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iamnotoriginalphil · 1 year

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Good Girl (13th Doctor x f!Reader)

Synopsis: You had trouble when the Doctor said a certain phrase

Words: 2.1k

Warnings: praise kink

The first time she’d done it, it was like your brain had short circuited. You froze, not sure what to do with yourself. Your skin felt overheated and your breath caught in your throat. Your fingers clenched and only later would you find the half moon imprints on your palm left over from the bite of your fingernails.

“Good girl.”

The murmur of the Doctor’s voice, typically quiet, echoed in your ears. It rang through your head. She wasn’t even looking at you, already distracted. All you’d done was make a suggestion, wanting to help her as much as you could. It had been said softly, barely more than a whisper, not something to be heard by another person. You weren’t sure she’d even meant to say it.

A nudge from Yaz’s elbow had brought you back, rebooting your brain. She slipped her hand through your arm, guiding you after the Doctor as she prattled on, spiralling off from your initial idea.

“You okay?” she asked, keeping her voice quiet.

“Perfect,” you replied, not needing anyone to know what had happened.

The second time she’d done it, you knew she hadn’t been talking to you. After a long adventure with entirely too much running, she’d agreed to take you all home. She’d been at the console for longer than usual, hands stroking over parts of it, mumbling to herself.

“Good girl.”

The pride in the Doctor’s voice when they landed was palpable. Your knees turned to jelly and you had to grasp on to some of the railing to stay upright. Butterflies fluttered in your stomach and your mouth turned dry. You couldn’t tear your eyes from her, despite her back being to you. You were surprised by how much you wanted to see her lips form the words.

“Come on, you lot,” she said, barely offering a glance over her shoulder before bounding out the doors.

Ryan clapped you on the shoulder, pushing you forward with a soft shove. You stumbled over your own feet, trying to reconnect your brain to the rest of your body. The fresh air helped clear your muddied mind.

The third time she’d done it, you’d been curled up on one side of the sofa, late at night, alone with her on the other. A strangled noise fought its way out of your throat, no matter how hard you tried to keep it quiet. You pressed your thighs tightly together, your book lying forgotten in your lap.

“Good girl.”

The Doctor’s voice was rough, tired, like sandpaper, and you could feel it scrape against your skin. You’d been reading out loud to her, a quiet murmur in the late hour. She’d asked you to stop, her praise given for your silence.

Her eyes turned up to you, widening barely a fraction of an inch. You felt your cheeks heat up and you ducked your head. She wasn’t meant to have heard, you didn’t want her to have heard. Your fingers tapped against the pages of the book. She shifted, the sofa cushions compensating for the change. A warm hand landed on top of yours, stilling your fingers.

“I should probably go to bed,” you said, the words quick on your tongue, “it’s late and I’m sure you have something wonderful planned for tomorrow.”

You stood, abrupt enough for her to fall back from you. You can’t bear to look at her as you hurried out of the room.

The fourth time she’d done it, you were treading water, struggling against the roiling waves of the ocean. Your hair was plastered to your head and adrenaline was still coursing through your veins. Your laughter cut off and you thought the sea might turn to steam where it touched your skin. You shivered, her arms holding on to you, keeping you from drifting away.

“Good girl.”

You’d always been good at following instructions. Jumping off the cliff at the Doctor’s shouted command had been one of the wilder ones you’d followed but you trusted her with your life. Still gasping from the rush, the words had come tumbling from her lips. Water drops clinging to her skin, her eyes were bright and her smile was wide.

She was so close, her arms around your waist. Your hands were resting on her shoulders and having her so close as those words came from her lips was both heaven and hell. She was watching you and you were finding it hard to catch your breath.

“I do appreciate when people can follow instructions,” she said, still grinning that beautiful grin, “surprisingly rare but a good skill to have. I wish everyone had your skills. Good skills. Brilliant skills. Brilliant person.”

“Thank you.”

A wave buffeted you both. She grinned, letting you go and making her way to shore. It took a moment for your brain to kick back in, to remember how to use your arms and legs appropriately. The cold water was the best thing for you in that moment.

The fifth time she’d done it, you knew she did it on purpose. Your teeth sunk into your bottom lip and your breath stuttered in your chest. Hands resting on the counter either side of your waist, caging you in, her eyes were dark, tongue darting out to wet her lips as she watched you.

“Can I try something?”

You hadn’t heard the Doctor come into the kitchen, turning around sharply. You were the only one in the TARDIS, the others back home with family relaxing, and you had assumed she was busy doing her constant repairs. But there she was, hands on her hips, looking at you with those eyes you found it hard to say no to.

“Sure,” you said, not sure what you were agreeing to.

Her steps were slow and steady, almost predatory, as she approached you. You froze, not sure what to do. It was as if she was pinning you down with one look. Her hands came up, trapping you against the counter. She lent closer, her breath ghosting over your lips.

“Good girl.”

The words were said with purpose. Enunciating each syllable as if they were a loaded gun. She watched your reaction, her own breathing becoming heavier, chest brushing against yours. Gaze dropping to your lips, something in her seemed to shift.

“Interesting,” she murmured.

“What is?” Your words were little more than an exhalation of breath.

“Your reaction to being called a good girl.” Her eyes swept down then back up, “you thought I wouldn’t notice but I have.”

You pressed your lips together, embarrassment rising in you. You thought you’d been doing so well keeping it under wraps. You’re been trying so hard.

“I notice everything about you,” she continued on as if not saying something sanity smashing, “I wonder if you’d have the same reaction if someone else called you a good girl.”

You made a strangled noise but shook your head, heat creeping over you. It was almost impossible to believe you were having this conversation with her, with the Doctor. Her gaze rested on your lips again, eyes growing molten.

“Yes, that was the noise that made me begin to realise,” she said, more to herself than you.

With a featherlight touch, her fingertip grazed over your lips. You didn’t mean for it to happen, but you whimpered, eyes fluttering closed. You heard her breath hitch, fingers stilling on your skin. You couldn’t bear to open your eyes to her, to let her see exactly how she was effecting you.

“I hope you don’t react this way if other people call you a good girl,” she murmured.

Your knees felt as if they were about to buckle. Your fingers grasped the edge of the counter, clenching painfully. Your breathing was ragged and there was a persistent throb between your legs.

The fingers were removed from your lips. You tensed, not sure what was going to happen next. Warmth grew closer and a pair of lips brushed against the shell of your ear.

“Good girl.”

With a strangled moan your eyes shot open. You released the edge of the counter and grasped her face between both hands. Pressing your lips against hers was electrifying. Every nerve ending was standing to attention and you were gasping into her mouth. She took a step closer, her body pressing against yours and it was too much and not enough and your head was spinning.

Strong hands pressed against your lower back, those powerful arms encircling your body. Her tongue swept into your mouth, taking charge as you whimpered, clutching at her. It was better than you’d dreamed and surpassed your hopes, hot and intense and desperate. She was kissing you like you were the air she breathed and she’d been starved for too long.

She lifted you until you were sitting on the counter, legs caught either side of her hips. Your fingers slipped into her hair, tugging on it. The moan that rumbled through her chest had you losing any semblance of control you had. All you could do was kiss her, wanting to feel her everywhere.

Her lips pressed to the soft skin behind your jaw, gently nipping at it. Your head was swimming. Her tongue was tracing patterns down the column of your neck and you held on to her, needing more, always more, encouraging every scrape of teeth against skin.

She kissed you again, slower and deeper, taking her time to explore. You were putty in her hands, turning into a mess as her tongue stroked along yours. Her fingers gently skimming along the skin of your back, worming under your shirt. You arched into her, feeling that same electricity run along your skin. There was something about her touch that had you addicted, needing more, needing it forever.

By the time she drew away you knew you were more puddle than person. You whined, trying to pull her back into a kiss. She chuckled and it made you feel warm all over. Those eyes of hers were still smouldering and her lips were kiss stung. Hair in disarray and colour high on her cheeks, she looked more beautiful than a sunrise. You wanted to kiss her again.

“Fascinating,” she murmured, running her fingertips along your lips again. You kissed them, watching the way her face lit up.

“Is it?” It was hard to concentrate with her standing between your legs and her fingers on your skin.

“I don’t think you understand exactly how fascinating I find you,” she said, her voice molten, “you’re always surprising me in new ways.”

“I am?” It was like the world was shifting underneath you.

“Just when I think I have a handle on you, you do something so wonderful I can’t help myself. I want to know everything about you. I want to praise you.” Her voice dropped an octave and you shivered, “you’re so good.”

Your legs instinctively tightened around her. A look of delight lit up her face and it made your heart miss a beat. She was so wonderful.

“Is it like this with other people?” she asked, fingers traced patterns over the top of your thighs. It was making it hard to concentrate on the conversation.

“Is what like this?” you asked.

“Does this happen with everyone who praises you?” she asked.

“No.” You bit down on your lower lip, “just with you.”

“Why?” Her head tilted to the side, eyes sweeping over you again.

“I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I have a bit of a crush on you,” you said, “only you.”

Wonder lit her up from the inside out. You could see how her eyes sparkled, brightening from the smoulder she’d been directing at you. A matching grin spread over your face as she continued to look at you as if you were a galaxy spiralling before her eyes.

“Kind of leaving me hanging here, Doc,” you said as the silence continued to stretch.

“Oh, right, yes, of course. I think you’re amazing. The bee’s knees. The cat’s pyjamas. Just the best. Absolutely brilliant. Mind blowing. You blow my mind,” she said, “and I can’t stop thinking about you. You’re always in my head. I’d tell you to get out but it’s quite nice having you in there. You can stay. I’d like you to stay.”

“Doc?”

She looked at you with such hope in her eyes. Your fingers, still tangled in her hair, gently tugged her closer.

“You can just kiss me again,” you told her.

You weren’t the only person who could follow instructions.

#13th doctor imagine #13th doctor x reader #thirteenth doctor imagine #thirteenth doctor x reader #doctor who imagine

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x-neurodivergent-reader · 8 months

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Headcanons: 13th Doctor x Autistic!Reader with a Special Interest in Steam Trains

@neurodiverse-dumpingground’s request: “Hi could you do a headcanon with the 13th doctor and autistic reader who’s hyperfixation is steam trains please!”

A/N: Here you go – since there are a few possible angles to be interested in for that topic, I tried to cover several of them, so hopefully it's a decent read no matter which part of trains you're into. Enjoy!

The reader here is gender-neutral.

Content warnings: None.

Want to go back to the industrial revolution to see the earlier steam trains, and perhaps even ride them? The Doctor has you covered!

The moment you started travelling with her, being able to go on (or at least see) every type of steam train you know of became one of the top things on your bucket list.

The Doctor is more than happy to assist with this, especially so other people can see how clever her beloved companion is – and she’ll even take you to see similar locomotives from other planets, so you can learn about more different types beyond those created by humans.

One of them was essentially a steampunk-themed planet, where the train workers you met were impressed by your knowledge and eagerness to learn about their technology!

Whenever you want to infodump – whether it be about different types of trains, or their mechanisms – the Doctor is technology-minded enough to understand every word.

Especially if it’s about how they function, she can talk back with equal enthusiasm, so you both get to bond over them with each other.

If there’s any historically-inaccurate holes in your previous research about them, she’ll also correct it, so you get to know even more!

While the Doctor would rather take you to see the older trains in action than go to a museum, if you fancy doing the latter, she'll be willing to take you there. Nobody pays much mind to the cheeky little smiles you exchange when you see a train you've seen/ridden many years ago.

