#I just can’t stop I have so many of these planned

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 280

Let me kick down the door and- 

Nekomatta Danny. But not just any nekomata Danny. I am saying space cat boy. Twin-tails that seem to flicker into an aurora, into distant galaxies, ghostly flames that could be just that, or could be flickers of distant stars and suns. 

Now, the thing is? Being a ghost, very much illegal in the USA right now, doesn’t matter how many times they throw out the GIW, they can’t exactly take on the entire government any time soon. What isn’t illegal? Being an alien, meta, or any other magical creature. 

So the halfas, yes that (ugh, really Jordan) does include Vlad, all get together to hash out a plan to get out of Amity. And? They like cats, you like cats right? And they have friends- or allies- in the Zone, so maybe they can perhaps get a few… oh? What’s this? A cat-like creature with necromatic powers? Yeah they can- oh. Hm. So that’s replaced their ghost form now. 

That’s fine actually! They’re still ghosts- just erm, no longer human looking. And Vlad can continue to use his human form- yes we need to keep the bracelets on to hide the ears and tails, whatever- to continue running DalvCo. 

It’s not bad, and they’ll admit Vlad has been getting better. Sure there’s still a bunch of blackmail (Jordan, Sam, stop helping him-), but they honestly? Can’t be brought to care. They’re adjusting- grieving in some cases- and focusing on actually finishing everything before the summer ends. 

So it’s probably not a good time for heroes to start investigating Vlad…

If you want a basic summary on Bakeneko and Nekomata, which I HEAVILY recommend reading: 

https://yokai.com/bakeneko/  https://yokai.com/nekomata/ 

#DCxDP #DPxDC #Prompts #Danny is Not Ghost King #Halfa Trio #Most of Amity was maybe destroyed #Yes Tucker couldn’t stop laughing about how they all look like furries in ghost form #Honestly someone could make the ‘connection’ between Masters having a cat & some bakeneko taking the form of their previous master #They have not connected any sort of dots but well #Yes they all have cat ears & tails even in human forms #Valerie still has her dad but is on an “internship” with Vlad #Plasma Core Vlad #Ocean Core Jazz #Sun Core Dan #Space Core Danny #Metal Core Val #Life Core Sam #Storm Core Tucker #Moon Core Ellie #Yes Vlad does still go to the odd Gala or two but he’s known as a very hermit-esque dude lol #I wonder where they could have moved since people already know about the Wisconsin home #Honestly up to anyone who decides to write this lol #Remind me to draw my ideas for the designs later

[bluerosefox]

When Jason had been going to Gotham Academy, he had (for a good reputation for the media and to help him catch up on his penmanship, remember he had been on the streets and dropped out of school before getting picked up by Bruce for a while) signed up for a penpal project for 'less privileged people' to write to.

(Although Jason was annoyed the penpal project stayed within the states and only selected a middle of nowhere town, he knew the Richie Rich Elites would never subjugate their 'Heirs' to actual kids in need of learning how to read and write)

But Jason didn't mind his penpal.

Danny Fenton was a riot to talk, err write to in all honestly.

From his dry punny humor (and boy can he give even Dick a run for his money in the pun department but hey using some of them actually got Dick to warm up to him a few missions ago) and death jokes so many death jokes, to his nerdy love for space Jason enjoyed writing to Danny.

Even the short stories he would write about a ghost kid protecting a small town from other ghosts was interesting to read. He really liked the different kinds of ghosts there could be. Granted some seemed very OP like that Clockwork dude.

Jason liked writing to Danny, and even after the penpal project was over they had plans to keep sending letters, maybe even exchange numbers soon...

But then he died by the hands of the Joker.

The letters leaving Wayne Manor may had decreased but the letters being sent never did or at least until a few years ago.

Then Jason somehow returned to the land of the living.

Got taken by the LoA, tossed in the green waters and turned into their Pit Raged weapon for a while before leaving them behind and setting out for his revenge against the Joker and to force B's hand.

And becoming a Crime Boss for a while too. Can't forget that.

Point being with all this going on, the old warm memories of exchanging letters with Danny Fenton was pushed into the back of his mind and forgotten about for a while.

It isn't until one afternoon at Wayne Manor that while roughhousing with Dick, who had Jason in a brotherly headlock as they walked down a hall to one of the sitting rooms, that while Jason had slipped out of Dick's hold had stumbled into a hallway desk that had a few things on the top of it, one of the things being a small box that tumbled off when Jason hit it.

The box lid opened and out of it spilled out a good number of letters.

"Shiii-p, dang it Dick!" Jason said when he looked at the mess he accidentally made and stopped himself from swearing, the place might be named Wayne Manor but everyone knew this was Alfie's domain and no swearing was a rule within his halls.

Dick only laughed and teased only in a way a sibling can do "Hey not my fault your as big as a tank Jaybird! We should get you some caution signals if you keep bumping into things!"

Jason flipped him his favorite finger, thankfully Alfred only knew when they swore thus it did not summon him, and bent down to the letters.

His hands froze when he recognized the hand writing and the address it was sent from.

"From: Danny Fent Nightingale

Amity Park, IL"

To: Jason Todd-Wayne

Gotham City, NJ.

Wayne Manor"

And when Jason opened the letter. He really wasn't expecting what was written inside.

"Jason.

I'm finally leaving Amity Park. I can't be there anymore, not after everything. I'm too tired, and emotionally hurt. Everything is just to much. And I can't keep doing this to myself. My parents still can’t understand there is nothing ‘wrong’ with me or why I refuse to let them take care of Ellie, I refuse to let her live the way Jazz and I did, Jazz has to much on her plate already with her own life and college but she’s been hounding me to reach out to mom and dad, Sam refuses to listen to me when I tell her I want to be more than ‘Phantom’ in Amity Park, and Tucker is so busy trying to get into a good college and job we barely have time to talk nowadays. And don’t get me started on Vlad, that fruitloop’s been breathing down my neck since Ellie’s deaging.

Despite how much of a hellhole you like to call it, I think Gotham might be my, no mine and Ellie’s best bet of living some kind of life, especially now since the whole deaging she had to go through, she needs an ectoplasm rich city as well and since she has no actual papers because she was my clone and I remember you saying Gotham has people who can create new identities and-

I’m rambling again, to letter you again. I really need to stop it.

I can’t keep pretending you’re going to read these.

I know you’ll never read these. You’re gone. I can’t even find you in the Realms no matter where I look.

I’m sorry. For using you as, well, a way to vent my life for last couple of years. I shouldn’t had done it but it helped me.

Believing my friend was still alive and getting my letters I mean.

Again I’m sorry.

This will be my last letter to your ghost, pun unintended.

Goodbye Jason. Wish us luck in your city.

-Danny Fen-Nightingale...."

The sent date on the letter was roughly eight years ago.

