#I feel a mental breakdown coming on | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

makotonaegiunderstander · 25 days

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something I’ve been thinking abt is how many people think Makoto is immune to despair. I don’t think he is. I think becoming the ultimate Hope was BECAUSE he felt despair. He wouldn’t have fully reached that point without Junko. Makoto becoming such a beacon was his last attempt to avoid completely falling and it wasn’t because he didn’t feel despair, it was because he was too damn stubborn to allow everything to go to waste and he refused to sacrifice his beliefs for someone else’s. His inner monologue tells me he DID experience the same new low the other suvivors did in the final trial, but at the point where he had the choice to give up and die, he looked at the others and he looked at Junko and he couldn’t allow it to happen, not out of self preservation, but because the idea that Junko would have control over their lives made him FURIOUS. and that utter refusal to die kicked in, wether luck or otherwise, and he made the concious effort for one last push while something in him was breaking. He had to be broken in order for the Ultimate Hope to come through so aggressively, bc it could only exist in the face of the Ultimate Despair. He snapped the same way she did, but in the other direction. In what could have been his final moments he chose to embody everything Junko wasn’t, and every single optimistic and luck fueled ideal in him suddenly charged forward and pushed him. It was a combination of the final straw and a choice. Makoto isn’t immune to feeling despair, he’s just too stubborn to fall into it of his own volition. I think that’s why I like that scene in DR3 so much. People were SO SHOCKED Makoto actually fell for the tape, that he actually became despair for a moment. I saw people getting mad or disappointed, saying it was pathetic and Makoto seemed to fall from some sort of pedestal for them. Honestly part of me wonders if that sort of mentality, which clearly people had in universe, affected Makoto a bit. Like he started to see himself as less of a person, subconsciously. Prompting him to take more risks, less self preservation, act way more bold. It seems he has to be reminded a lot not to put himself in danger by his friends, to not do something too reckless. All over the place I would see in regards to that scene either this frivolous ‘oh this was just angst drama with no meaning behind it’ or ‘he can do better than that. he’s so weak’ or ‘come on, there’s no way he’d fall into despair, he’s the Ultimate Hope!’ This kind of mentality, which was kind of ironic considering Ryota was there the entire time saying the same thing and treating Makoto the same way. Like Makoto was superhuman. Like Makoto didn’t feel despair the same way ‘normal people’ did. In a way that was also how Munakata saw Makoto. Makoto stopped being a PERSON to the world when he became Ultimate Hope, he became a concept, a belief system, much the same way Junko ascended beyond herself. But the difference is that treating Makoto that way is the opposite of the reason Makoto became such a representative for hope. He wasn’t doing something no one else could. He was doing something everyone had the chance to, he just… was a little more optimistic, a little more stubborn, a little more ‘gung-ho’ about things. He just took the lead where no one else did, where no one else knew they even COULD in the face of Junko’s unstoppable force. She had overcome the biggest threats and obstacles in the world, what could one person do? And the answer Makoto found was, anything. Everything. It doesn’t all rest on Makoto, he’s just the one that was inspired to try to do what seemed like the impossible. But as evidenced by the change in his friends after that trial, it’s clearly not something only Makoto is capable of. The others pulled out of despair thanks to Makoto, but it was their choice to do so.

“But… this world is so huge, and we’re so small. What can we do…? No, we can probably do anything. Yeah! We can do anything!”

