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#@ me: just because you have a job with p good pay doesnt mean you get to be a dolphin you dumbass!!!!
surprisebitch · 3 years
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tempted to dolphin for arjuna alter
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solivagantsalix · 3 years
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my therapist is slightly worried about me 🥴
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konowhore · 3 years
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aoba johsai headcanons | watching a volleyball game with them
warning(s): spoilers from season 2-3, not proofreaded 
a/n: these are,,, very long HAHA and i’m so sorry that these are like,,,,,, all ending with reader and bf sleeping LMAO...
prompt: you watch a volleyball game with your boyfriend. you didn’t realize that it was a game between the two teams his team lost to.
oikawa
PLEASE HE WAS SO BITTER IN SEASON 3 IT WAS SO FUNNY????
but anyways
he had dragged you to watch the shiratorizawa v. karasuno game bc ‘you’re my gf i need emotional support<3′
you didn’t really know much about volleyball, maybe the basics like positions, but you were still excited to watch
his ass would choose the seat farthest away from the court simply bc he didn’t want to be seen and he would make the snarkiest remarks while watching about how they played and you would just be like: .. yea..... 
he’d realize that you’re a little confused abt what’s going on and then go:
“need me to explain anything princess?”
you lean into him and nod a bit, turning your head to smile up at him
his glasses reflect some light but he shifts them so he can look you in the eyes
cue you blushing bc the looks he gives you ?? <333 it makes ur heart cartwheel
anyways he rubs circles on the back of your hand with his thumb, explaining to you about the big play that just happened
you would just stare at him and take glances at the game because he was just so admirable
he knew so much, he played really well
you knew he worked so hard to try and get nationals, yet his team ended up not making it
out of the blue while you both sit and watch, you stretch up to kiss his cheek
oikawa, who usually isn’t too flustered, has pink-dusted cheeks when he looks at you
“yes princess...?”
“nothing, i just adore you.”
the growing smile on his face makes you giggle and rest your head on his shoulder
the game continues, oikawa continuing to make remarks about each team, observing the game
you get a little bored, hugging his arm and watch the ball go back and forth 
oikawa pays really close attention tho bc he offers to take you home awwwwww
“if you’re tired we can go-”
“no it’s okay!! i like hearing your commentary uwu”
stop he’s so in love with you
like he would stare at you after that and just be all <3
and so you two stay for the whole game (you fell asleep some point,,,,,, woke up once to buy water LMAO)
watching volleyball with oikawa makes you realize how much he has a passion for it and you just admire him. so. much. 
and oikawa would be so grateful that you’re so supportive and he’d tell you a thousand times after the game that he’ll do anything for you bc you tagged along and everything pls <3
matsukawa
you two hang out at your place and land upon the shiratorizawa vs karasuno game
you: aren’t those the teams you guys lost to
issei: yeah and what about it. 
he’d jokingly pout and hide his face in your neck
“you’re mean </3″ he’d whine
you laugh and run your fingers through his hair 
he grins, his hands going to rub your back as you two watch the game on the screen
you recognize some of the players from aoba johsai’s previous games, humming while watching them play
issei is only half paying attention
“well he’s cute,” you note, watching the camera pan through the karasuno members, only for it to stop on the captain
issei would roll his eyes and smack your ass a little LMAO 
“he’s short,” he’d retort, chuckling soon after when you look at him and roll your eyes back at him
“okay and”
BYE HE’D JOKINGLY GET MAD AND GO “go date your new boyfriend then<3″
it’s all fun and games between you two tho and it’s soooo cute !!
he can be a little shit but 
anyways you’re cheering for karasuno, occasionally going ‘look at their captain omg <3′ 
issei would sit up with you still straddling him and he’d just press kisses against your neck, making you giggle and try to push him away
“stopppppppp”
“not until you take your eyes off of him~”
you run your fingers through issei’s hair once more, smiling and leaning down to kiss him 
“don’t worry issei, i’m all yours”
he’d lay back again, letting you lay on top of his chest
the game keeps going, you and mattsun sitting in comfortable silence while watching
your eyes are heavy and you don’t pay any attention to it
but then you wake up hours later, still on top of your bf’s rising chest
(pls i love him god i want to hug him and cuddle with him he’s so fucking cute <3333)
hanamaki
tbh semi was one of your old friends from middle school so he asked you to come to his game,,,
your boyfriend wanted to hang out with you so you asked if he wanted to go
HONESTLY he’d be like ‘since when did you talk to people from shiratorizawa’ but he’d be fine with it
maybe he’s a little bitter but lmao
you two go to look for your friend, and when you see him, you call his name and hug him
“eita!!”
makki:  🧍
semi: hi uwu
you would introduce them to each other all smiley 
there’s tension and for what
semi: okay well i have to go warm up
you: bye eita ^^
makki:,,,
PLEASE????????
you two would sit close to the school section and holy shit is hiro glad that he didn’t wear his team jacket LMAO he would’ve gotten flamed
anyways not you cheering for eita even tho you have no idea what the fuck is going on lmao
hiro is amused and he just thinks you’re so cute tbh 
he’s staring at you watching you yell out semi’s name even tho he wasn’t in the starting lineup help.
he’s such a dumbass tho pls 
HE WOULD PURPOSELY BOO ONCE WHEN SHIRATORIZAWA SCORES THEIR FIRST POINT DAKJNDKJBJKD
not these girls staring at y’all um......
you’d scold him and he’s just :P
anyways you take a break from cheering and you sit, leaning on your boyfriend’s shoulder
“hiro are you doing okay?” you mumble, playing with his hand
“mhm, are you?”
you nod at his question and watch the game continue
“you sure you’re okay?? you seemed kinda tense, maybevenalittlejealous, when i introduced you to eita”
“i’m fine baby don’t worry”
him: me???????????? jealous>?????????????????? no.
YOU WOULD TEASE HIM SOOOO MUCH AND HE KEEPS DENYING IT EVEN THO HE VERY SECRETLY IS
after the game, you drag your boyfriend along with you to tell eita he did a good job
he’d give you a really big and long hug in which hanamaki is just standing there 
you gush about how great eita was, earning a big smile from him
when you leave the gymnasium hand in hand with hanamaki, you cling onto his arm, your smile never leaving your face
“soooo did you like the game?” you ask, looking up at your unusually quiet boyfriend
“mhm”
“did you like meeting eita uwu”
“yeah-”
“were you jealous??”
“no comment.”
cue you teasing him while his cheeks become the same color as his pink hair 
he’d just remove his arm from your grasp and then wrap it around your waist to pull you closer to him
(SORRY I GOT SO CARRIED AWAY .......)
iwaizumi
i know we all know this but iwaizumi hajime best bf idc !!!
he honestly wanted to go see the game bc he just wanted to see how the teams would play against each other
he had asked you if you wanted to tag along so you agreed
in all honestly, he didn’t think you would want to because you don’t usually seem interested in it whenever he talks about it, but in truth, you listen to every word he says abt it pls TT
he loves u so so much and u love that he’s passionate about volleyball HE JUST,, DOESNT REALIZE THAT YOU LISTEN
like he thinks it’ll bother you if he talks about it too much <//3
he’s the one who is genuinely surprised when you point out a strategy karasuno had used
“y/n i didn’t realize you liked volleyball??”
“you talk about it all the time silly”
and you give him a kiss on the nose and he just :0
“hajime cmonnnn you took me to the game you should tell me more about it uwu”
STOP. he literally,,, loves u so much
he holds your hand, his little smile never leaving his face
you lean your head on his shoulder, watching the game on the court
when the tall blond blocks ushijima’s block, you flinch a bit and stand up to look closer, seeing the tall blond yell and his teammates following suit
you cheer along with them, your boyfriend finally standing up to stand next to you
his eyes are on you only, your hair bouncing with you as you jump in excitement, your eyes shimmering with excitement
his smile just grows as you grin , turning to him in excitement
“did you see that hajime?? :D”
STOPP HES SO IN LOVE HE JUST STARES AT YOU .
and u just :D
“hajime..???”
YOU HAVE TO SNAP YOUR FINGERS IN FRONT OF HIS FACE AND HE JUST SNAPS OUT OF IT AND LOOKS AT YOU
“you’re very beautiful princess, did you know that?”
that alone makes you go pink and you playfully push him by his arm
“baby stopppp”
and you’re both just laughing and watching the game together, spending the whole day with your hands intertwined 
(he.. hajime best boy)
yahaba
you had started watching the game a bit after the first set started and your boyfriend was busy taking a shower
you knew a lot in all honesty, since shigeru happened to be on one of the powerhouse schools in terms of volleyball throughout miyagi
if he was gonna be honest he wasn’t expecting you to sit down and actually watch a game of volleyball intently
so walking into his room seeing you focusing on the karasuno v. shiratorizawa match surprised him a bit
“you watching the game?” he’d ask
“mhm!! it’s really interesting uwu”
he finds it absolutely adorable but then he tries to flirt and flex his muscles like “babe look i just got out of the shower” AND YOU JUSt,, KEEP LOOKING AT THE TV
yahaba: baby *bites lip*
you: babe get dressed and come watch with me
goodbye he just throws a shirt and some shorts on and basically jumps on top of you in which you yelp and go “shiGERU” and his mom is ON HIS ASS !!!!!!!! she literally comes in and she’s like “shigeru stop jumping onto your gf” and you rlly stick your tongue out at him
him: you’re acting like a child
you: you STARTED IT.
and you guys bicker a little and you just go “well you made me miss half the game” and HE GETS SO MAD HELPPPP
“BOOOOO”
him: clinging onto you, asking you to cuddle him
you: watching the game
eventually you give in and hug him, kissing him which makes him go quiet
“are you happy now you baby?” you ask him
“.......maybe.....”
and he just gives you a quick kiss, smiling and also giving you a slight eskimo kiss
the game becomes an afterthought as he brings up the beach volleyball game the third years organized for tomorrow all day, asking if you could help his team out 
(he insists that since you’re the ref, you should help his team consisting of kyoutani, kunimi, hanamaki, and another first and second year win bc kyoutani will just keep spiking outside the lines but you tell him it’s cheating LMAO...)
watari
(btw he’s so underrated i mean he’s not one of my faves but he deserves the world like y’all sleep on him and for what)
he’s super observant and he had been watching recorded games for a while to learn and make sure he plays his best next year pls </3 
he had invited you over to his place to hang out and you really wanted him to take a break from watching all of those recorded games
you emphasized this when you told him you would come over lmao
but alas.........
when he opened the door and you looked at the tv to see what he had put on, you saw the shiratorizawa v. karasuno game
watari: I CAN EXPLAIN.
you: .... sir.. 
PLEASE he’s taking your hand and pulling you to the couch while saying he’ll relax and just watch for fun
you sigh and follow him, letting him pull you down to sit next to him on his couch
you throw your legs over his lap, smiling while looking at him
he would give you quick, soft kisses all over your face and you both just fall into a fit of giggles
stop u literally love watching him gaze at the tv so passionately and observe how they play </3
YOU GIGGLE AT HIM AND HE’S LIKE “what are you laughing about?”
AND YOURE JUST LIKE “you’re so cute uwu”
so y’all are really just out here giggling at each other huh....... 
he??? pulls you into his lap and hugs you tightly
he’s literally so in love with you pls
so you guys just sit there and watch the game while you occasionally ask him questions
he’d be happy to tell you and he’s holding onto you the whole. entire. time.
honestly the game kinda slips away from you because you’re suddenly asleep on his chest, his arms around your waist, a hand gently rubbing your back
and he’s so grateful that he has a girlfriend who cares about him and worries about him :((
he’d turn off the game and then take a little nap with u <3 
kindaichi
tbh you spent so much time with him after the game his team lost bc he kept beating himself up for it which is >:(((((
him: i could’ve-
you: I LOVE YOU SO MUCH DO NOT BRING YOURSELF DOWN COME HERE LET ME KISS YOU
as you should !!
and when he tells you he’s gonna be watching the shiratorizawa vs karasuno match after school at his place, you tell him you’re watching with him too
“i don’t want it to bore you y/n-”
“it won’t bore me yutaro dw uwu”
no bc the way you’re both in love !!!!!
you would do anything for him tbh but you genuinely thought his passion for volleyball was cute :D
he was always striving to do his best and you think he’s absolutely precious
he’d turn on the game and then immediately come over to sit with you 
you lean onto him, clinging onto his arm and smiling
“y/n are you sure you wanna watch with me??”
“mhm!!”
he gives u a very soft kiss on the head and you can’t stop smiling bc you know he gets kinda shy abt showing affection
but he feels very warm and you start feeling very sleepy 
YOU TRY YOUR BEST TO KEEP YOURSELF AWAKE
you think him making comments abt the game or what he finds interesting is really cute but youre just,, tired ya know
he notices and he’s like “you should sleep-”
“noooo yutaro i’ll watch with youuuu”
“y/n cmonn”
you pout and lean turn to lean your forehead against his arm
“i don’t wanna </3″
“it’s okayyy you can sleep if youre tired”
you look at him and he smiles, leaning forward to kiss your forehead
you can’t help but melt and you’re just,, staring at him dreamily
he’s like “..baby..?”
and you just lean forward and kiss him
“you’re the best bf ever <3″
and he chuckles and goes “and you’re the best and cutest gf ever”
he has you lay down on his bed, your hair sprawled about his pillows
he lays with you, the two of you facing the tv and your back to him
he puts an arm around you, smiling
you slowly fall asleep, smiley and snuggling back towards yutaro
he kisses your head again, telling you that he loves you and hopes you sleep well 
he’s so<333
kunimi
he acts like he doesn’t give a rat’s ass about the game but you guys are chilling at his place and you flip to the channel that has the game on 
at first he’s like “you’re interested ?? in this ????”
you: babe,, of course i am,,  my bf is a volleyball player,,,,,?
PLS? he’d be like ‘oh ok’ and rest his chin on top of your head
it’s so chill between the two of you guys he’s literally just playing with your hair, humming a bit
you ask him smth but he asks you to repeat what you asked because he spaced out 
and when you ask again he just stares at you and is like ‘yes’
YOU JUST LAUGH AT HIM AND HE THINKS YOURE SO PRETTY so he just continues to listen to you ramble abt the game
eventually, he finds himself dozing off and you take notice as his chin starts feeling heavy on your head
“baby c’mon let’s take a nap-”
and he’d shake his head and go “we can finish the game-”
but you can tell he’s tired, especially from practice earlier today
so you turn off the game and turn so that you’re straddling his lap and hugging him tight
he wraps his arms around you and hums, kissing you
you smile and lean back to look at him, his eyes droopy from exhaustion
“sleep bby”
“mm only if you do too”
“i will dw <3″
and you just cling onto him, arms around his neck
he hums,  nuzzling your neck and you giggle
eventually, you two start breathing slowly, falling asleep
(tbh you didn’t rlly even care who won you just watched the game bc it was on LMAO)
kyoutani
you guys were hanging out in your room, his head in your lap while you sat up against your pillows
you were both occupied by your phones atm
he put his phone down, looking up at you curiously
you smiled as he reached to intertwine his fingers with yours
he had been at the gym more often, playing volleyball and practicing 
especially after their loss against karasuno :( 
today was one of the days that he decided he would spend his time being with you 
he doesn’t voice it often, but he appreciates how much you support him and care for him
(you picked him up from the gym the other day with some of his favorite deep fried chicken bits with the cute chicken packaging and he didn’t know how else to show you how much he loves and appreciates you other than by cuddling with you all night pls i’m </3)
anyways he’s just staring at you, admiring you, thinking about how much he loves you while you’re watching some tiktok your friend had sent you 
you had asked if he wanted to watch the game with you on your phone but he had been occupied thinking about you 
“what’d you say-?”
