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#I swear to god I have rejected her marriage proposals about five times now
glowingsand · 3 years
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Petition to turn my friends texts into Sam and Bucky themed comics please these are too chaotic to be kept hidden from the world
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astaroth1357 · 3 years
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Demigod MC Series: Hestia
This is another eternally virgin goddess, so we're doing another pseudo-demigod by adoption (like we did with Athena).
Demigod MC: Intro, Aphrodite, Hermes, Hades, Dionysus, Demeter, Athena, Hades Pt. 2, Poseidon, Ares, Hestia
Hestia is the goddess of the Hearth, Home, Architecture, Domesticity, Family, and the State. She's high up there (firstborn of Rhea and Cronus), but several factors have led to her falling into the background when compared to the other (flashier) Olympians. She swore to never marry, rejecting proposals from both Poseidon and Apollo, and is something of an antithesis to Aphrodite.
Lucifer
Honestly? He thought they were exactly what they were after. A weak human with no experience in the magical world what-so-ever.
Well… He was half-right.
On the surface, this is a pretty weak human. They don't have super flashy powers or a divine birth from the gods… but they do have a very protective adoptive mother.
The brothers had just settled in for their first dinner with the new human when the goddess herself strolled into their dining room, asked who was in charge, then dragged Lucifer away by the ear!
She's not even his mother, yet he felt the intense urge to apologize and put himself in his own room… Oh, the humiliation… at least she did the same to Diavolo…
The Prince was only able to calm her down by promising absolutely NO harm would come to her child… on their heads...
By the time the goddess finally let him go, Lucifer was about ready to shackle the MC to his wrist so nothing could touch them but he settled on keeping them with him like an assistant of sorts. They were in charge of helping him with the paperwork so he could keep an eye on them. 
What he didn’t expect was for them to be so… good at it? They could keep his offices clean, they managed his daily schedule, fixed up the House, and still have time to bring him tea and sweets every night!
They could even reign in his brothers somehow… They weren't strong or intimidating, but one or two mildly unhappy words out of them and everybody would be on their best behavior.
Was everyone positive they're only human...?
As much as he hated to admit, he may have a slight deep case of falling for the housekeeper… He would make a move, but well…
He has Beel to contend with first.
Mammon
Okay so, watching Lucifer get dragged out by the ear just like Raphael used to do to him was hilarious!!! The whole room got a good laugh! 🤣
Until Hestia glared at them and suddenly they all felt like they'd disappointed someone important….
And all that fuss over some dumb human??
So what if they made amazing food?
So what if they could clean the entire mansion in a day?
So what if they were the walking equivalent to a warm cup of cocoa on a winter's day??
So what if they were just the kindest, sweetest thing in this godforsaken hellscape and he would throw himself in front of a bus to keep them safe-
-Wait, when did that happen?!?
Seriously, Mammon's attachment to the MC came out of NOWHERE to him. One day, he was threatening to eat their soul and the next he's freaking out when they stub their toe!
He swears they have to have some kind of magic about them! A charm, or a spell, or… their lovable smile and warm, loving hugs...! 😊
Damnit!! They're too cute!! He needs them to go away but also never leave, thanks. 😒
In all seriousness, though their kind nature puts Mammon's tsundere self at a bit of a disadvantage, his protective instincts shoot through the roof whenever they're involved.
Naturally, that means his day is spent running them away from hungry lesser demons or shielding them from Beel and Lucifer's tug-of-war matches… He's a busy guy these days. 😖
Leviathan 
They're so… so… MOE!!!
That was his immediate thought when Mammon brought them home. He was expecting a defenseless human, but not one that could have stepped out of one of his slice-of-life manga!
To be honest, his instant thought was try and find a place to sit them on his shelves with the rest of the adorable characters he loves… 😅
And that was before they even opened their mouth! Five words into their introduction and he was ready to get their face on a t-shirt!!
Honestly, combine their natural cuteness with their household skills and they made for perfect waifu/husbando material… 
Not helped by the fact they found one of his maid/butler outfits while doing the laundry one day. Not only did they ask if they could wear it, they actually non-ironically liked it and started wearing it around the House!!
Oh he got cornered by Beel, Lucifer, and Mammon separately that day because they thought he was using them for fetish fuel… But it was their idea, he swears!!
I mean… He didn't discourage them or anything either but still…
If Beel hadn't claimed them on Day One, Levi might have eventually thrown his hat in the ring too... Oh well… he can pine from a distance… What else is new? 😔
Satan
He has a video of Hestia dragging Lucifer out of the dining room on his phone and it's one of his most treasured possessions now. 😌
He is perhaps the only person in the House who was not at all impressed with their little human.
So they could cook? So could he. So they can clean? That's not impressive. They could manage a household? Big deal, he's more or less been in charge of the same thing for centuries!
As far as he saw it, there was nothing the MC could do that he couldn't do as proficiently or even better. There was nothing remarkable about this human at all!
… except for one thing.
That maid/butler outfit of Levi's? The one they like to wear around?
It has cat accessories…
Either they don't notice or they don't mind it but they essentially walk around the House cleaning things with little kitty ears attached to their head and a bell on their collar…
Dammit… Why did Levi even buy that?!?
Satan ended up getting in trouble for enchanting their outfit to give them REAL ears and a tail "accidentally..." Lucifer strung him up by his toes, Beel gave him a black-eye, and Mammon still calls him a "perverted cat freak" but it was worth it, he says, worth it!!
Asmodeus 
Oh Beel…
Asmo saw Beel's feelings for the MC coming from a mile away. He didn't even need to confirm it with a sniff check, he had them scented by the end of their first night!
Lucifer, on the other hand, now that was a surprise... 😏
Ask him a century ago if Lucifer would ever consider a human lover, godly mother or no, and he'd have laughed! Yet here he is, giving gifts and sneaking whiffs of their adorable new housemate!
Of course, that's causing some commotion because they're pitted against each other, but Asmo finds it kind of cute honestly. 
Beel and Lucifer aren't fighting, not for real. The whole house knows Lucifer would win in a real brawl, but neither of them actually want to hurt the other… They're far too close for that.
So Beel tosses Lucifer around with kid gloves and Lucifer holds back considerably against Beel. It's pretty much just two brothers who love each other squabbling over the same toy… 🤭
Honestly, Lucifer might have bowed out by now and just let Beel have them but now his pride's on the line… thus an endless tussle between family and the sweet MC is in the middle, clueless to it all!
Tragic, is it not? But it certainly makes things more entertaining around here! (Good thing too since Beel beat him to the punch… If it's a fight against those two, he'll have to keep any of his own affairs with the MC under the radar... 😏)
Beelzebub 
He has claimed this one. Full stop.
For a bit of perspective: when Barbatos needs cooking tips, he calls Hestia. Hestia, the Divine Master of All Things Cooking. Hestia, the goddess who raised this MC… 
Needless to say if they have any magic at all, it's in the kitchen.
