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#Bucky barnes series
purple-babygirl · 2 days
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don't call me daddy V
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x little!f!reader Word count: 4,660 Summary : In a world where littles are openly themselves, they volunteer to help and be helped by willing caregivers. In spite of himself, Bucky finds himself stuck with one and to keep the nagging away, he has to learn how to be around her with everything that that entails. Warnings: crying, age regression, fluff, a little angst A/N: i would like to give credits for this part and its idea to🦊nonnie because without her ask there might've not been a fifth part to this story. Having said that, i'm thinking this should be the last part of the story because i am out of scenario your girl is empty. but anyway, please enjoy this one and have a tight hug xx💜💜
~
When they arrived back at her house, she was asleep in the passenger seat.
Bucky didn’t want to wake her up. He knew she barely got any sleep last night because of the mean cough she was suffering from and so he carefully carried her inside without a word.
His heart kept speeding up every time he would remember what she called him after taking her shot as he slipped her feet out of her shoes and socks and tucked her in her bed.
He frankly had no idea what he would do if she was to wake up little and if he was ready to be a good daddy to her. What if he messed up again? He seemed to be a pro at that.
Luckily, when she woke up later that night, she was her big self again and didn’t seem to have any recollection of calling Bucky daddy, or if she did, she didn’t mention it.
Bucky gave her her cough syrup and the rest of the meds, helping her go back to sleep as he presumed his place on the floor by her bed.
In a way he couldn’t explain, even her coughs were more comfort than the silence at his house, and definitely more comfort than his nightmares.
It was 12 days of little sleep, a lot of crying, meds, movies and sleepovers until she was fully cured again, and even though Bucky hated that she was sick, those seemed to have been some of the best days he’s ever gotten to live since he’s come back to himself.
He got to laugh with someone, care for someone, comfort someone and enjoy the company of someone. And not just anyone; it was her.
But something was missing still.
Bucky wanted her to call him daddy. More than anything and from the bottom of his heart, he wanted to deserve that name, that role.
What Bucky had noticed in the days he’d stayed at her place was that she had no family pictures at all.
She had framed pictures of friends, of herself, of Corgi, but none of family members.
It didn’t come as a surprise because she’d mentioned it to him before, and he just knew that if he wanted to be her caregiver, her daddy, Bucky had to prove to her that he was nothing like those who’d hurt her. He had to prove himself worthy of taking care of her; set himself apart from them.
And to do that, he had to know more.
“I see no family pictures anywhere,” Bucky spoke as he helped her plant the new tulips she had in place.
“Yeah, we’re not close.” She shrugged, hand stuttering just the tiniest bit in their movements.
“Can I ask why?”
She sighed, “why?”
“I’m trying to learn from the mistakes of others.”
She laughed, “really?”
“Really.”
Oh, this wasn’t a joke?
“You know you don’t have to do that anymore, right?” She couldn’t understand why he would want to try again when the report was handed and he was let off the hook.
“I want to. I really want to.” Bucky wished his gloved hands weren’t muddy as they were so he could touch her face.
He found himself craving physical contact around her more often than not.
“You finally believe in the power of the program?” She teased, keeping her focus on the flowers she was rooting.
“No, I couldn’t care less about the institution and its programs.”
“Not even Mrs. Morrison?” She joked again.
“I’m serious, doll.”
“Why then?” She dropped the bulbs, deciding to face Bucky.
“I want it because it’s you I’ll be daddy to.”
“They never loved me for who I was.” She answered his previous question and Bucky felt a pang at his chest.
He’s made her feel the same way.
He remained silent, not wanting to interrupt her in fear that she might stop.
“I always had to be a certain way, say certain things, act a certain way. Do what we say and then we’ll see if we can love you.”
Bucky might’ve been speechless, but his eyes spoke a million words, begging hers for forgiveness for his ignorant mistakes.
“That’s why it hurt so much when you showed me you didn’t accept the little version of me.”
“I’m so sorry-”
She shook her head, stopping him.
“I’ve been rejected for too long, Bucky, too many times. It took me a good while to finally believe that I was worth loving despite my quirks, ugly parts and possible mistakes. Took too long to teach myself that it didn’t matter if I cried all the time, was too clingy or too talkative; I was still lovable.” She pointed to her chest as she finished her words.
Bucky took his gloves off, pulling her in for a hug, unable to stop himself anymore. He had no words, only anger and remorse raging inside his chest.
“It takes you a while to unlearn stuff you’ve been taught your whole life by the people who were supposed to love you the most.” She whispered into his shirt.
“Doll, I’m so sorry,” Bucky whispered back.
“It’s okay.” She looked up at him, “I appreciate you, Bucky, I really do, but I don’t think I’m ready to lose everything I’ve built inside me if you decide in the middle of it that you weren’t fully ready to take on such a responsibility. I forgive you. I promise. But I don’t trust you enough to give up full control of myself and my life to you again. I’m sorry.” She pulled away from the hug, giving Bucky the option to walk away.
“Don’t be. I understand.” He remained in place.
“Are you gonna disappear now?” She wondered with a sad smile.
“No, you’re not getting rid of me so easily.” Bucky returned the smile, putting his gloves back on.
She smiled gratefully, “I don’t wanna lose you either. You’re such a great friend. And I owe you forever for taking care of me those past few days.”
“What if I prove myself to you though?” Bucky asked, dipping a tulip bulb in the soil.
“What?” She tilted her head in confusion.
“What if I show you how serious I am about this and prove myself worthy of you?”
“Bucky, you don’t have to do that. I know you have a life, responsibilities-”
“I want to do it. There’s nothing more important to me right now than this. And you.”
“If you’re doing this just because you can’t accept that you failed the program-”
“I swear on my ma’s soul, I want to do this. Because of you, doll. For you and with you.”
The words died on her tongue as she watched his sincere eyes implore hers.
“Would you give me a chance to prove myself to you? Please?”
“Okay, Bucky.” She swallowed, “one chance.”
“That’s all I need.” Bucky smiled.
~ After their conversation in the garden, Bucky had to go home.
She was not sick anymore and he didn’t have a reason to stick around. He also didn’t want to push her on the matter of regressing, so, respectful of her boundaries, he left.
His heart was heavy when he entered his empty apartment to nothing and no one. Being alone in here wasn’t something he enjoyed anymore.
It has been 2 days of intense research that Bucky has conducted on age regression and partners in little space when she texted him that night.
“Mr. Barnes, can you please come over?”
He wasn’t particularly happy about the fact that he was Mr. Barnes again, but he certainly was happy that she thought to text him when little. This was an improvement and it counted to Bucky.
“Will be right there, doll.” He texted back, running to his motorcycle.
~
Bucky took in a deep breath before knocking at her door, ready to prove himself a suitable daddy.
She opened with teary eyes, making Bucky’s heart sink.
“What’s wrong, doll?” Bucky asked as he stepped inside.
“I can’t open the pickle jar and now my hands hurt,” she cried, showing him the insides of her palms and how red they were from trying so hard to twist the cap on the glass jar.
She was indeed a little worried that Bucky might find this stupid, that he might yell at her or get upset because she was crying over something minimal in his eyes.
But that wasn’t the case at all. The man was just thankful that she was alright.
“Oh, doll,” Bucky sighed in relief, glad that she wasn’t actually hurt.
Until he remembered that this was a big deal to her. Her hands hurt and she was frustrated because the cap wouldn’t budge.
Moments like these definitely required a daddy.
“I thought Mr. Barnes could help,” she sniffled, her hand wiping under her nose, “metal arm.” She touched his gloved hand.
Bucky chuckled, taking the pickle jar out of her hand, “what if I can do it without the metal arm? What would you give me in return?”
“The biggest pickle?” She offered, wiping her tears away from her eyes, her crying stopping at once.
Bucky laughed at her innocence, “no, I want something else, doll.”
She tilted her head expectantly.
What could Mr. Barnes possibly want? Did he want the whole jar? Would he at least leave her one pickle? She was craving pickles-
“I want you to start calling me Bucky again. No more Mr. Barnes. Can you do that for me, doll?”
Oh, that was something she could do.
“Only if you can open the jar with your not metal hand,” she challenged, her little mind amazed by the idea because look at her hand! It had red marks all over when she tried opening that jar.
“You got it,” Bucky said, easily twisting the cap on the jar open, making her mouth open with it.
“Woah,” she whispered as Bucky handed her the jar with a laugh.
“You’re welcome, doll.” He smiled, watching her chew on a crunchy pickle.
“Thank you, Bucky.” She smiled back, offering him a big pickle.
Bucky’s nerves tingled, knowing he was one step closer to her and his desired title.
~
Moving forward, Bucky learned to distinguish between her big self and little self through texts.
Her little self would always talk about him and herself in third person.
Plus, her big self always needed help with bigger things like needing Bucky to fix her sink or look at her car, knowing he might burn down the city if she went back to asking Adam for help with those things.
Her little self, on the other hand, would need help with the lighter things, the sweeter things. She would call asking for help with Corgi, something too high on a shelf or even just wanting Bucky’s company.
Tonight was one of those nights.
It was thundering more than usual and Bucky had wanted to go and be with her, but he didn’t want to invade her privacy.
But then she called and her scared voice saying his name had Bucky moving even before she uttered the words.
He was proud that she now knew that he was just only one call away; that he would come running whenever she needed. She could finally count on him to be there for her and he couldn’t be more contented.
He knew that consistency was important in relationships, especially one where she was little.
“Hey, doll, it’s okay. It’s just a little thunder,” Bucky cooed, rubbing her back as she let him inside.
“I’m not scared anymore now that Bucky is here.” She smiled, her breathing visibly slowing down.
“Well, I’m staying the night so you have nothing to worry about,” he chuckled, following her to the bedroom.
“Bucky covered his motorcycle?” she asked, worried his vehicle would get ruined.
“Leave that for now, we’ll hose it down together tomorrow when it’s sunny.”
“Corgi loves the hose,” she spoke out the first thought that came to her mind and Bucky loved it, laughing heartily at her comment.
The dog’s ears perked at the sound of his name, jumping at Bucky’s feet as soon as he entered the bedroom, waiting for his share of pets.
He bent down to give the dog some love when he heard her sigh.
“Corgi loves Bucky too.” She smiled shyly, internally wishing her name was Corgi.
“Bucky loves Corgi right back,” Bucky whispered, leaning in to kiss her forehead.
She only smiled bigger, running to her bed and getting under the covers.
When Bucky got down to sleep on the floor that night, however, she slipped off her bed and right next to him.
“Doll, the floor is too cold for you. Sleep on your bed, come on.” Bucky sat up, wanting to help her up on the bed again but she wouldn’t move.
“Wanna be next to Bucky,” she said with a pout.
“But-”
“I know Bucky can’t sleep on beds. It’s okay. Doll will sleep here,” she told him, squeezing Wolfie in her arms.
Bucky’s heart fluttered and it made his mind light up with an idea only a true daddy would have.
“Do you wanna build a fort?” He suggested and her face instantly beamed with a smile as she nodded.
Of course she did!
That night as Bucky gathered all of her soft blankets to make her a floor mattress inside a fort full of fluffy pillows, he knew he was smitten.
This girl had him head over heels for her and there was nothing in the world that he wouldn’t do just to see her smile.
“Can Bucky please tell me a story?”
“Sure, doll. Do you have any books I can read to you from?”
“I have books that big me likes but I don’t want those.”
“What would you like then?”
“I want a story that is Bucky’s. Tell me a story you didn’t tell anyone at the institution.”
Oh, she was jealous. The thought made Bucky smile as he pulled the covers up to her neck to make sure she was warm down on the floor.
“Okay, you ready?” Bucky asked, dimming the lights in her room.
She made herself comfortable under the covers, big eyes watching Bucky’s handsome grin as the cozy atmosphere he’s created comforted her through the storm, “ready.”
“Once upon a time, there was a small idiot who picked up fights with boys much bigger than himself. His name was Steve…”
Bucky fell asleep with his hand stroking her hair, watching her soft breaths leave her chest that night without abruptly waking up in the middle of it for the first time in forever.
~
Bucky didn’t know what it was like to be her, but he was going to do his best to put himself in her shoes like she’d previously tried.
She deserved to be fully and entirely understood.
He witnessed a glimpse of her feelings towards the concept of family a couple of times when they would watch movies like The Lion King or Lilo and Stitch.
She didn’t seem to be affected by the death of Mufasa even though he knew her to be a very sensitive little. She was sad for Simba, of course, but not for Mufasa’s demise. Similarly with Lilo and Stitch, she didn’t care much about the concept of the family.
There was an actual barrier separating her from experiencing any positive feelings that came with the idea of family. Because she had none to associate with hers.
With some more research, Bucky managed to find a few animated movies that didn’t seem to revolve around the idea of family love and how family was everything and whatnot.
One of those movies was The Willoughbys. The movie depicted how neglecting some parents can be and that 2 people loving each other and getting married didn’t necessarily mean they would love their children too.
It was a very unique movie and Bucky was actually happy they could make such movies nowadays.
When the song I Choose You started playing in the movie, Bucky felt her small hand squeezing into a fist.
He silently wrapped his hand around hers, offering quiet comfort and support.
He looked down to see tears in her innocent eyes as she showed her feelings for the first time during one of their movie nights.
 “Bucky chooses me?” she croaked, lip trembling as she cried.
“Bucky chooses you, doll. Wholeheartedly.” Bucky reassured, bringing her knuckles to his lips.
“I choose Bucky, too.” She pulled him down by one cheek to leave a kiss on the other.
Bucky froze.
It was the first time she’s kissed him since he applied that cream on her burnt hand back at his house. She did it on her own, too.
“And I choose Corgi,” she said, running her fingers through the hair of the puppy sleeping soundly on her lap.
“That’s right, and Corgi chooses you. Family doesn’t have to be the ones you were born with, doll,” Bucky told her as he wiped her tears away, “you can choose the family you want for yourself”.
“Thank you, Bucky.” She hugged him tight, afraid he might not be real and that this moment is all made up.
“You’re welcome, doll.” Bucky kissed the side of her head as they pulled away.
“Can I choose Adam, too?” she asked, voice barely above a whisper as she gauged Bucky’s reaction.
She could actually hear his chest rumble with a low “argh” before he nodded despite himself, making her giggle.
“Don’t worry. I only have one Bucky.” She reassured, slinging her arm around Bucky’s metal one.
One daddy, she wanted to say, but she couldn’t. She was still scared.
~
Bucky knew that she needed her own independent time alone sometimes even when little, and he would allow her just that, texting throughout the day just to make sure she was okay, reminding her to drink water and take care of herself.
But there was one particularly hard weekend when she felt real down about some of her plants dying as the storm took them out of the ground.
When she opened the door she was clearly disheveled, hair all messy and looking like it hadn’t been brushed all week.
“Hey, doll,” Bucky spoke gently as he closed the door behind him.
She quickly ran into his arms, needing the comfort more than anything, “my plants are dead and Corgi peed on my new carpet and my hair doesn’t smell like shampoo anymore and I’m-”
Damn. She was spiraling. She just slipped out of his hug and on the floor. Oh no.
“Hey, hey, it’s okay. You’re okay. I’m here now and I got you, okay?” Bucky tried his best to reassure her, getting on his knees before her to look into her eyes.
“Okay,” she hiccupped, nodding even though she wasn’t fully convinced.
“What happened to the plants?” Bucky wanted to handle her concerns one at a time.
“My apple trees were pulled out of place because of the storm,” she started sobbing again as she remembered what had happened to her hard word.
“Okay, okay, tell you what, I’ll put them back in place, okay?”
“Really?” She sniffed.
“Really.” Bucky smiled kindly.
“Okay.” She nodded, trying to control her breathing.
“And we’ll throw the new carpet in the washing machine, and keep Corgi in his playpen with pee pads,” Bucky gave her the steps of how the day was going to go, leading her by the hand to where Corgi was.
“Okay.” She nodded again, her tears ceasing.
“And while the carpet is being washed, I’ll help you wash your hair. Does that sound okay?” Bucky asked her permission, wanting to make sure she was completely comfortable.
“Yes.” She was finally smiling again as well.
“Okay, let’s get you in here,” Bucky told the puppy before placing him inside his playpen.
He spread a few sheets on which the dog could pee if needed before collecting the affected mat.
“Let’s take this to the washing machine,” Bucky voiced his movements, wanting to put her at ease as he kept her hand in his and walked with her to the bathroom.
“In you go.” Bucky threw the rug inside the washing machine along with some detergent.
“Now what do we do?” He asked her, wanting to keep her out of her head.
“Wash doll’s hair?” She asked with half a smile.
“That’s right, get in there.” Bucky tilted his head towards the bathtub with a smile.
And for some reason, it was different this time. He didn’t feel all weird seeing her naked. Maybe it was because he knew her better this time and was familiar with her in more ways than one that such intimacy didn’t startle him. He wasn’t sure, but Bucky wasn’t complaining, only grateful as she closed her sweet eyes and trusted him to wash her hair for her.
~
“Alright, show me how it’s done,” Bucky encouraged, instructing her to whip her hair to the front so he could wrap the towel around it.
She did as told with a giggle, dangling her hair before her and letting Bucky wrap it up the best he could.
“Off to the couch.” Bucky chuckled as he watched her skip in her cashmere bathrobe to her couch.
Later after Bucky has brushed her hair for her, he helped her get dressed and they went outside together to replant the fallen apple saplings the wind had knocked down just like he promised.
The smile on her face was new and unmatched as she watched Bucky handle her plants with care.
“Thank you, Bucky.” She hugged him close, hardly wanting to let go as they stood in the middle of her garden.
Bucky was now rooted in her heart just like the plants in her gardens were in their soil.
She didn’t think she could be away from him anymore. She didn’t want to be away from him anymore.
“Daddy, I’m hungry,” she whispered timidly as they started walking back to the house.
“What do you want on your piz- what did you say?” Bucky stopped in his tracks.
“I’m hungry.” She bit her lip and looked away quickly, hesitant now that his eyes were on her.
“Before that, doll.” Bucky brought her eyes back to his by her chin.
“D-daddy?”
Bucky smiled a smile that reached his eyes as they lit up with gratitude. He couldn’t believe he was finally hearing that word.
“Daddy’s thinking pizza, doll. Sound okay?”
Her face glowed up with her own smile as she witnessed Bucky, with full commitment, refer to himself as daddy.
She nodded, knowing this was going to be the most delicious pizza she was ever going to eat.
~
“What is daddy thinking?” she asked when she noticed his eyes on her, slipping a loose strand of hair behind Bucky’s ear.
“Just thinking about all the things you make me feel, doll.” He smiled, turning his face to kiss her hand before it left his face.
Her face started heating up as she retracted her hand, tingles spreading all over her, “things like what?”
“You make me feel like there’s still good in this world. Like I’m worth patience and kindness and maybe even… love,” Bucky voiced his feelings, eyes dreamy as they watched her pretend to be focused on organizing her stuffies’ seats on the floor.
“You are, daddy,” she replied sincerely, hurting inside that Bucky might doubt this even a little.
“I can’t believe I was so horrible to you, doll.” Bucky’s sigh came out hot from his chest, holding so much regret.
“That’s in the past, daddy. Doll doesn’t think about it no more.” She smiled, her littler hand covering his own lovingly before giving a soothing squeeze.
“You’re just perfect, aren’t you?” Bucky held her hand up and gave the back of it a noisy kiss.
She laughed, face heating up more at the sweet attention, “no body’s perfect, remember?”
Bucky tried to continue laughing with her but he was still kicking himself for what he did to her during her visit to his house.
“How did you even tolerate me back then, doll? I was the worst.” Bucky covered his face with his hands as he threw his head back, laying on his back on the floor full of shame.
“That’s not true. You just misunderstood me and that happens!” She was quick to defend him, refusing the idea that he would even criticize himself, “daddy is the best.”
“I know, but it still gave me no right to treat you the way I did.” Bucky’s eyes teared up at the memories of his very mean words and actions, “I made you cry a lot.” He struggled to forgive himself for that one.
