#But he doesn't hold a gun up to your head unless it's a scenario like what HoS tried to pull

[lovesomehate]

MovieStar-Laura & Bodyguard Travis pt4

✨It's undeniable that things are awkward. It's even more undeniable that their relationship has changed.

Travis no longer wants to engage with their question game. They almost don't eat together anymore. It's random when it happens and Travis doesn't engage in a full conversation. His answers are short and to the point or he refuses to answer.

This has unfortunately caused some issues with Laura's performance. She gets a little distracted during her shots but goes full force once she takes the to time forget about Travis. Her appearances and interviews are very rehearsed in nature and also somewhat robotic.

The car rides are suffocating. Laura makes more demands for stops, but they're trivial. Either they wander the mall for hours only stopping to eat. Or Laura just buys a ton of shit she doesn't need nor want. They're either given away or returned within a week.

******

✨There were a few problems with production and the filming location so unfortunately The Quarry is put on pause. Without the show taking up about half her mind Laura takes more time to wonder about Travis. Then about Travis, the attack, and his wound. Then the attack and wound.

She's in the front room vaguely watching a show when Travis leaves his room and comes upfront.

"Hey, Travis?" She calls over to him.

"Yes, Ms. Kearney." His tone is curt, it seems that he hasn't been able to shake it since that day.

"I've been thinking about the attack."

"I told you not to worry about that I'm fine."

"I know and I'm happy about that, but what if it happens again?"

"It might, but that's what I'm there for."

"But what if something happens if something like that happens and your trip, or maybe more than one guy attacks, or we're separated in a crowd?"

"What's your point Ms. Kearney?"

"Can you show me some things? Like how a few restraints, how to throw a proper punch, or how to use a gun."

Travis just looks at her and she clearly sees the debate going on in his hand on the matter. His lips press tightly.

"I can show you a few restraints, how to throw a punch, and what to do when if you're caught." He's prepared a simple plate of fruit and a cup of water and prepares to go back to his room. "I'm saying no on the gun."

"What if I get a hold of one? What if I need to use it?"

"It's a no." He pauses and plays scenarios in his head. "Maybe I'll teach you, but after you learn the former, okay?"

"Okay," Laura responds and Travis can't help but notice the sadness in her voice.

"Is there anything else Ms. Kearney?"

'Why won't you look at me.' Laura thinks.

He's been so cautious about not looking at her unless absolutely necessary. Even just now he kept his back to her the whole save for the glimpse of his profile as he headed back to his room.

"Nothing. Thanks, Travis." Is what she says.

Travis leaves his door unlocked as usual, but unlike other times it's completely closed.

******

✨Laura has a treadmill, a few small weights, an exercise ball, and a yoga mat that makes up for all her exercise equipment. The core of her apartment was big enough that they could train there but it was a pain to move everything. For now and for the sake of less frustration they rented a room at the neighborhood gym.

It's an exchange of examples and practice. Laura is frustrated with not catching on, but Travis gives her the old adage that practice makes perfect and not to rush herself.

By the end they've worked up a decent sweet, they pointedly don't look at each other.

******

✨There's another interview right before The Quarry is back to filming. Laura's frustration and anger has been mounting and it affects what she's doing. She to the shock or anger of everyone gets up and leaves in the middle of it.

Travis stomps after her as she exits the talk show.

"What the hell are you doing?" He's already right on her heels.

"I'm leaving. I need to clear my head of all this bullshit." She roughly pushes past some employees. Travis apologizes on her behalf.

"You need to stop acting like a child and get your shit together."

Laura stops and spins on her heels, Travis stops just as short almost running into her.

"You're the one that needs to get their shit together." She's shouting now. "I apologized for that day more than I can, but does this have to go on. I'm going crazy."

"Ms. Kearny-"

"Shut up! You don't bother looking at me for the most basic things. I'm back to living with a stranger in my house. If I wanted that maybe I'd get my manager to hire some new bodyguard."

She didn't mean it and it hurt when it came out of her mouth. She was hurt that she would even say something so unthinkingly. Travis was hurt because he never thought such a thing would cross her mind.

"Ms. Kearney? I apologize for my behavior, but..." He didn't really know what to say, so he went the professional logical choice. "If you feel that would be preferable, then I respect your decision and can get in contact with your manager and my company right away."

Laura was breathing heavily, Travis didn't know if she was going to rage, but she looked like she might cry. He didn't expect her to bring her foot down on his knee, causing him to stumble awkwardly back. He wasn't surprised when she sprinted the last few feet through the door, he could make out her being washed into the crowd.

******

✨ 'Fuck. Fuck. Fuck!' Laura screamed to herself. 'I am acting like a fucking child.'

That thought didn't make her stop and turn around. The thought didn't make her answer her phone. She kept speed walking against the crowd. She hated this. How the fuck did she end up like this. Why couldn't she keep some high school-like crush under control? Why did she see him so differently? Because she found it fun to frustrate him at first in an attempt to make him quit. Because she started asking questions that opened him up more and let her see past his grumpy facade. Because she felt so safe with him watching over her.

"Hey, I recognize you."

Laura looked up. Her hair was a mess and over her face and she'd been looking down the whole time. She was exuding an aura of "I'm dealing with shit so go the fuck away". So who the hell even noticed her. The voice was male and she didn't know who to expect. She wasn't thrilled to see the drunk flirty asshole from the club.

"You've got to be kidding me." She meant to think it but said it out loud and didn't really give a shit. "How the hell do you even remember me?"

"Could never forget a face that beautiful. You look like you're having a tough time. Need to talk it out or need a drink?"

A drink sounded good and she was willing to take it from a total stranger to some point. But looking at this guy and remembering their first meeting, she wasn't that sad or hated herself that much.

"No thank you." She tried to walk away.

And the asshole cut her off.

"One drink won't hurt. It'll help you loosen up a little. At least let you destress if not make you not angry anymore."

She looked like him for the clown he was and just let loose the first thing that came to her mind.

"No offense but you seem like the type to roofie a girl."

"How the fuck is that not something to take offense from." His smile dropped into a threatening glare, but Laura wasn't phased.

"I said no offense." She shrugged and started walking past him. "But good luck with yourself. Maybe you'll find someone who tolerates you so you don't have to be a piece of shit."

The man grabbed her by the elbow and she couldn't help that her mind flashed back to when Travis first did that. It made her anger flare.

"Something like that requires an apology." He said.

What he earned was punch to face. People watched and moved out of the way as the man fell backwards some and found himself leaning against a poll. Laura disappeared back into the crowd heading towards nowhere.

It was only a few minutes later that Travis found the man. He asked multiple people if they'd seen a woman wearing Laura's outfit. He was fortunate enough to get a few answers until he came across the same man. He groaned with a roll of his eyes.

"Ah, not you too. Didn't need to deal with you after your bitch."

"My-" Travis didn't finish the question. "Which way did she go?"

"Why should I tell you? Having a fight?" The man tried to joke.

Travis pulled the man to his feet, restrained him, and began to painfully twist his arm.

"Which way did she go?" It came out almost a growl.

The man pointed the way and Travis pushed him away the man tripping over his feet and onto the ground.

Travis rushed in the direction he was pointed. His heart was racing and he was panicking more and more by the second.

'Stupid girl.' He thought. 'Stupid fucking girl.'

Then finally. Finally, he spotted her. It wasn't just her clothes, even with it down he recognized her hair and he was familiar with her gait. He muttered brief apologies as he rushed forward. The crowd thickened again. He didn't want to but he didn't have a choice.

"LAURA!" He yelled over the crowd.

A few people looked at him. Some women looked at him until they realized they didn't know him. Laura raised her head.

"LAURA!" He yelled again and she turned and saw him.

He could see her glare and she turned, trying her best to move forward and further away from him. He called her name once more. Then one more time. She pulled out her phone and dialed him.

"Laura." He sounded out of breath when he answered.

"Stop calling my name!"

"Well, how else am I supposed to get your attention. I doubt Kearney or Ms. Kearney would have gotten you to stop. Not to mention I didn't want to start a fan crowd around you. Now would you please stop and come to me."

"Don't do that."

"I would have to tell you what to do if you didn't storm off like you didn't have common sense."

"Not that!"

Travis couldn't believe the nerve she had right now.

"Lau-"

"I just told you not to do that! Don't say my name if it doesn't mean anything." Her voice cracked.

Travis watched as stepped aside next to the entrance of an office building. He hesitates for a moment afraid of his next words.

"Laura," He can see her wince. "I already told you why I had to yell your name. If I ever said it again I wanted it to be..." He pinched the bridge of his nose.

"I'm afraid if that happens again. I'm trying to be professional but you are driving me insane. I don't want to make you upset, but Laura please, if I cross that line I don't know if it'll compromise how I work."

He started walking towards her.

"You don't think it could work?" She asks and it relieves him some.

"I don't think it would."

"I don't actually want a new bodyguard."

"I'm glad to hear that, but I'm starting to wonder."