If food is the way to Beel's heart, this MC has claimed his heart, soul, and probably all of his vital organs. Their food is astounding!! Always perfect every time and so good it brings him to tears!
It started the night of that first dinner, prepared by MC. He was too busy scarfing down the table to even notice a goddess showed up and then he proposed to the MC with their own pig roast by meal's end!
They said no to marriage, but an instant pact agreement suited him just fine.
Beel didn't waste a single moment before he started treating them like a potential mate, territorial aggression and all, but there was a bit of a catch… He kept the MC totally oblivious to it.
Surprisingly, Beel's can turn the "They're MINE" part of his brain on and off pretty well. He's nothing but sweet and cuddly to the MC when they're around and even with his brothers!... as long as they don't try anything.
The moment he caught whiff that Lucifer might be pursuing them too, it was on. Suddenly the two brothers who almost never fight were in competition against each other! But of course, both have an unspoken rule to never do so in front of MC.
And now poor MC believes it's common for demons to "play wrestle" like puppies and hugs are traditionally supposed to be so hard they could snap spines… 
And it doesn’t look like they'll be backing down any time soon… Oh dear...
Belphegor 
You know what? For once, everything goes exactly to plan for Belphie!
No really, this MC has no hidden powers, no magic horses, not even Demon Nip. They are a helpless, trusting little human who just wants to help their big teddy bear get his twin back!
So, you know how it goes. The charm, the lies, the treachery and all of that. He even gets to kill them!! Oh, happy days!! 😁
Come to think of it, they did smell an awful lot like Beel… But who cares, as long as Lucifer suffers right?? And this whole "living together in harmony" crap fails, right?!
Wrong. 
Beel went ballistic. Lucifer did too, but Beel was what really hurt…
Belphie can safely say that in all of his life, Beel has never physically attacked him. Not once, or at least, not with intent to kill… 
But when the sixthborn's fist went crashing through the wall right by his ear that day, he knew his brother's first instinct was to aim for his head… and his second was to miss, as he still loved him, but only by just a little.
What the hell did he just do??
Thank their father for Barbatos and all the funky time stuff he can do because bringing the MC "back" snapped his angry brothers right out of it. 
Things should have been smoothed over at that point but as everyone was finally settling down for tea, Hestia made another appearance in the House… this time carrying a butcher's knife!
Time fix or no, Diavolo had promised her no harm would come to MC and at least one continuity of them DIED… so punishment was now on Lucifer and the Demon Prince himself!
Belphie, in a rare case of guilt and an expression of brotherly love, offered to take their place since it WAS kind of all his fault. His gesture softened the Goddess of Family juuust enough to lighten his sentence from execution to hard labor.
And thus, the MC had their own housekeeping assistant for a whole year, complete with bitter reluctance and a matching maid outfit! Cat-theme and all!!
He's sending nightmares to anybody who laughs… guaranteed. 😒
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jinmindeulle · 4 years
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the art of love | cs
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pairing: choi san x reader ft. mentions of park seonghwa 
word count: 5.1k
genre: artist!reader, florist!san, exes to lovers au | angst, fluff
warnings: minor swearing
find ateez’s masterlist here!
enjoy ♥
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How many deep breaths did I have to take to put myself together every time I started driving back to my hometown?
I think I stopped counting five years ago. It didn’t matter how many times I had done that, it had always driven me crazy.
But this time, it was worse.
“Please, text me when you’re on your way. Let’s meet at Jjinsong’s Café before going home. Be safe, love you!”
Yet, I couldn’t be mad. I missed my family too much to be upset over that. It’s been seven years, y/n, get over it!
I replied to my sister with a short message full of heart emojis and I put my phone inside my pocket. I started the car and glanced at my (ex?) apartment floor. Hope to see you empty when I get back.
Last time I visited my family’s home in Namhae, it was all tears and sad eyes. Making my way back to Seoul was one of the hardest things for me. However, every time I went back to the capital city, the driver’s seat was always taken by the same man, who at least tried to make my trip bearable by holding one of my hands when he could. But that day, I was the one driving, all alone.
I couldn’t break the news to my mother over the phone. She had gotten attached to him over the years. But she didn’t knew the whole truth, and honestly, going back to Namhae was way cheaper than calling my mom to tell her that I had rejected my boyfriend’s marriage proposal without second thoughts, and that my life was just a mess in general.
And I also needed to see her, my dad, my sister and my nephews. They were going to help healing my open scars. At least try to.
I picked a random playlist and kept it on repeat the whole trip. Fortunately, being a Thursday, the traffic was not that bad, especially at such an early hour. I really didn’t want to stay under that roof any longer. I felt miserable there. Why did I have to put it off that much?
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“Why did you have to put it off that much?”
“I wonder exactly the same”
My sister looked at me with a raised eyebrow while she quietly sipped her coffee.
It had always amazed me how calm and collected Eunjung acted and reflected in situations like mine. She would never get upset unless it was the end of the world, and that hardly ever happened.
“I knew something was wrong since the last time you came home with him”
“But it was not that bad back then”
“You sure?”
“Well…”
He had been promoted a week before and his father had announced that he was soon going to retire, leaving him his position as CEO of one of the greatest companies in South Korea. It had easily gone to his head, and I wasn’t able to stand staying in the same room every time he brought that up.
“Maybe you’re right” I sighed, quietly stirring my own coffee. “I honestly don’t know, Jung. I didn’t like to think about it because it meant doing something about it. And I think I was way too comfortable living like that to try and change it.”
“And he made you do it”
“Pretty much, yes. I couldn’t get married to him. I don’t think I loved him enough to sacrifice what I wanted in life just for him”
“I’m glad you did that, y/n. It means you’re still chasing your dreams”
“I mean, yeah. I have always been. Not actively, but I kept dreaming about having my very own gallery, and everyone in Seoul wanting to have my art pieces on their living room’s walls.”
“Why not everyone in the country? Or in the world?”
“My dreams are more of the realistic type, Jung” I chuckled, munching my last chocolate cookie.
“How are you going to tell mom?”
“With your help?” I smiled innocently, trying to display the best puppy face I could master.
“And how do you want me to do that? ‘Hi mom, y/n here broke up with Seonghwa right after he proposed to her because it was not the life she wanted! Please don’t be that happy, it will break her poor heart!’”
“Eunjung! Please!” I begged “She won’t leave me alone and…”
“She will” my oldest and only sister interrupted me, smiling like the Cheshire Cat. “There’s been a rumour going around…”
“Wait, what’s going on?”
Eunjung sipped from her blue coffee mug and looked at me with the same innocent eyes I had displayed some seconds ago. Then, she quietly put the mug down and got closer to me over the wooden table, encouraging me to do the same. Once we were close enough to avoid being heard by the rest of the customers, she whispered in my ear.
“Rumour has it that Choi San is getting divorced”
I resoundingly sat back down, looking at my sister with a mix of weird emotions in my eyes. I hadn’t heard his name in ages. Not because I happened to not hear it, but just because I had deliberately asked my family not to bring his name up when I was around.
