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#And there's so much love but also sarcasm and danger
angelfic · 8 months
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— THE WAY I LOVED YOU
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pairing: theodore nott x reader
summary: in which theodore nott will do anything to get you to go out with him, but you’re just as stubborn rejecting him
warnings: swearing, kissing, dangerous stunts and theo being stupid (ryan gosling in the notebook style), unedited since i wrote this in the middle of the night on no sleep again lol. enemies to lovers if you squint a bit
author’s note: since everyone loves theo i’ll pretend this isn’t just for my own selfish needs <3 (especially the notebook reference) also surprise surprise mc is a gryffindor as always, you’d never know i was a slytherin my bad guys… as always let me know what u think! enjoy, angels 💌
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The first time Theodore Nott asks you out, you spill a pot of ink directly into his lap.
It’s not like you meant to do it. But when there’s a Transfiguration worksheet to be getting on with, the Slytherin boy seated next to you by Professor McGonagall asking you out would surely take anyone by surprise.
The second you twist in your seat to look at him in shock, your arm slides the pot right off the desk and directly onto his grey trousers, instantly staining them with the black liquid before you have a chance to speak.
Your hands fly to your mouth to stifle your gasp and you look up at him, anticipating an angry glare in return. Instead, he looks mildly surprised at the ever-growing stain on his crotch, but mostly… amused?
“A simple ‘no’ would have sufficed, darling,” he says, raising an eyebrow and suppressing a smile.
You begin stuttering out an apology and scrambling for your wand to wave away the stain before you can do something stupid like attempting to rub it off with your sleeve. Your cheeks instantly heat up at the humiliating image now plaguing your mind and you barely contain a sigh of relief when you realise the lesson has finished.
It’s a miracle your shoes haven’t left scuff marks on the ground in a cartoonish trail with the speed at which you leave the classroom. Godric knows why Theo Nott of all people wants to ask you out, but since it can’t possibly be for any good reason, you’d rather not think about it too much. This, however, isn’t helped by Hermione pestering you about why you look so flustered for the entire walk to the Charms classroom.
Twenty minutes later, her attention is finally diverted. On the other hand, it’s because she’s berating you for accidentally burning the end of her left eyebrow off with a charm gone wrong.
The second time Theo asks you out, there are thankfully no ink pots around.
“Hey,” he whispers from behind you, making you jump within an inch of your life despite his low volume. You swivel in your chair to glare at him, incredulous. Seeing that he’s startled you, Theo grins. “Sorry. What are you doing?”
“Baking a cake,” you deadpan, once your heart has started beating at a normal pace again. Holding up your Potions book, you feel the annoyance start to seep in when Theo continues looking at you, undeterred. “What does it look like I’m doing?”
Apparently unfazed by your sarcasm, he drags out the chair next to you and spins it around to sit on it backwards. Settling his arms on top of the backrest, Theo rests his chin on them to look at you. “You never did answer my question.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you mumble, eyes scanning the page in front of you but taking in nothing. “If you’ll excuse me, I have to study-”
“Are you going to make me ask you again?” he sighs. You panic a little at his bluntness and continue pretending to read, not knowing what else to do. Theo takes your silence as encouragement and shuffles his chair closer to your own. “Go out with me.”
The arrogance practically drips off his voice, and the pit of anxiety in your stomach immediately turns into irritation instead. “No,” you grit out, slamming your potions book shut to scowl at him. “And I don’t hear you asking anything.”
“Okay,” Theo says slowly, nodding as though he understands. It’s clear that he doesn’t though, because the next words out of his mouth have you stunned. “Please, oh please, will you do me the absolute greatest honour of going out with me?”
”Merlin,” you exhale, pinching the bridge of your nose. Dropping your hands into your lap, you see no solution other than gathering your things to return to the common room. “You’re having me on…”
“I can assure you, I’m not,” Theo says quickly, stopping you from leaving by gently grabbing your elbow. You stop in your movements to catch him looking more unsure than you’ve ever seen, and you’ve never been more perplexed. “I’m completely serious right now. Go out with me?”
“Wh- I don’t even-” you sigh, cutting your senseless muttering off to cross your arms over your textbook. “Whatever happened to a simple ‘no’ sufficing, darling? Aren’t there a million other girls for you to go and pester? Godric knows you’ve got an entourage following you half the- What are you looking at?”
Amazingly, Theo’s expression has lost all trace of vulnerability and now displays a slightly faraway look, his signature lazy grin in full effect. “Sorry, I didn’t hear a word after you called me ‘darling’.”
Resisting the urge to hit him over the head with your textbook, you take a deep breath and grasp the potential weapon tighter in your hands before speaking. “As hard as it is for me to believe that girls actually fall for this rubbish, your history with them shows that they do. Don’t think for a second, I’m going to let you use me like they do.”
Theo considers your words for a few seconds, mulling them over as carefully as though he’s trying to solve a brain teaser. Eventually, he seems to come to a satisfying conclusion, because he tucks his hands into the pockets of his trousers and tilts his head. “So you need me to prove I’m serious about this… and then you’ll say yes?”
“Oh, for the love of-” Huffing, you turn on your heal without saying another word and storm out of the library. Theo doesn’t follow you, allowing you to clear your head and think about the incredibly odd interaction.
You’re climbing through the portrait hole into the Gryffindor common room when you realise you never actually refuted Theo and his theory to make you go out with him. Whether or not it was on purpose, you can’t quite decide.
Over the next few weeks, you start wishing you had stopped Theo before he could start trying to prove himself to you.
You can’t go a single day without the question of going out with him popping up. Much to your bewilderment, it isn’t always him asking. Sometimes it’s his friends, sometimes it’s students at the Gryffindor table who are sick of the multiple owls every morning flocking to your table with a note in their beaks. Sometimes it’s even your friends.
“I mean, really,” Hermione says at breakfast, huffy as always when reprimanding someone. “It’d be benefiting everyone if you just went out with him. Why don’t you, anyway?”
“He’s a Slytherin,” Ron butts in, talking to Hermione as though he’s explaining something to a child. He takes a gigantic bite of his toast before speaking, his next words coming out muffled. “Surely that’s reason enough.”
“No, that isn’t reason enough,” Hermione says sternly, furrowing her brows. “A good reason would have been all the girls he’s always with. Of course, that’s flown out the window recently. He’s also never given them as much attention now that I think about it.”
“He’s definitely not the worst of the group either,” Harry adds, leaning in as nosily as Ron. “Not like we’re talking about Malfoy…”
“Don’t you two have Quidditch tactics to be discussing?” you snap, exhausted by the subject already. The two boys hold up their hands in surrender, before shuffling down the bench. Whether that’s to be closer to the Quidditch team, or to get away from you before you start throwing hexes - you aren’t certain.
The fact you’re awake early in the morning on a Saturday isn’t helping your sour mood, and the Quidditch match being between Gryffindor and Slytherin only adds to this.
“We’d better go and get a good seat at the front, so we aren’t on our tiptoes for the whole game like last time,” Hermione says, already sliding off the bench. You give your cup of coffee one last longing look before you allow yourself to be dragged away.
You haven’t even made it onto the Quidditch pitch before you’re already wishing for that cup of coffee to give you strength, because you find none other than Theo standing outside the Great Hall in his green and silver Quidditch robes.
As soon as he spots you, Theo plasters on that charming smile of his and opens his mouth, no doubt to ask you if you could talk privately.
Hermione interjects before he gets the chance. “Don’t bother, I’m leaving.” She simply sighs when you look at her, betrayed. “He’d have convinced you anyway! I’ll save you a seat.”
You watch her leave, helplessly before turning to Theo and crossing your arms. “Yes?”
“I have a proposition for you,” he says simply, getting to the point. The proposition has, without a doubt, got something to do with you and him and a trip to Hogsmeade, but you gesture for him to continue nonetheless. You can’t deny it’s been entertaining watching Theo come up with new ways to ask you out these past few weeks. “I’ll throw the match and let your lot win if you go out with me.”
This startles a laugh out of you, something between a chortle and a gasp. “Oh, you cheeky bastard,” you exclaim, but you can’t help grinning. That was quite possibly the last thing you expected him to say. “First of all, I think my lot is perfectly capable of winning on their own. And secondly… as funny as it would be, I’d rather not have your death and Malfoy’s subsequent imprisonment in Azkaban be on my conscience.”
You only realise just how wide your smile is when it starts to fade under Theo’s unwavering gaze. His lips twitch up into a smile and you immediately frown as an automatic response. “Why are you looking at me like that?”
“You’re bantering with me,” Theo says, grinning as though he’s extremely pleased with himself. You realise with a jolt, that yes you were bantering. “One step closer to agreeing to go out with me.”
“That’s not happening,” you protest, but it sounds fairly weak, even to you. “Like I keep telling you, I’m not going to be one of those girls.”
Theo shrugs. “And I think you already know you’re not one of those girls. It’s fine, I can wait.”
The relaxed manner in which he says this has you flabbergasted to say the least. Truthfully, you aren’t completely sure why you haven’t just agreed at this point. No one in the whole school is used to witnessing such extravagant displays from Theodore Nott, so you’ve accepted the fact you’re an outlier in this particular subject area. You’re starting to think Hermione’s right, and it’s pure stubbornness that’s keeping you going.
“You’ll be waiting a long time then,” you say, giving Theo a bland smile.
“Nah,” is all he says, the smile still gracing his unperturbed face. “Keep an eye out for me in the Quidditch stands.”
Theo winks at you before walking away in the direction of the pitch and you linger in the castle for a good few minutes before snapping out of it and walking in the same direction.
You find Hermione quickly at the front of the Gryffindor stand and you’re about to ask how long until the game starts when Lee Jordan’s voice begins to boom from the commentator stand.
“Strong start for Gryffindor with Katie Bell taking the Quaffle and- nope, Vaisey’s taken it and passed it onto Urquhart, his fellow Chaser and the new Slytherin captain.” You’re thankful for Lee’s commentary as it’s easy to follow and you probably wouldn’t have a clue if it weren’t for him. Surprisingly, he keeps it professional enough for a while. “Ginny Weasley tries to take the Quaffle after a near hit there to Urquhart, thanks to new Gryffindor Beater Jimmy Peakes and that very solid Bludger over there. Unfortunately, he missed-”
“JORDAN.”
“Sorry, Professor McGonagall, I meant fortunately. Slytherin Chaser Mattheo Riddle now has the Quaffle and seems to be aiming to score and- oops! He’s missed, thanks to Gryffindor Keeper Ron Weasley. Good on you, Weasley,” Lee says, unable to be impartial as shown by McGonagall’s glare. “As for the Slytherin Keeper, Nott seems to be distracted by something in the Gryffindor stands. Or should I say someone.”
Laughter echoes in every stand, much to your utter humiliation and some people even start whooping and cheering in your direction. Theo’s antics are common knowledge at this point, but it doesn’t make the laughter any less embarrassing. You try and maintain a shred of dignity by standing still and glaring as hard as you can at Theo. Horrifyingly, he starts to fly in your direction.
Lee looks at McGonagall before speaking, but she merely shrugs helplessly, looking flustered herself. “Er, well it seems Slytherin are open for Gryffindor to score. No one seems to be taking advantage, however, as I think I can speak for everyone when I say we want to know what’s going on with Nott and Y/N.”
Glancing at the others, you realise Lee is right and all the players are hovering in place, making no move to continue the game. They look partly confused, but mostly nosy.
Theo stops just outside the Gryffindor stand, his attention focused wholly on you. You raise both eyebrows in question, waiting for him to speak. “Go out with me.”
“Unfortunately, I can’t quite hear what Nott is saying, but I think we can all guess he’s asking her out again,” Lee says, causing a few more cheers and even a couple groans. “Take the hint, mate.”
“Theo, get back to the game!” you hiss, wrapping your arms around you as if it’ll shield you from everyone’s eyes. “You’re embarrassing m- What the fuck are you doing!”
Theo swings a leg over the side of his broomstick so that he’s sitting completely facing you, legs dangling dangerously off one side. Lee sits up a little in his booth and McGonagall looks positively horrified. “For unknown reasons, Nott is balancing precariously in a position no Quidditch player wants to- Merlin, he’s hanging off his broomstick!”
Everyone in the crowd screams and shouts when Theo slips off his broomstick, but they quieten down and watch with fright when they see he’s still holding on with both hands. You think you’re going to faint.
“Theo,” you plead, with the same voice you’d use to coax a bloody kitten out of a tree. “Get back on your broomstick. Please.”
“Only if you go out with me,” Theo says, eyes determined despite breathing a little heavier. The broomstick is thin and despite his strength, it’d be hard for anyone to maintain a grip for long. “Say you’ll go out with me and I’ll get back on.”
“Just say it!” Hermione grabs you by the shoulder to shake you.
Professor McGonagall seems to have shaken out of her previous daze and begins scrambling around for her wand while Lee narrows his eyes to better assess the situation. “Godric, Y/N. Just say ‘yes’ and end everyone’s misery already.”
“But…” you trail off, hands shaking as you keep your eyes on Theo’s white knuckles still gripping the broom. “I don’t want to encourage this stupid behaviour.”
Theo rolls his eyes as though he can’t believe you’re still objecting. He shakes his head at you, though his chest is shaking with laughter. “Go out with me, and I swear I’ll never do anything stupid again. Fucking hell, I’ll quit Quidditch altogether if you want.”
You open your mouth to say something, you’re not sure what, but before you can get a word out, Seamus Finnigan pipes up from beside you. “Personally, I say let him fall off the bloody thing.”
Tutting, you turn to Theo just to find the idiot raising an eyebrow challengingly. His left hand begins to loosen on the broomstick, deliberately.
“Theo, don’t you dare.”
He drops his left hand completely and you scream, the noise drowned out by everyone else’s yells.
“OKAY!” you yelp, heart in throat as you watch Theo dangling from his broomstick with one hand, clearly struggling. “Okay, I’ll go out with you, you stubborn idiot!”
The Gryffindors that hear you, begin to cheer, setting off the other houses and once McGonagall sees Theo begin to pull himself up on his broomstick, she visibly relaxes, slumping in her seat as she clutches her chest. Lee soon gets the message. “Finally, after a good month of watching Nott pine pathetically, Y/N has agreed to go out with the poor bast- Er, beggar. Sorry, Professor. By the way Nott, you’ve got detention for a week.”
Now sitting normally on his broomstick, Theo grins at you like the cheeky bastard that he is, with elation clear as day on his face. You struggle to fight off your own grin and you can tell by his expression you’re not doing a very good job at it. “Pull something like that again and I’ll push you off your broomstick myself,” you warn him, though it lacks any real threat. You were more worried than angry, and it definitely shows. “Okay?”
“No more stupid behaviour,” Theo promises, sounding sincere as he nods, messy hair falling into his eyes. The wind blows it out of the way almost immediately and you find yourself wanting to do it with your fingers. “After this, though.”
You furrow your brows as Theo flies close enough to the Gryffindor stand to get off his broomstick and hop right into the crowd, landing next to you. Broomstick in hand, Theo doesn’t take his eyes off you when he holds it out to Hermione. “If you don’t mind, Granger.”
Clearly baffled, Hermione gingerly takes the broomstick from him and watches the two of you, as enraptured as the rest of the school.
You face Theo properly, looking up at his eyes to see them glittering with pride and achievement. You tilt your head in question, wondering why he hasn’t yet returned to the game.