"No. I don't want a new guard and you're not allowed to quit."

"You don't really have a say in that last part."

Laura looked up, Travis now beside her. They both hung up their phones. They both looked tired. Laura was holding back tears best she could.

"Please don't quit." She sniffled. "It's not a big deal. You know what it is. I haven't been in a relationship in a while. I haven't even had a crush in some years. Your nice, you're nice looking." That made Travis huff a laugh. "I think I just fell without thinking. This is a wake-up. I'll be fine, this will go away, and we can go back to normal."

He shouldn't. He shouldn't. He shouldn't. He should tell her that won't work. Tell her that this should be one of their last times together. That he doesn't want to test if her feelings were real. God how he wanted them to be real. Even if he felt bad for making her cry he should have better control over himself. He should be reaching up to wipe her tears away. He should ignore how he feels right now.

"I'm sorry for running." She says.

"I accept your apology." He said reluctantly pulling his hand away. "Will you come back with me? I'll drive you home and we can make lunch."

Laura whipped away her remaining tears.

"Yeah. That sounds nice. Although I don't know if I'll be able to enjoy it fully. My manager's going to be pissed."

Travis nodded in agreement.

"But we can worry about that the moment we get home." He extends his hand. "Come one."

Laura stared for a moment and slowly took his hand. Her hand was still wet, but she could feel how warm his palm was.

"Please stay close."

She nods and they start back towards the car. They didn't say anything as they walked. Neither of them said anything as Travis interlocked his fingers with hers.

Oh so this might have two more parts. I would have put more here, but I went and did a whole mini fic in this already strang bullet point fic.

Dude gjsjfjajfba I wanna shake them both by the shoulders (specially Travis, the self sacrificing dum dum) the frustration with him was real gjsnfjanfjdfn but I do feel it needed to happen 😂 cause he definitely is thick headed 🤦🏻

Can’t wait to see what makes him finally give in 😏

#ask #anon #travisxlaura

[juvederm]

mourning what chrisjosh could've been...

i feel like if it weren't so reliant on fanon it could've been really good. i have so many complaints about the characterization in this ship but a lot of just mixed feelings in general

a good portion of fics i read always had josh crushing on chris. am i the only one who never saw it that way??? (sometimes i can if it fits an AU or something, but there's only one instance so far that i've actually preferred it) i guess people wrote it like that bc chris had a crush on ashley and it made it really easy to write that "i like you but you like her" kinda thing

but chris is the one who cannot say his feelings toward someone he likes... he's the one crushing.

sam says "he's so afraid she's gonna shoot him down" blah blah "he should just go for it" and josh says "it's not gonna happen" to which sam says "which thing" and then josh says "well neither(....) and knowing chris he won't unless someone's holding a gun to his head"

"knowing chris" which means it's probably something he does a lot 😭 so why did people give that trait to josh? the "pining, afraid-to-be-rejected" one when chris is the one that canonically does that?

i prefer my chrisjosh as a one sided crush, a friendship of two people who have outgrown each other, a very juvenile kind of love that chris one of them cannot spit out. a lot of the depiction of these two was always some established relationship fluffy bullshit that, im sorry to be negative and harsh here, kinda sucked?

i mean you literally have to completely mischaracterize both of them to get it to work. that's why all these josh fics w josh pining after chris sounded so unnatural. like josh doesn't really do that ??? not like chris does at least (chris is also a romantic, i'm pretty sure, i don't think it's his highest stat but it's DEFINITELY higher than josh's)

but... maybe the scenarios people imagined for them were just without a reference, nothing to go back to, so they had to make stuff up. but like. it was stuff that the game had for these characters. like 😭 you can go watch or play the game and see how these characters act in certain scenarios and do your spin on it, not to say Change it entirely but like.

TLDR the fanon of chris and josh sucks balls and it sabotaged their ship so badly i want to claw my throat out

#ranting sorry #also i'm so scrambled rn i'm sorry if it didn't make sense but #i just hate the way this ship is characterized when there's so much more interesting and Realistic ways for it to be done #not to say the fluffy stuff is Entirely bad but like #cuz i like fluff and even for them i like it sometimes but there's not a lot of like good ones #i'm sorry if that sounds rude #chris #josh

[jinruinokyuseishu]

NOT ME SCREAMING AND CRYING RN OVER KEVIN GIVING SIRIN A CHOICE WHICH IS MORE THAN SCHICKSAL EVER GAVE HER???

#;;Off to another bubble universe. [OOC] #That's something I really love about Kevin #he gives you a choice #He even gives you more info than he probably should when he should be trying to keep things in his favor #But he doesn't hold a gun up to your head unless it's a scenario like what HoS tried to pull

[vickylamore]

If the Yns from Crys's fics were to meet, what would happen?

OKAY SO LIKE, HI, you'll only get this if you've read at least two of Crys's (@armytinyzenmoa) series cause, its alot to cover.

She already did this for Park Yn (Zemblanity) and Lee Yn (TSTL) but I'm doing it for:

Park Yn - Zemblanity (dumbass number one)

Yn - Glitched (dumbass number two, more logical, still slow.)

Byun Yn - LR (confident hoe, smart ass bitch, love to see it.)

Lee Yn - TSTL (a badass, a fucking queen, my favroite Yn, my baby, will fight for her/him period)

Only these Yns cause I didnt read the other series with Yeonjun and Seonghwa(?) and I don't have enough info on Jung Yn (Prominence) so four for now. I will update it when more Yns are added (series wise) 🙄❤.

Also, THIS IS CRACK. THE TYPOS ARE IMMACULATE but its litterally crack + crack writing style (and no tags cause the series aren't my work so the tags below are litterally... just there cause some of yall won't know about her stories SO IF YOU DONT, DONT READ BEYONG THIS POINT).

But yes, here we go 😗

--

If Byun Yn and Lee Yn were to meet in the TSTL TL!:

Byun and Lee Yn are like lowkey opposites but have the same upbringing traumatic so they can relate to each other.

Best fucking friends (sorry Lucas, Jeno).

They rob banks together period point blank.

Lee is a lot less reckless than Byun but is a lot more of a bitch.

Byun, smarter than the two since she's a fking genius but Lee is a lot more logical when it comes to surviving.

*cough* mafia *cough*.

Bye, theyd run from the cops for fun and if they get caught, Lee would just threatened them with her grandfather's name 😭🤚🏾

Lee Yn would ask Byun Yn to help them burn down SM and Byun would be like, "hold on, I can make a nuclear explosion to disintegrate all the malicious experiments they're performing on people but somehow save all the people affected."

And they'd run with it.

They'd give Baekyun a scare cause he's technically (not really) related to one and is the other's guardian so LR! Baek would kill him if his sister isn't back in one piece.

Taemin wouldn't understand what was happening but if it were to occur, he'd hope that both of them DON'T DIE since he doesn't want the Avengers and everyone else on his ass.

Ten would instigate Byun Yn into fighting him.

No actually.

He wouldn't get his ass beat because its like a two hour sparring match that Baekhyun breaks up.

Lucas is just... there. Confused on who's his best friend but figures it out when Byun Yn pushes him back saying, "hugs are reversed for Jeno."

Mark is fucking tired, probably draws his gun upon seeing two but then grumbles under his breath, "I'm not even surprised."

Lee Yn joins him on a walk while Byun Yn takes all the attention cause honestly, same.

Jongin asks Byun Yn on how to recharge in case of no energy source... cause well, she's a genius.

Byun Yn and Taeyong become friends and hack in SM's system to get all the shady shit they have on Sooman and replace the files with pictures of cats.

Yuh.

THEYD GIVE LEE SOOMAN A RUN FOR HIS MONEY. THATS IT, THATS THE TWEET.

--

If Byun Yn and Yn (Glitched) were to meet in L&R TL!:

She'd leave Glitched Yn for dead, she has no time for dumbasses Im sorry 👩🏾‍🦯

She'd deadass say one thing and Byun Yn would look at her up and down, smirk and whisper, "I could use you for bait."

The only reason Yn isn't dead is because the Avengers saved her before she could die cause they thought it was Byun (deadass wouldve saved her either way but like... priorities.)

THEYD BE SO CONFUSED AND DONE, OVER IT.

Yn wouldn't be TOO big of a dumbass, just very very curious and screw something up which meant that Jeno would try to kill her but Byun would be like "no, dont kill my useless twin."

Yn would be so confused because she just wanted to get her first day of the internship done and she was dropped in a world where the Avengers exists.

Goodbye, she's tired bruh.

Develops a crush on Jaemin, Chenle and Jisung and her become friends because she isn't as reckless as Byun and Renjun... is just tired and doesn't mind her at all.

--

If Byun Yn and Park Yn met in Zemb TL!:

Oh boy.

Someone save Byun Yn PLEASE.

Would accidentally ask Mark why he's in space and not with SuperM and he'd be so confused.

