#I just give him scritches from time to time

[jungle-angel]

The One With The Fertility Field (Rhett Abbott x Reader)

Summary: You and Rhett decide to have some fun in the back field but you have no idea that it's been the Abbott family fuck spot for generations

Warnings: Smut, implied smut, several generations of fucking, trying for a kid, pet discipline etc.

Tagging: @floydsmuse @attapullman @callmemana @sebsxphia

You moaned loudly as Rhett thrust himself in and out of you, attacking your neck, his animalistic grunting and groaning obscene as it married together with your own noises.

"C'mon baby," he growled. "C'mon I know you've got it in ya, c'mon and cum for daddy!"

His big hands pawed along your thighs and with one more thrust, you both released onto and into each other, panting and out of breath as you came to rest, one on top of the other.

"Holy fuck," Rhett panted. "You're amazing baby."

You giggled a little as he pressed a gentle kiss to your lips, letting you rest against him.

************************************

Cecelia quietly sang along to "Mule Skinner Blues" as it played from the little bluetooth speaker on the counter near the coffee machine. Dinner prep may not have been hers or anyone's favorite part of the day, but at least she had some time to herself and could enjoy most of the peace and quiet before everyone came in for the night.

The peace and quiet was suddenly broken by the opening of a door and the sudden barking of a small dog in the living room. "Hey!" Cecelia shouted. "Shut the fuck up Alberto! You're ok."

Alberto, the little black and tan chihuahua dog leapt from the couch to go and beg for scritches from Royal who hung his hat on the hook and kicked off his boots near the rack.

"Somethin smells pretty good sugar bear," he remarked, Alberto's barking having reached fever pitch.

"Here," Cecelia said, handing him the cardboard paper towel roll. "Use this if you need to."

Luckily, Royal only had to snap his fingers and the little dog sat right down, his little batlike ears pricking straight up and his tail thumping on the floor. "Quit bein a little turd Alberto, nobody wants to hear it," Royal told him.

Alberto yawned and followed him into the kitchen, hopping up onto one of the seats as Royal wrapped his arms around Cecelia and kissed her cheek. "Any idea where (y/n) and Rhett are at?" he asked.

"Nope," Cecelia answered. "Last I heard they were goin for a ride into town and haven't seen head or tail of'em since."

With those last words, the door creaked open and shut once again, Alberto's barking starting again. "Alberto! For shit's sake, knock it off!" Rhett ordered. "I will stick ya'll downstairs so fuckin fast......!"

Alberto finally quit his yapping when you came over to give him scritches behind the ears. You went upstirs to wash up for dinner, hobbling and limping just a little bit, the same going for Rhett.

"You two ok?" Cecelia asked, trying to hide the smile that threatened to crawl across her face.

"M'fine, Ma," Rhett answered. "Why?"

"Well for one thing you and (y/n) were walkin a little funny."

"Walked into a fencepost in the back field Ma," Rhett told her.

"Sure ya did," Royal chuckled as he stirred the pot of meatballs simmering in the marinara sauce. "There ain't no fence near there and hasn't been since the day your Ma and I moved here."

"Wait, which field?" Cecelia asked Rhett.

"Um......the back one near the river towards the north pasture," Rhett answered hesitantly.

Cecelia's eyes went wide and Royal started laughing. "Oh my God," he laughed. "No way, ain't no fuckin way ya'll walked into a fencepost."

"Dad what the hell's so funny?" Rhett asked him.

"Rhett that field was the same field your Ma and I did the nasty in when we were tryin to have you?"

"OH MY GOD!!! DAD WHY??? WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU TELL ME THIS???!!!!!" Rhett blurted out.

"I'm tellin ya because that's where at least four generations of Abbotts were conceived," Royal told him. "Including you and Perry."

"Perry wasn't conceived there," Cecelia reminded him.

"He wasn't?" Royal asked.

"Nah, Perry was conceived in the back seat of your '76 Firebird," Cecelia told him. "I remember because that was the night we went to the drive-in to see 'Conan The Barbarian.'"

"Oh fucking damnit," Rhett said, making a gagging noise.

"What's going on down here?" you asked. "Did I miss something."

"Nope, nope, change of subject," Rhett answered.

"Oh we were just tellin Rhett that ya'll might've stumbled on mine and Royal's favorite fuck spot," Cecelia answered.

You shrieked a little, laughing at the traumatized and exasperated look on your husband's face. The four of you had a good laugh about it over dinner, not daring to say a word in front of Amy lest she repeat it outside of the house.

Yet Royal and Cecelia hadn't been wrong when they had said that a little adventure in the so called "fertility field" would work, for a few days later, you and Rhett were all too happy to find out that Amy would be the proudest big sister in Wabang.

#rhett abbott #rhett abbott x reader #amy abbott #royal abbott #cecelia abbott #royal x cecelia abbott #outer range

[charliemwrites]

Sniff, sniff…. Woof.

“Johnny? Johnny, baby, come here!”

Your big wolf boy comes bounding in from the living room as you shut the front door, immediately rearing up to sniff at your neck and face and hands. Satisfied, he licks your cheek and drops down again.

“Alright, listen up, handsome.” You grab his cheeks, scritching along his jaw and grinning as his big blue eyes go dopey. “My sister and her husband are going to stay the night. You are going to be a polite boy because you love me and don’t want to give my sister anything to talk shit about. Yes?”

A sneeze that he (for once) aims away from you. You laugh, drop a kiss between his eyes.

“Good talk.”

As usual, he follows you through the house as you shed clothes and shoes and bags. You ramble about the grocery store and your day, mostly just to get it out so your headspace can be clear for the evening. Helps to have a little (relatively) listener following at your heels.

He camps out in the bathroom while you shower, licking the glass door until you scold him - per usual. And again when he tries to lick the clean water off your leg. Only starts getting restless and grumpy when he sees you change into “outside” clothes rather than pjs.

You groan as he tries to herd you away from your own closet. Must be mixed with a shepherding dog because he’s a damn pushy jerk.

“Enough, bud,” you sigh. “Look, I don’t wanna go much either. But it’ll be worse if I don’t.”

He mouths off at you, a new thing he’s started up that reminds you of a husky. Maybe you should get one of those doggy DNA tests.

“I know I know,” you coo, shimmying into a pair of pants that your sister won’t be able to tease makes your ass look flat. “I’d rather snuggle up and watch 90s vampire movies too. But I already said I’d go and this means I’ll be able to skip seeing her on her birthday.”

More grumbles, but at least he climbs up on the bed to pout. You finish dressing and head for the vanity - no way you can go out with your sister without makeup.

As you pass, you roll him over to scratch his belly - politely ignoring his reaction. God, you really need to get him in for a neutering. If you catch him humping one more pillow—

When it’s time to go, you drop down to give him one last hug.

“Be good, baby. I’ll be home soon with some new friends. I love you.”

—

After dinner, your sister’s husband suggests a bar. And, of course, it’s a sports bar. Man can’t go more than an hour or two without.

You and your sister chat while his eyes stayed glued to the screens. Well, she chats. You mostly just provide the audience she constantly craves, the validation she always needs.

At some point your excuse yourself to order another drink, weaving between the patrons and sighing at a chance to let your face rest for a moment. While you’re waiting, someone brushes up close behind you, startles you.

“Och, sorry, hen. Madhouse in here.”

You blink, tilt your head back to see a gorgeous pair of blue eyes shining down at you. Takes your breath away.

“Oh! Um, no problem, I get it.”

You try to scoot as much as you can - but it really is packed, especially at the bar - and the man takes the opportunity to occupy any free space you have.

Not that you’re complaining. He’s got the type of face they put on magazines with hooks like “sexiest man alive.” A killer grin as he winks down at you, arm bracing on the bar.

“Buy ya a drink for bein’ so rude?”

You’ve barely gotten the start of, “oh it’s alright,” out before he’s signaling the bartender. His stature and presence gets him instant service though, so you let it go, fidgeting restlessly.

Even his voice sounds like a sin worth committing. He’s too attractive. Too handsome to not know it; and definitely too handsome to be chatting you up and ordering you a drink.

“You here with anyone?” he asks with an edge that makes your spine prickle. Yet you almost feel like you imagine it. His tone is normal, his expression hasn’t changed and yet. Something subsonic in the timbre of his voice, maybe.

“My sister and her husband,” you reply.

“No husband of your own?”

You try to laugh, it comes out strained and awkward. “Ah, the only man in my life has four legs.”

Instead of looking annoyed by the brush off, his eyes spark.

“Dog?”

“Yup!” And okay, alarms in your head aside, you’re always happy to talk about Johnny. He’s a safe topic. You fish your phone out of your back pocket and show him your lock screen.

The man takes a quick look at the screen, an odd, private smile flicking across his face. There and then gone, before those intense eyes are locked on you again.

“He friendly?”

You laugh a bit, perk up as the bartender returns with your drink. “Not with men. Thanks for buying!”

as you turn to go, he grabs your hip. Not hard, or even too low. But you gasp quietly, the heat of his palm searing through your clothes.

“Name’s soap, by the way.”

Infinitely more nervous now, you stutter out your own and then retreat to your sister and her husband.

Spend the rest of the night pretending not to watch Soap. He doesn’t return the courtesy, eyes trained on you, lurking around the bar. So visible it seems to only you. Something about the way the light catches his eyes reminds you of when Johnny senses a threat. When he gets low and growly, hair standing on end, eyes focused.

Soap looks like he’s hunting you.

Thankfully, your sister complains about the noise after an hour or so and the three of you leave. You’re relieved to be going home.

As you step inside, you call for Johnny again.

“Wait, who the hell is Johnny?” your sister’s husband asks, an odd look on his face. “You’re living with someone?”

You snort a bit. Does he seriously not remember you talking about your dog?

“Yeah,” you joke, “he’s the love of my life, my one and only—”

You hear the clack of the doggy door and call out again. Johnny trots in panting.

“Did you just come in from a run?” you chuckle, putting a hand out in greeting.

He comes right up to you, presses his nose to the spot where “Soap” grabbed you and snuffles.

“I know, I smell wrong,” you soothe.

He grumbles and licks at your shirt, but you gently nudge him away, turning as your sister scoffs.

“You still do that thing where you talk to them like people?” She asks. “Don’t you think that’s… childish?”

“Johnny’s basically a person in a human body,” you reply, laughing. “You’ll see.”

“Dogs shouldn’t have human names,” her husband pipes up, reaching for Johnny.

“No, wait—”

Johnny snaps just shy of his fingers and puts himself bodily between you two.

“Easy!” you yelp, hooking your hand in his collar. “Sorry, I meant to warn you - Johnny’s shy with men.”

“He almost took my bloody hand off!”

“He’s just protective. Johnny, heel.”

He stops snarling, but plants himself at your feet right there, eyes sharply trained on your brother in law. Your sister snorts.

“How are you supposed to get men back here, then?”

