#Because skinny jeans aren't in anymore

[btsgotjams27]

busted | jjk

Your husband comes home with a new gift and you’re not happy with it.

✨ title: busted | ✨ pairing: biker!jungkook x f!reader ✨ word count: 851 | ✨ rating: m/18+, minors dni ✨ genre/au: fluff, light smut (?) | parents, married ✨ warnings: language, jungkook is having a quarter-life crisis, mentions deceased parent (jungkook’s), they have two small children, jokes about cheating, kissing, groping, fingering, breeding kink(?), reader is turned on by jungkook’s outfit, allusions to sex ✨ a/n: i can't believe jungkook is giving us writers such good content. ily bby. i apologize to @bngtnbrat & @gguksflowers b/c i didn't give you what you actually wanted LOL. i got lazy and didn't want to write smut. don't hate me.

"And where did you come from?" you asked, eyeing your husband from head to toe. "And what are you wearing?"

Jungkook jumped back, doe eyes widened, clutching his chest when you turned on the entryway light. "Holy shit, babe–you scared me." He was dressed in black, not unusual for him - but it wasn't his everyday outfit. He donned a moto-style canvas jacket, skinny jeans, and boots.

You stood there with a deadpan expression, arms crossed, waiting for him to answer. You wanted to see how he'd get out of this one.

He looked at his outfit, confused about why you were fussing over it. He was trying to play it cool and keep his seventeen thousand dollar Harley Davidson purchase a secret. "Why aren't you asleep?" He deflected, evading your questions, and he would never hear the end of it now.

You took a step closer to him, squinting at the orange letters etched in his jacket. "Why does it say Harley Davidson on there?" You already knew what Jungkook was up to, but you needed him to verbalize it.

The low rumbling of a motorcycle could be heard from outside when you checked in on your baby boys. Wondering who the hell bought a bike in your neighborhood. Was it your obnoxious neighbor, Taehyung? Did he finally bite the bullet and make the purchase?

When you peeked through the blinds, a person on an all-black motorcycle was sitting in your driveway. Someone must be at the wrong house, you thought. They pulled off the matte black helmet, lightly ruffling their long, dark, wavy locks - revealing it was not a random stranger but your husband. 

Jungkook gently pushed himself off the bike and glanced at the darkened house in front of him. You quickly stepped away from the window, hoping he didn't see you. Your eyes fluttered shut for a moment, and a deep sigh escaped. You told yourself that you wouldn't blow up on him.

Jungkook shrugged. "Just a jacket I bought," he said casually, brushing past you and setting down his backpack.

"Huh--" You turned to him. "Where's your helmet?"

Busted.

He stopped dead in his tracks, beating himself up because you caught him red-handed. Jungkook slowly turned to face you, guilt written all over his face. He knew he couldn't lie anymore. Scratching his temple while dodging your gaze, he muttered, "It's hidden in the bushes."

Taehyung left for the weekend and forgot to give Jungkook the code to his garage. That's where he's been storing his new purchase.

When the two of you started dating, he expressed that owning a motorcycle was a dream of his, but with getting married and having two small children under the age of five - it became a pipe dream. A van was more plausible, not a motorcycle. So Jungkook never brought it up again until his mother passed away. Then there was endless talk about buying his dream bike because life was too short to not buy things that made you happy.

It's not that you didn't want him to have one, you wanted him to have everything he could ever want, but again, the two of you were responsible for little humans now.

"Is that why you've been going out late at night? To ride your bike? Thought you were cheating on me." You were relieved when you discovered it was a bike, not another woman.

He lightly chuckled, holding his arms out for you, bringing you flush against his chest. "I could never cheat on you, baby. You're the only one I want, the only one I'd want to carry my babies," he grinned, peering down at you.

"Kook–don't," you whined when he groped your fleshy cheeks under your oversized shirt. "The kids are sleeping." He was shameless, really, and wanted to fuck you anytime, anywhere.

Was this his way of apologizing for the bike? Fucking you into oblivion?

He connected his mouth to yours, letting his warm tongue find yours. He smiled when he pulled away, causing you to whimper. "Then you gotta be quiet, don't you?"

You broke away from his embrace, playfully hitting him in the chest. "We need to talk about this, you know?" you grumbled. "You're not gonna get away with this."

He chuckled, leaning in and trailing kisses across your jaw, tugging you closer into his frame. "Not gonna get away with what? My bike or you?"

You mewled when his hand found its way into your underwear, lightly touching your already sensitive bud. "Your... bike," you stuttered, eyes fluttering shut at his touch. Jungkook's never been shy regarding affection; he'd always give you hugs and kisses, even with the kids around.

"Can we talk about it later?" he asked, giving open-mouth kisses along your neck, gripping your waist, pressing you against his hardened length.

You had to admit, you liked him in this outfit. Who knew you'd be so turned on by a stupid motorcycle jacket and skinny jeans? God--you're easy.

Jungkook started removing his jacket, but your hands stopped him. "This--stays on." He flashed a shit-eating grin. "Everything stays on."

✨ next ~ busted again

#jungkook fanfic #jungkook fic #jungkook drabble #biker jungkook #bts fanfic #bts fic #jungkook x you #jungkook x reader #jungkook smut #jungkook scenario #jungkook imagine #jungkook #jeon jungkook #bts jungkook #jungkook fluff #jungkook x y/n

[corvid-language-library]

What kind of stuff do you wear to work? Is there a dress code or anything? I just wondered what the teachers wear during the grades where the students don’t have uniforms.

Hi there!

So firstly, I work at an eikaiwa rather than a school and so none of the kids wear uniforms. The junior high students often wear their PE kit, but other than that I never see any kind of uniforms.

As for me:

I wear a polo shirt with my company's logo. The company provides one free when you join and then we have the opportunity to buy more throughout the year in various colours (I have orange, blue and baby blue).

If, for whatever reason, we don't have a company polo, then any collared shirt is fine. The most important thing is that it's long enough to not ride up and show any skin if you reach up or bend over.

During the winter months I wear a long-sleeve top underneath to (a) keep me warm and (b) hide my tattoos. During the summer I have UV protection sleeves I wear over my arms to hide the tattoos. If you don't have tattoos then you don't have to wear the extras.

Trousers we're basically allowed to wear any kind of jeans/cargos/anything casual providing they're not skin-tight (no skinny jeans, no leggings) or unprofessional.

No skirts (because kids might look up them and see something they're not supposed to), no sweatpants (too unprofessional, plus a kid might just pull them down), no shorts above the knee and nothing with wide flare (because we might trip, or again, kids might look up them).

The only exception to the no tights/leggings rule is if you have leg tattoos, in which case you can wear them underneath shorts that reach below the knee during summer

No shoes in the classroom because it's Japan, but we have to wear socks (obviously nothing with holes in them, but other than that go nuts). If we have to leave the classroom (eg to take a kid to the bathroom) during the lesson then we wear the hideous company-provided plastic slippers

We're not technically allowed to wear jackets or cardigans or anything over our polo shirt, but that rule was made by some office-dweller south of Tokyo. Here in Tohoku we sometimes stick on a cardi or a hoody over our polo shirt, especially when we're taking the kids out to their parents and there's an actual snowstorm. But it does still have to be the kind of jacket/cardi/hoody that opens (not a pullover), so our polo should always be visible

Only minimal/natural makeup is allowed, and we're also asked to not wear perfume (Japanese people don't typically wear perfume). Piercings asides from ear lobes are also forbidden. Also just generally no accessories (the UV sleeves are allowed because they're plain), no caps or hats (religious headwear is fine but I think it has to be plain).

Long hair must be tied back (no restrictions as long as it looks neat and is out of our faces). Additionally, hair colour must be something natural (you can dye it but only like, brown or blonde or black or ginger. No bright green buzzcuts)

Masks aren't enforced anymore but everyone wears one anyway

Thanks for the question! Feel free to ask about anything else you're curious about 😊

#what does the jay say #jackdaw in japan #treepie teacher time

[sleepy-achilles]

I’m literally crying! Poor Leon😭

I wonder how Leon’s gonna fight off Ministry🔥

Leon's Nightmare Part 6- Roses

You know, the normal tw of violence and dead people. I'm sorry I'm shit at tagging but..hey, can't win it all.

More importantly, this info is important, Matthew Gomez looks like Henry Cavil and Valentina Addams looks like Jessica Alba. (Yk Leon's childhood friends. I haven't got face claims for cassies friends but yk..they aren't mentioned here so it doesn't matter. She also has more than Leon. Shock)

------------------------------------------------------------------

Leon opens his eyes at the sudden weight on his hips. "I can't believe all it took was a cowboy pick up line to get me here" drew huffs above him. Leon glances up at the man in his boxers. Leon himself only in his black skinny jeans and a cowboy hat. Leon can't bring himself to say anything as he rubs his hands up and down drews thighs. "God, does that work on everyone? Save a horse, ride a cowboy? With a lil hat tilt?" Drew smiles flicking his hat. Leon smiles. "Only the pretty ones" the words come out of Leon's mouth without hesitation. Drew flushes slightly. "Guess we better see if its worth it then" drew hums popping Leon's trouser button.

Leon tenses. Drew glances at his face, takes in how his eyes have gone from loving and lust to something dark..something scared. "Lee...we don't have to-" "no. I just...you and the whole world have seen the top half of me but..I.. I wear joggers and tights in the ring for a reason" Leon admits quietly. Drew frowns slightly. Yeah Leon wasn't perfect but in drews eyes? That made him perfect. His upper body was littered with scars. Some from wrestling and others, like his face, from gods know were. Leon didn't say, people didn't ask. "Like I said..we can stop. Get a pizza-" "no. No. I just wanted to warn you." Leon states. "Go on." He nods.

As drew works on his jeans, Leon keeps his eyes on drews body. Something is wrong. Something is missing. That small nagging voice isn't here. He runs his hand up the bigger man's stomach. Yeah, drew was bigger, but he was soft. Perfect. Leon? Leon was small, lean, sharp. Sharp. Yeah, he was sharp whilst drew had some softness to him. He finally looks down when a hand touches his inner thigh, directly on a old burn. "Dre-" "Your still beautiful to me." Drew whispers. Leon's eyes widen.

That voice isn't there.

"Somethings wrong" Leon mutters sitting up. "Your still beautiful to me" drew repeats. Leon looks at him confused. "Drew?" He asks. "Your still beautiful to me" drew repeats again.

Leon closes his eyes and when he opens them again, he's not in his body anymore. His eyes widen as he stares at the bed. A younger him wearing a bright smile as a younger drew explains how beautiful he is.

