#Beatrice Baudelaire

[roseofcards90]

#characters who haunt the narrative my beloved #caleb wittebane #evelyn clawthorne #beatrice baudelaire #satoshi houjou #ouka furude #sayo yasuda #dess holiday #w.d. gaster #mari (omori) #klint van zieks #guizhong #gregory edgeworth #kugie kizuchi #persona 3 #mother 3 #princess tutu #9 hours 9 persons 9 doors #aitsf #mdzs #nitw #knives out #glass onion #there’s more here I just can’t think of them rn 😭 #my posts

[thesorrowoflizards]

#asoue #a series of unfortunate events #lemony snicket #beatrice baudelaire #sorry for omitting a few i could now include two more ubt still not all of them

[jumbleddufus]

I swear it's always "I love you so much!" but never

"I will love you with no regard to the actions of our enemies or the jealousies of actors. I will love you with no regard to the outrage of certain parents or the boredom of certain friends. I will love you no matter what is served in the world's cafeterias or what game is played at each and every recess. I will love you no matter how many fire drills we are all forced to endure, and no matter what is drawn upon the blackboard in a blurring, boring chalk. I will love you no matter how many mistakes I make when trying to divide fractions, and no matter how difficult is it to memorize the periodic table. I will love you no matter what your locker combination was, or how you decide to spend your time during study hall. I will love you no matter how your soccer team performed in the tournament or how many stains I received on my cheerleading uniform.

I will love you if I never see you again, and I will love you if I see you next Tuesday. I will love you if you cut your hair and I will love you if you cut the hair of others. I will love you if abandon your baticeering and I will love you if you retire from the theatre to take up some other, less dangerous occupation. I will love you if you drop your raincoat on the floor instead of hanging it up and I will love you if you betray your father. I will love you even if you announce that the poetry of Edgar Guest is the best in the world and even if you announce that the work of Zilpha Keatley Snyder is unbearably tedious. I will love you if you abandon the theremin and take up the harmonica and I will love you if you donate your marmosets to the zoo and your tree frogs to M. I will love you as the starfish loves a coral reef and as kudzu loves trees, even if the oceans turn to sawdust and the trees fall in the forest without anyone around to hear them. I will love you as the pesto loves the fettuccini and and as the horseradish loves the miyagi, as the tempura loves the the ikura and the pepperoni loves the pizza. I will love you as the manatee loves the head of lettuce and as the dark spot loves the leopard, as the leech loves the ankle of a wader and as a corpse loves the beak of the vulture. I will love you as the doctor loves his sickest patient and a lake loves its thirstiest swimmer.

I will love you as the beard loves the chin, and the crumbs love the beard, and the damp napkin loves the crumbs, and the precious document loves the dampness of the napkin, and the squinting eye of the reader loves the smudged print of the document, and the tears of sadness love the squinting eye as it misreads what is written.

I will love you as the iceberg loves the ship, and the passengers love the lifeboat, and the lifeboat loves the teeth of the sperm whale, and the sperm wale loves the flavor of naval uniforms.

I will love you as a child loves to overhear the conversations of their parents, and the parents love the sound of their own arguing voices, and as the pen loves to write down the words these voices utter in a notebook for safe keeping.

I will love you as a shingle loves falling off a house on a windy day and striking a grumpy person across the chin, and as an oven loves malfunctioning in the middle of roasting a turkey. I will love you as an airplane loves to fall from a clear blue sky and as an escalator loves to entangle expensive scarves in its mechanism. I will love you as a wet paper towel loves to be crumpled into a ball and thrown at a bathroom ceiling and an eraser loves to leave dust in the hairdos of the people who talk too much. I will love you as a cufflink loves to drop from its shirt and explore the party for itself and as a pair of white gloves loves to slip delicately into the punchbowl. I will love you as a taxi loves the muddy splash of a puddle and as a library loves the patient tick of a clock. I will love you as a thief loves a gallery, and as a crow loves murder, as a cloud loves bats and as a range loves braes. I will love you as misfortune loves orphans, as fire loves innocence, and as justice loves to sit and watch while everything goes wrong. I will love you as a battlefield loves young men and as peppermints love your allergies, and I will love you as the banana peel loves the shoe of a man who was just struck by a falling shingle off a house.