“i asked if you wanted to watch the game with me..? if you don’t want to it’s fine-”
“oh sure”
and he’d adjust himself so that he’s sitting with you, shoulder-to-shoulder, leaning his head so that it lays on top of yours
you’d just be all smiley, leaning into him more while playing the live stream of the game
he seemed focused, watching the game intently
you tried to focus on the game, but the only thing you could think about was the way kyoutani was holding your hand, rubbing the top of it with his thumb
eventually, as the game continues, he huffs a little, making you look up and smile at him
“you okay? we can stop watching if you want-”
“it’s fine-”
and then he adjusts himself, scooting away from you to lay his head in your lap
he reaches for your hand and puts it on his head, looking up at you
you oblige, gently rubbing his head and smiling
his eyes are closed, a slight hum coming from him
after a while, you realize kyoutani had fallen asleep, so you turn the game on your phone off
during this, kyoutani grumbles, reaching for your hand
you can’t help but giggle a little, rubbing his head while humming a little
“get some rest baby~” you croon quietly, staring at him lovingly
he opens his eyes a little, giving you a small smile
“you too okay..?”
“mhm-!”
when he closes his eyes, you smile, mumbling a little ‘i love you’ to your boyfriend
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pikaflute · 3 years
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hi, sudafed cleared my sinuses long enough to think so here’s a giant post about most of my charles headcanons
Playlist
OH btw here’s my 4 hour and 23 minute playlist for Charles. Enjoy. Yes I know I’m insane: https://open.spotify.com/user/pikaflute24/playlist/4DBxaaxbqsmJt9Fvl8AgwZ?si=OcXlYCdFRzOhuKa4p_HdUQ
General Headcanons
He was born November 24 1965. He’s currently 56, but I usually write him in his late 40s in most fanfic and content I make. So there’s this middle aged man....
He has hazel eyes. Sometimes they look green, sometimes brown. Sometimes they’ll be white but that’s when he’s using his magic so mind your business
Gear brand over his heart >:)c
:) i think he has piercings and tattoos, a skull (dead man teehee) on his upper arm, a tattoo of a date (the date pickles and him first met TEEHEE) on his left arm also has a tattoo on his arm of the day he “died” on his right. had his ears pierced when he was a teen.
Has a sweet tooth so hard. Smuggles in treats into the drawers of his desk just to snack on during the day and has a mini fridge just filled with ice cream and also sorts of other goodies. He loves brownies and cookies the most
Likes to work out and keep himself in shape. it takes his mind off of stressful things like work and the boys, and just take his morning practice sparring and doing various exercises in the mordhaus gym. 
he’s uh also very flexible so he does yoga a lot when he exercises. don’t. look too deep into that
cannot cook to save his life. he almost burned mordhaus down trying to make himself a sandwich
he can play guitar! he used to play it more often when he was younger but he rarely has the time to play it nowadays. when he does get to play it, it’s usually in private (and mainly songs by dethklok), or it’s to show off to a certain lead guitarist that yes he is playing that solo wrong
he’s ambidextrous but prefers using his right hand. he’ll use his left hand to spar in order to go easy on his opponents because hes a smug cunt
he’s 5′7 but intimidation factor adds a couple inches doesn’t it
has a scorpion named princess as a pet. he lets her sit on his desk sometimes and it scares the shit out of dethklok which makes charles laugh on the inside
hes also a cat person. one time toki brought a cat home and it settled on charles’ lap and he almost cried
loves to be a smug asshole and relishes in it. will not take shit from anyone, especially from some asshole who is trying to pull one over on him
he has no idea how social media works at all. will print memes out to show to dethklok, he’s very fond of cat memes specifically (i can has cheeseburger type beat)
he has no idea what any internet memes means he isn’t going to start learning. he is going to misuse internet phrases. are you boys, ah, finding the imposter? [cue five groans from dethklok]
knows a lot of languages. not a comprehensive list but: french, swedish, norwegian, spanish, italian, japanese, chinese, german, russian and korean
is very competitive. scarily competitive. once he starts losing in smash or mario kart all hell will break lose
very bad at showing emotions or affection, when he gets compliments he gets all red and quiet and mumbles a thank you. 
weird about being touched as well and will usually avoid it unless it’s with someone he trusts
speaking of, his love language is acts of service :)c
hates being called charlie or chuck, unless the right person calls him it ;)
he’s autistic. was nonverbal for most of his life and only talked to certain people, or anyone at all. he stims with his hands and uses his pens to fidget.
has a collection of novelty socks. he likes the ones that have polka dots or stripes
sleeps with a garfield plushie he had since he was younger. it helps him with the nightmares
when any of the boys need help sleeping (usually toki or pickles), he’ll sleep with them in his bed. after dying he had trouble sleeping some nights, so dethklok returned the favor and all piled up in his bed and helped him sleep. he didnt have nightmares after that night
hes nearsighted, and prefers to wear glasses over contacts
lactose intolerant, hes still eating mac n cheese and paying the price
metalhead but pretends to not be just to mess with his boys
crippling addiction to match 3 games. also loves to play minecraft.
overly self sacrificial. puts ones he love needs before his own, results in himself being very isolated and distant from those he cares about because he’s afraid of hurting them
his favorite colors are black and purple
coffee kinda guy. black coffee or bust
has a lot of cute novelty mugs to put his coffee in. he ones from places where dethklok tours, dethklok official ones (the only two that aren’t adorned with spikes), some cat themed ones, a couple that have ties and math references, and one from his boys that says “most brutal manager”. he drinks out of that last one the most
he has a couple of grey hairs and wrinkles, but he keeps them because they remind him that he’s human. also pickles said old men were hot but you didnt hear that from me
likes to play chess but he can never find a good opponent. all the klokateers are too scared if they win and dethklok is too distracted to ever play with him or they end up losing to quickly if charles plays against them
really wants kids. he babies his sister’s sons and daughters a TON (uncle charles always brings the best gifts :) ) and also treats toki like his own son in a way. toki doesnt mind, he really appreciates the love
speaking of, toki does call charles dad once and it makes charles cry for like. a week and a half
his favorite dethklok song is the gears :)
he likes to collect knives as a side hobby, his favorite of his collection is a sleek black one with skulls on the handle
he has a motorcycle and likes to drive it around sometimes to just be alone with himself. it’s all black with a red gear on it
lightweight but only if he drinks the amount dethklok drinks. can hold his alcohol fairly well if he drinks like a sensible human, prefers brandy and wine
he can smoke cigars to be sexy for me and me ONLY
likes to read in his spare time. he likes mystery novels and science fiction
he has soft spot for cheesy sitcoms, they’re his guilty pleasure
his favorite youtuber is lockpickinglawyer. yours should be too
usually sleeps in only his boxers but will wear a shirt if its’s cold. he tends to sleep on his side (also wants to be the little spoon when cuddled but he will never admit that)
takes vacations sometimes away from the boys despite his worry that something will go wrong (it will!). many of his vacations are usually going to visit his family and going to the shore with them, or travelling to somewhere new for a change (cue charles being a yakuza substory on his one vacation per year)
he can sew pretty well. learned from his mom and used to sew the whole his sister use to put through her soccer uniform.
can also do makeup, and usually does it for one of the boys of there’s no one else around to help
bites his lip when he’s nervous. which is a lot
likes chococat and gudetama. he’s a man of tastes
laughs really loud if you catch him off guard. he snorts sometimes too. he’s embarrassed by it, but i think its’ cute
loves law and order obviously 
he likes men
has a lot of pent up rage. very good at compressing it. sometimes
as high priest, he stays up very late trying to decipher the ancient prophecies that dethklok needed to fulfill. he doesnt sleep very much when he starts out because he misses home, so the band makes him come back (or else)
also as high priest he becomes more intune with magic granted to him after he died and he mainly uses his magic to protect his boys when they go back to being a band. also to fuck with them
the band he managed before dethklok was a band named savior who said they were a metal band with a unique sound, but that unique sound was actually just being a christian metal band that were bad at playing music. they also treated charles like shit and blamed him for them doing so poorly with sales and shows. had an unfortunate “accident” with a tour bus after charles had enough of their attitude towards him.  he denies he had anything to do with it (he did.)
Family/Childhood
He’s the baby of the family. Spoiled rotten to the max. He doesn’t admit it though but whenever he comes home you know he abuses the “:)c im the favorite” card
He has 4 older sisters: Caroline who is a high school civics teacher, Cynthia who is a librarian, Callie who is a coach for a soccer team, and Charlotte who is a lawyer/manager who manages Ladyklok, which gets awkward (and funny) when Abigail starts dating the lead singer Natalie
charles is actually one of the tallest in his family. his dad is 6’1 and his older sister Callie is 5’11. cynthia is 5’6, caroline is 5’6, and his mom and charlotte are 5’5.
his mom is a doctor and his dad is an accountant. his mom’s name is giovanna and his dad’s name is elijah
caroline is the oldest sister, followed by cynthia, callie, charlotte then charles.
Charlotte and Charles are sworn enemies since they were born on the same day a year apart and basically have the same job. They do love each other though
His father calls him Charles. Caroline and Cynthia call him Charlie. Callie calls him Chuck. Charlotte calls him Charles (derogatory). His mom calls him a whole slew of nicknames that she made up when he was young (she calls him cheese ball and he turns red)
caroline has a wife (lauren who is a chef) and two kids (evan and shelby)
cynthia is dating a coworker (viola)
callie has a husband (john who is a stay at home dad) and they have three kids (brenda, melissa, and jeff)
charlotte is dating ladyklok (and abigail). this is a weird flex on charles i think.
He had a race car bed when he was like 5
He also was also one of those kids at family game night. He almost killed Cynthia over a game of monopoly
Always got to lick the spoon first after his mom baked brownies
He grew up in North Jersey (derogatory) (also yes im projecting state shot)
He’s also Italian (derogatory)
He got bullied in middle school for a little bit but once his older sisters found out, oh boy did all hell break loose
Was in band in high school. He played flute (DONT TALK TO ME I LIKE PROJECTING), he was of course a soloist and incredibly smug about it
Took gymnastics as a kid. Can do a backflip on command. Also very flexible.
First manager gig was helping his sisters sell girl scout cookies. They raked in a lot of profits when baby bro was behind the scenes. His cut was eating thin mints for free
Loved Star Trek when he was a kid
Was incredibly gifted, and taught himself to read at a young age. didn’t talk that much though
was always sick when he was little. he would always get sinus infections and colds if someone even sneezed weird
was in mock trial in high school. one guy on his team was a jerk to him so charles made it a point to be this poor kid’s nemesis
was on the student council, treasurer of course.
was also in nhs, and he was treasurer there too
was that kid who insisted on doing the group project by himself because he didn’t want to wait on anyone to finish their part
was super rowdy as a kid, always got into trouble but his mom was a little lenient of punishment (hes a mommas boy)
when he was like super young he bit people cause he was just a little monster (charles' sisters: mom charles is biting again. charles, biting one of them: im not :/ sheesh)
wanted to be a lawyer since he was 7
put his own siblings and parents on trial and would win every trial and would always get the last cookie or a higher allowance
he shared his room with his sister Charlotte and they would set up a pillow fort on one of the beds and stay up late reading together 
loved going to the beach as a kid, his mom still has his collection of shells from the beach
on the boardwalk, he would dominate at claw machines anad carnival games. he won a bunch of plushies from himself (and his sisters obviously)
his dad and him have a super close bond. they watched star trek together and also like to watch how the stock market would do. his dad was also sometimes the judge in charles’ mock trials at home
they were very supportive when he came out as gay, he was also the first of his sibilings to come out of the closet
College
Got his masters in business management at rutgers and a JD (law degree) from seton hall law.
Started college when he was 18 (1983) and ended college when he was 26 (1991)
Wasn’t a party guy. Never got invited to many, but he never went unless a certain redhead was in town
Sustained himself off of ramen, coffee, and SSRIs to get his masters (hey man i feel ya)
Did weed like three times. Three of those times were because of, you guessed it, a certain redhead
Speaking of, his first time having sex was in his dorm with Pickles. Pickles also kicked him off of the bed (those beds are fucking tiny) while they slept, and almost burned Charles’ dorm down trying to make toast the next morning
Absolute did not do essays until the night before. Bad habit that made it’s way into Dethklok managing when he’s forced to write a legal brief before 12 am.
Loved calculus 2 for some reason. Nerd
Had a mullet. Pickles thought it was hot (still is) while Charles would rather die than remember anything about that horrid hairdo
Also went through his goth/emo phase while in Law School. He stuck out amongst the sea of sweater vests and polo shirts
Was in a band with his fellow college bandmates. The band was called Habeas Corpses and he was the lead singer who also played guitar. Their sound was kind of similar to TWRP’s first two EPs (The Device and 2nite). they had a grunge aesthetic, and yes charles dyed his mullet black (with a purple streak), for the band.
his bandmates were all fellow law students. dillan was on drums, margaret was their bass guitar, and nick was their keyboardist. all three of them also got tutored by charles while in law school. they are still best friends and write to each other sometimes
Was on the debate team, but uh kicked off due to be very competitive (he threatened to punch the opposing debater)
Was also in the chess club, also kicked off for being too competitive (lunged at a kid for cheating)
After being kicked from the two previous clubs, he joined fencing, his very competitive nature made him the best in the state
nick (the guy in charles’ band) was charles’ roommate the whole time they were in college. they may or may not have had a brief relationship before they realized they would be better as friends
nick also has a nes and charles loved to played zelda and wrote an entire guide for himself because he’s was that into the game (nerd)
occasionally would be found sleeping in the library on campus
wanted to be an RA but the resident association at his schools thought he was a little much. charles took this as a compliment
worked out a lot between studying and classes. a lot of jocks underestimated him because of his size but charles was just :) [casually lifts something heavy]
a lot of fellow classmates thought he was super cool cause of the leather he wore, and how cool and quiet he was, too bad they didnt know he was a huge nerd
tried skateboarding. once.
had a cadillac that barely started and drove like a piece of shit but that was charles’ baby
pickles tried to have sex with charles in said car btw, charles almost killed him for even daring to suggest to tarnish his beautiful baby
has damaged his back permanently because of all the books he used to carry around in his crappy back pack
did some modelling for one of his friends in college. he was very attractive and got some other modelling job through it. he tries to hide that from the boys in the future because he thinks it’s embarrassing
Relationship with Dethklok
Pickles - he’s known the drummer the longest out of any other member, and if you couldn’t tell by now, he had a brief relationship with the drummer back in the 80s (and maybe also still has a crush on him :)). charles respects and admires pickles’ talent as a musician and sometimes they play together when they have time alone. he tries to be there when pickles has a relapse in either emotions with his family or something else, but still tries to maintain a distance because he thinks that pickles doesn’t feel the same as he did in the 80s. (he does btw). nothing could break the bond these two share. not even death
Nathan - understands nathan’s quiet nature (nonverbal kings!) and strive for perfection in everything dethklok creates because he is the same way. their similarities allow them to connect on a level that allows nathan to open up about his feelings that he likes to lock away. nathan also gets charles to open his feelings up and actually care for himself for once in his damn life. charles also helps nathan with the depression he develops after charles dies and how to deal with it despite it being not brutal. nathan wants to give back and he does by becoming one of charles’ closest friends (and maybe even lovers hehehe)
Toki - charles has taken it upon himself to be toki’s father figure after seeing the way toki’s family has left him for essentially dead. ever since toki joined the band, charles has made it a point to be there for him whenever he needed it. even if it meant spending late nights reading to toki or sleeping over in toki’s room to help him sleep, he’ll do it. he blames himself for toki’s disappearance but toki assures him that he did the best he could. toki calls him dad a lot after doomstar. it makes charles cry.
