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#And then they're turned to a 180° and they do shit that they'd never do and we're left confused like abounded children
dmclemblems · 1 year
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A couple things confuse me about the "Edelgard was never the Flame Emperor in Hopes so that's why people are acting differently with her" thing people try to say to explain GW and SB.
1) 3H almost never makes it a narrative focus that Edelgard was the Flame Emperor, just that the Flame Emperor as a separate entity was bad. Barring Dimitri, barely anyone says "hey wow, Edelgard sure is a giant fucking asshole since we know she's the Flame Emperor" - they're more like "wow, can't believe she smeckledorfed us like that, not based and kinda cringe." So many people go "I don't wanna fight her tho, I regret having to fight her :/" as though the fact that she clearly never gave a shit about any of them, proven by her lying about being the Flame Emperor for damn near a year, doesn't mean anything to them. She's still their beloved classmate, no matter what she does to a lot of them, so I don't see why it's only now that they'd suddenly give THIS much of a shit about something they never put focus on before. And to the extent that they'd 180 on their characters just to be chill with her.
2) What actual, substantial difference is there between "I am willing to torture my citizens by turning them into Demonic Beasts," and "I will torture my citizens by slowly starving them through my war that is draining away the country's food supplies"? She is still needlessly and cruelly making her people go through suffering, just because it isn't as loud as Aegir mindlessly pillaging shit doesn't mean she isn't still responsible for mass suffering and death of her own citizens. And this isn't even getting into the rest of Fodlan either, who she is similarly ruining/ending the lives of in similarly cruel, torturous ways. But it's not specifically Demonic Beasts or specifically with TWS, so suddenly she's fine? It's morally acceptable for certain characters to join her for no reason other than her (lying) words? Hell, being a pragmatic, amoral asshole for a second - at least a weapon's being made with the Demonic Beasts method of slow and cruel death, the starving citizens do no good for anyone!
I dunno, just seems like a pretty thin straw to reach for to explain why certain characters (WINK WINK) act so wildly OOC :/
Preface after writing: I'm sorry, this is stupid long and two months late. I hope it being stupid long makes up for the wait. :D... :'D...
Yeah, the Flame Emperor portion of her character has nothing to do with Hopes. Between both games, Dimitri treats her completely differently because she didn't do the same things and he has a very direct attachment to her and TWS both, but other characters don't just like her more because she wasn't the Flame Emperor.
For example, Dimitri never spirals into the mess he became in Houses because Edelgard never hid her identity, and the Flame Emperor was very openly allied with TWS. Edelgard in Hopes broke off her ties with them as soon as the game really begins, i.e. post the prologue (in all routes, but you only see it actually be discussed in her route).
I do agree it's a flaw in the writing that they kind of switch on the whole "the Flame Emperor is a bad person" to deciding they don't agree with that anymore once they know who it is. What she did doesn't change just because she was "someone else" at the time, the same way Dimitri's actions don't change just because he was "someone else" for those five years. Difference being, there are actually allied characters who hold Dimitri accountable for it, and Dimitri holds himself accountable too. Just another instance of the writing making women wound like saints because they gotta sell their merch. I'm saying that as a woman, mind you, and it's frutsrating that gender dictactes how a story gets written. Gender also doesn't define someone's personality and who they are, so it shouldn't make a story geared around uwu waifu not bad, we don't wanna fight her.
The thing is, this is one of the problems people have with the narrative of Houses is not committing. It's true that Edelgard didn't care about a lot of people because she explicitly didn't let herself care, because she went into the year fully expecting and being aware of her inevitable "betrayal" (which I quote because she didn't really intend to be friends with them to begin with, so in her view it's probably not really a betrayal. It would be to them, but not so much to her).
It's also true that she decides to "care" about people who side with her simply for siding with her. Unfortunately the writing can't commit to kepeing her consistent as a character because they don't want her to be the villain because it's harder to market villains. That is, in part, why TWS exists, because they're meant to be the 'true villains".
Basically, TWS exists to make Edelgard look better as a person. Since they made her look pretty and cute, they didn't want to commit to making her a more villainous person, despite openly saying in an interview that they made her the villain. If she were a man, they would have made her more of a villain.
Regarding Houses and her evils:
The characters are sad about classmates being their enemies, but they set aside all the bad things as soon as they know the ringleader is a woman. Remember how they all considered her a horrible villain who had to be taken down when they knew her as the Flame Emperor? They thought the Flame Emperor was a man. As soon as it turns out that, that very same person was a woman they uwu went to school with, they don't think he's such a horrible villain who needs to be taken down anymore.
The point of the first half of Houses is that you're involved in all these happy academy days (as far as their relationships go, less so about the missions and stuff). They all trust each other and see each other as people they will one day have to work alongside. Suddenly they find out a pair among the students were plotting against them and weren't really ever on their side. The people they met in school were, in some ways, "fake". They weren't their true selves because they were in enemy territory the whole time (even if they were safe there, but in their minds these were enemies).
Like, personally, would I feel bad when I found out these people were lying to me the whole time and planned to kill me one day if I didn't agree with them? lol no. The characters went from thinking her actions were horrific to "well let's hear her out because she's actually our friend, even though for being our 'friend' we actually know nothing about her and our 'friend' lied to us the whole time".
Regarding Hopes and her supposed lack of evils:
In Hopes, even though none of that is there, it's still true she lied to them and was their enemy. It's still true she started a war and did all the same things from there, and in fact, some of it she actually had to do herself because she broke off with TWS. This includes trying to invade the Kingdom, which Cornelia was the one to do and succeed in doing in Houses. However, Edelgard herself, and the might of the Empire, is canonically not enough to subdue the Kingdom in Hopes. This does mean, however, that she had to do the deeds herself and cou;pdn't hide behind anyone else.
Breaking it down for why she seems less evil in Hopes though, we have SB. Technically both the Empire and Alliance took on the Kingdom, meaning that the Empire alone couldn't handle it. Reminder that, Dimitri, Dedue and Felix all survive SB, so the Empire can't take down three of the strongest fighters in the Kingdom (so less people die, because in SB she's not allied with TWS and does nothave the strength given to her by them, such as the beasts). Ingrid went out specifically to die because she planned to fight as long as possible so Dimitri could get away, meaning she never intended to survive that battle. Sylvain went out in a fit of rage seeking revenge for Ingrid, so his head wasn't on straight and he wasn't fighting with his brain, but his emotions.
Could they have taken these people down otherwise? Sylvain, no. He's too smart. If he wasn't so angry he would have backed off as soon as he realized he was overmatched in that battle. He wouldn't have died there because Dimitri wasn't there to die for, and neither was Felix. Also, he's not nearly as suicidal in this game. If he wasn't seeking revenge, he wouldn't have died, plain and simple. Could they have beaten Ingrid normally? No, because similarly, she would've retreated if she didn't go into the battle planning to fight until she died. She would've left to continue protecting her friends, home and king.
