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#I have so much more to say here wow
callileonn · 5 months
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scrunkle
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~sweet indifference, gentle apathy~
#MANNNN#how FREEEING it is to be okay with things that used to crush you!!#and to realise it!!#how far we’ve come?!?!#to see like 3 triggering things in a single day & feel the little *oof* - sure - but then to just carry on w ur day???#and be fine?? and to actually feel GLADNESS?#WOW#🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼#she is HEALINGGGG and that is so GLORIOUSSS🙏🏼✨#& to come across this song ^^ (yeti - paris paloma) which hits so DEEPLY lyrically#(basically like I was saying the other night) (getting over & coming to terms w never again seeing someone who once meant so much to u)#& just be fine???? ENJOY it??? & not even shed a single tear??? ik it sounds like a lot but this is HUGEEE for me#the thought of permanent loss (of literally anyone! but ofc way more so w someone i love(d) so deeply) is CRIPPLING to me#& a song like this even just a few months ago probably would have absolutely broken me#i would have had it on repeat (which i still do anyway tbf) but it would have rendered me A CRUMPLED MESS JUST SOBBING ON THE FLOOR FOR 3HRS#& who knows.. maybe if i were coming up to a period rn it still would 🤷🏻‍♀️ but for now i’m LOVING this RESTFUL NEUTRALITY!!#it’s really really really really nice#you know some things ur just convinced you will never ever possibly get over? well here we are 🤷🏻‍♀️ MAKING BIG BIG PROGRESS 💪🏼#but also… good job i have a lil backlog of pics i forgot to post at the time huh?#cossssss my phone is still 🥴 & i haven’t been able to take many pics recently sooo this is literally from december 🤫#but lol#hope u don’t mind 😗✌🏼#(ps ALSO pls pls pls ignore my hair)(😩)(I KNOW it’s gross)(idk why i always get inspired to take pics right BEFORE i’m about to shower lol)🤦#me#mine#ur-average-girlnextdoor#your-average-girlnextdoor#still-your-average-girlnextdoor#my pics#my body
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bambeebirdie · 9 months
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This is for @bluepeachstudios ‘s Ghost in a Shell. It’s really good you should read it.
I looked at exactly one picture of Jupiter Jim and went “yeah this should be enough to draw him.” I will not be answering if it actually was
Have some bonus content under the cut!
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And sketches
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(I love any character who can say “I don’t want to go back to prison” it’s like the funniest thing to me)
#i don’t know what compelled me to hand write that text. it’s not very good#we just don’t do things the easy way here. that’s why I render with an app on my phone. i don’t believe in simplicity#i had a plan for a lot more full body shots but then I couldn’t find any good lair references so I decided to screw it#I’ve never drawn rise characters before. this is my first time drawing them and expressions wow#I’m not very good at style copying and my default is so much rounder than rise is so that was just a woof#i should say all text in these shit posts aren’t canon at all. you can figure out where they likely take place yes#but they never show up in story#just a little fyi incase anyone decides to check it out#the entire inspiration for this post was just watching 2003 and going#WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEY DID THAT??#ghost causally dropping the most wild facts about his life has like endless shit post potential#yeah I went to space. stole a ship. went to jail. aided a fugitive. held a dictator at gunpoint#and folks that’s just one arc. go watch 2003#i debated making angst as it is likely more currently topical but I’m a shit poster at heart#chapter 29. how we feeling boys? I’m actually doing rather well. i think just the fact the build up is over and I’m so tired I no longer#have emtions I’m just pumped for the next chapter whoo!#i started to lose mojo very fast while doing this but I wanted to finish today so I did. i hope it’s not too obvious#yeah anyways go read ghost in a shell#go watch 2003#go read ghost in a shell#i’m gonna go to bed now#ghost in the shell#teenage mutant ninja turtles#tmnt 2003#tmnt 2018#fan fiction recommendations#fan art of a fan fic#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#teenage mutant ninja turtles 2003
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trees-to-meet-you · 2 months
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Btw I’m actually a little behind on the pjo series so I’m only on like. Episode 5. But I’m getting to the end of it and I just wanna say I love Annabeth so much I love her and I love Leah Sava Jeffries they’re both incredible
#chatter#pjo tv show#pjo series#annabeth chase#riordanverse#percy jackon and the olympians#pjo#leah sava jeffries#shes an adorable little girl and a pretty great actress!!#it’s just like. like wow. look at her go! look at her grow!!#kinda spoilers here so look away if you don’t want them but like. it’s only episode five. it’s the very first adventure they have together#we all know how annabeth and percy and grover grow throughout the whole series and everything but this is still the very first one.#the start of all their adventures and all their changes and all their growing#and it’s like. maybe more towards the middle of the quest now? i can’t remember fully#but they’ve only known each other such a short while and already he’s inspiring her#and shes outright saying it!! outright shes saying that his belief in fairness and belief in thinking they can and should be better#has made her realize the same!! that families shouldn’t treat each other so terribly! that parents shouldn’t be neglectful!#that the prices they’re forced to pay shouldn’t exist at all!!#idk how to word it really. but i love how even if percy is a pessimist. even if he’s cynical. it’s because he knows things SHOULD be better#and how he’s able to make everyone around him see how much better it can be too#and annabeth. who was one of athenas favorites. who ran away at such a little age that the way these things are is#the only thing shes ever really known. is able to hear what he says and realize he’s right. is able to say no. no more i agree with him.#like. shes sorta the golden child in a way because she gets attention and her little hat and everything.#shes one of the favorites. and shes willing to give it all away!! shes willing to say no!!#shes willing to give up that favored status for saying that it should be the standard! the bare minimum!#anyway. im sleepy and i wanted to say annabeth chase is such an amazing character. i love her.
