Red Light, Green Light
pairing; CEO!jungkook x PA!reader
genre; mainly angst, smut, hints of fluff at the end, ceo au, personal assistant au
warnings; cursing, non explicit sexual activities, bdsm but not too graphic, mentions of blood, all is consensual (until it’s not), kinda like a 50 shades of gray moment tbh, reader is a sub so we getting a dom koo but he’s an asshole and reader just wants his love and attention (and so does koo but he has a roundabout way of showing it)
rating; 18+ minors dni
w/c; 10,923 this one is a doozy
a/n; taking a break from soulmate aus to whip this baby out of my drafts. was listening to “earned it” by The Weeknd and this scenario came into my head. it’s my first time writing anything pertaining to this topic, so be kind pls. like + reblog if you enjoyed. feedback is always appreciated <3
networks; @ficscafe, @thebtswritersclub, @kflixnet
You shouldn’t be here. It stood against every rational bone in your body. The same body that’s already had a taste of what’s to come, though this time it won’t be under the guise of a ‘work meeting’ in your boss’s office. No, for this special occasion, you were invited to his million dollar mansion. The Jeon Estate, where playboy and CEO ofJeon Enterprises – Jeon Jungkook, resided when he graced his workers with his presence since he took over the company from his father. Where he currently chose to specifically grace you with his presence, and more.
You honestly don’t even know how it started. One day you were a normal secretary who yeah, you’ll admit, you had a teensy crush on your boss. But you weren’t the only one. Men and women alike both shared interest in the handsome specimen of a man. His aura exuding attention and dominance whenever he walked into the room.
He was always dressed to the nines in a different custom designer suit whenever you saw him. Some of those even being dropped off for him, courtesy of yourself. Quickly and quietly you would step into his office, always getting his approval before even starting the trek to his floor. Cause yep, his office took up the entire top floor of the enlarged skyscraper that resided in Seoul, South Korea.
There was always an empty clothes rack that stood against the wall as soon as the elevator opened, where you would carefully place said suits, making sure they were evenly separated from each other. Already being yelled at for such a heinous act by his girlfriend when she witnessed the already plastic covered designer suits touching. You learned to never make that mistake again.
That was another fact that made it near impossible to get even on a friendly level with the CEO; his girlfriend. Sun-Yee was the epitome of perfection, but she had an ugly heart. Seriously, even Jungkook had his albeit rare, soft moments where he would give you a genuine thank you in gratitude for all your hard work. Those simple words igniting the fire in you to work harder to always stay in his line of sight amongst the thousands of other workers that resided on your floor.
So imagine, to your utmost surprise and delight, when his last personal assistant got fired for reasons unknown, and it was you he chose to be his new one. The power you felt when you walked into your enclosed office, rather than just another open cubicle, was indescribable. However, there was whispers that always floated around the office workers. Talks of what the young CEO liked to do as a hobby, both outside of work and during a certain mysterious block of hours that were always blacked out for him on a daily basis where he refused to take calls, clients, or meetings. Supposedly, he never left his office during those hours. And rather, there was always someone seen going in, to not come back out until the hours were over. That was all hearsay, a myth, an urban legend, until it happened to you.
One day, it was you he sent for to come into his office during those blacked out hours. And it was only then did you realize a whole different side to your boss. At first, he claimed it was just a chance to get to know his workers better, have a little ‘one on one’ time without the interruptions of the usual work day. And that’s exactly what happened the next two times he called you back in. You both got to know each other more personally, and it made you feel as if you finally made it to the friendship level in your work relationship. Dare you say, there was even moments of him flirting with you.
It was after the third meeting, did things take a sudden, sinful, turn. Not that you were complaining. Moreso, you were wantonly moaning. But only after agreeing to signing a very detailed contract. And that’s when you knew each other not just on a personal level, but an intimate one as well.
This went on for the better part of the year, him even taking you on a few out of office dates, and even though one of the many rules he had was never to catch feelings for him, you did, obviously. It didn’t help that on one of those public dates he decided to kiss you, which only fueled your innate feelings. You were only human after all. Feelings you always kept in and never showed except when your limbs were entangled and the tears of longing that ran down your face could be hid under the pretense of being euphorically overstimulated. If he ever got the sense you were falling for him, he never showed it.
When he broke up with his girlfriend, you had glutton laced hope that maybe he did it to be with you, exclusively. Except, the conversation of topic wasn’t ever brought up. And when your year mark hit, you didn’t even get one call or text from him. Sure, you didn’t technically have a label, but you thought you meant more to him than an essential booty call. You guessed wrong.
It wouldn’t be until three months later of you just doing your regular personal assistant duties at work, did you get summoned back to his office. With an exhausted sigh, you had no choice but to listen to your bosses orders and meet up with him. Not one to address the elephant in the room, you chose not to say anything of your previous sexual activities, and opted for the polite and professional ‘what can I do for you, sir’.
And thus, you were invited to join him for the evening at his 23.5 million dollar mansion, a fact you looked up due to pure curiosity and to busy yourself during the eerily silent car ride in the black, sleek, limo he sent for you to your house to be picked up. Requesting you dress in cocktail attire, you had to call up your best friend and raid her closet to wear something even close to what he had in mind. Cause other than the bleak, but comfortable, business attire you donned at work, all that was in your closet was casual and laidback clothing fitting for a single woman who was still paying off her student loan debt for the next 30 years. Basically, she was your lifesaver, and how it was possible for you to be wearing a black, body hugging, lace, bustier cocktail dress.
———————————————————————
High, thick, concrete walls that connected to an equally as high and thick automatic gate is what greeted you upon the arrival to just the entrance to the mansion. The driver signaled to the security guard station that was located on the side of the gate in order to monitor who comes and goes in the mansion for Jungkook’s safety. The security then pressed the magic button that thrust the gates wide open with ease and the limo resumed on it’s course up the long, scenic driveway that lead to the main doors of the mansion.
