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liauditore · 9 months

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The thoughts, hand em over. (No pressure but I wanna hear em :D)

oh god what have u done.

context.

OK SO,. (BE WARNED THIS IS LIKE. REALLY LONG AND BRAINROTTY.)

first off i must put here as per the law i am not in fact armchair psychoanalysing mc youtubers grian and mister scott S. major this is me looking at the 3L series as is it were a performance and their actions in said series as characters and blah blah blah so on so forth this is Fanfiction and Shipping and woowoOOwoo We Are Being Sillyyy with a miku song.

i'm gonna infodump abt a bunch of stuff including some heavy topics like emotional abuse and dubcon (NOT in detail the song just has those vibes)

so uh if you're reading this for Some Reason know that 👍

ALRIGHT WITH THAT OUT OF THE WAY Vampire the song itself is (at least my reading of it) a song about a toxic relationship. The singer is very much not a Good Person and the main chorus is just them disregarding their partner's needs and pushing the relationship even further.

But the singer isn't completely irredeemably evil, since they really do love the person they're abusing (in a childish sense of the word love, anyway) and seem to be at least acutely aware of how they're not really a good person.

But of course, they "eh whatever" these self-reflections pretty fast cus they're having fun with the relationship. This specific set of translyrics reads to me like a bit of self-victimizing as well like "oh, I'm so tortured by feeling like a bad person because of the way I treat you. But I love you so you don't really have a choice but to forgive me."

Speaking of translyrics this is where Micchi's version comes in. While I ADORE Rachie and Anthong's version I do have some nitpicks..? And one of those that I am unreasonably pet peeved by is this right here.

In the original JP version, the lyric is simply kimi mo vampire, meaning simply You're (also) a Vampire. It's alot more obvious a change and hits harder imo than "My little Vampire" which still puts the singer in the position of power.

Micchi's version of the lyrics on the other hand stick a lot closer to the original

And I might just be imagining this but there seems to be a switch in the power dynamic in this version as well. The singer is now inviting their partner to be "rough" with them and the repeating mantra of "you're the ONLY ONE for me" sounds more desperate than anything else.

Micchi's lyrics in general are a bit more wet cat coded. I still prefer Rachie's as a whole but Micchi's singer definitely seems to be more regretful of what they've done and blame themselves for essentially turning their partner into a different, more hostile person. (aka turning them into a vampire lol)

In a lot of ways the vampire metaphor is really unsubtle. Bloodsucking parasite attaches themselves to someone and turns them into a bloodsucking parasite as well.

SO HOW THE FUCK DID I GET GRAIN AND SCOOTER FROM THIS WELL.....

When I think about 3L one of the main things that lights up the lightbulb in my mind is the parallels between all of the four "main" partnerships, with Renchantyn vs Desert Duo as the most obvious comparison point but I think they all mirror and subvert each other really well.

Grian/Scott are like birds of a feather to me in a similar sense that Scott/Cleo are, but while Scott and Cleo have this mutual understanding with each other with Grian it's a bit more complicated.

I CAN't. FOR THE LIFE OF ME. FIND IT AGAIN bUT there was a bit in Third Life when Scott said to Grian "and maybe once our husbands are dead we can be free" and Grian laughs and that basically inspired this Whole Thing 🙏🙏

(an apology for all the wholesome flower husbands shippers who i know follow me cus im about to unleash my full toxic yaoi adaptation of them) (desert duo fans from what ive seen are already insane so you're okay)

In my own mind Grian and Scott are both somewhat.. manipulative? Might be a bit harsh of a word? But they definitely play to survive more than some of the other people stuck in there with them. (cleo too but she sucks at it and she can get her character analysis essay next week)

At least in my view, their partnerships with Jimmy and Scar respectively were born more out of a need for safety in numbers and to get someone to essentially keep them safe until they're no longer of use. Grian definitely felt bad about creeper-ing Scar in the first episode but I don't think he was quite expecting to spend the whole series in debt to him 😭😭

Scott (like the singer in the song oh my god) isn't really a monster so to speak, just someone who has a messed up view of love. Probably has some sort of tragic backstory that explains the way he is that we'll get to see in the anime adaptation idk. He does care for Jimmy but in like.. the way someone might care for and love a pet. You LOVE your dog to fucking death but you wouldn't like.. trust your dog with taxes or respect its autonomy.

also these lyrics are both hilarious to me considering the uh current brainrot.

Grian on the other hand probably Wants to be like Scott and be able to have someone wrapped around his fingers like that but he can't cus it's Scar not Jimmy and he's Grian and not Scott. I imagine he'd get tired of Scar's shenanigans when he's with him but as soon as he's left the room it's all why's it so quiet D: where's scar D:

I like to think that everytime he THINKS he has a handle on Scar finally and can actually stand a chance to survive this thing Scar does something completely unhinged off the wall and Grian's like WAIT WAIT WAIT NO

basically he gets way too attached and doesn't like it and to make it worse he has no idea wtf is going thru Scar's head👍

SO when they eventually team up I think Scott and Grian would have this little "wink wink nudge nudge they don't know" kinda thing going on.

and then in my little fanfiction world somewhere along the line Scott would end up sensing that Oh, We're actually not exactly the same.. interesting.. and kind of start looking at Grian with this sense of amusement/pity cus aww, look at you getting all attached to the person you were planning to betray, that's so cute and Grian would see the worst of himself reflected back to him via Scott. It ends up strengthening Desert Duo's relationship if anything else.

Of course then Jimmy dies and Scott's emotionally destroyed by it but he's still like.. skirting around it. I'd like to think he gaslights himself with any genuine Emotions he has cus like.. he knew this was coming, this is all according to plan, so why would he feel anything for him now that he's gone?

While Scott gets some time to come to terms with the fact that he actually cared about Jimmy too late for him to repair their relationship Grian and Scar end up punching eachother to death in a cactus ring. The End 👍

tl;dr i need to pick up writing fanfics cus oh my god

#asks #HAHAHAHAHA DON'T READ THIS #op is Unhinged #usually im more normal on my main i promise #but writing all this down was fun i should do it more #despite it all this couldve been even fucking longer #if i decided to go even more in depth w/ my toxic yaoi fh and whatnot #cus i do think jimmy ends up catching some bad habits and scotts like oh god what have i done a bit #BUT i am going to draw them again and i can rant abt them there #i think i almost wrote scott too evil here a bit?? but i reassure u he's just a Guy #like trap me in a death game i would manipulate a naive blonde boy too tbh #but i'd end up being grian cus im small and angry and unable to get a proper read on scar goodtimes #heavy brainrot #i might make this songs thing a series i liked doing this alot....#i need a funky lil tag for it.#trafficshipping #<-- for filtering #trafficvocabrainrot

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venomgaia · 1 year

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the golden death

#wips and nae naes.#driftoodles #metphies #king ghidorah #godzilla the planet eater #ill br honest i dont rlly care for the 3d godzilla series. but i DO like metphies #weird lil freak #[i say having watched it multiple times over]#theres just cool symbolism and i specifically really dig the idea of king ghidorah as a quantum anomaly #slash some sort of interdimentional supermassive black hole #its not good bc its a sketchbook doodle please forgive me #i just did sm digital touching up quick on my phone #eye trauma #gore #eye gore #scopophobia #UHH LMK WHAT ELSE I NEED TO TAG #the shading is all over the place but listen. black hole halos

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deadbaguette · 11 months

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See something you like?

