feel the wind whipping against your clothes and you’re flying past cars on either side of the freeway, you’re holding on to Oscar, and you could easily do that forever. You’re quickly warming up to the concept of being his backpack, and you can feel yourself relaxing your death grip around him. This is actually kind of fun. Okay, really fun. You actually can’t believe you were so adamantly refusing to do this this whole time. 
Every so often, he reaches back with one hand and rubs your thigh, or holds one of your hands that is now tucked comfortably into his jacket pocket. You thought you’d be freaking out about him taking a hand off the handlebars, but he exudes confidence on the bike, and he never wavers no matter what he’s doing with his hands. 
He doesn’t go very far; the whole ride lasts maybe 20 minutes, but it feels like half that with how quick the bike is. Your arms ache from all the muscles in them working the whole time, and when he helps you off the back of the bike your legs feel like jello.
“How was it?” He asks, helping you pull the bulky helmet off your head. 
Your hair falls in your face and he brushes it away for you before you can even lift your hands. He cups your cheeks, a small smile on his face as he admires you.
“We are definitely doing that again.” 
His smile grows, and he places a sweet, adoring kiss on your lips. “I knew I finally found my backpack.” 
Tumblr media
word count: 1,787
masterlist — join my tag list here!
note: writing this has me thinking up a whole biker au for multiple drivers... thank you for this gold mine of a request <33
requests are OPEN, and my inbox is always open for comments, criticism, and conversation! feel free to pop in!
reblogs are always appreciated <33
dividers by @/saradika
tags: @venusacrossthestars @67-angelofthelordme-67 @emails-i-can-send @nelly187 @cixrosie @fangirl-dot-com @sainzluvrr @imheretoread @mellowarcadefun @yourbane @monsieurbacteria6 @c-losur3 @papayatori @ssprayberrythings @namgification @maih23 @evlkking @witchycarmen @ilovethispookie @maxverstappenfan79 @sya-skies @sweatrevenge5436-blog @kimis-gloves @mia-rrrs @decafmickey @customsbyjcg-blog @bigheartsthings
708 notes · View notes
kitcat22 · 28 days
Text
Ok i’ve read a few codywan fics of sad desert hermit obi wan going back in time and trying to fix things but what i really wanna read is longish haired teenage obi wan going to the future where all his friends are dead and supposedly he is too.
Obi wan only lasts a few weeks before he ends up imprisoned by inquisitors, because good as he is, obi wan hasn’t a clue whats going on.
The food is rubbish and the torture isn’t great but at least he gets to meet a nice torguta lady during his escape.
Is ahsoka freaked out at having her grandmaster alive and now younger than her? Yes, yes she is but she ends up taking him back to the rebel base where a lot of very surprised people are waiting including one completely devastated commander Cody.
Having Obi wan back would be a dream come true for him normally but there is a difference between adult Obi wan who Cody was completely in love with and teenage Obi Wan who is forced to live with the knowledge that he is the survivor of a genocide.
Cody is almost happy that his Obi Wan is dead because he doesn’t think he could ever have looked him in the eye again.
Obviously nothing can happen between the two of them since Obi wan is like 16 and Cody is physically and mentally like 60 but theres a lot of guilt and regret on Cody’s part and a lot of confused pining on Obi Wan’s.
He has no clue why his romantic interests have changed from passionate blonde teenage girl to a depressed elderly man who tries to avoid him while also maintaining strangely long eye contact and honestly he’s not sure he wants to know.
There is a lot of guilt involved in trying to send Obi Wan back in time. Because they have to do it. Obi Wan Kenobi is an important historical figure and taking him out of the time stream could have disastrous consequences. They hope that he can change the past for the better, knowing what he knows now but there is a chance he won’t remember any of it and they are sending him back in time just for his own battalion to murder him.
Meanwhile Sad Desert Hermit Obi wan is getting really weird vibes from the force.
486 notes · View notes
buckyalpine · 1 year
Note
I had an idea !!!!! Bucky and best friend reader making out . Not just once . Constantly. When they’re drunk at a party , they find a corner and start making out . When they’re sober and watching a movie , they make out cause the moxie was boring . And if anyone asks ? No they’re not dating . They’re just friends that like to kiss . And not just simple kisses . Sloppy full on make out session ! You can take this and do whatever you want with it
18+
We are talking sloppy sloppy. We are talking lips glossy, swollen and tender. Tongues laced with each other. Hands roaming wherever they want. Tangled in each others hair, up each others shirt, stroking thighs, stroking waists. 
The drunk party set it off. Tequila for you and Asgardian mead for him, you'd both started off with giggling over nothing; neither of you can stop the way your eyes flick to each others lips. 
"M'bored"
You huff and Bucky gets a bright idea, grabbing your waist and dragging you off to the quieter side of the room. 
"Come here" He pulls you into his lap, cupping your cheek, lips brushing against his. You don’t hesitate, parting your lips, letting his tongue slip though, your hands grasping onto his shirt, wishing he could be even closer some how. He shifts so you can straddle him, his hands on your ass, while you run your fingers though his hair, soft moans and whimpers falling from both your lips.
“Isn’t this more fun” Bucky rasps, pulling away for air while you take in a breath, your forehead resting on his. 
“Much better” You giggle, going in for his lips again, which he immediately reciprocates. 
Most of the team see at some point but they shrug it off figuring you’ll both forget any of this happened by morning because everyone’s shit faced. 
Except. 
It’s movie night.
Everyone's sitting around the living room, snacks out, comfy blankets, and the movie is great. It's one of your favorites. But there's something else you'd rather do...
You're sitting beside Bucky in a large beanbag chair, glancing at him every so often, his lips are so much more interesting than anything happening in that movie. He catches you sneakily looking at him and it makes him smirk; he shifts so he can pull you a little closer to him.
"Buckyyy" You pout at him, hoping he can take the hint without you having to say anything. "M'bored"
He grins, tilting your chin up, pressing his lips softly against yours. It's dark enough that no one would really notice unless they looked directly at what you were both doing. You part your lips granting access for his tongue to tangle with yours, his hand moving to grasp the back of your neck. Your hands fist his shirt, tugging on his dog tags to keep him as close as possible, nipping his lip, making him groan. You could stay like this forever and be perfectly content.
Your both so lost in each other, you don't notice the lights turning on after the movie ends. OR screaming and howling coming from the team when they look down and see you sitting right in Bucky's lap, his hands carded through your hair, making out with you like its the one thing that's keeping him alive.
"HOLY SHIT"
"What the-
"WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN?!"
"Do neither of you need oxygen?!"
"Bad Bucky"
You and Bucky yelped, breaking apart, feeling water hitting your face while Tony sprayed you both once more for good measure.
"Bad Bucky. Bad. Down"
"You wanna tell us what that was" Sam wiggled his eye brows while Bucky groaned.
"We were bored" He shrugged, his cheeks skill flushed and lips still plump. You nodded in agreement, while the rest of the team stared at you both. They have so many questions but don't even know where to start so they call it for the night.