Theo answers you by gripping your waist to pull you into a stupidly dramatic, dizzying, wonderful kiss. His lips are soft against your own and cold from the wind, but the shiver that runs down your spine has nothing to do with the temperature and everything to do with the way Theo is pressed against you.
You could go on forever, but the cheers and claps and hollering around you remind you that you’re surrounded by all your peers and, Godric, your teachers.
Pulling away, you clear your throat and attempt to gain back some of your dignity by keeping a serious face. Theo attempts nothing of the sort as he’s still wearing a silly grin. You try and avoid his eyes for the sake of your nerves and you mutter the first thing that comes to mind. “Erm, good luck then. I hope you win.”
This is the wrong thing to say surrounded by your fellow Gryffindors as a few of them boo at you.
Theo rolls his eyes at the dramatics, while you simply scowl, pointedly at Seamus who seems to have boo’ed the loudest. Hermione is beaming at you when she hands Theo back his broomstick, though she also gives a little frown directed at Seamus.
Getting back on his broomstick, Theo hovers near you outside the stand. You lower your voice to a whisper that only he can hear. “I still hope you win.”
Theo shrugs, looking more relaxed than you’ve ever seen him during a Quidditch game. “I’ve already won, darling.”
© angelfic 2023.
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celluloidbroomcloset · 4 months
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"The atmosphere on this ship is fucked. Everyone knows why."
"I don't. Enlighten me."
"Your feelings for Stede—"
This scene has been picked over a lot, but this is the first time I noted the speed with which it happens, including how clearly Ed himself knows what Izzy will say, and has from the moment he walks on deck. It's the culmination of an emotional violence that has been there since the start of Season 1 and that focuses on how and where Ed is allowed to express his feelings.
It's Ed who decides to make the discussion public, and Ed who challenges Izzy to say, out loud, in front of the crew, exactly why Izzy thinks the atmosphere is fucked.
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Ed's acting unhinged a moment before, but as soon as Izzy speaks, he's very present—because he's been pushing for this to happen. The tone of voice he uses when he says, "Enlighten me," is similar to the sarcasm in his voice back in "Discomfort," when he says, "Sounds stressful, Izzy." He's not daring Izzy to say it's about his feelings; he's waiting for him to.
Izzy barely even gets Stede's name out before Ed is nodding and pulling the trigger. It's not at all what Izzy later says—"He took my leg because I dared to mention your fucking name." The exact words are "your feelings for Stede."
In Season 1, Izzy has insisted that his words to Ed about Stede be spoken in private. He never discusses it with anyone in the crew. The only time other people are present for those discussions is when Izzy insists that Ed send Stede to "doggy heaven," and then Fang has an emotional breakdown (and for a good bit of Season 1, Izzy treats Ivan and Fang as an extension of himself). The crew know that Ed is in love with Stede, but Izzy does not speak about that in front of them. Izzy's verbal violence about Stede, and his attacks on Ed about Ed's feelings for Stede, are always out of sight and hearing of the crew.
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But he does speak to Stede's enemies about it, and Ed knows it. Izzy has told Calico Jack that Ed is "shacking up" with Stede. Spanish Jackie also knows, and so do the English, because that's how and why Izzy sold Stede out. Ed is aware, from the moment that Jack uses the term "shacking up," that Izzy has been speaking publicly about Ed's relationship with Stede.
Ed himself does not talk about his romantic or sexual relationships. Other people do—Calico Jack, Anne and Mary, Izzy—but Ed is not public with that information, even saying that “our private lives are our private lives” (echoing Stede’s statement to Jack: “Ed’s past is Ed’s business and I respect that.”). The times when Ed makes his feelings toward Stede known, even implicitly, are private—the “fine things” scene, the kiss on the beach, even the stabbing scene, all are between Ed and Stede. No one else is meant to witness those. After Stede has left him, Ed’s grief and the reasons behind it are clear, but he still conceals it with a song “about someone else.”
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Ed keeps his softer emotions hidden and private, or tries to, because he’s been conditioned to believe that they’re dangerous to have. And they are—Jack makes them the subject of derision, and Ed is explicitly threatened when he makes his love for Stede too publicly visible. Izzy invades his private spaces (his cabin, his personal space) to berate and expose his emotions, mockingly calling Stede Ed’s boyfriend. The discussion of emotions that Ed tries to keep private are always initiated by Izzy, and the discussions are always violent and derisive.
The crew themselves do not know what has led to Ed shooting Izzy. They haven’t seen the escalation of violence and violation, going from emotional violence to physical—and the initial toe-cutting scene is very much Ed invading Izzy’s safe space to enact violence on him, just as Izzy did to him. They haven’t been witness to the threats and the danger that Ed has increasingly experienced and that in part led him to putting on Kraken in the first place.
The shift that happens in “Impossible Birds” is Izzy once again invading Ed’s space, where he’s caressing and then concealing the groom figurine, to prompt the discussion of emotions. What Izzy thinks is a result of him speaking Stede's name and ethos is actually a result of him invoking, again, Ed's emotions about Stede as a way of manipulating him. But this time, Ed is going to make him do it in front of the crew.
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It is, in a sense, an expansion of "the love that dare not speak its name.” If “everyone knows why,” then Izzy is going to have to say it. So the moment on deck is Ed forcing Izzy to publicly expose the things that have been concealed: Ed's private emotions that Izzy has broadcast to his enemies but never to his friends, and the violence that has been attached to those emotions. They're going to "talk it through," but Izzy has made talking it through violent and unsafe. Now what had been private violence is going to be public.
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atarathegreat · 6 months
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Scary Wife Privilages Tokyo Revengers
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Featuring: Kokonoi Hajime, Ken Ryuguji (Draken), Rindou Haitani, Atsushi Sendo (Akkun)
Synopsis: They don't need you to stand up for them, but damn do they love when you get feisty.
It was crazy to you the extent of disrespect that Kokonoi would put up with while you were around. Everyone was aware of how ruthless the man could be, but they were also aware of how he hid it when you were around, and they took advantage of it. You lost count of how many people stopped in with random complaints about whatever Koko had done the previous week.
You lost count, sure, but not your temper.
Another poor soul walked in, anger evident on his face. Kokonoi wasn't any less pissed than you were, but he didn't like to explode when you happened to be with him. Of course, you knew this. You'd seen him strangle a man for information. You rolled your eyes thinking about it: how could he strangle a man in front of you with zero hesitation but he didn't want to get angry?
"Don't." You glared at the fancy suit and tie as he sat in the chair opposite the desk where Koko sat. "Don't say a word if it's negative." your voice was dark, heavy, almost dangerous, "Give your report and leave."
The man stared up at you as you leaned on Kokonoi's chair, "If there are problems then the boss needs to know."
Koko would be lying if he said he wasn't impressed with the way you leaned over his desk, grabbing the man by his tie and jerking him forward. He knew you had a temper but this...this was different. This made him wish he was on the receiving end of your death glare. "Say it then." Your words sent a chill up Koko's spine, "Tell me your complaint."
And for the first time, Koko seen one of his men speechless. You were scaring the hell out of him, even more so than any gun.
"No, ma'am, it's okay..." His underling whimpered. Koko had never heard any of his men whimper. But there it was, the fear in his eyes and a very pathetic whine that came out as he spoke.
Inui and Kenny had been busting their asses all day. They'd fixed bike after bike, crushed their fingers, bruised their legs, and Kenny slammed his head into the shelf holding parts, effectively bringing the whole thing down. Inui had laughed, stating, "You're too damn tall for this little shop!"
You smiled, and your smile could've made the devil himself kneel in terror, "Then give your report and go."
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As they were replacing a whole gas tank for an old rusted up bike, (Kenny knew it would be more use to the customer as scrap, but the man was adamant about getting the poor heap of metal fixed) someone started hitting the bell on the front desk like it was an emergency. Kenny looked up, sharing a look of exhaustion with Inui before they both stood and slowly made their way out.
"Finally!" The woman yelled and slammed her hands on the counter, "You fixed my sons bike and charged him extra! Who do you think you are?"
Inui, who was busy pulling the books for the week, responded before Kenny could, "I'm Inui Seishu, he's Ken Ryuguji."
Inui's sarcasm made the woman angrier, and Kenny, for the very first time, hated that his friends kneejerk reaction to people was dry sarcasm. She started yelling louder, getting on Ken's nerves as he stood and took it. What was he going to do? Him and Inui charged fairly on their work, and this was a woman, Kenny couldn't exactly brawl with her.
"Would you just give me your sons name so I can find what we fixed and how much we charged?" Inui asked dryly, glancing up from the computer.
"No! You're supposed to know this stuff already! Unless you're scamming everyone that comes into this store!" The woman was becoming red in the face, "Scammers! Overpriced mechanics."
A sweet gust of wind carried over Kenny, he didn't have time to groan about someone else coming in before you had analyzed the situation. You'd heard the woman yelling from outside, a plan of action already made and ready to be executed. Inui smiled at you, "Good evening, Y/n."
"Evening, Inui." Both men paused at the calm air in your voice, "What's the problem here?"
You were here, meaning Kenny could relax and let you handle this problem on legs. He smiled and waved at his daughter who was holding your hand tightly, she waved back and giggled when your hand absently rested in her hair. God, how did his day get twenty times better with just a simple little sound?
The woman quickly tried to usher you out of the shop, stopping when you gently shoved her hand away, "You better get your little girl out of here, these scammers-"
"Enough." Your tone was cold, "These men are charging just right for their expertise and parts they replace. Do you understand how much money it costs to order half the parts for a motorcycle?''
Inui piped up quickly, "I don't think she does, Miss Ryuguji. Enlighten her."
Now Kenny was regretting how funny it was that his friend loved instigating you.
"In the last month this shop has spent over 6734610 yen in bike parts, three pieces of which went to your sons bike three days ago. Inui," You looked over at him, "search the name Kyoka. Broken clutch, broken break and an old spark plug."
Everyone waited silently as Inui looked it up. Your daughter pulled her hand free and ran to her dad, whispering to him as he picked her up, "Mommy is real scary right now." Kenny nodded, "Mommy doesn't take this type of shit, does she, baby girl?" The young child giggled, "She said she was gonna have to beat ass when we came in."
Kenny covered his daughters mouth, "Hey, we talked about the swearing, didn't we?"
He didn't have time to get an answer from your daughter because you started yelling back at the older lady, "I don't care if your son used his whole damn paycheck to get his bike fixed. He's in his thirties and doesn't need his mommy to come and bitch about price for him. Go on! Yell some more, because I promise you, I am much louder."
She tucked tail and hurried from the shop, leaving you alone with the two mechanics, "You charged twenty yen over..."
Rindou, while he loved his brother very much, didn't like the man coming over. Ran had a bad habit of flirting with you and Rindou had caught his brother setting his hands on your thighs too many times. He wasn't worried about you falling for the ridiculous antics, you'd always removed Ran's hands promptly but respectfully, he just hated that his brother was encroaching on his wife. Ran could have any woman he wanted, why did he have to go after you?
Inui grinned, "Agree with us in public, huh?"
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"Rin?" You called to him from across your shared bedroom, "I can see the way your eyebrows are moving. What are you thinking?"
He snapped out of his thoughts quickly, looking at the beautiful outfit you were wearing, the way your arms stretched as you struggled with the clasp of your necklace. "Nothing." Rindou muttered, stepping up behind you to grab the ends of the silver chain.
"Have I ever told you that you suck at lying to me?" Your eyes pierced his through the mirror of your vanity. He couldn't hide the small smirk, "You have."
Rindou appreciated the way you called him out so openly, most people were too afraid of him to, but you didn't fear anyone, not even Mikey, and Mikey had held a gun to your throat. "I...Is it bad that I don't want Ran to come over? I love him, but-"
"I think it's a normal reaction when a man keeps trying to seduce your wife." You were nothing if not brutally honest, "I can't say I'm thrilled to have him over, either."
And yet, despite neither of you being excited to see him, you both greeted Ran with smiles and hugs. You, of course, had to peel the older man from your body, chuckling as you stated, "Boundaries, Ran."
Ran knew the extent he could go, and he exploited it. Placing his hands on your lower back, just above your ass where you couldn't protest your boundaries, or grabbing your hand and tugging you away from Rindou at the worst moments. It was getting on Rindou's nerves the more the night went on, to the point that Rin was hanging onto your back and refusing to let you do anything without him. He was acting like a koala, and as much as you loved him, it was getting aggravating having two grown men following you around.
"Enough!" You snapped, scaring the brothers, "Sit down!"
They did, Ran smiling as you finally lost your temper with them. Rindou glared at his brother, kicking him under the table, "This is your fault..."
"Quiet." You sounded like a mother scolding her children, "We're going to set some new rules, okay? Good."
Rindou knew that none of the rules were meant for him, but the tone in your voice was, at the very least, worrying to him. He knew you could strangle Ran, not with pure strength but because Ran would let you, and he didn't want you to get any more pissed.
It might as well have been a brothel. The second you walked in you were slammed with the smell of perfume and expensive fabrics. You'd learned to take headache relief before showing up, and it helped for the most part. The women, Hostess's as your husband called them, were lined up all day. Mostly they stood and watched men walk in and pick another woman to have their fun with before they walked out, half drunk and with their pants undone while the woman spent the next hour getting fixed up.
"And for the love of god, Ran, stop flirting with me! I don't like you!" You huffed, crossing your arms, "I have zero attraction to you, give up. Because if you don't, and I say this heavily, Ran, I will bring out every ounce of Haitani that I have picked up in the last three years and I will sink you to the bottom of the ocean."
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The man who greeted you as you walked in was quick to remove a dark velvet rope, letting you go up the steps to where you knew Atsushi was sitting. But you were greeted with a sight that made you cackle.
Atsushi was sitting in his usual spot on one of the overpriced couches, legs spread wide and his arms resting over the back. He laid his head back to see you, smiling as you walked closer. You stared down at the woman who was crouched between his knees, "I can hear you begging from the doorway. It's pathetic."
Her poorly manicured nails slowly pulled off his knees, her wrongly glossed lips parting as she spoke, "Wh-who are you?"
You moved Atsuhsi's hand to show off his ring, "Take a guess. Tell me-Oh, no, don't get up!" You stopped her from moving from her position, "Tell me, how does it feel to beg for a married man?"
She was silent, staring up at you. You were like the boogey man for the girls who worked, as each one had tried to make themselves Atsushi's favorite.
"Good to see you, babe." Atsushi reached up and held your face, "Come just to see me?"
"Mhm, that was the initial goal." You walked around and sat beside him, grabbing the woman's hands and placing them on Atsushi's thighs, "Now, I want to see something."
The woman looked even more scared as you moved her around, "Did you think you would get away with this, sweetheart? I know these girls share stories of me, so there's no way you didn't hear about me."
"I swear, I didn't know the boss was married...I hadn't heard anything..." She was wide eyed, shaking a little. You laughed, "Come now, Atsu, are your girls hazing each other?"
He shrugged, "You know I don't pay that much attention."
You stood quickly, dragging the woman backwards and bending her painfully over the small table behind her. She gasped, eyes going wider if that was even possible. Atsushi had seen you do this before.