Once the car pulls to a stop in front of the mansion, you could hear the driver get out of the car. Assuming he was about to open your car door, you waited. Seconds later, the door is pulled open, but it’s not by the limo driver, it’s by Jeon Jungkook himself. Your eyes widened considerably at his sudden appearance, looking as elegant as always. He held his hand out to you with a knowing smirk, ready to help you out of the limo. Stepping out carefully onto the black asphalt, you held his hand tightly as leverage before letting go to stand up straight in front of him.
His eyes are locked on yours. There is an eerie calm in his demeanor that makes your pulse quicken. The subtle grin on his lips tells you not to be fooled by the quiet. It’s the silence before the predator strikes his prey. You see him look you over carefully and hungrily as he takes a step closer. He opens his mouth to speak and his voice is low and gravelly.
“Well, don’t you look ravishing, love.”
Your cheeks feel warm and your heart skips a beat. You suddenly feel as if the air around you has become much warmer, even on the blistery cool night it was only a second before his use of both the compliment and the pet name that didn’t go unnoticed by you.
“Shall we?” He offered his arm to you like a true gentleman, but you knew otherwise. Still, you took the offered arm in kind with a polite smile as he guided you both up the stairs and through the large front doors that were currently being held open by staff help, you could only assume.
Upon entering the foyer of the mansion, he continued to lead you up another flight of stairs that led you to his private wing where he said you could moan and scream in privacy. A cheeky smile plastered on his face as he leaned in to whisper the lewd thought into your exposed ear from wearing your hair in an updo.
It was a couple of more minutes of walking through a maze of hallways before he stilled both your movements in front of a plain, black door. In fact, upon surveying your surroundings since stepping inside, you have yet to see another door like it. This must be the only one. A thought that made you tilt your head in wonder, but you didn’t voice it out loud. Least, not until you see the key he fishes out of his pocket for you to see.
“Is this your room?” You ask inquisitively, tight smile on your face. Your heart was dreading what your body anticipated.
Jungkook let’s out a small chuckle and grins widely. He walks slowly closer to you, his eyes roaming over your body unabashedly. It was in this moment, that you truly did feel like his prey.
“Like what you see, sir?” You smirked at him, using his preferred choice of naming that normally gets him frazzled.
When he gets close, he moves around to your side, as though getting a view of all your angles. You don’t see him, but you hear him let out a soft grunt of approval before he steps closer to you, now taking the position of being behind you.
You can feel him behind you, the electricity of the close proximity buzzing through your body and hitting you in waves. You hear him breathe you in deeply. Savoring your scent and letting it wash over him. The lightest groan could be heard falling from his lips as he exhaled, barely audible, but you caught it within the silence of the hallway.
“Yes.” The delayed reply came with a drawn out ‘s’ sound at the end.
All of a sudden he pressed his soft lips against your shoulder as his hands came to rest on the curve of your hips. His lips slowly hovered over your skin, trailing up to the base of your neck, where he chooses to plant his next kiss. You can feel the warmth of his breath on your skin and it sends a delightful chill through you.
Not another sound has been made as you then feel one of his hands reach around your front to your chest. He leaves another kiss on your neck. The hand that rose to your chest, now outlined the curve of your breast sensually on it’s way to trail up your collarbone. Reaching it’s end destination, large hand lightly curving around the side of your throat with ease, his lips place yet another kiss on your skin. The other hand that’s on your hip, grips your waist more tightly.
With another deep inhalation of your aroma, he squeezes your throat so lightly, you could barely feel it. Holding it for just a moment, he lets his hand fall from your neck and moves from his position behind you, effectively letting you free from his snake like grip that did nothing but entrance you into your submissive state.
Standing back in front of you, he gently places one hand on your cheek with a soft, sincere look on his face and a question on his lips.
“Are you ready?”
“Yes, sir.” You reply back instantly.
Jungkook holds your gaze for a moment and sucks his bottom lip between his teeth. He reaches down to unlock the door with one hand, the other grabbing your hand to lead you in once he pushes it open. Walking through the threshold, you were surrounded by an aura the room held within it’s closed doors. There was no doubt in your mind, this was his playroom.
———————————————————————
You recall the stoplight system he uses. Green to keep going, yellow to slow down or be careful, and red for a full stop. You repeated the rules like a mantra in your head, not realizing that Jungkook has long since shut the door behind your bodies and was now trying to talk with you. Blinking yourself out of your stupor, did your ears seem to start working again as you shyly asked him to repeat himself one more time.
On the bed you can see three decorative boxes, clearly gifts for someone. He looks at you, smiling widely, and gestures towards the boxes.
“I told you that I wanted you to have something that could be your own in this space. In each box is something you might enjoy using during our time together.” He patiently reiterated for a second time.
“Oh! Really?” You asked unbelieving. Maybe he does this ritual for every girl he brings into his playroom, you rationalized in your head.
He opens the various boxes for you and invites you to take a look inside them. In the first box are red ropes. In the second box is a pair of black, leather cuffs bound together by a short chain. In the third box is a black, satin blindfold with ribbon accents around the edging.
“You choose whichever one you would like, and it’s yours.” He vowed to you solemnly.
Why did this oddly feel like leaving a toothbrush at your boyfriend’s house? The only difference being he isn’t your boyfriend, and his idea of a toothbrush is a sex toy of your choosing. Your mind reeled with unspoken questions while your heart started fluttering with the possibility of this endeavor meaning something more to him than just a booty call.
Is it possible that he was catching feelings too?
Leaning down to reach into the box, you chose to go for the black, satin blindfold. The simplicity and allure drawing itself to you. You couldn’t wait to experience what kind of pleasure this material would bring you. More specifically, what he would bring you wearing it.
Once again you got lost in your thoughts while holding the blindfold in the palm of your hand delicately. The fabric is luxurious and soft against your skin. During your inner lewd daydreams, Jungkook took it upon himself to walk into the connecting bathroom in the room to undress until he was in nothing but his underwear.
Minutes later he returns, thoroughly disrobed, and grins at your selection of choice.
“Have you made your decision, baby?”
His voice breaks you from your daydream, as you subtly nod your head at him in response, eyes showing no remorse as they trail over the beautiful, nearly nude, male in front of you. Now you suddenly felt overdressed.