#呪術廻戦 #jujutsu kaisen #jjk #geto suguru #getou suguru #suguru geto #he’s my beloved #This is a birthday gift for a friend <333 #us suguru stans need to make up for the misery he’s put through in canon #thinking about making this a series but I try other characters #maybe Gojo or Yuki next #the inspo is also from Twitter for this one btw #rkgk #it’s a lil messy but like rendered at the same time yk what I mean?#sarita tag #deadbaguettesart

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todayisafridaynight · 1 year

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(petty) terms and conditions

#spoilers #ig idk tag rambling #rgg #ryu ga gotoku #ryu ga gotoku 7 #yakuza series #yakuza 7 #yakuza like a dragon #daigo dojima #ryo aoki #masadai #i might as well put it under there #snap sketches #oh god what was i going to type i forget #anyways yeah im terminally ill. putting these two together started as a bit but now im committed #i commit to the bit forever and always #oh yeah i remember what i wanted to say #daigo would never be this sassy but i can hope i can dream i just think he deserves a lil pettiness in his life #the next time i decide to be deranged ill keep him in check dont worry i just needed to bully aoki about his eyebrows #fr the fact masato has thinner brows... he literally did pluck them thats insane....#ok im done being ill for the night bye im playin more y7 with my friend who knows nothing bout rgg tomorrow

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didsomeonesayventus · 1 year

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on one hand I get no joy from KH fanfic anymore on the other oneshot of Sora finding out Young Xehanort made it to Squareville and pinning him for some questions on what the he*k is going on

#katie rambles #an idea briefly inspired by the sketch nomura made awhile ago for DR stuff I think? the umbrella #because I think someone pointed out that despite the blur it looked somewhat like a known landmark over in japan #and (gestures to xehanort's DR comments about needing another life to observe The After of his plans)#but this would require me knowing what's going on #and there is no god damn way im even going to be close to an answer on what's going on #it would be neat if the lil guy is there in 4 + they have some banter over coffee like Normal People but talking about Very Not Normal Thing #(with maybe just a bit of subtext:tm: if you squint i guess)#(for old time's sake yanno)#but like idk. im burned. im tired.#and im not really interested in whatever meta tripe 4 is gonna introduce #it feels so. not kingdom hearts #i think it's really gotten too wild for its own good now #we're launching out of the heartfelt and digestible ruminations on friendship and how it's a vital source of happiness and support #and how it's basically a human right to have a healthy place of community and belonging #and going into just whack ass multiverse whatever that just. idk it bores me #and idk if they can really do it in a way i care about when everything leading up to 3 got shoved in a fucking trash can #like whats the point of following and theorizing if they're just gonna ignore it just to be contrary! for an unearned surprise!!!!!#like fuck man i want to like this series again but 4 has got miles to go before impressing me #old man yells at cloud in tags yada yada let people enjoy the series + 3 wasn't bad whatever im grumpy

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hawnks · 1 year

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Why on earth can anyone be mean to you for gracing us with the precious that is Coincide? Unbelievable.

no one has actually been mean to me abt coincide! sjdjjdjdjd I am just sensitive <3

#lil ramble in the tags u_u #this series has been weird for me because like #with other multi chapter things there are always people who are like ‘can’t wait for the next part!’ which is great and nice #but with coincide it sometimes becomes a little bit more…. demanding?#and eventually the question stopped being ‘when is the next part coming out’ and became ‘is this abandoned’#and that was less than a year into the pause #and it made me anxious because like….no? it’s not abandoned; I’m still here #sometimes I just need a little breathing room before coming back to a fic yknow?#or I need to gaze at wonho for a few hours aparently #mint talks #bumper tag

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inkykeiji · 1 year

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please i need to know the idea for the series for REASONS. reasons being your ideas are the best

HAHAHA anon bb you flatter me <333 aaah i can’t tell you or it’ll spoil it all!!!! the only hint i’ll give you at this point is that it’s based off of the two posts i linked in this ask, which is to say it would have all three todorokis pining for the same girl (*/ω＼*) <33

#ur so cute hehehehehe #ah who knows if it’ll even happen!!!!!#bmb + tag really do need to get done first #it’s unfair to both of those stories if i just start writing something new on a whim you know?????#i’m going to let the shouto series idea marinate in my mind for a lil and see if i can flesh it out more :o #i’m happy you’re excited tho anon!!!!!!#i hope your night has been swell so far c:#stay safe and stay hydrated!!! i am sending much love n health ur way <333 #inky.bb #clari gets mail

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kiwisbell · 3 months

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yellow bird [joel miller]

Taking the weight off your shoulders.

whiskey sour masterlist | my masterlist

pairing: joel miller x f!reader

tags/warnings: 18+ (MDNI), dbf!joel, age gap (20s/40s), sexual frustration, academic-validation-to-praise-kink pipeline, these two are in lurvvvv, thigh riding, joel talks you through it, and maybe reveals a side of him we haven't seen yet, a lil fluid exchange, some sweet sappy talk because it's them what do we expect, pure self-indulgence, that’s about it

word count: ~ 2.7k

a/n: this was mine and @cavillscurls's challenge to myself to write somethin short and sweet, thank you mya for being a cheerleader throughout this whole process. and thank you hugely el @northernbluess for last-minute beta reading and telling me it does not(?), in fact, suck dick n cock. i envision this as part of the whiskey sour-verse, but you don't need to read the series to understand what's going on here! this honestly makes me super fucking nervy to post, but i hope you enjoy. xoxo

read on ao3!

follow @kiwisbellupdates and turn on notifications if you'd like to be notified when i post a fic!

The moon is carving a path through the darkening sky, and you’ve been quiet for hours.

You sit at the dining table with your cheek in your palm, lidded eyes flitting relentlessly from one side of the page to another. Every couple minutes, you jot down some notes on your cue cards. Your coffee lies untouched next to your textbook.

Each slash of pen across paper cuts into his chest. You write in bursts of furious energy, the paper sometimes bunching under your fist, black ink smearing—you only ever write in black—one letter into the next. Your jerky looping letters resemble nothing close to your penmanship. Your sentences are punctuated by squiggles rather than dots. The corners of your eyes are moist, your skin glowing gold under a filtered smattering of light from the street lamps outside.

There's a tight line to the curve of your mouth, a gash of colour where your lipstick has faded. Weariness dulls the shimmer in your eye. You keep writing.

“Thought you were goin’ out with your friends tonight,” says Joel.

