#I don't know what to do with my life

[ilis-boris]

i hate your friends.

cw blood !!

#artwork #digital painting #fan art #artists on tumblr #digital art #ranfren #satoru ranfren #randals friends #ranfren fanart #cw blood #satoru tsukada #i don't know what to do with my life

[biancanofep]

Who's your godly parent?

#percy jackson #godly parent #gods of olympus #help I'm bored #I don't know what to do with my life

[jjlriya]

No les pasa que van a la peluquería y en vez de cortarles el pelo les cortan la cabeza? A mí me pasa muy seguido, de hecho me pasó mañana. 😱

Just my friend having some fun like the mature teenager he is.

#i dont know what this is #I don't know what to do with my life #help #hi

[tenitchyfingers]

still not over the end of Barry

#did anyone notice perhaps #i don't know what to do with my life #this shit is hitting harder than i thought it would #and i don't even know what to do about it #generally i'd write fanfiction but i don't have ships here #and i have no notes #i don't want the story to go in another direction #and the original is just perfect as it is #no need to add or change anything #but it also breaks my heart genuinely #fundamentally Barry Berkman is a flawed man who had so much potential to be a good person #and in multiple instances he showed he was always capable of actual love for another human being #hell the bit where he gets Sally after she killed that guy #and told her 'you didn't do this i did - say barry berkman did this' even though he didn't #because the reasoning is 'i'm already broken and a goner & i don't want you to become like me' #what is that if not selfless love #barry hbo #and in many ways i really relate to the feeling of being fundamentally broken #i'm not a murderer but i've felt broken and completely alone so often - matter of fact that's how i live my life #so i can't help it - i'll never resist empathizing with a broken soul #when the world's kicked the shit out of you enough you get it

[bordelz]

I was scrolling threw my sisters instagram, searching a gift idea.

I just bursted in tears at the idea of "I wish I was a normal person like you"

Maybe I'm not so fine.

#i'm unwell #i'm queer #i'm lost #i'm autistic #(she may be also but she got the “i'm mastering a double cursus” autisme) #i don't know what to do with my life #i wish people could see me as I am but i'm afraid they won't like me #i love my friends and lovers i love my queerness but i wish i could share this joy in every situation

[larascorner]

I've been going through a quarter life crisis for over a year, how long will it last?

#i don't know what to do with my life #quarter life crisis

[fizzyforlifebitch13]

#archive of our own #ao3feed #i don't know what to do with my life

[louisemwrites]

When are you coming up with new novel

I actually have something in the works right now. I'm just a bit hesitant to free it to the world just yet because I have a lot of stuff going on right now. And because I think it's too... er, fluffy and too shoujo-ish? I'll have to talk to my editor first. Then I'll update you guys as soon as I can.

Still, here's a short preview of what I've been writing:

That irritated me and I looked at him. "Are you threatening me?" Big mistake. Because once he caught my gaze, he held it and for a long moment, stared at me, making me even more uncomfortable. Then he leaned into me and whispered in my ear, "Accidents happen all the time and it could happen especially around you. It's a dangerous world so do be careful." I couldn't say anything to that. I only could stare at him in terror. He smirked and leaned the side of his head onto the palm of his hand. "What a nice face you're making." I turned my head away but I could still feel his stare bore into the side of my skull. "What? Clam up? How boring." "Are you trying to freak me out?" "Don't be rude. I'm just worried about you." "You're the one being rude. Is this how you worry about someone?" "My bad." Fingers suddenly latched around the back of my neck, jerking my head around until I was inches away from his face and looking straight into his beautiful but cruel eyes. "But we should be face-to-face when we talk. Shouldn't we?"

