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#I don’t use a lot of meat when I’m left to cook by myself
iamumbra195 · 6 months
Text
Random One Piece incorrect quotes cause I'm bored
Some of these are modern au though
o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o
*Sanji's not there*
Usopp: HELP! I TOLD LUFFY I’D COOK DINNER TONIGHT BUT I CAN’T COOK!
Zoro, pouring alcohol directly into a cereal bowl:
Zoro: And you thought I could help?
...
Luffy: In my defense, I was left unsupervised.
Nami : Wasn't Zoro with you?
Zoro: In my defense, I was also left unsupervised
...
Law: I trust Mugiwara-ya.
Penguin: You think he knows what he's doing?
Law: I wouldn't go that far.
...
Sabo: Dandelions symbolize everything I want to be in life
Ace, confused: Fluffy and dead with a gust of wind?
Sabo: Unapologetic. Hard to kill. Feral, filled with sunlight, bright, beautiful in a way that the conventional and controlling hate but cannot ever fully destroy. Stubborn. Happy. Bastardous. Friends with bees. Highly disapproving of lawns. Full of wishes that will be carried far after I die.
Luffy: edible
...
Nami: We need to get through this locked door. Usopp, give me your credit card.
Usopp: Here.
Nami, pocketing it: Thanks. Luffy, kick down the door.
...
Chopper: You know those things will kill you, right?
Zoro, pouring another glass of whiskey: That’s the point.
Sanji, smoking a cigarette: We’re trying to speed up the process.
Luffy: *Nods while eating raw cookie dough*
...
Robin: Why is Luffy so sad?
Nami: He took one of those “Which Character Are You?” quizzes
Robin: And...?
Nami: He got Buggy
*Zoro cackling in the background
...
Zoro: Self care is actually getting into fights with randos in dark alleys.
Nami: No, self care is stuff like taking a bubble bath, or putting on a lot of makeup if you like it, or taking a nice warm nap!
Kin'emon, trying to be poetic: Self care is the burning heat when rage washes over you!! Self care is when you feel the bones crack under your powerful fists!! Self care is the fear in your enemies’ eyes!!!
Usopp: Lmao self care is taking Luffy's birthday meat cake just so I can eat the frosting.
Luffy: If you touch my meat cake I’ll make you eat your hands.
Sanji, losing his mind: WHY IS THERE FROSTING ON MEAT?
...
Franky, about Jinbe: Apparently we’re getting someone new in the group.
Robin: Are we stealing them?
Brook: New or used?
Franky, cackling: Wonderful responses, both of you.
...
Smoker: You’re receiving a ticket for having three people on one motorcycle.
Sanji: Shit.
Usopp: Wait, three?
Smoker: Yeah?
Nami: OH MY GOD ZORO FELL OFF!!!
...
Kin'emon: Tonight, one of you has betrayed us.
Ashura: Is it me?
Kin'emon: No, it’s not you.
Denjiro: Is it me, Kin?
Kin'emon: It’s not you either.
Kanjuro: Is it me, Kin'emon?
Kin'emon, bleeding from several debilitating injuries:
Kin'emon, mockingly: Is IT mE kiN'eMOn?
...
Usopp: Can I be frank with you guys?
Luffy, confused: Sure, but I don’t see how changing your name is gonna help.
Chopper: Can I still be Chopper?
Franky, snickering: Shh, let Frank speak.
...
Sabo: You lying, cheating, piece of shit!
Koala: Oh yeah? You’re the idiot who thinks you can get away with everything you do. WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD
Sabo: I’m leaving you, and I’M TAKING ROBIN-CHAN WITH ME
Hack, picking up the monopoly board: I think we’re gonna stop playing now.
...
Law, walking into his submarine: Hello, people who do not belong here.
Zoro: Hey.
Sanji: Hi.
Robin: Hello.
Chopper: Hey!
Law: I gave you my vivre card for emergencies only!
Luffy, grinning: We were out of meat.
...
Sanji: You know, I'm starting to regret showing you how that blender works.
Luffy, drinking meat: Why do you say that?
...
Zoro: Do you take constructive criticism?
Nami: I only take cash or credit.
...
Koala: Why are you on the floor?
Sabo: I'm depressed.
Sabo: Also I was stabbed, can you get Ivankov, please.
...
Robin: If I accidentally sat on a voodoo doll of myself, would I be trapped forever in that position, doomed to starve to death?
*everyone looks ay Karasu
Karasu: What? How am I supposed to know?
Lindbergh: You say, as if we don’t use you as a source of knowledge of the occult.
Karasu: *sighs*
Karasu: You wouldn't be trapped
...
Vivi: I love you guys, you're the best thing that's happened to me.
Nami: We're the best thing that's ever happened to you?
Vivi: Yes!
Usopp: ... I'm starting to feel a little sorry for you.
...
Usopp: WHY. why did you give Luffy a KNIFE?!
Zoro, shrugging: He said he felt unsafe.
Usopp: Now I feel unsafe!
Zoro: ... would you like a knife?
...
Dragon: What did you do with the target's body?
Sabo : What didn’t I do with the body?
Dragon:
Sabo: Okay, that sounded more sexual than I intended. I disposed of the corpse respectfully.
...
Luffy, texting Ace: Ace! Help I’m being kidnapped
Ace: Where are you?
Luffy: I’m with some strange person. In a car. Help.
Ace: I’ll call Gramps.
Garp, answering their cell: Y’ello?
Ace: Where’s Luffy? He texted me that he was being kidnapped.
Garp: Luffy? Whaddya mean, he's right next to me-
Garp, who shaved his head:
Garp: I’ll call you back. *hangs up*
Garp: THE NEW HAIRCUT ISN’T THAT BAD!
Luffy: WHO ARE YOU?!
...
*Ace, Sabo and Luffy sitting in jail together*
Sabo: So who should we call?
Ace: I’d call Gramps, but I feel safer in jail
...
Roger: Garp, my old arch enemy.
Garp: ... I thought I was your only arch enemy?
Roger: I have a life outside of you, Garp
...
Zoro: Sometimes I drink milk straight out of the container.
Luffy: The cow???
Zoro: What?
Sanji: *disgusted shudder* LUFFY, W H Y?
...
Usopp: Would you stab your best friend in the leg for 10 billion berry?
Zoro: Nami can stab me, and then when my leg gets better, we buy a big-ass house and erase my debt
Luffy: You can stab me too, then we'll have 20 billion.
Zoro: Good thinking.
...
Kin'emon: Come on, I wasn’t that drunk last night.
Denjiro: You were flirting with O'Tsuru.
Kin'emon: So what? She's my wife.
Denjiro: You asked her if she were single.
Kin'emon:
Denjiro: And then you cried when she said she wasn't
...
Marco: What time is it?
Ace: I don’t know; pass me that saxophone and we’ll find out
Ace: *Plays sax loudly and extremely out of tune*
Izou: WHO THE FUCK IS PLAYING THE SAXOPHONE AT TWO IN THE MORNING
Ace, proudly: It’s 2 am
...
Luffy: I can’t believe you live nearby, and you won’t let anyone crash at your place.
Law: You people already know too much about me.
Kidd: I know exactly three facts about you, and one of them is that you won’t let any of us crash at your place.
...
Sabo, an enabler: Tell Ace about the birds and the bees.
Luffy: They're disappearing at an alarming rate.
...
Brook: Schrödinger’s cat is overrated. If you wanna see something that’s both dead and alive you can talk to me any time of the day.
...
Zoro: With great power comes great need to take a nap. Wake me up later.
...
Law: When someone points at your black clothes and asks whose funeral it is, having a look around the room and saying 'Haven’t decided yet' is typically a good response.
Bepo: Captain, no.
...
Law: Nothing in life is free.
Chopper: Love is free!
Luffy: Adventure is free!
Robin: Knowledge is free.
Nami: Everything is free if you take it without paying.
...
Usopp: We’ve been conducting an ongoing study to see what Luffy will and will not eat.
Franky: Grass? Yes!
Usopp: Moss? Yes!!
Franky: Leaves? Ohh, yes!
Usopp: Shoelaces? Strange but true!
Franky: Worms? Sometimes!
Usopp: Rocks? Usually nah.
Franky: Twigs? Usually!
Usopp: Zoro's cooking? Inconclusive!
Chopper: How did you… test this?
Usopp: You just hand him stuff and say ‘eat this’ and if he eats it, he eats it.
Chopper: ... I don’t know how to feel about this.
Nami: IS THAT WHERE ALL MY SHOELACES WENT?
Robin: What about humans? He tried to eat Crocodile once
Everyone: ...
Usopp: I think I might be too afraid to ask
(Someone pls draw this one XD)
...
Betty: In your opinion, what’s the height of stupidity?
Koala: *turning to Sabo* How tall are you?
...
o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o
That's it, this took forever to write lol
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fearthetallman · 6 months
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Krang Pie Chapter 6
Warnings: cooking krang, eating krang alive, gore/torture
[first][previous][next]
Chapter 6
Whenever Mikey got the chance, he would slip away to his room. There were so many techniques he wanted to try.
He tried boiling. Pretty bad, took away most of the flavor. He accidentally undercooked one and bit into it only to get mush, like biting into a rotten apple. He decided not to do boiling anymore.
He dug out their old pressure cooker. Not bad, and really brought out the sweet flavor. If he added enough other things, he was sure he could add layers of flavor to the meat. But it took forever so he didn’t use it too often.
Next was the air fryer. It was a lot faster than cooking it a pan but not quite as crisp.
He really wanted to try baking it but couldn’t figure out a way to do so without being caught. So instead, he kept bringing the ingredients to his room whenever he could scurry them away.
Milk, eggs and butter were things he dared not take back, however. If he placed them down on his floor, he might forget about them until they started to smell. The last thing he wanted was others coming into his room.
The krang was as stubborn as ever, still claiming its superiority even as Mikey ripped its limbs off. Not that he could complain. It made it easier to torture him.
When Mikey started experimenting with breading, he got the real flavor to unleash. Frying them up, you could hardly differentiate them from pork chops. Although they were a bit more tender and tasted a little too sweet.
He got so wrapped up in finding the perfect seasoning to go with the breading that he didn’t notice Raph until he was already in his room.
Paprika, onion powder, and a tin of salt fell from Mikey’s arms. Raph looked up, still halfway through a piece of meat. “Oh, sorry! Something smelled so good in here I couldn’t stop myself.”
His heart thundered in his head and his eyes swung to the closet. Closed. He had put the krang away because his squirming had gotten boring. So long as it didn’t say anything, he was safe.
“You know you’re supposed to knock before coming into someone’s room,” he said, voice strangled by anxiety. He knew he should feel annoyed and angry at Raph but all he could feel was terror. He needed to get him out of here.
“Sorry, I did but you didn’t answer.” He finished off the rest and licked his fingers. “This is really good, Mikey! What’s in this?”
Mikey inched around him, back to his closet in case anything moved in there. “Just some usual stuff. Garlic salt and all that.” He laughed but it sounded forced. His hand landed on the handle of the pan.
“You usually don’t cook in your room, so I was kind of surprised. You’ve been spending so much time in here, I just wanted to check up on you.”
He internally cursed himself. He should have been more careful. “You know how Donnie gets sometimes when I’m making something new. Complains about the smell. But I’m glad you like it!” He placed the cooling pan into Raph’s giant hands. “Here, why not eat the rest of it?” He pushed the snapping turtle towards the exit.
Giving Raph the rest of it was a risk, it’d be easier for him to figure it out with more, but he couldn’t let him stay here.
“Wow, really? Thanks!” He left docilely, not fighting Mikey shoving him out until they got to the doorway. He then paused, not moving no matter how much Mikey pushed. “But I think you should try cooking in the kitchen. They’re so good even Donnie would like them!”