Jungkook holds his hand out for you to give the blindfold to him. He looks you over with eager anticipation and gives you a wide smile.
“Ready to begin?” He asks in a sultry voice that has your toes curling in your heels.
“Yes, I’m ready.” You replied, not realizing your mistake. His eyes narrowed.
“Colors next time. Green. Yellow. Red.” He annunciated each color in a clear and concise voice so you understood. You nodded and this time you replied back correctly.
“Green.”
———————————————————————
Jungkook smiles softly at you. He steps around behind you and covers your eyes with the blindfold, positioning it carefully before tying it tightly against your head. He lets his hands caress the sides of your neck for a moment, letting each hand run its own course along the tops of your shoulders and then moves around to stand back in front of your now sightless figure. You feel him take your hands in his.
Without any kind of warning, he immediately pulls you in so close you could feel the body head that radiates from him, as his lips meet yours in a kiss. The kisses are slow and sensual at first, but become more intense and needier with each touch of his traveling hands. You feel his hands find place on your hips as he carefully guides your body backwards still kissing you. Deprived of your sight, you relaxed your body to let him lead you without trouble.
Feeling your back touch a wall, you let out a soft grunt in the kiss. Jungkook uses the opportunity of the new position to press his body against yours. His kisses are deep and his tongue slithers into your mouth with expertise, mingling with yours. You let out a soft moan as you kiss him, the sound eliciting a response in him in a way of tilting his head to kiss you more deeply, his hands gripping onto you tightly to the point of slight pain, but still mostly pleasure.
Due to the close proximity, you can feel how his heart is beating against your clothed breast. He angles his hips before pressing them towards you and you can feel exactly how much he’s enjoying the make out session so far, his length prominent behind the thin underwear he’s still wearing. He then abruptly breaks the kiss, which has your submissive side whining in disappointment.
His body heat fades from yours as he steps back and away from you, but you still stay leaning against the wall since he hasn’t told you to move. Still unable to see, you can hear him shuffling around within the room. Even with his absence, you can still smell the alluring musk of his cologne in the air and it’s dizzying.
A moment later, you hear the sound of his feet padding towards you, before he pivots at the last moment he would’ve made contact with your body, and places an unknown object onto the nightstand you know is located a few paces somewhere close to where you stood against the wall. Your body flinches at the sudden onslaught of his hands on your body once more, his lips coming in a barrage of lip bruising precision. His hands then begin the arduous process of removing your clothes while finding strategic ways to break the kiss as little as possible.
Soon, you feel nothing but air hit your body as you stand in nothing but the blindfold still tightly secured around your eyes, nothing but black filling your vision. He places a delicate kiss on your now bare shoulder with a tenderness that has you inwardly keening at his soft nature coming out for you only.
Then you feel something cold, an ice cube, you conclude. Your nipples instantly hardened at the abrupt coldness, goosebumps now littering your skin all over. He alternated between tantalizingly rubbing the ice cube on various parts of your body, to then take it away and replace the cold spot with soft, warm kisses. Between those kisses he asked a question.
“Green?”
“Green.” You breathlessly echoed.
Once you could only assume the ice cube fully melted from your body heat alone, did he calculatingly place one of his arms behind your knee and one behind your back to scoop you up into his arms in a bridal style hold. You let out a quiet gasp at the sudden action.
Gently he laid you down on the silk sheets of the bed and hovering over you with one arm supporting him, he reached over to the nightstand to grab another ice cube. Continuing the cold assault on your body, he kept switching in between rubbing the ice cube on multiple parts of your body and planting precise soft, warm, open mouthed kisses on the once cold areas. Your back arching underneath him due to his ministrations, little mewls could be heard falling from your lips.
He licks up the drops of water as they start trailing down your body. The ice play and Jungkook’s skilled tongue elicit moans of pleasure from you, particularly when he gives his full attention to more sensitive parts of your body. The longer you play, the more you feel as though Jungkook is on autopilot. Every touch is calculated and needy as he seeks refuge in your body. With each change of position and play his touch becomes more rough.
His body climbs further up yours as he effectively traps you underneath his body, leaning down to kiss you deeply. With one of his hands he pins your wrists above your head still kissing you. You feel him pull back slightly as you feel his teeth playfully bite into your bottom lip a little too hard, the unwarranted action causing you to gasp into the little space between your faces. He doesn’t let up, pinning your wrists harder into the bed with his grip tightening around them.
His lips leave kisses as they trail down your chin to the base of your neck, where his teeth decide to make another showing. The sharp pinch and suction on your skin is harder than you expected, and it hurts. Not wanting to ruin the mood, however, you kept your lips pursed tightly. Even though the word ‘yellow’ wanted to make it’s way out of your mouth in a small plea.
His pacing doesn’t change as he switches his assault on your body to one where his hands were continuously moving and grasping all parts of your body aggressively, the gentle side of him long gone. His mouth and tongue ravished your body, him wanting to get a taste of every inch of you. His whole demeanor screamed rough and possessive.
A slight whimper made it’s way up your throat and through your still pursed lips. Yet you steeled your resolve, selfishly hoping that any minute he would change back to the gentle Jungkook you once knew, and unfortunately and consequently, you were still in love with.
Seemingly out of nowhere, cause it was, to you, he uses his sheer upper body strength once he sits back up on his knees, to flip your body over, resulting in you now being face down in the pillows with your bare back and ass in plain view for him. You mistakenly thought he was doing this to give you a gentle, pleasurable, back massage. Once again, you were wrong.
He hungrily kisses, licks, sucks, and bites all over the newly exposed skin that has yet to feel his wrath. His hands roughly grasped your hips, your ass, everything. Mimicking his previous position, he once again grasps your wrists in his one large hand to press them down into the bed. Your head was now facing sideways, resting on the upper part of your arm in an attempt to get some air into your lungs, breaths coming out in sharp pants. With his tight grip on your wrists, he slid his chest down the length of your back until you could feel his breath fan over your bare ass cheek, his other arm stretched out over your legs to unknowingly keep your body in place, not at all prepared for the wave of pain you were about to feel. You even half expected him to ask you for what color you’re currently feeling before he makes his move. Nope. Not this time, apparently.
