#Also can we talk about how beautiful Orlando Bloom is in these movies

[scarlettjohanssons-mistress]

My sweet little girl

Warnings: Fluff, soft smut?, mentions of other celebrities,

Word count: 1.3 K

Pairing: Eva Green x Fem!Reader

Special request: @wandamaximoff2823

Requests: OPEN

Prompt: Y/N goes to her first party surrounded by celebrities, amazed by her surroundings, but, with a naive soul, she is unaware that a big celebrity is trying to flirt with her.

When her girlfriend Eva finds her, I couldn't help but feel my blood boil.

[Main masterlist] [Actors and actresses masterlist]

The dress was tight enough to obstruct my breathing a bit, the heels hurt my feet, the makeup felt too heavy, and my hair was too still thanks to the hairspray. Ultimately, I did not feel comfortable.

But seeing my beautiful girlfriend, the great actress Eva Green, posing in front of the cameras, proud of having won her first Oscar; and, in short, I would be capable of this and more, just to see her smile from her that way

"Are you done with the photographs, miss smug?" I asked her as soon as I saw her approach me

"Yes, now I just want to get home, and receive my grand prize, because, I remind you that you owe me my prize" she took me by the waist, while she began to spread kisses on my cheeks, making me laugh

"Are you crazy, Green?" asked her former co-star and friend of her, Orlando Bloom, who came hand in hand with his wife of him, singer Katy Perry. "You just won an Oscar and you don't want to stay for the party?"

"Baby, leave her alone"

"They're right, honey, you worked very hard for that statuette, I think you deserve a break"

“But I can rest with a book…”

Suddenly, Orlando's arm rested on my girl's shoulders and he began to guide her to the exit .

"Don't worry, Y/N I'll take her to the party, you guys have fun while I keep an eye on her"

We both watched as our partners disappeared from our sight while we laughed

"Are you going to change?" the singer asked me, as we followed in the footsteps of the guys

"The truth is, we did n't plan to go to the party, so, no."

"Well, don't think I want to sound rude, but, you look like a middle - aged woman, tired even of breathing" we both made fun of her comment "come, join me , we will give you a second spectacular look"

——————————————————————————— 

When we got to the party, Katy wouldn't even let me look for Eva, she just led me to a table full of celebrities, from Rihanna to Scarlett Johansson herself, who were drinking and talking gushingly.

"Hey guys, I've got fresh meat"

All eyes fell on me , and questions began to arise.

I was born in a country that these people had only heard about, I studied such an ordinary career, I grew up with ordinary friends; I never stopped being the extra of a great movie, until one day, I traveled to France, for work reasons, and one day, I got lost in the great city of Paris, until I collided with a beautiful French woman, who helped me get to my destination, of course, while stealing my heart.

So, I was new in the eyes of Hollywood, her questions were understandable.

Questions like, 'Where did you meet your girlfriend?', 'How do you feel in Hollywood?', 'How well do you and Eva get along?'

"Wow, let the poor girl breathe" Katy made me sit at the table, while putting a large glass full of liquor in front of me "Come on girl, being the couple is also tiring and you deserve a break"

They all agreed, so I took a big drink, earning myself a few screams and even a wink from Scarlett.

——————————————————————————— 

Eva narrates

Orlando and his friends of him were beginning to wear me down. Even though I didn't consider myself a clingy girlfriend, I was beginning to miss my girlfriend, so, expecting an oversight from the guys, I ran out of the table to start looking for my girl.

Until I found her, by chance, dancing in the arms of Scarlett Johansson herself.

I did n't think of myself as jealous either, but seeing how another woman kept approaching Y/N, trying to touch her de ella, and even whispering things in her ear, made my blood boil.

With quick steps, I approached Y/N, startling the girl, along with the blonde next to her.

"Sorry to interrupt, but I need to talk to my girlfriend."

Scarlett did n't even dare to look at me, she just let go of Y/N's waist and left, so I took Y/N's forearm from her and took her to a quieter place.

"I think it's time to go"

"Eva I…"

"Let's just go Y /N, I want to go to the hotel"

"Sure, I'm just going to say goodbye to the guys and…"

With a light squeeze on her hand, I stopped her.

"No, let's just go , please"

“It's okay”

——————————————————————————— 

Arriving at the hotel, I quickly took off my shoes, while I watched as Y/N began to untie her hair, leaving her with long, silky hair.

"Why did we leave so fast ?"

"Are you going to continue to play dumb, knowing that I saw you flirt with Scarlett Johansson?"

We both started taking off our dresses.

"So what was he doing with her hands on your waist?" I began to walk until I reached behind her back

“We were just dancing”

“You know, princess, I think you have forgotten who owns you. Because, you're mine , right?

"Yes my love"

"Do you think you need a lesson?"

"Yes baby"

“Ohh, my sweet little girll”

I took her wrist, and carefully, we moved to the bed.

She, wearing nice underwear, lies down on the bed, slowly and delicately, while I sat with her chest between my legs.

With a slight movement, I took her leg, lifting it up to my face, to start kissing her calf.

"You smell so good, and you're so pretty, so pretty and all mine, you're still, and I'm all yours, right princess?"

"Yes, baby, you are mine and I am yours"

As I continued to kiss her leg, my left hand began to walk up to her lightly bra clad breast .

"Do you want it hard and rough or soft?"

"Easy, baby, I want to go slow"

"Perfect, safe word?"

“Pumpkin to increase speed and marshmallow to stop”

"Oh honey, you're so smart"

I dropped her leg, while dropping my own body next to Y/N's, to start kissing her fleshy pink lips, with all the love in the world, passionately and sensually. I carefully began to lower my lips to her jaw , her neck and her clothed breasts, making her let out a moan.

"I love listening to you"

Although, there were times when obscenity prevailed, today, I just wanted to worship her, she had endured everything from awkwardness for her wardrobe, an almost eternal ceremony, a party full of drunks, and the last thing she deserved was to endure my unnecessary jealousy .

She clothes started to get in the way of her beautiful body, so, with one hand gently holding her jaw, I had the other hand start unbuttoning her underwear.

"Eva" Y/N let out a light moan, making me stop

"What's wrong, princess?"

"Can you tie my feet?"

Y/N got up slightly, to take a long pink ribbon from the table next to the bed, surprising me a little, while making me let out a small laugh.

"Oh sure, baby. Everything is to please my sweet little girl"

——————————————————————————— 

With short, unsteady breaths, we both lay down on the bed, smiles on our faces.

"That was…"

"Incredible?" I asked

“I was going to say, it was the Crème Brûlée of the night” we both laughed , as Y/N lay on my chest and I started kissing her bare shoulders “despite the little mishap with Scarlett Johansson”

"Yeah, speaking of which, I'm sorry baby, I shouldn't have let my jealousy ruin our night."

"Ruin the night? Am I talking to the same woman who brought me to orgasm on more than 4 occasions?" we both laughed again

"You know what I mean, silly"

“Eva, you just have to understand that there is no one more perfect than you , my eyes cannot see beyond your beautiful face, because despite being separated, my eyes will always find that beautiful face, and my mind will always be there. cloudy of you”

Now she got up , to give me a long kiss, full of love and affection, showing with every pore of her skin, the love she has to give.

“Have they told you that you are very cheesy”

"Now you really ruined the moment"

Note:

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[peonierose]

#10 from the fluffy dialogue prompts 💕

Aww thanks beautiful 😍😍😍😍

This made me so super happy you have no idea. I hope you’ll like this little drabble 😍

When those period cramps call my name

Book: Open Heart

Pairing: Bryce x Luna

Summary: Those stupid period cramps 🙈

Rating: Fluff

Words: 1,500+

1st Author‘s note: Thank you to @songsaboutgirls for choosing this beautiful prompt 😍 ”I‘d really like that good morning kiss now.“ It will appear in bold and in color. Happy reading 💚

2nd Author‘s note: A major major thank you goes out to @ofmischiefandmedicine who actually gave me the idea for this fic ❤️ You’ll find the word ”my little ketchup packet“ in the fic. Thanks for our brain storm session and for making me laugh so hard I almost doubled over (in a good way 😂😂😂)

I’m lying in bed, when I feel the bed dip and Bryce lies next to me. His deep voice next to my ear.

”Good morning sunshine. I’d really like that good morning kiss now,“ he smiles

I pull the comforter over my head and grumble

”No good morning and please no sunshine. And no kisses. Just darkness and Johnny Depp. Or Keanu Reeves I’m not picky,“ I retort.

”What am I chopped liver?“ he gasps at my reply and leans closer

I groan again

”Please B can you be gross somewhere else?“

Bryce winces

”That was harsh. I have feelings you know,“ he sounds hurt and I immediately regret my words

”I know and I’m sorry my little sparkle fairy. It’s these fucking period cramps. And I just want it to stop. Why can’t pain killers work faster?“

He scoffs

”Do I look like a sparkle fairy to you? You know what? Don’t answer that. Also do you want me to answer as a doctor or as your fiancé?“

”As my boo,“ I mumble

B jumps off the bed and says

”Alright. It’ll soon be better. Promise. In the meantime what do you want to do?“

Luna groans

”Lie in bed and watch Pirates of the Caribbean. With Johnny Depp and Orlando Bloom and Captain Barbossa. I need to laugh. Or maybe Scooby-doo? You know the movie with Kiss?“

He shakes his head at me

”Um. Why don’t we do a movie marathon? That way you can watch all of those movies?“

I laugh because he’s always succeeded in making me laugh even when I’m on my period like now.

”I could kiss you just for that and because you’re really cute,“ I say

He rolls his eyes but groans at me.

”I’d be offended that you called me cute instead of hot, but I’ll let it slide since you’re on your period,“ he says

I think back and realize

”You know you’re the first guy who isn’t weirded out by this. I mean it’s normal for me but some people get grossed out,“ I say which is true. So many people out there get grossed out when there’s talk about periods and cramps. Though it’s a normal process for me.

He snickers at that completely unimpressed

”I wonder how they would feel if they had to do surgery? Or give birth?“

I shiver underneath the blanket

”To be honest, I am scared of giving birth. Please don’t faint when it’s time,“ I ask him

”Who do you take me for? Sky? He’d be the first one to faint,“ he clarifies while teasing my cousin who’s had the…uhhh…let’s call it tendency to faint when there’s something ”gross“ involved.

”That’s not nice. But probably true. Please don’t tell him I said that,“ I sigh but I have to admit that B is right this time.

He winks

”Your secrets safe with me my little ketchup packet,“ he gives me one of his weird but cute nicknames.

I shake my head at him smiling all the while

”You’re so weird. But I love you for that. By the way do we have any chocolate pretzels and ginger ale left?“

He starts walking into our kitchen

”I’ll go check. Though there should be some pretzels left. Unless you ate them all,“ his voice sounds a bit further away.

I get up from bed and walk slowly into the kitchen.

”Look in my snack drawer,“ I point in the direction of said snack drawer.

”Your what now?“ he has a confused look on his face.

”You know a drawer that’s dedicated to all things snacky and good in this world,“ I say that as if that’s the most natural thing in the world.

Bryce is speechless, shaking his head at my replay.

When he opens a drawer he finds himself in literal candy land. From mini brownies, chocolate, candy, gum, anything a person with a sweet tooth could desire.

He whistles and gives me a look

”Do you want to tell me something?“

I shrug

”I told you I have a snack drawer,“ I say and steal an oreo from the open package.

He stands there dumbfounded and says

”That is not a drawer. That’s Fort Knox but in snack form. The only thing missing is your beloved apple pie,“ he’s talking about my favorite dessert on this planet.

I point my half eaten oreo at him

”If you look closer. You’ll find some small bite-sized apple pies. As Dean Winchester would say ”love me some pie“,“ I love quoting Dean he’s the best.

His brows are knitted

”I wonder who’d win in a pie eating contest you or Dean? Damn Lunes. My body would hurt from all this sugar. How can you eat all this junk?“

I sit down on the counter

”Well when I’m stressed, which is all the time, I crave something unhealthy. And that’s just right,“ I bounce my legs against the counter

”I might have to hide these somewhere,“ he goes on by saying

I squint my eyes at him and say

”Don’t you dare. If you don’t want to sleep on the couch from now on leave them where they are. Don’t think I wouldn’t initiate a no-sex rule,“ I say to him

He leans against the counter next to me and grins

”You’d ban that? Just because I said I’d displace your junk food?“

”You can bet your fine ass I would,“ I say that because let’s face it he does have a nice ass.

”So my ass is fine, huh?“ he comes closer

”Next to your eyes that’s my favorite part,“ I nod

He leans his elbows next to my legs caging me in

”Really? I thought you’d…

I blush at what else he’s implying

”Don’t,“ I hold out my hand

His grin is getting wider

”I was going to say you like my mind,“ he smiles

It’s my turn to roll my eyes at him.

”Right. But that doesn’t start with a p or with a d,“ I wink

He right out laughs at me

”For such a small person your head is always in the gutter,“ he steals a kiss as he says that.

I smile against his lips not wanting him to leave me so I pull him closer, since he’s taller that’s quite a feat.