Skwisgaar - unstoppable asshole meets immovable object. skwisgaar sees himself above everyone else like he does with the other dethklok members but with charles, skwisgaar knows that charles isn’t intimidated by him nor will he bow to the guitar god in anyway. this develops a game of cat and mouse between the two, with skwisgaar trying to no subtly push charles’ buttons and to see what makes him ticks, while charles resist him at every turn with a smug ‘:) is that all you got’ and it delights him to finally see the guitarist squirm under pressure.
Murderface - at first the two are very. distant to say the least. murderface used to see charles as unemotional robot and charles was fine with that and accepted the distance. overtime however, and especially after charles died, murderface warmed up to charles confiding in him things he hasn’t told the band, mainly things about his insecurities because charles is ‘fucking smart with crap like this’. and charles helps him and is happy to see him work out his problems and not bottle them anymore like the rest of his bandmates. charles also enjoys murderface’s company as a friend as well. and….he’s gonna help murderface the most with the whole traitor stuff too.
Abigail - mlm and wlw hostility. but seriously they’re good buds. he sympathizes with having to deal the moronic actions of dethklok on a daily basis and also thinks she’s really intelligent and overall fun to hang out with. they take lunch breaks frequently together and like to make fun of people at dethklok dinners together as a fun activity together. abigail will bully his ass once she finds out she’s dating charles’ sister and WILL bring up those baby pictures to get a higher raise thank you very much
Knubbler - can you say coworker besties! like abigail, he gets along because they both have to deal with dethklok being, well dethklok, but with knubbler, charles can relax a little more. the two cause problems on purpose just because they can. the two are also close friends and knubbler tries to get charles to relax for once in his life, and despite charles protests and objections, he sometimes caves and hands out with his friend (maybe boyfriend OOOOO who knows)
Sex Headcanons (IM SORRY)
um maybe he can have a giant dick (10 inches for me), it do be swinging though
daddy kink (everyone stay on this side, ill take care of him….come to daddy ;)c)
likes to do roleplay. he has a lot of costumes prepared for when his partner wants to do a scene with him
likes to bite and be bitten during sex. after a very long night, he’ll be covered in bite marks, it’s kinda hot
no gag reflex ;) he likes to deepthroat but good luck trying to get him to go down on you without him teasing
remember how i said he was flexible like eight times? yeah he uh, uses that a lot to his advantage. likes being fucked in weird positions because of it
the suit stays on during sex
he likes topping because he likes to be in control of everything he does all the time, but really wants to be told what to do sometimes and will let those he trusts do that for him
he has a dick piercing i know it
he's a very busy man, so he relies on his huge collection of toys he keeps in his bedroom and office
really good with his hands. as soon as those hands are on you, its game over
he loves to do it on his desk, makes him feel powerful. when he gets blown under his desk, it really takes all of his willpower to not cum immediately
really sensitive in weird places, specifically his ears
he likes to cuddle after sex, hes the little spoon :)
likes to be tied up, sometimes he’ll get tied up under his suit
mating press and riding are his favorite positions, giving and receiving
size queen, likes large toys and well ;)
has a private room that he sometimes goes to relieve stress, it has a fucking machine that he likes to use often when his job gets too stressful
he’s sucking people off at the klokateer glory hole, he’s uh, very good at what he does
likes to be spanked and like to spank
uses collars and leashes
maybe the klokateers can fuck him, if they’re good ;)
freeballing
likes cum on his face but doesn't seem to realize that means he’ll get cum on his glasses and will need to clean them
he can wear a chastity belt :) for me
likes being came in but will still complain about being gross after
pretty much up for anything, he’s not picky, he just wants to be in control and get off
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foryouthegays · 3 years
Text
Forming a secret organization [Dream SMP] liveblog and summary!
Good laugh times: 7:40, 1:18:15, 1:19:25
Protect mr philza minecraft from baby zombies (he really went all out on that bit today): 20:35, 32:40 34:45, 1:16:35
Sellout pog: 30:45, 1:00:50, 1:30:55, 2:01:15
Summary:
Techno started the stream in the Nether. He quickly went back to the overworld and to his house, where he meets up with Phil and Ranboo. He mentions that the house smells like gunpowder, and Phil quickly ushers them outside and they continue their conversation.
Techno nudges Ranboo away from the conversation, and he leaves the call. Phil and Techno watch as Ranboo leaves the house, and then Techno tells Phil his news. He talks about how taking down L’Manburg wasn’t the greatest plan, especially as he’s only one person. He wants to bring other people to their anarchist ways.
Phil agrees to form a secret organization for anarchists, because they can’t fight ten to one.
Techno and Phil go to Ranboos house, asking for a feather, and Ranboo asks if he’s getting kicked out. They say no, and then Ranboo says that he has something that might get him kicked out.
He talks about how he sometimes doesn’t remember what he does, and that he was the person who blew up the community house.
Techno asks why, and Ranboo says he doesn’t know.
Phil and Techno agree that they don’t really care about the community house, and Ranboo continues, saying that he has one of the discs. Phil and Techno agree again that they don’t care about the discs at all.
Techno and Phil leave.
Techno leads Phil to a stronghold, which he calls a ‘structure,’ and they cover it with gravel to hide it. They enter the structure, and they find a library, some useless doors, and keep exploring, finding nothing. Techno is confused, thinking that there had to have been a reason for the stronghold's existence.
While looking at a connected Abandoned Mineshaft, Techno finds an enchanted golden apple.
They go into the lower parts of the stronghold, and they find a prison. Techno mentions that the bread he found earlier tasted around 2,000 years old, which gives us a rough (and joking) estimate of when the stronghold was made.
Phil finds a strange portal, and they talk about how advanced the previous civilization must had been, to be able to make unbreakable blocks. They hear a villager writing, and dig up to a strange room.
It ends up being the igluu where Orphans parents lived, and they start laughing, but then, DreamXD logs in. He breaks the portal, and then leaves. Techno begs dream to put the portal back, because it would’ve added to the lore, and that their characters didn’t know what it was, and were going to use it as a table.
Dream logs in again, and puts one (1) portal frame block down, and then leaves again. Phil tells Dream how to place the blocks incorrectly so they wouldn’t form a portal, and he logs in to place them back.
DreamXD hears Techno joking about going to the end, logs in, and then logs out when Techno says he’s joking. Then, Techno explains the difference between DreamXD and Dream, saying that DreamXD has canonical access to creative mode, and is like God, but Dream is just some homeless teletubby. DreamXD logs in, says ‘they actually are I am the protector,” and logs out.
In chat, Techno asks ‘who was that dram fanboy, how did he get whitelisted,’ and DreamXD logs in again, hits Techno with a sword a few times, and logs out.
Techno and Phil decorate the meeting room a bit, and they start talking about what the association should be called. Techno says that he wants it to be the ‘[blank] Syndicate,’ and before they can agree on anything, Ranboos nametag is spotted, and they agree to kill him if he comes into the meeting room.
Techno puts down a sign with the organization's motto, which is ‘Sic semper tyrannis,’ which means ‘thus always to tyrants.’
He starts writing in the manifesto.
“This syndicate is formed to promote anarchy and fight tyranny in all its forms.
“We shall have no Leader; no member shall be compelled to act if they do not choose to.
“No member shall reveal information about the Syndicate to outsiders.
“Technoblade shall serve as the Recruiter to induce new members into the Syndicate with Approval from a Majority of members.”
Phil and Techno leave the Stronghold, and realize that the Igluu wasn’t actually Orphans parents, but instead a different Igluu that Ranboo had been using for Cartographers. They go back to the house, planning to meet with Ranboo, but on the way, they find a strange tower made of stone. Its hollow, but theres no chests or anything inside. They continue and meet with Ranboo, who has gifts for them. Techno gets a Netherite shovel with Efficiency V, Mending, Silk Touch, and Unbreaking III.
He brings them under his house, and we find he has a ‘comfort room,’ made of netherrack, that has several mob heads on the walls, an extra set of armor, and pets sitting next to the ladder. They talk about the map on the wall, and Techno seems concerned, or a bit scared.
Techno and Phil leave the call, and talk about how extremely strange the room, and Ranboo, was. They recount their adventure, and move the villagers into a more efficient layout. Ranboo joins them after a few minutes, at 1:38:00, and they work on curing the zombie villagers and giving them jobs
Liveblog:
I love when technos computer says he isnt streaming so he just rambles about that before it says he does and then he does the starting the streammm thing. Also if u havent heard the starting the streammmm thing u r missing out it is amazin
Techno pls get a new laptop im gonna cry
HE SAID THREE HE SAID THREE if u dont know, techno says three v nicely
“I havent even shown you the secrets, how would you guys be able to snitch??” SIR????
Oh my god is he using his phone to read chat,,,,,i hate him i hate him so much u haVE 5 MIL SUBS AND CANT EVEN GET A SECOND MONITOR WHYY
Ranboo!!! Philza minecraft!!!!! Hi!!!
5:40 ‘why does it smell like gunpowder?’ Techno there is no smell in minecraft. Lore pog?
6:45 AKDFJGLSA RANBOOS FUNDY IMPRESSION IM
8:45 ‘any second now its gonna be 11 percent updated, and thats like halfway done, if you think about it’ adhd autism solidarity right there lmao
I dont think techno can physically pay attention to lore for more than a minute at a time. He just like, sees a dog and zooms in on it while someones talking and its such a mood. All techno know is get distracted, kill orphans, protect philza minecraft, and anarchy. Love him
10:45 he just got COMPLETELY distracted w his laptop im actually crying form laughter
So uh. 17 mins in. Techno (without saying anything). Kills a zombie that was trying to kill ranboo. Thats. Thats a thing he only does for people he trusts. Uhhh
Technos voice at 21:30,,,,,,hhghn why is he like this why is he randomally doing weird voices
26:35 ‘hacker voice: were in’ HGKDFJSL
Ok but techno making fun of doors is so funny tho. Also he rlly did go all out on the baby zombie bit tdoay im actually crying
Techno when phils being chased by two creepers, a few zombies, and skeletons: i do not see it
Techno when phils being chased by one (1) baby zombie: loOK OUT PHILZA MINECRAFT
42:00 god apple poggggg
45:50 techno sir why do u know what 2,000 year old bread tastes like
Dsmp techno :handshake: minecraft story mode techno
Hating doors
Dsmp techno :handshake: smp earth techno
Living right above a stronghold
48:35 ‘dude, they had all this super advanced technology because they didnt waste time trying to figure out how to make doors’ FSKHGJDAL
50:25 UH?? WHAT IS THAT LMAO
OH ITS ORPHANS PARENTS LMAOOOO
GDFJKHSL DREAM HI
51 MINS IN HGJSKDFJASL DREAM PUT IT BACK IT WAS A GOOD TABLE DREAM
56:25 ‘listen, I’ve read a lot of mythology Phil, and nothing bad has ever happened from angering the gods.’ You SURE about that?
I will actually never get over techno making fun of dream its so funny to me 1:01:10
I am so, so extremely queer for technos planning/schemeing voice like when its kinda quieter and deeper n slower? Hhgnn
Also is latin canon in this universe? Pog
Asmr Technoblade makes a cult :)
Ok ok ok ok SO i know that techno wants to make all the members equal (and i do think that hell try his best to make that possible) but bc hes just,,,so FREAKING powerful both in terms of pvp and resources, i feel like his opinion IS gonna matter more, but also im p sure hes the writer of the arc so like. He has more important opinions anyway so unless he is v obviously controlling the other members of the group, i think this could be a fun collab thing. And i am SO excited to see all yalls analysis for what other people think of him ahhHHH i love analysis.
1:17:10 “whose idea was it to make baby zombies stronger? Why are the babies stronger?? Have you ever fought a baby in real life? I have, and it was trivially easy to defeat, Phil.” TECHNO????
Also i can NOT believe that someone thinks techno doesnt use dark humor,,,,have u WATCHED his videos?????
1:25:05 Like literally RIGHT after he makes a joke abt how ranboos shovel’ll be good for digging graves for his enemies, which was taking soooo long before
Ah yes, technoblade, the 21 yr old child 1:28:40
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gcmblingdice · 3 years
Text
..
Hopefully my next paycheck will push me having 2000 so i can pay off my aunt so I can get my car this weekend. Gotta make sure too that I can also pay off dad too (but he says to wait til next week?) But then i gotta like buckle down again om finding insurance.
Im also afraid Ill loose my state insurance and wont be able to afrord my meds because i cant afford insurance (unless i go through my work but idk how much extra that will be out of my paycheck.)
Yes I am moving in with my boyfriend and his partner, but I think its only until I am able to be on my own??? Idk. I need to get that clarification but i always forget.
Im also nervous and worried that once I move my dad may decline and idk. Also im not over how my brother keeps joking about me paying dad back cause its his inheritence too.
Like we already did the math and between bills going out and income coming in, he would have 600-700 a month of left over money to use for gas and grocerries etc. He can easily rebuild that 6k+ (8k if we counting the vet) and i mean I understand he wants the money back, but he keeps asking me ans reminding me and i keep telling him Ill.pay him back.
Then he also says to not rush it, but will remind me.of what i already paid him and its like SIR PLEASE? AND I AM SO DONE.
Im full on bulimic again and dont fucking care much anymore about shit and Im slipping. I find myself drinking more and more.
I resubbed to the gym but only went once and feel like shit. Like good job ya dumb bitch 10 dollars wasted a month. (I been trying to do evening walks tbh but i wanna do the gym for real again)
OH AND EVEN THO I CLOSED THE CREDIT CARD MOM HAD FOR DAD I FORGOT I NEEDED TO 0 OUT THE BALANCE LOL I FUCKING HATE IT SO THAT ONTOP OF EVERYTHING.
Man i just do not. Not to mention the walking on eggshells and I am still not over how my dad's side has villainized me ever since the funeral when i told them to fuck off. Also the gays are pedo narrative is one they cling tigthly too because CLEARLY ME HELPING TO LET THIS 13 YR OLD BE HEARD AND ENCOURAGING HER TO LEARN MORE ABOUT HER GENDER AND SHIT IS BIG NONO AND I AM I NOT ALLOWED TO HELP A YOUNG QUEER BECAUSE SHE IS 13 ANE DOESNT KNOW WHAT SHE IS FEELING AND ITS A PHASE.
Man fuck off. The way she was so excited to see someone who was also queer, who gave her space to vent, made me cry.
My aunt knows of her being gay (or qieer) but even she says that the girl might change her mind.
MA'AM. and even if she does end up not being queer ( which i highly doubt since she confessed she was always different in that she liked girls and those who were non gender conforming and always said she felt more seen by gay tiktok and that she wants ti learn more before she can settle on who she is, but she isnt allowed...
BUT APPARENTLY ME JUST SHOWING BASIC DECENCY AMD GIVING HER SPACE TO BE IS BAD AND MAKES ME A P*DO???
and people on either side of my family constantly telling me i look like mom or how well I am doing when ITS CLEAR I HAVenT HAD TIME TO HEALTHILY PROCESS ANYTHING BUT OKAAAAY AND YEEESSSS
Tell me Im selfish because I want a safe space to grieve. Tell me I should be more respectful of my dad cause he is hurt too. Also we love them telling me i am not allowed to speak out on my own abuse at my dads hands because "now you onownyour dad is a good man"
FUCK OUT HERE WITH THAT SHIT. ON GOD.