Imagine they come down for breakfast and they find you on the counter, your legs wrapped around his waist, both of your plates still left on the counter because you got...busy.... Steve attempts to cough to get you both to stop but Bucky's to distracted, one arm wrapped around your waist, the other tugging your pony tail from your morning run. They all stand and watch for a while, Tony occasionally checks the time, a little impressed with just how long either of you can go without having to break apart for air. Sam finally breaks the silence, mostly because he's hungry.
"Okay, fucks going on with you both"
"What do you mean" Bucky's voice is breathless, his chest heaving. Neither of you even bother to look over, eyes still locked with each other, still glancing at each others lips.
"I've watched porn with less raunchy kissing than this" Tony snorted, while you both kept gazing at each other, clearly itching to jump at each other at any moment.
"We're just friends" Bucky helped you off the counter, hoping to drag you somewhere else because he wasn't done kissing you.
"Friends that kiss" You added, pulling Bucky by his wrist to go and make out somewhere else.
"I'm putting you both in separate cages!"
A few years later
"We are in the house of God, don't you dare pull that shit up here"
"I have no idea what you're talking about" Bucky snorted while Tony shook his head, rolling his eyes. Bucky could feel his heart race, while Steve squeezed his shoulder reassuringly.
“I will pull out the spray bottle”
"You look gorgeous doll" Bucky whispered, holding your hands in his, itching to do the one thing he wanted to do so badly the moment he saw you that day, just a second longer...
"You may now kiss the bride"
His hands wrapped around your waist pulling you close, his lips smashing against yours. Your hands cupped his cheeks, moving your lips softly with his, the crowd erupting into cheers and happy tears while you both stayed lost in each other. 
"I told you not to pull that shit up here!" Sam sniffled, grabbing a tissue from Steve, watching you both still softly kissing each other, unable to stop the little pecks and nips on each others lips. You finally broke apart, still giving each other heart eyes; no one else stole his breath away like you did. 
"Friends that kiss, huh?"
Tags:
@glxwingrxse  @hungryyeyess  @sebsgirl71479  @beabutterfly987  @teambarnes72  @witchywhore @jamesbuckybarneswify @slutforsexyseabass  @chrisdrysdale @littlemarvelmenfan  @buggy14  @whimsyplaty92  @sergntbarnes @inkedaztec   @pono-pura-vida   @moonlightreader649 @brooklynscherry-z  @elle14-blog1 @justsebstan @littlelightnings @psychomanniac-blog  @happyt0exist   @emmabarnes  @bethyruth @matchat3a  @cjand10   @getwellsoontana  @cherryschaos   @lokisasgardianvampirequeen  @ashenc-blog  @buckybarnessimpp   @potatothots  @goldylions  @high-functioning-lokipath @morganemorganite-blog  @kingfleury   @peaches1958   @spiderman-stilinski   @peaceinourtime82  @gublur   @wintersmelodie @geeky-politics-46   @lolawassad  @almosttoopizza   @a-poor-gryffindork @alternativeprincess   @buckycallsmeaslut    @kamaria-sweet-writes  @charmedbysarge    @xnorthstar3x  @kryoee7 @alina02  @gh0stgurl    @batprincess1013 @polishprincess999 @jessybarnes @alltheficsiwant
4K notes · View notes
stewykablooey · 1 year
Text
yeah we’re right to make the dickmatized jokes about stewy going against his better judgement to back kendall Again. but this time it’s honestly fucking miserable. stewy has been trying to get kendall out since the beginning, since before the beginning, and then here he is at logans funeral and kendall wants back in. stewy backing him for ceo, yes was him letting kendall pull the friend card and yes was him letting his feelings cloud his judgement and yes was him being dickmatized to a dishonorable degree, but its also like. logan is dead. logan is dead and the company’s not in family control anymore and ken is halfway out the door and he has something good going on. logan is dead and one piece of paper has kendall diving back in. stewy’s been trying to get kendall out of logans control from the start and logan is dead and ken should be free but they’re at his funeral and kendall wants back in. ‘ken is your head on straight?’ genuinely i was surprised that he backed him because stewy wouldnt. because it makes bad business sense and because stewy doesnt want kendall at waystar in the first place. ‘what in it for me, ken?’ he wouldn’t do this but at this point its a resignation. its a last resort. i couldnt get you out when he was alive and now he’s dead and i still cant get you out so i’ll help you get it in because this is the last way i know how to help you at all. ‘i dont wanna live in a haunted house, kendall tells stewy, unaware that he already is, oblivious to the ghosts lurking around them both. they were fucking right. it IS around them both. in kendall’s haunted house the ghost is logan. in stewy’s haunted house the ghost is kendall.
2K notes · View notes
tarotwithavi · 1 year
Text
You from the eyes of your future lover / future spouse.
How would your future spouse describe you? How would they see you?
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
Piles : 1~2~3
For my females audience so I'll be using she/her pronounce in this post.
Masterlist
Paid services
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
Pile 1
She's the reason for my happiness. She is perfect in every sense. She fills my heart with so much emotions that it scares me sometimes. I can't imagine ever hurting her. I love her so much that it hurts sometimes. God if there's an afterlife please keep us together forever. I beg you. She's just so perfect and spontaneous. There's nothing she can't do. She makes the impossible become possible. She's magical. Well sometimes she's energetic and joyful and other times her mind seems to be all over the place. I love it she gets annoyed haha. She's a just to cute . I love how talented she is. She is intelligent but she's stupid. She's stupid because she doesn't see her beauty and her perfection. I never thought I would feel these emotions. She makes me feels mushy. Just the thought of her bring smile to my face. She's the light of my life. Without her my life would be in darkness. I wanna paint my world the the color of her skin. I wanna tattoo her smile on my body. Her voice is the only thing I wanna hear. Her laughter is my favorite melody. I would cherish it forever. God I love her so much it's driving me crazy.
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
Pile 2
Who's she? Well she's my destiny. She is my begining and she is my end. She makes me feel like a child again. She's my other better half. These gushy-mushy feelings are all because of her. She is the reason I became a better person. She is the person I have been waiting for the my whole life. There's nothing more I want than to have a family with her. Just me, her and our pets. I imagine living with her and dying with her. I even want to be next to her in the casket. I love her to death. God knows I have never cared about the future but with her , I just feel as if I need to plan everything. I'm willing to go wherever she takes me to even if it's my death. With her I never feel scared or anxious. She brings me peace. I feel as if I can finally breathe after being suffocated my whole life. She's my morning coffee . she's my late night snack. she's like a cold breeze on a hot summer day. She's my sun, she's my moon and she's my star. She's everything. I wish she could see herself from my eyes, to see just how beautiful and mesmerizing she is. I want to express how much she means to me but I don't think I have right words for it. I want to make her my queen.