”People who have a dirty mind have a lot more fun. I learned that from you,“ I say

”I think I taught you a little too well,“ he wriggles his eyebrows at me

I grin up at him

”So I bested the teacher? Score,“ I lift my arms up in victory.

”Let’s watch those movies and eat something,“ he sighs and says

I smiles at him

With a start I realize my cramps lessened a little.

”You know my period cramps aren’t so strong anymore. Thanks to you B. Because you always find the right words,“ I say grinning from ear to ear.

He smirks

”Be honest it’s my good looks right?“

Luna just shakes her head and he continues

”That’s why you asked me to marry you. Also I got dips on the chocolate pretzels,“ he says while we move into the living room to get comfortable on our couch.

I put a blanket over both of us.

B grabs a couple chocolate covered pretzels from the bag. Dipped in milk and dark chocolate.

I try reaching for the bag, but he holds it out of reach

”Hey no fair. I’m the one in pain,“ I say

”I’ll share them with you,“ B smiles mischievously at me.

”You’re such a softie,“ I smile and pat his cheek.

He puts a finger in my lips to silence me but I grin against his finger.

”Shh. Not so loud. I have a reputation to uphold,“ he whispers.

I grin at him

”Oh I’m going to tease you about this,“ I say getting better by the minute.

Bryce takes a chocolate pretzel and puts it in my mouth, so I’ll stop talking. I grin as I’m chewing on salty, chocolatey goodness.

What better is there than some snacks, movies and Bryce? Nothing can compare.

As the intro to Pirates of Caribbean starts playing I fully lean into Bryce. He takes my legs and tucks the blanket tighter around us.

”You have a little something there,“ he says and points to my cheek

He wants to dab it away with his own spit, but I lean back.

I lean away.

”Eww gross. Come on don’t do that,“ I say while laughing

”Now I can tease you,“ he says chuckling.

”There’s always another time where something embarrassing happens to you and I’ll be there to record it for future generations. So our kids can laugh about their dad,“ I say throwing a pretzel at him, but he catches it with his mouth.

”You’d do that? You’d show that to our kids?“ he says after he swallowed the piece of pretzel down.

”Sure why not,“ I say

”I’m so proud of you. I never loved you more,“ B has the sweetest smile on his face.

”Because I’d embarrass you in front of our future kids?“ I sound confused at his words.

”Yeah that way they’ll love me more. Because I’m fun,“ he grins

”Ugh. Rude. But sure deal,“ I say knowing that our kids will loves us equally. Okay maybe me a little more. You know the whole giving birth part?

Bryce kisses the chocolate from the corner of my lip.

I laugh at that and together we watch Elizabeth Swan get put into a way too tight corset. Uff poor woman.

I laugh at that. Fashion was weird back then.

But hey Jack Sparrow…errr…I meant Captain Jack Sparrow more than makes up for it.

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#prompt #I‘d like that good morning kiss now #Bryce x Luna #open heart #cfwc

[helie-brain]

Troy (2004)

I recently watched Troy again, and I have to say that I really love the film. I understand that it’s not the greatest film and that a lot of people hate it because it is a horrible adaptation from the Iliad. But does it deserve all of the hate. I mean if you take away the aspect that it is supposed to be BASED OFF of the Iliad, its a great movie. 

The sets are beautiful and impressive.  You feel, or in my opinion, like you are in the city of Troy. Even when it is being sacked, you still get a feeling of how large the city is. Talking about the sacking,  the movie, the directors cut version, did not shy away of depicting how violent the sacking of the city can be; children being burned, women being raped, people hanging and much more. The costumes, even if they may not be accurate, are very beautiful and looks like a lot of work was put into them. Same can be said about the weapons being used. 

The fighting scenes are gruesome, realistic, thrilling and well choreographed. Especially when it came to Hector and to Achilles, it definitely shows why they are the greatest fighters of their time. Without dumbing down the other fighters. For example Hector vs A-Jax, it was a really close fight, with both getting some good punches, but in the end Hector won. And while they were fighting, the rest of the soldiers were fighting and not watching them with amazement. But the greatest fight scene would have to be Achilles vs Hector, no cgi, no stunt men, just two men fighting to the death. 

The characters/cast themselves were great and memorable. You cannot think of Hector without thinking Eric Bana. He played him so well, whenever he talked it felt like an actual leader was talking. Brian Cox was perfect for the role of Agamemnon, at times he was the best part of the film. His outburst were never played as a joke and were never overly emotional. He was not a dumb villain who only had one goal, his moves were calculated and there was always another reason at play. Even Orlando Bloom did a great job at playing a naïve, entitled, most punchable face, which is what Paris was; a prince who stole another man’s wife and started a war that resulted in countless deaths. 

My favorite character would have to be Briseis, played by Rose Byrne. She is a stubborn, fearless, family oriented, somewhat entitled person, who doesn’t want people to die; Greeks or Trojans. And is willing to put herself at risk so others won’t risk there lives saving her. Not to mention I love her dynamic with Achilles. Speaking of which, Brad Pitt did amazing job at playing an annoying, arrogant, childish, warrior with a cheeky heart of gold. Yes I know that in the Iliad or other related books, he has a romantic relationship with Patroclous, but honestly I like the idea that he his cousin that he must watch over. In my opinion it adds more pain to Patrclous’s death; not only did Achilles lose someone he loved but he failed as a guardian. 

I liked that they didn’t add Gods to the film, even though they were a big part in the books. The reason is that the movie would then be more about the gods than the warriors. Meaning that the choices and actions the humans did would not be so impactful since it didn’t come from them fully but were swayed by the gods. Also we the audience would not have much a connection with the humans if we constantly had to go back and forth between the humans and the gods. 

But again nothing is perfect, there are things in the film that I have trouble with. The main one being pacing, I understand that showing 10 years would be somewhat difficult. But make the war last longer than a few days, that way you can flesh out more the relationships and the characters.  Also how passive Helen was through out the film; I mean Hector’s wife was taking care of her child, dealing with the lose of her husband and in the end saving Troy. Briseis was trying to stay alive in the enemy camp. Helen just seemed to be sitting there and only making small attempts to flee back. 

But in the end it’s a film that is BASED ON the Iliad. And the primary purpose of a film is to entertain. Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk. 

#troy 2004 #Achilles #Paris #Hector #helen of troy #Briseis #Briseis x Achilles #Greeks #Troy #Brd Pitt #Brain Cox #Orlando Bloom #Eric Bana #Rose Byrne #the iliad

[qqueenofhades]

If/when they make a Joe/Nicky prequel movie, what are some of the Dos and Don’ts for them, with regards to historical accuracy. Like, what do you think they should include, and what do you think they should avoid?

Oof. This is a GREAT question, and also designed to give me a chance to ramble on in a deeply, deeply self-indulgent fashion. That is now what will proceed to happen. Consider yourself warned. So if they were miraculously to be like “well that qqueenofhades person on tumblr seems like she knows what she’s talking about, let’s hire her to consult on this production!”, here are some of the things I would tell them.

First off, a question I have in fact asked my students when teaching the crusades in class is whether you could actually show the sack of Jerusalem on screen. Like... if you’re making a film about the First Crusade, what kind of choices are you going to make? What narrative viewpoint are you going to uphold throughout the story? Are you actually going to show a slaughter of Muslim and Jewish inhabitants that some chroniclers described as causing enough blood to reach up to the knees of horses? (Whether it actually did this is beside the point; the point is that the sack went far beyond the accepted conventions of warfare and struck everybody involved in it as particularly horrific.) Because when you’re making a film about the crusades, you are also making it by nature for a modern audience that has particular understandings of Christian/Muslim conflict, religious warfare and/or tolerance, the War on Terror, the modern clash over ISIS, Trump’s Muslim ban, and so forth. The list goes on and on. So you’re never making a straight, unbiased historical adaptation, even if you’re going off the text of primary sources. You’re still constructing it and presenting it in a deliberate and curated fashion, and you can bet that whichever way you come down, your audience will pick up on that.

Let’s take the most recent example of a high-profile crusades film: Kingdom of Heaven from 2005. I’ve written a book chapter on how the narrative choices of KoH, aside from its extensive fictionalization of its subject matter to start with, make it crystal clear that it is a film made by a well-meaning Western liberal filmmaker (Ridley Scott) four years after 9/11 and two years after the invasion of Iraq, when the sympathy from 9/11 was wearing off and everyone saw America/Great Britain and the Bush/Blair coalition overreaching itself in yet another arrogant imperial adventure into the Middle East. Depending on how old you are, you may or may not remember the fact that Bush explicitly called the War on Terror a “crusade” at the start, and then was quickly forced to walk it back once it alarmed his European allies (yes, back then, as bad as America was, it still did have those) with its intellectual baggage. They KNEW exactly what images and tropes they were invoking. It is also partly why medieval crusade studies EXPLODED in popularity after 9/11. Everyone recognized that these two things had something to do with each other, or they made the connection somehow. So anyone watching KoH in 2005 wasn’t really watching a crusades film (it is set in the late 1180s and dramatizes the surrender of Jerusalem to Saladin) so much as a fictional film about the crusades made for an audience explicitly IN 2005. I have TONS to say on this subject (indeed, if you want a copy of my book chapter, DM me and I’ll be happy to send it.)

Ridley Scott basically sets it up as the Christian and Muslim secular leaders themselves aren’t evil, it’s all the religious fanatics (who are all made Templars, including Guy de Lusignan, going back to the “evil Templar” trope started by Sir Walter Scott and which we are all so very familiar with from Dan Brown and company). Orlando Bloom’s character shares a name (Balian de Ibelin) but very little else with the eponymous real-life crusader baron. One thing Scott did do very well was casting an actual and well-respected Syrian actor (Ghassan Massoud) to play Saladin and depicting him in essential fidelity to the historical figure’s reputed traits of justice, fairness, and mercy (there’s some article by a journalist who watched the film in Beirut with a Muslim audience and they LOVED the KoH Saladin). I do give him props for this, rather than making the Evil Muslim into the stock antagonist. However, Orlando Bloom’s Balian is redeemed from the religious extremist violence of the Templars (shorthand for all genuinely religious crusaders) by essentially being an atheistic/agnostic secular humanist who wants everyone to get along. As I said, this is a film about the invasion of Afghanistan and Iraq made three years after 9/11 more than anything else, and you can really see that.

That said, enough about KoH, back to this presumable Joe/Nicky backstory. You would obviously run into the fact that it’s SUPER difficult to make a film about the crusades without offending SOMEBODY. The urge to paint in broad strokes and make it all about the evil Westerners invading is one route, but it would weaken the moral complexity of the story and would probably make it come off as pandering to guilty white liberal consciences. Are we gonna touch on the many decades of proto-crusading ventures in Iberia, Sicily, North Africa, and other places, and how the eleventh century, especially under Pope Gregory VII, made it even thinkable for a Christian to be a holy warrior in the first place? (It was NOT normal beforehand.) How are we going to avoid the “lololol all religion sucks and makes people do crazy things” axe to grind favoured by So Very Smart (tm) internet atheists? Yes, we have to demonstrate the ultimate horror of the crusade and the flawed premises it was based on, but we can’t do that by just showing the dirty, religiously zealot medieval people doing that because they don’t know any better and are being cynically manipulated in God’s Name. In other words (and the original TOG film did this very well) we can’t position ourselves to laugh at or mock the crusader characters or feel confident in looking down on them for being Dumb Zealots. They have to be relatable enough that we realize we could BE (and in fact already ARE) them, and THEN you slide into the horror and what compels them to do those kinds of things, and THAT’S when it hits. Because take a look at the news. This is happening around us right now.

Obviously, as I was doing in my First Crusade chapter in DVLA, a lot of this also has to spend time centering the Muslim point of view, the way they reacted to the crusade, the ways in which Yusuf as an Isma’ili Shia Muslim (Kaysani is the name of a branch of Isma’ili Shi’ites, he has a definite historical context and family lineage, and hence is almost surely, as I wrote him, a Fatimid from Egypt) is likewise not just A Stock Muslim. In this case, obviously: Get actual Muslims on the set to advise about the details. Don’t make stupid and/or obvious mistakes. Don’t necessarily make the Muslims less faithful or less virtuous than the Christians (even if this is supposed to praise them as being “less fanatic” than those bad religious Catholics). Don’t tokenize or trivialize their reaction to something as horrific as the sack of Jerusalem, and don’t just use dead brown bodies as graphic visual porn for cheap emotional points. Likewise, it goes without saying, and I don’t think they would anyway, but OH MY GOD DON’T MAKE THIS INTO GAME OF THRONES GRIMDARK!!!! OH MY GOD!!! THERE IS BEAUTY AND THERE IS LIGHT AND THERE IS POETRY AND THAT’S WHY IT HURTS SO MUCH WHEN IT’S DESTROYED! AND THE CHOICES THAT PEOPLE MAKE TO DESTROY THOSE THINGS HAVE TO BE TERRIFYINGLY PLAUSIBLE AND FAMILIAR, BECAUSE OH MY GOD!!