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venusmages · 4 years
Text
otp tag.
tagged by @solasan​, thank u!!!!!   tagging: @ritualism​ and @editoress​ i think all my other Wayhaven ppl have been @’d already
PENNY AND FELIX EDITION
DISAGREEMENTS.
who is more likely to raise their voice?
i neither! penny if i had to choose, but shes usually p good at keeping cool. and felix doesn’t seem like a shouty person anyways.
who threatens to leave but never actually does?
N/A
who actually keeps their word and leaves?
N/A
who trashes the house?
N/A
do either of them get physical?
N/A
how often do they argue/disagree?
i think their first disagreement is in book 2 when Felix got hurt during Sanja’s rescue. Penny feels super guilty about it and is worried Felix is brushing it off when he has a right to be upset. She’s kinda haunted by that whole situation and the choice she had to make. Other than that, they definitely never really argue. At most in the beginning Penny was just kind of oblivious/flippant because she’s socially awkward lol
who is the first to apologize?
both lmao
SEX.
who is on top? who is on bottom?
Felix is a little top  you cant convince me otherwise
any kinks?
not really
who has the strangest desires?
i think they’re mostly just cute in bed without anythnig crazy going on
who’s dominant in bed?
  FELIX!! in the cute ‘i got this’ kind of way. Penny’s shy so definitely not her.
is head ever in the equation?
duh
if so, who is better at performing it?
felix has the charisma but i think penny has the technique
ever had sex in public?
 they did almost fuck in nate’s library 
who moans the most?
Penny!  Felix thinks its cute
who leaves the most marks?
FELIX LOVES HICKIES. hes sad that they don’t last super long on him, but she tries anyway.
who is the more experienced of the two?
I think they’re pretty even actually
do they ‘fuck’ or ‘make love’?
latter
how long do they usually last?
im sure it varies
rough or soft?
soft!!
is protection used?
YES. penny is ON that shit. Though she wouldn’t be against having kids one day.
does it ever get boring?
nah they’re too cute and in gross cuddly love. Does felix look like he’d EVER get bored of the detective
where is the strangest place they’d have sex?
it didnt  happen but again, nates library. Penny was secretly kinda into it 
FAMILY.
do they plan on having children / do they have children?
 I don’t think either are seriously considering it for a while but Penny is a good 50/50 on it!
if so, how many children do they want/have?
just one, maybe two.
AFFECTION.
who likes to cuddle?
Felix! Penny’s a little more standoffish in general with physical affection, but she does love cuddling Felix. If he wants to cuddle she’s p much always down for it.
who gets naughty in the most inappropriate of places?
Felix. Have you heard what that boy says
who struggles to keep their hands to themself?
Felix! Though only in private. He know’s Penny’s shy and its cute to do it when shes working or something. He likes playfully distracting her.
how long can they cuddle until one becomes uncomfortable?
Probably for a good while, though Penny has a tendency to get antsy. Usually it just means her getting up and him happily following after her though
what is their favourite non-sexual activity?
video games! She showed him Animal Crossing and it was over
where is their favourite place to cuddle?
on the couch!
SLEEPING.
who snores?
Penny...
if both do, who snores the loudest?
Not loudly , but again penny.
do they share a bed or sleep separately?
they share a bed!
if they sleep together, do they cozy up together or lay far apart?
depends!
what do they wear to bed?
Penny wears pj shorts and a cotton shirt, pretty simple. Felix is probs similar
are either of them insomniacs?
Penny DEFINITELY is. Thankfully Felix doesn’t sleep a lot so she’s rarely disturbing him!
can sleeping pills be found by the bedside?
YEP. Especially after book 1, she started having nightmares.
do they wrap their limbs around each other or just lay side by side?
Felix is a koala.
who wakes up with bed hair?
Penny. Felix somehow always looks fucking perfect and she’d be jealous if she didn’t think it was so charming.
who wakes up first?
Penny. Even if Felix is just lazing about, she’s one of those responsible people or something.
who prepares breakfast in bed for the other?
Felix tried. keyword being tried. 
what is their favourite sleeping position?
Penny sleeps on her side and Felix clambers around either with one leg over her or spooning her usually.
do they set an alarm each night?
Penny does!
who has nightmares?
Both :(. Hard to tell with Felix how often for him
can a television be found in their bedroom?
Penny doesn’t have a TV
who has ridiculous dreams?
Felix for sure. Sometimes involving stuff pertaining to the Echo World and Penny is like ??? and he doesn’t know how to explain it.
who sprawls out and takes up most of the bed?
Felix
who makes the bed?
Felix, because he insists. Penny goes back and straightens it out
what time is bed time?
 bed by 1
any routines/rituals before bed?
felix insists on brushing their teeth together bc he thinks its cute (penny does too). its how she first actually got a glimpse of his fangs
who’s the grumpiest when they wake up?
neither! though felix DOES complain.
WORK.
who is the busiest?
penny. felix is  busy keeping himself from dying of boredom
who rakes in the highest income?
n/a
are any of them unemployed?
n/a
who takes the most sick days?
Penny, though very rarely. She usually saves them for days where she wants to work from home because the office got too overwhelming.
what are their jobs?
Vampire Agent vs Police Detective
who sucks up to their boss?
 Felix tries to charm Rebecca. Rebecca just sighs.
who is more likely to turn up late to work?
Felix. Got distracted
who stresses the most?
PENNY. though she usually takes things in stride, she’s a little up tight.
do they enjoy or despise their careers/occupations?
Penny is fine with being a detective and doubly fine with being an agent.
are they financially stable?
yeah!
HOME.
who does the washing?
Penny. We know what Felix’s stance is on laundry considering he hides his socks in Mason’s hamper.
who takes out the trash?
Felix , and he acts like a hero
who does the ironing?
Penny! She wears nice clothes that definitely would require ironing. 
who does the cooking?
Penny is a serviceable cook, though she tends to cook the same things. And sometimes still eats like a (healthier) college student because she doesn’t have the energy. Felix LOVES using it as an excuse to order food.
who is more likely to burn the house down just trying?
Felix.
who is messier?
Felix. More just disorganized
who leaves their dirty clothes on the floor?
Felix. Again, boy clearly hates laundry
who loses the car keys when it comes time to go somewhere?
Neither. Unless Felix yoinked the keys - then they could be anywhere.
who answers the telephone?
FELIX. First ring, always. 
who mows the lawn?
city slickers for life so neither
who does the vacuuming?
both. felix likes doing it and danciing
who does the groceries?
Penny because felix will bring back a bunch of things they didnt need
who takes the longest to shower?
Penny. She uses so much water
who spends the most time in the bathroom?
neither!
MISCELLANEOUS.
is money a problem?
nah theyre secret agents
how many cars do they own?
just penny’s little clunker
what’s their song?
waterfalls coming out your mouth // violet hour (especially this one) // sugar
do they live in the city or in the country?
small town
do they own their home or do they rent?
penny’s renting but wouldn’t be against owning a little flat somewhere
do they enjoy their surroundings?
wayhaven is home and comfortable for penny! she was actually falling out of love for it before she got promoted, now she feels protective over it and the supernaturals shes now aware live there.
what do they do when they’re away from each other?
felix goes insane waiting until they can meet up again. penny is often thinking abt him but is eager to get work done so she can do it even sooner
where did they first meet?
abandoned warehouse in book one - though the first meeting SHE remembers is him kissing her on the hand... romance...
who spends the most money when out shopping?
i feel they both are pretty similar! Theyre Fashionable, though Pennys really good at budgeting.
who’s more likely to flash their assets?
listen it doesnt happen in canon but if you do the combat training route with felix he fucking puts your hands up his shirt
any mental issues?
penny has anxiety and has been diagnosed as autistic since she was, like, 12. felix clearly has some shit he’s not letting himself fully mourn but OKAY BUDDY
who finds it amusing when the other trips over? 
penny laughs when felix trips just because he’s like a beautiful ragdoll and always ‘saves’ himself in really funny ways. felix is such a prince charming i think he’d see her tripping more as an excuse to be dashing and handsome at her and save her from face planting than laugh. 
who’s terrified of bugs?
penny definitely isn’t. could see felix losing his shit over a spider.
who kills the spiders around the house?
PENNY. doesn’t kill them though.
do they have any fears for their future?
Penny’s worried that loved ones might get put into danger due to ... everything. Verda found out about vampires and wasn’t hyped, so she’s worried about their friendship and his saftey most of all. She’s also worried about making ‘tough’ choices like the one at the end of book 2. It’s not a pleasant dilemma.
their favourite place?
Penny’s apartment!
who’s more likely to surprise the other with a fancy dinner?
felix FOR SURE
who pays the bills?
both, but penny set it all up on autopay bc felix would forget.
who’s the tallest?
Felix! He’s like what, 5′7-5′9? penny’s 5′3.
who’s more likely to just randomly hop into the shower with the other?
Both! Penny’s shy when doing it but she loves felix’s reaction because he’s always super excited.
who wanders around in their underwear?
neither
who sings the loudest when singing along to the radio?
felix. duh
what do they tease each other about?
everything! penny teases felix over how energetic and goofy and ~suave~ he is. He teases penny over being bashful - but she actually teases him more! He teases her over ROMANTIC stuff.
who is more likely to cringe at the other’s fashion sense at times?
Penny. The waistcoat, Felix. Why. No
who crushed first?
FELIX DIDDDDDDD. Penny got flustered but is very :/ at relationships bc she struggles socially and the only serious relationship she had prior was fucking BOBBY. So she straight up doesn’t trust that felix is being genuine at first. Also she’s a lil bit oblivious.
any alcohol or substance related problems?
nope!
who is more likely to stumble home, drunk, at 3am?
neither
who swears the most?
probably felix, though I don’t think he swears a lot either?
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draculaurennn · 4 years
Note
PRERELATIONSHIP -Liona General – Cullida Love – McJunk Domestic Life - Fuujiro
S— SHIP QUESTIONS @silverblighted
PRE-RELATIONSHIP — Liona .
How did they first meet? Siona was locked in a crumbling temple under the deserts sands and best girl Nova found her! And then Link and Gan cornered them like 10 minutes after they escaped.
What was their first impression of each other? For like 5 min Link thought she was actually tricking them that she wasn’t an evil mage, and then she passed out, and he was like “ok maybe not.” Siona’s first impression was like 2 hours later when she woke back up and she thought he was really nice!
Did any of their friends or family want them to get together? Link’s fam really did not! But Siona’s only family is Nova and she did. 
Who felt romantic feelings first? Uhhhh... I think technically Siona did, but only because she thought meeting a prince like that is really romantic and was probably just projecting that ideal on him a little bit. But either way they’re both idiots smitten within 24 hours so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Did either of them try to resist their feelings? Siona does, a few times. She does because she has to go home, she does because she thinks she has to return to the Twilight Realm alone, and she does because she doesn’t think the way her story is playing out that she’ll be allowed to stay with Link. I think Link probably did for like one week and then decided it’s not worth it to try resisting people you care deeply about. 
If you had told one of them that the other would be their soulmate, what would they think? asdfghjhgfd this one’s so hard UHHHHHH i think Link would think that’s pretty fuckin swell and makes sense if it goes hand in hand with finding a lost princess in the desert, and i think Siona would say that’s not a thing but she’d be super jazzed bc she’s an idiot romantic too. 
GENERAL — Cullida .
Who initiated the relationship, and how did it go? It’d ultimately be left up to Cullen, I think. I think Cressida wouldn’t have been afraid to tell him she was waiting on him to tell her when he was ready, but I don’t think she would have ever pushed it after that. So it was probably Cullen, and it was probably right after her dumb ass almost died after Haven. Went great, though, even if she was groggy and turned around. Cressida would have probably told him it was about time LOL
Did they have an official first date? If so, what was it like? As official as you can get when you’re in the Inquisition, I guess. I don’t even know if they count things as dates? Just nice outings with each other away from their jobs and duties. More than likely it was a nice trip to a lake to sit and chat and have a picnic and not worry about busy places and other people. 
What was their first kiss like? Their technical first kiss is in the alternate reality nightmare with Dorian, and Cressida tried kissing a red lyrium-corrupted Cullen to get through to him. For her, that was a first, but it was awful, and not even in their reality, so it doesnt really count. Their actual first kiss was in Haven right before she ran off to help Vesta, bc I think they were both pretty sure they were just doing to die there LOL. 
Were they each other’s first anything (kiss, relationship, etc.)? Cressida is Cullen’s first-pretty-much-everything. I guess technically Cullen is Cressida’s first (and only) husband, which she’s pretty glad about. 
What’s their height difference? Age difference? Cullen’s about a foot taller than Cressida, and nine years her senior. 
What’s their relationship with each other’s families? Cressida’s family is... almost totally horrible. Her dad is dead, so no relation for Cullen there, and her mother is a monster of a woman who abused the hell out of her sister. Vesta is awkward with Cullen but I think she’s grown to like him over time. (Not enough to tell him, but enough to be supportive I think LOL). They’re cordial enough and can be in a room alone, even if they don’t talk a lot.  Cullen’s family is so many sisters and a brother, and they all love Cressida. Cressida was panicked to meet them; she doesn’t panic meeting anyone, but she was really worried they wouldn’t like her bc she doesn’t think she, as a genuine person, is a likable person. She was also worried they’d think she was too pompous and shallow because she just doesn’t do field work. But they really like her bc she’s earnest and forthright and tries, even if she’s awful at menial field tasks. And they joke she’s too pretty for Cullen, so that’s always a plus. 
Who takes the lead in social situations? Cressida. Hands down. It’s what she’s good at, it’s what she lives for, and it probably annoys some people that she has to open her mouth, but she commands a situation very well and in her mind, that’s how it should be. Cullen’s p fine w that though bc he doesn’t love social situations and he’d rather do his own job and be left alone.
Who gets jealous easier? Uhhh, probably Cullen. Cress doesn’t make that easy for him bc she’s flirty and commanding and winds people around her fingers to get her way. I think there’s been a few times early on where he wasn’t even sure she genuinely liked him or not bc she can pay fake attention and admiration so convincingly even to people she doesn’t like. Cressida’s also... like, so obnoxiously confident in her own outward personality but also so incredibly convinced by how much Cullen loves her (once she knows) that I don’t think she ever worries about him vying after someone else. (Although, she did get pretty upset and tilted with the Warden Surana hanging around since she knows about that LMAO.) 
LOVE — McJunk .
Who said “I love you” first? Jesse. He said it a few times. Jun-ki’s kinda mean, though; I’m pretty sure she told him no he doesn’t a few times? Idk, he’s too nice for this bitch.
What are their primary love languages? Jesse’s is pet names and touch both. He’s not really shy so he can express it in a lot of ways. Jun’s is small gestures, like sitting with someone while they’re struggling. I guess her other one is also literally fighting people for him even tho he definitely probably did not ask LOL. 
How often do they cuddle/engage in PDA? All the time. All the fucking time. Their coworkers hate them. Think April and Andy, and then multiply. (And Jun literally would spit her gum in this man’s mouth just to annoy other people.) 
What are their favorite things to do together? They do... so much together uhhhh sdfghj idk, I know Jun likes doing most things with Jesse around now. Movie nights, pizza dates, annoying PDA, drinking games, weird places to fuck... they’re a little inseparable. I think the only thing Jun doesn’t like to do with Jesse around is upgrade sessions with Angela because she doesn’t want to be seen all broken up, and training segments because she doesn’t want to be responsible for him getting hurt. 
Who’s better at comforting the other? Jesse. Jun’s never been good at it. He says what he thinks she needs to hear without impressing on her a bunch of psychology she never said she had. He’s just good at offering her something to relate to and a shoulder to lean on. Jun’s not very good with words, though, so she’s not very good at or sure how to offer comfort when someone needs it, especially Jesse. But she just says she’ll hang around and if they fight about it she just says to shut up and deal with it. He’s usually better once he vents.
