in the past week or so ive seen a lot of people posting about how there's this oversexualization of trans girls on the site, and I gotta agree, there are way too many people (including other trans women!) who act like we're all dtf 24/7 or always super kinky and horny. I've been tired of that stereotype for ages and i am saying this as a rather sexual trans girl myself...
...but I think people are overcorrecting a bit now, and are starting to veer into "trans women shouldnt be talked about sexually / need to be shielded from it" territory. and, to me, that's really dangerous, because outside of some queer spaces - and even within them- the sexuality of trans girls is heavily scrutinized, as is attraction to us. as much as I dislike certain aspects of the memes and jokes that kickstarted the stereotypes, I'm kinda grateful for them as well. girldick jokes helped with my bottom dysphoria, voice kink shit helped me like my voice, and the whole "tgirl tummy tuesday" thing gave me a lot of confidence in my body where I hated it before. I think this open appreciation of trans sexiness has done a lot for both me and others on tumblr.
again, obviously its got its problems - people end up assuming every trans girl is horny, or only spread positivity if its related to sex with us, and of course the people who do have dysphoria from the things that are being sexualized are left out (like those the "girls without dicks are like angels without wings" memes, ugh, feels icky every time). and on the note of comparing tgirls to angels, we also started getting treated like we're ethereal fertility goddesses and that t4t sex was some inherently sacred ritual. spoiler alert, trans girls are normal-ass people and t4t sex can be holy for the participants but its generally a pretty normal thing to do as well
coming back to the "don't sexualize trans girls" posts now, I think they were initially going in the right direction, but at this point I'm starting to raise an eyebrow at more than a few of them. I'm not gonna whip out the "youre a sex hating puritan if you post about it" accusation because that is obviously wrong but again, I think people are definitely overcorrecting and starting to turn this into a (false) dichotomy when it's not. its a complex topic and each individual trans woman will feel differently about it.
(I feel like the internet just erases any nuance in favor of a two-sided, highly polarized flamewar with unrealistic views on both sides. actually i wouldn't even say this is a super-nuanced discussion because its really not that hard to say "fetishization is bad, but so is suppression of sexuality". will this post just end up being a void scream and people will continue drawing lines between one side and the other? probably. but I am a stubborn bitch and I have hope that we can be reasonable.)
anyways I'll close this off by saying that I wrote this between around 1:30 and 2 AM on terrible sleep the night before, that I hope what I said is coherent enough, and that I will keep being a trans girl who is openly sexual, gets horny over other trans women, and is proud to be transsexy as fuck. I will keep being critical of jokes and trends and memes that stereotype us, even from our own community. I will keep being angry at how poorly us trans folks are treated with regards to our sex lives, bodies, and relationships between the two. I will keep loving and lusting over trans women without fetishizing them. And I will keep doing all of these til the day I die.
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becca!! i had a thot that’s keeping me awake okay so dbf!bucky really fucking the reader for the first time and he gets carried away and completely overstimulates reader until she just can’t stop coming even if it’s the slightest touch and he taunts her about it the whole time
he’s just like “filthy girl, you just can’t. stop. cumming. huh?” and he punctuates each word with a hard thrust while reader just whimpers because she can’t even talk anymore 😵💫😵💫😵💫
Ooooooh that's really interesting actually! Because maybe all you've managed up until that point is needy, frantic hookups. Quickies that are so damn satisfying but don't allow for much passionate exploration.
So maybe when he actually gets a chance to take his time, it's so different to what you're used to with him. You're familiar with the kind of desperate euphoria that he can give but that's nothing compared to the kind that he's determined to give you now that he has all the time in the world.
The way he could spend hours kissing and nipping at your skin truly takes you apart. The way he seems to get just as much pleasure as you do from the soft touches, your body entirely surrendering to his talented tongue until your thighs are trembling over his shoulder.
By the time he's actually slipping inside you, you're so overstimulated that every inch feels like too much. Your body is fluttering around his, overworked but still somehow desperate for more. "Oh, that's it. Take it, sweetheart." He's lost in the feeling of the slow glide, holding back from letting himself give in entirely.