Both your faces were only inches apart, your wide smile would haunt her for days, "Does this hurt you? Can you take more?" She shook her head, muttering out a quiet "no" that made you giggle, "Then know that you can't handle what my husband could do to you. Even if you were just sucking cock, he's too brutal for you to stand. So, please, attempt this again. Do it, sweetheart, on the very, very slim chance he cheats on me, I'll know you won't be walking for a few days while I file divorce."
The doubled threat wasn't lost on Atsushi, who quickly moved to drag you into his lap, "Babe, c'mon, this place needs ladies who work." He sounded calm, but you could see the emotion hidden in his movements. Atsushi didn't want you to even mention divorce ever again, let alone after you threatened his employee.
The woman ran away fast when you waved her off, "Atsu, honey, my love. Don't let me find this again. I might just kill the next bitch."
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Wassssup okay, if you want for something to write you could do Mattheo with the quote “a special place in hell for me? For me personally? Aw wow that is so sweet” like him being sarcastic. Lmao I saw this on a TikTok once anyway ilyyyy have fun writing bub 💛✨
Brewing Tension
pairing - mattheo riddle x fem!reader
warnings - bickering and teasing, use of petnames
a/n - greggy my favourite little flower I love this and I had so much fun writing it
wordcount - 838
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You couldn't deny the rush of excitement every time Mattheo Riddle walked into the classroom. His smug demeanor, coupled with his sharp wit and undeniable charm, drew you in like a moth to a flame. But as attractive as he may be, he was also a huge pain in the ass. Especially if he was your assigned potions partner and seemingly couldn’t care any less about the subject.
It was a typical day in class, the air thick with the scent of potions and brewing ingredients. As Professor Snape droned on about the properties of Wolfsbane potion, you couldn't help but steal glances at Mattheo. His focused expression, the way his brow furrowed in concentration—it was mesmerizing.
But when he caught your eye, his lips curled into a smirk, you quickly averted your gaze, feeling a flush of embarrassment creep up your neck. You hated how easily he could get under your skin, how effortlessly he could turn you into a blushing mess.
As the lesson progressed, tension simmered between you, fueled by a series of snide remarks and sarcastic jabs. You couldn't understand why the curly headed boy insisted on pushing your buttons, why he seemed determined to antagonize you at every turn.
Finally, unable to contain your frustration any longer when he blatantly ignored your instructions to slice the flubberworms instead of crushing them, you spoke up, your voice laced with annoyance. "Do you have to be so insufferable all the time, Riddle?"
Mattheo raised an eyebrow, his smirk widening into a full-fledged grin. "Oh, I'm sorry. Did I hurt your delicate feelings, sweetheart?"
Your jaw clenched at the condescending tone in his voice. "You know what? Forget it. I don't know why I bother."
The tension in the air crackled between you like static electricity, each word adding fuel to the fire of your growing frustration. Mattheo's grin seemed to widen at your irritation, his eyes gleaming dangerously.
"Oh, come on," he taunted, leaning back in his chair with an infuriating nonchalance. "You know you love it when I rile you up."
You scoffed, unable to resist the urge to roll your eyes. "Yeah, because nothing gets me going like your insufferable attitude."
Mattheo's grin only widened more at your retort, his gaze locking with yours in a challenge. "Is that so? Well, forgive me for trying to make class a little more entertaining."
Your frustration boiled over at his flippant response, and before you could stop yourself, the words tumbled out in a rush of anger. "There's a special place in hell reserved for you, Riddle."
For a moment, there was silence, the weight of your words hanging heavy in the air between you. But then, to your surprise, Mattheo's laughter rang out, filling the classroom with its infectious warmth.
"A special place in hell for me?" he repeated, his voice dripping with sarcasm. "For me personally? Aw wow, that is so sweet."
You blinked in confusion, taken aback by his unexpected reaction. "I-I didn't mean..."
But Mattheo waved off your apology with a dismissive gesture, his grin never faltering. "Don't worry about it, pretty girl. I'll be sure to save you a seat right next to me."
You grumbled in embarrassment, cheeks burning at the pet name and the attention of the entire class now directed towards you. But as you turned your attention back to the potion instructions in front of you, you made up your mind to just ignore him being a prick and get your work done.
With a deep breath, you focused on the task at hand. As you carefully sliced the flubberworms according to the instructions, you could feel his eyes on you, watching your every move with a mixture of curiosity and amusement.
And when you finally finished the task, you held up the neatly sliced flubberworms mockingly, meeting Mattheo's gaze with a defiant glare.
"There," you said, your voice tinged with satisfaction. "Done correctly."
Mattheo's smirk faltered for just a moment, surprise flickering in his eyes before he recovered, his grin returning in full force.
"Congratulations," he said, his tone dripping with sarcasm. "You managed to follow basic instructions. Color me impressed."
You scowled at his dismissive tone, mumbling more to yourself than to him. “Something you’re unable to do, apparently.”
As the class continued, you focused on your work, stealing glances at Mattheo when you thought he wasn't looking. Each time, you found him doing the same, his expression unreadable but his eyes betraying a hint of curiosity.
It was a strange dance you and Mattheo were engaged in—bickering one moment, stealing glances the next. But beneath the facade of sarcasm and pride, there was something else brewing between you.
And as the class came to an end and you gathered your belongings, making your way out of the classroom, you couldn't resist one last glance at him. And to your surprise, you found him already looking back at you, a small smile playing at the corners of his lips.
Maybe, just maybe, there was hope for the two of you yet.
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Mattheo Taglist - @slytherinboysappreciation @urmomsgirlfriend1 @remussbitch @nighttimewrites @starsval @gillyweeds @sir-elian @harryslittlebitch @thatblackthorn @gayforyelena @whoreforfictionalmen18 @darkacademicvibes @marauderswhxre @ravenclawprincess33 @sbrn0905 @atadoddinnit @helpimhopelesslyinlove @carav4l @Yhiiil @tristanswildcat @niktwazny303 @themarauderswife7 @moonlightreader649 @sherbysherbsworld @Topguncultleader @ihatemyexs @nat1221 @Thestarlithideout @bath1lda @pinkposttragedy @Allshitsangiggles @mildly-delulu @h3artz4soph @sunasbbie @vcosette @rinalouu @Floswife @ariensversion @agent-tempest @S0urw00lf @TheBiggestNaturalDisaster @pinkestfloyd @xlinxdax0704 @anonymouslyawesome25 @l0v3do11 @Unstablereader @acourtoflostandwanderingstars @catiwinky @wolfstar-marvelsfan @captainstanksblog @istill-dream-ofyou @pinktreee @opheliamalfoy236 @ceehance @andrew-and-flower @aglady13 @slutforfictionalcharacterss @theadventuresofanartist @iamgayforyourmom1501 @feistyfox47 @nat1221 @cas-planet @csmt_m @mrsriddles-blog @the-sylver-dragon @poppysrin @camille-1019 @Laniirackssss @slvtfortheo
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kitixie · 9 months
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Little Girl Gone (pt 2)
Little Girl Gone / T.S. (part 2) 
part three here
Synopsis: You agree to meet up with Tommy for dinner, but when it doesnt go to plan you find yourself in a dangerous situation.
warnings: violence (not extreme, very canon typical), tommy is not nice but i promise it'll make sense later, cursing
word count: 2.4k
taglist: @budugu , please let me know if youd like to be tagged!
information: Thank you all so much for reading, it warms my heart to know someone enjoys my writing! please leave a comment if you have a critique or anything else to say!
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Around 4:30 the following evening, you began to get ready for your dinner with Thomas.
As you brushed and styled your hair, you thought of his strange mannerisms from the night before. He had seemed off towards the end of the conversation, and that was something that never happened, as nothing ever threw Thomas off. Just as the final touches of your hair and makeup came together, you realized the time. You had been so lost in your thoughts and in your indulgent hair care and makeup routine, that you had spent an hour primping and priming. Now only thirty minutes away from Tommy’s arrival, you needed to pick out a dress.
To a man, picking out a dress for dinner may seem like a small task in the grand scheme of his day, but all women know this to be false. First, you pick a dress. Then, you have to pick coordinating stockings, an overcoat, sometimes an undercoat, a bag, gloves, and depending on time of day, a hat. So what most men would deem as a quick process, isn’t a quick process at all. You did happen to be in luck though, as your favorite dress was one of the only items of clothing you’d hung up in your small closet after you moved in. You had your stockings from the night before, and they were a perfect match for your skin tone so that was also an easy choice. You decided to forgo a handbag, as you’d just be going to the Shelby’s, so you wouldn’t need any money. For shoes, you settled on a pair of well-broken-in kitten heels. This outfit was out of your recent rotation, given the odd jobs and such you had been working after your fathers death and mothers disownment, but Tommy always dressed to impress, so you thought you should too. Following that train of thought, you added a pair of your mothers white satin gloves, and awaited his arrival at your place.
6:00 pm
A loud knock sounded through your apartment, and you quickly jumped to open the door. There, in all his glory, stood Thomas Shelby. Looking good as ever in his black suit with a pressed white dress shirt, this time his hat folded in his hands.
“Y/N, you look lovely this evening.”, he remarked, eyes scanning you from head to toe.
“Thank you Tommy, you look handsome, as always,” you blushed, feeling the heat rise to your cheeks.
Tommy smiled, offering his hand to help you out of the door and down the stairs of your apartment. You accepted his hand, loosely holding it in yours, before dropping it to turn around and lock the door of your home.
Once the two of you had made it to Tommy’s car, he opened your door.
“Always the gentleman, aye Tommy?”, you laughed, giving him a soft smile as you stepped into the car and sank down into the passenger seat.
“For you, yes, always.” He nodded, reciprocating your smile, and gently closing the door.
He rounded the car, getting in on his own side and starting the engine up. It gave a sputter, then turned over, allowing him to put it in gear.
“I could take a look at sometime that if you’d like Tommy.” You spoke softly, wanting to offer your help.
“How do you know anything about automobiles? Did you work as a mechanic in your time away, Love?” He joked, a small laugh followed by a toothy smile coming from his mouth.
“Yes, actually. I did.” You said sternly, not appreciating the mans sarcasm.
“And what else did you do in your time away? I suppose you also learned to train horses, or fire a gun?” He joked again, clearly not understanding your short tone of voice.
“One of those I did, the other I am still clueless about. Feel free to guess which.” You stated, now having grown angry at his teasing.
Tommy feigned a sigh, followed by his imitation of a horses neigh. The two of you remained silent for the remainder of the ride to Watery Lane, only for the conversation to be interrupted by Tommy as the two of you pulled up to park in front of the house.
“Just so you know, Arthur and Pol are here as well. They wanted to hear all your stories about your time away as soon as I told them I was bringing you over.” He spoke, his gaze remaining on your face.
“Okay, Tommy.” You spat, still quite upset about the conversation at the beginning of the ride.
Before he could ask any questions, you pulled open the door to the car, getting out. He tried to catch up to you, but you made it to the front door of the Shelby home before he did, and let yourself in the house. Old habits die hard, as they say.
Once inside the home, you surveyed your surroundings. Not much of the decor had changed, a few updated photos here and there, but mostly everything was still in its rightful place. You made your way through the house at a leisurely pace, admiring all the once familiar details that now seemed new. You made your way to the dining room, while Tommy still trailed behind you, watching your every move.
“Oh dear, it is so lovely to see you again! It’s been so long, how are you?” Pol said, quickly rising from her chair to give you a warm, yet firm hug.
“I’ve been good Pol, thank you. How have you been?” You returned, not only as a formality but because you were genuinely interested in her life.
As Pol rattled off her answer, talking about ‘business this’ and ‘this family that’, you noticed Tommy move behind you. He came around to your left side, pulling a chair out. You remained standing, not wanting to sit if that was where he had wanted to sit, but the soft hand on the small of your back encouraged you to take the seat. You briefly nodded up at him and gave a soft smile, then continuing to listen to Pol.
After Pol had placed food for everyone on the table, you all began eating. Someone had made a delicious meal, one of your favorites. You first assumed it was Pol, but when you complemented her, she quickly told you ‘Oh dear, I didn’t make this’ and cast a look at Tommy from across the table. You didn’t put any effort into figuring out what that glance meant, rather you just enjoyed the food and answered their occasional question. The questions weren’t anything to outrageous, until one came tumbling out of Arthur’s mouth.
“So, Y/N, what made you come back to the grand ol’ town of Small Heath?” He said, smiling at his question.
“I, uh,” you swallowed. You had truly hoped no one would ask, but you should’ve expected it. You cursed yourself for not preparing an answer ahead of time.
Your mouth ran dry for a moment as you tried to formulate what to say that would keep you out of the most shit. You didn’t want to blurt out the truth, but they most likely already knew it anyways, they were the Shelby’s after all.
“My mother and I had a disagreement about my…life plan.” You spoke, satisfied with your answer.
“What life plan, dear? What does that mean?” Pol added to the questioning.
“Probably the same life plan that included her learning about cars and horses,” Tommy said under his breath, but not nearly quiet enough, as the entire table heard him.
“Now Thomas, you know women can do what they choose.” Pol reprimanded, giving Tom a stern stare.
“Yes, women can.” He spoke, “but not Y/N.”
“And why not Thomas? Am I not a woman?” You said, letting your fork clank against your plate. He had your full attention now, and not in a good way.
“You are, you’re just…different.” He spoke, his gaze now on you instead of Pol.
You scoffed, and shook your head at him. You couldn’t believe what he was saying. You didn’t recognize the Tommy in front of you, your Tommy, the one from 5 years ago, would have been uncaring about your interests, and glad to have someone be so knowledgeable about certain topics. You just stared at him for a moment, waiting on him to say something, anything, that would explain his previous remarks. But nothing ever came, and when you realized nothing ever would, you stood from the table, thanked Pol and Arthur for the dinner, and headed for the door.
Once outside the Shelby house, now all alone, you began walking. You were initially going to go home, but the dwindling liquor supply in your own cabinets encouraged you to find The Garrison. You walked down the streets, that still held a handful of people, mulling your thoughts. Tommy acted like a real jackass, especially given that he was the one who invited you over. By the time your anger had mostly settled, you reached the doors of The Garrison.
9:00 pm
You’d been sat at the bar of The Garrison for around an hour, and were plenty of drinks deep. You now held no anger towards Tommy; hell, you could barely picture his face in your mind. You hadn’t intended on getting drunk tonight, but the lovely barmaid by the name of Grace had been giving you all your drinks ‘on the house’, and who were you to turn down free alcohol? Especially given how you’d left your purse at home because you were ‘just going to the Shelby’s’.
A loud grunt came from behind you, followed by a man sitting down on the stool next to yours. You gave him a quick glance and nod, not recognizing his face. 
“What’s a pretty lady like you doing at the bar all alone, aye?”, he questioned, breathing his hot, putrid breath into your face. 
“One, I’m not alone. Two, none of your business, aye?” You said, hoping to be forceful enough that he got the hint and left you alone. 
Unfortunately, he did not. The next thing you knew, he had his fat arm wrapped around your waist, pulling you closer to his barstool. 
“Now listen here, little lady,” he breathed, “You can come to the back alley with me on your own will, or I can make you.” He threatened, brandishing a bowie knife from his waist. 
You sat for a moment, considering your options. You knew you definitely were not going into that alley, even if you had to die bloody for it. You quickly came up with a plan in your head, and before you could talk yourself out of it, you acted. 
“Fat chance, ya bastard. Now let me go,” you said loudly, hoping to draw some attention. 