His teeth sunk harshly and without remorse into the flesh of your hip, the only surprise for you being his target which you thought was going to be your ass cheek. Wrong, wrong, wrong. It should be your new mantra in life.
A searing pain burns at your hip and there is no doubt in your mind that he’s drawn blood.
———————————————————————
“What the actual fuck, Jungkook?”
Your high pitched scream and question cut through the now humid air that was caused by your heated bodies. Roughly tugging yourself out of his iron grip on your wrists, you tugged the blindfold up enough to see Jungkook. A look of murder was on your face from the painful action, your hip now throbbing from the male’s assault.
What you didn’t realize was that Jungkook was still stuck in his dominating persona, and you just broke a major rule by not using the stoplight code.
Jungkook doesn’t say a word to you as he releases you from his grip fully, face blank from emotion, as he lifts himself up off the bed to stand back on his feet. His figure striding over towards an array of toys that hung on the far wall in plain view with a newfound purpose. He just stands there for a second with his back towards you, pondering, when he slowly and delicately picks a riding crop up off one of the many shelves that were lined up in rows on the wall.
When he looks at you next, his gaze is cold. This isn’t the warm look your encounter started with, as the supposedly playful bites that were already painting bruises on your skin, stung painfully.
Something feels off. Something feels wrong.
Deciding that you were finally done, you carefully untie and remove his gift. The blindfold now free from it’s once tight grip around your head, and toss it in front of you on the bed. You shuffle yourself off the bed, being careful not to bump any of your now very prominent forming bruises that littered your body in a grotesque painting. Mustering up what dignity you had left, you stood at the side of the bed with a straight back and stared at Jungkook.
Jungkook now eyes the blindfold on the bed with a steely gaze, standing directly in front of the bed in a stiff manner, hand holding the riding crop in a death grip, his knuckles turning white. He saunters over to your now standing form to stand directly in front of you instead.
“I didn’t tell you to take it off, did I?” His voice pierced through the room in a tone void of emotion. You couldn’t believe those were the first words he was going to say to you after everything that just happened. Your hand twitched from its spot that hovered near your now aching hip.
It all happened so quick, it was like a blur, as if your mind already wanted to erase this whole scenario from your mind before it even began. With fast and precise movements, Jungkook grabs your wrist and turns you around to face the bed. He lets go of your wrist only to press it harshly against your lower back, the action resulting in you now being bent over for him, your upper body landing on the bed with your ass still up in the air. It was the perfect position for his next move. You should’ve expected it at this point, but naively, you didn’t. That was your mistake. Though, least you can say you tried.
“Jungkook, wait, don’t— STOP!”
With a sharp twist of his wrist, Jungkook makes a fatal hit on your bare ass. A loud ‘SMACK’ could be heard reverberate through the room from the contact of the riding crop hitting your skin. Your whole body being pushed forward from the sheer force of the hit. Not wanting to make the same mistake twice you finally said the correct code word. Or rather, you screamed it.
“RED! RED! RED!”
You’re in tears. Them falling immediately after the riding crop left your now red, sore, skin. Jungkook says nothing, but to your relief, he also doesn’t continue.
“This isn’t like you.” The words coming out of your mouth in a watery mess, your body now curled in on itself, your legs being pulled up on the bed fully, as you now took the fetal position. Suddenly, you felt overexposed.
As though being broken from a trance, your comment made his cold demeanor crack as his eyes widened. His breathing is hard and you can tell his adrenaline has been pumping. It wasn’t until you finally gained enough strength to pick your wrecked and sore body off the bed to gather your things and get dressed in record breaking time, did his facial expression change. You can physically see the array of emotion’s pass by on his face, it’s as if he doesn’t even fully understand what just transpired in his own body himself.
Gathering your courage, you decided that you would not let this situation break you. And instead, you were going to stand up for yourself for once. Feelings be damned. You didn’t want to be with someone in any way, shape, or form, if they could so willing do something like this to you without restraint.
“This wasn’t what we agreed to.” You started your little speech in a calm, cold manner. Jungkook was getting ready to open his mouth and spew some kind of bullshit for you to forgive him. You raised your hand up in front of his face to stop him. You were not going to let him have the chance.
“Green. Yellow. Or red. I don’t fucking care–“ you emphasized in a now loud tone.
“If I say stop, YOU STOP!” You yelled the last words in his face, eyes ablaze with a fury he’s never seen on you wear before. It makes him feel even worse than he already does.
Stepping back away from him, to give yourself some distance from the male before you do something you regret, you let out an exhausted and shaky sigh. Your own adrenaline starting to come down from the weight of the words that just came out of your mouth. Man, you just wanted a warm bath and to snuggle into your equally warm, safe, bed.
Jungkook seems conflicted and confused. But he respects your distance and doesn’t move an inch towards you. He quickly grabs his clothes from the bathroom, but instead of getting dressed in there, he opts to stand in the same position in front of you as before, not wanting you to leave without him knowing.
He dresses to the best of his ability while still standing up. His eyes meet yours for a brief moment, but he says nothing and looks away. ‘What a coward’, you thought inwardly in disgust. All he does is trek his way to the entrance of the room, where he opens it for you. Not wasting a second more, you hurriedly step through the threshold and make your way down the same path you took to get here, except now you were leaving. Jungkook surprisingly doesn’t go to follow you, as if his body is still in shock over it’s misuse of someone so precious to them, you.
You make your way down the main grand staircase that leads to the foyer and the two, large, grandiose doors that will be your escape from this mansion. The staff held them open for you patiently, as if Jungkook already told them you were leaving somehow. Sure enough, as soon as you stepped foot into the outside air, there was already the same black limo idly waiting for your arrival to drive you back home. The driver held the door open for you as you climbed into the backseat. Stealing a glance back towards the mansion as the car drove off, you looked through the back, tinted window. You saw Jungkook standing where the car was prior on the black asphalt. His chest heaving, mouth open, and a look of regret and sorrow was painted on his face, as if he made a last minute decision to chase after you. His attempt was futile. You were already gone. And you never looked back again.