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
Pile 3
She's crazy but she's mine. She's childish, she's goofy, she's a like a small kitten. Sometimes I just want to pull her cheeks so hard but I know she'll bite me. Oh how much I love her but she's stupid. She's not stupid stupid but she's hilariously stupid. She makes me laugh till I have tears in my eyes. She's like my personal comedian. She's my life long best friend. I am sure we'll never get old together. We will forever be high school sweethearts. She makes me feel alive. She makes my world light up. I love it when she argues with me. I love it when she gets annoyed with my pranks. Her face is so expressive that I can't help but laugh at her expressions. Oh how she's always in her own little world, how she's zones out when she wakes up. How she's ties her hair in a messy bun. How she runs like a child around the house. How she thinks she lives in her own fantasy world. How she unknowingly pouts while eating. How her eyebrows go up when she's surprised. I love her crazy ideas. She's a mystery that i wanna solve. I want to know where she goes when she zones out. I want her to take me with her where she goes , in her world. Where it's just us and no one else.
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
Hope you like it! And leave a note to show support ♡ Have a great day ahead !
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
2K notes · View notes
mcrslover · 25 days
Text
MCR quotes for anyone who needs them:
"Kids would say they were going to kill themselves then they heard our music... it's our mission"
- Mikey Way.
...
"Reasons why mcr is good for you
juradsleigh:
Feeling like a rad vampire? Listen to bullets
Feeling angry? Listen to 3 cheers
Feeling sad? Listen to black parade
Feeling colourful and happy? Listen to danger days
Feeling like breaking up your band? Listen to death never stop you"
...
"This is for every kid out there... That dyed their hair a fucked up colour and can't get a job. They got a tattoo on their neck like Frank, and can't get a job. That does this because they fuckin' love this. This song is for every kid in the audience- even if you don't have fucked up hair or tattoos-every kid on stage, this song's about us, this song's about you, it's called The Kids From Yesterday."
- Gerard Way.
...
"Stop covering your children's eyes.
Everything is fucked up and pretending it's not won't make it any better. I'm tired of people praying for a change when it's up to them to get off their asses and make a change."
- Frank Iero.
...
"I spent most of my time in the back of the class, just drawing. My goal was to not get noticed in school, because spent so long not being noticed anyway or being treated as if I were invisible that I started to like it.
I've learned that it's actually not very lonely... It's like, you have less friends but the friends you have count more. I met a lot of people that weren't outsiders, or they were very popular, and they have a lot of friends but I don't know if they're the kinds of friends you would call up at 3 am to help you out or talk about being depressed."
- Gerard Way.
...
"Promise me, when MCR's gone, you'll do what it takes to survive. You're strong enough to do it without us."
- Gerard Way.
...
"All your quirks and all your problems, even your depressions, and your failures that's.. that's what makes you, you."
- Gerard Way.
...
"If you or someone you know is severely depressed you need to fucking talk to someone! Your mom, someone in school, I don't give a fuck! Because suicide is fucking bullshit."
- Gerard Way.
...
"Being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect. It means that you've decided to look beyond the imperfections."
- Gerard Way.
...
"Nothing is worth hurting yourself over, nothing is worth taking your life over"
- Gerard Way.
...
"If we never play another show again, just keep yourself alive."
- Gerard Way.
...
"We're outsiders, we're the kids who didn't get dates for the prom, we're the kids who were confused, who didn't fit in with the cliques, who weren't part of the in-crowd.
Growing up can be a very frightening and confusing time, and I think people look at us and see it's okay to be different. They see that there is a way other than what they're being offered. That you can stand out, that you can be creative, that you can be yourself."
- Gerard Way.
...
"gerard-hey:
I love MCR so much it's like they have a song for every situation. Feeling sad? Listen to The Lights Behind Your Eyes. Feeling frustrated? Listen to I'm Not Okay. Feeling Energetic? Listen to Na Na Na. Feeling like you wanna kick some ass? Listen to Destroya.
Feeling rebellious? Listen to Teenagers. Feel like you wanna break up your band? Listen to Fake Your Death."
...
"The difference we want to make is, number one, to let these kids know that they're not alone, that they're actually not that messed up, and that they can do whatever they want they can express themselves in any way they want without being persecuted or called a faggot or some kind of racist thing. Really just get people to get over their stuff so they can live."
- Gerard Way.
...
"Whatever happens to you, no matter what, l'm always fucking there for you... Don't forget that. I don't give a shit if your boyfriend dumps you. If your girlfriend dumps you. If you're working a shitty job or can't get through school. If you can't get through a fucking Harry Potter book, there's nothing worth dying over. There's nothing worth taking your life over. I will always fucking be there."
- Gerard Way.
...
"If you come to an MCR show, you're probably a little fucked up, and that's okay because we're just as fucked up as you. It's us against the world. And it's great because there's thousands of us in one place."
- Gerard Way.
...
"Someone doesn't like you? Fuck it.
Having a bad day? Fuck it. Didn't get that job, or that grade, or that promotion you wanted? Fuck it. Fighting with your lover? Fuck it. Feel fat today? Fuck it. Losing control of everything and everyone? Fuck it.
What matters now won't matter soon; the truly important thing is that you are alive, and that you have the capacity to do absolutely anything with this beautiful, crazy coincidence of being on this earth. Just stick your middle fingers in the air and think, 'Damn, I have it good."
- Gerard Way.
...
"You're going to come across a lot of shitty bands, and a lot of shitty people. And if anyone of those people call your names because of what you look like, or bedause they don't accept you for who you are. I want you to look right at that mother fucker, stick up your middle finger and scream
"FUCK YOU!!"
- Gerard Way.
...
"Real revenge is making something of yourself."
- Gerard Way.
❤️🖤❤️🖤
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
379 notes · View notes
dickmastersfruit · 5 days
Note
i dont even know how to ask this because i just want one thing well two actually u change my mind alastor without his jacket all messy like (you know what i mean) AND HIS HAIR UP IN A LITTLE PONYTAIL OR BUN IDC IDK ITS JUST UP AND IM DROOLING
Im gonna eat you
Pairing: Alastor x F!reader
Warnings: the only warning is the fact that i wrote this at 3 am so enough said.. but also there lowkey really horny...
Wordcount: 524
Note: Eveytime i see art of this man with his hair up lord have mercy.. id devour him actually.
Tumblr media
You have known Alastor for a long time now. You had met him while you were both still alive. Although there were bans on alcohol at the time, you were able to sneak your way into a speakeasy. You sat at the damp gross bar waiting for the man to serve you. Of course being a woman he took his sweet time before ever asking you what you’d like. However a tall slender man walked up to you. He was wearing all red and wore a smirk that seemed to never leave his lips. After a night of drinking and doing things a lady shouldn't have done you went home fulfilled… and filled. To your dismay never seeing the man again.
That was until you ended up in hell for a cute murdering spree or whatever. You walked around aimlessly before bumping into two girls by accident. The girl with long blonde hair apologized frantically which just made you stare at her annoyed. You hated overly happy people. Of course the happy girl asked you to her hotel in which you totally thought she was trying to have a threesome, but really she was just being nice.
After months of living in this hotel and ‘trying’ to get better so you could be redeemed. Which you thought was a load of bullshit because why would you wanna get better when you're already better than everyone. During those months though you had gotten very close to Alastor. You had spent many nights with him, not always of sexual nature of course. 