“Eunjung…”
“His wife cheated on him”
“Please, stop” I murmured, tightly closing my eyes, trying to get rid of the million memories that my brain decided to bring back after so many years of suppressing them. “You know how I feel about him”
“You’re telling me that after more than seven years you’re still upset about him and what you went through? You were like twenty years old, c’mon! You’re a woman now, y/n!”
“I was twenty two, and yes, I’m over it. But I don’t want to know, hear or talk about him. He’s dead to me. He’s been dead to me since the day I moved to Seoul, and will be until the end of my days”
“I didn’t know it was that deep”
“You were too busy taking care of your babies, Jung. And I’m not complaining here, I just know that you never got the full story, but it’s OK. It’s in the past now”
“You sure?”
“Stop making me question my life!” I cried, throwing a used paper napkin right at her face.
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“What do you want me to say?”
My mom had always been understanding. She would calmly nod and hug me, telling me that everything was going to be okay, and letting me soak her blouse with my teenage tears. However, there were situations in which you could never guess what her reaction would be. And that was one of those times.
“Honey, I think we all knew that you were going to end things with that guy” my dad intercepted “but we weren’t aware of the fact that it was that bad”
“In all honestly, I wasn’t either” I murmured “it was just my routine. I had been waking up next to him for nearly five years. I had a job that let me live comfortably and not worry about anything else than buying expensive clothes every now and then because I was supposed to be accompanying Seonghwa in every fucking company’s party” I allowed me to cry for the first time, letting the pain and desperation out “I was living like a damn princess. But I never wanted that. I had never wanted that!” I sobbed. A pair of gentle arms held me tight, and I instantly knew that it was my mom. I hugged her back, holding onto her like she was the only oxygen mask available in a crashing plane.
“I know dear, I know. And I’m proud of you. You did what you wanted to do, because you should always do that. And it’s OK. It will never be a bad thing to follow your heart, y/n”
I nodded, drying the flowing tears with the back of my sleeve. “Thank you mom, dad. I love you”
“We love you too, darling” my dad affectionately kissed my cheek, chuckling when I showed him a weak smile. “Why don’t you take a shower while I finish preparing lunch? I bet your nephews want to see you as much as you do”
“Yeah, will do” I nodded, grabbing my large pastel purple suitcase. “I need to recharge before seeing those little demons”
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The whole Thursday and the day before had been an emotional rollercoaster, so I expected to get the sleep I deserved. But sometimes things don’t go as planned. Just like my life, really.
The first night that I slept in my old room was just a blessing. No alarm clocks were rushing me out of bed, no angry faces were shaking me out of sleep, and no boring tasks were waiting for me in my office’s desk.  
“Aunt, wake up!”
I opened one of my eyes when the curtain was drawn and sunlight hit my face. I was about to bury my head in one of my pillows when the oldest of my nephews, Jiwon, took it away from me and slapped me with it.
“Mommy’s taking us to the park so we can have a picnic as breakfast!”
“And told us to wake you up so you can go with us!”
“Please, auntie! Wake up!”
I wanted to scream. I swear to God I loved those kids, but sometimes they made me think twice about having my own in the future. Yeah, well, it won’t happen anyways. You’re single now, and you’ll probably be forever.
“C’mon auntie! Or mommy will be upset!” Jihwan cried.
“I’m coming, I’m coming!” I sat up, rubbing my eyes. “Go tell your mom that I’ll be downstairs in like 10 minutes”
“Okey dokey!”
Getting ready in the mornings was not my favourite thing to do. I liked to pick whatever was clean in my closet and wear it like it was a Prada dress. Nonetheless, it was never like that for me. I had to be well dressed. I had to wear the actual Prada dress. I just couldn’t choose.
But that day, I could.
After taking a shower, I took my old, worn out pair of jeans out of my suitcase and put them on.
“It’s been so long since I wore these jeans” I whispered, caressing the fabric.
Next, I chose a simple, colourful shirt that I myself had intervened years ago, and tucked it in. The most comfortable pair of sneakers finished my look.
“You look like you’re twenty again”
“Oh Lord Jesus, knock next time!” I shouted, startled by my sister’s voice.
“You’re back to being you. I like that” she smiled at me from the door frame. “But hurry up! These kids are driving me crazy down there”
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Taking a look around that familiar yet so long forgotten park, made me feel emotional once again. That was the reason why I always tried to avoid it every time I decided to return to Namhae. My hometown brought back too many memories, memories that I had decided to erase seven years ago.
But I was tired of it. And at that moment, my future was uncertain — what I had always feared the most. Bringing back painful memories was nothing for me at that point.
“Fluffy is crazy!”
“Give it to me, Hwanie” I took the red dog leash from my youngest nephew’s hand, trying to prevent the huge dog from running around the park chasing the ducks, and probably throwing to the ground the old ladies that were feeding them. “When did this dog get this big?”
“We are feeding him puppy food that makes him stronger, auntie!”
“Well, maybe you shouldn’t d… Fluffly!” the dog was able to release himself from the leash while I was giving wise advice, and started running towards the ducks, leaving us four way too far away to stop him before a massacre happened.
“Oh no!”
I reacted as fast as I could, although I knew I was way too late. My legs were not that fast, and even if they were, how was I supposed to have enough strength to pull him away from innocent ducks and old ladies?
Just when he was about to throw himself over the lake, a man in a black hoodie that covered most of his form took him from his collar and kept him under control. I kept running towards them, busy thinking about what that crazy dog would do to the stranger if he made a false step.
But I was stunned — and out of breath — when I found out that the beast was happily wagging his tail to the man, while he petted him. “Are you still misbehaving, Fluffy? Didn’t I teach you to stay calm near the ducks?”
“Uhm… hi?” I breathed out, trying to call attention to the man who still had his back to me. “The dog…”
“Are you still struggling to ta…”
My eyes watered in a matter of seconds. The man that I was successfully avoiding for years was standing right in front of me, looking the way I remembered him, like seven years had done nothing to him.
But he looked tired. Like he was going through hell and was needing a break from it all. His eyes had all the time shown his feelings, and back then, I was the only one able to read him like an open book. I knew in an instant that he was feeling like crap, but there was something else.
And maybe he was not the man that I used to know. Well, not maybe. He wasn’t the Choi San I had been in love with. The Choi San that I had cherished like no one else, who I had wanted to spend the rest of my life with and grow old together.
And I was not the same either.
“I…”
“It’s been so long” he sighed, looking me in the eye. I felt intimidated. I had forgotten how powerful his glances were, no matter the situation. He had always managed to do that to me, and I wasn’t ready to go through it once again. I had been invested in studying his glances way too many times in the past, and I was never able to reach a reasonable conclusion. So I just settled for leaving that matter alone.
“Yeah…” I exhaled, playing with the read leash in my hands.