The man laughed at you, and moved his hand up to grab your shoulder, encasing your frame in his large arm. There was no denying he had size on you, but you had speed. And speed always won. You quickly ducked under his arm, knocking your barstool over behind you. You grabbed his wrist as you slipped out of his hold, bringing his hand to the middle of his back. 
“What do ya say now, you piece of shit,” you laughed in his ear. 
Faster than you expected, he ripped his wrist from your hands, and turned to face you. You heard a loud pop, then the feeling of pain registered on your face. The fucker had just backhanded you infront of the entire Garrison. You gave a small chuckle, which spiraled into a full out laugh, leaving the man utterly confused. You turned your eyes up towards him, feigning doe eyes at the man, before you placed both hands on his shoulders. You moved in closer to his body, and before he could realize, you hooked your right leg behind his knee, and shoved his shoulders as hard as you could manage and still stay upright. 
The large man tumbled to the ground, hitting his head on your now discarded barstool. While you had the chance, you snatched the knife from his hands and knelt down on top of his large body. You pressed the edge of his blade against his own neck, feeling a sense of pride swell through you. You had just taken down this very large, muscular man in front of an entire pub. But before you could get any witty remarks out to your fallen opponent, you heard one thing. 
“Y/N, what have you done?” 
Fuck. Tommy had found you, and no less, found you on top of man, with a knife against his throat, in his brothers pub. 
“Y/N, get off of him. Now.” Tommy spoke, his voice sounding closer now. You turned your head to look at him, finally taking your eyes off of the assailant for just a moment. 
Tommy was standing right behind you, with a look similar to what you could assume the wrath of God would look like. He stood poised, with his hands behind his back, peaky hat on top of his head, hiding his eyes. You turned back to look at the fallen man underneath you, seeing his own look of fear on his face. Then you noticed drops of blood splatting onto the man's face. He wasn’t bleeding, you hadn’t cut him, this much you knew. You tossed the knife to the side, far enough away where neither of you could reach it, and felt for your own face. A warm spot of blood came back on your hand; He had cut the corner of your eye open when he backhanded you. You felt angry at first, then ashamed. This man had cut you, and you kept fighting him like a crazed person. Hot tears bubbled at the corners of your eyes, before you climbed off of the man. 
Tommy grabbed you, helping you to stand on your feet. You were still trying to hold back the tears in your eyes while he gently held your chin, looking over your wound. 
“Love, go to the office. Wait for me, I’ll be there soon.” He spoke, softly. 
You mustered a nod, and scuffled your way to the back office, to wait for him. 
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imposterogers · 1 year
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the bruce & alfred dynamic in gotham (2014) is honestly unmatched, and I don’t think any other iteration has touched as much on the complexities of their relationship. like how alfred was forced into a role he wasn’t ready for, going from butler/security to guardian (while trying to navigate being employed by the boy you’re supposed to be raising).  selina kyle saying “he’s just your butler” to which bruce replies “he’s family”. the way they are the most important person in the world to each other. alfred’s pure panic whenever bruce is in danger, bc bruce is his job his child and his life. alfred driving bruce to a child’s house who bullied him, teaching him to use brass knuckles, and threatening the bully himself before offering pizza. bruce having so much of alfred in him as he grows; learning how to fight, how to be the most unassuming but also most dangerous man in the room, the sarcasm and wit, the loyalty. alfred refusing to coddle bruce but also knowing when to be gentle. their difficulty to express affection / love verbally, but always hugging the instant they’re reunited. no one did it like them!!! 
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milquetoast27 · 2 months
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The Emotional Reticence of Holmes and Watson
Sherlock Holmes and John Watson, two shy Victorian men, maneuver their vulnerable feelings of affection for one another in an expertly flawed and human manner crafted by Arthur Conan Doyle. First and foremost, I am examining their use of "my dear Watson" (91 times in the canon) and "my dear Holmes" (14 times).
The first time Holmes ever uses "my dear Watson" in the canon, it's actually in a rather sarcastic tone.
"What is your theory, then, as to those footmarks?" I asked, eagerly, when we had regained the lower room once more. "My dear Watson, try a little analysis yourself," said he, with a touch of impatience. "You know my methods. Apply them, and it will be instructive to compare results." (SIGN)
Note: for The Great Game, this absolutely isn't the first time Holmes has used this phrase, but from the narrative perspective, it is absolutely the first time Conan Doyle put this phrase to paper, which is more relevant to this examination.
Holmes uses this phrase with a touch of exasperation, which even in itself holds some love within it as he encourages his friend to utilise his own beloved methods. And even in this first instance, while Holmes's tone indicates some displeasure, the personal address ensures that it isn't a genuine blow. But the intimacy of "my dear" is quite daunting, isn't it? so Holmes utilises the veil of sarcasm to break the barrier, in the spirit of "look, I've said it now. Now I may go and say it as much as I want."
Oh, and he does. The frequency of 'my dear Watson' slowly builds through the canon and peaks through FINA, HOUN and EMPT. It isn't surprising, considering they hold some of the most critical points in their relationship.
• "My dear Watson, you were born to be a man of action." (HOUN) • "Not for the world, my dear Watson. I am perfectly satisfied with your company if you will tolerate mine." (HOUN) • "Then these are your instructions, and I beg, my dear Watson, that you will obey them to the letter." (FINA) • "My dear Watson, I owe you a thousand apologies. I had no idea that you would be so affected." (EMPT)
It is evident, that it is after this barrier is broken in SIGN, that Holmes feels comfortable to use this address in such a sincere manner. In fact, it is apparent that it is in particularly emotional circumstances that Holmes is more likely to call for Watson through any means at all.
So, how about Watson?
His use of "my dear Holmes" is almost exclusively out of shock or surprise whenever his 'Johnson' claims anything particularly outré. Again, while Watson is in disbelief, and most probably doubtful of Holmes's claims, the personal address softens this blow to say that no real harm is done between them.
• "My dear Holmes," said I, "this is too much." (SCAN) • "My dear Holmes!" "Oh, yes, I did." (SPEC)
The first real instance of Watson using this phrase sincerely is in FINA.
"You are afraid of something?" I asked. "Well, I am." "Of what?" "Of air-guns." "My dear Holmes, what do you mean?"
Holmes is acting more than out of the ordinary to put Watson in some kind of concern and this question comes no doubt more from worry than simple surprise. He even asks again, "but what does it all mean?" which highlights his wish to be by Holmes's side, even in danger.
The first and only instance of a good-hearted affectionate address comes to Holmes in HOUN. However, interestingly, it is only through the written word, in Watson's letters to Holmes from Dartmoor.
• Congratulate me, my dear Holmes, and tell me that I have not disappointed you as an agent. • Such are the adventures of last night, and you must acknowledge, my dear Holmes, that I have done you very well in the matter of a report.
Watson's method of breaking the barrier is to send it remotely through his pen, which is, after all, much less daunting than saying it directly. It is absolutely worth noting that Watson has also used this language when specifically wishing for praise - it shows us that he feels the closest to Holmes when he is able to follow his own methods.
Conan Doyle shows us the ways insecurities and pressures can collaborate with our most earnest and deepest affections. Holmes and Watson aren't perfect beings, but navigate through their web of reticence and inner desires to find an unspoken but profound dialogue between them.
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vrisrezis · 11 months
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If your willing, general romantic hcs for rocket raccoon?
Yay first rocket rqqq ! Pls ask more I love this mf . For the record your a biologically enhanced animal experiment like rocket in all of my rocket x readers unless you guys state otherwise in your rqs. Light spoilers for gotg vol 3, if you know about his past anyways. Even then I don’t greatly spoil his past.
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- Dating rocket can be rather stressful. Though the girls of your little family of misfits are typically fine, quill and drax tend to tease the hell out of your boyfriend. While it can be annoying from time to time, it’s typically funny. Even groot has his own share of light teasing, but it’s really just him saying things outright and being a little too honest.
- also yknow. Getting constantly attacked by people your family happens to piss off also can be stressful at times.
- but all that shit aside, your boyfriend can be rather.. stressful to be with at first. And there’s a lot of shit you have to tolerate when it comes to him.
- you MUST be able to deal with his constant sarcasm and light insults towards you, to be perfectly honest I can’t imagine him with anyone easily hurt or too soft. You have to be a very strong motherfucker to be willing to deal with his shit.
- however, despite his personality he is a tiny bit softer around you and even if it’s not noticeable to you it certainly is to literally everyone else on your shared ship.
- rocket can be difficult to deal with, but so long as you’re patient enough with him he becomes less difficult to be around and a lot softer as time goes by.
- you’ll notice that he insults you a lot less, and they seem less like insults and more like light jokes to make you laugh. Light teasing. But the sarcasm doesn’t ever wither away. Though he’s not as sarcastic with you.
- rocket, over time, is very into physical affection but is not good at admitting it. It takes a very long time for him to become comfortable with you being affectionate physically with him, but once he grows used to it he loves it. He .. won’t ever tell you that but man if he doesn’t make it obvious.
- over time rocket with lightly, lowkey flirt with you, until it just kinda becomes straight up, shameless flirting the longer you are together.
- rocket also becomes bolder as time goes by, initiating or even asking for some affection if he’s feeling particularly needy.
- while he tends to not do this in front of the others, the longer you guys date the more accepting he becomes of pda.
- likes to cuddle a lot, also insists you sleep with him often. Claims it’s in case groot needs something while he’s sleeping so you’re also there but.. you know he just wants to sleep with you lol.
- lets you pet him :) sometimes he purrs when he’s really relaxed
- (will pet you too low key)
- rocket is overprotective often, and very jealous.
- he has many insecurities, so it’s only natural he gets jealous especially if he thinks anyone is into you (most likely not, but still).
- he’s also lost many people, the first friends he ever had, his entire family during the blip, he even lost groot when he first met that family. He’s protective for good reason.
- losing you is his worst fear
- he doesn’t know how to tell you how much you mean to him, so he shows it through making you things, fixing you things, and just… gift giving in general. If he notices you eyeing something for too long, he’s definitely getting it one way or another. Even if it means he has to steal it. Especially if it means he has to steal it.
- likes to listen to you talk while he tinkers with whatever the hell
- he kinda says a lot of offhanded shit that makes it sound like he’s not listening that much, but he’s hanging on your every word
- while shy with a lot of stuff in the beginning of your relationship as time goes by he is quite bold
- holds your hand a lot, likes to just feel your hands in his? It’s easy to drag you in case danger comes, it’s nice to feel your warmth and feel the comfort of you being there. It also helps that physical affection isn’t his go to all the time and it’s not like a huge amount of contact in comparison to hugs. (Not that he minds physical affection with you, though).
- he sucks at apologies, he just makes/tinkers your shit for you to make up for being a jackass. But he will apologize if you two had a serious fight.
- always willing to let go of his ego if it meant you’d forgive him after a serious altercation. But yknow, it would have to be REALLY bad.
- might even make you food as an apology lol very rare since he doesn’t make food for anybody
- likes to kiss you on the cheek a lot, sometimes on the lips but his go to is to kiss your cheek
- he will open up to you, but it takes a very long time. You are the one person he truly trusts and opens up to but it’s usually when he’s having a nightmare or something. He tends to not want to focus on his past, so he doesn’t talk about it. A part of him just wants to forget that was ever his life so as a result doesn’t talk about it to anybody unless he gets a nightmare that reminds him of his torture.
- it also makes it easy that you’re like him and know what he’s been through so, lol.
- hates seeing you cry, will actually beat the shit outta anyone that makes you cry and if he is ever the reason he feels like the biggest asshole in the galaxy
- while it does take him an extremely long time to open up to you, he will encourage you to open up to him. He’s very understanding if it takes you time too, but will be ultimately hurt if you tell the other guardians anything about yourself that he doesn’t know. (Unless you had some history with one of them prior to meeting him cause that would make more sense to him).
- bad at comforting but wants to be the one there for you
- surprise! Rocket actually likes hugging you but you guys never hug because he seems so against it anytime you hug him. He secretly is a big fan
- anytime you compliment him he’s just kinda like “yeah yeah”
- calls you nicknames btw :) “doll” is a favorite one of his. However he also likes classic ones like “babe, baby, hun, honey, sweetie” sometimes even “sweetheart” and likes if you do the same
- nuzzles his face in your neck/chest when he sleeps
- while rocket can be rather selfish at times, he always thinks of you first, or at least tries to. Which is a lot coming from him.
- if you guys had a hammock, he would actually just love lazing around with you two on a hammock
- when you two are sleeping together he’s very cuddly, if you have to get up for any reason at all he starts to growl and tells you not to move
- “rock I have to pee” “not my problem.” “It is going to be when I pee everywhere!” “Ok now you just made it weird.”
- I can imagine before you started dating the two of you were like the bestest of friends lol.
- gets nightmares often about losing you
- tends to.. show off from time to time.. when you first met he showed off how smart he was at making scraps of metal into literal bombs, or how good of a shooter he is, or how good of a pilot he is, etc. he LOVES to show off because he just loves the idea of impressing you
- this also comes from a place of insecurity and just thinking he’s not that great or competent
- yes, he does purr when he’s very relaxed typically when he’s asleep :)
- don’t tell him you heard him tho he will get mad at you for “invading his privacy” lol
- just the biggest softie for you if you give him time and have the patience of a saint
- he’s kinda aware he’s a lot to deal with, and is eternally grateful for your patience and for your love and kindness
- because honestly people being kind to him? Loving him for him? Not something he’s used to. And honestly something he’s scared of, because of how foreign it is to him.
- and also take the fact everyone that ever cared about him has died at some point (like other than nebula, honestly) you can imagine his fear of letting others into his life, especially when he cares about you so much.
- can I just say… boop his nose? He tries not to laugh every goddamn time
- rare moments where rocket is sentimental talking to Peter and is like “idk I just feel happy for some reason” and just looks at you with a lovesick smile and Peter is like… “hmm… wonder why..”
- speaking of Peter he teases the hell outta you two because he genuinely thinks you guys are adorable. Drax does the same. Mantis on occasion, but not as much lol.
- also thor ships you guys too btw <3 like hardcore he is so annoying about y’all LMFAO
- I can imagine y’all playing with eachother like… him just chasing you around on all fours for fun, trying to tackle you to the ground
- kinda reminds him of when he was little, the good times he had, anyway.
- also you taking care of any of his injury’s, no matter how big or small, is cathartic for him. He likes feeling like he doesn’t always have to take care of himself, or be alone. You have his back, you can take care of him for once, you can protect him too. (It certainly helps that the first act of kindness towards him was lyla easing his pain so LOL).
- if he ever has to take care of your injuries, he will. He’s willing to take care of any injury you get, though if he knows it’s not a huge deal he tries not to make it a huge thing. But he tends to.. overreact anyways and gets overprotective and tells you (more like yells at you) to be more careful.
- kinda steals your stuff
- likes an s/o that finds him funny, but also isn’t afraid to call him out on his bullshit even if he finds it annoying in the moment, he grows as a person because of it
- when you guys stay in knowhere together, much more time for cuddles since you have your own space to relax
- also way more space for him to chase you around all over the place lol
- also low key being parents to all the little raccoons rocket now has with him… 😪
- he’s started to accept a lot of your kind gestures as you caring for him and being nice to him, instead of it being charity work or because you pity him for some reason, he still gets grumpy when he sees your gifts in his line of sight tho
- Would probably blame himself if you ever got hurt, but wouldn’t utter a word of it to anyone. Would probably end up telling you though because everytime he’d look at you the guilt would increase. Probably resulting in him not looking at you for awhile until you get him to spill.
