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hyperfixiation-station · 4 months

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Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Information Pt.3

TW: Blood, Torture, Violence

Summary: You get rescued(finally)

Part 1, Part 2

Silent. From the moment Price had found you in that dingy cell, broken and bleeding, that was all you had been. You were silent when they moved you, though it had to have hurt with how many broken bones and lacerations you had. You were silent when the medics asked you where you were injured, how you had been hurt. You were silent through the debriefings, through the desperate attempts to find out what you had been through, what secrets you had spilled. You were silent through all of it.

It wasn’t your fault, not really. A mental barrier you had constructed during months of torture to keep secrets from spilling, a dam built with a mantra of DON’T TALK to keep your thoughts at bay as your captors repeatedly tried to draw them out of you.

Even now, when the rational part of your brain knew you were safe, knew that these men, the men you served with, the men who had tracked you down and saved you, were to be trusted, the barrier would not fall.

Every ‘what did they want from you, what did you see, did you recognize them, how many of them were there’ was met with silence. Anytime you opened your mouth you were hit with a wave of fear so strong it sent you into a panic attack.

They understood, in part. They had seen recordings, seen the rooms, seen your broken body at the time of rescue.

It took them 2 days to get to you after figuring out your location. They went in guns blazing, and tore the place to the ground. They split up, Price and Gaz taking the left with Soap and Ghost taking the right. They shot at anything that moved in their quest for vengeance, breaking down doors and checking every nook and cranny for where you might be locked up.

Price found you about a quarter of the way into the camp. He took the bottom floor and Gaz took the top as they cleared the building. He had stopped before a door that was different, metal and welded shut with a small little flap in the middle, instead of solid and wooden like the others. It took him and Gaz some prying and metalwork, but they got the door open.

Price almost cried when his eyes adjusted to the change in light. You lay curled in the corner, back to the wall as you shied away from the light. Your hair was tangled and matted with dried blood, your clothes were torn and dirty and your skin was crusted with so much blood and grime that he couldn’t even see you underneath it.

“Y/n?” He had called, but there was no response. He crept slowly toward you, keeping his movements as open and relaxed as possible. He crouched in front of you, taking note of your dilated pupils, sunken eyes, obviously malnourished form. He winced at the weird bulges in your skin, indicative of broken bones.

“Sorry love.” He whispered to you, taking a steadying breath as he slid his arms under you and lifted. Hise expected you to cry out, the action no doubt causing unspeakable pain, but you didn’t. In fact, you didn’t react at all. He didn’t dwell on it then, opting to get you somewhere safe and secure.

“9 broken ribs, a broken left femur, both shoulders dislocated, pneumonia, dehydration and severe malnutrition, multiple lacerations that required stitches, broken wrists, all 10 fingers broken, right kneecap dislocated, multiple concussions, and a hairline fracture on their skull.” The doctor had said. It hurt all of them to hear how badly wounded you were.

They gave you two weeks to recover before asking any questions. The first week you were unconscious, in a coma as your body tried to heal you. The second week you spent in worrying silence, saying nothing to anyone, not to your doctors, not to your teammates, not to your friends.

Price sent Ghost in first. He had had similar experiences and Price figured he would be able to relate. However when Ghost came storming out an hour later, slamming the door behind him, he came to regret that decision.

“I got over it.” He had said, “Why can’t they?” Price reminded him that not everyone responds to trauma the same way and sent him away.

Soap tried next, and came out near tears after sending you into a panic attack after calling you ‘Little Bird’. He was confused until Ghost not-so-gently reminded him of the video they had seen, of the words ‘Pretty Bird’ being used over and over. Ghost pretended not to hear him throwing up in the toilet later.

Gaz tried, to no avail. He ended up just sitting in silence with you, showing you videos of his cats. He counted it a victory when your busted lips twitched into a tiny grin for a few seconds.

And on and on it went, with refusing to speak to anyone. They were losing hope until the psychiatrist finally spoke with you.

“GIve them time.” She said gently, “You trying to force a response will just make this worse.”

So they do. The higher-ups still want answers, of course, but Price manages to dissuade them from asking until you are out of the hospital. They spend the weeks treating you as normal as possible, stopping by to give you updates on missions, show you a video of Soap absolutely biffing it in training, tell you the latest gossip of which recruit is sleeping with who. But even though they are trying, they still handle you with kiddie gloves, afraid that the wrong word or look will make you shatter irreversibly.