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aq2003 · 22 days
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my verdict on the day of the doctor novelization is that the plot is still so stupid to me but at least i can live my life knowing moffat can write ten marginally correctly but he only keeps it in a novelization where nobody is going to see it. (my personal highlights under the cut)
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him. aroace
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this is a really good take on the ten and river dynamic, they're acquaintances and ten purposefully keeps it that way. the "time can be rewritten maybe her horrible death that happened in front of me can be prevented if i stay away from her" really goes well with how he's left after the events of journey's end
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"he had to stop thinking before it tore him apart!" is THE most ten narration i've seen in my life. i need to eat rocks
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this part just makes me really really sad. the dissociation between the tone and what's actually happening (him getting tortured. for months). how he's so clearly not acknowledging what's happening to him (he won't describe the screaming as his own). how he latches onto the only other presence there and focuses on charming her and making her laugh??? this also makes the hinting at a romance between ten and elizabeth that moffat does, extremely fucking upsetting because you can see how ten is just so fucking lonely and on instinct attaching himself to anyone who has any amount of regular presence to him. even if. well. you know. the torture.
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like this. see. i need to be shot
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you will hear from my lawyers steven.
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[coughs up blood]
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the "over and over". i need to be put in a blender
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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
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c0smiccom3t · 8 months
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Silly Bandicoot Doodle Batch !!!
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(Turns out i can draw the bandicoots in the same exact artstyle as in the "It's about time" game... Well, except for Aku Aku, kind of.... idk.)
(OK thats all the fanart i can make. time to work more on my webcomic until its time to draw more fanart!!)
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freya-faust · 6 months
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freya freya freya hey hi hello!!!! i saw on your sideblog you were in mipha botw hell and as an older-game loz fan who's never played any of the newer games i would love to hear your thoughts on mipha and botw in general if you're willing to share!!!!! i hope you're doing well btw❤❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
KATE!!!!!!!!! hi hi hello ✨❤️💓💖💘❤️💓 Hi, Kate ❤️💘💖💘❤️♥️✨ I've actually gone on an unhinged rant about Mipha somewhere here before, but I didn't tag it so it's. Gone now. But yes, I will gladly do it again 💖
okay, so. First of all. I gotta be level with you, Kate: I've never played a single Zelda game in my life. I'm insane about Mipha in the way that I am standing outside BotW's house and staring into its windows. LoZ fans hate me because I break in occasionally and take pictures and say things and then leave (no fans have any idea I exist). THAT BEING SAID. I did watch a bunch of lore videos for all the Zelda games AND skim through a BotW playthrough several times, so I did research! This whole caveat is to say I know what I'm talking about, but also maybe perhaps I absolutely don't and you shouldn't listen to me maybe but also do. Anyway <3
I don't have many thoughts about BotW itself (I think about getting it every other day, but Nintendo will never put it on sale so it is but a pipe dream), except what is evident/always covered: it's so? Profoundly sad? Like, they put Link to sleep for several years in OoT, only to decide that that was too messed up and reverse it. AND THEN THEY DO IT AGAIN HERE? FOR 100 YEARS?? AND HE DOESN'T REMEMBER ANYTHING??? AND THEN WHEN HE DOES REMEMBER, EVERYTHING TELLS HIM HIS LIFE FROM BEFORE JUST KIND OF SUCKED???? MESSED UP. FREE HIM. What happens to Link is just SO MUCH, and I think BotW does a really good job of driving home that idea of how inescapable his, Zelda's, and Ganondorf's fates are. But everything I find sad about BotW as a whole gets amplified when I think about Mipha, so let's talk about her.
I'll be the first to admit that I have a type when it comes to female characters, and the reason I'm obsessed with Mipha is pretty much the same reason I'm obsessed with Iris and Susato: she's a profoundly kind and gentle woman with something deeply wrong/tragic about her way down inside. That might sound strange because, at first glance, Mipha's tragedy seems obvious. It's the same as the other Champions: she's dead. But I feel like the real tragedy lies in the preservation of her memory -- or lack thereof.
I'm not sure how familiar you are with BotW's lore and characters, but Mipha essentially occupies the same role Marin/Malon/Midna kind of did in the older games. She's the woman (with a name that starts with 'M' and has red hair/scales for some reason) who's known Link for a significant amount of time, and (for the others, may have been; for Mipha, definitely was) in love with him, though this love usually doesn't end well. To my understanding, it's never made clear in BotW how much the prev games and their lore is known/canon to the game, but there are references to them. Mipha in her diary, for example, makes reference to Ruto. I bring this up because I feel like, to an extent, Mipha knew of her place in Hyrule's history. I think she was ready to die.
There's this thing about Mipha's lines that sometimes comes across as almost... wilfully ignorant? to me? That's not to say that she's oblivious or naive about her position -- I'd argue it's the exact opposite. She sees the danger, she sees the near-futility of their cause, and she chooses to push through anyway. I'm not sure it's optimism, I don't even know if it's duty. She just seems... ready to die. To sacrifice herself for her people and, not insignificantly, Link. There's a cutscene that shows the point when she agreed to directly involve herself in the fight against Ganon, and I've always found it rather telling. For one, she only really seems to mentally commit herself to being a Champion after Zelda says Link is to be one himself, but also she says this line when she agrees to it:
"One day, Princess, I must leave him (referring to her little brother, Sidon). To face my fate with Ruta."