“I didn’t know you were visiting your family”
“You know when I come here?”
“Of course I do. Everybody knows. It’s a small town, y/n”
I closed my eyes tightly upon hearing my name leave his lips. I felt like crying all over again, and I wasn’t willing to let him see me like that anymore. He had had enough of it. We both had.
“Should have guessed it” I nodded, looking down and avoiding his gaze. “Can you give me Fluffy back?”  
“Oh yeah, sorry” he petted the dog for the last time while I secured the leash back on his collar “He’s been misbehaving a lot lately”
“You know him?”
“I helped Eunjung a couple of times with him. She told me it’s been hard to keep him quiet when they take him out to the park so I offered to help. I need to take a break from life sometimes, and he’s great company”
“He seems to like you a lot” I smiled weakly, looking down at the happy dog who was still wagging his tail while looking at San with what seemed like adoration.
“I think so, yeah” he giggled softly, petting him once again. “He’s nice, but he needs some rules before it goes out of hand”
“I’ll make sure to tame him, then”
“You’re staying?” I mustered all of my courage, and looked up to meet his eyes. His voice tone had changed tremendously, but I wasn’t sure what that meant. This was a new Choi San for me after all.
“For some weeks, yeah. I still don’t know how many, to be honest”
“You’re on a little vacation with your boyfriend?”
“I…” I was about to reply, but then it just hit me. I was talking to Choi San, the man that had marked my whole existence with burning, hurtful words. He had given me everything and taken it away from me as fast as he could. So no, I was not giving him explanations. “Yeah. Well, goodbye, San.”
And I left as fast as I got there.
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After my encounter with San, I kept thinking about him and everything that happened in those years together. Not only the tragic ending, but also the beautiful things. And that made me realize that I could at least get part of it back.
Although Eunjung saw everything, she didn’t bring it up. She knew that I was struggling — and I’m pretty sure she heard me that night.
So while a soft breeze accompanied me as I was watching the night skies in the petit balcony of my room, I decided to make my way towards the basement to find the boxes full of the stuff I had left there and never used ever again. Many oleos were dry and unusable, but some others seemed to be just fine. I took one of the empty canvases and my easel as well as my collection of paintbrushes, and went back to my balcony.
“How had I missed you” I whispered, looking at my empty canvas. Tears gathered in my eyes, and a sad smile appeared on my lips as they rolled down my cheeks. “I really missed this”
But although I tried, I couldn’t bring myself to do anything more than a soft stroke which was supposed to be the very same night sky above me.
My hand didn’t respond. It was painful.
So I let it all out. My desperate cries were most probably heard around the neighbourhood, but that was my last concern. The only thing that was supposed to make me happy turned out to be a total failure.
I had no purpose. I had ruined my career as a painter years ago. Why would I paint a night sky that would be seen by no one but me? That would be recognized by no one but me?
San was right.
He had been right all along.
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“Why didn’t you tell me that you ran into San yesterday?”
Mornings at home were usually not that noisy, but that day it had to be. My mom had organized a tea party with her girlfriends, and I was supposed to help her out as the only one who was free around the house. My dad was out of town for the weekend because of work, and my sister decided to go out with her sons, probably trying to get away from our mom’s demands.
“Eunjung told you?” I sighed, mixing the cupcake mix faster than I was supposed to so that I could get out of there.
“Yep” she nodded.
“I don’t want to talk about him. You know he’s dead to me”
But even though I said it bluntly, I was feeling like that sentence had no meaning to me anymore.
“You’re being too rude, y/n”
“I’m being honest, mom.” I stopped my eager mixing and looked at her, supporting my weight against the kitchen counter, and crossed my arms over my chest. “I know you and everyone in this town love San. But I don’t, and I don’t want to talk about him anymore. Please”
“Fine” she sighed “Then lend me a hand with the stra— oh Dear God!”
“What’s wrong?”
“I was supposed to bake a strawberry cake but I totally forgot about buying the strawberries”
I rolled my eyes. Totally my mom’s behaviour. “I’ll go to the supermarket. Anything else?”
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I shouldn’t have asked that.
Making my way down the aisles, I struggled to find everything that my mom asked me to buy.
“Where the hell are these fucking powders?” I murmured, slowly walking with my cart and carefully reading each package. “Well, not here”
I looked in front of me to check the signs over the aisles, but my eyes encountered something very different.
A painted night sky.
I knew that painting. I knew that night sky.
Those soft strokes and the shiny details on the moon were familiar. Too familiar.
Of course. They were mine.
And once I understood that I was not looking at an actual painting but the back of an intervened denim jacket, it all came crushing down once again.
But I didn’t have enough time to run away.
He turned around and saw me. I froze like I hadn’t just seen him the day before. My eyes became glossy once again. Keep it together, y/n!
“I thought that yesterday was a coincidence. But I don’t believe that anymore”
San was right in front of me now, a couple of meters away from me. He was carrying some instant noodles in his hands and a bottle of water.
“Let’s not do this, please” I shook my head, tightly gripping the cart’s handle.
“We need to talk, y/n”
“There’s nothing to talk about, San” I gasped, avoiding his eyes.
“If your eyes keep watering whenever you see me and my heart keeps pounding whenever I see you, then yes, there’s a lot of talking to do” he calmly stated, taking a step closer to me “I know you have been avoiding me, and I cannot blame you alone. I also had whenever I knew you were around. But this needs to stop” he sighed “I am aware of the fact that you’re in a relationship and I don’t int—“
“I’m not” I interrupted him, looking at him in the eye “I left him. That’s why I’m here”
“I’m… I’m so sorry to hear that” he said, and I could clearly see the sincerity in his eyes.
“It’s okay…” I whispered.
“Can we please meet so we can finally say whatever we have to say to each other before you leave?”
“San, I… I find it really hard to talk to you” I came clean, playing with the ends of my shirt “You hurt me a lot, and… and I really don’t want to keep digging in the same old scars. But maybe…” I took a deep breath “Maybe it will help to finally close them”
He nodded “I know, y/n. I need this. We need this”
“What about your wife?”
I just had to ask. He knew about me and Seonghwa, so it was only fair.
“It’s a long story, but in a nutshell, I’m divorcing her”
“I’m so—“
“Don’t bother” he shook his head, chuckling with a noticeable pain in his voice “I’m not sorry, so no one should be for me. Especially you.”
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I don’t know why I was so nervous. It was just San. Choi San, that beautiful, talented and perfect man.
And that was the problem.
Choi San had always been a mystery. A simple mystery. Back then, he liked to show me that he needed to wear nothing more than a dazzling smile to make my day better. He used to take me out at night to stargaze because he thought that I could find inspiration up there.
“You need to paint these, baby” he had said “I know you’ll do an outstanding job”
And of course I painted them. Every single one of them.
“Could you pretty please paint this same sky on the back of my denim jacket?” he had asked.