“Daddy, I forgave you, I swear,” she promised, her hands cradling his full cheeks.
She felt like her heart might stop from sadness if Bucky was to cry right now.
“I’m really sorry. I’m really really sorry, doll.” Bucky’s eyes were sincere, holding so much emotion in them that she felt her own begin to fill up with tears.
“Daddy, you don’t need to apologize no more,” she whispered, doing her best to hold back tears.
“You have made me the luckiest man on earth by accepting me as your caregiver, your daddy, and you’ve taught me so much, doll.” Bucky actually started crying, a lot of held-inside feelings coming out at once.
“Daddy.” Her thumb wiped under his eyes gently as she felt her own tears roll down, “don’t say stuff like that”.
“But I need to. Because you did. You taught me unconditional love and acceptance. You taught me what it means to live again. Doll, your patience with my terribleness has taught me that maybe I’m not a hopeless case after all, and that this shell of a man with a metal arm might be capable of things he thought have been wiped from his memory long ago.”
“Daddy, please stop crying,” she sobbed, pressing her forehead to his chin as her attempts at wiping his tears away have proven to be futile.
“I love you so much, doll. I love you with every old bit of me and if you’ll have me…”
“Daddy?” she raised her head, eyes on Bucky’s face, trying to read his expression.
Could Bucky really be asking what she thought he was asking?
“Doll, I want you to be my baby for more than just a few days. Would you give me that honor? Would you let me be your daddy for real?”
“Daddy, are you sure?” she nervously bit her lip.
“I’ve never been more sure of anything more.” Bucky promised.
She nodded frantically, afraid the offer might disappear if she took too long to respond, “yes.”
“Thank you, doll.” Bucky breathed as he pulled her to him, strong arms engulfing her in a protective hug.
“Daddy will not regret it later?” her eyes watched him, a small hint of doubt still tainting her trust.
“Do you like the moon, doll?”
“Yes.” She tilted her head, not understanding the relation between her question and Bucky’s answer.
“You know how our sky only has one moon?”
She nodded.
“My heart is just like that. It can only have one doll no matter how much time passes.”
“Oh.” She sniffled, trying to hold the tears in.
“I love you, doll.” Bucky gave her hair a long kiss.
“I love you, daddy.” She kissed his chest, her arms tightening their hold around him as best as she could, never wanting to be away from him again.
And she wasn’t going to be. Bucky was an idiot who let her go once; never again was he going to make that mistake.
He was blessed with her now and he was going to spend every day of his life proving he was worthy of this blessing.
~
Tag list:
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Imagine Alpine waking up you and Bucky cause she’s hungry or she just wants attention from her mommy and daddy🥰🩵🩷
Just Like Her Dad
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PAIRINGS: James "Bucky" Barnes x Girlfriend!Reader
WARNINGS: Extreme fluffiness (pun intended)
WORD COUNT: 364
*not proof-read*
ENJOY!
The afternoon sun shines brightly through the open blinds, indicating the day is nearly half done. Bucky and you sleep in after staying up all night to watch the entire Hobbit series.
You feel Bucky wrapping an arm around your back pulling you close, and you nudge your nose against his chest inhaling his woodsy scent. You just lay in each other's arms, wanting to soak in the presence of the other.
Suddenly, a mass jumps on the bed. Then jumps on your side, and you let out an 'oof'.
Turning around, you see Bucky's white cate, Alpine. She chews on your covers and you start to chuckle.
"Aw, hello there baby," you pick her up and cuddle her close your chest. She purrs and rubs her head against your collarbone.
Bucky clears his throat, and opens his eyes to see the view in front of him. "Mornin' Alps," he rubs her chin, and Alpine moves away from Bucky and closer to you.
You both are in shock.
"Someone has a favourite," he grumbles and rubs his eyes, trying to wipe the sleep away. You laugh and coo and the little furball. "No she doesn't," you argue playfully, adjusting the little pink bow you tied on a small clump of her fur at the top of her head last night. Bucky looks at you with a look that just says 'are you kidding me?'.
"She doesn't!" You laugh harder and your grin windes, "Buck, I'm serious she doesn't like me more." Bucky turns and lies flat on the bed as he nods sarcastically, "sure."
Alpine purrs loudly and snuggles closer to your body, Bucky laughs and raises a brow at you, "see."
You shake your head and hug the cat closer, "Alpine, do you like me or you're Daddy more?" Alpine meows and licks at your jaw, pronoucing her choice.
You gasp while Bucky laughs, "I told you, she LOVES you more."
You shake your head as you laugh with Bucky, "well it just proves one thing." Bucky looks at you curiously, reaching over and starts to play with your hair lazily, "yeah?"
You hum and nod, "she's just like her dad." You wink at him.
💌💌💌
So fucking mad at Marvel, for not including Alpine in TFATWS.
Like besties, we were ROBBED.😩😩😩
LOVE THIS ASK, ALWAYS ON DECK FOR WRITING ALPINE.
Till' then,
Stay Coquette-y,
Anya 🫶🏽🕊️🎀
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imtryingbuck · 3 days
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Forty Five
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Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem!Reader
Summary: Bucky comes from a well respected family, he falls in love with a girl who prefers the simple things in life. Follow their journey through the years.
Word count: 1,483
Warnings: angst, heavy use of pet names. fluff. swearing. Domestic abuse mentioned. This one is short, im sorry.
A/N: No description of reader other than she has curly hair.
Masterlist   Series Masterlist
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‘Grace and Bunny’s Haven’
Each letter engraved in the bricks bold and proud on the administration building. Behind it stood the housing unit which looked more like a manor than anything. There was large fence that sounded the whole property, the gate opening for safety to those who needed it, right where her former home use to sit.
True to his word Bucky let Y/n bulldoze the remains of the house she spent her early childhood being tortured in. Surprisingly it was very therapeutic for her. The massive smile on her face when the remains went down made Bucky’s heart tingle.
In five years the woodland that once was a sanctuary for Y/n had been transformed into a sanctuary for women in need.
The manor had twenty bedrooms with the same amount of bathrooms, at the time of opening there was only ten available rooms as the rest were still being done up. A large and spacious kitchen, two large living rooms, a huge dining hall, a kids play room that had already been filled with books and toys that were either donated or brought new. There was a day room at the back that had a skylight, it was beautiful in the summer. Two rooms on the lower floor was to be used as counselling rooms Y/n had already hired councillors and actually let them have their say on how the rooms were decorated.
On the grounds there was a park for children with slides, swings, seesaws and other fun little things for children. Sam just had to go on the slides and swings to make sure they worked, so he said. On the other side there was a green house, it was something that her mama always said she wished she had.
Owners of furniture stores were kind enough to donate furniture for each of the rooms, people went through their homes finding things that could be donated when word got out about Grace and Bunny’s Haven, a lot of children things ranging from clothes, shoes, books and toys were mainly donated. A couple came with a moving van and gave Y/n cots for babies, pushchairs, highchairs and many other different things for babies, they explained that they use to run a day-care out of their home, they retried two years prior they no longer needed them. Y/n could have cried as she hugged them and thanked them.
The finishing touches were being done when a woman no older than twenty five showed up seeking safety with her two three year old twins. Charlotte became the first person to be under their protection.
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The doors opened two days after Y/n’s forty fifth birthday and already five rooms were being used. Charlotte and her twins taking up one room seeking safety from her abusive ex boyfriend, Maryanne was in her mid-thirties and had a son who was seven years old. Carla had five children with her when she showed up covered in bruises, she and her youngest had a room together whilst the other four had the room next to hers. Robin was the youngest out of the women at nineteen, when Y/n heard her story it broke her heart, poor girl had gotten pregnant when she was seventeen two months before she gave birth her boyfriend had been killed in a car crash, hers and his family had turned their backs on her and the baby for over a year she bounced from one place to the next with her daughter until she found a flyer at the hotel she managed to save enough money to stay at for a few nights. The next day she showed up asking for help.
All of the children got along with each other, unknown to them they had actually broke the ice between their moms as none of them knew what to say to the other. Now the four women were friends and helped each other out when needed.
“I’m proud of you, you know that don’t you?” Bucky asked after handing Steve another box of things that had been donated.
“I couldn’t have done it without you Ducky”
“I didn’t do anything my love”
“You brought the land, got everything ready-slow down Luca or you’ll trip-” Luca was the second oldest of Carla’s, he was running past the administration building to go and play on the park with the other children.
“But you’re the one giving these women hope and safety, not me I’m just doing all the heavy lifting”
“Heavy lifting? Buck you keep picking up boxes full of clothes” Steve shouted from the storage room.
“Fuck off. Do you need me to do anything Bun?”
“Nope, actually you could help Steve we got a rather large donation in last night so”
“I can do that, gimme a kiss first”
Kissing Bucky before he went over the storage room, Y/n stood at the front desk with a smile on her face. Proud of how everything turned out, proud of the fact that she could help women who needed it. Every time the moms saw her they thanked her, every time, even though she told them that they didn’t need to thank her at all, they still did.
Wanda had come and brought the twins along with Y/n’s and Bucky’s children who were all currently playing tag with the other children, their laughs brought a smile to her face. When the gates came open and a police car drove up to the administration building, this wasn’t new as Maryanne and her son was brought to her in a police car, what was new though was that instead of a woman sitting in the back it was a man.
“Morning Mrs Barnes” Officer Jones greeted as he got out of the driver seat.
“Morning, who is he?”
“He needs safety and yes I know this is a place for women but he needs help, no one else is willing to take him in”
“Oh. Right well let’s get him in so I can interview him” Bucky’s eyebrows furrowed when he saw his wife walking in front of a man and two little kids and Officer Jones, he gave Y/n a questioning look that she just waved off.
Y/n offered a seat to the man and told the two young children play with the toys that were in the room whilst Officer Jones stood at the door. “Hi I’m Y/n, your name is?”
“Henry. Look I understand if you can’t take me in just say no so I can fin-“
“Who said I can’t take you in?”
“I’m a man”
“And? Just because you’re a man doesn’t mean anything. How about you give me the rundown of why you are looking for help and-“
“So you can judge me?”
“Why would I judge you?”
“Because I’m a man, a man that would get beat the shit out of him by his wife. The mother of his two kids, been put in hospital more times than I can recall, never once laid a hand on her. Never. I’m a man who’s now seeking help at a place that was made just for women, bet you think I’m weak don’t you?”
“You’re not weak because you married an abuser Henry. You’re not weak for coming here asking for help. You’re not weak at all so please do not think that about yourself”
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry I-I-I didn’t mean to snap. I promise”
“It’s okay, Henry look at me, it’s okay I promise. How about you tell me about your babies, yeah?”
“My oldest is Robbie he’s five, youngest is Lucy she’s two”
“Five and two, how old are you?”
“Thirty three ma’am.”
“Have you filled for divorce?”
“Yes but she refuses to sign them”
“Okay, can you write down any allergies you and the kids have and any medication you or they need please?”
“W-what?”
“Allergies and medication…”
“No I understand that b-but are you really letting us stay here?”
“Of course I am, Grace and Bunny’s Haven is a safe place for everyone who’s victim of domestic abuse. A room is already set up for you, I’ll give you the tour when you are ready”
“Tha-thank you, thank you so much”
After giving Henry and his children a tour, she introduced him to the women who was understandably nervous but they trusted Y/n’s judgement, they knew that she wouldn’t bring a man into their sanctuary if he wasn’t trustworthy or had gone through what they had gone through themselves.
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Getting home that night Y/n had a hot shower whilst Bucky got the children into bed, she was proud of what she had created and though she had some understanding of what these women and man was and had gone through it didn’t stop her from getting emotional thinking about the pain they went through.
Bucky held her tight that night as they slept.
<Previous Next>
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Love is a Choice (chapter five - finale)
Main Navigation || Bucky Barnes Masterlist “Love is a Choice” Masterlist
Pairing — Bucky Barnes x Agent f!Reader Series Summary — In your experience, relationships only bring drama and heartbreak, and you want absolutely none of it. That is, until an act of sheer recklessness brings Bucky Barnes back into your life.
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Warnings — Angst, more blood and injury, devastating revelations (but nothing we didn’t already know!), and if it’s any consolation, I concluded this on a happy note with some fluff and a non-explicit smut scene at the very end. That’s pretty much it!
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Love is a Choice
Chapter Five (finale)
Bucky’s metal arm whirrs with a barely audible hum, the vibranium plates shifting to optimize for combat as he steps into the fray. Bullets splinter the air, a savage symphony of chaos and destruction. His instincts, honed through countless battles, snap into focus as he catches a glint of danger in his periphery. 
With one fluid motion, propelled by a potent blend of adrenaline and fear for someone other than himself, he lunges. The Hydra agents, clad in their nondescript tactical gear, might as well be faceless nameless drones, but each represents a threat to you and your safety. 
And he can’t have that. In the shattered peace of the northern Canadian wilderness, he becomes the storm. 
He runs out of bullets pretty fast, so he tosses his rifle aside and lets his fists do the rest. They come down on his enemies like iron, his movements a blur—a dance of destruction honed by decades of stride. 
The air is filled with the clamour of combat, grunts and thuds of flesh and cracking bones, punctuated by the sharp cracks of splintering wood as his precious cabin bears witness to a battle between his indomitable will and a relentless tide of adversaries. 
Bucky fights with the ferocity of a man who knows the stake of every punch thrown, every kick landed. Each surge of his enhanced muscles, every pivot and parry, speaks to a silent promise he’s made to the woman in the cabin behind him—a vow to protect, to endure, to never yield until the cavalry of red, white, and blue storms over the horizon. 
“Come on, Steve,” he mutters under his breath, keeping one eye above the tree line. He can almost picture Steve’s disapproving frown at the recklessness he knows all too well in himself, but for Bucky there’s no room for doubt or hesitation. 
He will not fall, not when the mission of his life is on the line. 
“Stand down, Soldat,” one of the agents has the audacity to admonish him, pointing a rifle right at Bucky’s forehead. The latter practically growls, his chest swelling with a sense of satisfaction at the way the agent takes an uneasy step backwards. 
“That’s not my name,” Bucky snarls, his metal hand darting out so quick that the agent doesn’t have the time to register the movement. He grasps the barrel of the rifle, easily twisting it backwards and rendering the weapon utterly useless. 
His other arm then swings in a wide arc, his fist connecting with the agent’s jaw in a grim percussion of bone and sinew. His focus is sharp, each movement calculated, as he pivots and delivers a kick that sends another agent flying across the clearing. 
Suddenly, his thoughts loop back to Alpine’s serene gaze, one that’s saved him so many times since he’s come here. To Steve’s brotherly admonition, ones that always made him roll his eyes but smile at the same time. To you; a vision of your gentle eyes, the melodic cadence of your voice, and the feel of your lips against his. 
It’s for you, all of you—a feline’s contented purr, a friend’s unwavering loyalty, and a lover’s unspoken pact, all rolled up in the promise of warmth—that Bucky wills his body to endure, to become both shield and sworn against the encroaching darkness. 
Blood slicks his knuckles, the skin there now split and raw, his breathes coming out in harsh drags, hot and ragged against the winter chill. 
Keep them safe. Those three words are a mantra that pulses in his veins, louder than the ringing in his ears, more insistent than the fatigue that claws at his limbs. 
But then a sharp pain blossoms across his ribcage, one Hydra agent having found purchase with a serrated blade. Bucky grunts, twisting away, pressing his hand against the wound. The sensation of being outgunned begins to settle like lead in his gut, and he scans for an opening, any respite, but finds none. 
A searing heat lances through his thigh, a bullet finding its mark despite his enhanced reflexes. The force staggers him, and for a moment, the battle dims to a distant thunder. Bucky drops to one knee, feeling the warm wetness spreading down his leg, the coppery scent of his own life force spilling onto the snow. 
He clutches at the wound, his face contorting in not just pain, but in a sudden, piercing fear. 
It cuts deeper than any knife, more devastating than any bullet—the realization that he might not walk away from this, that the story he shares with you might end in a cold and lonely epilogue. 
Bucky thought he had been prepared to die for you out here, if it meant buying the rest of the team enough time. But damn it, he almost laughs, he’s afraid. 
After all this time, after all those days wishing he were dead, the will to live strikes him like a lightning bolt. He wants to finish this, to go back to you and reaffirm the words he’d been so scared to say to you in New York, but had come so easily in the moments just before he left you under the trap door. 
He wants your mornings, your touches, to turn those dreams of his that always seemed so distant into reality. 
And so he embraces the fear and pushes the doubt aside, buries it beneath layers of sheer grit and will, pushing against the ever-present spectre whispering of rest. He can’t stop here, not yet. 
Bucky rises once more to meet the onslaught. The air is thick with the scent of carbon and burning flames, and although the odds are daunting, relief suddenly floods his veins. There is a rumbling just beyond the trees, the ground beneath him quaking from the force of an impending arrival. 
A shadow sweeps over the battlefield, massive and imposing, a familiar silhouette of salvation. Bucky looks up through lashes wet with sweat and blood, just as the sleek shape of a quinjet cuts across the night sky, a beacon of hope amidst the chaos. 
The Avengers are here. 
Bucky continues to fight, not just for life, but for every memory yet to be made, for every smile you might grace him with, for every gentle touch of Alpine against his skin, all in a world where peace is more than just a fleeting dream. 
For the chance to love again, without the shadow of grief and guilt looming over him. Because while there’s so much worth dying for, there is infinitely more worth living for. 
The roar of the quinjet’s engines drown out the symphony of battle. Steve, of course, is the first to emerge, his shield a bright disk against the gloom, catching the light as if to banish the darkness that’s come to consume his friend. 
Close behind, Sam soars under the cover his mechanical wings, a guardian angel clad in steel and resolve. Wanda’s crimson energy dances at her fingertips, her eyes glowing red as she rains hell down on her foes,  barely a foot out of the jet’s doors. 
Natasha’s movements are a silent ballet, deadly and precise, while Clint’s arrows never fail to find their marks. Even Tony Stark, encased in his gleaming red and gold armour, lands with a ground-shaking thud, his repulsors already humming with lethal intent. 
Together, the team moves as one. Bucky watches, his breath hitching, the weight of his body dangerously tempted to yield to the exhaustion, as his comrades turn the tide. 
Clint lands at his side, and despite the circumstances, cracks a smile. “C’mon, Tin Man, hold yourself together.” 
“Ugh, you’re about damn fucking time,” Bucky groans. He will never admit it, but he’s never been happier to see Clint or his dumb little smirk. 
“Tony, Sam, secure the perimeter,” Steve calls out, his voice a steady drumbeat against the turmoil. The two don’t need to be told twice before they’re flying off, taking down more agents on the way like they’re nothing more than falling autumn leaves. 
“Natasha,” Bucky manages, his voice hoarse with exertion and urgency. “She’s in the cabin. Keep her safe.” 
“Already on it,” she replies, her tone sharp and sure as the knives at her belt. She slips away like a wraith, darting towards the wooden sanctuary where you remain hidden from the carnage, her red hair flying in the wind behind her. 
The fight rages on, but now with the might of the Avengers tipping the scales. Bucky feels the burden on his shoulders ease every so slightly, even as his body protests each movement. He fights with the knowledge that you will be safe, that Natasha will guard you with the same ferocity with which he’s been battling. 
Together, the team turns the tide, the remaining Hydra agents falling one by one until the forest floor lays littered with the vanquished. Bucky stands amidst the ruin, his breaths coming out in shallow gasps, the world around him narrowing to pinpricks of light against a closing curtain of darkness. 
His muscles tremble with the aftershocks of battle; each heartbeat deafeningly loud in his own ears, drowning out the distant calls and quiet chatter of his teammates as they finish securing the perimeter. 
Bucky sways on his feet, battered, bruised, and spent, allowing himself a moment to lean on the strength of his friends. Suddenly, he lies sprawled in the snow, feeling the cool embrace of the earth beneath him. The edges of Bucky’s vision frays, pulling at the seams of consciousness. 