And it's so!!! It's so. Fatalistic, almost? To my memory, none of the other Champions really ever say anything to that final an effect. They all acknowledge the danger of the fight, of course, and the possibility of death lingers at the edges, but Mipha's is direct. She says, "I must leave him to face my fate". You could argue she just means to go to war, and that she doesn't mean she'll have to leave him until much later, but that doesn't add up with the "with Ruta" part. It very much comes across like she means she is going to die in the fight against the Calamity. Like she knows it. And she smiles afterwards. It's insane!!!! I think about that line all the time. Why I say 'wilfully ignorant' is because, despite the fact that she seems pretty sure she's going to die, she simultaneously talks about having a future with Link. She writes about telling him she loves him, and makes him engagement armour (BotW Zora thing. Functions like a ring would) and, in one of her final moments with him, talks about how "once things are over... perhaps (they) can spend some time together". It's this complicated state of double-think that appears to exist in her, and I don't know which she even truly believes!! Does she believe both somehow?? I don't know! And you know why I don't know? Because no one seems to remember she was even like that!!!!!
I am. Taking a breath. The thing about Mipha's character, story, and memory is that they exist nearly as foils to Link's own. Link was chosen by Fate to fight the Calamity, he survives, his memory exists in Hyrule as a vague, hazy compilation of stories, and he is defined by everything that comes after the Calamity. Mipha saw the end of her journey in a tomb and she lay in it of her own free will, she does not rise again, her memory is a fresh wound that her kingdom and family carry with them every day, and she is defined by her death. Arguably, all the Champions share this relationship with Link, but it's that point about living memory that I think makes her stick out.
None of the other Champions have people who knew them personally still alive by the time Link wakes (barring the Sheikah, but. They're not important right now). Mipha, however, does. Her father still reigns, her brother has grown, her teachers and friends walk the grounds of her kingdom. You would think that would make her the most defined Champion, but that's the thing. She isn't. Everyone in Zora's Domain talks about Mipha. They mention how kind she was, how gentle and dutiful and brave, but no one really talks about who she was. It isn't just the fact that they don't mention how strangely ready she was to be brave, either. In AoC, we see a lot more of her, and you can tell that she's quick to laugh, she gets flustered fairly easily, and she tends to wear her emotions on her sleeve. In BotW, no one tells you that. They only talk about her as the perfect, poised princess who sacrificed herself for the sake of her kingdom, and you kind of get the impression that the Mipha they knew and the Mipha who stands as a statue in the middle of their kingdom are one and the same. She's always going to be that flawless princess who gave her kingdom everything because that's who she was to them. Zora's Domain didn't make a martyr of her; Mipha did that to herself. She lived for other people, and then she died for them. The one person who should have known her for who she was, the one she knew from when he was a child, whom she loved to the point of dying for, doesn't even remember her. You know what makes it worse, though? It's that what causes Link to remember her is the statue. And then you realise oh. He never really knew her either, did he?
Link and Mipha's relationship is... painful. HAHAH It's the core of her character; it pushes her to become a Champion and it's what keeps her spirit hoping after she dies. He is a part of what makes her Mipha, that's just how it is. So when you think about how her memory has faded from him till all that's left is the image of the girl with the perfect smile whose last words to him included the oath, "I will always protect you" -- giving herself to other people, never asking anything for herself just as her kingdom remembers her -- it hurts! But... it was also kind of inevitable. How Mipha loves Link is tied, at least imo, again to her willful ignorance thing. Despite all of her plans, she never actually tells Link how she feels. Now, whether Link would have reciprocated or not is up for debate and irrelevant. What matters is that I think Mipha thought he wouldn't and that her love was doomed for failure (fun fact: she actually uses that phrasing in her diary. 'My heart is drawn to his. I am doomed.' Very dramatic, utterly adorable. I love her sm). In her diary, she implies she's worried about Link's closeness to Zelda when he first becomes her knight, despite the fact that Zelda clearly doesn't like him at that point. Tying that back to how I think she has some understanding of her role in the story, and you start to see why she might avoid that. It stops her from really understanding him, too. She never pushes enough to see past his armour. You know how Feenris is all about how they both saw each other at their truest despite everything that happened, and how they always knew each other at their core? MiphLink is like. The inverse of that to me. They both love each other dearly (in whatever form that is), but they've never quite understood who the other person is. It's two people who deeply want to be understood but don't know how to be. And then it just ends.
As usual, I don't know how to end this post. I think, just like, as a summary on why I'm obsessed with Mipha, it comes down to that idea that she was alive, yet everyone only seems to remember her like she was dead from the start. And it's so. Sad. And connected to that idea that you can't just be that perfect person all the time if you want to be loved, and known, and understood for who you really are. The game makes it a point of stating how independent of a person she was. Her final words to her father, as a spirit, are, "I want you to know I have always followed my heart", but when that heart is so attuned to other people, can you really say it's still yours? It's just so tied to that notion that love is inconvenience. It is being a burden, it is showing another person with the parts of you that aren't easy and trusting them to accept you anyway. You can't always be the ideal person and hope you are known regardless. It's just. The tragedy of her giving away so much of herself for all her life, and having so little to be remembered for at the end of it. It gets to me.
