#I should go to jail tbh

[megamindsupremacy]

Alternate ending to Under the Red Hood where Bruce fucks up the ultimatum scene by virtue of the fact that he has never used a gun before. I can't decide if it's funnier if he decides to kill the Joker and shoots Jason in the arm instead or if he accidentally shoots the Joker and is just like. Better commit to the bit.

Scenario 1:

Bruce, literally refuses to touch a gun, suddenly holding a gun: oh no. I have to choose between my son and the joker, I cannot let Jason die again. I have to do it

*Shoots Jason*

Jason: WHAT THE FUCK OW-

Bruce: I DIDN'T MEAN TO-

Jason: I KNEW YOU HATED ME BUT DID YOU HAVE TO SHOOT ME ABOUT IT?

Bruce: I DIDN'T MEAN TO IT WAS AN ACCIDENT

Jason: ARE YOU KIDDING ME-

-

Scenario 2

Bruce, accidentally killing the Joker because he, on purpose, never learned how to handle a gun: oh shit-

Jason, eyes wide: you actually killed the joker for me? 🥹

Bruce:

Bruce, dying inside: y-yes. i killed someone with Gun. on purpose. yeah...

#i should make an ask tag #scenario 1- Joker; standing there:🧍‍♂️should i go you guys sound preoccupied #this is what you GET #for never learning GUN SAFETY #as a vigilante in GOTHAM #*wacks bruce with a rolled up newspaper* your hypothetical self who has never touched a gun before that i made up is an idiot #scenario 2 jason is the opposite of 'you KICK miette?' #actually tbh scenario 1 jason is just 'you SHOOT miette? you shoot miette like the Joker? ohhhhhhhhhhh jail for father'

[tarteggs]

many mariks

#marik ishtar #yugioh #ygo #ygo dm #my art #marik doodle dump to go along w the bakura one #i should just do one for each character tbh #unintentionally drew him in the saul goodman pose……… #<<< look at my lawyer dawg im going to jail #OH THE COLORS GOT SO DESATURATED….SAD

[svtskneecaps]

ok folks this lives and dies between us but i swear to god with every passing moment and every new fact i learn i am more and more convinced that had i spoken portuguese at age 11 when i got into minecraft youtube the first time i would BEYOND A SHADOW OF A DOUBT have had a tiny little baby 11 year old celebrity crush on pactw

#qsmp #pactw #qsmp pac #cute? check. funny? check. smart? check. #did a roleplay series; does funny minigames; MAKES funny minigames #like shit dude if i hadn't worked extremely hard to draw extremely thick lines separating myself mentally from content creators i might now #but i've beat myself over the head with the 'being parasocial only ends up with your favs going to jail' stick #i'm cured. no more unnecessary mental turmoil for me #anyway this is secret shhhhh #shut up vic #block game brainrot #like i don't know how he did during the legendary rp serieses he did back then but holy MOTHER OF PEARL he's an amazing rp'er now #this is not a controversial statement and if you think it is meet me behind the chili's and prepare to forfeit your teeth #question; in brazil what restaurant/food joint/location is the designated brawl zone #like usa tends to be waffle house or chili's or denny's or like. a cracker barrel if you're feeling wild #if you're a brazilian inviting somebody to fight you irl as a meme what do you tell them #(if you are not brazilian but read these tags and want to answer with your unique location go for it i love learning) #long tags #i should be asleep tbh but my brain is like 'heeheehee 2012 never left us <3' #gnight friends like this post if you too would have had a celebrity crush on pactw at age 11 or would theoretically have one at age Now lmao

[chill-vibes-but-rainbow-panic]

Rewatched "Slaves to Fashion", and I'm thinking about the ending so much, it makes me feel stupid...

Look at this man. He has no idea what's going on. In his mind he's literally just a golfer, and now he's being arrested for some reason he doesn't know/remember.