Yeah, that's about it. Hope you'll like this when it's released. (๑°꒵°๑)･*♡

#blog post #writing blog #i don't know what to do with my life #am i in a quarter life crisis? #send help

[psychotic-fangirl369]

Finished university, now having to job hunt and adult.... but let’s just rewatch Teen Wolf for the 100th time because why not 🤷‍♀️😂❤️

#teen wolf #adulting #university #fangirl #stiles #scott #tw #job hunting #i don't know what to do with my life #what should a fangirl who spends all her time binging tv shows reading and writing fanfictio do as a career #seriously i need help

[butchfalin]

the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again

#yeehaw #1k #5k #10k #posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours? #also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that! #unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference #edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense #also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags #1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now #he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic #2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign #like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock #3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing #it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is #extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once #it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life #i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about #Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect #if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it #aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week

[inkskinned]

at some point it's just like. do they even fucking like the thing they're asking AI to make? "oh we'll just use AI for all the scripts" "we'll just use AI for art" "no worries AI can write this book" "oh, AI could easily design this"

like... it's so clear they've never stood in the middle of an art museum and felt like crying, looking at a piece that somehow cuts into your marrow even though the artist and you are separated by space and time. they've never looked at a poem - once, twice, three times - just because the words feel like a fired gun, something too-close, clanging behind your eyes. they've never gotten to the end of the movie and had to arrive, blinking, back into their body, laughing a little because they were holding their breath without realizing.

"oh AI can mimic style" "AI can mimic emotion" "AI can mimic you and your job is almost gone, kid."

... how do i explain to you - you can make AI that does a perfect job of imitating me. you could disseminate it through the entire world and make so much money, using my works and my ideas and my everything.

and i'd still keep writing.

i don't know there's a word for it. in high school, we become aware that the way we feel about our artform is a cliche - it's like breathing. over and over, artists all feel the same thing. "i write because i need to" and "my music is how i speak" and "i make art because it's either that or i stop existing." it is such a common experience, the violence and immediacy we mean behind it is like breathing to me - comes out like a useless understatement. it's a cliche because we all feel it, not because the experience isn't actually persistent. so many of us have this ... fluttering urgency behind our ribs.

i'm not doing it for the money. for a star on the ground in some city i've never visited. i am doing it because when i was seven i started taking notebooks with me on walks. i am doing it because in second grade i wrote a poem and stood up in front of my whole class to read it out while i shook with nerves. i am doing it because i spent high school scribbling all my feelings down. i am doing it for the 16 year old me and the 18 year old me and the today-me, how we can never put the pen down. you can take me down to a subatomic layer, eviscerate me - and never find the source of it; it is of me. when i was 19 i named this blog inkskinned because i was dramatic and lonely and it felt like the only thing that was actually permanently-true about me was that this is what is inside of me, that the words come up over everything, coat everything, bloom their little twilight arias into every nook and corner and alley

"we're gonna replace you". that is okay. you think that i am writing to fill a space. that someone said JOB OPENING: Writer Needed, and i wrote to answer. you think one raindrop replaces another, and i think they're both just falling. you think art has a place, that is simply arrives on walls when it is needed, that is only ever on demand, perfect, easily requested. you see "audience spending" and "marketability" and "multi-line merch opportunity"

and i see a kid drowning. i am writing to make her a boat. i am writing because what used to be a river raft has long become a fully-rigged ship. i am writing because you can fucking rip this out of my cold dead clammy hands and i will still come back as a ghost and i will still be penning poems about it.

it isn't even love. the word we use the most i think is "passion". devotion, obsession, necessity. my favorite little fact about the magic of artists - "abracadabra" means i create as i speak. we make because it sluices out of us. because we look down and our hands are somehow already busy. because it was the first thing we knew and it is our backbone and heartbreak and everything. because we have given up well-paying jobs and a "real life" and the approval of our parents. we create because - the cliche again. it's like breathing. we create because we must.

you create because you're greedy.

#every time someones like ''AI will replace u" im like. u will have to fucking KILL ME #there is no replacement here bc i am not filling a position. i am just writing #and the writing is what i need to be doing #writeblr #this probably doesn't make sense bc its sooo frustrating i rarely speak it the way i want to #edited for the typo wrote it and then was late to a meeting lol #i love u people who mention my typos genuinely bc i don't always catch them!!!! :) it is doing me a genuine favor!!! #my friend says i should tell you ''thank you beta editors'' but i don't know what that means #i made her promise it isn't a wolf fanfiction thing. so if it IS a wolf thing she is DEAD to me (just kidding i love her) #hey PS PS PS ??? if ur reading this thinking what it's saying is ''i am financially capable of losing this'' ur reading it wrong #i write for free. i always have. i have worked 5-7 jobs at once to make ends meet. #i did not grow up with access or money. i did not grow up with connections or like some kind of excuse #i grew up and worked my fucking ASS OFF. and i STILL!!! wrote!!! on the side!!! because i didn't know how not to!!! #i do not write for money!!!! i write because i fuckken NEED TO #i could be in the fucking desert i could be in the fuckken tundra i could be in total darkness #and i would still be writing pretentious angsty poetry about it #im not in any way saying it's a good thing. i'm not in any way implying that they're NOT tryna kill us #i'm saying. you could take away our jobs and we could go hungry and we could suffer #and from that suffering (if i know us) we'd still fuckin make art. #i would LOVE to be able to make money doing this! i never have been able to. but i don't NEED to. i will find a way to make my life work #even if it means being miserable #but i will not give up this thing. for the whole world.