You jump as Johnny barks, a full deep one that your rarely ever hear. Your sister startles too, then scowls.

“I don’t,” you answer, shaking your head. “Anyway, let me just get the sheets for the spare room and we can call it a night.”

Johnny stays close at your heels the entire time, though you swear he throws a nasty glance back at your sister’s husband.

#thoughts™️ #cod #my writing #fanfiction #dark fic #reader fic

[a-hazbin-reader]

Hii I love your work!

Could you do a (romantic but.. crush stage) headcanon of Alastor helping the reader and the reader gives him a kiss as a thank you and Alastor is like "what the hell was that?" Reader genuinely feeling bad for kissing him and Alastor says "you should be sorry" but then Alastor starts to constantly help the reader (even more than before) and everyone in the hotel knows what he's doing but reader is dense. Then eventually alastor just bursts into her bedroom shouting "FOR FUCK SAKE WHY WONT YOU KISS ME" (maybe not that but same energy)

Please and thank you :>

I'm just gonna...combine these two...

Alastor X Reader Headcanons

✅️Romantic

❌️Platonic

TW: Alastor being jealous, DOORS, Saucy?

Description: ☝️⬆️

You gave affection freely to those around you, everyone got a hug or a small peck on the cheek

So when you're struggling with something and Alastor helps you out? It's only natural for you to give him a quick kiss on the cheek

It's his reaction to it that makes you think you made a mistake in doing so, his body going stiff and gaze dark

You step back as you start to notice a green haze around him and the glass on his monocle cracking

"Don't you ever do that again, my dear."

"I'm-I'm sorry, Alastor-"

"You should be."

And just like that, he's back to normal, carrying on like nothing had happened and humming a jolly tune

But you still feel so guilty for making him so uncomfortable, that was the last thing you wanted

So you work hard to do better, to respect his boundaries and keep a respectful distance

It's not until later when Alastor has time to think about it that he actually realizes that he kinda enjoyed it

And that he's envious of the others who now freely get to soak up your attention and affection for doing little tasks

Like Husk getting scritches and scratches under his chin because he carried a box for you

Angel getting a warm hug with lots of nuzzling and cooing, all because he used his multiple arms to help you cook

Vaggie sheepishly accepting a thank you kiss because she caught you when you almost took a dive down the stairs

Charlie and Niffty are the worst offenders, always helping you and just eating up your praise and hugs

And now whenever Alastor helps you... you just give him a meek thank you and dash off

He's left there waiting for his hug and kiss that won't ever happen

He's not jealous, he told you not to thank him with physical affection

He just didn't realize that he was shooting himself in the foot when he snapped at you

So he starts trying to tempt you into it, taking every opportunity to help you out with every little thing

Alastor will physically shove the others out of the way in order to be the person who helps you out

And he never gets the proper thank you that he's looking for

It's getting to the point where you're driving him insane with those kissy lips and warm embraces

Why won't you just fucking give him some attention!? Oh yeah. Because he ruined it for himself

You do tell him that you're grateful for him and his help, sweetly smiling at him but keeping yourself at a distance

But it's not enough, he wants what everyone else is getting and then some

He hates being excluded or not being special and it's even worse when it comes to you

Alastor's thin patience suddenly snaps when one day while he's out running errands with you

The two of you bump into Zestial and the great overlord opens a door for you, earning a soft kiss on his cheek

It would almost be cute watching you struggle to do that, considering Zestial's height

But instead...Alastor is fucking irritated 😤

Zestial takes it well and you continue to run errands with Alastor for the rest of the day even though he's visibly sulky

His ears are bent back and his eyes are furious

You wonder what you did wrong

He's a bit distant from you for a couple days after that and you miss having him around

Even if you couldn't be with him, you still liked hanging around him and spending time with him

Just when you're starting to feel sorry for yourself and thinking you did something to offend him, wandering the hotel

He shows up by your side and grabs you, miraculously stopping you from almost falling into a fucking hole in the floor that wasn't there yesterday

Charlie is to blame somehow

You're just so happy to see him hanging out with you again that you hug him out instinct

Only to realize you fucked up and try to pull away-

But Alastor's firm grip on you stops you from moving, and he's looking at you in a way that makes your face heat up

"U-uh...um...thank you...Alastor..."

He tuts at you while shaking his head, pulling you flush against him as he leans in closer

"Words won't suffice anymore, my dear~ I'll only accept one thing as payment for my heroic services~"

You definitely don't melt when he suddenly kisses you and if your arms find their way around his neck then...

Who are you to deny him his payment? Kiss that bastard until he's crawling away and begging for mercy

Me hoping I didn't just shoot myself in the foot by bringing up the door thing again..

#hazbin hotel x reader #alastor hazbin hotel x reader #alastor hazbin x reader #alastor x reader #hazbin x reader

[hedgehog-moss]

I meant to go admire a frozen waterfall yesterday, but I'm scared of driving on slippery roads so I ended up abandoning my car and my dreams and just wandering about by foot, following random roads.

(These first two photos are a little bit blurry because I took them while walking, but it does give them a certain je ne sais quoi... They look like childhood memories)

The soles of my boots had zero grip and were therefore great for sliding, so I ended up taking two sticks and using them like cross-country skiing poles to propel myself forward on the iciest portions of the road. It was fun! Pandolf thought I was insane. He was being extremely prudent on the icy patches, testing each step:

At the beginning of our walk he was prancing as usual but then at one point his front paws slipped forward without warning, turning him into a very long slinky dog. It was pretty funny. I laughed. I admit. He wasn't hurt but definitely a bit vexed.

We did leave the icy road on numerous occasions, to slip under fences and cross promising pastures (promising = lots of footprints; potential friends.) We met several creatures! Like this adorable shetland pony—I tried to take a photo from afar, with Pandolf nearby for scale, to show how scandalously tiny he was, but that turned out to be impossible because he was too friendly. Every time I took a step back he took two steps forward. Clearly he thought he was even better-looking from up close.

We also ran into the darling goat I mentioned yesterday, and I was told by several people on here that she looked more like a ewe.

Sorry for the mistake! But also I tried to look further into this and became more and more confused, as every source that mentioned a foolproof way to tell goats from sheep was disproven by another source—I found one that said sheep had a split upper lip while goats didn't (and my mystery friend didn't), but then another website contradicted it. I ended up with 32 tabs open with photos of goats and sheep of all kinds, some of which looked downright bizarre (what's with the Jar Jar Binks ears), and I began losing my grasp on the concept of animal species altogether. I understood how Darwin must have felt when he tried to figure out the differences between species of barnacles and asked people to send him various specimens and ended up with giant teetering piles of wet smelly boxes full of barnacles in his study that threatened to collapse and bury him alive. Then I closed my 32 tabs.

Honestly ever since learning that some sheep have horns and some goats don't, I've been lost. Not to mention, our mystery girl had a sheep-like tail but a goat-like beard. Are there sheep out there with beards and if yes, how do we make sense of the world? We should be able to point at a mammal with a goatee and say "goat" without doubting ourselves. That's my manifesto.

Whatever she was, the goat-ewe was very sweet, and she baa-ed a lot—at first I thought she was making conversation and I politely baa-ed back, before realising she was calling her horse bodyguards, just in case. Two horses soon showed up from behind a tree, very "What seems to be the problem ma'am?"

I offered nose scritches to the friendliest of the two and she went to report to the goat like "We've neutralised the threat."

Let me insert another (blurry) photo of a travelling Pandolf to symbolise the passing of time before moving on to our last encounter:

... I also had trouble taking photos of this one at first, because she kept coming closer to inspect my scarf—I thought she wanted to explore my pockets for potential treats like Pirlouit often does but no, she was very interested in the smell (texture?) of my scarf specifically.

The sky had cleared as we went down from 1300 to 1100m, as if we'd slipped under the clouds, so I tried to take a photo of this nice late-afternoon sky, and the horse finally stopped focusing on my scarf and instead started insistently positioning herself between me and my beautiful landscape.

Look at this lovely golden light in the snow over there which I was almost able to capture!

Meanwhile her pasture mate was eating a whole broom plant, slowly and thoughtfully, which makes me jealous because my llamas are supposed to eat brooms and they mostly don't, they think they're too good for brooms. They eat the very young ones but not adult brooms, so I have to do the work of three llamas and cut them myself. I wish I could send the Pampses as interns in this pasture, to learn the art of brush-clearing from this wise old horse.

I tried to take one last landscape photo and gave up when the aspiring model came to pose again.

Where was Pandolf, you might ask? Pandolf doesn't trust horses, especially large farm horses, and was quietly and insistently trying to convince me to leave. When Model Horse tried to greet him (it looks like she's chasing him but no, she was just stretching her neck to sniff him) he beat a hasty retreat toward the icy road, his former enemy. Some guard dog.

It may sound like Pandolf didn't have a very fun time on this walk, slipping on ice and running from horses, but don't worry, he found plenty of suitable empty pastures to practise his favourite hobby! Though I think at this point he has moved beyond a hobbyist and is ready to play in professional leagues. He does this thing now where he jumps up a bit to gain momentum; I don't remember him doing this last winter. He's an entirely self-taught dog (in the art of snow diving) and I'm proud of him.

#crawling along #(* edit because the first sentence said 'today' but this was yesterday) #(i got distracted by my goat vs sheep studies last night and didn't have time to finish this post!)

[redwinterroses]

It's not like it's hard to get Tango taking about Decked Out, but buy him a couple of potions in the museum speakeasy and he gets downright confessional.

Grian leans across the stat poker table, his wings rustling eagerly. "Truth or dare, Tango," he says. "Is Decked Out... alive?"

“Aren’t I supposed to pick truth or dare before you ask the question?” Tango tosses back another potion and gives the group a half-smirk.

“We all know you’re going to pick truth because you’re too particled to get up.” Etho’s face is obscured, but they can hear the laugh in his voice and see his fox ears twitch with amusement. “So spill.”

Tango shrugs. "Well," he says, "It's not exactly not NOT alive, if you know what I mean."

Grian glances at Doc on his right and Etho on his left. They shrug at him.

"Yeah, no," he says, looking back at Tango. "I don't think we know what that means."

"Is it like that Grumbot robot that Mumbo and Grian built?" Doc asks, scratching thoughtfully at his chin, his blunt black claws scritching loudly against the stubble of his beard. Grian tries to catch a peek at his stat tokens and gives a sheepish grin when Doc notices and quickly angles them away.

"Hey, now," Doc starts to say, but Tango interrupts.

"Nah, no -- I mean, Grumbot was pretty... Simple. No offense."

"None taken." Grian pulls a token from his stack. "Number of villagers traded with," he offers. "And I'll up the ante to three diamond blocks, gentlemen."

Tango lays down his own token, and taps a finger on it in an aimless rhythm. “The dungeon is… aware,” he says. “Not alive, I guess, but it knows things. It recognizes people.”