One morning though you woke up and you quickly realized he was gone from your bed. Which wasn’t normal usually after being with you he wanted to be as close as possible. You looked around the room to see if maybe he just decided not to sit on the bed. Your eyes widened as he came out of the bathroom with no shirt on and just pants. To make matters worse he had his hair in a little ponytail. His hair wasn’t quite long enough to have all his hair up so there were little bits sticking off the side and sticking out from under where it was pulled up. You stared at him like you could have devoured him right in that moment.
“What” His staticy voice broke you out of your thoughts. He slowly walked toward you, joining you in bed again. He began talking about god knows what but you could focus on his hair at this moment.
“This is new” You say, interrupting him, reaching your hand up to his hair. “Very hot” You breath heavily watching him, watching how he sat there so slutty without even realizing.
His head whipped to you as he realized how you were ogling him like some object. “You think?” He whispered sultrily as his hand came up to grip your throat. 
You let out a whimper as he brings your face to his before kissing you slowly. So slow it almost hurt how badly you wanted him at that moment. You were aching for his attention, attention only he could ever give you.
Masterlist Alastor Masterlist
130 notes · View notes
lvlyghost · 9 months
Note
Hi I just read your “The Things I Never Said” oneshot and loved it. Can I get a kind of opposite version where Simon wishes to be a dad but the reader never wants to be a mom so she freaks out and gets an abortion with out Simons knowledge and later he somehow finds out? Maybe angst to fluff? Totally ignore this if you dont want to, have a wonderful day/night.
The Things I Wish I Said
Pairings: Simon "Ghost" Riley x F!Reader
Summary: You decide to end things with Simon after what you did.
Word Count: 1.7k
Tw: hurt, comfort, angry simon, angst, implied abortion. Not proofread.Think that's it but lmk if i missed anything!🐸
A/N: here it is! I hope this doesn't disappoint and that it lives up to your expectations 😰🤞🏻 I really enjoyed writing this one and since it's similar to my previous fic decided to name it quite similar. ✨💞
Masterlist✨Masterpost
Tumblr media
He doesn't know. You stare at Simon's gargantuan body as he barks orders to the new recruits. Things have been rather... tense lately. And it's all because of you.
Yesterday had taken a toll on you. A big piece of your heart and soul lost forever in that godamn clinic. You can still smell the perfume of the nurse, feel the hands of the doctor as he tried to comfort you. You're deadly pale, tired and numb. That's why you're sitting on the other side of the field, watching the rest of your team training as usual. Nothing changes for them. You on the other hand? Can't even look at Simon in the eyes. Not anymore. The one thing he wanted the most was also the one you were the most reluctant to. It just wasn't you.
You didn't have it in your DNA. To be a mother. To carry a baby in your arms. And not because you're selfish, but you had decided a long time ago that having children was off the table.
Even when everybody would say 'you'll change your mind when you find the one'. Well it was a blatant lie because you found him. You loved Simon. You'd do whatever he asked of you. Just not this. And you hate yourself for it.
You lied to him and didn't mention anything. Didn't tell him you were pregnant with his offspring.
Couldn't even bare to maintain a conversation with him. And he's starting to notice the way your body startles when he reaches out to you. How you avoid his gaze or not kiss him anymore.
"Feeling better?" He questions, strong arms crossed. Simon doesn't fully look down where you sit but side eyes you. He awaits. You're looking out to the field, ignoring his presence as you swallow the lump in your throat.
"Not really, Lieutenant." You simply add, in a hushed tone.
He sighs but doesn't move, starting to lose his patience. He's trying so hard to understand why you're acting like this. He's preoccupied. Anxious. Yet doesn't let it show, remaining stoic as ever.
"Wanna talk about it, Sergeant?" Biting down on your lip and fidgeting with your hands you shake your head. Simon rubs his face, annoyed that whatever the fuck is happening is driving the both of you apart, so he sits down on the bench next to you. "What is it?" He turns his head to you. Arms resting on his knees.
"Simon..." you warn him with a sad tone.
"No. That's an order."
"Sir, we're done here..." One of the recruits shouts from the other side.
"You bloody keep going until I tell you to stop!" He seethes, making you flinch.
Resting your head on your hands, start thinking about the inevitable. About what you're going to do. Your heartbeat racing when you feel his eyes on you again.
"Simon..." you say. "I... I- don't think we should be together right now." It hurts deep inside because all that's left is the rustling of wind and the voices of the soldiers around. You don't turn to see his reaction, probably wouldn't be able to stand it. It's not because you didn't love him. In fact, you loved him more than he could imagine. It's what you did behind his back what's eating you alive. And the best way you can seem to cope with it is to leave him.
Not a sound comes from him for the next few seconds. Until you finally find the courage to look his way. Blue eyes scan your body.
"As you wish, kid." He whispers. You can't see it but he's already spiraling down to a dark place.
The one good thing he had...
-
"I've had enough!" Soap's voice booms in the hallway and then your door bursts open. You shriek, standing up from the bed. "I can't stand it anymore lass. You've gotta talk to him." He says.
"Johnny... we've talked about this." You murmur.
"No. I'm being serious! Ghost is more irritated than usual, he almost punched me for saying he needed to get laid. The bloody hell happened to you both?" His eyebrows furrow. "You need to figure this out, otherwise..."
"It's complicated." You deadpan.
"Well then bloody make it right! Steaming fucking Jesus you two acting like fucking children. Grow the hell up."
You had never seen Johnny this mad.
Of course you were aware of Ghost's attitude since you two broke up. And it's only been three weeks. You've been attending the military counselor since then, it's a sorrowful feeling when you think about Simon, while you talk about him. About what led to the end of your relationship or whatever it was that you two had going on.
"I believe what you went through was hard and painful. But I do think that he deserves an answer." she had insisted. "He needs to know."
It was easier said than done. Every time you thought about going to his room or wherever he'd be you got this uneasy feeling, like he somehow despised you now. That all the soft smiles and gentle caressing that were once just for you had turned into frowns and harsh commands. Dismissing you whenever you showed up to training. Not even making eye contact during debriefs. Walking right past you in the corridor. You can't help but wonder if the baby's eyes would've been more like him or yours.
Stop.
The counselor said it was a type of ptsd and that therapy would help you get through it.
"The first step is to let yourself feel that pain, make amends with it, and then go see him."
"I'll try to talk to him Johnny. I promise." You murmur, jaw clenching.
The mere thought of going to speak to Simon made your hands sweat and your heart beat frantically.
Three days after the conversation with Soap, you stand in front of Simon's bedroom door. Blinking rapidly as your mind races with all the things you ought to say. It's almost one in the morning, unable to sleep you decided the conversation couldn't wait any longer. You couldn't wait anymore. Swallowing down saliva you raise your hand, two soft knocks on the door echoing in the empty hallway and you wait patiently, fumbling with your hands as the anxiety begins to raise.
Simon doesn't open so you knock again two times only to be greeted by more silence and a loud thunder outside in the sky.
A quiet huff leaves your mouth as you turn on your heel and leave. Wandering around the compound with no clear direction. It's dead silent, you're left with your own self destructive thoughts as you walk past the gym. A low thud can be heard from behind the doors so you backtrack and take a glimpse through the window.
Why is he at the gym at this ungodly hour?