If you like to collect things regarding steam trains – whether it be models, or just books to read – the Doctor will help you find them, or if you’re not present, she’ll get any she comes across and give them to you the next time she picks you up.

The TARDIS eventually makes an extension to your room to keep your train-related stuff in, so you have it all accessible in one big space!

Chances are that, at some point, one of your adventures going on a train turns into another heroic endeavour. This may or may not lead to you being able to put your knowledge to use by helping to get the train to safety yourself.

The Doctor can tell that this was the best day of your life, and your delight each time you reminisce on it is contagious to her!

#thirteenth doctor x reader #thirteenth doctor imagines #thirteenth doctor imagine #13th doctor x reader #13th doctor imagine #13th doctor imagines #doctor who imagine #doctor who x reader #thirteenth doctor x y/n #13th doctor x y/n #autistic!reader #neurodivergent!reader #my imagines

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13thdoctorplease · 22 days

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The Doctor (13th) comes to pick you up after a terrible weekend with your family

**I'm not fluent in english so PLEASE feel free to correct my mistakes!!! i'll gladly learn more

The screams are still very loud even after you closed the door. A sound of a slap follows, and you tremble slightly, even though it was just an usual sunday morning in your house. Your hands feel numb as you retrieve your phone, hidden under the pillow, and call the Doctor's number, tears stinging your throat.

"Hello?" She answers almost immediately, and you were about to respond when a door slammed loudly in the hallway, causing you to almost drop your phone in fear. "What's happening?" she asks before you could utter a word. You don't even attempt to steady your voice.

"Can you come pick me up?"

"Of course."

The Tardis materializes behind you, and the Doctor emerges from the doors in mere seconds, approaching you with worried eyes. And you are crying now. Crying and buried in her arms, your face nestled between her neck and shoulder. She frozes momentarily, unsure of how to react to the sudden hug, but quickly recovered and held you tightly.

There was no need for explanations as the sounds of their ongoing argument echoed from their room. You couldn't discern the exact words, but their heated voices send waves of anxiety through you. You are so sad, and so scared, and so tired.

The Doctor placed a comforting hand on your back as she led you to the Tardis, saying nothing as she navigated the console and whisked you away from that place.

You stood by the doors, tears streaming down your cheeks, and words stuck in your throat. The Doctor hurried back to you, cupping your face in her hands. The slight sense of comfort caused you to cry even harder, and in exasperation, she changed her position, pulling you close with her arms encircling your waist.

"I hate them." She says when you're not facing her anymore. You let out a soft sob against her chest.

"I don't." you reply. "But I wish they didn't hate each other."

You can almost feel the ghost of her lips against your forehead as she holds you close, gently guiding you to sit together on the stairs. You're so close to her, craving her touch and comfort so intensely that you're almost sitting in her lap, your head nestled against her chest and her hands resting on your thighs.

"I'm not sure what to say, but I'll hold you until I figure it out," she says with a faint chuckle.

"You're so kind, Doctor." You let out a little laugh.

"I'm sorry," she whispers, barely audible, and then she adjusts your position, pulling you onto her thighs and holding you tighter. "I'll always be here for you. No matter where or when. If you need me, I'll be there. I can't stand to see you sad."

"It's their fault," you whisper.

"You deserve so much love," she admits, finally giving in and planting a gentle kiss on your hair. You exhale, feeling exhausted yet experiencing something else you can't quite identify.

"You're the only one who makes me feel like I deserve it."

The Doctor runs her fingers through your hair, a gesture that speaks volumes even though she may not be certain how to comfort you. This closeness is new for both of you, and while she's always been kind, these recent moments feel more... intimate. She doesn't say anything, and she doesn't need to. You try to forget, if only for tonight, the rage and chaos that fills your home and focus on the love found in the Doctor's arms. She embodies everything the younger version of you always yearned for —being cared for.

"Do you want to go somewhere? she asks after a while. You open your eyes and raise your head to meet her gaze. She smiles softly. "I can think of plenty of fun places we could visit."

You return her smile but refrain from nodding.

"Can we just stay in for now?" you ask.

Her eyes soften. "Of course. I'm pretty sure there is a fireplace somewhere in the library... Does that sound good?"

Your heart is finally warm.

#13th doctor #13th doctor x reader #13th doctor imagine #doctor who fanfiction #thirteenth doctor #thirteenth doctor x reader

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flightlessangelwings · 2 years

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Kinktober Day 5- Leather

Thirteenth Doctor x fem!reader (no use of y/n)

Word Count- 990

Warnings- smut (18+ only), corsets, established relationship, titty worship, fingering, toys

Notes- I’ve missed writing for my wifey so much it’s been so long!! I just haven’t had the inspo til now, and I think this was is a little unexpected here! I took a slightly different take on “leather” but I had fun with it so I hope y’all enjoy! List provided by the lovely @the-purity-pen!

To say up to date on when I post, follow my update blog too and turn on post notifications @flightlessangelwings-updates. Reblogs highly appreciated!

“Hey Doctor, can you come here for a moment?” you called from your room. You stood with excited anticipation as you heard her sing-songy voice from down the hallway.

“Coming, love!”

You bit your lip as nerves suddenly overtook your system. You had only a moment to decide if you wanted to back out, but you knew the prize was well worth it. A chill ran up your spine as a rush of cold air hit your exposed skin.

“What’s going… on…?” The Doctor stood frozen in her tracks the moment she laid eyes on you.

The cold air suddenly didn’t bother you as your skin warmed and tingled under her gaze. She stood in your doorway dumbfounded at the sight before her: you in a tight leather corset and lace panties and nothing else.

You shifted your weight from foot to foot nervously, “You like it, Doctor?” you asked shyly as you suddenly became aware of how much your breasts poked out of the tight corset, “I got this when we visited that old village the other day. The lady was really nice and helped me figure out how to tie it… Oh!”

In a rush of movement, the Doctor sprinted across the room and lept at you. One moment you were on your feet rambling nervously, the next you found yourself on your back on your bed with your beloved Doctor straddling your hips. She even managed to shed her coat in the two seconds it took her to pin you down.

“I love it,” her voice was low as he hovered her lips over yours, “Darling, you look absolutely gorgeous.”

You moaned as she took your lips with hers in a heated kiss. You propped yourself up to reach her better while her hands roamed up and down the leather corset that adorned your body. Heat warmed your body as your skin tingled under her touches.

“Doctor…” you whispered as she kissed her way down your neck.

“Shhh,” she purred, “I’ve got you, love,” she gently pushed you onto your back, “Now let me get a good look at this.”

The Doctor sat up, her hips comfortably on yours as her eyes soaked you in. Your breasts filled the corset perfectly, and with each deep breath you took in, you unconsciously pushed them up even more. A smirk lit up her face, and before you could ask what ran through her mind, she had already pounced on you again.

You let out a loud moan when she attached her lips to your breasts where they stuck out over the top of the leather corset. Her tongue licked and lapped at your skin as she savored every moan and cry you let out. Your hands gripped onto the sheets as you arched your back into her body, desperate for more.

While her mouth worked your breasts, the Doctor ran her hands down the corset once more. She savored the feeling of the smooth leather against your skin, and she giggled softly when she reached the hem of your panties.

Always a tease, the Doctor ghosted her fingers along your clothed clit a few times. She loved to see your every reaction to even the slightest touch, and she loved more than anything to bring you pleasure. Of course, she knew she had to reward you for the surprise too.

“Please…” you moaned as she continued to rub slow, light circles on your clit.

“Alright love,” she cooed as her fingers pushed your panties aside to reveal your dripping pussy, “Eager aren’t we?” she added with a smirk.

“Well I didn’t struggle to get this corset on just for you to stare,” you restored back with a smile.

“That’s my girl,” the Doctor purred as she pushed two fingers into you.

You let out a loud cry at the intrusion, but it was more than a welcome one. The Doctor wasted no time and pumped her fingers in and out of you right away while she leaned over your body to suck on your breasts once more. You threw your head back as you drowned in the pleasure she gifted you.

She kissed her way along the top of your corset and nosed her face against your breasts while she did so. She knew your body well, and she knew exactly what spots drove you wild, so she grabbed one of your breasts and popped it out completely so that it sat on top of the tight corset. Once it was free, the Doctor attached her lips to your nipple and sucked hard while she sped up her fingers.

“Fuck… Doctor…” you cried out in pleasure as you wrapped your arms around her shoulders and buried your hand in her blonde hair, “I’m gonna…”

She moaned into your breast as she pumped her fingers even faster, and rubbed your clit with her thumb every time they were fully buried inside you. It only took a few more thrusts of her fingers before you completely fell apart and came with her name on your lips.

As much as she wanted to, the Doctor couldn’t break away from your breast to watch you cum for her. Instead, she licked and sucked at your nipple while she felt you gush into her hand and tug on her hair. When your moans turned to whimpers, she slowed her rhythm until she carefully pulled out of you and broke away from your breast with a loud pop.

She sat up and watched you before her, a mess with just a corset on your body. And you had never looked more beautiful to her. “This was a nice surprise, love,” she laughed.

You opened your eyes and looked up at her, “I knew you’d like it,” you replied with a giggle, “Now how about we get the strap and go a few more rounds?”

The Doctor’s eyes sparkled at the thought, “That sounds wonderful, love.”

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whittakerjodie · 1 year

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Forced to Watch (A belated Febuwhump Post) 13th Doctor X Reader

A/N: So sorry for not posting I fell out of love with writing fiction a little bit but I miss it! Also this is from febuwhump 2022... meant to post it this year then I forgot... awkward moments. whoops. I don't really like this one but it's got some good lines!

Warnings: implied violence, direct references to violence, etc.

Word Count: 2.5k

The silence moving through the air of the cage was deafening. Between it all, left unsaid, was a blame that could not be placed on either of you. But attempts were certainly being made, at least in your own head. It was you that had gotten the two of you into this mess. It was your stubbornness that had put a target on your heads in the first place, your misspoken words that had labeled you and the Doctor as traitors to the crown, as spies. All because you wanted to see more, wanted the adventure to go perfectly, your way, for once.

After all, the Doctor had let you choose your destination. This time, you thought, you could be like her. You could pull her through the unknown, show her new and exciting things. Instead, you had landed the two of you in a cage, waiting to face an unknown danger. Danger wasn’t unknown to you as the Doctor’s companion. But it was different when it was your fault, when it was more than just an occupational hazard. When it was avoidable.

You certainly felt like avoiding everything right now. The Doctor didn’t seem to mind the situation, peering around the empty abyss your cage hung in for clues or escape routes. Perhaps if you apologized once more, ignoring what she said about not having to, it would be enough to prove you were really sorry.

“Don’t apologize again,” The Doctor said softly. “You really don’t have to. Besides, it’s not all that bad. Remember when we were stuck in-”

She was cut off with a small yelp as the cage was tugged upward, violently so. She tried to steady herself on the bars of the cage. However, just as she made her attempt, the cage was tugged again and the force of it sent her across the cage and on top of you with a loud thud. You tried to gasp, but the air was knocked out of you at the same time. Your own body moved awkwardly as you were pulled upward, pushed against the bars. The Doctor tried to steady the two of you, only succeeding in crushing your chest tighter.

