#I haven’t had a proper meal or slept or finished my work for today

[ko-eko-ev-go-ms]

Me internally: If I don’t do things or sleep the next day won’t happen or exist

The next day: it is 7:42am

#thoughts #oni talks #there’s a better format for this but idk fuck man #I haven’t had a proper meal or slept or finished my work for today #and I have so much to do today too #and for the rest of the week #and yesterday was a weird weird dnd day filled with anger #also I’m scream inside at all of life and existence #and I haven’t found a way to obtain stimulation I crave so I can’t do anything bc everything is boring and/or stressful #and also if I start anything fun I can’t really enjoy it bc I know I gotta either do smth else or it’ll take time and effort or #it reminds me that time exist and after I do whatever it is I have to do things and this is oof #everything blurs together as I hazily try to rebuild structure #structure that I spent over a year Lowkey more building all at once while also trying not to implode #and as I have learned apparently I don’t function without structure which ofc makes making the structure itself difficult #also I didn’t even finish creating the structure I had originally a #and also I then hve to immediately throw it away and completely rebuild and then probably again but I don’t know when or where and AAAAAAHHH #I am a tiny wind up robot pls put me on a nice floor and face me in a direction I am currently facing the sky

[toastedkiwi]

Wrong Cards

Summary: on a fateful day, Chris meets you.

Pairing: Chris Evans x Teen!Reader

Warning: angsty, death, gun violence, blood, shitty childhood.

You haven’t had the easiest life. In all your 14 years on this earth, it’s been hell. You’ve been on the streets. You’ve been moved around all over the country and put into homes only to be shooed away. It became very apparent that nobody wanted you or cared. Not even teachers. You’ve dealt with abuse, bullying, pretty much any nasty thing that a kid shouldn’t have to deal with. A kid should be loved and wanted and taken care of but it seemed like you ended up with the short straw way too many times. Until you met Chris.

It was dark all around except for the parking lot light. You and Issac had gotten into a scuffle by these gangsters— wannabe gangsters. Punches were thrown along with threats. Then a gun went off. He was this 12 year old you met— he lost his home and his abusive parents. You were looking out for him. You had gotten in front of him and took the hits and beatings. But Issac took the bullet.

Chris heard your crying and calling out for help. He ran. He pulled out his phone and came around a truck to see the scene. Your hands are covered in blood as you’re doing chest compressions on your dying friend. He can tell that you’re way too young and Issac is way too young to be shot. You’re just kids.

“Help! Please!” You begged.

Chris dials 9-1-1 and presses call. He pulls off his scarf and gets on his knees. He puts his scarf over the wound that oozes blood. He holds it down with one hand while the other holds his phone and he already feels the warm blood soak through the fabric.

“911, what’s your emergency?” The operator asked.

“A- A kid’s been shot,” Chris said as calmly as he could for you. “He’s losing a lot of blood. You gotta hurry.”

“Where are you, sir? And is the shooter still around?”

Chris gives the street and said, “I don’t know. Probably.”

He’s told to stay on the line so he puts the phone on speaker and puts it on the ground. Chris can see that you’re struggling.

“Switch with me, kid,” Chris said.

You looked up at him with a quiver of the lip. You nod and it’s a quick switch. He’s doing chest compressions and you’re applying pressure to the wound.

“What happened?” Chris asked.

“I- I can’t tell y-you,” you said.

You both hear the sirens of the cop cars and the ambulance. He looks at you to see your own face has been beaten. Your bottom lip is slit and bleeding. You have a cut over your right eye brow and it’s also bleeding. Your cheek is starting to bruise already.

“What happened?” Chris asked.

You kept your mouth shut. The ambulance rolls into the parking lot following a cop car. The paramedics rushed over. The cops immediately asked where the shooter is and you pointed the way to them. They head off and the paramedics take over. Chris has to pull you away from Issac. More cops show up.

“No pulse,” one of the paramedics said. “Shocking to 200. —Clear.”

You clenched your jaw tightly as you watched them try to bring your friend back alive. A cop is trying to talk to you. You haven’t slept in days. You haven’t had a proper meal in months. You don’t even know what day it is. And you’re numb.

“He’s gone,” are the words that you hear.

You screamed and cried. Chris stops you. He can’t believe the situation he’s in at the moment. He doesn’t know you at all. He doesn’t know the kid that’s dead on the wet asphalt of the parking lot. He just wraps his arms around you. You fight against him but you’re weak. You’re not that strong and Chris is an adult who religiously works out.

“Stop, stop,” Chris said. “He’s gone.”

You cried harder and managed to put all your strength into clutching onto Chris. He’s keeping you on your feet. If he wasn’t holding you, you’d be running till you have to stop and then you might be dead somewhere else.

~~~~~next day

“Y/n, you’ve got a visitor,” Andrew, a nurse, said coming into the room.

Chris Evans followed behind with a giant gift bag. You recognize him from last night. The one person who came when you called for help.

“Hey,” Chris said coming into the room. “I got you something.”

You’re left alone with the actor. He places the bag in your lap. You’re very confused. You’ve never have been given anything in these 14 plus years on this earth. It’s a first.

“Why?” You asked.

He sits down on the edge of the bed and faces you.

“Just open it,” he said.

You squinted at him. He grabs the pink tissue paper and tosses it behind himself.

“There,” Chris said. “Now, you pull out what I got for you.”

You pull out this LEGO set and Chris pulls away the now empty bag. You look at the front. It’s the Super Hero Airport Battle with Captain America, the Winter Soldier, Scarlet Witch, Iron Man, War Machine, and Antman.

“Why are they fighting?” You asked. “Superheroes don’t fight each other.”

“You haven’t seen the movie?” He asked.

You shook your head no and said, “I’ve only seen Iron Man 3.”

“Really?” He asked surprised. “Just Iron Man 3?”

“Yeah. That was when I had parents that wanted me,” you said and you looked back at the box of legos.

“What happened?” Chris asked. “If you don’t mind me asking.”

“They’re dead like Issac,” you said. “They died in a fire. The house burnt down.”

“That sucks,” Chris said looking at you.

“I know,” you said. “Now, you didn’t answer my question. Why are they fighting?”

“There’s this document called the Sokovia Accords. All these countries wanted all the superheroes to sign them,” Chris started telling you. “And make the superheroes liable for their mistakes. The governments of the countries wanted to tell the heroes where they can go help and where they can’t even if people need help.”

“That’s stupid,” you said.

“Right. It’s pretty stupid. So, Iron Man, War Machine, and a few other Avengers signed the accords but Captain America was like, ‘fuck that.’ And so the Avengers were split,” Chris said. “They had one team— Team Cap, obviously the best team and they had another one- Team Iron Man.”

“Who wins?” You asked.

“Nobody. They’re divided,” he said simply.

“All because of the government?” You asked.

“Pretty much,” Chris said.

“Thats fucked up,” you said.

“Language,” he said.

“That’s messed up!” You corrected sarcastically.

“Much better,” Chris said with a shit eating grin on his face. “Why don’t we get started on building the set?”

He pulls over the table. You sit yourself up crisscross even though there’s pain in your ribs and abdomen but you haven’t asked for any painkillers. Chris gets onto the bed more invading your space.

“Take off your shoes, you wild animal. Haven’t you learned anything?” You sassed.

He immediately takes off his shoes giving you this exaggerated annoyed look. He gets onto the bed and sits across from you crisscross. You try to pick off the tape. He lets you struggle trying to get open the box.

“What’s your favorite superhero?” Chris asked but he has a feeling that it’s Iron Man.

“Whoever can get the stupid ass box open,” you said putting the box on the table in between the two of you.

Chris chuckles and takes the box. He rips it open and tears the back wide open.

“There we go,” he said putting it on the table.

“That was obnoxious,” you said looking at him.

He just smiled cheekily. You just shook your head.

“Alright, lets get building,” Chris said rubbing his hands together.

“You sure you didn’t bring this so you could build it yourself?” You asked.

“Excuse me?! I’m helping you build it,” he said and mocked offense.

“Sure,” you said sarcastically and taking out the instruction book.

Chris rolled his eyes. He knows for a fact that he’ll come back tomorrow to visit you.

“What’s your favorite movie?” Chris asked.

“Iron Man 3,” you said opening bag one on the table.

“I know Iron Man,” he announced.

“Are you trying to impress me? Like I don’t get it. I don’t even understand why you’re here and why you’re in the bed across from me or why you’re trying to get to know me by asking questions,” you said. “Don’t you have something better to do instead of spending time with a stupid ass foster kid that nobody wants?”

“First of all, you aren’t stupid. You’re smarter than you think you are. Secondly, I want to spend time with you. I want to get to know you,” Chris said.

“No, you don’t. You just feel bad for me,” you said.

“Honestly, yeah, I do feel bad—,” he said.

“Get out,” you said without hesitation.

“Let me finish,” Chris said.

“No! Get out!” You yelled pushing the legos off the table. “I don’t need you! I don’t need your fucking pity!”

“Y/n,” Chris said.

“GET OUT!” You screamed.

He sighs and slides off the bed. He grabs his shoes and quickly puts them on.

“GET OUT!” You yelled.

Chris finally leaves. Your jaw clenched tightly and tears streamed down your cheeks.

“Dude, you literally kicked out Captain America,” Andrew said shaking his head.

“Leave me alone!” You yelled.

~~~~~next day

Chris walks into the room with a fuzzy blanket, his iPad Pro, and a bag of snacks. The LEGO set is built and off to the side on the table. You’re so far in the bed on the edge that you might fall off. You’ve also been crying. Chris puts the things he brought on a chair except the giant fuzzy blanket. He covers you with the blanket. You looked at him with your eyes red and puffy.

“I told you to get out,” you said.

“That was yesterday,” Chris said grabbing the snacks and his iPad. “Today is a new day.”

He kicks off his shoes and puts the snacks in your lap. He gets into the bed. You try pushing him off. But he’s a 38 year old man. He plants himself right next to you laying on top of the blankets.

“I do feel bad. No kid should’ve seen another kid die or be shot, Y/n,” Chris said opening up his iPad. “I don’t know what else you’ve gone through but I know that it sucked for you and it’s unfair. You should be dealing with high school drama instead but you got dealt the wrong cards, kid. It’s not fair at all.”

He looks at you to find that you have this frustrated look on your face as tears streamed down your cheeks. He puts his arm around you and pulls you into his side. You bury your face into his side and shut your eyes closed tightly. You choked out a sob. His other arm wraps around you and he holds you tightly as you cry.

“You’re gonna be alright,” he said softly. “You’ll make it through all of this.”

You continued to cry and Chris did his best to soothe and console you. He honestly doesn’t know what he’s doing. He just knows he’s gotta protect you.

“Let’s watch a movie,” Chris said as you calmed down a bit.

“W-What movie?” You asked quietly.

“I was thinking Iron Man 1,” Chris said opening his iPad back up.

“You- you have it?” You asked with your eyes lighting up.

“Yup,” he said nodding.

He opened up the collection of movies he houses on the iPad. He scrolls through until he finds it. He taps on it and plays the movie. He looks to see that you’re already entranced. It brings a smile to his face and he turns his focus back on the screen.

The two of you crashed as the credits of Iron Man 2 rolled on the screen.

“Would it be alright if I adopted you?” Chris asked when you two woke up from your impromptu nap.

“Don’t be saying shit like that if you don’t mean it,” you said immediately sitting up and looking at the actor.

“I mean it, Y/n. You don’t have to be dealing with terrible foster parents or being homeless cause it’s better than the other places you’ve been. I got room in my house,” Chris said sitting up. “I got air conditioning.”

“You’re- you’re lying. You don’t want me,” you cried.

He wrapped his arms around you and held you close. You tried your hardest to fight against his hold but he doesn’t budge.

“When have I lied to you?” Chris asked as you cried into his shoulder. “Have I lied to you since we met?”

You shook your head no and he rubbed your back.

“Then I’m not lying now. I’d like to adopt you if you let me,” Chris said.

“O-Okay,” you sniffled.