———————————————————————
A letter of resignation would be found on his office desk in the morning when he would sit down in his chair. Hands holding the paper so carefully, a look of heartbreak resting on his face at the name signed at the bottom.
Your name.
Slamming the paper down on the desk with both hands, he stood up in his chair, the force of him kicking it back with his foot hard enough to clatter on the floor behind him. His rage not yet satiated, he made a big swiping motion with his hands and arms as he made all his belongings on the clear, glass desk fly into the air before harshly landing in a pile of nonsense on the dark, marble flooring.
Still standing, his head was down, with his hair shielding his face. His knuckles clutched tightly on the glass desk turning white, his nails digging into the palms of his hands that was painful, but he didn’t care. It was nothing compared to the pain he brought you, albeit, it was never intended to get that far. He would forever regret the way he treated you, someone he very closely came to loving. But as always, he had to fuck up the one good thing in his life.
Tears splattered on the clear desk in a continuous pattern as his shoulders shook with the quiet sobs he held in so others couldn’t hear.
He couldn’t appear weak,
he was the CEO after all.
But that didn’t mean he wasn’t ready to fight for you with all he had.
———————————————————————
Starting your new job at a different firm wasn’t easy. You were so used to the ways of your old place of work, your coworkers, your boss. It was difficult trying to find a new routine, but after a couple of months, you finally found one. You weren’t necessarily happy, but you were content. And that was better than nothing.
Jungkook hasn’t tried contacting you since you resigned. And as much as you wanted to completely cut him off from your life for good, you still found yourself looking at articles that pertained to the young, handsome, successful CEO. Though, there were some concerns about certain businesses he was in charge of that had to do with shareholders? You’re not entirely sure what it all means, not majoring in business yourself, but the fancy charts in the article that show drastic highs and lows must mean it’s not anything good.
And of course, you stalked his social media accounts. To your utmost surprise, there hasn’t been any racy pictures of him with other women since after you left. In fact, other than a few pictures of him with respectable business women where he kept a polite distance with a trained smile, there wasn’t any others. None. As if he took the time to delete each and every one from all his social media accounts. But why would he go through the hassle of something like that? To try and create a better image of himself for future investment opportunities? That had to be it, you thought rationally.
Cause surely, it wasn’t because of you.
You scoffed at the preposterous thought that wormed itself into your head. Wearing your comfy pajama set, you scooped another spoonful of ice cream that ended up in your mouth. Humming in content over the creamy goodness, you frowned upon realizing that was the last bite. Just as you were about to get up and throw the carton away, there was three, loud, consecutive knocks on your front door.
Stopping in your tracks, you stilled. Maybe they were knocking on the wrong door? After a few minutes of you still not answering the door, the persistent knocks continued for another three raps. Furrowing your eyebrows you decided to just open the door and steer them in the right direction.
What you didn’t expect, was for Jeon Jungkook of all people to be standing in a for once, casual outfit of choice, as if he was trying to blend in with the surrounding people. In fact, it seemed like his whole persona has changed. He has a new haircut and style, new piercings on his face that weren’t there before, and even some tattoos on his once bare skin. To say you were shocked, would be an understatement. You’ll admit, it just makes him even more irresistible. Much to your dismay.
“I believe I owe you an apology. May I come in, y/n?”
You stared at him like he had two heads. Was he serious?
“You’re serious? It’s been like, three months, Jungkook! Not that I was keeping count or anything–,” you started off strong, then gradually fell into your word vomit. His lip gave a subtle quirk, as he tried not to smile at your adorable rambling, lip piercing slightly moving with the sudden gesture.
“You’re right.” He began, making you cross your arms in pride that he agreed with you for once. “It’s been three months, one week, and four days. And yes, I was keeping track.” He stated the exact amount of time so casually, no hint of being embarrassed about it at all on his face. Your mouth dropped open as your eyes widened comically. He was serious. Oh, shit.
Okay. Okay. Okay. You repeated in your head as you cautiously opened the door wider and moving off to the side to give him room to walk inside your small, dingy, but comfortable home. You just hoped he wouldn’t rip you a new one at your choice of living. Or your interior design. The afterthought coming after you not so subtly shut the door quickly behind him, and raced by him into the living room to inspect what damage you’ve done this evening with your recent pity party of one. It looked decent, thankfully. And you mentally patted yourself on the back for that one.
Choosing to sit on the lazy boy recliner that could only fit one, you strategically created a good amount of distance between you two as he sat on the loveseat that was adjacent to you. Curling your legs underneath you, you tugged the throw blanket that was hanging off the back of the chair in pure decoration, and threw it over the lower half of your body. Tucking it up underneath your arms, you were sure the blanket was thoroughly secured and risked looking up into Jungkook’s face for the first time since you opened the door. Time to get this conversation over with.
“So,” you started, drawing out the ‘o’ sound, “–about that apology? You owe me a lot more than that.” As an afterthought, you added a sly, “I got home just fine, by the way.” A morose smile was on your face, a sure fire way of letting him know you were being sarcastic.
His face was still stoic, eyes just continuing to stare into your soul. If it wasn’t for you watching him so closely, you would’ve missed the slight twitch that occurred with his now pierced eyebrow. He forgot just how feisty you could be, a stark reminder that you were much different from his previous relationships.
One of the many reasons he did end up falling for you in the time you spent together, you being none the wiser. Not that he explicitly showed he was interested in you more than just what was written in the contract. His mind always won over his heart when it came to business. But now he saw things in a new light since you’ve been gone, he was a completely changed man, for the most part.
“That’s good to hear.” He gave you a small, genuine smile. When it came to your safety, it was always his top priority. It wasn’t something to joke about. He understood that much.
“I’m sorry our evening ended like it did.” The smile now wiped from his face completely, eyes full of sorrow, the events of that night swirling in his head like a reel of old film. It haunted him to this day, him still not fully knowing how he let himself go so carelessly. It’s like he completely blacked out after a certain extent of your activities, losing himself to his dominant side that he thought he had control over by now. He was wrong, it seems. “I shouldn’t have put you in that position. And I am very glad that you made it home safely, y/n.”