In essence, me when I think about Mipha:
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#everyone clap it's kate. kate is here. did you know every time kate turns up in my notifs i gain 5000+ joy. amazing.#this post is a MESS. every time i'm asked about a character i genuinely love i can't articulate anything about them.#no idea if anything here connects or means something. im just. i love her so much. im pointing at her and crying. on the floor. in shambles#mipha#this is still more coherent than the posts ive tried to write for susato. unreal. i hope you enjoyed the absolute nonsense i typed#getting tagged so i can find it in the future HAHA#anyway thank you so much for the ask kate 💖💘💕♥️💗♥️💓♥️💕💕💖 i hope it... made vague sense. and i hope you're well too!!!!!!#💕💗💕💗💗♥️♥️❤️♥️💞💕❤️💖💗💕💓💖💓💗💕💗💕💗💕💗💕💕💞❤️#to add on to the whole 'giving herself to other people thing' because i dont think i explained that well enough in the post#it's heavily implied that mipha kind of raised her brother since their mom died so young. she would have been fairly young herself then so#her whole life has basically been about looking after other people even beyond her duties as a ruler#ANOTHER thing i didn't put in which makes me insane is her line in the DLC where she asks link how much she remembers of her#and ends with 'If you can't recall those memories then I suppose it can't be helped. As for me I shall never forget.'#and it's so!!!!! grabbing her and shaking her!! why is nothing ever for you!!! you cant live like this!!!!#anyway im so normal. im so normal about her and everything haha wow. so so normal.#more superficial/obvious reasons i love mipha include: she's so pretty she has a voice like glass she moves so gracefully she is so strong#physically and mentally. she takes everything dealt to her with a smile even her death (love her 'we shall anihilate ganon together :)')#line. she's just everything#can you believe i joined a SERVER for her kate. i dont do or say anything but. i did it#i usually keep unhinged rants like this off my blog so sorry to anyone who clicked the read more and saw all that#kate's used to seeing me be batshit on my side blog 💓💖♥️💕♥️💕💖❤️ thank u kate ily ❤️💞💕💞💖💗💖💘💓💕💗❤️#asks#botw
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princekirijo · 7 months
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Finally graduated haha let's go 🥹
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opens-up-4-nobody · 22 days
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...
#its so weird. i feel like march 5th went on for more than a day somehow. i guess that's just bc we were awake for just abt all of it#my dad wanted to start doing things immediately so he was calling and scheduling all day. we went to the funeral home we went to the store#and it was weird bc as we were moving around it was like wow we r a 4 person family now. this is it. and theres so much to do after a person#dies. or at least there is when they were loved so much and jesus christ my mom was one of the best ppl a LOT of ppl knew. she did so much#for so so many ppl. and with her childhood she had every reason to b a fuck up but no she was kind and selfless and amazing. her mother is#trying to bask in the attention of her death when its like: truely go fuck urself. her being such a good person has nothing to do with u. u#treated her appallingly. fuck off. and fucking everyone knows it. god. she is a product of her grandparents kindness. and it sounds like her#dad was amazing like her. but he tragically died in a car wreck when she was 3. she was in the car. no one in my mums family believes in a#god now. too many bad things happened to the shining gems in a collection of wild alcoholics. but its not all bad. my family's staying close#my dad is taking it hard bc this means hes alone now and my mum took care of so many things bc she was so smart and he feels so dumb. he#feels he didnt deserve her. hes working on giving more hugs now. and hes using us to anxiously talk things out the way he did with mom#which is good. i cant imagine if this happened when we werent 3 adults and he was windowed with 3 kids to raise himself. and its funny. were#saying things we never would have told her. we looked thru pictures of her and she was so so beautiful. a total smoke show. my parents were#a cute couple who produced cute kids. and my mom had trouble communicating and being affectionate tho we knew she loved us there was#distance. theres a pic of my dad pulling her close and shes being tippef towarf her while standing away and thats indicitive of their#relationship. they were 2 partners who lived together independently and that worked but its sad bc my mum couldnt b vulnerable in her#expression. ppl r being so kind tho. ill be in ohio now for like 2.5 more weeks as the funeral stuff shakes out. we have to have 2 bc she#grew up away from her and so many ppl loved her in both locations. she was a popular lady. its so weird to b here on pause. but i feel clear#in my head. i think this will change a lot of my outlook on life. its nice to focus on the person she was and not the horrible 12hrs where i#saw her half dead. i cant imagine how awful it was for my sisters and dad to see her downslide into death. she didnt expect this to b The#Fever that killed her but it did and now she'll never finish a million things. and the house is full of pill bottles and all her junk and#unopened amazon packages and a truck with the fuel left on empty. bc she was an absent minded goofball. ay. well miss her so much#unrelated
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nateriverswife · 1 month
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I have never seen any author complain about this but i would totally understand if someone would be annoyed that their readers are seeing romance when they intentionally didn't include that.
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vse-kar-vem · 2 months
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why are we having queerbaiting discourse as a fandom in the year of our lord 2024 😭😭 we're just as bad as twitter oh my god
#real people cant queerbait. jance arent queerbaiting bokris arent queerbaiting either .#we have no right to know their sexualities nor do they have any obligation to tell us before kissing a man. they could be fully straight#they could be playing gay chicken 24/7 (they are) and that still isnt queerbaiting !#what they choose to put in that photoshoot 'authentic' or not is their choice#its so stupid cuz like i thjnk its such a nothingburger of discourse 😭 neither of the ships at play here are in direct conflict with#each other#literally for everyone on both sides : dont like just block#i dont think anyone in this fandom has malintent or is tryinf to put any other members down on purpose#+ we all have our own preferences when it comes to shipping#also i think stuff thats getting said is getting so misinterpreted and magnified beyond original intent that its making everything such a#largwr deal than it is#anyways! my own personal gripe: related to my orher post#why are we babying grown men lord 😭 i would also LOVE a jannacejure photoshoot but im sure its not hurtful for tjem if they dont do it 😭#like theyre grown men not elementary schoolers who need to be told theyre special#sorry that was a little more confrontational! wow we have really descended into disxourse today havent we#what im trying to say is this: i have beloved mutuals on both 'sides' and hold no hard feelings at all we're all entitled to our opinions#and i think it's really stupid to be drawing lines in the sand like this around issues that dontt even matter#ok! im done#vee rambles#ok yeah ive gone back and read all the discourse and my conclusion remains the same. i thjnk some people are reading a leetol too much into#things#but i think both sides have valid points#whatever we shall take it as it comes