"Im dead"

And with that the room disappears leaving Leon in a black space. "Oh god" he whispers turning around. "But this..this isnt hell" he mutters taking in the darkness. "And if this is heaven the religious lot are going to be very disappointed" Leon adds. "Tell me about it" a voice calls. Leon turns to see a familiar face. "...Athena?" Leon asks. "Thats grandma to you mister" athena tuts. Leon can't help but smile. He hasn't seen or heard her in so long. "Ministry really didn't want me near you" athena hums walking closer. "Why?" Leon asks. "How do you think skelly keeps you safe?" She smirks stopping infront of him. Leon smiles slightly. "Of course he cheats"

Athena chuckles as she takes in her grandson. "So...what happens now?" Leon asks looking around. "You need to think and think hard. Because it's not your time" athena tells him. "Is this purgatory?" Leon asks. "Who cares? Leon you need to find ministry and kill him." Athena signs. "Why? If I'm dead he's dead. He can't hurt anyone." Leon huffs. "Because it's not your time" athena snaps. "Who cares? Everyone will be better without me." Leon mutters. He winces as a hand clips the back of his head. "And this is our grandson? A quitter?" A deeper voice grunts.

Leon glances back. "Thomas" "Thats Grandpa to you sunny" Thomas warns. "You wanna see what's happening right now? Look. Take a close look" athena orders pushing him towards the side. Leon frowns but listens.

---

"Its been a day. You all need to calm down" Taker sighs. "No, we need to know what the fuck is going on" Kevin growls. "Yeah" hunter nods. "Why the hell did he light our boy on fire! Why is Leon dead and you lot are okay with it!" Kevin yells. "Because ministry was back and clinging to Leon. That's why. The only way to get rid of him was to kill him in Leon's body" Taker explains as drew shrinks back. "So what happens now?" Hunter asks. "Leon has to kill ministry's soul, spirit whatever that parasite is." Taker answers. "And if he doesn't?" Kevin asks.

Shawn hugs himself as Taker avoids looking at Kevin. Kevins jaw clenches. "Taker! You better start-" "Leon's gone forever. If Leon just gives up then he's gone. Never coming back, alright?" Taker snaps. The room falls silent. Drew glances up as Kevin suddenly throws his water bottle across the room and grabs Taker, slamming him against the wall. "Does he know this?" Kevin growls. "Couldn't exactly tell him the plan" Taker growls. "So my baby boy could be gone, forever, just like that?" Kevin asks. Shawns eyes widen as he looks at kevin. Taker frowns. "Kev.." "great. Grand. Just what we need. Another god damn death!" Kevin yells pushing away from the man and storming out. "Kev!" Shawn sighs running after him.

Drew can't help as his eyes widen and water. Taker glances at him. "You did the right thing. Do not doubt yourself or Leon." Taker tells him. Drew doesn't feel that way.

----

Leon frowns. "Scott's having the time of his life by the way" Thomas comments. Leon looks at him. "Can I see him?" Leon asks. "No, sorry kiddo. He's living it up on Scott Island in heaven." Thomas apologises. Leon huffs. "Who knew he'd pull a one way ticket to heaven?" Leon mutters stepping back. "They let pretty much anyone in. You'd be surprised." Athena shrugs. "But..he's happy right?" Leon asks. "Hes proud of you all, if that's what your wondering. He's got another year until he's allowed to do what we do. So prepare for that" Thomas admits.

Leon looks down at his wedding ring. The black band with drews name carved on the inside. "If you don't want to do it for yourself, do it for him" athena whispers.

Leon nods. "What do I do?" He asks. "You have to find him in a memory. You have to find him and kill him." Thomas explains. "Alright." Leon nods. "Try find one he's in a lot. I'm guessing he was in that first one" athena comments. Leon's face flushes, immediately grateful he figured it out before that night continued. "Um yeah..he's surprisingly homophobic for a man created from a..well demon who's married to a human man" Leon rubs his neck. "Its not him" athena hums. "Right...feeds off weakness..okay yes...I was the one homophobic...towards myself." Leon mutters. "Dont worry. Your father was the same aswell. And well just like you he still managed to fuck whoever. Same for your pa-" "Alright Alright please" Leon groans.

The pair chuckle and step back. "Just think really hard and it'll come to ya" Thomas states. Leon nods and closes his eyes.

The sound of waves hits his ears. A pair of breast presses against his back, sand under his legs.

Leon opens his eyes. The beach. "I wish mattie would hurry" valentina huffs from behind Leon. "I wish you'd stop putting sand in my hair" Leon frowns as he texts John about whatever. "You love it really" she purs against his ear. He rolls his eyes. "Still can't believe we convinced you to come with us" valentina comments leaning her head back. "My final year of being free before I'm vince mcmahons slave? Imma take it" Leon scoffs. He was finally breaking out from his father's shadow. A solo act. He couldn't wait.

"Which we must celebrate!" Mattie cheers as he falls onto Leon's legs. Leon groans at the weight. Mattie was like Drew. Bigger...safety. Mattie rolls onto his stomach, Leon forces his legs apart to allow the man in. "And the ice creams?" Valentina asks. "Oh I didnt get any" Mattie smiles. "Of course. Because why would you do the one thing we asked?" Leon snarks. He yelps as Mattie manages to push his swin shorts up and bite him on the inner thigh. He brings a foot up and knocks the man in the head as the other two laugh.

It doesn't come.

The teasing voice about his and matties weird relationship.

The laughing continues.

The bite throbs.

Leon closes his eyes as he pulled from his body. "Not with drew...not with mattie or val..." Leon mutters as he opens his eyes. He's shocked as he's stood in the middle of his parents home. He's stood infront of the grand staircase.

"Stay away from us!" His Pas voice echos through the house. Leon's eyes widen. "Hes here.." Leon looks down the hall leading to his father's office before he's running down it. The door opens before he even reaches it, his eyes immediately settling on the skeleton blade handle that would eventually go on to redefine him and his life.

A surge of power rushes through Leon as he grabs it. He examines the blade before taking a deep breathe. "Please...give me one last chance at life..." he whispers as his Pas sobbing picks up. "Now or never Lee.. " Leon mutters before rushing out.

The house begins to fade behind him as he runs upstairs and towards the master bedroom. He stops in the doorway at the sight. Pa clutching baby him close to his chest, John stood behind him against the wall, confused and scared.

Ministry. Ministry walking towards them holding his hands out.

"Stop" Leon growls. And the demon does. He chuckles deeply as he turns towards Leon, his head tilting. "Well well...if it isn't little Leon Michaels, all grown up" ministry smiles. "You know...teenage me always wanted a shot at killing my dad" Leon admits tightening his grip on the blade. "Yeah, I know" ministry smirks stepping closer. "Shame I'm not your dad" he adds. Leon glances at his scared pa. "This is where it all began, isn't it? When you first latched onto me like the parasite you are" Leon asks. Ministry smiles. "It is. Infact..its like a infinite loop. In 30 odd years that baby will be all grown up, stood right there doing this all over again. Your pa will know exactly what your fate is..but he won't tell a single soul" ministry chuckles.

"Oh..that's were your wrong. He will. Atleast this time he did" Leon states moving closer to ministry. "What?" Ministry asks caught off guard. He gasps as the blade is suddenly shoved into his chest.

"Leon....you can't fight him. You won't win. You never will. And it can't be any old knife it has to be the one." Shawn whispers as he massages Leon's shoulders. Leon tenses in his wheelchair. "What?" He asks quietly. "Straight through the heart. Don't even bother entertaining him. It'll be in your father's office. He hadn't put it on display yet." Shawn explains as he removes his hands. Leon turns to look at the man. "Pa?" He asks.

"The others used a normal blade, tried fighting you with hand by hand combat. Not me. I know better, all because of him" Leon whispers against the tallers ear. Ministry grabs him as he chokes and splutters on his own thick tar like blood. "Me and you? We are one in the same. And God I hate it. But I'm not running anymore. I'm not hiding from the darkness anymore. Not like you." Leon continues. "Im not afraid of death anymore." Leon growls as he tightens his hold on the blade. "But you are" Leon smirks as he pulls it up, causing the demon to cry in pain. "Dont keep the devil waiting, old friend" Leon growls as he pulls the blade out and stabs it straight into the mans forehead, right between the eyes.

"You? You have to feed into his fear of death. He doesn't want to die and neither do you." Shawn tells him. "I don't care about dying. You know that" Leon huffs. Shawn kneels infront of him. "You are scared. Terrified. You don't want to die. And you need your dad's help." Shawn explains. Leon's eyes widen. "You know how to stop him" Leon whispers leaning forward. Shawn smiles and cups Leon's face. "You were always a smart boy" he whispers. "You know what you have to do"

Leon glances towards his big brother and Pa. "Thank you" Leon whispers as the demons gurgles and chokes stop. Shawns eyes are wide, full of fear. "Thats not Taker. Taker will be back in.." Leon glances at the calender. "Five months? He'll be a little different but it will be your Taker." Leon explains glances back at his Pa. "Leon?" Shawn asks confused. Leon smiles and nods. "Hi Pa. I..it gets better, I promise. For all of us. But for it to stay better I need you to remember today and I need you to tell that baby about it in the future. You'll know when." Leon explains. "What do I say?" Shawn asks. Leon steps forward. "Here's what you say.."

-----

Taker suddenly groans and starts to choke. "Taker?" Drew asks. This grabs the others attention. "Taker!" Drew yells rushing over to catch the man as he falls. "SHAWN! KEVIN!" Hunter yells. Drews eyes widen as a red mark appears on his forehead. Shawn and Kevin rush in. "Whats wrong?" Kevin asks. "Somethings wrong with dad!" Cassie cries. Shawn rushes over. His eyes immediately see the mark and he smiles. He pulls the collar of takers tshirt down revealing the long line forming on his chest. "He did it" Shawn whispers. Drew examines the mark before looking at shawn. "What?" Drew asks. "He did it. He killed ministry." Shawn smiles wider.

Taker let's out a shakey breathe and his eyes glow purple. Drew steps back as the marks also glow purple before disappearing. "That felt...wrong" Taker mutters. "He did it baby. Our boy did it" Shawn smiles. Taker frowns and looks at shawn. "You...you knew?" Taker asks quietly. "Hes coming home" Shawn smiles ignoring his husband. Kane moves forward, eyes set on shawn. "You knew?" Drew repeats. Shawn senses the sudden shift and backs up. "Its a long story" Shawn states. "We have time" Kevin growls. John suddenly gasps.

"That man was Leon?" John asks. Everyone looks at him. "Ministry visited us and this guy..his face was always a blur for me but he stabbed him...I always thought it was a bad dream.." John explains. "A loop?" Taker asks. "No..he explained how the past Leon's always failed. Died. But our Leon? Our Leon pulled it off" Shawn smiles. "Because you told him the truth. You talked him through it and you set it all up...none of us even knew" Taker mutters in shock. His husband was a smart bastard when he wanted to be. "So..the whole scared of dying thing?" Drew asks. "It was for ministry's benefit. Leon doesn't care about dying" Shawn admits. "Good, because I'm killing the bastard when I get my hands on him" drew growls. "Hes coming home" Kevin sighs. "When?" Cassie asks.