What this means is that she looks less bad because less people died, meaning her war killed less named and beloved characters. The difference though is that it doesn't make her less evil - it just means that alone, her might isn't capable of taking these people down. She needs to be allied with another army to win her war, which is why she took with TWS in the first place in Houses. Since they wanted her to look better in Hopes, she ditched them... but that means she still needs allies for her war. She knows she can't take down the Kingdom alone and they're allied with the Church, and she knows she can't take down Rhea because Rhea is a dragon.
Then there's GW, which just makes Edelgard look FUNNY. It's Claude who has to invade the Kingdom, because she can't break through the west front. Even after Claude fights in Fhirdiad, she still can't take down the west front. This means that, not only did the Empire have people do their bidding for what they weren't strong enough to do, but they had to take any other matters into their own hands for what TWS wouldn't help with in this story. It means Edelgard had to dirty her hands because they weren't there to do it, and she just wasn't strong enough to win her own war.
Remember, in SB, she doesn't win her own war. Her enemies kill each other, and the Kingdom is weakened because she allied with another army to fight them because she doesn't have the strength to do it herself. She looks less evil in Hopes because, being totally frank and not even saying this out of a hatred for her, she's weak. She's too weak to actually win and conquer, and she looks worse if she wins and takes control of all the lands she stomped on to win. When she loses, she looks better because she's not the tyrannical leader of all of Fodlan. In Hopes, no matter what route you're on, Edelgard does not win the war and does not achieve anything with her own army's strength. In CF, she does win because her allies are TWS for the entire game and they're only defeated post game because the game's duration is her war, which she needed them for the entirety of to actually win.
In GW, she doesn't win the war. She doesn't defeat Rhea, instead leaving that to Claude, who had Shez in his army (and was probably the only one with the actual power to rival Rhea's, for obvious reasons).
This also is why the kingdom survives and is never taken over. In Houses, it was never Edelgard's strength that conquered it. However, it does mean every single thing that happened in the war was on her head, because there was no TWS to take the fall for her the bad things that happened.
How it looks on her character:
So, looking at it from both ways, to sum it up... why are they so upset that they have to fight their classmate, who lied to them and was faking around them? Why are they upset about fighting her when she's been doing all this stuff in the war by her own desires and orders? There's no getting mad at TWS for what she does.
The Empire when pitted against the Kingdom can't win without allies, and Edelgard presumbly knew that in Houses and had allies - TWS. In Hopes, she gets Claude on her side because she can't do, well, jack shit to the Kingdom without him. Without something unexpected in the mix (the Alliance in Hopes, TWS in Houses), the Kingdom's strength is enough to defend.
Since TWS are her enemies in this story, she never actually wins. She doesn't lose, but she doesn't win. The only reason she doesn't lose is because she allied with another army (who she was canonically losing to in both routes anyway).
So basically, how do the writers make up for Edelgard not teaming up with TWS here? They have her use the Alliance instead, making her look better for not siding with TWS. To make her look even better, they have TWS do horrific things as a third party to it all, independently fucking around and making Edelgard have to go stop them. It makes TWS look like the worst of all scum, and it props up the "less evil" villains.
In GW, Claude does shady shit because ??? and that also makes Edelgard look better because she's very up front and doesn't do tactics the way he does. She's very forthright and if she didn't want to ally with the Alliance, she would have said as much and not have teamed up with them to stab them in the back later. Instead, that's given to Claude because, well, let's face it, it makes him look worse than her. She also gets no flak for killing Rhea in this game because she can't, because she doesn't have the power TWS gave her. She fights Rhea, certainly, even with Shez's power... but it's not enough. Rhea survives everything you do and only dies against Thales.
So basically, Edelgard is just weak and incapable of winning in this game, and it makes her look better and nicer, since she doesn't have the ability to use Demonic Beasts. The characters feel like upset because she did "less evil" things and killed fewer people (again, because she's not capable of doing so).
And again, I'm not even saying that out of hate. Edelgard admits they needed TWS in CF if they were going to win the war. Consequently, she doesn't win the war in any route in Hopes because she splits off from them in all routes.
No, it doesn't make her a better person or more worthy of people's pity, but they used Claude as a means of having someone else do worse things than her to make the characters doubt Claude while believing wholly in Edelgard for being so forthright. Since TWS is worse than Claude, it makes a tier of "bad", and she's at the very bottom of it. Thus, the characters see her in a better light and don't want to kill her.
Other stuff:
In AG it's actually kinda interesting, because even though the Empire has fallen because of Thales, literally nobody pities Edelgard for the situation she ended up in. Nobody feels bad about it and nobody thinks man, we should save Edelgard, she isn't the one who made the Empire fall into ruin like this. They still understand she's the one who started this war and enabled enough of a situation for TWS to take advantage of it. She gave them the opening instead of fighting them in the first place.
Even if you went along with her strategy of siding with the Church to take out TWS, but then she betrays the Church and starts her war against them because she also sees them as her enemy, that would have been the most reasonable strategy. Side with the Church, take out the strongest enemy first so they can't run around wreaking havoc while you ignore them to fight your war, then deal with the Church after when they won't have distractions and a potential other enemy creeping up on them.
Point being, it was stupid to start a war against the Church after simply driving out Thales from the capital. She should've waited to start the war until they'd taken out TWS completely. Why didn't they do this? Because they needed TWS in the story to make her look like a better person. Removing them too soon would mean she can't go back and stop their destruction. She can't seem like the better person because there's nobody worse than her. By making her strategy, well, let's face it, incredibly stupid to the point even Hubert told her outright not to do it/that he didn't agree with it, it made her look, well, honestly, dumb... but a better person in the long run.
Like I said, in AG it's done in a more interesting way because her situation doesn't get pitied by anyone. The people loyal to her are still loyal to her, but that's about it. None of her enemies feel sorry for her. None of them see that her war brought about something bad on her (i.e. being controlled by Thales) and went awww poor thing. She reaps what she sows and faces the consequeces of both starting a war and not being smart about it (i.e. dealing with TWS altogether at the start or remaining allied with them until the war was over like in CF). The characters in AG see it for it was, and Edelgard had to have known that there would be potential consequences of doing what she did.
Even at the very end, Dimitri doesn't pity her when she her mentality reverts to a child's. He doesn't feel it necessary to stain his hands with her blood at that point because the war is over. If she was still a threat they would defeat her but she wasn't, and she also didn't have any memory of starting the war, so killing her would be for nothing but personal gain, which at that point Dimitri didn't have. If anything, it might have staved off even more more because the emperor would be returned home safely, and possibly even by Dimitri (because I can't imagine the Church would do it after she declared explicitly on them, and I doubt Claude would even care to do it because he has no history with her like Dimitri does) or someone he trusts.