#danny phantom #danny fenton #crossover #dp x dc #blue rambles #danny phantom dc #writing ideas #random idea #dpxdc #danny kept writing letters to jason even after his announced death #jason todd #danielle phantom #ellie phantom #deaged ellie #Jason asks Alfred about the letters #and Alfred says he nor Bruce had the heart to open them since they were addressed to Jason #instead Alfred put them away but because he hasn’t gotten a letter and with their chaotic lives he forgot #Jason is conflicted #should he reach out? to his old friend #Also what did Danny mean in his last letter? Deaging? with #he reads the other letters and realize the stories of a ghost boy might not just be stories #Danny is living in Gotham with Ellie #he cut some ties in Amity #He’s done his best to stay off the Bats radar though #he doesn’t wanna be dragged into the hero business again #He does meet RH when Ellie and her classmates are kidnapped though #what happens next is open ended #maybe dead on main? idk

[loveyourownsmiilee]

Hello :) I’m not used to asking questions on here but I’m just curious and I coupdn’t stop myself. How do you think they can turn this whole season the way so it has nothing to do with Buddie. Because since the first episode of season 7 they’ve been writing their lines with kind of a deeper meaning, in a way that can be understood like a foreshadowing in them going canon (like the whole jealousy plot where Buck is still so obviously confused to what/who he wanted, Tommy’s „MY attention?”, the coming out scene when Buck says he’s relieved and he looks anything but). I have my clown shoes on and I don’t see how they can end this season without giving us a hint at Buddie (my guess is Buck will have some kind of feelings realisation about Eddie) but knowing what they did to couch theory and other times where they crushed shippers hopes showing only their friendship and nothing more I’m trying to brace myself for another dissapointment. Like, we are all just so sure about Buddie, but what if the writers throw another curveball at us? And what could that curveball possibly be? Anyways, hope you have a nice day! 😊

Hello! Thank you for taking the time to send me a question! I’m always happy to answer 🥰

Here’s the thing, the last two seasons were all weird bc we had another show runner who point blank made it clear she wasn’t on board with Buddie being romantic in any way. She legit called that will reveal scene platonic and said it’s normal for best friends bc her mother and her female best friend did the same thing. She was allergic to queer people. We have the return of show runner who was the original show runner. He was always pro Buddie even if he never point blank said so. This man killed off Shannon bc he knew the fans were angry with her for leaving her child. He liked a tweet that said Shannon was Eddie’s beard. He’s been proactively and consistently sharing Buddie content before the season even started. Also talking about how much he enjoys Buck and Eddie’a dynamic and is going to try to hit that in every episode. The first episode was very much a reintroduction and what did they do? They showed Buck, Eddie, and Christopher as a whole ass family unit. They made it clear to everyone tuning in that those three are a family together.

Now I think the reason Eddie is soooo heavily intertwined with Buck’s scenes is bc it’s intentional. I also am under the impression, as I’ve said many times recently, that Tim not only spoke to Oliver earlier in the season about his plans, but also Ryan. There’s a deliberate reason as to why Oliver and Ryan are actively promoting this season together. I will die on this hill that Ryan is fully aware. And we had that confirmed when Lou pretty much said it was originally supposed to be Tommy and Eddie but things didn’t work out. So what that actually tells me is that Tim has plans to make BOTH Buck and Eddie queer. And he’s going with Buck first but will eventually get to Eddie. They already planted massive seeds in 7.05 by bringing up religious guilt and all that talk about Eddie’s Catholicism. It’s happening and that is a far better way to tell Eddie’s story than him being kissed by a man randomly. So I just, idk even with this new interest in Buck and Tommy, I truly don’t think it’s something that will divert the writers and show runner from their original plans, I should hope not. They can’t dismiss 6 years of development for a new love interest especially when said love interest is a literal copy of Eddie. So I don’t think they’ll switch gears and I think we’re on the same page as to what is coming up for them. Literally the fact that they made Buck bi confirms to me that Buddie is inevitable.

#juju answers #sopphiex #buddie #tommy kinard #911 speculation

[blank468]

Alright let’s beat the dead horse to the ground so hard that it can travel to the center of the earth. I found a tweet from someone who tries to defends Bakugo’s resurrection and say how it and his death raised the stakes in the final arc. I’m not going to reveal who made the tweet just to protect their identity but if you’ve been on Twitter you’ll most likely know where this paragraph came from.

“Edgeshot knows he can’t come back from this. Edgeshot is sacrificing his life to save a kid’s life I want everyone to remember that there aren’t as many pro heroes left after the first war many of the pros retired because of the discourse that happened after the first war. Plus, we know edgeshot’s efforts were in vain now, because Edgeshot isn’t the one who revived him He helped hold him together, but he didn’t bring him back to life. By pure luck, Bakugo’s own sweat exploded and jump started his heart. This type of stuff is seen in Shonen all the time, so I don’t wanna hear any complaining about this one. (Jjba pt3 spoilers until ⭐️) Let’s not forget when Star Platinum stopped Jotaro’s heart so Dio couldn’t hear the beat ⭐️”

First of all, I could care very little if Edgeshot was one of the majority of heroes that retired after the events of the war arc. Edgeshot as a character is a nobody. I’ll be honest, I thought he was pretty cool when he showed up in Kamino and his quirk looked interesting. But just like a majority of characters with interesting concepts, Edgeshot falls back into the corner and is given barely anything to do and has had no meaningful impact and connection with anyone before the final arc even started. I don’t feel anything about him sacrificing himself for Bakugo because he has never been shown or established to have any sort of character for me to give a crap about. I don’t care if he and Best Jeanist were students together at UA. I don’t care if he’s going to end up as dental floss for the rest of his life. I certainly don’t give a crap that Bakugo is now feeling grateful to be brought back by some hack who he had barely knew.

Speaking of Bakugo, if all of this is really Horikoshi intended to happen in his story, then why not do the basic thing when writing any story is to make a plan. There clearly should have been a dynamic between Bakugo and Edgeshot for this moment to feel impactful than it does. Horikoshi really dropped the ball with having his favorite character join Deku and Todoroki in the work study with Bakugo. He can’t go through a single arc that Bakugo is in without getting him involved with crap he has no real contribution to. I said in a previous post that Wonder boy has no real purpose/contribution in the main story line. His involvement with things like Deku, OFA and other side plots doesn’t amount to anything other than mindless yelling, guilt tripping, and just him treating everything as damn a competition. An egregious example would be the Endeavor Agency arc. Him acting ad the third wheel along with Deku and Todoroki doesn’t do any thing but give us more annoying moments with him. It’s one of the reasons why I dislike the dynamic between these three. I could on about why their dynamic is the most annoying and stupidest crap I’ve seen but that’s for another story. So back to the Endeavor Agency arc, He acts incredibly aggressive and inappropriate when he’s with the Todoroki family. He’s only in that arc so he can have power progression.

If Horikoshi wanted me to care about his dynamic with Edgeshot, why couldn’t he just have Bakugo do the work study with him instead of making a third wheel just because he’s afraid that his fans will get upset. Bakugo taking up on a work study with Edgeshot would have given the story a chance to do things that would have improve the final arc than it does. Let’s list them.

1. It gives a chance for Bakugo to develop as a character on his own with it being related to Deku

2. It could have helped painted Bakugo in a better light b having him feel guilty about Best Jeanist and make him regretful for his shitty attitude towards him during his internship

3. It would have given the creator an excuse to establish Edgeshot as a character and his relationship with Best Jeanist.

4. Edgeshot would give Bakugo some words of advice about not getting hung up over your past mistakes and focus more on improving yourself.

5. Edgeshot would have stated that he doesn’t blame Bakugo for what happened in Kamino; especially towards Jeanist

Second of all, what exactly is in vain here exactly? The only thing that I can think of that is in vain is his ego. Edgeshot I would think would have been better established to be more than just a support hero if he can do medical treatment on a battlefield. He had knowledge of this ability all this time and he chose to randomly choose it on this one kid who he barely knew.

Third of all, just because you excuse something by saying it’s a Shonen and you should expect it to happen doesn’t automatically excuse bad writing. Most shonen not only establish the world so the audience can get familiar with but they alsocreate rules on how stuff work like power scales for example.

Where in this story has it been established that Bakugo’s quirk can jump start damaged organs with the touch a tiny explosion? And how does that tiny explosion not do any damage to an organ that was or not have been stitched yet?

So basically what I’m saying is that Bakugo’s quirk somehow being able to jump start his heart was an asspull. And no, saying that you have spoken to a real doctor to get knowledge on the science of heart surgery doesn’t excuse your bad writing. It was already bad enough that a nobody character came in and turned into the world’s greatest surgeon incredibly late in the story, but the very thought that Wonder Boy’s quirk was able to jumpstart his heart without it damaging him is not only ridiculous but it ruins the stakes for this story. Why as a reader would I feel worried for a character if I know they’re going to be fine? Imagine if there’s a sequel to MHA and Bakugo as a Pro hero gets pummeled by a villain and his limbs were broken to the point where shouldn’t move. Would Horikoshi have Bakugo’s quirk somehow instantly heal his wombs and he’ll get back up like nothing just happen? How many fake out deaths is the creator’s pet going to have in this story? The amount of times characters have walked out of situations that should have killed them is not only laughable but proves why the story has no real stakes.