Chris smiled and pressed a kiss to the top of your head.

~~~~few weeks later

You were first greeted by a very happy Dodger. He jumped on you which freaked you out and you tensed up looking at the dog warily.

“Dodger,” Chris said grabbing Dodger by his collar.

He gently pulls Dodger away and you went back outside. He looks over his shoulder to see you descend down the porch steps. He puts down your backpack that has all you have in it and he takes Dodger outside with him.

“Dodger is very excitable. He loves people,” Chris said sitting down beside you but giving enough space in between. “Sit, Dodger.”

Dodger sits down planting his ass on Chris’ foot. Chris chuckles and pets his furry friend. He makes sure that Dodger doesn’t do anything to you.

“You okay?” Chris asked looking at you.

You shrugged your shoulders and looked away. You sniffled and tried your hardest not to cry. Chris watches as you hold yourself with your arms wrapped around yourself.

“I- I don’t w-want to get attached to him or- or you,” you whimpered with your voice trembling.

Chris slides closer and wrapped his arms around you.

“It’s okay to get attached, Y/n,” Chris said.

“B-But everyone dies!” You exclaimed looking at him with tears streaming down your cheeks. “My parents died. My sister died. My adoptive parents died. Issac is dead! He died right in front of me. Everyone I get attached to dies, Chris. You’re just gonna be one of them.”

“Yeah, I know. I’m not immortal and neither is Dodger and neither are you. Death is inevitable and you’ve dealt with it a lot. The world hasn’t been kind to you,” he said running his fingers through your hair. “You’ve lost so many people and I’m not going anywhere anytime soon.”

“Y-you don’t know that,” you said.

“You’re right. I don’t but it would be a dick move on the world’s part,” Chris said.

You let out a small laugh as he pulled you into his side more. Your arms wrapped around his torso.

“C’mon, let’s go inside,” he said.

You nodded but you don’t move. He chuckles. He stays put for a little longer and holds you.

#chris evans x female reader #chris evans fluff #chris evans x y/n #chris evans oneshot #chris evans angst #chris evans x teen!reader #angst #ironman #iron man #marvel #chris evans fanfic #dad!chris evans x reader

[cuddlepilefics]

can you do a skz one where Chan is working hard for a comeback, doing a lot of writing, producing, ect. but then he gets a cold, (snz centered) but he refuses to take a break, so Felix has to force him to take a break. With lots of Chanlix fluff please. 🥺🥺 (p.s I LOVE your writing, you are quite talented, and just have a way with words. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ love you ❤️)

Thank you, this really means a lot to me considering that English isn’t my first language.

I alread wrote something similar. You can find it here.

It’s never this cold in Australia

 Fandom: Stray Kids

Sickie: Chan

Caregiver: Felix

 No one’s POV.:

Stray Kids would have another comeback soon, which left them with almost twice as much work as usual. Felix hated those times when they prepared for comebacks, not because he didn’t like to make new music, hell, he loved making new music, rather because Chan would always overdo it on himself and the younger could do nothing but watch the leader run himself into the ground. This time was no different and it had actually been a few days since any of the members had seen their leader apart from the dance practices they spent together. Not even Changbin and Jisung were allowed to stay in the studio with their hyung because after the songs were written and most lines were recorded, Chan had to edit them. Since the other two members of 3racha wouldn’t be able to help much with editing other than approving or disapproving, they were more of a distraction to the Aussie, so in hopes of not stressing him out more, they left him to work in peace. Maybe if there were no distractions, he’d finish faster and take the time to rest afterwards. However, assuming there were no distractions, was wishful thinking. There certainly still were distractions, the worst of them a headache that had started bothering Chan a few days ago. He wasn’t surprised at all, considering he slept even less than usual, spending day and night looking at his laptop screen. The Aussie was no stranger to headaches, often overworking himself. The only thing he was grateful for was that he hadn’t had a migraine yet like he always got them when he was too stressed and sleep-deprived.

As days passed, the headache wasn’t the only thing bothering him. After falling asleep in front of his laptop at the studio again, Chan woke up with a completely blocked nose. Unable to breathe through it in the slightest. The pain had shifted right between his brows, causing his eyes to water. The light coming from the screen in front of him didn’t help either and after saving all his open files, he closed the laptop. Feeling more exhausted than he had in a while, he dropped his head onto the desk and closed his eyes again. If he had the energy, he’d move to the couch at the back of the studio and allow himself a small nap. Not longer than an hour though because he couldn’t afford losing the time he needed to finish everything before their deadlines. He had slept just fine in his chair earlier but now it didn’t work anymore, leaving the Aussie to just sit with his eyes closed, head on his arms, as he started overthinking. Sure, the headache could be caused by exhaustion but now his nose was stuffed up and he felt so cold. If he could, he’d get up and adjust the air conditioning but getting up sounded way too tiring. Though Chan didn’t want to admit it to himself, he could tell he was coming down with something and the thought of getting sick stressed him out. What if he wouldn’t be able to meet the deadlines? No! He could! He had worked through illnesses quite a few times before, so why shouldn’t he manage to do that now?

He didn’t know how much time had passed but his phone started to buzz with a reminder that he had to be at the practice room within the next ten minutes. Groaning at the thought of having to move around and music blearing loudly, Chan forced himself up and tried to remind himself of the positive things. Maybe dancing would help warm him up and he wouldn’t feel so cold afterwards. Stumbling to the door of his studio, the Aussie braced himself against the door frame and drew in a shaky breath. His nose tingled, causing his eyes to water before he ducked into the crook of his elbow with a rough sounding sneeze. Chan cleared his throat, wincing at how raw it felt, and used his sleeve to dab away the irritated tears that had spilled from his eyes. Trying to pull himself together, he made his way to the practice room and occasionally rubbed his arms to generate warmth. His previously blocked nose had started to run and he sniffled lightly before pushing the door open and cringing at the bright ceiling lights. Most of his dongsaengs were already there, stretching or going over short sequences of the choreography that they didn’t feel confident in yet. “Hyung!”, Jisung yelled, jogging over and hugging the leader, “Guys, he’s alive! Hyung, I didn’t think we’d get to see you anymore.” Chan barely noticeably flinched at the rapper’s loud voice and hesitantly hugged back, grateful for some warmth.

After some more teasing about not having seen the oldest in ages, they moved on to practicing but it didn’t go too well for Chan. Just standing upright already made him feel lightheaded, so it wasn’t much of a surprise that the fast step sequences caused the oldest to stumble frequently. His head was thumping with the same beat blasting from the speakers as Chan braced himself on his knees panting. It was only now that he noticed how difficult it was to breathe through a nose that was stuffed up and somehow runny at the same time. The dancing also hadn’t done much to warm him up like he had hoped it would. Usually he’d dance in a t-shirt only but today, he wore a sweater over his t-shirt, not even taking it off after one hour of dancing when all of the members were drenched in sweat. To be fair, he was drenched in sweat too but at the same time, he still felt cold. Seeing how out of breath their oldest was, Minho announced they’d have a ten-minute break to drink something and catch their breaths. They all knew Chan didn’t like to be called out when he wasn’t doing as well as usual, so the others just went to drink something and chat with each other, while Felix made his way over to his fellow Aussie, lowly asking: “Hey, you alright there? You’re looking pretty tired.” – “I am, both. Just haven’t been sleeping much”, the older replied quietly, letting out a shaky breath as he sat down next to his bag. Uncapping his water bottle, he struggled it really drink something because he couldn’t breathe while there was water in his mouth.

Chan put his bottle back into his bag and closed his eyes, massaging the bridge of his nose, willing the headache away. “What are your plans for the rest of the day?”, Felix hummed, sitting down next to his friend. The leader shrugged, sniffling: “Jus’ goin’ back to the studio. There’s so much I still need to finish and I don’t nearly have the time to.” The younger hummed in acknowledgement, not pointing out how miserable the other sounded. Felix could tell Chan was sick, the fact that he never took off his sweater being a dead giveaway, the slight rasp and congestion present in his voice only a confirmation. There was something else the dancer knew, the older wouldn’t do anything different from when he was healthy, he’d still work as long and as hard. This was one of the things he hated the most, watching his friend suffer but not being able to help because Chan didn’t want help. Help in this case would mean standing between him and his work and the leader would never tolerate that. Right now, it almost looked like he was dozing of against the wall and Minho felt guilty as he had to call them back to practicing. Felix got up first, reaching out both hands to pull Chan up, smiling sympathetically: “You sure you’re up for more dancing?” – “Lix, come on. I’m fine, really. We nee- ne - we need hESH! *sniff* we need to get this perfect”, the leader replied with a watery smile, that Felix could tell was entirely fake.

He also could tell that Chan was really frustrated with himself. Most of the group already had the dance moves down, the only one still struggling was their leader. They knew the sole reason for his difficulty with the choreography was that he wasn’t feeling well, whether that meant he was sick like Felix claimed or just sleep-deprived from all the hours he had worked through the night. Since they had mastered the dance and knew Chan would master it too when he was feeling better, Minho and Hyunjin, who were in charge of their practice session, called it a day. They convinced Chan that it was only scheduled for two hours and that they had different schedules now. It wasn’t entirely true but they were certain the oldest would end up either hurting himself or fainting if he kept dancing. After their practice was officially over, the group dispersed and practiced the things they wanted to improve for their comeback, singing, rapping or secretly returning to the practice room after Chan went back to his studio. Felix had tried to convince him to come back to the dorm, to take a warm shower and eat a proper meal but the older was stubborn, almost getting mad at the boy who only tried to help him. It wasn’t like the leader didn’t want to take a warm shower to get rid of the sweat and the chill that had settled bone-achingly deep but he was already stressed enough as it was and he knew it would only get more stressful if he wasted time that could better be spent working.

At this point, Felix knew he wouldn’t achieve anything by pestering the older. He’d only make him angry and cause him to hole himself up inside the studio even more, so he relented and watched with a heavy heart as the leader shuffled back to the studio. From around the corner, he heard two painful sounding sneezes and sadly shook his head, walking off into the opposite direction. If he couldn’t get Chan to come home with him, he’d at least get him a fresh t-shirt and hoodie because if the older wasn’t already sick, he’d certainly be after sitting in a room with air conditioning, wearing his sweat-through practice clothes. Unsure about the last time the leader had a decent meal, Felix also took the time to make some soup, pouring it into a thermos and packing a bowl and spoon, so his hyung could eat it at the studio. He grabbed a big sports bag and filled it with fresh clothes, the soup and a thick scarf the older had bought him during the first winter Felix experienced in Korea. Shortly before leaving the dorm again, he remembered to also shove a travel pack of tissues into the bag. If only Chan would take better care of himself.

The leader sat in front of his laptop, suppressing the urge to cry as the screen blurred in front of him. By now, one of his sleeves was constantly pressed against his nose, either to rub at it as he sniffled quietly or to keep him from sneezing all over his keyboard. He couldn’t tell when exactly his nose had gotten so sensitive but it only took as much as one slightly too forceful breath to make it start tickling again, which in turn would make his eyes water more and cause him to see even less of the screen in front of him, yet Chan refused to admit that his attempts of getting something done were unsuccessful. The leader pulled both of his sleeves over his palms to rub at his itchy face, sighing in frustration. His breath started to hitch again and giving into the feeling this time, he simply kept his sleeves over his face, waiting. "h-hESSH! hISH’iew!” He sniffled carefully before he dared to remove his hands, instead swiping his sleeves under his eyes to dry them. When did he start feeling this bad? Sure, he had started to feel this cold coming on earlier, yet he never thought it would cause him more than some congestion. Blinking at his screen, his eyes instantly started to water again, still, he tried to work through it, determined he wouldn’t let a cold keep him from meeting his deadlines.

Chan had taken off his shoes after some time, pulling his legs closer to his body as he curled up in his chair, trying to stay warm. He had already adjusted the air conditioning when he came back to the studio but it didn’t help much. By the time Felix arrived to the studio, it seemed like the leader was staring through his laptop screen rather than at it. He also didn’t notice the younger’s arrival, startling when Felix appeared next to him. The dancer heard him mumble something incoherent, not understanding a word but frowning at how out of it the older was. “Sorry, what was that?”, he hummed, resting a hand on Chan’s shoulder. The leader cleared his throat before repeating: “I said, ‘s never this cold in Australia.” The younger was stunned, to him it felt pretty toasty in the small studio after the air conditioning had been completely turned off. Worriedly he pressed his palm against his hyung’s forehead, causing the older to shudder. He clicked his tongue, stating: “Well, I can tell you why you feel cold. You’re feverish, which I’m pretty sure you knew already.” – “I-I hhh… hh’HDJsHhiew!” – “Mhm, exactly my point. You’re sick and should come home to rest”, Felix emphasized. That seemed to wake Chan. The drowsy fog in his head disappeared as his eyes finally focused on his dongsaeng, arguing: “I can’t. There’s still so much to do, I’m not going to finish this on time. God, I’m already so behind with everything. The comeback is too soon. If I don’t at least finish another three songs tonight, it’ll be a disaster.”

Sighing, Felix turned his chair away from his laptop, so it was facing him instead. “Hyung, it won’t. I know it’s already great as it is and Stay will agree with me. There’s still enough time till the comeback and Binnie-hyung and Sungie can help you. Besides, I don’t think you’re going to get much done with a fever like this”, he tried to reason. Face hardening, Chan got out of his chair, voice raised: “How would you know if the time is enough? You have no idea how many more songs I still have to edit. Those people won’t be Stay anymore if I can’t give him the music they are expecting from us. I could get stuff done tonight if you weren’t distracting me from it!” Voice cracking and giving out towards the end, the leader dropped back into his chair. Tears spilled down his cheeks as he mumbled apologies over and over again. He had never meant to snap at the younger like this and he’d also never raised his voice at Felix like this. Biting his lip, Felix pulled himself out of his dazed stupor. Chan’s outburst had been unexpected but he was sure the older didn’t mean it, so he forced down his shaken-up emotions and embraced the other, who quietly hiccupped, wiping at his eyes.

“Ssh, you’re okay. It’s okay, hyung. Everything’s just a bit too much right now, hm?”, he whispered, running his hand through the other’s disheveled curls. Chan nodded with a wet sniffle, trying to fight back the tears that just continued coming. His bottled-up stress and frustration now bubbling over. Pulling him to his feet, Felix guided the older over to the couch and sat down with him after quickly retrieving the bag he had brought. He pulled out the tissues and handed them to Chan, who messily wiped his cheeks before blowing his nose, irritating it again. “hISH’iew!” – “Bless you”, the dancer hummed, handing him another tissue as the first was already soggy. He kept rubbing his friend’s back, hugging him from time to time as he waited for the older to cry his emotions off of his chest. It took almost twenty minutes for Chan to calm himself down again. He didn’t even know why he was so upset, mainly feeling emotional and sensitive from his fever. Seeing he was still shivering slightly, Felix pulled out the scarf he had brought with him and laid it across the leader’s shoulders before rubbing his arms up and down. The older closed his eyes and leaned against the back of the couch, clearing his throat repeatedly. “Does your throat hurt too?”, the younger asked quietly. Chan shook his head, rasping: “’s jus’ dry from breathing through my mouth.” – “Oh, have some water then”, Felix instructed, handing him the bottle from his desk. He didn’t fully believe his hyung, so he was going to find out the truth differently. Of course, Chan’s wince didn’t go unnoticed as it was obvious swallowing hurt him.

Rolling his eyes at the leader’s stubbornness, Felix handed him the fresh clothes. It took some prodding because Chan was feeling way too cold to take off the shirt he was wearing but he felt much more comfortable in his clean hoodie afterwards. The younger was now wrapping the scarf around his neck to protect his already strained voice from further harm, while Chan was already dozing off in his sitting position. Gently nudging his arm, Felix reminded: “Come on, we still need to go home before you sleep. Did you eat already?” The leader shook his head. “You can either eat a late dinner back at the dorm or I brought you some soup. You could eat here and then go straight to bed when we get back”, he offered. This time Chan nodded. Furrowing his brows, the younger asked: “Yes to which option?” – “Straight to bed”, Chan muttered, barely staying awake. Felix quickly took out the soup he had prepared, glad when he found it still steaming, and agreed: “You can you straight to bed but please eat this first. You can’t run on protein shakes, granola bars and coffee the entire time.” – “That works pretty well”, the older argued, blowing onto the spoon. The dancer rolled his eyes, muttering: “Well, that’s debatable.” They sat in silence, apart from Chan’s soft sniffles, as the leader ate the first warm meal he had had in a week. He didn’t want to admit it but the soup felt nice, warming his sore throat and his entire body from the inside. Plus, His dongsaeng certainly wasn’t a bad cook, at least not as far as he could taste with his nose blocked.

Felix packed up the things he had brought, while Chan saved his files and slid his laptop into his backpack, ready to let the younger take him home. Although the thought of leaving the building into the night didn’t seem too appealing, the leader reminded himself of the warm bed waiting for him at the dorm. A bit lightheaded still, he relied fully on Felix’ arm around his waist, guiding him home as his eyes fought to stay open. He got even more unsteady as his breath hitched and he gripped onto the younger’s shoulder for support. The dancer slowed down even more, steadying his hyung as he brought up his arm sneezing into the crook of his arm twice, almost toppling over. “Bless you. We’re almost there”, Felix promised, dragging a sniffly Chan down another block towards their dorm building. The leader looked dead on his feet as the light in the entrance hall of the building illuminated his face. The younger wince as he grasped just how much the older’s condition had declined since their practice in the afternoon. Quietly whimpering, Chan pulled his hood further over his face to block out the uncomfortably bright light that made his eyes burn and head pound. After what seemed like a whole journey, they made it up to their dorm, kicking off their shoes. As promised, Felix walked the leader straight to his room where all the older did was changing into thicker sweatpants before curling up under his blanket. Felix left the room for a few minutes and returned with some water and medicine, whispering: “Since you ate something earlier, you can take something for your fever and headache now. I’ll leave the water on your nightstand in case you get thirsty or your throat bothers you during the night.” With a grateful but hoarse hum, Chan took the medicine before curling up again and burying his face in his blanket. "hESH! *sniff*” – “Bless you. Do you want cuddles?”, the younger offered. Shaking his head, the older replied pitifully: “Don’t want to get you sick too.” – “I didn’t ask you if you wanted to get me sick, I asked if you wanted cuddles”, Felix chuckled. Letting out a shaky laugh, Chan admitted: “I-I guess I do.” – “Alright, scoot over. Don’t worry if you still feel cold, you’ll get your very personal Australian sun.”

[pretend-writer]

Paranoid (Supernatural x The Umbrella Academy

Crossover

Summary: Things go wild when Y/N Winchester and Diego Hargreeves tries to make an announcement for their families. 

Pairing: Winchester x sister!reader, Diego Hargreeves x reader

Title Reference: Paranoid x Jonas Brothers

Word Count: 1.6k words

Warning: mention of the dead, mention of violence, swearing

✤  ·  ✤  ·  ✤  ·  ✤  ·  ✤

It was a small tradition that we'd all gather together and have dinner at the Hargreeve's mansion. Allison, Vanya, Sam and I would all cook together, usually something different every time just to see if the others would like the food.

Ever since Diego and I have started dating, Dean and Sam had sort of used this dinner idea to watch us. "I need to keep an eye on this boy" is what Dean would usually say, even though he wouldn't even see him the other times I'm alone with him. Didn't see the full logic in that but I guess it made him feel somewhat safe.

The Winchesters having dinner with The Hargreeves was always merry and cheerful. Everyone had smiles on their faces, enjoying the food and the company.

We'd usually share stories of what happened; Dean, Sam and I would talk about our hunts. The Hargreeves would talk about which take downs they had, usually bragging about who had the most arrests within the week.

Everytime this topic had been brought up, we would say that we needed to collaborate and work together. Diego, Five and Vanya had joined us on hunts every now and then. The rest were too chicken to face the monsters in the real world.

This time however, these fun talks didn't happen. The dinner table instead felt intense; Dean wouldn't stop staring at Diego, Sam was upset his dish didn't turn out better than he expected. Vanya had not slept at all practicing on her violin, Allison stayed up all night learning the recipe for today and perfecting it.

Everyone was just in a terrible mood and now with all the grouchiness, I wasn't able to deliver the news that I was hoping to tell everyone at the dinner table.

I was already nervous enough to say I was pregnant, with everyone in a bad mood I don't even know what to add to make my announcement even merrier. Well, I doubt nothing would make it better; I just knew everyone was going to freak out, especially my brothers.

Dean eyed me as I played with my food, biting his bottom lip and observed me like he always did when I was with Diego. 'You barely ate your food, 'Y/N.'

'Uh, yeah sorry.' I answered quickly trying to force myself to look unsuspicious. 'Just not really hungry.'

'Can I have your plate then?' Luther asked with his mouth full, pointing at my dinner.

'Knock yourself out.' He snatched the plate that was in front of me, digging into it as if he hadn't eaten for days.

Five cocked his head, I swear he had mind-reading powers too because he was always up to something. 'Diego, you're quiet as well.'

'Just enjoying my meal.' Diego smiled with the fork still in his mouth.

Sam looked to his left then right, 'What's going on? Am I missing something?'

'I'm just tired, I don't know about the rest of you guys.' Vanya yawned, slowly eating her food.

'Same, actua-'

'No way!' Klaus screamed interrupting me as I was about to talk to Vanya. He talked and blabbed a lot but I haven't heard him talk so loudly until now. 'You're kidding me right?'

Five sighed, 'Didn't we tell you to stop bringing your dead friends to the dinner table?'

'No, no, no, no, no. This isn't just some random friend. It's Ben!'

Everyone groaned at the same time, tired of hearing Klaus bringing Ben up whenever it was convenient for him. During important hunt meetings, he would cast him out of the group. Whenever Klaus had excuses, he loved using his brother's name to pin him for whatever that was happening at the time.

Of course Ben couldn't even defend himself. Poor boy.

'I know, I know. I sound like I'm lying right now but I PROMISE I'm not.' Klaus whined, trying to convince us that he was telling the truth.

'I'm tired of hearing your bullcrap Klaus. I can't even imagine what Ben has to hear from you every time you're not around us.' Luther commented.

'You guys would want to hear this though! Oh, please please please.'

'What is it about?' Allison questioned Klaus.

Dean shook his head, 'Really Allison? Why did you encourage him?'

'Oh, Dean. You would definitely want to hear this.'

Five rolled his eyes and sighed, not even questioning his brother. Klaus kept on yapping about how he wanted to tell us this huge gossip that he heard from Ben.

'Why don't you just get to the point then, Klaus?' Diego finally said what everyone else was thinking.

'Are you sure you want me to tell them about your business?' Klaus grinned, clearly enjoying this "big secret" he had.

Diego shrugged, 'I don't really have anything to hide. I love you brother, but I doubt you know anything about my personal life.'

'Okay then.' Klaus cleared his throat, standing from his seat with a huge grin on his face. 'Y/N is pregnant.'

Dean spat water from his mouth, covering it as some landed on my forehead since I sat across from him. Sam made a face, staring at me to see my reaction.

'That's the dumbest lie I've heard.' Luther laughed, 'Wasn't even close to getting me. Nice try though.'

'Seriously, Klaus. At least make us laugh.' Five snickered and continuing to eat his food, unbothered. 'Are you two not even going to defend yourselves?'

'Ah.' I bit my lip, embarrassed that Klaus had to announce my big news in front of everyone. My brother's reaction said it all, they didn't even know what he said was true.

'Surprise?' Diego blushed, scratching his head as he tried to hide his embarrassment.

We were already nervous to bring our pregnancy to our family, Klaus suddenly blurting it our in front of everyone had made things worse than expected.

Sam looked at me, then back to Diego. 'Wait, wait, wait. Pr-Pregnant? Am I- Are you-'

My brother was practically panicking; Not going to lie, although I was afraid of their reaction, the way Sam's eyes wandered around like a lost puppy was cute.

Dean on the other hand was at loss of words. His usual angry reaction was what I expected and seeing him not do or say anything at all sort of scared me.

'I'll be an aunt!' Allison cheered, jumping up and down her seat. 'Is it going to be a boy? Oh I hope it's a girl.'

'Have you thought of names yet!?' Vanya smiled, joining Allison. 'Wait? You think the kid will turn out to have superpowers? Oh wow.'

'Diego you may want to run.' I murmured, watching Dean not move a muscle. Being too focused on my oldest brother's reaction, I blocked out whatever Allison and Vanya was discussing on he side.

'Ah, Ben. You little shit.' Diego talked under his breath, burying his head in his arms as he felt Dean's glare.

Klaus spoke nervously, 'Aha. Ben says sorry but blames me for how I went on about it.'

Luther tapped on his shoulder, 'You're not helping at all. I mean, look at Diego. He's shaking like a chihuahua.'

'Someone please make it make sense.' Sam places his hand on his forehead. 'Y/N. How did it happen?'

'Well, Diego and Y/N obviously had se-'

'Don't even finish that sentence, little kid.' Dean cut Five off, 'Y/N. I don't even know what to say but what the fuck?'

'I wanted to tell you guys tonight the proper way but you guys seemed so intense, I didn't know how to start this news.'

Sam lightly smiled, despite the panic I still saw through his eyes. 'Y/N, you and Diego have been dating for about six years now. I'm happy that you found someone other than your brothers that loves you so much.'

'No, no.' Dean crossed his arms, he was the total opposite of how Sam was acting. It hurt my heart a little that my brother was acting the way he did but there was nothing that I could've done.

The room went to silence, everyone staring at me and Dean as we all waited for him to say something else. It was odd to see Dean say a few words when he was pissed, which frightened me more.

He continued to stare at me intensely, taking a deep breath and taking in the little detail that he got from Klaus' announcement.

I wished that Diego and I had told everyone instead, otherwise this awkward moment between my brothers and me wouldn't have happened. Or at least could've been slightly better.

Dean shifted his eyes to Diego, I practically heard my boyfriend gulping from right next to me. Him and Sam freaked out when I've told him we started dating, Diego couldn't imagine what was going on in Dean's head.

'You were my little sister that always needed me, a little nut that never left my side. Now you're all grown up, about to start your own family.' Dean unexpectedly started to tear up, sniffling quietly. 'You just grew up so fast, Y/N.'

'Dean..' I reached over the table, grabbed his hand and squeezed it. 'I'll always need you. I'll need you and Sam. You'll always be my brother and I'll always be your little sister.'

'That is so cute.' Klaus smiled. 'See, Ben? I told you blabbing this would've not been so bad.'

'Oh, nah. This is bad.' Diego looked at his brother. 'You really thought it was a good ide-'

Luther hugged Diego from the side, 'Congrats brother! Wow. I'm going to be an uncle.'

'Now we have to celebrate! Let's go clubbing!' Allison got up, walking towards me as she pulled me from my seat.

'Oh no. That's a huge no.' Sam shook his head, 'Last time we went, Diego was practically eye humping my sister. No.'

Five laughed, 'That's why she's pregnant. Duh.'

Dean quickly turned his head, 'Really!? Did you really have to engrave that image in my head?'

'That's for calling me a little kid, old man.'

'You're the one to talk! Future boy.'

#winchester sister!reader #dean winchester x sister!reader #sam winchester x sister!reader #winsister #supernatural fic #the umbrella academy fic #diego hargreeves x reader #tua fic #spn fic #diego hargreeves fic

[subbing-for-clones]

She Who Walks the Line Between Part 3

Maul x GreyJedi!Reader

Word Count: 2682

WARNINGS: blood, fluffy fluff starts picking up

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       The few hours of sleep he was able to achieve were filled with nightmares that consisted of his memories returning. His life played out behind his eyelids charging his sadness, terror and his fury. Yet before his mind could plummet to unreachable depths, he sensed a calming presence in the back of his mind. A hand that reached out for him to hold onto. He had no idea that during his rest he became quite vocal and Y/N stood in his doorway using the force to ease him back into a relaxed state. Pulling him further away from the unseen dangers that threatened to pull him down and drown him.

    He woke with a start, not remembering where he was. His first thought was why it didn’t smell like fire and burning fuels mixed with humid gasses. When he felt his legs shift under the blankets the events that took place yesterday flooded back to the forefront of his memory. He smelled the sweet sugary aroma of a plate towering with baked apples and honeyed meat sitting on his night stand but before he indulged his groaning stomach, movement from outside the window caught his eye. It was his savior.

    Not covered in the same make of dress she wore yesterday. Today she adorned a fitted white cloth binding across her chest and beige trousers that bagged around her thighs but were tight just below her knees. Barefooted, she dual wielded white lightsabers in the Ataru style. Dodging quickly and lunging aggressively toward an invisible attacker. Gracefully she connected the two sabers so they appeared to be a single double sided weapon. Twirling them so quickly and dancing on her feet so lightly his eyes had trouble keeping up. She was working through forms he both recognized and ones he had never seen before. He could see a light glimmer of sweat slicked across her form catching in the early morning sunlight. She must have been training for hours already. Strands of hair falling out of the bun she had tied up to keep the majority of her locks out of her eyeline.

    He took and ate the breakfast she prepared slowly, studying her through the glass with admiration. Obviously satisfied with her efforts she hung her now sheathed sabers from the gate and tended the goats and chickens within the pen. Despite her hostile training they were calm and trotted up to her as she passed through the gate. He watched her feed the animals and her mouth form words he couldn't hear, assuming they were praises as they danced around her.

 ~~~~~

      The next two weeks were more of the same every day. You meditated and trained in the mornings before tending to your animals. You knew his eyes were on you while he ate the food you always left for him, always watching. You feigned ignorance and never mentioned that you caught him staring, surprising yourself with the fact that you kind of liked the attention. When you had finished your morning routine you would find him dressed in his room practicing the basic movements and exercises you assigned to him for his physical therapy. Satisfied he was actually doing them you would go shower and dressing in your usual slitted dresses that you preferred.

    You would eat again together and continue helping him work his legs. After the first few days he joined you in your afternoon meditation followed by more exercises or flipping through one of your many books, light music always on in the background. The longer he was in your care the softer his eyes looked, the stronger his legs got and he came to be more comfortable in your proximity. You had both gotten used to one another's company. You had spent so much time alone on this planet you had forgotten what it was like to have a companion. A rather agreeable one at that. It was nice.

 ~~~~~

      Now able to walk on his own with only the help from a cane he joined Y/N outside every morning. Still unable to train as she did, he practiced walking around the pen surrounded by the animals. He could see a smile grace her lips when he interacted gently with them. When she had finished, she strode over to him leaning up against the fence with her arms crossed and her brows furrowed.

"What is it?" He asked, honey eyes filled with concern that he had upset her somehow. He tended to revert back to the frightened apprentice she realized he had been at one point in his life if she wasn’t careful. Despite the fact that he had never one been the cause of even a slight frustration within her.

"I have to leave for a day or two, stock up on some things this planet doesn't have. I need you to stay here, I fear a storm is coming and I don't want to leave the animals unattended. Would you be alright with that?”

Sighing with relief he agreed and watched as she boarded her ship and took off.

      The next day after she had left, he must have looked up to the sky every hour impatiently waiting for her to return. He ate much less without her, swearing to himself that it didn't taste as good if it didn't come from her hands. He did however keep up with his exercises and spent much of his free time with the goats and chickens. That night he had even more trouble falling asleep than he usually did; missing her company. After tossing and turning until daybreak he made a daring move, striding toward Y/N's room without his cane for the first time.

    He had never been inside of it but he had caught glances after noticing she had been sleeping with her door open, starting a few days after his arrival. Sheer white curtains hung in front of the transparasteel panes that overlooked the garden. Like the rest of the house, not a single chronometer in sight. The need to keep time didn't really exist in this place, he enjoyed that small detail over the past few weeks. It was starkly different from how he was raised, every moment of every day planned down to the second. Even a slight deviation always resulting with a beating. He had to keep reminding himself that she was not his master. When he did forget she would always lend a kind reminder she was master of nothing and no one.

    The pine-colored rug under foot was exceptionally plush and extended across most of the floor, the polished dark wooden flooring peeking out only around the edges of the room. A long desk was situated beneath the large viewport. Atop it lay several data-tapes and empty books. She must be copying the information by hand he assessed. Actual paper writing was extremely rare and her home was filled with paper sheeted books bound in various leathers. One of the books sat open with a pen resting on it, the entry was short but he loved seeing her handwriting nonetheless. Without lifting the journal, he stood and read the page entry, curiosity getting the better of him.

Maul- Day 17:

‘He is recovering faster than I had originally anticipated but I am also not surprised. He has to be strong to have survived as long as he did on his own in the condition he came to me in. Already walking on his own supported only by a cane by day 10. He is gaining weight slowly but is starting to look healthier. He will snap back quickly once he can walk on his own again, unaided by a crutch. His eyes aren’t nearly as blood shot and the lighter shade of color in his horns and nails indicates he is getting proper nutrients and that his hormones have balanced out.

His mind seems to be healing as well, I haven't asked about his memories but I know they come in the form of nightmares. He responds well to my attempts to calm him in his sleep. They still come every night but he has gone from an excessive number of fits to only two or three a night. He is still wildly unbalanced but the scale is starting to tip in the right direction. I have come to realize that I enjoy his presence. He seems to be more comfortable with small talk. I like his voice, alas my mind wanders.’

    Maul hobbled over to her bed and hesitantly laid down on top of it not daring to mess up the bedding too much. Several realizations crossing his mind. One, she had actually come to care for him as he was starting to care for her. Two, he learned why she slept with her door open now. His hearts raced at the thought of her standing in his doorway calming him while he slept. Three, she liked his voice. He had always been scolded if he spoke unnecessarily, taught to be silent as shadows. But she liked his voice. He could smell her on her pillows, a sweet earthy scent that lingered in his nose. Very quickly sleep took him.

    He awoke that evening as the sun was starting to set to the sound of thunder ripping through the sky. His belly growled, he had grown accustomed to several meals a day and his hunger had caught up to him. Being sure to straighten out the blankets on her bed he stood and made his way to the kitchen. Opening the cooler for the first time, he found a plate with a large cooked steak and a note.

‘You had better eat this before I return. You have to eat even if I'm not there. -Y/N’

    He smiled at her sentiment. As usual with everything she made, it was like ambrosia in his mouth. The moment he finished eating he sensed the animals were distressed. Not bringing his cane he made his way slowly outside to the barn. The rain came down almost violently, lightning streaking across the now black sky while thunder crashed angrily.

    He was soaking wet by the time he got inside to check the animals who were immediately calmed when they saw him. Sighing he sat in the middle of the floor and began his meditation to stave away his and their anxiety of the storm. He had hoped she wasn't flying in this but she was already away longer than she said she'd be. That didn't help the knot of worry growing in his belly.

 ~~~~~

      When you came out of hyperspace and entered the atmosphere you realized you must have put the coordinates in a digit off. You were on the wrong side of the planet, jungle stretched out as far as you could see. This wouldn’t be the first time you had accidently come home in the wrong hemisphere. You sighed at your own antics. It was too dangerous to fly back out to space so you had to navigate through the storm down here. Your ship seemed to attract the lightning but you managed to sense it a split second before it struck, narrowly dodging the persistent bolts. Before long you could just make out the break that gave way to the grasslands. You started lowering out of the sky but were distracted to see Maul coming out of the barn. It was just a moment of distraction but an important moment, you didn't sense the lightning. You were struck and it killed the power sending you nose first straight into the soil with a loud crash. Your vision blacked out after hitting your head on impact knocking you unconscious.

 ~~~~~

 No...NO... fuck.

Maul watched as the bolt hit her ship and she crashed out in the field. Eyes wide with panic he ran as fast as his new legs would carry, almost giving out several times before he reached the fallen ship. He raised his arms, using the force for the first time in weeks he opened the door and lowering the ramp. It didn't reach the ground due to the crafts hazardous angle. Force jumping inside he landed on his feet with a shocking pain that radiated through his torso. Snarling he made his way to the cockpit where he found her starting to wake up.

 ~~~~~

 You felt strong hands on your arms gently squeezing, you sighed into the touch rubbing your head and your eyes. When they finally opened the first thing you saw were two brightly glowing golden orbs. Rubbing your eyes again, your vision fully returning, you realized they belonged to a very worried looking Zabrack. Who was covered in...straw?

    Remembering what distracted you in the first place you burst into laughter. Hard, rolling laughter.

    The worry on his face shifted into confusion. He slowly wiped the blood off your temple from where you hit your head. Then he lifted you bridal style and started walking out of the ship. Finding a new reserve of strength and determination he carried you all the way to your home. Although you stopped laughing you still giggled, picking pieces of straw off the back of his tunic. Finally realizing what you found so amusing he smiled, "the storm scared the goats so I meditated with them. I ended up falling asleep out there."

    He now stood in the living room, still in his arms you replied, "I kind figured as much." You pressed your forehead to his for a moment, butterflies dancing in both of your stomachs. He set you down on the couch slowly and fetched a cool wet cloth. Tenderly, he dabbed at the cut. You watched him closely, a slight blush fanning across your cheeks. He was so soft, so careful in this moment, so near you, a stark comparison to the man who had first landed in your field not long ago.

    He heard your heartbeat quicken and saw your blush, causing his face to deepen slightly along with yours. Quickly he stood, rubbing a hand on the back of his neck looking anywhere but at you. "I think you'll be alright," he stammered. "It's just a shallow laceration."

    You also stood, inches from him. He was taller than you were, not by much, but it was noticeable when you were this close to his body. "I could've told you that but noooo you had to cast aside your cane and come to the rescue... Thank you." You batted your long eyelashes at him and he gulped, gaze not leaving your own this time.

"I have a present for you."

"You do?" He asked now distracted from your devilishly plump lips.

"Yeah, quick stop on Naboo, few broken necks, spines and bribes later aaaaaaand.." you reached behind your back unclipping a third lightsaber from your belt. Still rough where it had been sliced in half you presented it to him. "Tada!"

"You did this for me?" He asked slowly taking it in his hands. It seemed.. heavier than he remembered. But it was his.