Byun Yn would save Park Yn from Yang² because Park Yn,,

Is just Park Yn *sigh*

That's the tweet.

Byun Yn is deadass is the only reason Park alive because Byun Yn saves her in a world thats not even hers.

Park Yn tries but her efforts aren't enough, needs help from Maverick Agent to get out smh.

Bro Byun Yn would somehow die BECAUSE of Park Yn and Byun would come back from the dead and be like, "whoever tried to drown me is a bitch."

Poor Park Yn would be so mfk confused and terrified and probably cling onto Byun Yn, sobbing into her chest while the other is like, "relax, I can't die here for some reason. If I could then you'd probably have multiple organizations run to kill you--- but don't cry?"

Park Yn would have to explain to YangYang not to take her unless he wants to die.

Ten and Byun Yn become friends, I don't make the rules.

They even become allies but Byun Yn wants to know where it'll go.

Hendery is confused, Lucas is even more confused, Sicheng thinks he fucked up again (IM SORRY), YangYang is intrigued, Kun is tired and tries warning her about Ten but doesn't listen, Park Yn has panic attacks because Byun Yn is being dumb and goes with Ten.

Though, Byun Yn meets her up later and says, "can you get me to a control panel, I wanna get out of here, this place is too crowded and I'm hungry."

Not because Ten tried killing her and she knocked him out

Park Yn would try explaining that they can't escape and Byun would interupt, "don't take me for a dumbass."

BRUH THEYD DEADASS WALK OUT OF SECTOR V NO PROBLEM.

Park Yn asks how Byun Yn did it and she'd be explaining things she wouldn't understand, "matrix, quatrums, space, matter, timeliness and interacting forcefields."

Park Yn would just nod and not even bother.

She'd also tell Byun about all the dumb shit that happened and the other would be like,

"Suprised you aren't dead yet and you really haven't seen anything, come to my world."

Park Yn is ✨traumatized✨

-

If Lee Yn were to met Park Yn in TSTL TL!(specifically for this one, Lee Yn is a girl because of the scenario):

They're litterally polar opposites, one of them is going to kill the other.

LEE YN WOULD TELL PARK YN THAT SHE'S A CRYBABY 💀

No joke, she'd be at Park Yns THROAT for litterally breathing and clinging onto Ten like he's her best friend (I mean)

Bruh she'd steal Mark away from Lee Yn and she'd get salty :(((

Also explore the world like shes a visitor and forget that there's a bounty on her head???

Like yeah, you were on the moon but there's a bounty in your head? The worse thing is that she'd drag her twin with her to the nearest coffee shop and refuses for ANY of the seven men to accompany them.

Something along the lines of, "I dont trust men to protect me anymore."

IM TELLING YOU, THE SHIT ON THE MOON REALLY MESSED WITH HER IM SO SORRY-

WOULD ALSO ALMOST GET BOTH OF THEM KILLED CAUSE SOOBIN DECIDED TO PULL UP AT THE COFFEE SHOP THEY WERE VISITING WITH THE REST OF FKING TXT.

Park Yn would probably run hella slow while they're getting chased with guns and she'd still be like, "why are they chasing us?!"

And Lee would reply, "what part of I'm first in line of my grandfathers grande mafia aren't you understanding?"

Like Lee is TIRED, she doesn't want this shit anymore. Doesn't help that she was going to give Park a chance but she clearly isn't fit for the mafia lifestyle.

The only thing they have in common is Mark. That's it.

So like after running and getting back to base, Lee would litterally chase Park ALL OVER THE PLACE trying to get to her.

For some reason, Park is fast.

Must be from all that running on the moon damn 😭🤚🏾

"Please I dont want to die again!"

- Park Yn, 2020.

Baby girl has been through some shit okay?

Lee Yn got frustrated real quick and almost threated to pull out her gun PLEASE.

Something along the words of, "people try to kill me all the time, let's see how hard it is."

"Stop fucking running!"

"But you're chasing me with a gun!?"

Taeyong would litterally watch this all go down on the cams for like five minutes before he tells the rest of SuperM that Park Yn is thirty seconds away from dying because Lee Yn is now taking the safety off her gun 💀

No Lee really can't stand her.

Its litterally chaos.

Jongin had to glitch to get Park away from a flying bullet.

Taemin was making sure she was fine while being on the lookout for the other Yn.

Baekhyun's trying to help Taeyong erase the film of two Yns running around the base like mad women.

Lucas had to deal with a pissed off Lee Yn cause sis was not having it.

Almost lost her.

He did, in fact, lose her.

Mark had to chase her down AGAIN.

Chaos LMAO

--

If Yn and Park Yn were to met in Zemblanity TL!:

Rest In Peace.

Would die within the first 2 hours of being together.

All because the readers picked 'go to the boiler room' over 'hide in the vents'.

And they BOTH died because someone turned the heat on.

The end.

#nct #superm #IM FUCKING TIRED BRUH #crack #nct crack #superm crack #vickywritings #CRYS DO YOU LIKE IT LMAO #if the yns were to meet

[xxisxxisxxis]

Gateway Drug | Part Forty-Eight

Table of Content or Part Forty-Seven

Wattpad

Word count: 5.6k

Warning(s): explicit language, drug abuse, verbal abuse, explicit sexual situations, graphic mention of suicide

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"We can get your stuff up and drop it off later." Duff offers as I pull my shoes on and grab my car keys.

"Okay."

"Don't forget your purse." He adds, and I grab it from the coffee table.

"You alright going by yourself, Viv?" Steven asks me and I tuck a strand of wet hair behind my ear.

"Doc's meeting me there." I tell him.

"So, you don't know if he's okay?" He asks next and I exhale.

"No. I don't, and I really, really don't want to think of him not being okay so let's just not talk about it." I tell him, stepping to the door.

"Well, can you call us and let me know how he's holding up?" He follows me to the door and I nod. 

"I will." I assure him, grabbing his hand in mine and squeezing it for a moment. "Thank you for letting me stay with you. I love you, I'll talk to you later." I say to him.

"Love you, too." He replies, smiling a little.

I leave to my car and head home as fast as I can. 

I hate to be morbid, but every worst case scenario was flashing through my mind.

He had a plethora of all sorts of drugs throughout the house, plenty of sharp knives around, we had a pool, he kept a gun in our room...there was no shortage of suicide attempts or methods to use if he felt in the shock of Nona's death, that he couldn't go on.

And that's all I could focus on the entire way to the house.

I punch the code in the gate and as soon as I get in the driveway, I'm putting the Corvette in park, yanking the keys out, bursting out of the car and sprinting up the stairs to the front door, my shaking hands fumbling to unlock it.

The second I get the door open, it's pretty obvious Nikki hasn't kept the house up. At all.

Clothes are on the floor, empty cling wrap that obviously housed bindles of coke are scattered about, empty liquor bottles decorate almost every flat surface, empty syringes randomly placed throughout the living room and a bitter, familiar smell violates my nostrils from the kitchen.

I slowly make my way to our bedroom, looking around for Nikki.

His closet door is open, revealing a floor littered with needles, lumps of tar, pills and blow...and a crack pipe.

"Well, that's a new demon." I mumble, disappointed, before stepping to our bathroom.

I open the door, and sigh with relief at the sight of him in the bathtub, staring off.

I'm 99.9% sure he's stoned out of his mind.

"Nikki?" I ask him softly, getting on my knees beside the bathtub.

I notice a disgusting looking clumpy mixture is floating atop the water, and I realize it's vomit.

"Babe." I say more sternly this time, hoping to get a reaction. His dead, somber eyes shift to me. "C'mon, let's get out." I suggest, reaching into the water that's turned cold from him being in here for long.

"Just fuck off." He says to me, trying to stand up on him own, but he nearly falls out of the tub.

I just ignore him, helping him out, careful not to get the vomit that's clinging to his skin, on me.

"You need to rinse off in the shower." I suggest to him.

"Get me a shot of blow." He tells me slowly.

"I'm not getting you drugs." I reply calmly, moving his wet hair from his face as he holds himself up using the counter.

"Then what's the point of having you around?" He snaps.

"You're fucked up, covered in your own vomit. I don't think you're in any position to piss off your only help at the time you need it most." I tell him as politely as I can. "Please let me help you, Nikki. I think we've done enough damage to each other the past couple of months to last a life time."

He looks at me, a mixture of defeat and exhaustion cloaking his features.

He doesn't argue when I turn the shower on.

By the time he's rinsed off, the door bell's ringing, and I'm handing him a towel and going to the door to see Doc once I've got it open.

"Hey." He says. "How is he?"

"He just got out the shower. I'm gonna try to get him to go to bed. He looks like he hasn't slept in days." I explain.

"Alright." He nods. "I'll check back in later. Just call if you guys need anything."

"Thanks, Doc." I reply and he gives a sad look before going back to his car.

I go back the bathroom to see Nikki rinsing his mouth out with Jack.

I take the time to notice he's gained some weight back. I thought he'd lose more of it, especially since he's on crack now, apparently.