Michaelangelo, like all his brothers, constantly craved external validation. Though he didn’t scramble for compliments like the rest of them, he would still latch onto a compliment like a life raft. And being told that Donnie, the Extremist of the Picky Eaters Club, would like his cooking was all that Mikey needed to lose all his common sense.
***
“They’re going to find out, you know,” the krang said as Mikey gathered his cooking supplies. Even though it had grown bigger, its voice still had a bit of a pitch, making everything it said sound ridiculous.
“Just like I found you before you could complete your evil plan?”
“You stepped on me by accident,” it growled.
“Accidentally on purpose.” He walked up to the cage, glowering down at the chewed-up wad of bubblegum inside. “Does it infuriate you? Knowing I’m such an ‘inferior’ creature and yet here I am feeding you to my family.”
It slithered closer, almost wrapping its tentacles around the bar before remembering. “Do you really think they’ll still love you if they find out?”
The question startled him. It didn’t sound like a question a krang would ask. They knew nothing of nor did they care about love. So as much as the question disturbed him, he brushed it off.
“It doesn’t matter because they won’t find out.” He shoved the krang back into the closet.
***
Mikey picked something that was familiar but still used what he needed. Pork pies. He’d gotten a few more tentacles, making sure to cut off the squiggly ends so no one could tell them apart from other meat. Dicing them up even more, he started making the dough.
This was something he had missed. Baking. The warmth of the dough in his hands as he kneaded it into shape. The flour under his fingernails. (The delicious torture) Spreading the butter over the pastry to ensure it was as tasty as possible. He just hoped everyone liked it.
He made six miniature pies in a muffin tin. Raph usually ate more than one. The time ticked by slower than usual as he waited for it to bake. Watch pot and all that blah blah blah but he couldn’t help it! Everyone else was in their rooms and he couldn’t stand going back to his room where that thing was. So he sat faithfully by the oven until the full 30 minutes was up.
When he took them out, they looked delicious. The smell wafting over was intoxicating. This may have been his best work yet. He set the table and thought about knocking on everyone's door but then he remembered the group chat.
I made supper everyone!!!
He sent lots of smiling emojis, unable to contain his excitement. Two people read the message. He sat down in his chair at the table, excitedly rocking side to side as he waited for them to come out. Five minutes go by. Then ten minutes. Then half an hour. He checked his phone but there are no new messages. He turned off the screen with a sigh, laying his head on the table.
By the time an hour goes by, he had just about given up when Raph walked in.
“Oh! Hey, Mikey. Raph was going to apologize for being late but er…” Raph looked at the empty table and tried to give Mikey a reassuring smile. “You know how we all just lose track of time sometimes!”
Mikey gave a tired smile back to him, more for his effort than any comfort Raph’s words brought. Raph sits down, excitedly scarfing down his pork pie.
“This tastes amazing!”
His words reignite some excitement into Mikey and he tries some of his own creation. It had cooled off, nowhere near as warm but still tasted good, the spice mixing well with the meat. A bit too sweet, still. Something he would need to adjust for next time. While he ate, Donnie stepped out, squinting at the lights.
“Hello, gentleman. What’s for dindin tonight?”
“I made pork pies!” He said, lifting the plate of his half-eaten food.
“Oh.” Donnie’s face soured. “I am not—”
Raph slammed his fist on the table and gives a “you better not say what you were originally thinking” look. Mikey pretended like he hadn’t seen that.
“I am not a fan of pies.” Donnie continued. “Especially not of the meat kind. I’ll just find something else and then go back to my lab.” He gave a guilty smile.
Mikey’s own face fell, even when Raph offered to eat Donnie’s for him. Although he waited until evening, Leo still never came out of his room. His pie grew cold.
***
Mikey returned to his room, defeated. There was a tangle of emotions in his gut. He shouldn’t get too upset. It wasn’t his fault. It wasn’t his fault, it wasn’t his fault, it wasn’t his fault.
It was always his fault.
He grabbed his sketchbook and opened up a blank page. He picked up his pencil, but his hands were shaking so bad it slipped out of his fingers. The pencil fell and bounced on the ground, rolling under a wastebasket full of trash he hasn’t remembered to take out. He took a step forward to grab the pencil but his leg hit his skateboard. Pain radiated from his ankle and he had to suppress a swear. He kicked the skateboard but that just caused more pain and hurt and he’s so freaking stupid.
Over his heavy breathing, he heard something coming from the closet. A laugh. He stormed over and yanked open the doors. Sure enough, the krang was laughing at him. It laughed even harder when it sees his murderous glare.
“You’re just like your brother.” It said with a malicious grin. “I remember when your brother would make the same noises. He’d get so emotional, breathing so fast before he started crying. Ah, I can almost still hear it. Although he begged a lot more. I remember once he even begged me to kill him. What did I show him that time?” The krang paused, putting a tentacle to its chin. “Now I remember. I had just finished ripping off your shell in front of him. Turtles are a lot more fun than regular humans. More of a crunch.”
It laughed hysterically. Mikey wasn’t really in control. His hands just moved automatically.
It was such a satisfying crunch.
His nails dug into the squishy, wet flesh of the krang. The main body this time, reaching into a chunk of its face. It didn’t give easily, the spam-like body resisting being separated from itself. The flesh finally gave way with a wet gush, fluids dripping from the wound and strings of tendon still hanging on like the strings he’d peel off from an orange.
The creature screamed but he barely registered it, only taking the horrified expression it slowly morphed into after laughing about torturing his brother. It didn’t taste as sweet as he’d grown used to. This had more of a watered-down taste, so much gushing out that it dribbled down his chin. It was rubbery and difficult to chew but he didn’t stop, only feeling a sense of relief and release when he swallowed. His tongue ran over the sides of his mouth, catching the bitter juice that had been left behind.
“You’re a monster!” It screeched. “The krang is the epitome of perfection! You should be swearing loyalty to us, you inferior life forms. To even think of hurting us is—”
His hands tighten around the cage, his hands stinging a bit from the anti-krang still on the bars. “Shut up before I tear off another chunk of you.”
Epitome of perfection his shell. If the krang were so smart then it wouldn’t have been caught by him. The krang needed a lesson in humility and he was more than happy to be the teacher. He pulled out the kitchen knife.
“How fast can you regenerate?” Light glinted off the cared for blade, making it feel like a shiny new toy.
“No. You can’t keep doing this.” It crawled back as far as it could in the cage.
“How?” He picked up the cage and threw it against the wall, making a thud, rattling the krang inside. “Fast?”
“I can’t keep up with it. You’re taking too much!” It pleaded, sounding very pathetic.
Just what he wanted to hear. He cut off three more. He had a lot of work to do.
[next]
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harrison-abbott · 2 months
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Hopper
My father wanted to take me fishing. I’d never been fishing before and he said it was important that I learn. He picked me up from mother’s house on the Saturday morning. Mother never wanted to speak to him so whenever he came I would run out to his jeep and get inside. He smiled at me. “Hey there Hopper,” he said, which was his nickname for me. He used to call me that a lot before the whole mad breakup thing with mother, and his use of it stuck with other people – when other folks would come around to the house. Anyway, he drove me out of down and down to the woods on the way to the river. He drank quick bolts of liquor from a flask. When I was a good I always wanted that silver flask for myself; and I didn’t really understand alcohol yet. Dad wasn’t such a bad drunkard (even though he ended up dying from it). I mean, he wasn’t mean or loud or anything unless it was way at the end of the night and he would go to sleep. And he would take me to the football games with the school; come and watch me play even though I wasn’t any good, and would cheer me on anyway. That day when we went fishing it was super hot – like it was the afternoon and not nine in the morning when we got out the jeep and took the equipment down to the river. He showed me how to fit up the rods with the nylon and it all seemed intricate but he did it real skilful. “Throwing takes a whole bunch of practise,” he said, and he lanced the string into the great seething river, “but for today we’ll just wait on the bankside. And there will be some chaps in the water for sure.” I sat next to him. It took a long time, but the wait was exhilarating. He’d told me to tell him when I got a shudder on the handles. And then I got one! And I squealed. Dad laughed. “Pull it in, Hopper! Wind it up!” I tried but it was like when I would get the ball on the field; I’d wait and wait and wait, imagining the ball coming to me and me doing great things with it: but when I actually got it, I realised imagination was far different from the brutality of sport. So I reeled the winder up … and it stuttered and jolted. And then stopped: and the force on the far end of the line had gone. “Oh. I think he got away …” I looked up at father to see what he would think from his expression, and because I couldn’t read it I said, “I’m sorry Dad.” He blinked and said, “Don’t apologise for things you shouldn’t be sorry for, Hopper.” And that line has remained with me ever since he said it to me when I was a six year old boy.
He caught a trout later that day. He yanked it out of the water and killed it swiftly with a rock to the head. I thought that was sublimed to witness because I’d never seen anything murdered before aside from in cartoons. “I will gut the fish now,” Dad said, “But I must warn you that it’s quite gory. So if you don’t want to see then you can look away, Hopper.” I replied that I wouldn’t watch and so I turned my head and instead listened as he worked with the knife, and it is crazy how small volumes can make gigantic ideas in your head: especially when you are a child. I lot it would take a long while but father was finished real quick. He threw the entrails into the river and what was left was the image of a fish as you’d see in a monger. Father had brought along a pan and some oil and he made a fire and got about cooking it. He drank some more of his liquor. I can’t remember if it was whisky or rum or gin that he drank in those days because I wasn’t knowable with any of the smells. He did smoke a lot of rolled cigarettes as well, and, as with most things he did, he was fast and deft with the way he rolled them. I really didn’t like the smoke. So he always stood up and walked ten paces away when he smoked and we would call back and forth from where he was. “Is it done yet, Dad?” meaning the fish meat as it sizzled in the pan. – “Give it a bit longer on the other side, Hopper.” I turned it over with the fork. When it was done he gave most of it for me and a little bit for himself and we ate. I wished it had been me that had caught it but I felt proud to be on the team all the same. After the food we sat by the fire for a while. And of course it was weird to have a fire on such a hot day, but I liked the colours of the embers. I knew it was getting to late afternoon and that mother always wanted me home by four o’clock. And this great sadness enveloped me. I wanted to stay with Dad. Or to have him come back home and live with us again. Eventually father put out the fire with river water and we went back to the keep and then he was driving me home. And I really, really wanted it to be like the old days when he was sleeping in the room next to me, instead of the other side of town. I’d wanted to ask him a question for a long time. A query that I’d wanted to do with mother for a while as well, but had never as yet had the guts. So I blurted it out there in the jeep. I said, “Dad. Why did you and Mum split up?” His face withered, every so slightly. And he swallowed. “She was with another man, Hopper.” I’d never known this and it was quite a barrel load to take. So I said, “Does that make you sad?” And he went, “Yeah. A lot. But, that’s for me to be sad. And not you. Okay? So don’t let it bother you. And, we can go fishing again next weekend. And I’ll see you on Wednesday night for the football game, right? We’ll be good.” I said I would see him, too. When father dropped me off home he never hugged me or kissed me; what he did was give me a handshake. And I always recall how his hand dwarfed mine with my tiny fingers and palm. Then I waved to him as his jeep whizzed off into the hazy road and it was as if, whilst the jeep got smaller and smaller, this enormous mass of pain grew larger and larger in my chest. And so because I couldn’t do anything about it I ran into the house and slapped the door shut and went into my room to concentrate on something else.
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whats-ursine · 9 months
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when you get more comfortable with the structure of the game and start getting a little silly with it: dithea's official BL Traits list, taken from the character sheet doc
BACKGROUND NOTES -
Dhampir Hunger - Flesh / raw meat. Does it have to be fresh? No. But cooking it ruins it, precious D:
Dhampir Origin - Don’t. Eat. The. Bad. Meat. your brother stole from a hag coven during a famine. I think there was one of those… frost hags… and one of those death hags. And I don’t know what the third one was. Regardless, nothing but meat sustains me anymore and I can’t stay dead. Something something something, someone was modifying ghoul fever, since she was so satisfied with how lycanthropy went?