Pushing past the door you walk sluggishly, Simon's quick to notice the disturbance, ready to snap at whomever is here to interrupt his midnight routine. It's been like this for weeks now; not being able to sleep. The nightmares that had disappeared for the most part came back with full force.
There's a hollow feeling inside of him ever since you decided to call it quits. He doesn't fucking understand, he's mad. Furious even. Can't help the anger whenever he wakes up and you're not there anymore. Can't bear the sight of you during debriefings and not even looking his way. The way you freeze when he has to order you around.
Had he done anything to make you fearful of him?
He needed to know, he needs answers. He'd ask tomorrow. He swears. Whatever it was. Then he'll walk away.
He stands from where he was about to start the second round of push-ups. Simon's able to recognize your silhouette with the lights off, he just knows you that well. Wherever you were, in a sea full of people he'd know it's you even then.
"Sorry..." you murmur. Simon's looking at you over his left shoulder through the mirror in front of him, you stand a few steps behind him. "I didn't mean to interrupt."
He stays silent. It's now that you come to realize that he isn't wearing the mask, instead lies on the room floor, discarded. "Was looking for you in your room but-"
"Say it." He barks, turning around and stalking towards you. His presence alone making you feel smaller. His brows are knitted, jaw clenched so hard you're sure he'll break his teeth. Simon is massive. Yet, despite all of this you know he'd never lay a finger on you, nor hurt you. "Fucking start talking, kid." The hurt in his voice is palpable. You fumble with your hands, it's getting harder to keep your eyes on his. You do not deserve his love at all. "Because I've been losing my mind ever since you shut me out."
A soft wail escapes your lips, you try to muffle it. Simon hesitates for a second. Wanting nothing more than to hold you in his arms, he awaits.
"I... I- got pregnant." You cried. "And you've always known I never wanted that. I panicked and didn't say a word because it would be more painful or...-" you swallow through incessant tears. "Or so I thought. I decided to get rid of it, Simon. But seeing what's done to us. What I've done... I'm so fucking sorry I don't deserve-"
Suddenly you're engulfed by strong arms and a broad chest as you finally let go and cry rivers of pain and regret. He's murmuring sweet things in your ear that you can't understand die to your deteriorating situation.
"It's okay. It's okay, love. Fucking hell, should've come to me." He growled. "Don't you ever do this to me again, kid. You didn't have to do it alone. Christ."
There's a soft kiss on the top of your head as your cries start to die down and all there's left are soft whimpers.
"I never meant to leave you, but I couldn't be close to you after what I did behind your back." You sniff.
The ever gentle caressing of his thumb on your back never ceases, providing the comfort you so desperately seek.
"S'alright, love. Nothing to be sorry about." He takes a step back keeping you at arms length. "There she is." A little broken but starting to be pieced back together. He gently wipes your cheeks and breathes deep. "I'm here. Always."
795 notes · View notes
songtwo · 2 months
Text
joni mitchell was right i am on a lonely road and i am traveling, traveling, traveling, traveling looking for something, what can it be? oh, I hate you some, I hate you some, I love you some oh, I love you when I forget about me i wanna be strong, I wanna laugh along i wanna belong to the living alive, alive, I want to get up and jive i want to wreck my stockings in some jukebox dive do you want, do you want, do you wanna dance with me baby? do you wanna take a chance on maybe finding some sweet romance with me, baby? Well come on all I really, really want our love to do is to bring out the best in me and in you too all I really, really want our love to do is to bring out the best in me and in you i wanna talk to you, I wanna shampoo you i wanna renew you again and again applause, applause, life is our cause when I think of your kisses my mind see-saws do you see, do you see, do you see how you hurt me, baby? so I hurt you too then we both get so blue i am on a lonely road and I am traveling looking for the key to set me free oh the jealousy the greed is the unraveling it's the unraveling and it undoes all the joy that could be i wanna have fun, I wanna shine like the sun wanna be the one that you want to see i wanna knit you a sweater i wanna write you a love letter i wanna make you feel better i wanna make you feel free wanna make you feel all free i wanna make you feel free
194 notes · View notes
eisdendrobium · 3 months
Note
SINGER SCARA HAS ME GONNA SOB AND I WANNA KISS HIM
Can I request a part two where he talks to you wether it’s closure or u still loving him <3
mind over matter pt.2
pairings : singer!scaramouche x reader summary : seeing you at his concert after years apart made him regret his actions more, wishing that you'd give him a second chance. read pt.1 here !
Tumblr media
the concert has ended, scaramouche wave his hands and smiles at his fans, bidding them his goodbye as he exits the stage and the crowd gradually leaving.
right after he enters the backstage scaramouche grab the first guard he sees and ask him to get a certain person from the crowd to meet him which the guard comply without asking.
scaramouche sat down on his chair, grabbing a water bottle and shakily chugging it empty.
his stomach churns at the thought of seeing you again. beads of sweats dripping down his forehead.
a few moments later the guard came to the backstage with you who looks rather anxious as well.
"the person you asked sir" the guard says as he gesture you to enter the backstage.
scaramouche lifts his head to look at you, surprise that he's still alive with how rapid his heart his beating.
you standing there awkwardly, not knowing what to do and just wait for him to start talking was making the atmosphere more suffocating for scaramouche.
he stands up immediately after the guard left and the name that he longed for finally escape his mouth "[name]..."
"scara" you respond as well "you wanted to see me?"
he tenses and coughs "y-yeah.. i uh.. didn't expect you'd attend my concert" he says awkwardly, looking back at you.
you smile awkwardly "well here i am"
"...." there was an awkward silence before scaramouche finally ask the question that has been bothering him.
"...why did you came?"
you chuckle lightly and shrugs "i'm a fan"
a shocked expression make its way to scaramouche's face "really?"
"yeah, always have been from the beginning, since.." "..since we dated" scaramouche continue your sentence that you're unable to finish.
"yeah.." the situation is very awkward now, it was making the both of you uncomfortable.
"is there any reason you wanted to see me again scara?"
mustering up the courage scaramouche ask the one question that he had waited so long to ask "i just thought... maybe we could try again?" "what?" "i know! i know i said i wanted to focus on my dream and you're just a distraction but i regret it, i regret every single part of my decision to leave you [name]" he explain desperately.
"i know i don't deserve a second chance after how awful i treated you, but please, if you could... give me another chance, i promise i'll be better.. i can't live without you [name]"
you open your mouth to say something but nothing came out for his explanation had made you speechless.
noticing your lack of respond scaramouche decides to continue "do you still love me [name]..? be honest with me" he begs, as if he's standing on thin line.
"...honestly, i never stopped loving you scara" i breathe out which made scaramouche felt like a heavy weight has been lifted from his chest.
"really?"
"yeah.. why'd you think i'm still supporting you if i don't love you anymore scara? even when your decision hurt me greatly i understand that your dream is more important to you, and honestly watching you thrive and grow made me love you more"
you could visibly sees the way scaramouche face turns beet red at your confession.
"then.. will you be an angel you are and give us a second chance to be better?" he ask hopefully.