“Why do you want me to do that, Sanshine?” I had chuckled, looking up from his chest so that I could see his stunning features illuminated by the stars.  
“Because today I feel like I could do anything I want with my life. I have you, so that’s enough” he had replied, sweetly kissing me afterwards.
I hadn’t been enough, though.
My thoughts were abruptly interrupted when I felt his sweet perfume coming near me. I turned my head to my right, and I was able to distinguish his slender form from afar. He was still wearing that denim jacket and carried a large envelope in his hands.
“Hey there” he softly smiled.
“Hi San” I replied, trying to get rid of any sign of desperation in my voice.
“Do you want us to stay here or you prefer to go where used to… hang out?”
“I’m perfectly fine here” I sat back down on the bench, and he cautiously did the same, both of us in each end of it. The evening was warm and a nice breeze hit our faces. Although there were no stars yet, they were on their way.
And I honestly wasn’t ready to stargaze with San.
“Shall I start by saying that I am truly sorry?” after some minutes of silence, San broke the ice. “I never meant to hurt you like that. But I know that saying sorry now it’s meaningless. I just want you to let it all out, say the things that you wanted to yell at that 23 year old me but you never got to” the sorrow in his voice was evident, and I believed him. I felt how sorry he was for what he told me that night.
But it still haunted me. So I had to tell him.
“You ruined my dreams, San.” I whispered, already feeling hot tears go down my face. “You were my only fan back then. You encouraged me to keep going, practising, learning, and experimenting. But that night… you just threw that away. Why would you tell me that I was never going to be successful? Why would you yell right at my face that I was talentless?” I sobbed “That my paintings were nothing special and that I would never become a renowned artist if I kept painting night skies, when you were the one who encouraged me to do that in the first place?” And just as he wanted me, I let it all out. “You buried my dreams. You crushed them and you even made sure to throw them to the trash before leaving. I hated you for so long! I despised you! You were my best friend who suddenly became my worst enemy. But why? I just want to know that. I don’t care if you still think that my paintings were garbage. That’s my last concern” I sighed, violently drying the still falling tears “I just want to know why”
I looked at him, and it made me feel a little bit better to know that I was not the only one crying about it. Although he kept silent, his cheeks were soaked, and his eyes reddened and puffy. “You were talking about leaving Namhae” he whispered, looking down at the grass that surrounded us “and I couldn’t go with you, so I just needed you to stay. But after you moved to Seoul, I realized that I was being selfish and that I thought of my happiness over yours. I was going to be happy if you stayed with me, working at the flower shop and painting night skies as a hobby. But you would never have been if you did that” he cried, letting out a sorrowed and choppy breath. “And for the record, I never meant those words, y/n. I never believed that, and I know for a fact that I’m still your number one fan. You are the most talented person I know. You are amazing, and you more than anyone in this world deserve to be recognized out there. I’m so sorry for making you believe the opposite.”
I stayed silent, processing San’s explanation.
If we just had talked it out back then, maybe, just maybe…
“We were young and stupid” I finally replied. “I was trying to get out of Namhae to become an artist and I tried to take you with me. You were building your flower shop here and you tried to make me stay. It was never going to work out even if we tried” I reasoned, getting closer to him.
“But I shouldn’t have said that anyways” he shook his head “I prevented you from pursuing your dreams”
“I was stupid enough to believe that and stopped trying. I should have kept painting despite your words. I now see it” Slowly, San raised his head and looked at me in the eye. I weakly smiled at him, taking one of his hands for the first time in seven years. “I’m sorry too, San. I blamed you for my misery when I was the one who had to go after my dreams anyways”
“We both fucked up. But it’s on the past now, and we’re still young” he tightened his grip on my hand and shook the mysterious envelope with the other “I don’t know about you, but I just came from my attorney’s office. I’m officially divorced”
“I can’t believe our lives turned out this way” I quietly laughed, playing with San’s fingers. “If you had asked my 20 year old self, I probably would have said we were having our own house full of flowers and paintings by now, and why not add a couple of wedding rings. I was delusional”
“Not really, y/n. I expected that as well” his free hand softly caressed my cheek, travelling down to my jaw. He carefully grabbed my chin, making me look at him. I felt my eyes watering again, and San raised an eyebrow, showing me his confused gaze “Is there something wrong, baby?” he whispered.
I let out my tears, because I wasn’t trying to hide them from him anymore. “I’m just happy” I replied “I used to think that seeing you again was a mistake. That living in my luxurious Seoul apartment with a man that I no longer loved was what I needed to live the decent life that I was supposed to have. And now I know that it was just me trying to supress the urge that I had to come back to you. Because despite the horrible ending, you made me be who I am today. You loved me endlessly, San. And I hope you still do” I admitted, blushing like I was that 20 year old once again “Because I know I never stopped loving you, Sanshine. Even when I hated you the most”
He replied in the most beautiful way. A sweet, awaited, and loving kiss.
Although it wasn’t, it felt like the first time. No rushing, no hurting. Just love.
The love that I was waiting to get from someone that actually never loved me like San did.
The love that San was waiting to get from someone that actually never loved him like I did.
The love that we both deserved to get after so long.  
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— jinmindeulle ♥ 
147 notes · View notes
luci-in-trenchcoats · 5 years
Text
Broken Like Me: Dean’s Question Timestamp
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Summary: Dean is ready to make a life changing decision but he’s not sure how to go about it and the one person he would normally talk to is off limits...
Broken Like Me Masterlist
Pairing: Dean x reader
Word Count: 5,000ish
Warnings: language, angst
“Dean,” said Sam, tossing a pillow in his direction from where they sat on the couch. Dean barely flinched, instead shoving it behind his back and keeping his gaze on the TV. “Alright, dude. Something’s wrong.”
“Nothing’s wrong,” said Dean, crossing his arms, trying to focus on the show.
“Yeah. Obviously,” said Sam, rolling his eyes.
“Don’t go Dr. Bram on me, Sammy. I’m fine,” said Dean.
“You got away with that excuse my whole life. Shit’s different now. I know you don’t go regularly anymore so if I see you acting funny, I’m gonna call you out on it,” said Sam. “Did your trip with Y/N not go good?”
“No. It was amazing. I mean the plane part sucked but it was really incredible,” said Dean.
“...well did you have a fight or something before she left for her work conference this week?” asked Sam.
“No. I made her breakfast and dropped her off at the airport yesterday. I just talked to her on the phone half hour ago and she sounded good. She’s been doing really good too lately. You’ve seen her. She doesn’t even think twice about wearing short sleeve shirts anymore,” said Dean.
“If it’s not Y/N then what is it?” asked Sam.
“It is Y/N,” said Dean with a shrug. “It’s just…I love her.”
“Kind of totally obvious dude,” teased Sam.
“No, Sammy. I mean, I really really love her. I know...part of me always knew from the start but...she’s my person, Sam. You know I‘m...you know how my head is and Y/N made me feel like I’m not treading water anymore. You kept me from drowning in it and it’s like she’s the one that pointed out if I just stand up I’d be okay and I won’t drown. It’s not a dig on you, I just-“
“You love her,” said Sam with a smile. “S’okay Dean. I love my new sister too and not just because of what she’s done for you.”