I will love you as a volunteer fire department loves rushing into burning buildings and as burning buildings love to chase them back out, and as a parachute loves to leave a blimp, and as a blimp loves to chase after it.

I will love you as a dagger loves a certain person's back, and as a certain person loves to wear dagger proof tunics, and as a dagger proof tunic loves to go to a certain dry cleaning facility, and how a certain employee of a dry cleaning facility loves to stay up late with a pair binoculars, watching a dagger factory for hours in the hopes of catching a burglar, and as a burglar loves sneaking up behind people with binoculars, suddenly realizing that she has left her dagger at home.

I will love you as a drawer loves a secret compartment, and as a secret compartment loves a secret, and as a secret loves to make a person gasp, and as a gasping person loves a glass of brandy to calm their nerves, and as a glass of brandy loves to shatter on the floor, and as a noise of a glass shattering loves to make someone else gasp, and as someone else gasping loves a nearby desk to lean against, even if leaning against it presses a lever that loves to open a drawer and reveal a secret compartment. I will love you until all such compartments are discovered and opened, and until all the secrets have gone gasping out into the world.

I will love you until all the codes and hearts have been broken and until every anagram and egg has been unscrambled. I will love you until every fire is extinguished and until every home is rebuilt from the handsomest and most susceptible of woods, and until every criminal is handcuffed by the laziest policeman. I will love you until M. hates snakes and J. hates grammar, and I will love you until C. realizes that S. is not worthy of his love and N. realizes he is not worthy of V. I will love you until the bird hates the nest and the worm hates the apple, and until the apple hates the tree and the tree hates the nest, although honestly, I cannot imagine that last occurrence no matter how hard I try.

I will love you as we grow older, which has just happened, and has happened again, and happened several days ago, continuously, and then several years before that, and will continue to happen as the spinning hands of every clock and the flipping pages of every calendar mark the passage of time, except for the clocks that people have forgotten to wind and the calendars that people have forgotten to place in a highly visible area. I will love you as we find ourselves farther and farther from one another, where once we were so close that we could slip the curved straw, and that long, slender spoon, between our lips and fingers respectively. I will love you as the chances of us running into each other slip from slim to zero, and until your face is fogged by a distant memory, and your memory faced by distant fog, and your fog memorized by a distant face, and your distance distanced by the memorized memory of a foggy fog. I will love you no matter where you go and who you see, no matter where you avoid and who you don't see, and no matter who sees you avoiding where you go. I will love you no matter what happens to you, and no matter how I discover what happens to you, and no matter what happens to me as I discover this, and no matter how I am discovered after what happens to me, happens to you as I am discovering this. I will love you if you don't marry me. I will love you if you marry someone else—your co-star perhaps, or Y., or even Q. or anyone Z. through A., even R. although sadly I think it will be quite some time before two woman can be allowed to marry—and I will love you if you have a child, and I will love you if you have two children, or three children, or even more, although I personally think three is plenty, and I will love you if you never marry at all and never have children, and spend your years wishing you had married me after all, and I must say that on late, cold nights I prefer this scenario out of all the scenarios I have mentioned.

That Beatrice, is how I will love you even as the world goes on its wicked way. Always. Continuously. With increasing apprehension, and decreasing hope."

#me realizing that i will never be loved the way lemony loves beatrice #me and who fr #lemony snicket #beatrice baudelaire #the beatrice letters #a series of unfortunate events #asoue #long post #faves #jumbleddufus rambles

[aseriesofunfortunatetexts]

asoue + tumblr

#the Kit one is book canon obviously #*grumbling* damn you Barry #lemony snicket #beatrice baudelaire #count olaf #ernest denouement #esmé squalor #kit snicket #a series of unfortunate events #asoue #asoue edit #text post meme

[unfortunatetheorist]

Is Lemony's Kind Editor in the Netflix series?