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beautifel · 5 months
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seems like my heart does nothing but break lately
#oh my god dont read the tags. it breaks for everyone :( but on a more personal level#for my gf whos sinking deeper into something n i cant even help bc im a wreck myself but i am so so scared to lose her#still havent even been able to book a psych appointment n i rlly dont know where to go with all these ..em*tions#Guys i rlly dont understand one thing. how come one random freak whos in ur life at some point can derail a whole person like eons later#jeopardise their whole future just by crossing some lines for funz i really dont understand this#not fair not fair at all this is evil#and becasue u got unlucky someone wanted to be disgusting u have to carry the consequences#i rly still cant even say it i still cant even write it#i dont even know how . irl the only perosn i told in some capacity#is dealing with her own trauma and i hate that jsut being understanding is not enoughlike#Wow Lmao Its just Funny How it Shapes You. & U Can Never bury it forever becuz it will always catch up to you😂😂😂😂😂😂#AND THE PAST CAN NEVER BE ERASED 😃😃😁😁😂😂😂🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔪🔪#at least my gf has been taking steps to deal with it for.3 yrs and i just never even#LOL i feel like such a coward but the sh*me and the g**lt associated with the Thing..r so overwhelming i cant even admit it#what would i even do at the psych appointment like straight up what am i gonna say Lol#hai iam here to process something i dont actually remember probably becasue i was a child but imnot sure. n id rather#kms than tell u how i know 😂. So thats also why my heart breaks. for that little girl who was a ball of shame i guess and no matter#how much i cognitively.like rationally know its not my fault the ball of shame n guilt is still there#n it swallows me every time i vaguely start 2 think about acknowledging the Th*ng#or whatever. And thats just my end of the deal but my gf has it worse genuinely bc she remembers everything n still has to see the freak#n it went on for yrs n her family doesnt know n heres the worst thing hes a beloved family member a sweet boy with struggles of his own#well i hope he walks into traffic for doing what he did to her
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empoleon · 10 months
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stranger things have happened
• rated m, one shot, 3088 words
• also available to read here
Wolfwood is humming something against the fabric of Vash’s shirt—his shirt, because Vash has taken to wearing his articles of clothing as of late—when Vash speaks up.
“They like that,” he says softly, tilting his head back with a smile.
Wolfwood pauses, lips ghosting a kiss near the spot where he was singing. “’S just something I heard a long time ago.”
From the orphanage, but it goes unspoken. Vash is fairly certain it’s in Wolfwood’s mother tongue as well, but he doesn’t comment on it—bringing that up now would probably embarrass him enough to stop and Vash certainly doesn’t want that.
They're in bed together at some rundown inn—traveling too much with Vash in his current state puts a bit of a strain on both of them, so it’s easier if they make frequent stops. They just need to be careful. They have to be careful.
Wolfwood would never forgive himself if something happened to—
It’s almost unnerving to feel the faintest movement touch the skin of his cheek, stopping his train of thought immediately. It’s such a brief feeling and he almost questions if it actually happened, but Vash beats him to it.
“Nick, did you—?”
“Yeah,” Wolfwood glances up at him, unable to hide the awe in his voice. “He moved.”
 .
 150 years. A century and a half, and Vash did not know about this. 
To be fair, there is a lot about himself that he isn’t aware of, either purposely brushing it off as a one-off occurrence or simply refusing to acknowledge it. 
Plant anatomy wasn’t something he was keen to learn about. He understood his basic, primal needs and that was that. 
Humans, on the other hand…
Cross-species breeding simply never came to mind. And even if it did, Vash was far too busy enjoying the feeling of Wolfwood on top of him, holding him close, whispering things he longed to hear—knowing that each spoken word was true—he loves you, all of you, every single piece of your being, every scar and blemish branded from God himself.
(He loves you.)
 .
 “Oi, blondie—you want to tell me why you dragged me out here again?”
The dim lighting in the old saloon feels suitable at this moment, one of the lights flickering idly. It’s noisy, overcrowded and Vash almost reconsiders his priorities. 
“How ’bout a drink first?”
It’s not something Wolfwood refuses, but he eyes the glass of water that is placed on their shared table. It’s murky in color, with a few specks of dirt swirling around, but it’s better than what they have seen in the previous towns. 
Wolfwood grabs his own glass, filled with a smooth amber tinge. “So,” he takes a swig and licks his lips. “What’s wrong?”
Vash wants to laugh. Leave it to Wolfwood to get straight to the point. 
“Nothing! Well, mostly nothing,“ Vash gives him a smile that doesn’t quite reach his eyes. “You know how it is.”
Except Wolfwood doesn’t know, with the way Vash keeps skirting around the topic at hand. 
The alcohol in his system is beginning to warm him up, and if he didn’t know any better, he’d think Vash is about to say something unimaginable. It worries him.
There’s a ruckus outside the saloon that quickly enters through the double swing doors, men shouting unintelligible things—words like ‘bounty’ and ‘where is he?’ are all that Wolfwood needs to hear before he downs the rest of his drink and roughly grabs Vash by the arm. 
“Hey, wait—I didn’t get to finish my drink!” Vash whines dramatically as he stumbles to his feet. One of the men arguing with another patron glances over towards them and Wolfwood curses.
“Damn it! Will you shut it?” He swivels around and pulls Vash into a corner of the saloon, trying to obscure the view of the humanoid typhoon from any onlookers. Miraculously, it works.
The commotion dies down after the barkeep threatens to drain the tap and close up for the evening. Those who initially caused the uproar either slip back out into the night or decide it’s time for a drink.
Vash really wishes he could have one right now, too. The water on the table may not taste great, but his throat has never felt so dry.
His arms find their way around Wolfwood’s waist, and he holds him there for a moment, in the corner of that saloon. The lights flicker again.
“I need to talk to you.”
 .
 “Guess he likes my voice,” Wolfwood smooths a hand against the swell of Vash’s belly. 
“He?” Vash can’t hide the curiosity in his voice at the word, raising an eyebrow. “What makes you so sure?” 
“Spikey, there is absolutely no way in hell you’re giving me a daughter,” Wolfwood states it so seriously that Vash starts to laugh. “I mean it. My heart won’t be able to take it.” 