Personal Totems -
Is… am I supposed to… what? Uhh. Thing of personal importance… listen, you leave a lot behind when you go shambler for a bit. As far as constant reminders of something go, maybe the metal plate bolted to my face to keep things from flopping out? The constant dull ache to remember that this face is always gonna ping Monster to people.
Oh uhh, maybe my tools? Because it’s a reminder that, even with all the stuff I’ve been dragged into over the years, there’s, um, y’know… I’m more than just a pretty set of chompers and singing voice. HAH.
Tattoos - N/A; they don’t come back with everything else, so it’s kinda… not worth the money?
Superstitions -
Okay. So. I’ve… been around, and you know what I’ve noticed? The cosmos puts a lot of energy toward saving or redeeming certain kinds of folks. The ones who become the swirling center of a lot of drama and conflict. And very little of that energy is left for the bystanders who just got a shit deal. You gotta make waves if you want to get the universe to care about you.
Also, like, even if they don’t wanna couch it this way, celestials, for all their bits about being for the greater good, get bigger and badder the same way fiends do: eating other folks in the Astral Sea. Just because some glowy fractal gets all sanctimonious about who they want to eat doesn’t mean they won’t do what they have to to survive like the rest of us. Anyway that’s. Uhh. Not a superstition so much. I’m just sayin’, don’t put your faith blindly in higher powers, because we’re all astral worm food in the end.
Personality Traits - 
If I’m motivated to action, I do so without hesitation. After all, what’s the worst that could happen?
I’m not big on beating around the bush. I know tact, but let’s get to the fucking point already.
I love taking things apart to figure out all the moving parts. And sometimes I even know how to put them back together again after the fact!
If the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and hoping for a different result this time, then baby, I’m out of my fucking gourd
I throw myself into my work to distract the brainweasels
I like making things as much as I like breaking them
Ideals -
People shouldn’t be assholes so much, I think. I thinky-thinky-think.
And A Hard-Boiled Egg For Everyone.
Someone should yank high-and-mighty shitlords out of their lonely porcelain thrones and, if the price is right, that someone will be me
Rip And Tear And Chew And BITE BITE BITE BITE BITE
I was a battering ram in a past life, I just know it
Bonds - 
I’ve worked with a lot of people over the years, and I’ve still got a soft spot for some of them. It might be a tumor.
One of those people is Lojate Cloudstalker, a minotaur druid who I’m pretty sure has spent more time as a bear or a lion than as a featherless biped. He made this really neat necklace for me!
My family is… prone to curses like mine. I dunno why. I’m usually keeping an ear out for them, but haven’t managed to run into them in a while. I’m gonna kick my brother’s ass, but my dad could probably use a hug.
If you ever meet Nubby Stumpfingers, tell him I sent you and he’ll make room for you in one of his engineering classes. Totally worth it.
I’m trying to build some funding to figure out how to fix my condition. It’s not cheap.
Flaws - 
I miiiiiight be prone to fits of melancholy and listlessness. Don’t worry about it.
If I have to come back on my own, I go a little feral. Don’t worry about it.
I have to eat raw meat. If I don’t, I go a little feral. Don’t worry about it.
Don’t worry about it.
Stop. Worrying. About it.
I’m Fine.
Really.
Also, like, constant low-grade pain has really eroded my patience. I can be a little snappy if something’s being annoying.
Do you ever worry that the thing that makes you a monster is also the thing that makes you valuable to others? No? Lol neither do I, don't worry about it.
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Rubedo voice lines
I’ve finally figured out some Ruby voice lines aside from teapot dialogue.
General Voice Lines
Hello
Hi there! I’m Rubedo, but you can call me Ruby for short. I’m really sorry about how we first met. I’m a lot more stable now, so I hope we can be friends!
Chat: Beauty
The world outside the mountain is so colorful!
Chat: Hunger
I’m getting hungry… Can we take a short lunch break?
When It Rains
It’s like a liquid flurry! Come on, let’s play in it!
When It Snows
The cold is so refreshing.
When the Sun Is Out
I think I see a rainbow!
Good Morning
It’s a new day full of new things to learn!
Good Afternoon
Lunch time! Can I help you cook this time? I’ll be careful with the fire!
Good Evening
The stars are starting to come out. I shouldn’t stay out too much longer.
Good Night
Sorry, I can’t keep myself awake now that the sun’s gone... *yawn* Good night.
About Rubedo: Nickname
I like my nickname! Apparently there’s a gemstone that’s also called ruby, so it makes me feel…pretty.
About Rubedo: Monster
The treasure hoarders and Fatui around Dragonspine have started seeing me as some kind of spooky spirit of the mountain~
About Us: Friends
The animals seem to really like you. If you have the time, would you mind helping me feed them? Hm? Of course it’s safe!
About Us: Feast (Friendship Level 6)
I’ve been practicing my cooking in my free time! If I had known how yummy a lot of things are when cooked, I would’ve been lurking closer to the base of the mountain looking for a Pyro whopperflower to split my food with me.
About Visions (Friendship Level 4)
So, humans need a special trinket to control the elements…? But Miss Mona says she doesn’t use her Vision to control Hydro… And you don’t have a Vision, either, but I’ve seen what you can do. And what about the Archons? This is so confusing! Can humans control the elements or can’t they??
Something to Share (Friendship Level 4)
So there are Electro whopperflowers in Inazuma? I guess that makes sense. They must have the prettiest purple petals! I’d love to meet one someday!
Interesting Things
Watching my Papa and my uncle create things, I started to feel a little left out. So one day, I was playing around with my Cryo abilities without really thinking about it, and before I knew it, there was a little bird made out of snow in front of me! So yeah, I can make ice sculptures!
About Family (Friendship Level 6)
Everyone in my family is so smart! Even Klee has her bombs! I know I’m still getting acclimated to being human, but I feel like I’m falling behind…
About Nigredo: Orders (Friendship Level 4)
Papa was pretty cold to me at first, and I was content to just do what he told me and follow my instincts. Now, he feels a lot warmer. I still worry about him, though…
About Nigredo: Salvation (Friendship Level 5)
If it weren’t for my Papa, I probably would’ve been taken out by some explorers by now, with no awareness of the bigger world around me or my real potential. I’m not ashamed to say what I am, but at the same time, I feel like he saved me from being just another whopperflower.
About Albedo (Friendship Level 4)
Uncle Albedo…scared me for a little while, but I understand why he had to hurt me back then. I think he’s being extra gentle with me now as a way of apologizing for that, even though I’ve told him that I forgive him. He’s really hard on himself…
About Klee (Friendship Level 4)
I have a really conflicting reaction to Klee. Her Pyro Vision makes me feel a little sluggish, but my instinct to mimic absorbs her energy and makes me all buzzy on the inside. It’s a weird feeling, but it’s so uniquely Klee, so I don’t mind it.
About Sucrose (Friendship Level 4)
She’s so nice! Sometimes, she gets bones that still have a little too much meat on them, so she lets me clean them off for her.
About Kaeya (Friendship Level 4)
Mister Kaeya takes some getting used to. He’s pretty hard to read. I can tell there’s something he’s hiding. He likes to act like he’s fine, but I can tell he’s not. I don’t want to pry, though. Whatever’s hurting him, it doesn’t seem like he wants to talk about it.
About Diluc (Friendship Level 4)
Mister Diluc? He feels like a warm hearth fire in the middle of a bad winter storm. I don’t know why everyone says he’s mean or broody. I don’t get that impression from him. He just seems like someone who’s been through a lot and doesn’t know how to deal with it.
About Barbara (Friendship Level 4)
I like singing with her! There was this one weird guy who kept following us, but I scared him away with my shapeshifting. Barbara tells me he hasn’t bothered her since!
About Razor (Friendship Level 4)
He’s very attuned to the animals of Mondstadt, just like me. He’s been helping me make friends with the wolves.
More About Rubedo I
Hm? You have questions for me? Okay! I’ll tell you as much as I can!
More About Rubedo II (Friendship Level 3)
What did I look like before Papa found me? Like any other Cryo whopperflower, I suppose. The pink I had in my petals when I met you was from the dragon’s blood Papa used to make me what I am now.
More About Rubedo III (Friendship Level 4)
I have a lot of trouble staying awake when there’s no sunlight. I do have some energy reserves for when I go cave exploring, but I can only go for so long until I drop. I am still a plant after all. That’s something I can’t change.
More About Rubedo IV (Friendship Level 5)
Whopperflowers usually confine ourselves to one area and don’t travel much, so we don’t really know much about the world outside of our little spaces. Before I left the mountain, I had no idea there were so many things that could come in colors other than white. I’ve talked to a few Pyros who didn’t even know what snow is!
More About Rubedo V (Friendship Level 6)
I’m not always a sweet little flower, you know. The treasure hoarders and Fatui agents on the mountain have turned me into an urban legend: The Doppelgänger of Dragonspine. If I see any of them getting too close to hurting someone, I mimic one of them and act like I’m gonna eat them! Now a lot of people think I’m some sort of spirit of the mountain~ But nope! I’m just a whopperflower with some perks!
Rubedo’s Hobbies
I like singing to the animals in my spare time. Sometimes my singing and dancing attracts people, too. I don’t mind, though! I like making new friends!
Rubedo’s Troubles
I wish I could figure out a way to stay up  a little later. I only get to see the stars for a few minutes before I conk out for the night.
Favorite Food
I love meat! Especially now that know what cooked boar meat tastes like! There are so many things you can do with it, and they’re all super yummy!
Least Favorite Food
I’m mostly made up of Cryo energy, so I’m really bad at handling spicy food. It can even hurt my mouth if it’s too intense.
Birthday
Happy birthday! I didn’t know what to get you as a present, so for the whole day, I’ll help you out with whatever you need! If you don’t need help with anything, I can just keep you company. You’re always on your own. If you have a picture I can look at…I could even be your twin for the day. If that’s okay with you.
Feelings About Ascension: Intro
Whoa! So even a creature like me can do this?
Feelings About Ascension: Building up
I’ve been able to stay up a bit longer after the sun goes down. I think it’s because I’ve been spending so much time with humans.
Feelings About Ascension: Climax
Every day I feel less and less like an outsider. Being human is complicated and confusing, but I think that’s the point.
Feelings about Ascension: Conclusion
I think I get it now. To be human is to be constantly learning. About the world, about other people, even about yourself. Thank you for helping me become human.
Party Lines
Joining your party:
“Let’s go make some new friends!”
“What will you teach me today?”
“Time to play?”
Elemental Skill
Poisonous Petal
Rubedo channels his Cryo abilities in the shape of a flower to unleash a blast of cold, dealing AoE Cryo DMG
“Blooming blizzard!”
“Frozen flower!”
“Flourishing flurry!”
Elemental Burst
Mirror Mirror
Rubedo briefly destabilizes his form and calls forth several Arcane Fruits to take root in the ground and deal AoE Cryo DMG
“Time for my next meal!”
“Are you scared yet?”
“Fear the frost!”
Finding treasure:
“Ooh! So sparkly!”
“Can I eat these? Huh? I can’t?”
“How pretty!”
Light hit taken:
“That stung!”
“That wasn’t nice!”
Heavy hit taken:
“Meanie!”
“Stop it!”
Low HP:
“You’re not playing fair!”
“You’re really pushing it now!”
“You’re gonna regret this!”
Ally at low HP:
“I can take it from here!”
“I can feel you fading. Let me help!”
