#I don’t think I want to be alive | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

x-gon-give-it · 10 months

Text

Headcanon, theory, prediction, whatever you want to call it,

but I think the reason that the universe Miquel hijacked collapsed, and not Miles, despite them both being “anomalies” is because Miquel was trying to change someone else’s story, as opposed to Miles who inspires other people to change their own stories.

Like, Miquel tried to force himself into a universe that wasn’t his. He took the place of his counterpart and pretended to be him, he was playing a part that wasn’t meant for him, he was changing a story that wasn’t his. And the universe rejected that.

Whereas Miles inspires people to change their own stories. His universe didn’t collapse because that’s HIS universe. It’s HIS story to tell, and sure the plot changed along the way, but he’s still telling it.

The same with 42-Miles. His story was drastically changed because he wasn’t bitten by that spider, but his universe isn’t collapsing because he’s the one still telling the story. He’s still shaping his own future.

And like how Miles inspired Peter B to have Mayday at all. Without Miles, Peter wouldn’t have gone back to his and he wouldn’t have had Mayday. But his universe isn’t collapsing because that’s a decision PETER made. No one forced him to make up with MJ and have Mayday. But Miles gave him faith and inspired him to go back and give life another try. (Don’t even get me started how Peter would have literally DIED if not for Miles. He was going to stay in Miles dimension. He was fully ready to deteriorate. He literally would have died if not for Miles saying “NO BITCH YOU GOTTA GO HOME” much less inspiring him to have Mayday, I’m just saying I’m just saying.)

And the thing is I don’t think Miquel realizes that. He’s so caught up in his grief and anger that he’s completely consumed with following canon and my never disrupting ANYTHING. He doesn’t realize that that universe collapsed because he tried to change someone ELSES story. He tried to become someone else to live their story. He didn’t try to make his own and that’s not how it works.

Idk just thinking thots tonight, And ATSV is always at the top of my brain

#i May just being delusional and rambling #but idk #it makes sense to me #im excited to see how the third movie ends #the conclusión #I WANT ANSWERS DAMMIT #gimme gimme gimme #also I think we collectively brushed over the fact real quick that Peter would have literally DIED if not for Miles #like i jusr think about that sometimes #Peter was in such a low place that he was okay with sacrificing himself in Miles’ universe #sacrificing himself to an INCREDIBLY painful death #but Miles saved him and inspired him to keep living and now he has a beautiful daughter and a beautiful wife #and he couldn’t have a better life if he tried #all thanks to that amazing kid who made him feel alive again #im deep in the feels tonight fam #i don’t know what else to say #peter parker #spider-man #miles Morales #miguel o'hara #Spider-Man 2099 #ATSV #ITSV #atsv spoilers

758 notes · View notes

rubydubydoo122 · 18 days

Text

Ok…so I saw a post about Dick hating Jason after he came back from the dead and like… it said that canonically, Dick wishes Jason stayed dead.

And, like, yeah, I guess that makes sense, but it also rubbed me in the wrong way? Like… hrgh.

But like… I’ll accept that Dick didn’t like Jason when Jason was 17/18/19 taking over Gothams crime. ONLY BECAUSE—

And ONLY because, as someone who has multiple siblings, especially in dysfunctional households, you hate them for the longest time of your life either because

A.) your parents put a sibling on a pedestal or

B.) because a sibling refuses to stay within the boundaries that the parent has created,

which is literally the problem for both Dick and Jason.

In Jason’s eyes, Dick is the golden child and can do no wrong. In Dicks eyes, he sees Jason’s ‘crime lord’ era as petty teenage rebellion, and blatant disrespect towards Bruce and his morals/teachings.

Eventually, you realize that at the end of the day, the only person who really understands you is your sibling. They more or less went through the same thing, they just have a different way of processing through it. So one random Tuesday, you’ll be acting like you haven’t been hating each other your whole life, and then a couple years later you’ll be saying things like ‘remember that time I almost killed you’ and ‘oh yeah, I absolutely hated you back then’ but you’ll be laughing as you say it because it was genuinely so petty the way you acted with/towards them when you should’ve been hating your parents.