“Looks like we’re getting out of the cage at least '' You winced as the alternative came into view; the Qupaci were rather hideous, both in personality and appearance. The majority of their faces were covered by the large tusks protruding from their mouths, from which putrid green saliva dripped. The Prince of the Qupaci, sharing these traits, surprisingly hadn’t caught your eye on the dance floor, where you and the Doctor had been so innocently dancing and talking several hours earlier. Your attention completely captured by the timelords dashing black suit, you hadn’t noticed him make his way onto the floor and towards another alien dancing near the two of you.

You hadn’t realized the words you shared could be seen as conspiratory either. Big mistake.

The Prince was at the back of the crowd that greeted you, watching as the cage reached the top of it hung from. Through the wrinkles and boils covering his face, you could make out his smug expression even from some distance. It stayed in your mind, the image twisting and curdling with the contents of your stomach.

“Right, I think it’s time we talk '' The Doctor said sternly. You looked at her, eyes wide. The Qupaci guards had already drawn quite a few weapons. You weren’t sure it was time to talk just yet. The Prince and his guards laughed, and he made his way towards the pair of you.

“My council deals with many issues these days, with tensions being so high. There is a lot of stress. But there are ways to relieve that stress as well” His lip curled around one of his fangs as he spoke, turning into a smirk. His eyes flitted to one of his ‘council’ members next to him, who was holding a rather rusty looking knife. You winced.

“Crosswords?” The Doctor said sarcastically. She stood, prying herself off of you and wrapped her hands around the bars of the cage, sneering at the Prince. “Best not to threaten me.”

“I promise you, Doctor, there is no threat. Or, at least…” The Prince turned to his guard and shouted: “Not an empty one!” They all cheered, one grabbing the cage and pulling it onto solid ground. The Doctor did not budge, supported by the cage. You, however, had been trying to pull yourself up and were rudely thrust back to the floor of the cage. Cheeks burning in humiliation, you quickly stumbled to your feet- eyes meeting the Princes.

“This one,” he growled.

“I don’t think so” The Doctor hissed in response, doing nothing to slow your quickening heart rate. You had been chosen. But for what?

“Andraxi will have fun with them,” One of the guards said through their slobber. “I wonder which tools he’ll choose.”

“You’re not laying a finger on them” the Doctor said louder, voice echoing throughout the cave.

“Do you know what the Qupaci do to traitors?” Another guard asked, his S dragging on teasingly. You winced. Clearly whatever they had in store wasn’t great. You stared at the back of the Doctor’s head, as if you could somehow read the thoughts occurring inside of it. What sort of plan was she dreaming up? Hopefully there was one in the first place.

“We’re not traitors” You said, trying to keep your voice steady.

“Are you calling me a liar?”

“Coward might be a better word,” The Doctor snarled. As soon as the words left her mouth, you witnessed something more rare than the birth of a star- a look of pure regret crossed the timelord's face. After all, the words had inspired several more of the aliens to step closer, drawing their weapons, staring at you with intent.

“You, then?” The Prince said coldly. He had squared his shoulders, trying to brush off what the Doctor had said.

“No!” You shouted, having successfully gotten to your feet and to the Doctor’s side. She looked at you, alarmed, and shook her head.

“Yes, me, then. Can’t say I won’t make it a challenge for you.” Her eyes were narrowed, scanning the Prince’s for any other cracks to pry open before he managed to even begin whatever sick plan was in place.

“No,” You insisted. Her narrow eyes focused on you, not losing any intensity. She wasn’t just warning the Prince, now. “I got us into this mess.”

You lowered your voice. “Besides, you’re the one who can get us out of it.”

“I’m also the only one with regenerative ability. Get. Back.” You followed her order out of surprise, physically jumping back, and instantly regretted it. Your chance at an upper hand was lost immediately. Forfeited by your own instinctive dedication.

“Doctor please,” You whispered. “Just because you can heal.. Doesn’t mean you should have to. Please”

“What should I do then, let you suffer?” You held each other’s gazes for a brief moment, waiting for the other to give in.

In the back of your mind you registered the door to the cage opening, but its implications did not fully hit you until scaly arms were dragging the Doctor away from you, another pair shoving you roughly down to the floor. You scrambled up to the door just as it slammed shut, a metallic ring filling your ears as you yelled for the guards to bring her back. The Doctor avoided your gaze as they pulled her out of sight, eyes fixated on the Prince.

He turned to you and chuckled. Reaching through the bars, one of his fingers- no, claws- brushed away a tear, mocking the comfort you should be receiving from the Doctor. You pushed his hand away, and he grasped your shirt instead, pulling you against the bars as tightly as he could. So tightly that it was a wonder the metal didn’t bend to your form.

“Don’t worry, you’ll have your turn before the night is over.”

_____

The next half an hour was a blur. Firstly, you were slowly lowered back down into the abyss below, left to hang alone. There was nothing you could do. Any attempt to move the cage simply caused it to rock and sway from side to side, your stomach moving twice as fast than it. Desperate for something to happen, you laid your head against one of the bars, trying to extend your ears. Waiting for a noise; the sound of the Doctor’s footsteps, preferably. A reassuring comment, or perhaps the buzz of the sonic. Those were the sounds you wished for, too scared to think of the possibility that you might hear a shriek or scream instead.

The Qupaci were not merciful enough to only allow you the ability to hear them. The cage began to lower further, and you gripped the bars tightly to steady your bones. When you and the Doctor had been captured, the cage had never strayed lower than where you had been seconds ago. What awaited you at the bottom?

There was a loud rumbling, and the darkness started to part in the middle. A door was opening below you. Whatever awaited you was approaching fast. You gripped the bars tighter as the cage picked up speed, as if the rope that held it was running out, falling with you. Sure enough you began to simply fall, until you landed on the floor with a thud. Your body rose and fell against the bottom of the cage, making you groan in pain.

“Y/n!” The Doctor’s concerned voice. Exactly what you needed to hear right now. Just… not in the way it was delivered. When you looked to where her voice was coming from, propped up on your elbows and eyebrows drawn together in focus, your heart fell.

The crowd of guards had parted enough to give you the full view that you wished you didn’t have. The Doctor was strapped to a long, metallic table, her bonds attached to her ankles and each hand, which were spread and raised above her head. They were red, betraying whatever small movements the Doctor would’ve likely been trying to use to escape.

“Are you-”

“Enough!” The Prince yelled. You rushed towards the end of the cage with a distressed yell.

“Let her go!”

The guards and the Prince paid you no mind. The very few that did only offered you a sinister chuckle. They were all stationed at the front, surrounding the Doctor’s bound form. Their cloaks were different from the others. The Prince’s council, you determined. The ones who so desperately needed to resolve the stress they experienced. You gulped as they reached into their pockets and yelled again. The Doctor stared down at the various tools and her gaze hardened. Your heart tore as you realized she was trying to brace herself for what was to come; trying to brace herself for you.

The next few hours were a blur, existing in a special purgatory within your memory. One second, it seemed as though your brain were erasing each minute entirely, getting rid of every piece that was too hard for you to bear. The next, it seemed as though each of those pieces were receiving their own horribly intense spotlight, each movement, each slice or scratch or hit echoing through your bones and soul. Every single one of the Doctor’s yells and groans, uttered through grit teeth and eyes shut tightly.

Looking at the Doctor now, it was as if your brain was conjuring it all up. You wished that was the reality. The golden glow of regeneration energy had been flowing throughout the room for several minutes, wrapping itself around the two of you. The dust only rested near you for a brief time, healing any bruises you’d received. Its real task was to heal its owner, who had suffered so much. In the end, the servants of the Prince had decided to take advantage of his focus on torturing the timelord to carry out a long awaited uprising, freeing the two of you in the process.

“This could’ve been you,” The Doctor sighed, breaking you out of your mental recap. “But, see?”

She held up her shirt, showing off the side of her midriff. Her shirt was still torn and ripped from where the Prince and his council had carried out their evil deeds, but there were no marks as evidence.

“I can heal,”

“It shouldn’t have been you,” You breathed, the air exiting your lungs in a shaky breath. The power behind it made your chin wobble, made your shoulders shake. Your face squeezed together, trying to hold back the tears that were gathering in your eyes. The Doctor softened and took your hand in hers, kissing the back of it. “I hate that you.. I hate them, for doing that to you, I couldn’t help and it hurt, so bad”

“We got out, it’s alright,”

“You could’ve gotten us out,” You said weakly. Your body was giving in to the fear and grief that it had held onto so tightly for hours, weakening your skin and bones. “Would it have been so bad if it was me? You could’ve-”

“Don’t say that. Don’t you ever say that. I felt what they did” You winced, remembering the exact moment your heart broke, the exact moment the Doctor’s walls fell, just moments before the servants had burst through the doors. When you let out a small cry, the Doctor pulled you to her chest for a moment, before pulling you back and holding you by the shoulders. “I saved you. I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

"Why can't I save you, why can't I help like you-"

"Because you're not me!" The timelord shouted. She let go of your shoulders, and you froze. "You're not me, and you never will be. You can't be. I get hurt, Y/n. That's how it is, how it always has been. The least I can do is try to make sure you don't"

You shrank backward, all resolve disappearing. The Doctor took a step back as well, rebuilding the same walls that you had been forced to watch crumble.

Later you would both find each other in the library, seeking the other out. In silence, you would both come to accept that it might take a while to process everything that had happened with the Qupari and all that had been said after, words that could not be taken back. Words that conveyed the terrible, terrible truth of traveling with the Doctor. She got hurt. You had, you did, you would, as well. But your days were not infinite. Your pain was not infinite. Hers, tragically, was. One day you would stop running, stop remembering, and existing. But the Doctor would continue on, unable to give up despite the desire to, only able to keep hold of her duty of care.

#13th doctor x reader #13th doctor #thirteenth doctor x reader #doctor who imagine #13th doctor imagine

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writerswho · 1 year

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Bestie can you please write a scene where the reader sees the Tardis for the first time and does the whole "it's bigger on the inside" bit but then follows it up with a your mom joke

Hi, sorry for the delay. I don't know if I managed to do it the way you imagined because I'm not familiar with jokes and had to Google it to make sure I knew what it was, but I think I got it. I hope you enjoy it.

You don't know how on Earth you end up in the middle of a cross fire between fish people and lizard people, but you're certain you don't want to be there any more. You try to run, dodging the bullets (wait, are those lasers?). You fall on your face and curse under your breath because, of course, you would fall flat on the floor. Even when your life literally depends on it, you still cannot manage to run in a straight line. From a glance, you see a blue box, just big enough for you to ride inside. You run to the box and the moment you cross the doors, you think that maybe, very probably, you hit your head harder than expected when you fell.

The inside of the small blue box is giant, its interior resembling a cave with huge curved crystals forming a semicircle around what appears to be some sort of control desk.

There are two people around the table, and they look in your direction as you pass through the door. One of them is short and blonde and has questionable fashion sense, matching braces and rainbow with a pair of high-waisted teal blue capri trousers. The second person has the most exceptional hair you have ever seen in your life, with golden curls that shine in the carve-like room light. They wear dark gray jodhpurs trousers and a white leather jacket buttoned up with a fur waistcoat over it, a wide black leather belt around the waist and leather boots that are extremely high. There is a holster attached to one leg.

Stunned, you take a step back, leaving from the same place you entered. You continue walking backwards without breaking eye contact with the two people or the inside of the blue box.

“Do we need to do this now?” the person with the space hair asks.

“Come on, you love this as much as I do,” the one with the rainbow replies. Both have fond smiles.