Next, re: Nicolo. Evidently he is a priest or a former priest or something of the sort in the graphic novel, which becomes a bit of a problem if we want him to actually FIGHT in the crusades for important and/or shallow and/or OTP purposes. (I don’t know if they address this somehow or Greg Rucka is not a medieval historian or whatever, but never mind.) It was a Major Thing that priests could not carry weapons, at least and especially bladed weapons. (In the Bayeux Tapestry, we have Odo, the bishop of Bayeux, fighting at the battle of Hastings with a truncheon because he’s a clergyman and can’t have a sword). They were super not supposed to shed blood, and a broadsword (such as the type that Nicky has and carries and is clearly very familiar with) is a knight’s weapon, not a clergyman’s. The thing about priests was that they were not supposed to get their hands dirty with physical warfare; they could (and often did) accompany crusade armies, bishops were secular overlords and important landholders, monks and hermits and other religious preachers were obviously part of a religious expedition, and yes, occasionally some priests would break the rules and fight in battle. But this was an exception FAR more than the rule. So if we’re going by accuracy, we have Nicky as a priest who doesn’t actively fight and doesn’t have a sword, we have him as a rule-breaking priest with a sword (which would have to be addressed, and the Templars, who were basically armed monks, weren’t founded until 1119 so he can’t be one of those yet if this is still 1099) or we just skip the priest part and have him as a crusader with a sword like any other soldier. If he was in fact a priest, he also wouldn’t be up to the same standard of sending into battle. Boys, especially younger sons of the nobility, often entered the church at relatively early ages (12 or 13), where it was treated as a career, and hence they stopped training in arms. So if Nicky is actually out there fighting and/or getting killed by Yusuf several times for Important Purposes, he’s... almost surely not a priest.

Iirc, they’ve already changed a few things from the graphic novel (I haven’t read it, but this is what I’ve heard) so they can also tweak things to make a new backstory or a hybrid-new backstory in film-verse. So once we’ve done all the above, we still have to decide how to handle the actual sack of Jerusalem and massacre of its inhabitants, the balance between violence comparable to the original TOG film and stopping short of being exploitative (which I think they would do well), and the aftermath of that and the founding of the new Latin Christian kingdom. It would have to, as again the original film does very well, avoid prioritizing the usual players and viewpoints in these events, and dig into presenting the experiences of the marginalized and way in which ordinary people are brought to the point of doing these things. It doesn’t (and frankly shouldn’t) preach at us that U.S. Invasions Of The Middle East Are Bad (especially since obviously none of the characters/people/places/events here are American at all). And as I said already but bears repeating: my god, don’t even THINK about making it GOT and marketing it as Gritty Dramatic Medieval History, You Know It’s Real Because They’re Dirty, Violent, and Bigoted!

Also, a couple tags I saw pop up were things like “Period-Typical Racism” and “Period-Typical Homophobia” and mmm okay obviously yes there are these elements, but what exactly is “period typical?” Does it mean “using these terms just because you figure everyone was less tolerant back then?” We know that I, with my endless pages of meta on medieval queer history, would definitely side-eye any attempts to paint these things as Worse Than Us, and the setting alone would convey a sense of the conflict without having to add on gratuitous microaggressions. I basically think the film needs to be made exactly like the original: centering the gay/queer perspectives of marginalized people and people of color, resisting the urge for crass jokes at the expense of the identity of its characters, and approaching it with an awareness of the deep complexity and personal meaning of these things to people in terms of the historical moment we’re in, while not making a film that ONLY prizes our response and our current crises. Because if we’re thinking about these historical genealogies, the least we can do (although we so often aren’t) is to be honest.

Thanks! I LOVED this question.

#history #medieval history #kingdom of heaven #joe x nicky #long post #persephone-rose-r #ask #the old guard meta

[ms-march]

8 and 14 for the tea and books ask?

Thank you so much for the ask!!

8. “What are your top three films? Books?”

Ok ok so I’m very indecisive so just a warning at the very beginning of this. So if I had to pick too 3 films (not tv shows or anything like that) here they are in no specific order:

Marie Antoinette (2006) - this film is not meant to be super thrilling or anything but I of course love the aesthetic of it all AND the movie is also surprisingly historically accurate! It is rare that there’s a film that is both content accurate and costume accurate (and all the hats!!!). I really think it is often overlooked just how good the film actually is.

Beauty and the Beast (2017) - ok so I have a love hate relationship with this film and it shows. I honestly think that while Emma Watson might have been wonderfully similar to the animation of Belle and a generally well rounded actress, I simply think that she just wasn’t the best fit for the role (and do NOT get me started on the rumors she had refused to wear a period accurate costume because she thought it would be uncomfortable). But the film as a whole was honestly a masterpiece, each and every background person had accurate clothing (ish) and it showcased a variety of clothing options in the era, the music was a pure work of art and honestly thank god for Dan stevens and Alan menkin.

The Pirates of the Caribbean series (movies 1-3)- so as you can see I’m unfortunately a kid who was raised on Disney, and honestly my dad claims that he always knew I would take to historical costuming because all my favorite things as a child always had to do with 18th century clothing (both the accurate and the inaccurate). Yes this is also biased becuase men in uniform, Johnny depp in his prime (I know it’s controversial but you have to admit he was good at in this series), and most importantly Orlando bloom hot.

Ok so now that I’ve talked your ear off about why I’m seriously passionate about these movies, let me try to keep it short with no specific order of my top three books:

Little women - this is exactly why I created my blog becuase I adore this book for its aesthetic and I was haunted by amy march’s baby blue painted boots and then I came here. I have so many opinions and in depth analysis things about this boom and I will literally go on a whole different tirade about it if anyone would like to talk about it with me :))

Pride and Prejudice - if you don’t like this book something is wrong with you and you terrify me. It is truly the OG classic. (Also @tallmadgeandtea has a fire accent to do it as an audiobook). And on that note, I FIRMLY prefer paper to audio books at any time EXCEPT for when it comes to Jane Austen becuase there is simply so much you can miss if you opt for paper

Persuasion - shes so much better than sense and sensibility and I’ll stand by that till my dying days. Marianne has nothing on Miss Anne Elliot and it needed to be said. (Once again, audio book all the way. The Spotify classics one is actually v good)

14. “What is your opinion on poetry?”

Ok ok so this is gonna be kinda similar to my belief about Jane Austen and Audiobooks. I think that there is not a single “right” way to do poetry. I think that poetry is the most creative form of art and can be used to express the most diverse and core-striking human emotions that we often times do not even know we experience until we see it in those words and go “there! Right there! That’s what it is!” I think that poetry can encapsulate all of humanity’s depth and complexity, and from there I think that poetry is easily the most difficult of the human talents to acquire. Even the classic writers were not, in their infinite wisdom, the most accomplished and inspiring poets. I think that bronte poetry is boring and Shakespeare all too often misses the mark, but I have cried to sonnets of a love that will last through the ages, immortalized in time through the piece and I have been lost in the very complexity of thought in same pages of the bard who I frequently criticize. Poetry does not have to be done by an elite person. I think that anyone could do this and that any form of poetry can inspire the deepest of emotions, thoughts, and connections should the author be so talented as to have the ability to encapsulate their human experience into its famed lines.

#I have a lot of options #like A LOT #and I clearly don’t pick my battles either #I will die on every hill I stand on and not regret it even once #clair rambles #i love oversharing #this was SO FUN

[thirstaidkitpodcast]

THIRST AID KIT | S6E03 | HOT MEN IN BAD MOVIES

Gather round, kids, and let’s talk about some of the necessary evils that exist in this world. Sometimes, especially, in times such as these, you find yourself watching a bad movie*.

Exhibit A:

This movie is astonishing in its badness. The writing is not great. The plot is high key equal parts distressing and laughable, and low key fully bonkers. It’s quite alarming in places! The direction, such that it is, feels lazy. The performances vary so wildly it feels like different people are playing the same parts. The sex faces are mesmerisingly odd. The prosthetic peen is... the wrong color. The whole movie is a gaping plot hole. 365 Dni/365 Days is without question, one of the worst things currently streaming on Netflix.

It also stars Michele Morrone.

This is Michele Morrone. 👇🏾

Anyway. We can’t wait for the sequel. 👀 

This episode is all about the low stakes calamity of having a very hot man in a very bad film. Moreso when this is one of the rare occasions where the man in very hot! Case in point, Brad Pitt in Troy. This gif isn’t even doing him any justice. 

Brad Pitt in Troy is a top five entry in ‘cinematic thigh meat” (he’ll NEVER catch up to Winston Duke, bless). His bottom lip has never been poutier, his skin never more bronzed, his war skirt never littler. And yet. Troy is inexplicably bad, and it pains us, because it contains other excellent thirst-worthy candidates, like Eric Bana as Hector (a tortured man, who knew war, and never wanted to know it again!); Orlando Bloom as Paris (a fool! a beautiful fool!); and a tender performance by an elderly Peter O’Toole... Its parts are so much greater than its sum. But we’ll watch it every time it’s on TV to see dem thighs. 

Lookit:

We also discussed Djimon Hounsou, who has been hot for... most of our lives now? It’s kind of ridiculous how beautiful he is, and has been. But... the roles? They leave much to be desired. In particular, we were thinking of the Tarzan reboot from a few years back. Remember? You may have blocked it out. Let’s refresh your memory:

Yeah.

Look at him when he’s not co-starring in a story that we have described as irredeemably “racist, colonialist claptrap that no retelling can save”:

Plush. Luxe. Resplendent.

Thanks, anyway, man. You too, Alexander Skarsgård.

Fanfic Wars is back this week, and we went down very different paths with our drabbles. 😂 Feel free to tell your your fave on here on on our Twitter. You can listen to the whole episode RIGHT HERE (more ways to listen are listed below).

——————————————————————————————-

Subscribe to get new episodes delivered to your device automatically every Thursday. We’re on Apple and Stitcher and Podbean and Google Play and Overcast and iHeartRadio and Spotify and and and… Search ‘Thirst Aid Kit’ wherever you get your podcasts, and we’ll come up.

We’re on Twitter at @thirstaidkit. Send us your drabbles (keep ‘em short!) to [email protected]. Also we still enjoy getting a (five star? 👀) rating and reviews on Apple Podcasts, so if the spirit moves you… we’d love that. Stay safe, protect others: wear a mask, please. 😷💜

#Thirst Aid Kit #Thirst Aid Kit podcast #TAKPod #Bim Adewunmi #NIchole Perkins #Slate Podcasts #Michele Morrone #365 Days #365 Dni #Brad Pitt #Djimon Hounsou #Alexander Skarsgård

[i-am-just-a-kiddo]

favourite male fictional characters

Thank you @vishcount​ for tagging me, this was a lot of fun! 💞 I originally planned to follow your example and put ten characters here but suddenly it became a lot more oops. also i hope you forgive me for following your format, it’s neat 

I am tagging @isabellaofparma​ , @the-cloud-whisperer​ and @sassyassassy​!

I chose the characters that impacted me deeply on a personal level throughout my life (often shown by how long my love lasts over the years and if i was inspired to write for them). 

In no specific order under the cut: 

Legolas

The Lord of The Rings, J.R.R. Tolkien. 

I think it’s only fitting I start off with this magnificent guy. Maybe I gotta admit, i’ve just had a crush on him ever since I was like, nine years old? He’s the character I will fight tooth and claw for (though I guess he doesn’t need me to do that). I love Orlando Bloom’s portrayal of him, eventhough he is vastly different from the books. Book Legolas is such a delight as well, he feels so whimsical and playful and his banter with Gimli is just gold. I was sad when The Hobbit trilogy came out and I was so disappointed by how they butchered his character, it just did not feel authentic anymore (maybe I am also just bitter about the forced hetero storyline for him. makes no cents, this elf is GayTM your honour. and he will meet his soulmate Gimli in a few decades).  Either way, Legolas is the love of my life, thanks for coming to my tedtalk,

Peter Pan 

Peter Pan, J. M. Barrie

Another childhood crush of mine. The gif I chose if from the 2005 movie because we always used to watch it and it is to this day one of my favourite movies. It’s so dreamy, so magical, yet also incredibly sad and sweet.  I have this very strange fascination with Peter Pan. There is something incredibly unsettling about him, especially in the book. He represents something every child wants - who doesn’t want to escape their bedroom and fly away to experience magical adventured far from the adult world? And yet he also represents the impossibility of it, the curse he carries around with himself because he will forever stay alone, no matter how many lost boys he gathers around himself. And Wendy - it’s a love that was never meant to grow and mature, it’s a fleeting dream for the both of them.  I have seen many different adaptations of Peter Pan and I have my favourites, though I want to give a special mention to the book Peter Darling by Austin Chant. It’s a retelling of the story how we know it, in which Peter returns to Neverland after having finally grown up BUT the main points I want to highlight is trans Peter? Heck yes. Gripping and compelling gay love story with our favourite original lost boy Captain Hook? YES. 

Snufkin

Moomins, Tove Jansson.