Fallen:
“Not again…”
“Papa… Uncle…”
“I’m sorry… I failed…again…”
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yuusaris · 1 year
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FeyFic Sequel Dump Doc - A Deadly Sort Of Sympathy [NSFW]
[Mental manipulation, worn-down-by-time brainwashing, unhealthy/toxic relationships, sexytimes]
Not back, just getting this out of my eyeballs. Very messy, very all-over-the-place. Was gunna be multi-chaptered and have plot, malik was gunna be there as a well-meaning ex that Bakura gets roped into his stupid shit, but I never got passed the intro stuff and frankly, I have other things to focus on. May return to this, but it's no longer my problem.
Lots of jumping around. Will try to clear up those jumps.
FORGOT TO TAG AS DUMP DOC. THIS IS A DUMP. NOT A FULL THING, I AM SO SORRY, I DID NOT SPECIFY. THIS IS DISCONTINUED WHILE IN PRODUCTION.
The most recent thing he remembers, if he really tries, is leaving home with Him. 
Those sharp nails rested against his wrist, guiding him through a door he didn’t recognize to somewhere he didn’t know. Only knew that He would be there. And that he would follow. 
He remembers hearing knocking, which was ridiculous because it was no one's home. He heard hinges creak and a slam which made no sense as the doorway was open already, he was halfway through it.
And just when he stepped through and left for good - he thinks he remembers hearing someone say his name.
-----
He enters the room with yawns and stretches. There is no need to wait for breakfast because they who serve Him have already brought it out. He eats simply - mostly bread and fruits, sometimes cheese. It’s the other plate, his plate, that’s graced with a full breakfast.
“Good morning, ‘Kura.”
He says this every morning and hasn't once forgotten to. He pets him gently every time, and before ‘Kura can complain about the treatment, He kisses him softly on the temple. And everything filters out but a twisted bliss at the attention, and the knowledge that this is all very, very wrong.
-----
He can’t forget the first bath he’d had here. The experience bled into weeks of scratching and howling and bleeding. 
“I don’t understand - your skin has layers too, doesn’t it?” He’d murmured while examining Bakura’s red, swollen skin. He pulled - ripped  - at what looked like a splinter but came out like a barb, as if it dug itself into his muscle, under the skin itself and latched itself to the underside. Bakura howled, tore himself away, swearing and yelling over a yelp and a flurry of ‘sorry, sorry, I’m sorry!’. Clutching his arm, feeling the blood between his fingers and the pain, the itch of all the others underneath. When he rubs or scratches it hurts. 
[Big Gap, never wrote connective tissue]
“I found out how to fix this!” He’d said triumphantly. “I did more reading about human sanitary practices and went out and got this!” With that, he’s handed a small box, and the fiendish Fey before him smiles. “It’s called ‘soap’.”
-----
 [timeskip and gap]
“You were perfectly content being fed and cuddled and played with,” He says. “You didn’t - you still haven’t even asked my name.”
Bakura stares from the bed.
Then He tells him. 
“It’s Ryou.”
------
His name is not ‘Kura. Ryou just calls him that - sometimes he’ll use the ‘Ba’ first, mostly when he - Ba-kura, making Bakura - is in trouble.
[Very large gap]
“I hadn’t eaten because of you,” Bakura growls hoarsely. When He looks away, shoulders hunching in shame, he finds a nugget of satisfaction. 
“I said I was sorry,” He murmurs. 
“Sorry?” Bakura scoffs. “That’s it? You’re sorry?”
“And it won’t happen again.”
“Oh, ya pinky-promise?”
His head tilts. “Pinky?”
[Another gap - told you I barely connected this]
Bakura wakes up to a platter of food. He must be delusional - it looks and smells like it’s actually cooked.
“You like your meat rare, right?” asks a familiar voice - He sits beside him and smiles. “I, ah, didn’t bother to do it myself this time… it was from that place we went to.” 
He just prettied it up with the platter and silverware. Whatever implication that has is tossed to the wayside in favor of eating.
It’s cooked, seasoned, and warm. Bakura could cry.
“But I also got- um,” Ryou’s fingers press together, sheepishly. “I got a book for cooking. So I can get better at it.”
Bakura slows down. He still chews, of course, but he’s trying to focus on Ryou now.
“You know, when I left you that day to come home and get your room ready, I’d - I’d felt so confident about this whole thing. I read all the books, and I got the enrichment and equipment and pet-safe furniture… but the second I couldn’t get back I was practically shedding with worry. I - hadn’t even considered what would happen if you would ever be away from me for too long.” He stops, taking a lingering look at Diabound. “And then,” a slow, fond smile crosses his face. “And then I remembered how much you knew about Diabound’s needs and I thought - ‘did ‘Kura know what to do when he was in this position’?”
“...” Bakura turns back to his food. “Snakes can go without food for up to two months - but they need water much more frequently.”
“And you were working on a time limit to get out of there,” Ryou’s voice is fond - too fond. “That’s why you did what you did.”
Bakura’s quiet.
“You’d do anything to make sure she was safe and happy and… and it took me until you were in pain to even recognize you couldn’t even clean yourself.” His hands fist in his lap. “...I’m… I’m so sorry for how I’ve been,” Ryou says softly. “I’ve been trying to make a home for you, but… knowing about Humans doesn’t mean I know enough about the differences between us.”
[Large Gap]
“But I’m a damn adult with a damn lease and a damn job to feed my damn snake,” Bakura snaps. “I did all of that on my own, and I’ll do it all a-damn-gain on my own once I’m out of your needy fffucking grip!”
He looks at him, wide eyed, mouth dropped into a small oval. Those eyes, infinite and bottomless, search him. Well, they can search all they like for whatever they like. There’s nothing pathetic about him.
“All on your own?” Ryou says, His voice slow, tinged with the soft timbre of pity as if Bakura ever needed that. “Was no one else there?” 
Bakura snarls at the hand coming to his cheek, “I”m an adult-,” but when it rests, his words stay locked behind his teeth, his breath held prisoner in his lungs. 
“Adults hunt in packs,” Ryou says. “They work and play and rear children together. What monsters let their cub suffer like that?”
Bakura doesn’t falter, won’t fall for this creatures’ act. It needs to be an act, if only for Himself. There’s only so much ignorance you can exhibit before it’s simply malice.  “I don’t need your pity-” 
He stops. His brow unfurrows at the rightmost wet streak on Ryou’s face, jaw loosening as he watches this wretched Fey tear up. 
“Did you hear yourself?” He asks. “Why do you talk about living like it’s a prize?”
“It was,” he says, through firm teeth. Nevermind his shaky memories of where he’d lived, who he’d known - he knew he had found his own path, got his own money, dug himself upwards and forwards. He didn’t succumb to the various options to fail like those around him. He’s allowed to be proud of that. “I earned it.”
The hand slides back, light nails dancing slow against his skin, resting against the flat of his neck. His thumb brushes softly beneath his ear. 
“You were always entitled to a good life. You still are.” Bakura’s doomed, the other hand comes too, cradles the opposite side and drags him forward till their foreheads touch. “And I want to give you a life you can live.”
“I can’t-” He’s breathless, searching for something, anything. A thought to cling to, a reason to disagree. “I can’t…” He drowns in the color of the earth, the smell of its dust after rain wafts from His skin. 
“Tell me everything you need,” Ryou says softly, almost too softly. Almost like He loves him. 
Bakura drops the knife. Ryou doesn’t look, as though it was never important to begin with.
“I’m hungry,” The words fall out. “I need meat. And eggs and starch and-”
“Make a list,” Ryou interrupts him. “You’ll have everything you ask for.”
“I need to-” His tongue runs dry. “I can’t clean myself-”
“Well, that’s an easy fix,” Ryou chuckles, “everything in this home is mine - everything is touched by myself, at all times. And since everything you need must remind you of me--”
No, he doesn’t understand, Bakura grips him by the shoulders, drags Him in, he needs to understand. “I can’t bathe.”
“...Ah.” Ryou realizes. “You can’t….”
And that…
“Is that… related to something else? Poor thing.” Ryou pulls him closer. Bakura follows His lead without much choice - Ryou tilts his head for him without much resistance. “You can always ask.” 
It’s a soft kiss, one that tastes like pomegranates and the smell of harvest. His hands move back across his jaw and cheek; a thumb grazes the bottom of his bottom lip. Bakura feels all of it, his focus divided between ten fingers, each individual fingertip drawing a unique path along his neck, down his chest, and he’s compelled - there no other word for it - to bring Him closer, kiss Him deeper, slip his own tongue across His lip and hear him gasp and sigh like a nymph.
“I had fun last time,” Ryou speaks softly, but not quiet. Hypnotic, it beckons him to trail his mouth down Ryou’s neck. “Did you?” Bakura nods. “You asked me then to be my only pet - do you remember?”
Bakura mumbles an excuse against His warm collarbone, “that was playful banter.”
“There was some truth to it,” Ryou’s hands slip into his hair. Soft strokes and little massages with his fingertips lull him closer, coax his hands to find His skin. “You said ‘if you treat them all like’ -” He’s cut off by His own little moan, muffled by tightly-pursed lips - He’s enjoying this, Bakura can feel that fact against his thigh. “I haven’t filled my end of that bargain.” 
The hand in his hair tightens. 
Bakura’s head is pulled back again, examined under His eye. “Do you want me to?” Bakura tries to nod - can’t, with the hand in his hair. Ryou ignores any silent pleas, His eyes boring into Bakura’s. “Say it.”
“Yes.” It falls from him, pulled by sheer presence. He feels weak. His hair is pulled again and his spine shakes.
“Did you like that?”
“Mm-hm.” No answer, no change - will He truly only accept words? “Yes?”
“Good pet.” A hum. A kiss to his chin. “You have a nasty habit of hiding what you mean - it makes things difficult sometimes.”
[For Sale. Large Gap. never connected.]
I want you to tell me what you need,” Ryou says. “Clearly. Without me needing to guess or push you.” When Bakura shakes his head, he’s taken firmly by Ryou’s hand and forced to stop - he’s surprised at the strength in Ryou’s grip. “Don’t disagree with me on this. You need to learn to ask me for what you need, I can only give you what you ask for. Stop making me force your hand.” Then, quieter, into his ear, “not everything you deserve needs to be won.”
There’s an ache in his chest - the spot where his heart would be, if he had one - alongside the ache in his dick, a swollen need from torment that can only be pleasure. Bakura growls at it, at the implications it brings.
“You’re just as strong when you ask for me,” Ryou smiles against his ear. “I think you’re stronger when you can be honest.”
Despite himself, Bakura’s breath turns ragged.
“And you’re very attractive when you want this badly,” His voice is thick, playful, “very sexy.”
And he tries, he really tries, not to lose himself in the tongue running along his ear, the long rubbing up and down his chest to sternum to belly and up and down and up again. But he can hear the cusp on which his wantonness stands. He’s sure Ryou can too.
“And if you told me, right now, that you want me to have control--”
And he does want it, wants it more and more He talks and offers, mouth dropping open when His palm presses down on his cock, once, then moves to the side to rub circles into his thigh.
“--I think it’d be cruel to call that weak. I think it’s brave.” He says with a kiss.
[Last Gap, I swear.]
The one thing He wouldn’t do is degrade. Bakura couldn’t explain the difference for various reasons.
“It just sounds like a nasty form of teasing.” And Bakura nods, frantically - yes, it’s teasing, yes it’s nasty, yes he wants- “I don’t want to talk to you like that,” Ryou said. “I want you to enjoy being good for me.” 
Bakura grits his teeth, against the derision at his wants and the cock sliding over, not in, his ass. Over and over, truly teased, no relief.
“I like that you couldn’t wait,” Ryou says again. His cock twitches and he grunts as His hand picks up again. “You’ve been so lonely, haven’t you?” He nods, rocking into His hand. All this from months untouched - he might go mad. “Tell me what you want,” Ryou speaks slowly. “Tell me what you want me to do for you.”
Confessions and fantasies spill from his mouth like drool, and he’s granted them in turn - cock gripped too tightly to cum, ass up and rutting against His hips for relief. More than he ever has from insult or shame, he cums from His praise for Bakura’s debauched and slutty -- no, from his eager, willing pleasure, words of worship for opening his chest, laying himself bare, showing everything and giving it all away.