"Funeral's saturday." He says out of nowhere, and I bite my lip nervously, not saying a word. "My granddad gave me directions to get there but I forgot already."

Again, I don't say a word.

I don't have to. He can read my expression.

"I mean, that's why you're here, isn't it?" He asks, knowingly. "Pretty sad it takes the woman who raised me, dying, in order for my fucking wife to come home."

"You need to sleep." I ignore his comment, guilt reeling through me.

"And you just need to go back to your replacements for Mötley. I don't need you here." He argues.

"Pretty loud barking for someone who spent how many nights calling me, crying for me to come home?" I remind him as I cross my arms.

"I was fucked up." He states.

"Sober thoughts." I counter him.

"Vivian. I'm not fighting with you. Fuck off or shut up because I've got enough going on right now and I'm not wasting time on going back and forth with you." He steps past me to the bedroom and I follow after him.

"Of course not. You'd much rather waste time shooting up and free basing." I scoff, and I'm quickly dodging an empty bottle of whiskey as it collides with our bedroom wall right beside my head.

"Go to hell!" He screams at me, shaking, angry tears sprouting down his cheeks. "I can't even grieve in peace because you just refuse to let me do what I need to do! You aren't happy or satisfied unless I'm fucking miserable! I'm in hell right now and you come in and start shit just because you can, and you know exactly what fucking buttons to press to get under my skin and suck the life out of me like a fucking leech!"

"Drugs don't help anything, Nikki. It makes things worse. You just need to let yourself feel everything and power through it."

"When your aunt slit her fucking wrists you couldn't keep yourself off my dick for weeks! You fucking avoided talking about it and kept yourself distracted with me! In fact, while they were having her funeral and burying her, you were face down on my bed begging 'harder, Daddy', so I don't want to hear shit from you, of all people, about how I should cope!" He doesn't hold back, his shaking finger pointed at me viciously and I rub my lips together, tears toppling from my eyes.

Nikki's coping mechanism was drugs. Mine was sex. That's why, once our marriage got so bad off we couldn't even be in the same room, let alone touch each other, I went to Duff because I couldn't get my emotional and physical fix from Nikki anymore.

Messed up. Sad. But true.

"Okay." I say lowly, sniffling a little from crying. "I'm gonna go call Tom and get the directions. We can leave early Saturday morning." I mumble, leaving him alone as fast as I can without making it look obvious.

I shut the door behind me and head for the phone in the living room, dialing Tom's and Nona's number.

"Hello?"

"T-Tom, this is Viv." I start, my stomach in knots.

"Oh, hey...how're you doing?" He asks me and I rub my lips together.

"I could be better."

He let's out a barking laugh and I hear the pain in his voice as he says:

"I know exactly how you feel."

"Well, I was just calling to get directions to where the funeral is gonna be held. Nikki wasn't paying attention the first time you told him, I'm sure he was in shock."

"Well his aunt and I have called a lot the past couple months to try to tell him Nona was getting worse, but nobody answered the phone until today." He tells me and I let out a breath.

"We haven't been at home much." I reply, grabbing a pen and a envelope from the stack of bills on the coffee table. "What were those directions, again?"

He tells me and once I finish jotting them down, I'm struggling to find what to say.

"Thank you." I tell him. "And I'm really sorry."

"I'll be alright. You kids take care, I'll see you soon."

"We will, bye-bye."

"Bye-bye."

I hang up, letting out a breath as I fall back on the couch, feeling a migraine coming over me.

I close my eyes for a moment before opening them, taking in our house that is in shambles currently.

"How am I gonna have him presentable in three freaking days?" I ask God, fear that Nikki won't be put together in time, cracks into my mind before I avoid thinking about it by deciding to clean the house up.

It's while cleaning that I realize the redecorating Nikki's done while I've been gone.

Some of our furniture throughout the house has been replaced with what seem to be antique versions of it.

He's gotten black out curtains hung in every window, and there's even freaky looking gargoyles he's put up in some corners that look like demons leering in the house. They probably praise him each time he takes a shot of heroin or a hit of his pipe.

I ignore the new look of the place, once he's sober and out of this hole he's dug himself he'll want to be more uplifting and light and change the place back to how it was. But right now he's dark and gloomy, so of course where he resides is going to match that.

By the time I've finished cleaning the kitchen, dining area, living room, and our bedroom, he's coming out of hiding.

"I talked to your grandfather and got the directions." I tell him from my spot on the couch, watching TV, as I hear him open a bottle of wine in the kitchen.

He steps into the living room and sits on the other end of the couch, an entire bottle of white wine in hand, his eyes hazy, nothing but unlaced leather pants covering him up.

"I talked to Doc and he's booking us a flight for early Saturday morning, and late Saturday night so we can come back so you guys can start on the new album as soon as you can."

I glance over, seeing a new tattoo on him I completely overlooked earlier when I helped him out of the tub.

"When did you get that?" I ask, leaning forward on my knees to trace my finger along the sharp leafing of a rose stem on the right side of his chest.

He tenses a little when I touch him, his eyes glowering at me for a split second before averting back to the TV ahead of us.

I just swallow my pride.

"Nikki, I'm sorry I came in and started a fight. I know you need as much serenity you can get right now and I shouldn't have said all that stuff to you." I let out, getting it off my chest.

At first I think he doesn't hear me, until he's exhaling heavily.

"I said fucked up shit to you about your aunt." He tells me. "I shouldn't have brought that into an argument."

"We haven't seen each other for two months and I immediately started in on you, not to mention you're going through a lot and don't need me dogging on you. You had every right to say what you did." I assure him.

It's clear in his facial expression that he doesn't agree, but he doesn't try to argue anymore than we already have.

He gives me a little smile, a dopey smile, something I didn't know he'd be doing much of since the situation with Nona. Then again, he's numbed himself pretty heavily.

His ring filled fingers come up to push my hair back over my shoulder, and my heart sputters wildly in my chest as he slowly coaxes me closer to him, hand beginning to gently grasp at my hair to pull me to him.

His lips are soon brushing against mine as if testing the waters, before he presses a small,  innocent kiss to my lips.

It's bizarre to think I haven't kissed him in two fucking months.

Apparently he feels the same, because the second our lips separate, he's going in for more.

I pull away a little, though and keep my hand on his chest as he looks at me, confused.

"I'm not sure if it's a good idea to do this right away." I tell him in a whisper, trying to keep myself at bay.

"Why not?" He asks in the same tone, his fingers leaving my hair so his finger tips can ghost over the skin down my neck, down my sides, catching at the bottom of my black tank top before sliding under the fabric to touch at my skin.

"Because we--" I stop talking, holding back a moan as his hand slides up my stomach and brushes over my breast.

"Because why?" He asks me, knowing what he's doing.

"Because we were just separated for a couple months and..." he grabs at my hips, pulling me onto straddle him before putting his bottle of wine down on the carpeted floor. "...a-and it's just not the best ide--ah!" A high pitched whimper escapes my throat as his teeth grasps at my nipple through the cloth of my tight fitted top, his tongue swirling around it before releasing.

He smirks at me, and I try to collect what's left of my composure.

Of course I want to fuck around. But I don't want to take advantage of him.

His hand slips between my legs next, rubbing back and forth a couple of times, causing me to squeeze my eyes closed as I can't help but to grind into his hand.

"Oh, shit." I swear under my breath, feeling slickness coat my panties with each movement against his hand.

My hands rest back on his knees, my head tilts back and I just grind against his fingers for as long as I can, electricity bubbling in my core.

Before long, I'm soaking through my shorts, causing him to chuckle a little.

"Stand up." He tells me and I do, keeping myself from rubbing my thighs together. "Take your clothes off." He says next.

I take in a breath, pulling my top of my head slowly, a wash of confidence hitting at me as his eyes stay glued to my tits, my nipples practically begging for his mouth.

My shorts are next, my hips swaying a little as I get them down my legs, and I nearly lick my lips at the sight of him with his legs slightly more spread, a toothy grin plastered on his face.

I don't touch my panties, crouching down and crawling to where he's sitting, the palms of my hands rubbing up his thighs before pawing at the bulge in his pants.

He just let's out a small hiss as I grab at him, before his hand is around my throat.

My eyes roll back, my legs shift to rub at myself and when I look back up at him he looks like he has an idea.

"Do you want it?" He asks me, still choking me enough to get me even more wet and I let out a needy sound.

"Please." I beg, that need to be filled starting to overwhelm me.

"Show me how bad you want it." He says, drinking some of his wine, letting my throat go.

I think I catch him off guard when I slide up his body to straddle his right thigh, moving my scanty making sure my clit is resting against the leather of his pants before I slowly start humping at him, riding him like I would his cock.

My soaked cunt makes it easy to move against him, a wet sound of me using him to fuck myself echoes in my ears.

"My dirty little bitch." He teases, his hand in his pants at this point.