"Yes I did,” you stated matter-o-factly. Now that your obviously strong enough not only to walk but to carry me across the field, like the damsel in distress that I was, covered in straw no less. We will start training together. But for now, I'm exhausted. It's the middle of the night and I've had a maker damned day." You took a chance and leaned up into him, pressing your lips against his cheekbone with your hands on his chest, holding them there for a few seconds you felt him go ridged.

    Turning on the ball of your foot you wandered back into your bedroom. "Goodnight Maul." You called without turning to see his reaction.

    He held the place on his cheek where your kiss landed just before, mind reeling and melting at the same time. "Goodnight Y/N," he murmured. Not leaving his spot.

#maul fluff #darth maul #star wars maul #maul x reader #jedi knight #sith warrior #star wars #grey jedi #star wars fluff #starwars au #x reader #starwars x reader #jedi reader #reader insert

[pendragyn]

Darkness and Light

This is an excerpt of my WIP Ineffable Bastards (the entirety of chapter 3 lol) that I felt really fits with the 'Dark' and 'Light' themes of this year's Good Omens Celebration.

(sorry for the formatting errors, tumblr being tumblr. adding a readmore since it's 4k words, also the real angst is below the cut. Hopefully it works! if not you can read it all at AO3)

Chapter 3: Tuesday ∞ Unbinding

A brief stab of pain jolted Crowley awake, and they froze for a moment to get their bearings. The shop was wreathed in deep shadows, lit only by the lamp by Aziraphale’s desk, and the only sounds were of Aziraphale working on the manuscript and a clock ticking faintly in the dimness. The back of their neck tingled with uneasiness.

Ignoring the sensation, Crowley eased upright and bit back a curse, too distracted by the ache in their back to notice the pale tartan blanket they’d been tucked under. Ugh, is this couch made of rocks? They prodded at the cushion, but it was as lofty as the day they had miracled it into being some thirty years earlier. At least, they assumed it was still only thirty year ago. Just how long did I sleep for?

As they could both go days without shifting a muscle, only knowing it was night wasn’t a particularly useful metric. Crowley had slept for the better part of a century after all, though that had been on purpose, while this... They checked their watch, but couldn’t seem to focus on the face so checked their phone’s time instead, and still had to squint and rub at their eyes before the time and date finally swam into focus. Midnight. Just hours, not days.

They stood and stretched to try to relieve the ache in their back, but if anything that only made it feel worse. While demons might not be able to instantly heal themselves the way angels could, they did heal at a far faster rate than humans did, and weren’t exactly prone to chronic back pain, or any pain at all, if injury wasn’t involved. It was becoming obvious that something was very wrong, but Crowley still hesitated to bring it up.

Haven’t I dragged them through enough? They turned to watch Aziraphale, highlighted in the darkness by the glow from the lamp. They were wearing their favourite old cardigan instead of their coat, which was as informally dressed as Crowley ever saw them in recent memory, and looked like nothing more than the contented bookshop keeper they played at being. They looked serene, happy even, and utterly enthralled by their project.

Just tell them about the spells and go,Crowley decided. “Aziraphale?”

“Hmm?”

“How long ‘til you’re done?”

“Just… there, finished. Perhaps we could go get dinner at the café while things dry?” Aziraphale suggested hopefully, looking up from the manuscript and blinking a few times when they saw how dark it was. “Oh, I was at that a while, wasn’t I? Dreadfully sorry.”

Crowley shook their head at the apology. “It’s after midnight.”

“Oh, they’re long closed then. Well. Perhaps another time.” There was something in Crowley’s expression that made a lump of dread form in the bottom of Aziraphale’s stomach. They dragged their eyes away to focus on putting things away, not wanting to waste any of the precious materials through carelessness, while a million things clamoured in their mind to be said. It felt like everything was going wrong again and they hurried to fill the silence. “I do hope I did right in not waking you earlier? You seemed quite exhausted and…” I didn’t want you to go. Aziraphale swallowed the words down and gave Crowley a smile. “I do have to concede that you were right about today, well yesterday now, I suppose. It did turn out to be a rather good day after all.”

Crowley blinked, taken a little off guard by the admission, and tried to figure out how to broach the subject of the alarms. “Oh, er, yeah? I mean, yeah, it was good. But I, er-”

Aziraphale ploughed on, almost afraid to know what Crowley was going to say. “Having my hands occupied helps ground me, I’ve found, helps me sort through things that otherwise seem too big a mess. Not that we’re out of this mess, I know, but taking the time to let things settle really helps me put things into perspective. I just need a little breathing room sometimes and-”

“And alarms.”

Aziraphale looked up in confusion. “Alarms?”

“I mean, I, uh, I set up some alarms around the shop while you were working, to warn you, us, of intruders. Passive alarms,” Crowley hastened to assure the angel when they frowned, “nothing dangerous. Just… You know, in case.”

Aziraphale was momentarily at a loss for words. They felt it would be inexcusably rude to ask what had motivated Crowley to do such a thing, though that was the second thought that came to mind. First was just how nice kind an act it was. “I… that is, well, that, that was very kind of you. I hadn’t even considered, but I suppose it is best to be prepared for retaliation of some sort. But you… you’ll have to at least let me treat you to dinner to repay-”

“No.” Aziraphale’s face fell at the blunt denial but Crowley explained, “I mean it’s too late. Now. Tonight. But…” Crowley hesitated. Although things hadn’t gone the way they hadn’t even let themself admit to hoping for, they knew Aziraphale would want to help them if they needed it. Another sharp stab of pain decided them. Whatever they were dealing with, they had to deal with it soon, and the shop was not secure enough in it’s current state. “How would you feel about going to the flat? I’ve got plenty to tide us over and, I, uh, I’ve got something I need your opinion on.”

“Certainly.” Aziraphale quickly stood up and grabbed their coat, but made a token protest, wanting to give Crowley an out of their clearly impulsive offer. “But I wouldn’t want to impose-”

“’Snever an imposition, Aziraphale, to share a meal with you,” Crowley murmured, moving towards the door when Aziraphale looked up in surprise at their serious tone. “’Sides, you’ve been slouched at that desk too long.”

Aziraphale trailed along behind them and tried to puzzle out what was really going on. “As long as you’re quite sure, Crowley.”

“Always.” Crowley could see Aziraphale’s confusion but ignored it, slipping into the driver’s seat and clasping very tightly to the wheel while the angel got in the passenger’s side. The ache was getting worse and a headache was beginning to pound behind their eyes. Unsure what else to do, Crowley sped off towards the safety of the flat.

Aziraphale watched Crowley with a small frown of concern, but could tell from their expression that they weren’t in the mood to answer questions. As it was, the strange foreboding itchy ache in their back was distraction enough, and when a surreptitious healing failed to alleviate the sensation, a worrying thought popped up. If this isn’t a physical injury, then it must be metaphysical in nature. Could this be from what we did? From what happened? Did I… could I have absorbed some of Crowley’s… demon-ness while borrowing their corporeal form? Or been poisoned by some remnant of the hellfire? Or from just being in Hell at all? But that means-

Aziraphale risked a glance at Crowley. The demon pressed back against the cushion and shifted uncomfortably in their seat, like there was an itch along their spine that couldn’t be reached. -Heaven or the holy water or my angel-ness contaminated,poisoned, Crowley in the same way. Oh, oh no. I didn’t even think to do more than a cursory cleansing before we switched back! What to do, what to do? They whirled through a dozen ideas but just as quickly discarded them all as unless, a knot of grief forming over their heart.

There must be something! But nothing came to mind. They wiped at their stinging eyes, refusing to let the tears fall and returned to twisting the golden ring on their pinky, before they were struck by an idea. Maybe I can fix this.

“Hey.”

Aziraphale jumped when Crowley spoke, quickly shoving their balled up fists into their coat pockets, and tried to smile reassuringly when Crowley frowned. “Sorry, what did you say?”

“Just wondering where you were. We’ve been parked for like five minutes.” Crowley tried to tease, to keep up appearances should anyone be observing, but the aching itch was making it almost impossible to think. Another stab of pain had Crowley pressing a hand to their throbbing tattoo with a hiss. When they pulled their hand away, there was a smear of blood on their fingers. Shit. Outta time.

Aziraphale’s heart dropped at the sight and they instantly reached out, but Crowley shook their head and shoved out of the car before they could attempt a healing. Aziraphale hurried after them, up to the flat, jumping a little when Crowley slammed the door shut behind them and set all the locks with a snap. “Crowley-”

Another jolt of pain sent Crowley reeling back against the door but they shook their head again when Aziraphale reached out to heal them, their bleak expression showing they also knew it wouldn’t be enough. They were out of options and the little voice said, Last chance to fix it. Now or never. Crowley pulled off their glasses and spoke the words they never thought they’d say again, to the only being they’d ever trusted enough to say them to. “I desire a boon, Aziraphale.” The Celestial words crackled with power in spite of the pain in Crowley’s voice.

Aziraphale couldn’t help the shocked gasp that escaped but didn’t hesitate to reply in kind. “Ask and be heard, Crowley, I attend you.”

There was so much that needed to be said, that Crowley desperately wanted to say but the ceremony didn’t allow for deviation and the pain was worsening. They stared into their best friend’s wide golden-green eyes and hoped they would understand. “I seek to mend all rifts and reforge our bond.”

After everything, they still… Aziraphale nodded, eyes stinging with tears, and it took a second to swallow down everything they couldn’t say to be able to say the proper response, “Such forged has lain quiescent but was never sundered. By our efforts combined shall these rifts be mended.”

It was never unspoken. They never broke it, even after... Crowley’s eyes burned with tears they’d been cursed to never let fall and they offered their hand in agreement. “Shoulder to shoulder?”

Mind brimming with words there was clearly no time left for, Aziraphale clasped Crowley’s hand and spoke the final phrase. “My wings to yours.”

Occult power swept through them, renewing the bond and knocking the breath from both of them. Unable to wait a second longer, Crowley bolted through the flat, stumbling into the spacious marble bathroom mortared with every type of magic against scrying and magical attacks and filled to the brim with all manner of tropical plants. Their own little replica of the Garden.

With a ragged gasp Crowley activated the spells and let their wings flash into being. The ink-dark feathers repelled the warm light shining down from the false sky-lights, and they flapped, once, twice, but neither the spells nor the movement did anything to ease the sensation that was going from searing itch to freezing ache. Desperate, feeling as though they were suffocating inside an icebox, they flung off their clothes and slapped on the water, wings spread wide as droplets began to pour from the ceiling.

Aziraphale paused only long enough to set a very unpleasant surprise by the door for anyone who tried to break in before following the sound of running water through the sparse bedroom to the gleaming bathroom. “Crowley?” They were horrified to find Crowley shivering under the downpour, hair and feathers drenched, blood seeping from the mark on their temple. They dashed to catch Crowley before they could collapse to the floor, unfurling their own wings to shelter them from the downpour. “Hold on! Talk to me!” Knowing it was futile Aziraphale tried another healing anyway, swearing when all that changed was the rapidly worsening ache in their own back and wings.

The sound Crowley made was both bitter laugh and heartbroken sob. “Sorry, angel. Guesss they found a way after all. Sssshould’ve known… they wouldn’t… let us get away.”

Aziraphale cradled Crowley close, shaking their head in denial, mind full of recriminations. Do something you stupid angel! Anything! But they couldn’t think past the pain of their heart breaking. “Crowley, please-”

“Never meant… t’hurt… you.” The burning frost was pervasive and growing, seeking the soul embedded within the living vessel that trembled from the freezing cold searing pain. It seeped through muscles and around bones, piercing eyes and lungs and heart, which failed under the onslaught.

“NO!” Aziraphale’s wail turned into a roar of rage and anguish when Crowley’s lovely eyes went dull and sightless. For the first time in six thousand years, Aziraphale didn’t hold back, didn’t toe the line, didn’t do what was expected of them, and power the colour of a bronze sword sharpened with noonlight coruscated around them and their rapidly greying wings. “You can’t take Crowley from me again! I won’t allow it!” Those quick clever hands darted towards the now obvious source of Crowley’s torment, into inky feathers gone heavy and grey with icy embers of sanctified hellfire. “Fuck. You. All.”

If either side had seen Aziraphale at that moment, they might have understood why they were the Guardian of the Eastern Gate.

Crowley was wreathed in pain and loneliness and despair, on the verge of losing themself to the agonizing emptiness, when a brilliant ray of golden-bronze light slashed through the void from a glimmering horizon that hadn’t existed until that moment. They wasted no time hurling themself towards the familiar shining beacon until it overwhelmed their senses with light, and eventually the light resolved itself into the fixture in the ceiling of their bathroom. They soon became aware of the feeling of Aziraphale’s hands raking urgently through their feathers and swamped with the terrible understanding that it was already too late, slurred, “Azsheraph, no...”

But Aziraphale was implacable and continued to extinguish the freezing embers clinging to Crowley’s feathers. “I must.” They ignored the pain of handling the sanctified hellfire and the building cold fire of Heaven’s unholy judgment, only giving in when they sensed the last of the embers vanish in a pathetic puff of smoke.

Crowley marshalled enough energy to move just in time to break Aziraphale’s fall. “Wha-, Aziraphale, did they-” The angel nodded, eyes pressed shut as a shudder passed through their failing body. “No no nononono.” Thoughts still muddled Crowley had sense enough to do one thing.

snap

Water, stopped, midair, crystalline and gleaming in the odd light of out-time.

Aziraphale reached up to press a shaking hand to Crowley’s right cheek, the tips of their fingers resting over the still bleeding hellish brand on Crowley’s temple. Too much left to say, to do, to make up for. Time enough for just one last thing...They stared into Crowley’s lovely eyes, irises blown wide with shock, and as their last desperate heartbeat passed, breathed out, “I’m sorry.”

Aziraphale was gone before Crowley could respond, having used the last of their power to remove the binding mark on Crowley’s temple, and Crowley’s face crumpled and contorted with fury and despair, eyes burning like a star gone nova. “You can’t leave me, you bassstard, not now, not after all thisss!” They called up power from the core of their being, power they didn’t even know they had, and dragged lightning-edged talons through Aziraphale’s ice-rimed feathers, shredding the unholy acidic coating while leaving the feathers untouched. “I won’t let you go! Not like this! Aziraphale! Don’t go! Stay, bless you, stay!” The words devolved into snarled half-spoken curses and pleas as their assault against the Heavenly whatever-the-hell-it-was escalated into a frenzy.

“Ha!” Crowley yelled with sense of triumph when the last of the shreds fell away and dissolved with a ‘pft’, but triumph vanished when Aziraphale’s eyes remained closed, and the fragile corporeal heart remained still, persisting only because of the timelessness of the moment. No no no no no, spiralled in Crowley’s mind as they kissed those blued lips, pushing breath and life back into the dying vessel, reaching with the entirety of their being into the accursed void that Aziraphale had just pulled them from, ready to follow them back into oblivion if need be. Aziraphale!

The crushing emptiness of the void that held Aziraphale was suddenly filled by welcoming darkness, lifting the hopeless despair that they were lost within. Crowley! A shimmering auroral veil unfurled and a hundred million distant lights glimmered into view, warm and gloriously alive, and they flew towards where they sensed Crowley until the darkness resolved into just the familiar dimness held beneath closed eyelids.

Time slammed back into place, no longer held at bay by Crowley’s exhausted power, and the former demon cursed and sputtered as the suddenly far-too-hot-for-comfort water poured over them. It took a bit of flailing around to turn off the taps and afterward Crowley sat slouched against the wall, wings half unfurled and quivering as they tried to catch their breath.

Aziraphale laid utterly still as they regained their senses, drained beyond anything they could ever recall. They finally found the energy to suck in a slow shuddering breath and croak, “Crowley?” A shuddering sob of relief escaped when Crowley took their hand.

“I’m here, Aziraphale.” The reformed angel’s eyes opened, revealing they had shifted to blue-green, and Crowley realized that drowning in them wasn’t half bad really, all things considered. The itch and that building sense of doom were finally gone. ”I’m still here.”

Aziraphale blinked to clear their vision, and took in the sight of poor bedraggled Crowley wilting listlessly against the tile wall. They looked about as bad as Aziraphale felt, but they were there, wonderfully, blessedly alive. “Glad to hear it. You had me quite worried my dear.”

Crowley couldn’t help but snort out a laugh and helped Aziraphale sit up when they struggled against clothes and wings saturated with water and the glutinous but inert ashy grey residue. “Yeah, same. I’ll be very cross with you if you ever do that again, angel.”

“Yes.” Aziraphale gave them an exhausted but triumphant smile. “But you started it.”

“Me?! I-! Wot-! You-!”

The fondly exasperated sputtering of a Celestial Serpent at a loss for words warmed Aziraphale’s heart as nothing else could, and laughter, joyous in a way the former angel realized they hadn’t felt in a very long time, bubbled up, silencing the former demon’s protests. “What would I ever do without you?”

“Don’t you even think about trying to find out!” Crowley scolded, voice breaking, and caught Aziraphale in a nearly-crushing hug. Aziraphale tiredly hugged them back and Crowley rested their forehead against Aziraphale’s for a moment before pulling away to glare. “You barmy bastard, what were you thinking!?”

“Couldn’t let you go, my dear. Very selfish of me, I’m afraid,” Aziraphale murmured, stunned to see tears running down Crowley’s face. “Had to try.”

“You feather-brained do-gooder, you died! You died and I couldn’t save you!” Crowley crushed them in another hug, only easing up when Aziraphale squeaked. “Sorry, sorry-”

“But you did save me,” Aziraphale whispered, needing to tell Crowley what had happened, feeling the memory already beginning to fade. “It was so painful and dark and cold. It was beyond darkness, beyond… I was so afraid, so alone.”

Crowley held them tight, heart breaking. My fault. “Aziraphale...”

Tears welled, offset by a fond smile. “But a million stars exploded into being and I was in the Garden, and I sensed you and I wasn’t afraid any more.” Aziraphale stroked a finger over Crowley’s nearest wing-edge, considering as bits of sodden ash flaked away and disintegrated into nothingness. “I heard you call my name.” Another gentle touch, more ash dropping away from inky feathers that seemed to have gained an odd sheen. “My wings to yours. Always.”

Crowley frowned, pulling away from Aziraphale’s touch, unable to deal with the feelings those words and gentle caresses were stirring up. “C’mon, let’s get you warmed up.” Crowley banished their wings back into the astral plane with a spatter of displaced ash and water and the slight frown on Aziraphale’s face melted into a surprised gasp when Crowley lifted them up.

“I can walk.” Aziraphale held on tightly to Crowley’s shoulders and banished their own wings, though it took far more effort than usual. “...Probably.”

“You’re exhausted. And you just died to save me. Let me do this for you,” said Crowley gruffly, only moving towards the bedroom when Aziraphale nodded.

Crowley gently set Aziraphale down by the bed. “Let me tend your feathers, eh?” they urged, shrugging into a certain plush robe under Aziraphale’s heavy-lidded stare before carefully helping them from their ruined clothes. “Made rather a mess of them, I’m afraid.”

Aziraphale didn’t have much will to resist temptation. What had happened on Sunday felt like a dream, a lifetime ago, and it had been so very long since Crowley had helped care for their wings... It had only ever been Crowley. They nodded as Crowley helped them into the nightshirt they’d used just a few nights earlier, and bundled them under the covers and clicked on the electric blanket. “T’would be lovely, thank you.”

Crowley clicked off the lights, grabbed a towel and once they had unfurled their wings, started gently grooming the grimy feathers, smirking as Aziraphale went boneless with a heavy sigh. “Relax any more and you might just fall asleep for once,” Crowley teased, but there was an ache over their heart. It had been a very long time since they had allowed themself to tend Aziraphale, and after the all too brief interlude before they’d gone to play with fire, Crowley had feared they’d never have the chance to do it again.

“Mmm,” Aziraphale hummed in agreement, too tired to even bother with full sentences any more. Apparently dying took a lot out of a being, once the adrenaline wore off. “Feels lovely. Hadn’t had them out... since forty-one.”

Since the church, since they’d gotten utterly drunk on cursed cider and each other in the shop’s back room and — Crowley’s gentle grooming faltered for a moment, but Aziraphale didn’t notice. “Why not? Thought it was a big deal upstairs, grooming each other?”

“Dangerous.” Aziraphale rubbed a knuckle against Crowley’s leg, wanting to soothe away the bitterness in their voice, thinking about the communal grooming gatherings that were the most boring but also ridiculously fraught office parties in creation. Out of self preservation Aziraphale had created a ‘show up, make nice, make excuse, vanish’ routine that had kept them from ever having to reveal their wings. Being dismissed as inconsequential occasionally had its uses. “You know. Awful. Nosy buggers. Better with you, even without...”

“Aziraphale.” There was a world of meaning in that one word, and they lapsed into silence in the dimness. Crowley gently tended Aziraphale’s wings from top to bottom, confounded by the strange residue that sublimated from cold sandy grit to smoke in their hands. The wings felt normal, well, as normal as the corporeal manifestation of a Celestial being’s power could feel, but every once in a while the oblique light from the doorway would strike them just right to make them seem gold instead of white, with a faint sheen of what might be iridescence. But it was dark and Crowley didn’t want to look too closely, nor think about any more surprises.

By the time Aziraphale’s feathers were back in order Crowley felt as though they were buzzing with energy yet at the same time exhausted. “All done,” they murmured, and Aziraphale furled their wings away into the ether and curled sleepily onto their side towards Crowley with a few mumbled words of gratitude.

Crowley sat in the dark for a long while, doing their best to not think as they listened to Aziraphale’s quiet even breathing that spoke of true sleep. Eventually they slipped from the bed and dressed and retreated to the office. With a snap they miracled up a couch and turned on the TV, letting themself be lulled into a thoughtful stupor that eventually slipped into sleep.

Start at the beginning> Chapter 1 | Chapter 4 < Next Chapter

#good omens celebration #goc2021 #good omens #good omens fanfic #aziraphale/crowley #BAMF Crowley #BAMF Aziraphale #angst #angst but it turns out okay I swear #they kinda die #but they also bring each other back #trust me ;} #long post #readmore #Ineffable Bastards

[bangtan-madi]

546 Days Without You — Eleven: Day 412

Pairing — Seokjin x Reader

Tags — boyfriend!Seokjin, older brother!Yoongi, producer/songwriter!MC, military au (ish), idol au (ish)

Genre — fluff, angst

Word Count — 3.1k

Summary — Kim Seokjin is your entire world, and that world falls apart the moment he and your older brother Yoongi are conscripted into the South Korean military.

Part — 11 / 15

Warnings — minor language

Previous — Next

Days turn into weeks, and weeks turn into months. Time flies by as you travel from Korea to Europe, then to the Americas, then to Australia. In the four months that have passed, the amount of concerts has crossed over two-dozen. You've crossed into at least half as many countries across six continents, and this is only the half-way point.

Shortly after the new year, the group finds itself emptying out of the plane. Having landed in Nagoya minutes before, at an ungodly hour of the morning, you struggle to keep yourself awake. Gravity pulls your body towards the earth. The soft rain falls, creating a lullaby for the weary souls trekking towards the ride to the hotel. You'd like nothing more than to let the ground swallow you whole.

Tour has left most of the members worse for the wear, despite the joy and fulfillment that it brings on an almost daily basis. You considered it a gift from the gods that you had a whole 36 hours before the show. Everyone needed a good shower, a proper meal, and a long night's sleep after leaving Melbourne after the last show. If the next concert was going to be a success, the boys and you needed it desperately.

Along with some cheering up. It isn't lost on you that this is the last show for the next month. After Nagoya, you'll all be heading back to Seoul, where Hoseok and Namjoon will begin final preparations for enlistment. Their date is just under a month away; once mid-February arrives, you'll be saying goodbye to two more members.

It's the thought that's consumed your mind as of late. A lot has happened since Seokjin and Yoongi were conscripted; over a year has passed. Both the time and space have allowed you to reevaluate your stance on conscription.

A soft hand shakes your shoulder, bringing you out of your quasi-dream state and back to the moment. Jimin offers you a hand, assisting you in stepping from the car. The hotel is dimly lit against the Nagoya sky, and the famous castle stands high against the horizon. Any other night you might stay and admire for longer, as this city was one of Seokjin's favorites, but you willfully allow your closest friend to tug you into the building.

As Sejin checks the group in for the next few nights, you throw your arms around Hoseok's neck, mumbling, "Up, up."

The brunet bends down, scooping you up and cradling you against his back. Hands under your thighs, arms around his shoulders, head lulling against the crook of his neck, you welcome his comfort — quite literally with open arms. The youngest member kindly grabs your suitcase.  Breathing deeply, your eyes flutter shut once again.

"Jungkookie's right," you slur on the short elevator ride to the upper floor. "You do smell nice."

Hoseok's laugh reverberates through his body, one of the greatest sounds turned to one of the greatest feelings. It's joy taken physical form.

"You're so cute when you're delirious," he chuckles.

"Don't make me out-rap you next time we perform. I have no problem taking my brother's place in 'UGH.'"