She gets a answer as thunder strikes the valley. "Well someone's home" Taker mutters, still staring at shawn in shock. How long had Shawn had this planned? Shawn managed to remember the details and prepare a whole war plan without Taker or kane ever finding out? Shawn had changed a whole loop, broken it, all on his own. Taker was scared but damn he was also impressed. And surprisingly turned on.

The kids and hunter groan as Taker pulls Shawn into a deep kiss. Shawn gasps but kisses back. He pulls back. "What was that for?" Shawn asks. "That? That's incredibly hot" Taker states. John and cassie gag and hunter groans and complains. "What?" Shawn asks. "You know what. You did this all on your own. You broke a loop. You are a incredibly smart bastard when you want to be and that side of you is so fucking hot" Taker growls. Shawns face burns quickly. "Can we get back to Leon!" John groans. "Of course...um what did you do with Leon's body?" Shawn asks. "Oh it was completely burnt." Taker mutters.

"What?"

-----

Leon's eyes shoot open and he can't fight the groan that escapes him as the bright light blinds him.

The burning sensation racing through his body confirms he's been hit by lightning. He groans as his vision comes too. He rolls onto his back and looks. A tree.

A tree?

The tree on the hill!

He did it!

Leon sits up, way to fast and ends up hunching to the side to throw up. He frowns at the black sludge that came from him.

He's not surprised. The last thing he ate was destroyed in a casket fire.

He takes in the valley as a smile grows. He slowly pulls himself up, his joints groaning and aching. He examines himself. Naked as the day he was born. But the scratch marks from ministry are gone. He smiles and teleports himself back to his old bedroom. He can hear talking downstairs but he'll get to that later.

He grabs some clothes and moves into the bathroom.

He turns his back to the mirror and glances at it. His smile stays. The mark of Undertaker is gone, in its place? Is a scar that is left by lightning. His smile fades slightly when he notices something else.

Roses.

Roses have appeared on his upper back, spreading across his shoulders. He touches them as best as he can and nothing happens. There like tattoos.

Then he thinks back. Roses. Athena.

How could he be so stupid? He still had the scars on his ankles and knees from that time a evil athena used roses to tie his legs up. The thorns and vines left what drew described as beautiful roads up his legs. He glances at how there's only one rose with a vine and it connects to the tip of the lightning scar. He can't help but smile softly. "Glad to have you back Athena." He whispers. Evil athenas Mark would forever be over shadowed by the beautiful spread across his shoulders. He also had a feeling Thomas had something to do with the new scar replacing ministry's old ones.

He discards the shirt and pulls some jeans on. Was this freedom? Was he finally free?

--

Taker shushes everyone as creaking comes from above them. Kane nudges taker. 'Dad' he signs. "I sense Mom as well" Taker states confused. "I'd hope so" a voice calls. Everyone turns and immediately rushes forward. Drew gets there first, pulling Leon into a hug. "Im so sorry. I'm sorry. Sorry. Sorry" drew whimpers. Leon chuckles. "You did the right thing. I'm sorry for making you feel ten times worse with my acting" Leon huffs as drew steps back. "The marks.." Drew begins as he examines Leon's front. Leon holds out his tattooed arms, Leon's torso arm tattoos were complete again. Ministry's scars had cut through them like ugly..well scars.

Leon slowly turns revealing his back. "The mark is gone..but-" Leon cuts taker off. "Lightning. Struck me nice and hard roughly 5..10 minutes ago?" Leon asks. "And the new tattoo?" Cassie asks. "Grandma's gift to me." Leon admits. Taker can't help but smile and pull his youngest son into a hug. "I knew you could do it" Taker whispers. Leon smiles and hugs him back. "You and your pa ever plot behind my back again and I will kill you both" Taker whispers as he squeezes Leon. Leon winces. "Ah-scar still fresh-" Leon whines. "Yeah, probably my dad's way of punishing you" Taker smirks pulling back.

Leon doesn't even get a second before Kevin has him in a tight hold. "Im sorry" Leon whispers closing his eyes. "Shut up" Kevin growls quietly. "I just need to hold you" he adds. Leon sighs and rests his head against the mans chest.

"Its a cool look to be fair." John admits. "Yeah. You should get a tattoo." Cassie smiles. "No. You." John frowns. "No way" she huffs. Leon turns to his siblings. "I die and this is how you greet me?" Leon asks. "Your alive now" John points out. "Hes got a good point" cassie nods. The others watch as the siblings stare at each other, having a silent conversation. They then watch as cassie and John take off with speed and Leon is close after them.

Shawn smiles and hugs taker and drew close. "Im glad he's back." "I'm glad he's alive and safe" drew sighs resting his head against shawns. "Im concerned about my house.. " Taker frowns at the crashing causing the others to laugh.

----

Athena stands on the stairs platform as the kids run after each other. "He did good." Thomas murmurs. "I told you he would." Athena hums as her husband hugs her waist. "Best thing to ever happen to this family he is." Athena adds as the adults walk in. Thomas looks at him. "Shawn Michaels. Who woulda thought?" Thomas chuckles. "Me." Athena smiles as she looks at the blonde.

Thomas smirks as the blonde looks at them. Shawn smiles softly at them and nods slightly. The pair nod back. Taker glances at them, but unlike Shawn, he sees nothing. "What is it?" Taker asks quietly. "Nothing. Just thinking of a new carpet" Shawn smiles causing Taker to groan and throw his head back.

Shawn giggles as Leon finally tackles John only for cassie to jump on him. "Im glad it's over."

----------------------------------------------------------------------NoTEz

Same

I think.

Depends how yall feel about this part.

If no one likes it then I'll probably.. idk change it.

But if people like it, I'll keep it.

I know the ministry fight wasn't big, but I liked the Shawn plot twist and thought that added more, yk humfp to the situation. Also I hate writing fighting scenes. Which I think is clear in the last part of this in the drew vs Leon coffin match. Which I skiped despite it being the main plot of it.

I also think the idea of Leon, this violent force, using something other than animalistic violence to defeat his biggest foe is true character long term story telling. Yes he stabbed him but it was the brains of him and and shawn that pulled it all off.

I do like updating Leon's character design. So either way that'll stick. Also lightning scars are scary, because of how you get them, but so cool looking.

Enjoy:)

#wwe #shawn michaels #the undertaker #wwf #hbtaker #undertaker x shawn michaels #shawn x undertaker #triple h #leon michaels #kevin nash #cassidy michaels #john cena #drew mcintyre #the family of destruction fics #the family of destruction #leons nightmare

[x-angel-dust-x]

I'm bored🤗

1. which eating disorder(s) do you have? Anorexia Binge/Purge Subtype, that turned into fullblown bulimia the last year or two.

2. when did you develop your eating disorder? When I was 11, summer before 6th grade. I realized I accidentally lost weight and got taller, making me lose my childish pudge and look decent. Went on a diet with my mom and got into her diet books, never looked back.


3. are you currently in recovery? Not anymore.


4. honestly, do you want to recover? Yes and no. I just want to be beautiful. I'll do whatever it takes. If that's a healthy weight, I'll deal with the number, but currently it doesn't look like it's swinging that way.


5. how are you doing today? My college canceled class because of the snow!


6. 5 safe foods? Green peppers, carrots, salad, popcorn, popsicles.


7. 5 fear foods? Pizza, pastries, chocolate, cheese, chips


8. do you count calories? I stopped for a bit but I'm back on it


9. what is your max calorie limit? 500 cal. 1000 if I'm having dinner with roommates but only 2x a week.


10. what is your height? 172 cm/,5'8"


11. what is your ultimate goal weight? 119lb, or 129 if Im working out a lot. I don't want to lose my muscle tone. I like being strong af.


12. are you trying to lose weight? Extremely


13. have you ever been called “fat”? Yes


14. have you ever been called “too thin”? Yes and it's amazing


15. what is your current goal weight? 129lb/119lb


16. what was your highest weight? 237.5lb


17. what was your lowest weight? 134lb


18. do you wish you were back at your lowest weight? YES.


19. does your family know about your eating disorder? Yes but I look healthy right now so they aren't worried

20. do your friends know about your eating disorder? My roommate does but no one else


21. do you wish you didn’t have an eating disorder? Of course I do. But it makes for a great distraction from other trauma.


22. have any “free foods”? Veggies like carrots, green peppers, cucumbers I don't calorie count if I have them plain. I don't count olive oil and avocados either since they're good fats and I don't want to scare myself away from eating them.


23. how often do you weigh yourself? About twice a day, morning and night.


24. thinspo or bonespo? Sometimes I have trouble telling the difference but usually Thinspo I think


25. biggest problem area on your body? My calves and face. They're HUGE.


26. favourite part of your body? My veiny hands, my tummy, my butt, my collarbones


27. what kind of results do you want to see? I want a thigh gap so badly, skinny arms that show my muscle, narrow face, tiny waist, easy to fit in an extra small with no squeezing, size 28 jeans and 2 in women's, the validation of judgement, etc.


28. do you purge? Not every day but I do.


29. do you take laxatives? No but I've considered it


30. how often do you purge? Every few days when I binge


31. do you binge? Like a starving man

.
32. how long have you fasted for? A week or two. But I was on drugs to be fair.


33. who’s your biggest thinspiration? Winona Rider in Girl Interupted. This hot butch girl on tiktok.

.
34. favourite eating disorder movie/show/documentary? Starving in Suburbia


35. favourite thinspo picture? The one that's my background photo.


36. can you post a photo of yourself/your body?


37. how does your eating disorder affect your life? I hate socializing and won't have sex


38. what is your BMI? It's like 24 right now 💀


39. do you follow a diet? The A.I.T Diet (Ana in Training)


40. least favourite part about your eating disorder? My massive fluctuation in weight makes me feel out of control. I can't enjoy normal things whether I eat them or not.


41. has your eating disorder ruined any relationships? no, I don't date


42. do you have a “guilty pleasure” food? Chocolate and fast food, I have to keep away from it


43. meanspo or sweetspo? Sweetspo, meanspo just makes me binge and hate myself. Taking care of myself and doing self care makes me want to be healthy.


44. does anyone else in your life have an eating disorder? A girl in my class and my mom


45. ever been inpatient? Every day of my life


46. ever been outpatient? No


47. ever been in residential care? No


48. ever been in a psych ward? Yes


49. are you currently in therapy? No


50. what did you eat today? Binged on Pizza, then stopped and had some popcorn and veggies with dip as a midnight snack


51. are you scared about the holidays? No, it's February and nobody cares about me lol


52. are your family/friends supportive? They literally don't care lol


53. have any other mental illnesses? Massive PTSD is my worst diagnosis, then bipolar 2, then generalized anxiety disorder.