The Empire would need to focus on dealing with what happened to her, and they wouldn't be in a position to keep fighting or even need to since the person who wanted the war doesn't even have the memories leading up to why the war was started. All they could really do at that point was take care of her and decide what to do about leadership (and in this moment, we're going to prefend Ferdinand wasn't killed offscreen. They didn't say he was, so he wasn't! Got it? Yeah? Great!).
This last part doesn't really have much to do with your ask, but I wanted to add it in as a contrast to the way SB/GW were written and how they did make her seem like a better person than Claude. They made it seem like she was less bad for doing whats he did with her own hands this time because there was no TWS to do it for her. AG flips that on its head and says no, we don't care that she ended up in a bad situation because she brought it on herself. They said no, we're not going to pity her just because someone worse than her came along because she still did what she did.
Imo AG was just a much more refreshing and realistic take. They didn't look at her and see uwu classmate. They looked at her and saw the woman who started a war and knew what she was doing. Just because she lost in her own war and just because someone got the jump on her didn't make her worth pitying.
Instead, we get a wholly satisfying conclusion to the Duscur story, whcih was completely dropped in AM and probably because they ran out of chapters. We can bring a literal army of victims from that tragedy with us and have them be able to face the person who caused all of it. Since Duscur was also allied with Faerghus for a long while at this point, it wraps up that storyline in a nice, neat bow. The only thing left is to assume that things with Duscur went well and that Claude determined starting a new war over the Church just wasn't worth it.
Claude post AG (in contrast to him in the other routes):
Yes, I think Claude considered taking advantage of an existing war to fight the Church and might have done so in Hopes if Edelgard wasn't out of commission, because if she wasn't the war would continue. However, the war was over right then and there and more fighting on his part would just be a really stupid move that would turn everyone around him against him.
The war ended, the person who started it lost, and the third party was defeated. People would not want to fight another war just because Claude doesn't understand Fodlan at all in this game. Quite ironic that Edeglgard's rhetoric to him in VW about not knowing enough about Fodlan to lead it was completely true in this game... or maybe they did that on purpose to make her look better! Again! :D :'D
So yeah, Claude didn't start another war after AG ended. I say that, of course, assuming AG Claude has a brain and knows how to use it. Also, I don't think he would want to make enemies of the Kingdom at that point. If his goal remained to bring people together, he had already succeeded in getting every territory on the same page by allying with the sides opposing Edelgard in the first place.
The only people left are the Empire's people, who weren't in a position to fight and would probably just agree to an allying sort of truce so that all of Fodlan was on the same page. Even without Hubert or Ferdinand, they have Waldemar, and he's smart enough imo to make the right moves there. Claude has no reason to start a new war/renew an existing war that just ended when now that there's no war to just jump into to use as an excuse for something, he can just use words and his presumably route working brain to figure out how to work with the Church. Like, you know, he does in VW.
#this is two months late im so sorry ahjfgsahfd#also I recall it being somewhere in Houses that she knows their army can't win their war alone#hence allying with TWS. her army needed their power to actually get through her win#and I recall her saying that she has to wait to fight them specifically bc she needed them for the war#i.e. she knew if she ditched them too soon that she wouldn't win#that's what made her route sound initially interesting in Hopes bc she did ditch them#but it also proved her points in CF that she didn't have the strength to win the war she started#she was losing to the Alliance in GW and SB both iirc#the best way to win her war would be - well - to ally with someone better than her in strength#get the strong people on her side to fight her war for her bc she can't do it. TWS was also that in Houses#however in CF she actually wins while allied with horrific people. it makes her look worse#in SB she doesn't win no matter what route you're on and allies with normal people#in CF she crushes TWS after the story but she ultimately has an ending that expresses oppression#her ending mural and the fact that she started a war and destroyed all opposing powers is the evidence of that#in Hopes she crushed... nothing. nobody. her enemies crushed each other bc Rhea determined that TWS#was a much worse threat /for Fodlan/ than Edelgard was and so chose to die fighting Thales#presumably she figured whoever was left in Fodlan could deal with Edelgard later without her help#i.e. Claude and Dimitri who are still alive in one version of SB and Dimitri who is still alive in the other#so either way in SB there will ALWAYS be opposition to her war because /she will always be stuck between not winning or losing/#she doesn't get to win and be the big bad leader of Fodlan. it makes her look like a better person#ALSO (him in the other routes): is perfect bc it made a frowny face JKDGUJGF LOL#DCE Ask
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steelycunt · 2 years
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what do you think the lupins think about sirius getting disowned? ofc hope wouldn’t know the history behind his family, but would that change anything in lyall’s mind about his opinion of sirius? and how would hope handle it? I imagine she would try to be as welcoming as possible, not just because it’s in her nature and she would have done that anyway, but also because there’s more on the line since she wouldn’t want him to feel turned away by her (lyall… a diff story isn’t it). also, I don’t think she would see it as “he got disowned by a powerful wizarding family” but rather “he got turned away by his own parents” yk?
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hello hello 2 u both!! to some extent my thoughts on this depend on how well they really know sirius when this happens, which i imagine to be--not very (at least in lyall's case--i reckon he kept his distance from sirius as remus' friend, but had less of a choice about this once sirius was remus' boyfriend). also--im not sure when they'd find out? would remus tell them? i definitely dont think he'd tell them about stuff like the prank, though admittedly this isn't really a similar thing.
anyway, going off the basis that they find out around when it happens, i agree with first anon that hope would be very welcoming about it (though she always would be), and probably wouldnt have had a dissimilar reaction to the potters if sirius had turned up on their doorstep rather than james', despite the fact that the lupins definitely have less money and means with which to take in another sixteen year old boy. seeing as she isn't familiar with the noble and most ancient shit surrounding sirius' family, her perception of sirius would pretty much always b shaped by remus' relationship with him, and therefore she trusts that he's a good person + friend who's had a shite deal. so as u say, in that situation she just sees a boy whose parents treated him so poorly that he had no option but to leave, and therefore feels a need to make it clear that he is loved + welcomed in their home and would probably be even more on lyall's case about the way he thinks of him.
i don't imagine lyall to have had many run-ins with sirius at this point, honestly. i can't imagine he's been to their house that many times, and so its one of those dad situations where you can have a bestfriend for six years that you regularly mention at home and your dad has still only clapped eyes on/spoken to them like...twice, in all that time. nevertheless, he's heard of sirius' family, and that's largely responsible for how he views sirius (+ the fact that he views sirius...negatively). i think he only really starts meeting sirius for himself more regularly once he's dating remus, and for the sake of this conversation we're going to say that's after sirius is disowned, though it could well be before. as for his view on it...at first i honestly don't think he'd care much. i can't see him doing a sharp 180 on his view of sirius, the same way he couldn't have done a sharp 180 on his view of werewolves after remus was bitten. i imagine initially he sort of thinks, well, ok, he's disowned, but that doesn't necessarily mean he's any better than them. it could well just mean that there were disagreements within the family or he didn't want to live up to his role as heir or they're all just horrible people, and sirius removing himself from that situation does not necessarily, as far as lyall is concerned, demonstrate some great difference in character between him and the rest of his family. lyall is constantly wary of the danger that pureblood families like the blacks + their ideologies pose to his son, which massively affects his (rather dogmatic) attitude towards sirius. he accepts sirius' friendship with remus, he's never going to do anything to try and intervene there, but he never quite trusts him.
i think this is roughly his initial view, but over time + particularly after r/s start dating, and become adults who live together + it becomes undeniable that sirius intends to make a life with his son, lyall gradually accepts that sirius must actually be alright, and that there must actually be some differences between him and his family that were reflected in his being disowned as a boy. by now they aren't really going to see each other all that much anymore anyway, but he does definitely make his peace with sirius and his intentions towards remus.
