#I want something else out of my life

[fifthnailinstevesbat]

steve “cant get out of bed till middle of the day, barely leaves his house or is never home, isolating himself from everyone, never takes time for himself anymore, depressed and is slowly losing more and more of himself every single day” harrington post 1986’

robin “i know you loved her, and it must’ve killed that she wouldn’t take you back, but nancy is happy steve and she still loves you. she’s not the only one out there for you, and you’ve gotta get over it. we miss you” buckley post 1986’, trying to help her best friend

steve “…this isn’t about nancy” harrington.

robin “wha-?… oh. oh steve.” buckley.

he still wears the vest.

#stranger things #eddie munson #steddie #steve harrington #nancy wheeler #stranger things 4 #robin buckley #yeah idk #i just thoight abt this #bc i miss my pooks #steve being so distraught after the events of s4 #and it’s understandable and everyone else is kinda the same level of shook up for a while #but for steve it just… continues #and nobody really knows what’s going on #robin tries to get him out of his shell without prying for so long #but eventually she just straight up tells him how it is in an attempt to get him to TALK to her #SAY SOMETHING #bc she thinks it must be he is heartbroken abt nancy #she didn’t want him back #and that’s so rough but #robin wants him to know that she isn’t the only person in his life that loves him #even if it’s not in the way he is wanting #but steve just #he just says; this isn’t about nancy #and robin is confused #then she puts it all together #then she understands. #eddie.

[uncanny-tranny]

I think it would really benefit people to internalize that mental illnesses are often chronic and not acute. Some of us will never be able to jump the hurdle of managing illness, much less sustaining a sense of normalcy. Many of us will never "recover," will never manage symptoms, will never even come close to appearing normal - and this is for any condition, even the ones labeled as "simple" disorders or "easy-to-manage" disorders.

It isn't a failure if you cannot manage your symptoms. It isn't a moral failure, and you aren't an awful person. You are human. There's only so much you can do before recognizing that you cannot lift the world. Give yourself the space to be ill because, functionally, you are.

#mental health #mental health advocacy #like... anxiety and depression are often concieved of as simple and easy to manage... #...but that isn't the case for so many of us. anxiety and depression just have a lot more research invested into them... #...and while i wish this were the case for literally every other condition it does alter people's perception of you to some extent... #...so while this is NOT solely about anxiety or depression it includes us... #...my anxiety and depression and PTSD have *destroyed* my life. this is chronic and will probably be life-long... #...and that isn't my fault. i've done the fucking work but guess what? that doesn't account for the fact that I Am Just ILL #the least we can do for each other is to be compassionate #be compassionate to those who cannot heal. be compassionate to the people who can't manage their lives. this world is scary enough #recognize that management of symptoms is something not all of us can do - even IF their condition is labeled as 'easy to manage' #i allowed myself to feel angry that i can't heal 'normally' and that was unfair as fuck toward myself #and i NEED people to internalize this so that MAYBE this could help somebody else who is where i was #i NEED them to understand that it's okay that they are where they are - sometimes shit just doesn't turn out how you expect or want #don't beat yourself over you being a person. you are struggling enough. you deserve to rest. just rest please #and just... give yourself space

[lunarharp]

more phoenix wright situations

#ace attorney tag #maybe i should tag this narumitsu or something. but i dont really care. #gearing up to rereading/illustrating bits of my fic i suppose...i think nick really is too dense to realise he's in love with edgeworth #without some scheming fop trying to intrude. i love villains like kristoph..villains can be fun..witnessing their pathetic folly.. #or more like edgeworth would never have mentioned his feelings ever in his life if he wasn't sure phoenix reciprocates. #i want to see it this way because Falling in love during childhood with the person you're going to end up with. is not relatable #there have to be Situations that make you Realise. #as with orufrey i adore the idea of people not working out their romance with that person until their 30s+ #but... i mean. even with orufrey i often think how alaira could be qifrey's ex. and oru having been pursued by noble fops through his work #there is that delicate sliver of time before orufrey start living together that such believable situations could have happened. #Then the relief of politely and amicably extricating themselves from those untenable situations #the idea of falling in love age 7 and saving your first kiss for age 35 or something is all very well but more relatable is #people realising how they really feel whilst trying something that ends up feeling wrong. #The comfort and joy of living with your dearest one as if it's platonic - much preferable to trying anything more with anyone else. #But i doubt i will ever portray that or mention it further. it is indeed very delicate to me. #and i really am an OTP FOR LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! kind of person who can barely bear to consider this anyway...NOT a polyshipper i'm afraid ! #so i wouldn't mind either if they do have their first kiss in their lives age 35 with each other either. I would not mind that at all. #i love bi/gay couples apparently... bi father figures & their grumpy gay men waiting for them to work it all out... #not used to using colour in comic-style drawings..or at all..so this is messy and awkward looking..but colour is refreshing #i imagine i will go back to witch hat art soon btw. my destiny in life. #i still remember writing my nrmt fic expecting to write their first kiss & then partway through twas like Umm No. They have kissed prior. #does that really line up with this comic though... i think i had their early dinner dates/first kiss BEFORE disbarment. #so i guess this comic doesn't line up with my ficverse.... No..... U___U Oh well. sorry kris! <3