- also if he ever thought you were dead (perhaps during the blip) again, blames himself hard and cries A LOT. Holds onto any possessions you may have had that were important to you. He makes it his goal to keep them safe for you. Would also wear your clothes quite a bit. Sometimes when he’s about to go to bed he just smells your clothes, and thinks about how much it smells like you and just cries.
- ANGST ASIDE!!!
- what a lovely guy to be with who loves you unconditionally, truly
629 notes · View notes
ghost-proofbaby · 8 months
Note
I’m so glad you liked the jokes!
(I though they were hilarious because my sense of humor is nothing if not bad dad jokes, puns, and sarcasm. But I can’t even take credit for them because I found them online haha)
For the blurb idk if you intended for me to ask for something specific or not but I kinda just want to see what you’ll come up with if that’s okay? I feel like any idea you had would be better than mine anyway lol. Up to you really on whether or not you already have ideas or need some help. ♥️
the jokes were so so good i loved them truly. my sense of humor is the exact same way. and oh bless your soul for letting my mind run wild. i present to you all an idea that literally sent me feral, in which you've got some new perfumes and eddie is a blind idiot.
warnings: fem!reader, reader is very vaguely described as having hair that is at least shoulder length as well as buying items such as bras perfumes and chapsticks, hints at sexual themes but no actual smut, neck kissing and just good old fashioned kissing happens, eddie is kind of a perv? a little bit? also, not edited (what's new?) minors dni.
wc: 4.1k+ (i got a little carried away)
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“Smell this.” 
The demand is paired with a sudden wrist in Eddie’s face that nearly has him falling off the bed. 
“Excuse me?” 
You and Eddie had been best friends for a while now. Since that first week of freshman year. Eddie, in all his awkward glory, had leaned up from his seat behind you in Mrs. Damon’s first hour English class, stabbed you right in the shoulder blade with a dully sharpened pencil just to inform you that he liked your shirt. You, in all your teacher’s pet façade, had only shushed him harshly and glared before turning back around. But some time between the ice breakers and the saving grace of the first bell of what would be a long high school career, you’d decided you would address him before you’d scurried out of that classroom and thank him. But not before you’d informed him that you didn’t even know the band displayed, had just thrifted the shirt for looking cool, and had unknowingly sent Eddie on a mission to educate you in the glory of his favorite band. 
And nearly six years later, he was still on that mission. You were stubborn and had sworn loyalty to Fleetwood Mac before Eddie and Metallica had ever even stood a chance. 
He doesn’t mind. He’d listen to the Rumors album on repeat for the rest of his days if it meant he always ended up in this position at the end of the day — in his room, on his bed, lounging with you to pass the time. 
Your wrist is still held up dangerously close to Eddie’s face in the present day, a look of determination and contemplation overtaking you, “Smell. My. Wrist.” 
Six years is a long time to grow comfortable with someone. And, in Eddie’s case, fall in love with your best friend. 
“I’m not smelling your wrist, weirdo,” he mumbles as he swats your hand away, squinting at the way you were perched on your knees as they sunk into his mattress. He had been halfway to a much needed nap before you had lost interest in whatever magazine you’d been reading, “Why do you even need me to? What didja do to it?” 
His words are still half slurring from fatigue. If he cuts off your pestering strategically enough, he might still achieve that nap his heavy bones so desperately yearned for. 
You readjust yourself, flopping down to sit beside Eddie with your legs stretched out as he lifts himself up. Shoulder to shoulder, calf along calf, the two of you prop your backs against his warm bedroom wall, “I went to Starcourt yesterday with Nancy and bought some new perfumes-“
“Perfumes?” he wrinkles his nose, “Plural?” 
He would have sworn he’d have noticed a new perfume, but these days, he’d been trying to put some restraint on his pathetic crush. Tried to tame the yearning inside of him, which meant less indulging in things like sniffing the air like a freakish dog whenever you entered a room just to drink in the smell of you that had brought him so much comfort over the years. Less letting his eyes linger on the straps of the bras you’d started wearing more of since you’d begun to hang out more with the likes of Nancy Wheeler, who had been single-handedly teaching you how to be a girl in a way Eddie had never witnessed from you. 
You’d wasted most of your critical youth surrounded by boys, by Eddie. Go figure that Wheeler was jumping at the opportunity to mold a blank canvas.
“Yes, I bought perfumes, plural, as in multiple- oh, don’t give me that look, Munson,” you scowl when he makes a face, wrinkles forming adorably between your brows. (Brows he was pretty sure Nancy had plucked for you last weekend, but again — Eddie wasn’t supposed to notice those things anymore. Tampering the crush, or whatever idiotic goal he had set for himself.), “They were on a BOGO sale. Bite me. Anyways, I got these new perfumes, and one of the ladies was telling me and Nance how you should layer your scents. Which, God, doesn’t that sound ridiculous?”
Eddie hums, eyebrows raised skeptically at where this rambling was going.
“So I bought these scents that she said might pair well together. But then, she was talking about body chemistry and-“ you cut yourself off, clearly realizing how boring this topic might be to someone like Eddie who hadn’t even picked out his own drugstore cologne (you had), “Listen, just… just stop questioning it and smell my wrist.” 
Once again, you hold your arm out in front of Eddie’s now softening face. He’s holding his breath, which he hopes you don’t notice, as he weighs his options.
Smell your wrist, probably subjecting himself to a terrible sort of pain when he realizes he'd much rather be placing feathery kisses there before moving onto your knuckles as he holds your hand. Or deny you, possibly hurt your feelings or offend you as he brushes this off as another girly thing he wanted nothing to do with. 
The fleeting image of your face if he were to reject you in this moment is enough to make his choice for him.
He never could say no to you.
“What am I even supposed to be smelling it for?” he grumbles as he reaches out and grabs your forearm, opting that safer territory than your hand as he guided your skin closer to him, “Like, I’m not a scents expert, sweet-“
Oh. 
Eddie’s brain short circuits as the tip of his nose brushes your soft skin. The pet name dies on his tongue, the inhale through his nose cutting off just as suddenly. 
Oh, God. Oh, fuck. 
He already knows he's a sucker for you, a dog with a bone when it comes to your presence and attention. He already relished in your old perfume's scent and the way it would cling to a room, lingering on his sheets when you’d sleep over after a movie night gone too late. When you’d borrow his Hellfire shirt and return it without washing it, leaving the collar tainted with sweetness and enough undertones of vanilla to make a chasm within him yearn terribly. 
But this new perfume, perfumes technically, were something different. They weren’t the same as the body spray you’d been using every day since freshman year. They were deeper, more complicated, more womanly than he had prepared himself for.
“Does it… does it smell good?” you meekly ask him, suddenly going shy at his frozen state, “Like, is it working with my… my own smell? Sometimes perfumes smell good on their own but don’t work with your body’s chemistry, that’s what the lady had been explaining to me and Nan-“
“It’s working.” 
It’s all he can manage to choke out as he lets go of your arm so that it falls away and takes the sweet smells with it. 
God, it was working.
Eddie felt more embarrassed than he had that first month of puberty, when he was just discovering girls and noticing the stretch of t-shirts over chests. He felt even more affected than the first time he’d let his eyes wander over the back of Cheryl T’s thighs the last day of eighth grade, and discovered the wonders of an ass’ curve. 
All his blood would not be rushing south. No. Absolutely not. He wouldn’t allow it, not when he was fully grown and should have some self-control, and certainly not when he was wearing his thinnest pair of boxers with grey fucking sweatpants. 
Your eyes are wide with innocence, or at least what he hopes is innocence, “Really? It smells good?”
He has to clear his throat before he can properly reply, “‘s good, yeah. It, uh, yeah. Smells good.” 
Think of naked grandmas. Think of kicked puppies. Think of literally anything except her soft ski-
“Awesome!” you’re suddenly sitting crisscross beside him, facing him fully, “Okay, that’s- awesome. Cool. Cool, cool, cool,” were you just as flustered as he was? Was he reading this wrong? “The lady actually told us - okay, I know it’s stupid and boring so bear with me - but she told us to put them on all our pulse points. So that way, it… uh… it makes the perfume last longer.” 
He can’t get the smell out of his nose. Something so sweet, something so enticing, something so… you. The perfumes were fancy, but somehow, they were you. Smells of summer and spring and tooth-aching sweetness that was driving Eddie mad.
He’ll never be able to let you sleep in his bed again. He doesn’t want to consider what shameful, hormone-fueled decisions he would make if he had to experience his pillow smelling like that even when you were long gone. 
Get it together, Munson. 
“Makes sense,” he lies, still struggling to get his tongue to function properly. All he’s thinking about is trailing it over that sweet spot on your wrist now, lips sucking on every inch of skin you currently had exposed- Naked grandmas. Kicked puppies, “Is that all you needed? Can I take a nap now?” 
Hell, he’s torn between wanting you to stay and ushering you out of his trailer so he can have a few moments alone. Weighing the risks of escaping to the bathroom for a few minutes too long just to get his problem under control. 
He’s twenty, not fifteen. A girl’s perfume should not be affecting him this way. 
Your face falls ever so slightly, “Oh, uh, yeah. Sorry. Like I said, I know it’s boring-“
“It’s not boring,” he interrupts, realizing that he’s mere seconds away from genuinely hurting your feelings. Or perhaps he’s already there, having been a complete idiot. He still remembers your face the day he’d contained his reaction to your new bra — how he’d gone into autopilot and snapped the strap like some little boy on the playground just to play off how flustered it made him. You hadn’t admitted it to him, but his reaction had hurt you. He wouldn’t make the same mistake twice, “The whole science behind it — it sounds pretty cool, honestly.” 
Nothing that made you so excited, so giddy, could ever be boring to him. He loved seeing you buzz with your emotions and expectancy. He just didn’t love the way his heart and mind seemed to run with every single, little, goddamn bone you tossed him. 
You were his best friend. He shouldn’t think of you like that. He couldn’t. 
“It is,” you light back up in the slightest, saucer eyes boring into his again. Not quite as animated as before, but not quite as deflated as you had been heading, “Actually- Can I ask another favor?”
Anything. 
“Sure, sweetheart,” his heart had finally slowed its pace, the reigns back in his control as the perfume lingered in the air but didn’t overwhelm him, “What’s up?” 
“So… the wrists aren’t the only pulse points you’re supposed to wear perfume on.” 
Oh, God. Where were you going with this?
“No?” he tries to tease, tries to smile at you. It’s fruitless — his heart has begun to pound again, “I sure hope it wouldn’t be. I mean, blood kind of rushes everywhere, isn’t that the point-“ 
“The neck,” you blurt out, making the rest of Eddie’s sentence disappear into the air, “The, uh, the neck is the other place. Well, not just the neck, it’s…” you trail off, twiddling with your thumbs for a second before you lift a hand to gather away any stray hairs from curtaining the side of your neck. You even go so far as to secure the hand behind your ear, “Behind the ears. You’re supposed to spray it behind your ears, too.”
“Okay…” he enunciates slowly, resisting the urge to bite his lip as he starts to catch up with where you’re going with this, and desperately hoping that he’s wrong. 
“Can you… Would you…” you pause and take a deep breath, eyes shutting for a second. When you open the back up, a new wave of determination is set around your pupils, “Eddie, can you smell my neck?” 
What sort of sick, twisted, wet dream am I living in right now? 
Eddie is suddenly convinced you never interrupted his attempt at a nap. He’s asleep right now, soundly curled into himself, and you’re still lounging casually with your magazine on the other side of his bed. That must be it, because there’s no way you’re actually offering him to press himself so closely into your vicinity as he’s only ever dreamed of. 
“What?” he weakly questions. 
If this is a dream, dear God, don’t let me wake up. 
“Can you smell my neck?” you repeat yourself with a little more confidence before pulling your best puppy dog eyes, “I just- I want to make sure it smells good. Everywhere.”  
Damn Nancy Wheeler for whatever journey of self-discovery she’d sent you on. Damn her, and damn the perfume lady, and damn Eddie for reaping such benefits. 
He should say no. He should really, really say no. 
He’s wearing goddamn grey sweatpants, he should say no. 
“S-Sure.” 
Famous last words. 
Your hair has already been moved, making it easier for Eddie when he leans forward at his waist. You lean in as well, jutting out your chin and angling your neck for his taking. 
It’s such a bad idea. 
The tip of his nose is bumping your skin again as his eyes flutter shut. He’s trying so hard to contain himself, to not make a fool of himself. But when he feels that softness again, when he’s being unraveled by warm notes of vanilla and patchouli, deep breaths of apple blossom of blackberry – he just breaks. 
He doesn’t realize that his lips have joined his nose in brushing up against your sweet spot until he hears you let out a shaky gasp, one that almost resembles a whine. 
His reaction should be to pull back. He should remove himself, apologize for going too far, stop before he’s fallen off the cliff himself. He doesn’t. 
Instead, he takes a moment of stillness as his head reels, overcome in the smell of your new perfume again and ears straining relentlessly to seek out another one of those pretty sounds. 
He wants to hear it again. He needs to know if it was a moan or a gasp, or nothing more than a ticklish breath. 
His lips pucker with intention this time. His nose trails up behind your ear, taking in the full bodied scent of the perfume on the skin as he places another chaste kiss against your pulse.
It’s racing. Your heartbeat is goddamn racing. 
The moment his lips connect, another gasp sounds. A sharp intake of breath that whistles so sweetly to his ears before you’re exhaling with a proper, albeit quiet, whimper. 
No amount of naked grandmas or kicked puppies can save him now. He’s a goner – he’s been a goner – and he leaps off that cliff full force now as he leans back and out of your space. 
Your eyes are shut. Eyelashes fluttering prettily, just barely brushing the skin beneath your eyes. 
He almost whispers out a gentle sweetheart as he stays close enough for you to feel his breath on that very same cheek, but when your eyes finally do open to meet his, he can’t get a single word out before his body moves to its own accord. 
His lips press to yours before he can overthink it.
He waits for the inevitable – for you to freeze up against him, for you to shove him off, for you to curse him out. He shouldn’t have done that. He should’ve asked for permission, he should have had more self-control. 
But you don’t. Instead, you take him by surprise and you kiss him back.
Instantly, without an inch of hesitation, your lips work in tangent with his. Parting and welcoming him as if they had been waiting for this moment longer than he could comprehend. Pressing back with just as much, if not more fervency as his do. You match his desperation every step of the way until you’ve both exhausted all the breath inside your lungs. He has no choice but to pull back, to part from you and gulp in oxygen before he makes any more bad decisions. 
Lord know he’s full of them when he’s suddenly gazing into your glossy eyes. 
“I’m sorry-” he immediately rushes out to apologize, but a sharp shake of your head halts him. 
“Don’t be,” you whisper, “I… Do it again.”
“What?” 
“Kiss me again. Please.”
Eddie isn’t in the business of making you beg; he never really can say no to you. 