Which brings you to now. It’s nearly 2 A.M, and visiting hours are long over as you stand unsteadily in the bathroom, staring at your pale, pathetic form in the mirror. You open and close your mouth, trying and failing to get words out, the barrier cemented in your mind by blood and tears too strong to break down.

‘Speak, you stupid fucking bitch!’ You scream mentally at yourself, ‘You have to speak! If you don’t you'll be discharged and you'll never be able to serve again! They already think you’re broken, and if you can’t tell them different they’ll never treat you the same. Stop. being. So. Fucking. Pathetic.’

Tears streak your cheeks as you slide down the wall. You draw your knees up, hiding your face in them as your shoulders shake with silent sobs. Rationally, you know you are safe. Rationally, you know that if you were to speak, nothing would happen. But it’s not the rational part of your brain that is keeping you from speaking.

Going dark in that hellhole you were trapped in had saved your life, and you couldn’t seem to get past it. Sure, not responding had almost killed you right at first, as Kravchenko became more and more ruthless in his attempts to get you to speak again, but eventually he grew bored. His little plaything had lost its sparkle, and he locked you in a cell and threw away the key as soon as he lost interest. But starving to death was still a better alternative to the all-consuming agony that had been your day-to-day.

And now, the subconscious, irrational part of your brain was convinced that if you spoke you’d be dragged right back and strapped to a table, that you’d wake up to find that your rescue had all been a dream. That you-

“-/n! Y/N! Y/N!” You flinch, startled out of your reverie. You look down to see rivulets of blood running down your arms, your nails having gouged holes into your skin. You look up to see the eyes of a worried nurse, holding your hands in hers.

“There you are. We lost you for a minute. Do you mind letting me bandage you up here?” Her voice is soft and gentle and you find yourself nodding, letting her lead you back to your bed where she cleans and bandages your upper arms.

“What are you doing up so late sweetie?” Her voice is calming, almost hypnotic, “I mean, I’m awake cause I get paid to be, but you should be sleeping all your injuries away, shouldn’t you dearie? If I was you, I’d of been cryin’ too, being awake at 2 A.M. for free.” She laughs, the sound echoing through the room, “Course, I suppose you probably think I’m crazy for agreeing to work this shift anyways. Did you know I was supposed to have this shift off? But Roberta’s kids have the flu and so I agreed-” She keeps talking, her voice soothing your fears and helping you relax. YOu can’t help but mentally thank Roberta’s kids for being sick, for sending this wonderful lady who does not treat you like you're going to break at any moment to you tonight.

“And that should about do it dearie. Just press that little call button if you need any more help, alright?” She says cheerfully. She squeezes your hand and heads to the door before pausing.

“Make sure to get some sleep.” She leaves, gently closing the door behind her. Something about her makes you feel safer than you have since falling off that helicopter. Maybe it was her motherly demeanor, maybe it was the fact that she treated you like a normal human being, maybe it was the fact that she could have put you on a psych hold an ddin;t, but whatever it was, you loved her for it.

And as the door closes and the room stills, you whisper a quiet “thanks.”

Part 4?

~tags~

@louthedino @scarletdfox @dangerkitten1705 @warenai @spineless-spino @rainy-darling

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yourspacevirus · 3 months

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Dedicated to that one person probably.

#who?#i don't really know #tf2 #tf2 medic #tf2 soldier #fruit scones #i'd use american healthcare but i dont think the paramedics want to see this #heavymedic on top but these guys are okay #soldier's my favorite mercenary #second only to engie

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deltarune-au-domain · 1 year

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Thank you Toby Fox.

#truck freak #april fools #i assume #i don't really know #im busy #undertale #deltarune

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tblsomedoodles · 11 months

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My current DnD character is literally just Raph

soooo

as part of my irl job i get to play DnD once a month with a varying group of like 9-14 year olds. Usually i play a little Tiefling Cleric to keep all party members alive. but I recently found that I could made a damn ninja turtle in dnd so i played a DnD version of Raph this saturday instead.

first of all, it was great, i drew these during the game. (cleaned them up digitally later)

Second, i feel so bad for this dude, b/c he literally spend the entire session chasing children around a cave as they tried to do EVERYTHING except the mission. he was just so done that at one point he was physically pushing a group of them into the next room lol.