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Hahahahaha, good to see that both "Supernatural" and "The Walking Dead" were ruined by their creators and broke the hearts of their fans all over the world, how nice!!!!
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Jimmy & Janis
Jimmy: never seen a kid 😢 at a haircut Jimmy: before you say owt, it ain't even done yet so it don't look shit Janis: Poor Bobs Janis: bribe him with sweets after like it's the dentist Janis: I can get some on my way back Jimmy: throw him at your family pinging and well mad fer the party 😂 Jimmy: tah for the invite lads Jimmy: 👍 Janis: you know Janis: can't get him on the pre drinks so Jimmy: I'll set him up with a shot glass full of fizzy pop Jimmy: sorted Janis: 🙌 Janis: party don't stop Janis: what about Twix Janis: she'll feel left out Jimmy: 🎶 or start til you walk in, babe #obvs Jimmy: 💔🐶🎻 Jimmy: I'd reckon on letting her trash the place but that's any day she's left alone for 1 sec Janis: Naturally Janis: why else would I need to be there so bad Janis: she's just bored #relatable Jimmy: life and soul, my dear Jimmy: you and your true love wasted on this place Janis: sad but #truthbomb Janis: [sends him socials of the decor that are already up] Janis: I know I've been telling you but seriously Janis: see and believe and prepare Jimmy: fucking hell Jimmy: too late to ask 💀👑 to be your date instead or what? Janis: hmm Janis: would probably be my easy ticket out Janis: and she'd be thrilled for so many reasons Jimmy: crack on then Janis: 😒 Jimmy: come on, no challenge in it Janis: only a further challenge on my sanity, like Jimmy: turn round, I've sent the orchestra after you Jimmy: Bob's gonna save you a tissue an' all Janis: lovely Janis: just one he's not blown his nose in, tah Jimmy: 👌 Jimmy: buy us 🚬 when you're at the shop Jimmy: 🤞💀💀💀 Janis: sure Janis: death pact sounds good rn Jimmy: right there next to you, Juliet Jimmy: headfirst off the balcony if nowt else Janis: honestly Janis: love to fuck up their marble floor Jimmy: least if you play up enough you might get a new pony out of it Jimmy: fuck knows where we'll put it but the kids will be #buzzing Janis: piss off Janis: don't even like horses Janis: or you Jimmy: I know that's bollocks, rich girl Janis: glue factory, both of yous Jimmy: 💕🐴 Jimmy: 💕😎 Jimmy: I'll buy you a heart shaped locket when our #truelove turns 1 Jimmy: space with pics for all your faves Janis: 😒 Janis: I'll throw it into the ocean Jimmy: 💔💔💔 Jimmy: gonna make me 😢😢 too Janis: s'alright, draw a masterpiece and I'll share the door Janis: don't hate you either, not completely Jimmy: every bit's a masterpiece with you as my muse, baby Jimmy: 🥇🎨 Janis: gonna get whiplash if you keep doing these 180s boy Jimmy: get you out of this party, won't it? 😘 Janis: your plan all along Janis: 💔 me so I've got a get out of jail free card Janis: not worked for Gracie, like Jimmy: gotta be 💕 to get 💔 Janis: she was Jimmy: bollocks Jimmy: our fake was realer than that Janis: not with him, obviously Janis: 💀👑💕 Jimmy: 😂 Janis: you know it's real Janis: as real as she gets Jimmy: a love story to rival me and my ex that one Jimmy: bout as many break and make ups as we had too, like Janis: I wouldn't try and console her Janis: never get away Janis: more 😭 than the kid Jimmy: I can't 💪 and 🤐 you said Jimmy: I ain't cuddling her Janis: better not Jimmy: not in my 💰💰 party clothes, tah Jimmy: wouldn't be 💋 on my collar, it'd be half her face Janis: 😂 Janis: you have no idea Jimmy: I'm not trying to find out what she #wakesuplike or owt else Jimmy: 💔 Gracie I know Janis: 😏 reckon she's over it, babe Jimmy: 👍 Janis: 💔 I know Jimmy: 🎻🎻 Jimmy: [sends selfies that Bobby has taken of himself post haircut] Jimmy: heartbreaker not heartbroken now he is Jimmy: he needed you to see ALL 23 of them identical pics so he reckoned Janis: He looks so good Janis: very 😎 Jimmy: using every bit of my 💪 to stop him taking my phone to give you a bell Janis: n'awh he can if he wants Janis: am at the shop so get your order in Jimmy: [cute little phone call moment including Jimmy telling Bobby to ask her to buy all kinds of silly stuff cos nerd] Janis: [so cute, when they'd all be used to each other now and like a mini fam soz ian not soz] Jimmy: [even Cass would like Janis by now, such a squad, fuck off Ian] Janis: [get her something for dinner just in case 'cos too cool for this party obvs] Jimmy: [and we know Ian ain't gonna give a shit as long as he's okay himself so] Janis: actually 😍 Jimmy: how soon can we palm him off though? Jimmy: doing my head in if he ain't yours Janis: so mean, you Janis: go 'head and wish for this party to start tho Jimmy: you're alright Janis: mhmm Janis: this is gonna be a disaster, not even a funny one Jimmy: what's the scale? Janis: you wanna hear about the worst party this family has ever, like? Janis: 'cos you need to give me like 3-5 working days to work that out Jimmy: just working out if today's the day for us to say yeah to drugs instead of nah or if decimating Ian's drink supply before he gets back will do Janis: no doubt they'll have it out like hors d'oeuvres Janis: rich people Jimmy: what the fuck are them? Jimmy: I know that weren't paddy lingo but you still lost me Janis: party food Janis: pineapple and cheese on a stick but make it 💸 Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: brush some edible gold leaf on it Janis: exactly Janis: make some poor cunt in a tux hand it out Janis: they aren't quite that level, well Janis: I don't think they'll have 'staff' anyway or 🤢 Jimmy: could've had a word for me, babe Jimmy: bit rude Jimmy: missing out on a lot of tips to be there Janis: if you really wanna make it weird, I'll pay you myself Janis: idiot Jimmy: I've been waiting ages to unlock that final kink of yours Jimmy: 💪🏆 Janis: There you go then Janis: all comes out Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: 🥇 Jimmy: really cheered me that has Janis: you'll forgive me for the hors d'oeuvres then Janis: so glad Jimmy: put a bit more work in and I might Janis: you work, I pay Janis: silly Jimmy: 🤤🤤🤤 Jimmy: keep giving them orders, girl Janis: 😏 Janis: if we didn't have somewhere to be Jimmy: we don't yet Janis: no, but you can't actually ditch bobs Jimmy: I'll throw him at Cass for a bit when we get back, she's getting time off later Janis: True Janis: not above it but not ideal getting drunk enough to deal in front of him, like Jimmy: I'm texting her now Jimmy: and we're on the bus Jimmy: be home well soon Janis: 👍 Janis: race you there Jimmy: piss off I ain't driving the bus Jimmy: that ain't fair Janis: if you ain't up to the challenge Janis: 😂 Jimmy: leave it out or you ain't getting your present Janis: locket? Jimmy: not what I've got in my pocket right now but I love that you're thinking long term Jimmy: very keen you Janis: 🤔👀 Jimmy: you gonna guess or what? Janis: 🍾 Janis: umm Janis: did you get some shampoo Janis: idk Jimmy: my subtle hint that you need to sort yourself out, like Jimmy: not that much of a dickhead Janis: I've got no clue Jimmy: Are you telling me you wanna shower with me? 