He kisses you again. And again. And again. A collage of pecks and soft slipping, tasting your chapstick and somehow moving the two of you so that he’s back to his original position with his back against the wall, and you now straddling his lap. You hover, completely unaware of how much you’re affecting him. When you let his tongue slip into your mouth without any bartering, he ends up letting out a moan that slips right down your throat. His hands are still so hesitant, but when you reach down and encourage his palms to engulf wherever they please, he’s on a mission of exploration. Soft caresses to your thighs, from the ditch of your bent knees to the skin hardly hidden beneath the hem of your lounge shorts. They wind their way up the pathways of your hips, squeezing at the soft give of the flesh there before he continues upwards. Up, up, up – until they find home in the curve of your waist, wrapping his arms around you and tugging you impossibly close. 
That damn perfume doesn’t just linger, not anymore. With you pressed against him, with the way he’s wound so tightly around you, it drowns him. Vanilla, coffee, blackberry, apple blossoms. A multitude of scents he’s sure his plain nose can’t even pick up on, and that he doesn’t really care to name. All he cares about is the smell of you. Something new and something fancy, but so very you. 
“I-” you break from the kiss, “Can’t-” you smack another one on him, beginning to take initiative, “Believe-” the next one misses his mouth, hardly landing against the upturned corner, “It took-” your final kiss lands on his dimple before you pull back fully and cup his hands within your palms, still hovering and straddling his waist, “A stupid fucking perfume ruse to get you to kiss me.”
He’s lovedrunk, all slow blinks and dumb-founded smile as he looks up at you, hardly processing the words, “What do you mean?” 
“I mean,” you squeeze his cheeks a little tighter in your touch, “I can’t believe I had to pull that whole stupid act of fluttering my lashes and oh, Eddie, can you smell my perfume for me? To make sure it smells good? To finally get you to just do something.” 
His head clears a little as the ghost of your kiss still buzzes on his lips, “Wait- what?” 
Your palms slide away, scratching at what scruff has gathered across his jaw line before your hands fully fall away, “You made me act like a damn fool, Eddie Munson.”
“It was all just an act?” 
“I can’t believe you were so oblivious.”
“You only made me do that so I’d kiss you?” 
“That,” you shrug, curling your hands into fists and gingerly placing them on his chest as his arms untangle from you slightly, only his knuckles resting on your waist now, “And the bra thing. And the whole thing when I bought all those chapsticks and couldn’t pick a favorite flavor.”
“They all tasted good,” he says, confused as he peers up at your faux annoyance, “I even tried them on for you-”
“I didn’t want you to try them on,” you whine, letting a few breathy laughs slip as you sit back, resting your weight entirely on his thighs and narrowly missing his boner you surely hadn’t noticed yet, “I wanted you to taste them off of me. I wanted you to make me put each one on, and kiss me stupid before you’d demand that I move onto the next one. I wanted to be the one to get your lips all sticky, not the fucking chapstick tubes themselves.”
“You-” Eddie’s mouth drops wide open, nearly wider than his eyes, “Hold on, you only brought that up so I’d fucking kiss you?” 
You nod as if it had been obvious, grinning wildly now, “God, you’re dense, Munson. I kept telling Nancy you’d figure it out eventually-”
“What does Nancy have to do with this?” 
“Nancy has been trying to help me concoct ways to get you to grow the balls and kiss me for months now. Although, to be fair, the bra thing had been Steve’s idea.” 
“Harrington?” Eddie gasps out in disbelief as you only throw your head back in laughter. It’s a beautiful sound, one that makes Eddie’s heart race even more painfully than the perfume had, “You went to Harrington for advice about me?”
When you lift your head back up to look at him, you’re all soft smiles and delighted eyes as you quietly admit, “I was getting kind of desperate here.” 
His chest heaves, finger unfurling from around your waist. 
“I was starting to think maybe you just didn’t like me bac-”
Without warning, Eddie’s hands are gripping your hips and he’s flipping positions, pinning you beneath him. He can’t wrap his head around it. You’d been wanting him to kiss you all this time. And he’d been a blind idiot. Snapping your bra straps, stealing away chapsticks and applying them himself when this entire time, he could have been living out his wildest fantasies. 
He doesn’t give you a chance to say anything more as he begins to attack you with kisses. One for every missed opportunity. No expanse of skin goes untouched as they graze over your lips, your cheeks, your chin, your neck – anywhere Eddie can access feels the pressure of his eagerness. 
“Are you fucking kidding me?” he curses himself over your giggles, coming up for air just to stare at you, “I could have- Oh my God. Sweetheart, I’m such a fucking idiot.” 
“You are,” you agree breathlessly with aching cheeks, “God, you are.” 
He balances himself on his forearms as he stays lifted above you, his hair forming a curtain to cut the two of you off from the rest of the world. 
You’re beautiful. Even more beautiful than that first day he’d met you in class, when you’d shushed him and all he did in return was make absolute heart eyes at you. 
His best friend. The person he’d be yearning and pining for for six long years. Who had been trying to get him to kiss her for over six months now. 
“I like you,” you confess, not breaking eye contact as a hand comes up to his cheek. He’s quick to turn his head, to let your palm press against him as he presses a kiss to your inner wrist, the perfume engulfing him again, “In case that wasn’t obvious.” 
He swallows hard, letting his lips remove themselves slowly from your skin and his nose to linger as it presses into the smooth skin, “I like you, too. Have for a few years now.”
“A few?”
“Okay, yeah- the whole time,” his words pull a wider grin from you, “Don’t look so smug. I’m not letting you live down this whole perfume bullshit scheme.” 
“And I’m not letting you live down going feral over some overpriced scented oils,” you retort, your cute snort cut short as your breath catches when he kisses your wrist again, “In all seriousness, though… Do you really think it smells good?” 
He takes the opportunity to finally lower his hips. Just enough so that his crotch is brushing against your inner thigh, “Yeah, I think you could say I think they smell very good.” 
Your hand travels back, caressing at his ear and sending a shiver down his spine before both of them latch behind his neck, prepared to pull him down into a kiss, “You got hard over some new perfumes, Munson? God, you’re easy.” 
“I am,” he doesn’t fight it as he lets you, not gravity, tug him downwards, “I am so easy when it comes to you, baby.” 
“Good thing I’m wearing one of those new bras, then,” you muse, placing far too quick of a kiss for his liking onto his lips before you tug him a bit lower, burying his face back in the side of your neck as you whisper in his ear, “Prove it.” 
Eddie should probably send a thank you card to Nancy Wheeler and the mall’s perfume lady. Not Harrington, though. Never Steve Harrington.
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How would IMP, The Goetia's and whichever Hazbin characters you want react to their SO being a clumsy, dense, idiot who messes up in nearly everything except expressing their love for them
With a clumsy, dense, idiotic S/O that loves them oh so much.
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Blitzø
Blitzø doesn't really care how clumsy or dense you were, I mean the idiot was an idiot himself, so he didn't really care if you were as well.
And sure, he had to be very specific with you and couldn't keep breakable objects near any edges and sure you weren't the brightest. But neither was he.
And he was awesome.
But Blitzø didn't care about any of that.
He loved you for you.
And sure it was frustrating when you accidentally broke something, or when he was forced to explain to you something a dozen times before you got it. But you always tried your best and that's all he could ask.
Plus, when he got mad at you, you got all sad and you being sad is like, the sadest thing he'd ever seen.
But no matter how frustrating you could be, you absolutely made up for it with just an overwhelming amount of love.
You wwre constantly telling him how much you love him. Leaving him love letters, drawings, and just giving general physical affection.
Kisses were your favourite.
Surprise kisses? Even. better!
Youd pop out of nowhere, giving him a smooch randomly throughout the day.
He loved this of course, the Imp a total sucker for your goofy, spontaneous romance. Always eating it up like the tastiest thing in Hell.
Millie
Millie just loved you.
You may have been a ditz, and not the sharpest blade up her sleeve, but you were her favourite person in Hell.
She just loved your clumsy, lovable and admittedly dim intellect.
Now, it could be difficult to deal with you, not being the brightest bulb and all that, but she also wasn't above admitting she did like being the smarter one in the relationship.
Not that that would have changed her wearing the metaphorical pants in the relationship.
She absolutely loved your affection, you being a hopeless romantic. She absolutely loved your affection.
The woman herself was a loving momma bear and just ate up your affection, the two of you just hopelessly in love.
Funnily enough, her family had a mixed opinion of you. On one hand they saw you as a ditzy, air headed and rather clumsy. A dangerous combination on Wrath.
But they also saw you as an honest, hard working and straightforward person that didn't shy away from hard work, aaand you could take a joke, a respectable combination on for the in-laws, Millie parents eventually warming up to you.
This only making Millie love you even more.
Moxxie
If you were anyone else, Moxxie likely would have despised you.
Your laid back, careless nature. Your ditzy, airheaded behaviour, the way you think everyone is a potential friend and your seemingly supernatural ability to knck things over.
It was infuriating.
But with you being his S/O, it was different.
All those thing that would normally make him want to tear his hair out, he just found them endearing.
Your ditzy bumbling behaviour was cute and lovable the the thespian. You were like a big puppy.
Your clumsiness was something he always attributed to bad eye sight, and your being dense, well... he didn't need sarcasm anyway.
And sure, you weren't good at much, but you loved him. And you made sure he knew.
If he ever needed anything, you were on it in a second, suddenly the sharpest and most competent Imp he'd ever seen until you finished what he'd asked for.
You loved affection. You'd often hold him close, petting, nuzzling, kissing. You loved any type of affection. You being excellent when he got stressed out, holding him close, doing your best to calm him down.
You were his favourite Imp in hell and funilly enough, if you were anyone else, he'd hate you. The man having a little chuckle over that from time to time.
Loona
Loona wasn't a picky person.
She was emotional, hormonal, moody, and often time violent.
And yeah, she hated most the shmucks in this literal Hellscape, seeing them as a fucking bother.
But... as much as she hated to admit it. She had the biggest soft spot for you.
Sure you were a ditz and couldn't not knock something over to save your life, but... all things considered, you were probably one of her favourite people in the world.
You were blunt as spoon and sure, you often said the wrong thing at the wrong time, but you were honest about everything.
She wasn't even sure you could lie, you were just too damned dense to make things up.
And yeah, that could be an issue, like the time Blitzø had asked where you'd been all day, and you without missing a beat just Blurted out that you'd snuck away to make out.
And sure, that was fucking annoying.
But when you saw you'd upset her, you did your absolute best to make it up to her. Going out and getting that chocolate cake you knew she loved. You bluntly apologising for being so stupid.
That being when she stepped in, making you stop. Telling you you aren't stupid, your just dull, and she couldn't blame you for that.
Youd end up, curled up together on the room, eating the cake together, curled up in a surprisingly romantic little moment together.
Stolas
Oh, Stolas just loved you!
Your simple, ditzy nature was just so endearing for the man. He just loved how straightforward you were.
Granted, much of that came from being as dull as a busted light bulb, but he loved that none the less.
Granted, some of his more witty remarks went well over your head, but that was a small price to pay for the refreshment that was your company.
It didn't matter what it was, if he asked a question, he got an honest, straightforward response. Always.
Now sure, most would likely take offence to many of your answers. "does this make me look fat?" Or "do you like my hair cut?" Being a question you'd answer brutally honest.
But to the prince, whom has lived his entire life surrounded by people that would either kiss his ass, or do everything in their power to destroy him.
But you, you were honest because, well, that was who you were. You told him the truth, good or bad, and he loved you for it.
And in the bedroom, well~
Brutal honesty could be extremely arousing. You telling him exactly if you thought he was attractive, usually in brutal detail.
And well, you always told him how you felt, if ever the relationship was in turmoil, you'd tell him exactly the problem.
And the affection!
Oh how he loved your affection.
From the hugs and kisses, the the Lewder things you'd do in private, like taking the man when you felt like it, Stolas making it clear he was DTF 24/7. And well, you weren't dense enough to not know what that was~
You were what he needed. Brutally honest, a little air headed and absolutely gushing with affection. You were the light of his life and no matter how frustrating you could be at times, he loved you more then life itself.
Stella
Stella was something of a perfectionist.
And normally she'd expect as much from her partner.
But you... you were a clumsy, dim witted, moronic and dense as lead.
But by Lucifer, she loved you.
She was so used to everything being perfect, dealing with people who she could never tell what they were thinking. Her fellow Bluebloods always conniving, always with an alternative motive.
But with you... she always knew what you were thinking. Always knew what you wanted or how you felt.
And sure, you had no spacial awareness and wouldn't recognise sarcasm if it smacked you in the face.
But again, that's what she loved.
And you loved her.
And you made sure she knew it.
Mostly because you were constantly telling her. That always making her swell with emotion.
The woman so happy to have you in her life.
You were her safety blanket. Something she could always count on, you absolutely showered her in affection.
You gave affection like Nobles gave insults, you were completely unashamed to tell her you loved her more then anything in the world, anywhere, any time.
Your favourite was coming up to her, calmly asking her lean down.
And when she did, youd give her a big smooch, before walking off, happily going about your buisness.
And yes, you could be frustrating at times, but so could everything else in her life, the woman was just glad she had something to give her some happiness in her Hellish Royal existence.
Here, to tide you over until season 2 is finally out.
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rad-batson · 7 months
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Hi I'm rewatching Psych (2006) and have found some glaring similarities between Shawn Spencer and Bruce Wayne:
This is very important research. Do not scroll >:(
Bruce Wayne and Shawn Spencer
Not Your Average Detective TM
Works with the local police department, solves crimes in the most illegal way possible
Definitely needs to see a therapist, literally would rather die
Puts on an elaborate show to lie about his identity but he really doesn’t need to be that dramatic about it???? Calm down 🤨
Barely one step above a silly cartoon character, but it is very close
Has a father figure who constantly vocalizes they did not raise him like this while also cleaning up his messes (with love, of course. And sarcasm)
Autistic Swag. Unmedicated.
Hyper-observant with incredible deductive reasoning skills to the point that others are convinced he has supernatural abilities
✨ Breaking and entering ✨
Sleeps in his man cave more than in his actual bed
Homoerotic tension with a grumpy salt-and-pepper detective (if you squint)
Has a psychotic mortal enemy who insists they’re friends despite attempting to kill his family members on several occasions through fun little games and riddles
Owns a business
Wants to lie down and take a nap but if he does then he’ll be left alone with his thoughts so he instead performs dangerous acts of heroism, knowing full well that said dangerous acts do not promise a paycheck
COMMITS TO THE BIT
Way smarter than he publicly lets on
Wanted in several foreign countries, probably
His best friend is both tired of his shit and constantly enabling his weird antics despite having a serious day job because they know he is Much Worse when left unsupervised and they are secretly also just as unhinged
Has mad sexual tension with a concerning amount of criminals
Casually tries to walk off a bullet wound, worrying everyone
Lives in a major coastal city with perpetually constant weather conditions and a surprisingly high crime rate
Bisexual, Canon Be Damned
And yet the straight ship? Still Iconic
Uses his ditzy, flamboyant playboy image to simultaneously protect his biggest secret and hide his deeply scarring childhood trauma
Is babygirl
Bruce Wayne
Orphan
Outwardly has a dark, pessimistic outlook on life
Secretly hopeful and would do anything to make his loved ones happy
Won't shoot a gun but will beat the crap out of you
Bats on everything
Lives on the East Coast
Actually has Autism AND ADHD but his sidekick has more ADHD, making him the default Autism solidarity
Has health insurance
Shawn Spencer
Child of divorce
Outwardly hopeful and would do anything to make his loved ones happy
Secretly has a dark, pessimistic outlook on life
Doesn't know hand-to-hand combat but is a great shot
Pineapples on everything
Lives on the West Coast
Actually has ADHD AND autism but his sidekick has more Autism, making him the default ADHD solidarity
Does not have health insurance
YES THIS WAS VERY NECESSARY THANK YOU AND GOODNIGHT
Feel free to add stuff if you also love Psych :D I'm on my third rewatch now
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merakiui · 11 months
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MERA!!!! MERA MERA MERAAAA!!!! hear me outtttt!!!!!
yandere!idol!scara! imagine being one of idol! scara's biggest fans , having bought all his albums and merch, unaware that your oshi/bias is stalking you in the shadows. you are completely oblivious to the fact that your favorite idol, your very own oshi, is more obsessed with you than you are with him ... eubeheheheheheheheheheheeeee
it's important to note that he's the eldest son of a CEO, so he'd have all the money and status to keep your mysterious disappearance under wraps. just listen to him and you'll be fine. after all, isn't he your oshi?