“I’ve noticed,” Etho says dryly. “That place hates me.”

They all laugh, but Tango shakes his head. “Does it hate you?” he asks and waggles his eyebrows suggestively. “Or does it want to impress you?”

“Oh, I’m impressed enough.” Etho drops his stat token on the table with a soft click. “So it can stop glitching and trying to kill me now.”

“Aww, you’re just playing hard to get.”

Doc lays his tokens down on the table and stands. “I will sit out this round, I think,” he says. “I have done almost nothing with villagers this season. Will anyone have more to drink?”

“I’m not playing hard to get!” Etho protested, ears lying flat. “If anything, I’m playing easy to get – I just walk right in there!”

“You heard it first here, folks,” Tango says. “Etho’s easy.”

He ducks, but not in time to dodge the rolled-up napkin Etho chucks at his face. It lands in his hair and goes up in a miniature whump of flame.

Grian snickers, waving away smoke.

“So if the dungeon’s not alive, but it’s not quite not alive,” he says. “How does one maybe go about… making friends with it?”

“That,” Doc says, thunking a fresh bottle of Cub’s custom-mixed potion onto the table. “Is cheating, you pesky bird. No flirting with the possibly-not-not-alive dungeon.”

“You’re telling me you’re above flirting for a few extra keys and crowns, Doc?” Tango asks with teasing skepticism.

Doc sniffs, flipping the cork from his bottle with his thumb. “I don’t need flirting,” he says dismissively. “I have skills. Game strategies, man.”

“He’s already planning how to get the dungeon’s attention.” Etho flips his token over, exposing the total. “Aren’t’cha, Doc.”

Doc tips back his drink and shrugged. “Eh… that is for me to know, and you to worry about.” He winks.

“Tango, what’s your total there?” Grian fiddles with his token.

“Well, I know it’s higher than old three-digit Minecraft master over here.” Tango holds up his token and pinches it between his fingers. “Under three hundred, Etho? What’ve you been doing all season?”

“Not hiding out in a hole for thirteen months,” Etho grumbles good-naturedly, pushing his diamonds into the center of the table.

“Yeah, well, that’s what I have been doing and look at that stat.” Tango displays the count. “Seven k, baby – read ‘em and weep.”

Grian makes an exaggerated sad face that immediately morphs into a triumphant grin. “Rookie numbers, fellas,” he crows. “Try over twelve thousand.”

Tango groans and rolls his diamonds toward Grian with a grimace. “Yeah,” he says. “Definitely not telling you how to flimflam my dungeon, you shyster.”

“Tango, I’m hurt.” Grian, entirely unbothered and very un-hurt looking, scoops the pile of diamonds into his pouch. “My stats are all ethically earned.”

“And that’s how your dungeon runs will be too.” Tango stashes his tokens and stands. “Gentlemen, it’s been a pleasure. Mostly.”

“Back to your cave, Tango?” Etho doesn’t stand, but his bushy white tail wags a little in barely-contained excitement. “So, Decked Out will be open again… soon?”

“You bet your foxy good looks,” Tango says. “Or… maybe don’t. Not with those stats.”

This time he does duck the thrown napkin.

He exits through the museum, the laughter of his friends fading behind him as he steps out into the cool afternoon air. For a moment, he stretches, shaking out his elytra and clearing his head a bit of the potion particles.

Is Decked Out alive?

Tango grins, sharp teeth glinting. Of course the dungeon’s alive, who’s he kidding? And she’s hungry, too, he can feel it even from here. His friends should just be grateful he’s only ever built friendly monsters that want to devour them.

“On my way,” he mutters to himself. Or the dungeon. “And Etho’ll be coming over soon too.”

He feels the dungeon’s excitement.

“Oh…you’ve gotta be kidding me.” Tango launches himself in the air and spirals over the shopping district, angling toward Decked Out and laughing so loudly the sound bounces off the buildings below.

His dungeon totally has a crush on Etho.

#decked out #tangotek #hermitcraft #redwinterwrites #it's my birthday so maybe reblog this if you enjoyed? 👉👈 #long post

[llamagoddessofficial]

I know it’s been a long time since you’ve wrote about him but do you think you could write about Cheshire Sans dating headcanons?

👁️👁️ oh... it's been so dreadfully long since we played with this harmless fella!

He's just a silly little guy!

... You think

A relationship with him is surprisingly normal. He has a silly personality, a penchant for teleporting and floating, a love of riddles and harmless pranks. But that's seemingly the extent of it.

He knows you aren't going to want to spend forever with someone you can't understand, someone who scares you with their insanity. Spending forever with you is what matters most. So for you? He'll tone down the crazy.

He's very affectionate. I mean - he's literally a cat with his favourite person. Every time you lie down, or sit down, or even just stand still long enough, he slinks on in and wants a cuddle. He likes when you touch his face.

(He's an absolute fiend when he flirts, though. He turns into a cat on the hunt~)

Favourite scritch spots are shoulderblades, cheekbones and skull.

Never underestimate how nice he is to cuddle. You will end up falling asleep. He smells like sweet blue flowers and yarn, the smell gives you good dreams.

Don't worry if you can't actually answer his riddles; he mixes his real riddles with complete nonsense, he really just comes up with them because he likes watching you think.

As far as you're concerned, purring is super common for him. He purrs when he talks to you, he purrs when you talk, he purrs when he cuddles, he purrs when you get mad at him and make that '>:(' face he likes so much. He hardly stops purring.

Purring is far from a common trait of his, though. His fellow Wunderland inhabitants will be shocked to learn he even CAN purr.

He's honestly more of a coffee guy.

Does he get jealous? Absolutely. He likes terrifying guys who flirt with you by completely dropping the persona and giving the grin of death. But he knows that you won't want to stay with him if he turns people into still-screaming meat pretzels... so he just playfully sulks until you give him kisses and assure him he's your favourite.

The entire world is lucky this reality-bending entity adores you so much. He could be ending the world. Instead, he uses his powers to play harmless pranks, teleport you back into bed when he's not done cuddling, and float the groceries so you don't have to carry them. Why would he end the world? You are his world.

He wants a normal life with you. He wants to make you laugh. You bring him (and his moral compass) back from the edge.

You're his most beloved anchor to reality.

#llamagines

[sherwees]

cw: oral (fem received.), dumbification (both), embarrassing (haechan), corny stuck under the bed scenario, practical smothering from.. *reads from sticky note* ass, dubcon, you're embarrassed by haechan, haechan has a nickname, haechan is a loser.

side note : it was really fun making haechan's name pink for some reason, I got all giggly and this is a makeup for that stupid nonsense haechan drabble from months ago.

apart of the corny nct porn plots series !!

you just couldnt fucking find it!

you searched, high and low and around the town for your fucking keys! your roommate, haechan was just on the couch; ogling at your frantic figure running in and out of rooms. he didn't even move a muscle or say a word of concern, he just gazed.

maybe it was the skirt you wore? I mean, the pink nike dunks you wore were pretty cool too. it was definitely the skirt, the rear of it would raise from the dash of wind from your retreating feet. when you would bend over and he'll get a tiny view of the taunting miniature cherries but once he looked closer, they were actually heart shaped and a few of them were carved with the word, “pink”.

but it'll only be for a second, he always sighed in defeat and you would look back with confusion each time.

you were running back to your room again before your hand reflexed to hold the white doorframe to bring your legs to a collected stop. once you finally processed the miniscule slip of silver from under haechan's bed, you squinted.. searching for your palm tree key charm..

your head angled lower before you noticed the familiar edge of a leaf.

they were your keys!

your heart and feet leaped and bounced with joy into the male's room, mindlessly. falling to your knees, you rub them in anticipation with a bite to your lip. “I finally found them!” you lilted with a sense of relief in your soul but they were too far.. they didn't seem that far before?

“uhm, channie?! can you reach these?” you yelled but silence only answered. mumbling a little curse, you crouch and shove your body into the cramped orifice.

little did you know, he was standing right there. he leaned on the wall quite comically, his face expressed a light smirk as he watched you unconsciously wiggle your ass, shoving yourself in there. he could now see the view of your waistband, there was a slogan of some sort on it but he couldn't make it out, quite yet.

haechan found you beautiful, pretty, vulnerable.. he'll compliment you for every little change just to make you all flustered and stuttering. when he would give you the smallest touch or even a caress and you would nearly collapse to your hinds.

the little things do truly count.

you rolled your eyes, huffing a “whatever,”; dragging it out purposely to make him somehow summon. but he didn't, so now you were stuck to an unfortunate circumstance. you were relieved on the fact that there was nothing but maybe some shoes, dust or jewelry that fallen through the cracks, he was fairly clean..

the base of your spine ached, the charm of your heart necklace dangled against the hardwood; it's clanging setting as a reminder of your special valentine's day outing with your “friend” yangyang, your boobs also uncomfortably bulged out of your bra cups.

the scritch–scratch of your nails reaching for the hook of the key became an obnoxious rhythm that just tantalized you like a game of cat and mouse but the key would just slide further to the other side. I mean you could just get from under the bed and go to the other side, matter of fact, you were able to do that since the beginning but you were already here.

also... you really didn't feel like it.

before your wrist could dislocate from your arm, you sighed and rested the joint. your finger unconsciously brushed the key to the other fucking side. you gotta be serious.

you prayed that if god loved you right now, he'll push that key right into your hand. to your avail, nothing happened and even when you stretched out your hand once more, nothing happened. you tried to scooch your way out, your patella frictioned and crackled against the ground uncomfortably, the heels of your feet couldn't flex to the ground.. were you stuck? oh shit.

you sighed before trying to rub your palms against the ground, attempting to slide yourself out but they only slid against the hardwood because of the sweat and dust collected from the ground.

you shut your eyes, contemplating absolutely everything. why wouldn't he just help you? why didn't you just go to the other side? are you late? what the fuck? are those footsteps? is someone here? there was a deep chuckle, causing your eyes to shoot open. haechan liked when you were scared.. confused, just simply unaware.

“hey! I know you're there!” the toe of your shoes bumped against the ground when you wiggled again, your skirt bunched up once more. the air hitting the backs of your thighs only adding more of a cloudiness to your nausea from the clustered atmosphere. your armpits were sweaty, ruining your attractive long sleeve white crop top.. you were a hot mess in your imagination.

hair clumped with balls of lint and dust that'll take hours to comb out, lip gloss smudged on your top lip along with the sweat clinging to your miniscule mustache hairs, mascara possibly not smudged to your hopes.. you didn't really realize how high your skirt was raised, it felt like it was initially ridden up maybe enough to see the underline of your ass but you were full on mooning haechan.

“can you help me..?” you cut yourself off with a cough. “I'm stuck and it's really.. dusty down here!” you whined, tapping the front of your shoes on the ground. you probably creased them but it's whatever. haechan chuckled lightly before walking over, now he could read the waistbands full slogan: “love pink” in a sewn white cursive.