"All your's." I say thickly, my hand meeting his at his prick, taking over as I start jerking him off the best I can while he's trapped in the skin tight confinement.

He tilts his head back, taking a deep breath as I work him while continuing to grind against his thick thigh that's proving useful as a fucktoy.

He's reaching in his pocket before long, pulling out his switch blade and sawing at the band of my thong, causing it to give way and pop off.

He greedily yanks it from me and tosses it away, his eyes taking in my pubic bone and spread, wet lips grinding against his leg.

"So fucking pretty." He says to me, bucking up into my hand, his hands going for my pussy to angle me where he can see my clit rubbing back and forth against him, leaving a trail of liquid in each go.

"Can I please ride it, baby, please?" I plead, the torture of feeling his thick, hard length and not being able to do anything about it is driving me insane.

He looks at me, fingers sliding between my legs, getting a coating of arousal on them before holding them up to me.

I wrap my lips around his digits, moaning at my taste, continuing to suck on his fingers like I'm giving them a blowjob, my eyes fluttering closed.

After a couple minutes, he's pulling his fingers from my mouth before getting me off of him so he can get his pants down.

I rest sitting on my knees, looking up at him as he gets himself freed, beads up precum dripping out of him, and I catch them with my tongue.

He gasps at the action, grinning as he grabs his bottle of wine.

I'm confused for a moment before he's pouring the alcohol onto my shoulder, causing it to spill down my back, my chest, and my legs, emptying the nearly full bottle, the warm wetness eliciting a giggle from me as he drops to his knees in front of me, pushing me onto my back.

His tongue licks up my pussy to my wine soaked stomach, biting at the rib he likes to bite at, before licking up my chest and neck, causing me to laugh and moan simultaneously, threading my fingers through his thick hair once his tongue intertwines with mine.

He grabs at himself, rubbing between my entrance and my clit before sliding just the head of his cock into me.

I arch my back, already preparing for the full feeling of him completely in me.

He pulls away from me, getting on his knees.

"Spread your legs." He says and I open them, spread eagle, giving him the perfect view of his goal.

He curses to himself under his breath, admiring me for a moment before grabbing my hips, lifting them up to meet him, and positioning himself at my cunt.

His eyes focus on my face as he slowly pushes into me to the hilt, pressing against my cervix.

"God I've missed this." He says, pulling out of me and pushing back in.

"I have, too." I breathe out, falling into rhythm with his demanding thrusts, my fingers pinching and rolling my nipples as he obliterates my swollen sex.

My juices drip down the both of us and joins the wine on the carpet, further turning me on along with the site of him looking down at himself going in and out of me while I lick my lips at the site of sweat beginning to appear on his chest.

One of my hands reaches up to play with my clit and he spits onto the bundle of nerves to further lubricate my fingers' movements, and I pull my lip into my mouth and arch my spine at the site.

He's leaning down in a moment to kiss me hotly, his tongue colliding with mine before I'm biting at his lip with my teeth, my nails clawing down his side before pushing him onto his back, climbing on top of him.

I'm licking the sweat off his chest as I sink down on to him, his hands holding at my hips while I move against him.

I slowly lift off of him, my breath catching in my throat as he moves his hips up as mine come down, burying him to the hilt.

His hands spread across my stomach to move up and down my sides, before grabbing at my ass, igniting hot flames through my skin.

My long hair is sticking to my body as the wine he poured over me is starting to mix with the sheen of sweat on my skin and getting sticky.

My thighs shake as our pace picks up because the need to reach the high over powers the need to savor the moment.

He's got my hips in a white-knuckle grip, thrusting up into me while pulling me down onto him in sync.

My moans, his grunts, and the sound of our sex fills the air as my toes curl, and I start tightening around him like a python.

"Good girl." He says, his hand smacking painfully onto my ass, knowing I'm about to finish and I arch my back and flex my hips, my tits bouncing with each powerful stroke he gives me.

I close my eyes as a  whimper leaves my lips, a tear rolls down my cheek, and my muscles spasm around him as I orgasm, unable to even moan anymore as my body pumps itself full of dopamine.

I ride it out, as he slows down our pace, opening my eyes to see him staring up at me with half-open eyes, more than likely about to come, too.

"You're so fucking beautiful." He tells me, and I lean forward, kissing him for a moment before grinning down at him mischievously, purposely tightening around him, feeling every vein and ridge of his cock, as my hand reaches to massage his balls while I fuck him.

"Ah, fuck, Viv." He groans to himself, squeezing his eyes closed as pleasure washes over his face.

I feel his thighs shake little and bite my lip as his hands grope at my breasts with the same rhythm my hand gropes at him.

"You drive me f--shit--fucking crazy." He breathes out.

"I know." I reply sultrily, imagining his load emptying out into me and how good it will feel.

He tenses up and I cry out softly as he harshly pinches at my nipples.

"I gotta--ah!" He takes in a rough breath, screwing his eyes shut. "I gotta pullout so you won't get knocked up." He gets it out choppily.

"I won't." I assure him, selfishness pushing clear-thinking out of the picture.

"Viv--"

"--Nikki, please." I beg, my voice thick with need and lust and he shutters out another breath. "Tell me you don't want to and I'll get off of you."

I squeeze at his balls slightly harder, his fingers gripping at my thighs hard enough to leave bruises before we're both looking down between us to see his prick glistening in my cum.

"Tell me you don't want to fill me up and remind me whose I am." I keep my thrusts steady and a slew of swears swarm past his lips in a low tone, one of his hands moving to grip at his hair for a moment as if he's trying to get himself together.

My other hand moves to pull him to sit up and he wraps his arms around my waist, his body giving way to euphoria as he groans out, hot cum shooting into me.

My eyes roll back and close, missing the feeling of us like this as a satisfied mew slips out of my throat, Nikki's lips pressing across my chest bone, up my neck and finally to my lips.

My fingers get lost in his sweat soaked hair, my wet, sticky chest against his as we hold each other.

We both fall back onto the carpet before long, and I get off of him, curling up beside him and laying my cheek against his chest, focusing on his heartbeat because it's miraculous that he still has one.

His hand runs up and down my back, and with the mixture of a natural high, satisfaction, and--for the first time in a long time--peace, coursing through me, I'm lulled to sleep.

He wanted to pull out that night because he didn't want to pass anything to me, because he hadn't gotten a penicillin shot since screwing around on me.

Being that he had the control of a twelve-year old boy discovering porn for the first time, I don't know what the hell he would have come up with had I actually contracted something the random groupies he'd fucked in my absence, or Vanity, had accidentally given him.

I had no clue, but my high and optimism was blown a few minutes after we had our makeup session, anyway.

I open my eyes, seeing myself in the mirror on the ceiling of the living room, naked, Nikki nowhere to be seen.

I stretch, soreness spurring between my legs and I wince some, but smile at the fact Nikki and I are okay now.

Grabbing a throw from the back of the couch, I wrap it around me, stepping through the house to find Nikki.

Maybe he's in the shower.

Our bathroom's empty, and I furrow my brows, before hearing something moving around in our closet.

I swallow the lump forming in my throat and open the door, seeing Nikki shaking with wide eyes, naked, holding his gun straight at me.

He was so fucked up. He'd get loaded on crack and think someone was out to get him, he'd scream and cry and wave his gun around, hallucinating people crawling under the front door, coming to kill him, or the cops coming to arrest him.

He'd flush his own drugs, every last one, out of paranoia of the FBI finding him. Then he'd come down from his high and be pissed at himself.

There were times he would actually shoot his fucking gun in the house.

I couldn't step foot in the living room for over a month because we had to get the mirrored tiling replaced and the ceiling patched because he shot all of the mirroring out.

I bet who ever had that house after us was still vacuuming shards of glass out of the carpet.

I shut the closet door back without a word, leaving him to himself to come down.

I lock myself in the guest bedroom and try to keep from crying.

I realized then that it didn't matter how good of a wife I was, how mind blowing the sex was, how much I worshipped the ground he walked on, how much I tried...it would never be enough.

Drugs were what he was truly in love with.

I guess Vanity and I both had that in common.

We were both, simply, the other woman.

Wednesday passed with Nikki too doped up to barely roll over in the closet floor on his own.

Thursday he had Jason come over, while I went to the grocery store, so he could get some more blow to counter the heroin symptoms and nodding off.

Friday he overdid it while freebasing and was convinced "Mexicans and midgets" were "after him" (a reoccurring theme, I would soon learn.)

And Saturday...

"Nikki, babe, c'mon. We're gonna miss our flight." I put in my second earring as he stands up from the couch, stumbling forward, and falling onto the carpet, spilling his drink all over himself. "Nikki!" I rush to his side to make sure he's okay, and he's not.

Despite being clear of physical ailments, his eyes tell it all. "Have you even slept?" I ask him, helping him sit up before sitting on my knees in front of him.

He doesn't answer and I sigh, closing my eyes.

"Do you just not want to go her funeral, Nikki?"