Anyways, i may do more with this at somepoint in the future, but i don't want to really get too distracted with it now. (and i would get very distracted with it.) so for now, just enjoy my DnD Raph turned babysitter lol : )

#tmnt #my doodles #tmnt raph #dnd #dnd turtles #just tagging it now so i will be able to find it later #will this turn into it's own iteration?#i don't really know #all i know is i have a dnd version of raph #and he just wants to find his brothers or fight stuff #and he can't do either lol #he's stuck being a babysitter

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ivebeendownsincejuly · 1 day

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to me clara bow is taylor appreciating the women who came before her, and the women who came after her, while also criticising the industry that she is such a big part of, and doing both of those at once is just so her

#i don't really know #ttpd #taylor swift #clara bow #the tortured poets department

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alchemicon · 1 year

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Am i the only one that feels weird when people describe dazai as a womanizer, say he fucked the nurse etc? Like to me he is so gay coded that i just can't take his whole flirting with women thing seriously. It feels part of his clown persona and not a sincere representation of his character at all. I know that irl dazai was a womanizer, but bsd takes inspiration from the lives of the authors and twists the events to craft entirely new characters (eg dazai was the one who admired akutagawa irl not the other way around). And one important thing is how none of his relationships with women have any substance. He's shown to respect them sure, but emotionally his relations to them are completely empty. He admires their beauty, but it is with men that he always has deeper emotional connections with (his life was literally changed by chuuya and oda, because of his relationship with them) I think people who genuinely consider him a womanizer, fall for his act, his clown mask if you will.

#bsd #bungou stray dogs #dazai #i don't really know #i just don't really like the whole idea of him fucking the nurse #given what we know happened to irl dazai #plus my man was literally shot through the chest #idk how any shagging could have taken place but y'all are free to give your input #soukoku #like my man flirts with every male on the show #grabbing sigma by the waist and dancing w him #touching chuuya's cheek even though he didn't need to #when he nullified corruption #whatever the hell he and fyodor have going on

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which-qsmp-egg-would · 15 days

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As someone that has sort of a blog sona (a fae crow thing), that's a big mood. The guy is you but also not you. That's a guy and sometimes you're that guy for fun? That guy is your business you? It's something.

You.

You get it.

#pspspspsps you should make an eggsona for the playdate project pspspspsps #not a poll #ask #'that guy is business you' very accurate lol #I don't mind if people refer to ME as the EGG Poll #same goes the other way around #It doesn't really bother me at this point in time?#I don't really know

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tiny-katara · 2 years

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I can totally buy that Zuko could fall in love with Katara. She’s amazing. But why would Katara fall in love with Zuko? She may have forgiven him and become friends with him, but it’s one thing to become friends with a former enemy and another love them. Zuko really hurt her in many ways. Please don’t think I’m trying to be rude, I’m just genuinely curious. I want to understand the way Zutara shippers think. I have to because the ship is so popular.

no you're totally fine anon! your question is perfectly respectful and i have no issue answering. in fact, it would be a pleasure :)

now i can only give you my perspective on why i believe katara could/would fall for zuko and a lot of it is heavily based on my own experience as i do relate to katara in more ways than i'd like to admit lol. anyways... let's begin (this will definitely be extrememly long).

zuko definitely did a lot to hurt katara, but she forgives him in the show and they are ride or die besties immediately afterwards. katara strikes me as someone who forgives wholly and completely upon seeing a genuine effort to be better and zuko showed that to her. i really don't think if she hadn't completely let the past go they would've been able to joke around like they do in ember island players, so i don't really see that in particular barring their potential relationship. might just be me tho lol.

the thing about katara is that she is very good at taking on others' burdens but very poor at asking for help with hers and i think this has a lot to do with the death of her mother.ccanonically, katara immediately fills the void her mother left behind. mothers generally take on the burdens of their children and expect nothing in return--as it should be! children are not responsible for dealing with an adult's problem. all this really goes to say that katara is a character that struggles to receive help because she's been channeling what she saw her mom do and it pretty much outright says in the runaway that katara is the motherly figure of the group and that responsibilty is heavy weight to bear, but one she does anyway. she takes care of everyone, but she really struggles to allow herself to share her inner turmoil with everyone as a result. like we do see her talk about how she lost her mother a fair amount with people, but very rarely do we see her discuss the specific impact it had on her with them. it's almost always used as her method of empathizing with people who have suffered as a result of the war, not as a means to gain closure.

