#Andrés will write ''I corrumpted a young man by putting lust in his heart''

[shotgun-cake]

idk why but I just imagined Martín as Crowley and Sergio as Aziraphale from Good Omens (no romance tho), I think it's so funny because they are clearly the so-called demon that's actually just a disaster boy doing the best he can, and an apparent angel that's a real big asshole but because he thinks it's necessary

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I absolutely LOVE this

Thank you so much, anon, for deciding to share this wonderful hot take with me - it warms my heart that you came up with that gem of a headcanon and thought, "who should I throw this at? oh I know, Shotgun, let's see if she catches it..."

And I am ENAMORED with this concept.

With Sergio being an objectively bad angel, with his own skewed morals, but still striving to do good, sometimes with questionable methods.

And Martín, just as incompetent, he gets off on putting lust in the hearts of men, but he won't do anything darker than small temptations, petty crimes. He does it for the thrill, not because he's been asked to.

They both find their job very rewarding, but neither of them plays it by the book. They have a centuries-old rivalry, but don't actually hate each other with a burning passion. Sergio doesn't really see Martín as his Nemesis, that he must defeat at all costs, but more as a mild inconvenience, a persistent thorn on his side. And Martín feels the same about Sergio, not threatened by him, but rather slightly amused. "This fucking guy again? *Tired Sigh* Alright, bring it on, Wings! Let's play..."

PLOT TWIST: Demon!Martín and Angel!Sergio both end up assigned to watch over one Andrés de Fonollosa - apparently an important player in the great game of Humanity™ - and both angel and demon try to sway Andrés to their own side. They infiltrate his life, as friends, and it turns out Martín and Sergio are evenly matched, and seem to have equal influence on Andrés's life, on his choices, on who he is as a person.

They both find Andrés utterly fascinating, he has potential for greatness and for cruelty, and Martín keeps nagging Sergio that Andrés would make a wonderful demon, that the Aesthetic alone suits him so well. Andrés is unlike any human Martín's ever met, he's actually complex, creative and bold. And so unpredictable that he keeps even angels and demons on their toes. Martín is entirely smitten. Sergio calls him out on his blatant lack of professionalism (falling for a human? Gross!) but he hopes he can use it to his advantage to turn Andrés into a Good Person™ (lmao)

One day, Andrés mentions that he sees Sergio as a brother. Of course, Sergio immediately boasts to Martín that he's won, that he made Andrés see the light and that he's the one who has the most power over him. Because "surely Martín, he never saw you as a brother, did he?"

But Martín doesn't bite back, he just smiles at Sergio, safe in the knowledge that Andrés is committing so many sins, the robberies and the violent outbursts, so Martín is clearly the one who has Andrés in his pocket.

Martín also knows for a fact that Andrés is this close to cheating on his wife, that he's corrupted his heart, he just needs to find the right woman to woo Andrés, the final temptation. He prepares the perfect event to make Andrés cross that line, an art gala full of elegant, cultured and beautiful women. But Sergio unexpectedly crashes the party and ruins it all (not fair! turns out Sergio is no stranger to playing dirty either, how rude!) That night, Sergio magically makes all women in attendance appear undesirable to Andrés.

A move that backfires in a spectacular way.

Because as Sergio leaves, confident that he did a wonderful job in there (stellar work Sergio, now we know for sure Andrés isn't cheating on his wife tonight!), it turns out that Martín is the one who catches Andrés's eye that night. Which isn't at all how he planned it, that part was entirely unexpected, and if Martín were to follow the rulebook, well, that's a big no-no, right?

But Martín would be lying if he said he never thought about it, and the biggest thrill of all is that he genuinely wasn't trying to seduce Andrés himself, he might have fallen for him just a little bit (a lot, boy fell hard, even harder than when he fell from heaven), but Martín never acted on his feelings for Andrés, all he ever did was befriend him. The moment Andrés shows interest, however, all bets are off. Martín, in quite the predictable demon fashion, goes "fuck the rules!"

And fuck Andrés ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Martín can just write on his report that he did 'what had to be done', and then some. Such a competent demon, so devoted to the task at hand, in fact, that he did absolutely 'everything in his power' to corrupt Andrés. And he did. He very much did. Employee of the month, that's for sure.

"Turns out you were correct, Sergio. Andrés never saw me as a brother, did he?"

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And... that's all I have on this!

Thanks again for this ask, Anon, I hope you were entertained. I sure was!

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#anon you are Galaxy Braining on this and I'll tell you why #i have in my drafts an outline for a Good Omens AU for Berlermo #probably never gonna write it but it's there #it's been there for a few months taunting me #i did not go in your direction but here's what i have: #Andrés as the overzealous demon with occasional impulses of goodness (rare and shameful) #Martín as the laid-back angel with his own moral compass and who's not scared of playing dirty (claiming it's for the ''greater good'') #Andrés and Martín keep meeting and ''influencing'' the same events and every time when they report back to heaven/hell #they portray the encounter as an unmitigated victory for their own side #Andrés will write ''I corrumpted a young man by putting lust in his heart'' #Martín will write ''I did a Cupid Mission and united a lovely couple'' #(same event but very different takes lmao) #Working Title: ''Conflicting Reports'' #obviously they fall in love #but are both CONVINCED the other is fomenting a ploy for the interest of their own side #then the MINT heist happens and they both infiltrate it as hostages in the hopes of swaying the course of the events #the tension of the confinement paired with their rivalry and pent up desire means they end up boning in one of the vaults #neither of them mentions it in their rapport to heaven/hell #proving at last that this wasn't a ploy at all and that they weren't doing the seducing on behalf of their ''side'' after all #so that's what this was or at least what it was supposed to be (I'll never write this lol) #now YOUR TAKE has me curious and Angel!Sergio versus Demon!Martín is definitely a Sitcom I'd watch!!! #i want some angel versus demon shenanigans with Andrés vaguely in the background #entirely oblivious to the fight between Heaven and Hell currently taking place in his living room #and once Martín and Andrés get together OBVIOUSLY Sergio sticks along #still striving - struggling - to tip the scales and make Andrés a better person #lol i went off didn't i? #i got an ask! #anon #berlermo #shotgun's fanfics 🔫🍰