#bnha critical #mha critical #anti bakugo katsuki #anti bakugou #anti katsuki bakugou

[jam-showtoonz]

Ruin Eclipse!! (My au)

[before someone yells at me, when I make mistakes I can’t undo them if they are in pen]

[with this said- I hate how Sun looks and will probably redo this at some point]

Have some lore too-

Ruin still has his Sun & Moon in his head, they can’t take full control but they can see through his eyes and sometimes even talk through him. The only person they ever talked to was Solar.

Sun has a plushie addiction that Ruin fully indulges in, Moon doesn’t mind too much. He just wishes sun wouldn’t make a big seen.

Moon talks the least outwardly and often has Ruin tell what he is saying.

Both Sun & Moon have their own rooms within the mindscape. Suns room has a hammock as well as a load of plushies and pillows and pictures on the walls, whilst Moon has a kind of nest bed with a ton of blankets and pillows, he also has a crap ton of video games that he and Sun play on occasion.

Ruin was actually hesitant when it came to his plan as he knew Solar would die, he tried everything he could to try and make it so Solar wouldn’t but he couldn’t find anything. Up until the day he executed his plan, he drove himself insane trying to think of something, sometimes even thinking about not doing it.

Unfortunately, he was hit with the awful truth that if he didn’t go on with his plan then this Dimension would collapse due to something the creators were doing. So he committed to save them and many more.

After all, what is one life to trillions?

He could save one and let trillions of Dimensions die, including this one, so some mad men could experiment with Wither Storms.

Or

He could save trillions and kill five thousand dimensions, including the person he cares about. The only true friend they have.

He never said anything about this world dieing. Even though it might have given him something- he doesn’t deserve anything, he just killed his only friend.

Sun stopped talking for about a week, leaving Moon as his only company as Sun hid in their room.

Ruin isn’t sure how much longer he can keep his emotionless mask from breaking. He could handle the aftermath of the collapsing dimensions, he couldn’t handle Solar’s death. It doesn’t help that when Sun started talking again they kept asking if what they did was the right thing.

When Solar comes back is when Ruin has a complete mental breakdown, as well as Sun. Moon mostly just stares in utter shock and it’s one of the first times he talks on his own.

((Obviously Solars gonna get home eventually. It just takes awhile.))

#tsams #sams #the sun and moon show #sun and moon show #tsams au #sams au #tsams ruin #sams ruin #tsams art #The Not So Empty Void au #this Ruin is not okay and is only alive because the others won’t kill him #he’s not happy about it #Sun has a plushie addiction #good for him! #Moon tries to reason to them and himself that what they did is what they had too #they don’t believe this but they are trying!

[letters-from-dekarios]

fighting fate

summary: you had some choice words for your friend who set you up on a not-so-blind date. but, because it went well, you decide to meet with him again. it’s not long before the spark reignites like when you first met, and you can’t help but fall for him.

or: you go on a second date with gale

word count: 5.5k

tags: *this is a sequel to ‘a blind date with a wizard’, you do not have to read it before this one :)* gale x implied f!reader/afab!reader, astarion and shart are terrible wingmen, elf!reader, fluff, some small angst, mildly medium burn, alcohol usage, wyll is also there and also your ex, omg karlach is also there

author’s note: this is my little disclaimer that i personally love wyll! i’m just using him as a plot point since there’s not many other main chara options that haven’t been mentioned already (that i would use in his place). its for the plot guys i swear i’m a wyll lover too

Okay, maybe you couldn’t be mad at Astarion and Shadowheart. Yes, they betrayed your trust by setting you up on a faux blind date with their wizard friend who already knew your entire life story. And yes, they did not take accountability for their lies and instead kept asking if you enjoyed yourself. But, their little plan worked, and you were scheduling a second date with the man they set you up with.

“I am still pissed at you both. Especially you, Astarion,” You glared at your friend as he flipped through outfits in your closet. Shadowheart was busy doing your makeup, turning your face back towards her.

“Look, you can’t stay angry forever. You needed someone to get your mind off of Wyll. I just did what I do best,” he replied, holding up one rather… skimpy outfit that you turned your nose up at.

“Lying? You could’ve at least told me a little about him so I didn’t feel so mortified! You told him all about Wyll and when I tried to vaguely mention that I had a bad breakup, he already knew all about it!” You huffed, and Shadowheart grabbed your chin to steady your face. She gave you a cautionary look as she got underway applying your eyeliner, her hand steady and precise. She had cast duplicity to do both sides at the same time, which made the process much easier.

“Sweetheart, if you knew half the things about him you’d refuse to meet with him. I kept you in the dark so you can see for yourself who he is,” Astarion held up another outfit, one a bit more casual but still would be pretty on you. You nodded in approval and Shadowheart nearly had an aneurysm.

“If you don’t stop moving your damn head I’m going to let you leave here looking like a sibriex,” Shadowheart warned you again, and you took heed of her notice this time.

With your makeup done and your outfit fresh, all you had to do was wait for Gale to arrive. The two of you had been back and forth for weeks now, mostly updating each other on current things you were up to. A few days prior, with your schedules finally open, he had sent word of when he’d like to take you out and you responded as soon as you could. Now, you waited for the date to commence.

“You can at least thank us for our assistance in getting you out of the house. Had I not convinced you to go on that blind date, you’d still be crying over Ravengard’s oldest disappointment,” Astarion remarked, and you snorted at the insult of a name.

You sighed after, messing with the ends of your hair. “You can’t blame me for being annoyed. You wouldn’t like it if I set you up with someone and told them you were a vampire before you could,” you raised an eyebrow at him knowingly. He couldn’t deny that you were correct on that front, but he wasn’t about to say that to you.

“Just be grateful he didn’t tell Gale about your little misadventures as a—“ Shadowheart began, and you quickly clamped your hand over her mouth, shushing her.

“Don’t mention that! It’ll bring bad luck to my date tonight,” you frowned, and both of your companions busted out in laughter.

You continued chatting until a soft knock sounded on the door, and you screamed internally. After getting up from the couch, you made your way to the door. You took a breath, eased your mind, and then opened it up for him.

“Hey,” you beamed at him, trying to contain your excitement. He bowed in acknowledgement and pulled out a small bouquet from behind his back.

“Good evening, my lady,” he smiled at you, extending the flowers in greeting.

You felt your face become hot while a small giggle left you. You took them from him and briefly smelled the assortment. “They’re lovely, thank you,” you replied, inviting him inside for a beat so you could set the flowers down.

“Well if it isn’t my favorite wizard of Waterdeep!” Astarion swung his legs over his chair, standing and heading towards him. He slumped his arm over Gale’s shoulders, patting his back. “Isn’t he just amazing, Y/N? Such a gentleman— is that bluestars I smell?” Astarion whacked him on the back once more, stepping around to you as he observed the flowers. Bluestars was a rather expensive perfume in Faerùn, costing over two hundred gold pieces for just a small bottle. You had never smelled it before, but you were sure you would later.

“Leave him be, Astarion,” you gave him a look, voice low to avoid Gale hearing you.

“Ah, I pay no mind to Astarion anyway,” Gale watched you as you placed the flowers neatly in a vase and filled it with water. “If I did, I sincerely doubt I’d be here at the moment,” he chuckled, and you beamed at the reply.

“You’re such a pain, Gale. You know that?” Astarion whined, before slipping back over to the couch.

“I’m sure he’s plenty aware,” Shadowheart called over her shoulder, focused on a book she had brought out.

“Thank you, Shadowheart, for your helpful insight on the matter,” Gale retorted, raising a hand to you once you were done with the bouquet. “Shall we?”