“oh really?” he had that sarcastic surprising tone to his voice that he always teased you with.

“I'm fucking stuck!” you rebutted immediately, trying to use the palm slide out method from before but it only arched your back more, like a cat; the prominent bulge of your pussy poked out a bit more.. he could even make out the small, smooth bump of your labia. he kneeled beside your struggling figure, your wriggling stopped once you felt his hand massage your lower back, his index tracing along your spine until it rested on your ass cheek.

“relax, I'll help you babe..” he reassured, his hand moving to your hip to maneuver your ass on his swelling crotch. you couldn't help but wince at the heat emanating from his growing erection, “haechan..?” you questioned but it came out like a squeak. his hands squeezed on the backs of your hips, his weight pushing you firmly down. “you're so pretty..” he purred whilst gyrating his erection, the tip coincidentally hitting your clothed clit.

“what are you doing? just help me!” haechan just snickered, you tried to look back but you only had view of his grey sweatpants. “you'll be fine.” he said nonchalantly. his hands moved from your hips and slapped on the floor, his head tilted playfully. his eyes were filled with glee along with his lips that tugged into a mischievous grin that made your insides churn with unease.

“besides, I know you'll love it..” he added on to his tease, setting a light slap on your ass. suddenly, his fingers hooked under your waistband; pushing your cherry embroidered panties to your knees. waves of shivers ran through your body as the cool air hit your sodden, pulsating hole; his eyes zoned on the wetness sheened on your plush pussy lips.

“you're so fuckin’ pretty like this,” he growled, his nose prodded at your clit unexpectedly. his large hands groped your cheeks; a resounding clap echoed throughout the room, “I'll be gentle.” you only whimpered before you screamed at the sensation of his tongue darting into your hole, right at your g-spot.

I mean, he was literally smothering himself in your cheeks. you tried to move away from him but his grip was too tight and he wouldn't let go to your prevail. “haechan~ please..” you mumbled whilst blinking constant tears away, your hands balling into fists. he only responded with a slap to your ass, “did I tell you to speak?” he taunted you with a presumed grin.

his hands traveled up your legs, caressing your thighs until he smushed your buttocks in his face once more; you cringed at the disgusting grunt or moan he let out. his tongue worked relentlessly, probing and teasing the warm muscle with a jarring consistency. your back and calves strained, trying to meet with his tongue but he'll only stay at the shallow end; his fingers ghosted and poked at your clit.

“taste s’fucking good..” he groaned once he pulled away, voice husky with desire and drunk from your delicate juices. your stomach swirled with arousal and a weird tension of pleasure that built up at your clit. his hands moved until the waistline of your shirt to cup your breasts; slapping, pinching and squeezing them with vigor.

haechan couldn't bare the tightness of his pants any longer, the mounts of precum that saturated his underwear wasn't ideal. “tell me you want it.” he demanded hoarsely, moving his hand from your clit to readjust his neglected length. “fuck– you taste so good, princess..” he muttered, smacking your ass once again in that same spot.

the pain was less thrilling, the sensations became sore and irritable and even on your tan skin, his handprint will surely visible. with your jaw laying slack on the ground, a puddle of spit evolved on your cheek and your lips grew dry. your throat was beyond irritated from the speckles of dirt and debris that flew and seemingly attached to the back of your throat in lumps.

there was then a pressure, your body trembled and shook; representing your incoming high. “oh fuck–” you slurred, your fingers clenching and unclenching.. really wishing you could just fucking strangle him. something about this made you enraged but it was quickly over thrown when a harsh stinging rushed through your lower region; the warmth of haechan's tongue far gone causing you to shriek and whine, like a child.

“be patient, babes..” you shut your eyes, somehow finding the energy to bite your lips. the corny pet name threw you off so fucking bad, you then realized.

you were fucking, no.. getting TONGUE fucked by your annoying–borderline–obnoxious–hamster–look–alike roommate. not the sexy–maybe–vampire guy that you planned to go out with, and today was valentine's day! and you were spending it, UNDER A BED, sweating, fucked out, hyperventilating, dust everywhere etc etc..

“what the fuck!” you sobbed in real embarrassment, tears welled up in your eyes. he clicked his tongue in mock frustration, you could imagine his jaw clench; “be embarrassed all you want,— there was a shifting of his fabric against his skin before his pants and underwear presumably fell to the ground with a light thud— but I know you want this..” he rasped whilst tugging at his lengthy cock, eyes boring into your heat.

fuck he wanted to taste you again.

his finger spread your moist lips before he attempted to position himself against your indigent hole but the muscle suctioned around it immediately. “fuck, you're a needy one, huh?” he teased, already you could imagine the shit-eating grin on his face before he shoved his quite.. ample cock into you. your body tensed from the unexpectancy and the pure pleasure that coursed through your veins like you were on crack or something..

“you love this, huh? being treated like a fuckin’ slut..” haechan pestered, his hefty tip nudging against your cervix with every shallow thrust. “aw– fuck, channie.” you heaved, your knees nearly buckled; trying to meet his impetuous thrusts.

haechan's hands gripped your hips once again, his gyrations became shockingly and yet excitingly quicker. the back of your hand (which you now realized) covered your mouth, muffling your moans and sobs; tears free falling from your eyes. his torso sheened with sweat, dripping and accumulating between the connection of your moist skin. “oh– fuck please..” you muttered, your tongue slightly lolled out at the familiar pressure building between your legs.

haechan's thrusts of his cock only quickened at the familiar pulsations of your walls, a long groan launching from his throat. “keep– fuck–” his tender bottom lip popped out from his teeth once he stopped his thrusts abruptly; a slip of his precum leaked out of your hole. he was trying to keep his composure but

holy shit.

he eventually resumed, trying to totally keep it together which was totally not working. your beautiful whines, cries and pleads threw him off so bad and your fucking pussy was like.. like..? he couldn't even fucking explain it. “I-I wanna cum inside of you–” he pleaded, he bit his lip and held back a sigh from his embarrassing comment.

“then fucking do it!” you remarked with a whiny pitch to your tone and an unintentional clench. haechan was overcame by that small ministration and took your comment seriously and came immediately, letting out a guttural groan before pulling out. haechan now noticed his bedside mirror, the reflection of him had ruddy cheeks, pupils dilated and plump raw lips. he tried to convince himself that wasn't him. damn he was a loser and he came too fast.

but meanwhile, you laid slack. in shock, confusion and regret; that was such a fucking waste of time. at least you tried convincing yourself that, but you were free! you realized once you slid yourself from under the bed, haechan's back was slumped once he looked at your face; similar to his.

why the fuck did he start crying? before you could even process, you were in his warm embrace. his semi-hard cock laid between your abdomen's uncomfortably, he was mumbling and blabbering about how it was embarrassing that you were his first time and how he didn't even make you cum and how he came too fast and hyperventilating about SEX.

but it's whatever.

“we could always try again..” you clarified, pulling away from him slightly.

he was kinda cute when you noticed his puffy lips and cheeks before the snot running from his nose, he sniffled.

“wait really..?” he asked, eyes filled with wonder and relief.

“yes, really..” he smiled along with you, your heart fucking bursted.. he was so adorable.

“yay! teamwork makes the dream work!”

😽 😽

#nct smut #kpop smut #smut #nct imagines #nct scenarios #nct 127 smut #nct drabbles #nct dream smut #haechan smut #haechan x reader #haechan #nct #nct 127 scenarios #nct 127 #nct dream #nct hard hours

[msbyslilbimbo]

Gojo has a thing for tickling >:(

It’s probably a little something, something he accidentally discovered when he was a teen and harassing poor Suguru because he was just so helpless and looked so pretty laughing and squirming.

And let’s be real- if Suguru did mind, he didn’t say anything.

But it’s just something that has this weird twist on him, a branch of foreplay that keeps him in an act of dominance that may not have even needed to be there.

Like now.

The feeling of you writhing on top of him has his head spinning wildly, hips moving and shifting and lips battling has him in his own paradise he could happily get lost in.

Lips battle for dominance, tongues lacing to tease and teeth clacking against one another for feral carnality and lust. It's a miracle he's able to hold his own, you're a goddess incarnate, especially now as you're draped on top of him, tits bouncing with each slurp against each other filthily.

“I fucking love you,” he murmurs, teeth sinking into your lip.

When a massive paw clamps down on your ass to make you moan, blunt nails gripping the plush of flesh in his hands, Satoru is thrown off when you let out a breathy laugh.

Quiet, and easy. But still, a laugh.

He pulls back in confusion.

Your eyes are blown with pleasure and your lips are glossy with spit, but the way your body is tense tells him everything he needs to know about your little reaction.

"What's wrong?" You pant.

"There's no way."

"No way what?" You're a pretty liar, he'll give you credit there.

"There's no fucking way," he sneers, sinking his teeth into his own lip as his blue eyes look you up and down. His fingers briefly tickle you again, and you whine and giggle a hiss out.

"Don't-"

"Is this pretty little ass ticklish too, babygirl?”

"It’s not!" You say petulantly.

"You're not really in a position to lie to me, are ya?" He teases, letting his fingers slowly start their rhythmic tickling once again, and you let out a string of giggles despite yourself, whatever you could try to conjure into a lie being outed as such.

“Satoru!” You squeal, head bumping against him as a way to make him stop. Your nerves are electric with each scritch of his fingers along your sensitive ass and back, fingers fisting locks of his fluffy hair to ground yourself from the electric feeling. "Stohohop it!"

"Liar's get tickled, babe. You know the rules."

“Toru-!” You whine, shoving his chest while his fingers continue to skitter over your lower back and thighs. “I can’t- ha!”

“Need you to use your words, babygirl,” he chuckles, landing a loud spank to your ass. That, immediately, has you replacing your giggles with moans to sing in the air, but the moment is cut off when he just tickles you some more.

"Th-This-This isn't sexyyyyyy!" You groan around laughter.

"I have no clue what you're talking about, this is fuckin' hot."

With your gyrating hips over his, you’re met with his own anatomy reacting to you, stiff and firm under your writhing victimization. His eyes are blown with pleasure, hazy and leaving all coordination to his fingers. His teeth sinks into his lip.

Fuck, he's so turned on it's painful.

“A-ahHA-Re you fuhuhucking ha-AH-ard?!”

“I’m not not hard,” he snicker. He leans down to sink his teeth into the juncture of your throat, making you whine. “Fuck, baby.”

“I chahahant come like thIHIHIS!”

“You’re a fat liar.” Once again, the hands stop tickling you, and one of them darts straight between your legs to stroke the new, surprising wet spot on your panties. You mewl happily as the sensation, and he smirks, “you like this too, don’t you?”

You can’t say anything, he starts tickling you again, this time moving up to your sides and stomach and making you whine and cackle loudly, but one hand stays buried between your thighs, slipping past your underwear and slipping two fingers inside of your velveteen walls through the soaked lace. Your arousal is shrouded in laughter and whines, seeping through your panties and staining the fabric of his pants. “Holy fuck.”

