#Gonna live post this later maybe

[riessene]

and Meera's lil outfit ref

#im definitely gonna work on it some more later but since bastie posted the art no point letting it be gathering dust any more #meera #my art #oh to be a dancer singer instrument player and concubine to the royal couple #while also maybe being a little shady🤭 #shes living the best bisexual life

[mattodore]

spinning them around

#ts4 #simblr #ts4 edit #matthias evanoff #theodore doe #echthroi #a burning house to live in #river dipping #the dof messing with theo’s beautiful face 😔 #anyway i think i’m gonna go read this 140k fic and then i'll be coming back later to read kmik heh 😋 #oh ALSO ! realized it’s theo’s birthday this month so... i'm gonna be busy these next few days :) #i have to make theo as a child and fix his teen sim and then make poses and try to figure out how exactly #i’m going to execute this idea that i have for his birthday edit #with matthias’s birthday edit(s) it took me like a week to do iirc? and i was still late posting it 😭 #like his birthday is 04/11 and i think i didn’t post it until 04/16 or something???? #a trial…. fr so difficult #with theo’s i’m planning on messing around with transparency stuff i think #or maybe like… a gallery wall effect? idk i should really start working on it now tho rather than waiting until it’s nearly the day of #which is what i did with matthias bc i forgot his birthday 😭 #but theo’s is 09/28 like i would never forget it ☝️ #but yeah……… they rlly need an emoji of a guy laying dead on the ground so i can use it #like that’s how i’m feeling thinking abt the whole process of this #unlike with matthias’s edit theo’s is meant to just be one long image #but with three scenes within it kind of? #and him at every age #so like it’s a thing idk #i can picture this edit so clearly in my mind like it comes to me very easily #but yk how it is. ideas beyond my skill level or whatever

[dandyshucks]

blinks tiredly. i decide "hm maybe i should try to expand my circle and step outside of it a little, lets go look at the main community tags" and im just greeted with a bunch of edgelords who think saying "fiction doesn't affect reality, don't like don't read" is peak activism and "fighting censorship". head in my hands. this is partially why i do not ever go into the community tags, my nervous system cannot handle blocking fifty weirdos every single day just so i can have a normal experience in the community tags hfdsjkl

#I HAVE SO MANY PEOPLE BLOCKED ALREADY. i am TRYING to curate my experience 😭😭😭 #and i have so many tags blacklisted fjdsjkl like. so many. every single variation of tag to do with those chuckleheads #which helps avoid them a lot of the time tbh bc it'll flag posts that ppl rb if the original post was tagged w any of those #so i can avoid rbing posts that have chuckleheads as the op most of the time #i also usually double check OP's blog before i rb stuff now bc man this place is rife with these weirdos #ANYWAYS. yes i want to try to engage w the community but i do not think i can handle it if theres gonna be so many edgelords jkdslfl #the only way i follow new ppl now is when yall do promo hour and i sometimes see a new face pop up fdsjkl #every now and then i have energy to try to engage with new ppl but its so difficult when so many ppl are such insufferable edgelords !!!! #''im the nasty pr-sh-pper your parents warned you about 😎'' cool man you sound like the most insufferably obnoxious person ever. :/ #''if you like CENSORSHIP-'' i am hitting block immediately bc u have a fundamental misunderstanding of what censorship actually is 👍 #I'M TIREDDDD WHY ARE PEOPLE SO DUMB ABOUT THIS STUFF. ''fiction doesn't affect reality'' I GUESS PROPAGANDA DOESNT EXIST THEN ???? #what a strange world they live in honestly. they dont understand how stories have served humans since the dawn of time. sighing loudly. #vent // #SORRY FOR THIS ONE IM JUST. ARGH. ppl talk abt encouraging community but i think maybe im not cut out for community #i want desperately to partake but i cannot handle it if it means dealing w all these bozos #it frustrates me to no end fdhsjkl and it upsets me so much and i wish i could deal w it better but. my nervous system is broken fdsjkl #i will try to expand my circle every now and then but i cannot do it often bc of this 😭 im not going to give up entirely though fdsjkl #(also this is partially why i dont tag my posts w community tags anymore bc i am just. so scared of these freaks getting their hands on it) #(the most i'll do is s.afeship or variations every now n then bc supposedly they're not in those tags fdsjkl) #delete later #dandyshucks

[listen-to-the-inner-walrus]

.