I have discovered Snufkin for myself only last year, and yet I know he will stay with me forever. In short - I vibe with him, he vibes with me. His anxieties about being with people and longing for solitude? His fear of being loved and being important to someone to a point he doesn’t know what to do with himself? This man just wants to roam freely with his own mind and yet he always returns for something that captures him. Mum, I love him because I have rarely felt this seen before. Also, Snufkin said ACAB. 

Prince Jing - Xiao Jingyan

Nirvana in Fire (2015)

This too is a darling I have only discovered recently. I watched Nirvana in Fire this year and let me tell you, it’s the best show I have seen in a long while. It’s absolutely amazing and it also ripped my heart out. All the characters are absolutely amazing and I am still not over it.

To be honest, I contemplated between Xiao JIngyan and Mei Changsu, because character-wise I think the latter is a lot more interesting and compelling. He makes for a fantastic heartbreaking and flawed protagonist.

However I have to admit - it was love at first sight with Prince Jing for me and I’m still lowkey mad abt it rip. Seems like I am not immune to Pretty Prince Propaganda. But apart from that, I adore him for his genuine

goodness,

his almost naive drive to be better and seek justice. He lost everything, and for the longest time did not have anything to fight for. So alone and lost and bitter, it makes me sad how much it hardened him. He is heartbreak and clumsy kindness hidden under a skin of scars that was inflicted by his father and many others. I see his sad cat-eyes and I cry, that’s just how it is.

Edmund Pevensie

The Chronicles of Narnia, C. S. Lewis

I grew up with these books and movies - they have always been part of my life and it will probably always stay that way (only last night I rewatched the first movie and sobbed).  Imagine my surprised when I finally watched the last movie about five years ago and was incredibly impressed by how they adapted the book; also imagine my brain suddenly going CASMUND in bold letters at Skandar Keynes’ and Ben Barnes’  performance in that movie.  From there, I rediscovered this story completely anew for myself. My favourite Pevensie sibling has always been Lucy (and still is, because I identify with her so much and she feels like home to me); however this new discovery of Edmund’s character was overwhelming. It’s interesting to see characters you’ve grown up with from a more grown up point of view. I don’t want to lay out all my thoughts here, just know I am so heartbroken for him, and so so proud as well. His character arc is amazing and maybe that’s how the last movie makes me even more emotional. Seeing Edmund and Lucy still holding on to Narnia but knowing that that door was closing for them? Not to mention what happens in the later books (we don’t talk about that).  Also did I mention Casmund. Here, have my incredibly emo and depressing take on Edmund’s character that I started writing four years ago and which will forever stay a WIP. 

Nie Huaisang

The Untamed (2019)

My son. My soul. My bane of existence. The tragic thing about him is, that he does not really exist in canon as I have created him for myself. He’s a secondary character in the show, always so relatable yet still brings the ultimate twist of the story, yet he still remains this incomplete shadow. The movie

Fatal Journey

gave him a lot more and I cried tears of joy and devastation. I don’t know why I latched on to him so much, but apparently he is the one that I project on, the one that feels like he sits somewhere inside my chest. I don’t know what else to say - this year he has been everything to me. I spend a lot of time in his head while writing, and maybe that’s how he’s there forever now. Nie Huaisang saw my brain and went it’s free real estate. All my love for you, you dramatic art hoe.

Sherlock Holmes

Sherlock Holmes, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

Ah, another lifelong companion. There are many adapations that I adore - starting from the origin of it all, the books and stories which I have all devoured; the 80s adaptation with Jeremy Brett which was incredibly wonderful; to BBC Sherlock which shaped and traumatised me (I still like the first three seaons but I am too hurt to think about it); to the numerous movies -  but by far my most favourite performance is Basil Rathbone as Sherlock Holmes. Somehow he manages to capture the Holmes I see in my head when I read the books, the sharp yet polite eccentric detective, who loves his companion so much and who has desire to help others.  Sherlock Holmes will always stay special to me, in so many different ways. He shaped my youth and I know he will stay with me. (also what would you say when I told you he helped me discover that I can, in fact, be queer AND ace at the same time? thanks pal).  What else is there to say? Sherlock Holmes is a universe that you can dive into and find many amazing treasures. 

Isak Valtersen 

SKAM (2015)

There he is, the boy that changed my life. SKAM changed my life. All of the characters did. However, Isak is special for many, as I imagine. I remember winter 2016, when tumblr was flooded by these norwegian white boys kissing in a pool and cuddling and I was like ‘nah’, this doesn’t look convincing.  I don’t know what changed my mind but I remember sitting down at last and watching all that was released of season three and it was only downhill from there. I remember starting to follow the real life updates religiously while watching the other previous seasons in between. The one clip that completely wrecked me was when Isak went to the school nurse about his struggles with sleep - it felt like for the first time I saw someone on screen that could understand me on so many different levels. The entierty of seaons three is so personal, I would tell you to go watch it if you don’t know what I mean. The entire show in fact. It’s a masterpiece and it feels so real. This show impacted my life in a way that no show has managed to do before. I miss it so much. I miss Isak too sigh. 

Shang Xirui

Winter Begonia (2020)

Technically, for me personally, Shang Xirui is the nonbinary, gay and ace representation I need in my life (or at least that’s my own personal take on him), but since that is not official, he’s still here on this list. Of course he is because wow, it’s been a long while since I’ve seen such a compelling character on screen. I went from disliking him to being absolutely heartbroken over him. I don’t think any other character in this show captured me as much as he did. There are so many layers to him and discovering all of his sides is a wonderful, heartbreaking, painful and also beautiful journey. I’m not sure I understand all of him yet, but I am willing to try and dig and just ponder his existence. This too, is a perfect example for a flawed yet authentic protagonist. Also he is the most beautiful thing on this planet, or at least that’s how I have been feeling ever since I watched this. I wish to write more of him in the future. 

Aang

Avatar: The Last Airbender (2005)

I grew up watching ATLA and my favourite characters have always been Toph, Zuko and Uncle Iroh. In recent years however, I completely fell in love with Aang all anew. 

I think especially in the past, I had these prejudices against main characters and found them all the most boring personalities ever. In recent years this changed a lot and especially Aang is a prime example for that. Watching him from the perspective of older me, I find so much wisdom in this young boy. Somehow he represents all I wish to be in my life but at the same time he shows his flaws, he carries this sadness with him that will accompany him all his life. This inner battle and chaos that he has to face day to day and in the end - he is just a young boy. So much has been taken from him and yet he learns how to not let it overtake him, that anger and hurt. He tries his hardest to be better than the day before, even if sometimes the world crashes down on him and he gets overwhelmed. He is a child recruited by adults to manage their mistakes and play into the hands of predestined fate and in this essay I will -

Harry Potter 

Harry Potter, J.K. Rowling

I am surprised myself. I thought I would put Fred and George here, or Remus and Sirius, however I realised that none of them quite capture this feeling of lifelong change, of personal, deep impact that Harry had on me. 

As with Aang above, I used to think Harry was the most boring protagonist, yet my opinion took a 180° turn in the past years. Many of the things I wrote for Aang apply to him too - the fact that he was a child, that lost so much, and was always faced with challenges that a child should never have needed to face. Something I want to address is how my favourite book, The Order of the Phoenix, lays all of this out. Harry is just as flawed, just as vulnerable and angry as anyone else. I know some people did not like his ‘emo behaviour’ in the fifth book but for me it just showed how human he is, how he was just a teen like myself at that time. As for many, this boy shaped my entire life, shaped a generation, and I will forever be grateful. I’m sad and angry at how J*R behaves, and how she puts us in the position of doubting our love for these stories. I know I will always love them, but I will not turn a blind eye on all the problematic shit is carries with itself and what the author piles upon us. 

Lan Wangji & Wei Wuxian 

The Untamed (2019)

I will try and keep this short, because if you want to read my thoughts about Wangxian just go to my ao3 and find the  over 70k i wrote for them.  I decided to put them here together because I can’t seperate them and I can’t choose between them. Each of them carries something I recognise in myself, and each of them is the opposite of me. They each own my heart and soul and I know there will never be a fictional couple like this for me ever again. They’ve snuck their way into my heart and have never left. They deserve to be here, together, because my love for them is indescribable. Bless them.  + Bonus:

The Doctor

Doctor Who (1963/2005)

Technically, the Doctor doesn’t count as a “male” character, but since he has been presenting as male up until recently, I needed to include him. I chose the Tenth Doctor because he is the one that broke my heart the most. I adored Nine but he was there too short, and I do love Eleven and Twelve a lot, and Thirteen absolutely owns my heart, Ten has just always been the one that made me cry the most. I loved this era of Doctor Who, I loved how sad and hopeful he was, how heartbroken and yet determined to help wherever it was needed. Doctor Who is always that show, when I return to it, I am reminded that maybe, humanity and the universe isn’t all that bad. 

phew, this took ages damn. but i had so much fun! i decided to leave out honorable mentiones because we would be sitting here until tomorrow lol. 

#gosh this was nice #a lot of incoherent rambling here #thanks dear #tag game #personal

[tabloidtoc]

In Touch, April 12

You can buy a copy of this issue for your very own at my eBay store: https://www.ebay.com/str/bradentonbooks

Cover: Reese Witherspoon divorce shocker

Page 1: Contents

Page 2: Who Wore It Better? Heidi Klum vs. Maren Morris in Dundas, Scarlett Johansson vs. Ingrid Andress in Tom Ford, Kate Upton vs. Zoey Deutch in Old Navy

Page 4: Kylie Jenner bought all of this instead of helping a friend -- Kylie gave $5000 to a GoFundMe to help pay a portion of the medical bills for Samuel Rauda, a makeup artist friend-of-a-friend who'd been in a serious accident, but when Kylie urged her fans to donate as well, she was slammed for not covering all his expenses. Here are the investments that were worth her hard-earned bucks

Page 5: Man Candy of the Week -- Jason Derulo leaving an L.A. gym after a two-hour sweat session, Number of the Week -- 1 million viewers Ellen DeGeneres has lost from her talk show following allegations of a toxic workplace, Clapback of the Week -- Priyanka Chopra to a critic who suggested she wasn't qualified to announce the Oscar nominations, TMI of the Week -- Orlando Bloom who replied Not Enough when asked how often he and Katy Perry have sex adding we just had a baby though, Makeover of the Week -- Leah McSweeney goes from blonde to red

Page 6: Crib of the Week -- Rihanna's Beverly Hills stunner, Winner of the Week -- Prince Harry who on top of his Netflix and Spotify deals scored a new job as an executive at a San Francisco-based tech startup, Loser of the Week -- Dr. Oz as former Jeopardy! contestants and fans call for his removal accusing the celebrity doc of dispensing dubious health advice over the years

Page 8: Up Close -- Julianne Hough introducing her new Fresh Vine wine line with Nina Dobrev

Page 9: Nick Jonas holding a Blake Shelton bobblehead on The Voice, Heidi Klum's husband Tom Kaulitz gets cheeky at a backyard barbecue

Page 10: Britney Spears' boyfriend Sam Asghari shows off his pecs while heading to the gym in L.A., a new photo of Kristen Stewart as the late Princess Diana in the upcoming movie Spencer

Page 12: Bethenny Frankel wipes out in the waves in Miami, Neil Patrick Harris snorkeling, Paul McCartney soaks up the rays in St. Barts

Page 13: Rose McGowan at the beach in Tulum, Mexico

Page 14: Demi Moore with two puppies on #NationalPuppyDay, Selena Gomez shares a throwback photo of her and Taylor Swift and her cat Benjamin Button

Page 16: Duchess Kate Middleton and Prince William return to their wedding venue Westminster Abbey for an official engagement a few weeks before their 10th anniversary

Page 18: Madonna serving her signature look at age 62, Justin Bieber gets a neck tattoo referencing his latest single Peaches

Page 20: Sharon Stone has had a lot of health problems, she writes about in her new memoir

Page 21: Gwyneth Paltrow is desperate to get Meghan Markle to collaborate with her on future content for Gwyneth's wellness and lifestyle company Goop -- she know Meghan once had a similar site called The Tig, pre-Harry, and she'd bring so much exposure to Goop -- of course Gwyneth also thinks it'd be cool to say she's friends with Meghan as Gwyneth is very focused on status and loves the royal family and they're neighbors in Montecito, so she's been going out of her way to ingratiate herself into Meghan and Harry's life -- Gwyneth even sent Meghan a box of products from Goop's website

* Alex Rodriguez and Barbara Corcoran: Worst Landlords Ever? -- critics sure think so after a building in which the stars are part-owners threw out a COVID-19 victim's belongings while he was in the hospital -- Ryo Nagaoka was admitted to Bellevue in January and returned to his East Village home in late March to find it virtually empty and the locks changed but the building's managers who control the daily operations were just protecting the other residents as Nagaoka's condition had deteriorated some much, they felt his apartment was a health hazard -- Alex hasn't commented on the incident, but Barbara says the management company, with Mr. Nagaoka's permission, has fully renovated his apartment and everyone is the building is beyond thrilled to discover he had returned

* Star Sightings -- Nina Agdal, Brooklyn Decker, Chrishell Stause

Page 22: Cover Story -- Reese Witherspoon and Jim Toth hanging by a thread -- tears, threats and a costly mistake: why Reese and Jim are at the breaking point -- in many ways, they're leading separate lives

Page 26: Bindi Irwin's baby joy -- introducing Grace Warrior Irwin Powell

Page 28: After eight year of hell, Bethenny Frankel is finally divorced from Jason Hoppy, and she's ready to wed again to Paul Bernon

Page 30: Prince Charles and Duchess Camilla's anniversary from hell -- Charles' marriage with Camilla is cracking under pressure -- the last few weeks have been an absolute nightmare for the couple

Page 34: The Big Interview -- Sherri Shepherd

Page 36: Beauty -- Spring's fragrance fix -- Kaia Gerber

Page 40: Animal Overload

Page 46: Horoscope -- Aries Mandy Moore turned 37 on April 10

Page 48: Last Laughs

#tabloid #grain of salt #tabloid toc #tabloidtoc #reese witherspoon #jim toth #bindi irwin #grace warrior irwin powell #bethenny frankel #prince charles #duchess camilla #camilla parker bowles #sherri shepherd #who wore it better? #kylie jenner #rihanna #sharon stone #gwyneth paltrow #goop #meghan markle #alex rodriguez #barbara corcoran #julianne hough #nina dobrev #nick jonas #heidi klum #tom kaulitz #sam asghari #kristen stewart #kristen stewart as princess diana

[amandaklwrites]

Movie Review: Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl (2003)

Genre: Action/Adventure/Fantasy

Rating: 10/10

Movie Review: 

Where do I even begin. THIS MOVIE, THIS FRANCHISE, IS ONE OF THE BEST TO ME. I LOVE THIS MOVIE WITH ALL MY HEART. (Can you hear me screaming from so far away?) 