54. looking for ana buddies? YES PLEASE but only long term anas who've lost weight, no beginners pls


55. what is your current weight? 155 lb

#thinspo phone background

[munsonsduchess]

Teenage Wasteland

summary: eddie and the band are about to hit their big break and you want to be there for it all w/c: 2,302 warnings: swearing, underage drinking (kind of, if you squint), that's about it honestly a/n: so i've been gone for ages i know, i just kind of hit a slump tbh and tumblr just wasn't doing it for me so i took a break and i'm hoping to be back more regularly from now on, i just need to curate my dash a little if you enjoy this why not consider reblogging so more people can enjoy it too! this is technically the second part of my mallrats series which much like the god and goddess of hellfire has no real plot it all just sort of links up in different one shots.

(moodboard by me)

Working in the mall had gotten much less terrible in the year since you and Eddie had started dating. You'd met all of Eddie's friends, most of whom also worked in the mall because well that's where all the work was.

Jeff and Gareth who were also in the band were probably exactly what you'd imagined Eddie's friends would look like. Kind of grungy, kind of metal, lots of flannel and ripped jeans. The other friends you were introduced to were a little less than typical.

There was Robin who worked in Scoops Ahoy who didn't seem to have any filter and just said whatever came to mind. She was funny and smart and always gave you the skinny when a new shipment of ice cream was coming in so you guys could get free samples before anyone else. It was hilarious to watch her argue music with the guys who refused to expand their knowledge outside of their own inner circle of 'alternative' and refused to listen to anything popular or top forty related. 

The most surprising were perhaps Chrissy and Steve who looked like they'd stepped out of the latest abercrombie catalogue. Chrissy who was sweet and bubbly and blonde, an ex cheerleader who was the epitome of a bubblegum pop princess. She loved the Spice Girls and NSync and The Backstreet Boys but also Led Zeppelin and Nirvana. She painted her nails pink and wore pink lip gloss but no one ever batted an eyelid and they welcomed her wholeheartedly into the group.

Then there was Steve, who was an honest to god former Shirtless Ambercrombie Dude who'd packed the whole thing in and was now a babysitter to a group of pre teens who seemed to think he was the best thing ever as well as the most lame person to ever exist. He wore Ralph Lauren polos and khakis he bought in the gap. His jeans were ironed for god's sake, not to mention the hair he was so proud of. 

The thing was though these were the most honest, open, loving and accepting group of people you'd ever met in your life and you were so happy you'd met them. 

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ♫ ⋅.} ───── ⊰

You were closing up one Friday night when Eddie came rushing across from the music store,

"Babe, babe babe babe babe babe babe, you aren't gonna believe this" 

"First of all take a breath, second what's going on?" 

"You remember that gig, the one we were told we'd just be the opening act?" you did remember, some other local alternative band was playing a show on Halloween at the Hideout and even though Corroded Coffin had a standing Tuesday night gig they'd been told that if they wanted to play on Halloween they'd be the warm up act for the other band,

"Yeah, what about it?" 

"They broke up. Turns out one of the guys had been sleeping with another guys boyfriend and it's a huge thing but they aren't playing on halloween anymore which means …"

"OH MY GOD YOU GUYS ARE THE HEADLINE ACT!"

"WE'RE THE HEADLINE ACT!"

You couldn't have been happier for Eddie at that moment. You all but flung yourself at him knocking the wind out of both of you, this was huge. The guys practised so hard and they put all their effort and energy into their work so it was amazing to see them getting their big break,

"You have to tell everyone, like immediately. I know Robin is closing up in Scoops but Chrissy had the early shift but there's the payphone outside" 

"You seem way more excited about this than me" Eddie joked, 

"Uh yeah, you're about to become a big time rockstar. Next thing you know you'll be touring with Metallica and James Hetfield will personally sign your guitar" you spoke emphatically, waving your arms around grandly,

"I seriously doubt that's gonna happen after one gig in the Hideout" 

"You don't know that!" 

Eddie laughed again and pulled you away from the now locked shutter and towards the food court where Robin would no doubt be waiting since you and Eddie were her ride home. 

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ♫ ⋅.} ───── ⊰

Everyone else was just as excited to hear about Corroded Coffin's lucky break and so began weeks of planning costumes and how you were all going to get to and from the bar. Steve offered to drive everyone claiming his car would have the most room for you, robin and chrissy and whoever else wanted to come. Throwing a not so subtle hint to Robin about his friend Nancy who would be coming home from College in Boston for fall break. 

Robin pointedly said nothing but did slap Steve on the arm for being a jerk. Chrissy laughed brightly at their antics looking on fondly like she'd never been happier to witness two friends engage in a bitch fest. 

You didn't see much of Eddie outside of work and a quick hi when you saw him in the evenings before he crashed. The band was practising almost all the time now to prepare for the show, Eddie had even written some new songs to play for the first time that night. Word had it that a talent scout was coming down from the city to see the gig, apparently the original headliner pulling out didn't dissuade them from coming. So the stakes were at an all time high. 

The night of the gig you were waiting at the edge of the trailer park for your ride, Steve had called to say his friend Nancy was driving her parents station wagon so rather than have her attempt to navigate the trailer park on Halloween in a 'middle class' car you'd let Steve know where you'd wait instead. 

You'd chosen to dress as Stevie Knicks, who happened to be your Mom's favourite artist and you'd be lying if you didn't admit the beaded shawl was doing things for you. When you spotted the station wagon cresting the hill towards the park you'd waved to signal your location and moments later the door was being opened so you could climb inside.

Once seated you took a moment to appraise the other costumes, Robin had chosen Ripley from Alien, Chrissy had chosen what appeared to be Barbie but as a rockstar from the 80s, Steve was the Terminator and Nancy was Sarah Connor,

"Wow, couples costume. Steve you didn't tell me Nancy was your girlfriend!" you reached into the front seat so you could whack him on the arm,

"What? Ow! No! Nance and I aren't dating" he replied rubbing the sore spot on his arm,

"We used to but it didn't work out" Nancy explained with a genuine smile while Steve pouted in the passenger seat, "you should have seen what he was wearing when Robin and I picked him up"

"This was all we could put together at the last minute. Lucky for us we were able to put this all together" 

"So you guys aren't worried about being seen as a couple all night?" you asked, mostly because you'd rather die than be seen with your ex all night,

"Well it was either this or dress him as Ken to go with Chrissy's Barbie"

"Yeah and I don't need that at all tonight" Chrissy said, "I have major plans" 

The rest of the drive to the hideout entailed Chrissy a) explaining her outfit, it had come from a Barbie movie released in 87 that she just adored and then b) detailing her big plans for the night, hoping at least one beautiful girl into metal would take notice of her 

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ♫ ⋅.} ───── ⊰

The energy inside the bar was electric, you actually thought Chrissy's hair might go on fire with the amount of teasing and hairspray. You'd arrived in the middle of one of the warm up sets and Steve had gone to get everyone a drink while you and the other girls found a table you could steal until Corroded Coffin came on. 

The drinks were watered down and tasted terrible honestly but no one seemed to care. You were catching Nancy up on everything that had happened with the other band and how Eddie and the guys got the headline spot,

"Can you believe? This is gonna be so huge for them" 

"That's amazing. I'm so happy for them, you'll have to introduce me when they're finished" 

"Totally. Also if I get like swept up in emotion Robin knows the guys super well too so she can totally introduce you" 

Robin shot you a look over the top of her drink and Steve tried not to laugh. You'd heard all about Robin's crush and how she'd apparently almost fainted when Nancy came out before leaving for college. Honestly it was kinda cute. 

Chrissy, though she stuck out like a sore thumb amongst all the mullets and various shades of black seemed to also be having a great time. She'd already made more friends than you thought was possible in a dive bar outside a small town in Rural Indiana but you didn't doubt she'd be going home with at least a few phone numbers.

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ♫ ⋅.} ───── ⊰

WHen it was finally time for Corroded Coffin to take the stage you all left your drinks with Steve to take your places at the stage. Pushing and elbowing people out of the way to get a good spot, you wanted Eddie to be able to see you when he came on stage.

"You girls here for the show?" a voice asked by your ear making you recoil as Billy Hargorve stood far too close to you for comfort,

"Yeah we're here for corroded coffin" Nancy replied shooting him a scathing look, "and we don't need company" 

"Those posers are who they got to replace us?" he laughed, "wow, i guess anyone will do when you're desperate" 

Before you could share your thoughts on Billy's opinion Chrissy stepped in and levelled Billy with a punch,

"Those are our friends you jerk!" 

For a second it looked like Billy might say or do something but then a tall blonde guy came over and ushered him away. Not before throwing a look back over his shoulder that told you all exactly how he felt,

"God I hate that guy" Robin sneered, "he's such an asshole" 

"Don't let him bother you, look, they're coming on stage!" Nancy turned everyone's attention back  to the stage where Eddie and the guys had begun to take their places,

"What is up Indiana!" Eddie yelled, "We're corroded coffin and we're here to rock!"

A cheer went up from the surrounding crowd and you managed to catch Eddie's eye before he got started throwing him a good luck kiss, for which you received a wink back.

The crowd went nuts when the band started to play. Eddie, Gareth and Jeff were giving it their all, they played a mixture of covers and their own original songs, some of which you'd neve heard before. 

You could not have been any more proud of your boyfriend at that moment. 

⊱ ────── {.⋅ ♫ ⋅.} ───── ⊰

After the show, and three encores demanded by the crowd, your group pushed their way backstage to congratulate the guys in person,

"Baby you were amazing!" you cried as you launched yourself at Eddie, he caught you easily spinning you around in a circle, 

"Did you see us? We totally killed it!" Jeff exclaimed, "that was seriously metal" 

"The most metal" Robin agreed enthusiastically.

There was a knock on the door followed by an older man in a suit  jacket, white tee  and jeans walking into what passed as the bar's 'dressing room' leaving you all stunned,

"That was quite a show gentlemen. I don't think I've seen a band play to a crowd like that in a long time. At least not in a little local bar like this" 

"Uh yeah man we're glad you liked the show" Gareth said looking around for some help,

"My name is Craig Townsend and I represent Capital Media Entertainment Group. I liked what I saw up there. Tell me, do you write your own music?" 

"Yeah, yeah we do" Eddie replied, "all our stuff is original" 

"That's what I like to hear" Craig pulled a card from his jacket pocket, "come by the office sometime, bring a tape. I'd like to hear more" 

He handed the card to Steve who seemed to be the only one not stunned by what was happening and nodded a goodbye. Once he was gone everyone let out a yell all at once,

"Oh my god he wants us to leave a tape in!" Jeff was shaking Gareth's shoulders, "dude wants to hear our tape!"

"This is so cool!" Chrissy squealed, "you guys are gonna be on the cover of rolling stone before you know it!"