Hoseok slides the key to one of the rooms. "Oooh? Threatening me now, are we?"

Nodding against his shoulder, you tighten your arms when he tries to put you down. "M'comfy."

"[Y/n]-ahhh."

"Fiiine."

You drop your clingy arms from around his neck, and Hoseok settles you onto the queen bed in the center of the room. Jungkook drops off your suitcase, giving a small wave before departing for his suite across the hall.

A sudden vibration originating from your jacket pocket causes you to stir. A soft, quiet chorus from Seokjin's last song plays. Your exhaustion suddenly fading, you tug the phone from your pocket. Your boyfriend's face glows on the screen, giving you the option to accept or decline a face-to-face.

A grin spreads across your face, and you accept without hesitation. The call connects, and suddenly you're able to see him. He's already dressed in uniform, the patches on his collar revealing yet another promotion that happened over the new year. This status gives him even more freedom than before, and he can pretty much call you whenever he wants. Yoongi has reached the same status, although he tends to send you more voice memos than actual calls. Just like the two of you used to do.

Seokjin laughs, eyes crinkling up at the corners, at the sight of you on your side. Cheeks mushed up against the pillow, eyes barely open, curled up into a fetal position, you must be a sight for sore eyes.

"Just landed, I see?"

"Shut up," you murmur.

"You look exhausted, Jagi."

"That's because she is, hyung," Hoseok interrupts from across the room. He's finished dragging his suitcase into the room, then opens the door that leads to the other bedroom in the other suite. "Can't you call some other time? We're about to crash."

You roll your eyes and snicker. "Someone's getting cranky."

"He's right,"

Seokjin chuckles, bringing your attention back to his face.

"I just got up, and I wanted to check in, make sure you got to Nagoya safely. That's all. Don't want to keep you up."

Giving a thumbs-up, you force a smile and pull yourself into a sitting position. "Never better! Slept the whole way. How the hell are you up so early?"

"You know me: I'm always the early bird!"

"Yeah, except the earlier you get up, the more chaotic you are. Remember the punching bag and yoga mat incident?"

"Well—"

"—Or the time you about choked on mangos, after calling yourself elegant?"

"Aish! I get it! At least I don't snore when we stay at any—no, every hotel."

Hoseok returns to the doorway, toothbrush shoved into his mouth and an unamused expression on his face. He gestures with a flourish of his hand. "Wrap it up with loudmouth. I'm dead. We can admire your bickering tomorrow when we're human again."

Giving the older member a nod of assurance, you watch in mild amusement as he leaves for the washroom once again. Turning your eyes back to the phone, you find Seokjin mirroring your playful, mischievous expression.

"We're the worst, aren't we?"

"Oh, definitely."

Seokjin sighs, then straightens his posture.

"Do me a quick favor before I hand up?"

"For you, anything."

"Wooow, cheesy, [Y/n.]"

"Be quiet or I might change my mind!"

"Can you show me the Castle? In the center of Nagoya? I'm sure your hotel can see it. You can see it from anywhere, pretty much."

Your smile softens at his request. Swinging your legs over the side of the bed, you step towards the balcony door. Even through the window, Nagoya Castle is stunning. Once the door is opened and you step out into the crisp air, you flip the view around so Seokjin can see what you do. The lights around the castle case brilliant golden light across the white and green structure.

"Wooow,"

he breathes, causing you to smile at the screen.

"That's just like how I remember."

"Wish you were here to see it in person."

"You know I would be if I could."

Flipping the screen around so that he can see you once again, you ask, "When can you use the time off you've built up? I didn't think there was anything you had to wait for after your first year."

"Not on paper there isn't," he nods, running a hand over his shortened black hair. "But you haven't been back in Korea since before then—way before then—and I can't leave the country while on leave, so..."

"You can take a day off without us being there, you know."

Seokjin shakes his head stubbornly.

"Not vacation time. Nope, I'm saving all that for when you come back."

"We'll be back for a few days when Joon and Hobi enlist, their ceremony and such," you mention.

"I know..."

His sentence trails off, awkward and hanging in the air. Your boyfriend's eyes avert yours, and something in his voice cues you to pry further.

Tilting your head slightly, you lean against the railing of the balcony. "Why the hesitation?"

"I'm not hesitating, it's nothing."

You cock an eyebrow and smirk. "You're a liar, Kim Seokjin. Fess up."

His lips pull into a smile, and his eyes flutter shut. Not out of exhaustion, as your own so desperately crave, but out of near-annoyance.

"I was going to surprise you, fool! I was going to take off those days and show up at the dorms without telling you...but I guess you read right through me."

To say your jaw dropped in surprise would be a huge understatement. Eyes gaping and breath caught in your throat, you gawk at your boyfriend as he bursts into laughter.

"Surprised, Jagi?"

"Um...yes! You—wait, how? What?"

"Korean, [Y/n]. You can rap for god's sake."

You shake your stun away, forcing watery eyes to remain held together. "You're serious? I'm really gonna see you in less than a month?"

Seokjin's laughter fades, but his eyes are still sparkling.

"Very serious. I've already gotten the time approved."

Tears prick your eyes, and you lower your head into your sweater sleeve to hide from his gaze. This only amuses Seokjin.

"Getting all soft on me again? Your cool exterior is crumbling."

"I hope you know that this is all your fault, you ass. I never used to be this close to crying all the damn time."

"It's cause you've been without me for so long, isn't it? I'm your cure."

The balcony door slides open, revealing a sleepy, disheveled, and unhappy Hoseok. He doesn't say a word, only glowers at you—whites of his eyes hardly visible as he squints—until you sigh, "Fine, I know, I know. Time's up." After which he nods once and disappears back into the hotel.

"I'll go,"

Seokjin agrees, voice lighter than when he first called.

"Gotta do some work sometime today."

You blow a kiss to the camera, one that he pretends to catch and hold against his chest, over his heart. "Love you, miss you, but you know all that."

"I do,"

he teases.

"Love you, miss you, even more."

The next morning, you're awake after most of the other members. The sound of Hoseok drying his hair brings you out of peaceful slumber, much to your grumpy chagrin.

"Rise and shine, sleeping beauty!" he cheers, already fully awake even before coffee.

You give him the universal sign of love and affection, otherwise known as the bird, and stumble towards the other bathroom. Hoseok giggles at your less-than-pleasant attitude and goes about his business as you struggle to get ready.

After stepping from the hotel room, refreshed and ready for the unplanned day, Jimin appears with a cup of coffee extended towards you. "Fuel for m'lady," he greets.

Grateful for the favor, you give him a swift hug and walk at his side towards the recreational area on your floor. Suited with a pool table, miniature bar, breakfast nook, dining and sitting area, it's a perfect place for the whole group to spread out and hang in the free time. Since the members and staff take up most of the rooms on this floor, you basically have it all to yourselves.

"So, what's the plan for the day?" you announce as you enter.

Taehyung looks up from his platter of local tamagoyaki; beside him, Namjoon continues to read the book in hand. "I don't think we've decided," the former states.

"The show isn't until tomorrow night, so we have time to kill," Jungkook states from the breakfast bar. He's piling every kind of Japanese breakfast cuisine he can find onto his plate. "Sejin says we can kill time here if we want."

"Or we can go out and explore with the managers," Hoseok adds as he enters the room. "I don't know about you, but I'm starting to feel claustrophobic."

"Agreed," you mutter. Taking a long sip from your coffee cup, you walk towards the breakfast bar and snag onigiri. Looking around, you make sure that the members are the only ones present. No managers, no staff, no cameras. "I have an idea."

At your lowered voice, you catch the youngest's attention first. Jimin grins in your direction, and you flash them both a mischievous wink. "Aigoo," Namjoon breathes.

"I think we all need to get out of here, and I don't know about the rest of you, but I kinda wanna explore Nagoya like a local. No security, no managers, no babysitters. Think about it--when's the last time we did that?"

"Went out without Sejin or security, and outside of Korea?" Taehyung asks, and you nod. He takes a moment to contemplate, eyes flitting upwards as he thinks. "Honestly, I can't remember."

Hoseok pipes up. "Since before Wings, probably. We're never really alone anymore."

Sensing trepidation from the members, you hop up onto the back of the sofa, perched with legs crossed. You press the tips of your fingers against the opposite hand's, creating a mirror image of mischief in front of your wicked grin.

"Here's my proposal. I've been to Nagoya a couple of times with Seokjin. It's one of his favorite cities, so I know all the best spots for fun. I also know how to avoid staff for the same reason."

"Yeah, you're an expert," Namjoon scoffs.

You hold up a hand in his direction. "Be quiet, Bonsai Boy. The Queen is speaking."

"She's spent too much time with Jin-hyung," Jungkook murmurs under his breath, and you choose to ignore him for now.

"So...who's going to take a leap of faith and trust me?"

Jimin mirrors your folded-hands, then slowly moves to rub them together with a slightly evil chuckle. "I'm in."

"Of course you are."

Jimin grabs the Taehyung and Jungkook by the arm, dragging them closer to you. "They are, too."

Seeing neither Maknae put up an argument to the contrary, you turn your hooded gaze to the eldest members present. "What say ye, Jung Hoseok and Kim Namjoon?"

Hoseok begins bouncing on his toes, clapping his hands together as he turns towards the leader. His smile is bright and wide, earning a sigh and shake of the head from Namjoon.

He gestures towards you with a defeated smile, dimples showing at the corners of his mouth. "Lead the way, Ms. Queen."

Having the agreement from each member, you clap your hands once and announce, "All right! Everyone go grab what they want for an afternoon and evening out. Make sure to grab a cap or beanie and glasses so we can blend in. I'll text the managers and tell them we're going to be hanging out in my room and that we want some alone time. Done it before, and they've never bothered me so I think it'll work. Meet back here in two minutes."

"How do you expect to get out of the hotel without being seen?" Jungkook inquires as he removes his arm from Jimin's grasp.

You reach up and pat the younger boy on the head. "Don't worry. I'm magic."

As everyone scurries back to their rooms, you text Sejin along the way; you give the listed excuse, and then grab a jacket and shoulder bag. Hoseok tosses you one of his beanies, and you pair it with your sunglasses.

Once reconvened, you nod for the boys to follow you. Pressing a finger to your lips, you tip-toe down the hall. The members follow suit, equally as quiet and sneaky, like a series of ducklings behind the mother goose. Instead of going towards the elevator, you lead them to the opposite end of the hallway. The staircase is unmarked and unguarded, but you've stayed at this hotel before on a previous trip and remembered it from then.

Opening the door, you usher each of the boys inside. "Go to the second floor. There's a fire escape we can take from there that will put us outside the building without having to run into everyone waiting in the lobby or the fans outside."

"You're eerily good at sneaking around," Taehyung repeats the sentiment from earlier, though he's smiling instead of shaking his head.

Your grin widens. "Did I ever tell you that my first date with Seokjin involved us sneaking into a theater to hear the live orchestra perform?"

"That makes a lot of sense," Namjoon chides in his usual passive-aggressive tone.

Once outside the hotel, around the corner from the entrance where most of the fanatic fans and insistent reporters pool together, you turn to the boys with two thumbs-ups. "Free at last! So, where do we wanna go? I know the best miso katsu place you'll ever visit. Or maybe we do something outside...or maybe a bit of both! What are we feeling?"

"We just ate," Jimin states, patting his stomach to show he doesn't have any room for more food at the moment.

Tapping your chin, you think back across all of the times Seokjin had taken you on various tours of Nagoya over the years. It's at least half-a-dozen times at this point, and on those days, you'd had a variety of adventures. Food, art, thrills, history: he'd shown you them all. You've explored the Castle and various other historical shrines and temples, and you've been to just about every food market and restaurant in the Showa-ku and Kita-ku wards. Museums and galleries have been ventured, as have tours of local wildlife and expansive parks. There have been many a shopping excursion, and you're an idiot if you think that Seokjin hadn't taken you to an amusement park or arcade at least a couple times. Holiday festivals, cosplay summits, local music--you've done it all.

But there's one adventure you had two years ago that's stuck in your mind ever since, the one day you both had more fun acting like children than any other date prior. A massive grin spreads across your face, and you grab the two oldest members' hands, dragging them towards the nearest subway station.

"Woah! Where are we going?"

"The Meijo Line!"

Taglist — @joyful-jimin​​​​, @gracehiii​​​, @live-2-fangirl​​​, @rjsmochii​​​​, @btsnatalena​

#546 days without you #546dwy #seokjin #kim seokjin #bts jin #bts seokjin #bts #bangtan #bangtan sonyeondan #jin x reader #jin x yn #seokjin x reader #seokjin x yn #kim seokjin x reader #kim seokjin x yn #bts x reader #bts x yn #kim seokjin fluff #seokjin fluff #seokjin angst #kim seokjin angst #jin angst #jin fluff #bts fluff #bts angst #brother!yoongi #boyfriend!jin #boyfriend!seokjin #bts fic #jin fic

[anarchyduck]

In Another World

Day Three: Soul World

I’m two days behind now, sobs

AO3

----------------------- “Mr. Stark?” 

“I don’t feel so good.” 

“I don’t want to go. Please, please-”

“I’m sorry.”

Peter Parker wakes to the sound of his alarm going off. 

Blindly, he reaches out from beneath the blankets, groping around on the side table until he finds his phone and shuts it off. His hand retreats and he groans, turning his face to bury it into his pillow. Maybe if he’s lucky, he can sneak in just a few more minutes of sleep… 

“Peter!” May calls and knocks on his bedroom door. “Get up or you won’t have time for breakfast.” 

So much for more sleep. 

Peter groans as he drags himself out of bed. Everything feels weird, like he’s slept too long and forgot what day it is. He rubs the sleep from his eyes as he stumbles around to find clothes, dragging a t-shirt off the floor to wear. The wrinkles will drive May nuts so he grabs a hoodie to wear over it. 

He wanders through his morning routine with still that nagging feeling that something isn’t quite right. Something is missing or he forgot something. A test? Blind panic hits him hard as he scrambles to remember. No. No test. Peter relaxes and manages to finish brushing his teeth before another crisis hits. 

“Coffee is ready.” May announces from the kitchen. Peter can smell toast (slightly burnt, the strawberry jam jar is open) and rich hazelnut coffee, the scent filling the apartment. 

It takes him a second to remember. May doesn’t drink hazelnut coffee. 

“Hon, have you seen my-oh never mind.” 

That voice. Peter knows that voice. It’s unmistakable. He could be suffering from amnesia and still recognize that voice. 

Heart pounding, he turns the corner from the hallway to the kitchen and-

“Uncle Ben?” 

Ben Parker looks up and flashes one of his half grins at Peter. “Morning. See you haven’t combed your hair again.” He pockets his car keys and ventures into the kitchen for coffee. 

Peter trails after, stunned but unable to explain why. Of course it’s Ben. Why wouldn’t Ben be here?

“Oh, Peter…” May appears in front of him, tsking under her breath as she attempts to tame his wild bedhead. “Did you at least brush your teeth? Honestly, you and Ben are absolutely hope- Peter? Honey, what’s wrong?”

Peter’s eyes burn, his chest tight with some unexplained emotion. “H-Huh?” he blinks, focusing on May as she looks at him with concern. 

“Are you hurt? Headache?” May lays her palm on his forehead and cups his cheeks. “You didn’t get hurt last night did you?”

Peter’s brows draw together. “L-Last night?” 

“While on patrol?” May steps back to give him a proper look over. Searching for hidden wounds or bruises he failed to disclose. 

Patrol. Patrol. Oh. Patrol. Spider-Man. 

But wait, then that means-

“Maybe I ought to take you to the gym sometime.” Ben says as he pours coffee into his thermos. “Teach you some old boxing techniques and how to fight properly.” He stirs in some sugar and creamer. “Stark’s fancy gizmos can’t save you from dodging a real punch, you know.” 

Well there’s a lot to unpack there. Peter can’t keep from staring at his uncle. His mind scrambles to keep up, to put the pieces back into place. It all seems right and yet, he feels something is off. It’s right but it isn’t. 

“Peter?” May is still standing in front of him, worrying. She brushes curls from his face. “Maybe you should stay home today, just in case.” 

“No, no I’m fine May. Really.” Peter reassures, even managing a small smile. “Think I slept weird or had crazy dreams, that’s all.” 

“The boy is fine, May.” Ben says then looks at Peter, “Grab some grub for the road, kiddo. I’ll drop you off.” 

Peter falls into routine, grabbing a piece of toast and protein bar (one Tony made up for him, he recognizes the packaging). “Bye May!” he calls out as he follows his uncle out of the apartment. 

-----------------------

He can’t shake the weirdness. It clings to him like a second coat. He also can’t stop stealing glances at his uncle. There’s a little voice in his head that says it isn’t right, that Ben shouldn’t be here. Yet here he is in the flesh. Driving him to school. 

“So you didn’t sneak out last night?” Ben asks, breaking through Peter’s thoughts. They stop at a red light, sun shining through a break in the clouds. 

Peter shakes his head. “No. Promise.” he says. 

Ben hums and nods. His hair looks a little grayer than Peter expects. Which is weird because what else did he expect? For Ben’s hair to not be grayer? Grayer compared to what? “You’re going to the Tower today, right? After school?” 

Peter nods. “Yeah. Mr. Stark wants my help making some gear for Natasha.” 

“Black Widow, huh?” Ben lightly whistles. “Boy, if I were only twenty years younger.” 

“Ben!” Peter laughs. 

“I’m just saying! She seems like a mighty fine woman.” 

“She can be super scary sometimes. Moves even quieter than I do.” A memory flashes in Peter’s mind, of being in the tower with the other Avengers. Training with Nat, hanging out in the kitchen while Steve cooked, sitting down to the table to enjoy a meal together. They play like scenes from a movie reel and he feels strangely detached from it. 

His chest tightens with strange emotion again. He closes his eyes as they begin to burn. His other senses take over. The smell of Ben’s aftershave and cologne. The way the brakes squeak when they stop at another red light. They’re in Ben’s car and he wonders how it could be possible. They got rid of Ben’s car after… after… 

-----------------------

“Dude I can’t believe you get to work on Avenger gear!” Ned whispers loudly. 

"It's only cool the first time." Peter says. He shoves books into his locker, ignoring the crumpled up papers at the bottom that continue being squished and crinkled. "The novelty wears off after the fiftieth Widow Bite." 

"Whatever man, it's still awesome."

Peter stands at his open locker for a moment, staring at it's interior as he tries to think of what textbook he needs for his next class. What is his next class…

"Oh, did you ask your aunt and uncle if you can come over this weekend?" Ned asks. 

Aunt and uncle. Aunt and uncle. Why is that phrasing so weird? 

"Pete? Did you hear me?" 

Why can't he shake that feeling that something isn't right? 

"What's up losers?" Michelle's voice snaps him out of his thoughts and Peter quickly shuts his locker before she can see the mess. "Decathlon's been canceled for the day. Harrington is out sick." 

"Oh." Is all Peter can say to that. Come to think of it, several teachers are out today. How weird. "Maybe it's the flu."

Michelle shrugs her shoulders. "Yeah maybe." She says. A group of upperclassmen pass by the trio, giggling and talking loudly enough to draw Peter's attention. Michelle narrows her eyes slightly and she asks, "Have you guys noticed anything weird?" 

Ned shakes his head. "No. Like what?" 

"Don't know yet." Michelle replies cryptically. "Something just feels off today." 

The back of Peter's neck itches and tingles, and he reaches back to rub the spot. If MJ notices something then maybe there is more going on. "Maybe you slept wrong?" He suggests lamely.

Michelle gives him a look then scoffs. "Yeah, slept wrong. Sure." 

The warning bell rings in the half empty hallway.

-----------------------

Peter walks out of Avengers Tower to find his uncle's beige Toyota Corolla waiting for him. It surprises him to see it then he wonders why it should. Ben always picks him up after lab time at the Tower. 

"Hey Petey!" Ben greets as Peter slides into the passenger seat. "Have a good time?"

"Yeah," Peter replies as he puts on his seatbelt. "We got a lot of work done." Now if only he could remember exactly what that work was. He remembers Ned and MJ at school, being picked up by Happy and then working with Mr. Stark. What did they work on? He can't remember. The entire event is a blur. 

"You aunt is suggesting Thai for dinner tonight." Ben says as they get on the road. 

"Sounds good." Peter replies, not really listening. Why can't he remember lab time? He can see Tony's face, plain as day, so why can't he remember what they did? Is he getting sick? Come to think of it, he can’t remember Happy picking him up from school. An old memory plays instead, something he knows already happened in the past but definitely didn’t happen today. It feels more like he’s watching an event play out rather than being part of it. 

"Uncle Ben? Do you ever feel like you're missing something?" Peter asks finally. 

"Like what?" 

"Like," Peter sighs as he struggles to explain without sounding crazy. "Like you know something is off? Like something isn't… right?" 

Ben hums and doesn't respond. The car rolls to a stop at a red light, silence stretching to the point of being unbearable. When Peter finally looks at his uncle, he finds the old man staring at him with an unreadable expression. 

"You're very smart, Peter." He says. "You've always been smart, you know? Even when you were little." 

The tightness in Peter's chest worsens. The back of his neck tingles. "Uncle Ben?" He asks with uncertainty. Something isn’t right. 

"We had hoped you wouldn't notice." Ben continues. 

Peter frowns

“What-”

Peter blinks and, when his eyes open, he's no longer in the car. 

He's back at the apartment, sitting on the couch. Star Wars: A New Hope plays on the TV and a bowl of warm popcorn sits on the coffee table before him. The light above the stove is on in the kitchen and he can see the pale blue light from the nightlight in the hallway. The apartment is quiet. He can’t sense May.

"This was your dad's favorite too." Ben says beside him. “We saw it in the theaters when it came out.”

Peter takes a shuddering breath and swallows past the lump in his throat. "Am I dead?" 

"Yes and no." Ben pops some popcorn into his mouth. 

"But you…" Peter's voice catches in his throat, tears burning his eyes. "You're…" 

"Dead." Ben nods solemnly. “Yes.” 

It hits him harder than it should. A flashback to a dark night, a mugging gone wrong, and Ben laying on the concrete covered in blood. Peter pleaded with him, begged him to stay, to hold on, that help was coming. But Ben died anyway. Peter went home with blood on his hands. 

“I’m so sorry, Ben.” Peter says with a strangled sob. “I-I didn’t want you to die. I didn’t know… I didn’t mean…” 

“Shh,” Ben shushes and Peter feels himself pulled forward, his face buried against soft cotton that smells like wood and leather. A scent that brought comfort when Peter was scared, that taught him how to hold his fist, who gave him wisdom even when he didn’t understand the meaning of it. 

Ben’s voice rumbles deep in his chest as he continues holding the sobbing boy. “I’m so proud of you, Peter. Always have been. Just look at all the good you’ve done with your life. And I know, your parents are proud of you too.” 

Peter sobs freely against Ben’s chest, clinging to him tightly. If it hurts, Ben doesn’t say anything. He continues holding him, rocking with him gently like he used to when Peter was small. He cries until he can’t and, even after the tears dry up, he doesn’t pull away. He doesn’t notice the movie is no longer playing or the bright orange that takes the apartment’s place. 

Ben sighs then. “We don’t have much longer.” he says. 

Peter lifts his head, eyes red and tears marking his face. “What do you mean?” he asks. A childish fear takes him and he holds Ben’s shirt. “I don’t want you to go. Please, Ben, stay. Stay with me and May.” 

Ben’s hand lands on his shoulder, squeezes it as he meets Peter’s gaze. Despite the tears in his eyes, Ben smiles. “We’ll be together again. I love you, Peter.” 

Peter sniffles and he puts his hand over Ben’s. “Love you too, Uncle Ben.” He manages a tearful smile. “I’ll make you proud. I promise.” 

Ben’s smile widens as the yellow-orange light brightens around them, surrounding them in it’s glow. Peter keeps his eyes open as long as he can until it becomes too bright, until the brightness forces him to close his eyes. 

-----------------------

Peter Parker wakes to the orange skies of Titan.

#webpril 2021 day 3 #peter parker #ben parker #may parker #aunt may #ned leeds #michelle jones #mj #spiderman #mcu #duckie's writing

[carrottuan93]

Haven't met you yet | Mark

Masterlist (2/4) | part1 - part3 - part4

Starring: MK x You

Tags: Mark Tuan, Fluff, Destiny, Waiting, Christmas, Bookworm, Nerd, Love, Fate

Total WC: 1420

You felt an agonizing level of pain hitting your head the moment you open your eyes to the sound of some lowkey hip-hop playlist in the background that you know nothing about. You don’t remember setting up your spotify on loop for the rest of the night but still you find the music suit for your taste despite hearing it for the first time. You shuffled on your bed, uneasy with the throbbing sensation of your cranium being drilled in the process. You sat down on your spot and were greeted by a glass of water and aspirin purposely located on a nearby table to tend on your painful hangover. Your eyebrows creased in confusion as you roam your eyes around the unfamiliar black and white interior of the room. Eyes squinting, you placed the partially emptied glass on the table after drinking the medicine and still you’re in no better means of explaining as to why you’re feeling weird today. You give your head a slight massage and a few taps on your cheek as you gather your composure. You noticed that you slept on your black above the knee dress and must have forgotten to switch into your pajamas last night, which explains you still have your coat intact when you went home but it is missing already by the time you woke up. Where could it be? You shuffled at the edge of the bed and slumped on the ground looking for your stilettos when you came across the sight of a shoe cabinet filled with converse sneakers aligned in pairs as well as an open dresser filled with different varieties of hoodies and men clothing that are too foreign to be included in your own cabinet.