AAAAAA YES YES YES ever since I saw this oshi no ko parody of Scara idol!Scara has been rotting my brain. Your concept feeds me so well omg!!!! <3
Imagine being such a dedicated fan, always using most of your paychecks to purchase merch and albums and even concert tickets. You adore him. He shines so brightly when he's on the stage, and his voice is the most beautiful melody you've ever heard. You memorize all of his songs, you try to follow his routines for exercise and eating well, and you've even had the blessing of attending one of his handshake events!! Even if it was only a few seconds, being able to look him in the eyes, shake his hand, and greet him in such an intimate proximity meant the world to you. You were so happy following that day that your coworkers were left wondering what happened for you to come to work in such a bubbly mood.
Unbeknownst to you, your idol makes it a mission to search for you amidst the crowd, even if he knows it may be impossible to spot you from afar. The day he shook your hand was also a special moment for him. He's only ever watched you from the shadows, admiring you as you go about your daily life, so being able to touch you, to see you so closely, to hear your voice as it addresses him and only him... You make him so happy and you don't even know it! One of his songs was even written with you in mind. You inspire him, you give him life, you give him feelings he's never known he was capable of feeling before. He's hopelessly, dangerously in love with you, his fan, and you're hopelessly, adoringly in love with him, your idol.
Scara doesn't shine so brightly behind closed doors when he's following the whims of his obsession. On the stage, he's Scaramouche, a star who can effortlessly charm with his beautiful vocals and sweet smile. He's a great actor, enthralling the crowd with a wink or a twirl or well-calculated sarcasm. Fans adore it. They love the divide between sweet and sour, and he does both so flawlessly. But beyond that, he's just Kunikuzushi, eldest son of the business magnate Ei. With so much wealth and success, one would think he'd be in paradise. But Kuni's always so hollow inside, so lonely and sad. He pushes these feelings away and tells himself he's better off alone, but when he's following you home late at night he feels so whole. Suddenly his lonely life doesn't feel so terrible when he knows you're in it. Suddenly he thinks it's okay to be alone as long as he's alone with you and only you.
Ei never polices what he does. It's much the same for his sister Raiden. They're free to do as they please, as she's too busy running such a large, expansive business with her Vice President Yae Miko and secretary Kujou Sara to bother with the lives of her children. But Kuni doesn't care. He doesn't need to be coddled or loved. He just needs to drown in you, in your life, in your interests and hobbies. He's certain that, if he were to steal you away for himself, you wouldn't mind it because you're his fan. You'll forgive him because you love and support him, won't you? After all, it's every fan's dream to be recognized by their idol.
He won't subject you to a terrible life either. He lives in a very expensive penthouse on the highest floor, and it has all kinds of luxurious, comforts. It overlooks the city; he's almost like a god when he peers down at the streets below, where people are free to look up but can never reach his level. You can live up here with him, isolated from the world and its horrors, and only know of him. He's all you'll need because he can provide for you in ways normal people can't. He's so certain you'll accept this way of life, and even if you don't it's not like you can go anywhere. Not that he cares much for reputations, but his entire career will shatter if you escape and try to get him in trouble. He might even be taken away from you, and that's more scary than a reputation in shambles.
Besides, he has more money than he knows what to do with. And for the right price, he can control anyone, even the authorities you seem to have so much faith in. :)
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pandoramyst · 1 year
Text
what wasn’t there before II ✩ Jake sully
contents. 18+ g!reader, dbf!jake, cute names, fluff, adult behavior, age gap
summary. Jake was your father’s best friend but to him, he was like his brother. When you entered puberty, you started to feel foreign feelings about him that certainly, you shouldn’t have been having. When you got a bit older, you grew closer to him and you noticed that he acted the same way toward you.
notes. the love yall give me makes me wanna tear up fr :( also its not edited so sorry for typos and mistakes :/
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The last couple of weeks were a rush of adrenaline. The sneaky touching and pecking when your father had his back turned was thrilling but it only pushed you to do it more. Jake had shown you depths of Pandora you never even knew existed and it made you more grateful for his presence in your life.
Not one day went by without him sneaking into your room when he visited to shower you with love. He would do anything just to see your face, even if it was just for a moment. You two grew closer than you had thought was right. Despite the good moments, the doubt you felt never escaped you. Your relationship was obviously dangerous considering Jake was much older than you. However, at his maturity was when your doubt halted. He respected every boundary you had vocally expressed to him and moved completely at your pace.
You wouldn't be shy in saying that your boundaries were certainly strict. But that only lasted until today. Your dad was still asleep as the sun still hurried to rise when you heard the main curtains of your hub shuffle. You were still in bed, appreciating the warm sun on your cheek. The sun shined from the big opening above your bed that worked as a window.
Your head turned when you saw Jake’s big figure walk through the curtains. He removed his bandolier, letting the arrows fall on the floor. His hair was still down from the night before when you used some of your mother’s oil on his hair as hair therapy.
He smiled at you and fell right on top of your body, his arms slowly lowering his torso on top of yours. “Morning, soldier” you chuckled and pressed your lips on his head, giving him tiny kisses.
“you look like an angel in the morning,” he lifted his head up, staring at your face which had started to become red. You pressed his head back into your neck, smelling his coconut-scented hair. This was typical of you two. He would welcome you in the morning in bed, typically before your father woke up, and you would lay there with him, brushing your fingers through his hair.
“What are we doing today?” He asked, his voice muffled.
“My dad will force me to go to the blue petal festival. It’s an annual tradition for us. He wants to take my mom out so he said he needs to get rid of me somehow,” Jake’s body shook as he laughed at your sarcasm.
“Well, lucky you. You’re gonna get more Jake time,” He looked at you and scrunched his nose with a smile. You squished his cheeks together and pouted at his cuteness. “Wanna come with me?”
He raised his eyebrows, “To the festival?”
“Yes dummy,” You said flicking his forehead.
“Are you sure? It isn’t really my setting?”
“Oh wow, is that your excuse for not wanting to hang out with me?” You rolled your eyes at him playfully and pushed him off of you.
“How dare you,” He gasped and tried to reach out for you as you walked towards your wooden wardrobe. You opened the doors and pulled out a white sleeveless tank top with a long blue loincloth to match it.
You placed it in front of your body and smirked at him, “You like it?” His elbow rested on the bed and he stared at you with half-closed eyes, lip between his teeth. “Come here and let me show you how much I like it,” You dropped the outfit on the floor and slowly walked towards him. 
He reached out a hand to you and when you grabbed it, he pulled you down on top of him. His arm was secured on your waist as he kissed your face. His lips inched closer to your lips but he avoided them, showing you once again how committed he was to respect you.
You placed each of your arms next to his head on the bed, and you lowered your face to his. His eyes went to your lips and then looked up into your own. “Want me to come to the fest, baby?” he whispered a breathy “hm”.
You breathed on his lips, closing your eyes as you synched your breathing. His hands went down to your lower back, caressing it with his thumbs. You could sense he felt uncertain about whether to make the first move or not so you just initiated it. 
“Please, come..” your voice became deeper
You pressed your lips on him, savoring the moment. He moved his lips with yours, slowly and deeply. His hands went on your bum, rubbing it up and down as he found new confidence in being bold with you. His fingers hooked around your shorts, pulling them down to reveal the floral print underwear that he had gifted you.
Underneath, you were clearly wet, the dark, wet patch on your undies making it apparent. Your underwear was creating friction as it was rubbing against his thigh. “you're wet, pretty girl?”
“Jake..” his name rolled off your tongue and with a whiney voice you begged him. He kissed your lips sweetly, sucking them with his so that he can pull you more towards him. When he backed off, he used his finger to pull up a hair strand that had fallen on your nose.
“Your dad should be awake now, don’t want him to catch us, do we bun?” Jake raised his eyebrows and your face relaxed. But it wasn't the calm kind of relaxed. It was the face you made when you were pissed. Your eyebrows and eyes were relaxed and your lips were slightly pushed forward. Jake had spent many days with you to know what you looked like when pissed.
You pushed yourself up from the bed and looked down at him, before walking towards the curtain that separated your bedroom from the kitchen.
“Oh, bunny” he rubbed his nose with his fingers and his head fell back on the bed. Despite you not wanting to admit it, he was right. Your father was in the kitchen, cooking breakfast. His back was turned to you. Jake had already made it out the window in your room and to the front curtain of the hub.
“Your late, partner” Jake had walked through the opening, holding the curtain above his head. Your dad walked towards him, giving him his hand to do their typical handshake. You walked out to the balcony and saw your mother sitting on the swinging wooden bench, a mug in her hand.
“Mama,” you sat next to her and she placed her hand in your hair, pushing it out of the way. “Haven't seen you in a while, my sun” your mother had been stuck in bed as she was carrying your baby brother in her belly. This pregnancy was far more tiring than the last one and you had witnessed it. Helping her stand up from low platforms and making sure when she wakes up at night to empty her bladder, that she is safe.
“How do you feel?”
“Ready to see this fussy boy already,” she said while rubbing her belly. You chuckled and watched her proudly stare at the bump as if your brother was physically here with you.
“Shouldn't you be getting ready for the festival?” she raised her eyebrows
You groaned, “Mama, I don't wanna gooo. It's so boring” She held her belly and laughed at your whining. “Come on, it's not so bad. Get your butt up and go get ready, I'm sure Neïtan will be waiting for you,” she nudged your shoulder.
Neïtan and you had a bit of a difficult relationship to describe. He wasn’t exactly your friend, more so your friend’s friend but regardless he always hung around you. Occasionally, when you were hanging out he would shoot you glances and winks, making it obvious that he was into you.
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mediocreanomaly · 10 months
Text
Baby Fever with Trigun Boys!
Authors Note: I’ve been so obsessed with the Trigun baby post recently it’s been filling my head with thoughts, so here’s all the Trigun boys with if they would want kids + how many kids I think they’d have! (w Livio, Razlo, and Legato because they never get enough love 💔)  
Trigger warning: hints of pocd in Legatos (his is at the very end so you can stop reading before his if it’s a sensitive subject) 
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Vash:
Would Vash want kids? Yes...eventually 
•When he first thinks about having kids with you he’s over the moon excited but then the longer he thinks about it the more nervous he gets. He does want a baby but he already feels bad for dragging you along and putting you in danger, and he’s got a bit of a self loathing streak (he makes me so sad) so he’ll probably slow down and try to convince you to wait until he stops his brother to have a family
•The other thing is he’s also not even sure if it’s possible, plant and human hybrid??? it’s never been done, not that he’s not eventually down for trying
•Although once he gets it in his head that you want a baby with him he discovers a side of himself that he didn’t know existed until now, rest assured you won’t be leaving the bed anytime soon.
•If you get pregnant before Vash can stop his brother he might mope just a bit apologizing despite you not really being mad, but it doesn’t last long. Then he’s both super excited and super stressed! What do babies need? are you hot? cold? do you need him to carry you? need help reaching something? he’s there fussing over you like a mother hen
•If you get pregnant after he deals with Knives, then he’s a lot more eager right off the bat, excited to start a family after everything he’s been through (still a mother hen though)
•Vash 👏 has 👏twins 👏
•Two little girls to be exact! one for each arm, one for each parent! Double the cuteness!
• Vash is a very good dad, eager to raise his children the way he thinks Rem would want him to, plus he has you! They grow a bit faster than human children thanks to the plant genes but not nearly as fast as Vash and Nai grew up so luckily you guys get to still enjoy them being small
• As the twins grow up they are eerily similar to how Vash and Nai were as children. In fact Vash gets a bit nervous when his other little girl takes on so many personality traits of his older brother, he stresses about it a bit, not that he didn’t love Nai but he doesn’t want history to repeat itself. Luckily he has you by his side, every time he lets his thoughts run wild, he watches the way you so gently parent the twins...he takes a small breath of relief. He feels in a way...he failed his brother but this is different, this time it’ll be okay
Wolfwood:
Does he want kids? Yes  👍
•Wolfwood loves kids so it’s natural he’d want some of his own and especially if it’s with you
•Thing is slightly similar to Vash he’d be a bit reluctant to have kids right now. He’s got a lot on his plate and he also has a bit of a self loathing streak (Trigun boys x therapy) he isn’t sure he deserves to start a family with someone as good as you
•When you do start a family Nick goes from 0-100 real fast, and by that I mean he goes from being protective to guard dog mode 24/7 but can you blame him? He’s seen how dangerous the world is he’ll die before he let’s anything happen to you or his unborn child
•Your first kid is a little girl, one that grows up to be...a little too much like her father. Sarcasm is her default speech and she’s a little head strong, but very protective of her family
•Now I don’t see enough people talking about this but??? Wolfwood??? would for sure want to adopt a kid??? He grew up in an orphanage, so of course your second kid was adopted. As much as he loves your daughter he knows how much the kids at the orphanage need a good home, so you welcome in a little boy. One that's a bit timid and shy and reminds Wolfwood all too much of little Livio when he was young, safe to say it pulls on his heart strings
•The last kid is the baby! Your daughter and son are a bit older and the third was admittedly a bit of an accident, not an unwelcomed one, but not planned. Either way Nick is happy about it (plus he’s really good at taking care of babies) In all you tie off your happy little family with three kids (four if you count nick lol)
•Wolfwood is a good dad though. Also he’s the kids favorite, so expect to get jealous when after school all the kids run into his arms. Don’t expect condolences either, this man will look up at you, all the kids in his arms and give you the biggest shit eating grin too...the bastard.
Knives
Would he want kids? Yes if you take care of them lmao
•Okay so unlike Vash and Wolfwood, Knives sees himself as an apex, so he can protect you and his kids from anything, if he decides he wants kids he doesn’t feel the need to wait
•The only thing is...it’s cannon he’s got a thing for impregnation right? but you have to realize this is for Plants, plant children aren’t like human children (or in this case plant/human children?) they grown alot faster, understand alot quicker, and he’s not the most...nurturing guy in the world. 
 •So buckle up because you’ll be in charge of most the children's care! don’t worry too much though, if you ask for something he’ll provide it so you won’t ever need to stress about not having anything. 
•During the pregnancy he’s fiercely protective over you, keeping you in his private wing in a plush bed. Only letting Legato help take care of you and Conrad whos in charge of your check ups
•Now honestly I’m not sure how many kids he’d have, so I see one of two options
•option one, an only child. One that he has you raise then begins to take more under his wing as he or she grows up. A child that's, in a way, the heir of everything Nai has built, one that will grow to be as strong as their father (with hopefully a bit more care thanks to you)
•option two, lots of children. Once he sees your pregnant the first time...well he likes you like that, might as well keep you like that all the time right? Besides don’t you want to continue his legacy?