Totally ignoring the surrounding danger, you scan the outside of the box. It is a normal police booth, the kind you see in old movies and series, the ones you are sure you have seen in some old photographs of your grandparents. You circle the booth clockwise, then retrace your steps counterclockwise. You knock on the cabin, kick it lightly, look for hollow or false spaces or anything that explains the difference between the outside and the inside. You return to the starting point in front of the double doors that are open, showing the two people enjoying your little show.

The sounds of the battle grow louder, and their smiles falter.

“Not to be rude,” says the one with the hair, “but we're kind of in a hurry to get out of here. Do you want a ride or not?”

You think you say yes, as you find yourself inside the box once again. The doors close behind you with a loud bang that brings you out of your stupor.

“Oh, they are going to say it,” comments the one in braces.

“It's bigger on the inside,” the words escape from your mouth as if you had a greater force compelling you to say them. “Like yo mama.” They look at you in surprise and amusement, the one with braces and rainbow stripes crackles loudly, it's as if they could roll on the floor for laughing so hard at any moment. You feel your face burn with embarrassment, wishing you had stayed outside. Facing fish people and lizard people is much better than this kind of humiliation.

“You know, in all these years, this is the first time anyone has said this,” the one with the questionable fashion sense says.

“Hold tight,” is all the other say as they start fiddling with buttons on the big round thing in the centre of the room. The other tries to help, tinkering here and there, but every time they do something, the one with the extraordinary hair undoes it. The whole room starts to shake, and you feel that maybe, in fact, you were safer with the fish and the lizards. However, there is no turning back now, so you hold on tight and hope for the best.

#doctor who #the doctor #river song #thirteenth doctor x reader #doctor x reader #thirteenth doctor imagine #doctor who imagine #13th doctor imagine #resquest #send requests #requests

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tvimagines221b · 1 year

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Imagine: The Doctor telling Yaz why The Master took you hostage.

Standing just outside of the TARDIS, was The Doctor. She needed a moment to think. There was dozens of thoughts scrambling her brain, and it was quite hard to focus on one thing. But she did know, that she was extremely worried. About Y/N. About how and why The Mastsr had taken her hostage. Turning her head at the sound of footsteps, The Doctor’s brow furrowed as she laid eyes on who was approaching her. Yaz. Yaz slowly approached her. Of course, The Doctor could tell that Yazmin had something on her mind, something that she wanted to say. “Doctor.” Yaz spoke up. The Doctor didn’t speak, instead she would rather let Yaz speak first. Then she could answer her. “Doctor… Why did The Master take Y/N? She’s just a kid, she hasn’t done anything.” Yaz knew The Doctor was worried about her just as she was.

The Doctor sighed. Oh how it was such a long story. But… Yaz should know.

“The Master has known Y/N for a very long time. Ever since she was just a baby on Gallifrey.” She told her. “They have a past.”

“What?” Yaz quizzed.

The Doctor nodded. It wasn’t just The Master and Y/N. All three of them had a past. It was just that Y/N had been pulled into an age old battle between The Doctor and The Master. “Yes.”

Yaz looked down. What did that mean? How did they have a past? “How? How do they know each other?”

The Doctor let out a shaky breath. “Back on Gallifrey a long time ago, uh… The Master saved Y/N when she was a baby. He…he was very close with her Mother, they were like siblings. She asked him to take her with him, when he was fleeing the war. And…he did. He took Y/N with him, and he sent her to earth. To give her a chance at a good life. A happy one.”

Yaz looked back up. Her eyes had grown wide. “What?”

The Doctor once again, nods. “The Master he… He is mischievous and insane. But… He cares for her. I.. I never truly understood why or how. But he does. I’ve seen it!” She went on. “I’ve seen him protect her. Even in the midst of his schemes and his terrorizing, he somehow finds a way to care for her. The Master has taken her. And while I know he won’t hurt her, it can’t be for nothing. He’s up to something, Yaz. And it worries me.”

Yaz’s expression softened. “Doctor… It’s going to be okay. We’ll get her back.”

“I hope so…” The Doctor replied.

#thirteenth doctor imagine #thirteenth doctor #thirteenth doctor x reader #13th doctor #13th doctor x reader #13th doctor imagine #doctor who x reader #doctor who imagine #doctor who

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elijahslittleprincess · 11 months

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specialagentlokitty · 8 months

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13th doctor x reader - the ghost of you

The doctor had absolutely no idea where she ended up, the whole planet was cast in a golden glow, almost surreal.

She had never seen it before, she didn’t recognise it, so she stepped on to it with uncertainty, and she began to look around.

Then when it happened.

A smell of old books and candles.

Something she hadn’t smelt together in a long time, and she tensed up as she watched a figure stretching not far in front of her.

“God I need to remember not to lay on that floor…”

The doctor stared in shock, and as the figure turned around they didn’t seem to pay much mind to the staring.

“What’s caught your interest now love?” You asked gently.

You began to looked around, but you couldn’t see anything around you, and you looked back to find the doctor even closer.

She was stood right in front of you, and you furrowed your brows in confusion.

“Is it… is it really you…?” She whispered.

“Oh sweetheart…”

The doctor slowed reached up, and she touched the side of your face, rubbing her fingers along your cold skin.

“You’re so cold..”

Tears filled her eyes and she crushed you into a hug and you hugged her back, both of you falling to your knees.

“I keep turning around and expecting to see you…”

“If you see my now it’s all in your head my love… you need to go..”

“No.. no I can’t.. not again..”

You pulled away and wiped her tears, placing your hand on the side of her face.

“I’ve always been with you, I’m not going anywhere but if you stay this planet will destroy you…”

“I can’t leave you behind again..”

The doctor looked at you with sad eyes, and you felt your heart break for her.

You had always been able to see her since you had passed away, but she hadn’t been able to see you.

She wasn’t there when you passed, it was all so sudden she, or rather he, at the given time, was unable to come be by your side.

And you knew over the years it tore the doctor apart.

Leaning forward, you kissed her forehead, running your fingers through her hair.

“You can’t let it end this way doctor, okay? The universe still needs you.”

“And I need you..”

She leant into your touch and you sighed softly, running your thumb along her cheek as you smiled softly.

“You’ll always have the memories, but you need to go please.”

“Then I can’t see you again..”

You held out your arms and she fell into you, letting you hug her tightly.

She had missed your embrace, your smell, the sound of your heartbeat.

She had missed you.

“This is all in your head…”

“It was real back then and it’s real now..”

Kissing her head, you turned your attention to the golden sky, clenching your jaw a little bit.

You didn’t want the doctor to die this way.

But you didn’t want to face the heartbreak of making her leave you behind once again.

The doctor pulled away and she took a deep breath, and she looked at you.

“You’re still just as beautiful.”

You smiled softly, and you leant forward capturing her in a kiss.

She quickly kissed back, pouring everything she had into it and every time you pulled away she would lean forward to kiss you again.

She needed to remember how it was to have you here, to kiss you, to hold you.

“Please my love, don’t die this way…”

“But then I’ll leave you behind..”

You shook your head and stood up taking her hands in yours as to backed up towards the TARDIS.

“I will always be with you.”

The doctor stoped, and she held your hand.

“Just an hour, please.”

You looked at her and nodded your head.

So you spent the hour with her leaning on your chest, your arms wrapped around her just staring at the golden planet.

And when it was growing too dangerous you made the doctor stand up and you walked her to the TARDIS and you stood outside.

“You’ll stop seeing me after a few moments, but I’ll always be here with you I promise.”

“How will I know?”

You smiled, and the doctor watched as the light twinkled in your eyes.

“You’ll know I promise.”

You stepped inside the TARDIS, and the doctor hugged you until she couldn’t feel you anymore.

She sent the ship into flight and she battled with her tears as she looked at the photo of you.

All she wanted was you by her side once more, but she couldn’t change the past as much as she wished that she could.

She would look around for you all the time, in your favourite spots, in your favourite things.

Anything to remind her of you.

And as she fell to the floor, tears running down from her face, she felt her hearts break.

She took a deep, shaky breath, and titled her head back, and just got a second she could have sworn she saw you.

A cold hand in her shoulder for a moment.

You were there, just like you promise her you would be

#doctor who #doctor who x y/n #doctor who x reader #doctor who x you #doctor who imagine #13th doctor #13th doctor x reader #13th doctor x you #13th doctor imagine

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lanawinterscigarettes · 4 months

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cleaning up bottles with you on new year's day (Thirteenth Doctor x reader)

Summary: you and The Doctor spend New Year's morning cleaning up after a long night of celebrating

Warnings: mentions of drinking/slight overconsumption of alcohol, established relationship between reader and 13, kissing while drunk (it's completely consensual as both reader and 13 are only slightly tipsy and know what they're doing), pretty sure that's it

A/N: cute and fluffy fic for the first of a very new year! this is based (loosely) on the taylor swift song new year's day off her album reputation. I hope you guys like it <33

You had decided to hold a party at your place for New Year's Eve, inviting everyone from the fam to come celebrate, including The Doctor, who was your girlfriend. The lot of you talked, laughed, and drank the night away until finally New Year's approached, everyone cheering and popping open another bottle of champagne once the clock hit midnight.

It wasn't until well past two that everyone decided to call it quits, stumbling outside along with them so you could give them all a proper goodbye. After calling a cab for the rest of the fam as a reassurance they'd all get home safe, you headed back inside, sighing when you realized just how much of a mess had been left behind for you to clean up.

Even though you were still a little tipsy from your earlier consumption of alcohol, you knew if you didn't get started now you'd regret it once you woke up. Grabbing a garbage bag from the kitchen, you started throwing away the empty bottles, trying to be careful so you wouldn't break any of them.

"Here, let me help you with that." The Doctor's soft voice came from behind you, carefully taking the bag from your hands. "I wouldn't want you to drop this and hurt yourself."

You nodded your head at her reasoning. It made perfect sense not to trust a partially drunk person with something as fragile as glass.

"What are you still doing here? I thought you left with the TARDIS." You handed her an empty bottle, looking confused.

She shook her head as she took it from you, carefully placing it inside the garbage bag. "I only went inside for a moment to make sure it was landed properly, so I could stay here for the night. Well, I suppose it's day now, isn't it?"

Laughing softly, you gave her another bottle to be thrown away. "Yup. Happy New Year's."

"And to you, too." The Doctor gave you a playful look as she put the last of the bottles in the bag.

You watched as she took it and set it by the door so neither one of you would forget to take it out later on. "Hey, I just thought of something," you said suddenly as you leaned up against a nearby wall.

"Oh? And what's that?" She asked curiously as she walked back over to where you were standing.

"I never got a kiss from you for New Year's," you said with a pout, crossing your arms.

She let out a laugh before leaning in, her face right next to yours. "Well, maybe I can fix that for you."

She kissed you, her hands reaching up to cup your face. You could taste the remainder of champagne and a bit of wine on her tongue when her lips met yours, not that it bothered you.

Once she pulled away, you let out a content sigh. "Happy New Year's, indeed."

She chuckled before brushing her lips against yours again. "Happy New Year's, love. Let's hope it's as good as the last."

"It will be-" you murmured, your hands resting on her shoulders as a way to both bring her in closer and steady yourself "-if I'm spending it with you."