#i figured it would be nice if usamericans could not make posts about how jk rowlings transphobia is an online white person thing #because okay look i dont expect people in your country to know about it #but over here she is using her wealth and status to actively harm trans people #trans people in the uk are suffering due to her #she is a fucking threat to us #to our lives #to our existence #maybe not everyone in the uk knows about it but that doesnt fucking matter #what matters is the fact that joanne rowling is one of the wealthiest people in the country and is held in high regard and has actual sway #in politics and has been using all of that to actively harm us #and im sorry but you can fuck off with your ''bestie its not that deep'' #it is that deep #our priminister felt comfortable making a transphobic joke in the house of commons when the mother of a recently murdered trans child was #spectating and despite being given multiple chances to apologise he didnt #i regularly have to avoid the news as a trans person in this country because its so fucking depressing that i worry for my mental health #im not gonna start arguing with whoever made that post because i just dont have the energy #but jesus fucking christ #maybe for you it is a chronically online white queer thing #because YOU DONT LIVE HERE #YOU DONT LIVE IN THIS COUNTRY #so idk maybe dont fucking tell us to calm down about it #maybe recognise that a post isn't about you and just scroll past #dont invalidate the genuine threat that woman poses to us #i dont care how jk rowling is seen in your country to be honest because it really doesnt matter at this fucking point #not every thing is about your fucking country #vent post #delete later

[roaringheat]

someone hype me up and tell me im not an absolute fuckin dick so I can finally just finish breaking up with my partner/ex(??)

#vark posts #delete later #had the inital convo like maybe 4 days ago? idk #it was supposed to just be a couple days to process and then we'd come back to it to make it definitive and set boundaries #since ya know we fuckin live together #but weve been avoiding eachother like the fuckin plague and theyre just notorious for avoiding conflict in general #its driving me up the fuckin wall #but i mean ive also just been a fuckin coward too ig #its not that i dont want to just get this over with already #but ik the next 24hrs after is gonna make me wanna fuckin die #like how do u keep ur fuckin sanity after breakin things off with someone youve talked to everyday for almost 2 years #im not really emotional so id probs be fine after like a week #but its like initiating this convo is gonna feel like im putting a bullet into my own head #this is lowkey embarrassing to put out there but im in a fuckin constant state of stress i need to be put down

[tvrningout]

guess who just finished delwyn's bio B)))

#BABY BOOOOY #there might be some editing later but i'm happy for now!! #also so sorry that bio's are basically lil story snippets now asdfg i cannot stomach writing a summary of my muses' lives anymore #unless i do a bullet point style like i have for ciaran and yoshi and that's bc the inspiration wasn't hitting me at the time #it just isn't fun for me to write and i don't think it ever was?? which is why i struggled so much with it #bc whenever i write these kinds of bios with ' chapters ' i really enjoy them and don't have nearly the trouble #anyway -- tangent aside!!! i'm so excited to have delwyn on this blog!!! #he's staying as a test muse just while i get the feel for his character again #writing his stats and rambling about him on the dash will definitely help with that :' ) #but for now i'm taking a wee break uvu and making a note to myself to talk about lif's line of magic #bc while there isn't exactly element-specific magic in dorverold -- or it isn't common #lif's line of magic can involve the seasons and thus the elements #that's the basic gist but i do need to put it in a post #ANYWAY i'm gonna maybe watch something spooky bc that's been the vibe #if anyone has recommendations send them my way bc i love hearing about stuff y'all like! #get ready to ramble | ooc