This movie formulated so much of my life. I know that may sound silly, but in my life, it’s true. I didn’t see the film when it first came out (I was like 7-8, it would’ve been too much for me), but later, when I was about 12, after a split decision to watch it one late evening. 

And I remember being so sucked in that I think I wasn’t even aware of my own breathing or thoughts. 

I was in love with Elizabeth immediately (I should’ve known I was into women back then, but I figured it out a while later), and Will Turner was a breath of fresh air and made my heart melt. I can say that Gilbert Blythe and Will Turner are the men I want in my life, so they’ve created a bar for when I meet men. If they aren’t anywhere close to them, then meh. Jack Sparrow made me laugh, and made me think.... okay, maybe pirates aren’t so bad. 

Then, here comes Barbossa. Good lord, isn’t he a good villain? Menacing, freaky, destructive, but somehow, sarcastic? Though he’s a villain, I noticed how desperate he was. How much he just wanted to live and eat and breathe again. It showed an interesting take on piracy-- men like Barbossa want to live forever, don’t they? To be immortal? Well, Barbossa got it. But he doesn’t want it. He realizes the twistedness of it, and he wants to live again. That’s why I feel myself crying when he finally gets shot and he whispers, “I feel... cold.” Cause though he doesn’t want to die, his words were “I feel.” Those are important to him. With that death, he feels for the last time. To me, it felt like I hear relief in his voice. It has finally ended, this curse that has terrorized him. 

I just rewatched this movie last night, and I found something interesting. 

Guys, listen to Jack Sparrow and Barbossa talk. THEY ARE INTELLIGENT MEN. They bring up philosophy, they use words that even I don’t know. These aren’t “idiot” pirates, men who were poor and escaped into freedom on the seas. Though, especially in Jack’s case, they act and talk like pirates, sometimes, they slip into a language that makes me consider their backstories. Who were these men? Why are they so smart, but out here as brutal killers and pillagers? What made them like this? 

(Raises brows). There’s more to their stories, and my only complaint about this movie is that we aren’t told any of it. 

Oh well. We’re on a wild affair of adventure and pirating and stolen women and curses. Everything about this story is absolute magic and perfection. The conversations aren’t lacking, there is so much great humor (appropriately placed, as well), there’s a darkness that shows that pirates aren’t as glorified as we want to make them, and these are real, breathing characters. 

We watch Elizabeth Swann brave this horrible world, learning how to trick even the tricksters, using her wit and bravery and intelligence to outwit them all and stay alive. Elizabeth Swann is probably my main fictional hero, because yes, she is a beautiful woman, but her beauty is never used in that sense. The pirates don’t take her or use her because of her beauty. It’s more complicated than that. I think Barbossa recognizes her wits and intelligence, and hopefully, admire her for it. She’s uses everything but her beauty to her advantage. And she comes out the one with the most growth. Keira Knightly show us a strong, powerful woman without powers or control in her world, but my god, she takes the world by storm, pulling on the corset straps to become one of the best warriors-- she does become the queen after all! (Also, did you know Keira Knightly was only 17 in this movie??? Like, come on!) 

We see Will Turner turn from a quiet, complacent man to someone yelling at men higher than him in station because he wants to save the woman he loves. We see him deal with the fact that he comes from pirates, learns that not everyone is who they say they are, and that may be okay. That not everyone is perfect, and sometimes, you can’t follow everyone else. Will Turner joins the pirates to do the right thing. He recognizes that the system of his own world isn’t right, and that’s why he saves Jack Sparrow in the end. Because he knows what is right and wrong now. Orlando Bloom brought a gentleness to a man living in a world where brutality was the answer-- but for him, everything was chosen because of love. 

And then there’s Jack Sparrow. The wonderful character we all love. Johnny Depp swept onto the screen as this character by stepping into port right off a sinking boat. As soon as he did so, I knew I was going to love this character (I actually managed to practice so much that I could talk exactly like Jack, accent and all, for quite a long time, if I wanted). He gave us a character we love because he's honest about who he is, and I think that’s why the other characters love him too. Though he can be a little shit and switch sides for whoever will help him the most, everyone knows that’s just how he is. He doesn't hide his flaws and faults, and that’s what makes him so intriguing in the franchise. He’s just Jack Sparrow. He’s out for himself (though he does do some things for love, in the end). We got a morally gray pirate who just wants to survive and have all the treasure, and isn’t into murder and gore like Barbossa. He just wants to have some damn fun. 

All the other characters brought so much to the table as well. Norrington represented the colonial world who immediately saw PIRATE and thought HORRIBLE. But I think he learned so much by the end, especially by giving Jack “a day’s head start.” I think Norrington questioned his own world by witnessing what Will had done to save Elizabeth, and it made him question himself. That was why, at first, he was so desperate to prove himself. Because he was questioning himself the whole time. (And can we just talk about how he is actually a good man?? At the end, he realized Elizabeth loved Will and he WALKED AWAY! He didn’t fight, he didn’t argue, he didn’t use his station over Will. He just hoped Will loved her well enough. Like, how cool is that??? Good men in this movie!)

The sets and filming locations were so beautiful and added another level the movie. I can feel the Caribbean through the screen, and I love how I can feel the ocean through this. I love watching the ocean, and I feel the same sensation in this movie. It brings it all more to life. This movie does a great job of sucking you into a movie of pirates and the sea. And the tone is so dark, but it gives it so much meaning, and you feel like you are Elizabeth, surviving in this world that we don’t quite know or understand, but we’re learning. 

I grew up with the ocean. I spent half of my life along the water, day, night, for hours on end. I know what it’s like to jump into the ocean and swim and float there, I know what it’s like to be on a small boat in the ocean heading toward Canada, and walking around the boat with my grandpa and not getting seasick. The sea is in my blood in ways I can’t ever quite understand, and this movie speaks to me on that level and more. 

Overall, this movie is a fun adventure, with sword fights and stranded islands, and curses. On the surface, it’s a love story, a rescuing of a woman who can handle herself just as well as being saved. But, deep down below the depths of those waters, it’s more than that. It’s about a pair of young people, especially a young woman, learning the truth of the world, seeing the other side of life, and realizing that maybe their old life isn’t exactly what they first believed. They discover who they are, while discovering the truth of everything they had believed in, and changing for the better. They join the chaotic life of the pirates to find who they are, deep down inside, together. 

Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate’s life for me. 

#pirates of the caribbean #curse of the black pearl #pirates of the Caribbean franchise #movie reviews

[scottspack]

Over a week ago @progmetallesbian created the “Top Ten Niche Interests” tag game and tagged me in it and ive been meaning to do it ever since!!! My lovely wife @got2ghost tagged me in it again today so it’s finally happening:

TOP TEN NICHE INTERESTS

As a preface, ive seen a lot of these from other people and you all have wonderful, very niche interests (ex: amy & chi) and it made me feel like a lame normie when i started thinking about my interests bc apparently im not into anything THAT niche, so these are the things that to me are personally niche and to everyone else are probably just normal things

1. TOTTENHAM HOTSPUR FC: there’s a long unimportant story to how my dad and i became spurs fans but the fact of the matter is that we’ve been following spurs soccer for three years now and it’s an interest i literally ONLY get to talk about with my dad because i have about two (2) friends who are interested in soccer and zero (0) of them watch the EPL. it’s hilarious to me that what is probably my personally most niche interest is the one that is shared by the vast majority of the world. such is the life of being a soccer fan in america :(

2. THE PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN TRILOGY: this is an old niche and another one that isnt that niche at all but one i feel compelled to include because when i tell you that i was obsessed with this trilogy in elementary school, obsessed is not nearly a strong enough word. i watched all three movies so often that i broke about 2 sets of dvds per movie. i know every possible piece of trivia about these movies. i had every piece of merch from claire’s and hot topic that it was possible to own. my friend and i read about 500 different books on pirates. we called orlando bloom “orly”. i could go on. potc was probably the only thing ive ever been legitimately “hyper-fixated” on and i will defend all three of those movies until i die!!!! if you’ve ever said “i liked the second two but i just couldnt follow the plot” please let me know and i will be happy to explain it to you in excruciating detail!

3. SOLO THRU-HIKE BLOG POSTS: this one i feel can actually count as niche! i fucking love reading blog posts from professional hikers who do crazy long solo thru-hikes. the lewis and clark trail, the appalachian trail, and the te araroa trail in new zealand are some of my favorite to read posts about, but ill read about any solo thru-hikes because i think its fucking bonkers and interesting and complex and inspiring and i hope to never ever do one in my entire life!

4. R/PARANORMAL: i have no reddit experience, i dont have an account, and i never want to actively engage in the reddit community. BUT. i fucking love ghosts and the paranormal so r/paranormal is a treasure trove for fun ghost stories and i read it pretty regularly! a lot of them are silly as youd expect but every now and then there are some really good ones that scare the shit out of me

5. HISTORICAL DRESS YOUTUBERS: it started with bernadette banner and once i had watched pretty much every single video she ever made, i started watching her friend’s channels, and then their friend’s channels. i have no interest in ever dressing historically, i dont really care about fashion, and i will never make my own clothes, but goddamn it if it isnt extremely fun and interesting to watch how passionate these ladies are about their specific niche time period of historical clothing! the talent! the history! its amazing! 

6. INSTAGRAM PINUP MODELS: i honestly cant remember how i stumbled into this world but there is an entire community of classic “pinup” models on instagram who have the most beautiful and creative looks ive ever seen and i now follow like 15 of them and am obsessed with watching them do their hair and makeup 

7. THE COUNT OF MONTE CRISTO (2002): this is the greatest film adaption of a book, the greatest period piece, and the greatest piece of cinema ever created by human kind. im not interested in debating, i just know that im right.

8. ENDLESS OCEAN: endless ocean was a game i owned on the wii as a preteen that i played for like a year and has been living in my head rent free ever since. you play as a scuba diver in the great barrier reef and all you do is go diving and catalog fish for your conservation team. thats it. that’s the entire game. and playing it was the happiest ive ever been in my life!

9. BANDS FC: there’s a guy on twitter who combines bands and soccer clubs to create new logos. ive been following him forever and its one of my favorite things on the internet!!! he puts a ton of time and research into his designs and they’re all so good. fun fact, he’s also a gay ally and once went to battle against british footie homophobes! a true king!

10. CHRISTIAN MYTHOLOGY: idk if it counts as niche if i blog about it on the regular but i have a deep deep love for the aesthetics, stories, and legacies of christianity. i grew up non-denominational christian but have always been (prepare for cringe) a spiritual person, so i have a huge appreciation for all religions! but obviously christianity is fairly ubiquitous in america and the only religion i have any claim to, so it’s a big interest of mine to explore christian mythology and the ways it’s shaped human history

im going to tag @wolfbuddy @eremji @curlytemple and @significationary if yall are interested!

#i wish i had more interesting niche interests but apparently im either a huge normie or have the worlds worst memory #and cant remember any of my more unique interests #its probably the first one ://// #amy this was just a creative and fun idea #thanks for making it!

[mortuarybees]

What books do you recommend me to read?

I’m not sure what your tastes are but I’ll tell you some of my favorites! To be quite honest, I mainly return to the same books over and over again so the list is rather short and I doubt I have anything to recommend that you won’t have heard of already. I’ll recommend my favorites. It consists mainly of my usual rotation of things i read over and over or books that left an impression on me and I refer back to them often.