You shot a grin at Eddie who was staring in wonder and awe at the business card he'd taken from Steve,

"We'll be able to say we were there the night Corroded Coffin got their big break" you said nudging your boyfriend, "when you guys go off to LA and become famous rock stars the rest of us can give interviews to shitty indie mags about how we knew you before" 

"If you think you're getting rid of me that easily" Eddie laughed wrapping his arms around you, "you've got another thing coming" 

"We're a team!" Gareth agreed, "all of us" 

"Next stop LA" Nancy laughed, "you'll have to give me an exclusive" 

"Wheeler, I promise you if we make it to LA you're gonna be the only journalist I trust" Eddie replied, his grin infectious.

This was it. This was the big time. Eddie and the guys had made it and he was gonna bring you along for the ride. Like Pat Benatar and Neil Giraldo.

Next stop. LA Baby.

Taglist: @pillow-titties @shenanigans-and-imagines @jobean12-blog @prettyboyeddiemunson @eddiemvnsonss @ches-86 @eddiesmutson @hellfireeddie6 @boomhauer @xbreezymeadowsx @that-lame-ghoul9000 @flashyourgreeneyesatme @anxiousstark @ruinedbythehobbit @winnifredburkleismyhero @inluvweddiemunson @wheaty-melon @lucciaa9 if you’re stricken out it means tumblr won’t let me tag you properly.

If you’d like to be added/removed from the tag list please let me know!

#eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson fic #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson fanfiction #stranger things #stranger things x reader #stranger things fluff #stranger things fic #stranger things fanfic #stranger things fanfiction #fluff #90s au #duchess writes #duchess.txt

[harlstiel]

When you re-watch a show over and over, you tend to notice the (not so) smaller, unnecessary details that you never did the first time through because you aren't so focused on the plot and what's going on anymore.

Aka, Derek Hale has a fatter ass than me, and I'm being sour about it.

What gave this man the right? The audacity?And then he goes and wears the tightest fucking skinny jeans, like I KNOW this man does the little jump thing when he puts on pants. It's a universal experience between people blessed with ass.

This is ridiculous.

#i wonder where he got his sense of fashion from just thinking about it #i mean #this with the leather jacket and henleys... #how did laura even let him out of the house while they were in new york

[hollywoodxwhore]

wanted - part one

This is part one of a series I'm writing! Find the masterlist here.

Colson x Original Female Character, Pete X Original Female Character

Warnings: language, alcohol and drugs mentioned, talk of virginity and mentions of sex, mental health and self-esteem mentioned

Note: This is an au where they aren't famous. The band exists but they're just college kids.

Word Count: 2065

I’ve always been the one who gets picked last.

When I was in elementary and middle school, I was always the one chosen last for the team, too skinny and unlikable, or maybe just too invisible to be picked. In high school when I finally had a group of friends, I was never the one that guys went for. I had one boyfriend in high school because my best friend wanted to double-date, so she set me up with her boyfriend’s best friend. We lasted two weeks before I got the ick and broke up with him over text message.

Maybe it was for the best. I had no interest in actually dating guys in high school. I just liked pining after the ones who would never know I existed. It was safer that way; I couldn’t be rejected or get hurt. I found solace in my head, in spending time alone and learning to like it. 

I had no interest in sex in high school; it grossed me out and scared the shit out of me, so even if I’d had a boyfriend, I would have never been able to get past making out with him. I was too uncomfortable in my own skin, and the thought of letting someone else see me caused me so much anxiety that it made me sick. 

By the time I was 21, I was still a virgin and it was humiliating. All of my friends had lost it and had slept with more than one person at that point, and there I was, never having even gone past making out. I finally lost it to one of my guy friends and cried on the drive home. A year later and I haven’t gone any further than a few handjobs and one blowjob, and I still haven’t had a boyfriend.

I still feel like guys look right through me. I’m not sure why. I think I’m pretty enough, relatively tall with pale blonde hair and green eyes. I wouldn’t say I’m supermodel beautiful by any means, but I’m not ugly. All of my friends tell me I could have anyone I wanted, but I know that isn’t true. 

For all of those reasons and more, I can’t wrap my head around why I’ve found myself in the situation I’m in: torn between two gorgeous men who both want me. I want them, too. Both of them. I have no idea how to handle it, and I know it’s all going to crash and burn soon enough. 

My life is pretty boring. I don’t really do much other than spend time with girlfriends, do schoolwork, work, and sleep. I’ve decided that this year, I’m going to have some fun. I’m going to meet guys and stop being so timid about it. I’m going to go to parties when invited rather than turn them down like I always do. I’m wasting my youth and I don’t want to do it anymore. 

So when my classmate and friend invites me to her band’s show, I say yes. 

Sophie is my closest friend in my creative writing program. She’s a horror writer but she’s also a kickass guitar player. She plays in a local band with quite a following; they’re attempting to make it big. I have no idea if they’re good or not; this will be my first time watching them perform. Sophie is the only girl in the band, so she told me she needs girlfriends there to support her. 

She told me it was a basement show, nothing too fancy, so I don’t have to dress up. Still, I’m not really sure what to wear to something like this. There’s an afterparty at Sophie’s bandmate’s house and I’m invited to that, too. It’ll be a smaller group of people and she’s insisted that I’ll love her friends. I’m anxious, but excited, too. I hope she’s right. 

It’s still warm out, so I decide on a black bodysuit and some high-waisted jean shorts with my favorite high-top Converse. I French-braid my hair, knowing it’ll be hot in the basement, and keep my makeup and jewelry light. I’m feeling good when I leave my apartment, stopping to pick up another one of our classmates, Alicia. 

“I hope they’re good or this is gonna be awkward,” Alicia says dryly, applying lipstick in my car mirror. 

I chuckle and glance at the GPS. “We’ll support her nonetheless,” I tell her. 

“Honestly, they can suck all they want. I’m just going to see the guys in the band,” she says, then moans. 

I wince and laugh. “What the hell is wrong with you?”

Alicia shoots me a look, her brown eyes glinting. “Have you not seen them?” she asks incredulously. “Every single one of them is fucking hot.”

“No way,” I say skeptically, glancing at her momentarily. 

“I mean it,” Alicia says, pulling her phone from her purse. She navigates for a few moments, then holds her phone out. “My personal favorite is the drummer, Rook.”

“Rook?” I ask, glancing at a picture of a guy with a nice smile, wincing. “What’s with the braids?”

“Hey, don’t knock the braids,” Alicia says defensively, pulling her phone back. “His name is JP but he goes by Rook. They all have nicknames. This is Slim, he does the keyboard and stuff.” She turns the phone back to me, phone displaying a picture of a man with warm, brown skin and a beard. “Brandon is his real name, but no one calls him that.”

“Okay, he’s cute,” I offer. 

“Baze, or Steve, plays bass,” she says.

“Baze. Bass. Got it,” I say, glancing at a picture of a man with incredible hair and a beard to match. “He’s awesome.”

“And sexy,” Alicia adds. “Justin plays guitar.” Another picture of a man, this one with short dreadlocks. She’s not wrong, every single person is good looking. 

“And finally,” she says. “The one that gets all the panties wet.”

“Ew,” I interrupt.

“Kells, the lead singer.” Alicia holds her phone up and I have to do a double-take. On her phone is a picture of, quite possibly, the most handsome man I’ve ever laid eyes on. Bleach blonde hair, blue eyes, nose rings, jewelry in his ears and on his neck and on his fingers. Skin littered with tattoos.

“Holy shit,” I say, taking her phone to ogle him while at a red light.

“I told you,” Alicia  says smugly. 

“Is Kells his real name?” I ask, still fixating on the photo.

“Colson,” Alicia says. “Most people call him Kells because their band is called-”

“Machine Gun Kelly,” I answer for her, nodding. “Gotcha.”

The light turns green and I reluctantly hand Alicia back her phone. My skin feels slightly flushed and my heart is beating a little faster. All from a picture. I blow out a breath to regain some composure. 

“Colson is single, by the way,” Alicia says, since I don’t ask. “But I guess he doesn’t really date. He mostly sleeps around.”

“Gotcha,” I answer, trying not to sound disappointed. I snap out of it quickly, though, because there’s no way that someone who looks like Colson would go for me. 

Soon enough, we arrive at the venue and park in the parking lot. We go inside and squeeze our way into the basement, already stuffed to the gills with people and stiflingly hot. I look around, taking in the haze of smoke hovering above the bodies, smell the scent of cigarettes and weed and the slightly fruity hint of vape smoke. My eyes land on the stage where a couple of people are testing instruments. I don’t recognize any of them from the pictures, so I assume they’re crew.

“How popular are they?” I yell to Alicia over the noise.

“Pretty popular!” Alicia calls back. “Decent amount of streams on Spotify, I think.” I just nod. 

We squeeze our way to a spot near the front, and we spot Sophie standing by the side of the stage, a beer in hand as she talks to someone…was it Justin? She turns to spot us and squeals excitedly. “You made it!” she gushes, waving us over. We embrace her together. “This is Justin, the other guitarist. Justin, this is Alex and Alicia.”

“Nice to meet you,” Justin says, shaking our hands. “Glad Soph’s friends could make it.”

“Show’s starting in five minutes, let me grab you beers,” Sophie says, waving for us to follow her. Behind the stage, there’s a small area with tables, equipment, and a fridge. Sophie extracts two beers and hands them to us. 

“Sophie, these your friends?” a voice asks. The guy I recognize as Rook, the drummer, approaches, and Alicia blushes. “I’m Rook.” He shakes our hands, holding eye contact with Alicia for a moment. I feel a slight wave of insecurity. It’s always someone else before it’s me. 

Sophie turns her head. “Kells! Slim! Baze!” she calls. “Come meet my girls!”

Three men approach, and my eyes immediately land on Colson. Holy shit, he’s even hotter in person. I will myself to relax, play it cool. The guys shake our hands, and sure enough, Colson’s eyes barely skim over mine before he’s looking away, seemingly too cool for this interaction. I’m ready to get into the crowd where I can hide again. 

“Five minutes,” a woman calls out to them, and the boys scatter. Sophie leads us to a spot in the front row and my heart rate eases just a little now that I’m not in the presence of so many gorgeous men. 

“Hot as fuck, right?” Alicia says with a smirk.

I shrug. “Not like I have a chance with any of them,” I mutter.

Alicia frowns. “That’s so not true, Alex,” she says.

I raise a brow. “Colson barely noticed me. Rook was eye-fucking you.”

“He was, wasn’t he?” Alicia gushes excitedly, and I roll my eyes, but I can’t help but smile. Before our conversation can continue, the lights dim and the band comes out. The room erupts in deafening cheers and I link arms with Alicia as the crowd begins to swell and shift. 