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#gender neutral #x gender neutral reader #gn reader #x gn reader #doctor who #doctor who imagines #doctor who imagine #doctor who x reader #doctor who fic #thirteenth doctor #13th doctor #13th doctor imagines #13th doctor imagine #13th doctor x reader #13th doctor fic #doctor who fluff #13th doctor fluff

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diamondwaters · 2 years

Text

❝ love is a choice ❞ chapter xii

summary: what was meant to be a simple, calm trip to an intergalactic museum ended up becoming a a trip through memories the doctor rather wanted to forget. only they weren't her memories. they were yours.

pairing: thirteenth doctor x reader (primary), eleventh doctor x reader

word count: 5.0k

warnings: bad past relationships

author's note: welcome to the chapter that i have been WAITING FOR!! i've had this chapter in mind for months and now there time is finally here!! that being said, i am very, very sorry for what you are about to read

The dance club melted away. The interior of the Williams-Pond living room came into view. The four of you were sitting on the couch in front of the television, a bad reality show playing at full volume. You rested a bowl of custard on your lap, all of you dipping cod fish fingers into it to recreate the first dish she consumed (and enjoyed because there were many she ate and despised) when she regenerated into her eleventh face.

“Yeah,” the Doctor nodded. “It’s okay.”

“What are you all doing?” Ryan questioned in reference to the food the four of you were sharing.

“We,” The Doctor prepped for the inevitable confusion/disgust. “Are eating fish fingers and custard.”

“You’re eating what and what?” Yaz gasped while Graham quietly gagged.

“Fish fingers and custard, I’ll have you know, is an absolute delicacy!”

The Doctor turned her back to them with a mask of indignation. Really, she just wanted to have a moment to herself before the storm that was about to happen in front of them. Every moment after that dance was one more moment towards the last day the Doctor had with you. Your time together was almost like a hill. The journey up was long, arduous, but from the top, you feel invincible—all it takes is a single misstep for you to tumble down the other side.

“If I had a restaurant,” The Doctor mumbled with a mouthful of fish fingers. “This would be all I’d serve.”

“Yeah right,” Amy scoffed. “You running a restaurant.”

“I’ve run restaurants before. Who do you think invented the Yorkshire pudding?”

Rory chuckled at first, but then his face loosened with realization. “You didn’t.”

The Doctor held a fish finger covered in a massive dollop of custard. “Pudding yet savory. Sound familiar?”

The four of you were meant to observe the black cubes that were scattered around almost an entire year ago. In all that time, they’d done nothing but end up as paperweights or something to throw into the trash when you don’t have the space anymore. After day 113, you had about given up on trying to figure them out in favor of maintaining your sanity.

“Mr. Pond,” Amy took the bowl from the Doctor’s hand when it was practically empty. “Come help me put these away?”

You saw her plan before it was even fully in motion. Amy wasn’t as slick as she liked to think, but she was definitely as persistent as she made herself out to be.

You hadn’t told the Doctor how you felt yet. In that time, though, you’d gotten better at being around him without your tongue becoming lead in your mouth. Every so often, you’d fumble through a conversation by the skin of your teeth, but those interactions were becoming far and few between. You’d even gotten back into your routine of going at each other’s throats, only to you, it felt less feral and more playful. You were happy with what you had with him, platonic or otherwise.

Regardless of your contentment with your relationship with the Doctor, you knew that Amy was not. She took any and every chance she got to let you know that you needed to get it together and tell him. If there was even the possibility of a moment where she could get the two of you alone, she manipulated the scene so that she had the two of you right where she wanted you. At that time, she was forcing Rory and herself out of the room so they could “clean the dishes together” as if it wasn’t an easy, one-person task. Most times, though, those manipulations ended in failure. Either you chickened out or the Doctor couldn't stand by you long enough for you to get a word out.

“Well,” The Doctor said with an abrupt jump off the couch. “I should get going. I told Kate that I would discuss the cubes again with her soon.”

“Do you have to go just yet? I mean, the cubes haven’t done anything, right?” You pretended to be blasé about it, but you really wanted him to stay a few extra moments. “And they still have a couple contestants left if you wanna, you know, finish watching before you have to go.”

The Doctor looked like he was contemplating his next move before returning to his place next to you. “Alright, I suppose I can stay until the end of the episode. You know, I’m really starting to see the appeal of these reality TV shows. They’re all so... real! With real people and real things that happen to those real people!”

You sucked in a large breath through your teeth, “I hate to break it to you, Doctor, but most of those shows are scripted. The people are real but…”

The Doctor’s face practically fell, and a pang of slight guilt filled your system, “Really? Even the American one with the dancing children and the mean lady?”

“I think the trauma from that show was real, just not the drama.”

“Oh, look at you,” The Doctor rejoiced with a clap. “Rhyming! I must be wearing off on you, aren’t I? Next thing you know, you’ll be making those puns you hate so much.”

“Oh, shut it,” You giggled, pressing your shoulder to his in a show of affection. “I don’t hate puns, I just hate yours.”

“So you say, but I think that you’re starting to like starshine!” The Doctor surmised.

If you admitted that you really were starting to like that nickname, the Doctor would never let you hear the end of it. If he found out that it made your heart beat just a little bit faster, he would boast until something else gathered his attention, then continue once he remembered. Sometimes you weighed the cost of having to live with the bragging against without, just so you could hear the nickname just a bit more. Pride overruled your choice in the end.

“Did you really invent the Yorkshire pudding? Or are you just messing again?” You asked out of genuine curiosity and a hint of attempted diversion.

“No, I really did! I also made the popsicles but some child from California beat me to the patent,” The Doctor’s tone got surprisingly serious for a beat. “I still hold a grudge against Frank Epperson to this very day.”

That same desire to learn more about the Doctor reappeared after its short-lived dormancy. Instead of the interest in the Doctor’s sad past, you wanted to know the small things. All the times the Doctor said something outlandish, you would brush it off as another one of his idiosyncrasies. Now, you would be happy with any little piece you could get. “What else have you done, huh? What? Were you D.B. Cooper too? Banksy?”

“I actually was Banksy, yes, so you can be sure that these cubes weren’t me.”

Graham gasped, “You weren’t kidding about that?”

“Seriously?” You gaped. “We’ve known each other– what? Eight years now?”

“And what a wonderful eight years it’s been!” The Doctor exclaimed, trying to keep the sadness at bay.

Despite having spent so much time together in the past year, what with the cubes and all, you knew that the Doctor was starting to miss the three of you. He was beginning to understand that your adventures wouldn’t be as frequent as they had once been. Adulthood, real adulthood with bills and jobs and responsibilities, crept up on you. You weren’t able to drop everything at the sound of the TARDIS’s engines to galavant across alien planets. It sucked, but that was just the reality of your situation.

That being said, you were a little bit okay with the cubes appearing on Earth. It meant that the Doctor wasn’t popping off in his box to fly away for however many months, only to return with the offer of meeting Stevie Nicks in the 70s. He was there, present, with all of you in all your adulthood glory. He was impatient as all hell during your time together, but he stayed. Even if it was just for a year, which in the grand scheme of his life was nothing more than a blip, it meant a lot to you.

“And in those eight years you didn’t tell us any of this?”

“Well, who knows?” The Doctor shrugged. “Maybe one day I’ll tell you all of it. Maybe even get into my time as a ghostwriter for Nancy Drew! And at one point the Rainbow Magic series but please do not give that information to anyone.”

“Don’t worry I won’t,” You laughed. Your hand inched towards the Doctor’s, and from the corner of your eye, you could see that the Doctor noticed. His hand remained where it had been and stayed there when you put yours on his. “And I would really like to hear all of it one day.”

The Doctor’s fingers stilled in yours but didn’t make a move to retract them. You watched as they shifted beneath yours. His thumb brushed against the back of your hand, leaving a trail of warmth in its wake.

You’d fallen into the trap that Amy and River had set for you. Both of them telling you that the Doctor had feelings for you made you believe it too. So did how you and the Doctor danced together that night at Club Tredecim. When he relaxed in your arms, when you felt the beat of his hearts against your chest, it felt right.

You considered that you were deluding yourself; love can do that to a person. But even if you were wrong, you would rather be that than live with the thought of what might have been, even if it would hurt like hell. You wanted to choose to love the Doctor, and you hoped that if he felt the same, he would choose to love you back.

“Listen, I-” But you didn’t want to talk anymore. Maybe the term 'now or never' was obsolete when you're a time traveler, but...

Your lips just barely ghosted the Doctor’s. They were soft, warm, and completely different from how you thought they’d feel. They also weren’t moving.

It was incredibly difficult to peel your lips from the Doctor’s. Not because you loved the kiss, even though you did- but because you already knew what you would see when you pulled away: the Doctor, his face contorted in an expression of shock, confusion, and the emotion that broke you as much as it might him, sorrow.

The Doctor’s mouth did that thing, the thing where it bobbed like a fish. You used to love that face. It meant that you were able to catch the Doctor with something that not even he could predict. And to see it right there in front of you meant that he didn’t see this coming. It meant that he didn’t feel what you felt. You made a mistake. This was wrong. You were wrong.

“I-” You could feel your heart trying to crawl up your throat. “S-Shit, I- I thought that- I wasn’t- Fuck, I’m so sorry-”

“Y/N, plea-” Why did it hurt more for him to use your real name?

“No, don’t! D-Don’t, um, I- I should go-!”

You were scrambling in every sense. You were struggling to rip the blanket the four of you shared from your body. It clung to you, the fabric sticking to your skin like a fucking parasite. When you finally managed, you couldn’t even jam your shoes on without almost tripping over the rug while doing it. And all the while, you were just saying words in no particular order. Whatever came to mind first, you said it. It didn’t matter if it made sense. Nothing needed to, because nothing did.

“W-Wow, so, I’m just- Gotta- I should- I’m so sorry,” The tears had already reached your chin, but you didn’t even remember feeling them until one dropped onto your hand. You frantically wiped it off with the sleeve of your jacket that you were heaving on. “I knew I didn’t- Why would I deserve it-?”

“Hey, wait, don’t say-”

“I should’ve just left it alone- Shit! Where the fuck are my keys?” You cried out.

“What’s going-” Amy came out from the kitchen following the sudden eruption of noise.

“Sorry!” You babbled so that Amy didn’t have enough time to take in the situation. “It’s, um, work emergency!”

“What-? But-”

“Gotta go, I love you! Amy! I love you, Amy!”

You didn’t wait for Amy’s reply but heard her shout at the Doctor through the door, “What did you do?”

The isolation of your car only brought you mild security. You didn’t feel any kind of safety until you sped down the street, further and further away from Amy’s house and the fucking blue box parked out front. Even looking at her, the roof especially, was like looking at a treasured photograph, scratched and yellowed with age.

You knew you shouldn’t have been driving in those conditions. People got into accidents over lesser things than the inability to see through tears. You slowed to a halt in an empty parking space by the pavement. You felt bad for whoever lived in the houses surrounding you because if they looked outside their window, they’d see someone with tears streaking their cheeks. Someone hunched over the wheel while trying just to get a proper breath into their lungs.

Colors began to blur together, like sidewalk chalk in the rain. You couldn’t see any shapes through the screen of your tears, and the lines of the book you were trying to read were nothing but black blobs. Eventually, you just gave up trying to hold them back and slammed the book shut.

You squeezed your eyes tightly to push the building salt water out faster. If you forced them out, maybe you could be done and over with this crying fest. Even though people didn’t often come to the lake at this time, there was still the risk of someone deciding to have a sunset date. The last thing you wanted was for some people to walk up on you having a breakdown. It wasn’t even finals week yet, so you had no excuse, really.

The lake was always the one place on campus where you felt safe. You always sat in the pink chair because it gave you the best west-facing view for when the sun went down.

You could think there. Breathe. And you needed nothing more than to take several thousand deep breaths after the afternoon that you had.