Who’s more protective? BIG DEBATABLE. I think it’s pretty... even. I think either of them will fight as hard as they can for the other, though I think Jun may be the only one more likely to throw herself into actual harm’s way, and that’s just because she’s definitely the more reckless of the two. 
Do they prefer verbal or physical affection? Jesse’s a more verbal person but I think physical affection and affirmation is where they’ve connected. No one has to say anything, he just does, but it’s just the cherry to the rest of it and physical communication and affection is more than enough for both of them. 
What are some songs that apply to their relationship, in-universe or otherwise? THERE”S A WHOLE BUNCH ON THE SPOTIFY LET ME TELL UUUUU BUT THE BEST ARE OFF THE TOP OF MY HEAD “Something About Us” by Daft Punk “Amphetamine” by MNQN and also I could add matchbox 20 but i’m not tryna get roasted
What kind of nicknames do they call each other? Yikes. Uhhhhh, Jesse’s partial to: darlin’, sweetie, sweet pea, sweet bean, juniper berry, junnie b jones, jun-bug, and the list goes onnn.  Jun’s partial to cowboy and (affectionately) dumbass. 
DOMESTIC LIFE — Fuujiro .
If they get married, who proposes? Probably Shinjiro, and it was probably something stupid and weird at the grocery store. 
What’s the wedding like? Who attends? Small, probably at a park or something, but all of their friends. They don’t have a lot, but that’s what makes it nice. I think they’d be more interested in spending money on travelling afterwards than trying to make a big deal out of a celebration.
How many kids do they have, if any? What are they like? I don’t think they have any kids. I don’t think Fuu has any interest in bringing a kid into the world bc of the shit she’s gone through on her end; there’s no innate part of her that thinks she needs to have a kid to raise them better just to make up for how alone and neglected she was as a child. If they wound up with any kids, it’d probably be some circumstantial adoption of a wayward orphan they kept coming, honestly? A mentorship or personal attachment just kind of developing, really. Like Denzel LMAO. That’s the only thing I could see happening really asdfgh.
Do they have any pets? THEY HAVE KOROMARU. Otherwise, I think they just put food and shelter boxes out for their neighbourhood cats. Shinjiro probably lets them in a lot. 
Who’s the stricter parent? Shinjiro, hands down. He was the stricter parent when he was a teenager. Fuu is/ would be the parent who is also being scolded.
Who kills the bugs in the house? Shinjiro kills them and Fuu takes them outside. Shinjiro just doesn’t think bugs belong in the house, and Fuu thinks killing them is bad luck. If he kills them before she gets to take them outside, they probably “fight” about it, but it’s not a divisive convo that’ll sour the day.  
How do they celebrate holidays? Shinjiro’s not really a holiday person and Fuu’s really busy, but I know she thinks they’re worth doing. So everything’s probably pretty quiet and half-decourated for. Holidays with events to go to that they don’t have to prepare for, like festivals, Fuu definitely nags to attend. Things like Christmas, I think they just plan on nice dinners and quiet evenings. 
Who’s more likely to convince the other to come back to sleep in the morning? Ooh, uhhhhh asdfg that’s hard. Probably Shinjiro? I don’t think he tries often, but he is the one more likely to sleep late. I guess it’d be circumstantial, in a lot of ways. Like if he wasn’t sleeping a lot lately, Fuu would sleep late to try and keep him around. If Fuu’s overworking, Shinjiro would try to bait her back. But otherwise, it’s probably Shinjiro, since she’s usually up early because she wants to run early.
Who’s the better cook? Shinjiro, hands down. Fuu’s okay at it; if she has to make dinner, she’s happy to do it and it’d be fine food, it just wouldn’t be anything exciting or special. She understands basic seasoning laws and how to use a rice cooker. Shinjiro’s the one who’s anal-retentive about produce quality, technique, prepwork, etc. He’s the one who literally watches home cooking network and considers buying a separate pasta cooker, after all. It’s one of the few things he’s really passionate about, and he’s always emphasized how important a good meal and diet are to health with the idiots he hangs around. 
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hey-hamlet · 5 years
Text
BNHA AU Ideas: Zookeeper’s Son
Also on AO3!
TL;DR: 
An iconic personality in the animal conservation scene has a popular zoo that people flock to from all over the world. But this isn't about him, it's about his son. And his son's massive crush. (Cheesy ShinDeku Crush) 
steve irwin inspired au, aka if you didnt know hamlet was australian, you do now
Ok but All Might is basically Steve Irwin in this au, Izuku is a huuuuuge animal fan
Allmight is Izuku’s dad and Inko is his wife and izu hung around animals loads when he was young, 1A are the zoo volunteers
is he like, steve irwin with crocodiles? or something like big cats or wolves. Honestly let's just stick with crocodiles
aizawa is the sleepy big cat handler
mic yells with the birds, mostly his job is actually the PA system but he teaches the birds to talk during his lunch hour, And he runs birds of prey shows
Shinsou comes to the zoo a lot cause he likes watching the tigers and their babies. shinsou giving a bottle of milk to a baby tiger because aizawa needed an extra pair of hands and our boy is crying actual tears because its So Cute
Todoroki was never allowed pets or to go outside much because he has to be a respectable rich boi tm, but he's always loved watching all mights ridiculous nature shows
w a  it
this means
,,,
allmight dies. Damn ok I guess this is getting sad now.
Todoroki goes to the zoo for the first time ever and sees a mural to Allmight and just starts crying
so aizawa has been working at the zoo since izuku was born and was honestly his babysitter a lot with mic and tensei because tensei, the onsite vet, had a little brother the same age. and when the news came in? aizawa's heart sank because this little 6-year-old ball of sunshine didn't have a dad anymore
inko is the badass but soft mum but shes not at home, shes actually on a shoot at the time
izuku is running around the zoo and aizawa just scoops him up and gets him icecream because the kid doesn't know yet and he wants izuku to have 5 more minutes before his world collapses. aizawa lets out a single sob because izuku picked the allmight themed icecream thanks
Aizawa helps Inko around the house as much as possible and drives Izu to school when Inko is having a rough day
All mights animals being depressed cause he's gone and blessed 6-year-old Izu sneaking into a fucking lion enclosure because 'dad would want to cheer them up'
there was a lion cub litter born really close to izuku and allmight dotted on these cubs because he was all soft because his wife was pregnant, there are photos of toddler izuku with these lions. izuku burying his face into one of their manes and crying while the lions lay around him
Aizawa has been interning at the zoo since he was 15 and is 22 when allmight dies. its his first year really "working" there because he just finished uni and hes on fulltime
aizawa thought allmight was going to be kinda snobby but allmight said hi to him every day, remembered his name and attended his uni graduation, told him he was proud and told him he'd never seen anyone as good with the cats as he was
aizawa babysat his kid, saw this man almost every day since he was 15
Ok but what if Inko wakes up in the middle of the night hearing All mights voice. She's freaking out, but then finds Izu rewatching old footage of his dad. Crying but also using them to learn how to be as good with the animals as him
animals a d o r e izuku, all of them
like, even the crows at the park will sit on his shoulders and give him little shiny things the wolves like to lick him and crowd him when he walks in, the crocodiles like head scratches
allmight was so proud of his son, because even he couldnt get animals to like him instinctually
1A are all the little highschool interns
Shinsou crushes on the cute zookeeper boy and Izu gets him an internship eventually, he just sees izuku hugging a lion and falls in love instantly
aizawa is his uncle and is complaining about this "kid that doesnt listen to safety protocol" and shinso is like ",, h im"
Aizawa thought that shinsou hated outdoors and animals, but is confused when suddenly Shinsou starts going to the zoo after school everyday
the way this family works
aizawa was a foster kid bc his family wasnt trusted with him but he still had contact, shinso's family was falling apart and aizawa didnt want his cousin to go through the same thing so he takes shinsou in age 10
they say uncle bc aizawa is so much older than shinsou
izuku like, doesn't tell shinso hes allmights kid and izuku wears a facemask and dyes his hair all the time so its fair that shinso doesnt guess
so izuku is on messenger and tells shinso to open his window izuku is sitting on his balcony. hes got a torch in his mouth and a swipecard in the other. he just kinda, grabs shinso and hauls him over the balcony. shinso is in pyjamas and all he has is a phone
izuku grabs his hand and they run down the street and shinso is just??? so lost. aizawa lives su p er close to the zoo and they get to the gate and shinso is like?? why are we here its midnight
and izuku o p e n s th e g a t e
shinso is crying bc he has every reason to think he'll go to jail
(izuku turned off the alarms and warned his mum he was doing this but didnt warn shinso because thats not fun)
so izuku takes shinso to the farmyard, wakes up the horse, which is his horse, a pulls shinso up on it too the horse has little lights on it
so its midnight and shinso is hugging izuku on this horse because its cold and hes in pyjama's and hes cold and its dark and he doesnt wanna fall off this massive horse
so izuku takes him around the zoo at night on this horse and its honestly great? bc loads of the animals are awake and the zoo is empty. izuku whispers that hes not really supposed to do this but hes going to do it anyway and shinso is like??? please dont im too young for jail
but izuku just giggles
izuku lets them into the back deer enclosure and its m a s s i v e
so its 2am by now, all the deer are awake so izuku ties up the horse and leads shinso over to his fave deer
"ok so, dad used to do this to me when i was litte, but i figure youre still light enough”
and izuku just hefts shinso onto this deer. shinso is laughing and clinging to this deer for his life and so izuku gets on another and they run around the paddock
shinso is yelling and cheering as izuku laughs, the other deer are running beside them because deer do that and its honestly the coolest thing that shinso has ever done
4am and the deer have all fallen back asleep and shinso and izuku are on the roof of the vet clinic because the vet-clinic is still heated at night so the roof is warm and they kinda,, fall asleep on the roof. izuku wakes up at 6, but doesnt wake shinso up for 20 minutes because hes smiling even in his sleep
they have to sprint back to shinso's house
izuku helps shinso climb back up his balcony and waves goodbye and shinso just watches him run back to the zoo and hes blushing and messy and cold but hes just so happy
aizawa walks into his room a minute later and asks shinso if he slept outside for some ungodly reason because his lips are blue and there are leaves in his hair
izuku doesnt like people knowing hes allmights kid when hes just out and about or working or honestly doing anything that isnt a show or interview so the only people that know are tenya, bakugo, tensei, mic and aizawa
Every year at the anniversary of all mights death they all bring Izu and Inko to his shrine and thousands of people come from all around to pay their respects and Shinsou finds a crying Izu after and takes him back to the zoo after hours so Izu can be with the animals
shinso still doesnt know izuku is allmights kid and izuku just sobbing and shinso doesnt know what happened
izuku just talks about his dad vaguely, shinso knows aizawa used to babysit izuku too
aizawa makes a tradition of getting icecream for izuku on the date every year, they both get the allmight themed one
bakugo isnt a massive dick in this au but hes still not a soft friend. he will roast you every 24 seconds but the 2 weeks around allmights death? he looks out for izuku, makes extra sure no one works out izuku from school is "allmights son" izuku, makes sure he eats lunch, helps inko make dinner
bakugo threatens to rip off shinso's dick and shove it down his throat and shinsou is like???? WHat dID i DO???
Izu is being bullied for crying in school around the date, Bakugo fIGHTS
bakugo gets suspended for a day and aizawa picks him up bc his parents are busy. bakugo looks angry but also kinda, embarrassed for being caught and for getting that mad. aizawa just parks on the side of the road just out of school and lets out a massive sigh
"you shouldn't have done that-"
"You dont think i fucking know that??"
"shut up and listen kid. you shouldn't have done that. and im not giving you a pat on the head for breaking the rules like that. but you did a good thing. hes got enough on his plate. youre a good friend"
aizawa lets bakugo stay at his place so mitsuki doesn't have to find out bakugo got suspended, izuku takes bakugo to pat the wolves as a "thank you for throwing down for me" present
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fuck-customers · 5 years
Text
My store is a dumpster fire waiting to explode
So this story has been one that has been slowly building over the sevenish months that I have been there, so this is going to be a very very long one, I apologize in advance. TLDR at the bottom.
I'm writing this cause I saw a recent submission about a p**s****, and just... need to get this off my chest. 
So we opened this store late last year, and I was absolutely ecstatic at the time. The job had gotten me out of 45+ hours food service job which had left me emotionally, physically, and mentally exhausted, and it was working with pets, so obviously it has to be great right? Well not so much.
It started out okay, I liked the people I worked with, but from the start we had issues. It was clear that there was (and is to this day) a breakdown in communication between managers and the different shifts. The people who trained me (as a shift leader who has the authority to open or close the store) were from outside, and apparently didnt do a very good or thorough job. For months after that the manager or assistant manager would say that I was doing something wrong, or forgetting to do something which I had never been shown or even told to do at all. Has this gotten better in the last seven months? No, it has not. In fact I am still not fully trained for the position I am supposed to be in, and was barely half trained for most of it. But I wasnt even the worst off, because the assistant manager at the time, N, wasnt fully trained either. 
Now that might not be a big problem during the first few months, everything is still shaking down and people are getting settled, right? Well turns, out corporate needs our store manager, Ill call her R, to manage TWO STORES, at the same time. 2 hours apart from each other. So store manager splits her time between my store, and the store two hours away which ends up in a four hour commute for her because --  guess what-- they dont even pay her for a hotel. So now the store is managed by the not fully trained assistant manager.
During those few months where R was gone, I had a rough time. Money was missing several times from drawers or safe, things weren't getting done the way they were supposed to, daily paperwork wasnt signed, and R blamed me and the other shift leader,  A, for not doing things the way they were supposed to be done. Except we were never originally told how things were supposed to be done.
Well R finally hires a manager for the other store she was helping to manage and comes back to discover that the store is in chaos. On the outside everything looked fine, but all that paperwork that hadnt been done correctly? It had built up to months worth of issues that needed to be corrected, and she was behind on everything. 
Around that time she finally realizes that the problems we were having werent my or A's fault. It was the assistant manager N. Turns out, she would show up for work and just sit and do NOTHING. Basically expecting the closing people, aka me and A, to do everything that needed to be done. And the stuff that apparently only she knew how to do (because she hadnt trained me or A even though it was also something we were supposed to be doing), was getting delayed by several days. All while she left exactly when her shift was up, got there late in the mornings, and generally was just sketchy about work over all. A and I believe that that money that went missing several times was her doing as well, because after she left, it magically stopped happening.
But since R and N were friends, there was no consequence. In the end, me and A basically had to make up for all the missed work on N's side, because R refused to fire her. She wrote her up a few times, had some "discussions," but eventually N left on her own. It came out after she left that N was a compulsive liar, who had told lies to just about everyone at the store, from tiny ones to massive ones. 
So now the store had lost the (half-trained) assistant manager, and we still had to fix all of her messes. So R decides to promote A (which is good, A is a great worker and more experienced than I am) to assistant manager. At this point I was hopeful that everything would calm down and start to settle.
Surprise. That didnt happen.
Instead our store manager got PROMOTED, to a sort of district manager. So then she was only going to be at our store for TWO DAYS of the entire week. She had just made A assistant manager, so she had barely any training, even though they did some speed training for a week or two.
At this point I still wasnt even trained to take in shipments, meaning the only two people in the entire store who could process incoming freight were R and A, even though we get daily shipments. We were still trying to fix the issues and things left behind by N. It was an absolute nightmare. 
But it still gets worse. Because thats when we learned that one of our associates was leaving at the end of the month. I dont begrudge her for it, but it put a squeeze on everyone. Because despite common sense where if you lose someone you hire someone new to replace them, that didnt happen. We started with about 7 total workers, four of which were management, three of which were cashiers. We had lost one of the cashiers early on, N was gone, and R was there two days a week (most of which was her panicking about paperwork and store stuff), and we were about to lose another cashier. But still R hadnt hired anyone new. And after the one cashier left, our last remaining cashier let us know she would be leaving as well.