•Either way he does like love  his children, he just has a hard time showing it. He tries to show he cares though i mean you’ve seen how he is with Vash. Honestly I think it’s easier for your kids to understand their fathers affections since their half plant, gives them a better insight you know? (if you mess with them it’s literally the quickest way to die though so it’s not like that aren’t under his care still) 
Livio
Does he want children? 100% Yes!
•This man...ugh this man
•Livio 100% wants kids with you, he’s a gentle giant and a soft soul at heart. He wants nothing more than to settle down with you and have a couple little feet running around.
•This man is so patient so caring with you. He’s also a little scared he’ll hurt you once you’re pregnant I mean look at you!!! you’re so cute! waddling around all that baby weight, what if he crushes you? or bumps into you and hurts the baby? what do you mean that's not how that works?
•Despite his worries you welcome a happy healthy baby girl, who he’s still a little apprehensive about hurting at first but once you guide him through holding the little bundle of joy he’ll settle a bit
•So you have your first little girl, and after about a year you decide to try for another. You and livio decide you want to try to have one boy one girl, only thing is...you have another little girl! but that's okay! because a year after that you try again...and have another little girl. Livio accepts his fate after that.
•all jokes! Livio really does love his little girls to death, he doesn’t really care if he has a little boy or not, besides it’s endlessly hilarious to come home and see this hulk of a man surrounded by three little girls, one of which has dressed him up in a pink tutu so he can attend her royal tea party, another using her cheap kid make up to make him “the prettiest girl at the ball” while she smears eyeshadow on his face and another one yet pulling what hair he has into multiple little pig tails. 
•Now I do have one small headcannon that only applies if you are in a relationship with both Livio and Razlo. If you are in a relationship with both the boys then Razlo sees the girls as his kids but not his kids if that makes sense...as in he helps raise them as his own but he doesn’t feel like he in particular made them you know?
•Razlo will probably ask if he can try for one kid with you (if you know what I mean) and you'll end up with one more kid, your youngest and ofcourse...it’s a boy! Razlo will never let Livio live this down, he will tease Livio about this fact forever. “What like it was hard?” “Shut up Razlo” 
Razlo
Does he want kids? Maybe?
•Razlos a little on the fence about kids at first. He’s spent his life training, protecting, killing. As cocky as he acts he isn’t sure he’d be a good dad.
•Once he get’s more settled into his life not constantly fighting he’ll start to consider it though, because Razlo does like kids it’s just...he spent his whole life protecting Livio he had just never really considered the fact he might one day have a family of his own
•When you’re pregnant he follows you around like a puppy, his broad form is like a large shadow keeping a watchful eye over your smaller form. Unlike Livio though he’s a little less scared of his strength, in fact he likes to use it to his advantage, why waste his gift right? so expect him to try to carry you around everywhere. Also don’t even think about lifting anything, that’s what he’s for!
•As mentioned in Livios if you are in a relationship with both Razlo and Livio then Razlo will only really try to get you pregnant once after all Livios kids born. He’s content with raising all the girls and one little boy. (Razlo also gets swept up into the parties. He puts up a bit more of a fight and complains and bit more then Livio does but he loves them so he deals with it.) 
•As for his little boy he tries to get him into more traditionally masculine things so he can have a break from playing princess but he’s actually very accepting of whatever his kids want to do. If his little boy end up liking the stuff he does? great! If he doesn’t and just wants to join his sisters? also great! I mean, he’s a little less thrilled there's now four sets of hands hastily applying lipstick to his face, but that’s life. (Jokes on him, it ends up being one of the little girls who’s a little tomboy. “papa Razlo? can we go catch bugs?” “Oh thank god yes let’s go”) 
•But!!! If you are in a relationship with just Razlo then it’s a bit different. He’ll probably end up with two kids, both boys. The first boy is alot like him, very loud, blunt, and protective. He’s also a bit of a trouble maker and it doesn’t help Razlo is a bit of a yes man which ends in both of them with their heads bowed while you scold them
•Your younger one is a bit more of a gentle soul. A lot more shy, more of an introvert and defiantly glued to you in his younger years. Razlo doesn’t 100% understand his interest as he gets older but he does try, in fact his shy nature reminds him a lot of Livio which makes him a bit protective of your youngest. in all he ends up being a great dad
Legato
Does he want kids? No.
•Now listen, you need to understand, this man did not have a good childhood, in fact he didn’t have a childhood.
•He doesn’t have any experience with kids and the way he was treated as a child...yeah he’s got a lot of trauma around the whole concept of children as a whole, and honestly it’d have to be pretty far in your relationship for him to even be willing to be physical enough with you to even have the chance to conceive a kid.    
•so no he doesn’t want kids. 
•but lets say accidents happen and somehow the two of you are a bit careless and you end up pregnant 
•oh boy are you ready? Because Legato makes me really sad. He’d be a bit distant during your pregnancy, he doesn’t really know how to feel about all this, he never imagined himself as a father and now...
•When your baby is first born (a little boy) you’re going to have to do all the care. It’s rough but honestly with his trauma? he’d be scared to death to touch his kid. He’s paranoid. He knows what he went through and he’s scared. What if he hurts his kid? What if the same thing happens to him? In reality he’d never and I mean never hurt his kid but it’s a common for this kind of paranoia in victims of the type of abuse Legato suffered.
•It’s a rough couple of first years but after some reassurance (and therapy! please get this man therapy!) He slowly comes around. No matter what though he’s protective. Like I said he knows how cruel humanity can be, and even in the first years with his paranoia he’ll be damned if anyone hurts his little boy. In fact he might go a bit over board and refuse to let anyone even touch him or pick him up besides you
•Once he settles in though...it’s not so bad. He slowly warms up to him, admittedly it’s a bit rocky at first. To your little boy Legato is a bit of a stranger living in the same house of him since Legato refuses to let himself get too close, but give it time and they’ll slowly bond.
“I’m told you like to read?” “...yeah” “maybe...I could give you some of my favorite books? would you like that?” “...okay.”
•Don’t worry!!! the two end up okay. Despite the less than ideal start, Legato gains more confidence the more he interacts with his son. Especially since they have a lot of the same interest. At the end of the day Legato realizes something, he want’s to give his kid the childhood he never got to have.
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fellthemarvelous · 6 months
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Warning: I use sarcasm when making points.
I have things to say. (And I'm going to be extremely snarky while saying them.)
Y'all, I love Crowley just as much as anyone else, but the way some people think that defending Crowley means it's necessary to villainize Aziraphale is just gross.
Yeah, Crowley is super easy to sympathize with. We all care about him.
But like...some of these Aziraphale hate takes are insane. (And no, haters, I don't actually want to hear from you unless you want to give me even more fodder to work with.)
"Aziraphale shows compassion for everyone except Crowley." (Actual footage from the very first episode, just to name one example, but okay. I guess sheltering someone who was supposed to be his mortal enemy under his wing was a senseless act of cruelty.)
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"Aziraphale doesn't love Crowley." (Wait, I totally utilize my heart eyes for people I don't love too!!)
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"Aziraphale has never actually trusted Crowley." (They only helped save the world together though. Weird. And then there was that time in 1941 where he trusted that Crowley wouldn't shoot him in the face while their miracles weren't working.)
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"Even in second season when Crowley says "I'm a demon, I lied" Aziraphale doesn't think of Crowley's pain, he was busy being sad for himself. Before this Aziraphale even says "I'm like you now" as if being demon is worse thing than killing innocent children and animals." (Whatever the hell this is.)
This one is just really special. Congratulations on walking into the point and somehow missing it at the same time? That's exactly what makes the system so fucked up in the first place and why Crowley doesn't tell anyone that Aziraphale lied to Heaven. This moment wasn't about Crowley. It was about Aziraphale. Crowley knows the pain and trauma that comes with falling and he doesn't want Aziraphale to experience that?? Aziraphale is allowed to be scared and sad because like, I don't know if you know this, but when you've been indoctrinated into blind obedience, going against the grain is actually really fucking scary because the punishment is terrifying. This is why so many religious abuse survivors relate to Aziraphale?? Also, a demon like Hastur would have killed the animals and the children, so....
"I can not in my sane mind think that Crowley could ever trust Aziraphale with his trauma. He would never share anything that was done to him. Because chances are if he did, he would just be invalidated and belittled. Or worse, he would have been blamed even for it since he is a demon and that's what he deserves (which Crowley already believes to be true)." (What?!?!?!)
Aziraphale, most compassionate and kindest angel there is, would mock Crowley's pain? The same Aziraphale who has been mocked and abused (verbally, mentally and physically) by his superiors would turn around and do the same thing to Crowley when Crowley is the only one who has ever understood him? Aziraphale, the angel who gave the demons a chance to walk away from his bookshop without being hurt, would mock Crowley? Aziraphale, the same angel who had to sit there and listen to Shax mock him and belittle him relentlessly while he protected Jimbriel, would invalidate Crowley?
"Aziraphale only loves Crowley as an angel and not a demon." (Yeah, look how disgusted he is...planning a whole ball just so he could hold hands and dance with his demon. Eww.)
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"When Crowley asks for the holy water instead of asking for why he needed something that was so dangerous he immediately jumps to conclusions and then hurts Crowley even more."
I mean other than the fact that we saw what happened to Ligur in season one when he got doused with the holy water, I can't imagine why Aziraphale would be so hesitant to hand something like that over to the love of his life. And he finally did hand it over, knowing he would never be able to forgive himself if Crowley did use it to end his own existence. Not to mention that Hell actually did plan to kill Crowley with holy water at the end of season 1. I would totally jump at the chance to give someone I love something incredibly dangerous to them, but I guess I'm built differently. 🙃 And who cares about Aziraphale's feelings on the subject anyway, am I right?
"Crowley has no reason to trust Aziraphale." (I know right? Aside from the time Aziraphale gave him the holy water even though it scared him or the time he used a human magic trick to save Crowley from having to go back to Hell again or the time he protected Crowley's identity by playing along with Bildad the Shuhite so Heaven wouldn't know he was actually a demon or all the times Aziraphale has offered Crowley sanctuary in his bookshop or when they performed their half miracle together or when they literally swapped bodies.)
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"Aziraphale chose Heaven over Crowley because he thinks Crowley is beneath him." (I mean he sacrificed his own happiness to go back to Heaven too, but why bother exploring that when we can all just hate Aziraphale for doing what he thinks is the right thing to do? What even are shades of grey?)
Like I get it. I do. Aziraphale leaving was very upsetting because we wanted to see the Ineffable Husbands get their happy ending. But whenever I see people talk about how rejected Crowley feels, like Aziraphale feels rejected too. You get that, right? And I'm not saying he was right for asking Crowley to go back and become an angel again, but he wants Crowley to be safe and he mistakenly believed it would be that easy.
Just because Aziraphale has a lot to learn doesn't mean he's wrong for going back. Just because Aziraphale has flaws doesn't mean he's bad. Crowley isn't the only one suffering and heartbroken.
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And we all saw that the Metatron gave him no time to begin grieving over what just happened. Instead Aziraphale turned around, put a smile on his face that didn't reach his eyes, and stepped onto the elevator because he is going to try and make changes even if he has to do it all alone.
How would revolutions get started if people saw no point in trying to change things for the better?
I leaned into bitch mode in this post. It happens.
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birdiesaves · 16 days
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THE MARTIAN ( novel by andy weir ) change as necessary !
mankind reaching out to send people to another planet for the very first time and expand the horizons of humanity blah, blah, blah. 
i’m pretty much fucked. 
they got the parades and fame and love of the world, i got a firm handshake and a hot cup of coffee when i got home.
i would only be “in command” of the mission if i were the only remaining person.
what do you know? i’m in command.
it wasn’t your fault. you did what you had to do. 
in your position i would have done the same thing. 
it was a ridiculous sequence of events that led to me almost dying.
everyone thinks i’m dead. 
ok, i’ve had a good night’s sleep, and things don’t seem as hopeless as they did yesterday.
i won’t be able to whip something up with tinfoil and gum.
fear my botany powers!
but hey, time is the one thing i’ve got.
i wonder if they'll ever find out what really happened.
i’ll spare you the math. the answer is _________
bleh. i’m going to bed
my life depends on you
i played a lot of dungeons and dragons.
i have an idiotically dangerous plan 
i suppose i’ll think of something. or die.
the answer is: i don’t know.
all i accomplished today was thinking up a plan that’ll kill me
also, i have duct tape. 
after a search of everyone’s personal items i found my answer.
that was sarcasm, by the way.
this all sounds like a great idea with no chance of catastrophic failure.
do you have any idea the magnitude of shitstorm this is gonna be?
how come aquaman can control whales? they’re mammals! 
i expected it to be cold, but jesus christ!
now, on to my next task: sitting around with nothing to do for 12 hours.
i ask for a picture and i get the fonz?
the whole world’s been rooting for you. 
really looking forward to not dying. 
please watch your language.
sorry we left you behind, but we don't like you.
you're sort of a smart-ass.
your request for “anything, oh god anything but disco” is denied.
no. you’ll fuck it up and die.
i took it apart, found the problem, and fixed it.
i don’t see anything... i can hear it, but... it’s down here somewhere, but i don’t know where.
the subtle and refined “hurl my body at the wall” technique had some flaws. 
named after the greek goddess who traveled the heavens with the speed of wind. she's also the goddess of rainbows.
i'm not giving up. just planning for every outcome. it's what i do.
your poster outsold the rest of ours combined.
why are you such a nerd?
you should try to be more cool. wear dark glasses and a leather jacket. carry a switchblade.
you started my training by buying me a beer.
so now i have to do boring-ass experiments with test tubes and zzzzzzzzzz....
frankly, i suspect you're a super villain.
just once i'd like something to go to plan, ya know?
no? ok... what was that!? oh, nothing? ok...
for now i just want to go home.
there's always hope
are we just watching a tragedy play out?
you’ll survive this. i don't know how, but you will. 
i've defiled enough historical sites for now.
tomorrow night, i'll sink to an all new low!
tomorrow night, i'll be at rock bottom!
be a smart-ass to a guy seven levels above you. see how that works out.
i remember when you were shy
the attitude comes with the job
and by “enjoying” i mean “hating so much i want to kill people.”
there aren't many people who can say they've vandalized a three billion dollar spacecraft. but i'm one of them.
what's our role in all this? if something goes wrong, what can we do?
how do you come up with this shit?
i admit it's fatally dangerous, but consider this: i'd get to fly around like iron man.
i need you to come back in and make a bomb.
i knew that guy was a mad scientist!
i think we should just go with my iron man idea.
well if you won't let us then- wait... wait a minute... i'm looking at my shoulder patch and it turns out i'm the commander. 
give me a minute. you're the first person i've seen in ______.
i think about the sheer number of people who pulled together just to save my sorry ass, and i can barely comprehend it.
i represent progress, science, and the interplanetary future we’ve dreamed of for centuries. 
they did it because every human being has a basic instinct to help each other out. it might not seem that way sometimes, but it’s true.
yes, there are assholes who just don’t care, but they’re massively outnumbered by the people who do. 
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