“Good boy, ‘Kura,” Ryou purrs against his temple. With a kiss, ‘Kura’s consumed again by that ache, and instead of bracing himself against that salacious venom, he lets it spread across his nerves and limbs all the way to his head. “Good pet.” 
-----
Ryou hums while he reads. His fingers card through ‘Kura’s hair. Each gentle tug pulls it loose from behind his ear, or across the part, spilling the strands across His lap.
About the third time it falls out of place, ‘Kura grumbles, irritated at the feelings of ‘unright’ left in it’s place. Ryou chuckles softly, watching ‘Kura shake his hair back into place.
“Sorry,” Ryou smiles. “It’s just so soft now.”
‘Kura groans.
-----
His name is ‘Kura. Sometimes there’s a ‘Ba’ first, but only when he gets in trouble.
He doesn’t get in trouble.
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lorddarkkitty · 1 year
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Alright it been a couple of days. I’m tired like a bitch but there nothing I can do. For some reason last night I when to sleep around 3:37am cause I wasn’t tired and woke up at 8am oddly and suspiciously enough also not feeling tired. I guess after work it would hit me. I had like two sandwiches after I got home. I order volume 5 and 6 of The Witch and the Beast manga. I’m so excited I love this series. I also need to read the manga Witch Hat Atelier. I got it the same time I did the Witch and the Beast Manga but I haven’t read it yet. Mostly cause I haven’t gotten a chance and I’m more preoccupied with The Witch and the Beast manga. I also need to finish reading the Hobbit I started maybe 2 or 3 months ago. It not that I’m a slow reader. I used to consum books when I was younger I just get distracted a lot now with tv or my own daydreams and music and time just flies. It not boring I watch the movies but I do have a hard time just sitting down and reading it but I’m almost done with it too . I’ll make time tomorrow to finish it so I can start the lord of the rings books too. I have so many books I need to read. I also have to re organized my bookshelf.
Also how come when I want to start a new paragraph, instead of making a small space I get this gigantic gap?????? I’m on mobile but that so weird.
But if I do it again the gap isnt that big wtf ??!???
Anywho I’m about to start silent hill 2 up and see how far I get I will update that. I also got pulse oximeter. It used to read ur oxygen level but I use it to get my bpm cause sometimes I wale up very aware of my heart beat and I can feel it. So I use to to determine if I’m having an anxiety attack even tho. The anxiety doesn’t set in till I see that my bpm is like 106. My resting heart rate is like 76. But I want to use it kinda while playing my game to see if it increases or not. I think that be fun. After that I may start up Skyrim. I also have dark souls remastered but I feel like I need to look up a video kinda to watch to see the mechanics and get tips on playing. I can’t remember if it hard or not.
Another biggish gap hmmmm. Tho in like and 1hr and 30 min I have to cook again. Yesterday I got the stuff to make negimaki but it didn’t turn out that way. Like it came out taking great when I cooked it I just didn’t have the energy anymore to continue with it. I also think I didn’t cut the beef flank right so I don’t think I could have rolled the scallions in it to cook. But I was already standing for like 2 and half hrs I was hurting. So I kinda just cooked it in a big pan with the sauce but I have left over meat I didn’t cook. I have to make more rice today but that takes 50 minutes in the rice cooker. It makes me wonder about killer from one piece and how one of his hobbies is cooking. Like how? Cooking takes so much effort and energy and I feel no enjoyment. (Is it suppose to be stealing my energy? )Just my inner rage especially when it not coming out like how I want it too. And he cooks for like so many ppl I get tired cooking for just myself. Sometimes I won’t even eat if I have to cook something. And like Eustass has like 5 fucking stomachs. I would love to eat Killer’s cooking.
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fictionkinfessions · 1 year
Note
Ayano Aishi here.
My dear mother Ryoba taught a lot of things that helped keep me from stumbling and falling trying to keep my senpai safe from the other women in the school. It wasn’t until a long time later that I’d learn how to utilize those, but once I did, the skills she taught came in handy. Like using the right chemicals to clean up blood, or, also done during a mother-daughter cooking session, having me stab/cut through thick cuts of meat so I’d know how to break skin and muscle.
Obviously, none of this was good, and in source I really was a monster, torturing and killing innocents for a selfish goal. Yet I still look back on these events fondly. I always did know and to this day do truly believe that Ryoba loved me wholeheartedly, even if it was in a sort of twisted way. I suppose even if I was a monster, and my mother was too, she never treated me as such. She was kind, and she wanted what she believed was best for me and going to make me happy. And in the end, I suppose it did.
I don’t believe my mother is to blame for the person I became as I grew. I was not a good person. I don’t think my upbringing made me that way. I truly think my mother saw that I was like her, and showed me what she thought I needed to be successful. I’m not lying to myself, we weren’t good people. But she was a good mother, and she showed me a lot of love. I truly believe her influences on me were not negative. At least, they were as positive as a murderer lovingly teaching her heartless and emotionally cold daughter how to be a murderer could be.
When she and my father left not to long before I started at Akademi, I felt a bit strange. Not really sad or lonely, I never really cared about anyone, but I felt more numb than I usually did. At least I knew how to cook and care for myself thanks to her lessons.
I will admit I miss her.
-Ayano Aishi
'
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Personal dump below
Cw for health issues, fatphobia, ed
I never talked about this to anyone openly and I don’t feel like anyone I have in my life rn would understand it, and I think writing this down may help me cope with it
As you all know, I am autistic and I have food issues that just… it’s bad. Actually when I first read about arfid, I felt for the first time like I was not the only defective human made like this. I’m not sure if what I have is arfid, because I’m 99% it’s an effect of my sensory issues, and idk if it enters the criteria or not. But naming aside, I have a hard time when it comes to food because most of it looks or smells disgusting to me, or just gives me a bad reaction. Used to gag and even throw up just from being forced to sit at a dinner table. I didn’t get an autism diagnosis until a couple years ago so growing up, I got a lot of shit from about everyone I know. No one really gets it, and I didn’t get it either, so I used to believe I deserved it. I will probably forever be unable to look at the faces of some people and not remember the stuff they said to me, or about me, or about my parents who didn’t force me to eat
Really, this is a huge deal for me. It’s a big part of who I am, a part I hated so much for so long and never could change, and that I want to learn to accept. I know now that there’s probably something about my body or my brain that makes stuff not feel the same way as most people and thinking like this makes it feel silly that it was such a big trouble but I used to avoid going to parties and stuff, it together with other stuff made my parents not let me visit my friends and stuff as a kid, and I already have other issues when it comes to creating relationships and it didn’t help at all. I used to believe I could never get married because any husband would want me to cook for him (loool) and that I shouldn’t have children because I couldn’t teach them how to eat healthly, and that I could not pursue my dreams of living abroad because I would be unable to find anything to eat there (I can happily say I got to spend a year in my dream land, and yes, eating was an issue but no, I didn’t starve to death there)
But things can’t be as simple as just me having to learn to accept myself as I am. No. You see, I can only eat a few types of food, mostly breakfast food. Cheese, bread. I eat so many variations of cheese and bread. No meat. No greens. Not much fruit, but then there are other factors here as I can eat some, I just end up not eating much. Whatever you know of Brazilian cuisine is probably a nope for me, which is what makes so many parties very unpleasant for me. I know I don’t eat healthly. Adults told me all the time when I was younger, in an attempt to make me change how I eat. I have never been thin and PE was a nightmare. But as a kid, magically I never had any big health issues. I passed all my blood tests. Doctors hated me /jk
Now that I’m adult things started catching up. This last couple of years studying from home didn’t help, as I stoped walking longer distances than from my bed to the couch. It’s not as bad as it could be, I know, I could be deficient in so many nutrients. I haven’t even had a kidney stone in years. But it scares me. Because the still minor, but unlikely to go away on their own, issues I’m having are all usually related to being overweight, I’m sure my doctor will tell me to diet and exercise and lose weight. I can exercise, I hate it but I can do it, but changing my diet is much more difficult, I just can’t eat a lot of stuff that would be good for me, and because I don’t have many options left I can’t stop eating some stuff that is bed for me. I’m mentally preparing to say it to her because I want her to give me all the options I have, and I don’t want any more thinking that something I didn’t choose and can’t change is my fault, laziness, or me being spoiled, or all those other things I grew up hearing
But what if I’m wrong? What if I can change, and I just read some pieces online and clung to the idea that I can’t because it’s easier? I can’t stop thinking about it, doubting myself
And none of it is the worst. I’m no expert on anything but I think my personal relationship with food entered a new, terrifying chapter. I mentioned living abroad, right? That was my first time away from my parents, who despite their flaws haven’t pressured me into changing for years. I wasn’t fluent in the language, so at first I tagged along some girls from my dorm, and predictably they didn’t understand this stuff and I didn’t understand it enough to explain myself and so every day it was like. They picked a restaurant. There was nothing I ate there. I said I was fine, drank something, bought some snacks somewhere. After a week I was feeling dizzy and realized that couldn’t go on. I managed to prioritize my well being after that but it set a terrible precedent. Once in a while I would buy something new to try and if I couldn’t eat it, I just gave up and stayed hungry. Or I skipped meals because I wanted to save money, or because executive disfunction didn’t let me leave my bed, or I didn’t find anything I could eat. I lost a lot of weight, I have never been thinner (though that was partially due to having no car and walking/taking trains everywhere, which is a good thing that I miss). And I don’t think I was any healthier, because I ate sweets for lunch and bought as sort of snacks as rewards to myself. I think I ate worse, but less and did exercise, and just one of these is a good thing.
Skipping meals has become a thing I go back to sometimes since then. Since I live with my parents, my mother seems to have noticed, so she makes sure to ask me what I ate, or even leave food ready for me. I have lied before. Or not corrected her when she assumes I ate. Last week she jokingly asked to see a picture. I have also pretended to be sick to skip meals. I’m not sure why all this. Sometimes it’s executive disfunction I guess. I do eat more when she leaves stuff ready for me than when I have to prepare it myself. Sometimes nothing seems good. I have had body image issues at some points of my life, of course, and I would be lying if I said I am happy about my body rn (it bothers me a lot when clothes don’t fit anymore) but I don’t think a lot about my appearance because. You know it’s not like I look at myself often. My relationship with my appearance *is* another can of worms, so I just try not to think about it. And tbh sometimes I eat stuff that I don’t even like, but that I’m glad that is at least edible (compared to most things) so I just suck it up and eat. My “yes” list is very small and my “nope” list is huge, so when something falls on “maybe” I treat it like a yes. But I don’t like the stuff, and I think sometimes I want to avoid eating it so I don’t eat anything. I still didn’t figure out if I may be doing it sometimes to hurt myself somehow.
I’m afraid of getting worse because I found out the issue in the exam I did today, and I felt guilty about eating anything after learning it
I’m afraid of doing nothing and those health issues getting worse, and I’m afraid of taking the wrong approach and ending up with some eating disorder. I am afraid into turning this into something about being fat or thin and mixing it with the issues I already have with my appearance. I am afraid of the fact that I can’t eat healthly, I may be able to do better than what I’m doing but I don’t think it will ever be good, and I hate it so much that I’m afraid it will turn into me hating myself (more than I usually do for other reasons). I am currently treating my depression and I am doing better than when I started but I am afraid of all this shit sending me into a downward spiral. I have had days in which I thought about suicide, it never escalated to more than just thoughts, but even just that is something I don’t want to face again
Wow, that’s a lot. If anyone read it so far, thank you for your time and care. Don’t feel obligated to reach out to me. I wrote this as a way of figuring my own feelings and to try and make it easier to bring my concerns to my doctor, my therapist, and maybe my mother. Like I said I am treating my depression and rationally I know that even if it gets worse, there’s no reason to believe we can’t make it better again. Also, my parents, and everyone really, even those who used to say mean stuff to and about me, everyone is much more supportive now that I have an autism diagnosis. They didn’t know any better when they said those things, and neither did I. Yes, it still hurt, it still does hurt, but I sincerely believe their views on me changed with the diagnosis and that they realized things they didn’t know. And with the knowledge I have now, I can educate them on it too. You know, I used to be so ashamed of touching this subject and look at me now, posting on my blog. I can make jokes about my restricted diet and my sensory issues and it doesn’t hurt anymore because I know that I am not a defective human.