“Yeah,” said Dean, rubbing the back of his neck. “I don’t want to screw it up though. I’m freaking terrified of screwing it up.”
“She’s sort of hopelessly in love with you too, Dean,” said Sam, laughing as he relaxed back into the couch, still watching Dean carefully. “Oh. You want to propose.”
Dean only felt a slight heat in his cheeks as he looked at his younger brother, giving a careful nod.
“You’ve been dating about what, five months?” asked Sam.
“About that. I’m not gonna like, go ask this weekend or anything,” said Dean. “But I know I want to and that someday I will and I don’t…”
“Want to screw it up?” asked Sam. Dean hummed, Sam smiling at him. “How exactly could you screw it up?”
“I say the wrong thing or do the wrong thing or I ask and it’s too soon or I ask and she flat out says no and if she says no then I swear to god I’m calling off all dating forever and-“
Sam stood up and walked out of the family room and into Dean’s kitchen, finding a mug with a cute wolf on it and making some hot chocolate. He shoved it in Dean’s hands, staring at him until he took a sip.
“I don’t have a lot of experience in serious relationships but I don’t think there’s a right and wrong time for any of this crap. You tell her I love you when you love her. You moved in like a month a half ago and you’re even closer, not farther apart. You do stuff when it feels right, not on a timetable. I mean, is she your best friend?” asked Sam.
“Yeah,” said Dean. “Duh.”
“Well she’s yours and best friends want each other to be happy. So instead of thinking of it as worst case for you, ask yourself...would you want your best friend to marry someone they weren’t completely in love with?” asked Sam.
“No,” said Dean with a smile. “I want her to be happy, whether it’s with me or someone else.”
“So stop worrying because she knows that’s the kind of guy you are and you do make her happy. She’s gonna say yes, whenever you do decide to ask,” said Sam.
“You drop any hints about this-“
“I won’t. I promise,” said Sam. “Better now you got that off your chest?”
“A little. There’s another issue actually…”
Two Months Later
“Hey, Dr. Bram,” said Dean, popping his head in his office. He’d only been one other time since his joint session with Y/N and saw the slight concern on the doctor’s face at his out of the blue phone call.
“Dean,” said Dr. Bram, giving him a smile. “It’s been a while. How are things?”
“Good. I’m good,” said Dean. Dr. Bram shut the door behind him, Dean sitting down in his usual spot, immediately taking some candy from the bowl.
“So what’s up?” asked Dr. Bram, taking a seat in his chair across from Dean.
“I...I’ve asked a few different people about this but I still don’t know the answer,” said Dean.
“Some questions other people can’t answer for you, Dean and you know I’m not going to give you one. I’ll help you lay it all out but I won’t make a decision for you,” he said.
“I know,” said Dean with a shy smirk. “It’s why I wanted to talk to you.”
“So what do you want to talk about?” asked Dr. Bram.
“I want...I’m going to propose to Y/N. I don’t know when but once I figure out how I want to do it, I will,” said Dean.
“That doesn’t sound like a question,” said Dr. Bram with a soft smile. “Before we get to your question, I would like to talk about you proposing since it’s a very large life step.”
“Like what?” asked Dean.
“How many years have I known you, Dean?” asked Dr. Bram.
“About 27,” said Dean.
“So basically your whole life,” he said.
“Basically,” said Dean. “Not sure where you’re going with this…”
“It’s pretty unique. Most therapists don’t deal with a child and then watch that child grow up and turn into a man,” said Dr. Bram.
“Dude. The point you’re making is going way over my head,” said Dean.
“From the moment you walked in this room, correction, were dragged in this room by your parents and took a swing at me…” said Dr. Bram, Dean holding up his hands.
“Hey. Not my fault a 4 year old was tougher than you,” said Dean with a laugh.
“From the moment you walked in this room, Dean, you have been afraid. Afraid of something. Always. Afraid your dad left you in that house fire on purpose. Afraid you weren’t wanted, weren’t worth anything, were second class to everyone else. Afraid you were weak, afraid you were a failure, a disappointment, a son, a person, that wasn’t worthy of love. Even as an adult you were afraid to get close, afraid of pain and rejection, afraid you aren’t good enough. You have been afraid your entire life, Dean,” he said.
“And?” asked Dean.
“And now I see you are hopeful about your future with another person. You are happy and I know whatever you’re about to ask isn’t if you deserve Y/N. You are excited, maybe still a bit afraid but all of us are a little afraid, Dean. We have to live with it though and not let it be the main thing that drives us and I know it’s not driving you anymore,” he said.
“Thanks,” said Dean, giving a nod.
“Okay,” said Dr. Bram with a laugh. “Ask your burning question, Dean.”
“I always thought that if I found the right person for me, I would ask that person’s parents permission to marry them. To be respectful and it’s a bit old fashioned and all that but it was always something I thought I would do. But the relationship Y/N has with her parents, the relationship I have with them...I don’t know what I’m supposed to do,” said Dean. “I want to ask but I’m asking people that don’t respect her and I don’t like how poorly they’ve treated her and if that’s the case then what the hell is the point of asking?”
“If you don’t ask, do you think you’ll regret it?” asked Dr. Bram.
“Maybe. To be honest, I don’t care if they say yes or no because it’s Y/N’s choice, not theirs. I always thought I would do that to be respectful to my potential future in laws,” he said.
“If they said no, would you still ask Y/N to marry you?” asked Dr. Bram.
“Yeah,” said Dean.
“Then this isn’t an issue about respecting your in laws Dean, not really. It’s about you wanting to bridge a gap but you’re afraid to put down the first plank,” he said.
“It’s the right thing to do,” said Dean.
“There is no right thing when it comes to marriage and love, Dean. I know your relationship with Y/N, probably better than most other people in your lives. You have the love and partnership part down. You have respect and friendship. Yes, trying to get along with your partner’s family is important but we both know that this situation is not about Y/N. It’s about you,” said Dr. Bram.
“How is this about me?” asked Dean.
“Y/N’s in the street, minding her own business. Maybe she’s picking up a piece of mail that the wind caught out of her hand. You’re in the driveway washing your car. She bends down to grab it just when you see a car come speeding down the road,” said Dr. Bram.
“I remember this question and I’m giving the same answer I gave for Sammy back in the day,” said Dean.
“The point is you want to protect her,” said Dr. Bram.
“You’re married. You have kids. You’re saying the right answer isn’t-“
“Dean,” said Dr. Bram. “Protecting people you care for is not a crime. It’s generally a perfectly healthy thing and I’m not saying you have an unhealthy need to protect Y/N.”
“Give it to me straight then, would you?” asked Dean.
“Well why are you really asking Y/N’s parents permission to marry their daughter?” he asked.