 “Shit!" reality hit you like a thunderbolt in a desert void of air, cutting all possible passageways for blood to flow freely on your circulation as if you became anemic at one point in your life. The lucid interval took effect when sobriety woke your being upon hearing the sound of someone using the shower and the smell of fresh shave accumulating on the slightly opened bathroom door. You gulped as you start to look for your sanity being thrown away on the windowsill and you're mentally preparing to jump outside as well because you still have no clue on how you ended up in a different room. What have you done for Good lord's sake?

 ----

 You glanced on your phone whilst taking your 3rd cup of coffee for the day. 10 minutes before 5pm, you read as it flashed on your screen. You haven't eaten any decent meal ever since you left the stranger's room in a hurry this morning. Fearing that you'll be seen by the guy in the shower, you escaped in the flash of a lightning. To make your day even worse, you cannot find your stilettos underneath his bed and you even grabbed the wrong coat on your way out. Worry haunted you like a madman after discovering that you accidentally went to room 1207 across your unit 1212. You're mentally skinning yourself alive by breaking into the lion's den without even knowing whom did you spend the night with. Your best friend sent you tons of messages asking for specific details because you’ve been sending her cryptic texts about your situation. You weren’t thinking straight and the bile in your stomach is rising up like it’s about to explode any minute now. But you can’t escape your work with your current dilemma that’s why you need to stay sane until you meet with Eunhee tonight.

 "Ms. Y/n, thank you for submitting the report on time even on a holiday. I know it must be troublesome for you to go here while you're in the middle of your Christmas spirit but we’d like to fully adhere to our schedule on time before new year. Mr. Raymond is an important client, so we need to make sure that we're being transparent at all costs.” After a meaty discussion with your senior, you gladly took a breather when your meeting adjourned. You’re an accountant and being part of an accounting firm surely entails hours and hours of long work leaving you with no time at all for yourself. It’s a busy season as usual but you won’t miss out the holidays for your busy roll. You’d like to check your schedule on your planner but to no avail, you misplaced it last night. Since you’re carrying it wherever you go, you’re 101% sure that you left it on the unit across your place along with your other stuff. You haven’t had the opportunity to claim your things this morning due to the embarrassment crisis that is weighing down on your shoulder. Your current work engagement with this particular client is a big deal for you, so you chose to save your ass from being reprimanded by your boss and being late to work. Maybe your best friend can think clearly than your wasted self. ‘Just kill me already’ is all you can tell your poor being. You heard your phone rang all of a sudden and Eunhee’s name flashed on the screen.

 “Girl, where the hell are you?” You must be zoning out. You reached the brink of your anxiety when the clock’s hand struck to eight, wondering how come 3 hrs has already passed with you just sitting on your cubicle.

 “Eunhee, I’ve been through a tough day and I don’t know how to explain my current situation but I’ll be there in a second I promise.” And the Amazing Race Christmas edition has begun. Dressed on your black turtleneck blouse tucked in your skinny jeans, you complete your party outfit with a stylish beanie to match with your caramel trench coat so as not to look underprepared for the occasion. You then rushed through the nearest macaron store to grab your order and have decided that you just finish doing your makeup inside the uber to maximize your time. Geez, it’s freezing cold outside and the streets are filled with lovebirds which only made your stomach turn into a sour milk. You’re famished by the time you arrived at the address Eunhee sent you and you were welcomed with her bright smile and her expression demanding for an explanation.

 “I know that look on your eyes Eunhee but feed me first before I prepare for my death bed.” You hugged her so tight like your world depended on her. She dragged you inside the house which you believe to be Jackson’s place. You didn’t think of Jackson as some kind of a party jock but sure this guy knows how to throw a proper party for a group. His house is warm and inviting, you gotta commend his taste for classical music filling the air but he’s nowhere to be found. You’re slowly getting into the holiday mood, with a few acquaintances that you meet along the hallways and a feast filled with nothing but sweet treats, you began to think if you went to a gingerbread house instead of an adult’s party.

 “Before everything else, where are the drinks?” You need a booze so you can open up easily to Eunhee but she ordered you to pick a paper inside the bowl in return.

“Calm down, Jackson’s little cousins from the US are coming as well so you won’t be expecting to see liquor at this early hour. We serve the kiddie treats first and we move on to a full-grown up party in the midnight but you gotta choose your secret Santa first.” You gave her an inquisitive look and wonder what secret Santa is she talking about? You picked a random green paper.

 “Wait, what’s with the secret Santa thing?”

“Everyone is required to bring a gift for someone else”

“I wasn’t informed? You didn’t tell me!” Maybe today’s series of panic attacks aren’t enough for your breakdown but here’s the cherry to the cake.

 “Oh my god, Y/n.” Eunhee gasped in shock just in time when Jackson entered the living room in his bright holiday spirit.

“Hey Y/n. Looking good tonight, huh? You like my place?” He went over to Eunhee and gave her a quick kiss on her cheek.

“My first time going to your place feels like home, Jackson.” You smiled at him and you could tell he came with a company.

“That’s nice to hear. But girls, I want you to meet my cousin from LA, Mark.”

#mark #marktuan #mark tuan #got7 #got7 mark #got7 fluff #got7 imagines #got7 fanfic #fluff #kpop #kpop fanfic #kpop fluff #ahgase #jackson #got7jackson #got7 jackson

[the-kaedageist]

Through the proper channels: fjorclay #49

Sorry for the delay with this, Bonita! My work event finished yesterday so I FINALLY had time to finish writing this today! This is cavity inducing like all of my Fjorclay is.

Fjord/Caduceus, #49: “I don’t want to screw this up.” (1,523 words)

It had been a long time since Caduceus had shared a bed with anyone.

Fjord kicked like the worst of his siblings, restless and throwing off the covers, and Caduceus stared despairingly up at the ceiling as Fjord let out a grunt and a slight snore beside him. He was new to love – Jester’s books hadn’t talked about this.

The rest of it was amazing, of course. Fjord was funny and headstrong and sometimes made terrible decisions. His hand was warm beneath Caduceus’s palms as they sat together at meals. He didn’t seem to mind Caduceus’s newness to romance, or the huge feelings that seemed like they were sometimes going to envelope Caduceus whole, and he was endlessly patient. He pressed warm and soft kisses against Caduceus’s mouth, a new way of showing affection that Caduceus was quickly becoming quite fond of.

But Fjord was a terrible, terrible bedpartner.

He slept poorly, tossing and turning. He stole pillows out from under Caduceus’s head and pulled all of the blankets over to his side. He kicked and elbowed like he was trying to wrestle in a fighting pit. Caduceus wondered if he’d misunderstood something about relationships, because he’d thought sharing a bed was pretty standard. Was there something wrong with him? Were they just incompatible?

Fjord shifted again, turning over to his side to face away from Caduceus and growling softly under his breath, taking most of the covers with him again. Caduceus sighed despairingly and sat up, the room around them barely visible in the post-midnight darkness. He glanced over at Fjord and gave an exasperated but fond sigh, reaching over to run his fingers through Fjord’s longer-than-ever hair. Fjord snuffled in his sleep but didn’t stir.

Caduceus pushed himself to his feet. If he couldn’t sleep, maybe he could at least ask the Wildmother what he should do about his new, unexpected predicament. Because that was the dilemma – he absolutely did not want anything that was happening to stop. He wanted to share a bed with Fjord, no matter how annoying he was. He wanted to keep these soft moments. He didn’t know how to reconcile this, and it was rare that Caduceus found himself out of his depth.

He’d almost made it to the door when he heard Fjord murmur from the bed, “Caduceus.”

He turned to face him, worried that he’d woken him, and his heart skipped a beat when he saw Fjord smiling sleepily at him, so soft and sweet and trusting that Caduceus felt terrible about being so bad at relationships. Fjord seemed to sense his mood; his brow furrowed. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” Caduceus said, trying to keep his voice calm. “I just can’t sleep so I’m going to make some tea.”

Fjord watched him for a long moment. “You don’t have to deflect with me,” he said finally. “Not anymore. Not about this.”

Caduceus sighed and returned to the bed, sitting next to Fjord heavily. He wished Fjord would realize he didn’t see it as deflecting – Caduceus didn’t like to force anyone to deal with his feelings, that was all. But Fjord had decided that it was his own personal challenge, and it was nice to be aggressively cared about, really it was.

It also meant it was really hard to not be honest with Fjord about his feelings.

“Fjord,” he started, not meeting Fjord’s eyes and picking at the side of one of the blankets with his thumb. “I—I’m so happy.” He snuck a glance up at Fjord, but other than a raised eyebrow, he didn’t seem too disturbed by this beginning. “So, so happy.” He took Fjord’s hand, squeezing it in his. “But I haven’t been sleeping.”

“You haven’t been sleeping,” Fjord repeated before a yawn overtook him. He laughed, so charming even sleep-addled, and gave Caduceus a soft grin, reaching over and running his hands along his hair. “I’m sorry. Is that my fault?”

“Fjord, I don’t want to screw this up,” Caduceus confessed, closing his eyes desperately. It was so, so hard to ask for things he needed. What had made him like that? His childhood? Those years left alone? It was so easy for him to look into the soul of another person, to see how the threads of their life were woven together to create both the problems that plagued them and the joys that sustained them. When he looked into his own, though, it was like looking into a void. “I’m scared,” he finally admitted.

Fjord’s facial expressions went from charmingly sleepy to charmingly confused. “You’re scared because you haven’t been sleeping?”

Fjord did not share Caduceus’s gift of deep insight – it was a compliment in and of itself that he had even noticed that Caduceus deflected from talking about his feelings. If Caduceus wanted to make a point, he was going to have to spell it out.

“I’m scared because this was supposed to be easy,” Caduceus confessed, not looking Fjord in the eye again. “In the books I’ve read, it’s always easy. And it is easy, until we go to sleep.”

“Hey,” Fjord said, his voice soft. “Sleep is important. You need it to get your spells back.” He gently brushed a strand of Caduceus’s hair from his face. “Do you think my feelings for you were going to change because you can’t share a bed with me?”

Caduceus felt his face heat, which was ridiculous, because his fears were not so fully formed as all that. It was more of an amorphous thing, this fear that if he voiced his needs out loud, people would find them too demanding. People would leave.

“Is that okay? That I might need to go back to our old sleeping arrangement? I thought relationships—”

Fjord squeezed Caduceus’s hand. “Relationships are what we decide they are, Caduceus.” He grinned at him. “I sound like you, right now. How did this happen?”

Caduceus couldn’t help himself and found himself grinning back, charmed. “I’m so proud of you,” he said.

“Hold on,” Fjord said, “I have an idea.” He released Caduceus’s hand and climbed out of bed, and Caduceus blinked, puzzled.

He watched, utterly flabbergasted, as Fjord began to pull at the side of the bed, dragging apart the two twin beds that they had shoved together two nights ago at the inn when they’d arrived in Zadash. A few moments later, the beds were separate once more.

“What—” Caduceus said. “You didn’t have to do that so late at night.”

“You need to sleep,” Fjord said stubbornly, returning to Caduceus’s side. “Your needs are important too, Caduceus.” He leaned in to press a kiss against his lips, soft pressure and a tiny bite of tusks. Caduceus chased the kiss when Fjord tried to pull away, yanking him back to keep him there a bit longer. He was really getting fond of kisses.

They pulled apart slowly, somewhat reluctantly. Caduceus smiled at Fjord. “You’re a miracle,” he said.

“You haven’t been sleeping, your brain’s addled,” Fjord said with a laugh, tousling Caduceus’s hair, his eyes so fond that Caduceus leaned in to kiss him again before making his way over to the other bed. Fjord lay back down in his and turned to face Caduceus, the two of them watching each other across the gap in the floor. “I’m letting you sleep in,” Fjord told him.

“I probably will need it,” Caduceus confessed. His eyelids were already heavy, now that he was horizontal and had the space he needed to spread out comfortably. A few moments later, he drifted off into sleep, the last image in his mind still Fjord, smiling back at him from the other bed.

A few days later…

For the first time since they’d begun to sleep apart, Caduceus found himself blinking awake in the morning hours earlier than Fjord, who was still snuffling softly in his sleep in the other bed. He felt amazingly refreshed. He was getting enough sleep, all his spells were back, and his relationship with Fjord felt stronger than ever.

He climbed out of bed, ready to start his day, when his eyes lit on Fjord’s sleeping form and an idea struck him. Instead of putting on his armor and heading out to find food, he gently climbed into the other bed with Fjord instead, careful not to wake him as he positioned himself around him and cuddled up to him, wrapping his arms around him. Fjord made a small, contented noise and burrowed into him.

Caduceus took the opportunity to meditate, enjoying the comforting feeling of Fjord against him and thanking the Wildmother for this gift.

Eventually, Fjord slowly came awake in his arms. When he saw Caduceus curled around him, he grinned, wide and guileless. “The one thing I missed,” he said, leaning up to cup Caduceus’s face in his palm, “was waking up with you.”

“Relationships are what we decide they are,” Caduceus echoed Fjord’s words from their conversation several nights before. “As long as I’m awake, I like sharing a bed with you.”

Fjord smiled again, eyes bright, and pulled him down for a kiss.

Give me a dialogue prompt!

#fjorclay #teahaw #critical role fanfic #cr fanfic #critical role fic #cr fic #caduceus clay #cr fjord #fjord #critical role #my fics #writing #memes #asks #bonitabreezy

[acerine]

Can I request a naruto x reader? Where she’s apart of team 7 and her and naruto was dating but they fight and break up. Which causes her to get depressed and develop an eating disorder and everyone gets worried when she shows up to train bc she looks sickly and her bones stick out badly. Just angst with happy ending? (You don’t have to write it if you’re uncomfortable with this topic. I suffer from anorexia and it’s hard to find stories on this topic. I do understand if you don’t wanna write it)

Hold Me

Pairing: Naruto x Reader

Warnings: Angst, eating disorder, like one cuss word

A/N: I don't have a problem with writing about disorders but I just get worried that i’m not portraying them properly, please reach out to someone if you are suffering. aaaand that ending wasn't as happy as I wanted but I think it works. 

I don't have much knowledge on anorexia so im so sorry if I didn't write about it properly. 

masterlist

uzumaki naruto

You groaned and plopped yourself on a bench near the entrance to the village, exhausted from the search for your boyfriend. He had dashed off immediately after training was finished without a word to you; again. You were getting worried due to how often this was happening, especially worried because he had been speaking to you less -- the only time you really saw him was during Team 7 training. You had asked Sasuke and Kakashi if they knew where he was going but they seemed to be just as clueless as you.

Looking up and seeing the sun set, you decided it was time to head home. He’d tell you whatever was troubling him eventually; you could only hope at least. “Nope -- don’t doubt him, he's never given you a reason to.” you softly mumbled to yourself, but the creeping heaviness in your heart told you otherwise.

As you walked through the village you felt your stomach grumble, the exhaustion from training and searching finally catching up to you. You decided to stop by Ichiraku’s -- it was on the way to your house and their ramen is rejuvenating, especially after gruesome training with Sasuke. shudder. He certainly gives training his all, the developing bruises were proof of that.

“Naruto that’s your 3rd bowl!” a voice giggled, bringing you back to reality.

Did they just say Naruto? Of course your boyfriend would be here! Why didn't you think of checking Ichiraku’s first? You quietly chuckled to yourself as you walked towards the voices, excited to finally see your boyfriend and share some ramen with him. But you certainly weren't expecting to see your boyfriend with his arm around Sakura nor did you expect to see how close their faces were

...

“Naruto...what are you doing?” your voice cracked slightly. Naruto and Sakura both halted their movements. Slowly he turned his head to gaze at you, “W-What are you doing here Y/n?”

Sakura looked guilty and avoided your gaze; immediately letting you know that she was aware of your relationship and what she was doing. “No seriously, what are you doing here with her?” you forced out, the strain in your voice becoming less evident, your anger overpowering your sadness.

“I was just catching up with Sakura, I haven't seen her since she started working with the other medical ninja!” He yelled out in an attempt to defend himself, his eyes darting away from you to his bowl. “Y/n calm down...it’s not what it looks like.” Sakura softly spoke. You scoffed, “Then why cant either of you look at me?”

No response.

After a minute of silence you had had enough, “Okay well don't stop on my behalf. Have fun with Sakura, Naruto.” Turning around, you began to walk away before feeling a grip on your upper arm, “Wait what's that supposed to mean?”

“Im pretty sure you know what it means.” Ripping your arm away from his grasp you sluggishly began your walk home, your body in pain from training and from your aching heart.

...

You closed the door behind you, locking it, and diving face-first onto your couch. The events from before finally registering in your head. Soft sobs began to fill the empty room and the couch pillows became stained with tears. What did she have that you didn't? You knew he used to have a crush on her when he was younger but you thought he outgrew it. Hell, you thought she had a crush on Sasuke, since when has she been interested in Naruto? Your mind was filled with questions.

Your stomach grumbled once again, this time louder than before. You didn't have the energy to get up and make yourself anything -- you weren't even sure if you even had food at home. Moving into a sitting position you glanced at the kitchen before getting up and heading to your room, you could eat in the morning after you slept off today’s events.

...

You woke up and slowly got ready for training; not mentally prepared to face Naruto after your break up. You felt a pang in your chest at the thought of his name -- making you aware of how difficult training was going to be. You sighed and began to make your way to the training grounds, taking a look at the kitchen. The last time you ate was yesterday morning but you felt fine, although the painful growl said otherwise. Shaking your head, you moved towards the door and left.

...

Naruto hadn’t showed up to training today. Kakashi said he had gone on a year training mission with Jiraiya. How convenient. They could both tell something was off between you two. “How about we cancel practice today? I think we deserve a day off.” Sasuke rolled his eyes at Kakashi, “And what are we supposed to do while you read a crappy book?”

“How about you two be actual teenagers for once?” Kakashi grumbled before heading off, leaving you and Sasuke alone with nothing to do. “Well since the moron and Kakashi aren’t here do you want to train with me?” Sasuke was pretty hardcore when it came to training — seriously, this kid did not know how to hold back. Training was life or death with him but you didn’t know what else you could possibly do on your free time other than wallow in your self pity, so you agreed.

Yeah, let’s just say you were better off moping in your room.

...

Your body felt so weak from training, the only fuel being emitted into your body came from a banana. You were constantly burning away calories and weren’t eating enough to refill them but you just couldn’t bring yourself to eat a proper meal. After finding Naruto and Sakura 12 months ago, you hadn’t felt hungry. Sure your body was weak and your stomach growled occasionally but you weren’t hungry. You hated how everyone said otherwise.

“Y/N are you sure you’re not hungry? You’re starting to look like a pile of bones...”

“Seriously, i think you should eat something.”

“Your movements are becoming sluggish, fix it.”

It was all you heard now. You felt fine. You looked fine. Why was everyone freaking out? Was it because you lost a bit of weight?!

Annoyed, you began to make your way to the meet Kakashi and Sasuke. Today would be the day Naruto returned and you just wanted to get it over with. Once you arrived all you were met with the usual concerned gazes from Kakashi, an indifferent Sasuke, but now you were met with a new pair of eyes. He looked good. Really good. 

Fuck, you couldn’t do this. “You know what...i’m not feeling too hot right now so i’m going to head on home.” Your words tumbling out as you spun around, ready to return the way you came. But your legs crumbled from underneath you, too weak to fully support you anymore. You could hear Kakashi and Sasuke’s cries of concern but you couldn’t focus on them, you could only focus on the one person you didn’t want to. “Woah, what’s wrong?!” Came his frantic voice — his arms capturing your frame before you could fully hit the ground.

Don’t touch me. Don’t touch me. Don’t touch me.

You knew he could feel your bones, your oversized shirt no longer able to hide your secret. His eyes hardened before picking you up and carrying you to your house. You felt so tired and it felt like this was a dream. Everything was so hazy and you couldn’t fully comprehend what was going on. Did you actually collapse at the training field or did you hallucinate that? You couldn’t tell anymore.

But his hold on you felt real. His scent smelled real. What was he doing carrying you, you two broke up because he decided to get cozy with another girl.

Before you knew it you were being laid on your bed, “I’m going to go get some food, just...wait for me okay?” His voice cracked. Why did his voice crack? “Yeah uh okay...” Why were you agreeing to what he was saying? You watched as he walked away from your room, “What is going on?” you softly mumbled to yourself, attempting to regain your sense of reality. Staring up at the ceiling, you didn’t realize how much you changed in the year that you two broke up. Yeah okay maybe you lost some weight, and maybe you only left your room when it was time for training or missions, but was it really that odd? 

You saw Naruto coming back into your room and sat on the bed -- it dipping under his sudden weight. He had made you some soup, surprisingly not ramen, and held the spoon up to your lips, “Eat it.” You couldn't bring yourself to argue with him so you complied. The only sounds surrounding you two were the clanging of the spoon against the bowl and your small gulps. Your stomach felt warm, you had forgotten the feeling of a full stomach. 

A choked sob captured your attention. You looked up away from the bowl held in front of you and saw the tears streaming down your ex-boyfriend’s face. “Im sorry for doing this to you. I wouldn't have left if I knew this would happen.” His voice shakily cried out. You didn't know what to do, was your condition really that bad? He set the bowl onto your nightstand and cradled your cheek, his other hand wiping at his tears. “I’m so sorry.” He continuously cried out. 

The hand on your cheek felt warm, it was nice. Both of his hands now wiped at your cheeks, you hadn't realized you were crying but he was wiping your tears away for you. 

Maybe you were broken, maybe it was his fault, who could say? You pulled him into the bed with you and he held you in his arms -- he made you feel like you would be okay, he made you feel safe again. Sure you two had a long way to go before you could trust him but for now you were happy just being with him. Like it was before that day last year. 

“Please just hold me.”

#Naruto x reader #Naruto imagines #naruto imagine #naruto shippuden imagines #naruto shippuden imagine #naruto shippuden x reader

[beni-draw-ikemen-please]

EYES NOSE LIPS CH 2

I’m sorry I didn’t put effort into world building and explaining how everyone looks >.< Idk, I just assumed you don’t really need to if you’re writing fan fiction. But, as I go along, I’ll try. Just so even if you don’t play the game, you’d still get a solid understanding of everything. I’ll also add notes at the end of the chapter~ 

Thank you so much for reading!

EYES NOSE LIPS

Chapter 2 

Asami could hear his voice. Faint and distant. “Kantokusei~!”  His voice approached with the cool breeze. 

At the same time, she could feel the vibration coming from her phone’s alarm. 

“Heeey~ It’s almost time to wake up~!” A lively voice called out to her, while a soft paw landed on her shoulder. Asami opened her eyes— her vision still light and blurry — but she could make out the bright colour of Ace’s hair and Grim’s mischievous smile. 

“Thanks for waking me…” Asami rubbed her eyes as she slowly pushed herself off the grass. She gently straightened her skirt down, dusting off bits of grass and dust. Just as they were about to leave the row of trees, Asami glanced back at the spot where she slept. Grim and Ace teased her unusual napping habits as they walked towards the main building towards the classrooms. Faintly remembering the scent of something that resembled lemongrass— or maybe, it was pine. 

She tilted her head trying to remember what she dreamt of during her short but deep nap; but her attempts were unsuccessful. All that was left was the tenderness on her lips. 

****

“Oh yeah, come to think of it. Did you owe Kingscholar-senpai money?” Deuce casually asked just as the teacher left. 

One more class to go and the day’s done. Asami could feel the cumulative stress of walking on eggshells and sleepless nights creeping up on her. 

Her eyes would sometimes blur, and it was becoming harder to concentrate during classes. 

Deuce leaned towards the table, his arms supported his chin as he turned towards the prefect. Worried eyes focusing on her. “You can borrow my notes, I didn’t think you were able to follow most of the things Trein-sensei was talking about today.” Deuce slid his notebook towards Asami with a smile. 

“Thanks, Deuce.” Asami continued to rub her eyes. They felt hot and irritated. Clearly from the lack of sleep. “I haven’t been sleeping much.” 

Asami tucked Deuce’s notebook into her bag. She suddenly remembered his initial question and turned to him tilting her head in confusion. Asami could feel her brows curling — confusion on her face obvious as she blinked, waiting for Deuce’s explanation. 

“Owe Leona-senpai…. Money?” She couldn’t recall ever asking Madol from anyone these past few days. For a moment, Asami could feel fear creeping up on the hairs of her back. “Did I?” she was becoming less and less confident about what she did and didn’t do in the previous days. 