[poolkitty100]

does anyone else plan there mood/feelings the day before?

#Lol #I don't know what to do with my life #I need sleep

[cattnipt]

Fucked up looking dog you got there

#hello I was supposed to read svsss with a friend as a lighthearted peek into danmei #and now my entire life is ruined by these guys #I haven't finished the whole thing and I'm only on vol 3 #so if I got these two wrong my deepest apologies #I don't know what I'm doing #I'm having a lot of fun though :) #this scene was cool even though literally none of how I drew it happened #svsss #scum villain's self saving system #bingqiu #shen qingqiu #luo binghe #catt art

[lazylittledragon]

do any other artists feel like. yeah you're a 'good artist' because you draw things that look nice, but like. TECHNICALLY? you're really not great

i really hate that i can recognise that yes, my art is good, but is it VARIED? is it dynamic?? is my anatomy good? is it full of texture and colour theory? do i know how to do This? can i do That? no, not really. and that's quite painful actually

#ramble #yes this is the artist's perspective bs and yes this is anxiety because it's 1am #and yes i'm forever learning and growing but also #aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. #drawing my little guys is fun but i am not good enough for the industry right now and that fucking sucks #i really feel like if i walked into a studio with my portfolio right now they would laugh at me #one of those days where i wish i'd done a more useful degree y'know #i'm going back through the phase where i don't know what i'm going to be anymore and it's scary #some days i really want to give it up and never draw again and do something worthwhile because i Know my life would be easier #and i hate that something i love so much makes me feel so hopeless #signs that i should go to bed ^^^^ #i will resume my pity party tomorrow

[deep-space-lines]

okay but like. I just had the weirdest thought about that ‘don’t look I’m naked’ comic. Which is that that’s essentially the same thing Adam and Eve did after they ate the fruit of knowledge of good&evil. So I feel like the theological implications of that could kneecap Gabe if he doesn’t think V1 is a being with free will.

yeah ok. i dunno man. is this anything

((side note. this isn’t necessarily meant to be in-character or story-accurate or take place at any particular point in time, just a way to explore some Thoughts. i was also imagining more that V1’s words aren't actually spoken, more like Gabriel’s more articulate interpretation of whatever garbled mechanical noise V1 is using to communicate. I think an angel could do that.))

and then they fucked nasty the end

#my art #my writing #who fuckin sent this. fuck you. come off anon so i can kick your ass. (the thoughts this ask sparked consumed almost 3 days of my life) #i dont know what this even is #i just work here #disclaimer i don't come from a particularly religious background so like. #most of my knowledge of christianity comes from when my mom sent me to vbs for cheap babysitting in middle school or absorbed via osmosis #so i have no idea what im talking about except for when i do! hope this helps #i love how i say that like i expect biblical scholars to tear apart my ultrakill gay fanfiction #if you are a biblical scholar and you want to tear apart my ultrakill gay fanfiction please know i am not going to read the bible for this #ultrakill #v1 ultrakill #gabriel ultrakill #gabv1el #blood #love tagging ultrakill stuff with blood. hmm yes the floor here is made out of floor

[wormtime123]

surprise i've had another insane person AU bouncing around in my head, it’s based on martyn's lore and the gist is gem gets brought into the games as a listener agent to investigate what's up (with the limlife swap being the test run <3)

all that said:

#no idea what gem's skin's for. but i Will use it for my agenda #maybe i'll draw more for this who knows #geminitay #secret life smp #namemc spoilers #my art #also if you're wondering why i gave the listener antlers i don't know either #i do kind of like the idea of them looking different in the eyes of each player though