"I'm gonna be fucked up, I'm gonna have to face my family, my mother...and I'm gonna have to accept the fact she's dead." He admits bitterly, angry at himself for not pulling his shit together in time but also angry at the fact she's gone in the first place. "It isn't fair. You know how many people--disgusting people--deserve to be dead? I can name five or six just off the top of my head alone, Viv. But do those people die? No. The people who deserve to live the most, the people who love their lives and don't take it for granted are always the ones that get the fucking short end of the stick." His eyes get teary and I just listen. "I--" His voice cracks, his teeth baring together for a second as he regains himself. "I should be dead. Not her. Not Nona."

I try not to overreact, mustering up the words of comfort my dad use to tell me when someone in our family passed away.

"Nikki, who lives and dies isn't suppose to be in our hands. And it's not unless we just decide to end our lives prematurely." I start, taking his hand in the both of mine. "You can't think that way because the plan God has for you and the plan he had for her are two completely different things. And you're still alive because you aren't done with what he has for you, yet. Nona's work down here is finished. Your's isn't. So don't think this is all for nothing because I promise you, it's not."

He doesn't even sneer at the word "God" this time.

"If there even is a God the only thing he has planned for me is to send me straight to hell." He states coldly, his tears drying.

A sick feeling of nausea rises in my throat at his words and I force myself to calm down before calling Tom to tell him we won't make it.

We watched Gilligan's Island the remainder of the day, while Nikki shot coke when I'd get up to use the bathroom.

And then Saturday night came.

"Thank you." I say to Tansy as she helps me get the last of my stuff out of my car.

I just got back from meeting Duff at their rehearsal space to get the last few things I left at their apartment. "How was the meeting?" I ask her, pertaining to the very reason she had to fly back to New York.

She gets quiet for a second before faking a smile the best she can.

"They did some test shots and are sending them to the magazine for review and they'll let me know if I got the job." She tells me.

"They called you, did they not?"

"Yeah, they did, but since it's been over a year since I was last photographed, they wanna see what they're working with." She explains and I raise a brow, getting a bad feeling as we walk to the front door of my house.

"Tansy, you can know you can talk to any of us if something's not right, right?" I remind her and she nods.

"If something weren't right I'd tell you." She assures me. "I'm just going through some stuff. It doesn't have anything to do with work."

"Tansy--"

"--Viv, I'm okay." She states, looking at me with a weak smile. "Now, go get ready so we can go out with the guys, and bombard them with album ideas because 'Theater of Pain' was not what it needed to be and we're gonna help them avoid mistakes like that again." She sighs out as I open the front door, chuckling.

I step in to the living room, about to head to our bedroom to get ready, but I'm caught off guard by Sparkie talking to a woman I've seen before.

Then I recognize her in a split second.

The raven hair, the smooth, darker skin, perfectly proportioned features and contagious smile.

Her brown eyes catch on me, her face shifts into an oddly joyous expression and she's standing up to greet me.

"How are you?!" She asks me excitedly, knowing who I am because of that night on the balcony in Tansy's New York apartment.

Tansy's expression let's me know she wasnt expecting to see her here.

Which means...

"Nikki invited me out with you guys since he knew I was friends with Tansalyn and she was gonna be back in L.A." She states, probably reading my confused look.

"Nikki?" I ask, raising a brow.

She blinks at me, unsure of something before saying:

"Well, y-you remember me, don't you, we've met before? I'm Vanity."

#nikki sixx #mötley crüe #the dirt #nikki sixx x oc #nikki sixx fanfiction #gateway drug

[a-crimson-lion]

Further Discussion On Katsuki Bakugo

[Original Post Here]

@homez18

...I seem to have stumbled upon a rabbit hole which my hubris continues to lure me towards.

Because I genuinely want to have a discussion over your points (and I don't want to bog down my original post with too many reblogs), I'll move the discussions here.

[This isn't necessarily to flaunt my nonexistent superiority. I honestly think that you have a good argument going for Katsuki. I'm just seeing how my own analysis stacks on top of that. I'm no expert, but I'll give it my best shot. Also, spoilers for anyone else reading.]

Let's start with "I don't think Bakugo overestimates himself." This is an interesting point, which I believe does hold water. When I think about it, I realize that Katsuki actually suffers from a different problem, which I'll get back to later. As for "He's never shown to overestimate himself," that's... not entirely correct. As of late, I can think of at least TWO examples in the series where Katsuki could legitimately be overestimating himself. But first, let's address the basic issue.

9 times out of 10, Katsuki will UNDERESTIMATE his opponents.

This isn't without reason. Katsuki's strong, and he knows it. He's been strong since even before his quirk manifested, at least mentally. When his quirk kicked in, his strengths shifted to primarily physical, though he's still an intelligent person. However, even if he can gauge his own strength, he does an admittably horrible job of gauging others' strengths. Since he's been praised for nigh over a decade for having such a strong quirk, Katsuki's got the idea that he's among the best of the best. He might not be #1 yet, but he knows he's gonna get there eventually. The problem starts when he decides that everyone else is beneath him by default.

Don't tell me he doesn't underestimate others either when he tends to call everyone "extras" or just a crappy nickname (at least until he acknowledges them).

One instance where Katsuki distinctly underestimates his opponent is during the Battle Trial with Izuku. Granted, this is more of a hubris case than anything, considering Katsuki's absolute hatred for Izuku (that later does mellow out into begruding respect). The thing is, Katsuki knows Izuku has a quirk now. He knows his quirk is super strong (it beat his ball throw by 0.1 meters, after all) but there's still a part of Katsuki that believes Izuku is still a bug. He's still a worthless Deku, and to top it all off, Katsuki is convinced that Izuku hid his quirk from him since the start.

While his absurd self-centered persona is not the main focus, one must admit that Katsuki's hubris is a certain level of concerning.

So Izuku and Katsuki have a big showdown, and to Katsuki's surprise, Izuku pulls something else entirely. He manages to wreck the building above them, taking the explosion and allowing his team to pass. Katsuki thinks Izuku is looking down on him, but Izuku simply states that he wouldn't have used his quirk if he could have thought of someone else. And as Izuku collapses and the trial comes to a close, Katsuki is shaken by the fact that Izuku beat him. Worthless Deku beat Katsuki Bakugo, and he wonders if Izuku could beat him in other ways. Katsuki underestimated Izuku.

I've talked about Katsuki's obsession with strength previously, but the same idea applies here. If Katsuki wasn't so gun-ho on taking out the enemy (specifically Izuku) for the hell of it and actually tried to win the exercise, he might have been able to beat Izuku. But he's so caught up in his definitions of strength and victory that he ultimately falls flat, underestimating his opponent's capabilities to win, even indirectly. This dame idea comes back to bite Katsuki when Neito Monoma briefly takes possesion of Katsuki's headbands (granted, he does get them back later) because Katsuki didn't even bother paying attention to him, once again underestimating him.

Now, as I've stated before, Katsuki has overestimated himself at least twice. The first time was with All Might during the Final Exams. When All Might brings up his handicap weights, Katsuki has the gall to say that All Might's handicapping is "insulting." Katsuki knows that All Might is strong, he knows that All Might is the NUMBER ONE HERO, and suddenly handicapping himself is insulting? Granted, that's the same attitude he had against Shoto at the end of the Sports Festival, but just to put this scenario into perspective:

Katsuki is a 15 year old hero in training with a powerful quirk, a few months of experience, and versatile experience with his quirk among other strengths (including Battle Tactics).

All Might is an adult (age unknown) Pro Hero with a powerful quirk, years of experience, and, as a Young Katsuki once said: "No matter how bad things look, he always wins in the end!"

To put it simply, Katsuki is a Level 15 going against All Might, a Level 200 (whose handicap probably brings him down to Level 100).

Combined with Izuku (a Level 10 on his own), they might be a Level 30 (50 if I'm being generous) but All Might is still twice their skill combined, and Izuku and Katsuki's troublesome dynamic make it even more of a hinderance to fight against him. Katsuki even tries attacking All Might multiple times, even though he fails consistently each time, doing virtually nothing to change his strategy. It gets to the point where Katsuki gets straight up KO'd because he can't acknowledge that All Might truly is leagues ahead of him. Objectively, Katsuki knows that All Might is on another level, but subjectively? Shouldn't be too hard to beat him.

How would he have passed without Izuku again?

The second time Katsuki overestimates himself is actually fairly recent. Before Izuku and Katsuki head off to intern under Endeavor, they have a meeting with All Might. During that meeting, Katsuki remarks that he's be able to use all of One for All's quirks right then and there, whereas Izuku has only learned to *bloop* with his first new quirk.

Again, Katsuki is only focusing in the physical aspect of things, in this case OFA. We don't know exactly what All Might and Izuku told him about it, but I'd like to think they'd at least cover the basics of OFA's sentience. That, and the fact that since Katsuki is in on the All Might Tea Parties now, wouldn't he at least hear about Izuku's vision when he was undergoing the Black Whip episode? It's already been established that Katsuki has a strong quirk and is physically strong to an extent, but we've seen time and time again that his emotional strength needs some growing time. Plus, it has also been established that OFA gets a boost when it's motivated to save people. Katsuki has no such motives unless it benefits him. He's giving himself too much credit claiming he'd master OFA at that point.