“Hmm?” You blink slowly, the sound of his voice dragging your gaze toward Joel: dressed in jeans and an olive flannel (a gift from you), he's watching you study, a worried slash between his brows. “Oh,” you say. “No. I bailed.”

A flare of his nostrils as he approaches you from the coffee station is the only indication he gives that he's frustrated. “You’ve been workin’ all day, baby. You haven't eaten.” He slides his coffee mug toward you and switches it with your own. “Here, take mine. Yours is gettin’ cold.”

You start to shake your head. “Joel, it’s—”

“It's either you drink mine,” he says, sliding the milk and sugar toward you, “or you take a break.”

You narrow your eyes. “You hate my coffee.”

“Relationships are sacrifice. C’mere.” He yanks the leg of your chair toward him until you're sitting beside one another. He dips his mouth to your temple, and sleep begins to tug at your eyelids. Still, you keep your books open, if not partially out of spite, as Joel drinks your too-sweet coffee and hides his grimace.

“You hate it.”

Joel’s eyes slide to you over the rim of his cup, his chest pulling taut at the sight of the unshed tear on the outer corner of your eye, teetering.

Your bottom lip wobbles, your last Sisyphean effort to hold the droplet of water at bay, and Joel sets down the mug.

“You hate my coffee,” you whisper, not meeting his eye.

It's the press of his hand to your lower back that makes your fingers tremble, curled tightly around your pen. “There are worse things I’d do for you than drink shitty coffee.”

“So you admit it's shitty.”

His fingers dance up and down your lower vertebrae. “You’re exhausted,” he says softly, his mouth grazing your shoulder. “Come and take a break. Can feel all that tension, sweetheart. Right—”

The warm press of his palm between your shoulder blades. The simple touch ignites pressure behind your nose.

“—here,” he finishes with the pinch of his thumb and forefinger around your brain stem.

Your head lolls gently in his direction. “I know what you're doing.”

An innocent sound pitches out of his throat. “Do you?”

Your lashes flutter as he begins to dig his palm into the tense balls of muscle in your back. The contact, warm and almost gentle, undoes you. The pearl stuck in your lashes shakes free.

The impact of it carving a path down your cheek strikes his heart true. “C’mere, baby.”

Pulling you reluctantly away from your workbooks, Joel sits on the couch and guides you on top of him, your thighs hugging his hips. “This sad face,” he says under his breath, brushing the pad of his thumb over your bottom lip. “So pretty when you’re sad.” Your eyes dip when his stubble ghosts across your jaw, his lips warming the shell of your ear.

You huff, your arms winding around his neck. “You’re wandering into patronising, Miller.”

“Hmm, big words.” His grin carves its shape into your skin. He nips the spot just below your ear and you gasp, your fingers curling in the locks at the nape of his neck. “Told you, baby—such a smart girl.”

You open your mouth to snip at him, but he’s sliding one big, rough hand underneath your silky shorts and pinching your ass. “Tell me what’s wrong,” he says, his pinky finger dipping under your waistband.

“I’m fine,” you grumble, wriggling on his lap. He hums, the downward curve of his mouth on your skin etched in skepticism, his hands pulling you tighter to him.

“Tell me what’s wrong, baby.” His hand slides up your spine, lifting your little silk shirt, the hardness of him caging you in. “Tell me so I can fix it.”

You're gooey and pliant on top of him, hips flexing to fix your thighs around his waist, your body attuned to him in a way you refuse to fight. Joel Miller is yours. He’s always had your back.

“I’m tired, Joel. I keep bombing these stupid fucking tests, and the new guy at work is incompetent, and I haven't had an orgasm in a whole week.”

Sometimes, you're surprised by how deeply you envy your Joel for being so fucking right. For knowing, even when you don't, how deeply your wounds sit.

He frowns up at you, his thumb caressing the curve of your jaw, guilt and understanding pinching his ribs. “And I’ve been workin’ late,” he says.

Silently, you nod, fisting the hem of his shirt. “But that's okay, Joel. I know you work hard. It's not your job to—”

He shakes his head, trailing his hands up and down your soft thighs. “I’ve been workin’ late,” he repeats, his voice thinning, “and I haven't been treating my girl like she deserves.”

Your cheeks warm at the way his hands reach your inner thighs, thumbs ghosting across your hip bones. “That's not true.”

“Baby, you look at me.” He cups you like warm wax and you're melting just the same, gaze sliding up to meet his. Brown, glinting gold as they catch the orange lamplight, his eyes don't leave you. “You need to come?”

Your mouth drops. You really fucking do. If he notices your slip—the way your hips still on his lap, your arms wound tight around his shoulders—he doesn't say nor soothe. “Joel, I didn’t mean to—”

He quiets you with a loving nip at your chin. “You wanna be a good girl?”

A shudder railroads down your vertebrae. Your core is tight, hot, your little pyjama shorts shifting over your pussy, velvet-soft. “Joel, you really don't have to—”

“You wanna come?” he says again, his teeth scraping the shell of your ear before he takes your lobe between them. You gasp, clutching him tight to you, a buoy bobbing above the torrent.

“Yes,” you tell him, breathless, letting him play with the waistband of your shorts. “Yes. I need to come so badly. I’ve missed you so much.”

“I know, sweetheart. I’m a bad man, takin’ my girl for granted.”

It’s not true, he’d never, has not once, and still you whimper at the sound of my girl on his tongue.

“You are a bad man,” you tell him, halfheartedly shoving him in the chest.

“And?” he prompts, drawing the poison from the wound.

“And I need to come.”

Joel’s mouth curves in understanding, the hairs of his moustache bristling in the corners.

“Take ‘em off,” he says. “Let me be good to you.”

You ease your thighs out of your silk shorts, and Joel’s got his hands on your shirt, lifting it up and over your head. A cool shiver snakes from your cool feet, now on the floor as you stand naked before him, to the scruff of your neck. It longs for the touch of his fingers.

“God, you're fuckin’ beautiful.” Joel takes your outstretched hand, tugging you toward him. His palms smooth over the planes of your torso, thick fingers fitting to your ribs, the follower at the altar. It's only when he touches the small of your back that his eyes abstain from their reverent path across your body and meet yours.

“Tell me what you want,” he says plainly, fingers catching at the ends of your hair.

You crowd him, gaze sweeping down his body at the hard length of his cock down his thick thighs and the utter stillness of him when met with your type-A jitters.

“To be your good girl,” you say.

“I know.” It's a whisper in the quiet. Somewhere, distantly, the dishwasher churns through its cycle. A car horn blares. Wind blows. “Sit down.”

You go eagerly to him, your spirit alight with his closeness, the scent of pine and sawdust from a long day’s work, the soft cotton of his flannel, the scrape of his denim along your thighs. Wordlessly, Joel shifts you until you're straddling one of his thighs.

The jolt of pressure to your clit makes you gasp, clawing for purchase on his chest. Your fists wrap around the lining of his flannel.

Oh, God is the vague chant that eats at his liver, chewing on the ripe mass, the wound sealing over to deliver himself once again at your feet. It’s tossed into the space between you, maybe a little blasphemous, maybe thoughtless. It’s the glassy film over your eyes, those irises he could trace in the dark, the call of love that never quiets.