Steve is at his side in an instant, eyes etched with concern as he implores, “Stay with us, bud.” 
It’s then, among the invading shadows, that a piercing cry shatters the air—a siren’s call that claws its way through the haze. 
“Bucky!” It’s you, your voice laced with terror and something that sounds a lot like love, a symphony that plays upon the most vulnerable strings of his battered heart. In that moment, before the void can swallow him whole, Bucky finds the strength in the resonance of your call. 
He fights against the pull of darkness, wanting nothing more than to get up, to reassure you with a soft touch, a gentle word, anything. But his limbs betray him, heavy as lead and twice as cold. 
“Bucky, I’m here!” He hears you again, his body jostled as you slide into the snow next to him. He feels your hands on his face, your tears splashing onto his cheeks. 
And then, surrendering to the exhaustion, Bucky allows the darkness to envelop him, the echo of your voice a lullaby that carries him toward the uncertain embrace of sleep. 
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The sleek doors to the compound hiss open, revealing an expanse of a room that could swallow modest homes whole. There’s a hum in the air, the kind that smells like money and buzzes with gadgets that probably haven’t even hit the market yet. Floor-to-ceiling glass walls offer a greedy view of the Manhattan skyline in the distance, but none of that holds her attention. 
Natasha Romanoff stands there, the sterile scent of antiseptic wafting through the dimly lit medical wing. She glides between the beds until she reaches your bedside, a tangle of wires and monitors attached to your unconscious figure. You stir, lashes fluttering as if you can feel her next to you. 
“Bucky?” You ask, your first thought not for yourself but for him. 
“He’s in the other room,” Natasha replies, her tone even, betraying none of the concern within her emerald eyes. “They’re patching him up. Super soldier serum works wonders.” 
“And Alpine?” 
“I’m assuming that’s the cat,” Natasha cracks a tiny smile, “Tony’s keeping her company. I think he’s taken a liking to her.” 
The redhead sits on the edge of your bed, her posture impeccable, and yet somehow still conveying the weariness in her shoulders. A thick and heavy silence suddenly falls between you, and you can’t help but tense under her scrutiny.
“Natasha, I—” you begin, but she holds up a hand, interrupting the apologies you’re ready to spill forth. 
“Going rogue on that mission,” she starts, her voice soft but firm, “because you did technically go rogue, kroshka, was more than reckless. Your behaviour’s becoming a pattern; I thought it’d be better to give you some space, some time to work through everything that’s happened, but it’s just getting worse.” 
There’s a maternal edge to her admonishment, tempered by an understanding of someone who had once danced on the knife’s edge of danger herself. It’s why your gaze falls away, the heat of shame crawling up your neck. 
You know you’ve made a mistake, that your impulsive decision had almost cost you everything. “I know,” you murmur, your voice barely above a whisper, “and I put Bucky at risk too.” 
The confession is a small surrender, the first verbal acknowledgement of the fragility that lays beneath your normally hardened exterior. Natasha reaches out, her hand resting lightly on yours, a silent reassurance on top of the regret. 
“Almost didn’t make it out this time,” Natasha continues. The subtext is clear: she could ill afford to lose you, not to death, nor to the darkness that seems to claw at your soul. 
“It won’t happen again,” you promise, looking her straight in the eye. She holds your gaze for a few seconds, and even though she has every right to, there’s not a single trace of doubt in her eyes. 
“Good,” she says, squeezing your hand, her lips curving up into the smallest of smiles. It’s only then that you notice she’s holding a tablet in her other hand, cradled carefully in her lap. Her eyes follow your gaze and she inhales sharply, the air in the room shifting as her sisterly demeanour is replaced by that of an agent’s. 
“What is it?” You ask, watching as her fingers dance across the screen. She angles it toward you, casting a pale glow against the sheets. 
“We found this at the Hydra base,” Natasha says, turning her eyes away from the screen and back onto you. You watch, breath hitching as the grainy footage sputters to life. The video shows a hauntingly familiar corridor, and there he is—the Winter Soldier, a phantom from the past, his metal arm gleaming as he dispatches guard after guard with ruthless efficiency. 
“Natasha, I can’t…” your voice trails off, strangled by the lump forming in your throat. The images of your own gaunt figure lying limp in Natasha’s arms comes into view, all the while the Soldier moved with a singular purpose, stepping into harm’s path so you can make your escape. “Nat, you couldn’t have known. We… we barely made it out of there as it was.” 
“Should’ve known,” she retorts, more to herself than you. Her words are steeped in self-reproach; for the Black Widow to overlook the details was not something that occurred often. “He was there, fighting for us—for you—and I didn’t even sense it.” 
“I guess even the best of us have our blind spots.” You try to joke, but it lands totally flat. 
“I guess so,” she agrees, never taking her eyes off you, the underlying meaning of her words suddenly making you emotional. 
“Were you ever going to tell me he was there?” She asks, but her voice holds no malice. In fact, you see regret in her eyes too, another reason for all those years of secrecy. Your heart clenches at the idea of stirring up ghosts that haunt Bucky, but it cracks under the thought that it might do the same for Natasha. 
You shake your head, admitting you would have taken it to your grave if you could. Your sister looks crushed, one of her hands coming to rest against the side of your head. 
“Why do you always suffer alone, little sister?” 
“Because some secrets are worth enduring for.” 
She doesn’t argue with you there. “You have to tell him, at least.” 
You scoff, turning away and pulling your blanket over your head. She’s having none of it, yanking it off you with surprising force. “Hey, I’m injured here!” 
“He needs to know, kroshka,” Natasha insists, her earnest gaze piercing through your defences. “He needs to know that not all of his past is soaked in blood. That even in the darkest of times, he did something good, something noble.” 
Your chest grows heavy with sadness, the walls of the infirmary seeming to close in as the truth looms large over the both of you. 
“How can I?” Your voice trembles, your eyes glazing over with tears. “After everything he’s been through, how can I dredge up those memories? They’re just echoes, Natasha. Echoes of a person he doesn’t even remember being.” 
“Because,” she replies, her voice softening. “He needs to hear the truth, and he deserves to hear it from you.” 
Right on cue, the door to the infirmary slides open with a hushed whirr,  and your conversation falls into a startled hush. Bucky stands at the threshold, his posture the embodiment of recovered strength, the super soldier serum having mended his flesh and bones with uncanny speed. 
His eyes, however, bear the weight of experiences that no serum could erase. Still, he tries to smile for you. “Hey there.” 
Your heart stutters at the sight of him, every wound on your body protesting as you attempt to sit up. Natasha places a gentle hand on your shoulder, easing you back onto the pillows. 
“Take it easy,” Natasha advises, a knowing smile gracing her lips. “He’s not going anywhere.” 
“Romanoff,” Bucky nods in acknowledgement, his glance briefly meeting hers before settling on you with an intensity that seems to anchor you both to the spot. 
“I’ll give you two a moment,” Natasha says, her voice a mere thread of sound in the charged atmosphere of the room. Her steps are silent as she crosses the space between you, and before she exits, she pauses at the door, her hand lingering on the frame. 
She turns to share a final look with you, a silent exchange fraught with meaning. You know what it means even without saying anything; it’s a look that implores you to embrace the vulnerability of truth, and a look that promises, no matter what the outcome, that she would never leave you to face the storm alone. 
With one last nod, she steps out into the hallway, leaving you and Bucky enveloped in the aftermath of her departure. You watch as Bucky approaches carefully, his broad shoulders squared, his footsteps measured. 
“Hey,” he says again, “how are you feeling?” 
“Fine,” you reply as he sits down in a chair next to your bed. He reaches out and gently brushes a stray lock of hair from your face. “A little morphine makes everything a lot better.” 
Bucky grins, but it falters after a second or two. “About what happened back at the cabin…” 
I love you. 
Sometimes, I get the strangest feeling that I have for a really long time. 
You look away, the vulnerability in his voice making your stomach lurch. It’s only been a few hours, and yet it feels like a lifetime ago. 
“I don’t want you to feel pressured to… to say anything. Nothing has to change,” he says, his gaze steadfast and tender. “But I want you to know I meant it. Every word.” 
You remember how he was like the last time he was in New York, his always solitary figure against the chaos of the city, a man out of time seeking a place in a world that had moved on without him. 
He’s stronger than you will ever be, but in that moment, emboldened by his admission, you reach for the tablet Natasha left behind. You activate the screen, before hesitating for another moment. 
“What’s wrong?” Bucky asks, sitting a little straighter in his chair. 
Maybe nothing, maybe everything, you think, your throat tight as you hand the tablet to him. His eyes widen as the images play out before him—the Winter Soldier, relentless and lethal, cutting down Hydra agents with a precision that chills blood. 
But there, in the carnage, is a sliver of humanity. He, usually the harbinger of death, had in a single moment turned saviour for two women ensnared by the same darkness that had once claimed him. 
“But that’s…” Bucky starts, wanting to say that’s impossible. “I… I don’t remember this.” 
“That’s you,” you say softly, your fingers tracing the outline of his face on the screen. “You saved us. You saved me.” 
His hand shakes as he sets the device down, the wind knocked from his lungs as realization dawned. “How can I not remember?” 
“Because they didn’t want you to,” you tell him, your own heart aching with the burden of his forgotten moment of heroism. “But it’s true. That was all you… the part of you that Hydra could never touch. Even then.” 
For a moment, silence stretches between you, filled with the ghosts of a shared history. But then the dam bursts, tears betraying your formerly stoic facades, tracing paths down your weathered cheeks. 
“Forgive me,” he pleads, taking your hand and pressing your fingertips to his lips, because while he had forgotten, you had remembered every agonizing second. “I should have known sooner. I should have remembered you.” 
“Don’t do that to yourself,” you tell him, but you can see the self-reproach clinging to him like a second skin. “I’m the one who should be ashamed. You’re always there, always pulling me back from the brink. And I—” 
Your voice breaks, the weight of a confession years in the making pressing down upon your chest. 
“I don’t deserve how you see me. You think I’m strong, capable, but I’m not. I’m just… broken.” The word falls from your lips like the final verdict of a long fought battle, more tears escaping your eyes and dripping onto your pillow. 
“What? No—” 
“I’m always the one needing saving,” you interject, a hint of desperation lacing your words. “You, Natasha, and even Steve. You’ve all saved me and I can’t ever do a damn thing for you.” 
“You done more than enough.” Bucky’s brow creases with concern, his expression crumbling, his hand reaching out before resting on top of yours. 
“How can you love someone like me? I’m nothing. I’m nobody. I don’t even have a name.” All the years of buried feelings, what was crammed into a tiny little box and shoved into the furthest corners of your mind, come rushing forth. “I’m the one who doesn’t deserve you.” 
Bucky looks into your eyes, watching as the last light from the setting sun is replaced with the twinkle of the night stars, the both of you searching for absolution in the other. 
“You’re wrong,” he whispers, hearing your deepest fears and wishing he could take the all away. “You see weakness, I see strength. You see shame, but I see bravery. You think you’re broken, but to me, you are… everything.” 
Damn it all. He’s smiling at you, really smiling, as if with each word the burden lifts from the depths of his soul. And while your rattled brain is constantly telling you that you aren’t worthy, that he deserves more than the mere remnants of a broken woman, your heart screams something else. 
It calls for him. It tells you to stay. Because if you can’t trust the world to make him happy, then you would have to do it yourself. And wouldn’t that be the best thing? To know that you, of all people, a nobody from nowhere, could make him happy? 
“I love you too,” you whisper, your hands stroking his face, your eyes shining as he presses his forehead to yours. “If you’ll still have me.” 
He clutches onto you like you’re the only source of the air that he breathes, like he can’t bear to let you go. 
“Ah, darlin’,” he says, leaning forward to press the achingly lovely curve of his lips to yours, his whispers muffled against your scared watery smile. “It’s you. It’s always been you.” 
And then he’s in your arms. You kiss him once, twice, and then a third time, and you know then that this is the beginning—or rather, the continuation—of something amazing. 
As he whispers love onto your skin, he etches onto your heart that love isn’t about deserving. 
It’s about choosing, again and again. 
And no matter how many times you fall apart or have to put yourself back together, you will always choose Bucky Barnes. 
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. ONE YEAR LATER
You are stunning. 
It’s the only thought Bucky has as he lies back against the pillows, your hands on top of his as he grips your quaking thighs. The cabin, now restored to its former glory and moved to a new secret location, is warm—he’s made sure of it, spent a good ten minutes stoking the fire in its stone hearth just a few feet away, but he watches in awe as his touch raises goosebumps all over your skin. 
Your eyes are wild beneath your hair as you straddle his hips, drawing a shuddering breath from your sweet and always gentle lover. You slide up and down the length of him, your most intimate places pressed together, his grip on your thighs tightening just a touch. 
He’s doing okay until you take him in, slowly, and then rotate your hips, head thrown back and your back arched in pleasure. Bucky gasps, sitting up in a flash and holding you tight. 
“Too much?” You ask in a breathless whisper, your breath quickening as his hands stroke the base of your spine. 
“Too fast,” he chuckles, his words muffled against the delicate curve of your shoulder. He kisses you there sweetly before pulling back enough to look into your face. He wants to make this last, even if it kills him. 
“Then we don’t have to—” You start to say, but then he’s lifting you up… and then back down… so slowly, so deliciously glorious, you can feel your toes start to curl. Your hands grip his strong shoulders, moving with him at the pace he’s set, chest to chest. 
“Do you want to stop?” He asks, mischief and mirth laced in his voice. You reach up to thread your fingers into his hair and pull, just hard enough to make him hiss, before looking down at him with a smile. 
“If you stop, I’ll actually pummel you,” you laugh, the sound unfamiliar even to you, but a sweet warmth spreads through your veins. You didn’t know you could laugh again, after all that, but Bucky just has this way of tearing down your walls, of making you feel things you didn’t think you’d ever feel again. 
“Whatever my darlin’ wants, my darlin’ gets,” Bucky grins as he tilts you back, following you down onto his linen sheets. He settles on top of you, pressing your knees to the bed. Only when you’re whimpering and clawing at his back does he thrust himself all the way inside, right up to the hilt. 
With a cry of his name, you grab at his hips to draw him in, so deep you swear you can feel him right against your beating heart. Bucky buries his face in the crook of your neck, his moist breath gliding over the column of your throat as he speeds up his movements, but still carefully controlled, not stopping even as he feels you begin to spend. 
It’s not until your arms squeeze him tighter, until a sweet scream falls from your lips, your muscles undulating like rolling ocean waves around him, that he finally lets himself go. 
When he can finally feel his limbs again, he pulls back and you’re smiling at him. Tears, despite himself, well up as he presses a kiss to your lips. The sight is becoming more frequent, and each time you grace him with it, he has to admit it still makes him a little breathless.
Outside the cabin, his sanctuary that he now eagerly shares with you, the snow continues to fall silently towards the earth. You drift off to sleep next to him, your hand on his chest, right over his heart. He watches you for a few seconds, his own eyelids growing heavy. He blinks slowly, wanting to savour this moment. 
He vows to make you breakfast in the morning, to make a batch of fresh rolls just as you are being pulled from the lulls of sleep, with Alpine watching almost protectively from her usual spot. 
He promises to call Steve after, to let him know that you’re both settling in nicely in your new home, and that Natasha can stop sending him about a dozen daily text messages requesting status updates. 
He swears that he will one day have the courage to take out the velvet box tucked away in one of the drawers somewhere, and ask you for a yes or no answer. But tonight, he’s content to drift off to sleep beside you—warm, loved, and happy. 
When Bucky opens his eyes the next morning, you are still there, and he remembers this time. He doesn’t just know; he remembers. 
And the sky is new.
Fin.
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Taglist — @cjand10 @pbs-theundeadmaggot @nerdreader @crist1216
Notes — I said I was gonna wait until Friday to post, but eff that lol. I couldn’t wait to share this finale.
So, this story turned into something totally different than what was originally conceived. I don’t know why or how. It was always intended to only have five chapters though, and I supposed I technically could have stretched it out into six parts, but I ultimately decided not to. I’m sorry if this isn’t what you were expecting or hoping for, but I am actually pretty okay with how it turned out in the end.
Thank you to everyone who supported my first fic! 🥹 I hope you enjoyed the angst and the brief fluff at the end! And now I can work on bringing you my rom-com Steve story, You’re Stuck With Me. Stay tuned!! 💖💖💖
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angrythingstarlight · 2 months
Note
"Which is toddler for my hands are cold and I'm about to make it your problem"
How Does Bucky help us take care of this transferred problem?
Bucky knows exactly how to warm you up.
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Pairing: Mafia!Bucky x Reader
WC: Drabble
A/N: Unbetad, written on my phone.
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You have this sixth sense when it comes to Bucky. It's like your body has been finely tuned to react to him whenever he's in your vicinity. It's why you don't turn around when you hear snow crunching behind you. You know it's him.
The masculine scent of his cologne, deep amberwood, and vanilla, surrounds you. His hand curves around your hip while his arm moves around your belly and he pulls you into his chest.
Bucky runs hot and not even the brisk, fresh breeze coming off the snowcapped mountains can cool him down.
Not that you mind. You lean into him, sighing softly at the feel of his warm, soft lips chaining passionate, languid kisses up the side of your cool throat.
"My poor Malyshka," he murmurs, his baritone rolls across your skin. "Let me warm you up."
His hand eases across your hip and up your jacket and cashmere sweater. His large palm splays across your soft belly, the heat from his body melts into you. "Better?"
Yes.
No.
He feels good, wrapped around you like this. You barely notice the cold wind whipping around the two of you.
But that's the problem.
He feels too good. His touch is addictive and you crave more of it. It's not enough.
Bucky patiently waits for your answer, his lips moving to the other side of your throat, kiss after slow, heady kiss lining your skin, you instinctively tilt your head to give him more access.
"Yes. That's nice," you breathe out, eyes fluttering shut. He makes it so easy to let go and let him take over.
He finds that sensitive area beneath your ear and gently nips and sucks, sending a heady shiver down your spine. He feels it, the calloused pads of his fingertips dig into your belly and he manages to pull you even closer to his large body. "I can't wait to get you alone so I can properly warm you up Malyshka."
He's planning on taking his time with you. He's going to kiss every inch of your body. Bucky's going make sure you're nice and ready for him.
When you are, when you feel you can't stand it another minute long, when you're aching for him so bad that desire and lust and pure need is blazing through your veins, then he's going to give you everything you want. Again and again and again.
And he won't stop until you swear you're going to shatter. You might not be able to walk tomorrow but it's going to be worth it.
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noceurous · 28 days
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get you back
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summary: You hated that you loved Bucky Barnes, and he loved that you could not hate him.
warnings: mention of alcohol consumption, semi-drunkenness, carsex (18+), fingering, oral, swearing, smut, p in v, unprotected sex (don’t do it), fuckbuddy!bucky, dbf!bucky, implied age gap, mention of bad boyfriends (not bucky), using nicknames (princess, bunny) , slight degradation - nothing physical, some mention of food
minors dni
a/n: yes I AM BACK
A loud snap of fingers made you turn your head to him. “Are you even listening to me?” You sighed, pressing fingers on your temples to look like you were trying to remember.
No, you weren’t listening. You were thinking how that hot guy was about to give you his number, before James Buchanan Barnes a.k.a the actual devil, snatched you away. Leading you to his car without giving you a chance to say goodbye to the best body you have ever seen.
You. Hated. James. Bucky. Barnes.
“Something about… bunnies?” You shrugged as you turned your head back towards the road. Even though it was almost pitch black, you fought your urge to look at his profile under car’s lights. Even though he was angry and sleepless he looked better than all the guys you’ve ever known.
“Really? You are not even trying kid.” He said as he emphasized on the last word. He knew how much you hated the nickname.
“Stop calling me a kid. I’m not that young.”
“I will stop calling you a kid, when you stop acting like one. What were you thinking? What was the point of all that drinking? Get my attention or liver failure?”