You're so consumed by the overwhelming feeling as he settles inside you, letting you whimper and sob against his neck. You don't know whether to move your hips or not. It's a strange feeling, being torn between needing more, needing less and needing exactly what you're currently getting.
He pulls back a little, his movements are so slight but they still leave you gasping. "Bucky, please." You beg, your nails digging into his back as he presses back inside you once more.
"So pretty like this. Take it so fucking well." There are tears welling in your eyes, his steady rhythm of shallow trusts driving you wild. The tiny movements are almost worse than the pace you're used to from him because this is totally unrelenting. There's no escape at all from the overstimulation.
"Bucky, I'm gonna cum again. Oh my God, I can't. I can't, please." You whimper, nipping at his earlobe with your teeth.
"You think I'm gonna stop after I hear that? Baby, that's exactly what I'm aiming for here." His voice is low, strained from holding himself back but there's still that lighthearted, sarcastic edge to his tone.
And God, he doesn't stop. He keeps offering that same shallow grind until your eyes are rolling back in your head and your body is tightening around him. "Fuck that's it. Silly little thing like you just can't help yourself. Can't stop cummin' for me, no matter how hard you try." You hardly even register what he's saying but you do register that the thrusts don't falter, even after you're spent.
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I'm not completely done digging around Doppleganger after my initial run but I have a few thoughts on the characters.
I find it interesting that the Huntsman is less of a reflection doppelganger than the other not-Tempus members.
Reflection as in the same but flipped.
Altare is a hero who's always protecting but his doppleganger is a demon king (aka a villain) who is prone to torture. Axel has a heart of gold and deeply cares for the people around him but his doppleganger is fine with discarding, using, and sees nothing wrong with blatantly lying to those around him. Hakka is a generous sweetheart buzzing to be around others but his doppleganger is haughty, stuck up, rude, and selfish. Flayon is a bit tsundere but his self confidence is strong and he is particularly good at understanding many different viewpoints but his doppleganger is clingy, thinks something is wrong with him, and unable to comprehend the reason his master abandoned him (even if ultimately it probably wasn't anything to do with him in the first place). Bettel is considerate, but still an entertainer and goes to lengths to always provide a good and interesting show for the audience but his doppleganger plays for a captive audience with overworked stagehands to fulfil some sort of contract he made.
But the Huntsman? There's not much flipped about him. The most flipped thing is that he's apparently wanted in a bunch of kingdoms. But who knows maybe Shinri was wandering for a similar reason, as far as I know he hasn't dropped much lore beyond surface stuff but I'm also not a loremaster (because I am old and cannot be perpetually online watching everything anymore). Perhaps Huntsman also takes the self sacrifice thing too far, but that's not too out of character for Shinri either. They're both kind, willing to go to great lengths to help others, wanderers, and a bit too used to the loneliness they feel. It's odd that Huntsman is the one character that isn't flipped.
You would think he'd be a cold and calculating person, seeing an opportunity to use the protag to further whatever his goal is. It would make more sense if Huntsman was the one desperate for the keys and to escape the temporary world rather than Regis. Sure Regis wanting the keys makes sense too, demon king and all, but I can also see him content with ruling the Ice Plane and battling it out with Syrios. But Huntsman? He's wracked by loneliness. That sort of isolation drives people to desperate lengths to feel any sort of lasting connection. "Oh but the memory link with Shinri, Kristen! Shinri's experiences and memories must have fixed Huntsman!" Idk I find that too deus ex machina, and why wouldn't that make a twisted version of Shinri even more desperate to escape his world to obtain those experiences for himself?
It's just odd. Maybe I'm overthinking what is a fun project the StarsEN team and the boys whipped up.
But it's also a visual novel. And this genre is always laden with subtext and secrets.
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Where did I go!?
So Tumblr deleted my account for a couple days. But I got it back! (thank the gods)
Moving forward though in case that happens again
I’m going to try and be better at copying prompts into a prompt document on my computer (at least until tumblr starts sending me asks as emails again)
A new GoddessofRoyalty archieve blog that is attached to a different account of mine for all my ramblings and writings to be reblogged to (give me a couple days weeks to get the full backlog over there)
Worse case scenario my twitter is GoddessofRoyal
Oh man I was very stressed for the last few days. But I’m glad to be back.
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