“Feel good?”

The smug bastard. His hand is still soft and sweet on your spine, climbing high only to drop, no longer meeting the resistance of clothing. The cool air puckers your nipples, your body tightening as you pull in on yourself.

“You remember that first night?” he says softly, tucking your hair behind your ear. “You were so cold, baby. All alone and needin' a good strong hand.”

He squeezes your ass, forcing your hips to shift over his leg. The slow grind of your wet seam along the coarse denim makes your thighs tremble. “Fuck,” you whisper. “That's… that’s good.”

He hums like he knows. “You remember what you did that night?” he asks. “Climbed on me, just like this, and made yourself feel good. Thought I’d come in my pants then and there.”

Your breathless laugh hitches in your throat as your hips begin to grind down of their own volition. The friction is rough, unkind, nothing like the gentle press of his hands on your bare skin. Sweat begins to glisten in the hollow of your throat as you throw your head back and lose yourself in the rhythmic roll of your body over his thigh.

“That's it,” he grunts, squeezing your hips, his cock twitching, untouched, in his boxers. You’re smearing your wetness over the denim, washing it dark, letting the light shift over your writhing body. “That's my pretty girl, usin’ me like you need to.”

“Ah, fuck,” you cry out, bearing down the weight of you on his leg, grinding hard against him as you seek your own pleasure.

“Let's hear it,” he urges, gritting his teeth at the sight of your poor swollen clit, needy and glistening, exposed. “Lemme have it, baby girl, c’mon.”

Your moan is strangled, language muddied in your head as Joel surges upright and latches his mouth around your nipple. Biting and sucking raw, his rapacious mouth is warm nectar that pools hot in your belly, his hands coaxing your hips through their movements, guiding you in the dance nonetheless.

“I'm your good girl,” you rasp, the coil pulling tight at the base of your stomach, the hollow bowl filling to the brim, keeping him, coveting him.

“That's right. My good girl.” His hot breath blooms like possessive fingers where his mouth makes contact on your throat, plucking your nerve endings like a bushel of daisies.

“I can feel you, baby girl,” he groans into your throat. “I can feel your tight fuckin’ cunt gettin’ me all wet. Feel you grabbin’ me like a goddamn cat. You close, huh?”

You whimper, your nails scratching at his chest through the fabric of his shirt, your stomach taut as you approach your high, bucking your hips hard against his leg. “Fuck, Joel, fuck! I’m so close—”

“Tell me who you are.”

“I’m a good girl.” You wind your arms around his neck as you begin to list, your breasts pressing into his chest, closeness sparking to flame as your warmth rubs up against him.

He’s steadfast, thick arms holding you upright, as he groans your name into your ear like it's something blasphemous. “Who are you?” he repeats.

“I’m your good girl, Joel! Fuck, I’m yours, your good girl. Oh, God, Joel, please…”

“That's right, sweetheart.” His hand latches around the nape of your neck, slick with sweat, while you bury your face in his throat. “My good girl’s gonna come all over me again, because that's what good girls do, hmm? They make themselves feel good when their bad men go and forget their place.”

You sob his name into the crook of his neck, the friction etching too much into your sore, rubbed-raw flesh. Your thighs hug him tight, hips thrashing hard above him as you come with a shout, your wet mouth dragging along the vein pulsing in his throat and trailing saliva in its wake. Joel doesn’t seem to care, coaxing you through your high when it starts to last a little longer than normal, pulling you so close that you can hardly remember your shape when it’s not slotting into him.

There's a dark spot spreading over his jeans, and your inner thighs are sticky with release. Joel tilts your chin up with his mouth, littering kisses from your jaw to the hollow of your throat. His tongue darts out playfully as his fingers dip between your bodies and tease through your messy slit.

“Joel,” you gasp, your face warm. He lifts two soaked fingers to his mouth and cleans them off with a couple swirls of his tongue.

And he's kissing you before you can retreat into yourself. He turns you inside-out, bares your soul to him, and all you can do is taste the sweet tang of the release you gave yourself.

Your tongues tangle, languid in your mutual exploration, the push-and-pull you've always known. By the time he pulls away to press his lips to your forehead, you're decently sleepy, your muscles gooey and your body slumping sideways in his lap.

“Ruined your jeans,” you mumble.

His fingertips ghost up and down your spine. A cool shudder blooms from each point of contact. He’s still hard, enough that it must ache, but he makes no move to free himself. “I like ‘em this way,” he says.

You roll your eyes. “Such an idiot.”

Clicking his tongue, Joel says, “You treat your elders this way?”

You nip his nose. “Only when they’re sweet on me.”

He chuckles, brushing your hair behind your ear so he can kiss your temple. “You feel okay?”

Your hands slide up his chest, hooking around his neck, your fingers threading together in his hair. “I feel like a million bucks, baby. But next time, you can come inside me.”

The purr registering in your chest has him preening under the attention, his hands coming to rest just above your ass. “I’m gonna tell you what’s going to happen tonight,” he says, ignoring your apprehensive glare. “You're gonna put away your books, and eat a good dinner, which I’ll make, and you’ll rest.”

Your Joel is stubborn in his own way, and it shows in the tension above his brow, the splaying of his hand over your back. You reach for him and smooth out his frown with your thumb. “I’ll do whatever you say, Joel Miller. As long as you make my favourite.”

You could drown happily in the way he smiles. It always comes on slow, like he isn't quite sure of himself, but it will glow in his eyes. It will sing through him like a light through glass.

“Yeah,” he says, “I can do that.”

Your blood calls to him. And you could do it all without him, sure—but he won’t let you.

THE END.

#posting this and running #kiwisbell's fics #joel miller #joel miller x reader #joel miller smut #whiskey sour #joel miller x you #the last of us #joel miller fic #joel miller fanfic #joel #pedro pascal #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller fluff

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maysileeewrites · 4 months

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Don’t Want You Like A Best Friend

17+ content; mdni!

Part I | series masterlist | my Coryo masterlist

summary: You and Coriolanus have been best friends ever since you can remember. You've always thought of him as the protective older brother you’ve never had, but lately, your feelings towards him have changed - not quite so pure and innocent anymore ...

chapter tags/warnings: some best friends to lovers angst and emotional confusion, lots of fluff, slightly ooc Coryo (don't worry, the possessive jealousy borderline crazy obsessive behavior will come in later parts!), a lil smutty treat at the end of the chapter

word count: 5,7k (it’s worth it, I promise!!)

You and Coriolanus have been best friends ever since you can remember.

You’ve grown up together, experienced everything together, with your family living just across the street from Coroy’s family’s apartment.

You’ve been there for each other during the dark days of the war, when both his parents and your father died. You’ve attended the academy together for years.

You’re planning on going to University together as well, though that is still in the future, seeing as it will be a few more months until you’ll both finally graduate the academy.