#makoto naegi #Danganronpa character analysis #Danganronpa #danganronpa thh #danganronpa future arc #I fucking love Makoto Naegi man.#I think there’s a fine line of nuance to Makoto that’s easy to miss bc he doesn’t really make it known #he’s not a pushover and he’s not overpowered. he’s a people pleaser but he will say what needs to be said #he’s an immovable object and the exact opposite of Junko but he’s also just a normal guy who’s optimistic and (un)lucky #he isn’t invincible but he has immense power to his words the same way Junko did #if anything his superpower is being kind above all else. he’s compassionate to some of the worst people in the world.#he was even conpassionatr to an extent to Junko. he didnt want her to kill herself despite everything she’s done #and he still acknowledges that for years she was a classmate and friend.#I do think the more he learned abt what she did the more he’s come to actually hate her though #post the first game he always refers to her without a suffix to her name which is one of the most subtle rude things you can do #it means you have zero respect for the person you’re referring to #and he speaks about her with some venom he doesn’t use for anyone else in the future arc #he’s not incapable of feeling negative emotions #I really liked the future arc scene bc it showed that Makoto DID experience enough despair to have overcome him if he didn’t refuse #and that it still affects him deeply. people treat him like he’s either this perfect ideal Chad or this baby chick who’s so delicate #and no one really focuses on how makoto shoulders so much and yet is still vulnerable.#honestly that guy was DUE for a mental breakdown even without the tape. it would have happened eventually #I actually wrote one based on him finally hitting a breaking point after giving so much of himself away and keeping nothing for himself #that his issues that he shoves down constantly finally can’t be held down anymore. Hajime helps him bc he knows how that feels #it was a LONG time ago that I wrote that but honestly if I can remember where i was going w it I might finish it #it was initially an rp but I could make it a fic #anyway. the point is Makoto is SO much more complex than people give him credit for #the most fundamental thing about him is that he’s normal and that’s ok! that’s what helps him rise!

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cryptid-moose · 4 months

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Some Shawn doodles feat. Gus

#forest fumbles #forest draws #Shawn Spencer #burton guster #psych #would Shawn wear a sleeveless turtleneck? absolutely not #did I draw him in one anyways?#of course i did 💥💯✨💅🦅💪🍍✨💥#I’m not gonna be active for a bit so I decided to post some art before I dip lol #my mental health has kinda been spiraling to a level that im not really used to #so im gonna be taking a break from social media #AND THIS TIME ITLL ACTUALLY BE A BREAK ISFVBHUEVHFU i wont just dip for 30 hours #and come back with absolutely no progress purely because i was too bored lmao #cause if this does lead to a mental breakdown like i feel its going to i dont want that on the internet for all to see FHUDVHBVEU #cause that would be like- majorly embarrassing 🤢 huvefbhuvefbhu #ive already gone a teensy bit bananas on here i dont need ppl seeing the whole basket lmao #if u reblog pls dont make tags referring to the tags i made about my mental health #like i appreciate the sentiment 100% but idk how i feel about other ppls followings knowing im having a moderate crisis rn lmao #im not even comfortable with the entirety of my following knowing thats why i kept this all under the see all thingy #if that even makes sense #okay i need to stop adding more train of thought tags its not healthy suhfvhuefvuhe #anyways bye bestiessss 🤙

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grooviestsadpapaya · 4 months

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Literally I cannot possibly have anyone I know in real life find out about my comic or I will have two worlds collide and that would be bad,,, is this normal

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robinsnest2111 · 10 days

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sorry for disappearing. I promised I wouldn't do that again but it's always the thing I fall back on in desperate times. idk how to stop doing that

I'm just so tired and in pain, I wanna lay down and cry and never get back up again

#wish i could cry. as it is the tears are pressing on my eyes but cannot come out. it hurts. i wish it wouldn't hurt #all i can do is sleep as much as i can whenever i can. no other way to escape it all #trying to plan my mental illness breakdown around my work hours so my coworkers don't have to worry #i actually like being at work and putting on a smile and acting bright and bubbly comes to me so easily #but i feel the tiredness creeping in. making work a bit more difficult and i don't like that #my brain is starting to merge dreams and reality in a way that hard to tell apart #it's also whispering evil things into my ear. like: you're not mentally ill there's no official diagnosis so better be sane and normal #or: you're making it all up. stop with that. just be normal. <- about literally every single thing #<- like me dealing with depression and anxiety and probably no small amount of trauma and gender dysphoria? NOT REAL according to my brain #which is. idk i KNOW i struggle with all of these things and there have been suspicion diagnoses #but no actual 100% confirmed diagnoses and that fact is fueling my brain in whispering these mean things to me #and i'm just so very very tired of it all... i don't want to fight anymore but i'm also too scared to take any kind of final action #sorry...#delete later

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striderhead · 2 years

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ONE DAY I'M GONNA GET STRETCHED TOO HARD AND SNAP LIKE A RUBBER BAND!