“What’s up, we’re Machine Gun Kelly,” Colson says into the mic, another cheer following his words. “Thanks for coming out.” He puts the pick to his guitar and into the mic, shouts, “2, 3, 5!” Immediately, the band breaks into song and I’m instantly impressed by the way they blend. 

Colson starts to sing and it’s like my eyes glue themselves to him. I can’t look anywhere else. He’s captivating, the best stage presence I’ve ever experienced, and I’ve been to many concerts. The way he moves, the way he plays the guitar, I’m unable to take my eyes off of him. The song moves into the chorus and I fall in love with his voice, the raspy depth of it, the way it moves over the syllables and notes. Fuck, I’m so attracted to this man. 

All night, I try to watch Sophie, try to watch Baze on the bass or Rook on the drums, but my eyes always drift back to Kells. Colson. No wonder every girl wants him. He’s like the human embodiment of sex. 

The show ends and everyone claps wildly, including me. It’s the best show I’ve ever been to in my life, and I’m immediately disappointed that it’s over. Alicia turns to me, eyes wild and excited. “Holy shit!” she yells.

“That was fucking incredible!” I say, adrenaline rushing through me. “Wow!”

“Let’s go find Sophie!” Alicia says, taking my hand. We make our way backstage and Sophie runs at us, embracing us again.

“Sophie, holy shit!” I gush. “That was incredible!”

“Thanks,” Sophie says, beaming widely. 

“Good show, Soph,” Colson says, wrapping her in a hug.

“That was amazing,” I blurt, looking at Colson.

He gives a lazy smile. “Thanks,” he says, and immediately, he’s gone again, going over to hug Rook.

“You coming to the after party?” Sophie asks. 

“Of course,” Alicia says.

Sophie glances over her shoulder and leans in conspiratorially. “Rook thinks you’re cute,” she tells Alicia with a smirk. 

Alicia squeals. “Oh, I’m 100% sucking his dick tonight,” she says matter-of-factly, and Sophie and I crack up. 

“We’ll probably be there in like an hour,” Sophie says. “Gotta clean up.”

“We’ll go grab something to eat,” I say. “See you there!”

#machine gun kelly #mgk #colson baker #pete davidson #machine gun kelly fanfic #mgk fanfic #colson baker fanfic #pete davidson fanfic

[anneapocalypse]

The Whole Nug: Culinary Treasures of Thedas

Warnings: discussion of fantasy imperialism and real-world imperialism and colonialism.

The final chapter of The World of Thedas Volume 2 is dedicated to a collection of in-universe recipes! Originally this was just going to be a part of my general World of Thedas write-up, but this part got long enough that I decided to break it off on its own, so here we are.

"The Whole Nug" is on the whole a really cool chapter, and besides the flavor text added to various cultures of Thedas by these dishes, I love what it contributes to the worldbuilding just to see such an array of ingredients confirmed as existing in this universe. I would feel pretty confident at this point saying that if a fruit or vegetable exists in the real world, it is probably not lorebreaking to assume it exists in Thedas unless there is some specific reason why it wouldn't. Which is great if you want to write fanfiction about food!

That said, there are some real-world imports that I find kind of questionable.

Let's start with the fact that Thedas apparently has baking powder. I understand that Dragon Age does not correspond either culturally or aesthetically to any one era of real human history and while it draws from history, it does so broadly, vaguely, and with many creative liberties. At this point it doesn't really feel accurate to say that Dragon Age is medieval fantasy even in the loosest sense, as even the aesthetic of the games has been increasingly diverging from stock medieval fantasy ever since the first game, culminating in Tight Pants for Everyone in Inquisition. (I wonder what the costuming in DA4 is going to look like now that skinny jeans aren't fashionable anymore.) I'm not going to get into the whole history of baking powder and its precursors here, but if you want to fall down the same rabbit hole I did in reading this, here you go. Suffice it to say, it does feel a little weird to me that a distinctly pre-industrial setting would have widely available a product that wasn't even invented, never mind mass-produced, until the mid-19th century.

The south hasn't figured out black powder yet, but they sure did chemical leavening agents! Orlais needs its tiny cakes, I guess.

Incidentally, I am pretty sure Marie du Lac Erre's Sweet Ruin is milano cookies. The story behind it does seem very Orlesian, and certainly works in-universe, so if we accept the existence of baking powder as our premise, well, I'm fine with it.

The funny thing about this is that despite the inclusion of easily-accessible but lore-questionable ingredients in some recipes which make them actually usable, other recipes are clearly included for entertainment purposes only and not intended to be usable in real life, unless you happen to have access to a peat bog. There are also recipes whose instructions definitely do not describe precisely what the illustrations show, such as the Fish and Egg Pie and Nug-Nug, but I don't mind this because the illustrations are highly entertaining. We also get a little bit of plausible in-universe error, as Lady Ledoure seems unaware that Starkhaven is ruled by a Prince and not a King.

On the whole, the recipes are really fun to read and the illustrations enjoyable to look at. But I do have some issues from a worldbuilding perspective with dishes that don't seem to take into account the availability and cost of certain foods.

For example, the Raider Queen's Bread of Many Tongues, aka banana bread:

They say the Inquisition lived off this bread at the height of the war against Corypheus.

This is, as a piece of worldbuilding, utterly baffling. Bananas are tropical. In Thedas, they apparently grow only in the far north, namely Par Vollen and Rivain. A note on the recipe itself recommends Rivaini bananas as "an acceptable substitute," noting that "Most of us aren't mad enough to rain Qunari lands solely for the purposes of baking." So we have right here an acknowledgment that trade with Par Vollen is pretty much out of the question. Therefore the crates of bananas we see all over the place in Inquisition likely come from Rivain, which still means they had to make their way all the way south to the Frostback Mountains.

Look, bananas are cheap and plentiful in most of North America in this real world that we live in because... of a mess of sociopolitical factors I'm not here to write about today but here's a rundown if you like. I have a hard time believing that bananas come so cheap in the south of Thedas. Barring some sort of extremely lucrative trade deal between the Inquisition and Rivain, which I don't recall hearing anything about, bananas should be a luxury food, not a staple. Furthermore, banana bread is a recipe perfect for old bananas beginning to go soft, not what you do with a perfect, ripe and rare tropical fruit.

If anything, the staples of the Inquisition diet should be like, ram meat and well-aged cheese. You know, the sort of stuff you can't walk twenty paces from Haven without stumbling over. Not a fruit that only grows clear across the continent.

So for kicks, here's two possible Watsonian explanations for this very silly line:

Josie knocked out an incredible deal with Rivain or Rivaini merchants offscreen somewhere that resulted in the Inquisition being shipped piles of bananas. Just, a fuckload. All these bananas started going off before they could eat them all so the head cook ordered sacks of Orlesian baking powder and everyone had to eat banana bread for weeks until they were all sick of it. (This is probably the theory I'm going to favor.)

The line isn't true. It's a piece of marketing cooked up by the Rivaini banana industry looking to expand their trade routes.

But I don't think anything tops one the "Dalish" recipes for sheer level of "Whose idea was this?"

First, the one that I think works: "Dalish Deep Forest Comfort." This recipe is presented in the notes as being conferred to us by someone who is not Dalish, and furthermore the author already notes a substitution in the ingredients, calling for cherry tomatoes in place of the beetle larvae which the Dalish prize but which offends the author's palate. Therefore we could assume that the recipe has been altered in other ways from the way the Dalish might eat it, and is not necessarily "authentic." Then too, as the author claims that the "Dalish elf clans in southern Orlais have enjoyed this dish for hundreds of years," this dish could date back to the time of the elven state, before the Dalish were nomadic, and would likely have undergone adaptation by the Dalish themselves when they were displaced and became nomadic.

That said, most of these ingredients work! Halla butter and cheese, garlic and mushrooms and elfroot which grow wild, edible nuts and flowers. While I have more questions about "string squash" (which the author specifically notes is essential to the authentic dish), gourds very well could grow wild in Orlais, making this dish very possible for a people who hunt and forage. Even the rock salt might be gathered from caves. This works. I accept this.

I do want to talk about “Hearth Cakes,” though. (Note: When I first wrote this post, I made an incorrect assumption about the inspiration for Hearth Cakes. This post has since been edited to correct that mistake.)

Hearth Cakes are presented here as “common Dalish fare,” though again, presented here as from an author who is not Dalish. The author notes that the Dalish use “hardwood ash” as leavening, and this actually does make a lot of sense, as this likely corresponds to potash, the real world precursor to baking soda. It’s also the sort of thing that could be made by nomadic people (see the history of baking powder I linked above). The egg is a little less plausible since I don’t remember ever seeing a Dalish clan with chickens, but it is possible they collect eggs from wild fowl. The spices are harder for me to explain, because I doubt that cinnamon and nutmeg can be foraged in the south, and they would be expensive to procure even through trade. I could believe that this is an addition to make the cakes richer for an Orlesian palette; the egg could also be explained this way.

We also have this little sidebar:

One wonders where the Dalish obtain their sugar. They certainly do not trade with Tevinter or Rivain, as we do. Where, then do they gain the precious stuff that makes baking such a delight? I shall tell you: they steal it. I have heard many a story of roving Dalish bands attacking freeholds, robbing them of gold, livestock, and, yes, sugar and spices. So guard well your kitchens, my dears. You never know when an elf may be watching.

Okay, sure. So, this is clearly coming to us from an in-universe source repeating common human prejudices against the Dalish and against elves in general. I am not going to try to argue that no elf has ever stolen anything, or that a desperate clan would never resort to raiding to fend off starvation. I would note though that nothing we’ve seen of the Dalish clans in the games—including an origin story in which you play an elf living with their clan—indicates that robbing freeholds provides a notable share of their food. In fact, Keeper Marethari in the Dalish elf opening of Origins will chide you if you kill the shemlen who venture too close to the camp, pointing out that provoking local human settlements endangers the whole clan. By contrast, we do hear quite a bit about Dalish hunters and how important they are to the clan’s sustenance. So, let’s take biased information with the appropriate grain of salt. Or sugar.

But this raises a larger question and it’s not just about sugar. You could remove the sugar and spices from this recipe and it would still produce a tasty bread, just not such a sweet one. We could write off sugar as an Orlesian addition. What we can’t write off is the core ingredient: wheat flour. This is a question I had when reading The Masked Empire, too, which specifically noted a Dalish clan eating food made from wheat. This isn’t an ingredient that can be foraged and processed by a nomadic people at the kind of scale required to make it a staple food. I don’t see how the Dalish could be regularly eating wheat without regular contact with humans—something we know most clans avoid, both for the preservation of their culture and for their own safety. Some clans do engage in limited trade, but this would be supplemental to their staples of hunting and foraging. It simply makes no sense for these ingredients to comprise dietary staples for nomadic clans who sustain themselves mainly through hunting. It would actually make far more sense for these foods to be a staple of alienage culture, since alienage elves live in human cities, trade in their markets, and eat the same foods.