Working at the Mostro Lounge, attending classes, making food and helping with Savanaclaw chores. It’s no wonder she would lose track of things. 

“You should’ve seen his face during lunch time. He stormed into the cafeteria looking for you.” Ace who was sitting in front, turned to face them, elbows resting in front of the prefect as he casually joined the conversation. 

“‘WHERE IS THE HERBIVORE WOMAN?!’ He said” Ace sighed a heavy breath, whilst rubbing his shoulders together for comfort after feeling the chilling weight of his terrible Leona impersonation. Leona scared the brains out of their leisurely lunch break without any warnings or greetings. The grumble of his voice and the way he rolled his eyes at them haunted him until afternoon classes. 

Asami’s eyes widened in interest. Her cheeks sporting a shy pink. 

“He… was looking for me?” 

Knowing that Leona Kingscholar was actually looking for her made Asami stand up and dash outside the classroom. But she came back after a second; putting her hands together in front of her as a gesture of thanks for lending her notes, Asami dashed once again. Thankfully, the last period was announced as a free period. Ace, Deuce, and Grim waved at her for good luck. 

She didn’t know why he was looking for her, but Asami ran towards the third years’ corridor to look for him with her heart pounding. Adrenaline filled her. Excitement? Impulse? Whatever dictated her legs to walk as fast as she could without running couldn’t be named at the moment. Whatever it was, whatever he needed, she wanted to hear it from him herself. Even if he was angry about something, Asami didn’t think she’d mind. 

Asami’s eyes were wide and curious with anticipation; like a toddler discovering what power crayons held for the very first time. What a curious little bird she was. Her curiosity slowly forming into excitement drew a smile on her face as she brisk walked towards the other side of the school main building. 

Just as she turned to the corner, her lack of focus and surplus of elation caused her to bump at something — rather, someone. Someone tall and bulky. 

Bumping her nose and just as she was about to fall, this someone grabbed her arm, preventing a hard fall on her back. Her eyes squinted with the sudden pain she felt on her nose and forehead. “I’m so sorry…” She whispered, slowly peeling her eyes open, the tall dark figure looked at her with a worried face. 

“Are you okay, Kantokusei?” Asami had to blink a few seconds for her eyes to settle on the tall figure in front of her. Jack helped her stand up straight and lowered his head to see if her face was injured. 

“Jack?” Asami was finally able to tell who she bumped into. “Thanks for catching me.” Asami rubbed her forearm gently after Jack released his tight grip. Better than her falling on the floor. 

Asami bowed in apology for bumping into him. It’s hard to believe that  a guy as big as Jack was also a freshman like her. They would often have classes together and because of her situation at Savanaclaw, they’ve gotten incredibly close during the past week. 

Asami looked at him embarrassed. Her head continued to bow in apology but Jack paid it no mind. He was more worried about her. 

Asami suddenly remembered why she was rushing and asked Jack if he’d seen the Savanaclaw dorm leader. Briefly mentioning that he was with them during the first few minutes of lunch break but he decided to go someplace else and haven’t seen him since. 

Asami’s Leona-hunting high wore off after the bump. And somehow, the feeling of exhaustion doubled even after she took a nap during lunch. Maybe, it was time to get a proper good night’s rest.

****

Even though the prefect and Grim were enrolled as one student, it still didn’t help that she couldn’t use magic. And to participate in almost all the classes, you needed to use magic. Most of the time Asami would have half of the homework load, and Grim would stay behind to attend extra classes along with Deuce and Ace. She’d usually spend most of her free time walking around the school, or helping the headmaster with paperwork, or reading in the library. 

Spells and herbal medicine piqued her interest. And even without any magical energy, she still enjoyed reading about them. Spells structure and ingredients were her favourite. She would often lend her notes to the rest of the guys in class. She liked feeling that she was useful.

They had about three days left before they could return to their dorm. Fortunately, Asami was able to finish almost everything on Azul’s to-do list. Errands throughout the day, working part time in Mostro Lounge, and delivering messages to students. She felt excited to go back to ‘normal’. 

What is normal? She thought to herself. She’d been feeling lethargic and exhausted, but at the same time, she’s also having a lot of fun spending time with everyone. Cooking for the residents of Savanaclaw, helping Ruggie with chores, spending time with Jack, and learning more about life in Night Raven College. 

Her new life now felt normal. It was as if staying in Leona’s room was now just as natural as going to class. Aside from the occasional growls, grunts and eye rolling, she’s picked up most of his habits and took mental notes. 

Things like, how he doesn’t wear neckties or a blazer. But his white shirt and yellow vest would always be freshly pressed. His accessories would often be lying around and would sometimes break because he doesn’t take them off even as he is about to sleep. Despite how he looks, his hair is actually really silky and soft. How he doesn’t eat his vegetables. And how, at the end of the day, when she’s just cleaning up around the kitchen, she would find the lunchbox she made for him empty, already washed and dry.  That bit — even if she knew there was a possibility Ruggie cleaned it— the small chance that Leona enjoyed what she made, made her smile. Through the days, she was able to slowly get used to him and his presence— something she’s been actively avoiding for the past week and a half. 

She noticed little things. Little things about him that made her chuckle. Little things that made her relax around him. But not everything. She missed on a few small points. 

Asami made it to the dorms alone as Grim was stuck with Crewel’s extra classes. Somehow the trio’s been the teacher’s favourite and they’ve been staying behind for extra classes almost daily. 

The Savanaclaw dorms are usually not that busy after school—empty even. Since most of the residents often have club activities after classes. Most of Savanaclaw are outgoing who really only stay at the dorms during meal times and during the nights. 

The empty hallways filled with greenery felt serene to Asami and she enjoyed walking along the stone halls. On the fourth floor, the last room by the lone corridor with the best view of the pool and the sunset, was Leona’s room.

Asami knocked twice to see if Leona was back in his room. But there was no response. 

The room was dark with orange lights peeking through the closed blinds. The veranda doors that were usually open to welcome in the breeze were closed. Asami didn’t bother turning the lights on and she sighed in relief to see the room empty. And quiet. It’s been a while since she had a room to herself. 

Asami felt the weight of her legs take her to sit on top of Leona’s bed. Her heavy eyelids somehow amplified the scent of the room. Leona’s scent. Thinking about how she’s staying in the same room as someone like him made her throat feel dry. Her skin tingled as she took a deep breath; running her hands on his sheets. Her heavy eyelids somehow gave her the courage to actually picture him in her head. His sleeping figure, his dark hair sprayed all over the pillows; his low mumbles and moans. His emerald eyes in the dark. Slowly, climbing up—

No.

She thought about how maybe, that’s the reason why she’d wake up and spend the night out in the lounge by the pool.

Just the thought of someone like Leona Kingscholar, sleeping in the same room, made her insides feel things she’s never felt before. Her chest felt heavy and Asami could hear her heart drumming through her ears. 

Leona-senpai…

She allowed herself to call out to him. Silently spelling his name with heavy sighs. 

But at that moment, as she took in a deep breath, her eyes felt too hot and her body was too heavy to even try and recognise the feeling inside her. With a long and satisfying yawn, she let herself relax on his bed. 

Asami felt her eyelids begging for a goodnight sleep. And for a moment, she stopped thinking about anything else, and she let herself fall asleep.  

The scent of Leona and his name cradled her to sleep. 

****

Leona Kingscholar could be categorised as one of the best students in Night Raven College. But his potential comes hand-in-hand with disinterest, and slothful behaviour that even caused him to repeat a year. 

Skipping too many classes and only taking the final exams, no matter how great a wizard you may be, wasn’t tolerated in NRC. He sat through half of Trein’s nagging after school and somehow made it alive. Ruggie was kind enough to excuse him out of the miserable lecture. 

“That was horrific… What a pain—” Leona rubbed the back of his ear with a gloved hand whilst Ruggie chuckled behind him. He was hungry but more than that, he was so sleepy he could pass out right there. 

Leona finally reached the door of his room as just as Ruggie was about to say something, at the same moment he opened the door, the two of them stopped when they saw Asami sleeping soundly on Leona’s bed. 

“Ara—” Ruggie scratched his head and chuckled a bit. “What should we do, Leona-san?” turning to the dark-haired prince, Ruggie offered to remove her. 

It was Leona’s bed after all. But Leona raised a gloved hand. For a moment, he was quiet. 

“Where’s the fur ball?” His eyes did not leave the sleeping figure. His voice was the lowest and quietest Ruggie had ever heard. For the first time in a long time, Leona Kingscholar was speaking ever so softly because someone else was asleep in his presence. That could only mean one thing, Ruggie thought. Leona Kingscholar himself, was being considerate. 

Ruggie whispered back, “Remedial Classes” His eyebrows curiously raised to see what the next words Leona would speak.  His eyes anticipating his response. 

“Ruggie... “ Leona spoke low and slow. His eyes glued to the sleeping figure on his bed. A heavy breath after every word. 

After a few seconds of silence, Leona entered the room silently whilst slowly closing the door. Just before he shut the door, his eyes turned to face Ruggie. 

“You stay with the raccoon tonight.” With that, the door shut, and Ruggie heard the lock click. Ruggie turned to leave and raised his hands in defeat. His eyebrows relax in relief. 

“At least, someone’s honest for once.” he chuckled a low chuckle and left the hallway leading to Leona’s room. 

*****

Now this was a familiar sight. Almost too familiar. 

Leona Kingscholar was a man of logic and reason — and he will be the first one to turn away from a difficult situation. But this was one of the few times he felt cornered and trapped. He sighed a deep sigh, an almost growl quietly escaping his lips.  He stood just by the door unmoving. His eyes examined the room, and then returned examining the sleeping figure that had caught him off guard. 

Asami was on her side; her hands relaxed in front of her face — however, half of her legs were still on the floor. Leona could tell she didn’t intend to sleep on his bed. She’d been avoiding him all week after all. He called out to her to see if she would respond. The softest and lowest voice he could try, “Oi…” With a raised eyebrow, Leona waited for a response. 

No luck. 

Leona calmed himself. He took quick breaths to relax the tension away. 

She’s just a girl. He thought to himself. Slowly walking towards the side of the bed. Leona looked at Asami’s sleeping figure. Dark faint circles hung above her cheeks and her face slightly flushed. The dark room grew darker as the sun continued to take away its orange glowy light. She was like a polished gem resting on the velvet sheets that was his bed. Nowhere were those carnelian eyes— but the sight of her; the contrast of her dark hair and long lashes on her pale skin, looked like there was a radiance that was only around her. Her breathing was the only thing audible in the room now. And Leona slowly let himself sit down beside the sleeping figure. Listening closely to her soft breaths. Allowing himself to become part of the scenery that was her. He could feel himself relax as he sat there. 

Slowly, he allowed himself to shift, and let his back lean on the head board; his one leg planted on the floor, while the other leg folded in front of him. His head leaned back a bit, but eyes never left Asami. He sighed, another heavy sigh as he watched her sleeping face. 

Her scent mixed with the comforting scent he had on his bed; the sheets smelled like him, the pillows smelled like him. But now, he has an intruder. An intruder he willingly let in. He found comfort in the rhythm of her breaths. He felt his tensed muscles relax at the sight of her. How the strands of her hair fell on her cheek, how her lips glistened at the remaining light that was left in his room. How her neck bared itself as her hair fell on the back of her collar. 

Leona Kingscholar was a man of logic and reason. But the next moments he did weren’t governed by logic nor reason and he didn’t bother identifying that force. 

With the softest movements and the quietest shift on the bed, Leona let his hands reach her. His gloved hand tracing her index finger ever so lightly, ever so softly and ever so quietly. Pulling his hand back, he waited to see if she would wake up. 

But after a few minutes, Leona made the conclusion that this girl was too tired to notice his presence. 

He felt himself gulp as he quietly removed his gloves and vest and threw them on the carpeted floor. Leona then slowly and very very carefully lifted Asami’s sleeping figure so she was lying properly on the bed. He found himself gently removing her indoor slippers, blazer and necktie, setting them aside neatly. 

Leona watched Asami’s sleeping figure like a predator in the night. 

Careful and deliberate—watchful. But there was gentleness there. Careful, intentional and for a moment, loving. With his arm supporting his head, he relaxed himself next to her. He took in deep breaths, memorising her scent; the scent of her hair— the same sweet scent of shampoo, hints of the sun, the faintest trail of sweat— the scent he could sniff from the littlest bare skin from the small of her neck. 

He wouldn’t admit it to himself, but there was a mighty need growing inside of him. Something urgent stuck in his throat. A want to be constantly around her grew inside Leona. 

For the first time, Leona gently placed his hand to cup her cheek with his bare hands. He could instantly feel the warmth through his fingertips. With each breath she took, he let his finger caress her face, with the gentlest touch, without making a sound. His finger in tune with her breaths, as if masking them so she wouldn’t notice. Masking them so she would stay asleep. Masking them so he could enjoy the sight of her. Leona found himself syncing with her breaths; his lion senses enveloped by this new presence— her presence. 

A predator completely enamored by his prey. His emerald eyes traced even the slight shift of her head to face him. 

How dare she, he thought to himself.

How dare you fall asleep on my bed — and make me feel this way. 

Leona cursed himself for choosing this predicament; his entire character seemed to just jump out the window when he saw her sleeping on his bed. He was not one to stick his nose in difficult situations. He took pride in being the best in avoiding them, in fact. For a moment, he felt his brain black out.

But he also knew better. 

With the quietest heavy sigh, he convinced himself to relax a little bit once more. But just as he finally did, Asami schooched herself closer to him, her face almost burying into his chest. Leona’s emerald eyes glimmered in interest. He didn’t notice it, but his cheeks turned into a deep blush. That blush on his cheeks was invisible in the darkness of the room, and will always be a secret only known by Asami’s sleeping face. And for him, how silly she scrunched her nose every now and then would be the secret he’d keep in return. 

As the night devoured the whole Savanaclaw dorm, Leona’s world can only be described by only one thing — her. Who would expect the genius, Leona Kingscholar, the second prince of the Savanna, would find himself trapped within a little girl’s sleeping grasp. Her hands tightly clinging on to his shirt. Leona didn’t want to allow it, he didn’t want to succumb — but that night already held too many secrets, what would adding one more do?

Leona held Asami tight — his hands now familiar with the shape of her neck, and the smallness of her shoulders. His hands found solace in the small of her back. He allowed himself, for the last time, to take in her scent. With a soft kiss towards her head, Leona Kingscholar felt a smirk on his face, as he inhaled her — as much as he could — for now, at the very least, before his eyes slowly drifted to a deep sleep. 

*****

“Hey…” A rasped and familiar voice lazily called out to her. Asami’s eyes fluttered open — her vision still white and blurry. The sun leaked from the window into the carpeted floor through the half-lifted blinds. Someone was standing near the bed. Bare chest, towel on their head. 

As her eyes settled as she rubbed them, the figure sat on the bed— the smell of shampoo and soap filling her senses. 

“Oi—”  

Asami was just about to greet them ‘good morning’ when she was jolted by her own realization that it was Leona Kingscholar who was sitting by the bed. His bed. No, she’s the one who is on his bed. 

Asami stood up nervously bowing her head in apology. A deep shade of pink filling her pale cheeks. “I- I’m so sorry, dorm leader….” Asami kept her head on a low bow. A scratchy and dry gulp filling her throat as she awaited her punishment, or at least a scowl — a growl. Something. 

She couldn’t recall preparing for bed, or making the futons, or waking up early to make lunch boxes and as she lowered her head to see if her futon was moved, she was surprised to see it untouched, while Leona’s bed was messed up. Leona didn’t say anything as he was busy drying his hair. 

But he stood up once more, and got a big fresh towel from his dresser. 

“You should get ready for school. Or you’ll be late too.” Leona faced away, the towel covering most of his face and head. But his shoulders hunched forward as his elbows rested on his knees. His voice was gentle — low and gentle. Asami bowed to take the towel and thanked Leona silently. 

But just as she was headed outside, to use the dorm showers, a low growl finally escaped Leona’s lips. 

“Where do you think you’re going?”  

Asami shrieked. Her shoulders suddenly tighten with the hitch in her breath. 

“It’ll be full after morning practice. You can use the shower here—” Leona’s eyes were closed, Asami could feel that he was relaxed. This was the first time she’s ever been alone with him, like this. But for a moment, she was relieved.

She nervously got ready for school.

Did they sleep together? 

Did he sleep somewhere else?

Please don’t tell me I made Leona-senpai sleep on the floor. 

Countless things ran inside Asami’s head as she tried to relax under the hot steamy water. She felt well-rested and invigorated. She’s been sleep-deprived and must have passed out while cleaning up the room. Her cheeks turned a brighter shade of pink as she listed the possibilities. 

Nothing was wrong with her body. No pain, no marks — nothing. 

Just as she closed her eyes to relax herself, she heard Leona’s voice from the other side of the shower curtain. 

“Hurry up — we’ll be late!” Leona growled his usual growl. But somehow, it feels nice to hear him like this. The first time she’s alone with Leona Kingscholar and they are both getting ready together. Asami’s nervousness was slowly replaced by an unnamed feeling—close to bliss— and it filled her chest. As she stepped out of the shower, she found a fresh set of shirt, skirt and a new blazer waiting for her. Asami checked to see if Leona was still around, and she was surprised to see the room empty. 

She got dressed, checked the time and went on her way. 

As she opened the door, she bumped into Leona who was standing just by the door. 

“It’s about damn time…” he scowled, rubbing the back of his head. 

“Let’s go” 

Leona walked and Asami followed a few steps behind. Her eyes examining the area, seemingly looking for something or someone. Leona noticed her head looking out to different directions and he sighed. “Everyone’s gone ahead. Your furball is with Ruggie and Jack.” He spoke slowly, a relaxed tone calming Asami’s worries. 

She felt nervous, but soon the nervousness melted away. Something about the way Leona spoke to her, the thoughtful way he waited for her to finish getting ready, and the assurance that Grim wasn’t left behind or lost made her smile. 

That moment gave her the courage to call out to him. 

“Leona-senpai…” Leona looked back at her with a raised eyebrow. Leona’s shoulders relaxed back as he stopped in his tracks. 

Asami bathed in all of Savanaclaw’s morning daylight and for a moment, Leona felt his eyes widened. He was stopped in his tracks, by this little girl. She looked as if she was shining. Her smile immobilised his frustrations and impatience. 

“Good morning.” She smiled, a light shade of pink tinting her face. Leona took a deep breath, and sighed all the almost-feelings out. But just as he turned to his heel to continue walking, Asami heard the lowest, gentlest “Good morning.” from him, and that was enough to give her enough energy to face the day. 

To be continued....

More Notes:

What is Madol?  - It’s like the in-game currency. ;)

Mostro Lounge? - This is a sort of café/lounge/bar area under the sea run by Azul and the Leech brothers. Because Asami can’t use her magic as collateral for making the deal with Azul, she handed over their dorm, the Ramshackle Dorm instead. She also works there part time after school~ >.< 

Night Raven College - the school of Magic

This work is also up on AO3 ~ My username is onibeni ^ ^

I’m working on Asami’s character sheet and I have a lot lot lot of Leona art coming so O A O I mostly post them on twitter :p beni_onibeni is my main account and beni_twist is my TW dump :p Thank you so much for reading! 

#Twisted Wonderland #Twisted Wonderland OC #leona kingscholar #Onibeni #Twisted Leona

[superthiccthighssavelives]

Angsty Prompts

Alright @primaba11erina, here is part 1/2 of your prompts.

It’s long af, so I had to split it into 2 pieces, it’s really sad honestly, and my heart hurts from writing it, but hopefully this is what you wanted from them. ❤

Please listen to:

*Ocean Eyes - Billie Ellish*

*Everything to Help You Sleep - Julien Baker*

*The Beach - The Neighbourhood*

(and whatever heartwrenching music you have to get into the mood)

The 2 prompts from the angsty list are in bold

48- “You’re hurting me”

49- “Please just let me go”

@alyss--in--wonderland, @linseykalynn, @jolovesfandoms and whoever else wants to read it.

I’m 3 months into my first semester at college, and I’m completely miserable. I missed my family, I missed my friends, and I especially missed my boyfriend. I knew it was going to be hard, without everyone, but not this hard. I walked around with a black cloud over my head, I couldn’t sleep, I lived off black coffee and my best friend was a tube of concealer. 

My boyfriend, Taron, and I had been together since middle school, ya know the innocent puppy love, developing into a more serious relationship. We were always together, we never fought, well rarely, it was so easy with him. He was my best friend. We barely talk. Between classes, studying, sleep?, and everything else, it’s usually twice a week. A quick goodnight here and there, and maybe facetime on the weekend. This sucks. I haven’t even seen him since I left.

He stayed back in London, going to a drama school. His talent was too good to pass this opportunity up. We agreed before I left to make sure nothing would change, we both cried like babies, and couldn’t let one another go. After a few hours, I had to tear myself away or I’d end up staying. 

Now, 3 months later, I feel like we’re strangers. It may be naive to think that we could keep this relationship from destructing, especially being so young, but, we really do have an amazing thing going. Or did. I tried to concentrate on school, but as time passed, and more time passes, my thoughts get farther and farther away from that, and are planted in worry and ...that uncomfortable, writhing, anxiety ridden feeling in my stomach.

It’s Friday, and I’m about to finish my last class. I wish I could go home for the weekend, maybe take a day or two off after, to see my mom, my sister, and Taron. I don’t even think we’ve talked in a week, the anxiety was building back up again. We basically were playing phone tag, he’d call when he was free, but I was in class, I’d call him but he’d be in rehearsal. I hate this. I hate this so goddamn much. 

I drag myself back to the dorms, skipping the coffee, I just want to sleep. I feel like a snail, I’m practically crawling back. Halfway down the hall, I see someone standing by my door. My eyesight is terrible, I can’t see anything more than 6 feet in front of me. I try to focus my gaze, figuring it was another dude my roommate was banging. As I get closer, my heart speeds up, I see him, my boyfriend, and I very nearly knock him over as I plow into him with a hug. 

“Oh my god, what are you doing here?”

He smiled, god, I love his smile, I missed it.

“Surprise!”

I felt tears welling up in my eyes, I couldn’t believe it. He was really here. 

All I could do was stare at him, study his face, the color of his eyes, his pink lips, the way the front of his hair has a little curl to it. I barreled myself into him again, squeezing as hard as I could. I don’t care if we just stay like this for however long he’s here, I don’t want to let him go. 

He pulled back, placing his hands on either side of my face. 

“Are you alright sweetheart?” 

I sniffled, realizing I had actual tears dripping down my face. 

“I just, I really missed you.” “I’m so glad you’re here.”

“I was going crazy not being able to talk to you, I’ve been miserable.” “My mam got sick of me, I was kind of being a dick, so she bought me a bus ticket to come for the weekend.”

I grabbed his hand, pulling him into my room. My legs were starting to get weak, the walk to the dorms is a bit aways from campus, and I hadn’t slept proper in weeks. A yawn slipped out, maybe I should have grabbed that coffee after all. 

“Bored of me already?” A cheeky smile spread across his face

“Sorry, I’ve had a rough couple of weeks, I’m just a little tired.”

I moved closer, sitting on his lap, wrapping my arms around his neck, pressing my forehead to his.

“I’m so so so so so happy you’re here, I can’t even tell you how much.” I could feel my eyes watering again, I really was draining myself so much that I’d become an emotional mess. 

He wiped my stray tears away with his thumb, and gave me a gentle kiss. I wanted to stay like this forever. He felt like home, comfort, my heaven. My lips returned to his, just wanting to feel him, his body, his energy, his whole being, just close.

This feeling was so overwhelming, I stopped and just pulled him closer again, my head on his shoulder. His arms were wrapped as tight as they could be around me, rubbing my back.

He soothed me, whispering in my ear, kissing my cheek, my temple. 

Eventually I let the craziness pass, and asked what he wanted to do while he was here.

He shrugged “Really, just wanted to see you.”

I couldn’t help but smile. He brought out what I hadn’t felt in months, happiness. 

We ordered a pizza and watched movies on my laptop, while I struggled to stay awake. His body was warm, and familiar, and my eyes were drooping, and I ...was...so...tired. 

I snuggled up as close as I could get to him, his arm wrapped around me, his hand twirling around in my hair. I felt more and more relaxed as each second passed, I couldn’t fight it any longer. 

I jumped up abruptly, not knowing what day or time it was, thinking I was late for class. It took me a second as I looked at the clock that read 11:13, to figure out if it was AM or PM. 

My brain started to wake up, glancing beside me to see Taron looking at me concerned. “Are you alright love?”

“Yeah, is it morning or night?” 

“Morning, you’ve been out for 12 hours, are you sure you’re alright?”

I plopped back down, pulling him to me for a kiss, even though I’m sure my breath was terrible, I just wanted to make sure he was still there and I wasn’t dreaming. 

“Of course, I’ve not been sleeping well, and I think my body just decided to take over. I’m sorry I slept so long, is there anything you wanna see, or do today?”

“Whatever you'd like.”