#dirk strider #homestuck #eyestrain #HIII FIRST POST!#i drew this listening to um hello kitty by jazmin bean #which is where the lyric is from #and why he has cat ears #i really liked the sort of manic feeling to the song its like #mental breakdown music #perfect for dirk #i usually wouldnt ask this but considering this is my first post on a new blog rbs are appreciated! but im not making anyone haha #love u :) more dirks to come

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murdererofthumbs · 1 year

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Listen, although I do find it pretty exciting to see Kendall entering his Evil Era and actually becoming a killer, I can’t stop thinking about the consequences of him leaking all the shitty mud information they have on Logan. Like yeah, PR-wise that might be a great idea, it might actually solidify his position as a CEO (and he is obviously going to try and fuck up Matsson deal and take over the Waystar - I don’t know why he would want to captain the fucking sinking Titanic, but okay). But on the other hand, all the dirt coming out about Logan will be potentially catastrophic for Roman. Apart from the fact that Kendall is very clearly betraying his brother, literally like 5 seconds after he preached about them being a team; Roman will very likely suffer the most if stuff about Logan being an abusive father comes out.

First, it will flip his whole viewpoint upside down - he is so deep in denial and so trauma-bonded to Logan that he doesn’t even acknowledge his abuse, not even when in happens in real time. He doesn’t want to see his father as a monster and as his abuser, because that would actually require him to accept that he was a victim, that he was this beaten dog that everyone already sees him as (to one degree or another). Not to mention all the lies he tells himself about Logan and him being a good dad will go straight down the drain, and can you imagine what happens when something you believed for 40-or-so years cracks down in front of you? Kendall is about to break his reality.

Another aspect is that exposing Roman’s abuse to the whole world will likely destroy any and all opportunities that Roman ever had when it comes to rising to power (even if I’m unsure how much he actually cares about becoming a CEO). He might get some sympathy points, although I very much doubt that he will ever accept that form of pity from anyone. His image will be forever tainted and solidified as “the abused one” or the “one that was hit by his dad”. Can you imagine Roman’s reaction when that whole shitshow leaks? He does say at some point in the preview that he is finished, and although it might allude to Gerri putting out the whole dick pic situation, it might also very well be that his public image will forever now revolve around how his dad hit and abused him (his dad who was essentially his god in more than one way, who he was, and is trauma bonded to, who he came back to time and time again).

Kendall has a tendency of using his siblings trauma to forward his own position (even when he wanted to one up Logan in episode 2 by bringing up Roman’s and Connor’s trauma) and this is no different. But it’s a very easy way for him to blow up whatever alliance was ever between sibs. So yeah, I think Kendall as a killer is a great thing to watch, but also… well, Roman girl in me is already screaming in the void from the possible pain we might come to watch unravel in real time.

#succession #roman roy #like my boy might be delusional about pre-greving or whatever #but the fact is that he is for some real mental breakdown #if all the emotions and everything comes down on him like a ton of bricks #and lets not forget that Roman is innately incapable of actually dealing with his own emotions #everything he feels or might potentially feel gets locked up in a cage (hah) and the key gets immediately thrown out #he retreats into himself just to not feel stuff that might break him #not to mention that I was very carefully watching him for past 2 episodes #and just going by his breathing patterns (yes I know insanity of a fan)#but Roman seems to be constantly on the verge of a panic attack #so imagine what will happen when he will be aggressively confronted with all the shit he doesn’t want to face or acknowledge #im torn between obv not wanting it for him #but I also strive on my favourite characters being in pain #and i have not seen roman breakdown yet #and im actually a bit hungry for it #so yeah #kendall is a killer and his brother might very well be his new victim #(hopefully not in a literal sense I don’t fucking want any deaths im also not emotionally equipped for that)#succession hbo #kendall roy #kieran culkin #succession 4x04 #succession season 4 #marta rumbles poetically #succession spoilers

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kingmlem · 1 year

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I don't care what anyone says.

This:

Is a literal sweetheart. Y'all are just mean.