The point was to get over your ex boyfriend finding someone before you did. You didn’t want to be the one who was stuck in an ended relationship.
You weren’t even prepared to the idea that he would start dating in a few months. His post just popped on your phone while you were scrolling through pictures on Instagram. Selfie with her, cheek to cheek and smiling like a true dumbass he is.
Getting ass drunk would be a nice way to forget. But you shouldn’t been too drunk to start texting and calling other people.
Especially calling the guy you hated the most. Because he would show up just in time, and yank you away from the guy you were flirting with.
You really shouldn’t have drunk texted your on-again-off-again hookup. Neighbour of your parents, a close friend of your dad.
It started just a few days after your heartbreak. You weren’t sure of how it started, but you remembered how it ended. In his bed, literally begging him for letting you cum as he pounded into you like an animal.
When you weren’t fucking, all you did was argue. Arguments about when to meet up or where to meet up… You hated meeting up in his place, so close to your parents. And he hated meeting only for an hour max.
You started fighting and decided to not meet up again. Either of you got tired of all the lies and secrets. It was you more than it was him. Bucky was always sure you would come back to him one way or another.
“Remind me not to call you again.” You huffed, resting your head on the window. Sun was about to shine in a few hours and all you wanted was to get into your bed. All you needed was forget the day and move on.
“Sure your parents would be thrilled to know their daughter would end up in jail for DUI.” You turned your neck so fast that it hurt.
“I wasn’t going to drive the car!”
“You getting into car of a drunk idiot is stupid enough too!”
“Stop acting like you are my dad! He was fucking hot, and he told me his place was really close.”
“What made you believe in him? I know what that kind of guy thinks. It is only getting you to the bed. You would be considered lucky if he bothered to call you the next day.”
“So? What made you think I am not okay with it?” You saw all the blood rushing to his cheeks, decorating them with a soft pink hue.
“Okay...” He said trying to not go any further with that discussion.
You dropped your shoulders, when you saw how his grasp on wheel tightened and his jaw clenched. If you didn’t know him that well, you would say he was offended.
Whether it was because of anger towards him or how tired you were. You didn’t say anything back but leant your seat back to at least sleep for the rest of the ride.
“Oh no princess, you are definitely not sleeping.” He said just before he slapped your thigh. Small ‘Hey!’ fell from your lips. It was fair to expect him to snap and say you crossed a line.
You yanked your leg away from his grasp. He shut you up before you could say anything back. “You made me get all this way three in the morning. Ofcourse there would be consequences.”
“I didn’t ask you to come.” You said as you rubbed your thigh.
“You sent me a picture of you lifting your skirt and texted all those things you want to do with me. But when I come to pick you up, I saw you on the lap of some dickhead.”
“I was horny. We’ve decided to stop with fooling around. Life moves on James.” As you finished the sentence, his foot stepped on the pedal so quick that he had to use his arm to stop you from falling forward.
“Get in the back of the car.”
“James, I’m tired.”
“Get in the back, or I will make you bunny.” You didn’t said anything back. Bucky never called you bunny, if he didn’t have something on his mind. You knew better than to take the risk of getting him angrier.
You rolled your eyes before unfastening your seatbelt. He caught the sight of your underwear as you bent over to move through the gap between the seats. Even though Bucky saw your pink thong, you acted like you had the upper hand.
“Take off your skirt.” He said before coming next to you. He almost yanked off the door before squishing you on the backseat.
He pulled you by your legs, making you lie down. The cold leather of the seats caused goosebumps on your skin. That and you knew what he was capable of when he was angry.
And he was pissed.
“Not so tired ha, bunny?” His large hands wandered along your legs, moving slowly towards your hips.
A loud noise of your gulp echoed in your brain. You could get used to that view. You legs hooked to his shoulders. His charming face inches over your lucky thong.
“Tell me again bunny.” He said as his eyes locked on your figure under his, trying not to smirk at the wet patch on your thong.
“Tell you what?” You asked. Blinking at him with nothing else on your mind.
“Tell me again the last thing you told me before breaking up with me. So I would not have my way with you.”
“Uhm...” He started kissing on the top of your thighs. Index finger was tracing your slit over the thong.
“We can’t keep doing this and not expect one of us getting hurt. Ah-“ He bit inside of your thigh, sucking a gentle bruise. “James.”
He didn’t listen to you. If he ever did that was not it definitely.
“I’m listening. Continue.” Kisses, soft bites started decorating your body.
His hands placed next to your waist. His teeth brushed along the band of your thong. You wanted to raise your hips. But the way he looked up at you, the darkness in his eyes, made you stop.
You licked your lips, closing your eyes to concentrate. “We continue lying to our close ones and soon enough the lies would get out of—“ You stopped as he curled his finger like a hook to pull down your thong.
He mumbled something that you were sure was Russian as he got close to your heat. His eyes looked into your eyes. You knew he was daring you to stop.
If you stop I’ll stop too bunny.
He didn’t need to speak for you to understand.
“—hands. Lies get out of our hands. It is too risky and it does not worth it. We both know that this affair does not take LONG!”
He licked a stripe over your slit. As his cold fingers separated your folds. He loved to torture you like this.
“I don’t want any of us to get hurt.” You manage to finish your speech as you felt the familiar tingles build up.
The tip of his tongue flicked your clit and you had to hold on to something, his hair, to stop your thighs to close around his head.
“See this is where you are wrong, bunny. There isn’t any chance where you can hurt me...” He said as his fingers collected some of your juices, raising them to his lips. “Unless you try to neglect me of your sweet nectar.” He sucked his fingers clean, you heard a tiny ‘hmm’ as his fingers touched his tongue.
He raised his head to look at you when he was circling around your weeping hole. “Answer this, do you want to hurt me bunny?” He wanted to make you weep as much as your pussy.
“N-no. I don’t want to hurt you.”
“Then why you try to break things off?” The tip of his finger slowly pushed into your whole. He pulled it back before you could enjoy this. “Are you going to try and break things off again?” Another question he didn’t need to hear its answer to. He could read it from your tearful eyes and slight pout. “Oh bunny.” He whispered to himself, pride filling his chest.
His finger went back to circling around your hole as he used another one to toy with your clit. You could not stop yourself from curling your toes and try to pull him closer.
That arrogonat smirk on his face made a comeback. “Are you going to flirt with other guys who I’m sure does not even know what a clit is?” You shook head your again and he pressed his thumb.
“Fuck.” You said as you squirmed under his touch.
“Not the answer I am looking for. Do you want to try again bunny?”
“I—I’m not going to flirt with other guy a—and ohgod!” He pushed one inch of his finger inside curling the tip so it would reach your spot. You didn’t stop so he wouldn’t either. “I’m not going break things o—off.”
One more inch and you knew you would start to drip onto seats. Before you knew it, his mouth got back onto your clit. “James!” You said again as you pulled onto his locks.
“Shit! It’s only been a week but your pussy is crying out f’ me.” He said as he stood back up.
Your legs started shaking by the time. You whimpered at the lost contact of his fingers and lips. You also missed seeing him with your thighs wrapped around his head.
You knew if you touched yourself he would bite your fingers and deny you any sort of release. He quickly unfastened his belt and lowered his pants and boxers just low enough to take out his cock.
The tip was swollen red it was starting to leak some precum as he pressed it on your clit. “You are an attention whore bunny. It’s been only a week and I find you cosy with another guy. This deserves punishment don’t you think?”
“Please! I’ve been just trying to get your attention.” He smiled at your confession as he aligned his tip.
“Tell me you are mine and mine only. If you tell me that, I’ll give you what you want.”
“I’m yours James. I’m only yours, I do not belong to anybody else.” He started slowly push into you.
He leaned over you to fix the hair got on your face. His lips brushed along yours when you moaned as he found the spot. Your legs started to got down but he held them back. Pushing your bent knee to your chest as he started moving.
His hips started rutting into you slowly. “So pretty like this bunny. All spread out for me.” His tongue darted out from his lips to giving you a longing kiss. All teeth and tongue, full of lust and desire.
His large hands pulled down your strapless top, letting your tits out. His tongue clicked on top of mouth. “And thinking I would be sharing them with some dickhead.” He pushed into you hardly, making you jump into his arms.
“I don’t share bunny. Never.” You knew he meant more with those words.
Air inside the car was getting thick because of your panting. His fingers started playing with your nipples to get them erect as he held your tits together and started licking and sucking both of them.
“Not the teeth ah!” You tried to protest but he had already sunk his teeth into your extra-sensitive flesh. Sweet melody of your cries caused him to increase speed. He wanted more.
You yelped as you tried to find something to hold onto, best thing you found was the back of his shoulder as you pressed your nails against his skin. Bruises and scratches would be greeting both of you as first thing in the morning but it didn’t bother you as long as it came with pleasure.
“FuckFuckFuck!” Familiar coil started to form under your belly button, and you threw your head back. “James, please please…”
“Wanna cum bunny? Is that it? Mumblin’ because you are too close?” He said after detaching from your nipples with a pop. The little numb was all swollen and covered in saliva.
“Y-yes oh.” He slammed his hips onto yours with more force and stayed pressed into you. “Cum for me bunny. Cream all over my cock, fuck, you filthy girl, so eager for a release.” He said as he stopped your wriggling hips against is. “Humpin’ me like a cute lil’ bunny.”
Your hips started moving involuntarily, chasing after your release. He helped you with continuing the pound into you. You were chanting his name unable to form more coherent words or sentences.
“That’s it bunny. Cum for me come on! I’ve got you.” Just after he was finished your release hit you like a wave, causing you to lose all the control of your mind and body.
But he didn’t stop, he increased his pace. Chasing his own release using your numb body. “‘So pretty like this bunny. Makes me want to keep you all to myself.”
“I’m all yours.” You whispered, truly meant it. As you became used to the swell on your chest each time you look at him.
You were really his.
“Yeah? Are you going to take my cum? Let me breed you? I’m sure you would love that don’t you bunny? All swollen with my cum, looking at me with those pretty eyes. Fuck!”
“Yes, yes yes give it to me please.”
“Fucking take it. You little cumslut.” You felt the wetness and warmth of his release shoot right inside of you.
He stood there with your legs wrapped around his waist. Looking at your tired and ruined figure. Taking the sight in just before he slowly pulled out.
“We—“ You tried to speak up, trying not to show him how much you missed his cock inside you already.
As he was putting his clothes back on you once were aware of this situation.
There was no We, you two were just fucking whenever one of you needed some release. No matter what you do to get his attention, all you would get was his dick pounding into you. It won’t be his heart.
Sound of glove compartment’s being closed made you raise on your elbows to look at him.
You saw him take out some tissues to wipe off his leaking cum. “Are you on the pill?” You shook your head, you knew how those were messing up with you. “I’m not ovulating, it’s fine.” He shook his head, “Still gotta get you some plan B. We shouldn’t be risking it.”
“Sure.” You tried to swallow the ache in your throat, and your pride.
You fixed your top and found your thong on the ground, raising it to put it on. Tension between the two of you was so thick that a saw could not even cut it.
He got back on his seat and started the engine. “The sun is about to rise, I can drive to a diner and got us some breakfast. There is a place I know makes your favourite. They are also good at making it.” He couldn’t hide his smile when he saw your smile at the mention of the food. He loved making you smile like that.
Sleep was the last thing on your mind, since he fucked your brains out. Since it had been more than 10 hours since you last ate something; growling sounds from your stomach was about to come. “Sounds good but I want to wear my skirt first.”
“Sure bunny.” He said as he tossed your skirt back to you.
And it was a second, just a second, that he felt like he could get used to it.
He could get used to having breakfast with you. He could get used to your face being the first thing he saw as he started his day. He could get used to having sex with only one person, someone really means something to him.
But when your phone buzzed, and he saw your dad’s name on the screen he got back into reality.
You sent it to voicemail, and leaned closer to him over the table. He saw the same smile again on your lips and the familiar spark on your eyes.
“So what do you say? Your place or mine?”
He smiled back at you, leaning over you. “Which one do you prefer, bunny?” He knew he could go on as long as you looked at him like that.
As long as you looked at him with love. Even if you were just realizing, he was already an addict for it.
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cattordi · 10 months
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a/n did y’all miss me??? writing this in class 🤗 so enjoy. honestly felt like i write absolutely too much abt absolutely nothing
summary you get a flat tire on the way to a party and on top of that you’re in the middle of nowhere so you call bucky to help you
pairings brothersbestfriend!mechanic!bucky barnes x collegestudent!reader
warnings smut , breeding, praise, not proofread, choking, foul language, arguing?,a bit of fluff etc. 18+ MINORS DNI
don’t test me
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“only this would happen to me” you groan before pulling your car over in the absolute middle of nowhere.
you were on the way to a spring break party but clearly the universe had other plans. getting out of your car, you walk around to check out the damage.
low and behold, a flat tire.
“no fucking way.” you whisper. you were miles away from a gas station or any sort of place other people were. grabbing your phone from your back pocket of your jean shorts, you scroll through your contacts finding your brothers name.
you place the phone to your ear and sit for a bit letting it ring.
and ring.
and ring. until finally you’re sent to voicemail.
what the fuck?
you hesitate as you keep scrolling through your contacts looking at other options of help; until you finally reach that one person.
bucky.
your least favorite human to ever walk the earth but you could never deny how he made you feel sometimes.
the man was good with his words, you have to admit it.
only problem was, he was your brothers best friend and also a dick.
pressing the call button, you wait as the phone rings.
“please pick up, plea-“
“hey y/n, what’s up?” he says and there’s shuffling in the background.
“hey, i’m sorry to bother.”
no you aren’t.
“i got a flat tire and i need help changing it. if you can’t that’s fi-“
“where are you?”
“in the middle of nowhere.”
“what the hell? get in your car and send me your location. i’ll be there in 15.”
knowing you’re at least 30 minutes out of town, you comply and wait.
after what feels like 20 years, bright head lights blind you from behind and you sit up in your car. your drivers side door flies open and a pissed bucky stares at you.
“you could’ve at least locked the door y/n. hell you could’ve gotten murdered.”
rolling your eyes you get out, “didn’t think anyone would even be out here at this time of night.”
“don’t start with your attitude.” he begins while pulling a car jack out his truck, “i’m not in the mood.”
“whatever.”
“why are you even out here this late?”
“what are you my dad?”
“no but i’m your brothers best friend and i have the right to know.”
“it’s none of your busines.” you say and glare at him.
“tell me.”
“no.”
“y/n..” he basically growls at you.
“no.”
“i swear if you don’t tell me.”
you can see the frustration in his face so to be a brat, you keep going.
“i was going to get fucked.” you say and try not to laugh.
visible jealousy crosses his face and he stands from his squatted position. “you what?”
“i was going to have sex? is that a prob-“ you begin but are cut off by a hand around your throat.
“you know that pisses me off, so why keep pushing it? hm?” he hums the last part, “you tryna get to me darling?”
you do the best you can to nod as pleasure filled tears brim your eyes.
this is what you always wanted from him.
his metal hand slims into your shorts finding your clit. “do you want me to take you in my truck?”
you nod and his eyes go dark, taking a bit of the pressure off your throat.
if anyone passed by, you’re sure the police would be called.
“use your words.”
“yes.”
“good job baby.”
you both walk to his truck, him following behind you.
he opens the door to the back for you and you hop in immediately filled with even more excitement.
as soon as he closes the door behind the two of you, his lips attack yours. though you’re in such a small space it feels just right for the two of you.
pulling at your shorts, bucky unbuttons them and pulls them down with your underwear.
he takes notices of the wet spot on your panties and chuckles. “so wet for me already.”
his hand slids between your folds; coating every inch of you before two fingers slide in.
you gasp at the stretch and his pace only gets faster. “you feel so tight around my fingers baby.”
“i’m gonna cum.”
he stops and you’re immediately pissed off. “why’d you stop?”
“i want you to cum when i’m you.”
you hadn’t notice his jeans were down but his dick caught your full attention,
and my lord was it big.
“it’s not gonna fit.”
“oh it will. lay back for me.” he says calmly all the while, lining up at your entrance.
the anticipation wears off as soon as he slams in you and begins moving. the truck fills with sounds of moans and skin slapping.
“you’re so tight, i love it.” he says and his strokes become faster.
“you’re so big.” you say in between moans. “i’m getting so close.”
“you’re doing so well,” he begins and leans down to kiss you, “you take me so well.”
you’re getting closer and closer to coming everytine he hits your sweet spot and it couldn’t feel any better. “harder please.” you moan and he complies immediately, thrusting into you.
“i’m gonna cum.” you say and at that moment his thumb finds your clit and rubs big meaningful circles.
“my lord darling, you feel so good around me. it’s taking everything in me not to cum right now.”
he continues to thrust into you getting you closer and closer to what you both desire. “i’m cumming bucky.”
“i feel you darling, keep going. you’re squeezin’ me so tight.” he begins and you continue to cum around his cock,”i’ve waited for this for long baby.”
yours moans get louder as when grabs your legs and puts him on his shoulder, making his thrust hit a different spot inside of you. “y/n..” he moans, “fuck you’re making me fun babydoll.”
with that, his continues his fast thrust hitting your g-spot repeatedly till he comes.
warm spurts of cum fill you as his thrust slow down and eventually come to a halt. “holy fuck that was the best sex i’ve had in a long time..” you say while trying to catch your breath.
“you wanna go again?”
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buckrecs · 10 months
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Sex Pollen
masterlist | req masterlist
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Play Pretend by @wkemeup
When Bucky is injected with a substance that leaves him desperate for release, you offer your help.
In The Dust by @metalbuckaroo
at a shack after a mission, Bucky realizes the ‘dust’ that he thought wouldn’t be effective anymore needs to be brought up. You insist partners are suppose to communicate with each other.
addicted to you by @bonky-n-steeb
you find Bucky to be irresistible after you both get affected by sex pollen.
Left Gasping For Air by @bucksfucks
doused with sex pollen, you & bucky are met with a difficult decision.
Take You There by @heli0s-writes
Sam plays a game called Fuck or Die. It's like he willed it into existence as you and Bucky explore the basement of an old Hydra lair.
Chemical Reactions by @slut4buckysarm
bucky barnes joining in on your solo mission was the worst part of the night. that was until the both of you got dosed with sex pollen.
Daisies by @rebeccccccaaa
Bucky gets hit with that god awful (but really hot) sex pollen.
burning desire by @lanadelreyscokewhor3
after being sprayed with sex pollen on a mission gone wrong, bucky is the only man who can help you. the issue? you hate his guts.
A Piece of His Heart by @thefanbasewhore
Bucky has been struggling with himself for a few months now but never reaches out for help. In order to confront him, you lock him in the lab but only to find out it was on lockdown for a reason and you're now stuck to quarantine with him
only the two of us by @barnesafterglow
stuck together, you and bucky find yourselves in an unfortunate position (or maybe not)
Mean It by @gogolucky13
You and Bucky get trapped overnight in the safe house after a mission. Everything should be okay, except he's your ex and thanks to his carelessness, the situation gets a little more complicated.
Comply by @gogolucky13
With Hydra, everyone is a prisoner.
your hands have made some good mistakes : part 21 by @thenhewaswrongaboutme
The team comes home for a pre-Thanksgiving gathering. Everything is going swimmingly, until Thor breaks out the Asgardian whiskey.
Little Bit of Pollen by @simsadventures
You and Bucky are both Avengers, but that doesn’t mean you have to like each other. What happens when you two are the only one present when you breathe in a sex pollen?
Dosed by @moonstruckbucky
Sex pollen? Sex pollen.
keep your eyes on the road (aka an unexpected sex pollen adventure) by @bitsandbobsandstuff
Honestly, this is what Bucky gets for not listening to you.
for your own good by @witchywithwhiskey
bucky barnes is gifted a strange-looking plant but when you, his closest friend in avengers tower after steve rogers, touches the leaves, it lets out a strange cloud of pollen. both you and bucky soon feel the effects of the plant's pollen and, though bucky's worried about hurting you, you know he never would—and you need his help. desperately.