'Cause not fuming about it Janis: I was thinking where you was last but you know Janis: can't show up stinking can we Jimmy: If getting kicked out is the goal, probably should Jimmy: but I Janis: wanna give me my present Janis: I get it Jimmy: and you want it off me Janis: yeah Janis: I do Jimmy: you're so Janis: you Jimmy: [sends her a fire sext because always and any opportunity] Janis: Jimmy Jimmy: what? Janis: just Janis: be here now Jimmy: just wait for me Jimmy: won't be as long as it feels Janis: I miss you Jimmy: I want you Janis: as soon as you're back Janis: 'til the last possible minute Jimmy: Yeah Janis: didn't want to go but now I really, really don't wanna go anywhere but the shower, like Jimmy: Ian ain't there to bang on the door, it's alright Janis: 😏 maybe he's just trying to keep us in time Janis: helpful, really Jimmy: sounds proper fake that Janis: probably Janis: just tryna spread those posi vibes Janis: you know me, babe Jimmy: such a ray of sunshine you Jimmy: what I'm always telling people that is Janis: awh, who you talkin' 'bout me to, boy? Jimmy: the 🌏 babe Janis: 😍 #thatdemotho Janis: you spoil me Janis: that my gift, yeah? #freepromo Jimmy: you got me Jimmy: know the way to your 💘 Janis: just can't quit being goals, can you Jimmy: 💕 Janis: be here now Janis: I'm done waiting Jimmy: Hang on, I'll throw the driver off Jimmy: only a few stops Janis: probably distracted with his 😍 Jimmy: if the kid weren't here everyone on this bus would be Janis: 💔 that Janis: actually Jimmy: has Cass shown up at ours yet? Jimmy: I told her to take him out Janis: yeah Janis: her mates here too they're raiding the cupboards Jimmy: that lad again? 🙄 Janis: alright, dad Janis: nice of you to pop in 😂 Jimmy: piss off Janis: you're so cute Jimmy: you're a dickhead Janis: don't get aggy with me Janis: I ain't got my mans over Jimmy: Mia be round any sec though, will she? Jimmy: make myself scarce for a bit then Janis: 🖕 Janis: so funny, you Jimmy: save that for her Jimmy: 💕 Janis: the fakery? Janis: sure Janis: I'm a pro now Jimmy: that and the hand gestures Janis: easy now Janis: not tossing her off Janis: and it's a different gesture, anyway Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: trying to tell me I've been doing it wrong, are you? Jimmy: first I've heard Jimmy: and very subtle of you, mate Janis: 😂 Janis: you know Janis: been thinking how to bring it up and now seemed like the perfect opportunity tbh Jimmy: you'll have a perfect opportunity to show me how I can do better in a bit Janis: it's a date, loser Jimmy: 👌 Jimmy: [showing up cos why not do a lil skip lol] Janis: just chilling in the kitchen with cass and her mate like hey] Jimmy: [100% her mate is the Tyler kid in my head lol but yeah don't be rude and kick them out immediately, do pass the sweets Janis got round tho shameless bribe which reminds me her gift was a lollipop he swiped from the hairdresser for well behaved kids cos drunken throwback they don't remember but we do so he can give her that too like] Jimmy: [Bobby showing everyone his hair and loving life P.S] Janis: [love that, being shamelessly buzzing 'cos about those nerdy gestures forever and you get to be #seductive on the low] Janis: [get it bab, you look fresh] Jimmy: [could not resist and never will bye] Jimmy: [that little kiddo being less shy fuck me up] Janis: [get your confidence live your life bb] Jimmy: [making everyone a cuppa even though you want them to fuck off #northern] Janis: [when you're rood (but not really) so you're like we've got to get ready bye] Jimmy: [only so much eye fucking and accidental touching and seduction via lolly you can handle before you g2g] Janis: [truly, in that shower boys] Jimmy: [casually really long shower soz not soz Ian] Janis: enjoy that waterbill] Jimmy: [then actually get dressed and get drinking but it's obvs still flirty af] Janis: [the vibe, 'cos don't need to dwell on what a non mood this party is] Jimmy: [literally he'd be distracting her so hard, so many kisses it'd be a miracle that anything else gets done, lowkey helping each other dress just so you can keep touching and being soft] Janis: ['you look good' 'cos he did despite the dresscode] Jimmy: [does a drinks cheers because thanks and also she does too we know it] Janis: [cheersing with glee 'cos a few drinks in and being with the bae you don't feel completely like kms] Janis: ['not as good as Bobby but you know, you'll do'] Jimmy: [runs his hands through his hair dramatically cos got a lil trim but nothing worth mentioning and doing a pouty face for the pisstake 'take him then, I'll stay here'] Janis: [hugging him tight like no] Jimmy: [hugging her back as tight just because and hands in her hair likewise and more kisses just because] Janis: ['I promise I'll make it fun' 'cos sorry to be dragging him into this mess but gotta lol] Jimmy: ['If I'm with you, I'm having a good one' cos true even in this instance ultimately] Janis: [literal sincere hearteyes] Jimmy: [give them right back so its a moment] Janis: [just snuggling like 'let's run away okay'] Jimmy: ['alright, we're decently dressed for life on the run' but being soft with your touches cos you want to as well] Janis: [sniffs, 'yeah, new identity ready, like'] Jimmy: ['forgot your former name already, me'] Janis: [lols 'be more believable if you hadn't been saying it so much in the shower, boy' 😏] Jimmy: ['soz, I thought you only wanted me mute at the party, like' 😏 Janis: [makes face like no and a 'n'awh' sound 'I don't want you like that, you just ain't gonna have nothing to say to 'em, me either, like'] Jimmy: ['I don't wanna say nowt to 'em, just you' no offense fam but that's the tea] Janis: [nods 'cos same and not like she's that bitch to say you must lmao] Jimmy: [tops both their drinks up because that speaks for itself] Janis: [drinking and snuggling] Jimmy: [enjoy the alone time while you can kids] Janis: [just telling him about the 