“I already told-“
“No, you didn’t. You’re not a child and you know I have and will never judge you for a single thing you say in this room and I have seen you in some very bad places, Dean. Just be honest with yourself. Why is it so important to ask?” asked Dr. Bram.
Dean closed his eyes, staring at his lap when he opened them a moment later, grabbing the bottom of his flannel and rubbing his fingers over the hem.
“It’s like you said. I’m afraid,” said Dean. “I’m afraid of fucking up everything. I’m 31 years old and I feel like I’m a stupid kid that can’t grow up.”
“Dean,” said Dr. Bram. “We’re taking a break for two minutes.”
Dean sighed but waited out the two minutes, a lot of the negative comments he wanted to make falling away.
“Now, I will ask again why asking is so important to you and I want a real answer this time,” said Dr. Bram.
“I didn’t get along with my dad. I mean, you know how I thought he felt about me and how I felt about myself and that stuff is so much better now. Honestly. But I guess...do you remember that time I wanted to runaway?” asked Dean.
“Yes. You were eight,” said Dr. Bram. “That wasn’t a fun evening.”
“I remember I had to talk to a cop and another woman,” said Dean.
“You were scaring me that night, Dean. I had to make sure that you were in a safe home,” he said.
“I know. I know that,” said Dean. “Dad was so careful around me for months after that, like he didn’t want to upset me.”
“What about the running away, Dean?” he asked.
“Remember...I had a big fight with Sammy. I don’t even remember what over, probably a toy or a game. The kid was only four after all. I remember him saying he hated me and wished I wasn’t his brother. My mom came in and tried to settle things down but she sided with Sam and I just took that as my whole family hates me and wished I wasn’t around. But it was Monday so it was Dr. Bram night. I got here and thought Dr. Bram is nice. He likes me. Maybe he can help me find a family that I’m good enough for,” said Dean.
“You got better after that night,” said Dr. Bram.
“Because I realized that someday I’d grow up and I could find someone I loved and they’d have a family and their family could be my new one,” said Dean.
“You never told me that,” said Dr. Bram.
“I didn’t want to get anyone in trouble again,” said Dean. Dr. Bram pinched the bridge of his nose, Dean looking away. “Dr. Bram, I swear my parents never-“
“I know. I know your parents love you very much,” said Dr. Bram.
“So I...I think it comes from this little kids dream of that was how I got a new family because surely any girl that loved me was going to come from the nicest people there ever were,” he said. “But in reality, they’re assholes.”
“Do you want a new family?” asked Dr. Bram. “No more Sam, no more Mary or John. No more cousins, aunts, uncles...you’re an adult Dean. You’re allowed to leave them behind if you want.”
“No,” said Dean. “They’re my family.”
“So you don’t want a new one?” he asked.
“I want Y/N in it and she is in it. I want her to be happy in it too,” said Dean.
“It sounds to me like you weren’t addressing the right question,” said Dr. Bram.
“It’s not me finding a new family. It’s me being afraid when I ask her parents if they want to join ours they say no...because I know what it’s like to have a bad relationship with my dad and I know what it feels like now that we’ve fixed it, fixed the bad parts. I want that for her too and I don’t want her to get stuck choosing us or them because they are assholes but I want her to have the option,” said Dean.
“See? You knew the whole time why you really wanted to ask,” said Dr. Bram with a smile.
“You are a dick sometimes,” said Dean, shaking his head at him.
“So now that you know the why you want to ask, I think that will help you figure out if you actually will,” he said. “And that’s five bucks to the swear jar.”
“Five bucks? Y/N gets to swear and she said she’s never had to pay-“
“Swear jar, Winchester,” he said. Dean grumbled as he pulled out his wallet and slapped five bucks down in the table. “Are you feeling better now?”
“Not really,” said Dean. Dr. Bram hummed and stood up, going to his computer.
“Alright, you got the next hour booked too so let’s keep going,” he said as he did something on it.
“But it’s Friday. You only do half days,” said Dean.
“Like I said, let’s keep going.”
One Month Later
Dean had to wait until he had an excuse to travel without Y/N knowing about it. Carla invited her out to LA for a few days for a girls trip up the coast, completely and one hundred percent at Dean’s begging so he’d have a chance to get away. After Carla knew why he wanted it a secret, she was down to help but he felt bad about lying to Y/N.
Still, this was something he needed to do on his own.
The flight to Florida was fast and Dean barely checked into his hotel before he was driving to the Y/L/N’s place. A waterfront gated community on a golf course that oozed money and made Dean’s stomach churn. His jaw dropped when he saw their house and realized Y/N grew up in places like this. For a moment he panicked, thinking he wasn’t good enough, didn’t give her enough but paused like he needed to. Y/N was the same chick that wore ten year old sneakers, the same that shopped at Walmart, the same that used her own money she earned and saved the rest for things like her scar surgery.
God, Dean knew she was getting close to going back to the doctor and making a plan with him. Maybe another month or two at most. She’d found a new scar cream that her insurance covered that worked a lot better than the original one, even the few stubborn ones that never faded blending in more. Plus it acted as a sunscreen which Dean was grateful she’d actually been putting on considering how hot and sunny it’s been that spring.
Dean eventually climbed out of the rental car and walked up to the front door, only slightly surprised when a woman opened the door.
“Mr. Winchester?” she asked. “The Y/L/N’s are on the patio. Lunch will be served shortly. Can I get you anything to drink?”
“A bottle of water is fine,” said Dean, the woman smiling as she lead him through a large main hall that went to the back of the house, Dean pausing when he caught a picture on the wall. “She’s adorable.”
“Ms. Y/L/N always impressed me with how she could be throwing a tantrum over being put in a dress one moment and look like a darling angel in front of the camera in the next,” she said with a smile.
“Are you Miss Abby?” asked Dean, the woman smiling. “Y/N’s mentioned you a few times.”
“Abby, sir,” she said with a laugh.
“Well Abby, I’m just Dean,” he said with a chuckle.
“I like you, Dean,” she said, showing him the bathroom and kitchen, Dean catching glimpses of a few more photos along the way. He could see the smile get a bit more forced as the years went on, so subtle he wasn’t surprised these other people didn’t pick up on it. He was pretty sure no one on earth knew Y/N’s smile like he did. “Mr. Winchester has arrived Mr. Y/L/N.”
“Thank you, Abby,” said Y/N’s father, standing from his patio chair, holding a glass of wine in one hand. “Dean, glad you could make it. Flight down okay?”
“Yeah,” said Dean.
“Y/N mentioned when we were in London you’re not a big fan of it,” he said.
“Not really but shorter flights I’m okay with,” said Dean, getting his bottle of water when Abby returned. “Thanks.”
“Abby, give him some wine and put that water in a glass,” he said, Abby quickly taking it back and walking away. “Sorry about that.”
“I asked for a bottle of water so…” said Dean, forgetting about that battle for the moment. He heard the door open again and watched Y/N’s mom step outside in a nice sundress.