[daz4i]

suicide and general negativity ig

i hate that english doesn't have a good word for מיואש (filled with despair. hopeless? ig) bc this is how i'm feeling fr

there is just. nothing good. and there is so much bad - both BAD bad bc of the war but also mundane bad bc yknow, Life - that i'm getting so overwhelmed i can't handle anything

my whole month is filled with medical shit and there's probably gonna be even more bc i need more tests and they're all just. such a pain to do (it sounds whiny but genuinely i can't handle them. just thinking abt them makes me so anxious bc they all require lots of painful preparation, sometimes for a few days, and they're so gross and require being poked with needles which my medical trauma certainly isn't helping with. and even tho i did so many already they can't find shit and i'm so tired i'm so done with this body

and like. it'd be one thing if i wanted to live. if i wanted to make my life better or thought it was possible. but by now i know it's not and i know i won't so it just becomes infinitely harder. like if i compare life to being in prison, it feels like the warden decided to torture me just for fun to make it even worse

but there is nothing good there is nothing to look forward to bc everything is shit and nothing's worth it and i hate when ppl tell me to enjoy the little things bc there is nothing to enjoy about them either. i can't have most of them anyway. i wish i could. but this shitty ass body and fucked up brain won't let me

there is no future for me i know i'm never gonna amount to anything when i can't even do the most basic shit about being human, literally how am i gonna be able to fulfill my """"potential"""" when i can't even do stuff like eat or sleep normally. when i can't go outside. when i can't handle being around people. when my body crashes and burns after standing for a few minutes or walking for more than a couple hundred meters. what even IS there for me to achieve in such a state. the only win i can have is getting out of bed and it doesn't feel like a win because i don't. want. to live. i have fucking professionals, people getting paid to help me do at least some of these things, and i can't bring myself to even take the first step bc just thinking about it makes me clam up so bad i can't move or talk and everything starts hurting so much more

there's not even. mundane fun. or joy. bc no one i know has time or energy for that. bc that's just what being an adult is ig. not that there's much to do in order to have fun anyway. like i said nothing to look forward to everything is so shit and nothing actually brings me joy anyway and it's not like i can handle being around people enough to help with that

i was not meant to be alive i am not designed to exist and like at this point I'd assume my who knows how many near death experiences may have been the universe trying to correct the mistake that is my existence and for some reason not managing to pull through the final stretch

i'm so tired i'm so done with this i wish i could be killed in some certain quick way bc i can't. i can't handle any of this. this is too much

#vent #a very long one. because. i am doing very bad rn 👍 #i am in the trenches as they say. #suicide // #what if i take a bunch of pills. ik i'm just more likely to throw up then get hospitalized but man :/ #my body is so fragile yet so resilient at the same time. it can't handle anything but it survives through everything #man i'd ask for help rn but idk what even could help me rn. other than being killed i mean #already took a clonex and i can feel it fighting for its life to calm me down but unfortunately. my shitty brain's shittiness is stronger #anyway sorry for all the negative bullshit it's been a bad week and it's gonna be a bad month #january usually is honestly. #i mean last year i met [redacted] and they did make me want to live but! that lasted a month. so. no more will to live for me 👍 #sorry for the even more negativity #trying to keep it contained to one post at least to spare your dashboard more bullshit later tonight #...i want to know ppl don't want me gone tho. maybe. idk if that'll help. but. ugh idk how to ask for things sorry

[ahalliance]

smth about 10 being 904 yrs old in day of the doctor then 906 in the end of time fucks me up

#s2-s4 were like. fours years to him :( maybe three #and he spends at least two years running about on his own slowly withering away #those two years which are most likely post waters of mars… what if i died #and him STILL feeling horrible about how he acted in the end of time to a point where he starts breaking down in front of wilf . wtf :(( #hes just. he’s my little sad guy :( #why’d he spend a third of his 6 yr existence alone huh 😭 #i am quite literally going to be an emotional mess when the 60th specials drop like 😭 #HIM AND DONNA . back together . besties again . lord #and theyre gonna no doubt address how fucking miserable 10 was at the end of his life . #and there’s no doubt going to be a message about self acceptance and moving on . #14 is a version of 10 who has endured what he once was terrified of and lived to tell the tale . he’s a 10 who knows it was all okay in the #end #and THAT is gonna fuck me up . meow meow finally has a high chance of getting his happy end… 13 years later gotdamn #literally whatever they do ill be happy to see DT and CT acting together again im so fucking pumped #and we’re immediately getting the already banger duo of 15 and ruby right afterwards…. we’re being fucking spoiled #im so so so excited i love doctor who!! i love celebrating the future while honouring the past!! #jay rambles