TLDR: parents playing favorites will lead to sibling resentment but eventually turn into a lifelong bondage that’s stronger than iron

#jason todd #batfam #dc comics #dick grayson #batman #red hood #nightwing #if you don’t understand this #you’re an only child #that’s the only thing I can tell you #I also think Dick not wanting Jason alive was him working backwards through his stages of grief #idk if it was denial or unloading acceptance

126 notes · View notes

ewwww-what · 8 days

Text

Hey girl, what the fuck is your problem?

111 notes · View notes

puppyeared · 1 year

Text

Space girl

#red and blue colours are based on the North and south points on a compass and the nasa logo colours ^^ compass bc I kept thinking about how #astronaut is supposed to mean ‘star sailor’ and it stuck with me lol #and apparently real space suits are heavy because the moon lacks atmosphere and with all the air used to keep the person alive #so I thought adding adjustable weights rock lee style would be cool. and to kind of balance the bottom half from the top #IM RLY PROUD OF THE HELMET THOUGH I’ve wanted it too look like a gacha capsule for ages and I think it came out right this time #you would have to slide the screen of the helmet up like those toy helmets. and then you can flip it back on its hinge #didn’t have enough room to make a comparison between the helmet mode and collar mode but oh well. I don’t draw it enough anyway so it’ll #come up eventually shrug.. and ofc the logo a la nasa space suit #my art #myart #my oc #oc development #character design #original character #my characters #oc #Augusta #reference sheet #oc ref sheet #astronaut

659 notes · View notes

aroanthy · 25 days

Text

i love how fraught and complicated discourse around various utena characters ‘dying’ is when anthy is literally stabbed to death eternally by a million swords imbued with human hatred. and then utena gets stabbed to death by them also. like. ‘death’ is incredibly interesting in rgu because most of the time it’s this ambiguous figurative thing that has interesting implications re: ohtori as a closed-off world one can escape. we are all trapped in our coffins. mamiya is the only named character with a grave. nemuro memorial hall functions as one all the same. ruka is implied to have died in the hospital— was he dead all along? who was the boy we saw for these two episodes? is this dead boy the same boy, or is this just another coincidence from the shadow girls, cutting like a knife? it’s heavily implied that akio and anthy murder kanae by poisoning her, adding to the previous implication that they were poisoning mr ohtori too, but there are no perceptible consequences of this. kanae’s absence is not felt. she’s fed an apple slice. what happens to the bodies? we know what happened to the 100 boys, but what about everyone else? and so on and so forth. ‘death’ is a tricky thing in utena, i think it’s constantly functioning on figurative and literal levels in very different ways for very different purposes. dios died. dios was dying. dios didn’t die. he grew up. etc etc

#what am i trying to say here?#idk! think about all of the pieces you have #dying is complicated in ohtori in countless different ways #and i find it boring to see so much ‘this character is dead and that’s it’ stuff #when death is used farrrrrrr more figuratively than some ppl give credit for #and i think the movie too does wonderful things with death #and what ‘dying’ really means #being disbelieved. being forgotten. being rejected. haunting despite this #much more interesting to think about wrt commentary on abusive relationships than it is #to think about what?? oh me when my brother died but plot twist he’s alive and can walk on this road all cool. like?????#akio doesn’t have the power to make himself revenant #he THINKS he does and he absolutely has power when he’s alive and he imbues that power with such meaning that it does live on after him #but ANTHY. anthy is the one struggling with herself and her feelings and the impact of trauma and abuse (that power!!) in aou #he’s dead? he died? she brought him back through her memories? or she’s left him (metaphorical death) and he’s haunting her??#all such interesting interpretations #i haven’t mentioned touga bc i don’t have the energy today. if dead and just illusion of others memories then why active. why awful #like in aou akio is only Obviously scummy when he’s alive. his illusory self is based upon anthy’s love for him #if anime!touga is nothing more than nanami/whoever’s memories of him before he died……. why does he actively choose to suck again and again #like nanami wouldn’t do that. unless it was meant to be a subconscious thing like ooo he’s dead all along but that’s not what her arc is #it’s not ‘he’s been dead all along’ literally or figuratively. it’s ‘he’s unsafe and i don’t want him’#sigh. once again i am asking people to think about nanami and touga’s dynamic through touga’s eyes #it’s so interesting to me how people forget to consider his motivations or feelings on ANYTHING #like sure his motivations and feelings are scummy but they’re interesting!!!!! they intrigue me!!!!#compel me even #anyway ignore how i said i didn’t have the energy for this and then typed it all out anyway #dais.txt