When it comes to the non-fiction section just like….keep in mind that most academic texts have many, many problems and I’m not presenting any of the texts I list as The Quintessential Must Read Best Flawless Overview of a topic, I’m mainly listing the books I have found to be approachable and reasonable introductions to topics. Read everything critically, always (and that includes everything else on this list, not just the non-fiction).

Plays:

An Oresteia, translated by Anne Carson (Aeschylus’ Agamemnon, Sophocles’ Elektra, Euripides’ Orestes)

Iphigenia in Tauris by Euripides

I mean like. Shakespeare, obviously; my personal favorites are Hamlet, Twelfth Night, As You Like It, Julius Caesar, and Macbeth; recently, thanks to the productions starring David Tennant, Much Ado About Nothing and Richard II have been added to the list

Doctor Faustus, Edward II, and Dido by Christopher Marlowe

Antigone, particularly Anne Carson’s translation, and after you’ve read Antigone, I’d recommend reading Antigonick, but not before

Lysistrata by Aristophanes

The Importance of Being Earnest by Oscar Wilde (I feel like Lady Windermere’s Fan is also kind of necessary reading and I do love it of course but I’ve only read it the once, for the sake of it, whereas I’ve come back to the Importance of Being Earnest a million times and the 2002 movie is one of the things I watch when I’m down)

Novels (and Epics)

Good Omens by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett if you haven’t yet, obviously

Maurice by E. M. Forster

The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde

The Secret History by Donna Tartt

VIRGINIA WOOLF. everything but particularly the Waves, Orlando, and Mrs. Dalloway. The Waves is my favorite, followed closely by Orlando, but I’d start with the Mrs. Dalloway because it gets you accustomed to Woolf’s writing style and the way she approaches her characters if you haven’t read her before.

Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen (If you haven’t read it yet and you have seen 2005 P&P and love it and you’re opening the novel with the expectation that it’s similar to the 2005 film in tone and feel, you’ll be disappointed. If you’ve seen the 1995 miniseries, that reflects it very well. So just approach it with an open mind with 2005 on the back burner and you’ll find it an amazing and very repressed love story)

Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe by Benjamin Alire Sáenz

Brideshead Revisited by Evelyn Waugh

When the Moon Was Ours by Anna-Marie McLemore

The Iliad (the translation I own is Lombardo. It’s extremely approachable and colloquial and I enjoy it, and if you’ve never read the Iliad and you find it intimidating, I would very much recommend it, but my high opinion is not universal. Fagles and Lattimore are very popular translations and I like them both well enough)

I’m dying to get a copy of Emily Wilson’s Odyssey translation. I don’t love the Odyssey personally but I am a big fan of Wilson and from what I’ve read about her translation and what she’s said about it, if anything could make me enjoy the Odyssey, it would be that translation.

Wuthering Heights by Emily Brontë

The Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller. I would personally recommend reading the Iliad first just because Miller takes…….liberties with it, but I also don’t think there’s a problem with that at all, so if you’re not interested in the Iliad, or you think tsoa would get you interested in it, there’s nothing at all wrong with reading it on its own or reading it first. I just think it’s a genuinely more enjoyable experience to read the Iliad first and then see what Miller does with it. And regardless of what order you read them in, if you read them both you will understand how very different tsoa and the Iliad are from one another and you will not be one of those people who talks about the Iliad when what they mean is tsoa. Again, there’s nothing wrong with tsoa, it’s one of my favorite novels, but it’s just a very separate thing and it gets just a little maddening.

Autobiography of Red by Anne Carson. It’s both poetry and a novel but it’s got to go somewhere so

When I was 14 I got very into Les Mis and i will recommend it. I genuinely love it and it will always have a special place in my heart. I have read the entire brick only once however because as much as i love it. as much as i Relate to the infamous off-topic tangents. there is a limit to my patience.

The Epic of Gilgamesh is just like. extremely good. I really don’t know enough about it to recommend any specific translations; in high school I was given a stapled copy of the whole thing and I read that til I lost it and now if I want to reread it or refer back I just look it up online. I’m a fake fan.

Poetry

If Not, Winter: Fragments of Sappho translated by Anne Carson

The Beauty of the Husband by Anne Carson

Devotions, Felicity, and Winter Hours by Mary Oliver. Those are the anthologies that I have read and I adore them. I imagine that all of her anthologies are also amazing and all of them are on my to-read list. I don’t think you could possibly go wrong

I do not have the singular published collection of Elizabeth Siddal’s poetry (My Ladys Soul) but I have read all of her poetry and she is an amazing poet and I hold her very near and dear to my heart

Crush by Richard Siken

Useless Magic by Florence Welch……..yall knew what you came here for

Songs of Innocence and Experience by William Blake

Non-fiction and Essay Collections (again. None of these are recommended as the definitive, end all, be all, all-you-need book on any given subject, they’re just some of my favorites). I have limited myself to collection specifically because this is long enough already and if I start just adding essays it’ll never end. All of these were either purchased online for under $10, are available somewhere on the internet as pdfs, or were at my library, so if you look, you can probably find them somewhere (I say this bc while trying to find the authors of some of these I have been stunned by their retail prices and I’m assuring you, don’t be scared off by your initial search bc I sure as fuck did not pay $30):

Citizens: A Chronicle of the French Revolution by Simon Schama

Marie Antoinette: the Journey by Antonia Fraser (controversial but well-researched and approachable and I love it. I would recommend reading like. almost anything else first because Fraser does obviously focus on Marie Antoinette and her life and experiences; and while she does talk about the revolution, it isn’t the focus of this biography, and you won’t understand why it was necessary if you don’t come to it with a good grasp on the broader events outside Marie Antoinette).

A Day with Marie Antoinette by Hélène Delalex

Robespierre: a Revolutionary Life and Liberty or Death: the French Revolution by Peter McPhee

The Black Jacobins: Toussaint L’Ouverture and the San Domingo Revolution by C.L.R. James

If you’re at all interested in 18th century art, I recommend Rococo to Revolution:Major Trends in Eighteenth-Century Painting by Michael Levey

A People’s History of the United States by Howard Zinn is controversial. But it’s approachable and well-researched and if you don’t know a lot about American history, I recommend it highly (especially for Americans).

Eros, the Bittersweet by Anne Carson (okay literally everything by Anne Carson. All her essays, her poetry, her translations, her weird mashups, all of it. There are a few things I haven’t read yet but. I very much doubt you’re going to be able to go wrong, so just take what I’ve listed as my favorites)

This Changes Everything: Capitalism vs. The Climate and the Shock Doctrine by Naomi Klein

Black Against Empire: The History and Politics of the Black Panther Party by Joshua Bloom

Smoke Gets in Your Eyes: and Other Lessons from the Crematory and From Here to Eternity: Traveling the World to Find the Good Death by Caitlin Doughty (also the illustrations by Landis Blair are absolutely phenomenal. Look at this. I love it so much I pulled it out of the book to hang in my momento mori corner because it’s so beautiful.)

The Worst Hard Time by Timothy Egan

Alexander of Macedon by Peter Green is. okay we have a love-hate relationship, me and this biography; me, and peter green, but I have major issues with every single Alexander biography I’ve read and this was the first so if you want to start somewhere, I guess go for it.

The Empathy Exams by Leslie Jamison

The Honey Bee by James L. Gould. It’s out of date in some respects but a good, simple introduction into honeybee biology and behavior

Before the Deluge: A Portrait of Berlin in the 1920s by Otto Friedrich

Vanishing Bees: Science, Politics, and Honeybee Health by Sainath Suryanarayanan and Daniel Kleinman

Out of the Past: Gay and Lesbian History from 1869 to the Present by Neil Miller

Holy Madness by Adam Zamoyski isn’t by any means perfect, but it’s a alright introduction to the Age of Revolution. Just don’t let it be the only thing you read. It’s here because it has a special place in my heart as my introduction to it.

Between the World and Me by Ta-Nehisi Coates

Erotic Exchanges: the World of Elite Prostitution in 18th Century Paris by Nina Kushner

Radical Love: Introduction to Queer Theology by Patrick S. Cheng

Our Lives Matter: A Womanist queer Theology by Pamela R. Lightsey

Our Native Bees: North America’s Endangered Pollinators and the Fight to Save Them by Paige Embry

At the Existentialist Café by Sarah Bakewell (I really do not know that much about philosophy or existentialism specifically or this subject generally, so I have no idea where the faults of this book are, but I really enjoyed reading it and it made me think a lot. I have a feeling it’s very simplified so take it with a grain of salt as I did?)

Walden by Henry David Thoreau (just. just. it’s enjoyable but don’t get too into it please for the love of God). My copy (and I think most copies?) includes his essay Civil Disobedience as well which is very good.

Never Caught: The Washingtons’ Relentless Pursuit of Their Runaway Slave by Ona Judge

The Uninhabitable Earth by David Wallace-Wells

The Diaries of Virginia Woolf: I’m currently in the midst of volume 2 (1920-1924). They’re very enjoyable, but they’re something of an undertaking as all diaries are if you aren’t already very familiar with the biography of the person in question, so like. If you find yourself moving slowly don’t worry about it.

Gay Berlin: Birthplace of a Modern Identity by Robert Beachy

To Be Broken and Tender: A Quaker Theology for Today by Margery Post Abbott

The New Jim Crow byMichelle Alexander

The Environmental Case: Translating Values into Policy by Judith A. Layzer is a textbook that was assigned to me in my Enviornmental Policy class last semester and I really fkcing enjoyed it. It’s a book of case studies in environmental policy and it’s dense at times, but really interesting and enjoyable.

The Second Amendment: a Biography by Michael Waldman

Michelangelo’s Notebooks: the Poetry, Letters, and Art of the Great Master by Carolyn Vaughan. Just like. Genuinely. Genuinely. unintentionally hilarious. but also sometimes very sad, and very gay. I just adore Michelangelo. Just a shy foul-tempered repressed disaster. Jesus Christ.

#my next read is going to be richard ellmann's biography of oscar wilde #i'm v excited #henry speaks #vocallsama

[kachulein]

🌸85 Questions🌸

Since the last time I did this tag was a few months ago, I thought I’ll do it again. I was tagged by the cutie @taeyongsflatbutt thanks dear💖

Rules: Answer these 85 statements about yourself, then tag 20 people.

Last

1. Drink - tea and water

2. Phone call - I literally never call anyone besides my therapist, so yeah, my therapist :3

3. Text message - I’m currently spamming my baby @taetaejagiyaaa95 with links to dance performances of the dance club I’m in lmao

4. Song you listened to - I’m listening to What Now by Rihanna as I’m writing this (I’m actually listening to the playlist @taetaejagiyaaa95 made for me💖)

5. Time you cried - Today while listening to Grow Up by Stray Kids because the lyrics and the song in general hit me so hard that I cannot listen to it without crying T-T

Ever

6. Dated someone twice - nope, when I end something it’s a definite end and I’m not getting back together with that person

7. Kissed someone and regretted it - Actually yes... because there was this one time when this guy pressured me and kind of forced me into kissing him and I didn’t know how to escape ;-;

8. Been cheated on - not that I know of :o

9. Lost someone special - Haven’t we all? :/

10. Been depressed - Probably at some points in my life

11. Gotten drunk and threw up - yup >.< but I was like 13/14 years old back then and a stupid idiot

Fave colors

12. I seriously love all colours

13. Especially pastels

14. and of course black

In the last year have you…

15. Made new friends - YES💖

16. Fallen out of love - definitely (glares @ ex bf for treating me like crap and just ghosting on me without ever explaining his actions to me...so I guess that’s over for good)

17. Laughed until you cried - I always cry when I laugh tbh and my friends like making fun of me then xD

18. Found out someone was talking about you - probably but I can’t really remember since I push such moments out of my mind

19. Met someone who changed you - I believe every person you meet in your lifetime has some kind of impact (big or small) on you and thus changes you to some extent (maybe only just for the time being they’re in your life but still)

20. Found out who your friends are - Yes, I am actually better at reading people than it may seem^^

21. Kissed someone on your Facebook friends list - Idk I don’t use facebook anymore xD

General

22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know irl - Again, idk since I don’t use it anymore

23. Do you have any pets - a Kitten💖

24. Do you want to change your name - My last name, yes. Since I don’t like it and people like making fun of it smh

25. What did you do for your last birthday - I went out to dinner with my mom and stepdad and ended up having the whole restaurant sing me happy birthday^^ it was awesome omg

26. What time did you wake up today - At noon I think

27. What were you doing @ midnight last night - I was finishing off a reaction on my blog @kachuwritings and posted it

28. What is something you can’t wait for - My I am WHO album to finally arrive T-T

30. What are you listening to right now - Daya - New

31. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom - nah, I don’t know no Tom :o

32. Something that gets on my nerves - Someone interrupting me when I’m in the middle of daydreaming, people who brag about how great they are and in general just arrogance gets on my nerves a lot, animal cruelty is something that makes me extremely mad and sad and in general people with bad personalities/who abuse others/treat others badly, any form of discrimination and inequality in this world, our society and especially the unrealistic beauty standards our subconscious is being fed through the media 24/7 and so many more

33. Most visited website - Tumblr, YouTube and Vlive

34. Hair color - black^-^

35. Hair long or short - about middle length but I’m growing it out c:

36. Do you have a crush on someone - yesssss but not on someone I know irl glares @ Han Jisung from the other side of the world

37. What do you like about yourself - I really like being an empath tbh because it allows me to fully understand other people’s struggles and it can be nice to feel everything so deeply (love for example) (of course there’s also a downside to it) :3

38. Want any piercings - I already have 8 piercings on my ears but I always thought about getting nipple piercings someday but I honestly don’t know about that one^^’’ what do you think?