You took his hand, your face flushing again as he led you out the door. “We shall,” you answered, smiling sweetly at him.

“Bring her home before one!” Astarion called out as you both left.

“Oh, that may be difficult!” Gale retorted, allowing you to close the door behind you both as you departed.

“What, you plan on stealing me away for the whole evening?” You raised an eyebrow at him suspiciously, laughing as you interlocked your arms and he began to walk with you.

“Perhaps.. if you’d let me,” he nudged you gently, before leading you off to a small restaurant in the heart of the city.

“Hmm… it’ll depend on how this night goes,” you flirted, patting his arm tenderly. Soon enough, you were being seated inside the little restaurant, and looking over the menu. Everything looked… expensive. You didn't want to hurt the man’s coin pouch, assuming he was paying for it, but there weren't exactly any reasonable options, either.

“What are you getting?” You questioned, and he pointed to some mildly pricey menu item. That was your hint at expenses, and you picked a dish that sounded promising but wasn’t going to put you in debt if you ended up paying for yourself.

The date was filled with idle conversation, the two of you discussing parts of your home life here and there, commenting happily on the food you ate, and just sharing the good parts of yourselves. It was going great, extraordinary even.

Until he showed up.

Wyll Ravengard. You didn't even feel the eyes burning into the back of your head until you heard someone pleading with him to stop, attempting to keep him back. You flicked your attention over to the commotion, eyes going wide as you saw him. You wished you hadn’t made eye contact, that you’d minded your business, but you hadn’t. And now you had to deal with it.

You wanted to shrink down into yourself. Disappear into nothing- hide under the table like a small child. With the way things ended, how could you face him? He was a gentleman for your whole relationship— until he wasn’t. You couldn’t stand to see the face that spoke to you in such a way that night. No matter what influence he was under, what he did that night you broke up… you couldn’t forgive him.

You recalled the many nights after that fight, how depressed you had become. He tried several times to get your attention and apologize to you, but you were so wrapped up in yourself that it was hard to pay attention to anything. Some nights he was kindly about it, others he was swearing like a damned sailor who couldn't take no for an answer. You weren't sure who he had become, and no matter how hard he tried he was unable to reverse the past.

“Y/N!” He shouted your name, and you put your head in your hands. Maybe if you didn't see him, he would disappear.

“Wyll, please, not here-“ his friend Karlach, you recognized her as, tried to hold him back. But with his thrashing and flailing, he managed to worm his way free of her grasp.

“Impero te!” Gale moved to his feet quickly, and Wyll froze in place. You recognized the words as a command spell. It appeared Gale chose that over a holding spell, perhaps so he could speak with Wyll first. You knew it would wear off soon, so you placed your coin on the table and got up.

“Don’t you dare leave, Y/N!” Wyll exclaimed, and Gale turned to check up on you.

“I’m okay,” you reassured him, smiling faintly as you grabbed your things. “I’m just going to go outside for a minute.”

He nodded and waited for you to leave before his attention was on Wyll again.

You weren’t sure what happened after that, but only a little while later and both men were being tossed out by two guards you’d seen in the restaurant earlier. Gale’s face was down, his hand held up to his nose, and in the candle-lit street, you could faintly make out blood on his knuckles.

“You bastard!” Wyll ran to, presumably, take another swing, but Karlach grabbed him in time before he could.

“Gale-“ you rushed to his side, now that Karlach had a tight hold on Wyll, and checked him for any other injuries.

“I’m alright, I’m alright,” he soothed, despite the blood dripping down his face. You reached into the small bag you had brought and took out a cloth, gently wiping at his face.

“Does this jackass speak for you now, Y/N?” You heard Wyll snarl, followed by Karlach’s aggressive warnings for him to calm down.

“Mates, I’m really sorry for his behavior. I don’t know what’s gotten into him. Can I pay you back for the dinner?” Karlach surrendered, nodding down to a small coin pouch at her hip.

“It’s not your fault, you don’t need to pay for his stupidity,” you answered, moving Gale to sit down on a nearby bench. “Tilt your head back..” you instructed, a delicate motherly tone to your voice, and he did so, holding the cloth tight against his nose.

As you spun to face Wyll, you saw he was bloodied just the same. You had to hand it to Gale, he was more than just a gentleman. You sighed, composed yourself, and put on your bravest ‘what the fuck are you doing’ face.

“What do you want, Wyll?” You coldly asked, crossing your arms over your chest.

“You know what I want,” he huffed, still struggling in Karlach’s grasp.

“Actually, as a matter of fact, I don’t! It might surprise you, but I haven’t known what you wanted from me since the night we broke up. What could you possibly need from me after everything that transpired?” Your eyebrows furrowed together, irate with him. Thinking about that night hurt your mind and your heart, you’d much rather continue with your date like nothing happened. But, of course, the universe was always against you.

“Y/N-“ Wyll calmed slightly, his likely drunken stupor fading as he regained his senses seeing you like this. For a moment, he looked like how you remembered him. For a moment, he was yours again.

That quickly dissipated as he continued to speak, reaching towards you, begging, “I want you- I miss you. I should’ve never let this go, I should’ve never let that bastard get his hands on you. You’re mine, right? Like we used to say?”

You took a step back at his words, feeling sick to your stomach. After all this time, he still had that false hope he could get you back? That you still belonged to him? And what was worse, he called Gale a bastard. Again.

“I’ll have you know that bastard back there, is twice the man you ever were. I suggest you rethink your ownership because, to my knowledge, I belong to myself. I was finally- finally!- feeling free from your grasp and here you go, trying to steal my peace from me.” you clasped your hands together, groaning out in frustration before running a hand down your face. “I was done with you a long time ago, Wyll. Please, for the love of all of Faerún, let. Me. Go. Drop this faux apology and the pathetic act and move on with your life. That was embarrassing!” You sighed, running a hand down your face. The arguing in public was only adding to your humiliation, though many passersby just assumed you all were drunk.

“Y/N-“

“No, Wyll!” You cut him off, waving a hand dramatically to silence him. “I was so happy to be finally moving on from you and rebuilding myself after you left me in pieces and you had to come here and ruin it! You had to smash me to bits all over again! I just want to be happy, and you can’t even let me have that?” You could feel tears welling in your eyes, but you pushed them down like all your other worries. “Please, go home. Go away. I don’t want to talk to you, I don’t want to see you anymore, I want to go home. Without you.” It seemed that those final words got to him, and he realized his defeat.

As much as you had loved him in the past, he was no longer who you loved now. It was beyond you to change him to become the man he used to be, and you cried for the day he would find the love he would become that for. You wished he could do that for you but you knew it wasn’t right. It wasn’t even worth it anymore. Besides, you had to get Gale home and cleaned up anyway. What good would worrying about Wyll do for you?

“You’re sure you don’t want any coin, mate? I feel awful about all of this,” Karlach offered again, and you waved her off.

“Get him home safe, that’s all I ask,” you replied, and they were off. You watched as Wyll’s sad, defeated eyes stayed locked with yours until they were far enough away, and your heart broke all over again.

Gale knew when not to meddle in things that didn’t concern him, so he left that talking up to you. It was not his place to speak to Wyll for you, but his charming act of heroism in punching the shit out of Wyll was plenty for you.

You took another breath, unclenched the fists you had unknowingly created, and returned to Gale’s side.

“How are you doing?” You asked him, kneeling in front of him as he laughed softly.

“As good as a man with a broken nose can be. You don’t happen to have any healing potions on you, do you?” He replied, smiling at you.

“Not here, but I have some at home,” You offered, and he shook his head no to that.

“I’d rather not return to Astarion’s commentary on my little.. quandary here,”

You pondered for a moment, and then a metaphorical lightbulb appeared over your head. “Vis medicatrix,” you chanted, placing your hand on his arm to heal the wound. Blue light emitted from your palms and eyes for a moment and then faded. Why you hadn’t thought of that prior, you had no idea.