Petals by @biteofcherry
Bucky and reader is stuck in a cabin in the woods.
Desperate by @buckets-and-trees
Enemies? Rivals? It's always been reluctant teamwork between you and the Winter Soldier, but when put in a situation where personal feelings have to be put aside, maybe actual personal feelings are uncovered.
Thrill me, Fulfill me by @samodivaa
You agreed to help for one mission—now you are both lustful and carnal, affected by sex pollen—you are flint, he is tinder.
Imagine by @buckyalpine
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1800jjbarnes · 3 months
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◇ 𝐃𝐚𝐲 𝟑𝟎: 𝐖𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐰𝐨𝐥𝐟/𝐁𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 - 𝐁𝐮𝐜𝐤𝐲 𝐁𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐞𝐬 ◇
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Let Me Help
【Synopsis】 : You didn't know what it meant to be on heat, let alone know you could have one since you weren't a wolf... but here you were, and Bucky was going to help you through it.
『W.C』 : 1.95k 
-> Genre: Smut. Wolf Au. Fantasy Au. Fluff.
Paring: Werewolf!Bucky x Human!Reader
[Warnings] : Swearing. Unprotective sex. Pet names. Neck kisses, hickies. Biting. Cumming inside [don’t do that unless you wan babas] Alpha kink. Knotting. Slight choking. Rough sex. Fluff stuff. Some Omegaverse stuff
Masterlist | Kinktober list
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You were a human. That fell in love with a werewolf and now you’re his mate and live in a den with all his other wolf friends that are also his pack and you are the first human to be mated to one of the wolves in this pack in history. And plus you are now experiencing what they call a heat but you aren’t a wolf and none of the she-wolves or the alchemist knows what to do so you are pacing back and forth in your bathroom waiting for your lover to come home from a full moon cleanse to tell him to help you through something you’ve never been through before….
Missing anything?
“Fuck!” Your hand slipped off the basin in the bathroom, clutching your stomach. You’ve never experienced such a pain before only being able to compare period pains or when you’ve eaten bad food. But the alchemist, Wanda had warned you since you were human the heat would be way more severe to you than a normal she-wolf. Expressing it might feel like being stabbed or disembowelment. Lovely...
You washed your face with ice-cold water multiple times to try and cool the heat rushing through you but nothing was helping. You felt like you were losing your mind and you had no idea what to do, or how to fix it. All you knew was you needed your mate and needed him now.
Maybe a shower would work? But wait... Why were you now standing under the shower head fully clothed? When did you even turn the shower on let alone get in? Your mind was jumping, hazing. Everything was happening so quickly yet standing still at the same time. You cried, sobbing out for Bucky. Crouching down you let the cold water spray on your hunched back as you hug your knees. The headache was bad and the cramps were worse. Your body was shutting down, making you wonder if this heat could kill you if not looked after.
You couldn’t let your mind slip any further, suddenly hearing the bathroom door being slammed open. A large, beefy Bucky came rushing into the shower. He wasn't wearing a shirt, probably not caring to fully dress when he turned back into his human form. His jeans were getting soaked from the water as he bent down to grab your waist, pulling you up to stand on your feet. You wanted to fall back down but his large frame caged you, holding you tightly so you wouldn't slip. His mouth found your neck sucking on just the right spot. You knew from the little research you had done that it would of most likely been the spot where your glands had been if you were a she-wolf and it was also the spot on your neck that he would mark when you get bounded as soulmates.
He had yet to do so, worried it might affect you if he would knot you. So Instead, when he found the urge to mark you when you both were having sex in the past, he would bite the pillow next to you or the couch arm, or even his own hand. Never would he sink his fang in your sweet soft flesh. His lips kiss along your jugular making you whimper. The small bit of pleasure was sending your mind into a spin. He managed to push you against the wall, tugging at your wet clothing to get it off your shaking body. He would kiss your cheeks, then your forehead, then the corner of your mouth. He would whisper just above the sound of the shower, ‘My pretty pup,’ ‘Let me take care of you,’ ‘That’s it baby, just breath.’
He threw the wet fabric out of the shower making it land on the floor somewhere out of sight. He took this moment, to gaze upon your beautiful body. He could smell you dripping down your leg, making him groan. It was enough to feel the tightness in his jeans get worse. He wanted nothing more than to lose control and knot you like he should. But you were human. Such a fragile thing. Not like a she-wolf that could take his strength. But he had no idea that was exactly what you needed at this moment. “James please, help me. It hurts.”
The cramps were becoming worse when not his touch was soothing some of the aches in your joints. You needed him inside you, desperately. “Please, I need you inside…” Fuck… dirty talk was something you rarely did, finding it too embarrassing to do. Bucky on the other hand was born to be filthy. He loved watching you squirm by the sheer motion of his voice telling you what he wanted to do to you. How he was going to defile you.
“Yeah, pup? You need my cock inside your soaking cunt?” he wanted more from you. Picking one of your legs up so he could stand close to you, rubbing his red angry tip along your slit.
“Yes please, fuck…hmm, I need you so badly. Please James.” Your soft whines got his heart reeling, pushing inside you with little effort as your heat soaked your cunt was perfect for him to slip in. He completely bottomed out in a second making you feel so unbelievably full. The ache in your body was gone for a moment, sweet relief was granted to you. But the cramps were soon coming back making you scream “Fuck me Bucky. Please hurry.”
Who was he to deny his mate, thrusting at a slow steady pace. Your hands gripped his wet biceps as the shower head was directly pouring in between both of you. The stimulation of the running water on your clit, helped your high draw closer. Bucky picked up your other leg, smoothing your body against the wall to fuck you at a harsher angle making your head fall back to hit against the tiles.
Your lover's face buried in your neck, licking and sucking on any flesh he could get to. Everything was perfect but you needed just one more thing which Bucky seemed to know, reaching down to press his thumb on your clit making you gasp clamping down on his cock while you came hard. “Fuck, Fuck, Fuck. Bucky!”
“That’s it pup, come on your mate's cock. Let me feel you come around me.” His voice growled in your ear biting at your ear lobe. He moved backwards slightly letting you wrap your arms around his neck so you could bury your face in his neck this time. You sucked on his rough skin creating your very own mark on his neck. You might not be a wolf but you certainly could still leave your mark.
“I’m coming James please!” You crashed hard, clenching around him. He kept fucking up into you, making your juices squish and squelch around his cock, dripping out onto his legs. But nothing was stopping him. He turn off the shower, needing to fuck you from a different angle.
“Hold onto the sink pup. I’m not done with you yet.” he bent you over the cold sink, making you shiver at the freezing sensation on your sensitive nipples. His cock sunk back into your quivering hole, gifting you a low grumble that ripped through Bucky’s chest. It was almost animalistic, beast-like. His like wolf was taking over. “Fuck sugar, you feel so good. So tight. My perfect pup.”
“Y-hmmm Buck…” Your hips slammed against the counter surely creating indents in your skin that would definitely bruise by the morning. His nails dug into your flesh, making crescent moon shapes while his thrusts got fast as soon approached his edge. Just a little more. Just some more and you had just had perfect timing. “Please Alpha, I need your cum inside me. Please fuck me harder. I want your knot.”
You had no idea where the name came from or why your brain was screaming at you to somehow present for him. To make him know, he could do anything to you. The name slipped off your tongue perfectly and it made his wolf howl. His hips jacked in an inhuman speed, snaking his hand around your throat he growled pooled in your ear. “Alpha hmm? You want your alpha to knot you pup? Mate you? Breed you, fill with his pups?”
Your hand banged against the mirror, smashing a crack into it but not breaking it entirely. Bucky used his hand that was on your hip to cage yours on the said mirror. Linking fingers with you as his thrusts got harder but stuttered through his unstability. “You want my mark sugar? Want to let every other wolf know you’re mine? Fuck just imagining you full and round with my pups makes me want to fuck you all night.”
“Please alpha, Make me yours.” Your cries were music to his ears. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Your his human mate, wanting to be marked, knotted and bred. God, could you get any more perfect.
“It’s okay baby when I’m done, you’ll be leaking my seed for days.” His hand got tighter on your jugular while his lips kissed along your shoulder blades before teasingly nipping at where he would mark you. Everything was so overwhelming, your cramps and all the pain you had felt were washing away being replaced with nothing by Bucky’s scent and touch.
“I’m gonna come, Alpha!” Your choked moans were breathy and short. His hand finally let go of your neck, grasping back on your hip to hold himself up. His fangs grazed your soft skin before he pierced your flesh, letting tears pool on the corners of your tears while he slowed his thrusts to empty his seed deep inside you. you came crashing down soon after. His cock growing, stretching you out, gifting you a new form of pleasure.
“That’s it Pup, deep breath.” He licked your wound, tending to it with extra care while his hand on your hip rubbed circles on your bruising skin. He lifted your left leg up, tilting it towards his body as he sat up straight, turning you around until you could wrap your legs around his waist and arms around his neck. Now facing him, he brushed your hair out of your face, littering you with kisses. You hummed, feeling slumber taking hold of you. “Come on pup. Let’s get you in bed.”
Walking with his cock still inside you was more than uncomfortable and he should have definitely not knot you on the bathroom room counter next time. But as he plopped you on the with him next to you, he helped you cuddle up to him, wrapping you in his scent. “Do you really want my pups…”
“Hmg Fuck sugar…” Bucky had to groan at the fact you didn’t call them kids but pups. Your pups. He suddenly wanted to fuck you again. Maybe when his knot dies down he will but for now, he needs you to rest. “Of course, I want our pups baby. I plan on spending the rest of my life with you.” He kissed you slowly, passionately. Your hand cupped his hand, smiling wide at his low giggles. Your legs wiggled suddenly straddling him. “Come on baby. You need to rest.”
You sat up, drawing circles with your hips. Bucky groaned gripping your waist tightly, bucking his head backwards. “I don’t need to rest. I want more….” You leaned down kissing his cheek before whispering. “Alpha….”
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𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞
「 ✦ bucky barnes ✦ 」
ׂ╰┈➤18+ none of these stories belong to me! this is a masterlist of all bucky barnes stories i’ve read and reblogged! just thought it would be nice to have them all in one spot! (if your fic is on here and you wish not to be, please let me know!) some with have summaries if provided <3
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𓇼 video games by @twoghostsfromeden
𓆉Sam Wilson attempts to teach Bucky how to play video games, but you have a different idea
𓇼 just like dad by @ladyfallonavenger
𓆉 The Reader loses Bucky in the snap and life presents a whole new challenge.
𓇼 coming in hot by @nexusnyx (ao3 link)
𓆉When your best friend Sarah recommends you a mechanic of her brother’s trust, all you can think about and pray to is that he doesn’t rip you off. Your car is your prized possession and amidst all the worry and concern of your medical studies, drowning in even more debt sounds as suffocating as it would be.
Of course, you never thought of the possibility of the mechanic being the problem. A hot, polite, gentle, and silent-type of problem.
Drowning in debt would be easier to navigate than the blue of Bucky Barnes’s eyes.
𓇼wallpaper by @cosmicbucky
𓆉 bucky finds out how to change the wallpaper on your phone, and takes every opportunity he can to do so. until one day he doesn't have the heart to.
𓇼 consequences by @duuhrayliegh
𓇼@ellemj
𓆉 letters to santa pt2
𓆉 need and wants
𓇼 trust by @kgficz
𓆉Set during the end of ‘Captain America: The Winter Soldier’. You had been forced to work as a nurse for Hydra’s soldiers, you never expected The Winter Soldier to be one of them. What happens when he starts to care about you?
𓇼 glitter and goo by @welldonebeca
𓆉 When you have to go on a mission to a different planet together, Bucky is hit by a mating ritual flower, and some feelings you two have been hiding come up
𓇼 accidental pic by @mostlymarvelsstuff
𓆉Reader recives Buckys nudes accidentally
𓇼 just friends by @cadaverousnight
𓆉A night of drinking makes Bucky bold and a harmless text makes him bolder
𓇼 @espinosaurusrexex
𓆉Worlds Collide
🫧 The world is ending. And there are two types of people: The ones that embrace the last pieces of happiness left, and the ones that just don’t bother anymore. When those two clash, there’s no way of knowing what will happen. But maybe, some hopes and dreams aren’t so different after all and the both of them get a chance at becoming more than just acquaintances.
𓆉 refuge
🫧 You had a track record of cracking tough cases, but this one proved to be your breaking point. The Winter Soldier was out there, thirsting for blood, operating in total anonymity, and leaving a trail of bodies in the cold Colorado snow. Then, just as a snowstorm was about to paralyse the town, Bucky Barnes appeared on your doorstep – lost, sweet, and in dire need of help. It all seems too good to be true, but what happens when his secrets come to haunt him and Bucky’s blurred past reveals a predicament neither of you saw coming?
𓆉happy little accidents
🫧 In a world after the war, Bucky tries to get pieces of his old self back by joining an art class. He meets you and instantly falls head over heels. Now he just has to work up the courage to ask you out.
𓆉serious questions
🫧 Bucky agrees to go on a date to make his colleagues shut up. Now, he just feels sorry for the poor woman that has to spend an entire evening with him. He really tries to make it work, though, because he actually enjoys her company.
𓆉 bad boys don’t buy flowers
🫧 Bucky would have never thought, he’d be chasing after a girl. Not when all of them usually fell at his feet. But when he finds himself entangled in a deal born out of a desperate argument with his assistant, he realizes there is nothing he wouldn't do for you: The independent florist who is adamantly dragging him to the homeless shelter every chance she gets. There is just one problem: Bucky doesn't know how to tell you. And the teasing from his friends is certainly not making things easier for him...
𓆉request oneshot
𓇼 @pellucid-constellations
𓆉 unexpected
🫧 With all of his rough edges and impassive glances, Bucky Barnes looked to be the last person you’d find at an elementary school bake sale. Too bad Steve couldn’t make it, and dealing with a class hopped up on sugar wasn’t a feat you could manage alone
𓆉 i need him like water
🫧 You think Bucky’s having an affair. He thinks… well you aren’t sure what he thinks. But he must notice the living room light is left on. Every night.
𓆉 flowers in the compound
🫧 That girl from the flower shop seems to be taking up a lot of Bucky’s time.
𓆉 request one shot
🫧 You knew Bucky didn't like his arm. You just didn't know how much until he accidentally hurt you with it.
𓆉 counting
🫧 Time heals all wounds. Bucky’d been holding onto that proverb ever since blip. But time had never been particularly kind to him, so he opted to keep track of the sweet girl’s in his apartment building instead, the one that made him banana bread and took him to diners at two in the morning. Sometimes, you didn’t keep the same schedule. That made Bucky panic.
𓇼 everybody talks by @nickfowlerrr
𓇼 @buckyalpine
𓆉come back to you
🫧 What happens when a time travel mission ends up with a version of Bucky from the 40′s standing on the time travel platform. 
𓆉 did you hear
𓆉 40s bucky w/ nurse!reader
𓆉 sunshine
𓆉 spiral
𓆉 pick me
𓆉 untouched
𓆉 tongue twister
𓆉 wait what pt2 pt3 pt4
𓆉 can you not pt2 pt3
𓆉 choices pt2
𓇼 aching by @bbyboybucket
𓆉After Reader gives Bucky a massage, he realizes how much he likes her touch
𓇼 tiny match maker by @jamdoughnutmagician
𓆉 Adjusting to his new life outside of the superhero business, Bucky makes the acquaintance of a very young, inquisitive girl.
𓇼 metal arm brrr by @bombsonboard
𓆉 Every problem needs a solution. Bucky just isn't the biggest fan of yours.
𓇼 the cards were dealt by @bucky-fricking-barnes
𓆉Bucky and Y/N are the children of the two most prominent mob bosses in New York. When their parents use them as part of a deal, they’re left to figure out how their lives fit together.
𓇼 @holylulusworld
𓆉 a different kind of valentine pt2
🫧 Your fiancé breaks your heart on Valentine’s Day out of all days.
𓆉 happy birthday big grump
🫧 Your new neighbor is a professional grump. No reason to not be nice to him on his birthday.
𓇼 siren be bound to me by @darkdemeter
𓆉He is your captain. There is no place you'd rather be than by his side, nothing you could ever want for that is not him. You owe everything, your entire self, to him.
And yet overboard and on the tide you set sail across in search for a great and ancient treasure, a song continues to seep through the cracks of your heart and soul... a song so familiar yet unknown.
Forgotten. And Bucky reminds you yet again that there no place else for you that isn't beside him, that there is nothing out there
𓇼 to have and to hold harm by @queers-gambit
𓆉after rescuing you from kidnappers, you overhear your boyfriend-turned-savior complain about how clingy you've become
𓇼 @thighs-of-betrayal-blog
𓆉 jealous bucky
𓆉 request oneshot
𓆉 hold the door
🫧 You’ve never met your new neighbor, not until an incident happens involving the apartments elevator. 
𓇼 out of practice by @drabbles-mc
𓆉 reader is a mom, bucky hasn't dated in like 70 years
𓇼 @jobean12-blog
𓆉 next door to love
🫧 When you made the move to the city you never expected your new neighbor to be so sweet and helpful...or hot.
𓆉 this spells love
🫧 Bucky is your best friend and he really is the best but he wants more, he wants everything, but the idea that it could ruin your friendship and he could lose you is too much...
𓇼 meet my family by @skaye44
𓆉Your parents want to meet your boyfriend Bucky which you agree, but the whole family invites itself along for the meeting.
𓇼 my sun my star pt2 pt3 by @cosmos-coma
𓆉 You wait up late for your boyfriend Bucky to return from his mission, but it isn't Bucky who finds you
𓇼 @mrsbarnesblog
𓆉 my everything
🫧 The last thing that Bucky ever expected to see was the love of his life from the past trapped in one of the Hydra bunkers in the cryofreeze chamber. Yet here he was almost two days later, staring at your still unconscious body through the window at the medical wing, imagining the horror and disgust on your face when you found out that he was no longer the innocent and happy boy you knew before
𓆉 i trust you
🫧 when Bucky comes back from a mission with a knife wound there is only one person who can convince him to get help
𓇼 5+1 by @mrs-illyrian-baby
𓆉 Whether it's on a mission, a work event or a holiday, your sleeping arrangements never seem to work out as planned. It doesn't really bother you until...it does. Confronted with a night sleeping apart, you and Bucky finally talk
𓇼 just like that by @navybrat817
𓆉Bucky suggests staying in a hotel together before an undercover mission, which would be fine if you didn't have a massive crush on the super soldier.
𓇼 @sergeantbuckybarnes
𓆉 begin again everything i wanted
🫧 When you go to meet your friend at her work you see a cute guy had been stood up, so you’re going to be the best date of his life.
𓆉 amnesia
🫧 During a fight in Madripoor you get hit in the head resulting in forgetting the last ten years of your life. And most important, your boyfriend.
𓇼 diamonds by @angrythingstarlight
𓇼 @literaryavenger
𓆉 not so bad
🫧 It's Bucky's birthday, but doesn't want to make a big deal out of it.
𓆉 happy birthday
🫧 It's your birthday and the only person who doesn't seem to be excited about it is you
𓇼 body and soul by @theladybarnes
𓆉 Reader has a conversation with Sam that leaves her a little confused before her date with Bucky. Includes probably the best romance movie quote to ever grace films.
𓇼 you’re my desire pt2 by @marvelouslizzie
𓆉Your best friend drags you out on a double date. You were supposed to be Steve Rogers' date, but plans change pretty quickly and you end up in Bucky Barnes' arms.
𓇼 she chose me by @notafunkiller
𓆉Steve's hopes get crushed when he wrongly assumes you'd choose him over Bucky.