67 notes · View notes

hazelcephalopod · 6 days

Text

IMHO. I would totally get if FCG stays dead -especially bc it’s Sam- but it’s worthwhile to mention that resurection may still be possible. Revivify worked, but I could see short term rez is on the table longer term isn’t. Resurrection is a part of dnd as much as character death is, you can’t expect them not to use a core part of the game if it’s in any way available. Something like Reincarnate which is a fifth level Druid spell that requires 1k gold of rare oils and other nature stuff, is very accessible to them rn. Fearne can prepare it -idk if Flame Druid gets it automatically like Revivify. And Sam might go for it because it causes the character to come back in a completely new body -the race is determined by rolling on a d100 table. So if they were going to do it, imho, funniest most chaotic option for them.

Now, the only potential problems are-

-souls has to be willing as well and in that I’m 50/50 at best. Unless FRIDA is there for it, in which case… that could raise it depending on whatever they decide to do.

-they need the ingredients.

-and again. How well does resurrection work rn?

#critical role #cr spoilers #critical role spoilers #If you could redirect anyone or even only the recently dead to fully alive #Why the hell wouldn’t you unless they clearly said they didn’t want that?#Which. I don’t think they did

24 notes · View notes

stuckinapril · 8 days

Note

u are literally so strong for being pre med. im also 21 and ive just about given up on taking the mcat and doing extracurriculars after army crawling through all the prereqs 😭 much luck to you!!!!!! praying john hopkins takes u 🙏🙏 we need more lovely, kind and genuine doctors like you and u deserve the best of the best 💖💖

Thank you my dove <3 no it’s literally the most ruthless thing ever. People don’t understand the mental stamina it takes to fulfill all facets of the application med schools expect. It’s more than a full time job—sometimes it doesn’t feel like there are enough hours in the day tbh, between doing research and volunteering and shadowing and gaining hands on experience. And don’t get me started on the mcat lmao, preparing for it feels like I’m training for the Olympics. I’m into it most days, it’s fun to be consumed by something you’re truly passionate about, but I also completely get how it predisposes all of us to frequent burnouts. Add to that the stress of meeting the still more extraordinary, still more impossible standards of elite med schools…

#And usually I wouldn’t give a fuck for prestigious names but I want to become a surgeon #And surgery specialties DO care about the school you went to. They care ab the prestige #So I’m trying to score the highest I possibly can and just go above and beyond #To clarify a big part of it (the biggest part) is bc I’m passionate about everything I do #But I also know it’s what they’d want to see #I get the most shocked looks when I tell people I want to become a neurosurgeon LMAOOO #And even for someone like me who loves school it’s such an overwhelming thought at times #But it is unfortunately what I want to do w my life… I don’t think I’d be happy settling for anything else #And ik id want to be doing this even if i were the richest person alive #So im doing it for the right reasons & that’s why im sure of my trajectory

23 notes · View notes

anthenasikes · 9 days

Text

summertime ☀️ !!!

#YAYYY GOOFY WEIRD FLESH GIRL !!! i imagine she’s just shifting her hair and eye colors around all the time #jrwi #jrwi pd #summer jrwi #summer dileo #jrwi prime defenders #ant’s art tag #We are trying to post this again! Because this website hates putting any of my posts in the tags!#Anyways #Every time she shapeshifts she gets more and more off from her original appearance. Thats a thing in canon she is slowly looking less and #less like her original body #Can we talk about this can we think about this #bc i am thinking about this #A lot #girls when they get burned up alive and then remade with fake goop flesh.#and are drifting further and further from their original appearance. and maybe don’t even notice #Also the cardigan isnt part of the hero fit i just wanted to draw it #shes taking a break for a sec !#can we bring her back. season 3 bring her back Pleeeaasseee please please . the silly……. the silly who also gets more concerning the more #you think about it #has id