Look at his big ol' eyes. He feels so guilty, and he doesn't even know what he did. At least snap him out of the hyponsis first, from his pov, his playing partner just turned into a vigilante and put him in handcuffs. He was just having fun. Playing golf.

This man stole hundreds, if not thousands, of dollars from people, including mostly charity money. But he doesn't know that! He is just A Guy now! He looks like a wet paper towel!

#They gave him the big pupils for the hypnosis effect; but it made him looks so pathetic I feel bad for him #He really went :( #He should go to jail! He deserves it! But like you know??? #I don't know what came over me tbh #darkwing duck #arturo tuskernini #tuskerninni

[supercantaloupe]

if everybody gets their one old dead guy to have intense parasocial beef with then mine is richard wagner

#sasha speaks #i got summoned in my group chat for Orchestra Opinions tonight. ended up ranting about wagner. a good evening for me tbh #as an aside it delights me to no end that my 'i don't think people should go to jail for objectively funny crimes' addition #is now a core link in the reblog chain of that wagnerlawngnomegate post lmaoo

[hauntingblue]

Sanji: I don't even like them but I wanna save them

Luffy: that's my boy

#a dog wanting to eat sanjis food like when he went to give food to his mother 😭😭😭 #what if i shat nyself and cried.... what if i sobbed #I THOUGHT SANJI WAS GONNA STOP THAT KICK NOOOOOOO LUFFFYYYYYYYY HANGING ONTO THE GROUND NOOOOOO #talking tag #watching one piece #epsiode 823 #sanji imagining luffy smiling and he is going to find him in the worst state of his life since marineford.... sanji... #jesus christ!!! ENOUGH!!!!!!!! LEAVE LUFFY ALONE!!!!! #BROOK GOT THE COPY OF THE PONEGLYPHS????? WHEN?????? HE GOT THE THREE OF THEM BEFORE BIG MOM SHOWED UP????? #OMGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!! BROOOOOOOOOOK OMG #back to luffy suffering...... SANJI COME OOOOOOONNNN RUUUUUUN.... well at least luffy got a punch in #oh no...... omg luffy :(((??? nvm its not him but close WAIT SANJI CANT FIND HIM??? #jinbe saved pekoms... so the mafia guy wants to get big moms stuff... #sanjis brothers with the waitresses.....they won't be drunk tomorrow but gettig nami?JAIL #they don't give two shits about reiju to even see where she is so fuck em tomorrow lmao #not like she was going to say anything lmao #reiju should jump out of the window and run like luffy tbh #when sanji says he wants to die tomorrow is not bc of any logical thing but because he feels guilty foe luffy i get it now nvm #sanji looking thru the bodies omg..... his hat of course 😭😭 NOOOOOOOOOO #him trusting luffy to be there SO MUCH!!!!! and he IS THERE #please be there????.......... OH HIS STOMACH GRUMBLING OMG HIS HUNGER GAVE HIM AWAY AJDJAKSJAKSJSKKSJSKS INSANEEEEEEE #did he beat the guy or did they leave him for dead???? jesus has it rained so much ever in one piece or ifs just to set the mood #OMG SANJI CRYING AGAIN NÒOOOOOOOOOO luffy looks like a corpse 😭😭��😭😭 #episode 824 #what is this. no opening no recap just straight up suffering from the start??? ahsjahsk #now the opening after that...... they did something there... oof #luffy smelling the food omg..... he looks like a corpse ENOUGH!!!!!! #sanji berating him and luffy just smiling omg....... eat if you can.... it's the omly thing he can do rn #episode 825 #luffy smiling and the clouds parting and the orquestra version of the opening... sanji saw god right there on the flesh in front of him.....