The day hadn’t started so horrible, but when you were meant to meet up with your partner, you’d been ambushed with a conversation that you really didn’t want to have in the student lounge. When you had asked to go somewhere perhaps a little quieter, he refused, saying that if you did, you would find some excuse to rush off. You’d say that you had a huge essay due in the morning that couldn’t wait or that your professor’s office hours were going to be over soon. Worst of all was that he might have been right.

You’d hoped that going to your favorite spot might give your mind a little more clarity, but it was still cluttered with the exact words from him that repeated over and over.

“Excuse- Ow!”

One word from an unknown source, and you sprang into action. The book you’d closed was suddenly launched at your unsuspecting target. You didn’t even see his face before he crumpled to the ground after a direct hit to the forehead. You only caught a quick glimpse of gray hair before your adrenaline died, and reason was resurrected.

You’d just fucking hit an old guy.

Regret flooded through you in an instant. “Oh, my- Shit! Fuck, I’m so sorry, sir!”

You ran towards the man to help him up, but he was already rising to his feet.

“It-It’s alright!” His voice was heavy with an accent. What was it? You were so discombobulated, but it was right on the top of your tongue.

“I’m sorry, I-I just got scared!” Was it Irish?

“It’s quite fine, I assure-” Or one from Yorkshire?

“I didn’t hurt you too much, did I?” Geordie?

“No, not at all,” Oh. Oh, how could you miss it? Your own best friend was Scottish, you should’ve been able to spot that from a mile away. “Really, I’m alright. Are you?”

You blinked blankly, “What?”

“Well, I was coming here to see the, um, the sunset. A colleague of mine who works here says it’s one of the most gorgeous sights they’ve ever seen,” The man explained with a few fatigued huffs. “Wanted to see it for myself, but… I heard you crying.”

“Oh,” You said before breaking off into a groan. You slapped the palms of your hands to your face, the tears that weren’t even dry yet seeping into your skin. “Oh, that’s so nice of you. And I hit you with a book, oh my God!”

“Really, I’m fine,” The man brushed off some of the sand from his jacket, which you noticed was torn at the left shoulder. He saw you eyeing the rip, “Ah, this. I was– well, I was trying to grab some nuggets from the cafeteria. Apparently the volleyball players on the women’s team are pretty aggressive when it comes to those.”

You hesitantly snickered, “They’re pretty vicious, aren’t they?”

“Indeed,” The man agreed. He pulled out a black wallet with an ID inside. He presented it to you for a few seconds before stuffing it into his pocket. “Dr. John Smith. I lecture at St. Luke’s University in Bristol. I’m here for a conference but just, you know, wanted to see the lake.”

“I bet you didn’t expect to be attacked twice,” You murmured guiltily. “I’m Y/N, I’m just a student here. I should let you-”

“You never answered my question.”

You noted a slight shaking in his legs while he uprighted himself. “Do you wanna sit down?”

Dr. Smith mentally weighed his options but eventually followed you to the array of painted wooden beach chairs dug deep into the sand.

“So,” Dr. Smith started once he was seated in the yellow chair next to yours. “What’s got you so upset?”

You bit your bottom lip while trying to think of how to say this. You were never the best at these kinds of things, but you hoped that talking to someone with no prior opinion of you– if you overlooked throwing a hardcover novel at his head– might make it a little easier. “I don't know. Nothing big, just… love? I guess? Or lack of, maybe?”

“Ahh, love,” Dr. Smith sighed dolefully. “I know all about that.”

“Yeah?”

“Of course,” He shrugged passively. “I’ve lived a long life. I’ve fallen in love many times, but… Well, there’s always one that sticks with you, isn’t there? Sometimes, it’s your first love and others will be the one you lost. But there’s always one.”

You weren’t sure if you had had that yet. Yeah, there were romances that you looked at fondly, but you couldn’t pinpoint the one that stuck out above the rest. If you had to, you might say this one. So far, it’s been the one that left you the most hollowed out once it was over. You hoped that would change someday.

“I’ll tell you my tragic love story if you tell me yours.”

You instantly wanted to put the words back into your mouth. This man was a complete stranger to you. You couldn’t just say shit like that and expect him to–

Dr. Smith was laughing. And it didn’t seem like he was shocked by your retort, not at all. He was laughing like someone who would expect this kind of behavior from you, not some ignorant to your dry wit. “O-Okay! I’ll take you up on that.

“There was someone. A long time ago. We both traveled together, you see. At first, we didn’t like each other. We were always fighting, driving our friends who traveled with us to the brink of madness. But then that was because we were so similar. Too similar. The two of us might as well have been mirrors of one another. And that… I think that made both of us terrified. More so myself than them- I'm not so sure about that now- but that was because I knew they could hurt me… One look at them smiling the brightest I’d ever seen them and I knew. So, I started running. Then they did too. We ran in opposite directions to the point that when I finally decided I could turn around… I couldn’t see them anymore. I’d lost them.”

“That sounds like something I would do. Well, I guess it sounds like something I have done,” You swallowed the cry that was building in your throat. Dr. Smith was waiting patiently next to you, but you could sense his anticipation. “Running, I mean. That’s kinda how my last relationship ended. And some of my other ones too. We were close to getting real, I think. We were talking about after graduation and life and it just… I started throwing myself into my work. He said that I was doing it because I was afraid. That I was a coward, because I was trying to get away. Then, he said that…”

This was the blow that took you down. “That I deserve to be alone.”

You knew it wasn’t true, but it didn’t mean that those words didn’t try to tattoo themselves into your insides. The more you kept repeating it, the faster the ink dried. You were so desperately trying to stop yourself, but it wasn’t like the human brain was adept at listening to commands.

“And I know he was just mad-!”

“Doesn’t matter,” Dr. Smith interrupted. “No one deserves to be alone. No one deserves to be told that. Whoever told you that is a complete idiot. A total moron! Should be ashamed of himself!”

“But he wasn’t wrong. At least, not about me being scared.”

The truth was that this was a pattern, and one you didn’t even mean to continue. Most times, when you got like this, the relationship fizzled out on its own, like a campfire that didn’t get poked enough. This was the first one that ended up in an explosion with fiery debris. You’d felt horrible on all accounts, regardless of whether or not the end was incendiary, but you didn’t have to confront yourself with your inadequacies until someone pointed them out. You didn’t have to force yourself to come to the conclusion that you really were terrified.

“I had a friend once who said that love was a choice,” Dr. Smith began. His eyes remained fixed on the water, but you could see he was more present than he wanted to appear. “She had said it to my star… Well, suffice it to say that I spent a very long time trying to figure out what that meant. If I could have chosen not to love them, I would. It might have saved us both the pain. But then, I understood. You choose love despite the pain, because there always will be in the end. As dark as that sounds, it’s true. And I’ll always… I’ll always wonder how things might have been different if I made another decision.”

That was really a beautiful way to look at it… But was it actually that easy? It didn’t feel like the entirety of love could be defined as something someone can choose. When you were with some of your exes, you didn’t feel like there was any decision to make. There was only one option in front of you, and it was one you were comfortable making time and time again.

Maybe you just hadn’t found a love worth choosing yet. That was a nice thought.

“Do you still love them?” You spotted the lack of a ring on his left hand.

Dr. Smith smiled wistfully, “I do.”

“Do you know if they’re still out there?” You wondered.

“I haven’t seen them in years,” Dr. Smith shook his head woefully. “They’re gone from my life.”

“Mmm,” You hummed. “Not gone then.”

“Excuse me?”

“They might still be out there. By some beautiful miracle, it might not be too late to reconcile. I know it’s probably just hopefulness but… Hope is a good thing, isn’t it?”

Dr. Smith smiled, reaching his eyes, “That it is.”

“Do you know what I think?” You asked gently.

“What’s that?”

“I think that if life ever hands you that miracle and you get the chance to see them again, you should tell them– nothing else! You should tell them ‘I choose to love you.’”

Dr. Smith pulled his eyes away from the lake to look at you. His eyes were questioning, but you would understand that his words were not. He said back, “I choose to love you.”

“Exactly!” You nodded excitedly. “They’ll understand, I just know it.”

You heard someone shout your name from the direction of the dorms. You recognized it as your roommate’s but made no move to respond. She could wait one moment.

“Aren’t you going to go see your friend?” He asked with a slight head nod but not looking away.

His question went unanswered. You rolled out of your chair and dropped to your knees beside the arm of his chair. For a moment, you stared at him. You look in every curled lock of wild gray hair, every wrinkle, every speck of color inside the blue of his eyes beneath those bushy brows. Your hand fell delicately against the apple of his cheeks, sunken slightly from age. His skin wasn’t soft like it had been before, but it was a welcoming sensation all the same.

“It was him,” You whispered. “Wasn’t it?”

"Maybe," Dr. Smith- the Doctor acknowledged.

"I should've noticed," You chastised yourself, your lips curled into themselves to keep a sob inside. It didn't work. "I-I should've noticed that it was him. I know him… I just… I should have known it was him that day and maybe…"

The Doctor brought his hand to yours. It felt so different from the Doctor you knew, but then, you'd never touched this Doctor's hand. You wouldn't ever really know what it felt like. You'd have to be content with only the idea of how it might have been to hold his hand. "Give yourself some credit. You were hurting."

He was so much older. You knew the Doctor had completely different faces when he regenerated, but this… If it weren't for the eyes, and if it weren't for the gift of memory, you never would have even known. You might have lived the rest of your life thinking that this man was no more than a stranger passing by. Perhaps the Doctor just got his timing wrong again.

You had seen the Doctor’s previous faces. You remembered how all eleven of them looked, and this one never appeared in TARDIS files. This face was new. He must have regenerated into him. And that meant there were probably years worth of things that he’d gone through. You wanted to know what those things were, who he’d met, but you needed to know if he had been alone through it all. You couldn’t be there, but you prayed upon the stars that he forsook his stubbornness and offered companionship to some lucky girl despite everything you said.

“He looks so tired.”

You heard your roommate again, this time more insistent. You couldn’t stay in this moment forever. That’s what she said, without having to say more than your name.

“Just… can I hear him say it before I go?”

You would never see this face again, and you only wanted to hear him call you, “Starshine.”

Trying to bite back a choked, pathetic mixture of a laugh and a cry and failing, you lowered yourself back into your seat to the exact position you’d been in before. Even when you slipped back into the ignorance of the memory, the imprint of his cheek against your hand wouldn’t leave you. You turned your head to see your roommate with bags from the cafeteria. In an act of kindness, she said she’d grab you both dinner and some ice cream to dig into from the convenience store. “That’s my friend. I should–”

When you looked back to tell Dr. Smith you needed to go, the yellow beach chair was empty. You didn’t see him anywhere nearby, and there didn’t even seem to be any trace that he was there with you at all; it was like he had just up and vanished.

“Hey!” Your roommate greeted you. Her eyebrows furrowed at your concerned expression. “Everything alright?”

“Um,” The fresh tears that weren’t there at the time dripped into the corner of your mouth. The saltiness tasted like regret. “Y-Yeah. Fine. So, what’d you get?”

“That lake…” Graham muttered. “I know that lake. I’ve seen it before.”

“Gamma Pictoris,” Yaz stated, turning to the Doctor. “You accidentally took us there when we were trying to get to Gamma Pictoris. We went to the wrong place. This place.”

“It was just as beautiful as they said it was… The TARDIS took me there,” The Doctor began, not looking at anyone. “Right before I transformed into this face… I guess it was a good thing I was already going through the regeneration process because that book really hurt!”