[kizunagatari]

Yugi Muto ← → Pharaoh Atem Two strangers, unbeknownst to one another, were mercilessly bonded by the hands of Destiny…

In this Tiny Birdcage - Sound Horizon, ENG cover by Enn Sings

#kiz draws #yugioh #yugioh dm #puzzleshipping #if you have 5 mins to spare pls check out the full song!!! Enn did a heartbreakingly wonderful job on it #like I had something else I wanted to draw but I literally lost my mind when I revisited this cover so here this is #if you wanna know more about the song's story pls feel free to message I promise I won't bite #this is also frantically put together because I needed to eject these thoughts from my head so I can actually focus on stuff this week #my life is in shambles and I will not survive the next 2 weeks

[13eyond13]

love it when a character that's hard to read intuitively for you has like a dedicated fandom interpreter who can just glance at their blank face in a panel and then give you a 3k word essay on their innermost thoughts & desires & fears and neatly tie it back into the themes & whatnot as if it's the most obvious thing in the world

#im talking about griffith btw #guts i feel i get intuitively - maybe because i have some personality traits in common with him #and we get more about his life concretely told to us in canon. so he is a bit easier to pin down as a character and feel attached to for me #but whenever i was reading the manga i just kept wanting more insight about griffith's actions and feelings #like ok yeah its fun to have mysterious antagonists and suspense /tension etc but its also fun to feel like you deeply understand them too #and i felt like that was a bit missing from him for me in canon #so reading about him in analysis and fics is the most fun for me rn #he always felt kinda half unreal to me- which maybe was the point of him - but i wanted a bit more about his childhood or something? #and wished we had more stuff explicitly from his pov in the story to read or explanation about his transformation or wtv #and now he's so much more closed off to me even than he was in the golden age. i keep waiting for him to explain stuff and he does not #ANYWAYS all this rambling to say some people out there are very good at interpreting him and making his like. insecurities #more obvious to me bc i didnt really get that side of him from canon intuitively well #also im really enjoying reading the first few berserk fics ive read #there may not be a ton of them out there but there is def writing talent in the fandom #i'll share some recs once i'm done sifting through most of what's out there to read #also (not to tie everything back to death note but it IS my home fandom after all) #i feel griffith is obvs the more light-like character here and L maybe a bit guts-like? but unlike berserk in death note #light is the one you get to know best and L is the mysterious / unreal one you don't get a lot of concrete insight into #and in the DN fandom I can read the more mysterious character intuitively but had to warm up to the less mysterious one instead #and the mystery of L makes sense to me and doesnt bug me as much due to like - he HAS to hide a lot about himself or else he will die lol #so some similarities there but also some opposite feels as well #berserk spoilers #p

[icewindandboringhorror]

Just curious what the average level of personal investment in these sorts of things is. Like, how much do people usually get into silly stuff like this their friends ask of them? etc. etc. Which I know, only surveying a small sample on a very specific website means I'm not getting an exact average idea lol, but.. curious nonetheless .. Maybe reblog for bigger sample size but also this is not very serious at all/not worth a call to action gbhjbhjb