“Satoruuu!” You whine.

Your hips, in search of something to feed the throbbing between your hips, grates against his, the zipper of his pants slotting almost too perfectly between your legs to nip at your clit, and you whimper in delight as you’re finally getting the relief you need in addition to the feeling you’re getting with this…. Sensation.

“Gonna cum-“

“Told you.”

“Dont w-HAHA-hahahanna!” You plead. “Not like this!”

He smirks and sinks his teeth into the meat of your bouncing breast, another sing of pleasure passing your lips.

“I don’t think you have a say in it, doll.

“Gonna make you love cumming like this.”

#my number one kink and boy ndbjbbjda #love him so muchhhhh #hot honey//tickling #gojo satoru #gojo satoru smut #gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru x reader smut #gojo satoru imagine #gojo satoru jjk #gojo #gojo smut #gojo x reader #gojo x reader smut #gojo imagine #gojo jjk #jjk #jjk smut #jjk imagine #jjk x reader #jjk x reader smut #18+ content #minors dni #smut #not safe for minors

[genshin-obsessed]

Could I request Neuvilette and his s/o playing with cats?

「✧」 the second I saw this request, i knew exactly what I was gonna have in it lmao and that's rare nowadays i hope you like it <;333

Adorable

"Aren't you the cutest little baby? Yes, you are! Yes, you are! Oh, look at your fuzzy little baby face, I just wanna squish it, and smooch it, and give you all the scritches in the world-"

"I really don't think the cat can you understand you, my love." Neuvillette said as he stood to the side, watching you fawn over the new kitten you'd just adopted.

"But look at her face, Neuvie! It's just the most adorable thing in the world!" You squealed as you held out the little kitten to him. Neuvillette stood there for a moment, before relenting and walking over, crouching down beside you. You pushed the kitten towards his face, watching as his cyan eyes fell upon the fuzzball.

"Well, I wouldn't say the most adorable thing in the world, but she's definitely a close second." He said as his gloved hand reached out to gently pet the kitten, that just let out a small meow. You quickly handed over the kitten, watching as Neuvillette panicked for a moment before gingerly taking the animal in his large hands.

"Well, I simply disagree." You said as you looked down, petting the top of the kitten's head with your finger. Neuvillette's eyes landed on your face and softened as he smiled a little. Of course, you would disagree. You didn't understand just how adorable you were in his eyes.

"I see why you're a lover of cats. They're cute and... calming." He said as he continued to pet the small kitten. It wasn't long before a couple other joined, meowing and pawing at you two for some attention as well. "Oh, they come in groups-" Neuvillette was interrupted as he fell from his crouched position as one of your larger cats jumped on him. He was careful to protect the small kitten before laughing a little.

"Are you ok?" You giggled as you helped him up a little, watching as he happily obliged to the other cat. "You're a magnet!"

"Well, I suppose I do have some time to spare." And that short break he had from work quickly turned into two hours of playing with the cats.

#genshin impact x reader #genshin x reader #genshin neuvillette #neuvillette x reader #genshin impact x gender neutral reader #🖊─ pocky’s writings

[charliemwrites]

1fur1 Price part 2

(Sorry if this isn’t, like, spectacular. It’s been a minute since I wrote for this au)

The house is getting an upgrade. Two wolf dogs was a cozy situation, but manageable. The addition of a third, especially one as big as Konig, was pushing it. Like, really pushing it.

Now that Skipper has adopted himself into the family…

Not that you mind, of course. Skipper has been a bit of a blessing in furry disguise. You know that “Alpha Dog” dynamics aren’t an actual Thing with wolves, but if they were, you think Skipper would be it.

He must have some sort of shepherd in his blood because he wrangles the rest of the boys masterfully. They spend too long in the yard, he’s barking and nipping and rounding them up. Johnny’s being too insistent about “sharing” your food, he’s inserting himself between you two. Ghost and Johnny get rambunctious, he’ll tolerate it for a couple minutes but then he’s breaking it up with a grumble — especially if they’re acting up inside.

You appreciate the help.

It’s not that the boys don’t listen to you. They do! With almost perfect obedience. But it can still be overwhelming to keep an eye on everyone all the time.

“Oh darling, why is it always you?” you sigh, scratching at Konig’s chin. Receive a whine in return.

Your poor sensitive guy. Stepped on a bee in the yard, it seems. The vet cooed over him, gave him some meds, and now he’s all but collapsed in an anxiety-exhausted heap by the fireplace.

Johnny is pacing behind you, making upset noises and nosing at your elbow.

“I know you’re worried, bud,” you soothe over your shoulder. “He’s alright.”

You’re working a sock over Konig’s bandages so that he doesn’t pick at them. Johnny takes that as an invitation to insert himself into the mix, bumping into your shoulder hard. Your hand pushes into konig’s paw as you catch your balance and he yelps. The noise surprises you, scares you, hands jerking back.

Skipper is on him in an instant, teeth on his scruff and yanking him away from you and Konig. For once, Johnny resists, yelping and whining crying.

“Jesus, enough!” You raise your voice a bit to be heard over all the canine yelling. Get a hand in Skipper’s scruff and give him a shake. “Release.”

He does, though not without an indignant growl, twisting around to glare at you. You didn’t even know dogs could glare with so much indignation.

“What are you gonna do, bite me?” you challenge, hand still buried in his fur. “Grow up.”

You turn to Johnny, who’s making a great show of looking pathetic, tail down and ears back.

“Got to bed,” you instruct, pointing with your other hand to the cushion Ghost is on. Those two are thick as thieves, you’re sure Johnny will feel better after some cuddles. Sure enough, Johnny drags his feet over to ghost, who grumbles as he makes room for the other dog.

You let Skipper go, who makes a big scene of shaking off. But he doesn’t go making trouble with Johnny, so you let him be. Which leaves Konig, who isn’t making eye contact with anyone.

“You alright, baby boy?” you croon. He licks your offered hand.

You manage to finish getting the sock on in peace, dropping a kiss to the scar on his forehead.

“My little trooper, good boy,” you murmur.

With him settled, you sit back with a sigh. Skipper is sitting, looking mighty offended. You groan.

“I’m sorry, honey,” you offer, extending a hand to him. “I was just stressed and all that fussing freaked me out. I know you were just trying to help.”

A long, long look at your palm. And then he sighs and sets his chin in your hand. You waste no time scritching along his jaw, coaxing him closer until you can leave kisses all over his muzzle and forehead.

“Big strong boy,” you coo, grinning into his ears when you see his tail sweeping slowly back and forth. Like he doesn’t want you to notice. “Such a good helper. Thank you, handsome.”

Peace restored, you settle onto the couch until dinner time.

So yes, four wolf-hybrids is pushing it on space.

—

You’re being minded.

It would be funnier if your dog wasn’t better at taking care of you than you are.

“You must have been in service dog training or something,” you muse, accepting the pill bottle from Skipper’s mouth. “Someone wanted you to work.”

And work he does.

If it’s not helping you keep the boys in line, it’s patrolling the yard with Ghost. Or nudging you to eat at mealtimes. Or putting you to bed. Hes a busy boy, hardly ever settles on the couch with the rest at night for snuggle time.

And when you do strong arm him into it, his ears are perked at every little noise, ready to protect.

There’s also this. The bringing you meds. (You try not to think about how he managed to get into the cabinet. Maybe you left them out on the counter?) Or sometimes he picks up things you’ve dropped, like pens or keys or even your phone.

It’s sweet, but you worry he’s bored. When you do buy him enrichment toys though, he gives them a perfunctory sniff, then leaves them for one of the others. (Johnny in particular loves the treat puzzles.) So you figure he’s stimulated enough, considering bored dogs usually tear into anything and everything.

“You know I’m supposed to take care of you right?” You tease, patting his big, sturdy side. “I take care of everyone here. You’re my boys.”

Skipper snorts and sits down, watching you, eyes pinging between your face and the pills. You huff, amused despite yourself.

“Alright, alright! Rude mutt.”

A little “boof” — agreement or offense? You amuse yourself with anthropomorphizing his noises while you chug water with your meds.

“See? Done. Ta-da!” You say when they’re done.

Another “boof” and then he’s trotting off. Pauses to give you a significant look. You check the time. Right, it’s lunchtime. Best to take meds with food anyway.

“I’m coming,” you groan, shuffling after him.

All the dogs are waiting for you in the kitchen, big eyes and perked ears.

“Look at you lot,” you laugh, dropping a scratch to Ghost’s head as you pass. “What is this, an intervention. I’m not giving you guys enough peanut butter?”

Skipper ignores you, taking his usual place at the entrance to the kitchen. A good vantage point to keep an eye on you and the rest of the house. He only accepts a little bit of shared food after everyone else gets a bite. You hum as you consider all of them, crammed into your kitchen because they’re a clingy lot.

“Might be time for a move, guys,” you sigh. “Or maybe another story.”

You glance at the ceiling with dread. Either way, you’re not looking forward to it.

#cod #my writing #fanfiction #reader fic #woof woof au #1fur1 #john price #Simon Riley #johnny mactavish #konig

[soft-mafia]

Buggy Headcanons (NSFW + SFW)

warnings: mentions of female reader, the NSFW isn’t separated from the SFW it’s kind of mixed in

a/n: I wanted to do some more Buggy headcanons to get my creative juices flowing loool

• The man stress eats(and drinks), when he’s frustrated over another encounter with straw hat, or a failed treasure hunt, he’ll sit on his throne or in his quarters and shovel food into his mouth. Whenever you’re sitting on his lap he can accidentally get a whole lot of crumbs on you.

• He’ll have days when all he wants to do is fuck. He’ll have sex with you for hours, until the room smelled like sweat and raw sex. His hairy torso pressed up against your back while he’s holding you down, grunting like a bull as he cums in you for what feels like the millionth time. Of course he takes breaks after every round, giving himself a breather while he either holds you close to him, or plays with your sopping pussy.

• The most annoying thing about sleeping with him at night is when he’s spooning you, he sometimes snores right into your ear. And it’s loud, especially when he gets choked on his own mucus and goes into a loud coughing fit.

• As soon as he gets into his quarters after a long day of pillaging and pirating— his clothes as off. As soon as that door closes he’s already in his underwear flopped onto the bed.

• He always makes sure that you’re eating. Even when you’re full or not hungry he’ll shove some food into your mouth or hand feed you a fruit or something. And he’d always do it at the worst times too, whenever you’re talking to one of his pirates about something, or if you’re talking to him, he’ll his hold a piece of food up to your mouth like you’re an animal(or his floating hand will just show up beside you) and he’ll expect you to take it, and if you don’t he’ll just shove it into your face again.

• Buggy loves grabbing your ass, especially when you least expect it, he’ll pull you into a firm embrace, and when you think he’s just being all lovey dovey— your eyes go wide when you feel his strong hands gripping your ass, your face going red as you feel his deep laughter rumble in his chest.