She was laughing, but there was nothing comedic in her smile. There was centuries of grief for the love that she never got to save. When she looked at the face before this one, she saw it in his smile too. All that mourning, but never really knowing what for. Because the worst part about losing you was that there was no finality. She’d lost so many before you and more after, but she knew where they were. Even if it was in death… or abandonment, she knew.

In some wry, cruel fashion, the Doctor never had an ending with you.

“Guess she took me there to remind me.”

“Remind you of what, Doc?” Graham asked.

To keep looking for that ending. “I have to make a phone call.”

The Doctor rushed to her feet, making a swift exit while the emerging image of Manhattan appeared behind the glass.

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iamnotoriginalphil · 1 year

Text

Keeping it Under Wraps (13th Doctor x f!Reader)

Synopsis: When you're cast in the role of the Doctor's wife, hiding your feelings suddenly become a whole lot harder

Words: 10.2k

Warnings: teeth rotting fluff

The lobby of the hotel was light and airy, huge windows letting in the bright sunlight, sparkling off mirrors and crystals. A floral scent lingered in the air, and the soft bubbling of a fountain helped to give the place a calming feeling. Marble flooring and high ceilings had your head spinning. You had never been somewhere so fancy, and it was taking your breath away.

You reached out, snagging the Doctor’s coat sleeve. She was looking down at the sonic screwdriver, brow wrinkled. The TARDIS had picked up an odd reading during your supposed day off and she’d immediately set off to find the source.

Posing as guests of the resort had sounded almost relaxing, if not for the certain danger you were sure you’d find yourself in sooner or later. You hoped there would be time for a swim at least.

She turned, flashing you that smile that always made your head fuzzy. You couldn’t help yourself when she smiled like that, agreeing to all kinds of things you knew you shouldn’t. There wasn’t much you wouldn’t do for her, if only she’d smile at you like that.

“Come on,” she said.

She grabbed your hand, tugging you along as she approached the front desk. The woman standing behind the counter looked up, giving you both a bright smile. You returned it, doing your best not to look nervous. You knew the Doctor could get you in anywhere, but every time you still felt the flutter of your heart in your throat.

“Good afternoon,” the receptionist said, “how can I help you today?”

“Hiya, we have a reservation. Should be under the Doctor,” she said. Out of sight you saw the flash of the sonic, pointing up at the computer from under the counter.

“Of course. I’ll just need to see some ID,” she said.

The Doctor thrust her hand into the pocket of her coat, rummaging for longer than most would have found necessary. Pulling the familiar psychic paper from the depths of her pocket, she flashed it at the receptionist, smiling proudly. She tapped on the computer, turning back with a smile.

“Wonderful, looks like your suite should be ready. Killone will show you up,” she said, “we hope you enjoy your stay.”

A tall man with green skin bounded over. He took the bag from your hand, lifting it with ease, and took the keys from the receptionist. Leading you over to the bank of elevators, he gave the two of you an appraising look, eyebrows shooting up. The Doctor wasn’t looking at you but gazing around, eyes flitting over other guests. You thrust your hands into your pockets to keep from fidgeting, not sure what the look he was giving the two of you meant. You didn’t want to think about the possibility that he was about to expose you for lying. You didn’t need this adventure over before it had even begun.

The elevator ride was long, taking you almost to the top of the building. The Doctor was looking at every single button. You could almost see her mind working, wondering what she was thinking.

The doors opened, leading into a long corridor. The carpet was plush and there were few doors. Killone led you to the one right at the end of the hall. He tapped the key card against the reader and pushed the door open.

Your breath caught in your throat. A large bank of windows looked down onto the pool, a balcony outside with loungers and a dining table. A fireplace was set into the wall, flames already flickering despite the warm air outside. The sofa was large enough to be a bed and faced a screen on the wall.

Following Killone further in you saw a huge bed dominating the bedroom, white sheets and comforter obscured under what looked like rose petals in the shape of a heart. A bottle of some kind of alcohol in an ice bucket was cooling to the side, two champagne flutes waiting. You couldn’t tear your eyes away from the heart on the bed, a sinking feeling in your gut telling you something you didn’t want to hear. Killone placed the bag down at the end of the bed and turned to look at you, smiling.

“I shall give you your privacy now,” he said.

The Doctor was inspecting the bottle of alcohol, nose scrunched up as she read the label. She’d rolled her sleeves up and you had to do your best not to stare at her forearms. The Doctor with rolled up sleeves was a very specific form of torture you’d yet to figure out how to deal with. Your face heated up when you noticed Killone watching you.

“Thank you,” you said.

“And congratulations,” he said, “we are so glad you chose us for this special occasion.”

He left without another word, but it was enough to have the Doctor’s head snapping up. The door closed with a quiet snick, leaving the two of you there. Her eyebrows had drawn together and it looked at if she was trying to solve a problem.

“Why would he offer us congratulations?” she wondered out loud, “we’re just staying in their hotel. Nothing special about that.”

“I think they’ve put us in the honeymoon suite,” you said, gesturing to the heart shape on the bed. You couldn’t even look at her as you did. You were sure your cheeks were hot enough to fry an egg on. The universe had to be playing some kind of cosmic joke on you. There was no way this would happen otherwise.

“Now why would they do that?” she said.

She put the bottle back and walked over, bending close to inspect the flower petals. The sinking in your gut had been right. Killone giving you privacy, calling it a special occasion, it was all painting a picture that was not going to be possible to ignore. You were watching your cover story grow more complicated before your very eyes.

“Doctor,” you said, doing your best not to show her you were panicking, “they think we’re newlyweds.”

She turned to you, eyebrows shooting up, and there was a faint blush high on her cheeks. You looked down at your feet, finally allowing your fingers to twist together. Pretending to be a newlywed with the Doctor, it had to be some sick joke. You weren’t going to survive it. Your heart would be destroyed by the time you left. You wanted to ask to call the whole thing off now.

But then she’d ask why and you’d have to tell her exactly how you felt. You couldn’t imagine anything more mortifying than admitting your huge crush on her. You knew there was no way she could return your feelings. Someone as amazing as the Doctor didn’t feel that way about people like you.

No, you’d just have to grit your teeth and bare it.

“Right, well, shouldn’t be too hard,” the Doctor said, “we’re good pretenders. Easy peasy. Nothing weird about it. Might even be better. People love talking to newlyweds, don’t they? I always talk to newlyweds.”

You looked up from your feet. She was looking back at the bed, hands on her hips, but her face was turned away from you. It was hard to get a read on her when you couldn’t see her face. It was like she wore every emotion in her eyes and you’d been learning to read them since you’d met her. You wish you knew what she was thinking.

“So you’re okay with that?” you asked, doing your best to keep your own worry under wraps.

“Course,” she said, whirling around, large smile on her face, “why wouldn’t I be? We’re going to have fun, right?”

“Yeah, so much fun,” you said, “like a proper vacation.”

“I promised you a good time,” she said.

You smiled at her, hoping you were being normal. She grinned back and your heart fluttered. You loved being on the receiving end of her smiles. No one had ever made you feel as special as the Doctor had, and every smile made you feel like you were important to her. So much joy in such a small person practically bursting out in your direction. It warmed you the entire way through.

“I’m going to scan the room, see if there’s anything in the walls,” she said.

Her coat brushed against the skin of your arm as she strode into the living room, holding her sonic out in front of her. You stared at the back of her head, blonde hair ruffled as she ran her fingers through it. You pressed your lips together, having to force yourself to stop watching her.

This trip was going to kill you.

“I’m going to go… uh, shower,” you said, needing a moment alone where she couldn’t interrupt.

You shut the door to the bathroom, flicking the lock. Resting your head against the cool surface, you let out a long breath, trying to keep your cool. you could do this, you could keep your heart under control. You could.

You turned, ready to have a shower, a cold shower. Taking up your entire field of vision was a massive bath, more of a hot tub. Your mouth turned dry and for a moment all you could see was an image of the Doctor in that bath, waiting for you to join her.

Groaning, you buried your head in your hands. You had to get a handle on yourself. You couldn’t fall to pieces now, all because of a silly crush, when there was clearly something more important going on.

Emerging from the bathroom a while later you found the Doctor sitting on that insane sofa, elbows resting against her thighs as she watched the screen. She flipped to another channel. You sat beside her, not so close that you could feel her body heat, but close enough for her to notice you were there.

“Anything good on?” you asked.

“They only show internal channels here,” she said, without looking away from the screen, “bit weird. People usually don’t go on vacation without a bit of telly. It’s all advertising for stuff you can do here. Thirty seven restaurants. Seems a bit excessive if you ask me but no one ever does. Got a gift shop, though. Love a good gift shop.”

“Did the sonic find anything?” you asked.

“Not a thing. Which is quite frustrating. Whatever is going on is well hidden, which suggests they’re a bit professional. Hate professionals messing with things. Makes it so much harder,” she said, wrinkling her nose, looking disgruntled. Your heart did a little flip. That cold shower was not doing the wonders you’d been praying it would.

“Speaking of restaurants, we’re booked in at one tonight,” she said, “complimentary with the suite apparently. Quite swish, that.”

“Good thing I packed my fancy clothes then,” you said.

Her eyes flashed over to you, tongue sliding along her bottom lip. You felt your cheeks heat up, breath stuttering in your chest. Her head titled to the side, eyes sweeping over you, before abruptly turning away. You swallowed past the lump in your throat.

“Do you want to go investigating?” you asked, needed to stop being alone with her for a moment. Being in a room set up for romance alone with the Doctor was becoming unbearable and it had barely been an hour.

“Brilliant idea. You’re always so brilliant.”

She jumped up from the sofa, already half way to the door. All you could do was follow behind her like a lost puppy. You snatched up the keys on your way out, knowing the Doctor would forget them.

You kept yourself pressed against the back wall of the elevator on the way down. You were finding it hard to trust yourself around her right now, something shifting in you with the change in plan. As the doors began to side open, she spun around, grabbing your hand, fingers laced together. Her face was so close to yours, breath ghosting over your skin. You froze, staring at her, unable to look away. Her lips turned up in a smile.

“Come on, wife, let’s go exploring.”

Hand tugging you out of the lift, you almost tripped over your own feet. Your head was spinning, trying to catch up with everything that had happened. Five seconds and she’d destroyed any sanity you had left.

She waved to the receptionist as you passed. You flushed under the surprised look she gave the two of you. You ducked your head, not wanting to meet her eye. You could only imagine what she was thinking.

The sunlight hit you as you stepped outside. The pool was large, beautiful blue water sparkling, with deckchairs littered around the edge. You could see people swimming, floating on their backs, drinks in hand. A bar was on the side, the bartender shaking up a cocktail. You tilted your head back, soaking up the sun.

“It’s so beautiful,” you said, for a moment forgetting the Doctor’s hand in yours.

“Yeah, beautiful.” Her hand squeezed yours. You looked at her, finding her head already turned towards you. Those eyes were so big you could fall into them. Your heart was loud in your ears. She tugged on your hand until you stepped towards her, just slightly. Something in her eyes shifted and she tilted her head towards you, as if about to tell you a secret.

“Hi.”

You jumped, your heart now thudding for very different reasons. You turned, finding a smiling woman standing there, big grin on her face, sun visor throwing shade over her. You did your best to smile.

“Hello,” you said, trying to bring yourself back to reality.

“Y’all must be new here, I haven’t seen you round before,” she said, sounding like she could have been from Texas.