[puthyflapps]

I need him like water

He lives on a landslide

I cry in his bathroom

He turns off the big light

x

#WE WONT BE TOGETHER / BUT MAYBE THE NEXT LIFE #somebody sedate me #this song finna have me jerking the steering wheel and crashing the car #I need a full version but I don’t know if I could handle it tbh #n e wayyysss she should be in jail for writing this #I can’t see through the tears in my eyes rn but know I’ve crafted a sad shoni scenario to go with this #katie gregson macleod

[lesbiansanemi]

That man is a fucking weirdo

Yeah, thought so 😭😭

When will I learn not to be friendly with male coworkers they all assume it means I want to fuck them 😭😭😭

#like how many have to invite me to threesomes #or go into intense graphic detail about what they want to watch me do with other female coworkers #or insist that I haven’t tried a man like them yet so give it a shot #or CALL ME JAIL BAIT AND TELL ME HOW THEYVE BEEN IN LOVE WITH ME SINCE I WAS THIRTEEN #before I stop being nice to male coworkers they all assume it’s flirting 😭😭😭 #No I just get excited someone shares my interests #but tbh that’s on me a cishet man who likes anime is a red flag I should always run in the opposite direction #rather than try and talk to them about it #kaz rambles #asks

[akkivee]

would be lining up overnight to buy their tickets lmao

#this is vee speaking #we still have the bonus tracks lol but tbh it’s a given i just really want to know who’s the bonus people lol #i think nemu should sing a song lol she’s not in jail that’s great enough reason for her to get up on stage singing the world is a fck LOL #so if we can’t get yotsutsuji pls give us nemu lol #but anyway lol *jazz hands* ye #i can’t really decide between eve and vickeblancka actually so if gencha is sold out i’d go for doppo dice #or vice versa lol #get busy currently has a bit over 300k views and is the most viewed pv atm and i account for about a third of those views LOL #i go to bed with the song stuck in my head sometimes #and wake up in the morning greeting the kuukou and jiro in my head still playing the song lmao #i still wish we could have gotten devil’s flower earlier that way we could get more of jyushi’s band lol but i’ll take it!!!! #i don’t fck with country usually but i will for ​samatoki lol #and i hope ichiro knows i would burn down the world for his song at this point lmao

[tteenagepetulance]

im going to swiftie jail if i critique the insane amount of tractor trailers being used for the eras tour after the jet rant y’all already hated, aren’t i

#im a swiftie blog that’s why i think my favorite international super star should offset her carbon footprint #all the rest of them should too!!!!!!!!!!!! #i just 😪 im putting myself in swiftie jail tbh #i can’t go there again lmao

[yuwumeniji]

HI GUYS NEW OSHI JUST (DROP)PED

#yupersonal #istg he will be the death of me #i think doppio is just a pun-derful guy #i was watching his 2.0 while thinking of another idea .. #i want to write for him #or chat about him #either works lmao lmfao #and his first step goods actually sold me tbh #PIOOOOCHAN!!! #i cant wait to add scythekicks to the list of fannames i'll forget that i should use lmao #also i hope he doesnt go into super mega jail for breaking an airplane if he already went to jail for a car... #nijijail has a new member

[daimoan]