Throughout the Netflix series, Lemony has used one of his infamous literary devices which I did not notice until rewatching it for the billionth time, when I was working on The Complete Works of Contradictory Logic in ASOUE. More on that to come.

Lemony uses a rather basic device which, I believe, can actually have an ENTIRELY radical new view on the show: Lemony speaks to the camera in the second person.

This just means he uses the pronouns 'you' and 'your', etc, when talking directly to camera.

e.g. TMM: "You could pretend the Duchess of Winnipeg had arrived, and had come to throw the Baudelaires a pony party at her chateau."

However, the 'you' could refer to Lemony's Unnamed Kind Editor. There are some points which back this up:

The Kind Editor is someone who does not know the story of the Baudelaires, they only know Lemony. This is why Lemony is the one to tell them the story of ASOUE.

The Kind Editor is NOT a member of V.F.D. This is why Lemony has to explain [either himself or via other characters] different V.F.D-related things that a member would've already known.

This logic can lead to the following:

Lemony is talking to his Kind Editor, who is filming VIDEO evidence to be used in court when Lemony clears his name and the names of the Baudelaires.

This means that the characters do not physically appear in ASOUE, but rather Lemony just imagines them saying the same words before actually saying them himself. This carries on from the idea (@snicketstrange) that Lemony used the Baudelaires' notes from An Incomplete History (series) or A Series of Unfortunate Events (book canon).

In TCC, the Baudelaires discover the SAME THING filmed by the SAME PERSON - but for ATWQ. Hence the reference to 'Stain'd-by-the-Sea'...

So what's the point?

THEORY: Lemony is using typewritten and video evidence, as filmed by his Kind Editor, in order to clear the names of all 4 people; the Baudelaires and himself.

But who is this mysterious Kind Editor? Many have suggested it to be Moxie Mallahan, as she was only friends with Lemony and no-one else from V.F.D.

However, given the circumstances described, I now present an alternative solution: Beatrice Baudelaire II.

In TBL, Beatrice II is 10 years old, capable of handling a camera. It provides an uncle-niece bonding opportunity for Lemony, and Beatrice gets to know the story of her adoptive parents (from her biological uncle).

Lemony is Beatrice's only hope of finding the Baudelaires, and Beatrice is Lemony's only hope of clearing the Baudelaires' names, as Lemony knows 100% that Beatrice is not an enemy or a spy of any kind.

¬ Th3r3534rch1ngr4ph, Unfortunate Theorist/Snicketologist

#asoue #vfd #lemony snicket #a series of unfortunate events #snicketverse #asoue netflix #theory #kind editor #beatrice baudelaire #beatrice baudelaire ii #tbl #the beatrice letters #an incomplete history #duchess of winnipeg #duchess r #duchess ramona #ramona quimby

[free-my-boy-grumbot]

asoue text posts (part 2 is up check the tag)

#also making this made me realise #o lucafont is an anagram of count olaf #asoue text posts #asoue #a series of unfortunate events #snicketverse #lemony snicket #count olaf #esme squalor #beatrice baudelaire #shirley st ives #georgina orwell #lucafont #henchperson of indeterminate gender #woo i’m famous

[miszmal]

child/preteen-aged beatrice wearing a frog-themed outfit? idk it just appeared in my head at the exact second i saw you were looking for art prompts, so-

oh, or also b&o with black nail polish, half of which is spilled everywhere, half of which is being used to paint their nails with.

i'm obsessed with your art by the way. have a nice train ride!

i always imagined olaf as having a secondary role backstage on costumes in the vfd theatre productions. based on this image

B: This is pretty garish, even for you, O. Garish means 'tacky', by the way.