“There. How do you feel now?” You repeated, and Gale lowered the cloth from his nose. He breathed in and out a few times, and then nodded in satisfaction.

“You’re quite good at that,” he chuckled, trying to wipe off as much blood from his face as he could. His knuckles were covered in Wyll’s blood, you noted, and you were oddly surprised Gale didn’t have more marks on him from whatever took place inside.

“What even-“

“Perhaps later.”

You pursed your lips in understanding, standing straight as you waited for him. Where would you head off to now? He looked a mess, and you could hardly stand to be around everyone who had just witnessed what occurred. What would people say? They undoubtedly recognized Ravengard’s son, so what would the rumors tell about you? Those were worries for a later time.

“There’s a travel sigil nearby if you’d like to head to my home in Waterdeep with me,” Gale offered, and you interlocked your arms again when he stood up.

“I’d like that,” you agreed, letting him guide you home.

After a bit of walking and some magical travel, you were inside Gale’s rather lavish tower in Waterdedl. The walls were practically lined from floor to ceiling with books, showing his studious nature. The smell of thousand-year-old tomes and scrolls filled your lungs, mixed with the neverending hint of brandy and vanilla. He took good care of his belongings, despite his continued apologies over what he considered a mess. Though, the only clutter you saw was that of a well-studied scholar. It was impressive just how many books he had, and you wondered if he really had read all of them.

“I believe I have a bottle of Ithbank somewhere around here, let me get myself cleaned up first,” Gale offered, and you had half the nerve to speak up.

“Let me help you,” you proposed, and he smiled at you. That cheeky, knowing smile, akin to one Astarion would give you when you’d talk of something scandalous he was already doing. He nodded his head in the direction of his washroom and you followed along behind him, allowing him to sit on a small stool as you wet a rag.

“Well, go on,” you urged, tilting his face up by the chin as you stood between his legs. Gently, you began washing the blood off of his face. “What happened?”

“After you stepped outside, Wyll began saying some rather choice words,” Gale recounted, the night's events playing over in his mind, eyes ever trained on you. “He wouldn’t cooperate with leaving. He took the first swing, I assure you. It’s not like me to throw first, or even second. I usually counteract with magic but, albeit adrenaline was forefront in my mind, a more physical response felt qualified.”

You chuckled at him, shaking your head as you took his hands and cleaned them off, too. “I’m not a damsel in distress, you know. I just didn’t want to deal with him.” You informed him, wanting to make perfectly clear your reason for aversion.

“Oh, I’m fully aware. But I like to play the white knight now and then, if you’d indulge me,” he grinned, turning his hand in yours and taking it gently. He kissed the top of your palm in thanks for your help.

You giggled at him, splashing his face gently with water, to which he gasped, reached over towards the sink, and splashed you back. You both burst into laughter as you started a miniature water fight, flicking water droplets at one another. You, though, wouldn’t give up this nonsensical fight so easily, and splashed a small cup in his face. His expression turned sour and you darted out of the washroom, Gale quick on your tail, and began dashing around bookshelves to avoid him. The initial droplets soon became minor castings of ‘create water’, both of you careful not to damage the papers surrounding you.

“This honestly seems unfair!” He called over to you as you shimmied behind a small space between two bookshelves. Abruptly, he went quiet and you began to peek around some books to see where he was.

He didn’t even say a word as he wrung out his cloth over your head, your hair becoming completely wet.

“Gale!” You screeched, turning around to his shit-eating grin. You whipped out your cloth while grabbing his collar, suddenly pulled his shirt slightly off his body, and wrung out all the remaining water from yours down his chest. Then, you flattened his shirt against his chest, allowing it to become soaked in its own right.

He jumped slightly at the coolness and glared down at you, albeit playfully. He quickly pulled you against him by the waist, effectively getting your clothes damp, too.

“You know, this is one of my favorite shirts. It’s not supposed to get wet like this so the fibers don’t fray,” Gale hummed, staring down at you with a suggestive look in his eye.

“Oh? How ever will I repay you for ruining it?” You asked, batting your eyelashes at him with faux innocence.

He thought about it for a moment, pondered just a beat too long, and tugged you close against his hips. He leaned down towards you, letting his nose brush against your own.

“A simple apology should suffice,” he smiled softly, looking down into your eyes.

“Well,” you lowered your voice, your eyes flicked from his to his lips, and back up again. “I’m so sorry, Mister Dekarios..” your hands made their way to his chest, and you planted them flat against him. “I should dry this off for you too, shouldn’t I?” You pouted, pulling out the wide, cutesy eyes for him.

He took in a breath, placing one hand on top of yours while the other rested on your lower back. “While I love that offer..” he started, brushing his lips against yours, “Let’s take things slow, yes?” He asked, and your breath hitched. Good gods. You couldn’t believe how goddamn gorgeous he was up close. You wanted nothing more than to spend the whole night with him, whatever that would entail.

“Y/N-“

“Yes.” He didn’t even need to ask, but he started to anyway. Almost instantly, his lips were against your own, the hand on your back gently pulling you closer to him as if there was any distance keeping you apart. Your eyes fluttered closed, indulging yourself entirely the moment.

You replied instantly to him, grabbing at his shirt as you leaned up towards him. One of your hands released the fabric and slid up his shoulder, then into his hair, tugging gently.

He hummed happily in response to the pull, grabbing tighter at your waist. After another beat, he drew back and rubbed his nose against yours.

“Gale…” Your eyes slowly opened again, ever so slightly still shut, looking up at him with an unknown kind of intensity and love.

“I know…” he whispered, pressing a small kiss to your lips again, before he trailed down your neck with them, his hands solid against your back and keeping you steady.

You let out a soft, satisfied little groan, running your hands through his hair. He pulled back again after another brief indulgement of his thoughts and looked down at you. He was so perfect, you almost felt bad for making him deal with you and all your imperfections.

“Can I stay the night with you?” You asked, and then panicked as you realized he might get the wrong idea. “Not- like- we don’t have to do anything! I just… want to be here… with you…” your voice went quieter by the minute, and he chuckled at your shyness in asking.

Tilting your head up by the chin, he calmed your nerves. “Of course, you can,” he leaned down to you, pressing another small kiss to your lips.

He slowly pulled away from you, his hands ghosting on your waist before he stepped back, coaching you to follow him with his all-knowing smirk, bringing you to his kitchen. As you followed, he pulled out the aforementioned bottle of Ithbank and two glasses. You hopped up onto one of the counters, watching him pour into each.

“So, I have to know,” he began, handing you the wine, “if you’d be willing to share,” he took a sip from his glass, stepping between your legs this time, “what exactly happened with Wyll? Because that kind of a reaction from someone doesn’t suggest that the breakup was just messy, it suggests that it was, well, horrid to say the least.”

You took the wine glass from him, wrapped your legs around his waist, and sighed loudly. “I’d like to know about you and your ex first,” you replied, taking a sip slowly, “I don’t know much about you and right now the scales are quite imbalanced,” you finished, setting your glass down beside you. You leaned forward, draping your arms over his shoulders, and began to mess with his hair.

“Ah, Mystra…” he chuckled, though it wasn’t as enthusiastic as it usually was. He pursed his lips together, frowned slightly, and then began to speak.

“As you may know, Mystra is the Goddess of Magic, the Mother of the Weave, if you will. And I, myself, am a rather proclaimed wizard,” he started, bringing your arms down from his shoulders as he stepped back. He began to manipulate the weave around you both, a soft purple light shimmering and sparkling between and around you. “From a young age, I was using the Weave. I had much of it mastered by the time I was just ten years old. One of Mystra’s former chosen, Elminster, took it upon himself to train me in her absence, as she was not alive at that point.”

You saw the face of a man, conjured by Gale, who you could only assume was the Elminster he spoke of.