"are you seriously still gonna ask that after all that i said?" i raise my eyebrows at him disappointedly.
he grins and let out a sigh of relieve before rushing towards you and embracing you into a big warm hug. a few tears even fell from his eyes as he felt your figure close to him again.
you laugh lightly at his action "stop it scara, you're making me cry too" you into his glassy eyes, making him cry more.
"i'm sorry, i just missed you so much" he bawl his eyes out, hiding his face on the crook of your neck, wetting your clothes.
you gently rub circles on his back, eyes turning slightly glassy as well "missed you too you big baby.. don't leave me again okay?"
he nods his head "promise.." he answer, his voice slightly cracking which made you giggle.
finally, after years apart, after all that misery, you're finally his again and he's finally yours again.
a/n : reblogs and likes are greatly appreciated! also feel free to give feedbacks about my work ^^
203 notes · View notes
osleeplessflowero · 4 months
Text
Tumblr media
💜 Reader has They/Them pronouns and their appearance is entirely up to you! ❌ The skeletons will not be entirely canon accurate and will have a few of my headcanons attached. I hope they're still enjoyable! Sequel to this oneshot. ❣️ Sanses belong to their respective owners. All I own is the writing. WORDS: 1,589
🌨️❄️ SNOW DAY! ☃️🧊
Snow gently falls from the sky, hitting the ground and covering it with a pure white, cold blanket. It fogs up the windows, freezing them. Trees have icicles on their branches.
Nightmare's garden has been covered up for the season, the roses and other flowers being kept alive inside a magical greenhouse.
A fireplace crackles in the main living room, its warmth filling the castle.
You sit up in your bed, sliding off of it and walking over to the window, rubbing your eyes to wake up a bit better before looking outside. Upon seeing the snow, you comically press your face up against the glass before excitedly walking to the door, sliding on some slippers of choice and exiting your room.
It's SNOWING!
You rush to Killer's door, tapping on it rapidly until he slides it open.
"you have really gotta stop doing that so early." He yawns, stretching and cracking his bones a little.
"You know you love seeing me in the morning." You smile smugly.
"hmmm.. i guess so."
You gasp, mocking offense. "You guess? You wound me, Killer, such a heartbreaker.."
He snickers, putting his hand up to his mouth.
You put the back of your hand against your forehead, leaning back dramatically. "Whatever could I do?"
"you could tell me why you woke me up this early again, for starters."
"Oh yeah-" You stand up straight again. "It's SNOWING outside!" You grin, bouncing slightly in place.
"..okay and?"
"Killer, it's SNOW- we could do all kinds of things out there- we could have snowball fights, we could build snowpeople, we could do a LOTTA things-"
"ehh, when you grow up surrounded by snow it loses a lot of its appeal."
"C'monnn, don't you wanna hang out with me? Doesn't have to be for too long, but I think it could be fun. Why not give it a chance?" You smile pleadingly, pressing your hands together. He looks you over, seemingly contemplating, before sighing and giving in.
"fine, but don't expect me to stay for too long."
"I'll take it." You smile warmly.
"what's goin' on over here?" Dust walks over, taking a sip of coffee.
You make grabby hands, and he shakes his head. "no, get your own. answer me."
"well, they wanna go out and spend some time in the snow today."
"yeah? how come?"
"Because it could be fun- and it means group bonding time."
"what's gotten you all motivated for group bonding stuff?"
"I dunno. I just wanna spend time with my favorite people all together. Is that so bad?"
Dust and Killer look at each other, before sighing and smiling at you.
"i guess one day couldn't hurt, right killer?" "yeah. only doing this for them though."
You smile smugly, before Horror's door opens.
"why are you all so loud so early."
"Good morning, Horror." You smile at him, and he smiles a little in return. "..mornin'. what's goin' on?"
"We're gonna go out and have a snow day. Wanna join us?" "do i have to stand next to them?" "No, you can stand wherever you want." "then i'm in."
"you wound us, horror." Killer pretends to wipe away a tear. "literally could not give less of a shit." Horror deadpans, before you motion for everyone to follow you to the kitchen.
You get some more coffee started, chatting with everyone about old missions and other things like that, pouring cups for everyone. You hear a large set of doors open and close, peeking your head out of the kitchen to see Nightmare approaching.
"Morning, Night." You smile at him. "Morning. What's going on?" "We're all just having coffee right now, but we're gonna go have some fun in the snow later." "Why would you wanna go out there if it's freezing? Humans are vulnerable to frostbite, and snow's annoying to get off of your clothes. Just gets them all wet, too." He scrunches up his face. "C'monnn, there's lots of fun to be had out there. Why don't you join us? You might like itttt." "If I agree will you stop pestering me about it?" "Yes." You blink innocently. "Fine. But only for a little while." He puts his hand on your head, messing up your hair before going into the kitchen to get some coffee for himself.
You fist pump, going back as well.
After a few more minutes of conversation, you go back to your room to find much warmer clothes for yourself, knowing that since they're skeletons they don't feel the cold. You, however, are not immune to frostbite, and need protection.
Once you've properly bundled up, you walk out of your room and go into Killer's.
"Rate the fit-" "gimme a 360."
You spin around in a circle before striking a pose.
"9/10, should've went with a little more red." "You would say that." You snicker, walking out with him. He holds your hand as you walk, much less to keep up and more just because he wanted to.
You reach the living room where the other three are waiting by the fire for you, greeting them and heading out.
Snow crunches under your shoes as you walk, feeling it hit your head and making your cheeks a little flushed.
Killer walks casually beside Dust, who has his hands in his pockets. Horror lets some snow fall on his hand silently for a bit. Nightmare just walks next to you, a neutral look on his face.
You try to think of what to do first, then get an idea and smile deviously.
While the others are distracted, you reach down and pick up some snow, forming it into a ball and holding your hands behind your back.
"Oh Killerrrr.. I have a gift for you." "is it the gift of your undying love and affection for me?" He puts his hands on his cheeks, shooting you a wink. "Killer, you already know that I love you. But that's not it. THIS IS-"
You hit him right in the face with a snowball, then run for dear life.
"ohohoho, you are SO GONNA GET IT-" He runs after you, forming a snowball himself. You let out a scream, but in truth, you're not actually scared. It's one of excitement.
Nightmare shakes his head, watching in slight amusement.
"you gonna get in on that, boss?" Dust asks, standing beside him. "Absolutely not. I'd rather not have snow hurled at my face." "they seem to be having a lot of fun th-"
Dust gets hit in the face with a snowball. Followed by a "SORRY DUST-" in the distance.
"sorry to cut this short, boss, but this is a declaration of war-" "Go on."
He runs off, picking up snow in both hands and making two snowballs, chasing you both down. Horror looks at Nightmare, Nightmare sharing a look back, before Horror just leaves him to himself and joins the fight.
Walls are built, alliances made, betrayals were common.
You had a blast, aiming another snowball at Killer and throwing it before he ducks..and it hits Nightmare.
You feel yourself tense, the others stare at him. Killer looks like he's about to burst out laughing, Dust puts his hand to his teeth, and Horror..honestly doesn't care.
"Now look what you've done." "Nightmare, I-" "YOU DARE DECLARE WAR ON THE KING OF NEGATIVITY?"