Really, Coriolanus is such a constant, important aspect in your life, you can’t imagine life without him.

He’s always there for you - whether it be to laugh over a silly joke one of you two made or to hug and console you after a bad day or to look out for you and protect you.

You’re inseparable, really, spending almost every moment together.

Before, you’ve always thought of him as the protective older brother you’ve never had, but lately, your feelings towards him have changed - they’re not quite so pure and innocent anymore.

Lately, you’ve caught yourself staring at Coriolanus more and more often, gaze lingering on his bright blue eyes, his mischievous smirk, his blond curls or his toned, muscled arms or chest.

When he hugs you, you can’t help but notice how good it feels to be pressed against his toned chest, feeling his heartbeat against your skin.

When he reaches out a hand to brush a stray strand of hair from your face, you have to fight the urge to close your eyes and lean into his warm, comforting touch.

When he reaches out to draw you closer, his hand settling possessively on your waist, the first thought in your head is that this - this feels right. You and Coryo together, as close as possible.

And you can’t help but want, no, crave, more of it.

More of Coryo, more of you two together, more of that dizzying, heady feeling you get whenever he touches you that sends your thoughts spiraling and makes your heartbeat go haywire.

You’ve started to crave his touch more and more, always trying to come up with ways to inconspicuously touch him - letting your hand brush against his, laying a hand on his arm to steady yourself or reaching out a hand to brush a stray curl from his forehead.

You feel yourself starting to get addicted to him more and more - and you have no idea how to stop it.

Though, if you’re honest with yourself- you don’t want to stop it.

You want to get lost in this snow storm of feelings.

“Let’s go through this one more time”, Coryo says from his place at your desk, prompting a sigh from you.

“Coryo”, you say, whining, “we’ve been going through this this whole afternoon. I think you’ve got it. Besides, the test is not until next Monday, you’ve got the whole weekend to continue studying - not that you need it.”

“You know that I can’t afford to get anything other than an A on this test, right?”, Coryo replies, sighing.

“And you know that you’ll get an A, even without studying, Coryo”, you reply, finally sitting up from your sprawled-out position on your bed.

You can see Coryo shaking his head, about to say something else, so you hastily add: “Please, Coryo. I know how much you worry about your grades - I get it, I really do. But, you’ve slowly been driving me insane this afternoon, I can’t go through this stuff yet again, at least not right now.”

When Coryo doesn’t reply immediately, you nervously bite down on your lower lip. You didn’t want to sound so mean, but the truth is that he has been driving you crazy this afternoon. You’ve already gone through all your notes of ancient history three times and you really don’t want to go all through 18 pages - front and back, in Coryo’s small, neat handwriting no less - of notes yet again.

Coryo sighs frustratedly.

You look up, only to find his intense gaze fixed on you, his blue eyes boring into yours. “I’m sorry, you’re right”, he says, sighing again and running a hand through his blond curls. “Maybe I just need to take a break-“

“That sounds wonderful”, you say, cutting him off before he has the chance to add a but to his suggestion.

You get up from your bed, walking over to your desk and grab both of Coryo’s hands, trying to get him to get up, but Coryo doesn’t cooperate, becoming a dead weight to you.

“Coryo, come on”, you plead, huffing a sigh of frustration, when he still makes no move to get up.

You take another step closer to him, putting even more strength into the motion of your arms - just when Coryo smirks up at you, before tugging hard on your hands, causing you to stumble forward; right into his lap.

“Asshole!”, you exclaim, pushing against his chest with your hands, but Coryo doesn’t budge.

He just looks up at you with a triumphant smirk, a daring expression in his blue eyes. Daring you to do what exactly, you’re not quite sure. You just know that you’re trapped in his gaze, unable to do anything but look at him and get lost in his blue, blue eyes.

And - this isn’t the first time that something like this has happened lately. In fact, lately you’ve found Coryo’s eyes lingering on you more and more often, his intense gaze seemingly burning you.

And it should frighten you, how much you’ve come to crave the feeling of his eyes on you. And it does, but there’s something else there as well - a yearning for his attention that hasn’t been there before.

The soft sound of Coryo chuckling at your scowling expression draws you out of your thoughts.

“Need some help?”, he asks you, smirking.

You huff a sigh of frustration, trying to push against his chest again - at the same time that Coryo tugs on your arms again, causing you to shift even more forward in his lap, until you’re pressed flush against his strong, muscular chest.

Flustered, you feel your cheeks warming, your heartbeat quickening. Coryo is so, so close to you, you can feel his breath on your skin, his heartbeat under your hands.

And - well, you’re sitting right in his lap, and once you’ve worked through your initial confusion at his sudden closeness, you can feel something else as well. Something hard pressed against your stomach-

Coryo clears his throat then, gently pushing you away. You stumble, disoriented from the sudden motion, but then Coryo’s hand is there on your waist, steadying you.

He leans in even closer towards you, tucking a stray strand of hair behind your ear. He smiles softly, as if nothing has just happened. “You were saying something about taking a break?”

You swallow, trying to calm your still erratic heartbeat and forcing a smile onto your face. “Sure. How about a snack and some hot chocolate?”

“Finally satisfied with all the torture you’ve put me through today?”, you say, yawning, when you see Coriolanus finally closing his folder - you feel like you’ve been studying for ages and you never want to see his ancient history notes ever again.

He laughs softly, the sound reverberating against your back. You don’t quite know how you’ve ended up in this position - both of you on your bed, Coryo sitting behind you, you sitting between his legs, your head leaning against his chest.

It shouldn’t feel so good, being this close to him, especially after that incident earlier this afternoon- that still has your mind reeling and your cheeks heating up whenever you think about it -, but it does.

In fact, now that you’ve got a taste of it, you don’t ever want it to stop.

You bite down hard on your lip, trying - and failing - to stop this dangerous line of thinking. Because allowing yourself to let your thoughts spiral like this, allowing yourself to feel this nervous, heated energy that’s coursing through your veins, instead of suppressing it, like you’ve done until now - is dangerous.

It will only lead you down a road of heartbreak. Yet you can’t seem to find it in you to hit the brakes and stop.

„Torture?“, Coryo now says, drawing you out of your thoughts. „You seem to be in an awfully good mood for suffering through a whole afternoon of torture.“

You can’t help but smile at his words, though you’re glad that Coryo isn’t able to see it - he’d just call you out and tease you for smiling like an idiot to yourself.

„Yes, well, going through eighteen pages of notes - front and back - four times is torture-“, your words are cut off by a surprised, startled yelp, when suddenly, Coryo starts tickling you.

„No - Coryo, please!“, you manage to get out, but he’s unrelenting, only tickling you harder despite your protests.

Both his hands are wrapped around your waist and your back is pressed flush against his broad chest. And even though you’re still giggling, trying to fight him off, you can also feel that nervous, heady feeling that sends your thoughts and heartbeat haywire again.

You give up trying to fight him off, then, which Coryo immediately notices. He laughs softly, before finally ending his tickling attack and resting his head on the crook of your neck. „Enough torture for today?“, he asks and you can hear the smirk in his voice.