dont remember if i ever was this angry at anyone before

#keep thinking abt [redacted] #wack. tbh #like embarrassing idgaf abt this guy why is he still on my mind. #this is some ego feeding shit like its cool to hate and be angry or something? #its just that i think he should be corrected. but the system is not in agreement on this. #guy was like my best friend for a couple months never even asked abt the system lol n theyr like looking out for him #or i guess mby theyre looking out for me/us. so as to not go to jail/be haunted by our choices our whole lives. #whatever #i know how to make it stop it is just taking time and effort. because its like 1. kind of addictive so i keep accidentaly/habitually reinfo #cing it and 2. the other option is to face that im hurt and i cant do shit about it realy other than ... LeArN from it or some shit #like learn what? i already went full schizoid over this. #maybe i dont need to learn shit lol maybe i already did it :) #so just the pain then. and overcoming the hate habit. and like just letting it go and forgetting abt it #but the thing is that he needs to die i think. #i want to kill kill kill kill him so bad. #i hope hes not reading this in case i ask to meet him again sometime. for business. #maybe thats why its still on my mind #because im unwilling to let go of the idea that we could help eachother if i wasnt so stupid hurt over some little thing (the nasty shit he #pulled that hurt me lol) like bro. bro. im not going to just get over it. like thts rly the thing. 3-5 yrs ago i would have totally just #elected to get over it and make up or smth like that. #and im v unwilling to do that now while lots of my brain architecture is still built for that interaction style. #so when im thinking kill kill kill kill im going to [redacted as fuck im not putting that shit online this is already bad enough] mby im #actually killing the mental structures that make me a target for abuse :))))))))) #all is good in the world i love myself and my life. and absolutely no one else. except my mom and my friends and that one other guy who als #might read my blog but i really doubt it bc he doesnt evenrly ask me how im doing or anything . its cool though. for now.

[theouger]

it's crazy how ougi is literally exactly like me fr fr

#the understanding isn't just literary it's personal. #and this is why ougi is the secret 4th little sister type in the series #(the 3rd is nadeko) #really though understanding ougi this much should be a crime. they should lock me up in jail. truly i'm a misunderstood genius. of ougi #i'm the ouger it's me #in a very real way #we are different in a lot of ways of course but it's no less real #tbh the biggest difference is just that ougi is way more amazing and cooler than me tbh #and is silly in one specific way that i am always going insane and sobbing and shaking and crying about

[lady-of-the-lotus]

wait you don't like novel xy? why not? 🤔

I should probably say I don't like the parts of him I've actually read or seen excerpts of.

I simply don't jibe with him.Much as I love me my villains, I don't wholeheartedly embrace all shapes and forms and draw the line at certain crimes and threats for personal reasons. Also, I actually usually get really into villains who are more along the lines of Loki, Magneto (#Magnetowasright), Erik (Phantom), Count Fosco (The Woman in White--one of my all-time favorite characters)--and from what I've seen of novel!XY, he's even further from my usual type than the cql version.

In short, there was some "that's too much for me" and there was no emotional clicking to compensate. I might like him better if I read the I-assume-better-translated version of him in the official novels. I very much rely on writing style and realistic dialogue when it comes to books, which is why I find it hard to connect to anyone in poor translations, no matter how good the original work. I recently gave up on The Man in the Iron Mask halfway through to wait for a different translation to come into the library as the one I was reading (from a major classics publisher!) was so poor as to be distracting. (Still bitter about how that one got published.)

I'm sure people have great reasons for liking novel!XY and am glad he made enough of an impression on readers for him to get the screen time he did in cql!

#Loki has also said some things I've had to rationalize away #you can probably see where I'm going with all this #side note please read The Woman in White I beg of you #I am restraining myself from complaining about Dumas #and giving my thoughts on the Three Musketeers #they should all be in jail!!!! #okay the restraining didn't work #great book though highly recommend it #just the Three Musketeers are degenerate criminals #Milady I would appreciate you #good news is that The Count of Monte Cristo is way better than The Man in the Iron Mask so far #of course the count lost my sympathy already #though it seems like Dumas somewhat expects that based off him calling his treatment of his servant “cruel” #on the other hand it seems like Dumas wants us to cheer him on while he helps bandits escape #I don't think Dumas gave it the same thought I did tbh given his writing habits #I just want to sit down with Dumas and ask him what the heck was the point of that horrifying pages-long digression #into the backstory of the bandit king Luigi supplants??? #seriously #also why the hashish scene what was the point? #okay got that off my chest #ask tag

[dogboyslick]

also i think the funniest thing rn is that this account is open in an incognito tab and my main is open in my regular firefox tabs like. dual-wielding tumblr blogs rn

#leoposting #i should go to bed tbh. i will be free from post jail when i awaken

[guttednights]

your bar.