 .
 When he finally manages to tell Wolfwood what has been ailing him, he isn’t entirely sure what to expect, reaction wise.
Yelling or swearing? An average response, perhaps the best possible outcome, especially when it comes to the man Vash has known for so many years now. Calling him names falls under this category as well.
What he didn’t expect was the silence, or Wolfwood’s cigarette falling out of his mouth a second later. 
“You’re—”
Vash nods, unable to say anything else. It’s hard to meet those dark eyes that are glued to his body.
“And it’s…” Wolfwood trails off, motioning to himself.
Another nod. 
There’s a long pause before everything goes back to normal—whatever that actually is, Vash isn’t certain, but it feels like he can breathe again once Wolfwood regains his senses and finally says more than a few words.
“I thought you said we didn’t need to use condoms!” Wolfwood exclaims. “I asked you three times!”
Three separate times, in fact. Vash groans and runs a hand through his hair. “I mean, we don’t need to—we’ve never had—I didn’t think this was possible,” he settles on saying, because it’s true. 
This was purely impossible, and yet somehow, after 150 years, his body finally decided it was time. 
“With how often we fuck, I’m surprised this didn’t happen sooner,” Wolfwood mutters. 
He’s not wrong, as embarrassing as it is to think about it.
“So…” Vash wrings his hands together, eyes flickering between Wolfwood and the cigarette that has long since been forgotten on the ground. He moves his boot to step on it, putting it out. 
“So,” Wolfwood parrots, stuffing his hands into his pockets. “Are you okay? With all of this, I mean.”
“Me?” Vash blinks, confused. “I guess so, I was mostly worried about—”
He doesn’t get to finish his sentence before Wolfwood reaches over and pulls Vash into an embrace.
“Save it, blondie,” he says quietly. “You and I both know I’m fine with kids.” Wolfwood is also not wrong about that. 
“That’s not what I asked you.”
Are you okay with this? Is this what you want?
“I—yeah,” Vash lets out a shaky breath. “I really am.” He wraps his arms around Wolfwood’s neck and buries his face into his shoulder. “Thank you, Nick.”
For everything.
 .
 A daughter… she would look just like you, Nick, Vash thinks to himself while Wolfwood continues to argue with him—with their child. And she would act like you, too.
“I don’t need two needle-noggins in my life,” he says sternly, but there’s a hint of amusement in his voice. “So please inherit some damn common sense—”
“I have plenty of common sense,” Vash interrupts him. “For example—”
Wolfwood scoots his hand up underneath Vash’s t-shirt and squeezes the warm skin of Vash’s hip with a rough hand, eliciting a yelp out of him.
“Don’t say another word,” he grumbles, “unless you want me to knock more of that so-called sense into you.”
Vash’s smile is everything devious in nature. “I would love to see you try.”
 .
 The first time Wolfwood sees just how different Vash is as far as humans go, he’s equal parts aroused and surprised.
“You really weren’t kidding,” he says while trailing a finger across the inner part of Vash’s upper thigh, tracing a scar that mars the skin there. It stops just short of what he could only describe as thin, petal-like folds, tightly wound and—quivering? “This is pretty freaky, spikey.”
“Don’t tease me,” Vash all but huffs as his body is out on display for him. One too many drinks later and they find themselves in yet another unfamiliar, yet all too recognizable inn bedroom. 
It was easy for both of them to make it to this point—they always, always do, but this time it is different. It’s edging closer to something that neither one of them can turn away from.
Wolfwood grins at him. “Oh, I’m just getting started.”
 “Can you—y-yes, right there,” Vash’s calves tighten around Wolfwood’s shoulders instinctively, hands gripping the bed sheets beneath him. 
“Easy, Vash,” Wolfwood is a little breathless when he pulls back, a hand trailing along the metal of his prosthetic. “Digging into my neck a bit there.”
Vash almost immediately tries to sit up, looking extremely concerned. “Shit, I’m so sorry—”
Wolfwood carefully presses a hand to Vash’s lower abdomen, stopping him. “It’s fine, sweetheart,” he licks his lips. “Lie back down.”
His legs loosen a bit, this time more mindful of Wolfwood’s fleshy shoulders. Vash had insisted on leaving his prosthetics on, enjoying being able to anchor himself against his lover. 
Wolfwood continues where he left off, nose brushing the inner, wetter petals that are waiting for him, taking in Vash’s scent with a soft inhale. 
He flicks his tongue across them, watching as they unfurl and invite him into something far greater. 
“Nick—” Vash arches his back with a groan. “More, I—”
“More what?” Wolfwood murmurs it against the opening of his slit, lips finding their way around the swell of a small bud that is nestled between it. “Full sentences.”
“More, please,” Vash’s voice trembles, “Don’t fucking stop.”
“Language, sweetheart,” Wolfwood presses a kiss to the bud, nips at it gently with his teeth and proceeds to curl his tongue around it. 
He sucks long and slow, far too slow for Vash’s liking, evident in the way he hears another groan come from him. 
Vash’s hand reaches for Wolfwood’s hair, tugging as he rocks his hips closer.
“Oh, Nick,” he gasps this time and Wolfwood is certain that he’s close, noticing how the room begins to glow a touch brighter. 
Seeing those intricate patterns spark to life across various parts of Vash’s body ignites something truly deep within Wolfwood, far deeper than any spoken word of some higher being he could imagine.
They dance across scarred legs, skipping over pieces of well worn beryl-infused metal, trailing up Vash’s torso, his neck—
Vash shudders when he comes, fingers flexing into Wolfwood’s hair, purposefully forcing the man to stay put between his legs.
Not that Wolfwood would have ever minded.
He laps up everything that Vash gives to him and tries to coax out even more with his mouth, relishing the sweet taste that hits his tongue. 