(This last paragraph was so important to write. To remind me that no matter how scared I am, I am not alone and I am not helpless. I think I am doing well in learning the therapy mindset 🧐)
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blog-reflection · 3 months
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ONE / ELEVEN - A Genius Plan
Soo, where do I begin?
I decided to go up in my room and grab things I need for like about one, maybe two weeks. I took Henry, chargers but also clothes as well as my plushie bee I just called Majesty. I’ve thrown the loaded back down the stairs and almost threw myself with it. Once down, I grabbed and saved anything I could from the fridge. Luckily, unlike my bag, it wasn’t loaded. I checked every room before throwing on that new jacket and getting out of the house via the garage to get my bike. It was a black bike with white feels and a basket in front of the handlebar which was decorated with fake flowers. I threw the bag on the back of my bike and semi secured it with some string I found in the garage. I put my bag as well as a small music box in the basket and made sure Majesty will be secured as well, I really don’t want to miss out on her. I exited the home and turned left. During the ride I listened to a lot of music and just enjoyed the ride. Yes it was fall, yes it could have been warmer and yes it lowkey socket but it was also lowkey nice. It took me around 40 minutes to get to Shepherdswell but damn was I happy to be here. Back in the days I was driving to my grandparents all summer. They took me to the beach, to the city and sometimes even to London. It was a nice time. I placed my bike in the gateway and went to the door to knock, a couple of seconds later, my granny opened the door.
Thea: William? James: Hi Granny.
The entire ride I was thinking about how to tell them, how to say hi, but now? It all came out so naturally. I stepped closer to Thea and gave her a big hug.
Thea: James? Why are you here? Why is your bike so full of stuff? James: Oh can’t I just visit you? I wanted to surprise you.
I made sure to come across nice and innocent, but I haven even a bigger one for them. Thea went inside and I went to my bike to grab my bags. I put my bike next to the door and went inside. I let loose of the big bag in the hallway and walked into the kitchen so I could store the food in it.
James: Hey Granny, where’s Joe? Josepphe: I’m right here boy.
I looked around and noticed my grand dad standing in the door frame.
Josepphe: James what are you doing? James: Oh I just wanted to come around, you know, do some surprise cooking. Josepphe: Let me guess, beef with your mum? James: What? No, I really just wanted to give my two favourite old people a visit. Is that so hard to believe? Josepphe: Alright alright, then what meal are you doing? James: Depending, do you have rice?
Both of us started laughing really loud, even Thea joined in. It was a nice time. We all ate Lunch and then played some games, mostly card games, till the moon started rising. We cleaned it all up and then started to prepare dinner all together. Josepphe cut some veggies, Thea prepared the meat and I took care of the sauce. It’s all like it used to be when I was little. I am even sitting on the counter. Once everything was done I started to get the table ready and tried to decorate it a bit. I wandered through the living room looking for candles and a small candelabra. After a couple of seconds I spotted one right on the shelf. I carefully grabbed it and placed it in the middle of the desk. I also went outside to get some, more or less pretty flowers. The table looked pretty, I mean it. It had a lot of cottage living vibes while also looking sort of elegant, but that’s mainly due to the candelabra. We again, ate our meals and finished off with some wine and a tesco dessert. It’s been great. 
I headed to my old room for the night, it wasn’t prepared so I had to do that first. It was then when I realised that I haven’t looked at my phone since I arrived. I grabbed it from the floor, since it fell out of my pocket and turned it on. Spotify was still open, streaming a variety of songs from a shuffled mix I don’t know. The battery was almost dead, leaving me with 15% charge and docent messages from Jesse. FUCK. I WAS SUPPOSED TO MESSAGE JESSE ONCE I ARRIVED. I Ignored their messages and started calling them.
Jesse: You are such a mess sometimes. James: Hi yeah… I ehm...I might have forgotten. I’m sorry. Jesse: All fine, at least now I know you haven’t been murdered during the ride by a random dude with an axe. James: You, my friend, are watching too many movies. Jesse: I am an adult I can watch movies whenever I want to! Also, you never know. James: Okay topic change, it worked! I’m currently at my grandparents and no one is sus.  Jesse: Well, you are a pretty good liar I have to say. Not sure if that’s a good thing but in that case, well done! What’s your plan now? James: Weeelll I am not so sure. I brought Henry with me so maybe just browse until I find some apartments that I could visit.  Jesse: THAT’S IT!!! James: “THAT IS WHAT”? Jesse: Suggest a trip to Brighton for a week with them, it’s a gift from me. How about that? James: You are brilliant! That is a genius plan! Taking them to Brighton saves so much time not gonna lie! Jesse: So tell me everything, I got time now….
Jesse and I were talking for what felt like hours. I told them everything that happened at home, they updated me on their life. Apparently Jesse is getting close with a girl they know from their course. I don’t think they mean it in a romantic way though, otherwise they wouldn’t have told me. As open as we are Jesse never talks about who they date. I could be a dick and just look up the classes on Henry but..well who am I kidding. I booted up Henry and browsed through the Royal Holloway classes of Jesse's year. Usually the classes for Video Games Arts and Design are always loaded but that year was rather chill. There are only 48 out of 60
People in the courses, probably less knowing a lot of people don’t even attend lectures. Let's see…. We have 4 people that did not fill in any gender so I assume they are somewhere under the non-binary umbrella, so Jesse will love it there. The rest are split into 29 girls and 27 boys. But all in all they seem like a nice class so whoever the lucky one is to be friends with my best friend, she must be cool then! I browsed a bit through some pages of B&Bs to stay until I finally fell asleep. 
I got woken up by the smell of coffee and bacon with a small note of pancakes. I put on my shirt and ran down into the kitchen. Unlike last time there wasn’t much. Just a typical English breakfast. But that is great too! I took some pancakes and beans and ate rather fast. I found an awesome B&B and I really wanted to tell them. That’s when Joe spoke up.
Josepphe: James? What would you say to a trip? Just for a week. Your work must be pretty hard and I assume you haven’t had a proper vacation for now. James: You are right, there was no vacation. What are you planning on? Josepphe: Well, since you look for apartments in Brighton I thought we could go there? We could visit the beach or go shopping in between the apartments. What do you say? James: That’s amazing! I actually already looked around, I kinda wanted to surprise you but well works that way too haha Josepphe: Alright big boy, get your stuff, we will meet in two hours so we can get there by train, I’ll get us a taxi! James: Alright!
It didn’t take long to get everything ready since I haven’t even unboxed my bag. I changed into more appropriate clothes then a long shirt and boxer shorts and made my way downstairs. Josepphe and Thea were waiting in the living room, yet there was only one bag. Joe said granny can’t get with us because of her walking issue, which is fair. We waited another ten minutes outside before the taxi arrived. We hugged Thea goodbye and placed ourselves in the taxi which drove us right in front of the Dover main station. We went through the gates and on the train.
I can’t wait to be in Brighton
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eazy-group · 8 months
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Lydia lost 75 pounds
New Post has been published on https://eazydiet.net/lydia-lost-75-pounds/
Lydia lost 75 pounds
Transformation of the Day: Lydia lost 75 pounds by changing her lifestyle and embracing healthy habits. While traveling overseas to teach, she learned to create more of a work/life balance. She also discovered the mix of nutrition and outdoor fitness that works for her.
Social Media: Instagram and Threads: @live_love_lydia TikTok: @72sunflower 
What was your motivation? What inspired you to keep going, even when you wanted to give up?  My reason was solidified once I left the US to teach overseas in 2017. It is something crazy when you are traveling in other countries and see that you are usually the biggest one in the crowd. I started looking at people from different cultures and the work/life balance they created for themselves when I moved to Qatar in 2019. 
My school is huge on well-being. I was like, “How can you teach this to kids if you aren’t practicing it yourself?” What keeps me going is that my primary focus is improving my overall quality of life, not weight loss. So in everything I do, I’m focused on how this will improve my quality of life (mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually). 
How did you change your eating habits?  In January 2021, I had Covid. While in quarantine, I started listening to audiobooks. I went down a nutrition rabbit hole, and it finally all made sense. I stopped eating out a lot when I left Kuwait (2017-2019) and started cooking my meals. I don’t believe in eliminating items unless there is a medical reason. 
I started focusing on whole foods. I don’t care for meat like that, so if I have something, it’s seafood (maybe chicken here or there). I did cut out dairy due to inflammation in my body. 
I was in chronic pain due to an injury to my left foot during the fall of 2018. I started physiotherapy in 2020, and medication I didn’t want to take forever for inflammation. I noticed an immediate improvement when I stopped dairy and was able to stop taking the anti-inflammatory meds. (2022 was physiotherapy and shockwave therapy from the end of January until I finally had surgery on 12.19.2022 …9 days after my 50th birthday)
What is your workout routine?  I’m not a fan of gyms. Qatar is all about physical activity. Sports Day is a national holiday. They encourage everyone to be active. So I bought a bike. I cycle, do stairs at the amphitheater, walk, and now jog (since fully recovering from surgery. I also jump rope. In June, I started doing Muay Thai training (martial arts), which includes HIIT circuit training during the last half of the class. 
How often did you work out?  I’m an everyday person as I believe in being active. However, my intensity is never the same day after day. Active rest days are brisk walks or easy bike rides just to be and unwind from my work day. 
What is your height? 5’3″ and a strong half 
When did you start your journey? How long did your transformation take? In 2010, I reached my highest weight: 304 pounds. In August 2019, when arriving in Qatar to teach, I weighed 270 pounds. This is when I started truly focusing on myself and my health. It was slow due to physical challenges. Then, throw in Covid. So, from August 2019 to July 2023- I’ve released 70–75 pounds.
Is weight loss surgery part of your journey? No surgery here other than the one that was on my foot that gave me a new lease on life. 
What is the biggest lesson you’ve learned so far? In all things regarding your health and well-being, be intentional. This lifestyle does not happen by accident. 
What advice do you have for women who want to lose weight?
1) Learn to set aside time for you daily for your physical/mental well-being. Start with 30 uninterrupted minutes. We give so much of ourselves to our families, jobs, cats, and dogs …but we seem to go last. Stop that! It doesn’t mean going hard for 30 mins. It may be a 15 min walk and 15 mins meditation. 
2) be intentional about what you need to do. Work on discipline. Motivation is a fleeting emotion. Discipline gets it done. If we are disciplined enough to show up for work when we don’t feel like it, we can be disciplined enough to show up for ourselves. 
3) Take time to find food and activities that you enjoy. There are no quick fixes. Think sustainability. You aren’t going to continue anything you do not enjoy.
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transformerslolz · 11 months
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The Life {and Death} of Abigail Parker, Chapter 22
By the time I woke up the next morning, the base was basically empty of bodies. Wheeljack was probably in his lab cooking up something dangerous, Cliffjumper was scheduled for patrol outside. According to a message on my TV, Bumblebee and Sam were on their way, so I wouldn’t be as alone as I thought.
Luckily for them, they were at Sam’s parent’s when the Decepticons had attacked. They managed to miss all of the action.
It was easy to complete the tasks Ratchet set out for me when I had no distractions. Wheeljack showed me how to play music from the medbay console, so I was blasting some of my favorite pop songs as I worked. Ratchet would simply offline if he knew the music I was playing. He wasn’t a pop guy.