#which I know this could be context dependent like.. maybe you'd normally dress up but on a week that #you feel sick you wouldn't or etc. etc. - but I mean.. GENERALLY. in the most general average scenario #where you have the average amount of health and free time that you always do. etc. just based on your personality #and level of investment in these things - what on AVERAGE are you most inclined to do #also of course assume they communicate with you ahead of time and are not like planning a part last minute #like 'throw together costume in 5 hours and show up tonight randomly' or etc. I would hope that if we're going with the #AVERAGE of things - most people's friends have better communication skills than springing entire parties #on people last minute lol #assume you have like.. a few days-a week or so to prepare. however ealrly people usually start talking about #birthdays. In my experience it's usually one or two weeks ahead of time. Like 'oh next weekend' or 'oh two weeks from now' etc. #ANYWAY.. feeling a little Sick again of course but still trying to get some photos or something posted #AGAIN i promise I am not going to exlcusively post polls and ntohing else forever hgkjgnekj #I just really really love the ability to post polls and have always my whole life been obsessed with surveying people #I used to think I wanted to do that as a career somehow like.. be one of the people that does psychological interviews #or produce interview asessments for a company or etc. etc. I am always the one friend in the group thats giving out custom made #surveys or asking for other simialr stuff (did you ever take an mbti quiz? how about enneagra #m?? oh yeah I know they're not really scientifically valid or antyhing but like... DID you take them?? huh?? did you??please?? ghjj) #I simply cannot resist.. posting a little poll every once in a while.. as a treat #whilst I still fall behind on like actual content and costumes and stuff gbjhbjh #New poll adventure should be not as much of a wait as the last one was though since I already have the writing #for it really. I just have to do the ms paint sketch. hopefully no unexpected other health issues will get in the way #*** *** *** #< (anytime I do these three star patterns it is an ocd compulsion not me bleeping out words or something just ignore it lol) #(it means something secret in my evil brain just pretend you do not see it. significant only to me) #BUT YEAH.. ... poll... what type of costume party atendee are you? #:0c

[wigglebox]

Summer sunsets 🌅

#spnfanart #destiel #destiel fanart #dean winchester #castiel #wiggleart #pixel art #I saw a pixel art with a moon with a moon beam going through the cloud and really wanted to try #it with a sunset #and yes this is their lil farm house #I have their whole property mapped out okay like it’s really something else #it’s an hgtv show in my head when it comes to their post show life #where they are alive and happy and have a little farm house and a big red barn they fix up together #it’s a thing

[puppyeared]

fuck it. plaguesona

#i thought of this a couple weeks ago on the bus a couple seats away from someone loudly coughing into the open air #i think something snapped and i decided to make a fuckin. medieval ass plague sona. horseman of pestilence fursona #this is also why i was asking abt animals with medical symbolism.. originally i wanted a two headed snake like the staff of caduceus #but it turns out thats actually hermes symbol. the real symbol for medicine is the rod of asclepius which looks pretty similar #the difference is that theres only one snake and its twined around a stick. ironically mercy from overwatch's weapons are named after #the caduceus despite the misconception LMAOOO #snakes were the most consistent medicine related animal i could find even across multiple cultures so it couldve really worked #if i could actually draw scalies.. one of my earliest sketches had a cobra with a syringe at the end of its tail like a rattlesnake #and it had markings similar to the syringe tube but i didnt have much else going on so i scrapped it #i was also recommended animals with less obvious ties to medicine like jellyfish and horseshoe crabs and learned something new ^_^ #im not confident i could pull off a non-mammal furry but they were really good ideas i might put into smth else.. i also thought of #axolotls bc of their regenerative thing and growing back limbs but i think that would suit smth like a surgeon or amputation... #possums and bats were also an option bc theyre actually really resistant to most diseases like rabies but i feel like ppl wouldnt know that #if they saw it so it looks a little ironic at a glance. rabbits rats and mice were my second option bc of animal testing and lab rats #less obvious reference but the moon rabbit in chinese mythology is loosely connected to medicine bc it makes the elixir of life #otherwise lab mice in a pharmacy / modern medicine setting seemed fitting and jerboa tails remind me of cotton buds #and. ironically. jerboas are more closely related to elephants than rats and mice. can you believe it #my art #myart #my oc #sona #plaguesona #cottonbud #fur #furry art #character design #ref sheet #oc ref sheet

[princeandreis]

since we’ve heard they’re in talks for the 5th life smp season i’ve seen people saying zedaph should be added and at first i was like “hmm… i don’t know if that would go well.” and i say that as an enormous zedaph enjoyer. he’s extremely talented and funny and he gets along great with everyone, but he also spends all his time in a hole doing redstone crafts by himself and he’s kind of allergic to lore. typical hermit behavior doesn’t mesh well with the constraints of the series, so i thought, “if zedaph can’t do his normal mad scientist thing, what can he do?”

but then i realized. the series is so short-lived that people don’t spend time doing redstone or constructing elaborate builds. resources are extremely limited and players have to interact with each other. the life series forces everyone out of their comfort zone in one way or another.

we know that more typically solitary players have done well, and i know zedaph would rise to the challenge. he’s also an absolute wildcard. he has to put his energy somewhere. so now the question is, if zedaph can’t do redstone, what will he do instead?