[todayisafridaynight]

We’re having an emergency meeting to discuss Chris Johnson and the whitest name ever

absolutely fitting for our white man now innit

#snap chats #speaking of White People and names tho.. i drove out to barnes and noble because if i stayed at my mom's any longer id go insane #and while i was here i read the entirety of My Brother's Husband. VERY good series it was so good i loved it... #its not in my budget today to buy the whole set but maybe one day.. mike flanagan i love you you're so happy and good.. #WAIT IT GOT A LIVE ACTION SERIES ????? I HAVE TO WATCH IT LATER I WAS JUST THINKING IT'D BE GOOD AS A JDRAMA #what i did buy today tho was the second volume of The Yakuza's Bias since i loved the first one so much #and ive been PRAYING the second one'd come out soon #i also got another kirby blind box </3 its supposed to sit on your drinking glass but i didnt see who i got yet.. #i hope its not meta knight. i love meta knight but i want some variety... #im hoping its the sleeping kirby one but it was hard to hear the difference so idk #and im not checkin til later so i doont get tempted to return what i got to get a new one like a freak ☠️ #SO SAD THO when i was getting my stuff they didnt have any more butterfly bookmarks... #i always get one when i go out and sure i have more than enough bookmarks but now it feels weird... #anyway. im gonna get food i havent eaten all day... tho i did want chicken and soju later didnt i... #maybe ill just get something light here i just came here for the wifi honestly lol #god what else did i do.. OH THERE WAS THIS ONE MANGA. #i forget the full name but it had 'akane' in the title so of course i was like 'lol' and decided to read the blurb #IN THE STORY HER DAD'S NAME IS ARAKAWA ? but all of his teachers also have the surname arakawa but theyre not related #arakawa must be a ral impotrant name in the manga.... point is i lol'd #i almost wanna go back to. stopping this post now to do it LOL HANG ON BRB #AKANE-BANASHI THAT'S WHAT IT WAS CALLED and she wanted to be the best rakugo performer after her father's teacher #also named arakawa. As I Said. #failed everyone for no reason #maybe one day ill check it out.. always thought rakugo was a fine art... #anyway im rambling too much im gonna try to write a fanfic. no way in hell im drawing rgg in public LMAO #actually im gonna get food first.. as i said i havent eaten all day... ok bye #anon im so sorry if you ever read these tags LMAO I JUST LIKE TALKING ABOUT MY DAY

[illdothehotvoice]

I am begging y'all to stop trying to make UT characters interesting by making them remember resets they're already so interesting on their own i-

#i have lived through the sans fandom i was there #and i am LOVING people finally treating Papyrus good in fan content over the past few years i am!! #but if you're only way to connect to him and make him interesting to you is to just slap the same fanon traits onto him we did sans???? #idk i don't like it myself lol cxsvbfdbfd I admit if we're gonna slap that on anyone it should be Papyrus cause he does remember resets #more clearly than other characters (idk how we ever attached that to sans though maybe it's just me only seeing his no mercy dialogue later #but i think papyrus is already so cool and interesting that just boiling him down to a self loathing guy who remembers the timelines #(which. sidenote. sound familiar???) is a HUGE disservice to his character. #also i know i posted this 20 minutes ago but i wanted to add #i know this because I DID THIS as a kid fhdhdhshdhsf like vjchchxhsg i' #i'm not trying to act like a high and mighty know-it-all cjcjxhdhdg just fjdnfnsf #please read Papyrus dialogue dhdjcnd

[reel-fear]

"Well I think Nightheart is Trans" "Well I think Nightheart's character makes more sense if he had ADHD" As a trans person with ADHD neither of those ideas are canon nor justify the misogyny baked into his story and how much of an asshole he is despite being a grown ass adult + I'd rather kill all of you and myself then have to beg for the bigoted as hell Erin Hunter team of all people to give me rep. So uh, shut up <3