I decided to work through a lunch break to give myself more free time once all my work was done. I was done by mid-afternoon. Cliffjumper was back from his patrol by then.
“Find anything interesting?”
“Only if you’re a game hunter, which I doubt you are,” he told me, shaking his head. “Lot of moose. Meece? Many mooses. However you say it.”
I laughed. “I eat meat, but the kind you buy at the grocery store, not the kind you have to kill yourself. I understand the sentiment of it, but I don’t understand hunting for sport.”
“It does seem to be a wasteful practice, trophy hunting,” Cliffjumper mused. “Moose are bigger than I thought.”
“They’re huge,” I agreed. “It’s a wonder why we didn’t domesticate them instead of horses. Horses are probably a lot easier to tame than moose, though.”
Small talk like this came fairly easily with Cliffjumper. It was a pleasant surprise- I couldn’t expect everyone at base to generally enjoy my company, that would just feel weird, but they for the most part did enjoy my company in one way or another. Thanks, Past Me, for making good impressions.
“Are there any Cybertronian animals or creatures that resemble Earth creatures?”
That really got him going. As I had suspected, there were different species and types of creautres on Cybertron that were similar to the organic ones on Earth, but there were fewer of them than here on Earth.
I could feel my body cringe when Cliffjumper explained how he used to be a sort of trophy hunter before the Great War. Of course he was, after I basically talked shit about it here on Earth.
“It’s a lot easier done with an electromagnetic-pulse generator than with a gun, and a lot less messy. And less death. Phasers are set to stun, y’know. Still had to aim just right, or it wouldn’t have any effect and they’d get away.”
“You guys had all that shit figured out, huh? No need for killing just because-” I stopped myself when I could hear what I was saying. “I mean-” I stammered.
“I know what you mean, I’m not as sensitive about it as I used to be. Those days will come again. I still have hope.”
Cliffjumper wasn’t so bad. I was at least grateful the twins weren’t the two that stayed- that would have been a living nightmare. Sunstreaker still hadn’t spoken to me since his outburst. Sideswipe had made some small talk, but there was less of it since the incident.
Hopefully they were getting whatever it was out of their systems.
I was pondering the meaning of life that evening in the Dungeon when I got word from Wheeljack. Sam and Bee had arrived. Population three had turned into population five. I decided that the meaning of life could wait for at least one more night.
“Sammy!” I exclaimed. “Finally, another human-human!”
“Human-human?” Sam laughed. He had almost fallen to the floor when I jumped him. “You mean- Oh, holoforms, right.”
“Bumblebee,” Cliffjumper greeted the fellow minibot. “How was it on the way here?”
“Rough, but manageable.”
“When did you get your voice box fixed?” The last I knew, Ratchet was too busy with other things than to finally fix Bumblebee’s damaged voice box. He could speak in his holoform, but not so much through his real form.
Until now, I guess.
“Ratchet fixed me up before Sam and I left, like right before,” Bumblebee told me. His real voice was ever so slightly lower than his holoform’s. “I must’ve forgotten to tell you. My bad.”
“Hey, don’t worry about it,” I said, shaking my head. “I’m just happy for you!”
In reality, I hadn’t had much time with Sam and Bumblebee, not much time that I remembered. Sam was still in college, so he was away from the Autobot base most of the year. Bumblebee was his guardian, and followed where he went unless he was needed by the team. That was why they were here now- Bumblebee would be backup, along with Cliffjumper and Wheeljack, as a last resort if things went south.
That was how I’d know they were in trouble. As long as the three of them were on base still, they were in the clear. I could breathe.
“What’s on the activities list, cruise director?” Sam asked me.
I was never so excited to cook for another person. I even made dessert and appetizers. For the most part, I found myself making big meals and just having a lot of leftovers instead of cooking for myself every day. Cooking for one person was almost worse than cooking for multiple. You can only divide a recipe so many times.
“So how’s it going with you and Jazz?”
“That’s one way to have a dinner conversation,” I stated, squinting at him from across the table. “No ‘Wow, Abby, this looks delicious’?”
Sam cleared his throat. “My bad. Wow, Abby, this looks delicious! How is it going though, seriously?”
I stabbed my fork into my mashed potatoes. “Thanks, Sam. We’re doing good, I think. It’s kind of weird to know so little about him, and to have him know so much about me. As much as we try to ignore Past Me, it always seems to come up.” I sighed. “At this point, living so far away from civilization is doing more damage than the memory loss. There’s not a whole lot for me to do here besides sit around.”
“No parties?”
“Maybe I’ll plan a welcome back party,” I hummed. “Have to do it all by myself, though, since Blue’s gone. He helped me with the last one.”
“Oh, man, I remember this one party you guys threw-”
I listened intently to Sam’s story. It was about a party I had thrown in the first year of knowing the Autobots. It might have been the first one, but Sam didn’t remember. It had been such a long time since the bots had partied like that, many of them apparently forgot that their high grade tolerance would be low. They rarely used it.
So most of them got really overcharged. That was what Sam called it. It sounded like a term I had looked up in Ratchet’s database, basically meaning their version of drunk.
“We might not have all the supplies to throw something like that,” I said thoughtfully. “I’m kind of Ratchet’s assistant now, and First Aid’s as well. Even while they’re gone, Ratchet has me doing chores every day around the medbay.”
“Do you like it?” Sam asked.
I shrugged. “Gives me something to do, and I at least feel like I’m helping. Throwing parties can only be so beneficial in a war.”
Sam rolled his eyes. “Optimus will carry on and on about how this war isn’t our burden to bear. You believed it for the longest time.”
He said that in the past tense. Did I not believe it now?
They had all said something to that effect. Jazz and Prowl were insistent that I had no blame in recent events. Were they trying to convince me, too?
“What do you believe, Sam?” I asked him.
Sam cleared his throat. “Well, it changes a lot, but I basically believe that while this is not our war, we can help if we want to. Knowing that if we help, it makes us targets for the Decepticons and whatever other enemies are out there.”
“You think they have other enemies out there besides the Decepticons?”
“God, I hope not, but it’s possible,” he replied.
The thought of more alien civilizations sent a chill through my spine. I wasn’t so ignorant as to think we were the only ones out there, obviously not. But one known alien race is one thing. There were probably many planets out there sustaining life of some kind. The Cybertronians were so technologically advanced, they figured out space travel and portal technology. There were likely more civilizations out there that just didn’t have the technology or means to travel outside of their planet.
It was unsettling to think about.
“So, Bumblebee mentioned to me something about a dungeon here?”
-
I was smiling when I showed Sam the treehouse they had built me. He pointed out that it didn’t make sense, being called a dungeon- it was above ground and even a few feet in the air, built against a few large-trunked trees. Even when I explained that it was symbolic, he claimed to not understand my logic.
“It just doesn’t make sense.”
“Maybe you aren’t meant to make sense of everything,” I hummed. “Isn’t it cool?”
Sam nodded, tracing his fingertips against the grain of the wood couch. He stopped when he touched the blanket tossed over the back. “It is neat- I wonder what made them think to build you a treehouse. Kind of random.”
“Sweet, but random,” I agreed, looking around the room. It wasn’t small by any means, probably bigger than your average adult treehouse. “I think they all pitched in to help. That’s how they talk about it.”
“They do a lot together.”
“Yeah.”
Chapter 23
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piratefalls · 1 year
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Get to know me better!
Tag 10 people you want to get to know better
Thank you for the tag:  @ereborne i’m so bad at getting to things when you tag me in them but i did it this time. very late, but i did it.
Relationship status:  single
Favorite color(s):  i’m super into jewel tones right now.
Favorite food:  pasta, all day every day.
Song stuck in my head:  pretty much the entirety of demi lovato’s newest album. it’s been on repeat for weeks and i have yet to skip a song.
Last thing you googled:  a sample ballot for my county since midterms are coming up.
Time:  11:28 am
Dream trip: one i don’t have to pay for. but honestly, south africa to see the great whites predating. that would be awesome.
Last thing you read:  die again by tess gerritsen, part of the rizzoli and isles series.
Last book you enjoyed reading: also, die again. i love this series. i’m sad i only have two books left.
Last book you hated reading:  the whisper man by alex north. it was all over bookstagram and advertised as a spooky thriller, but i got like 100 pages into it and was still bored. 
Favorite thing to cook/bake: i don’t know that i have a specific thing i like to cook, mostly because i cook different things every time i really go all out. i do make a lot of kinds of pasta, and i’m pretty good with chicken, and i make a pretty solid chuck roast. red meat is for some reason very hard for me to master.
Favorite craft to do in your free time: i am 1000% not a crafty person. most of my free time is dedicated to talking myself into doing basic household chores and/or showering.
Most niche dislike: people who add extra shit to grilled cheese sandwiches claiming it’s still a grilled cheese. it’s not. it’s a hot sandwich. a grilled cheese has only cheese. i have no idea why this bothers me so much, but it does.
Opinion on circuses:  i’m sort of meh on them. never been to one, have no desire to go to one.
Do you have any sense of direction:  not even a little, at least in areas i’m not familiar with. drop me in a field? i’m dead.
Tell us about your D&D character:  i have literally never played this game nor been in its general vicinity. i have friends who love it though.
Tag-list: i’m not going to tag anyone but if you do it, please tag me so i can see!
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cynicalhag · 2 years
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Did you ever pretend you were someone else as a favor for a friend?
No.
Do you think men prefer curvy women or skinny women?
It differs. Does for everyone.
Do you own a water gun?
Nope.
What item most embarrasses you to purchase?
I don’t know why but I always feel weird buying alcohol. It feels illegal in some way, probably because I was raised in a sober environment.
Do you know any actual dances or do you just move to the music?
I don’t dance. Makes me feel awkward. I just bob my head or something like that. 
Do you eat pork and beans?
No. That sounds nasty and I also don’t eat meat.
What is the last thing you refered to as legit?
No idea.
Or do you think that term is lame?
It is kinda lame.
Do you give cards to people for holidays or events?
No. It feels a little bit cheap to me. Unless you buy one as an addition to a gift maybe.
Do you have anything hanging from the ceiling of your room?
Yeah, I have a chandelier in there.
The rear view mirror of your car?
I don’t drive so I don’t have a car.
which do you prefer, dr or dentist?
None of them bother me that much. Though it depends on what you’re going to the doctor for. I haven’t been to a gynaecologist yet but I think you have to when you turn 24 here so I have it coming and that does not sound very fun. I don’t have an issue with dentists at all though. I had braces so I went in every sixth weeks or something so I got used to it. 
Do you know which side your appendix is on?
Yes, it’s on the left.
Do you have the fixins in your fridge to make a sandwich? What kind?
No. I don’t eat sandwiches a lot.
Are any walls of your room blank?
No. All of them have some kind of print or something on them. 
When was the last time you ate fruit?
Two days ago. I made fruit salad as a snack at work. It is always appreciated.
What color are your favorite shoes?
Doc Martens have been a staple for me for years. Mine are black.
If someone was willing to tell your crush you liked them would you let them?
I don’t have a crush but I’d prefer to do it myself, even though I’m a chicken when it comes to these things. It seems kinda weird to let someone else do it. Do adults do that?
Do you know the zodiac signs of your friends?
I know that Ellen and Adam are cancers but I’m not sure when it comes to Frida. I’m not into zodiac signs. 
Favorite dog ever, real life and cartoon.
I don’t think I have one...
Do you own anything with fur on it? What?
No real fur, no. Would never buy that.
Do you choose surveys based on their titles?
Nah.
what would be worse for you, unplanned pregnancy or cancer?
Cancer. Abortions are a thing. I don’t feel like these two options are comparable.
What was the last thing you made from scratch?
I cooked yesterday. Wheat berries cooked in tomato sauce. It’s really good.
Do you drink any hot beverages? What?
I drink coffee occasionally.
Do you put Q-tips in your ear or just round the outside?