#personally can’t wait to find out #this is my bid for zedaph in the life smp s5 pspspspspspsps grian you know you want to #this may seem like a stupid take bc. obviously the server has other weird redstoners. but none so weird as zedaph i think #like can anyone hear me he won’t have any of his toys to play with so he’ll have to do something else #zedaph #life series #life smp

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

I'm surprised you haven't posted any Welcome home stuff recently! Honestly kinda makes me sad since I love your WH art and stuff

yea y'all are gonna have to be Patient w/ me bc

a) i have like. a week left to pack all of my stuff before i need to shove everything into a uhaul and leave, so its crunch time! leaving little to no energy/interest in anything else

b) to be honest my mental health is the worst its been in years - which is fine, its whatever, i can deal. it's not as bad as it could be and im handling it! like a champ, even! but also its leaving little to no energy/interest in anything else

c) had a minor crisis over my art and how i interact w/ WH, and i realized im not scribbling enough of what I want. ive mostly been trying to please people and do as asked and thats! not good! so i want to temper expectation & reassert that im Not a WH art blog - its just a hyperfixation / something i love rn. i draw what i enjoy & what i want in the moment.

#i picked up my tablet last night and all of my motivation died on the spot #so im just. eh whatever ill get back into the swing of things eventually #but yeah im spending my time packing & keeping myself afloat! not much room for other things at present! #rambles from the bog #but yeah i was starting to feel like a commodity of sorts? #like the majority of asks are just some form of 'can you draw this' 'draw this' 'id love it if youd draw this' #which is. fine. im an art blog! thats what i do! #but its also like hey. im just some guy doodling what they enjoy. im not a machine churning out content for consumption #& it gets to the point where there's so much expectation and obligation and 'demand'- #when do i ever sit down and truly indulge in what i want? #like the monster scribble i posted the other day! it made me so happy! i love monsters and Beasts! #when do i ever allow myself to draw them? #rarely bc i feel like people Expect puppets from me. and thats not a great feeling! #i love puppets i love wh and everything but i would like to enjoy it w/o pressure yk yk.... #& for a second there i Was feeling the pressure and scribbling puppets was starting to feel like a chore #something i Needed to do to please people #so! im focusing on real life & taking a break from creation & keeping my mindset away from 'jump into traffic' thankyew <3 #theres just too much going on right now #in my head And outside of it. #so ill stick to packing & binging psych & i'll lovingly place everything else on the backburner

[megamindsecretlair]

This is your daily reminder to say "Fuck that job"! I have NEVER had issues leaving a job until this one. The amount of gaslighting is unmatched. The amount of sweating over tiny details is unheard of. The amount of stress they're putting me under should be studied, honestly.

The way I want to say, "Fuck you", every time a random person I have NEVER talked to tells me congrats and good luck and we're gonna miss you. No tf you arent. You fuckers made my life hell for 2 years.

Your job dont care about you 👏🏽 so dont care about it 👏🏽 you are there to collect a check and fuckin dip 👏🏽

#megaminds musings #the amount of times ive wanted to tear my hair out these past two weeks #ive never been so stressed in my life #todays my last day and they really getting on my nerves #i want to go home #i want to pet my puppies #i want to exist without the expectation to do something for someone else #where are the introvert jobs at #tired of being harassed because of how quiet i am #play ya mammy #not me #im quiet #not a pushover

[bumblingbabooshka]

Voyager plotline in which The Doctor, Seven, Tuvok, and Neelix have to become a barbershop quartet in order to save the crew. With the little outfits and everything. (Harry's providing the music)

#It's life or death bc neither Seven nor Tuvok would want to do it otherwise #Look at the EMH and tell me he wouldn't love to twirl a little cane around and sing a jaunty little tune #I chose Neelix as the fourth bc I remember Seven was trying to teach him how to sing? #and I like a whole 'we'll NEVER get to nationals like THIS!' moment bc he's got enthusiasm but is horribly off key #I think the resolution is that they try to just have Neelix lip sync but something goes wrong and one by one the other members #fall in the middle of the performance for a variety of reasons and then it's only Neelix and whoever was providing his voice falters #and so Neelix just has to sing himself and it turns out the aliens fucking LOOVE his terrible off key vocals #everyone else is groaning (from the variety of ailments and injuries that hit them) and Neelix is grinning with a trophy the aliens gave th #(they also gave their crew back) #fake star trek voyager episodes my beloved #st voyager

[skunkes]

the way I've been raised has shown itself in a recent awful experience I had and the realization won't leave me because I'm not sure what to do about it.