Since writing this original post, I've since learned that according to this tweet from writer Joanna Berry, the recipe for Hearth Cakes is based on her mother's recipe for Welsh cakes. I think it's really sweet that she contributed a family recipe for the book, and I hate to knock that inspiration, but I still don't think it particularly makes sense in this in-universe context, and I do wish the application had been thought through a little more.

There is nothing wrong with drawing inspiration from real-world sources, where the resulting worldbuilding makes sense within the fictional universe. The prejudice of elves as thieves, for example, does mirror real-world prejudices against nomadic peoples such as the Roma and Travellers, and it maps fine onto the fictional world of Dragon Age for humans to hold such prejudices against nomadic elves. Where the inspiration does not make in-world sense, however, it sticks out, draws attention to itself in a way that does no justice to either the real history from which it draws, or the fiction it serves (or doesn't).

So I'm calling this one a swing and a miss.

Lest I end on a sour note, let's talk about some more recipes I like!

Spiced Wine sounds quite delicious and is something I might even try for real at a party sometime. I might not be so eager to construct my own Fish and Egg Pie, but it makes for a fun little morsel of worldbuilding for a city-state we haven't yet seen, taking the local geography into account with the note that the pie is made with poached fish from the Minanter River. Likewise, Pig Oat Mash is a staple at the Hanged Man that I'm now going to be able to imagine Hawke and company tearing into from steaming bowls after a long night of questing. Pickled Eggs, Alamarri Picked Krone, and Turnip and Barley Stew are great flavor text for Ferelden. Nug-Nug and Mad Bernard's Gift of Flesh are entertaining creations with wonderful illustrations.

Despite some fumbles, this little culinary compendium is on the whole a really great addition to the book and the greater body of Dragon Age lore. Besides which, returning to these recipes and writing about them has made me very hungry. I'm going to go get a snack.

If you've read this chapter, do you have a favorite recipe? Any that you would try making (or have tried) yourself? And if you haven't read it, do you have any favorite in-universe food items generally? Any foods you wonder about their existence in Thedas, or think they should exist?

Crosspost. Originally posted on dreamwidth on 5/18/21.

#dragon age #dragon age meta #world of thedas #blunders of thedas

[acorpsecalledcorva]

Since I'm no longer under 25 and can't eat whatever I want without consequences anymore there's this one particular trend I've noticed. Every year, around mid to late November I gain about 10kgs which refuses to budge, until around February when it suddenly drops off again. Doesn't matter if I stick to the exact same food routines, diet, exercise, or even treat myself and indulge in the festivities, it's frighteningly stable.

I don't actually care if I gain weight, I'm really not worried at all about being fat and I think fat bodies are beautiful, BUT, my comfort item ever since I was a teenager has been my black jeans. When I was 15 I had a pair ripped to absolute shreds all the way up to my underwear but I just refused to let them go. If a pair gets a hole in the crotch or the zip breaks I want to cry, and so not being able to fit into the ones that I have is a disaster. I don't want new ones, I want my ones. The ones I wear every day but also on special occasions because they're my favourite.

This has been a complicated issue while transitioning, because hips getting wider and a bigger ass is absolutely something I carnally desire, and am in love with the changes, but I've also had to give up some of my jeans (I keep them in a box on top of my wardrobe because they aren't broken, they just don't fit my new shape at all)

Anyway, this week I've finally gone over the weight drop cliff for this year but now I'm on estrogen and progesterone my body doesn't want to let go of any weight below my waist, even if I've lost a fair amount above it. It's part of the compositional changes, fat burns at very different rates on different parts of the body, skeletons don't play all that much of a role in it it's just what gives estrogen dominant and testosterone dominant bodies their recognisable shape.

All this is to say that right now my body looks like this, like someone put the top half of a skinny white dude on the bottom half of a Pixar mum

And I have to keep wearing the wrong trousers for a little while longer

[crykit]

Here's what I've noticed since losing 20lbs:

- No more love handles! My jeans are nearly flat on my hips!

- I have to use hairties to tighten the waist of my exercise shorts, since they keep slipping off off me 💔 goodbye emotional support gym shorts

- My wrists are thinner and can fit into mason jars when I'm washing them

- Way smaller appetite. I mean it. It's easy to restrict because I'm hardly ever hungry

- My stomach doesn't distort my shirts anymore. It isn't flat yet, but it doesn't go over the waistband of my jeans

- No more double chin, and a sharper jaw line in general

- My thighs are definitely smaller. I can't see a physical difference because of body dysmorphia, but! My jeans no longer have thigh rips from chafing.

- Some of my skinny jeans fit like regular pants now. I have to go down a size or two.

- My fingers are actually thinner. They aren't slim and bony, but they aren't sausages anymore

- I actually crave healthier foods. I still get junk food cravings, don't get me wrong. Takis are my weak point. But when I'm watching a movie or playing video games, I want to snack on veggies dipped in cilantro lime salsa.

- I crave bread/carbs less, but that might just be because I mostly avoid it

#i also bruise easily. which i think is cute <3 #and my collarbones are a little more visible i think. not sure #mine

[hidingourstruggles]

#1: Guilt

"Well, that's all for class today. Make sure to finish reading the textbook section for tomorrow so we can discuss it in groups." Mrs. Emerson announces as she strides out the room.

My heart dreads as everyone starts filing books into their bags and bustling into the busy hallways. Don't get me wrong. I'm as eager as they are to leave this classroom. It's what comes next that seems to be keeping my bum on the chair. 

"Why aren't you packing up? Stacy's already there waiting for us."

I look at Liz, her slender body in her tight, ribbed top and light blue skinny jeans, texting away as she taps her foot impatiently. 

"On it," I murmur as I slide my chair back and look down at my gray sweatpants.

"Could you go any slower" she states as I get up and swing my backpack across my overfit hoodie. 

I trudge along the hall that inconveniently seems shorter than usual as I rack my brain to think of any excuse to avoid the coming situation. Unfortunately, I've already used up all my excuses this week, so today, I have no way out. 

It's okay, I tell myself. It's fine.

Discomfort engulfs my face as we enter the cafeteria, but I push my emotions down and smile as Stacy rushes towards us. I can't help but notice how good her body looks in her mini skirt and cropped cardigan. 

"Hurry up. I'm starving," Stacy exclaims as she loops her arms into ours and drags us to the line of students. 

I pick up my tray and pause for a second while I scan the food.

" You better not pick at a salad again, Emily. They even have your favourite pasta today." Liz nags as she and Stacy pile their plates up. 

I force a smile on my face before stating as if it's obvious, "of course I'm going for the pasta." I hesitate, not long enough for them to notice, before I scoop some on my plate, spreading it out to make the portion look bigger than it actually is before taking a seat across from them. 

Okay, I skipped breakfast and only had one meal yesterday. This should be fine. After school, I'll go to the gym and run for an extra 30 minutes. Eating lunch is normal, not something to feel guilty about. 

"Emily? Hello?" Stacy waves at my face, breaking me out of my thoughts. 

"Why aren't you eating? Don't bring up some diet nonsense because you're so skinny you gotta eat up!"

"Yea Emily, you don't even need to diet. I would die for your body!" 

I try hard not to frown at the irony. Stacy and Liz are the epitomes of perfect bodies. They would never understand how I feel having to go around with them. It takes every nerve in my body to push down a scowl and keep a straight face so that they don't notice my discomfort. I pick at my pasta a bit before shoving some into my mouth. My stomach starts to squeeze as guilt floods over me. I ingest some more before I can't take it anymore. I need it out. 

"Where are you going?" Stacy asks as I get up from my seat.

"Just gotta run to the bathroom. I'll be right back."

I slowly turn and fake a calm walk out of the cafeteria. Right when I'm out of their site, I dash to the washroom and barge into an empty stall. I stick my finger as far back as I can before I double up over the toilet and release all the junk from inside. Relief falls over me, quickly followed by shame.

It's okay, they don't know, nobody knows.

[apple-pie-42]

I've come to realize that my clothing style is mostly whatever is easy, comfortable and practical. So that could mean when it's hot and I'm wearing a sports bra and boxer briefs in the house if I had a loose sun dress I'd throw it on real quick to take the dogs out as opposed to putting pants/shorts and a top on. If I'm leaving the house to go anywhere I'd most likely put sweatpants and a tank top on. Because when I am more likely to be around men I don't want to be wearing a dress, makes me uncomfortable. I go to the woods with the pups, jeans, boots and t-shirt (or maybe long sleeved button up with tank top).

I don't think I'd have an objection to wearing skirts and dresses like I do if I hadn't been molested as a kid. I don't feel safe in them.

Add to that, I was made fun of for my skinny legs for years, by ppl who claimed to love me, so now I have trouble wearing anything that shows my legs....even though they aren't that skinny anymore.

#tw:child molestation mention #tw: child abuse #personal

[illiteratewritersstuff]

Part 1 - I was scared

I was scared. I wasn't ready. I was unsure. I felt like I had to do this.

I know it sounds like I'm talking about losing my virginity, I'm not, that ship sailed a long time ago.

I'm 23, I had just gotten out of 3 year relationship, not a good ending. Someone going through something similar to me, had me to talk to. In fact, it was my ex boyfriends bestfriend. His girlfriend and my boyfriend had hooked up, was a bit of a shock. We had been friends years before he even hooked up with this girl, so we naturally got along. He didn't exactly have no one, but he reached out to me a lot. Over time, he tells me in person that he doesn't think we should be friends anymore. Not because he was going to get back together with his girlfriend, who hated me at this point because i found out about her and my boyfriend and made them tell him. Not because he was going to be friends with my now ex boyfriend. Not because he had any influence going towards him, I thought of other things it could be but deep down I knew what it was.

"I can't be friends with you anymore, Charlotte, because I've found myself attracted to you and I don't think we can be just friends." Elijah tells me. I sort of sit there, unsure what to say. I'm not good at any sort of confrontation, and even though this wasn't exactly a bad thing, I guess deep down I didn't want it to be true. Now, this isn't the first time we had feelings for each other, it's just the first time it had been said to each other.

To back pedal, he had a party with, say, 15-20 people. Everyone had just left, literally they were in their car right out the front without even starting the car yet when he told me this. I get anxious, I don't really say anything, especially not saying the same thing back to him. It had been like a month since we had found out, it's been about 2 weeks since him and his girlfriend, Sophie, had broken up. I wasn't exactly stable, even while I was with my ex, Levi, I couldn't fully let myself truly be his. I wanted to, but my guard had been up for far too long.

Because I'm anxious, we go out the back and sit on the cool grass. It was around 1am, it was quiet, music was no longer playing, everyone in the neighborhood was asleep, so I had at least some sort of state of mind to focus on what to say next. Elijah said he needed the 'liquid courage' to bring himself to tell me, and if I had left before the last person had left, he would have walked to my house. He's sitting there, sort of facing me, just picking at the grass, it was obvious he was freaking out at my reaction.