39. Blood type - A

40. Nicknames - Kachu

41. Relationship status - married to Han Jisung in my head single like a pringle

42. Zodiac - Aquarius

43. Pronouns - she/her

44. Fave TV shows (Can I add anime? I don’t watch other TV shows) - Sword Art Online, Tokyo Ghoul, Ouran High School Host Club

45. Tattoos - A violin key with a rose on my right forearm (that I drew myself and it signifies my love for music) and I’m thinking of getting angel wings on my shoulder blades but I need to draw them first kdjdksooidsfuhi

46. Right or left handed - right

47. Ever had surgery - nope

48. piercings - ears

49. Sports - dancing,,,mainly & hula hooping

50. Vacations - I’ve been to England, Spain, France, Germany, Switzerland(of course), Denmark, Czech Republic, Austria, Italy and Greece already but never outside of Europe jckdcudscn but I’m going to South Korea next year c:

51. Trainers - uhm... don’t really know what to answer here???

More general

52. Eating - I ate potato salad for dinner but that was around 6 hours ago lmao

53. Drinking - water^-^

54. I’m about to watch - Nothing since it’s 3.30am and I should go to sleep

55. Waiting - for better days *sigh*

56. Want - to be more motivated and not always feel exhausted and powerless on a daily basis because every little thing gets me overwhelmed lately and I feel so lazy since I lack power to accomplish anything and I have so much shit to do T-T 

57. Get married - not sure ._.

58. Career - Probably psychologist but I’m actually dreaming of becoming a singer&songwriter

Wich is better

59. Hugs or kisses - Depending on my mood either can be better

60. Lips or eyes - ....I love both equally tbh, beautiful eyes and plump lips really affect me sjakdansfunoj Hyunjin’s lips are a good example seriously they look so soft :( and Felix’s eyes are extremely beautiful and big wow

61. Shorter or taller - shorter because I’m too tall and I hate it ._.

62. Older or younger - younger, I don’t wanna grow up the world seems to only get worse the older I get akfnsdfisdsuld

63. Nice stomach or arms - hmmmmm I LOVE slim waists so I guess stomach?

64. Hookup or relationship - relationship!!! ALL. THE. DAMN. WAY. i can’t stand hookup culture :/ (but you do you fam, I’m not gonna judge anyone since it’s none of my business)

65. Troublemaker or hesitant - hesitant (I’m a good girl okay :c)

Have you ever

66. Kissed a stranger - I don’t think so omg

67. Drank hard liquor - yup, long ago though, I barely drink since I don’t like alcohol due to,,, reasons

68. Lost glasses - surprisingly, no xD

69. Turned someone down - unfortunately, yes :/

70. Sex on first date - It wasn’t a date... o.o it was just a hookup and that made me realize that I dislike sex without love involved and that’s how I found out that hookups are nothing for me^^’’

71. Broken someone’s heart - Probably the people I’ve turned down :/

72. Had your heart broken - ...yes

73. Been arrested - OMG NOOOOOO :o

74. Cried when someone died - Yes

75. Fallen for a friend - No never

Do you believe in

76. Yourself - I really wish I could

77. Miracles - not sure but I hope they’re real T-T

78. Love at first sight - naah

79. Santa Claus - yeeeah no, I’m not 5 years old anymore honey^^

80. Kiss on first date - Sure if it feels right

81. Angels - Not sure o.o

Other

82. Best friend’s name - I don’t have a best friend actually... (applications are open lmao)

83. Eye color - a really ugly brown istg there are so many beautiful kinds of brown eyes out there and mine just look ugly tbh D:

84. Fave movie - I have so many skaudbjf but Harry Potter is pretty high up on the list (I cannot trust people who dislike Harry Potter... my ex disliked it...yeah that just confirmed my hypothesis)

85. Favorite actor/actress - I always liked Audrey Hepburn, Olivia Newton-John, Julia Roberts, Keira Knightley, Emma Watson, Cameron Diaz, Meryl Streep, Amanda Seyfried, Pierce Brosnan, John Travolta, Patrick Swayze, Jack Black, Logan Lerman, Dylan O’Brien, as well as Leonardo DiCaprio, Johnny Depp, Orlando Bloom, Colin Firth and Hugh Grant - see, I can’t choose D:

soooo that was it yay^^ I’m tagging @marculees @taetaejagiyaaa95 @glamjae @bloomingfantasy @taetarte @1oonar @00njm @star-sam @hyunjinsgiggle @jbemin @orrin-uwu @redcucumbers @donghyuwus @alonelysquid and as always, you don’t have to do it💖

#85 questions #tagged #tag #questions tag #get to know me

[yourboatholiday]

VIPs and yachts: a love story!

It has always been love at first sight between VIPs and luxury yachts.

There is no lack of summer in which you do not hear about this or that famous person sighted onboard a luxury yacht while enjoying his vacation.

Footballers and sportsmen of all kinds, singers and movie stars, up to politicians and state leaders. Nobody seems to resist the charm of these floating villas. On the other hand, how to blame them!

Discover celebrities favorite yachts for charter:

In this article, we will talk about superyachts but from the point of view of gossip. In fact, we will try to connect many VIPs to their choices in terms of yacht holidays, dividing them according to their “role” in the entertainment world.

Yacht chartered by sports champions:

There are many sportsmen who do not miss the opportunity of a vacation on a luxury yacht every summer. First of all the great Formula 1 champion Lewis Hamilton, who posted some selfies aboard the Roxane on which he was aboard with his friends. This elegant 46-meter sailing yacht was made of wood and is equipped with the best nautical technologies and comfort. It can accommodate up to 9 passengers plus the onboard crew.

What about the soccer champion Cristiano Ronaldo? He spent a recent holiday with his family in the Balearic Islands on the Ascari yacht, a luxurious 36-meter party-friendly yacht equipped with the best in water games.

International actors and their charters: 

What about the most famous Hollywood actors who never miss an appointment with their favorite Superyachts. This is the case, for example, of Will Smith. The American actor took the opportunity to rent the Mischief yacht during a visit to the Amalfi Coast in Italy, where he was later joined by another great movie star, Denzel Washington. The 52.4-meter yacht chosen by Smith is characterized by a blue hull and an infinite series of gadgets. The quality of life on board is also guaranteed by the 13 crew members.

Another habit is certainly Leonardo DiCaprio. His appearances on the Topaz yacht during the football world cup in Brazil in 2014 are well known. A truly impressive boat, with its 147 meters, it is capable of carrying up to 64 guests. It is a real ship with a gym, private cinema, a conference room, and two helipads. Owned by Sheikh Mansur, this Superyacht is among the most expensive in terms of the charter.

DiCaprio himself in the company of Juliette Lewis, but also the actor Orlando Bloom, were finally spotted on the Rising Sun, a 138-meter yacht that can accommodate up to 18 guests divided into 9 cabins as well as 45 members of the staff on board. 

Where did singers on yachts go in the summer? 

Performers like Selena Gomez, Adele, Ellie Goulding, and Beyonce are certainly not less. The list of singers who love to relax in the sun in the middle of the sea certainly does not end here but it is enough to name some of the best Superyachts around.

The Leight Star, chosen by Selena Gomez, was launched in 1984 and modernized in 2009. It has 4 super-equipped decks and 5 cabins that can accommodate up to 10 people. Adele, on the other hand, was “satisfied” with the Ghost II, a 37.5-meter yacht moored in Sidney bay, while the British singer Ellie Goulding enjoyed a holiday in Saint-Tropez aboard the Silver Fast, a beautiful 12-guest yacht.

Beyonce certainly could not be missing from this list. The pop queen spent a holiday in Sardinia with her partner Jay Z and her daughter aboard the magnificent Halo, a 57-meter yacht specifically designed to sail around the world with its range of 5000 nautical miles.

Influencers and celebs top favorite charter yachts: 

Ending by mentioning some very famous social personalities such as Negin Mirsalehi, a well-known fashion blogger, and Kourtney Kardashian, a member of one of the most followed families in the U.S. of America.

The first one spent a holiday on the Gladius, a 38.7-meter motor yacht that can be rented for holidays in Anguilla (British Caribbean island) while the second was seen celebrating in the best Mediterranean ports such as Capri, Monaco, and Portofino aboard the 62-meter Sealyon.

Last in order of appearance but certainly not less famous, Bill Gates, creator of Microsoft and well-known philanthropist, spent a holiday in Sardinia on the Serene, a 134-meter Superyacht launched by Fincantieri Yachts in 2011 and still considered one of the most technically advanced yachts ever built.

Contact  now YBH Charter Brokers:

You can contact us by sending an email at [email protected] or by phone, calling [phone], available also on WhatsApp for both calls and texting.

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[maydayswiftie13]

rules // answer these 83 questions and tag some people

Thank you @alitoowell for tagging me!! I’ll tag: @stumblehome-tomycats, @redlipclassicstyles, @swiftiesparkleshine , @whiskeyxonxice , @swiftiesand1989 , @talk-turned-2-screams and anyone else that would like to answer 💓

the last:

1) drink: pepsi 😋

2) phone call: My Mom 🤗

3) text message: the fam, @redlipclassicstyles @stumblehome-tomycats and @alitoowell 💓💓💓

4) song you listened to: Like Gold by Vance Joy featured on Nation Of Two (WHICH YOU SHOULD GO OUT AND BUY IF YOU HAVENT YET BECAUSE IT IS BEAUTIFUL)

5) time you cried: On monday when I found out that Ali cried because I met James in Australia and it made me all emotional 😭

6) dated someone twice: nope

7) kissed someone and regretted it: sort of lol

8) been cheated on: no

9) lost someone special: unfortunately, yes

10) been depressed: never medically diagnosed but I’m sure I’ve been depressed before.

11) gotten drunk and thrown up: nope 😎👌🏻

three favorite colors:

12) turquoise/teal/neon blue

13) Emerald Green

14) Black & White together

in the last year have you:

15) made new friends: I thunk I’ve made some of the most incredible and loving friends this year thanks to James and Taylor. I LOVE YOU GUYS SO MUCH 😭😭😭😭 (you know who you all are)

16) fallen out of love: no

17) laughed until you cried: I mean who hasn’t 🤣

18) found out someone was talking about you: yeah, but I choice to just distance myself from them so 💁🏻‍♀️

19) found out who your friends are: all my friends are awesome

20) kissed someone on your facebook list: nope (well like besides the kiss on the cheek from relatives, but I’m sure that doesn’t count lol)

general:

22) how many of your facebook friends do you know irl: The majority, I don’t like to add random people to my Facebook.

23) do you have any pets: I have 4 doggos. A 17 year old chihuahua mix (Juliet), 10 year old Australian Shepherd mix(Basil), and two 5 year old chihuahua/terrier mixes that are brother and sister (Pedie & Prada) and then two kitties who hate but love me lol (Maddie aka madam fuzzal socks and Luna)

24) do you want to change your name: I did when I was younger but I’ve grown to like it.

25) what did you do for your last birthday: I spent the day with my mom in San Francisco shopping then eating the best ice cream then went with my roomie and friend jasmine to go get the best ice cream 😋 BUT THIS YEAR IM SPENDING IT WITH MIKAELA (and maybe Ali who knows) AND WE ARE SEEING VANCE JOY ON MY BIRTHDAY AHHHHHHH!!!!

26) what time did you wake up: about 11AM

27) what were you doing at midnight last night: trying to stay awake lol

28) something you can’t wait for: Ed Sheeran this month with Mikaela!!! VANCE ON MY BIRTHDAY!!! (Also with Mikaela (2nd row for one of the dates 😱) and maybe Ali 😉) TAYLOR FREAKING SWIFT IN NOVMEBER IN THE SECOND ROW and HARRY POTTER NEXT YEAR WITH ALI, also finally graduating school will be cool lol

29) when was the last time you saw your mom: Feburary 8th 2018

30) what are you listening to right now: A movie for my class lol

31) have you ever talked to a person named tom: I’m sure I Have at one point in time.