30 notes · View notes

captain-lovelace · 17 days

Text

#my poetry #Horuspoetry #This one’s never gonna get professionally published so here it is #I usually hate writing lowercase poetry but I thought the unfinished look it gives #poems worked with the subject matter #I also wanted to work in a space detailing the experience of growing up neurodivergent #where you are functionally gendered as a failure #A lot of the details (the burying or the hands-to-eyes) are based on my own life. As is like. The general feeling. Which was basically my #standard from ages 3-9. the description of things outside is based on the memories I have of my old backyard when I was really little #And of the park I used to go to #I have a lot of memories of thinking of myself as basically already dead but also not really *understanding* the difference between being #dead and alive?#Idk. I think the perspective I am writing from is that of the child #but also in some ways I’ve noticed the way I behave towards my memories of my past self resembles the ableist way adults treated me when I #was a kid #As if somehow #There was something just… wrong with me and me only and so I deserved it #So this was also an attempt to show compassion to that child and break from that belief. To say ‘this was fucked up’#And that I don’t believe that there was something wrong with me after all and even if there HAD been I wouldn’t have deserved that treatmen #No one does

21 notes · View notes

justanechoflower · 3 months

Note

horror: OK WHO THREW THAT PAN AT KILLER?!

Dust: eh, horror, you handle whoever threw that pan, I'll take the weed

*dust begins to send in fireballs and blasters to try and cook flowey*

Killer: EMOTIONALDAMAGE.MP4

*Flowey burrows away to dodge, and pops up two rooms ahead to discuss the action plan hastily with Kara.*

*Flowey seems nervous, and rightfully so… This will be a tricky battle.*

(Also there is a transcript in the tags if anyone is struggling to read my writing)

6/10 - Safety

27 notes · View notes

arctic-bookclub · 10 months

Text

you know what gets me the most about the code dropping the eggs’ signature items as a way of tormenting and taunting the members? is that it seems to be dropping them primarly to the eggs’ parents/family

like it dropped leo’s head(s) directly to foolish (twice to make sure there was no uncertainty), it dropped the first poppy/amapola directly to phil and waited for him to pick it up before throwing another one to bad, and i can’t check the vod but the stack of apples it dropped at ninho was when aypierre was there with everyone protecting the eggs (and ninho also has been crucial for pomme’s safety so i guess that counts for it too)

it’s giving these threats directly to the egg’s parents/family, instead of just a general taunt like the apple in the water. like ’hey, once the election is over (or whatever time to code starts attacking again), your child will die’

#qsmp #qsmp philza #qsmp foolish #qsmp aypierre #qsmp code entity #qsmp binary monster #qsmp binary entity #this is like. pointing out the obvious #but anyway it still hurts #i also wonder if the items are like a hitlist as in like the order of targets #or just the code tormenting whoever is online and who’s signature item it can recall #i bet it’ll drop a potato or a mooshroom head next #solely because those are the only signature items i can think of hgfkkhf #maybe tnt for ramon?#no idea what dapper’s would be other than maybe the bell?#because everything else he’s associated with like the scythe might be too op to just drop as a warning #also goddamn we don’t have many eggs left do we #the fact that i could actually list out all thw ones that are alive without checking is worrying like wdym we only have 7 left #not adding any main tags other than qsmp because eh #also if any pierre enjoyers want to correct me feel free to do so #oh also unrelated but #i was meant to post this earlier but i forgor #shey’s rambles

76 notes · View notes

pois0ncandy · 1 month

Text

life is boring and meaningless i should just kms

#what is there to live for?#absolutely nothing #everyone keeps saying that “it’ll get better”#“this won’t last forever and then years go by and it’s still exactly the same #the world is going to shit #i don’t make enough to survive on my own #and finding a new job is practically impossible these days #i have no one to even talk to #i don’t want to talk to anyone anyways #like what’s the point?#i’ve been holding out for so long and for nothing #fruitless endeavors #empty promises #forgotten dreams #any hope i had is gone #can’t believe i stayed alive this long all for some dipshit who doesn’t even live in my country and has forgotten my existence #like why have i put myself through this #there is no point #pathetic #i hate everything #i just don’t think living is for me #and it never has been #and i’ve always known this but tried so so hard to change how i feel to find some meaning in life and it was all for nothing

16 notes · View notes

kyotosummer · 2 months

Text

I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort I want comfort

STOP MAKING LEONARDO SUICIDAL.