𓇼 bucky has a crush by @assembletheimagines
𓇼 buckyvision by @fictionalmemoirs
𓆉 pt1 pt2 pt3 pt4 pt5 pt5.5 pt6 pt7 pt8 pt9 pt10
•masterlist
hopefully all links work, let me know if not <3
last update march 18, 2024
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sunnymoonxx · 1 month
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❝what was rule number #2 again❞ I.| bucky barnes x reader
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pairing: tfatws bucky x reader summary: messing around in banner's lab, the night before your mission wasn't as good an idea as you thought, and you begin to question your actions the moment you step out of it. things worsen when you realize the super soldier serum isn't immune to an unknown contagious disease. warnings: sex pollen, no warnings this part, the II one? hahaha
a/n: I may have insulted the reader a few times in the beginning, so I apologize for that. but let's be honest, we'd do the same. I decided to split this fic into two parts because if I wrote it all into one part, it'd have 10k words. I'm not an english native speaker, so forgive me my sins and bad grammar if you find something.
m.list
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You weren't stupid. But you also weren't exactly smart. If you were, you would've minded your own business, stayed in the gym, and went through the plan for tomorrow's mission. Maybe even go to bed a little sooner, to be ready for the next day's alarm. But Banner was away for a business trip, and seeing his lab silent and alone didn't exactly sing you lullabies to sleep. That's why you found yourself standing in the heart of it at 3 a.m., in your pajamas, praying everyone was asleep. It was well known around the compound that Banner's and Stark's labs were a faraway island, and anybody with a brain would circle around them. But you were an excellent swimmer and sharks didn't scare you.
10 hours later, you realised why Banner turned green every time someone even glared the glass door of his science play room. You were a fast swimmer but not exactly a bright one. The only bright thing related to you was that you were easily struck by it. And the glowing pink flowers in Doc's terrarium took you down faster than the sharks. It was bright pink with purple shadows. It reminded you of passionflower, but it was bigger. Way bigger, and you weren't sure if you were hallucinating, but the feeling of the flower's filaments moving was too strong. They were moving in waves, then circles, then each moved in its own way. It was mesmerising.
It was too late before you realized you moved the flower out of its enclosure to get a closer look at it. The smell hit you hard, filling your brain with colorful fog. You smelled a dash of cinnamon, mixed with ginger and lavender. You couldn't miss the powerful vanilla and pumpkin filling up the room. You didn't realize how bad the consequences of smelling Doc's flower would be until you came undone under your fingers nearly seven times. And it still wasn't enough. The scheduled time of your and Barnes' meeting was quickly approaching, and your skin didn't feel less on fire than it did two hours ago.
You managed to get out of the sweaty mattress and put some clothes on you, loose ones, hoping that your skin could breathe a little. You prayed some air would cool you down, clear your head, and slap some sense into you. It was now obvious why Banner was so determined not to let anyone close his lab. He was experimenting with aphrodisiacs, and you, unwillingly, became one of his lab rats. Thoughts didn't stop multiplying in your head until one landed steadily on its feet. Tony has been visiting Doc's labs the last few weeks, five minutes on the dot after curfew. You knew because you were always stationed on your balcony, which gave you a clear view of the other building, and its glass windows didn't hide much. It only became pitch black when Tony came in, and Banner didn't even flinch when he heard the door shut.
Chuckle left your lips when you connected the dots, ignoring how amusing you must look for Barnes, sitting right next to him.
"Something funny?" he asked, not dropping his gaze off of you. You were now on your way to the target's last seen place, being lucky enough to get a ride in Tony's self-driven car. You wanted to drown him in kisses because you can only imagine the suffering if you had to walk all the way from the compound to the other side of the city. Your skin was still on fire, your hair was sticking to your neck, and salty drops chased each other on your skin. You certainly were an amusing sight to Bucky. Or a terrifying one. You wished he got used to it by now. After all these years of fighting against each other, then with each other, and now forced to fight by each other's side, he saw you through worse conditions. But as far as he knew, you were locked in your room all week. You had no reason to look like you had an early meeting with the reaper.
"Just, thinking," you mumbled back at him, forcing yourself to keep your head rested against your seat, begging your body to not betray you for looking back at your partner. Your body fighting the chemicals in your body, you could only imagine how it would end if you stared at Barnes for more than five seconds. Worse, let alone if you touched him. You read about aphrodisiacs and scientists' failed attempts to know what you were going through. You were prepared to die before touching Barnes.
You were secretly jealous. It wasn't fair of you, but Barnes' serum running through his veins protected him from anything related. You almost abandoned your morals, but the pain you were going through justified it. You had no idea how you were going to focus on the mission, communicate with James, and, if it came to it, fight the target. You could only focus on the heat between your legs and how touch-starved you were. And your, undeniably, attractive coworker wasn't helping the case.
You and James had a complicated history. Both born in the 40s and dated for a while before he fell from the train. Years later, he comes to kill you for Howard's successful experiment on you. Immortality would definitely suit HYDRA and their planned assassinations. James, back then, the Winter Soldier, failed to capture you, so they decided your family's fate. And your friends. Then, years later, Howard's. You forgave him. All of it. Because you knew it wasn't him. But when he came back from Wakanda, with no traces of HYDRA in him, and didn't spare you a glance, you couldn't forgive him that. Seventy years of tolerating the actions HYDRA made him do, and he couldn't even look at you. It broke your heart but rather to act like a cunt than a weepy baby, begging for attention that will never come.
"Well then, do it fast. We're almost there." You hear his grumpy voice, making the butterflies in your stomach double their count. The decades-old memories of you together overwhelmed your brain like a tsunami. You couldn't swim out of that. The way his tongue circled your clit as you played with his hair at the theatre restroom. Or when he made you ride his face with Steve in the house. The way he pounded into you against the wall so you wouldn't forget him when he gets shipped out the next morning. And the way he had to cover your mouth that night at the bar, celebrating his unit's rescue. Now he was sitting millimetres away from you, and he wouldn't have done any of it. You still hoped, subconsciously, he'd dick you down like he did all those years ago. But that was a fantasy. Very vivid, real fantasy.
"Yes, sir," you let out, closing your eyes, tugging on your shirt so your fingers wouldn't accidentally slip in between your thighs. You didn't wanna make a scene. Even tho at some point, you knew you would.
You didn't catch James' hungry gaze when he heard those words slip from your mouth. At the back of his head, he reminiscent the amount of times it was him, slipping out of it.
It took you exactly 17 minutes before you got yourself out of Tony's car. You accidentally grinded yourself on his leather seats, causing you to accidentally moan, and of course, Barnes caught it. He'd never miss that sweet sound leaving your lips. At nights, he wished he'd made you sound like that, even louder. But that was ages ago, and you were over him. It was the only thing that made sense to him.
Five minutes into your romantic stroll to the target's office, the wetness in your panties got worse. You figured the more you moved, the less it hurt, but the pleasure doubled. And the Avengers training lessons didn't exactly cover how to act if you're orgasming every five seconds just because your thighs rubbed against each other.
Correction, you didn't actually cum. It was more of a frustrating edging that made you wanna rip out your hair. You were sure Barnes had already figured something was off or had at least suspected something. The suppressed moans and the tugging on your crotch weren't exactly subtle.
"Alright," he stopped walking, a few meters away from a huge building. It was surrounded by a deep forest, straight from a horror movie. "he was last seen inside. If Steve's correct, we should..." You kept nodding, not actually paying attention to what he was saying. It was the way his metal arm moved when he talked and the way his fingers curled while explaining the plan. You never got the answer to your question if he could feel through his amputated arm. He had to, you thought. You heard him groan every time someone pulled it too hard. You were embarrassed how much it roused you when you heard him whimper in pain, but it was also one of the things that circled your head when you were alone in your room.
You'd imagine, would it feel different. It would definitely be cold, rougher, you suspected faster. And with the serum running in his veins, he'd definitely last longer. That, you were one hundred percent sure, for it was Natasha's moans you heard for over two days after she and Steve finally hit it off. But Nat was also a super soldier. Bucky would probably tire you out by the 2nd round. But you were willing to risk it.
"If you're not gonna be listening to me, then you can turn around and go back." Was the first thing you heard after you forced yourself out of Bucky's hand around your throat fantasies. It probably wasn't the best idea, but seeing Bucky frustrated and annoyed by your incompetence made you feel things. And you wanted more.
"Whatever you want, Sergeant." You smirked, walking past him towards the building. His smell punched you in the face, making your walls clench around nothing. Fuck. Your self-control was harder to put in check. You were sure in a few minutes it'd be non-existent.
"Whatever is your problem today," you heard him behind you. You didn't look at him, focusing on keeping a steady pace towards the building so you could finish the job, get home where you could fuck yourself to oblivion. No one, but your fingers were currently available. And even they couldn't sometimes do the job you needed. But you knew whose would.
"I'm talking to you." Your heart dropped when his hand landed on your shoulder. Your skin got warmer again, and the pulse between your legs was impossible to ignore. You didn't know if you wanted to kill him or fuck him.
Ideally, both.
Turning around, you found the strength to twist his arm, finding out it was his human one, making it easier to push him back. He looked so taken back that it was amusing. But not amusing enough to stop the aching of your cunt.
"Touch me again," and I won't answer for the consequences. You wanted to add. But you didn't. Instead, you stared back at him, praying to god you'd drop dead or something would happen to stop the throbbing pain. You wanted to push your pants down and do something about it, but Bucky's presence wouldn't let you. It would, seventy years ago.
God, the number of times he made you rub yourself in front of him, fuck yourself while he watched. Couldn't he do it now? You'd happily obey.
"You've been acting distant ever since morning," he said, taking a step closer. "I just wanna know what's wrong," he said, lowering his voice at the end. You were sure it was just the stupid plant making you see things, but Bucky's dark eyes were hard to miss. Or the sweat on his forehead. Or the way he clenched his jaw when his eyes dropped to your lips.
Your heart sank. Holy fuck.
You couldn't help but laugh. It was, after all, comical. You looked manic but that didn't bother you. You felt so many emotions at once that you struggled to choose one.
"What the hell are you doing," you heard his voice interrupt your laugh. You were out of your mind. Your legs weak and sweaty, your cunt covered in your wetness, your head filled with migraine, skin on fire, and thoughts surrounding only one thing. And now, cherry on top, you realize Banner discovered an aphrodisiacs that make the super soldier serum its bitch. James motherfucking Barnes joined the lab rats of Banner's sex research.
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mrs-bucky-barnes106 · 4 months
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b.b. headcannons (pt 1.)
part 2. part 3. part 4.
bucky barnes who loves your squeals of joy when he randomly throws you over his shoulder. bucky barnes who brings you your favorite flowers once a week so your home never has dead flowers. bucky barnes who dims the lights and plays a slow song for you to dance in the living to every night before bed. bucky barnes who carries you to bed when you fall asleep on the couch. bucky barnes who sits you on the bathroom counter and stands in between your thighs to clean up your wound even if it's just a minor scrape. bucky barnes who surprises you by buying things you mentioned liking once.
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"Guess I'm Just Good With Them"
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AU: James "Bucky" Barnes x SingleMom!Reader
SUMMARY: Meeting a random stranger in a Walmart and allowing him to calm your screeching baby is totally fine, right?......Right?
WARNINGS: A lot of fluff, slight insecurities of being a single mother, swearing (Each chapter will have its own individual warnings)
CHAPTERS:
CHP 1
CHP2
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imtryingbuck · 2 months
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Fifteen
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Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem!Reader
Summary: Bucky comes from a well respected family, he falls in love with a girl who prefers the simple things in life. Follow their journey through the years.
Word count: 4,736
Warnings: fluff, angst, heavy use of pet names. Bucky and y/n argue and that’s a warning in itself. Brock rumlow, Bucky being a bad friend. Swearing. Bullying.
A/N: No description of reader other than she has curly hair.
Masterlist   Series Masterlist
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Like every morning she waited outside for Bucky, Steve and Sam to arrive so they could all walk to school together. Y/n was so excited when she found out that she was going to be going to school with her two friends, though she was a year below them.
Sam was the boys’ friend first and when he was introduced to Y/n he instantly became her friend, throwing his arm around her he winked at her causing the girl to blush. Bucky wasn’t happy.
Sighing she checked her watch, the same one Bucky had brought her for her birthday last year, they was late.
She didn’t want to be in trouble for being late so she decided to head off on her own, as she pulled her bag further up her shoulder she kept her head down whilst walking the streets.
“Y/n! Y/n slow down!” Sam’s booming voice came from behind her.
“I can’t I’m going to be late!” She shouted back to him.
“H-hold on, Jesus woman you’re making me run today aren’t you?”
Feeling his arms wrap themselves around her waist she comes to a halt. “Where’s Ducky?”
“Ah he, never mind. Steve hurry up!”
“Sam where is he? Is he ill? Oh god he is isn’t he?”
“No Sugar he’s not, he’s just not walking with us this morning”
“Hey Y/n/n” Steve panted as he pulls his friend into a hug.
“Hi Stevie where’s Ducky?”
“With Dot”
“Dude!” Sam scolded.
“Wh-who’s Dot?”
“His girlfriend” Steve admits rubbing the back of his neck. “I’m sorry”
“H-he has a girlfriend? Oh”
She couldn’t understand why her heart hurt at hearing that.
“If it makes you feel any better, me and Sam don’t like her”
“I want to go to school now”
Throughout her lessons she couldn’t find it in herself to concentrate, he had a girlfriend and didn’t tell her - why didn’t he tell her? Was she pretty? Did she know who she was? Was they going to be friends still?
“-Y/n!”
“Huh? Sorry Sir”
“Class is over…go”
“Right sorry Sir, see you tomorrow”
Shoving all her things into her school bag she heads down to wait outside the cafeteria for the boys to show. Like that morning she checks her watch and sighing, they’re late.
Her stomach growled and giving up waiting for them to show she heads into the cafeteria when she comes to a stop.
They were already there, sat at the table that was unofficially reserved for the four of them.
Her eyes watered at seeing a brunette sat in her place, next to her Ducky. She watched as he threw his arm around her and pulled her into him just like he always did to her. She watched as Sam and Steve laugh about something the girl said.
“Ow, I’m sorry” she stutters out after she’s pushed over.
“Move out of the way freak” Brock. The schools bully. Or as Y/n called him behind his back ‘Brock the rock’ no it wasn’t a compliment at his muscles but an insult, Brock rhymed with rock and rocks where dumb just like Brock.
“I-I’m sorry” she stutters as she tries to move out of the way.
“Aw you going to cry you little freak?” He says loudly catching everyone’s attention.
“N-no-“
“I think she is Brock” laughed Jack, another bully who followed Brock wherever he went.
“The little freak is going to cry!” Brock boomed causing her to flinch.
He takes it one step further by pushing her in to Jack who then shoves her away violently back to Brock, back and forth she was pushed between the two.
Y/n’s frantic eyes met Bucky’s who had been watching the whole thing along with everyone else. She nearly burst out crying when all he did was look down.
“Looks like your little boyfriend isn’t coming to the rescue this time freak” Brock whispers as he clutches her shirt tightly in his grip just before pushing her roughly onto the ground.
She waits until Brock and his lackeys leave before standing up, looking up towards the table she’s normally sat at with her friends her heart breaks when she sees the back of Bucky’s head and Steve and Sam looking down at their food.
Running out of the cafeteria she runs to the bathroom where she locks herself away until the loud shrill of the bell goes off.
Throughout the day she was glad she didn’t see any of the boys or Brock and Jack as she moved from one class to the next. Stuck in her own mind she couldn’t understand why neither one of her friends stuck up for her like they’ve done before whenever Brock was acting tough now that Tony had left school.
Were they my friends now? Why didn’t Bucky tell me he had a girlfriend? Why didn’t Steve and Sam stick up for me?
They were some of the many questions that swirled around her head as her last teacher Mr Levinson droned on.
When the bell rang throughout the school she took her time in packing her things, waiting for everyone to leave.
“Y/n?”
“Yes sir?”
“Is everything okay?”
“Yes sir, why?”
“Well you’re normally the first one out of the class” he chuckles.
“Oh. No everything’s okay sir” she smiled up at him as she brought the strap of her bag up her arm.
“Okay, I’ll see you tomorrow remember you’ve got me for two periods”
“I know sir, I’ll see you tomorrow” waving bye to her favourite teacher she walks out of the class, slowly walking to the entrance. Like Mr Levinson said she was normally the first one out of class, and normally she was running through the halls to wait outside for the boys to arrive so they could head to the sweet shop on the corner of Main Street but today she was in no rush, no rush in seeing the spot she always waited at to being empty.
As she stepped out of the doors she felt stupid for hoping that they would have waited for her, they hadn’t.
As she walked past the sweet shop she heard Sam’s loud laughter filter through the gap in the door, her heart pounding loudly in her chest as she saw Sam, Steve and Bucky all laughing in the store, she swore her heart broke when she saw Bucky grab ahold of the brunettes hand from lunch and pulling her to place his lips to hers. Y/n brought her fingers to her lips softly touching them wondering how the girl in the store felt kissing Bucky.
Shaking her head and wiping her tears she walks off before any of them sees her.
“Hello angel-angel what’s wrong?” Howard asks when she walks in and straight pass him without saying hello or telling him how her day went, or better yet without her handing him her packet full to the brim of sweets so he could pick one - or if she was letting him feel cheeky two - out.
“Nothing dad I’m going to do my homework”
“Angel come here, or don’t I’ll just follow you” he mutters following her upstairs and into her room.
“Dad, please I just want to do my homework and go to sleep”
“Not until you tell me what’s happened? You’re not normally back yet, is Lloyds closed?”
“No. I-I just really need to get this homework done”
“Where’s the boys?”
“I-dad please”
“Not until you tell me what’s going on? You seem to forget angel I know you and I know something is wrong, so spill”
“Duc-Bucky has a girlfriend…”
“Oh…oh. I’m sorry angel”
“It’s okay, I just don’t have any friends anymore” she shrugs, looking at the photograph she had hanging up on her wall. Her, Bucky, Sam and Steve standing in front of the stall at the fair ground, Bucky’s arm wrapped around her waist as her hand was on his chest. All four of them smiling widely at the camera as Maria takes the photo.
“Of course you’ll still have friends angel, the boys will still be your friends”
“No they won’t. Steve and Sam were friends with Bucky before they were my friends”
“Bucky’s still you friend darling just because he has a girlfriend doesn’t mean shit-don’t tell your mother I just swore in front of you”
“I won’t” she giggles.
“Is there anything else you’re not telling me?”
She hadn’t found the courage to tell her parents about the bullying or how bad it was, knowing how they would react she didn’t want to make it any worse than it already was.
“No dad everything’s okay I promise”
“Okay…well tomorrow is Friday and you know what that means don’t you? That’ll prove that the boys are still your friends”
Shortly after Howard leaves so she could start her homework. Not that she does it.
Friday, tomorrow is Friday. Every weekend her, Steve and Sam heads to Bucky’s house for a sleepover. Was she still invited? Was Bucky’s girlfriend going to be there?
Her head pounded and her eyes stung so she climbed into bed falling asleep as her stomach growled in hunger it only then occurred to her that she hadn’t ate anything since breakfast, it didn’t stop her from falling into a restless sleep.
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The next morning she moved along with the motions. Getting dressed, brushing her hair and teeth, eating breakfast, she puts her shoes on pressing a kiss to her parents their cheeks she says her goodbyes.
She hesitates outside whether she should wait for the boys to show or not she finally forces her legs to move, she wasn’t going to be waiting on them. Not anymore.
“Oi freak!” Brock shouted as he walks across the road to where she was, she carried on walking keeping her head down.
“Freak don’t ignore him” Jack says.
She felt hands on her back before she was shoved down on to the ground scraping her hands and her knees. “W-what do you want?”
“Your lunch”
“No”
“What?” Don’t ask her Brock she’s just as shocked as you at her sticking up for herself.
“I said no, are you deaf?” Shut up shut up shut up her brain screams at her.
“Funny, don’t worry freak you’re going to regret this” Brock says before picking her bag up and throwing it over a fence.
Watching the pair walk off she stands up and looks down at her knees, great they’re bleeding. Opening the gate she walks over to the door and knocks, waiting patiently she waits for the owner to open up.