#ramblez #points to my we need to hunt nightheart fans for sport post again #no matter how much u Relate to a character Nightheart is never gonna see ur shitty ass posts defending him #the people who have spent YEARS trying to be heard abt the sexist themes and writing of warrior cats and who are affected by #sexism every day of their lives however will #and they will see you would rather spit on them with your shitty horrible ass fucking takes #than awknowledge your stupid fictional meow meow is a shitty ass person #nightheart fans are the new bramblestar stans/defenders pass it on <3 #delete later #maybe #just bc Im very heated-

[sukunasbabygirl]

Never listen to The Saga Begins on loop it WILL get stuck in your head all day (although this is a good thing) and you will be humming it under your breath at every chance

#pip posting #MY MY THIS HERE ANAKIN GUY #MAYBE VADER SOMEDAY LATER NOW HE’S JUST A SMALL FRY #HE LEFT HIS HOME AND KISSED HIS MOMMY GOODBYE #SAYING SOON IM GONNA BE A JEDI #SOON IM GONNA BE A JEDI #this is my descent into madness live

[heartbreakfeelsogood]

thinking about how i made a secret second ao3 just to kudos and bookmark rpf so no one that knew my ao3 would know and now i’m reblogging posts about rpf like “haha yeah me” and slowly being so much more cringe on main

#ignore me while i embarrass myself #like i do have some shame about it. however this is the cringe website and i’m gonna live my life #if i had no shame i’d write it but i don’t think i’m there yet 🫢 #if i can’t even bookmark it on my known ao3 clearly i’m not there yet </3 #it’s kinda funny to think about how i used to write much more embarrassing fanfiction (x reader 🤢) and now i’m hiding in shame #i’m debating posting this maybe i’ll draft it hit post before work and dip #op #edit: i didn’t post this before work. however i’m posting it while taking a break i think i should live my truth #if i end up deleting this later well then mind your business

[lesbicastagna]

today i started crying as i was working because i thought about a fictional character for a second too long

#a #ignore this im maybe gonna post selfies later for lesbian day im normal and regular #me when i work and i like it and im like could this be my life? And then the guy who lives in my head

[niuxita21]

My life will never be the same again hbu

#madre solo hay dos #ana servín #mariana herrera #shitty screencap posts (TM) #WHAT IN THE EARTH WIND AND FIRE is going on on this show?????? #hand to my heart I NEVER in a million years would have imagined that 1) these two would end up getting to know each other in a biblical way #but also more importantly 2) that it would happen where there are still six episodes left???? truly a game-changer lmao #I don't even know what to do with this like I wanted this for so long and the show just like... gave it to me??? #I'm about to die aren't I that's the only plausible explanation #real talk though I'm kinda relieved that it happened when they were both utterly hammered from that santa perpetua tequila (hee) #because during my week of speculation of what 'an intimate encounter' could mean #I kept going back to the fact that per the teasers and trailer we know mariana eventually moves in with ferrán #so I was kinda worried that ana would get attached and get her heart broken while mariana goes to live her best life with her boyfriend #but this way it's clear they're BOTH gonna explain it away as like 'we were super drunk it didn't really mean anything right?' #and no one's really gonna get hurt (from THIS particular turn of events I mean idk about later when mariana gets with ferrán) #so once again the show manages to do things in the LEAST annoyingly painful way possible four for you show you go show #lastly from the moment paulina's song was attached to the show I kinda hoped it would be used in a meaningful ana/mariana moment #perhaps the moment they got together for real (if that's where the show wants to take things) #but then in the past week I thought that maybe it would play over whatever the 'intimate encounter' in this episode ended up being #AND I WAS RIGHT love that for me #I also loved that from the moment we knew they went to shoot something outside of mexico city with just ana and mariana #I kinda hoped it would lead to a romantic development between them of some kind and man did I ever get more than I bargained for #started from the bottom and now we're here!!!!!!