Phew, that was long.

Otherwise, the rest of your argument is fair, homez18. Katsuki does fight to prove himself. He fights (and succeeds) to prove himself during the Entrance Exam. He fights to prove himself during the Quirk Apprehension Test (getting 3rd place and "losing" to Izuku in the ball toss, which pisses him off). He fights to prove himself in the Battle Trial (which is why he's so torn when Izuku wins). He fights to prove himself during all the events after that, like the Sports Festival or the Villain Attack at Camp. He does all that to prove himself.

The problem arises when he shuts out virtually everything else.

Yes, he should be mad at Shoto for not going all out at Katsuki during the Sports Festival, but he heard Shoto's backstory. He KNOWS Shoto hated his fire side, and saw how adamantly he refused to use it. He might not have heard what Izuku said to him in their fight, but Katsuki is so stubborn that he refuses to realize that people have issues beyond Katsuki. Not going all out against him is a personal slight. Being too weak is a personal slight. No one wins.

During the Villain Attack at Camp, Katsuki has every right to defend himself. But he's not defending himself. He's seeking out conflict because to him, fighting is the best part of being a hero. If he was truly defending himself, he'd have headed back to camp with Shoto, even begrudgingly so. Instead, he ignores Mandalay's warnings just because she brought up something about Izuku, and then narrowly avoids getting cut immediately afterwards, foreshadowing his poor choices.

TL;DR Katsuki tends to underestimate others more than he overestimates himself, and while he does fight with a warped sense of honor, it doesn't make his actions any more "noble."

Thanks for reading, homez18. I hope you enjoyed, and if you didn't? Well, that's on me I guess...

-Crimson Lion (24 September 2019)

#bnha #boku no hero academia #mha #my hero academia #katsuki bakugo #katsuki bakugou #anti bakugo #anti bakugou #just a little bit #character analysis #character discussion #drabble #meta #response #long post

[rixxy8173571m3w1p3]

The Little Big Things (1/4)

(@ricksanchezdwc) So like we had done not too long ago, me, @hoodoo12 @porkchop-ao3 @rickstexaschick are doing the same prompt cause we all loved the idea.

__________

Chapter 1: The Phyto Princess

Within the span of time it took for him to pull out his portal gun, and type in the coordinates, you had already imagined about a dozen places, and twice as many scenarios.

Rick made it look so easy; twisting dials, and pressing buttons in order to get from point a, to point whatever, but without the proper coordinates and code input, one could scatter their fragments all across the cosmos, without the hope of joining back together all in one piece; the thought often a source of uncalled for anxiety. True, this wasn't like star trek, with its one episode plots, or backstory to reference when you least expected it, but a valid concern that you had yet to address; you blamed it on your curiosity. Having read the notes of Zeta-7s early portal gun schematics, there was the blemish of fear that arose when you least expected it. Sometimes, it didn't feel like it mattered all that much, especially when you were in one of your moods, but more often than not, you hoped Rick would never mess up; or be two cups of coffee short. Contributing factors to your anxiety included the day to day annoyances, time, or how your hair looked that day, but in another one of his attempts to brighten your spirits, he made plans for a surprise adventure; your assumption being anywhere away from buildings or people.

You knew he was trying his best to keep you happy, but you wondered sometimes what he'd say if you told him he didn't have to. It wasn't his job, but you refrained from telling him, because if it weren't for the fact that you trusted and adored Zeta-7, then you would have refused in favor of staying local more often, especially when you weren't in the mood. Oh, but where was the fun in that? Maybe, it'd help; likely it wouldn't.

Today, there were other things the matter, like the doubt which appeared when you recalled the memories from a false dream, and you were confused about what had been the reality and what had been the dream. With thoughts of the past, also came the remembrance of old regrets; many you thought you had buried under reasoning and change, but you were terribly human. You weren't a genius, and you didn't always think about what you'd say before you said them, so you made mistakes; a lot more than you'd care to admit. Because of this, you had been a source of concern, and added to Zeta-7s stress, and this made you stressed because he already had enough on his plate, and this made you worry for his well being. Waves of dread which would wash over you at the thought of getting lost, or forgetting him, misunderstanding, even while gripping his hand as sure and tight as you could when you stepped through the portal were but impediments to your happiness; the worry you felt for scenarios that hadn't occurred, these too fed the monster of anxiety.

It would be okay, you'd say to yourself. It should've been okay, to step through the portal as you had done so dozens of times before, but then there was your heart beating a mile a minute, begging otherwise. You've watched Zeta-7 do it hundreds of times as well, coming out safe and sound, so you could do this, and would do it. Still, what reason did you have to worry or doubt?

Well, there were places no one came back from; you've heard the stories, you listened to Ricks theories, but again they were stories; cautionary tales that taught lessons. And like now, you fought that lingering fear, the tingling in your limbs, the bloom of tightness in your chest, and made sure you still felt Rick's long, thin, bony fingers laced with yours, holding on for dear life while repeating you're little mantra. On the other side he was still there, and you felt his relief, and with your other hand, you shielded your eyes from the resplendence of the sun, until they could adjust to the scene around you. “Rick,” you gasped, glancing a little at everything; your confidence building as delight overcame your anxiety. “where have you taken me?”

This must have pleased him, cause when he smiled, every wrinkle spoke of his laughter, and his electric blues were brimming with happiness.“W-why don't you look and - and see?”

Curiosity got the better of you as you let go, but reassured by his gentle smiles, you explored what was all around you; his warmth one of the best certainties. All around, the landscape stretched, it curved and there were bends a little ways ahead; you could smell hints of petrichor, and the ground fertile and verdant, with patches of silver grass which whistled when touched. You wondered if they could do more than whistle; laughing because many thoughts of yours had been but a velleity, and you almost moved on, but when the fuzzy blades of grass leaned forward to pat you on the head before returning to their place, you gasped. Were they supposed to do that? Nearby, exposed roots shimmered, and when you approached them, they pulled away from the ground, and bowed in obeisance before returning to their place. You flashed Rick that look that said you were confused, and his mouth hung open in astonishment. Still, he hadn't said a word, and watched on; his hand moving a mile a minute as he took down notes.

Above your heads, were bell like flowers that changed their tune whenever you passed them, and the walkway was littered with mushrooms that made your skin tingle pleasantly when you sat upon them; as unsettling as it was, you were feeling good, as though they absorbed all the negative feelings, and left you with the good ones. Where your feet hung above the ground, an indigo milk cap sprung up so that you could step off. At this point you began to wonder if the forces and plants around you were bending at your will. Considering Rick hadn't warned you yet, or impeded your curiosity in anyway, then he was either waiting for you to ask, or he was studying you; as he usually would. “Rick,” you wondered, as you stepped over the small stones that buzzed like worker bees. “did we shrink, or has the world gotten bigger?”

“Well,” he chuckled, eager to hold on to your hand again. “it’s - it's neither. Everything here is bigger, while w-we remained the same. Neat isn't it?”

Neat was an understatement.

“It is,” You agreed, which made him stand a little taller, and smile a bit brighter. “but I could have sworn we stepped into a Honey I shrunk the kids movie or something. I guess not, but something strange is going on. Haven't you noticed? You probably have, but I just want to check.”

“You're right, I-I-I have, and it makes me wonder what w-would happen if you wanted the flowers to walk? I-I guess that sounds silly.”

“No,” You softened. “it doesn't, but I don't think it works that way. I'm not a god or anything, and I'm pretty sure fairy dust ain't going to cut it, and make these giants move. But if you want me to, I could try.”

The only giants you had ever seen were the western sequoias. You had walked amongst those natural giants, whose respective histories were their own, and you wouldn't question how they came to be; for they existed before you, before Rick. They were the testament of endurance, withstanding centuries of rain, fire, and growth, but here….like many things he showed you was a first. Curious as to what might happen, you thought about the orange star like flowers moving, and bending down to your level. And, because it was your will, they did.“Rick,” you continued, after your initial shock passed. “I'm not imagining things am I? Did…. did that just happen?”

Reading the results from his scanners, and checking the footage from his camera, he exclaimed. “It - it did. It really did!”

“Is that good? I don't know.”

With raised brow, he chuckled to himself, and put away his scanner, and notepad. “Gosh, y-you're just full of - of surprises aren’t you?”

“Honestly, I have no point of comparison. So you're going to have to be upfront with me, and tell me if I'm going to be okay.”

“Y-you're more than o-okay, you're perfect.”

____________

The sun bathed the earth in delicious warmth, the sparkling dew feeding the thirst of the green.