Of course, R panics. At that point she was down to four workers, including herself, and one of them about to leave. She finally starts the hiring procedures, but because she is so busy, it takes her WEEKS to hire anyone.
For about a month, it was basically me and A running the store. they scheduled me at 39 hours (so they wouldnt have to pay me for full time), and expected me to cover any shifts people called out, or come in early, or stay late. I was (and currently still am) the only shift leader for the store. And I am STILL not fully trained. 
About two weeks ago, R finally hires some people. One of them literally quits after two days, and then she suddenly starts hiring a bunch of people. So now we have four new people we have to train, one of which they decided after a week would be a shift leader. But because she hired all of these new people at once, she's cutting my hours to 20 hours or less. So after all my hard work, after all my sticking through, I havent gotten a raise, and instead my hours have been drastically cut, and it doesnt look like R has learned anything at all. 
I dont even think I would realize how bad it is, if it werent for the fact that R has had to beg help from other stores. And those from the other stores, would ask me questions about the store, about things that needed to be done which I couldnt answer. They looked at me in complete surprise and befuddlement, because it was simple things, basic things which I should know. But dont. 
There is honestly, so much more that I cant even begin to start going through because its such a f***** mess. I was trained how to open the store over the phone, and trained on things at most once or twice with supervision before sent off to figure it out alone.  I still have questions because I havent been fully trained after SEVEN MONTHS. I've been scheduled outside of my availability multiple times, and have covered all but two shifts I have been asked to cover, even though the ONE day I asked if someone could cover me cause I was so sick I could barely talk no one took my shift. There is so much confusion because there is no communication between shifts, I walk in after a few days completely unaware of whats happening or needs to be done. I dislike calling R whenever there are issues because she always snaps when she answers the phone and tries to get off as soon as possible and I feel like Im an inconvenience. 
So yeah, Im done. I have been for months but Ive been trying to stick it out as long as I could. But Ive put in my notice, and Im hoping to find something better. At least now I know what red flags to look for.
TLDR: Corporate keeps putting way too much on store manager, it trickles down to literally everyone and everything in the store, no one can fix it and now all but one person who opened the store are leaving.
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cleaduvalls · 5 years
Text
i watched “spy kids 3″ twice in one week and back-to-back throughout my childhood and here are my thoughts
whos gonna use 3d effects at home
up your prices
JUNI NO YOUR H A I R
hahah funney cuz he stepped in gum
its so quiet my volumes at 44 and its too quiet
the music sounds a little like isle of dreams from the last one
oh hes wearing the necklace!!
fun fact i hadnt seen any of rocky until freshman year and when i did i didnt know where i had seen that guy before. turns out hes the toymaker
juni dont ever step out of line for ANYTHING
buscemi!!!!
spider dude!!!!
ralph!!!!!
gerti!!!
whats up with the fancy pot. i hate it. doesnt match the aesthetic
if you havent seen her since christmas “last year” then that means you havent seen her in over a year. someone would have gone for her by now
shes NINE???????
“everyones your family” yeah no i dont want “everyone” in my family
“retired” youre ELEVEN
what was with that zoom in
“games and theory” dont you mean GAME THEORY
that dude looks like colonel sanders
ew its donnagon
oh shit mrs giggles is cute
v boxx???? ew
and i OOP-
i just realized theres been an “are you with me” type thing in each movie so far
why are there only five levels????? logically there would be one tutorial level, so you only get 4 levels to play on
he go ZOOM
looks like jumpstart
or reader rabbit
he can still use telepathy????
why is he carrying the coins???????? 
this guy looks like antman
he looks nothing like a toad
wait thats the floating head from sharkboy and lavagirl. tobias i think???????
so its hardcore mode????? just make a new account
they only added that for more 3d effects didnt they
this is just target smash from smash bros
the dark side of the moon doesnt exist stupid
youre TESTERS why are you trying to WIN
“knows karate”
when i was younger i was so confused why the time went down but now i realize that they actually had to GET grandpa
yeah well he DID deal with it
iron man? dont you mean valentin avellan?
i paused the movie for like 20 minutes to find my old spy kids 3d glasses and couldnt and now im sad
the dude in silver looks like this guy i know
juni is bumblebee
p r e d d y
he escaped by winning. if demetras so good, why is she still here???
WHY DOES HER MECH HAVE TIDDIES
“no ear biting” isnt that mike tyson
wait is the platform gyroscopic or not????? it is in some instances but not in others????
great job juni you killed her
i like the hippie one hes cool
nevermind hes lame
i like the killer guy now. chaotic evil
i think they legit used daryl sabara for the poster
i feel like i had junis car as a taco bell toy but it was blue
why would you listen to him
actually it IS a turbo boost it just turbo boosts you out of the car
wOah
oh no he died
why is grandpa so cool
according to my physics teacher that shouldnt work
why is antman helping you
these bikes shouldnt be working either
why would you have to lose a life to continue the race??? the fall is clearly implemented so why does juni lose a life???
why is there a COUNTDOWN
was there a time limit on the race??? i didnt pay attention
who are the dudes in the background
i never got the “atari-sega-nendo” joke until this week. i was a loser child
even if you dont shut it down before people get online its still gonna take them a bit to get to level 5, you have buffer time
“my cool” THATS👏NOT👏A👏SKILL👏
juni theyre already gone
wait thats illegal
“lava mountain” you mean a volcano??????
hahah l0zerz
awwwwwwwww
they stole tetris
oh my God its lego star wars
wait there are TWO characters in yellow suits you cant DO THAT
oh no she died
THERES THE ICONIC LINE
“dont fall in love with a game juni” WHAT ABOUT MINECRAFT
holy crap i thought that was loss for a second
“my feet stink” THATS A REFERENCE TO THE LAST ONE!!!!!
carmen!!!!
great job juni
because lava is COOL
the floor looks like 25 pounds of meth disguised as ancient aztec calendars
i was so confused as a kid because i had actual tinker toys and these weren’t it
i alwasy wanted to be the guys in the cells
i thought they couldnt help juni anymore????? why can they manipulate the game NOW
oh no have all died
nevermind
why are you always conspiring against juni???
haha gameboy
so apparently thats elijah wood??? dont know who that is but he looks like a rat
wow. inspirational.
is the guy like??????? really tall or something?????
oops
aww :((
what kind of advanced AI is this???? developing feelings???
yes you can youre literally just code
awwwwww
you may not be smart but you have g r e a t fashion sense
its called virtual reality look it up
i love this part because hes working so hard but then his kids are calling so he just… goes
also why did they reapprove this program
WHAT ABOUT YOUR CHILDREN THEYRE PRETTY IMPORTANT
you dont have to BREAK IT you could just LEAVE
SEE YOU A R E THEIR UNCLE
nice hair ingrid
machete!!!!
F L O O P!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOVE👏THAT👏DUDE👏
and minion i guess
oh!!!!! floops wearing the good coat!!!!!!! he better run!!!!!
SOMEBODY RING THE DINKSTER??????
romero!
didnt you specifically say “im no loon” in the second one????
whats with the fist bump sound effect
hmm i wonder who
he go ZOOM
you can still????? go to a wedding????? in a wheelchair???? like i can assure you thats a thing
also its canon that at this point that ingrid is less than 30. carmen is 14. that means ingrid was 16 when she had carmen, and we know she was married beforehand
the toymaker isnt allowed to be family yet
YES!!!!!!! FLOOP IS FAMILY!!!!!!!!! LOVE THAT DUDE!!!!!!!!
OH MY GOD THERE WERE NO SHIITAKE MUSHROOMS D:
OH!!!!!! INGRIDS FAMILY IS AVELLAN BECAUSE THE OTHER PRODUCERS LAST NAME IS AVELLAN!!!!!! nice
alexa vega went so hard for the song in this one i love it
wait now i have to review the fourth one oh NOOOOO
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Ok so I know some people in the fandom don't like talking about Magnus' past lovers because anyone that isn't Alec everyone just turns their heads but ok listen. Your last response about Magnus and queer history my head immediately went to Freddie Mercury and oh please I would like a little more insight on how they met and their relationship. The only thing we knew was that Magnus would go to his concerts and even drag his friends along. What I would give to learn more about them.
FUCK MY LIFE anon listen idk if you fully know what you're getting yourself into by asking me this because i am literally OBSESSED with Magnus' relationship with Queen and Freddie like im literally VIBRATING rn i was answering the questions in order but i just HAD to answer this one immediately because !!!!!!!!!!!!! fuck fuck fuck i love magnus' relationship with Freddie Mercury and Queen so much you dont understand, i have already made some posts and i still plan on making a playlist of Queen Songs That Remind Me Of Magnus but anyway hell yeah let's DO this
okay so first im gonna talk a little bit about how i view their relationship. now, they probably weren't in a very serious relationship, since theres this whole Magnus Locked His Heart Ever Since Camille thing, but Magnus and Freddie have SO much in common i cant really think this was just a fling, either. so here's what i think: magnus and freddie were good friends who sometimes hooked up and that definitely had chemistry to have something special, but it never happened because Magnus never fully allowed himself to give in to it and neither did Freddie - im assuming their relationship was in the 70s, since in the 80s Freddie met his husband, Jim Hutton, and at that time Freddie also had a hard time trusting and loving. also, Magnus was already in New York, so it couldn't have been too serious. but Magnus would go around to watch their concerts and every time he would find Freddie somehow (it wasnt that hard, really, you just had to go to the local queer scene) and they would sometimes hook up, sometimes just talk and enjoy each other's company, sometimes both. that's what i think it's most likely.
but the absolutely OFF THE CHARTS amount of vibing they must have done. i dont think you fully understand - unless you're a queenie trash bitch such as me - just how similar magnus and freddie are. here's a short, comprehensive list of Freddie Mercury Traits:
Freddie was seen and stereotyped as an overly sexual, lothario, diva and inconsequential kind of guy, and to some extent he put on this facade, but in reality he was extremely closed off and insecure and loving, and this was mostly a persona he put on to protect himself
Despite that whole persona, Freddie was an extremely compassionate guy who did everything he could to help others, particularly other queer people. His personal assistant, his chef, his chaffeur, all were other queer guys (sometimes his exes even) that had nowhere else to go and were in need of a job, and Freddie was just like "oh, would you look at that, you're hired now. I'm gonna pay you, hm, 3 million" it was so. When Jim lost his job Freddie hired him as a gardener. They literally met because they were talking in a club and Freddie was all like "lets all go to my house" and brought in a bunch of strangers to his home. That's the kind of guy he was. His house was always open as well
Freddie was loyal to a fault and a little bit too trusting, and was stabbed in the back a few times. The most well-known one is P*ul, who outed him against his will despite them having years of friendship, a blow that Freddie never fully recovered from, but there were others. Despite being a shy guy and reluctant to open up, he actually wore his heart on his sleeve and this sometimes ended up hurting him, a lot
Freddie felt absolutely lonely and like he was unworthy of being loved. This is not a secret, its a common theme in a lot of his songs, the most prominent of them being somebody to love. He wanted to be loved and taken care of but at the same time wouldnt allow himself
He was also very insecure. Jim says in his book that Freddie would frequently ask him, out of the blue, if he loved him, despite the fact that they were, you know, married (not in the paper, of course, but Jim bought him wedding rings and Freddie called him his husband, so i consider them married)
He was constantly scared of being an inconvenience. When he found out he had AIDS, his first instinct was to tell Jim that if jim wanted to leave him he would understand. Jim, of course, said that was bullshit and he wouldnt leave Freddie because of that
He was a perfectionist and always wanted to do his absolute best, nothing less. He was also a creative genius as we all know
He loved cats and would bring random cats into his home constantly
He loved fashion and pretty things
He was a queer, gnc man of color
He had a pretty protective side to him; queen's bassist, John Deacon, was extremely shy and said that Freddie pretty much shielded him from the press attention, and also helped him polish his song writing skills and always wanted him to do his best. After Freddie died, John quit the showbusiness.
I mean, remind you of someone? Holy fucking shit, i nearly lost my goddamn mind when they mentioned that he hooked up with Freddie, because they're so similar in their issues and insecurities and interests it's almost meta. I don't know if that was on purpose or not, but i thank the sh writers every day for that line tbh honestly i am so blessed
Unfortunately i think they might kind of be too similar - you get two very insecure, afraid to be hurt people who kind of have a persona together and it's kind of hard to have them have a meaningful relationship. But where Freddie was shy, Magnus was extroverted and easygoing, and there were always parties (something the both of them loved) and they had enough common interests to bond over. Also, they both couldnt help but wear their heart on their sleeves, even when they tried not to. And i mean, i am 100% sure that Magnus absolutely loved Queen, because 1- who doesnt? 2- the songs are so intense and heartfelt and beautiful and theatrical and that's right on magnus' alley; 3- the lyrics just speak to him, because there Freddie was, writing about wanting to be loved and fearing to open himself up, and there was also Brian writing all these songs about seeing your loved ones die, and Roger was a domestic abuse victim - there was just so much for him to relate too. So i can definitely see Freddie and Magnus staying up awake late at night, looking at the window and talking about themselves, their fears, the personas they have created and how hard it is to break out of them, when they were alone in a hotel room and everyone else who was at the party was gone. Just the two of them, having heart-to-hearts, then sleeping, but the next day the magic was gone and they were both back to guarding themselves - also, Magnus was avoiding getting involved with mundane men, if you go by my headcanon. so there was just too much holding them back
but it was still an important relationship that helped the both of them learn more about themselves and get a little more used to opening up and allowing themselves to talk about themselves. they didnt really break up as much as drift apart - Freddie had the band and Magnus was high warlock of Brooklyn and the political tensions in the downworlder community were high. But they both got their happy endings after all - Freddie met Jim and they were together until the end of his life, and Magnus met Alec, who will be with him for the rest of eternity too because i said so :) so its all good, in the end, and Freddie will always have a special place in magnus' heart, as both an amazing human being that he was honoured to meet and someone who was really, really important to magnus and that helped him become who he is today and be a little happier and more comfortable with himself
he still loves queen and listens to them constantly. sometimes its bittersweet to think about him, but most times its just good to hear these songs that mean so much to him and think of how far theyve both gone
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ayyponine · 5 years
Text
a few goldfinch thoughts
tom cable re: the cigarettes: “yeah my mom blew up over that too” like jesus CHRIST tom did you HAVE to phrase it like that??