'decent' (bit rude) kids that'll be there for bobby to play with] Jimmy: [he'll be having a lovely time at least] Janis: [and at least as bouj as they are it's not like they're most fancy house 'cos he's still in school so can't be living fully lavish] Jimmy: [makes me lol god bless those extra bitches] Jimmy: [let's say he puts music on for them cos kids could be back any time and wanna stay in their own bubble as long as they can] Janis: [throwback to all those times, appreciated] Jimmy: [casual playlist of all those van hook ups lol] Janis: [if anything is gonna get you in the mood tbh] Jimmy: [enjoy it kids] Janis: [in your new bed bowchicka] Jimmy: [that for once isn't full of a pup and a kid so it still feels as small as a single usually #rude] Janis: [hope you've not put your fancy clothes on yet lol] Jimmy: [dressed and undressed haha priorities] Jimmy: [Jimmy'd be like me and not put them on til the last min in case they get messed up] Janis: [sensible, better than turning up all awry like what you been up to 😏] Jimmy: [they don't need the pisstaking today fam they're trying to stay in a good mood] Janis: [just like 'fucking obvs wbu'] Jimmy: [don't ask if you don't wanna know tbh] Janis: [truly, how long are we giving you lads before Ian's back being a hoe] Jimmy: [give 'em long enough to enjoy that new bed and be a few more drinks in but yeah he should probably appear soon to give him the most time to be a knob before they get be like oh bye Ian lowkey maybe they think it's the kids coming back so they're like alright cool they're earlier than we expected so loads of time to get Bobs ready but then no, it's that fool Janis: [when you're lowkey like should I stay in here 'til we're ready to go 'cos Ian hates you lol] Jimmy: [she should if only so they can type to each other for a bit] Jimmy: 🙄💀💀💀🙄 Janis: real life and soul has arrived Jimmy: can you hear us celebrating down here? Jimmy: 🎉 keep it down, knobhead 🍾 Janis: been to plenty parties like that Janis: but Ian, the vibe is 💎💎💎💋🌸🌺🎀 Janis: get with it Jimmy: 🍀 standard fare that, be why he fits right in on this street Jimmy: you don't wanna take him in my place then? Jimmy: 💀👑 gonna be thrilled to still be 🥇 like Janis: they should date Janis: start an anti-fan club for me Janis: cute 💕 Jimmy: stop trying to make me vom Jimmy: so kinky you Janis: tryna save you, babe Janis: sure she's dead distracting Janis: soz sue or whoever it is rn Jimmy: I'll take her over Mia as my new mum tah Janis: she will find her in Janis: stop fighting it, boy Jimmy: Take your own advice before you hand it out to me, mate Janis: 🤐 shh Jimmy: 💕 Janis: she's coming for his 👑 in the dickhead stakes though so maybe it won't work Janis: too much competition 💪👎 Jimmy: what like there can only be 1? 🍀 town's full of twats Janis: ask her, she'd tell you Janis: don't share the throne, babes Jimmy: hang on, I'll slide in her DMs for a change Jimmy: shock might 🔪🔪💀👻 Janis: 🤞 Janis: needs distracting from her story rampage Jimmy: ? Janis: ugh, usual Janis: now her and gracie aren't bffs forever she don't have to hold back with slaggin on her and spilling all that tea, sis Jimmy: 🙄🙄🙄 Jimmy: rather have this twat in my 👂 than eyes on that bollocks Jimmy: tah Ian Janis: tell him it's his turn to say something nice now Jimmy: 👍 Janis: 🔊 I'm waiting Jimmy: take your turn, he's skipping his Janis: About Ian? Janis: Hmm Janis: he makes cute kids Janis: I guess Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: come and get the little one, he needs to get ready not hear this shit Janis: 👍 Janis: [does and gives him a subtle shoulder squeeze as she goes] Jimmy: [runs away as soon as he can cos you know Cass is good for making Ian kick off/taking his full attention so they could just get Bobby ready and be cute though you can tell Jimothy is forlorn]] Janis: [not saying anything but keeping Bobby chatting and hyped about this party and showing him pics of relevant kids so he won't be as shy to meet them] Jimmy: [just 😍 cos that's so nice and so cute and he is full of love] Janis: [just smiling at him and doing lots of subtle small reassuring touches] Jimmy: I love you Janis: I love you Janis: fuck the rest, yeah? Jimmy: yeah Janis: [gives him a sneaky kiss 'cos kids be like ewwww lol] Jimmy: let's just go Jimmy: if not to the party yet just Janis: 'course, all dressed up like Janis: kid needs an audience rn 😎 Jimmy: bit rude if our kid's just taken 1000s of pics of you on that old camera I let him have Jimmy: my muse not his Janis: there's enough inspo to go around baby Jimmy: weren't a challenge but take it as one any time you like, girl Janis: [posing for Bobby and pulling all kinds of faces whilst getting one of his jackets on like let's ride] Janis: what challenge Jimmy: [counts how many poses/faces she's doing casually] Jimmy: you owe me a photoshoot later Jimmy: see what you reckon then Janis: see what you reckon when I hit you with my hourly rate Janis: owes me so many sweets, that one Jimmy: Nah, rich girl, I work and you pay Jimmy: your words them Jimmy: [we on the move though fuck you Ian and good luck being stuck with that Cass] Janis: [seriously that'll be fun for you both lowkey] Janis: you think I'm gonna pay for the pleasure? Jimmy: as long as you feel it I don't give a fuck if you don't get the cash out Jimmy: but we can keep that between us Jimmy: #golddigger if anyone asks obvs Janis: 'course Janis: why else would you be with me Janis: just keep that off the 'gram, naturally Janis: [walking and talking with Bobs, obvs, sneaky convos ftw] Jimmy: I'll put the list on the 'gram in a bit Jimmy: let you know, like Janis: how very goals of you Janis: even if you're gonna have to ignore me to write it, like 😏 Jimmy: fuck that, it basically writes itself Jimmy: [a look cos so in love bitch] Janis: you look good Janis: did I tell you Jimmy: might've done Jimmy: I need to tell you Jimmy: come here Janis: [moves closer like hello] Jimmy: [whispering all these compliments and generally hot af things in her ear like] Janis: [when you nudge him like excuse me but it's just an excuse to snuggle into his side, we see you] Jimmy: [soz baby bobs but we gotta do another sneaky kiss here that may or may not be that sneaky soz again] Janis: [he'd be less grossed than cass and we all know it] Jimmy: [yeah and he's probs using his camera on himself/the scenery as they walk along anyways so] Janis: ['how's it feel having a mini-me?'] Jimmy: [shrugs cos used to it 'better than it'd feel Ian having one' cos that's the tea] Janis: [nods like ain't that the truth] Jimmy: [when you openly snuggle into her side without any excuse cos ugh he's the worst and you know he's been saying shit as standard] Janis: [taking your hand out of the pocket to hold his 'another pro of Mia, she's definitely infertile, no more Ians ever'] Jimmy: [little lol because you can't even help it] Jimmy: ['imagine the school lunch she'd pack, tah mum'] Janis: ['those appetite-suppressing lollipops are well kid-friendly'] Jimmy: ['do need this kid off my hands to have a smoke though so if you could give her a bell now that'd be decent'] Janis: ['um, cigarettes are the OG appetite-supressors, HELLO!' taps his head like think on but gestures like, you want me to go ahead with him or] Jimmy: [pulls her closer to him and holds onto her dramatically because no #bantsbutalsotherealest] Janis: [doing that half walk half dance you have to do when you're holding onto each other and still moving for a while 'cos not going] Jimmy: [giving her the realest intense don't leave me look before you can stop yourself because the neediest softest boy ever bye] Janis: [just looking back not faltering 'I ain't gonna leave you alone with 'em, if only for the purely selfish reason I don't wanna be alone with 'em either'] Jimmy: [a hug moment that he really needs and is made cuter by Bobby joining in cos they a lil fam] Janis: [love a group hug moment, live your best life, ain't no one stop you, especially not Ian bye] Jimmy: [shakes his head at himself like get your shit together now boy] Janis: [puts Bobby's shades down for him 'cos cool kid and mimics the same at him like you got this babe] Jimmy: [a wonderful hand squeeze of thanks and hand holding the rest of the way] Janis: [squad roll up honey] Jimmy: [let's do this lads, take a deep breath before the pink hits you but] Janis: [literal deep breath as if you're not gonna do your best to do the bare minimum of socializing before finding a cosy corner] Jimmy: [god bless, can't even shade you two cos its gonna be so awks, I can so clearly hear and see Venus' dad's extraness like] Janis: [as much as she's 😒 at least he's met cali enough for that to not be unbearable just keep rio away lowkey lol] Jimmy: [we all know they are gonna take a smoke break the first chance they get full offense everybody but could be worse cos grace is lowkey tipsy af already so] Janis: [just exchanging a look but not a sexy look with him like okay and we were pre-drinking] Jimmy: #whitegirlwasted Jimmy: you might've taught me that but she's reminding me Janis: 😂 Janis: she's an education in all things white alright Jimmy: 👌👌 Jimmy: [okay but Jimmy chatting to Indie cos she's brought Astrid and he's got Bobs and remember when he was like 10/10 would bang lol] Janis: [just off securing that bitch vodka] Jimmy: [take it girl you're gonna want it] Janis: [talking to Rio (and Buster and Venus' dad etc) without him 'cos you wanna keep her away 'cos embarrassing] Jimmy: [he's just settling Bobs in but he's got loads of kids and hippie brother so he's buzzing unlike most of these guests] Jimmy: 👍 Janis: all good? Jimmy: you alright? Janis: you know Jimmy: 💪🏆 Janis: that's about the gist of it, yeah Jimmy: what are you drinking, girl? Janis: that's a poor excuse for chat, boy Jimmy: shut up Jimmy: do you want one or what? Janis: obviously Jimmy: 🏃 me Jimmy: hang on Janis: you offered Jimmy: [brings her that beverage and knocks their glasses together] Janis: ['careful, wouldn't wanna spill anything'] Jimmy: [gives her a look because she wanted to spill their blood on the marble not that long ago lol] Janis: [shrugs like what] Jimmy: [shrugs back like what cos always] Janis: [🙄 and dranking] Jimmy: [we all drinking] Janis: this is so ugly Jimmy: it's 💎💎💎💋🌸🌺🎀 Jimmy: get it right babes Janis: my point still stands Jimmy: smack me, I'll get a clashing colour nosebleed and we'll have to leave Janis: alright, sounds fun Jimmy: #kinkunlocked Janis: you wish Jimmy: when I blow out the kid's candles in a bit you'll have to do it 👸 Janis: [does mini lol] Jimmy: 🚬? Janis: [starts heading out in response] Jimmy: [following the bae] Janis: ['we shoulda got another pack' as she's tapping two out, like no time for sharing] Jimmy: [gives her a playful look like literally you had one job 'I'll go in a bit' but obvs he means on the way back he's not just gonna leave her lol] Janis: ['I'm an optimist, I didn't think it'd be this bad, sue me' 😏] Jimmy: [little lol 'why we're such a good match, duh'] Janis: ['for now, anyway'] Jimmy: [💔 with his hands] Janis: ['believable'] Janis: [does 👎] Jimmy: [does OTT sad face and fake crying like is that better?] Janis: ['if you want sympathy you gotta aim it at your new, not your old' taps her head, like Jimmy: [👍 IRL like tah for that] Janis: ['in you go' shoos 'cos so polite] Jimmy: [playfight moment cos oi] Janis: ['stop it' but a LOOk obvs] Jimmy: [a look back like make me cos distract yourselves with being flirty af kids] Janis: [shakes her head 'I'm busy' takes pause to inhale to prove point then exhales 'ask your friend instead'] Jimmy: ['which one, got so many friends, me'] Janis: [just makes face like you know] Jimmy: [makes a face back like no I don't] Janis: [rolls her eyes but not agressively so add the smirky face, like, 'good job you're pretty, babe'] Jimmy: [bats his eyelashes at her in an OTT way and makes a kissy face, it's almost like Grace is in the room lol] Janis: [makes a vom face and pushes him away 'no, you're dumped, get out'] Jimmy: [hair flip and walk away but not far away thanks] Janis: ['technically, half of these are yours' and shakes the cigs at him] Jimmy: ['not til you say yeah to tying the knot, babe, today the day?'] Janis: ['obviously, this-' gestures around '-is all I really want'] Jimmy: ['obviously'] Janis: [shakes head and sighs, 'least bobby's having fun, like'] Jimmy: [nods because that's the best he could expect as an outcome tbh] Janis: [kicks at his shins but softly not actual 'cheer up'] Jimmy: [is all like oi cos fancy clothes but not actually mad obvs 'alright, challenge accepted'] Janis: [looks at him expectantly] Jimmy: [hits her with a 'what?' as standard] Janis: ['come here, idiot'] Jimmy: [does of course] Janis: [sneaky garden makeouts forever] Jimmy: [take what you can get kids, probably gonna have to go back in before too long] Janis: [Astrid probably having a meltdown so you gotta go in to check on the kid you brought lol] Jimmy: [Indie just gotta leave with her so the numbers are dwindling #awks] Janis: 💔 Jimmy: 🎻🎻💔💔🎻🎻 Janis: really should've scaled this back, all things considered Jimmy: but the 💎💎💎💋🌸🌺🎀 Jimmy: actually would be 💔 Jimmy: it's a 3 💎 event, girl Janis: for who Jimmy: everyone #obvs Janis: I repeat Janis: who Jimmy: your horse would be feeling it if you'd brought her along 👸👑🐴💕 Janis: can't bring a horse for a date Janis: not that kind of horse girl Jimmy: 😂 Janis: gutting, I know Janis: not even afer the honeymoon Jimmy: might be a challenge too far competing with 🐴🍆like, 💪🏆 as I am Jimmy: so you're alright Janis: 😂 Janis: no amount of 🍀 gonna help you Janis: 🤷 soz Jimmy: 💕 meant to help me, Juliet Jimmy: choose me 😍💘 Janis: you've always said how much I love horses so Janis: how could I Jimmy: 😭😭💔💀💀💀 Jimmy: on you go then Jimmy: 👋 Janis: Missed a perfect opportunity to go with fuck you and the horse you rode in on Janis: which is why I already dumped you so Jimmy: missed a perfect opportunity to leave with Indie an' all but I've still got the orchestra to see me out Janis: 🎺 'cos you're not funny Jimmy: bit rude Janis: have we met Jimmy: dunno, my mrs does have a very different #aesthetic Janis: lucky her Jimmy: she's going out with me, she's well lucky #duh Janis: mhmm Janis: I'm gonna politely smile 'til you go away now Jimmy: 👍 Janis: can I trust you not to spike my drink, creeper Janis: too many of my family members are congregating and I can't Jimmy: no need, give it a bit and you'll do the work of being gone yourself, lightweight Janis: fuck off Janis: how you gonna say that when she's stood right there Janis: barely Jimmy: you want me to start comparing you and her? Jimmy: not that thick or ready to 💀💀💀 tah Janis: Changed your tune Jimmy: so fickle me Janis: clearly Jimmy: keeping up with you, I reckon Jimmy: am I dumped or your #goals boyfriend bringing you drinks and whatever else your heart desires? Janis: you wanted the gig Janis: tux sadly not included Jimmy: [obvs brings her drinks tho cos needs them himself anyway] Janis: ['cheers'] Jimmy: sláinte pisshead 💕 Janis: be nice Jimmy: you Janis: I am Janis: so nice Jimmy: 👌 Jimmy: where? Janis: [😒] Jimmy: go on, get your #receipts out Janis: why are you being a dick for Jimmy: what are you on about? Janis: [😒 and an actual pout not the emoji kind] Jimmy: [gotta kiss that pout soz fam] Janis: [not soz, claim this corner lads] Jimmy: [being really nice to her rn like come back to meeeeeeeee and be my friend again] Jimmy: [I like to imagine Grace being a salty single from afar] Janis: [when you're so over this whole mood you ain't even arsed about the attention your PDA will get either way] Jimmy: [likewise only care about the bae and making this more bearable for her so soz but not soz at all actually] Janis: ['sorry' when you take a sec 'cos actual] Jimmy: ['it's alright' cos it is and not just saying it] Janis: ['it's stupid but' shrugs 'cos what can you do 'soon as they cut the cake, I swear'] Jimmy: [just snuggling her cos he'll be here as long as it takes and so much love] Janis: [just forgetting your rep and being soft for a sec] Jimmy: [#ultimategoals 5eva nobody else exists bye] Janis: ['I actually fucking love you, you know'] Jimmy: [when you're kissing her but you can't stop smiling the whole time because always gonna get you when she says that] Janis: ['I mean it' not like she doesn't think he believes her but 'cos she do and that's crazy if you ever stop and think about it which they clearly don't #nochill] Jimmy: [giving her the most intense heart eyes cos he knows and it's so mutual] Janis: [just snuggling] Jimmy: [let them have all the moments I am unrepentant af] Jimmy: [just whispering all the nice things to her like how much he loves her and how important all of this is to him etc because he could be saying anything fam its not for you] Janis: [when your face probably looks like you're #scandalized but really it's 'cos it's not saucy and that gets you harder] Jimmy: [if you didn't wanna leave before you really do now so you can just be properly alone gdi] Janis: [gonna have someone cockblock, probably one of your parents trying to talk to you like now lads okay lol] Jimmy: [rude but real] Jimmy: do you wanna just fuck off for a bit after this? Jimmy: catch a train or a lift like Janis: yes Janis: always, like Jimmy: nobody'll be at the caravan if they've all had to come here Jimmy: don't have to be there though Janis: a good base if nothing else Janis: but we can go anywhere Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: have to drop the kid back first, change out of this shit Jimmy: can grab the dog if you're both gonna be 💔💔 Janis: can't you bring the braces 😏 Janis: hmm, maybe Janis: the less responsibilities we leave for Cass/Ian, the less arsed everyone will be Jimmy: depends, are you taking the piss or what? Jimmy: and yeah but that don't mean I'm taking the kids meaning he'll still need me to leave classic FM blasting for him Janis: Would I do a thing like that Janis: you know you still look fit Janis: 🎻 obvs Janis: don't want him to enjoy himself ever Janis: just not ban me and 💀you Jimmy: stop looking at me like that or you'll 💀 me Janis: I can't help it Janis: not my fault everything else in here is offensively 🎀🌺🌸💎💎💋 Jimmy: 💕 Jimmy: love you too Jimmy: and how impressively you backhand them compliments Janis: gotta keep you grounded, babe Jimmy: then, as I said, stop looking at me like that, babe Jimmy: #groundednotintheground Janis: you're so Janis: make everyone go away Jimmy: how many bathrooms does this place have? Jimmy: let's hide in one for a bit Janis: more than one Janis: and there ain't enough guests here that they need to be queuing Janis: come interrupt so I can show you Jimmy: [does and can because has never been here before so legit wouldn't know where to go] Janis: [off you run children] Jimmy: [someone'll come find you if they need you for birthday things and you aren't back so take all the moments] Janis: [also none of you are stupid you know what's happening so leave 'em for a hot sec tbh] Jimmy: [mhmm all of y'all have pull these same tricks at some point and we know it] Janis: [exactly dr phil] Jimmy: [do we want skerries again or somewhere different?] Janis: [should go somewhere different why not] Jimmy: [yeah I'm thinking get the train/hitchhike until they are fed up and then just get out cos destination ain't the important bit] Janis: [a mood] Jimmy: [feels real even they come back tomorrow, being gone long isn't the point either really] Janis: [exactly, it's just about leaving]
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