You've worked in the same bar for the past 3 years. It's fairly common for military men to come in and get drinks together. It's always soap, gaz, price, and the one in a mask.

One night you finally speak to the guy in the skull mask. "your name is?" as he looks at you, his cold eyes lighten.

"ghost," he said gruffly when soap elbowed him, he shot soap a glare and sighed making eye contact with you. "Simon. simon Riley." he gruffs.

you can't help but smile. "well then Simon Riley. want your usual?"

"Please," he says coldly

you and your friend spent the rest of the night talking about simon. "god i dont know what it is about him but." "jeez.."

"oh ew! shut up" your friend replies walking to the other side of the bar

you giggle "ah cmon, its not as nasty as you and your thing for that old one.

she giggles. "price is hot because hes a gentle man. simon just looks like he could hurt anyone."

"thats what i like" "feels like hed go to jail for me"

She rolls her eyes "okay mrs delusional."

the next few days some tension between you and simon grew. he cant keep his eyes off you. your literal eyecandy to him. and you notice.

"sarah he keeps staring" you say entering the back to "refill something"

she squeals. "girl hes so into you!"

you roll your eyes, "oh whatever."

Later that night soap walks up to the bar,

"hey y/n, you know my big friend Simon? ya he wants ye number"

your heart practically stops beating. "uh.. yeah sure here" You quickly write it on a napkin and hand it to him. you watch as soap runs away like a schoolgirl giggling to Simon as he hands it to him.

the whole rest of the night you were shocked. The big huffy man you think is hot wanted your number?

around 2 am you jolt awake as your phone buzzes. you grab your phone, its him.

"hey gorgeous its simon, or "big masked man"

"Hi simon" god you cant believe this is happening is this real?

"you should be asleep. what you doing up?"

ur heart flutters, (GOING FERAL LIKE YES PLS BOSS ME AROUND) "couldnt sleep"

"any reason why?"

(yes Simon ur the reason why) "nope no praticular reason why, just one of those nights."

"alright. want to get coffee tomorrow?"

"coffee?!" you think to yourself "Omg it's happening.."

"id love to get coffee"

"great. ill see you at happy cafs tomorrow at 9 am."

"see you there"

your freaking out literally, the man of your literal dreams is asking to go out on a coffee date?! Is it a date..?

"is this considered a date?" you text him a few minutes later

"yes, sweetheart. it's considered a date lol"

you throw your phone across the room screaming and kicking your feet. you can't sleep the rest of the night. too busy thinking about what to wear. finally at 6 am you give up and hit the shower, then walk to your closet. "god do I wear a dress? jeans hoodie?" finally you decide on a long-sleeved black dress, perfect for winter. you straighten your hair, do your makeup, and hype yourself up.

8:55 and you're a minute away from the cafe when u see him pull up. your heart drops. you're so excited yet so nervous, u practically black out until you bump into him.

"op, watch out there" he chuckles, "looking at your feet while you walk sweetheart or?"

you chuckle, "Sorry lost in my thoughts." sweetheart?! You can't help but blush as he puts his hand on the lower part of your back and directs you inside. you both sit down at a booth and a waitress comes over. you both order and wait.

you can't help but stare at him, even tho you haven't seen his face his eyes just capture you.

"I'm not gonna lie, sweetheart,. I can't keep my eyes off you at the bar,"

"might as well claim ye before you are no longer available" he smirks as you blush and look away

you spend the next 3 hours just talking getting to know him. And before you know it, (in a few weeks of course) you are dating, officially his. the man of your dreams is officially yours.

side notes: i dont know if i like this tbh. it feels really long and i almost lost what else to say. if u want a part 2 (MAYBE SMUTTY VERS. i can do it lmk!!!)

#call of duty #cod mw2 #cod x reader #ghost cod #ghost fluff #ghost x reader #simon ghost riley #simon riley fluff #older boyfriend ghost #simon riley