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themurphyzone · 6 years

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A Tail of Impawsible Purrportions Ch 8

Let’s see how things are on the other side, shall we?

Ch 8: Dogs are a Girl’s Best Friend

The mansion wasn’t the same without the cats. Diogee even found himself missing Cavendish, who had always disdainfully watched him from a cushion on the large windowsill. It was strange to be allowed in the mansion for extended periods of time.

Diogee had never minded the living arrangements before, since he’d always loved the outside. There was more to do, with howling at the butcher’s for a few bones, digging holes and covering them up before he could get caught, and playing with the kittens.

Besides, he didn’t have to watch his step outdoors. Even if there was glass shattered from a bottle thanks to a careless human, it was fairly easy to avoid. And if he didn’t get something embedded in his paw, there was Elliot to contend with.

But he couldn’t worry about the idiot butler who antagonized the kittens for no good reason at the moment. Checking on Martin, Brigitte, and Sara was far more important.

Before he could check on the Murphys, a jaunty whistle came from the foyer. Curious, Diogee turned to see Elliot hanging his coat on the rack. For someone who lived in a household where valued members of the family had gone missing, he seemed awfully chipper. Diogee bit back a growl. He didn’t like this at all.

“Oh, it’s you,” Elliot sniffed. “Well, you’re just a dog so I guess there’s no harm in letting you bear witness to the first step of making the Murphy household a safe place to live.”

Before Diogee could take offense at the ‘just a dog’ comment, Elliot unfolded the evening newspaper to the front page, which featured a large black and white splash of Orton Mahlson.

“Oh, yeah. Think he’s in town right now,” Elliot remarked, frowning. “And I’m talking to a dog as if he can read. Wonderful. But I’m digressing. My point is, I made headlines! I know it says ‘Mysterious Catnapper Abducts Family of Cats’, which makes it sound kind of bad, but I guess you can’t win ‘em all. Anyway, tomorrow begins my first day of making the mansion a safe place to live! Starting with that chipped tile in the kitchen. Big tripping hazard.”

He sauntered off to the kitchen, taking the newspaper with him.

Diogee whined softly to himself. Alerting Martin of Elliot’s actions simply wouldn’t work. Brigitte and Sara would just call him adorable and not pay attention to the message he needed to convey. He huffed. As much as he loved his family, they suffered from an inability to comprehend a different species’ language like every other human on this planet.

His only option was to find Cavendish and the kittens, bring them home, and drive Elliot out for good. But he could hardly leave now. Not when everyone was so emotionally vulnerable.

He’d have to try going out when everyone was asleep, but even that was harder when Sara needed a companion at night.

Frustrated at that selfish, incompetent butler for putting everyone into this mess, Diogee lifted his leg and relieved himself on Elliot’s shoes. Even he had to indulge in being a bad dog every once in a while.

Upstairs, the master bedroom was eerily silent. Brigitte sat at her desk, a blueprint opened in front of her. She stared at the wall, a pencil hanging loosely from her hand. Martin rubbed circles into her back as he murmured soothing words to calm her.

“They’re part of the family. How could they just suddenly be gone?” Brigitte asked.

Martin shook his head gently. “Not gone. Sounds...permanent. You know how we went to that Beethoven concerto when Sara was six and we lost her while heading out? Then the conductor found her in the orchestra pit and helped her find us? It’s something like that. We’re here, the cats decided to check out the orchestra pit, and the conductor will bring them home.”

Brigitte smiled. “Have I ever mentioned how much I love you and your analogies that make sense to no one but us?”

“Maybe once or twice,” Martin chuckled, peppering her cheek with several kisses.

Diogee nosed the door open enough for him to slip through, padding up to Martin and nudging his hand. He was rewarded with several absentminded pats to the head.

“I know you miss them too, Diogee,” Brigitte said. “You were always so good with the kittens.”

Diogee’s tail wagged at the praise, though it didn’t do much to alleviate the melancholy atmosphere.

“Mom?” Sara called from the hallway.

Brigitte stood up from her chair. “Yes, Sara?” she asked. Diogee followed her out of the bedroom. Sara stood at the top of the stairs with his leash in hand, fidgeting with the loop anxiously.

“I can’t sleep, Mom,” Sara confessed. “Do you think I could just take Diogee out for an evening walk? He’s kinda been cooped up for a while. And I think I just need to tire myself out.”

“Well, if Diogee wants to, then I have no problem with it,” Brigitte assured her. “But be sure to stay on the grounds.”