#rottmnt #I’m so fucking done I just want comfort TEENAGE Leo fic where no one thinks he’s fucking suicidal #a circumstance in a fic could push him that way #but that is NOT his default #like fuck dude please actually tell me what the other 3 could have done #other than work together to get Leo out #I get he knows he might not have made it out #but to dismiss the ‘took you guys long enough quote #to just be another one liner #instead of a way to sum up his character arc to show he actually is trusting his team #he just needs to work on communication now #it’s a disservice to the character #the fucker wants to live he survived in the apocalypse he just doesn’t want to live without his bros #and his bros don’t want to live without him #see everyone fucking sacrificing themselves in the apocalypse to keep him and Mikey alive #and then Mikey pulls a similar move TWICE #oh but MIKEY’S not suicidal he’s just following Leo BULLSHIT #IM JUST SOOOOOOOOO FRUSTRATED #I WANT LEO WHUMP I WANT DONNIE STRESSING OUT #I DO NOT WANT 3 PARAGRAPHS DEDICATED TO A SUICIDAL THOUGHT PROCESS #FIND A NEW KINK OMG

16 notes · View notes

polysyndetonaddictsupportgroup · 4 months

Note

based on your asks responses & characterization of yuuta this is what i’ve gathered — yuuta is like that one high school senior who looked at the new coming freshman’s & just adopted them on the spot. there’s no out. now his friends sees the kid & adopted them too. it’s a family now. a very young, close in age family. (i was yuuta in this situation 😔 i was use to be megumi in this situation but i carried the tradition out. as i should. high school & middle school was wild.)

YUUJI THOUGH. we will probably never see him in your sea glass garden au but your asks is killing me. like his one sided beef with yuuta? he’s just like me fr. i too would fight over megumi if it comes down to it.

i just know yuuji thought that yuuta & megumi was a thing at first cause of the whole “his boy thing”. i know he screamed into a pillow about it. i know he went to gojo to ask for permission to court megumi & gojo was flabbergasted at such a medieval act so he had yuuji do the dumbest shit to get his blessing (ha).

i just know nanami is sighing at the idea of his son yuuji being a jealous little brat because of his other son yuuta. i just know yuuta was so confused until he witnessed yuuji & megumi awkward ass flirting. i know he acts like a little shit to get on yuuji (& sukuna) nerves.

you know what. this is my jujutsu kaisen. this is my sorcery fight. gege who? i only know you. PLS TAKE THE PEN FROM GEGE.

Yuuta is absolutely that senior who adopted that new student and made a little family. That is His Kohai now okay megumi is their collectively raised flour sack baby and they will kill for him.

Yuuji came back to life finally met the second years had just leveled up with his cursed energy and gained a new dad got his old friends back he was so so ready to go live his best life and then his new self appointed brother opened his mouth and started rhapsodizing about some impossibly beautiful and perfect man named okkotsu yuuta and yuuji is absolutely whacked in the face a la rubber squeaky hammer that there’s some gorgeous son of a bitch out there already living his best life.

His death sentence was overturned. He’s so powerful that he can save everyone if he wants. He is the legally adopted child of Nanami Kento. The curse attached to him 1) actually liked him and 2) moved the fuck on which some people (Sukuna) could take a few notes on.

Fushiguro Megumi is his boy.

This could not have devastated him more thoroughly. Even his newly acquired self appointed brother thinks okkotsu yuuta is the perfect man, which he manages to express at length in between warnings from the second years that Yuuta’s going to fly back from Africa purely for the sake of kicking his fucking ass for touching His Boy, which yuuji simply cannot handle.

Yuuji lowkey had a new lease on life and thought “hey! Fushiguro tried to kill someone with an elephant for me! Maybe I have a shot and he’ll let me hold his hand!” and then there’s god’s perfect man off in Africa who’s enticing megumi away from movie marathons with his fucking FaceTime calls right when yuujis almost hyped himself up enough to try the yawning arm stretch thing.