“When Mystra came back, she had lost a part of herself in her former death. Thus, she was weak. But, she could still sense my fascination and usage of the Weave. Soon enough, she began appearing to me. Only briefly, mind you, she was still far too injured to show herself entirely, but she still did.” This time, you saw the face of a rather beautiful woman, whom he alluded to as Mystra. How had he given up a Goddess? Well, you’d find out.

“At that time, she picked me to become one of her Chosen. Recognizing my skill for harnessing the Weave, and understanding my desire and devotion to her, it was an obvious choice. She started mentoring me, showing me parts of the Weave I had not yet discovered,” he continued, using visualizations of the encounters to help guide the storyline. “Eventually, we became friends. And then, even closer than that. Lovers. I desired to become great for her- intertwine our souls together, prove just how much I loved her. Remind you, she was dead for a long time,” he paused, making sure you were following him.

“When she came back, she had to regain the parts of the Weave that she had lost. I, knowing this, happened across a tome that told of a portion of the Weave that Mystra had not yet been reacquainted with. Lost to time, the elements, and Mystra’s long respite, this part of the Weave had gone uncollected by her and was still separate. It was imbued with Netherese magic from the folly of one of her chosen from many centuries prior, that in of itself is a story for another time. I sought to retrieve it and return it to her as an act of love- or, perhaps, egotism. I shall never know the true intent of my heart in those days, but, rest assured, I am no longer the same,” he smiled warily at you, hoping he was not losing you in everything. Both in the storybook tale he was telling, and romantically.

“The act of mine failed, rather horrendously so. What mortal man takes a piece of the weave for himself? A selfish one, indeed. Cursed with this portion, it was bestowed upon me. There are many details that I’m leaving for the sake of not boring you, but in a gist that is what happened. And now, this Netherese magic rests within me, seeking out parts of the weave to regain what it too had previously lost. Without magical artifacts, death very well could be the consequence. So, safe to say, I am no longer on my Goddess’ good side,” he paused, debating on what else to say. “It’s an arcane hunger, that’s what my Tressym, Tara, and I have figured out. I must consume those artifacts regularly to ease the hunger and calm the orb, otherwise I’ll… well, let’s just say it won’t exactly be very pretty.” He laughed slightly again, that sad, disheartened chuckle, and you felt terrible for him.

Mystra had essentially cursed the man she claimed to love, and you found that unfair. Why wouldn’t she just reabsorb the magic? Why put him under duress when all he wanted to do was prove his devotion? You would never say it aloud, but you despised the Gods and their unusual cruelty at times.

“I… don’t know what to say. That’s awful, Gale.” You realized that the details he had provided to you on your initial date were rather vague. Now that he explained it in more depth, your situation with Wyll felt minuscule in comparison. What’s a lover's quarrel in the shadow of a devoted, lovesick chosen being cursed with a gift he intended for his Goddess?

“Do not pity me, Y/N. It’s the consequence of a foolish man seeking more than he could attain. Had I not been blinded by my insatiable need to grow stronger and unlock arcane secrets that were not mine to know, I would not be here. Mystra had told me to be content, and I just couldn’t listen. But had I, I would not be with you. If going back in time meant that I would lose out on what I have now, I would suffer it all over a thousand times more,” he smiled at you, the magic fading as he returned and stood in front of you again.

“You’d suffer through losing your Goddess’ favor for me?” You asked, and he nodded. The look in his eye… was one of complete seriousness. While soft, you could see the determination behind his gaze. He did not intend to fault you like he faulted his Goddess. He wanted to savor this, savor you. You weren’t sure whether to be scared, or honored. What else was he willing to risk for you?

“I’d disown even the angriest of Gods if it resulted in our union being inseparable,” he placed his hand under your chin, tilting your head up towards him. “I have only known you for a short period of my life, and yet I’d live a thousand more years with you if I could.”

You felt your eyes water, the sentiment touching your heart. You looked towards the ground, before throwing your arms around him and pulling him in for a hug. You wrapped your legs tightly around his waist, and he pulled you close against him.

“Thank you, for everything,” you told him, burying your face into his chest. He held you just like that for a moment, allowing his head to rest on top of yours. When you finally pulled away, looking up at him with the sweetest doe eyes, he couldn’t help but lean down and kiss you again.

“You’re adorable,” he laughed softly, kissing you again and again. Your giggles broke the kisses and you whacked him gently on the chest to get him to stop.

“Are you alright? I know that was quite a lot to take in,” he asked, and you admired his sensitivity to your headspace.

“I’m alright. I’m still stuck on the fact you eat magical items, though,” you joked, and he rolled his eyes at you.

“Alright, alright. Enough about me. It’s your turn,” he wrapped the conversation back around to you and Wyll, and it pained you for a second to think about it.

And then you looked at him, enjoying his glass of wine with you, and you couldn’t help but feel connected enough to talk about it.

Until you heard the birds chirping happily outside, the two of you labored over the blow-up with Wyll. It was a weight off your shoulders, bantering with him about all the shitty things that happened that night. Like two drunken schoolgirls talking shit about a mutual ex-friend, you both couldn’t help it.

You weren’t sure how long you slept, just that you were comfortable, warm, and safe. Safe within the tight hold of Gale’s arms, under the silk sheets that lined his bed.

You had this inkling feeling that all was right in the world. The universe, for once, was back on your side. Back on his side. It was like mending a pot with the age-old art of kintsugi- melding two broken pieces together with gold-dusted glue. Was it perfect? By no means. But it was together. It was whole.

You were whole again.

At least, until you got abducted by Mindflayers.

#baldur's gate 3 #fanfiction #for you #for you page #gale dekarios #gale of waterdeep #bg3 gale #bg3 #gale fanfic #gale fluff #gale angst #gale #baldurs gate gale #gale x reader #gale romance #baldurs gate wyll #baldurs gate 3 #baldurs gate astarion #astarion ancunin #bg3 shadowheart #shadowheart #bg3 karlach #karlach #wyll ravengard #bg3 wyll #baldur’s gate fanfiction #bg3 fanfiction #x reader #baldurs gate fanfiction #fanfiction angst

[pchelaus]

i read a rus fanfic once where for some chapters these two shared a body, not as in “Sock Opera”, they both have the same amount of control over the body. So i was thinking of an AU where bill somehow gets stuck in dipper’s body, idk maybe dipper touches bill’s statue several years after the wierdmageddon or (insert your own idea cus i have none). Now they have to figure out how to get rid of each other (i guess for the sake of this au there should be a reason bill can’t just kill dipper, let’s say he’s weak or maybe axolotl did give bill a second chance so he has to play nice), also bill may not be as helpful as expected because no way he will let pines family decide which way  they will dispose of him. Basically i just like to think of all the situations and interactions there can be with such set up

#also dipper will absolutely become a local freak at his uni #if he haven’t already #he is at least a weirdo there #i have some more ideas for this that i plan to draw #maybe #if i have time #bill enjoying insulting ford as dipper #so yeah even if they try to keep this situation a secret that won’t last for long #there is no way bill won’t spill the tea just to look at ford’s face #like this au for forcing two characters with poor communication skills to constantly interact with each other #they both need to have some alone time but can’t get any #at least they don’t have access to each other’s heads #i just don’t like the idea of it but also think that dipper at some point have secured his head with ford’s help #he was too paranoid even after bill’s “death” #not able to talk to each other in head will lead to dipper constantly “talking to himself” #he will get so many weird looks from people that he’ll just stop giving a shit #yeah yeah he’s a weirdo whatever he can’t waste time thinking about it #he has a certain demon to deal with #at some point dipper will start to wear colored lenses to cover his now yellow eye #imagine them putting lenses on for the first time #just sitting here with tears all over the face cause dipper’s eyes are not used to it #that scene provided by first-hand experience #throughout the AU they become something like a team #first week is a total disaster #a war inside one body #then they are just tired and exhausted #turns out bill can cooperate provided he also gets some things he personally enjoys #like spicy food or sometimes choosing what to wear maybe #i think i forgot to write some more things #guess i’ll add them to later posts