O: Take your big words to the idiot that chose to put on Beatrix Potter, B.

#i do really like the second prompt #ill get to it another time! #beatrice baudelaire #count olaf #asoue #sugarbowl gen #digital art #vfd #vfd theater kids who practically grew up together

[alfuncoots]

#count olaf #beatrice baudelaire #asoue #a series of unfortunate events #o #b #revelations. realisations. epiphany

[fanonical]

#A Series of Unfortunate Events #ASOUE #VFD #Lemony Snicket #Beatrice Baudelaire

[drowninginredink]

So the whole thing about Beatrice writing a 200 page book to Lemony explaining why they couldn't be together has always lived rent free in my head. But I just realized. Of course the woman who did that was in love with the man who wrote that really long love letter we all love to quote from "The Beatrice Letters." They both love long correspondence. Truly, Beatrice and Lemony were made for each other.

#a series of unfortunate events #asoue #lemony snicket #beatrice baudelaire #snicketverse

[garfrigerator]

will never get over how the most heart breaking, gut wrenching, toe curling, romantic love letter is in the kids section

#examples in rbs #also mad the show kinda butchered it #asoue #a series of unfortunate events #lemony snicket #asoue books #asoue fandom #beatrice baudelaire #the beatrice letters

[hauntthenarrative]

Haunting the Narrative Round 3 Side B

Haunting the narrative means that the character’s absence heavily impacts the plot. They’re not present or active in the story when their influence is most strongly felt, whether they’re alive or dead!

#haunting the narrative tournament #polls #round 3 #side b #twin peaks #twin peaks spoilers #a series of unfortunate events #asoue #asoue spoilers #laura palmer #beatrice baudelaire

[buglover77]

Do you ever think about how Lemony and Bea II are essentially the sole survivors of the entirety of the series. Do you ever think about how Lemony is ultimately the one who haunts the narrative, not Beatrice. Beatrice was dead from the beginning…but so was everyone else. It’s Lemony who is stuck on the other side. It’s Lemony who is a ghost in this world…and other than Bea…completely alone.

#I mean no wonder he’s so wet cat sad little meow meow #lemony snicket #a series of unfortunate events #daniel handler #beatrice baudelaire #beatrice II #Bea Baudelaire #the beatrice letters #Spoilers #asoue #all the wrong questions #atwq #vfd

[aseriesofunfortunatetexts]

asoue + reductress

#beatrice baudelaire #lemony snicket #jacques snicket #olivia caliban #count olaf #esmé squalor #jerome squalor #a series of unfortunate events #asoue #asoue edit #reductress

[snckt]

there is a certain thrill to wearing a disguise — a thrill that is half excitement and half danger. i once attended one of the famed masked balls hosted by the duchess of winnipeg, and it was one of the most exciting and dangerous evenings of my life.

@asouefanworkevent day five of woevember : the masked ball, alternatively titled,   the dragonfly.

#woevember #asoueedit #a series of unfortunate events #beatrice baudelaire #bertrand baudelaire #the premise for this piece was 'pov : you're legally dead but your lover locks eyes with you from across the ballroom' #exciting and deadly indeed ahahaha #series . asoue #laineysedit #character . beatrice baudelaire #the ruby ring makes a reappearance ! and i chose her dress based on netfl*x's opera night . i thought it went nicely with her mask 💕

[snicketstrange]

Solving the Apparent Plot Hole in SB of Netflix's ASOUE

The mystery of Esmé's sugar bowl in Netflix's "A Series of Unfortunate Events" is an endless source of speculation among fans. Kit Snicket's claim that the sugar bowl contains "sugar" that can cure the disease caused by the MM fungus has upset many, and for good reason:

The cure for the MM fungus was originally discovered by Beatrice Baudelaire, who used a hybrid apple and horseradish in her experiments. Nothing suggests that she would give special status to the resulting "sugar."