“Still with me, darlin’?” Wolfwood breaks away from him with a quiet gasp. He brings a hand up to his lips and wipes at it, grinning. 
“Uh-huh,” is the only coherent response he gets, Vash’s body going limp with bliss. “’S good, Nick, you’re so good.”
“Preaching to the choir, I see,” Wolfwood runs a hand up Vash’s thigh, tracing along the intricate plant markings and noting how they shimmer brighter with each touch. “Let’s see what else that pretty mouth of yours can do.”
 .
 “How did the appointment go?” Wolfwood eventually asks, moving up to settle beside Vash. “Did Brad ask about—”
“The feathers,” Vash nods and sighs quite dramatically. “It was going so well, too, but then I sneezed and everything just,” he lifted up both his hands and spread his fingers, metal and flesh flexing wide, “Exploded?”
“Exploded?” Wolfwood can’t help but laugh. “Our child is already a menace, I can't believe it.”
One morning Vash had awoken to small, downy feathers attempting to sprout from his shoulders and forearm—the last time that happened, any time that happened, actually, was when they—
Well. Vash definitely didn’t relay that information to Brad, but he didn’t try to hide any of his bodily changes when he went for his most recent checkup. 
Luida suspected it had something to do with the pregnancy—that energy, a life, now being constantly generated from within him. He was bound to have some… interesting side effects.
“I couldn’t believe it,” Vash says after a moment. “You should’ve seen the look on Brad's face when it happened though, or the room,” he pauses and glances at Wolfwood with a smile. “Completely covered in feathers.”
Wolfwood snakes an arm across Vash’s chest, moving to rest his head on his shoulder. “Bet he loved that,” he closes his eyes. “Glad everything went smoothly, blondie. I should be able to come next time.”
Vash turns his head and presses a kiss to Wolfwood’s hair. “Luida would like that. She’s been dying to see you again, you know.”
“More like dying to have someone help out around the ship,” Wolfwood sighs, but there’s no malice in his tone. “Say, next time we visit…” he lowers his hand down Vash’s chest, stopping pointedly at his stomach. “They’ll be able to tell us what the little sprout is, yeah?”
Vash’s small intake of breath doesn’t go by unnoticed and it causes Wolfwood to sit up, getting a better look at him. “What’s wrong?”
“Well—” Vash starts to say, but closes his mouth promptly. 
“Wait,” Wolfwood reaches over to the side of the bed and suddenly the room is illuminated by the warm glow from the lamp. “Vash, don’t tell me you—” he glances back over at him and studies his face for a moment in silence. Vash desperately wishes Wolfwood wasn’t so damn good at reading him for once. 
“You already know, don’t you?” 
Vash groans and brings a hand up to his face. “It was an accident, Luida brought it up before I could stop her. I’m so sorry, Nick.” 
Wolfwood exhales and slumps back against the pillows. “Unbelievable.”
Vash attempts to roll over to face him, being on his back for so long starting to become a bit uncomfortable. “Nick?”
Silence. 
“Nicholas,” Vash pouts—he definitely has no right to do so, but he can’t help it. “I can just tell you, would that make it better?”
“No,” Wolfwood sighs. “I still want it to be a surprise.”
“I can act surprised when she tells us!” Vash says with enthusiasm. Wolfwood gives him a withering look. “No? Okay, okay,” he frowns, “it was worth a shot, though.”
“You are a complete needle-noggin idiot, you know that?” Wolfwood reaches over to flick Vash’s head. “And… it’s all right, don’t worry about it.”
“Are you sure?” 
“Yes,” Wolfwood stresses the fact with a poke to Vash’s cheek. “I can wait a few more weeks. You better not bring it up on accident, though, or else—”
“I won’t! I promise, scout’s honor!”
 .
 Wolfwood is a lazy kisser—Vash used to tease him for it, but it wasn’t as though he was much better—or had any practice.
And they really did have the time now for these sorts of things.
He sighs as Wolfwood peppers a trail of kisses up his chest, taking his time with each scar and meld of flesh and metal his lips come past. 
“Nicholas,” Vash’s voice is light, full of warmth. “I thought you said— oh!”
Wolfwood captured his mouth with ease, stopping whatever teasing comment that was about to be said. 
His lips are chapped, but still somehow soft, warm—Vash has half a mind to point that out, but Wolfwood won’t allow it with the way his mouth is working. 
Vash gives in and sighs into the kiss, tugs him closer, prosthetic fingers raking through Wolfwood’s hair. It’s enough of an incentive to keep going, by any means. 
Even if there is shouting outside the inn bedroom’s window, or the ringing of a few gunshots sounding off in the lingering desert air. 
Vash breaks the kiss to turn his head, ignoring how Wolfwood sets his aim for his throat.
“Should we go—mmh,” Vash tries to suppress a moan, unsuccessfully, “check that out?” 
Wolfwood pauses, lips lingering near Vash’s collarbone. “During the middle of this?” 
He has a point. 
And to further express said point, Wolfwood slowly rocks his hips along Vash’s thighs.
“You’re right,” and Vash can’t believe he’s saying it with a smile on his face, one that Wolfwood can’t see from this angle, but knows that the man can feel. 
The whole room is lighting up, after all.
“It can wait,” Vash decides, and Wolfwood takes him.
 .
 One minute of silence passes between them, and then two. 
“Okay, I can’t do this,” Wolfwood rolls over to face Vash. “’M not going to be able to sleep unless I know.”
Vash is unable to restrain himself from laughing. “Really? Surely there’s something in your good book about rewarding patience.”
“Always be humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love,” Wolfwood recalls the passage in a low voice. “I think I’ve been pretty gentle lately, all things considered.”
“Oh, absolutely,” Vash agrees, amused. “Not so humble, though. Might need some brushing up on that.”