I thought for a moment, unsure of where to take him. There is that bookstore/cafe I go to a lot when I need to get away from my roommate and her endless stream of men. It was late autumn, so a walk through the park to see all the beautiful colored trees and landscapes would be nice too. 

After a shower, and doing the minimum on my hair and makeup, I hurried back to my room. I didn’t want to waste any time doing anything but being with him. 

We had an amazing weekend, I took him to all my favorite places, we tried a new restaurant I’d been afraid of eating at, and crashed back at my room. We definitely made up for lost time, I forgot how incredible he felt and what he could do to me and my body. It was almost enough to make me quit school and go back home with him. 

Sunday afternoon was upon us, and I dreaded sending him off. I just hope this feeling would linger after he’s left, enough to keep me going for another month until winter break.                    

He gave me the sweetest kiss and whispered that he loved me, and then he was gone, like he was never there at all.

I had the urge to chase after the bus, and beg him to stay with me, just for a little while, but my brain was too rational and instead, I sat on a nearby bench and text him all the things I couldn’t say before he left. Have a safe trip, text me when you get there, thank your mom for me, I already miss you, I can’t wait until winter break…

The next month plodded along, it felt like a damn eternity. I worked extra hard on my assignments, I needed the distraction. I packed as much as would fit in my suitcase and took a taxi to the bus station. It took a few hours to get home, which of course, felt like days, I just wanted to relax for a few weeks. My stomach was in knots with every mile closer. 

The last time I spoke to Taron was 2 weeks ago, I hadn’t gotten a moment to call him, and he must have been on the same schedule, because I’ve heard nothing from him, not even a text. 

We had one phone call the week he returned back to London, but he was distracted, at rehearsal, every time I tried to say something, he’d yell back to someone in the background, laugh, apologize, say a few words, and repeat. I’d gotten frustrated and told him to just go back to whatever he was doing, I wanted to hang up on him, but I knew I’d regret it after 5 minutes.

He seemed so distant, and after the weekend we had, I thought that would bring us closer after all that time apart. But...guess not.

I did text him a couple of days ago to remind him I’d be in on Saturday afternoon, and couldn’t wait to see him. But, no reply. I was a little upset, but really, I just wanted to get home and wrap myself around him. I’m sure there was a good explanation. 

I finally arrived, running the moment I caught a glimpse of my mom. Again, my emotions were flooding out of me and couldn’t help but cry and squeeze the living daylights out of her. 

The house looked different, but the same, that weird being away thing that affects your thinking. I text Taron, telling him I’d made it back, and was looking forward to seeing him, again. Mom made the best meal I’ve eaten in months, I caught up with my sister, going over the latest high school drama. 

I kept checking my phone, every other second, waiting, but still nothing. I was starting to worry, and run through a thousand ridiculous scenarios, which caused my awful feeling to build. 

I snuck away for a moment, and tried to call him, but it went straight to voicemail. It was becoming too late to go anywhere to see if he was home or ...who knows where. 

I felt awful, my stomach wouldn’t stop twisting, making me nauseated. I didn’t know what was happening, or why he hasn’t even contacted me in weeks. As tired as I was, I knew I wouldn’t be able to sleep, emotions, for a lack of a better word, suck.

I threw on a jacket and flittered out to sit on the front porch with a cup of coffee. I tried to pick out the constellations I could spot, text some of my friends to plan a meet up, and tried Taron again. Same straight to voicemail. I was halfway between detrimental anger and wanting to cry my eyes out. It was just about midnight, and I had no idea what to do. Everyone in the house was asleep, I felt completely alone. 

I raided the bathroom cabinet to find something to knock me out, I definitely was going to need help falling asleep. I found some allergy meds that were supposed to make you sleepy, I crossed my fingers downing 2 pills. It kinda worked, I passed out for a couple of hours, but woke up with a racing heart around 3am. My phone blinded me, lighting up with a text.

Taron - ‘See you soon xx’

I stared at the screen, waiting for more, something else, an apology, an explanation, that he missed me, anything but some generic ass, nondescript text. 

“Are you fucking kidding me?”

I threw my phone, thankfully it landed on my area rug and not the wood floor. I was so pissed. After 3 weeks, that’s all he has to say? 

My mouth was dry and I had a terrible taste on my tongue, I darted downstairs for a drink, trying my hardest not to grab caffeine. I poured a glass of milk, and grabbed some cookies, I guess I was hungry too. 

Halfway up the stairs, I almost dropped my glass when my phone started chirping, loudly. Taron.

I should ignore it, like he’s been ignoring me. I watched it for a moment, and sighed answering.

“Yes?”

“Baaaaaaabyyyyyyyy, where are you?” He was clearly drunk.

“Taron, I’m home, remember?”

“Come see me, I’m…” The sound was muffled and I heard shuffling, then laughter.

“Oops, I dropped you.”

I rolled my eyes, my anger turning red hot. He was out, getting wasted, and hasn’t even attempted to contact me. 

“Taron, It’s 3am, I’m going to bed.”

More laughter and voices in the background. 

“Taron?” “Hello?’ 

“Sorry, where are you love?”

His speech was slurred, and quick. 

“Home, in bed.”

“Bed, ooh, what are you wearing?”

“Goodnight Taron.”

I waited for him to say something, but I just heard some people in the background laughing more and mumbling things I couldn’t make out.

“Ok, bye then.” I hung up, frustrated and upset. 

A minute later, my phone was lit up with another call. I ignored it. 

And another.

He left a voicemail, I couldn’t make out half of what he was saying. 

He tried to call again. I shut off my phone and took some deep breaths to calm down. 

I woke up to the smell of bacon and pancakes. My nose carried me downstairs, only to find Taron in the kitchen with my mom, shoving a cinnamon roll into his mouth.

“Mornin sunshine!”

I glared at him, pouring myself some orange juice. He came up behind me, crossing his arms around my waist, whispering in my ear, “Missed you.” then kissing my cheek. 

Mom excused herself sensing something off.

“What are you doing here?”

His eyes bulged. “What do you mean? I wanted to see you.”

“You wanted to see me so bad that you didn’t text or call me for 3 weeks? And then wouldn’t reply to anything either? Then you call at me fucking 3am drunk?”

He sighed, rubbing his forehead. 

“Shit, I’m sorry, we had a good first show, so we celebrated.”

“Oh, good to know, maybe if I knew, I could have been there to see, but, it’s cool.”

He reached for my hand, but I withdrew, pulling my robe tighter.

“I’m sorry, I am, it’s been just really crazy lately, you know?”

“I guess.”

“Babe, come on, don’t be mad at me, please?”

He made an exaggerated sad pout, causing me to yet again roll my eyes. 

“Stop, I wanna be mad at you.”

Honestly, looking at him, and those ridiculous puppy dog eyes he was giving me, was breaking me down. 

He kissed my cheek “Come on.” *kiss* “Let’s eat.” *kiss* “I’ve missed you.” *kiss* “You look so cute with your hair a mess.” *kiss* “I’m so happy you’re home”

“Alriiiiight, stop.” He was so damn charming, he could get away with murder. I couldn’t help the grin spreading across my face. 

He kissed my lips, and grabbed my hand to lead me to the table.

We spent the next couple weeks glued to one another, the only time we were apart was a few hours on the weekends when he had a show to do, he slept over almost every night. 

I found some time to hang out with some of my girlfriends, do some shopping, catch up on our lives. I still had 3 more weeks at home, and I couldn’t have been happier, and avoiding every thought that entered my mind about going back.

Taron’s break was much shorter than mine, so time with him after that was few and far between. He did invite me to one rehearsal, that was fun. The rest of the time I just lounged as much as I could, read a few books, and mapped out my new classes. 

It was my last weekend home, thinking about going back to school was making my stomach turn. I didn’t want to leave. 

Taron took me out for a semi-fancy dinner the night before I had to head back. We, of course, again, promised each other things would be ok, and to never let more than a week go by without speaking. We had every good intention to.

We ended up at a pub for a few drinks with all our friends, I wasn’t going to see anyone again for 6 months. I didn’t want to be hungover on the long bus ride back, so I kept it to a minimum. Can’t say the same for Taron though. I had to basically carry him to the taxi and then to his doorstep. I was a little disappointed that this was our last night together, and I couldn’t even talk to him properly. I got him to his bed, covered him up and sat down beside him. His eyes were closed, but not yet passed out. I pushed his hair back from his forehead, running my fingers along his cheekbones, lips, jawline. I wanted to memorize every piece of him.

His eyes sprung open, a silly grin on his face, and pulled me down to him. “I love you.” He gave me a rough kiss on my cheek and was out for the rest of the night. I gave him a gentle kiss on his lips, took one last look and made my way out.

Another sleepless night was ahead of me, I felt different, I didn’t know exactly what ‘it’ was, but I knew it felt like a change. 

The drive to the bus station was quiet, save for the dripping rain down the windows. I hugged mom goodbye, and she promised to come visit me soon. 

Back at the dorm, it felt empty, and cold. I unpacked, and just laid in my bed staring at the ceiling. I hadn’t even looked at my phone since before I left. Of course, there were messages from him.

Taron - “Are you still here?”  12:42pm

“Please tell me I didn’t miss you leaving?” 12:55pm

“I’m so sorry, I swear, I didn’t mean for the night to go like that.” 1:14pm

“Text me, call me when you get there, please.” 1:47pm

“I miss you, it feels so empty when you’re gone.” 3:02pm

“Are you home yet?” 4:55pm

“Please call me.” 5:33pm

The last text was just my name and a sad emoji. 6:01pm

There were a few missed calls from him, and only one voicemail, no words, just a few seconds of a sigh, and a *click*

I was tired, I still had one more day before school started again, and I was going to use it for sleep. 8:35pm

I woke up too early the next morning, and needed the coffee I had been avoiding at home. I threw on whatever was visible on my floor, threw on a beanie and headed out the door. 

My phone was dead, I must have forgotten to charge it. Oh well. 

The coffee was so hot, and exactly what I needed. I took the long way back, opting for a few detours through the city. It was lightly raining, and chilly, but somehow it felt like the best thing ever at that moment.

I gazed at the dead, bare trees, the grey, gloomy sky, and the droplets of water gently plopping to the ground, it was beautiful. Even though everything was dead, decaying, it would be reborn, and more glorious than before. No, this wasn’t some metaphor for my life, or maybe it was. I don’t know. 

When I returned back to the dorms, my roommate was back, unpacking. We exchanged some light words, and she headed out, leaving me to my own devices again. I binged watched some Netflix shows, and avoided charging my phone. It was still in my handbag, and I didn’t feel like getting up. I passed out early, awaking the next morning right on time to start my new semester.

Eventually, my phone was revived, strangely it took me a few days to even bother. A few messages cascaded in, from mom, my sister, one of my friends, and only one from Taron. 

Taron - “I’m sorry.” Monday 1:37am

I called mom, assuring her everything was fine, caught up with my sister, replied to my friend, and left the last message unanswered.

I didn’t know what to say right now, and I needed more time to think before I decided to say anything. 

A few weeks passed, surprisingly that black cloud lightened, and the sun came out. I was doing extremely well in all my classes, and I had met a few new people from my dorm hall, and my psychology class. I started to go out more, enjoy life, find myself. I took an art class even though I have no artistic talent, I hoped maybe it was hidden. 

I felt a heaviness over me at times, I hadn’t replied to Taron at all. I had to eventually, either resolve it, or just ...no, I didn’t want to think about it. I was in a sort of bubble, and I didn’t want to burst it, not yet.

I dialed his number, listening to the multiple rings before his voicemail hit. 

“Hey...we need to talk, umm, yeah, call me when you get this.” I hung up before I changed my mind.

Around 9pm I heard a knock at my door. His hair, and clothes were soaked. His face was covered in worry and somberness. 

I stood there, in awe for a moment. 

“Get in here.” 

I grabbed a towel,  handing it to him. 

“What are you doing here?” This felt familiar.

He just looked at me, mouth open, taking a moment, while attempting to dry himself off.

“What’s going on?” “What’s happening?” “I’m worried.”

I sighed, I honestly had no idea what to even say. 

“Take off your clothes.”

He raised an eyebrow, looking amused.

“They’re soaked, You’re not sitting on my bed all wet.”

I dug through my drawer, finding a t-shirt and oversized pajama pants for him to put on.

“Why haven’t you answered any of my calls, or messages?” “Is everything alright?”

I remained quiet, still not sure of what was going on myself. 

“I don’t know.” was all I could come up with.

“You don’t know what?”

“Anything.”

It was quiet for a minute.

“Things aren’t the same, don’t you feel it?”

He stared, searching my eyes, trying to understand.

“I don’t know, maybe a bit.” “But life never stays the same, things always change.”

“Yeah, they do, and …” I pinched my lips, trying to figure out how to put the next sentence together. “And I think we’ve changed, too much.”

It grew quiet again.

“I’m sorry.” was the only thing that slipped from his lips. His head down, arms rested on his knees, and his hands running through his hair.

“Don’t be, I mean, it happens, as much as we don’t want it to, it happens. It’s no one’s fault” 

“How can you be so, calm?”

“I’ve had a lot of time to think. Until right now, I didn’t know what was happening, it tore me apart, it’s been ripping me to shreds for months, ever since I first came here. I missed you so much, I spent so many nights lying awake, crying, wanting to just say forget it and go back home. I was so incredibly happy when you came to visit that day, I thought if I just waited it out, things could be good again, but things never work out like we plan.”

“I’m sorry, I swear, I didn’t mean for that night to end up like it happened, I promise, I will do anything, let’s just work this out, we can figure out how to make this work.”

I shook my head, I couldn’t. Not anymore. It was killing me, everytime he leaves, or when the phone doesn’t ring for 2 weeks, I let a little piece of him break away.

“Taron, I can’t, I just, can’t.” I was feeling that nauseous feeling creeping back in, and my heart bursting into millions of pieces. 

“Please, I know we can.” He grabbed my hands, pulling me towards him. “Look at me, please.”

I was afraid to, I knew I was either going to buckle and give in, or immediately start crying. 

He tilted my head up to him, his finger under my chin. He went on and on, trying to convince me we could make it work, that we can schedule times to talk, and we’ll visit every other weekend.

I couldn’t take it anymore, my eyes betrayed me, spilling salty tears down my cheeks.

“Taron, stop, you’re hurting me, please just let me go.”

I could barely get the words out, I was out of breath, I felt ill, I couldn’t stop bawling.

I turned away, trying to calm myself. He came around to face me, placing his hands on my face, gazing deep into my eyes. “I’m so sorry, I never meant to hurt you, I’m sorry.” Tears were forming in his eyes, making them glisten. He gave me one last lingering kiss on my forehead, grabbed his things and walked out the door. 

#angsty prompt #writing #fiction #fanfiction #taron egerton fic #taron egerton imagine #taron egerton #taron egerton x reader #taron x you #creative writing #part 1 #primaba11erina #prompts

[ibelieveinharrystyles]

Chapter Two: London Calling?

Forever? Masterlist

25th December 2015

“Merry Christmas Anne!” Ashley called out as her and her mum entered the Twist family home, the smell of Anne’s homemade nut roast wafting towards them as they hung the coats up. 

“Ashley! Linda! Merry Christmas to you both!” Anne greeted them both with a hug, her familiar scent was sweet, with an added floral touch that Ashley didn’t recognise.

“Is that a new perfume Anne? It smells absolutely delightful.” Ashley asked as she took off her battered converse, she respected Anne too much to wear them in her house.

“Yes my love! Harry bought it for me, we did our stocking presents this morning and we’re just setting the table for dinner.” Anne told her.

“Sounds absolutely perfect!” Linda exclaimed as Anne led them into the kitchen, perfectly decorated as always, Harry stood at the island in the middle of the kitchen chopping a mountain of carrots, “You’ve got him well trained haven’t you?” 

��Linda! My favourite Hanson!” Harry cried, placing his knife on the chopping board as he ran towards her, wrapping his arms as he swayed her from side to side. 

“Look at you Harry, you’ve grown so much since I last saw you,” Linda said, taking a step back to look at Harry properly.

“Mum you literally saw him six months ago.” Ashley muttered, rolling her eyes at her persistent mother.

“Don’t listen to her Linda, she’s just jealous.” Harry told her, causing Ashley to stick her middle finger up at him, “If it’s alright with you Linda, I’m going to say hello to my second favourite Hanson.” Harry sauntered towards Ashley, “Merry Christmas!” He cried, stretching his arms out, before enveloping her in a hug, the itchy fabric of his over the top Christmas jumper.

“Merry Christmas you little shit,” Ashley whispered, so as not to let her mum or Anne hear.

“Can I get you ladies anything to drink? I’ve got wine, beer, lemonade or just water.” Anne told them as she retrieved a bottle of red wine from the fridge.

“Well as it’s Christmas I’ll have a glass of wine please.” Linda told her.

“Just water for me please, I wasn’t feeling too well last night, I’m not sure alcohol is going to help that.” Ashley said softly, “Are you doing your ginger biscuits Anne?” 

“I made some yesterday, why do you ask lovely?” 

“I just thought I could smell them, I remember the smell from when Harry and I were little.” Ashley told her.

Dinner was in full swing and Gemma and Robin had now joined the group, to some it might seem unorthodox for Ashley and Linda to spend Christmas with another family but since the Christmas of 2008 when their oven stopped working Anne insisted they came over as they had lots of food spare and since then it had become a bit of a tradition, alternating between houses each year. The room was full of laughter and the warmth from the open fire tickled their skin, the sound of the Michael Buble album filled the room. “So Harry what have you got planned for 2016?” Linda asked, piling carrots onto her plate.

“I’ve got a few things lined up, I’m looking forward to it, I never thought the idea of not having my day planned for me would be so exciting.” Harry told her, fiddling with his paper crown.

“How about you Ashley? I know you’re on a gap year, but have you decided what to do after that?” Robin asked her.

“I’m quite interested in radio, I’ve applied for an internship at Capital in London, Harry gave me their contact details, and when we went down for the boys’ show in London I had an interview, and I’ve been offered a place, starting in the new year.” Ashley told them, the only other person around the table who knew was Linda, she had meant to tell Harry, there just never seemed to be a right time.

“That’s amazing Ash!” Harry exclaimed, “So you’ll be moving to London then?” 

“I’ve got the money dad left me in his will, I think this is the sort of thing he’d want me to use it for, to get myself a small flat.” Ashley didn’t like talking about what happened to her dad, she was only ten when he passed away so she didn’t really understand at the time, he was diagnosed with cancer when she was little, and in his last few months it became increasingly worse.

“He’d be so proud of you poppet.” Anne assured her, taking hold of her hand from across the table.

The meal was finished and Anne stood in the kitchen preparing dessert whilst everyone discussed whether to play monopoly or family fortunes first. Ashley felt herself losing concentration in the conversation, she felt her palms become clammy, she began to realise it was a recurrence of what had happened the night before. She excused herself and made her way to the bathroom, making it in time to throw up in the toilet rather than all over Anne’s bathroom floor, she slumped against the wall, knowing it was likely she’d probably throw up again. The tiles on the wall were cold against her warm skin, she stood up, splashing cold water on her skin. “Ash you alright in there?” Gemma asked from the other side of the door, Ashley unlocked the door, letting Gemma in, “You look a bit peaky lovely, are you alright?”

“I think I had something dodgy to eat last night, I was sick last night as well.” Ashley explained.

“Mum told me you could smell ginger.” Gemma replied, sitting on the floor next to Ashley.

“What’s they got to do with anything?” Ashley asked.

“Ash when was your last period?” 

“I’m not exactly regular, but i’d say it was almost eight weeks ago. Wait, you don’t think?” 

“You might be pregnant.” Gemma whispered, Ashley rested her head in her hands.

“Why is this happening? Why now?” Tears rolled down her cheeks, as far as she was concerned she wasn’t ready to be a mum, she was only just an adult.

“Hey, we don’t know that you’re actually pregnant lovely,” Gemma told her softly as she held her tight, rubbing her back gently, “I might have a test somewhere, do you want to do it now?” Ashley said nothing, she just nodded, “Let's get this over and done with,” she whispered.

Ashley had never known three minutes to take so long to pass, she sat on the toilet biting at her nails, the timer on Gemma’s phone went off, indicating that the three minutes were up. “Do you want me to look at it first?” Gemma asked.

“I think I’ve got to do it, it’s pretty clear I’d be bringing up a baby by myself, for that I should be able to stand on my own two feet.” She wobbled as she stood up, taking the test in her hands. She took a deep breath and looked down at it, she knew what it meant, she turned towards Gemma, “two blue lines. It’s positive.” her voice wobbled terribly as she broke down in tears.

“It’s gonna be alright, we’re going to get through this together, we all love and care about you immensely, whatever you decide, whatever’s best for you.” Gemma assured her, cradling her in her arms, “Do you want me to get Harry or your mum?”

“You can’t tell Harry, not yet, not today, I’ll tell mum soon, just not now.” 

“Alright, we’ll go back downstairs when you’re ready.” The two girls were interrupted by a knock on the door.

“Are you okay Ash? Can I come in?” Harry asked from the other side of the door.

Ashley shoved the test in her pocket and wiped the tears from her cheeks, “Yeah come in.”

“I’ll leave you two to it,” Gemma made her way out of the bathroom, “She’s not feeling too well, look after her.” she instructed Harry.

He held out his hands to pull her up from where she was sitting on the floor “I’m going to run you a warm bath with any bubbles of your choice, then we’ll watch a film in my old bedroom, I don’t want to subject you to games night if you’re feeling ill.”

After a wonderfully long soak in the bath Ashley changed into the joggers and hoodie Harry had left out for her, she tied her damp hair up on top of her head and made her way into Harry’s room. He’d created a proper relaxed environment for her, the room was lit by nothing but fairy lights that were strung around the ceiling. “Love Actually or Home Alone?” Harry asked as she climbed into the bed.

“Love Actually, you know how much I love Colin Firth,” she chuckled, snuggling up under the duvet like a little kid.

“Don’t know why I even asked.” Harry replied, putting the DVD in the TV before joining Ashley in the bed, she snuggled into his chest as he wrapped his arm around her, stroking her arm gently. 

“I’m sorry I ruined your Christmas Harry,” Ashley whispered.

“Don’t be daft, I love spending time with you, if I’m honest with you I’ve spent so much time in other people’s company over the past five years, I’d much rather be up here with you watching cheesy Christmas movies.” 

An hour into the film Harry looked down at Ashley, she was sound asleep, she looked two peaceful, so he didn’t dare disturb her, he knew she was unwell and didn’t want to make her feel worse. He pulled his arms from where he’d been holding her, getting out of bed and pulling the duvet up so she was properly covered. He turned off the TV and all the fairy lights, “Merry Christmas my love.” Harry whispered, placing a kiss on top of her head before making his way back downstairs.

The smell of bacon stirred Ashley from her deep sleep, she peered around at the bedroom that wasn’t hers, realising she was in Harry’s bed. She slipped out of bed, making her way downstairs to the kitchen where Harry and Gemma sat eating breakfast. “Morning,” Ashley chimed as she sat beside Harry at the kitchen table.

“You feeling better?” Gemma asked, prompting Harry to get up and make up another bacon sandwich.

“Yeah, I slept like a baby.” She told her, stretching out before pouring herself a cup of tea, “You didn't say anything did you?”

“It’s not for me to say, you can tell him when you’re ready, but I know my brother, he’ll be by your side every step of the way.”

“What are you two whispering about?” Harry asked, placing the bacon sandwich in front of Ashley.

“You.” Ashley replied, sticking her tongue out at him, “When do you fly out to LA?” 

“As soon as he can I reckon.” Gemma winked at her.

“Oh yeah we wouldn’t want to keep Kendall waiting would we?” Ashley teased, Harry crossing his arms across his chest like a grumpy child, “Oh we’re only messing H, if you’re happy that’s all that matters.” Harry continued to keep up the grumpy teenager pretense, “If you don’t give me a smile I will sit on you,” Harry glanced at her suspiciously, “You leave me no choice.” She stood up from her seat and plonked herself on his lap, he uncrossed his arms and wrapped them around her tightly, her head squishing against his bare chest that poked through the gap in his white dressing gown.

“You win.” He told her, “You always will.”

#harry styles #harry styles imagine #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles imagines #series fic #harry styles blurb #texts from last night #christmas #baby #forever #one direction #one direction memes #solo harry #fanfiction #harry styles best friend fic #best friend harry #choose love #stay home stay safe #treat people with kindness #timothee aesthetic

[writingformadderton]

The Book of You and I - Part 4

Ship: Madderton

Word Count: 3458

Summary: Taron keeps his distance from his friends and Richard,feeling betrayed. Richard gives him time but it quickly shows how bad they cope with it. When they mess up a scene Richard suggests to talk about it and Taron wants Dexter with them to calm them both down. During the talk a lot of things come up that change Taron’s life all over again.

Additional Tags: emotional hurt, dizzy, Tiny dancer, argument, memories, crying, comfort

Dedicated to @taron-eggmcmuffin ❤️

Part 3  Part 5

Taron stays at home during those two weeks and barely eats anything. He knows he should, but he can’t convince himself to do so. His head hurts and he’s emotionally unstable, feeling terrible.