• He goes crazy over chin scratches, will literally go loopy when you scritch him.

• It’s hard getting all of his thick cock to properly fit into your mouth in one go, so he takes his time easing your lips around him. His muscled thighs twitching in his pants, grunts escaping him as he guides you through it. “Yeah.. that’s it, all the way down that pretty throat.” He chuckles gravely behind grit teeth, “You’d think you’d get used to it by now!” He laughs. Gently holding your head while watching your cheeks puff out with his cock is one of his favorite things about blowjobs.

• Gets jealous and protective whenever he’s around someone he sees as a threat to your relationship. It’s kind of a similar situation to his nose, where he’s so insecure he thinks everybody is out to steal you from him. You’re with him while he’s talking to somebody he sees as stronger and more attractive than he is(impossible), they’re speaking to him about something but he’s not listening to because he’s thinking about them stealing you and you running off with them. Buggy growls and randomly blurts out, “HANDS OFF MY GIRL, SHE’S MINE!” Which leads you, and the person in question confused.

• There was an incident where Mr. 3 sarcastically asked Buggy if he had to choose between Y/n and the one piece, Buggy just stood there with his mouth open, looking between you and 3, genuinely torn between the two options. You were rightfully pissed and didn’t speak to him for the rest of the day. While you were giving him the silent treatment, he was an emotional rollercoaster, going from whining, to straight up shouting at you. “Come on baby it was hypotheticalllll!!” “STOP BEING DRAMATIC!!” “At least look at me when I’m talking to you!!!” “LOOK AT ME Y/N!!!”

• Sometimes he does things to try and get you to laugh, and every time he does something that unintentionally makes a fool out of himself, and usually it always gets you to break and burst out into laughter.

• Buggy is by no means a 5 star chef but one time he tried to do something nice and surprise you with breakfast in bed. The typical bacon and egg smiley face breakfast. It was so adorable that you didn’t even complain about the burnt to a crisp, tasteless bacon.

• He lets you deal with his hair because it’s too much of a hassle for him, you have the honor of washing it, deep conditioning it, brushing all of the knots out of his hair(with the plus of him shouting and complaining at you during the entire process), and styling it into his hat.

• Buggy loves neck kisses, as if his neck isn’t just begging to be kissed. He’s a sucker for when you hold his jaw and lean in, then gently brush your lips over his thick, muscled neck before pressing a soft kiss to it, it makes him shiver and blush every time.

• You’re the only one who he has ever let touch his nose It’s a privilege you get from being his. He obviously doesn’t like it, and he never lets it go as far as a typical kiss or nose boop, he’ll turn away to grumble and frown about it, but it always leaves him flustered every time. It gets him to shut up as well, it’s like an off button, if you’re having a heated discussion with him and you know you’re right— just boop the snoot and he backs down.

#one piece #one piece buggy #buggy one piece #buggy the clown #buggy x reader #buggy the clown x reader #buggy x y/n #buggy x you #buggy headcanons #buggy imagines #one piece headcanons #one piece imagines #opla #one piece live action #one piece smut

[blindmagdalena]

Resignation

Summary: 18+ 1.5k homelander x reader, established relationship, dirty talk, thigh riding, grinding.

After you have a particularly rough day at work, Homelander offers you some sound career advice, and a little stress relief.

spiritual successor to Customer Service, but stands alone. this is for everyone who's sick of this capitalist hellscape, and the crummy jobs we're forced to work to survive. not proofread, we die like men. 🖤

Another day, another dollar, another near meltdown.

You spend most of your commute home trying to pull yourself together. After the day you’ve had at work, the last thing you need to do is burst into tears before you even made it home. It’s taking everything in you to keep it at bay.

There’s just something about you that apparently screams Hey! Abuse me! in the workplace.

At least you’ve got something to look forward to when you get home.

Or rather, someone.

“I’m home,” you announce tiredly, stepping inside. You kick your shoes off, and despite your mood, you smile at the pair of tall red boots that sit next to them. It took some convincing to get him to take them off consistently, but ever since he’s started spending more and more time hiding out at your place, you’ve insisted on some ground rules

“Living room,” Homelander calls back.

Walking in, you find him crouched in the living room, staring at your cat with a level of intensity you’re not sure what to make of. “Uh, something going on here?”

“Yep,” he answers evenly. “Asserting dominance.”

You watch your cat blink slowly before lazily rising, stretching into a wide yawn, and hopping down to greet you. Homelander stands, scoffing triumphantly. “I won.”

“Uh-huh,” you give back distractedly, bending down to scritch your cat's ears.

“Hey, what’s up?” He asks, frowning as he approaches. “Your eyes are all red.”

“Hard day,” you tell him, readily accepting his encroaching embrace. You sink easily into his arms, noting that his gloves are off today. That’s new. You slip your arms around his neck, your body tired and heavy as you trust him with the full weight of it. He holds you up effortlessly.

He exhales a huff of hot air right by your ear that gives you goosebumps. “Quit,” he says, his voice set low.

“That’s what you always say.” “Because I mean it,” he shoots back fiercely, pulling away to meet your gaze. “Quit. Fuck those assholes already. You don’t need them. You have me,” he says, reiterating a conversation the two of you have had at least a dozen times now.

Money is nothing to him. He could buy you out for three times your salary for the rest of your life with his pocket change.

“I can’t just not work,” you say, pulling your hands down from his neck to lay flush on his chest. “I need my job.”

“The only thing you need is me,” he stresses again, kissing you. He always feels like he’s restraining himself when he touches you, holding himself back from moving too hard, too fast, from devouring. It’s thrilling to lose yourself in. “Why do you insist on tormenting yourself?

Stomach fluttering, you can’t help but laugh at the slight petulance that slips into his voice. “Because if I give up and let you take care of me, you might get bored, and then I’ll have nothing,” you say, and though you mean to make a joke of it, to fill your voice with playful whimsy, the confession lands harder than you expected it to. You’re tired, you’re stretched thin, and as your own words sink in, you realize just how bad it’s gotten.

Homelander withdraws, leveling you with a look that confirms it: that wasn’t a joke, and neither of you are amused.

You blink several times, suddenly speechless. “I…” You realize your eyes are burning again, and with every blink, your vision gets more bleary. “I just meant…”

“Do you really believe that?” He asks, his brows pinched.

“No,” you answer reflexively, voice too sharp even to your ears. “No, not that… I don’t know, I was trying to make a joke, but maybe… I don’t know. I get scared sometimes,” you say carefully, trying desperately not to spill the tears gathering in your eyes. “That someday I’m not going to be enough because y–”

His lips meet yours before you can continue, muffling the rest of your sentence. His hands are impossibly warm as they sweep up your back, eventually cupping either side of your neck. He kisses you like he’s starving, like he needs the taste of you to breathe, like he would die without you. He kisses you until your brain feels foggy and there’s a dull throb between your legs.

“You’re ridiculous,” he all but growls against your lips, thumbs stroking your cheeks. “I’m not going to get bored. Good fucking luck getting out of this one,” he says, slipping a hand to the back of your neck and squeezing for emphasis. You shiver, your tears lost in the wake of the slow rolling heat moving through your body. “Besides, you know damn well you’re the one who’ll be taking care of me.”

You can feel his smirk against your lips, and you laugh unexpectedly, the sound of it bordering on the sob you had very nearly fallen to. “You need a babysitter now?”

“Why, are we roleplaying? That’s pretty naughty,” he purrs.

“Stop it,” you laugh, pushing his face away, but he doesn’t relent. 

“What? Sexy babysitter could be fun,” he says, kissing a trail up your neck.

“Pervert,” you accuse, turning your face to kiss him. He accepts greedily, tongue slipping between your lips. You sigh a soft moan into his mouth, which only encourages his hands to wander even more, eventually settling on your ass. Without warning, he grabs tight and hauls you up, hitching your legs around his waist, swallowing up the startled gasp you give.

He settles down onto the couch, and maneuvers you until you’re straddling his thigh. You can feel the magnitude of his strength thrumming between your legs, pressed up tight against that same throbbing heat he ignited in you with those fervent kisses.

Cupping your face, he pulls you down for more of the same.

“Go ahead,” he says against your lips, his own curved into a gloating smile. “Grind. I can smell how bad you want it.” His voice is low, as coarse and sweet as raw sugar. His words hit you like a punch to the gut, worsening the pulse of your need.

Immediately, you start to rock your hips, grinding down against him. He rewards you with a hand on your thigh, squeezing as it slides slowly higher, his thumb skirting along your inner thigh. “No more stress,” he murmurs, the words warm on your lips. “No more tears. Just you… with me… mine.”

The way he rumbles that word against your ear sends a shiver trilling up and down your spine, the heat at the center of you spiraling up, up, up, blossoming throughout your entire body. He flexes his thigh and gives you one sharp little bounce on it, wringing a moan out of you. You roll your hips faster, tightly clenching your thighs on either side of his. You push both hands up into his hair and hold on tight, panting into the crook of his neck.

Homelander slips both hands back to your ass, gives a generous squeeze while he helps your body move, rolling it in time with the way he flexes and occasionally bucks his thigh against you. “Say it. Say you’ll quit, and you’ll be all mine,” he demands softly, grip flexing on you. There’s a neediness at the edges of his voice. “Give me that. Give me you.”

You screw your eyes shut, keening breathlessly. The grind of fabric against sensitive skin is almost too much, too dry, but it’s fucking good, too. You’re getting wetter and wetter, losing yourself to the relentless pace he sets for you, and the hungry way he kisses at your throat. 

“C’mon. Give it up. Give me everything. M’never letting you go,” he pants, at which point you realize he’s also grinding against your leg. The arousal–the sheer animalistic need–in his voice makes your stomach flip, and with one last shuddering noise, you’re coming against his leg, moaning loud in his ear as the wave of pleasure slowly wrings out every last bit of tension that you had been holding onto.

You collapse against him, your arms hanging limply around his neck. He nuzzles at your jaw, kissing a trail to your lips. You reciprocate lazily, your eyes closed as you luxuriate in the aftershocks of the unexpected release.

“Quit,” he whispers persistently, lips pressed to the corner of your mouth. “We’ll take care of each other.”

“This is playing dirty,” you slur, feeling stupefied in your post-orgasm haze.

“Oh, I’m just getting started,” he says, taking your hand from around his neck, and slipping it between his legs. You bite your tongue. Christ, he runs fucking hot. Even through the fabric of his suit, you can feel the throb of his cock. “You’re gonna be writing your resignation letter in my cum by the end of the night.”

You make a sound somewhere between a laugh and an unsteady moan, clenching against his thigh. “Okay,” you say, lifting your head to kiss him. “Prove it.”

Much to Homelander’s delight, you submit your notice of resignation the very next day.