“Hello?”
“Hi Sir, my bag got thrown over your fence could I please get it?”
“Sure…”
“It’s over that fence” she points at the wooden fence that leads to the backyard she assumes.
“Oh, yeah sure hold on I’ll get the key” he walks back inside and returns quickly with the key “are you okay?”
“Yes Sir, are you?”
“I’m fine but I’m talking about your knees and hands, they’re bleeding”.
“Bullies Sir”
“Oh, nasty little parasites aren’t they?”
“Yes Sir” she giggles “thank you Sir” she says as he hands over her bag back to her.
“You’re welcome and hey listen don’t let them get to you okay? It will get better soon I can promise you that”
“H-how do you know?”
“I was bullied when I was at school but here I am owning a business that continues to grow even long after I’ve retired” he smiles softly.
“Wow, I-I don’t know why they pick on me I’ve never done anything wrong to them”
“Because they see the potential in you and they are scared because they haven’t gotten any so they spend their time and energy trying to bring you down”
“Oh, well I wish they would stop”
“They will you just have to wait them out”
“Thank you Sir, I best get going I’m…crap I’m late”
“Go go, and call me Stan”
“Y/n, bye Mr Stan”
“Well it’s actually Mr Lee but go your late” the older man chuckles.
“I’m going I’m going” she laughs waving at him.
Practically running to school she runs to her class “I’m sorry Miss” 
“It’s okay Y/n just make sure it doesn’t happen again”
“It won’t Miss I promise”
Ms Ford was an older teacher who taught maths whether it’s because of her age or because of how long she had been teaching for she simply didn’t care if you was late or not, as long as you didn’t cause any trouble then it was fine.
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When the bell rang signalling for it to be lunch she slowly moved towards the bathroom so she could eat, on her way there she saw two of Brock’s friends walking towards her before she had a chance to do anything they grabbed her arms and dragged her backwards, leading her into the cafeteria.
No one blinks an eye or tries to help her out.
She’s shoved onto her knees in front of Brock, she shifts and in the corner of her eye she sees Bucky, Steve and Sam all staring.
“This little freak had the balls to talk back to me this morning and well I can’t let that happen” he told everyone. “Stand the freak up”
She’s roughly pulled up by her arms “did you all know that her dad killed her mom? Or that this little freak was in an orphanage?” He laughs.
“Shut up Brock” she says, mentally slapping herself for talking back.
“Ooh the freak speaks once again. Hey Bucky doesn’t this dog belong to you?” She’s spun around so she has no choice but to look at him, who once again just stares down.
“No? Not going to say anything? Wow some friend you are” Brock chuckles. “Hey guys want to see what she’s hiding under her shirt? My mom was a nurse who had to touch this freak”
Y/n’s eyes widen and she starts to struggle against the hold that the two boys had on her arms. “No no no Brock I’m sorry I’m sorry you don’t have to do this! I’m sorry”
Ignoring her pleads he just smirks at her “hold her steady boys”
“Brock stop!” Steve says shakily from the table.
“Shut up or your next. Stop struggling freak”
“Please s-stop! Please-D-Ducky help! No no no no no please no” she screams out as Brock rips her shirt off leaving her scarred back exposed to nearly the whole school.
“Disgusting isn’t it?” Brock laughs.
The murmurs and laughters are drowned out by the roaring of blood filling her ears, the moment she’s dropped to the ground she wraps her hands over her chest and runs out of the cafeteria and out of the school. Her vision was blurred as she ran faster than she’s ever ran before.
“Y/n-oh my lord, come here darling” an older voice says that she recognised from earlier.
“M-m-Mr Stan”
“I’m not going to hurt you, I’m going to put my coat around you okay?” As soon as the material was around her she collapsed into his arms.
“Darling le-let’s get you into the car and I’ll take you home okay?”
Everything moves in a blur, she doesn’t even realise that Mr Stan pulls up to her house or that he’s knocking on the door talking to her father or that her father comes rushing out of the house.
“Angel, angel come here”
“D-Dada” she cries clinging to him.
Howard lifts her out of the car and takes her into the house calling out for Maria who comes out of the kitchen. He takes her upstairs to her room where he lays her gently on the bed his heart breaking at the way she still clings on to him.
Leaving Maria to help Y/n get dressed and clean her injuries up he heads down the stairs to where Stan was still waiting.
“Come with me Stan” leading the older man into his office “what happened?”
“I met her this morning when she knocked on my door a bully had thrown her bag over my fence, we spoke a little before she left for school”
“A bully? Y/n’s being bullied?”
“So she says Sir”
“Howard, you know this Stan. Anyway carry on”
“Well I was driving home when she ran out into the road clutching…covering her chest. Her top half was naked. I got out and put my coat around her and brought her home”
“D-Did she say anything?”
“No, she just cried”
“Thank you for bringing her home Stan, here here’s some money” Howard pulls out a huge wad of money from the draw of his desk.
“Howard, I don’t want your money son. She’s a sweet girl who doesn’t deserve half of the shit she’s gone through”
“Yo-you know?”
“Well…yes. She was in the newspapers. Just make sure she’s okay for me, I’ll see myself out goodbye Howard”
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“Y/n, angel please talk to us” Howard pleads as he sits next to Maria on Y/ns bed.
“I-it doesn’t matter”
“Of course it does sweetie, we need to deal with this” Maria speaks softly.
“I’m a freak! My back is disgusting. I-I should of died when my real dad tried to kill me”
Taken back by her confession Maria clutches her chest with shaky hands, Howard stutters trying to find the right words.
“A-Angel you don’t mean that”
“I do. I’m tired of being bullied, I’ve tried dad to make friends I have I swear but nobody wants to be friends with a freak. I don’t get why they call me names or steal my lunch or push me into things. I hate going to school. I hate Sam. I hate Steve. An-and I hate James. I hate my life, I wish I was dead” a shuddering breath leaves her lips as her whole body trembles.
She didn’t mean to tell them about the bullying or about how she hated her friends because even though they didn’t talk to her or stick up for her she didn’t hate them, they were her only friends.
She definitely didn’t mean to tell them how she wished she was dead.
“Y/n Stark you take that back!” Maria scolds.
“No! And let’s be honest mom the only reason you two adopted me was out of pity and because George probably asked you too just so James could keep me around” her voice raised and shook, mentally scolding herself for saying that because now she had to sit there and watch as the tears gathered in her mommas eyes.
“Is-is that what you really think?”
“It wasn’t pity that we felt when we adopted you Y/n, it was because I genuinely believed that you had a very special place in our family and I still believe that even after all these years. George never asked us to take you in.” Howard speaks.
“I-I-oh momma I’m so sorry! Dada I swear I didn’t mean it” she cries her eyes bouncing from one parent to the next.
“Angel, it’s okay. Oh sweetheart come here” Howard opens his arms waiting for his daughter to climb into them, rubbing his hand up and down her back not flinching or feeling disgusted when he feels the scars under her shirt.
“I’m sorry” she repeats over and over.
“Sweetheart we love you and just because you’re not biologically ours doesn’t make a difference, you are our daughter through and through” Maria says softly wiping the tears that fall onto her cheeks.
“I-I don’t want to go to school anymore momma please don’t make me go back”
“We’ll talk about it later okay? Get some sleep and we’ll talk about everything” Maria promises watching as she nods and climbs back into bed. 
A few hours later after Maria had managed to calm down Howard who was quite literally on a war path there was a knock on the door, Maria walked over to the door opening it she saw Sam and Steve standing there with sheepish looks on their faces.
“What are you two doing here?”
“W-we want to see Y/n, is-is she okay?”
“She is now. Where is James?”
“With Dot…”
“Charming. I don’t think Y/n will want to see you tonight, please leave”
“Miss Maria we’re really sorry, please tell Y/n that.”
“I will do. Goodbye boys”
Watching as the boys walk away with their tails in between their legs she shakes her head, she hates turning them away but when it comes to her daughter she’ll do everything to protect her, even if it’s from her friends.
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The next day Y/n woke with a pounding headache, the memories of what she had said to her parents made her stomach hurt. She hated herself for making her mom cry, seeing the hurt flash in her parents eyes made her want to burst out crying.
She never wanted her parents to find out that she was being bullied afraid it made her look weak, made her look like she needed them to save her again. She wanted to be strong just like Tony, be the social butterfly just like her brother instead of being social outcast that she was. 
Y/n had tried to fit in she really did, she tried to be someone that she wasn’t. She found it hard to be around the other girls who were interested in make up, the latest fashion and boys, none of them things she cared about.
Okay maybe she was interested in boys she noticed them obviously, especially one in particular. Bucky.
But sadly that didn’t matter anymore, not now that he had a girlfriend.
Y/n preferred the simpler things that life had to offer, she never cared for all pretty dresses her mom would get her or all of the expensive things her dad would give her. She preferred getting mud all over her, climbing trees, talking to the animals she encountered. Her hair was always messy and nine out of ten times her hair would have leaves tangled in it. Her clothes would have grass stains on them from where she would either roll around in the grass or from where she would kneel down getting closer to the insects she came upon.
She never truly understood why the other kids called her a freak, maybe she was but that didn’t matter right? She had a heart and feelings and she was just the same as everyone else.
“Angel, James is here to see you” Howard knocks on her bedroom door pulling her out of her trance.
Might as well as get this over and done with.
“Let him in dad”
“I’m just downstairs if you need me angel”
“Okay”
She sits up so she’s leaning against the headboard, twisting her ring that her dad had gotten her when she had gotten an A on a test. She watches as the door handle goes down a little bit and the door comes open revealing her Ducky.
“Hi Bun-Y/n” he says shyly as he shuffles in to the room, his eyes roaming everywhere other than on her.
“Hi”
“H-how are you feeling?”
“You’re joking right?” She scoffs.
“I-I’m sorry about yesterday, I should of done something to stop Brock”
“But you didn’t and I was humiliated in front of the whole entire school.”
“I know. Y-you didn’t come to mine last night and when I found out that Sam and Steve was turned away by your mom I kind of gotten worried”
“You expected me to show up after none of you said anything to stop Brock? After you didn’t wait for me at lunch or how you and the boys went to Lloyds without me?”
Rubbing the back of his neck he shifted on the spot “well yeah, we’re friends Bu-Y/n”
“You can’t even say the name you gave me when you was seven. Why is that?”
“Dot doesn’t like it”
“Dot being your girlfriend?”
“Yeah…”
“Why didn’t you tell me that you had one?”
“Be-because I didn’t want you to get jealous”
“You thought I would get jealous?”
“Well yeah, you are aren’t you?”
“Give me a second, just wait there” she says as she stands up on shaky legs, moving around him she heads downstairs to the living room where her parents sat “momma, dada can I please swear? I won’t do it again I promise”
“Of course princess” Howard grins before Maria could say anything.
She runs back upstairs and walks around Bucky who still stands there. “Are you fucking out of your mind? You honestly thought I was jealous? I would have been happy for you!”
“Did you just ask your parents if you could swear?” Bucky grins finding it amusing.
“Don’t grin at me Ducky, I swear to God I will hit you!”
“You can’t call me that anymore Y/n, Dot hates it especially after you called it me yesterday”
“Fuck Dot! I’ve been your friend since I was six years old Ducky! You want me to be different with you now that you have a girlfriend?”
“Bunny-shit Y/n. Please just stop calling me it okay it’s embarrassing, we’re to old now to keep calling each other them silly nicknames”
“I-we-what? Duc-“
“Y/n.”
“Fine. James are you really going to be choosing her someone you’ve been dating for all of five minutes over me? Someone you’ve know for years?”
“Yes.”
“W-what?”
“I’m choosing her over you.”
“A-are we no longer friends?”
“Will you grow up and stop acting like a freak?” He says instantly slamming his mouth shut, regret seeping into his veins when he sees her the pain flash across her eyes.
“What did you just call me?”
“I-I didn’t mean it-“
“What did you just call me James”
“Bun-“
“I’m not going to fucking ask again James!”
“A freak” he gulps.
“Fuck you. Get the fuck out of my house and out of my fucking life!”
“Bun-“
“You’re not allowed to call me that anymore, remember? Your bitch of a girlfriend won’t like it oh and we’re not fucking friends anymore! Now leave!”
“Don’t call Dot a-“
“She’s a bitch. A big fat stinking bitch! And guess what James, so are you.”
“Brock’s right, you are a freak. A freak with no friends. And guess what Y/n, I never wanted to be your friend I just felt sorry for you. Your father beat you and killed your mother so of course I felt sorry for you, did you really think I wanted to be friends with you? News flash I didn’t!” He shouts, once he calmed down from his outburst he struggles to breathe “Y/n I’m-I’m sor-“
“I hate you. If you don’t leave right now I’ll get my dad up here, I’m not joking James. Get out I hate you so much I can’t believe I actually thought I loved you. Now fuck off.”
“I-I’m sorry”
“Shove your sorry up your arse and fuck right off bye bye”
She turns her back on him and waiting until she heard him leave, she had always thought that he became her friend because he felt sorry for her but she didn’t want to believe it, now she knew the truth she didn’t know what to do with herself.
Hearing the front door shut she burst out crying, she fell to her knees clutching her chest. She felt her heart had been ripped out of her chest and stomped on a million times.
“Oh my sweet baby, it’s okay I’ve got you” Maria hold her daughter as she breaks down.
“M-Momma it hurts”
“I know it does sweetheart. Let it all out baby”
“I-I don’t want to be here anymore momma”
“What do you mean?”
“I want to go to a private school like you and dada said befo-before I went to school with them”
Maria looks over at Howard who stands at the doorway with his jaw clenched so tightly that Maria thought he was going to shatter his teeth.
“Are you sure angel?”
“Yes I’m sure dada, please I won’t ask for anything else ever again!”
“I’ll set it up angel”
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Bucky had no idea that when he woke up that morning that he was going to lose his best friend but he only had himself to blame.
He had lost the most important person in his life all because he fucked up.
He had said the most vilest things to her which was not in any way true.
He had lost his Bunny.
<Previous   Next>
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your-eternal-lies · 2 days
Text
Love is a Choice (chapter four)
Main Navigation || Bucky Barnes Masterlist
“Love is a Choice” Masterlist
Pairing — Bucky Barnes x Agent f!Reader Series Summary — In your experience, relationships only bring drama and heartbreak, and you want absolutely none of it. That is, until an act of sheer recklessness brings Bucky Barnes back into your life.
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Warnings — Just more angst, more flashbacks to Reader’s time with the KGB/Hydra, oh, and did I forget angst? There’s a shit ton of that, if it wasn’t clear.
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Love is a Choice
Chapter Four
It’s said that as long as you could still feel the cold, it meant you would live yet another day. 
So, when you first saw him, you thought he was the grim reaper. 
Standing in a darkened corner of your cell, his silhouette was apparent even in the shadows. You almost breathed a sigh of relief, despite the pain, thinking that the sweet respite of death had finally come to claim you. As you laid there on your side, momentarily abandoned in your cell, still sore and bleeding, all you could feel was warmth. 
Maybe he would make your death quick and painless, you thought. When he stepped into the light, he moved so slowly and quietly, you couldn’t even hear his heavy boots on the frozen concrete. He couldn’t have been human, you thought. There was simply no way. 
The dim moonlight illuminated the reaper’s face, revealing to you long shoulder-length brown hair and bright blue eyes, ones that looked impossibly sad. Almost like he had seen too many things that he could never quite say, especially not from behind the mask that covered the rest of his face. 
Regardless, it was like you could hear them. 
Your eyes watered, despite yourself, because you think he can hear them too, echoing in waves straight out of your weary heart. It had been a very difficult life, indeed, but you thought it was a worthy death. Natasha’s secrets, the very little that you knew, would die with you. Your sister would be free. Now, it was time for a long and peaceful rest. Didn’t you at least deserve that much? 
But he always stood there, unmoving and silent, as if simply waiting for you to die. You didn’t mind; it was so much better than dying alone, after all.
And it seemed like even Death had a heart, because one day, and you don’t know when it started, his cold indifference melted away into something you hadn’t seen in a while. The last time you saw it, you found them in the emerald green eyes of Natasha Romanoff. 
Understanding. Regret. Maybe even compassion. 
While your captors tried to pull your most precious secrets out of you, the reaper would avert his gaze, his shoulders stiff, his one good hand balling up into a fist at his side. His nails bit into the palms of his hands, drawing blood of his own, droplets of red drip, drip, dripping onto the concrete. 
And whenever you weren’t being watched, you were being held with a pair of conflicted hands that seemed to sew you back together at the seams. Your lungs would deflate slowly, the air you’d been holding hostage released in a quivering sigh. It would disperse into the room, mingling with the faint scent of gunmetal and leather that clung onto your only companion like an old war medal—a constant reminder of battles fought, of lives irreparably altered. 
The stifling cloak of isolation would lift, unravelling thread by painstaking thread as you allowed yourself to acknowledge the simple truth reflected in the stranger’s gaze: you were not alone in your suffering. 
A silent communion began to form, its foundation built on the remnants of shattered lives and unspeakable pain, daring to be pieced together once more. Your eyes would meet and there was, despite yourselves, a glimmer there, shining through the dampness of unshed tears—a flicker of hope that danced like a fragile flame. 
His palm against yours became an anchor in the cold stillness, his touch a whisper of solidarity that spoke volumes more than words ever could. 
But you knew better than anyone what cruelty Hydra and the KGB were capable of, and you realized with each passing moon, that this man was just like you. He was just as helpless, wanting desperately to break the cycle of despair, but unaware as to how or whether he even could. 
It was enough, however, to know that he wanted to save you. You wanted to save him, too. And nothing like that had ever happened before Natasha, or since. Despite your bleak reality in this underground cell, you could still recognize specialness whenever you saw it. 
Especially when he removed his mask for you, guided your icy fingers to the rugged lines of his face. The stubble along his jaw seemed darker against his pallid skin, the weight of his past evident in the weary tilt of his head. 
He never spoke, your reaper. Words weren’t needed here, not when he looked at you like that, not when you knew how he punished himself for being so powerless in the face of your misery. 
And certainly not when he made a sacrifice that wrecked your heart. You woke to rumbling walls and falling dust, the sounds of distant explosions and gunfire, before you heard her. 
“Wake up now, kroshka,” her gentle hands were on your face, a gasp of a sob escaping her lips when your eyes met. “There you are, little sister. I’m here, I’m sorry it took so long.” 
But you wanted to scream in agony, wanted to demand to know why she would do something so reckless as coming back. You wanted to beg her to go before the guards came back, but no sounds came out when you opened your mouth. Your throat was dry and hoarse, your arms too weak to fight her off as she picked you up in her arms. 
“It’s going to be okay now. I’m going to take you home.” How could someone so slight be so strong, you always wondered. But your eyes began to close again, your body unable to resist the warmth of hers. And despite how much you wished she would leave you behind and save herself, you were secretly overjoyed to see her. 
But it was only when you were halfway out of the cell that you remembered. Your eyes snapped open, your reaper watching silently from the shadows as you went. He nodded, as if telling you it was okay to go, but you grabbed desperately at Natasha’s arm. 
You tried to croak her name, to tell her that there was someone else here who needed saving. But all you could do was open your mouth in a rasping scream, and Natasha mistook your cries as ones of anger directed at her. 
You reached out behind her, heart sinking as your reaper soundlessly stepped between you and the swarming guards just as Natasha rounded a corner. Silent sobs wracked your body, tears dripping down your temples and onto Natasha’s shirt, knowing that if the roles had been reversed, your handlers would have killed you for such a thing. 
The last thought before you passed out were of him, of eyes so blue they reminded you of clear summer skies and crystal ocean waters. 
And when you opened your eyes again, finding yourself in an unfamiliar hospital room, you thought he was long dead. You mourned him as Natasha introduced you to her friends. You thought of him often as you began a new life, telling yourself you’d honour his memory and sacrifice. 
But when Steve handed you a file one day, crinkled all around the edges and stamped with fading Russian letters, all the breath was stolen from your lungs when you flipped it open. 