katara does tell one character the full story of what happened to her mother and the character she chooses to share that with is zuko–which is absolutely crazy if i'm being honest! it says a lot that katara is able to speak her mind more freely to someone who has deeply hurt her than her friends/family--and not necessarily bad things. again, it just shows that katara feels like they need her to be the tough one, or the caregiver, but she never does that to zuko. he's one of the few characters katara can freely express herself to and that's not just me making assumptions, that's canonical. it's insane when you're watching through the show and looking for katara's most vulnerable and honest moments and noticing that a lot of them occur around zuko. it's pretty clear that katara feels some kind of connection with zuko from like the first moment they have an actual conversation. like our girl just pulled that spirit water we'd all forgotten about and deemed fixing zuko's esteem issues worthy of it.

if you step back and think about it though, zuko and katara are some of the most similar characters in the show. both of them are very passionate people who fight for what they think is right. both deeply understand the meaning of a sacrifice since their mothers both gave up their lives for theirs (ursa obviously isn't dead but from zuko's reaction in the show he clearly thinks she is and she did still sacrifice her current life/lifestyle). both are pretty emotional and reactive if they're pushed to it. both are deeply empathetic, which often drives their sense of justice. it makes sense that katara would feel more comfortable opening up to him because zuko just gets it.

now this isn't about kata/ag and i don't want this to turn into anything like that, but this is the reason a lot of us zutara folk don't like kata/ag. no offense to aang, but our boy is 12. he is not going to be good at emotions and deep-rooted trauma no matter how wise and knowledgeable he may be lol. He just doesn't notice this struggle of katara's, and this isn't exclusive to aang. none of the members of team avatar are ever truly able to see this in katara and actively try to help her. that is until zuko.

the southern raiders is an episode that is wildly controversial across the fandom. there is no denying that lol. my interpretation will no doubt be different from yours, especially since it seems like you ship kata/ang (? this is not meant offensively love whatever you what anon!). in this episode we katara finally snap. she isn't being kind and caring, she's being selfish and angry--which let's be real, she deserves. like i said, none of the members of the team ever really notice that she's bearing the brunt of the weight in the group and our girl is doing a lot. it's really just a culmination of her family separating again, the burden of playing mother, the long journey (you can't tell me she's not completely exhausted), and the hurt zuko caused. everything builds up and katara does say some things that she definitely should not have, but it's mostly because of how blunt and hurtful they are.

a bit of a side note, but katara's comment to sokka is something that has always bugged me. i hate that we didn't get a scene between the two in which they reconcile and actually talk about what she said, because basically what she said boils down to "even though we shared the same mom and experience, the trauma we went through as a result is not the same." that statement is 100% accurate. sokka is very clearly not carrying around the same baggage katara is. it's pretty clear that katara feels responsible on some level for her mother's death as she is the last waterbender and that's why the fire nation was there in the first place. it's obviously not her fault, but we don't always process these things in the most logical ways now do we?

anyway, katara is hurting very badly in this episode and we see her lash out at zuko specifically, which is completely understandable. he’s from the nation that killed her after all and then on top of that royalty lol. it's the perfect storm really. i think it's important to note that although katara doesn't exactly state what's wrong apart from mentioning the betrayal in ba sing se, zuko is able to see how much she's actually hurting and tries to fix it as best he can. we also see zuko defending katara's decisions throughout the episode. he has her back 100% and he never expresses any sense of disappointment in her. zuko trusts katara's judgment and choices, something we don't see aang or sokka do in that episode. a partner should be able to let you make your own choices and have your back. zuko's giving katara that chance and he isn't telling her what to do or expressing disappointment in her actions.

this is probably based more on my own preferences, but i really don't think it's unrealistic for a teenage girl to fall for someone who is older and cares for her. i mean the guy jumped in front of lightning for her??? like idk but it would definitely make my heart skip a beat especially if he's also someone you get along with quite well. the two are ride or die besties in the span of like an episode. AND katara actually is amused by him on some level as seen in ember island players when they have their little moments of banter. all of the boys katara shows interest in before the finale/that aren't aang are older too. jet is older and if you count haru he is too (it's up to you there, i personally don't really know how to feel about it). that's also without mentioning how strikingly similar zuko and jet look. it is absolutely wild how closely they resemble each other, so it really doesn't seem outside the realm of possibility to say that zuko would fit katara's aesthetic if you will lol.