"It's not that the feelings aren't reciprocated, because I think they are, I just don't think you're ready for this. I don't think you're over Sophie." Why I said that, I don't know, I guess I just didn't want to hurt his feelings and it's not like he repulsed me or anything, he's a good looking guy, I loved the skinny jeans he always wore, I loved his hair, his beard, his eyes were gorgeous. "I am over Sophie, I had to do something to find out but now I know I'm over her otherwise I wouldn't be saying this to you." "I don't know, I'm scared to say how I feel. I don't want this to be some sort of joke you're playing on me that Sophie put you up to." I say this because I've seen him be cheated on before by other girlfriends but he still gives them chances. "Charlotte, I would never do that to you and I hope you know that. It took a lot of self motivation, with the help of some bourbon and coke, to tell you this and I couldn't let myself say it to you in person. I didn't want this to be something I told you online." I noticed while Elijah was telling me this he had stopped playing with the grass and was trying to look me in the eyes, "I thought they were just small feelings I was trying to push to this side because we're friends and have been each other's rock since this whole mess started. I figured out my feelings for you are a lot more than I initially thought, I saw you tonight and you looked just... beautiful. I knew I had to tell you while I had that motivation in me, whether you felt the same or not, you needed to know." that's when I knew for sure he meant what he was saying. He was serious. I was blushing because he called me beautiful.

After talking about this for a while, moving around to different spots, we were on the stairs, me sitting on the stairs closer to the stop, him standing on the step a few steps down so he could look at me. "You know I wanted to find an excuse to be near you tonight? When we started playing cards against humanity I wanted to sit next to you but Daniel sat there before I could. To be honest I was quite a bit jealous about you guys laughing and showing each other your cards to see which would be funnier, he's a shy guy so it was a bit out of character for him to laugh with you, let alone speak to someone of the opposite gender." For some reason the fact he was jealous made me feel special, although I felt like I had to reassure him, "Trust me," I say with a smile, "He seemed pretty cool but he's really not my type. He has a good sense of humor though I'll tell you that. Did you see how many times he picked my card? I'm hilarious and we both know I'm funnier than you! Maybe he'll be my new bestfriend." we both laugh and it goes silent for a second, then I realise while we've been talking, he's getting closer and closer to me. "Can I please kiss you for a second?" I felt something in my gut, but I don't think it was the alcohol, maybe I actually started feeling something for him. I gave him my consent, he slowly gets closer to my face, puts my hair behind my hair, places his hand on the side of my face very gently and kisses me. I really felt something then and I was a bit stunned. He had very nice lips, I liked that, I never noticed his lips before. It was such a nice, long yet gentle kiss, it was the kind of kiss where you feel like nothing else matters and you're the only two people who exist. Don't get me wrong, I know how ridiculous that sounds but it's the only way I can explain it.

Although I really didn't want it to end, the alcohol was waring off and it started to get cold and unlike him I wearing a short and somewhat flowy dress, one that would easy lift up in the wind, so we went inside. We start chatting on the couch, just normal stuff we would talk about when we were friends. Next thing I know we're on the couch making out, he lays me down and he's in between my legs on top of me. I'm thinking are we about to have sex? My dress is lifted up, maybe, no, we couldn't be, but if we did I'm not exactly going to say no. All of a sudden he stands up and starts pacing around, walks towards me wanting to do it again but then starts pacing around again. I sit up on the couch and ask if he's okay. He sits down on the floor right in front of me, facing the other way. "I'm sorry it's just be years since I've been with anyone other than Sophie, so making out basically dry humping with you is giving me anxiety." "Clearly," I wrap my arms around him, "I understand."

I realise it's almost sun up so I tell him I better get going because I left my medication there and I don't sleep well in other peoples houses, plus I didn't want to freak him out but I didn't tell him that. I ordered an uber because I didn't feel like walking, he kiss me a big hug goodbye. I'm in the uber and he immediately messages me, nothing important or anything, he just wanted to talk to me again.

Once I got home I realised what had just happened and I start getting anxiety, just the thought of having feelings for someone else is freaking me out. I sit out on the veranda and have a smoke to calm my nerves. We're still talking and I notice the sun is coming up and it's getting light out. He sends me a photo of the sun, so I send one back and message him telling him we should probably stop talking now and go to sleep and continue the conversation after we wake up.

#love #new love #connection #friends #confusion #kiss #fiction

[michaelgovehateblog]

i hadn't realised that some people are like,, actually anti skinny jeans, i thought it was jokey. i mean they're just fairly basic jeans and they're easy to pair with lots of things, actively hating them now is so weird

#also so what if they're 'out of fashion' a lot of people still wear them #and just because other cuts are in style now doesn't mean you have to start hating skinny jeans like? #and same with skater skirts seemingly #when they're just a basic skirt #i hate how much you're supposed to dictate what you wear based on current trends #different clothings are allowed to coexist #big shock but you can wear both mum jeans style jeans AND skinny jeans! #but also something as basic as skinny jeans aren't going to just go away because they're apparently not trendy anymore they're just a basic #also with how quickly trends change are you supposed to just be throwing out your entire wardrobe constantly? because thats not good #sorry mini rant just fashion trends are an annoying thing to me #or rather not things coming into fashion but rather how when something is no longer the most fashionable thing you're supposed to suddenly #even if they objectively still look good like skinny jeans or skater skirts do #not politics

[x-angel-dust-x]

I'm bored🤗

1. which eating disorder(s) do you have? Anorexia Binge/Purge Subtype, that turned into fullblown bulimia the last year or two.

2. when did you develop your eating disorder? When I was 11, summer before 6th grade. I realized I accidentally lost weight and got taller, making me lose my childish pudge and look decent. Went on a diet with my mom and got into her diet books, never looked back.


3. are you currently in recovery? Not anymore.


4. honestly, do you want to recover? Yes and no. I just want to be beautiful. I'll do whatever it takes. If that's a healthy weight, I'll deal with the number, but currently it doesn't look like it's swinging that way.


5. how are you doing today? My college canceled class because of the snow!


6. 5 safe foods? Green peppers, carrots, salad, popcorn, popsicles.


7. 5 fear foods? Pizza, pastries, chocolate, cheese, chips


8. do you count calories? I stopped for a bit but I'm back on it


9. what is your max calorie limit? 500 cal. 1000 if I'm having dinner with roommates but only 2x a week.


10. what is your height? 172 cm/,5'8"


11. what is your ultimate goal weight? 119lb, or 129 if Im working out a lot. I don't want to lose my muscle tone. I like being strong af.


12. are you trying to lose weight? Extremely


13. have you ever been called “fat”? Yes


14. have you ever been called “too thin”? Yes and it's amazing


15. what is your current goal weight? 129lb/119lb


16. what was your highest weight? 237.5lb


17. what was your lowest weight? 134lb


18. do you wish you were back at your lowest weight? YES.


19. does your family know about your eating disorder? Yes but I look healthy right now so they aren't worried

20. do your friends know about your eating disorder? My roommate does but no one else


21. do you wish you didn’t have an eating disorder? Of course I do. But it makes for a great distraction from other trauma.


22. have any “free foods”? Veggies like carrots, green peppers, cucumbers I don't calorie count if I have them plain. I don't count olive oil and avocados either since they're good fats and I don't want to scare myself away from eating them.


23. how often do you weigh yourself? About twice a day, morning and night.


24. thinspo or bonespo? Sometimes I have trouble telling the difference but usually Thinspo I think


25. biggest problem area on your body? My calves and face. They're HUGE.


26. favourite part of your body? My veiny hands, my tummy, my butt, my collarbones


27. what kind of results do you want to see? I want a thigh gap so badly, skinny arms that show my muscle, narrow face, tiny waist, easy to fit in an extra small with no squeezing, size 28 jeans and 2 in women's, the validation of judgement, etc.


28. do you purge? Not every day but I do.


29. do you take laxatives? No but I've considered it


30. how often do you purge? Every few days when I binge


31. do you binge? Like a starving man

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32. how long have you fasted for? A week or two. But I was on drugs to be fair.


33. who’s your biggest thinspiration? Winona Rider in Girl Interupted. This hot butch girl on tiktok.

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34. favourite eating disorder movie/show/documentary? Starving in Suburbia


35. favourite thinspo picture? The one that's my background photo.


36. can you post a photo of yourself/your body?


37. how does your eating disorder affect your life? I hate socializing and won't have sex


38. what is your BMI? It's like 24 right now 💀


39. do you follow a diet? The A.I.T Diet (Ana in Training)


40. least favourite part about your eating disorder? My massive fluctuation in weight makes me feel out of control. I can't enjoy normal things whether I eat them or not.


41. has your eating disorder ruined any relationships? no, I don't date


42. do you have a “guilty pleasure” food? Chocolate and fast food, I have to keep away from it


43. meanspo or sweetspo? Sweetspo, meanspo just makes me binge and hate myself. Taking care of myself and doing self care makes me want to be healthy.


44. does anyone else in your life have an eating disorder? A girl in my class and my mom


45. ever been inpatient? Every day of my life


46. ever been outpatient? No


47. ever been in residential care? No


48. ever been in a psych ward? Yes


49. are you currently in therapy? No


50. what did you eat today? Binged on Pizza, then stopped and had some popcorn and veggies with dip as a midnight snack


51. are you scared about the holidays? No, it's February and nobody cares about me lol


52. are your family/friends supportive? They literally don't care lol


53. have any other mental illnesses? Massive PTSD is my worst diagnosis, then bipolar 2, then generalized anxiety disorder.


54. looking for ana buddies? YES PLEASE but only long term anas who've lost weight, no beginners pls


55. what is your current weight? 155 lb

#thinspo phone background

[geekywolf]

This just in: genz is viciously attacking the poor millennials although no genz has heard about that and no, genz is not trying to start a culture war, because a few teenagers on the tok™ don't represent the whole generation

#Yes this is about cheugy #I just learned about it on a boomer/genx show #Genz has no idea what we're doing but we're definitely not coming up with tHIs #Buzzfeed needs to stop please or it will end up being millennials' fox news #Millennials what are you guys doing #Shouldn't you focus on other things? And not think too hard about what the overhyped teenager on tiktok says? #cheugy #I just saw someone post on Instagram that cheugy is deeply misogynistic? #Because skinny jeans aren't in anymore? #And it's also connected to consumerism? #I don't think it's that deep? #Some people just don't like certain trends anymore? #Which is okay because that's what happens with trends? #I really don't see how calling something cheugy is directly misogynistic? #The world gets more confusing every day #and that's alright #this post brought to you by #Procrastination #yey #gen z vs millenials #gen z experience #gen z thoughts #millennials #You people confuse me