Your face started to turn into one of sympathy for the male, the feeling behind his words seeming real. Or, so you thought. Until he uttered the next words from his mouth that made your face contort into one of disbelief.
“I thought you understood what you were getting into though.”
You scoffed out loud at him.
“Seriously? You treated me like a one night stand you could hurt to make yourself feel better!” The words rushed out of your mouth in a clipped tone. Your body leaning forward from the weight of the words.
He held his hands up in defense, worried you might get up at any moment to pummel into him with your tiny, yet still equally as dangerous, fists of fury when you were upset enough. Another reason he fell for you, your strength and being able to stand up for yourself.
“That wasn’t my intention, I assure you…,” he trailed off, deep in thought, his gaze on you turning into one of resolve and clarity. “Maybe you still aren’t quite ready for this lifestyle. You should have said ‘red’ sooner.”
An unladylike snort made it’s way out of your nose from the surprising comment. This guy, you thought with a click of your tongue, shaking your head in mock sadness for the male in front of you. He still didn’t understand what an apology was, or what it meant for that matter. Clearly, he believes that he did nothing wrong that night. A heavy feeling settled itself into your stomach where butterflies used to once flutter for Jungkook. And now they were all dead.
“Jesus fucking Christ!” You threw up your hands in frustration, head thrown back into the chair as you stared up at the blank white ceiling before settling your sights back on the perfect example of what a privileged man looks like.
“Are you kidding me right now?!” Your voice cracked from the sudden high pitch in tone. “This isn’t something that I’ve,“ you pointed at yourself, emphasizing. “–done wrong, Jungkook!”
“I suppose that makes sense…,” he once again trailed off, unphased by your outburst and theatrics, shrugging his shoulders in a nonchalant way. It pissed you off to no end. How the hell did you waste a better part of over a year on this guy? You must’ve been blinded by love.
“MAKES SENSE?!”
Your body shifted as if you were about to stand up, which you were, from the amount of rage you were currently experiencing with your whole body. The throw blanket being thrown off your lap haphazardly without a care. The subtle action making Jungkook instantly jump up from his position on the couch to now stand behind the couch he was sitting on prior, using it as a makeshift shield. He was smart, sometimes.
Assuming the position of defense, he once again held his hands up in front of him, fingers splayed out as extra protection, you could only guess, before wisely spewing the rest of his thoughts out loud that will hopefully ward you off and have you change your mind about attempting to murder him.
“Y/N, wait! Listen to me for just a moment!” He pleaded with you desperately. Now standing up yourself, you took one step towards him as he took one step back.
“You’re right.” He led with the phrase that made you stare at him questioningly. Your head tilted to the side as your arms crossed over your chest. Foot tapping impatiently on the ground, you gestured with one of your hands for him to continue. He had your attention. He better not waste it.
“I was in the wrong here. I should have checked in. Just because you didn’t use a safe word doesn’t mean that you were doing okay. It truly is on me. I have not been a good dom to you.” Your face lost it’s anger, now turning into one of astonishment as you focused on the words that fell from his mouth. “It’s inexcusable, and I would understand if you considered it unforgivable as well.” Your arms now unfolded to flop uselessly by your sides as you stood up straighter. “If you want to end it here and now, I wouldn’t blame you for it. Though, I guess you kind of did already..” his voice got smaller, the fact making his heart feel heavy. But despite his tone, he gained the courage to walk around the couch to stand in front of you a few feet away. His hands were fisted at his sides as he mustered up the strength to properly finish his speech. “But I will ask, selfishly, that you give me another chance.”
“We don’t even want the same things.” You fired out the fact with an exasperated tone. Your body sagged, suddenly feeling exhausted from this whole conversation.
“I understand that.” He stated, just as matter of fact. It made your eyebrows furrow in confusion. If he understood, why was he still so adamant to get back together with you?
“I don’t know what’s going on, but you’re all over the place! You told me before all this happened that you just might consider taking me out on dates, exclusively, with a title. That’s why I decided to meet you at your house that day, even though my mind was telling me otherwise. But then that date suddenly turned into another one of your sessions.” The passionate explanation was the last straw for your worn out body as you resolved to sitting back down in the comfort of the lazy chair, not being able to support the own weight of your body anymore. Your head fell into your hands as your palms rubbed into your eyes viciously, trying to cease the onslaught of tears that wanted to spill out.
Jungkook dropped to his knees in front of your sitting figure, not caring about how his knees might bruise from the sudden impact, his height now matching yours as he gently grabbed both of your hands to pull them away from your face. In response, you turned your head to the side to try and hide the fact that you couldn’t succeed in stopping the tears from coming out. It broke his heart, a lump of his own starting to form in the back of his throat that he cleared before continuing to speak, now in a soft, gentle, tone.
“I know, I’m so sorry, y/n.” He released his grip on your wrists one large hand, opting for holding both of yours in a firm, but gentle grip. The other rising to caress the side of your face that’s turned away from him, slowly moving your face forward towards him so he could look you in the eyes with what he says next. He wants you to know he means every word.
“I wish I could explain away my actions, but that would be disingenuous even if outside factors are affecting me.”
“You’re right about that.” You mumbled under your breath bitterly, now looking into his big, brown, doe eyes you love.
“Is there anything I can do to begin to fix us? I don’t want to lose you, as much as I deserve to.” His eyes glistened with a watery sheen to them. You clutched onto his hand with yours, the one that was still caressing your face with utmost care. Your heart was starting to resurface for the lonely male. But, you inwardly decided, this would be his one and only chance under one condition.
“Tell me what’s really going on, or I’m out. I mean it, Jungkook.” You squeezed the hand that was holding yours in emphasis.
Letting out a breath he didn’t know he was holding as he waited for your next words, he nodded determinedly, albeit with a little hesitation. He’s never been one to express his emotions so vividly. The whole vulnerable side being new to him entirely. He never even got like this with his previous partners. His feelings having never run this deep for anyone before.