Count Olaf also seeks the sugar bowl, but he explicitly states in the TGG adaptation that he believed the MM fungus no longer existed. So why would he seek a cure for a disease he thought had been eradicated?

Horseradish alone is already highly effective in preventing death caused by the MM fungus. Sunny was infected, used horseradish, and showed no side effects or traces of the disease. This makes the definitive cure for the disease less valuable than one might think.

In truth, the only way to view Netflix's ASOUE canon as coherent is to accept the fact that Kit Snicket wasn't entirely honest about the sugar bowl's contents.

So, can we deduce what's really in Netflix's sugar bowl based on the information we have?

In Netflix's "A Series of Unfortunate Events" series, various clues are given about the mysterious contents of the sugar bowl. First, the contents are edible, evidenced by a flashback where Esmé uses the sugar bowl's contents to make tea. This same scene also reveals that the tea tasted bitter, suggesting the bitter nature of the contents. Beatrice, also present in this flashback, hints that the contents have some sort of power, adding that this power shouldn't be in the hands of one person but could be shared with many. Additionally, the contents are tangible: Quigley looks inside the sugar bowl and sees something he can't fully understand but is definitely there. Lastly, Kit Snicket, known for telling half-truths and omitting information, claims the sugar bowl contains "sugar" that cures the fatal MM fungus disease. This information, given Kit's history, may only be partially true.

So, how can these contradictions be reconciled? The crux of my theory lies in the idea that the "sugar" inside the sugar bowl is much more than it appears to be.

All signs point to there actually being sugar in the sugar bowl, likely derived from Beatrice's research with the bitter hybrid apple. What we call sugar could really be a remedy. But it can't just be a remedy for the MM fungus disease.

Firstly, Beatrice must have conducted various different experiments while on the island. After all, everything ends up on that island sooner or later. She must have used rare ingredients from shipwrecks or something that accidentally fell into the ocean somewhere to combine with her basic experiment of blending horseradish with apples. After all, the end result contains "something" that is abortive. Neither apples nor horseradish have abortive substances. This suggests that Beatrice used additional ingredients.

(This detail was first brought to my attention by TheAsh , as far as I know) She may not even know exactly what those ingredients are, as labels made of paper could easily dissolve in water.

If, by chance, in one of these experiments, it were possible to produce a unique fruit and a special type of hybrid apple, formed from a very specific formula and rare ingredients (some of which even Beatrice might not know), then maybe we're onto something. If the fruits from a single harvest had the power not just to cure the disease caused by the MM fungus... but perhaps the ability to cure all diseases! And that would be truly hard to replicate elsewhere, even by Beatrice herself.

So we might have something there. This would indeed be a great parallel to the biblical account of the tree of life, to which TE clearly refers (in a somewhat inverted manner, but still a reference). The tree of life in the Garden of Eden could make someone live forever. Beatrice's apple could cure all diseases. But this phenomenon wasn't replicated, and Beatrice knew she couldn't replicate the experiment.

In that case, to prevent the specific apples from losing their properties when they spoil, Beatrice must have made "sugar" from these apples. A type of sugar that preserved the healing properties of the fruit of life. But where would she store it? Indeed, this powder became the most valuable substance in the world.

And so, a safe, discreet (and preferably beautiful) container was needed to hold something so valuable and powerful. Esmé's sugar bowl proved suitable, as it could preserve the sugar even in case of fire and flood.

Esmé, thirsty for power, would love to be the guardian of such a substance. And of course, the sugar bowl is hers. Has she remained so beautiful and youthful over the course of 14 years by consuming a bit of this sugar over the years? Either way, after discussing with Esmé the importance of sharing the sugar bowl's contents with others, she felt obligated to steal it from Esmé.

catastrophist , this theory was for you! I hope you enjoyed reading it.

#asoue #asoue theory #lemony snicket #beatrice baudelaire #a series of unfortunate events #kit snicket #asoue netflix #sugar bowls theory #sugar bowl theory #sugar #sugar bowl