[iliveinprocrasti-nationn]

ppl will go “i’d notice if society was going to sacrifice a marginalised group of people and if they said that it’s ok that a bunch of people would die then i would stand against it” and then they’ll hear people saying “well only disabled and vulnerable people will die of covid” and go “yes this is normal and ok and fine”

#first of all it’s not only disabled people who are dying and also covid can disable you real quick and make you part of that group that #people are fine with dying #but also do y’all hear yourself bed sometimes. the amount of people who claim to be allies but with throw others aside as soon as it #interferes with their comfort #also there have been so many studies and reports and articles on how covid disproportionally affects poc. not to mention inequalities in #healthcare that come into play too when you’re dealing with a pandemic #but as soon as y’all have to stop going to parties or restaurants or isolating for two weeks when exposed or confirmed positive or even if #you suspect you have it. or any of the millions of other things that at this point are important facets of community care and protecting #yourself and others from a disease that has been proven and continues to be proven to do a lot of damage to the body #y’all just balk. you don’t drop your claims but that doesn’t mean you’ve dropped your allyship #I’d love to go back to normal. i’d love to go out without a mask and eat in restaurants and do all the things i did before covid #but i won’t. because i know that isn’t safe for me or my friends/family/community and also quite literally isn’t possible now because we’re #still in a pandemic. if you claim to be an ally to disabled people then prove it and mask #I can’t speak as fully on allyship to other communities who are disproportionately impacted but not masking harms everyone and if anyone #does want to speak on allyship to their communit(y/ies) feel free to go ahead #covid tw #fired up about this because i’m doing radioactive iodine treatment in a few weeks and my mother is taking no precautions. not only am i at #risk if i catch covid but if she gets sick i either have to postpone my treatment to care for her (which risks giving my cancer more time to #metastasise if there are cells left) or i have to figure out another plan for treatment since my current plan hinges on her help since i #have to isolate #im just tired and frustrated. a pandemic doesn’t stop just because you get bored #vent tw #this is not as eloquent as i wish it was and the lack of punctuation and tone can make parts confusing but i think y’all get my point

[troyandabedsnewapartment]

i love my friends so much. maybe soulmates are real.

#on friendship #one of my friends has been coming to visit me everyday in the hospital #we either laugh or sit it comfortable silence #everytime i thank her she tells me to stop because I would have done the same plus she gets to annoy me for hours and I can’t escape #my other friend came from out of town to spend a couple hours with me and he even planned a Dnd session for us to play #i spent so many years thinking about ‘the one’ and now I just want to sit in silence and soft laughs with you #my therapist was so right when she told me that you meet people that become your family #mine

[johndonneswife]

someone really should be talking about how difficult it is to plan a wedding - a gay wedding - when both of your families fucking suck

#who is talking about this!!!! let me know #idk i have 0 expectations for my family but they still somehow always manage to let me down which #i was anticipating #and i didn’t think i would care because i have never cared before #but liiiiiike. #i wasn’t expecting to feel sad rofl but my family is so fucking flaky. again i KNOW THIS i know i cannot rely on any of them #it’s annoying when i have given them a year and a half to make plans and i have had so many people tell me they would be there #just to back out or ghost or come up with some excuse #like do you know how expensive weddings are 😭 JUST fucking be honest with me and rsvp no #anyway i was very intentional with the few family members i did invite #and specifically invited people i have a rapport with / had a good (ish lol) relationship with growing up #people i have bent over backwards trying to please!!! and dropping everything to help them out #and they can’t even be bothered to communicate with me lol it’s fine. like. i do feel like it’s internalized homophobia at this point #or maybe they have hated me this entire time which is totally plausible #but they KNOW how much ayesha means to me and knows that no one from her family is coming to our wedding #at the end of the day it’s going to be like. 5 people from my family 1 from ayesha’s (her brother) and like 30-40 friends #which i am so grateful for obviously #i sound like such a brat but it’s also like - watching your family continuously choose drugs/alcohol over showing up for you - lol #AGAIN i’m used to this and expected as much but i’m still feeling bad #just rsvp so i can move on with my life please. stop telling me you’re trying to make it work when we both know you aren’t #i have so much more to say but i’m going to sound crazy even though i knooooow it is homophobia like i Know it #i think there are certain people i will finally go no contact with for good after this #which is a freeing thought but i only invited v few family members to begin with. there’s abt to be no one left lmao #probably for the best #ugh whatever #again i can’t help but feel a certain way when they have done more/traveled further for relatives they hardly know #meanwhile i was forced to spend so much of my life living for these people and for them alone #AAAAAAAA i just want to scream #text

[holyluvr]

Getting a good hit of indica that’s a little stronger than vapes I had last time after I ran out of my indica is Hallelujah Praise The LORD and that kid with ADHD

#… #I need indica or antipsychotics both to function. an upper and a downer of some sorts. stimulate then depress. over and over again. daily. #TBH one of the dreams/goals that I still haven’t let myself let go of despite knowing the stats and likelihoods of the outcomes…. #well anyway one of those dreams is to somehow fix this. to meet a doctor who has a treatment plan or life change idea that works on the drug #dependency / the ‘maybe’ acquired brain injury issues. #the ‘is this idiopathic narcolepsy or is this ABI from drs or would you consider this probable narcolepsy from ABI from drs or?’ issues. #the ‘it’s harder to put together a clear understanding of your health overall’ comments followed by silence bc they don’t need to say it lol #it’s hard because no one has known what my health ‘should’ be like. know one has any labs without me on psychotropic medication combos. #they have partial proof from brain scans for the conclusion that my brain was just .fried to deal with me/make me easy and good. didn’t work #and they don’t even need proof to know that medication combos in their own profession shouldn’t be used together or are only used together #in extreme cases with no options left that they immediately fucking jumped into and were lucky I didn’t DIE so many times but fuck yeah #now my brain hurts and I’m not how I was beforehand but don’t rlly know why or how to express it #and I feel alone there and then I have bitch ass doctors telling me to Just Stop The Meds For A Fee Weeks :-)! …..Dr u have no idea huh do u #a few weeks? give me 3 days before I’m having a psychotic episode that’s severe enough to warrant police arrest or 911 called for me. #that’s thousands of dollars in a legal psychiatric hold. and that’s if someone catches the signs on time before I potentially harm myself or #like yeah no I’m sorry doc but i can’t just Simply Stop or Substitute anti-anxiety drugs when I’ve had them holding me together b4 puberty. #anyway I’m still. hoping I’ll find some info somewhere or stories and people like me who figured something out or anything idk #because my medical testing is interfered by medications that I cannot stop taking (mainly benzodiazepines) without losing my mind now. bad.

[ghostickle]

Love having to help hold everyone else’s lives together but the second I’m struggling and need help then I’m too needy and being a problem

#god just once I want what I put into a person given back in return #I schedule and plan everything I make meals for everyone and drive people around #my whole life it’d always be my job to clean my brothers room and even now I’m the one that keeps others shit clean instead of themselves #and I really wouldn’t mind if any of it was returned #or at the very least don’t make me feel like shit #or like I give people rides but don’t get gas money and I make meals but no help paying for the groceries to make the food #and I can’t afford to sustain myself much less someone else #and I’m so tired #I work all the fuckin time #just once I want to get off and relax and not have to go and take care of a whole ass adult who’ll throw a fit if I dare say I’m hungry #or get mad at me when I run out of energy when I’m going non stop #ghost rambles #hh I’ll have some time to myself tomorrow morning before my blood tests at least #before I have to go home after and prepare for a taco night with friends #gonna go wander target I still have a gift card and maybe get a new piercing #I am excited for tacos and games with my friends I’m just so tired and tomorrow morning is my only break for the next week #I have so many appointments coming up and I picked up extra shifts

[strohller27]

.