“When I first started talking to you, I found myself quickly enamored with you in a way I hadn’t felt in a long time. I found myself sharing details of my life I hadn’t spoken about in years. I was telling you about my dreams. You were in my dreams!” He rubbed the side of your face with his thumb, eyes wide with a small smile making an appearance on his face. “You made me feel so normal. Not once did you treat me differently for my money. It was like I could live this other life around you. It was–,” his voice quieted, his eyes searching yours for something unknown to you, but he let out a shaky exhale as he continued with his spiel, his voice now sounding breathless. “–intoxicating. It made me want to lavish you. I fell so fucking hard for you, y/n.”
His end confession didn’t go unnoticed from your ears, but you knew this wasn’t the time to expand on that subject quite yet. So, you asked a logical question back at him, even more confused with what he wanted than before he started talking.
“So, what happened?”
“I broke my own rules so quickly. I took you out on that date and kissed you in front of everyone. It was everything I swore I wouldn’t do again….but I loved it.” He chuckled to himself humorlessly. “And then I had to leave you. By the time the plane landed in Paris where my meeting was being held, the news of us had spread like wildfire. The mergers came out at the worst time. Speculation began that I was being a playboy, focusing less on business and more on pleasure. The stocks dropped. The shareholders panicked.” There was a slight pause in his rambling where you were able to chime in your thoughts.
“That doesn’t sound good.” You quietly spoke in between the negative space shared between your bodies.
“So, yes, I did have to handle my father’s estate while I was out of town. I also then worked around the clock to satisfy the shareholders and keep their confidence high in my abilities.”
“I can’t imagine having to deal with those at the same time.” You grimaced at the thought, knowing if you were in Jungkook’s shoes, they would definitely be a heavy pair to fill.
“It’s all settled for now. Not without several sleepless nights trying to figure it all out, of course.”
He waved his free hand into the air nonchalantly, his face sporting a small grin. His playful side making a rare appearance right in front of your eyes. The sight making those butterflies start kicking up in your stomach, before you harshly swallowed them down to nothing.
“What was so hard to sort out?” You inquired curiously, head tilting into his hand subconsciously.
“I couldn’t let you go.” He said casually. Not an ounce of him lying could be heard in his voice or in his facial expression.
You? So it was your fault? That made no sense.
“All of this,” you gestured wildly with your arms in the space around you, using the air as a metaphor for all the chaos in Jungkook’s world, “is over me?” Your eyebrows raised into your hairline in question.
“Does that really surprise you?” His eyebrows mimicked yours in response. “I’ve shared things with you that I wouldn’t dream of letting other people know about. Despite how hard I’ve worked to keep my walls up, you–,” he booped your nose softly with the tip of his finger, “–knock them down effortlessly.” He gave you a lopsided grin.
Damnit, those stupid butterflies were back with a vengeance.
“So, I made myself believe that if our only connection was the contract, I could balance everything again. I could have everything scheduled, and I could still see you.”
You leaned backwards into the chair, effectively breaking the contact with his hands and ran your hands through your hair as you exhaled a sigh. Splaying your hands on your stomach, your new position was one of exhaustion and laziness. You eyes him warily, eyes narrowed with more questions that needed answers.
He sat in front of you, patiently, but now he sat at your feet on the floor. His height not changing much from the new position. Must be nice, you thought enviously with your genetically short statured body. Your height was another factor that made Jungkook want to keep you all to himself. It made you more irresistible in his eyes.
“Why would this affect your businesses?”
Jungkook mindlessly poked his tongue out to play with his lip ring as he tilted his head to the side, inwardly debating on how to put his response into the correct words, an action that made you swallow your own saliva that seemed to build up quickly out of nowhere causing you to choke on your own spit for a second. The sound not going unnoticed by Jungkook as his sharp gaze zeroed in on you with a look of concern. You waved your hands at him in response in a silent ‘I’m good’, not wanting to explain what warranted the choking to occur. How embarrassing would that be? Your cheeks flushed at the would be explanation.
Deeming that you’re okay and not spontaneously dying in front of him, he wrapped his arms around his bent knees as his back now leaned against your mahogany coffee table. Playing with one of the various rings that adorned his hands, he attempted an explanation you could understand.
“The easiest way I can explain it is that rivals will look for anything that’s a perceived weakness to get rumors buzzing. A wonderful date was twisted into an accused source of distraction from cranking out shareholder profits. Which is exactly why I try to keep things in my life as private as possible.”
When you didn’t offer any comments, he did a lip trill with his lips before proceeding. His voice wavered with deep emotion playing across his face you couldn’t quite decipher.
“What I’m saying is I made a mistake, y/n. I thought I could arrange things like I used to. But I made a mistake.” He repeated the line with a sense of urgency, hoping you would pick up on it so you understood him. You did. “You’re not like anyone I’ve ever met before.” He looked downcast, defeated, vulnerable. Nothing like the CEO persona you were used too, but maybe moreso it was a hint at the real Jungkook. Your Jungkook.
“Do you even know what you want?” You questioned in a tired tone. Feeling like you’ve more than beat that specific question dead. But so far, it seems to have been looked over by the male, like he was trying to avoid it, and you were done waiting.
“And I still don’t understand why the tabloids would be focused on me at all. I’m a nobody. A wallflower. A face in the crowd. A background character. A homebody. Whenever I take my shirt off I’m mostly worried last night’s snack is gonna fall out! Especially when we have spur of the moment sex!” You rambled theatrically, pointing at yourself and even going so far as to stand back up and shake out your current pajama top you were wearing that did, in fact, still have a few crumbs leftover in it’s creases from the snacks you were eating prior to his arrival. A fact, that made Jungkook chuckle with a wide, bunny toothed grin as he looked up and watched you from his sitting position on the floor. God, you were so fucking adorable. He couldn’t get enough of you.
Sporting a now cheeky grin, he pushed himself up off the floor with the help of the coffee table to once again tower over you with his height. Unexpectedly, he leaned down to kiss the top of your head warmly, making your cheeks flush once again with a pink hue.
“I’ve always appreciated your ability to plan ahead and provide refreshments at every occasion.” He playfully acted like he was lifting a crumb off your shoulder to put into his mouth, before making a chewing motion with his mouth and moaning loudly as if he enjoyed the invisible food in his mouth. The act making you roll your eyes and shove his chest playfully in reply.