No, I will not:

Be taking criticism

Shut up about this

#mlem plays #gotham knights #wb montreal gotham knights #i love him #i love his character in the game #i would let this man do unspeakable things to me #and then let him cook me breakfast in the morning.#'but mlem he's ugly-' LOOK AT HIS EYES #this boy *feels* it. whatever *it* is.#also we stan a therapy king #love that for him #jason todd #thank you for coming to my ted talk #its my mental breakdown i get to choose the hyperfixation; gotham knights #i reiterate; This man/baby/angel deserves fucking recognition and i will die on this hill.#that is 100% my number 1 fictional husband #your honor #he's my babygirl

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slashingdisneypasta · 2 months

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I am so FUCKING RELIEVED.

I finally managed to get my hands on my school transcript and sent it into work- and I got a pay bump!

Now, I'm still not earning a liveable wage-- but if I get my diploma (i currently have a cert III, which is the level down from that), I will be perfect <3 I am only j u s t below my goal salary, now. Almost the same as my mum.

Thank. god.

#i was so fucking stressed an anxious last week with that on my mind 😅😅 had a little mental breakdown 😅😅😅 thought i failed already😅😅#but i feel so much better now XD 😅💚💚💚#just need to find an online course ^^#i feel so good actually XDD #i can totally go back to school if I know for sure that when i come out again i'll be okay

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femme-malewife · 7 months

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Wanna think about something canon

Aiyuu pulling a yuri and going to the aquarium together and Yujiro wanting a stuffed penguin and entering a rock-paper-scissors tournament with Aizou and losing while Aizou wins and upon seeing Yujiro disappointed he gives it to him like as if it was a shoujo manga where the guy wins the girl a prize at a carnival

and then Yujiro hugs it and gives him his consolation prize and Aizou can't help but smile softly at Yujiro seeing him so happy

...Yeah

#i need more of this #im having a mental breakdown over lipxlip #mv is coming up me thinks #i can feel it in my bones

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nxctern · 10 months

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There’s been something building up in my chest and mind for a while now

It’s an odd feeling

#idk what it is but it’s been hurting a lot these past months and it keeps growing #it feels both like a huge hole in me and something so so so so full of emotions about to burst at the same time #i cant cry at all either nothing comes out so im left with this buildup of things inside that eat me up and make me want to #try things i shouldnt do in an attempt to be able to release some pressure. idk what it is. idk why it’s been getting so bad lately its just #my chest keeps feeling tighter and tighter and in a way i’m just like ‘well i hope my heart stops soon’#oh well it is what it is i’ll just see how many more weeks or months it can take i’ll keep u updated on when i have a full blown mental #breakdown where a year of negative emotions just come out 👍🏻 or maybe not depends on how it goes #oh i didnt mean to write so much heres a boring doodle from yesterday or a 2 days ago i think?#txt #was feelin blue for some reason #im hoping that the mental health will get the kind of bad where i make a lot of sad emo pieces in an attempt to not kms #those are my best works

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booksandpaperss · 1 year

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Sooo after my bestie @wayward-sherlock pointed out that Achilles Come Down by Gang of Youths is literally the perfect song for Mike getting Vecna’d and Will begging him to live and come back, I listened to the song again and promptly had a mini mental breakdown, so then ofc I listened to I Know the End bc I was in the right mood, and I ended up feeling really inspired so-

-I spit balled a poem about Mike getting Vecna’d from Will’s POV. It *attempts* to combine phrases, motifs, and themes from Achilles Come Down and I Know the End, and it is definitely one of the messiest poems I have ever written in my typical poetry style so I have no idea if it’s genius or literal word vomit (it definitely will not make sense to u if you don’t listen to the two songs so go and do that if u haven’t already at some point), but I figured I should share it here and let you guys decide that hehe (cries)

Haha anyway… Enjoy the results of my Greek mythology and Pheobe Bridgers induced mental breakdown 🫡

To Swing in our Rusty Memory (like the age old pact)

An old, haunted house

Somewhere in Indiana

Old memories

A swingset, rusty and

Metal damp from Rain

Do you remember

The promise

The pact we made

Do you, do you, do you

Don’t.