He charges at you with a malicious grin, you playfully screaming and running as the others join in an all-out battle. You feel proud that you managed to get him to join in on the fun this time.
Once you all tire yourselves out, you focus your attention on snowpeople building. (After you take the time to go inside and get some extra parts to decorate them, that is.)
You make yours a silly fellow, a rather gentlemanly specimen indeed. You then make a much smaller gentleman to keep him company.
Killer makes sure to sculpt his properly, adding the classic carrot nose and a few pieces of clothing like a hat and scarf.
Dust..okay that's a pile of snow with his name written on it. Doesn't count.
Horror makes a bigger snowperson, carefully crafting details onto it, making small patterns in the snow with his sharp fingers. You give him some assistance, suggesting what to add to certain parts.
Nightmare adjusts yours when you aren't looking, sprucing it up a little and fixing its hat when it begins to slide off.
"Okay, I think it's time to go back inside. Their face is getting a bit too flushed. I wouldn't want to risk frostbite."
"Aww, okay. We should do this again if it snows tomorrow. Maybe we could go ice skating that time- I bet I could skate better than youu-" "Sure, we'll go with that." "You doubt my skills?" "I do doubt your skills."
You scoff, nudging Nightmare's shoulder as you all walk back. He simply grins at you.
You change out of your wet clothes, putting on some warm pajamas and going to sit in the living room with everyone. Nightmare sits to your right at the end of the couch, Killer on your left. Dust sits in a recliner, and Horror sits in front of you on the floor. You lean a bit on Nightmare as a movie starts, tracing lines on Horror's skull with your hand and taking an occasional sip of hot chocolate.
After a few jokes and discussions, you feel yourself getting tired, falling asleep right in the same spot. Feeling perfectly comfortable with your favorite skellies around.
173 notes · View notes
jasntodds · 4 months
Text
Broken Heart Of Gold [J.T.]
Tumblr media
Pairing: Jason Todd x GN!Reader
Request: yes, here
Summary: After Jason messes up on a mission, he goes to you
Warnings: Swearing, hurt/comfort, mentions of injuries, self-deprecating thoughts (jason), mentions of previous homelessness, mentions of death
Words: 2,514
A/n: I was listening to You Are Enough by Citizen Soldier and Broken Heart Of Gold by One OK Rock so here we are lol I also have another fic similar to this here because I will write this concept a million times if no one stops me. If you wanna be tagged in my fics, you can click the link below, send me an ask/comment, or follow my library blog @jasntoddslibrary and turn on notifications if you prefer that!!
masterlist | request info | tag list
Tumblr media
He’s been doing this for years. He was just thirteen when he first put on the Robin suit. And it was magical.
Being Robin always made Jason feel like he was magic. He was invincible and strong and worthy and enough and important. He had a purpose. For so much of his life, he was the one taking care of his mom and then she died. She died and it left him cold and alone and on the streets. But Robin brought him importance and safety and warmth. Being Robin meant he lived in a home where he was cared for and never asked to care for them. Not that he ever minded caring for his mom because he never did. But it was nice not having to take care of himself, even if he always did anyway. Being Robin gave him freedom and he got to kick ass. He got to go out there and he got to help Batman bring down some of the worst of the worst. He was enough and important. And worthy. But he wasn’t invincible. Because the Joker killed him.
He died and that was that. Robin wasn’t magic or invincible. Robin was just some kid in a mask and cape. But, then a betrayal to death and fate happened and Jason’s alive again. He came back and became Red Hood because the Joker was alive and well, Bruce had a new Robin, and the world left Jason behind.
He came back and it’s as if he wasn’t even wanted. He became Red Hood for people like him. The ones left behind. The ones Bruce won’t help in the way he should. Jason became Red Hood, knowing this life only leads to pain and death, to do what Bruce is too cowardly to do. He became Red Hood to be the voice for all the victims like him. That could have been saved if the hard choices were just made but weren’t. He is their voice and their protector. So, he’s been doing this for years. And the missions that go south, still never get any easier.
There’s a loud thud coming from your window, snapping you from your shallow sleep on the couch. You sit up quickly, your head slightly spinning with the sudden movement and you look over to your window, seeing the reflective red helmet shining back at you in the low light of the city and your apartment.
Jason takes the helmet, a mild quiver to his fingertips. “Sorry.” Jason mutters. “Did I wake you?”
You shake your head, moving to your knees so you can get a better look at him. “No, I was just lying down.” You lie, knowing he hates waking you up and you hadn’t been asleep more than twenty minutes anyway.
“That’s good.” Jason clears his throat but he hasn’t made any attempt to get up off the floor or make direct eye contact with you.
It’s all feeling heavy. His head, his eyes, his limps. Everything around him feels like it’s starting to close in. The adrenaline is crashing and everything feels like it’s about to suck the last breath from his lungs. It all hurts and aches and he usually handles it well, the injuries just come with the territory. He’s used to the pain but then nights like tonight happen and everything hurts. Every passed injury is echoing in pain, coming back for vengeance. The autopsy scars burn even though they shouldn’t, his face feels numb even though those injuries have been long healed from the pit. Every haunted injury comes back with a shattering echo.
“Jay?” You ask softly, trying to get him to look at you.
Usually, when Jason comes back from patrol, he's injured in some capacity. But, most of the time, he has this grin anyway that could light up Gotham's darkest alleyways. It's always a little cheeky and always a little arrogant. And charming. Because he went out and he did something good, for people who can't help themselves. His eyes are usually bright, blue and bold with enough energy to power your apartment. Those are the times he usually comes to you but then sometimes, like tonight, it's like every ghost comes back and takes over. The light is gone from his eyes and it's as if he's physically incapable of managing even a fake reassuring smile. It's these nights that are always the most worrisome because you know Jason has a habit of beating himself up relentlessly when something bad happens.
For a second, he’s not sure why he showed up here. You always clean him up and stitch him up. You’ve been doing it since he was Robin. A routine because you always understood when he needed to talk or sit in silence. But tonight, he’s not even feeling like he’s worthy of the kindness that radiates from your unbroken bones. He doesn’t think he deserves the help you always offer and the understanding because he failed tonight. And it was his fault. It was so bad that his jaw clenches as his heart starts to thunder.
"Are you okay?" You keep your voice soft, just above a whisper as if speaking too loudly will shatter him entirely.
His breath hitches in his throat with the question. He nearly shatters into a billion pieces right into your carpet. Jason Todd, on a good day, is rarely ever really okay but tonight it’s so much worse. He’s trapped in a harsh reality of what he does every night and he’s trapped in his own head, haunted by every passed mistake he’s ever made. Is he doing the right thing? Is this the only way? Is Bruce right? Maybe he is fucked up and maybe he never should have been brought back. Maybe those people would be alive right now if it weren’t for him.
Jason swallows his own heartbeat, a task that feels more like swallowing river rocks. "Yeah, I'm fine." His words are short and brittle while a redness starts to wash over his eyes.