You try to turn around to face him then, but both his hands are still on your waist, trapping you in place. „You’re a jerk, you know that, right?“, you say, though your voice doesn’t sound quite as steady and dry as you’d intended it to.

Coriolanus just laughs, the sensation of his warm breath ghosting over your skin causing you to shiver involuntarily. „You’ve never complained before.“

You huff, rolling your eyes. „Well, you’ve never bothered to acknowledge it.“

„Mhm, that’s probably for the best …“

You roll your eyes again - his answer is just so typically Coryo.

„What, no witty retort?“, Coriolanus asks, but you only shake your head, yawning.

„We both know that you can be quite the jerk, ’s nothing new … besides, it’s late …“, you mumble, trying to suppress another yawn and leaning back against his chest again. It is late - already way past eleven, the street outside your window already dark, safe for the streetlights.

You close your eyes, wishing that you could just stay like this, wrapped in Coryo’s comforting embrace, if only for a short moment longer.

„You’re right, it’s late“, Coriolanus now says. „I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have held you up so long, I should get going …“

„Or you could stay.“

The words are out of your mouth before you’ve thought them through and you can feel yourself flushing again. Now, you’re really glad that you’re still facing away from Coriolanus - you feel like you’d die from embarrassment if he could see your face going beet-red.

„I could …“, he says, his voice uncertain.

„Yes … you, uh, could …“, you say, feeling your cheeks heat up. You’re glad that Coriolanus isn’t able to see it - really, you’re just glad that he hasn’t noticed how weird you’ve been acting around him lately, your heartbeat picking up, your cheeks flushing, your hands getting sweaty when being around him; sometimes just from a single touch or a lingering look from Coryo.

It’s not like you’ve never done this before, like this has never happened before. This wouldn’t be the first time that Coriolanus sleeps over at your place. In fact, he used to do so a lot when you were younger, right after his parents died and he was plagued with nightmares. It stopped happening as often when you both got older, and now, it hasn’t happened in years.

And somehow him sleeping over at your place now seems to be something totally different than him sleeping over at your place when you were both little kids.

You’re not little kids anymore - you’ve changed. You both have. Your friendship has changed, evolved as well.

Coriolanus is still your best friend, the one person you wouldn’t want to live without; but somehow, he’s not just that. He means something more to you as well, something else, something much less innocent than friendship-

„Yes, I could - I mean, only if that’s alright with you and your mother-“

„Sure“, you interrupt him, your voice sounding incredibly high and nervous. Fuck, you think, running a hand through your hair, and trying to calm your erratic heartbeat. „I mean, it’s no big deal …“

Lie.

It is a big deal, but it’s probably for the best that Coriolanus doesn’t know that the thought of falling asleep right next to him excites you way more than it probably should.

Coriolanus laughs softly. „Great … Should we get ready for bed then? It’s quite late and you always take ages getting ready for bed-“

„Just admit that you need your beauty sleep“, you interrupt him, teasing him back. You don’t need to turn around to know that he’s rolling his eyes at your remark.

„Exactly“, he says, dryly, before gently losing his embrace and getting up.

You follow him to the bathroom, your mind still spiraling. Just minutes earlier, you were complaining about going through Coryo’s ancient history notes four times; now, you’re following your best friend to the bathroom that’s connected to your room, to get ready for bed - with your best friend who’s sleeping over.

In your bathroom, you hand Coriolanus a spare toothbrush, a comb and a towel, trying to ignore the tingly feeling in your fingertips when your hands brush against his. But then, he draws you closer with one hand, his hand resting on your waist for just a moment too long and you’re blushing again, the thought that you shouldn’t feel so excited and nervous about your best friend sleeping over already forgotten again.

It takes you quite some time to get ready for bed. Not, as Coriolanus keeps insisting, because of your way too long and time consuming evening routine; but because of him distracting you with his lingering touches and stolen glances - messing your hair up again right after you’ve combed through it; catching your gaze in the mirror over the sink again and again while you’re brushing your teeth; drawing you closer just when you’re about to reach for your night cream.

It’s way past midnight when you’re finally laying down in bed - right next to Coriolanus, who turns to look at you with a soft smile on his face after you’ve reached for the bedsheets, drawing them over you both.

He scoots closer to you, before wrapping an arm around your waist, bringing you even closer to him, your back flush against his chest - the gesture so casual and natural, as if it doesn’t make your heartbeat go haywire.

„Good night“, he whispers, before resting his head on the crook of your neck.

Your heart skips a beat then.

„Good- good night, Coryo“, you manage to get out, your voice wobbly.

You close your eyes, though you already know that actually falling asleep will be almost impossible - how are you supposed to just fall asleep with Coriolanus right there, your back pressed against his chest, his hand on your waist, his head resting on the crook of your neck?

No - you probably won’t even catch a single second of sleep this night.

But somehow, that doesn’t sound too bad. (Not when you get to spend the night like this, with your best friend wrapped around you.)

The next morning, you’re the first one awake.

Coriolanus is still soundly asleep, his even breath ghosting over your skin, causing you to shiver. You’re in almost the same position as you were when you fell asleep, with Coriolanus’s hand on your stomach, his head resting on your shoulder.

You were right, you think, yawning, you didn’t get much sleep. It took you ages to fall asleep, your mind still reeling from Coriolanus’s overwhelming closeness. You must have fallen asleep at some point though, because you distinctly remember waking from Coriolanus tightening his hold on you and muttering some unintelligible.

You yawn again, carefully turning around to face Coriolanus.

He’s still asleep.

You can’t help but let your gaze linger on him, study his face - as if you haven’t already memorized every single one of his features. He looks so calm and peaceful when he sleeps, his expression soft and open.

Without thinking, you reach up with one hand and brush a stray blond curl from his forehead. The motion seems to wake Coriolanus though, because his eyes flutter open, and then he’s looking at you - his blue gaze still a bit disoriented, but you feel caught up in his gaze nonetheless.

„Hey“, he says, his voice still a bit sleepy, „sleep well?“

You quickly withdraw your hand, forcing a smile onto your face. „Well, could’ve been better if you hadn’t snored so loudly“, you say, trying to sound nonchalant.

Coriolanus just scoffs. „I do not snore“, he says, indignant.

No, you think, but you still kept me awake all night long, just by having your hand splayed across my stomach, your head resting on my shoulder.

Still, you force yourself to shrug. „Easy for you to say.“

Coriolanus just scoffs again. But even though he’s annoyed by your comment, shooting you another indignant look, you can’t help but think that you want to spend every single morning just like this.

You want to wake up right next to Coriolanus every morning - something you shouldn’t even be thinking about, but something that you still desperately crave nonetheless.

It becomes a habit, then - Coryo sleeping over at your place.