The pleasant sounds of humming, and their songs had become an uplifting melody. Like kisses upon your skin, the wind made you ticklish, and you needed Ricks assistance so that you wouldn't fall over laughing. It seemed you were sensitive to the environment, which made you go through waves of pleasant emotions, but it was exhausting. Hopefully your life force wasn't being absorbed by them.

“Rick, I think I hear music. Can you tell me why? Or is it my imagination?”

“I'll ugh - I'll be able to tell y-you in a jiffy.”

Flipping through his notes, his brow was raised in confusion. “Um, t-t-to be honest, this is the first time I've seen them act this - this way. They seem t-to be imitating a song, possibly from your subconscious. Do y-you recognize it? Does it - it remind you of anything?”

You stopped in your tracks, and took a moment to earnestly listen before you answered. “It reminds me of your ukulele being played on a refreshing afternoon.”

Eyes wide, you knew he was eager to hear more, curiosity coloring his response. “Is th-that so?”

“Yeah. I love hearing you play,” Which was very true. Rick was a wonderful musician, able to play almost any instrument he picked up. Other Ricks were probably just as talented, but unless they were the legendary Steinway, you doubted anyone could play with as much emotion. You continued. “and the happy sounds that are made in between your laughs, and the strumming of strings, and the way you look at me when you play. Goodness, it warms my heart, and makes me love you even more. You…you always have a way of stirring my emotions.”

“Y-you really like it that much?”

“Like it? I adore it, and your guitar playing too. Why, if I didn't know any better, I'd say you practically seduced me with those serenades on the front porch, and those evenings indoors when it was raining. I have no idea what you were thinking about at the time, but hopefully it was of me.”

Sentimental words always made him pliable, and he never really knew how to answer, or what the correct words should be, but he tried, and in his earnestness, he'd lean towards you as though he were about to kiss you, but he'd stop before doing so. As though he were reigning himself, he'd close his eyes, taking a few deep breaths before he'd continue. Pressing a light kiss on your forehead, he softened. “I - I always have you on my mind, though I-I didn't - it wasn't my intention back then to….I didn't know you felt that way. I'm not in the habit t-to seduce anyone or….” He faltered, his cheeks dusted in a lovely blush.

Silly man. One of these days, maybe he'd understand when you were flirting and teasing him, and not misconstrue your delight with accusations. You cupped his cheek, encouraging him to look at you. “You're so sweet. I know you wouldn't do that. But either way, I enjoyed it all the same.”

Leaning into your touch, you saw the beginnings of a smile, but his blush was still going strong. “Gosh, now I'm not s-s-so sure, but I - maybe I - oh, I'm s-sorry.”

“Don't be sorry dear. If I didn't want you to, I would have stopped you at the point when you first asked me over for dinner. I mean, I never really thought you were trying anything either. We were just friends, having a good time, and I fell in love with you. Maybe we should thank that ukulele of yours for all the happy hours we had singing silly little songs.”

“I ugh - I should have brought it with me then, because y-you like it.”

“There's always next time. Though, it's been awhile since you played. You must miss it.”

“I-I do,” he admitted, passing a hand through his hair. “but it's because I've been b-busy. I'm sorry a-about that too. I've been away and w-we haven't had much time to ourselves.”

“Rick it's okay, I understand. You have important stuff to do”

“You - you say that, but it bothers me when I have t-t-to leave you for extended periods at a time. I don't like it, and I-I guess maybe I'm being silly. That's what happens when y-you get old. You either want t-t-to be alone or have company all the time. What am I even saying? I'm going off on a-ag….”

Pressing a finger to his mouth, you quieted him. “You already do a great job in trying to make me happy, and I'm not disappointed.”

“Y-you're not?”

“Of course not. I mean, I can't help but miss you, but you've always been a busy guy. How you manage to make time for me and still have time for your hobbies is beyond me, but that's the thing about you Rick, you're not like most people. And every moment with you is wonderful. The question you should be asking is what have I done for you? What can I do to make you feel better?”

“By p-p-putting up with me.”

Pressing a kiss on his cheek, you giggled. “If you mean by loving you, then I'm on it.”

_____________

After a series of small, quick experiments, Rick had come to realize that these plants listened mostly to you and not so much him. Oh, he had his theories, a few of them making you giggle, but for the most part, this is what he understood.“These plants here, I-I had thought they were empathic, but they must - must be trying to trigger a response. I believe they are fascinated b-by you, because I've already spent many happy hours here on - on this planet, but you haven't.”

Placing your hands on your hips, it was your turn to raise a brow. “Rick, if you put it that way, then it means I'm trending.”

“Gosh, I-I-I suppose. Is that the terminology these days? Does it mean you're popular?”

Zeta-7 really could be adorable when he wasn't trying to be, especially when he wasn't always aware of what was current. “Yes, but what are you really saying?”

“That they must r-really like you,” he smiled, jotting down a few notes, before taking out his scanner, and checking the results. “and if I'm correct, then they prosper off these pleasant emotions of - of yours. How fascinating.”

“Can they hear my thoughts?”

“N-no mi corazón,” he chuckled. “they can feel you. Plants are - are surprising organisms—without brains and central nervous systems, they are still able t-t-to sense the environment that surrounds them. They - they can perceive light, scent, touch, wind, even gravity, and are able t-to respond to sounds, too. These plants here are a-a little different, and can sense your every emotions, reflecting your feelings, which I-I guess means you're currently in a pleasant mood.”

“Of course I am, it's beautiful here, and I'm with you.”

After you had said this, a gust of wind rushed by, which rustled the golden leaves, the force of it almost knocking you over, though Rick was quick to grab you by the waist. “Are y-y-you okay?”

You could hear the bell flowers ring, and quietly you thanked them and the forces at work around you, which seemed to bend and curve at your will; whose comedic timing was cliché to say the least. “I am now. Thank you Rick.”

Scratching the back of his neck, he let go, and made himself busy by scanning the branches and plant debris. “L-l-like you already said it's ugh - feels like a-a land for giants. I know their size is attributed t-t-to the mineral rich soil. And I-I thought it would be nice to spend a-a day here, but you look tired. Not t-to mention the plants behavior.”

“I'm not that tired. But man, it's incredible to be able to will the elements, but I'm sorry Rick, I kind of don't know what I'm doing here or whether I have any control over it. Imagine, that kind of power in the wrong hands could be dangerous. So, I'll try not to cause too much trouble.”

“It's okay, I'm sure y-you won't. I-I do wonder if they can understand what we're saying.”

With a shrug, you replied. “It's worth a try.”

You smiled up at the canopy of leaves, admiring the way the light filtered through the spaces in between. “We appreciate the hospitality, and the lovely music, as well as your stimuli. Oh, and as much as I appreciate you playing matchmaker, you don't have to try so hard. You see, we're already together,” you winked at Zeta-7, who blushed at the gesture. “but secretly, I think Rick's enjoying it. Either way, I hope you'll be kind to us.”

When you had finished, a mushroom ran by, and dropped a gift at your feet before returning to its place. You waited for Ricks approval before peeling back the leaves that were held together by dried vines, revealing a pair of matching bracelets, that seemed to be nothing more then weaved, golden branches. “I think this is for us. See?” you pointed to the inner branch. “This one has your initials.”

Scanning them, Rick found that they were safe, and you two proceeded to try them on, and all at once, you felt warmth wash over you as you glanced at Rick. And when he glanced at you, a vine began to grow and flower, decorating his bracelet in magnificent, lapis blue blooms. “Wow, that's - I've never seen anything like it.”

You haven't either, but that was thing, you always experienced new things when you were with him. Like now, you felt all jittery, and nervous, and when he took your hand to kiss it, your bracelet bloomed, and you just had to pull away, because it felt strange; like a little piece of you was taken away. “Rick, this place is something else. Are you sure it's safe?”

You wanted to be sure, because having him near you all of a sudden was overwhelming, like a dozen butterflies fighting the wind. What was with this place?

“Mhm, I'm sure. I've done extensive research over th-the last couple of weeks t-to make sure we can relax.”

“Really? Nothing toxic or poisonous? No animals or creatures to worry about?”

Taking your hand in his again, you felt a great calm, and the bloomed flowers grew, and vines spread; everywhere they touched, made you feel cozy, and sleepy. So, so sleepy. Perhaps you should say something, but he was happy, and you didn't want that smile to fade, and you allowed him to explain. “Creatures? No, not - not yet. Maybe in a-a couple of years, but not now. This planet is still fairly new, and there's no telling when it - it will be inhabited. For now there's just us, and these w-wonderful plants.”

It was going to be fine you told yourself, and smiling up at him, you replied happily, with a voice soft with affection. “Okay, whatever you say Ricky.”

And like a deep yearning, the vines on his bracelet grew three times their size, and stretched out, just to kiss your face a dozen times; they wanted to delight you. It scared Zeta-7 a bit, but you could only giggle, cause they were just like him; earnest, eager, and sweet.

TBC

#doofus rick #j19z7 #doofus rick x reader #rick sanchez dwc #dwc