32) something that is getting on your nerves: my hair and the humidity

33) most visited website: twitter

34) hair color: medium/dark brown

35) long or short hair: Long

36) do you have a crush on someone: not at the moment

37) what do you like about yourself: that I’m approachable

38) piercings: ears (only one in each ear)

39) blood type: O+

40) nickname: my mom calls me bumblebee but that’s about it lol (my grandfather used to call me Maruchas before he passed)

41) relationship: just a single Pringle

42) zodiac sign: Virgo

43) pronouns: she/her

44) favorite tv show: A really liked teen wolf but it’s no longer airing sigh 😔 but Big Bang theory is always gaurenterd to make me laugh and as 8 year old me once said “friends is my favorite show”

45) tattoos: don’t you come after me with a needle if you want to live lol (I have none)

46) right or left handed: right

47) surgery: never had surgery

48) sport: I started swimming at the age of 3 all by myself 😋 and I used to swim competitively but I stopped swimming because of body image issues. I also used to play soccer until an injury caused me to stop.

49) vacation: I mean I’m in Australia for an entire year soooo 😉

more general:

51) eating: I’m picky sooo lol, I mean I like sugar AHAHAHA but who doesn’t. I’m just really picky if it has animal products in it.

52) drinking: water, carrot juice, Pepsi

53) i’m about to: go to sleep soon lol got class tomorrow

54) waiting for: My mother once told me not to wish my life away so I’m just going to live my life in each moment 😊

55) want: to make more friends from all across the world

56) get married: eventually but I’m not at that point in my life yet

57) career: something that involves traveling

58) hugs or kisses: hugs

59) lips or eyes: eyes

60) taller or shorter: taller

61) older or younger: older

62) nice arms or nice stomach: arms

63) hookup or relationship: relationship

64) troublemaker or hesitant: hesitant

have you ever:

65) kissed a stranger: no

66) drank hard liquor: yes and I hate it

67) lost glasses/contacts: I lose my glasses all the damn time but I always find them

68) turned someone down: yeah

69) sex on the first date: big no lol

70) had your heart broken: not that I can recall

71) been arrested: nope

72) cried when someone died: yes

73) fallen for a friend: no

do you believe in:

74) yourself: if I don’t, no one else will

75) miracles: considering James was standing behind me randomly yes... yes I do

76) love at first sight: I mean it’s possible

77) santa: in my household, you don’t get presents if you don’t believe ive in him 🤣

78) kiss on the first date: yeah

79) angels: I’d like to believe they are there

other:

80) best friend’s name: Ashely, and of course Ali, Jade, and Mikaela have sunk their way in

81) eye color: Brown 👁

82) fave movie: LOTR and Harry Potter series

83) fave actor/actress: After LOTR, Orlando Bloom will always have my heart but I also really like Eddie Redmayne. As for actress I like Cara Delevingne and Emma Watson 😊

The end!!

[princess-zzuko]

Romeo + Adaptation

The Tragedy of Romeo and Juliet by, William Shakespeare, is a well-known classic. It implements various concepts that are still used today. Love between two unlikely sources, youth in media, and the idea that the best love doesn’t last. 

The film Romeo + Juliet (Baz Luhrmann, 1996) is an adaptation of the very well-known play. An adaptation with a twist. If you haven’t seen it, do it. It’s a wild ride. If you have, you know the original text serves as the script but the movie is set in modern times.

Is that an okay thing to do? How many “authors” of a tale can there be until there are too many? Why is Leonardo DiCaprio crying the best thing to ever be produced on film?

With adaptation and intertextuality, different texts will and can inspire one another. This tale of forbidden love has been told and retold multiple times (with no sign of stopping).

There’s the Romeo and Juliet from 1968, featuring Leonard Whiting and Olivia Hussey.

This (in my humble opinion) is the closest movie adaptation I’ve seen of the play.

We’ve got Romeo and Juliet again in 2013 with Douglas Booth and Hailee Steinfeld.

There was a Romeo and Juliet on Broadway, staring Orlando Bloom and Condola Rashad.

This is by far my favorite adaptation.

Numerous storytellers, filmmakers, and artists have reinvented this story to either broaden its audience or convey how they believe the story should be portrayed or both.

Luhrmann’s, however, is the most intriguing. Combining the original text with the outlandish yet extravagant MTV influence of the late 90’s is a crazy genius move. It’s a gumbo of visual effects, action, and romance. And don’t worry. If you don’t understand what they’re saying, you will understand what they’re feeling.

Mercutio’s Queen Mab speech comes to mind. 

I could watch that scene twelve times a day and still not understand what he’s talking about. But the emotion he evokes as the scene goes on alludes to his pain. He is misunderstood, misjudged, discriminated against. His distress is evident. His tone crystal clear. And because he appears to understand his own words, it helps the audience decipher this scene’s intentions.

Thomas Leitch’s wrote an essay titled, “Adaptation and Intertextuality, or, What Isn’t an Adaptation, and What Does It Matter?,” A Companion to Literature, Film, and Adaptation. There, he described adaptation as a “problem child” as it is a form of intertextuality that challenges film binaries (Leitch, 101). No matter what, adaptation reinvents. A text could be made into a movie, or vise versa. A movie can even be an adaptation of a movie.

Some argue that Luhrmann’s adaptation is a cheap bastardization of a beautiful classic. Others adore it.

But what makes this movie an adaptation rather than an appropriation? It’s connection to the original text. The Tale of a Vampire is considered an appropriation because it is loosely based on Poe’s Annabel Lee. Luhrmann’s Romeo + Juliet, however, is directly related to Shakespeare’s play.

The great thing about adaptation is that a story can be retold in numerous unimaginable, unlimited ways. But it’s best not to go crazy as this can lead to an adaptation’s downfall. For instance…

Did I like the movie? Yes. However, I’m not sure how I feel about the “diversity” of the cast. Don’t get me wrong. Harold Perrineau’s performance as Mercutio was outstanding, and John Leguizamo’s Tybalt was beautiful. But these roles, particularly Tybalt’s, appeared to perpetuate racial stereotypes. Why is that the good guys are white and pure and angelical, but the Latino is diablo?

Was this a director trying to reach his diversity quota or was he really pushing for a diverse cast because he knew that was something the media needed?

I don’t know, but I know the media needs diversity and not just for diversity sake. I want to see heroes and heroines that are pure and angelical and black. I want to see Filipino crime fighters. I want to see a billionaire Hispanics. I want to see geniuses and pioneers who look just like me in Hollywood’s media. Not because filmmakers have to but because they want to. Because they need to.

And if we’re going to keep remaking Romeo and Juliet, why not tell the story from different perspectives. Imagine a movie where Rosaline witnesses the death of a man who she loves but cannot be with. Imagine a Romeo and Juliet where they have powers. Or perhaps the story is retold in Ethiopia. There are so many ways this story could be twisted. I think it would be cool to make it a musical about an Indian man and a woman from Ghana who are the son and daughter of a competing circus on the moon. Think about it.

The director also implemented Catholic imagery throughout the movie. There are multiple scenes in a Catholic church, including Romeo and Juliet’s death scene. A student even mentioned that the title of the movie uses a cross as the “+” in Romeo + Juliet. Juliet is even an angel in the ball scene.

Because the film is set in modern times, swords are exchanged for guns. This addresses the gang issues in California. I also wonder if it was a criticism on the violence of gangs as well. I actually appreciate the modern setting because of this topic.

Overall, Romeo + Juliet showcases the power of adaptation. It also begs the question: how far can we go with adaptation, and what are we going to do next?

Thank you for reading.

Pictures/ videos used: https://consequenceofsound.net/2016/11/baz-luhrmanns-romeo-juliet-and-the-currency-of-cool/

https://www.dazeddigital.com/artsandculture/article/23148/1/ten-iconic-moments-men-cried-on-film

https://www.kreattivita.org/en/event/shakespeare-film-festival-romeo-juliet-1968-3/

https://www.awardscircuit.com/2013/10/12/romeo-juliet-%E2%98%85%E2%98%85/

https://variety.com/2013/legit/news/broadway-review-romeo-and-juliet-1200643078/

https://youtu.be/s8q8S0ScJ1w

https://www.amazon.com/Percy-Jackson-Lightning-Thief-DVD/dp/B008YVDG6W

https://bazluhrmannisgod.wordpress.com/tag/romeo-juliet/

http://mentalfloss.com/article/84077/12-star-crossed-facts-about-romeo-juliet

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt2771200/

https://dragonball.fandom.com/wiki/Dragonball_Evolution

https://memebomb.net/romeo-and-juliet-memes-2/

[biofunmy]

‘Lord of the Rings’ Orlando Bloom returns to fantasy in ‘Carnival Row’

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Orlando Bloom plays police detective Rycroft Philostrate in Amazon’s fantasy series, ‘Carnival Row.’ (Photo: Jan Thijs, Amazon)

Orlando Bloom is returning to the fantasy past – but not as far back as “The Lord of The Rings” and “The Hobbit” – in his first TV series, Amazon’s “Carnival Row” (streaming Friday).

“Carnival” offers mythological creatures and magical elements, but it seasons that ethereal air with plenty of soot, courtesy of a grimy setting that suggests Victorian-era London with a steampunk vibe.

“It’s that dingy, dirty, industrial feeling that life is hard and real,” says Bloom. “It has that Dickensian England feel. When you put a fantasy in something that is so tangible and real, it works very well.”

Bloom’s Rycroft “Philo” Philostrate, who grew up an orphan and is a veteran of an ugly war, straddles both worlds in the eight-episode “Carnival,” which filmed its city scenes in Prague.

More: Orlando Bloom finds joy with fiancee Katy Perry (and the end of her feud with Taylor Swift)

He’s a detective investigating serial killings along seedy Carnival Row, a stand-in for Jack the Ripper’s Whitechapel in a city known as The Burgue. He’s also involved in a complicated inter-species relationship with the winged faerie Vignette Stonemoss (Cara Delevingne), a member of the fae folk, one of many species that migrate to The Burgue as refugees from wars started by men.

There, the fae folk and other species, including fauns and centaurs, try to survive under the oppressive thumb of unwelcoming humans.

“The story is about fear. The Burguish man fears the fae folk. The fae folk fear the Dark Asher,” a monster that preys on faeries, Bloom says. “Philo has a fear of being found out because he’s a man of secrets. He has things to hide.”  

On a larger level, the veneer of the fantasy and noir crime formats gives “Carnival” cover to explore difficult contemporary issues.

More: The best streaming series to watch in August on Netflix, Amazon, Hulu and more

Can romance take flight again? Winged faerie Vignette (Cara Delevingne), left, and human Rycroft Philostrate (Orlando Bloom) have a chance to rekindle their relationship in Amazon’s ‘Carnival Row.’ (Photo: Jan Thijs, Amazon)

“We’re talking about race, migrants and war-torn refugees, (but) it’s all cleverly disguised in a serial killing, murder thriller,” Bloom says.

The immigration story is especially relevant today, although its significance goes back long before creator and executive producer Travis Beacham wrote “Carnival Row” 17 years ago. 

“Carnival,” which has been renewed for Season 2, took a long, circuitous path to the screen. Once planned as a movie, it underwent expensive reshoots as a TV series. Beacham thought it would never get made, “so to be in Prague and literally be standing on Carnival Row and seeing these people in costumes … it’s very surreal,” he says.

“The migrant refugee issue has been going on for generations. But we’re seeing it today in more of an impactful way than ever before,” Bloom says. “The thing we are able to do beautifully is look at the humanity in many different painful situations that families around the world are suffering under. Whether you are afraid of people coming to your community or afraid of how you’re going to be received when you get to a community, we’re looking at all of it.”

Avoiding a : Orlando Bloom on his helicopter proposal to Katy Perry: Where can you ‘do this privately?’

Detective Rycroft ‘Philo’ Philostrate (Orlando Bloom) walks among the varied denizens of The Burgue’s Carnival Row in the new Amazon series, ‘Carnival Row.’ (Photo: Jan Thijs, Amazon)

Philo has an affinity for the immigrant fae folk, having seen them suffer firsthand in the war, and he feels protective toward them and others living in dangerous circumstances. 

“He’s is a tortured man, riddled with the pain of his past, but he ultimately displays love and empathy in his interactions with all the beings on Carnival Row,” Bloom says. “He is a light to those beings, a safe space.”

Philo also has a deeply personal affection through his past relationship with Vignette, who feels betrayed by the lover she thought was dead when they meet again in The Burgue. 

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Mr. Agreus (David Gyasi) is a rich faun who lives in The Burgue in Amazon’s ‘Carnival Row.’ (Photo: Jan Thijs, Amazon Studios)

Their complicated interaction suggests “an interracial relationship, the idea of a Burguish man getting together with a fae girl. It’s poked at and made fun of, but we explore the beauty and the humanity and the heart of a real connection between these two people and the tragedy of the way the world throws itself at them,” he says.

For all the sadness and misery, there are also scenes of visual beauty and elements of sex, romance and love.

“The subject matter is so serious and very real. It’s death and violence. So, if you miss the sexy element, then where’s the light at all?” Delevingne says. “And … it’s very necessary to the storylines. It’s an important element.”

It also can be eye-catching and even a bit funny, as when winged faerie women working in a hotel brothel literally take sex to new heights by raising their human clients into the air.

“If nothing else, the faerie sex levitation scenes are something to tune in for,” Bloom says.

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