You thought you would die right then and there. 
The devastating details of Steve’s childhood friend, one James Buchanan Barnes, were all there, transcribed onto two letter-sized pages of black and white. You stared hard at a series of old photographs, of a young handsome sergeant who still smiled, of the Winter Soldier, frozen in time inside a cryogenic chamber. 
And after all those years of bloodshed, after a literal lifetime of agony, smoke, carbon, and flame, as the two of you finally stood in the same room again, only one of you remembered. 
In fact, he looked right through you, as if you never existed at all. And while you knew full well that it wasn’t his fault that he couldn’t remember, you couldn’t help the wave of resentment that washed over you, nor the immediate surge of regret that would follow. 
He looked like a frightened child standing in that room, eyes wide and mouth slightly parted as if he might scream, and you could no longer will yourself to be angry. 
This man had saved your life, even though he had been given every possible reason not to. You resolved right then to never tell anyone, that the truth would die with you one day. Bucky would never have to know that you had met before; it was your way of atoning, of thanking him for a gesture that had meant everything to you but now meant nothing to him. 
The Soldier who had offered you a tiny morsel of affection and sympathy in a place that normally held none was no longer there. The look in his eyes were blank, compared to the raw, aching thing in your chest that had been shaped by his absence, by what you thought was his death. 
Despite the longing, the undeniable pull despite the chasm of history and time that lay between you, Bucky had felt nothing for you in that moment. 
But still. 
Still, you fell. 
Because it was impossible to know who Bucky Barnes was—for real—underneath all that trauma, and not love him. 
He had a crippling sense of humour. His comedic timing was brilliant, if you were being honest. Always prepared with the best quips, paired with just the right amount of sarcasm, complete with a hint of a smirk that hinted at the mischievous boy he used to be. 
He painted in secret. He never told anybody, but every so often you could smell the scent of acrylics lingering on his clothes. You liked to imagine him in his room, mixing colours on a palette, painting whatever came to mind. 
Sunny yellows, peach pinks, and creamy oranges for sunsets. Soft lavenders, mint greens, and deep crimsons for the most delicate flowers. 
Sky blues, for the shade you’ve always believed his heart to be. 
He liked to read. And what you particularly loved about Bucky is that he was indiscriminate when it came to choosing his reading material. You found notes scrawled in the margins of books that he’d leave all over the compound, on the pages of romance novels, science fictions, fantasies, and thrillers. 
A lot of the time, the notes weren’t even comprehensive. You would smile to yourself when you found a simple exclamation mark next to a passage in Frankenstein, or a heart hastily scrawled beside a particularly breathtaking paragraph in The Song of Achilles.
He tried to pretend like he didn’t, but Bucky cared. You could see it in the way he smiled at Steve, in the way he awkwardly but warmly patted Wanda on the shoulder on her bad days, in the way he put up with Clint and Sam’s good-natured teasing, and even in the way he could never quite look Tony in the eye. 
He cared with his whole being, this man. And it was why you couldn’t tell him. Eventually, he had come to care about you too. He would gaze at you a little too long, as if he could recognize, not you, but the sorrow permanently etched into the tired lines of your face. 
He started standing a little closer to you, in elevators, meetings, in the quinjet just before your next mission. His eyes started scanning rooms and hallways whenever he entered, letting out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding until they landed on you. 
He started calling you by your name. Something told you that was particularly important to him. With each time your name left his lips, emotion crept under your skin, with one in particular threatening to breathe new life back into your weary lungs. 
But there was a very real problem. The further you fell, the more he broke your heart. How could someone be your life-saving solace and the source of your heartache all in one fell swoop? 
And the worst part wasn’t that he had ultimately left without even a word of warning, not even a note hastily scrawled before his departure. It wasn’t the familiar pang of hurt when it occurred to you that Bucky didn’t feel even an ounce of what you did, or that you weren’t high enough on his list of priorities to even think about telling you himself, or that you had to find out about his plans through someone else. 
No—the worst part was, while the Winter Soldier had saved your life, Bucky Barnes made you want to live. As far as you were concerned, that was his biggest and only sin. 
So, you pull away from his hands, one warm and one cold against your back, the ones that make you feel things you thought you put aside a long time ago. Hands that could turn back time, make it feel like you’d never been hurt in the first place. Ones that could piece your heart back together if you would just let them. 
These are the hands that you could belong to, if only you could be brave enough to run towards him instead of away. 
But you aren’t. 
“How long was I out?” The air in the room shifts as you shift back on the bed, angling your body away from him and pulling the quilt back up to your neck, creating a chasm in the room that feels like miles. 
“Almost a full day,” he replies, sitting statue-like, a figure carved out of remorse and rugged edges softened only by the firelight. His jaw tightens, a muscle twitching as you try not to make eye contact, each passing second of silence landing like a hammer to your heart. 
You always told yourself that you could live without his love, you never dreamed of having that. But the one thing you can’t live without is his happiness. 
You’ve gotten used to the pain and the hurt, but it was time for him to put all of that in the past. You don’t even want to think about the devastated look he’d give you if he ever found out about the past you share, that you were the only one still cursed to remember. 
And while it hurt to see him leave, you knew how suffocating New York had become for him. The pursuit of his peace of mind took priority, and you knew it was the hardest thing he’d ever done. Saying goodbye to Steve, leaving behind the place that used to be home, and turning his back on an ever persistent sense of duty. 
You know that if he knew, he would have stayed. But that wouldn’t have been right. You weren’t, still aren’t, a person strong enough to stand at his side, not when you yourself are falling apart. 
Bucky lifts his hand, a hesitant gesture, into the tension-filled air. Every instinct tells you to bridge the gap, to erase the cool expanse of sheets and distance with the warmth of your touch. Because he’s here now. He’s here, breathing, and real, and you want to hold him and never let go. 
“Please,” you hear him say, his voice breaking at the last second. You lift your head, his eyes meeting yours like a tumultuous sea meeting an immovable cliffside as you fight to keep your own gaze neutral. You find the weight of a hundred things unspoken in the beautiful lines of his face. “I can’t change the past, but I’m here now. Darlin’, if you’ll let me, I’m here.” 
You clutch the quilt closer to your chest, wanting to both hide behind it and throw it off you, to pull him close and feel him against your skin. But once bitten, twice shy, you hesitate to say or do anyhing. His hand descends slowly, but not onto your shoulder or your hand, but back onto the cold sheets. 
“Back then,” he continues, voice a gravelly whisper, “I wasn’t myself… not really. The Winter Soldier… well, you’ve read my file. He did things. Things I can’t ever forget.” 
His eyes meet yours, dark pools reflecting the torment of countless sleepless nights. Your chest tightens, recognizing the ocean of sorrow that thunders inside him, the one that is reflected back at you whenever you look in the mirror. 
“But here…” he trails off, as if not quite knowing how to explain. But you already know; nightmares like your very own, fragmented and splintered, must follow him like ghosts. And right on cue, his cat hops off the headboard where she’d been lazily lounging, laying down on the bed across his metal arm. 
Here, he isn’t unbearably lonely or painfully out of place. Here, there are no expectations, no pressure, of what’s normal and how to get back there. Here, he could just finally be. 
Despite yourself, the hardened ice around your heart softens into a gentle stream. Bucky does indeed look healthier now, his skin no longer waxy and almost grey from a chronic lack of sleep. His eyes are no longer sunken and hollow, but clear and bright despite the dreary northern climate. 
Nothing else matters now except for protecting the peace that he’s found here. You will do anything to keep it. 
You take his hand. 
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A few hours later, after a short nap, Bucky lends you some clean clothes and feeds you some warm broth before redressing your wounds. You watch him as he goes back to his baking, which had been interrupted yesterday with your unexpected arrival. 
He hunches over his task, shoulders broad and imposing even in repose, the room lit by the soft glow of a single oil lamp. A five o’clock shadow darkens his jaw, lending him an air of ruggedness that belies the careful attention he gives to his pastries and doughs. 
Across the room, you inspect the cuts on your forearms, your movements deliberate as you dab at a particularly nasty one with a cloth. Bucky’s stitch work is impeccable, but there wasn’t much he could do about the pain as you try not to wince with each touch of the cloth. 
“Careful,” Bucky’s voice is quiet, almost lost in the cabin’s stillness. “That one looks deep.” 
“I’ve had worse,” you tell him, your tone a lot less clipped than it was earlier. Bucky offers a half-smile that doesn’t quite reach his eyes. Alpine diffuses the tension with a soft meow, as if begging for attention. Bucky lifts both his hands with a rueful smile, they’re both covered in flour, so she hops off the countertops and hobbles over to you. 
You pat at her back awkwardly, but enjoying the softness of her fur between your fingers. The corners of your lips are pulled up by some invisible force as she bares her belly to you, something you can only describe as joy. 
But the fragile peace is shattered like glass as the sounds of the first gunshot splits the air. The sound is distant, but also unmistakably close, reverberating through the trees. You freeze, your fingers flat on Alpine’s stomach, her paws curled around your hand. 
Then, there’s another. And another. 
Bucky’s head snaps towards the window, loaf of unbaked bread forgotten, as a bloom of orange fire paints the night sky. Your free hand instinctively goes to your side, seeking a weapon that isn’t there. You let out a quiet curse before you look towards Bucky, your eyes meeting in alarm. 
“Hydra,” you murmur, the name a curse on your lips, a reminder of a past that just refuses to die and stay buried. 
“What? But Steve went to the base, said he took down every single one of them there.” 
You curse again, running a frustrated hand through your hair. “Some of them must have followed me here. Maybe even called for reinforcements on the way, who knows.” 
“Shit,” he says as your gazes hold for a brief second, sharing a wordless understanding. There is time for pain, for grief, and for the tender blooming of something new later. But not now. Now, there is only survival. 
In the next breath, the cabin is a flurry of movement. You pick Alpine up just as the world outside the safe house erupts into a frenzy, but within its walls, time seems to slow as your instincts take over. 
With a swift motion, Bucky grabs the radio and barks into it. “Steve, we need an ETA. Our location is compromised; Hydra agents have got us surrounded.” 
“Damn it!” Steve’s voice rasps over the comms. “Hang tight, we’re only about twenty minutes out. The storm is starting to clear, but not fast enough—” 
“Just get here fast!” Bucky doesn’t have time to say more, dropping the microphone and heading over to a hidden loose floorboard in the corner of the living room, pulling out a rifle and a box of ammunition. 
“Kitchen counter, now,” he orders, voice low but piercing, eyes scanning for any sign of movement through the dirt-streaked window. Your response is immediate, knowing that you’re of no help to him with the extent of your injuries, but he still slides a loaded pistol across the floors in your direction. 
You grab it, folding your body behind the makeshift barrier with practiced ease, but your heart thumps harder and faster against your ribcage at the sinister drumbeat of boots on the forest floor outside. 
“Bucky,” you whisper, pulse racing. The sounds are close—too close, too loud, too many. Much like you were back at their base, there are too many of them and not enough of you. “We’re outnumbered.” 
The way his brows knit together tells you he knows you’re right. The two of you alone can’t hope to fight your way out of this. You have twenty minutes before the team arrives, but who knows if you even have that long. 
Bucky shoulders his rifle, quickly crossing the living room and pulling you out from underneath the counter. Instead, in one of the back bedrooms, he pulls aside the four-poster bed and the ornate rug underneath it, revealing a hidden trap door.
“Get in,” he orders after yanking it open, and with Alpine still cradled in your arms, you carefully lower yourself into the crawlspace. “Got your gun?”
“Yeah, right here,” you tell him. Bucky then tosses a blanket down after you, a welcome respite against the dank and musty interior. You wrap it around yourself before pushing yourself into the corner, careful not to pull too much at your stitches, making as much space for him as you can. 
But your heart drops when you realize he’s not moving, one hand braced against the door. “What are you doing?” 
He looks down at you, swallowing hard, his Adam’s apple bobbing up and down nervously. “I need to buy us some time until Steve gets here.” 
“No,” you growl, letting Alpine drop out of your arms and onto the floor. You reach out to grasp his arm, the movement tugging at your stitches painfully, but you wrap your fingers around his wrist the best you can and pull hard. He doesn’t even budge. “Get your ass in here, Barnes.” 
“Yeah, and who will move the bed back? They’ll find us in seconds—” 
“You’re not going out there alone. There’s too many of them!” You hiss, trying your best not to shout. 
“We don’t have enough bullets between the two of us.”
“I don’t fucking care!”
“Darlin’—” 
“Don’t darlin’ me. You are not going.” Your voice cracks, tears suddenly blur your vision, surprising you that you’ve still got any left. “You can’t.” 
“Come on, I’m a super soldier,” he tries to grin, tries to lighten the mood with a joke that just falls flat. “I’ll be fine. Piece of cake.” 
“Please,” and for the first time in a long time, you are terrified. Fear grips your throat, seeps into your lungs, and every breath you manage to draw feels ice cold. “Steve will be here so soon.” 
“We’re out of time, doll.” He says, like it isn’t the most devastating thing he could possibly tell you at this moment. But he proves you wrong once again, in a single instant breaking down every single wall you’ve ever built around the pieces of your soul, brick by perfidious brick: “I love you.” 
You blink, wondering if you’ve heard him wrong. Are you filling in the gaps with your own wishful thinking? 
“I love you,” he repeats, brushing some of your hair out of your face. His forehead touches yours, his hand cradling the curve of your jaw. 
“No, you don’t. You’re just saying that to get me to shut up.” You bite back, not wanting to hear it. Not like this. The man just chuckles, like he’s talking to a pouting child, as if he knows your bark is worse than your bite. 
“Listen… I need you to know, leaving New York wasn’t about not wanting to be with you. It was about being someone worthy of standing next to you.” 
“You’ve always been—” 
“So, what kind of man would I be, sweetheart,” he smiles again, but it doesn’t quite reach his eyes, where tears brim at the edge of his lashes. “If I didn’t do everything I could to keep you alive?” 
“No, you can’t.” You beg, because despite his earlier claims that he’d be fine, it sounds like he’s saying goodbye. You don’t know if you can handle another one of those. 
“I don’t know why he did what he did. Galloway, I mean, and I’m definitely not sorry that he’s dead… but he did one thing right: he kept you alive out there. He kept you alive long enough for me to meet you.” He lets out this breathless laugh, brushing away some of your tears, mixed with some of his own. “Can’t let a Hydra agent outdo me, can I?” 
“Don’t do this to me,” Not again, not again, not again.“Stay!” 
“I love you,” he says again in response, accentuating each word with a kiss to each cheek, and then one firmly on your lips. He pulls away, eyes searching yours for another few beats of silence, as if he’s committing your face to memory. “Sometimes, I get the strangest feeling that I have for a really long time.” 
Then he pushes your hand away, closing the trap door on top of you with a dreadful thud. You hear the latch being flipped shut, the furniture being moved back to its usual spot, hiding your existence away from the world and all impending danger. 
You scream, but your cries get muffled against the floorboards, under a hailstorm of bullets, and the dreaded clashing of metal against metal. 
Bucky Barnes is a terrible man. 
One who repeats history. 
One who always tries to repent for sins that aren’t his. 
And worst of all, one who may never know that you love him too.
« Chapter 3 || Chapter 5 »
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Taglist — @cjand10 @pbs-theundeadmaggot @nerdreader Please leave a comment or send me a DM if you’d like to be added to the taglist for this story. Note that if you ask and you are a blank blog, I will block you instead.
Notes — Okay, so events are moving pretty quickly, but I did say I didn’t wanna drag this out for too long lmao, and it was always intended to have only five chapters. The last chapter is coming soon! I'm hoping to have the finale posted on Friday.
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29 notes · View notes
angrythingstarlight · 2 months
Note
Picturing Bunica + Tataie scolding Bucky + Malyshka whenever they see Bee doesn’t have mittens or socks
Even a mafia boss has to answer to his grandparents.
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Pairing: Mafia!Bucky x Reader, daughter nicknamed Bumblebee
A/N: Part of the Bumblebee Series.
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Bucky is a six foot five Pakhan, he towers over nearly everyone. A natural fighter and an expert marksman. He runs his empire with an iron fist. He can't remember the last time his knuckles weren't bruised. People fear him. Respect him. He only repeats himself once.
Not many things in this world scare him.
Even fewer people intimidate him.
In fact, he can't think of anyone who makes him think twice about anything.
Except Bunica. The diminutive matriarch is the exception. Everyone knows not to cross her.
Or to do anything that put her little great-granddaughter's well-being or comfort at risk.
And she's currently strolling down her front steps to greet Bumblebee. The same Bumblebee who tore off her socks somewhere between the airport and the drive to her house.
"Shit. Where did they go?" Bucky grouses, sweeping his hand under her car seat.
"I should have an extra pair in here," you mutter distractedly, rummaging through the diaper bag. "Where are they? I know I put—," you drop the teething ring and groan.
Bucky peers out the tinted window, Bunica is standing on the last step, hands on her hips, her flour-dusted apron fluttering around her. Undoubtedly wondering why no one's coming out of the car. "You find them?"
"Bucky." The plaintive tilt to your voice snags his attention. His blue eyes meets yours, his smile slowly falters. "I used the back up pair yesterday."
She waited until you were crossing the street to rip them off and set them free on Fifth Avenue.
You both glance over to see Bee smiling, her bare foot in her hand. Her teddy bear jumper and light pink sweater is one of her cutest outfits and it would be even cuter if she still had the matching socks on.
It's not going to matter to Bunica that your feisty, stubborn baby refuses to leave them on. Or that you've gone through an entire stash in less than a month trying to keep her covered and warm.
That's the moment you decide to buy the now infamous bear one-piece outfits.
The interior of the Maserati fills with a heavy silence. He drops his head, blowing a harsh breath through his lips. "She's going to kill us."
"Yep."
"Maybe we could—"
"She's not going let us leave with Bee."
"Okay. Let's—"
"The luggage is already inside."
"What if we—"
"You really think you can stop her?"
Bucky slumps in the seat next to Bumblebee and takes her chubby leg out of her grasp, shaking it gently in the air. "Why would you do this to us? We talked about this."
His stern glare melts away when she babbles, patting his hand.
A sharp knock rattles the window. Without a word, Bucky unbuckles her car seat while you reach over and hit the unlock button. You slide over the warm leather seat and, without an ounce of shame, hide behind Bucky.
The door swings open and a rush of cool air followed by the smell of sweet cinnamon and apple wafts in.
"Where is my little Bumblebee?" Bunica bends down, her soft hazel eyes coast over you, stopping on Bee's bare feet. Her gaze narrows, sharpening the longer she stares. Bucky tries to speak but she halts his explanation with a raised finger. "I will deal with you two later."
Bucky sighs, already envisioning the lecture he's about to endure.
"Oh my poor baby. Look at you. Do they want you to catch cold hmm?" Bee is out her seat and bundled up in her arms. Bunica shuts the door with her hip and marches back to the house. "They want you to freeze? Did they even feed you?"
The adorable traitor grins, responding with a string of nonsensical chatter. You and Bucky get out of the car, his tattooed fingers intertwined with yours as you follow her up the stairs. "She's going to lock us out isn't she?"
"Most likely. Don't worry, I have a spare key." He can also break in if he wanted but he keeps that tidbit to himself.
Bunica abruptly stops, one foot over the threshold. More of that decadent cinnamon scent drifts out the front doorway, you can hear faint music from the kitchen.
She's been preparing for your arrival all week. You have no idea how happy she is to have the three of you back in her home.
That doesn't mean she'll let you get away with letting her poor Bumblebee freeze.
Her brow arches and she lifts her chin, looking down at her beloved grandson. Her stance is reminiscent of her earlier days when she helped her husband run the bravta. "I'm not going to do that James. I am going to inform Tataie about this incident."
The former pakhan is worse than she is when it comes to the baby. This is not good.
"Maybe we could—"
Bucky presses a kiss to the crown of your head. "We'd never make it past the gate."
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