I don’t use Q-tips. I never really feel like I need to? I use them for cleaning up makeup though.
Have you ever popped another person's zit?
Nope. 
When was the last time you listened to a radio,NOT online?
I never do that. Ellen does though so last time was when I went to Belgium in July.
Do you have any odious chores hanging over your head?
I have a shit ton of plastic bottles that I have to hand in. 
What is the last thing you confessed to someone?
Not sure.
Have you ever told a friend to dump their SO? Did they?
I don’t think so, actually. 
Name two things you put whipped cream on?
I never eat whipped cream. Not a fan of it.
Who is the last person who saw you with bare feet?
I think Adam? 
What do you think is the coolest piercing on someone else?
I’m a fan of nose piercings in general. I have a septum myself. I like nose wing piercings but not studs. Only rings. 
Colored tattoos or plain?
Black and white. I rarely think coloured tattoos look good.
Do you ever eat peanut butter straight from the jar?
No. I don’t really like peanut butter that much.
Do you know how to ride a bike? Do you own one?
I do and yes, but I don’t use it that often. I did bike a little bit during the summer though. I live quite close to downtown now so it’s nice to bike instead of taking the bus sometimes.
What was the last pill you took for?
Anti psychotic. 
How many devices do you own that hook up to internet?
Three. My phone, laptop and TV.
Any best friends you only know online?
No. Ellen and I started off as online friends though.
Do you ever talk to your next door neighbor?
No. I just nod and say hello to them.
Do most of your friends live in houses, apartments or mobiles?
Apartments. Therese owns a house though which is insane. She bought it with her fiance when she was like 20. She got help from her parents though.
Did anything shock you today?
Well yeah. I overslept. There’s nothing worse than getting that phone call in the morning from work where they ask where you are. 
What is the thing you last stubbed your toe on?
I don’t remember.
Favorite faux curse word
I don’t use any of those. I have sort of a bad mouth. I swear a little too much.
Who do you tease most often and what about?
I tease my coworkers a lot. We have a playful relationship with each other and it’s great. A lot of inside jokes. 
slip on or lace up shoes?
Lace up.
Thing you stress over most about the holidays.
Being around family. There’s a lot of weird shit going on in my family and bad vibes usually occur. It can be fun to go to family gatherings but it mostly stresses me out. 
Food you take a second helping of on Thanksgiving?
I don’t celebrate Thanksgiving.
Would you rather spend Thanksgiving with friends or family?
I would consider celebrating Thanksgiving if I had an American friend but I don’t.
Most disgusting bug.
Leeches, if they count as bugs. They’re more like parasites. Centipedes are also disgusting.
nastiest thing in your fridge.
There’s nothing nasty in my fridge. Why would I buy something that’s nasty? Well, I do sometimes find vegetables with mold on them in there so that’s a thing.
song you hate but keep singing anyway.
I don’t think there are any.
cookies or brownies.
Cookies. I don’t like overly chocolatey things. 
Do you own any movie soundtracks? Which?
No.
How many pillows do you sleep with?
Two.
Favorite outdoors smell.
Lilacs in early summer. That is lovely.
are you wearing a hoodie right now?
No.
Do you ever sleep in your day clothes?
No. I can’t sleep wearing actual clothes. Just a t-shirt and underwear.
Do you prefer your clothes loose or close fitting?
I prefer loose clothing. Tight clothes make me feel uncomfortable.
Are your fave pants jeans?
No. They’re trousers. I don’t really like any of my jeans. I need to buy new ones.
Do you own any under things bought to impress the opposite sex?
Lol no.
Favorite thing you've ever painted?
I can’t remember the last time I painted something, except for in school. I don’t think anything turned out very good. I’m not a crafty person.
Do you eat applesauce?
No. I don’t like it.
Are there any songs that remind you of your mother?
Yeah, some. My mom doesn’t listen to a lot of music but she likes this one local band so if I do hear a song of theirs I will think of her.
If you had a sister, would you prefer her older or younger? Why?
I have a sister and she is eight years older than me but it feels like shes younger than me because she has autism. I think it would’ve been cool to have an older sister that feels older than you that you could have a nice relationship with and look up to, but I mean I have my brother so it’s fine.
What is something you wanted to say today, but didnt?
I can’t think of anything.
Where are your keys right now?
In the hallway.
Is there any product you always buy at the dollar store?
No. I don’t go to the dollar store. There is one or two in my city but I don’t go there.
Can you recite any prayers by heart?
No. I think I could when I was a child but not anymore.
When it's your birthday, do you have the correct number of candles?
I feel like the cake will look kinda crowded if you’re older than 18.
birthday cake alone, or cake and ice cream?
I’m not a fan of cake. I like carrot cake though.
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keenregine · 2 years
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Don't wanna close my eyes, I don't wanna fall asleep I miss writing. It’s not everyday I get to collect all these ideas in one sitting, usually happens during late nights. But even until now, my thoughts are elusive and scattered. To make this writing effective in a timely manner, I will use my old method of looking back from what I wrote last. Give me a second, will you? I don’t consider myself as particularly chatty person, but I always feel like I share way too much information. Maybe I should tone down that side of me. But this is writing, so words are kind of important and compulsory. Wow, that was a quick rebuttal. The last time I wrote an entry was when I was in Madrid sitting on a dark room in an ungodly hour, telling my tales about Portugal which was dated September last year 2021. So, I got a lot of catching up to do that nobody ever asked, tabs re-opened. We went back to Madrid after that trip, and what’s left to do is to roam around more. We went to a local fish and meat market which I find interesting but I’m not much of a help because I don’t really cook. Did I mention about churros already? If not, then you’re about to read some churros story. It’s a well known dessert of elongated deep-fried pastry dipped into melted chocolate. I admit I’m not a big fan of this but it wouldn’t hurt to try. Alex took me to La Chocolateria San Gines established way back 1894; only the oldest in the world. Putting up the year right there just below the restaurant name will certainly build up much expectations, plus the line of people outside on a massive rainy day shows just that. Finally getting in was a relief although the place was loud and crowded, but it’s okay because the delectable smell of the chocolate quite sets off the balance. Of course, the main event was the churros itself, since I don’t have tons of comparison; I thought that the taste was 10/10, that it was the highest standard of churros ever. You have to agree that every individual is different and so is our taste buds. To assess it accurately, I went ahead and try other churros specialty restaurants (I tried 4 if I’m not mistaken). And I find one that suites my taste perfectly, one that is near just two blocks from Gines, wait I’m getting way ahead of myself. Actually, I got serious with the churros hunt on my second visit in Madrid, and the reason for that is we have found the ultimate best churros we ever tasted and it’s not in Madrid but in Amsterdam. I swear on my grave. I’m testing whether I could find the same exact quality of that churros we had in Ams, but unfortunately. .soon we will get there. There’s this one place in Madrid I keep coming back to almost everyday and I never get tired of it. The place where the kilometer zero is, Sol which translates into ‘sun’, I googled it just now, it’s not that hard to look for answers these days. Former co - workers of Alex have invited us to drink in their home and after that we went back to the center on a bar to extend the house party. Boy I was drunk, when I went through my camera roll the next day I did a vlog showing the sisig that I successfully took away from his friends house, to the bar and lastly home. Alex told me I was so drunk that I snatched the mic from someone (within our circle) and sang I don’t wanna miss a thing with complete hand motions and dramatization. Okay, enough details about that. All in all I had a great awesome time. One of his Kuya friends told us he can take us and have a tour to the restaurant where he works, it’s kind of a big deal because it’s once in a lifetime chance and not everyone can get that kind of access, I have never been more excited. Again, we’re seeing the oldest restaurant in the world according to the Guinness World Records, in operation since 1725. 18th century guys, my mind was blown. I get goosebumps just from the thought that having the tour was more meaningful and memorable than actually dining in. I mean if you know me well, I love old ancient historical things. Felt like I was in a time machine the first moment I stepped in. Call me exaggerated and all. Kuya was nice enough to share with us the stories embedded on those walls, like which famous person have sat on that very spot, with pictures and everything. Everything was well kept, in a way that they maintained the same exact arrangement and decor from when it was built the first time probably with some minor fixes. Ancient looking but stands the test of time, I was fully immersed. The eerie unused wine cellar basement, the same old tables and chairs. The wooden stairwell, the windowpanes, the paintings hanging, the mini underground banquet, and dome brick ceiling. The menu which I carefully kept and took with me, with permission lol. And the kitchen, oh gosh I get to see the line up of roast suckling pigs about to be served. How cool is that, it was a tour I would never forget, worthy of telling my future children. For the remaining few days of my stay, I managed to see the opening of the first ever branch of Jollibee in the entire Spanish soil. This is the only moment I saw massive number of Filipinos in one place since I arrived, they didn’t mind the long queue just to taste the feeling of home. Well, I can’t blame them because we waited for our turns as well. As if there’s no Jollibee here in Riyadh, but still. It’s Jollibee we’re talking about. Totally unrelated to the previous topic, I got a tattoo. Yay! (don’t tell my mom lol) I would say it was a spontaneous decision, mostly afraid of any ‘ragrets’. Lol but I had it for five months now and I’m still in love with it. I’m glad I came up with an idea of putting KD on my left wrist after few hours of considering other viable options. It’s unique, I’m the only one who has it, please. . I don’t want to look it up on the internet searching ‘mini pinscher wrist tattoos’ I might get disappointed. Experience wise, it didn’t hurt a lot than I expected, knowing from Alex that also has a tattoo in his arm. The highlighting maybe, because it’s in full linear motion, as if a scalpel is dragging across your skin, exposing your epidermis, cutting your vein emo style. But it didn’t take long, plus my breathing technique helped a ton. I’m happy that whenever I see my wrist, a little angel is there. I hope not soon, but if our Lord decides to take Keisha, without second thoughts I will also put her next to KD. I feel like I’ve been writing here for ages with my numbing buttocks and upon checking I only made few paragraphs. Keep up! Okay, apart from the churros, another important local cuisine worth trying would be the famous Paella, also pronounced as ‘pa-eh-yah’. Better say it it right if you don’t want to offend another crazy patriotic waiter, like we had in Barcelona. Not the exact same scenario, but you'll get the gist. I scanned and I believe I haven’t told the story of how we upset a waiter in Barca. Very quick story with a valuable lesson. In Madrid, whenever we drink, our beer of choice is the brand Mahou, we didn’t have the slightest clue that you can just sit in a bar in Barcelona and order the same Mahou brand. When we did just that, the waiter serving us was obviously became upset to the point where he threw the coaster in the table and said in Spanish, I’ll translate. Not word for word perhaps, but he said ‘Mahou is only served in Madrid, you’re in Barcelona’, we made a further mistake of asking him in his current state which brand should we order then. He said Estrella Galicia, we agreed and that’s the part where the coaster tantrum happens. We absolutely learned something that night. Lol. I really appreciate the time and effort of any person reading my blog, no matter who you guys are, or whether there’s someone out there or not, at least I get the feeling of someone cares to listen on my endless blabbering, imagine, you made it this far and you’re still reading. Look! goosebumps again! super lol. Going back, Alex and her sister took me to a Paella specialty restaurant, not a big fan again but I figured it wouldn’t hurt to try. Of course this is not the first time I tasted Paella. But I don’t have a long record of eating it as well, the comparison is narrow. In general, I like salty foods (including seafood) and rice together in one meal but it’s way too salty for me, but I enjoyed most of it, drinking water from time to time. I was just surprised when I went to the bathroom, there were guys who entered too casually, so much for a ‘common bathroom’ definition. The saddest thing about leaving is well. .leaving. Not only going back to work is a drag but I will be away from Alex which is the hardest part. Not for long because on the next episode I will continue my endless energetic story telling. Or should I keep goin-
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my-darling-boy · 3 years
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Where have plant based meat substitutes been all my life 👁👄👁
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