At first, he only does it after one of your study sessions, once or twice a week. But then, it starts happening more and more often - him sleeping over after a movie night (considering that it took you a lot of convincing to get him to finally agree to a movie night, he seems to be enjoying himself quite a lot, cuddling up to you on your living room couch, resting his head on the crook of your neck, sending your heartbeat haywire) or after an evening of cooking together or after a long evening spent together at the Academy’s library, finishing an assignment for Professor Sickle.

At first, you don’t really think anything of it.

But then, one Sunday morning you’re going through your clothes (for once, Coryo didn’t sleep over at your place, because he and Tigris promised the Grandm’am an early breakfast before helping her out with her roses) and suddenly, you realize that there’s a whole stack of Coryo’s clothes in your closet. Dress shirts, plain shirts, pants, even one of his favorite shirts - it’s all here, in your closet.

Without allowing yourself to think too much about it, you grab a simple long-sleeved grey shirt from the stack with Coryo’s clothes and put it on. (It’s oversized, the sleeves way too long, but you don’t care, the shirt is so soft and comfortable. And besides - it still smells like Coryo, like roses and powder and something else, something that’s entirely him.)

After throwing on some simple, comfortable pants as well, you walk over to your bathroom - and startle when you see the box with Coryo’s things on one side of the big, marble sink. A toothbrush, a comb, even a small tube of Tigris’s face cream that he secretly uses - you’re the only one who knows and he’d made you swear not to tell a single living soul that fact.

You smile at the memory, absentmindedly running a hand through your hair and letting your eyes wander through the bathroom.

But everywhere you look, you see Coriolanus. Everything seems to somehow remind you of him.

That towel on the sink, which is lying neatly folded right next to the box with Coryo’s stuff. It’s one of your own towels, nothing special in your opinion - you’ve got lot of other towels and really, a towel is just a towel - but Coryo insists that it’s softer than your other towels and feels better on his skin.

That old butterfly-shaped hairpin of yours, lying abandoned on the windowsill. You only have to look at it to be taken back to Thursday night when you were getting ready for bed, brushing your hair in front of the great mirror over the sink, when suddenly Coryo walked into your bathroom, your old hairpin in hand.

„That’s the hairpin you got for your tenth birthday, isn’t it?“, he asked, smiling to himself.

You nodded. „Yes, I thought about giving it away, maybe gifting it to my little cousin, because I don’t really think that it suits me anymore.“

Coryo’s smile seemed to freeze at your words. „Really? I still think it looks great, look“, he said, drawing you closer with one hand whilst reaching up with his other hand to place to pin in your hair.

„See?“, he said, smiling.

You laughed, shaking your head. „I mean, yes, it’s beautiful, but I’m not ten anymore, Coryo.“

You wanted to put the hairpin away, but Coriolanus insisted on you keeping it just a little longer - maybe you’d change your mind about it.

You reach for that hairpin now, absentmindedly running your fingers over it. Coriolanus is right, the pin is beautiful, even though it looks a bit worn down after years of usage.

You decide to keep the pin, then. Not because you think that you’ll wear it again, but as another reminder of Coryo.

It is in this moment that you realize that your feelings towards your best friend have changed - you no longer view him as just your best friend.

You no longer want him like a best friend.

You don’t want to be just his best friend anymore - you want so much more than that. You want - no need - his attention, want his lingering eyes on you, want his warm, comforting touch before falling asleep, want to wake up next to him, want to feel his lips on yours.

You tighten your grip on the hairpin, until you feel it starting to dig uncomfortably in your skin, but the pain still can’t distract you from your thoughts and the heavy, crushing feeling in your chest.

Because no matter how much you might want to be more than Coryo’s best friend - to him, you’ll never be anything else. He’ll never see you as anything other than his best friend.

It somehow becomes both easier and harder to be around Coryo after your realization.

Easier, because it means that you still get to be around him, get to talk with him, fall asleep with him at your side, ly next to on your bed while he’s motivating you to study.

Harder, because it means that you still get to be around him - all the time. Looking at him, laughing with him, touching him; fantasizing about him in ways that you definitely shouldn’t think about your best friend.

His presence is almost like a drug to you; addicting and intoxicating, leaving you craving more of it, even though you know that it’s not good for you - in the end it’ll be your heart that’ll be broken.

„Something on your mind?“, Coryo’s soft voice draws you out of your thoughts, his hand absentmindedly drawing circles on your back.

It’s already late evening and you’re lying together in your bed - you wearing one of his shirts, which he noticed with a satisfied smirk earlier, over your nightdress.

You shake your head, thankful that Coriolanus can’t see your face, seeing as he’s spooning you from behind. „Not really, no … just all these papers we’ll have to hand in during the next two weeks …“

„Well, if it’s nothing else …“, Coriolanus says, laughing softly, his warm breath tickling against your skin, but something tells you that he doesn’t quite believe your words.

„Nope“, you say, trying to sound nonchalant, before freeing yourself from Coriolanus’s grip, taking off his shirt, so that you’re left in only your lacy, red nightdress.

The distraction works - Coriolanus’s swallows, the expression in his eyes darkening. „Won’t you - uhm, freeze? If you’re only sleeping in that, I mean, it doesn’t look very warm …“, he stutters - actually stutters.

„Freeze?“, you ask, grinning, „with you right next to me?“

Coriolanus just scoffs, rolling his eyes. It’s a discussion you’ve had quite often these last few weeks - with you convinced that his body temperature is too high, and him convinced that yours is running too low.

Though maybe Coryo does have a point and you always feeling so hot when you’re being embraced by him has more to do with your heartbeat quickening and your palms turning sweaty from being so near to him and less with his body temperature.

Suddenly, Coriolanus sits up, leaning in towards you, before closing both his arms around you, caging you in his embrace. Both of his hands are splayed possessively over your stomach, though one feels dangerously close to your chest.

Though - maybe that is just your imagination running wild with you again.

„Warm enough for you?“, Coriolanus asks, resting his head on the crook of your neck, his warm breath tickling your skin.

You laugh, trying not to squirm - you’re insanely ticklish, something Coriolanus very much know. „Yes, Coryo, more than enough …“

„Hm …“, he laughs softly. „Can’t have you freezing now, can I?“, he adds, reaching for your blanket and draping it around you both.

„Hm ...“, you hum, closing your eyes and leaning your head back against his chest. You feel so warm and content, being so close to Coryo. It’s so easy to get lost in your imagination like that, to pretend that you can actually have this with him, to pretend that this is not just your best friend messing around with you - to pretend that he feels the same way you do.

You stay like that for a moment - Coryo holding you in his arms, bodies pressed flush together.

Then, after a while - you can’t tell whether it’s been only a few minutes or a few hours; time always seems to either stop or pass you by in a blur whenever you’re with Coriolanus - he clears his throat, breaking his embrace.

„It’s late, we should probably try to get some sleep …“, he says, trying to suppress a yawn.

You nod, forcing a smile onto your face. „Sure … can’t have your mind in a foggy, exhausted state when you want to make a good impression in Sickle’s class tomorrow morning …“

Coriolanus scoffs, laying down on your bed.