#I think my landlords want more money for rent. #and my graduate assistantship ends soon. #which means I won’t have more money to give them #i shouldn’t be surprised at feeling like my situation is precarious. #it would be precarious anywhere. not just here. #but now that I didn’t get into the university I wanted to get into? #I’ve gotta come up with a plan. but I’m so burnt out. #I had too much faith in my abilities and because of that I didn’t spend enough time building myself a safety net #I didn’t provide other avenues for success because I was so focused on one of them #I’m so tired. I feel like all my efforts have been for nothing. I want to stop. but I can’t. I have to keep going #I got this far without quitting. I may want to give up but where would that get me? #a cramped room in a smoker’s drafty house? where I have to crawl under the desk to get to bed? no thanks #i just. i hate that I feel like I have to do everything by myself. #I almost feel more alone than I’ve ever felt. almost #if I knew what kind of help to ask for I’d try. but who would I ask? what would I ask for? #My brain feels like mush. I have both no thoughts in here and also waaay too many. #ugh памагити. как же быть

[curly-cottage-girl]

///

#just feeling a lot of things and I don’t like them bc they’re kinda ugly #I know this yearning and gaping hole in my chest is ultimately supposed to be filled with God #at least in the sense that I’m not driven to envy over others being loved more than me #but I def have not been good with prayer lately. at all :/ #I’m feeling discouraged in many ways too. I want to try to do more hobbies but the learning curve is so steep when i look at them #and I already have almost no motivation anyway so that discourages me even more #I wish I WANTED to do stuff #I wish I had plans and goals in my life bc as I get older it’s more embarrassing when i talk with ppl #had a preliminary meeting with a guy who does financial advising and that kind feel flat bc like #I have no goals I’m working towards #and also I don’t even know how to describe myself and what I like and all #I caved and thought maybe I’ll make a Catholic match profile bc maybe God wants me to be more proactive #even if I don’t think I would ever be able to do anything like online dating at all #bc I can’t even do regular dating irl #I want to have known the person for a long time first #but anyway that’s ANOTHER whole thing #so anyway I stopped making my account when I had to describe myself for the profile and I just drew a blank #like sorry I don’t do or like anything :/ #I mean it’s not true but it also kinda is? #but yeah now I get all sorts of emails from catholic match and I can’t unsubscribe bc you have to sign in to unsubscribe #and I technically don’t have an account yet -_- bc I didn’t finish… so stupid #maybe I should go back to therapy…. #but I really was feeling like I had hit a plateau. like really it was stuff in my life that needed to change #or spiritual healing and growth #and there was only so much that talking could do by that point after I had done a good amount of growing in self knowledge #not like it ever ends really but also I had to wake up early to have them before work #and also it’s money so yeah I stopped :/ #so IDK #idk what to do #either in my life or for my mental/emotional state

[scientia-rex]

When I was in ninth grade I wanted to challenge what I saw as a very stupid dress code policy (not being allowed to wear spikes regardless of the size or sharpness of the spikes). My dad said to me, “What is your objective?”

He said it over and over. I contemplated that. I wanted to change an unfair dress code. What did I stand to gain? What did I stand to lose? If what I really wanted was to change the dress code, what would be my most effective potential approach? (He also gave me Discourses on the Fall of Rome by Titus Livius, Machiavelli’s magnum opus. Of course he’d already given me The Prince, Five Rings, and The Art of War.)

I ultimately printed out that phrase, coated it in Mod Podge, and clipped it to my bathroom mirror so I would look at it and think about it every day.

What is your objective?

Forget about how you feel. Ask yourself, what do you want to see happen? And then ask, how can you make it happen? Who needs to agree with you? Who has the power to implement this change? What are the points where you have leverage over them? If you use that leverage now, will you impair your ability to use it in the future? Getting what you want is about effectiveness. It is not about being an alpha or a sigma or whatever other bullshit the men’s right whiners are on about now. You won’t find any MRA talking points in Musashi, because they are not relevant.

I had no clear leverage on the dress code issue. My parents were not on the PTA; neither were any of my friend’s parents who liked me. The teachers did not care about this. Ultimately I just wore what I wanted, my patent leather collar from Hot Topic with large but flattened spikes, and I had guessed correctly—the teachers also did not care enough to discipline me.

I often see people on tumblr, mostly the very young, flail around in discourse. They don’t have an objective. They don’t know what they want to achieve, and they have never thought about strategizing and interpersonal effectiveness. No one can get everything they want by being an asshole. You must be able to work with other people, and that includes smiling when you hate them.

Read Machiavelli. Start with The Prince, but then move on to Discourses. Read Musashi’s Five Rings. Read The Art of War. They’re classics for a reason. They can’t cover all situations, but they can do more for how you think about strategizing than anything you’re getting in middle school and high school curricula.

Don’t vote third party unless you can tell me not only what your objective is but also why this action stands a meaningful chance of accomplishing it. Otherwise, back up and approach your strategy from a new angle. I don’t care how angry you are with Biden right now. He knows about it, and he is both trying to do something and not doing enough. I care about what will happen to millions of people if we have another Trump presidency. Look up Ross Perot, and learn from our past. Find your objective. If it is to stop the genocide in Palestine now, call your elected representatives now. They don’t care about emails; they care about phone calls, because they live in the past. I know this because I shadowed a lobbyist, because knowing how power works is critical to using it.

How do you think I have gotten two clinics to start including gender care in their planning?

Start small. Chip away. Keep working. Find your leverage; figure out how and when to effectively use it. Choose your battles, so that you can concentrate on the battle at hand instead of wasting your resources in many directions. Learn from the accumulated wisdom of people who spent their lives learning by doing, by making mistakes, by watching the mistakes of their enemies.

Don’t be a dickhead. Be smarter than I was at 14. Ask yourself: what is your objective?

[fuzzyunicorn]

The amount of entertainment fodder I have in reserve is exactly why he🖤 had 2 put a stop 2 me

#don’t even ask what I was going 2 do w the Jan clip it was real fucking mean the caption I had cooked up #clearly I am rolling downhill gaining momentum and velocity by the fuckin’ second and I was just about to pick up even more steam (the #the girlplots were ramping up without a single sign of even lightly pressing the break so I hope this explains y I have 2 stop) #ur entertainment is NOTHING in comparison of his🖤 no likie of dis so I shall cease effective immediately #but jus know I had sum good ones marinating hehehe lolcats #don’t u guys even THINK about giving him grief over stopping me someone had 2 do it clearly I do not need an audience I can’t b trusted!! #if u ever c his🖤 hand over my mouth it’s bc he🖤 had 2 stop me on what I was about to say #self awareness moment: I think I genuinely enjoy seeing people’s genuine shock @ the out of pocket things I say #it’s so out of pocket u could never describe me 2 any1 u just would have 2 simply expose them 2 me and they may never ever recover #southern women who were taught 2 be civilized have no clue on how to handle me and I definitely like that yes surprise bitch! I just said #something so insane!!! #it’s not just the inability to handle me it’s the inability to even comprehend and compute what I just said u all know by now many examples #I could never b explained 2 his🖤 chain of command and it is not a good idea 2 expose people 2 me (for their sake not mine!) #noone complain ​bc as much as I fuckin’ yap abt him🖤 putting a collar n leash on my bitch ass I think it was past time he🖤 did exactly that! #was eventually planning my first ever caption 2 my first ever posted pic of him🖤 (w his🖤 permission of course) n I was gonna caption it: #My Cumlord now do u c y he🖤 HAD 2 stop me!?!? c the problem is I don’t find anything wrong w that caption that’s exactly my problem #legit he’s🖤 gonna either have 2 be my pr team or hire me one bc people are like do you c y this is the problem and I’m like no I fucking #don’t what is so wrong with what I just said and I just said something severely insane #I’m taking the phrase making his🖤 chest hurt anytime I post to a new level as he’s🖤 gonna never trust me on my captions and rightfully so I #have so far proved that over n over I need a pr team #DO NOT ever hire me for social media team the posts would be off the fuckin’ chain #I would appeal 2 no one but myself