“It’s a hidden talent of mine, what can I say?” You nonchalantly told him with a raise of your shoulders, your hands held out at your sides palm up, as if to say ‘so what’?
“Seriously though, there is far more to you than you realize. Trust me.” He now opted to pat your head fondly, voice exuding nothing but truth. “And I need to make sure I’m doing right by you. Anything short of that isn’t fair to you.”
Playing with your hands, your body slightly curling in on itself from the loving tone Jungkook just used towards you of all people, made your shy side come out, not expecting the wholesome statement from the once playboy CEO.
Mustering up your courage, you looked up at Jungkook who had a sincere, loving, expression on his face directed towards you. You expected your voice to come out at an average voice frequency, but instead it came out as an almost whisper, it didn’t help that your voice still cracked in a few places. Thankfully, Jungkook’s ears could easily pick up your voice in the quiet living room that was devoid of all noise besides the rhythmic ticking of the wall clock that hung on your wall.
“I appreciate the apology, Jungkook. Thank you, truly. And I understand you’re in a really stressful place, but you don’t get to take it out on me.” Your voice gained more confidence at the end, which you were grateful for, wanting to convey that you will never allow him to use you in the same way again.
“You’re absolutely right.”
“Jungkook, have you ever had to deal with anything like this before? With nosy reporters and media outlets prying into your private details?” You were genuinely curious, not ever having to deal with it yourself, personally. But unlike you, Jungkook made a name for himself, a well known one that would capture the attention of the world around him.
“I take it you don’t read tabloids?” He chuckled at you humorlessly.
Not wanting to confess to essentially stalking the young CEO through various news outlets and social media, you decided to tell a white lie.
“I tend to skim through the news for important bits and that’s about it.”
He made a face of mild amusement, not quite believing you, but choosing to anyways.
“That’s smart. To answer your question, yes, I’ve often had to deal with reporters being in the private details of my life. In fact,” he raised his pointer finger up into the air with emphasis, “–that’s how I found out a former partner of mine was breaking contract with me. And how I found out my father was trying to edge me out of one of my companies many years ago.”
Your jaw dropped from the sudden information, your head still wracking your brain around his words. You sputtered unladylike in response, an action that made him genuinely laugh at your antics. But one thing stuck out to you that you needed an answer to.
“Wait, so–,” you gave him a confused look, “are you saying that your girlfriend, Sun-Yee, was just another contract holder? That’s why you two were together?”
He made a ‘so, so’ sign with his hand, as he gave off a look of indifference on his face.
“Yes, and no. Yes, she was a contract holder, but no, she was never actually my girlfriend. She only ever called herself that to anyone who asked, and I didn’t have the energy or time to correct her words to every single person she told. In the end, I just ignored it, cause she knew where I stood on the matter.”
A look of awe was on your face, your mouth open in a wide ‘o’. She would be the kind of person to do that.
“She broke off the contract with you? Why?” You didn’t believe that it was her that actually did it, you kinda always thought it was him.
“Yes, she did. Not that I really cared. I was close to breaking it off myself from the way she always acted and treated everyone. Both professionally and personally. Like you.” He gave you a look of remorse. “I’m sorry for the way she treated you. It was rude and unfair on her part. It’s actually one of the many reasons I chose you as my personal assistant, other than realizing that you were more than capable for the position. It was also my silent way of apologizing to you for all the times I didn’t, but should’ve, stood up for you and everyone else that crossed her path. Never did I expect that you taking the position would lead me to loving you, but hey–,” he smiled lovingly at you with warm eyes, “I’ll take it.”
“You know you’re an idiot, right?” You stated rhetorically, reaching up to wrap your arms loosely around his neck, hands folding at the nape of his neck as your fingers mindlessly played with his baby hairs.
“Yes.”
“But you’re my idiot.” You reiterated with confidence, now tapping the nape of his neck with your fingers, your silent way of telling him to ‘bring yourself down to my level you giraffe’.
He caught on to your tapping, and reacted instantly, his upper body immediately bending down to efficiently lock eyes with you, now being at your eye level. His hands caressed your sides lovingly, as he smoothly slid them underneath your pajama top with ease. His eyes that were once smiling now changing to one’s of regret, as his fingertips traced over a spot on your hip that was slightly raised. It was the spot where he bit you.
Shit. As soon as you felt his hand run back over the spot on your hip, the spot, you knew he would figure it out. Wanting to wipe the sad look off his face you uttered a few words with love and affirmation before he fell into a dark pit of despair.
“Don’t. I love you.”
Closing the gap between your bodies, your lips clashed against his both as a distraction from his self deprecating thoughts, and because you’ve been wanting to kiss him to see how it felt now that he had a lip piercing. It was everything you dreamed of, and more. It was such a minuscule thing, but it initiated a flame deep within your stomach that wouldn’t be satiated until you both collapsed onto the couch in an entanglement of limbs.
Which is exactly what was currently happening, the kiss having turned into a heated one quickly. Both of your bodies responding to each other with the same amount of desperation and need from being away from each other the last three months. Clothes were either shoved or ripped off, courtesy of Jungkook and R.I.P to your favorite pajama set, but you couldn’t bring yourself to care at this moment.
Now fully nude, Jungkook took a hovering position over you as he abruptly pulled away from the kiss, his knees parting your thighs as you could feel the tip of him languidly swipe over your aching folds. It made you exhale breathlessly and Jungkook groan with his eyes shut, willing himself to not continue until he got your full consent.
Opening his eyes, he looked down at you with a sincere look of worry, his pupils were still blown with a lust filled haze, but you could tell his sole focus was making sure you were okay with what was about to transpire.
Nodding your head, you leaned up to gently kiss him on the lips, a silent signal that he could continue. He whispered lovefelt words into your mouth before thrusting his hips forward into yours, the delicious contact making you whimper into his mouth as you finally felt whole again.
“I love you, y/n.”
Your heart swelled and your eyes rolled into the back of your head at the toe curling, unrelenting, pace of his hips slamming into yours, mouth open in a silent moan he made sure to swallow with his own mouth now back on yours. And you knew for sure, he meant it.
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