The moment you’ve lain down as well, he scoots closer to you, enclosing you in his arms. Something he does every night when he sleeps over, though your heart still skips a beat at the action.

This is dangerous, you think. You can’t keep thinking about your best friend like that, can’t keep falling and falling for him-

„Good night“, Coriolanus says - and then he does something he’s never done before: he leans in closer towards you, pressing a gentle, soft kiss to your hairline.

Your heartbeat quickens and you can only hope that Coryo won’t be able to pick up on it.

„Good - good night, Coryo“, you say, your voice shaky, barely being able to get the words out.

Coriolanus laughs, before resting his head on the crook of your neck again.

You swallow, trying not to shiver.

This night, it takes you a long time to fall asleep.

When you wake up, Coriolanus has wrapped himself around you, caging you in between his arms, one of his hands splayed possessively across your stomach, his other hand dangerously close to the hem of your admittedly quite short night dress. (You may have decided on deliberately wearing this particular lacy red night dress, seeing as it has made Coriolanus look at you with a dark expression in his eyes when he’d seen you wearing it once before.)

His strong, muscled chest is pressed flush against your back - though that’s not the only thing pressed against your back.

You feel your cheeks heat up when you realize what this means. This has only happened two times before, and both times Coriolanus was quick to embarresedly scoot away from you when he woke up, realizing that his erection had been pressed against your back.

Now, though, Coriolanus seems to be asleep and in no hurry to move away from you. In fact, he suddenly makes a low muffled noise, his grip on you tightening, his hand at the hem of your night dress moving up even higher until you can feel his fingertips brush over the soft skin of your inner thighs.

You can’t help the surprised noise that escapes you then - even though all of this should feel so wrong; it doesn’t.

It doesn’t feel wrong at all. In fact, you want - no, crave even more of this, of you and Coryo pressed so closely together that not even a single leaf could fit between you, Coriolanus’s hands on you, his face pressed into the crook of your neck.

You’re pulled out of your thoughts when Coriolanus suddenly says your name, his lips brushing against your skin, causing you to shiver.

„Cory?“, you ask, trying to turn around, but his grip on you is too tight, keeping you in place.

Then - your name falling from his lips again, followed by a loud, coarse moan.

„Yes, right there - fuck, so good, so good“, Coriolanus moans, one hand suddenly finding its way under the skirt of your night dress, his fingers moving up higher and higher on your thighs, coming dangerously close to the hem of your panties-

„Fuck!“ Another loud moan, followed by Coriolanus’s hips moving against yours, his erection pressing against you.

Oh, you think, cheeks impossibly warm, biting down hard on your lip to keep yourself from making any sound.

Besides your imagination running wild these last few weeks, one dirty fantasy of you and your best friend chasing the other, this has never happened to you. You thought that it never would happen to you - at least not with Coryo.

Though he’s only caught up in a dream of his own, you try to remind yourself, when his hips move against yours again.

It’s only a dream. But why is it your name that he’s moaning then, not any other? But maybe it’s just a coincide-

Every single thought is wiped from your head, when Coriolanus’s fingers brush over your panties, teasing your clit though the thin fabric.

You can’t help the moan that escapes you then - not when this feels so good, Coriolanus’s fingers teasing over your clit, his hips moving against yours, his lips pressed to the skin of your neck, his other hand still splayed across your stomach.

Coriolanus moans your name again then, his fingers cupping your cunt through the thin fabric of your panties, and you find yourself moving your hips against his, driven by pure instinct.

The low, coarse groan that escapes Coriolanus then has you wanting to squeeze your thighs together, but his fingers are still there, still teasing over your clit.

Suddenly, his fingers start to move, drawing teasing circles over your clit, and it’s all too much for you. Overwhelmed by all the different emotions coursing through you, you tear yourself away from his grip, getting up on shaky feet and walking over to the bathroom that’s connected to your bedroom.

Your head is still spinning when you find yourself leaning against the cold, marble walls of the bathroom, your core still aching, yearning for Coriolanus’s touch.

You shiver, even though you feel too hot, your skin feeling like it’s been set on fire. Coriolanus touched you. Your best friend’s fingers were almost inside you and-

Fuck.

Fuck, you’ll never able to look your best friend in the eyes again, even though all you want is to be as close to him as you were moments ago.

Acting on pure instinct, you shimmy out of your nightdress, letting it fall to the floor, before stepping inside the shower. Maybe a good, cold shower, will help, you think, turning on the shower.

You step back, letting the cold water hit your body. But even though the cold water feels like needles prickling against your skin, you still feel as if your entire body was set on fire, your core still aching and empty.

Almost on their own accord, your fingers find their way to your clit. You bite down hard on your lip, trying to blink back the tears in your eyes that are suddenly threatening to spill.

Still, you can’t help the low moan that escapes you when your fingers find their way between your folds.

You close your eyes, letting your head fall back - letting pure instinct take over, as you fuck yourself on your fingers, wishing that it were Coryo’s fingers filling you up instead.

When you come, it’s with a desperate, breathless cry and images of Coriolanus pressed against you playing over and over again in your mind.

What you don’t know, though, is that Coriolanus has been awake all this time - every single touch was a deliberate, strategic move on his part and you’d reacted even better than he could have imagined. He followed you to the bathroom when you got up from bed, and now he’s watching you come undone from his position behind the door that you forgot to properly lock in your haste.

He feels like he’s going crazy, crawling out of his skin as he watches you screw your eyes shut, throwing your head back. Your breathless whimpers and moans are all that he can hear, echoing through his mind.

Wracked with shame, guilt and desire coursing through him, he shoves one hand into his pants, his eyes still fixated on you.

It only takes a few strokes over his already achingly hard length until he comes undone as well.

And when he unravels, it is with your breathless moans echoing through his mind, his eyes on you, and your name like a bittersweet, deadly poison that he just can’t get enough of on his lips.

sooo ...? please, please lmk what you think, I'm so excited to hear your thoughts!

taglist:

@asapkyndall @slitsphilia @ravenclawprincess33 @mckennah123 @serving-targaryen-realness @mentallyyy-unstable @mizuki80 @snows-wife @prettyinsatiable @ashcosmo @generally-awqward @snowflxke @nallasstuff @ajs-222 @spiritofbuddha @notyourwildestdream @earthangel-111 @bhdem @toogardenheart @iheartinkonpaper @daisiesformylove @ebsmind @dominqueeekk @cherrybomb8484 @dangelnleif @minmin1328 @scarletttargaryen

tumblr won’t let me tag some of you guys, please check your settings (settings —> general —> mentions —> anyone) whether anyone can tag you in posts! :)

comment if you want to be added to the taglist!

#coriolanus x reader #coriolanus snow #coriolanus smut #coriolanus x you #coriolanus imagine #coriolanus x y/n #coriolanus snow x reader #coriolanus snow smut #coriolanus snow x you #coryo snow x reader #tom blyth #tom blyth x reader #thg #tbosas #x reader #the ballad of songbirds and snakes #the hunger games #don't want you like a best friend #maysileeewrites

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