Don't listen to Him

Stay, and swing

Swing with me

In my loving memory

I’ll keep you close

Where you go, I’ll go too

So tell me

Tell me, is it the same

For you

Would you stay

Will you stay

Stay and swing

Swing with me

A reason to live or to die, you say

Oh sure

Just rip

Rip him away from me

Just go ahead and rip and tear

him away

All I have left

Of a happier time

Of a swingset

Rusty with rain

Lie, lie, lie

That is all

all they do

Do not listen to their whispers

Their callousness

It is all a Falsehood

I beg of you, Do not listen.

When we held

One another

An innocent touch

Hand to hand

So light

How can that be Wrong

Please, please, remember

Remember our

Swingset

All rusty and old

When you reached for my hand

It can be new again

We

Can be new

New again

As the end approaches

As the world falls away

I want, I need

Need you

By my side

So please, please

Step away from Him

From Them

Choose the Rain

The Rust

Choose Us.

Choose our swingset

And come Swing

Swing with me

In our loving Memory

I promise

Like our age old pact

Where you go, I’m going

Like our age old pact

The End is near

So come. Come Home

And I swear won’t desert you

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localdemigendergoblin · 26 days

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Me on my way to go ruin my conservative Christian grandma's Easter by coming out as a trans boy:

#HAHAHAHHDNDBDBSB #I CANNOT WAIT FOR THE LOOK ON HER FACE #(also haven't come out to my mom and sis yet so... I'll also have to do that)#but I have a feeling they'll be fine with it #Alr came out to my dad after I had a(nother) mental breakdown #I sadly have to wait until Monday.#It'll be worth it #I'll prob ruin my Easter aswell #I'll cry if they don't let me buy a binder after coming out #transgender #pansexual #bisexual #lgbtq #queer #Easter #coming out

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crownedwille · 1 month

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How can you make yourself not care about the thing you care very much about? Asking for a friend

#my chest feels so tight and like it's aching since yesterday now #i'm so mentally and physically affected by how much the ending bothers me #i wish i wouldn't care so much about the show and i could just shrug it off #i really want a different obsession right now just so i wouldn't care so much about a stupid tv show ending #it's ridiculous it's so stupid #why am i freaking out about it so much and getting all depressed about it #it shouldn't matter so much #it just makes me so upset idk i hate it #everyone is over the moon and happy and here i am having a fucking breakdown #maybe i should take a break from the fandom and from the blog #i try to focus on the positive and things i like but my mind just keeps coming back to it #and maybe i just need to not see any young royals right now #i haven't even watched the documentary yet. i wanted to today but it was too much #if it affects me so badly then that's not good. that's not how it should be

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0-k-4 · 4 months

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crazy times. everyone is depressed. is it because of school, is it because of winter, is it because of Life. who knows. mystère et boule de gomme.

#some girl in my class is having a solid three mental breakdowns per week + having BPD #another guy is sleeping three hours per night because of stress and running on sheer will and cafeine #lots of us do not eat lunch anymore. staying in class to work instead. some of us stopped sleeping too to get more work time #at least four of five of us for forty students are seeing a therapist and are under medication #people are literaly fighting for their lives with the second row of exams coming #lots of us are fantasizing about dropping and going to uni #not even speaking about the Scholarly Losts that do absolutely not know where they are going or what they want to do and feel like they are #doing all of that for nothing #even the teachers are worn out lmao what is this #they didnt lie that third year can really beat your ass #anyway #i kind of enjoy it. the suffering of my people. make things more fun like none of us think they are doing good. it is funny #the global Wtf are we doing atmosphere gives some sense of fraternity #i will miss it when its done

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isolationaroundus · 1 month

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You know when you're upset and then think about upsetting things and now you're even more upset

#fucking hell #I've been feeling a massive mental breakdown is coming for like a week now #this is not good #not good at all #I need to cope through it somehow

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chaunceydollz · 7 months

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I know I shouldn’t miss alotta school days but my physical and mental health have just been so discombobulating 🧍🏽

#already had to go to my art teacher once #for a breakdown I had like 3 weeks ago💀#my therapist hasn’t been answering my calls either #I’m trying to so hard to use my next break as motivation but it’s just ughh #dunno when my next depressive episode will come #idk if it being my senior year is making feel horrible mentally wise or what #but I feel like it is #because of personal insecurities I have about college #especially with my low GPA #vent #non sims #random #sorry for the long vent.

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