Diogee offered no resistance when Sara hooked the leash to his collar. Then he led her down the stairs as Brigitte called out a few reminders. Sara frowned as she unlocked the door, glancing at the soaked brown shoes that were suspiciously laying far away from the rest of the family’s footwear.

“So did Elliot’s idea of safetyproof include switching your favorite bowl with a boring plastic, white one?” Sara asked.

Diogee snorted. He’d better not try it.

As they passed by the stables, a sudden idea struck Diogee. He strained at his leash, barking up a frenzy as he rushed towards the area where Elliot kept his motorbike.

It had always been in poor condition, but he definitely recalled seeing Elliot come back the other night with his clothes scuffed and the sidecar missing completely. And if he could just show Sara....

“Diogee! I wanted to go by the koi pond!” Sara scolded breathlessly. “You know, I’m supposed to be the one walking you!” Despite her protests, she didn’t seem to particularly care about where they headed. He took it as a good sign.

Pawing at Elliot’s motorbike, he led Sara around so she could see the latch that used to contain the sidecar. She ran her hand over the latch, her eyebrows furrowed in thought. “That’s odd,” she said. “Where’s the sidecar? And what’s with all these weird scratches?” She peered curiously at a tiny dent.

Good. She was getting suspicious.

Then a shriek came from outside. “That’s it!” a frantic voice muttered. “That’s the last time people leave bales of hay within five feet of the entrance!”

Diogee and Sara wrinkled their noses at the smell emanating from Elliot’s shoes, which he strangely never noticed.

“Hi, Elliot. You haven’t noticed anything...strange. Right?” Sara gagged.

Elliot raised an eyebrow. “Well, my socks feel soaked, so I should probably run back and change them before I get a fungal infection. But other than that, I haven’t seen anything strange. Why would you think anything’s strange? Cause your parents haven’t seemed to notice anything either so-” he chuckled nervously, his fingers twiddling together.

Honestly, he’d seen better subtlety from the most inexperienced of shoplifters.

“Oh. Well, I was just wondering what happened to your motorbike. It looks likes it��s seen better days. And by better days, I mean it was banged up but not as badly a week ago,” Sara said, folding her arms. She and Diogee glanced at each other as Elliot tugged the collar of his shirt, a bead of sweat trickling down his neck.

“I-uh, well you see, I was out doing a routine inspection of the city!” Elliot exclaimed. “Just because I wasn’t this town’s traffic cop anymore didn’t mean people could go breaking safety laws whenever they felt like it!”

Sara raised her eyebrow. “Any violations?”

“Three instances of improper horse to cart attachments, seven gentlemen dictating letters while driving, and there was one lady with a very long mink scarf. That thing was a choking hazard, lemme tell you,” Elliot replied.

“So if that’s all normal, then why’s your sidecar missing?” Sara asked.

“I was robbed!” Elliot cried. “They jumped me when I was off-guard, those scoundrels! They made off with my sidecar, and I’m glad that’s the only thing they-“ he broke off, a look of dawning realization crossing his face. “The sidecar…if they discover it….” he muttered frantically. “Um, I have places to be tonight. Safety czar stuff, 24/7 job. You know how it is.”

With that, he shoved Sara and Diogee out of the stables, slamming the door behind them.

Diogee pawed Sara’s leg, and she knelt down to stoke his back. “Thanks, boy. You were telling me something all along, weren’t you?” she asked. Diogee barked in affirmation. She smiled. “Thought so. Elliot’s definitely acting strange. And he’s obviously not good at lying.”

They sat in silence while Sara mulled over the recent events. “Diogee, I want you to be my co-investigator. We’ll keep a close eye on Elliot, but we won’t tell Mom and Dad yet. Not until we know for certain. Call it a hunch, but I think he knows something about the cats.”

Sara trusted him to help her solve the mystery. She was a lot more than the airheaded Orton fangirl most people seemed to regard her as. She loved Cavendish and the kittens too. He could tell there was nothing else she wanted except to see them safe and sound.

Diogee missed them so much. And even if he and Cavendish never saw eye to eye on most things, he trusted that he would protect them to the best of his ability. Cavendish had a duty to protect the kittens and bring them home safely.

Just as he had a duty to comfort the humans at home that the cats would come home.

Elliot is really, really bad at villaining.

This movie is like the epitome of the butler did it.

#milo murphy's law #a tail of impawsible purrportions #diogee #sara murphy #elliot decker

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