#i banged this out rly fast bc i notice lotta folks struggling at work lately and i just wanted to offer some support ;; #homelander x reader #homelander x you #homelander fanfiction #my writing #smut

[sweaterrat]

Rottmnt Affection Headcanons :]

————————————————————————

DONNIE

- Donnie’s affection, like most things, is mostly led with his head.

- He like usually rests his head on his partners shoulder when he’s tired

- He enjoys getting his head pat and occasionally his shell if he’s comfy enough

- When things are fluffy and wholesome, he’ll rest his forehead against his partners (you see this a lot in Portals teehee)

- He especially enjoys nuzzling into necks or other warm places. He loves when his face is cupped too.

- Donnie likes kisses more than he’d ever admit

- He also really really really loves being called pretty or beautiful (pretty boy especially)! It makes him feel pretty (bc he is 💛)

LEO

- Leo’s love is mostly led with his hands!

- Leo likes touching things ofc

- During cuddle time, he loves rubbing his partners back and resting his chin on their head

- Leo loves being close to people. He enjoys the quality time.

- He’s easy to fall asleep (while still being a pretty light sleeper) and he always likes waking up and seeing his partner’s face.

- Leo likes squishing his partners cheeks with his hands.

- He also usually bops them in the face (affectionately ofc)

- What can he say? It’s in his nature!

RAPH

- Raph is a hugger. Ofc he is.

- He is, however, a little afraid of crushing his lover.

- He enjoys hugging his partner for hours on end.

- He loves being scritched especially under the chin! His tail will start wagging and everything it’s so cute!!!

- Speaking of his tail, when he's hugging his partner, he’ll wrap them up with his tail. It’s mostly involuntary, he swears!

- He’s also a bit of a biter. This is involuntary

- It’s like his cuteness aggression. If his partner is too damn adorable, he’ll need to bite something.

- When he bites his partner, it’s obviously always gentle. He worries if he’s hurt them anyway.

- He’s honestly just a sweetheart and a gentle giant! He’d never do anything to hurt the one he loves 💛

MIKEY

- HUGS FROM BEHIND>>>>>

- I cannot stress this enough how much Mikey loves these

- Mikey is obviously the most affectionate out of the others

- He LOVES kisses

- Absolutely adores them

- He will shower his partner in love and affection

- Sure, he loves going all out for the love of his life, but he mostly enjoys the little things. Those tiny intimate moments

- Those soft moments are his favorite. He loves having someone to feel safe around.

- Laying on his partner's stomach is one of his favorite things to do! 💛

- He loves holding hands while cuddling too!

- He gets all flustered when you compliment him! He’s usually the one to give compliments, so it's a nice surprise when he’s appreciated :]

————————————————————————

I did this for funsies lmao sorry if this is awful 😭💛

#rottmnt #rottmnt donnie #rottmnt leo #rottmnt raph #rottmnt mikey #rottmnt x reader #this is all canon in portals teehee #rottmnt donnie x reader #rottmnt leo x reader #rottmnt mikey x reader #rottmnt raph x reader

[st-danger]

What about the ghouls' horns being an erogenous zone for the ghouls and one of the Papas not realising while giving them horn scritches?

Terzo and Copia? Both touchy in their own ways. But while Terzo was intentional, every brush of fingers a loaded gun, a promise, Copia is...not so aware.

Aether is, perhaps, a little nasty for taking advantage of that. For getting a little something out of Copia that he doesn't know he's giving. Perverted. Just a little headache, he'd told him when Copia had found him resting his head in his hands. Paracetamol and other drug store sundries never work well for ghouls, even when they're taking a more human form, and certainly the effort of holding a glamour up when aching does nothing to help. So when Copia offers Aether his bed, offers to let him rest in his lap so he can rub his temples, of course he's quick to say yes.

He's a little wrong for asking Copia to remove his gloves. And he's nasty for not stopping him when absently, his fingers stroke away from his temple to rub at the base of a horn. The shock of pleasure is instant, sharp and intense and- he gasps, stomach clenching and Copia immediately withdraws.

"Oh. Is it very painful there?"

Aether sucks in a breath, and feels momentarily guilty. This behavior, he could expect it from someone like Omega. Dew, maybe. Ifrit for sure.

"It's sore," Aether mumbles, lying through his pointed teeth. Even just that little touch makes his tail go stiff. And he's about to use him to get stiff in other places, too. Oh, he shouldn't. He really shouldn't. Bad. Wrong. Dirty. And yet... "Would probably helped if you rubbed there for a little bit."

"Certainly," Copia says, and begins a gentle caress. "As long as you'd like."

Aether shuts his eyes tight, and bites his tongue at the sensation, frissions of pleasure sparking down his spine to somewhere lower. More private.

"And how is that?"

Aether curls up, draws the knee of his outside leg up just enough to provide a little coverage of his lap. Afford him a little privacy because this is going to get him hard in no time at all, and he ought to be truly ashamed.

"S'good," he says. Feeling Copia's bare hand there, when usually there is leather in the way feels even more perverse. His fingertips trace the seam where his horn meets his head and his cock begins to tingle. True to his word, he just...rubs. Touches. Hums contentedly while he thinks he's helping Aether handle the worst of his headache, wickedly unaware that he's doing more to help get his short, thick cock all red and heavy than he is the headache.

He tries very hard to keep his breath steady. To hold the whines and the low moan that threatens to bubble up safe within. He should stop Copia. But then what? Stand up and try to leave the room with his back turned so Copia doesn't see his cock pressed against his pants, tenting?

"Do your horns ever hurt?" Copia asks, and the question pulls him out of his thoughts in an instant. "I've had toothaches. Is it like that?"

"I don't know," Aether says, "I've never had one."

"Well I suppose it isn't the tooth itself that hurts, is it?" Copia muses. "It's the nerves inside, really." Oh, he does not want to listen to Copia discuss teeth. "Do your horns have nerves inside?"

They do. He doesn't need to know how many, though.

"Could you try rubbing those too? Might help. Maybe." Like he doesn't know. Like he isn't aware of the effect it has, like he's never asked Dew to stroke them while he masturbates to send him hurtling over the edge.

Slow, careful fingers start to slide up and down one, and then the other, and he feels himself grow hot and fat in his pants.

"How is that?"

"Would it- I'm a little cold," Aether lies. "Would you hand me a blanket?"

"Oh, certainly," Copia says with zero hesitation, leaning away for a moment to snatch a throw, and peel it open from how it's been folded. Draping it over Aether. Covering. Privacy. Brings it up to his neck.

He tries to make it look like a casual adjustment in position, snuggling under and crossing his hands over his chest. He has to fight to hold the moan when Copia's hands return to his head, only this time, it's both hands, one on each horn.

He uses his thumbs to brush over his nipples, feel them peaked through his shirt. Brushing back and forth and getting them good and stiff. Copia can't see under the blanket. He can pleasure himself here and he won't be any the wiser.

His face his hot.

Nasty, he thinks. So bad. But he wants to be touched and made to feel good and-

"Okay?" Copia asks.

"Maybe a little faster?" Aether asks in a small voice. The guilt leaking through. Copia doesn't notice.

"Of course, my ghoul," he says.

Aether gives his nipples a surreptitious little tweak.

"Just relax, eh? No need to be so tense. Relax for your Papa."

"Okay," he manages.

He forces himself to draw a deep breath.

Under the blanket, his dick throbs.

"Once we get this sorted, I'll rub you there, too." Copia hums. Knowing. He sounds amused.

Aether whimpers, ashamed, face hot.

#st-speaks #ghost #the band ghost #ghost fic #ghost fanfiction #ghost headcanons #aether ghoul #nameless ghouls #cardinal copia #papa emeritus iv #papa emeritus #copia/aether #copia x aether #papa/aether #papa x aether #copia

[dinogoofy]

Sunshine

Did Reptile's new trailer bring me out of a year long hiatus?

.....noooooooo

Also, fun fact! Reptile was my very first profile picture (I think?)! I think it's time I changed it >:]

Pairing: Syzoth (Reptile) x reader

Warnings: none? Unless you're uncomfortable with Reptile being a shifter

Word count: 354

---

It was a rather sleepy afternoon. The sun was out, the sky was blue, and the shade from Outworld's trees fell perfectly upon the two of you. Syzoth in his full, scaley form is enjoying the last of summer's warmth. His head is laid in your lap, body stretched out as he soaks up the sun while lying on his belly. You stroke his scales, scratching at hard to reach spots as well, earning a deep hum from the reptile in your lap. 

It's certainly a serene, quiet scene, and soon enough, even you start to fall asleep. A sudden snort startles you awake. Syzoth has an eye cracked open at you. He huffs, pouty that you had stopped spoiling him. You roll your eyes. Syzoth rolls over onto his back, and you take the chance to grab him by the snout and tease him a bit.

"I think you're starting to get spoiled. I cant keep giving you scritches forever, you know" You laugh. His expression turns amused as he playfully nips at your fingertips so that you let him go. You do so, and he's already shifted, reaching for your hands again and placing them in his hair. 

"Well, if you'd rather, I'll let you play with my hair instead." He smirks, letting go of your hands. "- although I wouldn't mind if you'd rather use your hands for… other things.

You roll your eyes again, giggling. "Pfft- just get off me!" You playfully shove him off your lap, and he's disappeared immediately.

"-And deprive myself of my favorite heater? No way." You keep your guard up, waiting. And then suddenly he's behind you. He pulls you into his clothed chest and laughs with you as he tugs you backwards. You turn to kiss him, and he tugs you even closer. You curl into each other, and when you separate, you ignore his complaints by tucking your face into the crook of his shoulder and sliding your hand into his hair, the gentle motions pleasing him. The two of you fall asleep right there, and don't wake up till late in the day.

#mortal kombat #mortal kombat 1 #mk1 #mortal kombat x reader #mk1 reptile #mk reptile #reptile x reader #syzoth x reader #mk

[semisolidmind]

i know it's all about the lion's den AU rn and as usual I am FEASTING on the content (excuse the crumbs) but there's an idea that won't leave me alone-

what if Peaches was not human, but an immortal from the beginning? How much would change? I know the whole appeal of these AUs - I mean, that's why I love them and I absolutely love this lil corner of the fandom. but I've been kinda diving into the whole immortality biz in Chinese myths for my oc, so now I'm curious.

Peaches could be someone cultivating and practicing Xian (i hope I'm using that right) for years, or consumed pills/elixir of immortality somehow, or a demon who is oddly very kind and empathetic - would the bois still love her just as much? How different is the dynamic now even if Peaches retains her core personality traits?

love your work! and hydrate before ya diedrate

ive been thinking about this, and i kinda like the idea of immortal reader being an attendant of the heavenly peach orchard.

not super high up the ladder, but not at the bottom either. her powers are limited to helping plants grow just a little bit, creating temporary barriers, and being able to float the way all celestials can. the higher-ups figure that since no one is bold or stupid enough to steal from heaven, they don’t need any extra security in the immortal peach groves.

you can take a guess as to how reader meets the monkeys.

they show up to the orchards, ready to fight their way to the peaches, but instead of some overpowered celestial soldiers guarding the orchard, it's....one immortal maiden. just the one. but she doesn't seem all that powerful, soooooo...