He looked up his and Richard’s name for the first time and found articles about them getting into the car crash. As he scrolls further down, he finds some where they suggested a relationship between them. Taron clicks on “images” and finds a ton of them. Most are of them being outside together, having dinner or giving interviews. Taron looks at the pictures closely and sees the looks they shared. “God you’re getting brainwashed by these dumbass articles.” he growls and finds a interview of them on YouTube. He considers watching it and stares at his screen for ten minutes until it turns off automatically. Taron gives himself a push, logs back in and clicks on it. “Holy shit.” he breathes out when he sees it’s from five years ago. He looks at himself, only twenty-four back then and Richard next to him, twenty-seven years old. They fool around through the interview just like they did a couple weeks ago. He watches other ones and sees the way their behavior with each other changes throughout the years. They get more comfortable around another, finish each other’s sentences and seem to know exactly what the other one is going to say. But were they really a couple? Not possible. Probably just stupid shit talk.

He throws his phone aside and stares up at the ceiling. Tomorrow would be his first day back at work. The first day he sees Dexter and Richard. Bryce told him she would be on set tomorrow as well to keep him company and Taron was glad to have her around.

Taron isn’t fully sure if it’s good to return to work tomorrow, but he knows he needs a daily routine again. He sat around the house more than he could possibly remember of his old life. T growls a bit and turns onto his side, staring out of the window. It’s like the bright sun and deep blue sky wanna mock him, not fitting his mood at all.

_

After a sleepless night, he gets up with a horrible headache and takes a quick shower. He dresses up slowly as every movement hurts his head and grabs his apartment keys. Welp, welcome back to the real world.

_

On set he is greeted by Bryce, who watches him worried. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah. Just haven’t slept properly the last four days.” he says and rubs his face tiredly. If this bloody headache would stop, he would feel better.

She hands him a pair of glasses. “Put those on.”

“Thanks.” he mumbles and follows her to the main building. Going in with Bryce by his side gives him a bit of security. Inside, he takes the glasses off again. The light isn’t as bright. When he comes inside the meeting room, he sees Dexter chatting with Jamie and Elton is also here today.

Just when they’re about to start, Richard steps inside, taking off his sunglasses. T glances at him and sees the dark circles underneath his eyes, the same he had seen beneath his own this morning. Ten minutes into the meeting, Taron feels himself getting dizzy and looks down at the floor irritated. His head hurts and he starts to feel sick while his world starts spinning.

“Taron, are you okay?” Bryce asks worried as her friend stumbles a bit and tries to hold himself up.

Richard looks over at them and tenses when he sees how pale Taron gets. “Sit him down.” he says to Bryce. Jamie helps her sit Taron down on the floor. Richard walks over to him and sits down in front of him. “Are you dizzy?” he asks and looks at him observantly.

“Mm.” T just hums and tries to blend out the black spots before his eyes.

“You should drink some water.” Rich says and takes a bottle from Dex. He opens it and holds it towards Taron. T takes it with shaking hands and takes a tiny gulp. Richard watches him closely. It’s scary to see him like that again. “When did you eat properly the last time?” he asks, knowing T stopped doing it whenever he was sad or extremely stressed. Taron just shrugs his shoulders and Rich nods slowly. The rest starts talking, giving them some space and Taron rubs his face tiredly. “Can we talk later?” Richard asks low enough for only T to hear and Taron looks at him shortly before shaking his head with tears in his eyes. “Okay. Then go home, eat something and get some sleep. You definitely pushed it too far.” he says.

“I can only tell you the same.” Taron says and raises his eyebrows at him.

Rich laughs weakly and pushes himself up. Taron gets up as well shaking a bit and sits down on the sofa. Bryce sits next to him and rubs his shoulder shortly. Dexter continues and Richard leans against the wall, feeling his own body growing tired. T was right. He needs sleep and a proper meal. But the last two weeks have made it impossible. He felt bad about lying to Taron, and he still doesn’t know the whole truth.

_

Three days later, both of them come to set feeling better physically. T shoots the Tiny Dancer scene and has some fun on set with Jamie before starting to sing. Soon enough, it’s already late and he’s freezing from standing in the dark, cold nighttime atmosphere. He sits on the top step of a little staircase and the scene starts. Taron hears Richard approaching him and takes a deep breath. Rich starts saying his lines and sits down next to him. As soon as Taron looks into those deep blue eyes, he feels the hurt welling back up inside him. He looks at him remaining silent and feels a tear running down his cheek. “I can’t do this.” he whispers and Rich bites his lower lip. “I can’t pretend to fall in love with you after what happened.”

“I know.” Richard says low-voiced and looks at him sad. “I’m sorry, T. Can we talk about it, please?”

Taron takes a shuddery breath and looks down at his knees. “When?”

“After the shoot maybe? I’ll drive you home… if you want to.” he suggests.

T nods slowly. “Okay. But I think we should take Dex with us.”

“Yea.” Richard says and gets up. “Dex?” he shouts and Dexter comes over to them. “We can’t do this right now. Not like this.” their director nods and looks at them. “We wanna talk about it.”

“Everything?” Dex asks and watches Richard curiously.

“Everything.” he says firmly and nods.

“Can you come with us? Probably won’t end well otherwise.” T admits and gets up.

“If that’s okay with you.” Dexter says and Taron nods. Seems like his friend wasn’t that mad at him.

_

Richard changed into jeans and a sweater, which is a lot more comfortable at 11:30pm than the suit he was wearing before. Taron changed into a pair of blue jeans and his favorite sweater. Seeing it makes Rich smiles a bit. It’s one of his that Taron kept when they got together. They sit down at the round table and Taron doesn’t know where to look.

“Do either of you wants to start?” Dexter asks them and both remain silent, hoping the other one would start. “Taron?”

T shifts in his seat a bit before looking at them. “You two made me feel like shit, honestly. You lied to my face and you were the ones I trusted with my stupid life that I know nothing about.” he feels the tears coming back but he doesn’t care this time. They needed see what they did to him. How he felt.

“I can understand that you’re upset about it but we had our reasons. The last time Richard tried to tell you, you told him kindly to leave and never talked to him again because you couldn’t remember him.” Dex states.

“Oh and that’s my fault now? I wasn’t the one who was driving. I was the victim in this crash.” Taron growls and shoots his friend a glare.

“Okay, next time I’ll run over a woman and probably kill her. Is that what you want?” Rich spits out and looks at him angrily. What happened that evening was neither his nor Taron’s fault. “You’d be traumatized now, just like I am. Sometimes it’s better not to remember something.” he says and sees Taron’s face going blank.

“Yeah, because you’re having such a hard time.” T laughs pejoratively and rolls his eyes.

“You don’t know shit about me. So don’t judge me on the last two months you’ve known me.” Richard says harshly and looks at him serious.

“And that’s it.” T leans forward and looks at him, feeling himself getting angry. “I don’t know shit about all of you. I don’t know shit about where I grew up, my family, my friends. The worst out of all of them is I don’t know shit about myself.” his voice cracks as he leans back in his chair again and shakes his head. “And it’s fucking gross to play with that, both of you. You don’t lie to someone who feels lost and depends on stories from others.”

“I tried to protect you, Taron. I know this wasn’t the best way.” Rich tries and gets cut off by Taron letting out a loud breath.

“If I really mean so much to you that you feel the need to protect me…then don’t fucking play with my issues.” he says through gritted teeth. “I need to be able to trust you, because trust is all that I have left.”

“I know.” The Scottish mumbles.

“No you don’t! Everyone thinks they know how it is for me, but they don’t. I can’t sleep because I’m constantly overthinking. I forget to eat. I panic late at night when my brain realizes once more there’s nothing left to remember!” he stops for a moment and wipes away the tear on his cheek. “I pull myself out of this shit day after day. You weren’t there to help!”

“I was, Taron. As you know now, I drove the bloody car. I was the one calming you down when you hit your head and I pulled you out of the car unconscious and covered in blood.” Richard says and it’s the first time he actually puts it into words in front of Taron. His throat gets tight at the thought of Taron at that evening.

“Well you were gone after the car crash, left me on my own. Where was the guy the media called my boyfriend, huh? Probably realized I’m no longer useful and just dropped me off at home.” Taron spits out and tucks his legs up on his seat.

“Who told you that shit?” he asks frowning.

“Don’t answer with a question.” he just says and looks at him, challenging him.

“I picked you up from the hospital and brought you home. On the first day, you handed me a picture of us. The second day, you said you need space. You practically erased me from your life. I would’ve never left you willingly.”

Taron remains silent for a moment and all the anger slowly fades. “And how should I know that you’re not lying to me again, right now?” he asks tiredly.

“Taron, Richard was your boyfriend.” Dexter steps in and T looks at him with raised eyebrows.

“How could you wanna prove that? With some shitty articles blogs would post when I went out with whoever for dinner tonight?” his voice shakes heavy now and he slips into hurt and sadness instead of anger now.

“I can’t do more than tell you again, I was there.” Rich says tiredly, getting frustrated.

“Prove it.” T says and shrugs his shoulders.

Richard groans and rubs his face. How the fuck was I supposed to prove the relationship was real? Suddenly, he remembers the letter he wrote for Taron on the day he left. “Hey, my name is Taron Egerton. I was involved in a bad car accident and am suffering from a retrograde amnesia, which means I forgot a lot.”

Dex watches him confused. “What the heck are you doing?”

“Shut up for a second.” T says and looks at Richard shocked.

“If I feel bad right now, it would be lovely if you could get me to a hospital. If I’m on my own and I don’t know what’s going on, I should call my mother.” Richard continues with a shaking voice.

“Here is her number. Thank you.” Taron finishes it and Richards nods. “Why the fuck do you know this?”

“Because I wrote that when I brought you home and you didn’t want me around anymore.”

Taron gets up quickly and gets a pen and a piece of paper. “Write it down.” he says and presses his lips together. Rich does as he says and writes down the first sentence. Taron recognizes his hand writing immediately and swallows hard. Did he really -?

Richard takes out his phone and removes the phone case. He takes out a picture and hands it to Taron. “That’s what you gave me.” Taron looks at the picture. That’s actually very cute. He’s smiling softly into the camera while Richard presses a kiss into his hair with his eyes closed. His eyes fill with tears and he looks back at Rich shocked. “That’s my sweater.” he says and points at T.

“It’s my favorite.” Taron admits and looks down at the dark blue soft sweater that gave him comfort so often before.

“I know.” Rich smiles softly. He searches for Taron’s number and presses call. The words “My love” appear on the screen and Taron looks down at his phone a bit startled. “The reason why my Air Pods connected so fast to your phone was because we always listened to your music with my headphones.” Richard looks up to Taron, standing there completely in shock and disbelief. “Can I show you something on your phone?”

Taron nods timidly and hands it to him. He watches Richard opening his photo gallery and scrolling down to the folder with the password. “I didn’t know the password, so I couldn’t open it.” Richard types it in and looks up to him shortly, before writing it down at the piece of paper. Taron’s eyes fill with tears and they threaten to fall down his cheeks as he sees the words “Theloveofmylife.”. He turns pale when he looks back at his phone and sees all the pictures of Rich and him kissing, cuddling, holding hands or at premieres together.

Taron falls onto his chair heavily and takes his phone back with shaking hands. He looks at the letter, Richard’s handwriting and the password. “Fuck.” is all he gets out and buries his face in his hands for a moment. When he looks up, tears are rolling down his face and he lets out a shuddery breath, tangling his hands in his hair while leaning forward. “Why didn’t you tell me?” he asks and his voice cracks in the middle of the sentence.

“When you knew about it and pushed me away, I decided to not tell you this time. I wanted to let you figure things out on your own and put the pieces together with time. It felt like forcing the fact of us as a couple onto you.” Richard explains lowly. “You can’t tell someone that they love you.”

“I-I don’t know what to say right now.” T says and his voice threatens to crack again.

“Do you understand now why we didn’t tell you about Rich and you in the first place?” Dex asks carefully and T nods slowly.

“How long have we been together?” he asks and looks at Rich, who watches him sad.

“Seven months. You wanted to make it official because you were sick of hiding it. You were talking about a future together and - two minutes later we crashed into a wall.”

“So we were happy?” Rich nods. “Did we fight?”

“Not often, harmless.” he says. “It was always about unimportant things and you came back after five minutes to cuddle.” he chuckles softly.

“Was I-Was I a good boyfriend?” he asks timidly.

“The best.” he says with a sad smile.

Taron sits up straight and nods slowly. “Tell me about the car crash. Please.”

Richard knows he’s the only one who can tell him the whole story and so he gives in. “Everything was fine until a drunk woman suddenly crossed the street. I couldn’t stop the car fast enough, so I pulled sideways. We crashed into a wall and you hit your head really bad. Had a nasty wound on your forehead. I was a bit caught up in the shock but then you asked for me and threw up. You couldn’t sit up straight because of the pain and I tried to calm you down… And then you passed out.”

“Did I say anything before I passed out?” Taron asks curiously.

“I love you forever, okay?” Richard hesitantly says and swallows hard after seeing Taron’s face going blank. “Listen, I won’t force anything onto you and if you don’t feel good around me anymore I’ll back out of the role. Blame it on stress or whatever.” Rich rubs his face tiredly and bites his lower lip nervously. “If you want me to go, I’ll do it.”

The Welsh looks up to him caught up in thoughts. “Why would you do that?”

“Because you were the most important person in my life and I wouldn’t do anything to make you feel bad on purpose.” Richard looks down at the table for a moment. “Which is why I felt like shit as well those past two weeks.”

Taron watches him startled and looks deep into Richard’s eyes. He wasn’t lying. T looks back at the picture and the letter before looking at Richard. “I’m so sorry for this mess, Rich.” he says and his voice cracks. “And the car crash wasn’t your fault. I was talking dumb shit.”

“It’s not your fault, T.” Richard assures him weakly.

Taron grabs his hand hesitantly and looks at him with tears in his eyes. “I’m so sorry, Rich.” Richard smiles at him sadly and shakes his head. It wasn’t Taron’s fault that he forgot everything. “Can I hug you?” T asks timidly as he gets up and Rich just opens his arms, doing the same. Taron wraps his arms around his waist and buries his face in his shoulder.

Richard tightens his hesitant grip around Taron and softly rubs his back as he starts crying. “Hey, it’s okay.” he whispers and Taron just shakes his head.

His whole world just got turned upside down. Again. He would have never thought that Richard and him had been a thing. Maybe that was the reason that he felt so good around him so quickly and got hurt so badly when he found out about the lie. “I’m so sorry. I completely ignored the fact that I’m not the only one who’s struggling with this.”

“You didn’t know. It’s okay, bub.” Rich says and fondles over his hair. He knows exactly where to touch him to calm and comfort him.

“Please give me a chance to make it right again. I was talking shit about you.” T begs and clings onto him.

Richard pulls back and cups Taron’s face. “Calm down. You did nothing wrong.” he looks into his sad puppy eyes and feels the urge to kiss him. But he holds himself back and wraps him into a hug again. “Don’t blame yourself now, please.”

“I’m so sick of this shit.” T sniffs into his shoulder.

“I know.” Rich mumbles. “Me too, T. Me too.”

“Please don’t lie to me again. I really can’t take this.” he chokes out and sobs into his shoulder helplessly.

“I won’t.” Rich promises and plants a soft kiss into his hair.

@fuseburner @sarahegerton96 @multicoloredchicken @primaba11erina @anxiety-at-the-classroom @maddertonmyheart @madderton-obsessed 

#taron egerton #Richard Madden #taron x richard #madderton #dexter fletcher #taron egerton fic #richard madden fic #madderton fic #taron egerton fluff #madderton fluff #richard madden fluff #emotional hurt #hurt/comfort #Memories #memory loss #the book of you and i

[screamingatanemptyroom]

I Can’t Eat Love Pt 6

Here is the next part! Please Enjoy! 

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5  linked here

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The next week was brutal. 

Each day I would get up before dawn, moving to my office to get started as soon as possible. Reading, studying, I was trying to learn a lifetime of knowledge at a breakneck pace. I still was piecing together bills and tax documents, working with Hallers to consolidate all the debt I could. Fortunately, as I was still in good standing with the Royal family, the interest and repayment plans were very generous.

I stayed locked in that tiny room, only to pause whenever Hallers brought up a meal, an increasingly worried expression on his face with each passing day.

“Miss, you must sleep!” He broke his professional silence on the fourth day, as he walked in late into the night, finding me reading a chapter on historical government forms while taking notes by candlelight. I glanced up, surprised to see him still dressed up in a proper butler uniform despite the late hour.

“Hallers, I’m sorry, did I wake you? I just have a few more pages… and then there’s still the letters from the Eastern section of Duchy….” I leaned back, rubbing my eyes with a yawn. “You might as well go to bed. I’ll make sure to blow the candle out when I finish.”

 He stood his ground, looking determined. “No, Miss.”  He picked up the candle, ignoring my squawk of protest. “I cannot let you run yourself into the ground. You cannot save this Duchy in the space of a week.”

“But… I …”

“The work will be waiting for you in the morning. But for now, please, I’m begging you… go to sleep?” He looked so miserable, I found myself nodding without realizing it.

“Fine. I’ll do this in the morning.”

I went off to bed, hiding a smile. When was the last time someone worried about whether or not I slept?

Beyond the work I had to do between lessons and the financial organization, there was still the matter of the corruption within the Duchy to deal with.

“Hallers?” Early in the week, I called him into the office.

 He stood at attention, waiting.  “Yes, Miss?”

I handed him a paper. “I need you, or someone you would trust with your life, to go into the city. In the Northwest square you will find a man who sits under a blue awning named “Rig.” Hand him this note, and tell him that you will purchase the information requested within for 50 crowns.”

Despite the oddity of the request, Hallers was a professional, his only reaction a single raised eyebrow “Is that all?”

“No.” I sighed. “He will demand at least twice the amount offered. You are to refuse this and tell him that ‘Angel’ sent you.”

“Who is this ‘Angel’, miss?”

“No one.” I laughed. “It’s a code, which only his inner circle know. If you say this, it will allow you to purchase the information I need for that price. He will tell you when you can retrieve it.”

Who would have thought that the knowledge I had earned being one of Rig’s info runners while living on the street would be helpful so quickly? I had hated the man at the time, but even I had to admit that he was the best when it came down to tracking down things others wanted to hide.

“It will be done.” With a short bow, he turned to leave. I called after him. 

“Oh, and Hallers?” When he paused, I added, “Postpone any meeting with our men involved in tax collection/counting until after you have what I requested.”

“It will be helpful to you?”

I grinned evilly. “Let’s just say I don’t believe in going into battle without a weapon.”

____________________________

Despite the drastic change in my schedule, my parents remained completely unaware. My Father, relieved that he didn’t have to pretend to care about the paperwork anymore, went riding and hunting, enjoying himself thoroughly. As long as he wasn’t spending money, I was content to let him be. As for my mother… fortunately she had been visiting her family in the South since my reawakening, and was not scheduled to return for another month. I was curious to see my mother, since my last words to her were on her deathbed. Our relationship was strained at best, however, and I need to figure out how to approach her.

The Duke and Duchess may not have been concerned with the abrupt changes I had made in my life, but it had not gone unnoticed by others. 

“What’s come over you, Miss?” my maid Angela shook her head, frustrated as she assisted me undressing one evening. “You dress so simply these days. You never go to the Royal palace gardens or visit Lady Edith anymore! Is there something wrong?”

I smiled at her grumbling. In my previous life, whenever I hadn’t been trying to perfect my etiquette lessons, I had wandered the Royal Gardens with Edith, hoping to catch a glimpse of the Prince. It seemed so silly, so empty now.

 I shook my head. “Everything is fine. Mrs. Rendler simply increased the difficulty of my etiquette lessons, and I have a lot of work to do to catch up.”

“You don’t have to work so hard, though!” She muttered, putting away my gown. “It’s not as if…” She trailed off, as if realizing what she was about to say.

It’s not as if I’ll ever get to be Queen. Of course, I know that… but how does she? I smiled, the expression cold. “Angela. Are you saying I shouldn’t do my best at preparing to be Queen?”

She panicked slightly, backing away. “No, of course not! I – I just want you to be happy.”

I kept my eyes on her own, appreciating the fear I saw there. “I appreciate the concern.”

I placed the confrontation to the back of my mind, refusing to think it through to its conclusion, but things were stirred up once more by a an unexpected encounter towards the end of the week, the day before my next trip tot the palace. She showed up unannounced, barging into my office, with Hallers trailing behind, a disapproving expression on his face at her intrusion.

“Lenora! What’s going on?!” She was a beautiful girl. Golden hair, light colored eyes, long lashes… she looked as if she had stepped out of a storybook, exactly what I thought a princess should look like.

“Edith.” The name felt wrong to say out loud after so long.

____________________________

“EDITH!” I sobbed, falling to my knees in front of her.  “You have to help me!”

She stared at me silently with glassy eyes, a polite smile hiding any deeper emotion.

Exhausted, starving, I reached out a hand towards her.

“Please, mother, father… they’re both gone… I lost my job with the seamstress… someone told them I had stolen something... I don’t know what to do!”

My hand grasped empty air instead of her skirt. She had stepped back out of my reach.

“What do you expect me to do?” Her words were lifeless, she stared at me as if I were an insect, rather than her childhood friend.

I held my grumbling stomach, hating that I looked so pathetic and weak. “Can you talk to the Queen…?”

“She refuses to hear your name.” Edith interrupted, a small gleam in her eye. “She heard the kind of dirty crimes you committed on the street, and says that you are dead to her.”

Dead? Dead.  Dead… the word repeated itself in my mind over and over, like a chant. Was that the woman who had called me her daughter, who said she loved me?

“That can’t be true! I’ve not committed any crimes. Why would she… say that? I can’t believe it!”

“Well it’s true.” Edith sighed, looking around as if searching for an excuse to leave. “Was there anything else?”

I looked back at her, lost, confused. I was so hungry. Can you help me find work? Or at least give me something to eat?”

“Sorry,” She didn’t look sorry. “My father has forbidden that I be around you anymore. He’s worried it will effect my reputation as the future Queen.” 

“What are you saying?” I stared at my only friend in the world, feeling the shattered remnants of my heart break even further.

“Goodbye, Lenora.” Refusing to look at me anymore, she walked away.

“EDITH!”

____________________________

“I haven’t seen you in days!” Edith smiled brightly, the expression turning my stomach. “I missed you!”

Her act wasn’t extremely convincing this time, to a more experienced eye. Her smile was a little too stiff, her eyes cold and calculating as they looked around the room, trying to determine what I had been up to. Even as she told me she missed me her voice seemed more irritated then sad, as if she were frustrated that I had made her do the work instead of going to her as I usually did.

 I returned her smile. “I’ve missed you too!” Standing up from my desk, I reached out, giving her a hug.

I was a much better actress.

“What are you doing? I’ve heard you’ve been locked away in this room for days!” She grabbed my hands, a true look of concern crossing her face.

“Really? Who did you hear it from?”

She balked at that question. “Oh you know… just around.”

“I see.” I looked over at Hallers with a frown, who looked furious. He nodded to me briefly and left, likely to interrogate the staff regarding who had been gossiping about my activities. I let him go, although I already had my own suspicions.

 I brought Edith away from my desk and papers, not wishing for her to see any of the Duchy’s financial numbers, and sat us down on some chairs near the fireplace. I didn’t bother ringing for tea, I knew Hallers would have already arranged it.

“What brings you here?” I asked, keeping my voice casual and polite.

Edith laughed. “What nonsense! As if I needed a reason to see my friend. I was hoping we could spend some time together, perhaps walk through the gardens?”

“I see.” I nodded, thinking it over. She wanted to see the prince, I suppose.

 “So can we go?”

“Well, not today because I have to finish some work here, or tomorrow because I have to attend my lessons with the Queen.” I noted the angry flash in her eyes at the mention of my royal etiquette lessons, but continued without comment. “Perhaps next week we can walk through the gardens.”

She looked disappointed. “Next week?”

“And perhaps I can arrange for us to have tea with the prince.” I laughed as her demeanor brightened. “Wouldn’t that be fun?!” 

“Well, if I wouldn’t be in the way…” She trailed off, watching me slyly.

“Of course not.” 

How many times had these conversations happened before? How many times did I unknowingly bring her to see my fiancé, allowing them to grow closer, sealing my own fate. Well, go with my blessing this time, Edith. I don’t want him.

Edith, unaware of my inner thoughts, seemed relieved. “Alright then, that would be fun! I just worry about you, Lenora! Don’t work too hard in this dreary little room! If you don’t go spend as much time with the Prince as possible he might lose interest!” Her hand rested on my arm. I struggled to not fling her off. “Trust me.”

I hid all my feelings deep inside, smiling brightly for her to see. “Of course I trust you.”

#writing #i can't eat love #part 6 #setting up for bigger events #edith arrives #:)