something else that is fairly unique to zuko is that he always treats katara as his equal. katara and zuko are always battling on the same level and he never acts like she can't handle herself. in my opinion, zuko is the one who shows the most respect for katara's bending abilities. zuko asks her to come fight azula with him because of that. like he definitely acknowledges that toph is also insanely powerful, but katara is someone who worked hard for what she is, and that's something zuko had to do himself. he knows exactly how hard it is to work for what she has and i think that understanding of her innate talent and work ethic are both reasons she would zuko to be an appealing partner, especially since katara has always had to demand that respect from other people. zuko respects it without her saying a word and i think it's safe to say that pretty much everyone wants a partner who acknowledges their talents and abilities without being specifically asked. i think this also ties in with part of her affections for jet because he also showed interested and respect for her bending. i mean he also did abuse her bending but still! katara would not put up with someone who didn’t show her respect.

zuko is just a more appealing partner than anyone else to me. he grows up a lot and has a strong sense of responsibility, is empathetic, passionate and ambitious, kinda dorky and awkward, and all around trying to be the best person he can be. those are pretty attractive qualities in a partner, so it just makes sense to me for katara to feel similarly, especially since i very much identity with her character lol.

so that was absurdly long, but i hope that helped your understanding of zutara! it's a ship that very strongly values strong individuals that are similar and different and respect each other as equals. my explanation is a bit messy and all over the place, but i really hope you did find it insightful! if you want a better and more in-depth view of the ship, i would recommend this video by snzeey reviews (its a long one but it is extremely thorough). she's able to explain it very politely and with much less bias than me. she even talks about how aang in a very respectful way, which I will admit to failing at lol. book 3 aang drives me up the wall!

anyways thanks for your ask :) i am so sorry it took me so long to answer but i have literally thought about it all the time since receiving it lol. it was a lot of fun <3

#sorry this took me a while to put out anon #i had a lot to say #and i loved writing this out #zutara #zutara meta #i guess lol #i don't really know

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the-white-soul · 3 months

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*Flowey holds the ladder still while people go up.* That was a good idea! Although since we have all these human souls we COULD HAVE broken the barrier. I guess walking all the way there is less convenient though, huh?

So we're coming back out from where humans fell. I find it's amazing how that Mo guy has a ladder so big it'll actually get us outta here this way! And that it somehow fit hidden in his stand. Luckily even if someone isn't good at climbing there's always the flower bed to fall back on! Heh... Just don't fall on me.

*Once everyone gets up to the surface, Flowey looks all around himself cautiously. Who knows if people are following them again or planning a surprise attack in advance.*

So, where do you think Clover and their soldier gang would be? Do we know where we're going? If we don't find them, how are we going to tell them we "surrender" and came to the surface "peacefully?"

(Kara) "The best plans are made at the spot like D-day. Come on everyone let's..."

(Clover) "What are you doing come to test my patience. Or have you finally figured out beating me is impossible."

(Kara) "Option A."

(Clover) "Perfect. So now why did you bring me all these monsters. You want to be friends!!! Well how could I say no when you give me such a good present I should give one too."

*Clover blows up the Underground leaving only 100 monsters alive.*

Kara was just on the ground knees planted and just trying to comprehend what just happened. They didn't want to cry to appear tough but after realizing Noelle was crying even more they thought it was acceptable.

(Noelle) "You, you BITCH!!!"

(Kara) "Noelle we have to remain calm the plan can only work if..."

(Noelle) "Screw the plan I'm tired of being a puppet from you all. You cry all the time of having Merg being controlling. OH BOO HOO. Wah ha ha."

*Noelle started laughing a laugh Kara thought they only have seen from Chara. It seemed like she had so much hate it was all flooding out.*

(Noelle) "You should...*Snif* YOU SHOULD KNOW how it feels to be a puppet huh? Well how about just being bossed around doing whatever you tell me to do like Susie... and of course the stupid Flower. You know what screw it, you're the nicest thing I've ever met. At least you don't control people like puppets anymore and can admit fault. I'm going to kill Clover right now and there's nothing you can do to stop me."

*Noelle cast snow... but Clover refuse. GUN*

(Clover) "That was you plan, *PFFT* Weak. Get her body."

(Noelle) "You think that can kill me? You know what I'm done with this. 100 monsters, good luck Kara. You save 100 and kill a million.*Noelle leaves the universe.*"

(Clover) "Well too bad for you, right?"

(Kara) "No, I know I can't beat you anymore, but I sure am going to save who I can. You will reset."

#undertale #the white soul #kara #flowey #ask flowey #noelle holiday #Is this unsatisfying?#I don't really know #This whole battle seems cool but please if you find any problems comment them below.

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