“Hello, Dean,” she said, a little cool, not quite cold and Dean was going to run with it for now. After making idle chit chat about his travel and hotel, Abby returned with three plates full of a nice looking cooked salmon and something on the side even Dean wasn’t sure of. He was quiet as he ate, Y/N’s parents talking about how this was one of their summer houses and had a great view of the ocean from the second floor and a wonderful view of the golf course from the back.
Dean hummed as they talked, watching them point out things in the backyard, poking at the dessert fruit salad Abby brought out after a while. It was a nice home and all but Dean could tell why Y/N had hated most of the houses she grew up in. It just felt cold there.
“So Dean, before we chat your ear off, what brings you down to our neck of the woods? You mentioned wanting to talk to us in person and not to tell Y/N about it?” asked Y/N’s father.
“Yes, I did,” said Dean, sitting forward in his seat. “I would like to marry your daughter.”
“You were not very kind to us last we spoke,” said her father.
“I know. I was attempting to protect Y/N from what I saw as something harmful to her,” said Dean.
“We’re her parents,” said her mom.
“Anyone can screw and make a kid. Being a parent is more than that,” said Dean, getting a glare from them both. “Parents do not go years without seeing their child when they have money out their asses and can afford to stop by and visit. They don’t let other people raise their children. They don’t put their children down. They do not blame their child when they are attacked, especially when it was by someone they trusted. All your daughter ever wanted was to be worth your time, to have some attention and that is not selfish of her. It’s human. You were not good parents to her. Plain and simple, you were not. To be honest, I don’t like either one of you but your daughter loves you so I’m going to try for her.”
“If we’re being honest, Dean, I think you’re abrasive, cocky and think you know everything,” said Y/N’s father. “And the old me probably would have tossed you out the door and said good riddance.”
“But last time we saw you, the only time we’ve met you, I saw how true it was when you said we had to change or lose our daughter. We were losing her far before you showed up,” said Y/N’s mom, her face easing some.
“After England and we came home again, we contacted Dr. Bram. He’s been very successful with Y/N and we asked about getting some help for ourselves,” said Y/N’s dad.
“Yourselves?” asked Dean.
“We’ve been seeing a therapist here for close to three months. Twice a week,” said her mom.
“How’s that?” asked Dean.
“We weren’t big fans at first but we think it’s helping,” she said.
“You could apologize to Abby for how you spoke to her earlier. She asked what I wanted, I told her, and you assumed she was incorrect,” said Dean.
“I will. Abby is very much involved with helping us see mistakes along with other members of staff,” said her father.
“It’s not mistakes. You’re just learning how to be a better person,” said Dean.
“That’s insightful,” said Y/N’s mom.
“It’s a Dr. Bram thing,” said Dean.
“Have you gone with Y/N before?” she asked.
“Once. I’m a patient of his as well, have been since I was a kid,” said Dean. He watched them look at each other, lips parting as Dean lifted his chin. “When I say it’s possible to salvage a relationship with Y/N, I’m speaking from personal experience with my own father. But you two have to try like your life depends on it. I listen when you talk on the phone with her. You talk about yourselves a lot and not so much her. You should ask her about her life more. It means more than you realize.”
“You said you came here to ask permission to marry our daughter yet it sounds like you’re trying to tell us how to be parents,” said Y/N’s dad.
“I just want you to be kind and good to her and if you’re not, stay out of her life. Give her that courtesy. She’s a grown woman. She doesn’t need you to raise her. She just needs you to be there for her when she needs it,” said Dean.
“How exactly do you know that?” he asked.
“I have a father that disowned me about a year ago. Now we have the best relationship we’ve ever had in our entire lives. I know it’s only like that because Y/N said things to him I couldn’t, stood up for me when I couldn’t. She wanted him to realize he was hurting me and when he did, he changed, for me. All I’m trying to do is give that back to her. I want you to be a part of our lives, a part of our family, but only if you actually learn what that means,” said Dean.
“Y/N wasn’t in our plan,” said her father after a long few silent moments, staring out across the golf course. “Kids weren’t. Then she showed up and we were so, so happy. When she got home from the hospital, the nanny changed her diapers. You know, I did not change a single one of my daughter’s diapers. I paid someone to do that because that’s how I grew up, both of us. Throw money at problem you don’t want to deal with. At first we only wanted the good parts, the cute baby stuff, none of the mess. But she got bigger, more complicated and we didn’t know when the good was going to come so we got distant and we are fucking assholes for it. We are exactly the stuck up rich assholes you think we are, Dean.”
“And it’s a little too late to ask for forgiveness from a person that has every right to hate us,” said Y/N’s mother.
“She does not hate you. She loves you. You just make her sad and feel bad about herself,” said Dean.
“We can’t fix that damage,” she said.
“Your daughter used to wear long sleeves, all the time. She hid her body away because she was embarrassed of the scars covering it. Now, now she wears pretty sundresses like that one you have on that show off these big things covering her and she doesn’t think twice. Do you know how she got there? Because it took a lot, and I mean a lot, of work to make sure she knew down to her core that I thought she was beautiful. She is. I’m not blind and I see the scars but I don’t see them the same way she does. I see the most amazing woman on earth and she finally sees it too. It’s not too late to try. But it’s not an easy fix and it’s not something you can throw money at,” said Dean.
“You can’t even see how in love with her you are, can you?” asked Y/N’s mom with a smile. “You’re trying to save something for her, even though you despise us. You flew down here when you’re afraid of flying. You’re hopelessly in love with her.”
“I will gladly be hopelessly in love with her for the rest of eternity,” said Dean.
“You have permission to marry our daughter on one condition,” said Y/N’s father.
“Quite frankly sir, I don’t give a shit about your condition. I’m going to ask your daughter to marry me whether I have your blessing or not. I came here to say that no matter what your answer is, you can still be part of our family. All I ask is that you try,” said Dean. “That’s it.”
“You can marry our daughter if you promise to keep loving her the way you so clearly do and fix our mistakes,” he said.
“She’s not broken. She never has been,” said Dean.
“I think you’ll handle the condition just fine,” he said with a sad smile.
“Thank you,” said Dean with a nod, standing up.
“No, please stay,” said Y/N’s mom. “I think we’d both like to talk to you some more.”
“Sure. We can do that.”
“So,” said Sam the next evening, picking Dean up from the airport. “How’d the super secret classified mission go?”
“They’re trying. They’re going to start trying even harder now. That’s good,” said Dean.
“And the asking to marry their daughter thing?” asked Sam, Dean nodding.
“I’m gonna marry, Y/N someday,” said Dean with a soft smile, leaning his head against the window. “I hope.”
“She’s gonna say yes,” teased Sam.
“You don’t know that,” said Dean.
“I totally do know it,” said Sam. “You make her sickeningly happy too.”
“Yeah, yeah. Just take me home, Sammy. I got an engagement to figure out.”
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