when theo rlly talks to pippa fr the first time at her house and the heart guirland on her bedposts frames him like a halo
hobie.........everything abt hobie...... i love
we’re all adopting baby theo. we’re all adopting baby andy. we’re all adopting baby pippa and her post surgery undercut and her damaged little body falling asleep holding a medicine lollipop. we’re all adopting baby boris reacting to hearing the door slam and immediately shifting into protect friend and dog mode. we’re adopting all the babies right now no discussion
i love every single fucking thing about the pool scene it’s probably my favourite of the entire movie. the kids lying next to each other with their heads level and boris’ feet sticking out way further. theo’s secret abt the dreams of his mom. opening up and fucking crying because hes a child and has been through too much and the guilt is consuming him, all the time. boris proposing they swim bc he’s theos only semblance of a support system but hes an equally messed up child and sometimes it just be like that and there’s not much you can do. jumping in the pool. the footage reversal with the water closing over their heads to make the feeling of underwater suddenly disorienting as it triggers a reliving of the bombing. the muffled sound of being underwater/the muffled disembodied sound from waking up after being knocked out frm the blast into a hazy hellscape
i didnt rlly pay much notice to it i just sort of went in to Experience but i get the feeling both diegetic and non diegetic sound design was p fucking good btw? i mean the songs playing both in universe (eg on hobies radio as him and theo are in the workshop together) and tracks as part of the general mood setting sdtk for the audience but also. i get the feeling a lot of sound (eg scenes of theo on the street or @reeve wat the FUCK does that have to do with me?) was enhanced to be even more loud and jarring to reflect theo’s experience of them when he’s in a panicked& heightened state? then again i know i can be kinda sensitive to sound sometimes so idk if that’s like. edited w extra attention or just shit that stood out anyway idk. only afterward i realised i wanted to check if they’d worked in the tinnitus theo mentions popping up like a phantom experience whenever he feels stressed but i forgot to explicitly listen fr it so ill probs take a note of that on a rewatch but like even if they didnt do anything w that tiny detail. im no expert but still feel like the sound design is deserving of some recognition
popper did a great job and i love him
genuine tears when hobie lets theo stay fr as long as he likes, and he won’t get sent away. extremely good fucking shit, i die, im glad this was in the movie the way it was
platt hot
i genuinely thought we were never gonna see the mom’s face but when you do and then keep seeing it and get a sense of completion, things coming full circle and everything’s gonna be okay. god it hits me good. w the book you get the same wholesome feeling of shit being resolved twrds the end but again, to have that extremely good pool scene with theo’s confession abt the dreams and then in the end him finding peace with it and forgiving himself and then you see her face and relive the moments Before and it doesnt really hurt because he’s accepted the snippets of joy in all the pain im. really fucking tender. perfect use of the visual capabilities of yr medium thanks
i feel like the casting was fucking SPOT on btw not just re: kids vs older versions (though that was rlly appropriate still) but in every possible way thank you casting directors and actors great work all round folks
also let me say, moving back n forth in the narrative instead of keeping it chronological? god tier decision
my ONLY critique is that this movie couldve lasted fucking longer. i feel like it’s a perfect adaptation keeping true to the source material but do genuinely feel like the personal experience was enhanced by having read the book (eg the moment of theo getting hit by his dad. it’s jarring. it’s a shock. it’s hard fr actors to portray the subtle language of long term abuse so as an audience member you might think this is the first time this line has been crossed but if you’ve read theo’s thoughts the entire time before, directly leading up to and during this you know he had been expecting the jovial mask to fall off and when his trepidation twrds his fathers friendly attitude is proven valid.. a cold hard realisation confirming the truth theo’s been trying to navigate....... oof). not to be a “uhhh the thicc af book is better than the movie uhh you should read the book” pretentious snob bc it really is a solid adaptation and portrays the flow of events just right but also donnas writing is rully fucking good and shows a deeper subtlety you can’t really translate easily into a movie without reverting to a like straight up narration or smth ya feel. so i do still recommend the book first and foremost and then you can watch the movie with a full understanding
yes i do know this movie is two and a half hrs already i do not care i want it all
in other words i think i just want someone to sit me down and gently read this book to me accompanied with a slideshow of the movie. i want to experience the story in full through any type of media i can get it simultaneously and the movie i welcome with open arms
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write streddie being soft uwu
Stan: *is doing a puzzle like a quirky kid*
Richie: *is trying to help at said puzzle but failing*
Eddie: Richie you just took my piece!!
Richie: Well it was in the wrong spot!!
Stan: *doesnt pay attention bc P U Z Z L E Y U M Y U M*
Eddie: what do you mean?! It fit into the other ones!!!
Richie: No it didn’t!!
Stan: *almost finishes puzzle yum yum*
Eddie: DEAR LORD- IM SORRY STANLEY BUT THIS IDIOT DOESNT KNOW HOW PUZZLES WORK....but it looks very nice to *smiley boye and kisses his forehead*
Richie: *>:(* Edward bullies me
Stan: *finished puzzle :D* Look it’s done!!!
Eddie: awe that looks very nice Stanley!! And Richie you know I love you to death *kiss*
Richie: I feel unloved- let’s watch a movie, boyfriends
Stan: Can we watch a scary one?
Eddie: I swear you two hate me sometimes- *sits on the couch*
Stan: Nooooo *also sits on the couch* *cuddle part 1*
Richie: Eddie is literally a bully *sits next to edward* *leeches to boyfriends part 1 and 2*
Eddie: you guys know I hate scary movies! Last time I peed myself!!
Stan: It wasn’t even a scary movie-
Richie: It was scooby doo
Eddie: *crosses his arms* and?
Stan: You could just not watch the movie with us?
Richie: *puts on the hip movie uhh poltergeist yeah lmao that’s scary*
Eddie: okay peace out! *runs to his room*
Time: kachow
Richie: EDWARD
Stan: Eddieeeeeee
Eddie: *is sleeping in the other room*
Stan: *finds the b0y* *:0* *sits next to eduardo* *Q U I E T*
Richie: *:0 part 2* *plays with edward’s hair oop* *Q U I E T*
Eddie: *wakes up but is v v v tired* oh hi guys *yawn*
Richie: aloha *continues to play with edwards hair*
Stan: *stan* hi
Eddie: *is like half asleep* you know I love you guys
Stan: *uwu* *leeches to the eduardo* yeah we know
Richie: we love you too, dork
Eddie: *hugs the Stan and falls back asleep*
Stan: *sleep oclock*
Richie: *sleep oclock part 2*
Time: kachow
Rain: kapow
Eddie: *wakes up and it's dark out* Stanny?
Stan: *sl33p*
Eddie: hhhhhhh *sits up but cannot bc thy Roach*
Thunder: KACHOW
Rain: YEEHAW
Eddie: *screams bc of thy thunder*
Richie: *literally falls* FUCK
Stan: *awakens* What-??
Eddie: sorry guys- I'm not the best with thunder storms-
Thunder & Lightning: A
Richie: *roach* *hugs edward*
Stan: *hugs edward part 2*
Eddie: you guys are gonna suffocate me *giggly boye*
Richie: good *teehee giggly boye part 2*
Stan: noooo!! *giggly boye part 3*
Eddie: wow thanks Richie *kiss uwu*
Richie: yeahhh i’m tired- *sleep lmao* *also leech tho*
Stan: *pat* it’s really late
Thunder: ahaha H
Eddie: I know...I'll try to sleep
Stan: good! *kiss úwù* i’m going to sleep *sleep oclock*
Thunder: PENIS SAUCE
Eddie: *falls asleep cuddling the Stan*
Morning: peenids
Stan: *sleep sleep sleep*
Richie: *sleep sleep sleep*
Eddie: *is in the kitchen making breakfast* richie! Stanley!! Breakfast!!
Richie: *aWAKENS* F00D *falls into the kitchen ouchies* ouch
Stan: *awakens* *walks like a NORMAL PERSON* i’m tired *stan*
Eddie: *runs over to Richie* are you okay?
Richie: probably *ouchie there’s a bruise on his arm lmao* *s t an d*
Stan: you’re such an idiot
Eddie: yeah but he's our idiot *hugs the Richie from the side*
Richie: *kisses the edward uwu* thank you both for calling me an idiot
Stan: *hugs the b0yfriends* no problem idiot
Eddie: I love you guys so much but GOD DAMMIT THE EGGS ARE BURNT
Richie: you look like a burnt egg
Stan: don’t bURN THE HOUSE DOWN
Eddie: sit down on the couch or something- I'll have to remake breakfast
Stan: Alright *sits on the couch*
Richie: okay my guy *sits on the stan*
Eddie: Richie- you're going to crush Stan
Richie: too BAD
Stan: iM FINE-!
Eddie: I'm still confused about how you two like each other
Richie: *DRAMATIC GASP* Excuse you Stan loves me!
Stan: I do that’s a fact right there
Eddie: I'm so offended
Stan: Dont burn the house down, Eddie
Richie: *l33ch*
Eddie: I won't burn the house down, breakfast is done! Come eat before it gets cold
Richie: *l e a p s off stan and goes to the kitchen 😔👊*
Stan: *stans into the kitchen*
Eddie: *gets his own breakfast and sits on the couch*
Richie: *gets f00d and sits on the coffee table*
Stan: *gets f00d and sits next to edward* Rich, what the hell are you doing
Eddie: richie what the actual hell- *picks him up and puts him on the couch*
Richie: nooooo *goes back on the coffee table*
Stan: right, okay- can we go to the zoo today?? i want to see the bIRDS
Eddie: sure Stan- we can go see the birds
Stan: cool!!
Richie: can we get food there teehee
Eddie: sure Richie! And Stan I cant wait to Christmas so like *gives him a pet bird*
Stan: IT’S SO CHONKY *B I R D*
Richie: thats a sexy bird- where the fuck did you get money, Eds?
Eddie: I've been saving it up!
Richie: nice job, my guy
Stan: *birdbirdbirdbird* *:D*
Eddie: *kisses the Stan*
Stan: *kisses the edward*
Richie: ewww get a room
Eddie: you guys have literally made out on front of me before
Stan: you WATCHED??
Richie: ewwww eddie watches porn
Eddie: what!? No! I was watching tv
Stan: how did you know then?? we were like- in the other room??
Richie: no we weren’t dumbass
Eddie: it seems like every time I kiss one of you and other one makes fun of me!
Richie: calm yourself my guy *kisses the edward owo*
Stan: what he said minus the my guy part *kisses the edward after roach*
Eddie: hhhhhhhhhh *hugs the roach from the side*
Richie: *leeches to the edward* your hair is soft
Stan: include me you dorks *also leeches*
Eddie: watch me fall asleep again-
Stan: you better not because then I’ll fall asleep
Richie: and I’d get time alone and who wants that ew
Eddie: *yawns*
Richie: *kisses the edward’s forehead* wow what a cutie
Stan: I know right?
Eddie: stop it *hides under a blanket*
Stan: noooo come back *s natches edward*
Richie: *:(*
Eddie: *is in the Stans lap now*
Richie: *kisses the stanley and the edward*
Stan: *hugs the b0ys*
Eddie: *kisses the Stan for like 2 minutes*
Stan: *O W O* *y e e h a w*
Richie: gET A ROOOOM
Eddie: STANLEY WHY
Stan: *red intensifies* i don’t know-
Richie: HAHA GAY
Eddie: *v v v v v red boye* i-
Richie: you two are cowards, if i was in stan’s position right now you’d have to go to the doctor from all the bruises
Stan: *GAY PANIC*
Eddie: R-ICHIE)!!-
Richie: I’m just telling the truth
Stan: *red x28338383*
Eddie: *yeehaw to the Stan* I'm sorry-
Stan: *AHHH* *R E D*
Richie: god get a room this is classified as porn
Eddie: oh shush Rich *kiss uwu*
Richie: *Y E E H A W BR O* rekt amirite
Stan: *dYing*
Eddie: Richieeeeeee *hides and hugs him*
Richie: *hugs the stanley and the edward* you two are nerds
Stan: *red flavor*
Eddie: *cuddles up to the Richie* cold
Richie: *plays with eduardo’s hair heehaw*
Stan: *sleeps bc this is too much red is bad*
Eddie: *falls asleep with the Stan*
Richie: *also sleep heehee*
Phone: kachow my guy
Stan: ughhh *awakens to answer the phone*
Eddie: Stanny what's wrong?
Stan: shhhh phone call *answer phone* oh hi *phone talk*
Eddie: okay...*goes back to sleep*
Stan: *phone talk for an hour wtf* ok bye *phone hang up* *lays back down with the b0yfriends*
Eddie: Stanleyyyyyyy *lays on top of him*
Stan: oh- hi- *holds the edward and the roach’s hands bc owo*
Richie: *probably fuckimg— hibernating*
Eddie: *gives him a kiss but he's like v tired*
Stan: I’m tired bbbye *sleep oclock*
Eddie: *falls asleep on the Stan*
Later o’clock: hola
Richie: *awakens to make a grilled chhhheese*
Stan: *sleep?*
Eddie: *still sleep on stan*
Richie: *sits next to the b0ys and eat a good and cool sandwich* *uwu energy*
Stan: *aWAKENS*
Eddipe: *nuzzles the stan in his sleepp*
Stan: *pat pat* what time is it?
Richie: how should i know? we slept all day though, it’s dark again
Eddie: *wakes up but is very sleepy* huh
Richie: *s andwich* look who finally woke up
Stan: *quiet clapping*
Eddie: oh shush *nuzzle uwu*
Richie: *cough cough* gAy *cough cough*
Stan: you’re literally our boyfriend shut up
Eddie: I'll attack you with affection young man *jump on the rouch*
Richie: OH SHIT *falls over ouch* *giggly boye teehee*
Stan: *witnesses*
Eddie: *is on top of the roach behind the couch*
Richie: wow this is pretty gay
Eddie: oh so you don't like me being on top of you?
Richie: no, i’d rather be on top of you *teehee kiss owo*
Eddie: *big blush man*
Richie: *yeehaw x22*
Eddie: Stan helppppppppppp
Bev: *walks in* OH JEEZ
Stan: Hi bev- theyre fucking don’t mind them
Richie: nO WE ARENT
Eddie: *runs and jumps on Bev* HI BEV
Bev: HI EDDIE! IM STEALING YALLS BOYFRIEND
Richie: shit dude don’t do that *stAnds*
Stan: nooooo
Bev: oh- I came over here to ask you guys if you wanted to come to the mall with me! I got my driver's license very early for some reason but yeah!
Stan: Oh sure!!
Richie: bro the fuckimg mALL?
Bev: yes the mall idiot!! Okay who wants to carry this thing *points to eddie*
Richie: I don’t know I think he should walk beside the car, honestly
Stan: hmmm maybe
Eddie: wow yall are so nice
Stan: oh shut up we love you
Richie: accurate
Eddie: *puts on his purse (bev got him it) and runs out the door* GET IN LOSERS WE'RE GOING SHOPPING!!
Bev: I TAUGHT HIM THAT
Richie: what the hell why
Stan: uHHHH
Bev: JUST HURRY UP LETS GO!! YALL BETTER NOT GET NOSEBLEEDS BECAUSE IM WARNING YOU, EDDIE LIKES FOREVER 21
Stan: oh god- *car*
Richie: fucking christ *car*
-at the mall-
Eddie: WHERE ARE WE GOING FIRST
Bev: i dont know- Hooters?
Richie: I’m gay
Stan: I’m also gay
Bev: Yeah okay but they have good wings-
Eddie: oh I have a friend that works here! We can get free wings
Richie: is it your mom? i want to see her working at hooters
Stan: no what the fuck rich
Eddie: Richie-!!