He spends at least three weeks trying to figure out if Megumi’s His Boy because they’re in a long distance relationship and it only ends because maki starts finding it more annoying than funny and establishes that it is not in fact a romantic arrangement. She thinks. (Okay it’s still kind of funny.)

Yuuji resorted to a terrible wikihow on how to get someone to date you and it insisted “get their parents approval” was his in and gojo could NOT have been more of an asshole about it. Nanami had to intervene to get it to stop. He is very tired and very confused. Why are you so upset about okkotsu he’s a lovely young man why is this making you more upset

Of course if yuuji ever found out that megumi became Yuuta’s boy after Yuuta personally restarted his heart he’d instantly understand why everyone acts like Yuuta’s the best thing since sliced bread. He is that amazing.

Yuuta and Megumi are completely oblivious to all of this.

Gege pls call me I just want to help gege pls

#sea glass gardens #just remember YOU can forcibly displace gege and turn the creative property over to me #I will be making several. SEVERAL. changes.#yuuji absolutely goes back into his room and screams into his pillow over Yuuta #he was going to try to hold Megumi’s hand and Megumi left to go talk to Yuuta just because he was ‘calling all the way from Africa’ and ‘the #movie ended five minutes ago why were you just sitting there looking like you were really stressed are you okay itadori’#nobara is exhausted just watching this #she’s the most homophobic lesbian alive why do lgbtq things happen to people who don’t deserve it #god she just wants a girlfriend with a sword and these fucking assholes are the ones who get their high school romance they don’t even #APPRECIATE the gay things happening to them #ignoring all canon since we’re never getting there in sea glass gardens #when Yuuta’s coming back from Africa Megumi’s very simply stating that Yuuta’s an important person in his life and he’s glad yuuji wjll #meet him soon which might as well be a DECLARATION OF UNDYING LOVE yuuji has a total crisis #yuuta gets off the plane and fucking hugs megumi yuuji had to get boyfriend privileges to do that who is this son of a bitch #gojo watching this: do you think I can get yuuji to wash my car again if I tell him I’ll distract Yuuta so he can take Megumi on a date #Nanami: why on earth would okkotsu need to be distracted for that to happen #gojo: that’s the beauty of it it is in no way necessary but yuuji doesn’t seem to know that

24 notes · View notes

owlfacenightkit · 6 months

Text

Like every other artist in this Phandom, I’ve been thinking about Dan’s design post-AGIT

I don’t think these are super creative, but I like them (at least for now)

Might redesign him completely

I tried to base his ghost form off his normal suit, not sure how well that worked

#I just Like drawing guys with short ponytails sometimes #Danny Phantom #Danny Fenton #<-#maybe? technically I think it counts? since Dan is just overshadowing a body?#speaking of that I want to know what would happen if he overshadows this body for too long #would he actually end up owning the body and killing the spirit of the clone that’s inside of it?#or could the clone kick Dan out of the body?#don’t think Dan would like that because being anchored in this body appears to be the only way he can stay alive in this timeline #anyways. back to normal tags #Ghost #halfa #Artnatomy errors included #my art tag is so dumb /add #*aff #literally came up with it because I’m bad at anatomy #A Glitch in Time spoilers #A Glitch in Time #also I don’t think that anyone would be strong enough to reject Dan if he was overshadowing them #for goodness sake Clockwork needed help #anyways I’m done rambling in the tags now #or am I? >:3

45 notes · View notes

starstuc · 1 year

Text

i hate soukoku so much like what do you mean chuuya is sent to kill dazai in a vampire form where he possibly (?) is under the control of an ability, he is sent to kill dazai who has two broken legs and wants the pain to stop, because dazai doesn’t like pain, HE DOESNT WANT TO DIE IN PAIN, chuuya who dazai has spent 7 years thinking of ways to kill him, to annoy him, because chuuya was the one to share experiences with him. they were teens together :,)

#i want them to be together #idc if it’s in death or alive #i need them to be together #they were kids together #i hate them so much #i don’t think chuuya will kill him but still #asagiri you will be dealt with #sleep with one eye open #bungou stray dogs #bsd #nakahara chuuya #dazai osamu #bsd manga #bsd chuuya #bsd dazai #soukoku

114 notes · View notes