You nod slowly before you get up from your spot on the couch. Jason watches you carefully and he knows you’re about to offer him the care he swears up and down he does not deserve. You crouch in front of him, resting your hands on his knees. Jason nearly pulls away but he knows it would hurt you if he did and he doesn’t want to cause anyone else any more pain. Not tonight.
“You don’t look fine.” You say softly as you tilt your head to the right. “Are you hurt anywhere?”
“Uh, yeah.” Jason nods as his mouth runs dry. “A few places.”
“Okay so I’ll get the kit and you can move the couch.”
“You don’t have to fucking help, alright? I don’t know why I came here.” Jason huffs but it's weak and ragged, forced as if speaking is too much of a task.
“You always come to me for help, Jay.” Your voice is kind and gentle as your thumbs lightly run over his knees.
“I know but I’ve already stained your carpet and couch. It’s late and you have work. I’ll just go home. It’s fine.” Jason shakes his head, his eyes plastered where your hands meet his knees.
“I don’t mind.” You shrug as if it’s the easiest thing in the world. “Taking care of you, I mean. It doesn’t bother me.” You offer him a soft smile once he glances up to you. “And Alfred told me how to get the stains out so…you really wanna use that as an excuse or you gonna let him help you?”
Jason lets out a sigh. “I don’t know.” There's a quiver in his voice.
You tap his head lightly with your finger, Jason's eyes finally locking on yours. "What's going on up there?"
You were on the streets together before he got lucky, well, depending how you want to look at it. You've known him for years and Jason has always been the one who wants better for people, Robin and Red Hood just gave him the opportunity to actually help those people. But, with that, he's also been the person who doesn't really know his worth or believes he's enough. A lot of things have happened, a lot of people have come and gone to nail those thoughts into the deepest parts of his mind. Those are always the thoughts that tend to be the ones that stick, even if they aren't true and you know they aren't.
You know Jason has a heart of gold and always has, always will. He thinks dying charged a part of that because sometimes, it feels like he should still be dead. So, he beats his heart out of his chest until he shatters into pieces, the shards always ricocheting back at him. He breaks his own heart because he thinks he deserves it, scattering the pieces in hopes the pain will always be true to what he deserves. But, you come around and pick up the pieces anyway because you always knew he was enough and worthy and important. You always knew that Jason would do what was best, for him and for other people who needed help.
"I got a damn cipher wrong and I was too late." Jason's voice finally cracks, his words harsh and aimed at himself.
His eyes always turn to almost a navy blue whenever he starts crying. It doesn't happen often, at least not around you, but you notice it. It's as if the emotional turmoil takes over every part of him stripping him of the liviness he usually has and that includes the brightness of his eyes. And it breaks your heart every time.
Jason has always had a thing about not being enough. He wasn't enough for either of his parents to stop using or enough for his dad to stick around, get a legal job. He wasn't enough for Bruce. A lot of people have tried over the years for him and tried with good intentions to just genuinely help because he deserved to be happy and healthy and safe but for some reason, it was never enough. Something else would happen and it'd mess it all up and the only one who ever got hurt in the mess was Jason. He's mentioned, a handful of times, maybe it was just him. Destined to like this forever. But you never saw it that way.
"I'm sorry, Jay." You brush the white streak of hair out of his eyes. "Do you wanna talk about it?" You ask, your brows pulled together.
You never saw him as not enough or damaged. He's an asshole, sure, but he's also kind and forgiving. He just wants to help people. Even when you were kids, questioning where your next meal was coming from, he'd try to help other kids if he could. It's what he did. It's what he does. You found out he was Robin and all you could do was laugh because the whole vigilante thing really fit him. Maybe not the way Bruce wanted things done, but helping people who the GCPD can't or won't help. But, even beyond being a vigilante, he's your favorite person. And you wouldn't trade him for the entire world. You desperately wish he could see himself through your eyes. Maybe it would help on nights like tonight.
"No." Jason scoffs, shaking his head. "No, I don't wanna talk or think about it anymore."
"Okay." You shrug casually, knowing he'll talk in bits and pieces later. "So, why don't we get you cleaned up and stitched up then we lay down. We can watch something or I can read to you until you fall asleep. Your choice." You offer him a gentle and kind smile.
"I don't wanna keep you up later. You'll be late for work again." Jason huffs, guilty pulling at the pit of his stomach.
You shrug, giving him a cheeky grin. "Eh, yeah, I can take some PTO." Your face suddenly lights up. "What if I take PTO and we go to Petsmart tomorrow, pick up some food and we go see the kittens at the shelter? If we bring in food, we can hang out with them for a little while."
The excitement in your voice gets Jason to crack a small and fragile smile. You know how much he likes cats. It's a silly offer, maybe, but it is nice and Jason will never understand why you try to hard to make him feel better, even when he thinks he doesn't deserve it. But, he does know, he is thankful for you anyway,
"That's how you wanna spend your precious time off?" Jason's voice is rough this time but it doesn't crack.
"With you and like twenty kittens? Yes." You nod quickly. "And I think you need it, anyway." Your smile falls into something comforting and honest. It feels like home. "Hanging out with animals is good for your mental health."
"Really?" Jason raises a brow at you.
"Oh, are you gonna tell me you're not beating yourself up and thinking you're the worst? You're not. I think you're the best but I know you well enough to know you don't think so when something happens." You suck in a breath, your hands sliding over his knees a few times. "So, we go hang out with some kittens and you'll feel a little better to tell me what happened and then I'll tell you that you still did your best."
"How do you even know that?" Jason scoffs, dodging your eyes again as the guilt starts pulling on his vocal cords.
"Because you always try your best." You answer simply. "It's not always easy, Jay and it's not always gonna work out. But, you always try and that's enough." You place your hand on his cheek, getting him to look at you. "So, what'd ya say?" The corner of your mouth perks up into a gentle and hopeful smile.
The last thing he wants to do is disappoint you, let someone else down. But, he also knows, deep down, that you do it because you care and you really believe everything you tell him. All you want to do is be there for him and maybe it does take some of the weight off of his shoulders. When he's carrying the world, you stand under it with him. And when he's taking a hammer to his own heart, you yank the hammer away and swap it out with glue, helping him put it back together. And on nights like tonight, he's not sure where he'd up if it weren't for you.
Jason nods softly, taking your hand in his. "Yeah, alright, thanks." Jason leans closer, resting his forehead against yours.
"Of course, Jay." You press a quick kiss to his nose. "Now, come on, lemme help you." You get to your feet and offer your hands to help Jason up.
He shakes his head, his chest still feeling heavy but knowing you'll always be here makes things easier. So, he sticks out of his own hands and encompasses yours in his before he stands up.
Tumblr media
Tag list: @jasontoddsmentaldisorders // @purplerose291 // @lovelessamai  // @makaelaseresin // @lenidaslenchen // @mayfieldss // @ghostkingblake // @dgraysonsss // @im-done-with-this-im-out // @velvetskies // @vivian-555 // @kebonita // @deyja-the-duckk// @jasontoddslover // @captainmarvels-blog // @totallynotkaibiased // @scarlovesyou // @whydoyoucare866 // @littlemeowmeow1000 // @septixtrash // @kplatzman // @killxz
273 notes · View notes