I don't like feeling anger/upset and it's rare for me to feel it anyway but it's led to me being unable to tell what's worth getting upset over anymore. If my wants upset somebody, then, well, maybe I shouldn't have them? What is so serious that I need it to go completely my way...? What desires am I allowed to have. It's not that serious, it's okay if not, you can't always get what you want....

every time I feel Upset I am later wracked with guilt because it wasn't a big deal and I was just being selfish... What IS a big deal then? How can I tell? Its admittedly never a big deal... But I keep being upset. And stepped on....

#talkys #this is what led to me Staying for as long as i did #there would be issues but if I brought them up i wld then be made to feel guilty for feeling that way #but i cant reverse that bc well!! its true like is it really a big deal? life isnt that serious I dont need to get upset... #i get upset at something my parents do and in the end i feel ungrateful and selfish #i really cant tell anymore which is why i Stayed as mentioned above #in the sense of well yeah the way im being treated doesnt make me feel good but why do i need to feel good? #isnt that selfish...isnt that asking too much...isnt that making yourself out to be Better Than... #i really dont know. i get so ready to give up my position on anything because I dont want to be selfish #and because im no better than anyone else #my mom caused some drama on my birthday wrt my sister's family and it led to me not being able to go to the duck #pond on my birthday... which is the only thing i really wanted to do on an otherwise uneventful day #i was meant to feel shame abt it because well we can always go any other day!!! relax!!! #and it is true....! #we can go any other day why did i get upset? its not that serious...nothing is that serious...i feel so guilty + spoiled + selfish #i just felt humiliated for wanting to go in the first place. and for getting upset that we couldnt go. like a toddler. #*not that i actually get Toddler Level upset...but it always Feels like i did...ykwim #i just dont understand......idk if i can Repair this....

[pawzofchaos]

new topher design kinda?? changed my way of drawing him at least

I know I’m like only drawing topher and abe please stick with me here

I swear I’ll draw more of the other characters eventually

#he kinda looks diseased #god it’s storming like hell out here rn #I need more fluffy tophabe in my life but I also want more delusional topher #fuck I was gonna say something else but I already forgot #oh well #paws draws #art #my art #fanart #ch #clone high #clone high reboot #topher bus #clone high topher #tophabe #clone high abe #lucy fur #hashtag silly !!

[sugarcoatednightshade]

Tired of seeing fic on ao3 claiming to be based off dune the book series when it’s very obvious that the writer has only seen dune the movie(s).

Yes, it matters. Yes, these are very different works. You’re probably doing this for visibility; I don’t care. Archive Of Our Own is a fucking archive, stop labeling your works with a tag you know is factually incorrect. It makes it impossible for me to filter for fics I want to read.

#ao3 #dune #dune books #dune messiah #written because I’ve seen so many fics claiming to be based off the book who have no idea who Alia is #like girl! that’s my girl!!! #if your fic doesn’t contain Alia The Murderous Toddler then I don’t want it in my house in my home in my life #also the fight between feyd and paul went so differently in the books vs the movie. like it’s barely even an obstacle for Paul in the books #the differences are subtle in fic but really obvious if you’re expecting to see one thing and then all of a sudden it’s something else #(did I just describe all of fic? yes. but I hope y’all know what I mean. we are working off of different canon baselines) #seriously Alia is 15 pounds soaking wet three year old child. and she kills the baron . for fun… #also the fremen are not prudes. most people get this. but really neither is the rest of the empire??? I mean the harkonens obviously were. #.like that.. but also I get the feeling that no one else really cared #I’m only on the second book so I could be wrong. but from here it seems like the dune universe has a very fluid understanding of gender and #and sexuality. and polyamory. and drug use. #shout out to face changers gotta be one of my favorite genders btw #anyway. ugh. #long rant is long

[lostlegendaerie]

As I keep working on my novel and wanna start divorcing my real face/name from my author persona... I'm gonna have to slap SOMETHING on those books, so I'm looking for suggestions!!!

#saro's writing #saro's art #gotta keep telling myself I can do it. manifesting #every day of my life it just. burns a hole in my chest #I want to create. I want to share. I want to put something out into the world that isn't based on someone else's work #I want to uplift and inspire and give everyone so goddamn sick of forgiveness some goddamn catharsis #no more swallowing teeth. for ONCE we get to spit them in our abusers face