...maybe she'd agree to let them take a few without too much trouble?

the monkey bros go the "oh don't mind us we're just a couple of cute lil monkeys, here to cause adorable and harmless mischief" route in their approach to getting reader to let her gaurd down.

they approach her while she takes a break from pruning some dead branches. she's understandably surprised and suspicious about these two seemingly normal monkeys who've snuck in, but... they are pretty cute. and tame; they let her pet them and give them scritches. perhaps they're one of the heavenly official's pets. reader supposes that they can stay for a while.

wukong and macaque play their parts, get reader's guard down, and steal a couple dozen peaches each. reader notices, but there's not much she can do beyond shooing the monkeys out with a broom (and her soft heart barely allows her to do that). she knows that if she reports it, those cute lil monkeys will be hunted down and killed.

she supposes she could put in a request for higher walls around the grove, or more barriers (she still wonders how the boys managed to get through the first ones), but with how slowly things get done in the bureaucracy...it'd be a very, very long time until it was even brought up in court.

besides, even then....they're monkeys. animals. she won't place blame on them for being what they are. those little cuties probably had no idea that the immortal peaches were any different from the ones on earth.

she could never stay mad at their adorable lil faces anyways.

---

reader, despite what you might think, has a pretty laid back job. once all her chores for the day have been completed (those magic trees don't really need much beyond the essentials to do their thing), she has a good amount of free time to sit and, you guessed it—read.

macaque (because of course, he has to be the first one to fall in every au) decides, on a bored whim, to go visit that nice attendant they stole from not too long ago. perhaps he'll collect some intel while he's up there.

he finds her after a bit of searching. reader sits in a secluded corner of the grove, leisurely turning pages and enjoying the shade. macaque, still disguised, sidles up to her. reader notices, seeming surprised to see him before her face morphs into... a rather adorable pout. perhaps she thinks she's being intimidating.

'damn, no wonder the bureaucracy didn't think they needed any more security,' macaque thinks sarcastically. such a fearsome maiden they've chosen to guard the immortal peaches.

while reader takes a minute to admonish him about stealing, it isn't long before she sighs and gives up on her lecture in favor of scratching him gently behind his ears. he churrs low in his chest. her whole demeanor is as soft and sweet as the peaches she guards (her hands as well, he notes, pressing into them).

macaque laughs internally. a fearsome maiden, indeed.

macaque manages to wiggle his way into reader's lap, pulling her attention from her book. she knows she should be trying to scare him off, but...just—just look at him! he's so cute, and she's too pulled in by how cute he is to notice the oddly powerful aura he seems to exude (far too powerful to be a normal monkey). he enjoys her touch for a while longer before he hears the far-off call of his annoying brother, wondering where he is. he bumps his head into reader's hand by way of goodbye before running off to shadow away more secretively.

reader watches him go, sighing. she really should shoo him away next time.

---

macaque keeps coming back. and reader continues to be unable to kick him out.

with very few visitors and no one else to talk to, reader begins to tell him everything that she overhears during the day; the officials don't think anyone is listening when they air out their gossip as they walk by the orchard. she doesn’t know it, but she’s saving macaque the energy of using his powers to gather this intel on his own.

the six-eared demon makes a habit of showing up to the grove to laze around with his favorite maiden and listen to her read, using “spying” as the excuse he gives his brother for why he's been running off so often. reader seems to have accepted that he won't be leaving her alone any time soon, and he takes full advantage. macaque comes to think of reader and the secluded corner of the grove as his own little peice of heaven.

of course, sooner or later, wukong joins in. he's a bit angry that macaque didn't just say he was visiting the peach orchard and it's attendant; he wouldn't have minded, he would've come with! macaque doesn't bother trying to explain that he didn't want to share.

but share he does, seeing as wukong greedily takes all the attention from reader he can get. the monkey king finds himself enamored with the maiden who's hands and heart are as soft as the fruits she tends to. he won't admit it (it may hurt his carefully crafted "ruthless demon king" image if he did), but wukong is a cuddle bug when it comes to reader. everything about her is just so soft, and she's so kind, and she always smells like peaches—he could spend hours laying on her chest as she reads.

he just feels so...peaceful, with her.

the boys are entangled in reader's life, visiting whenever they can and butting into whatever she happens to be doing. they see her day to day happiness (brief conversations with the lower maids she's friends with), and her struggles (the two monkeys bore witness to the officials taking their anger out on reader over something trivial, their rage towards heaven growing stronger). the two grow more and more attached to her as time goes on.

and so they begin to work a small abduction into the grander scheme of their plan.

---

sooner or later, the monkey warlords properly raid heaven. they and their demon army storm the jade palace, murdering servants, footsoldiers, and as many officials as they can. the monkey king and the six-eared macaque lead a massacre so bloody it stains the palace walls red. wukong especially holds back none of his rage, getting caught up in his hatred for heaven and zealously continuing to shed as much celestial blood as he can.

during a lull in the chaos, macaque, covered in vicera, makes his way to the immortal peach grove. with the battle coming to a close and the demon forces being driven back, now is as good a time as ever to snatch up a special “peach” for himself and his brother.

he finds said peach preoccupied with a gallant attempt at protecting herself and a few lower maids from a demon soldier, using a series of barriers. the soldier breaks the barriers almost as fast as reader can make them, rapidly pushing her and her companions into a corner. reader puts up a brave fight, but she's a celestial attendant, not a celestial warrior.

macaque calls out to the soldier, halting their attack and telling them to regroup with the others and prepare to move out. the soldier complies, crassly assuring the women that they’re about to be nothing more than bloody pulp on the garden wall. no one has ever gone against the shadow general of the demon army and lived.

macaque waits until the soldier is out of sight before leisurely approaching the still quivering group of maids and their determined, but exhausted looking guard. reader tenses as he steps closer. she feels a horrible sense of dread crawl down her spine when she gets a good look at him.

the dark fur, the shape of the mask marking on his face...reader feels tears start to bead at the corners of her eyes.

this entire time, she'd been petting and coddling the six-eared macaque. the second in command of the dreaded demon army has been sitting right in front of her and she had no idea. reader can barely keep her breathing steady.

and if this is her dark-furred companion, then the lighter-furred one must be…oh stars.

…she let the monkey king in.

she practically threw open the doors for him. she didn’t report them when she should have, she knew there was something strange about them but she was so sure they were just normal animals—oh stars above, if the jade emperor ever discovered this, she’d be executed.

but…but reader steels herself. she can deal with that later. her friends are counting on her.

now, she’s certainly not expecting the blood-covered demon general across from her to be open to bargaining (he could just kill all of them now, but reader gets the feeling he wouldn't be merciful enough to end it quickly). and he knows exactly what leverage he has over her, she can see it in the smug look on his face.

but she tries anyways.

“let them go, please,” she begs breathlessly, arms shaking from the strain of maintaining her magic. the least she can do is buy her friends a moment more. “do whatever you want with me, but they are blameless.”

macaque chuckles, the sound reverberating lowly between the trees. whatever he wants, huh? oh, sweet peach. she should know better than to give him so much leeway.

“that is tempting. if that’s the case, then perhaps you’ll go with me willingly,” he muses, tail swaying slowly. his fangs glint dangerously when he smirks.

“don’t fight, and no harm will come to them. that, and your secret will be safe with me. honest."

reader doesn’t believe him. she can’t, but she and her friends are so low priority that calling for help would be useless. if the demon army has been as effective as the screaming would lead her to believe, the celestial host has much bigger problems than rescuing a gardener and some lowly maidservants. and with the chance that she’ll be seen through and blamed for every gory death that's happened beyond the walls of the peach groves...

she doesn’t have a choice.

reader slowly, cautiously lowers her barriers, despite the worried cries of the maids behind her. they cower closer together as reader takes a slow step closer to macaque.

with a flick of his wrist, reader is struck by a sleeping spell so potent she falls into macaque's waiting arms like a lead weight. the demon gathers his beloved into his hold with a gentleness that doesn't fit his gory visage.

he sinks into a shadow, leaving the maids to clutch each other and cry at the loss of reader and the near loss of their own lives.

---

reader wakes up days later in the royal bedchambers of the stone palace. she startles at seeing the monkey king and the six-eared macaque laying on either side of her, stripped to just a loose pair of pants each. she herself has been changed to a comfortable silk robe, her own clothing nowhere to be seen.

reader feels a cold sludge in her gut. she scrambles out of the pillow pit, kicking a few into the face of one of her captors as she goes. she checks herself over, looking for bite marks, claw marks, anything to indicate the two demons sharing a bed with her had violated her in any way. she looks, and breathes a heavy sigh.

she finds nothing.

"we figured we'd wait until you were awake to start marking territory," the tired, yet still somehow smug voice of the monkey king chimes from behind her. reader turns to see the demon leveling an amorous look her way. his gold and crimson eyes burn like fire in the low light.

reader ignores him in favor of falling to her knees and burying her face in her hands. now that she has a moment to think, her failure has decided to take centerstage; she was the one who let the monkey king into the jade palace, she let him steal the immortal peaches, she's the one who carelessly shared all the gossip that told them when the best time to attack would be, she's to blame for all the lives lost—

"hey. y'know we would've raided heaven even if we hadn't met you, right? it's not your fault," macaque says, propping his head in his hand to look at her. he doesn't have the decency to hide how he's sizing her up, poison purple eyes glowing whilst tracing her curves. reader shrinks into herself a bit more.

"yep. don't feel too bad, peaches. i was never gonna spare any of those bureaucrats in the first place," wukong adds. "and besides, none of those guys cared about you anyway, so why feel bad?"

reader sobs, pressing her hands to her eyes. she knows. she knows how callous the officials could be, but that doesn't mean they deserved to die. it doesn't mean the servants and foot soldiers who were only following orders deserved their fates.

she hears movement, then feels a set of strong, furred arms wrap around her. wukong rests his head on her shoulder. he nuzzles his nose against her neck. she feels his warm breath and the glance of deadly sharp fangs when he speaks.

"they didn't deserve the mercy you seem to think they did."

---

wukong places a seal on reader's powers. what little defense she had against them is gone with the placement of a brand-like marking in between her shoulder blades (and a few more along her shoulders made with his teeth).

reader can't do anything. wukong won't let her leave, and even if she could, the heavenly court will have her executed if she goes back. so, she remains on the monkey king's mountain.

she didn't think she'd share a fate with the precious fruit she'd failed to protect.

#bad end wukong #twice as bad au #immortal peach au #i guess??? cause shes an immortal??? #this got waaay longer than expected #got tired and couldnt figure out how to end it #dialogue is hard