Richie: what i’m just telling the truth
Stan: oh my god
Eddie: *holds Stans hand*
Stan: *:D*
Richie: *insect*
Eddie: *kisses the Stans cheek*
Homophobic couple: we. That's just not right! You boys are way too young
Stan: *>:”0*
Richie: eXCUSE YOU don’t INSULT my BOYFRIENDS *>:(*
Homophobic couple: there's 3 of you?? A couple is only 2 people, a boy and a girl! And that short one already looks like a girl so I guess it's fine
Richie: I will fuckign fight you *>:(*
Stan: no richie calm down *holds back the roach lmao*
Eddie: SHUT THE HELL UP! THIS FANNYPACK IS STYLISH
Richie: iT MAKES YOU LOOK HOT
Stan: Richard calm yourself good lord
Homophobic couple: ugh whatever *pushes the Eddie and walks away*
Eddie: oh well *flips his imaginary long hair*
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chernonbyl-moved · 5 years
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*ive made an old western/au for my ocs! idk if theyre anthrophormized /humanized thats rlly up to you but what i have for now is
Ana
formely in a gang, left after like 8 months for some honest job and actually managed to have a actual network business going onthen got too tired of this life and decided to move on to become a bounty hunter leaving her old posessions and owned buildings to both children she left both children with hara, as she didnt know if she would find a job outside the gang and wanted her children to stay at a place with food and with someone she knew
* skilled > knows how to hunt and how to survive in the wild > knows a wild variety of flowers that can be used for medicine or other purposes * altough, not a good shooter > she never really used a gun, in her old gang all she did was the cooking part and hunting > but, shes extremely clever and good at handling white weapons and throwing knives > doesnt confronts her victims and would rather catch them while sleeping or lure them > doesnt know the name of the guns lol
Hara used to be in the same gang ana was, but came very late but stayed there for at least 7 years or so helped ana flee the gang, she told her to run with her too but hara stayed, secretly hates her for running away, took care of both of her children and taught them everything they knew, later on Ana gave her ownership of her posessions *intimidating > despite being very small, shes. not fucking around > cannot stand men because most of the time, theyre the ones that challenge her skills most of the time but of course hara isnt the “all bark and no bite” type they all regretted later > “if you test me again, your family will never find your body” *very good at management of resources > has lived long enough to tell whats important, whats gonna last long and what isnt > tends to write down EVERYTHING, because she doesnt trusts anybody and is p sure theres a cockroach that sometime steals things despite everything, she raised ana’s children well, she sometimes worry if she failed to teach them kindness left the gang later to handle the business ana left for them Mary the youngest daughter of Ana, is old enough to manage her mother’s network but cannot because of Hara, much to hara’s dismay she managed to own one of the bars in a infamous town Mary is known for being THAT BITCH, she enjoys a good whiskey and company and also a good fight, men know her for being “hard to get”, difficult to marry” and “never took a man in” little they know; shes a huge lesbian *her own saloon > shes on there almost every night, either serving the drinks or watching her brother play the piano > makes sure all ladies are comfortable and happy, no one notices shes lowkey flirting with them > on that subject; youre allowed to do almost anything, cheat on poker, fight, piss on someone, but disrespect a lady?? youre out > its a good way for gangs to meet, she has a “secret discount” for her “favorite gangs”, sells informations to fellas if they pay more too > can tell who is new to the town and who isnt *fighter > WILL fight if forced to, again shes that bitch and she will punch you and she wil win >does no harm but takes no shit >only attacks men who have taken it too far, many call her a bitch but she doesnt care she never really cared > on that subject; if you say ONE mean thing to her brother, youre a dead man Isaac is the oldest brother, but way more anxious and smaller, he couldve stayed with hara after mary wanted her own thing going on but he and his sister are pretty much inseparable, plus hes scared of hara, actually met ana once but doesnt have an opinion on her he always wanted to have a calm hermit life on a farm but also live with mary, but since shes much more outgoing and sociable it just kinda made it hard for both of them, she promsied him she would save up enough to buy a farm for him  *At the saloon > Isaac plays the piano, he learned young from José, an old gang member > he doesnt talks to others much because hes nervous, sometimes plays poker but asks mary to join him because hes too scared to interact with other strangers, she does all the talk for him > HATES alcohol would drink coca-cola if it didnt had literal cocaine on it, is stuck with coffee forever which makes him even more anxious > SOMETIMES he talks to others, theres few people he knows and likes to talk to *nervousness >isaacs been nervous for long as he can remember, hes small and not that intimidating so hes easily picked on, is scared to be seem > mary does almost everything for him, picks his mail, goes to doctor with him, does the talk for him n etc, hes grateful to have a sister who actually cares about him and supports his hobbies and intersts > his anxiety led him to learn some skills to calm such as drawing or fishing, hes actually a good artist!
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bkanvas-fairy · 5 years
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Could you tell us a little about your characters?
Y E S !
but due to me having at least over a thousand characters I’ll just give a quick summary of the 25 I manage to dig up over 3 sketchbooks.
Y’all can pick and choose which of them interest yall or who you wanna hear more about!
Also because I’m extra, I made sketch icons for the 25 characters, info under the cut
I’ll talk a bit more about my actual Original Characters first, starting with
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Aiko! Otherwise known as Echo
- A marked individual in a steampunk world that gets mixed with magic, because I like both of those things
- Echo runs an underground lab that does helps the underground world with replacing body parts, illegal surgeries etc etc
- Even though she marked, which puts a bounty on her head already, she is well respected by the community for not cheating for your money, stealing your cash, or shanking/killing you mid-surgery
- however, Echo does long for adventure and sometimes do get bored in the lab
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oh yeah,, Echo like stealing eyeballs, so if you’re low on cash and wouldn’t mind losing an eye, you know who to call!!
Bonus:
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Here’s Echo’s boring, undeveloped sidekick!! I don’t like her and I don’t know how to make her better. Yes, she doesn’t have a name.
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here’s my god playboy that left “heaven” due to having an early mid-life crisis, I call him God boi cause;
- He goes by many names! 
tbh, he’s probably the closest character I have to being genderfluid/-neutral? I’m not sure,,
- The god has many powers, from lightning to shapeshifting
- The shapeshifting part allows him to change every part of himself, allowing him to change depending on his situation.
- God boyo, or originally Aristide, is obsessed with the idea of perfection. A god should be perfect, if a god is out of line, he is no god. 
- Same goes for him, which means whenever something is wrong with him, it affects him, extremely
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However, leaving the land of gods to live among humans aren’t all perks
- Aris isn’t immune to diseases or injuries. In fact, he actually fell down and died on impact when he came to earth, being reborn into another child immediately.
- He doesn’t gain his memories back automatically tho!! He has to have a major shock to the brain in order for him to remember his previous lives
- Sometimes the shock isn’t enough either, when you have a thousand over lives, you won’t remember every single one of them. So forgotten lovers coming back to haunt because your brain hates you? That’s everyday for him!
i just,, i like playing with the concepts of god,,
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Up next we got Ayeka Himura! A japanese student going to a neighborhood, but still a pretty good, school living close to poverty due to her father’s constant spending habits and obsession with art supplies. With the household lacking a mother due to wacky shenanigans, Ayeka takes care of her two younger siblings and the house, all while maintaining a very well-paid job and slowly loosing interest in actually studying for a good, honest job.
also she likes birds!!
Yes her design is heavily “based” off Toga but I love her current design too much to change it, h e l p
So like,, I suck at chinese and I made ocs that exclusively spoke in chinese to help with that but I’m still stuck at 40~marks
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I forgot his scar but remembered his earring i hate myself
my og chinese kiddo! he was was first to come and I love his design ever since
he radiates fuck you energy except the girl below. He’s neighbors with her and they acknowledge each other existence ever since. he has a dumb cliche crush on her and is a bit protective of her because nothing says having issues than latching onto someone that makes you happy
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Only this girl got named!! even tho she was the second character.
Li Shen, yes she doesnt have a surname, is apparently main ho now, according to my old oc chart of my “main” ocs
She’s the group’s resident sweetheart and really does not want you to do stupid shit, stop doing stupid shit. She tutors my son up there ^^ even though he’s actually smart and just refuses to do his work properly. But she still deeply cares for him.
As well as the girl below shdifhd
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the last girl of the ching chong trio and the reason I had to switch up my son’s design is this girly over here! Her design was too business-y and formal so I enrolled all of them into college. A rich girl who doesn’t know how to deal with her g a y thoughts. Tried sending Li Shen some flowers once. She didn’t realize attaching her name would be a good idea and son got a good laugh.
i like paranormal stuff so they apparently look into that shit in their spare time. They’re all actually really fun characters to do prompts with I swear!! send some in and I’ll write them
I had a previous concept for son and Li Shen before last girl came and if yall want me to talk about it,,, i found my sketchbook with the old ideas,,
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NEXT UP IS MY OLD GIRL ELORA!!
Elora herself used to be a fan character but I pulled her out and wow\
cant fucking believe she used to be straight for Vylad
shes the outgoing, fun adventure type! bit of mommy issues here and there tho,, I don’t want to say too much since I have an entire for her +
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her now upgraded bro, Vincent
i really like the name vincent,,
also now he has mommy issues
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Ead, the knight who used to have armor
I hate drawing armor 
he also have issues
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AND IRIS MY SWEET GIRL IM SO SORRY
she doesnt have that much issues tho
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basically I made elora and her bro have mommy issues, I’m sorry in advance if that spoils anything
I, sometimes, post about these 4 over on @eloradiesismydocsname​ and its a gay ol’ time
not that gay tho because uhh,, medieval times,, but I need prompts for a modern au of them and I am happy to talk about their personalities and even go semi in-depth for any of them!!
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here we have ghoster.png,, which is her file name cause I didn’t name her,,
A horror enthusiast + film student that goes to a supposedly haunted shack to film her upcoming project with the boys. wacky shenanigans occur and the boys left leaving ghoster here to starve and eventually fall to her death. But because it’s my oc i get to bring her back from the dead, now hungry as ever and will fucking eat you, its not a kink thing, shes just that hungry and angry
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tax fraud.png
a robo girl that i created during social studies cause they were talking about taxes and i just went, “what if,, a robo runs on taxes,,, and like,, she haunts you down for not paying your taxes,,” thus she was born! I don’t know what to name her but she is set in the future so-
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Time to go future-apocalypse style because I love that setting too and was upset that I didn’t have any ocs in that style. So I created Alex A. ! A cybrog filled with memories of the previous generations as a sad attempt to preserve human life.
He’s accompanied by his sister/cousin idr i didn’t draw an icon for her, didnt like her design. they go on a hunt for food and to return with nothing. She gets to meet this other dude who has a plant arm im pretty sure i based him off someone’s elses oc but i cant remember. The 3 are forgotten. Kinda want to bring them back tho.
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Neon! A character set in the future utopia of lazy people, where gamers rise up. its the best I can describe her story without getting too deep. She the new hacker on the block, joining the underground gang of elite hackers. She’s another one of those wacky characters that just has fun. I mean, when you know your way around codes and the world you live in is full of it, would you not take advantage of that?
as for fan characters,, uhh,, i have em
STARTING WITH MY WIFE!
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Alexzandra Zara oh my god i forgot to draw her necklace and shirt
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anyways,, Alexzandra is one of the more older ocs I have that didnt get a big revamp. Only an au I develop to the point I forgot the actual shows and the original cast are a little different from the source haha what? She’s the emotionally unstable german war veteran, yes the wife thing isn’t mutual, and haha shes only 27~. I cling onto her so much?? She’s hits a lot of “edgy” points but I still love her cause idk,, the story I made for her is something I hold dear cause Alexzandra was one of my first ACTUALLY DEVELOPED CHARACTER. Is it wrong to say I hold her really close to my heart? Is that weird? probably a little cringy sorry haha. I probably project a little into her which might have strengthened my love for her ack. Her story delves more into the depression very unstable needs to talk to someone side and i get scared talking about my wife’s story online so uhh, idk ask me specific questions about her, I’ll be more inclined to talk.
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Dr Watts! The spoiled ass dick that stole dst Wilson’s house and yes this is a dst oc, yes im slightly sorry.
He’s just fun?? almost ran a blog with him and a friend’s oc. He’s your typical uptight old science gramps that took advantage of the fact that no one knows his real name that he calls himself a doc. He’s not. I put everything about him up to a 9-10? He’s one of those wacky characters and I love him for it! His story is really wonky tho so might need help solidifying that part 
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and from the angry old man to my sweet man that will adopt you even if you’re noisy or call him ginger. Pilot here is a TF2 OC I made to interact with other tf2 OCs cause some of them are fun and i wanna join in :((
He’s the Canadian stereotype, and yes, he adopted scout, that was one of my character notes. 
Like the actual cast of tf2, there’s barely any real story to him. I only gave him a vague I don’t know my past but hey, i fly really really well. He participated in war unlike certain men but he’s still really nice and will only kill you if you hurt his family. Which he doesn’t know so he just considers the cast his family. He keeps mentioning a wife though, pretty sure he doesn’t have one but you do what makes you happy son.
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Ai! an oc I HEAVILY revamped oh my god i hate her old vers. So if yall remember my random shouting of missing my og son, Aru. Here’s his bff. cause he barely has any actual friends that give a shit. And I just cant have that. but here’s your yandere revamped into a last minute addition. I actually feel like I did Ai a lot of justice. I don’t want to delve too deep cause I will start making charts. I’ll do that in a separate post if yall are keen
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Isamu Aena! a mp100 oc I made by accident cause idk,, I was thinking about lolita fashion and all of a sudden, the actual oc I was going to make turned into a mob psycho oc. She’s one of my few ocs where her sexuality matters (she’s gay yeah) cause it plays a role in her storyline. She went from being “manipulated”/used to Mob’s wingwomen. She spots out things that can help him in the romantic department cause she’s into romance. A student of the school Mob infiltrated and a fantastic tailor, not to mention a pretty decent pyschic. wait where do models get their lolita stuff from,,
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im gonna ignore that and move onto Lillian Yi! Who, i swear i did not meant for it, is very close to lloyd. I mean,, none of the ninjas were with him after s3, who you think he’d meet. Lillian is a survivor from the Great Devourour and yes I’m still pissed LEGO stole my backstory for Lillian to use for Harumi. FUCK YOU LEGO, i still love both of em tho,, The event did leave a big scar and it made Lillian job jumping for a bit, ending at Chen’s Noodles in S6~, where ya know,, stuff got better. She was a medalist for gymnastics and continue the activity, even after her parents’ death, to please others. She was already lost at the time so staying in the sport would help, right? Needless to say, after being rejected at a cop academy for youths, or something similar, she gave up for a while but got back into the idea of saving people by using her skills she already had. It helped with the weight and feelings and meeting the green ninja was a very big bonus. Also Lloyd dubbed her the “mysterious stranger” when she refused to speak in fear of her identity, slight shame, and maybe a bit of being star struck. It helped Lloyd too in a sense where he had something to distract him from Zane’s passing.
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 Their relationship was eventually formed, strong and almost unbreakable, except for harumi but uhh thats a different story. Throughout the seasons, they stayed close and lloyd was always comforted by Lillian went times get ruff.
Also Lillian is my most light-hearted characters and I think that says a lot
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Then there’s Nite “I don’t want to be your dad”. A character that is supposed to be in the ninjago world but barely interacts with the main story and only stays in his self contained plot. He was supposed to get a bf but uhhh idk. He’s the master of shifting and streams that online, taking out small crimes, and is actually really shy and doesn’t like interacting with people.
also haha fortnite
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Nora Akino, the sin of despair! its an ad thing, I think. She speaks only in a foreign language that only Odin understands and is either big gay for Ava or Maggi, she can’t pick. And yes she did drink the vial, when TITAN attacks your planet and you accidentally die, how else can you meet your family again? also my grandpa walked in and said she looks like royalty. cool-
she wouldn’t leave my hand for like,, 3 days or something
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Petri, a fellow troublemaker at camp campbell’s music camp. She managed to pick the camp because apparently a parent who doesn’t acknowledge your hard work don’t read the fine print! Please let David adopt her,,
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LASTLY! Yukimaru Atsuko, hero name; Gummie. She goes by Yuki and is a big dick. She’s a studious student but gets more thrills on the actual battlefield. Living with her uptight grandma and her big bottom energy bro, she has the dom energy thing going. and apparently folks on G+, or the people who comment about her, thinks she’s really pretty, which was oddly a thing back before UA. She’s the dick you can like, not like Bakugou but she will definitely want to fight Bakugou. 
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A gum-related quirk is not full of perks when its only your hands. I’d dive more into her like her insecurities and stuff but I’ve been here for probably 3hrs. Sorry anon.
Also I’m so sorry to anyone who reads this all the way through.
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