Wolfwood slides a bit closer to Vash. “Good thing we’ll have some down time for the next couple of months then—I could use some practice.”
“I happen to know an excellent teacher,” Vash says. He feels Wolfwood snake an arm across underneath the blankets, reaching for his shoulder to pull Vash in an embrace. 
“If you say Brad, I swear to fucking God—”
Vash’s huff of laughter is the only response Wolfwood gets before a pale hand beckons him closer. 
Even in the now-quiet of the room, Vash’s whisper to his ear is perhaps the softest thing Wolfwood has heard in a very long time. 
He can’t help his too sudden reply, his own voice on the verge of cracking. “Really?”
Vash nods. “Yes, really.”
And if Wolfwood hid his face in the crook of Vash’s neck, eyes filled with a dampness that threatened to spill over and unable to say anything else except a murmured ‘thank you’—
It was enough. 
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frecklydork · 4 months
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I love to imagine all of my Ryan F/Os sitting in a little room in my head and chilling out and hanging out with each other. Even the ones I haven't "met" yet (movies I haven't seen but will eventually)
You know that meme from the office "I love inside jokes. Would love to be a part of one someday"? Well it's Holland March and Jacob Palmer being impatient for me to finally enter their universe. "We love our girlfriend Keri. Would love to actually meet her someday"
#love notes#Holland tag TBA#💕♬♪ ♡ It feels different when you're with me - ̗̀☆🥂🖤✨☆ ̖́-#Ken saying to Colt 'COLT MY BRO you're SO SPECIAL'#'Keri must LOVE you since you're here in this room with us! you're her BF and she hasn't even been to ur dimension yet!!!!'#and Colt's like HAHA SO COOL BRO 👍 and Ken's like TOTALLY SO COOL 👍👍#meanwhile Holland and Jacob are like WHERE IS MY GIRLFRIEND????#I MISS MY WIFE I'VE NEVER MET????? WE KEEP HEARING ABOUT THIS KERI GIRL#i like to think my F/Os feel connected to me/in love with me even before we meet. when they're in the room together#so they're like. i love her so much. but also i've never seen her face to face#i think holland is more patient tho he's just vibing. he's like wow free drinks and snacks in this room hell yeah bitch#or maybe he wouldnt say hell yeah bitch. sorry ive watched a lot of breaking bad im thinking of jesse#anyway jacob's checking his watch every 5 mins saying WHERE'S KERI? WHERE'S MY GIRL? MY STAR GIRL?#and ken is like :) she's been in my dimension 70 times bc im the most specialist boi. im her favorite everyone remember that#Driver and Luke and Six are all comparing their barcode tattoos#they're like wow we all have the same wrist tattoo. crazy random happenstance.#we also have similar voices and similar noses and eyes and height and build!#hahaha but let's not think about that too hard! :)#i have this scenario in my head where ken looks at colt#and he's like! oh god! keri's gonna forget all about me! look at THIS handsome guy! i cant compete!!!!#he looks like ryan gosling!#and then six turns to him and says quietly... 'ken we ALL look like ryan gosling'
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sucrose-soymilk · 6 months
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hadn’t really regressed in a While and i didn’t realize how much i missed/dareisay needed it until i had the free time and ability to do so over the last few days and i have to say. i’m feeling a bit better
#imagine that! the coping mechanism… helps!!! wow#Seven’s Small Thoughts#not tagging this as anything else bc this blog is really just a not-so-secret public diary#and im not really trying to gain any sort of following or participate in the community very much#i just wanna talk to the void abt regression every once in a blue moon y’know#i also feel like i don’t really belong in the community much/am not a Good Example of sfw agere since i’m very n/ s/ f/ w everywhere else#which is a double standard that i don’t hold others to but i feel like others will hold it against me??? and i’m just shy anyways#and not looking to interact. just wanna keep all this stuff tucked away in a side-blog#i also feel like a lot of the community likes to blog while actively regressed and i don’t wanna step in there as someone who isn’t#nothing wrong with it! at all! i just don’t have the capacity to since i go nonverbal when i regress. no thoughts head blissfully empty#anyways this wasn’t supposed to be a vent post let’s change the topic!#anywhooo what else did i come on here to say. oh yeah#i lowkey forgot how much regressing has helped me in the past until i was able to really indulge myself in it again recently#it’s so nice to just be small and hand someone else the reins and forget abt everything other than doing something you enjoy#maybe one day i’ll be at a point in my life where i can fully regress more freely and more often but for now i’ll take what i can get#i’m also excited because i’ve been thinking abt ordering a paci from this one specific seller#and yesterday saw that they’re dropping a new batch of fall/halloween themed ones today!!!#so now i’ve gotta make myself stay awake until 6pm so i can jump on it when they’re available#which is a small struggle considering my nocturnal sleep schedule but i will do it nonetheless#that crescent moon patterned one Will Be Mine#trying to decide between buttercup yellow and schoolbus yellow for the clip#i think i’m more drawn to the vibrancy of the schoolbus yellow honestly#eeeeeee i’m excited i’ve been wanting to treat myself to ordering from this shop for a g e s and im finally gonna do it
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sunsfancyscooter · 7 months
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okay but i genuinely feel as if segasaki is yearning for the bond he and yoh shared in he past and by past, i don't necessarily mean long ago but a bit back before the roots of miscommunication and overthinking bore fruit in their relationship. while i do see how he knows that yoh loves him just as it was (verbally) reciprocated by yoh at the end of episode 04, i am anything but convinced that segasaki is craving anything less than some terrible curry from the past. he misses the times when the veil of aloofness (as he said is characteristic trait of yoh as a person, which again-he adores) wasn't as thick as it is, as if yoh's out there to reach except a little too far and segasaki can only really close the gap with complete emotional comfort when yoh is drunk and idk okay bye.
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