“Just arrived today actually,” you replied, surprised at how quiet the Doctor was staying. She was usually the first to jump in to conversation with new people. You didn’t think it was a good sign she was staying quiet now.

“What brings you here?” she asked, looking over your shoulder.

“We’ve just gotten married,” you said, the lie sour on your tongue, “heard this was the best place in the galaxy for a honeymoon.”

“You heard right,” she said with a laugh, “Deter and I came here for ours. Of course it wasn’t as big back then, but it’s perfect for our 25th anniversary.”

The Doctor tightened her grip on your hand until it was almost painful. You shot her a look, trying to ask her what was wrong. She was staring at the woman, seemingly ignoring you completely.

“You must join us in the sky lounge tonight,” she said, “there is no better view for the firework display.”

“I’m afraid we have dinner reservations,” you said.

“And of course you’ll be wanting your privacy, I’m sure,” she said with another laugh, “Deter and I certainly were when we were in your shoes.”

You had to get your flush under control or you’d be spending your entire time there with a hot face. You were going to be fielding similar comments as long as people thought you were newlyweds. You dragged your eyes back to the Doctor.

“Come on, love,” she murmured, finally looking at you too.

You gave her a soft smile, letting her tug you away from the woman before she could ask you anymore questions. She tucked some hair behind her ear, cuff winking in the sunlight. Her hand was still in yours but no longer hanging on with all her might. For a moment, just a short moment, you allowed yourself to believe this was real.

Moving past the pool you followed a trail out into a garden, shaded by trees, and full of flowers. Bees buzzed in the air. The Doctor paused in front of a flower bush, letting your hand go to pull the sonic from the depths of her pockets. Turning in a slow circle, she scanned the world around you, continuing to look more and more disgruntled with the readings.

“Nothing,” she said, almost pouting.

“Be a bit weird to have some evil hide out in the garden, wouldn’t it?” you said, “it’s usually more basements in our line of work.”

“If you start assuming where evil hide outs will be then you start missing things and then they can sneak up on you. I hate when things sneak up on me,” she said, “it always leads to trouble.”

“Does anything ever not lead to trouble with you?” you asked, flashing her a smile when she snapped back to you.

“Hey, watch it,” she said, pointing the sonic at you, “I can do no trouble. I’m ace at not getting into trouble.”

“Uh huh, and were you just waiting to show me that or…?”

You weren’t expecting her to lunge at you, hands outstretched. Her fingers found your sides, merciless in their tickling. You were laughing, tears streaming from your eyes and you pushed uselessly at her shoulders. You could hear her laughing too, not letting up.

Slowly, tortuously slowly, she began to stop, hands resting on your waist. Breathing hard you stared at her. She was staring back, the smile on her face bright. You hadn’t realised how close she was before, doing everything you could to push her away from you, but now it was as if you were wrapped in her. If you moved just a touch you could kiss her. Your eyes slipped down to her lips.

You stepped away from her, looking away. Your gaze settled on the flowers, bright blue and beautiful. Leaning forward, you plucked one from the bush. You held it out to the Doctor.

“For my beautiful wife,” you said softly, hoping she’d missed your moment of weakness.

“Beautiful?” she asked, reaching for it. Your fingers brushed together as she took hold of the stem.

“Well, I wouldn’t have married you if I didn’t think you were.” You winked at her.

You didn’t let her take the flower, knocking her hand away to tuck it behind her ear. She smiled, dazzling, more beautiful than the stars. You breath caught and you had to turn away before you did something stupid like actually kiss her. You only had yourself to blame. Flirting would only get you into trouble at this point.

You spent the rest of the afternoon exploring the grounds. Her hand was warm in yours, and you loved the way she pointed at things, excited to share them with you. You found yourself watching her more than the surrounds. No matter how many amazing places she took you, she would always be your favourite view.

Back in the room, your bag had been unpacked and there was fruit laid out on a platter. The Doctor stood over it, picking at it. You looked away when she popped her finger in her mouth, sucking the left over sugary juice from her skin. You pressed your lips together, turning to look out the window, down onto the garden you’d just been walking through.

“I’m going to go get ready for dinner,” you said, fleeing back into the bathroom.

Another cold shower and another chance to remind your heart that none of it was real. You were friends, you were just friends, and that was great. If she did anything else, then she was oblivious to the effect it had on you. You refused to read too much into it. You couldn’t read too much into it, or else you’d get seriously hurt.

You slipped your dress on. Reaching around, you struggled to zip yourself up. Sighing, you turned to look in the mirror. Your fingers scrabbled but you couldn’t bend yourself into the right shape.

“Hey, Doc,” you called, stepping out of the bathroom.

The Doctor had changed in your absence. Leaning forward, she was looking in the mirror as she adjusted her bowtie. You paused on the threshold, eyes skimming over her. A suit. You hated every single time she wore a suit. She looked so good in it, it made you a stuttering mess. It left no room for thoughts in your head beyond how good she looked.

She caught sight of you in the mirror. Head snapping around, she looked at you with wide eyes, a slow smile spreading over her face. You shook your head, trying to gather your thoughts again.

“Could you zip me up?” you asked.

“Course I can,” she said, bounding over.

You turned, presenting your back to her. Gentle hands pushed your hair over your shoulder, lingering on the side of your neck. Your pulse jumped at her touch and your breath caught in your throat. The zip began to rise, knuckles softly grazing against your skin. You turned your head, just slightly, wanting to catch a glimpse of her.

She was closer than you were expecting, breath ghosting over your cheek. Her eyes had lost their twinkle, down to a soft smoulder, fingertips brushing over your skin. You caught your bottom lip between teeth, scared of making some kind of noise that would ruin the moment. Her eyes dropped down to your lips. You watched her throat bob.

She stepped back from you, hands falling to her sides. You blinked, taking in a deep breath, turning back to the room proper.

“Perfect,” she said, her voice so quiet, little more than a breath.

“Thank you.”

“Right, well, dinner,” she said, bouncing away from you. She looked in the mirror again, tugging on the tie one last time before turning towards you, “the reviews say it will be good, although I think they wrote their own review. Might not be that good. I hope it is. Did you try the fruit out there? Great fruit. Fruit is fabulous, isn’t it? We should have more fruit on the TARDIS.”

“Doctor?” you said, interrupting before she could continue rambling.

“Hmm?”

She turned away from the mirror, looking at you then immediately away again. You ignored the light flush on her cheeks.

“Let’s go to dinner.”

She was silent the entire way to the restaurant. You weren’t sure what to think about that, used to her chatter always in your ear. It was making you nervous, scared you’d overstepped a line. Maybe you shouldn’t have asked her to zip up your dress. Usually Yaz was your go to for help of that kind, but alone with the Doctor you’d had no other options. You didn’t want her feeling uncomfortable with you.

“This place is really nice,” you said, unable to stop yourself when you stepped into the restaurant.

“Only the best for my wife,” she said, and just like that your heart was beating double time and you felt yourself melt. With a hand resting on the small of your back she led you over to your table. She held out the chair for you and for just a moment you forgot this wasn’t real. You wanted it to be real so badly it was like a physical ache in your chest.

“So, what do you think?” you asked, glancing over the menu.

“I think you look beautiful tonight.”

Your cheeks heated up and when your eyes met hers it was like you turned molten. She was looking at you like the universe was being born within you. It was intoxicating but it was making your mouth grow dry.

She turned, looking up at the waiter to place her order. You followed suit, glad for the excuse to stop looking at her. You played with your knife, pushing it out of place then straightening it again. This night was already making you feel insane.

The food look amazing and luckily whatever seemed had made the Doctor shut up had worn off. She kept chattering on as she ate, not giving you a chance to interject. It was nice, being able to listen to her again, back to normal. Her voice always helped to calm your nerves.

“And a complimentary dessert to celebrate your new union,” the waiter said, placing what looked like a slice of red velvet cake between the two of you. There was a heart drawn in chocolate syrup on the plate and two spoons. Your cheeks heated up but the surprised grin on the Doctor’s face had you smiling too. Her joy was always so infectious.

What you didn’t expect was for her to hold out her spoon, cake heaped on it, extended over the table. You froze, staring down at it.

“Come on,” she said, “open up.”

You wrapped your lips around it, sliding the dessert from the spoon. It was soft and sweet and you hummed. There was a flush high on her cheekbones as she pulled the silver metal from your mouth. She scooped up her own bite of cake, shoving it into her mouth. A bit of icing clung to the corner of her mouth and you had to fight against the urge to lean over and swipe it away. Her tongue darted out, catching it. You had to swallow past a lump in your throat, turning your attention to the slice of cake. It was hard to focus after that.

Her hand was on the small of your back again, guiding you back into the lift. It was driving you mad, having her touching you in ways she hadn’t before. It wasn’t anything but chaste but it was making you feel like you had butterflies in your stomach.

“Right well, I’ll take the sofa and you can sleep in the bed. You humans need more sleep than I do anyway and the bed looks comfy. I’m sure the sofa is too. Been meaning to get a sofa, a nice purple sofa. I could sit on it. Imagine me sitting on a sofa,” she said, turning to you once you’d closed the door.

“I don’t have to imagine it. You were doing it earlier. You looked good,” you said without much thought. Your brain catching up with your mouth, your eyes widened and you had to fight the impulse to clap a hand over your mouth. She smiled at you, as bright as the sunrise.

“So you’ll take the bed and I’ll take the sofa and tomorrow we’ll go talk to some people,” she said.

“Or you could just sleep in the bed as well.” You really had to start thinking before you opened your mouth. Her eyebrows shot up and there was a pleased look on her face.

“Really?” Her voice held such hope you couldn’t say no now.

“Well it is massive so there’s easily enough room. Plus they might think it’s weird if housekeeping comes in and sees we didn’t share the bed. Newlyweds and all,” you said, not able to look at her.

“If you’re sure.” You weren’t used to her sounding anything less than sure with you.

“Of course.”

You watched her kick off her boots, the same boots she’d been wearing the entire time you’d known her, and shrug out of her jacket. As she turned back to you, you realised that you were frozen, just staring at her, watching every movement. She tucked her hair behind her ear, her cuff flashing at you.

Rather than ask her to help unzip you, you chose to struggle, contorting yourself into weird shapes to reach the zipper. You left the dress hanging in the bathroom, wearing an old t-shirt and pair of shorts. The Doctor was sitting on the edge of the bed, staring off into space.

“Which side do you want?” you asked.

She jumped, eyes snapping up to you. You gave her a soft smile, wondering what was going through her mind. You were used to her being distracted but not within her own head. It threw you off your equilibrium, the way almost everything had on this trip.

“Left?” She scrunched her nose at you, “I always trust left. Brilliant side is left.”

“Sure, sounds good,” you said, sitting down on the right side of the bed.

You slid under the covers, sheets cool against your skin. You sat, waiting for her to join you. She hadn’t gotten undressed, still in her trousers and shirts, and looked a little unsure as she climbed in beside you. The bed was huge, easily putting space between your two bodies.

You lay down, head on the pillow, hands crossed over your stomach, staring up at the ceiling. You felt her shift, glad for the space. It kept the awkwardness from the air. Or so you told yourself.

“Thank you for bringing me here,” you said, “it’s been lovely so far.”

“You’re welcome,” she replied, her voice quiet.

The lights dimmed. The atmosphere became charged. You froze, breath catching in your chest, any relaxation disappearing. You became so aware of her and all that space shrunk until it felt as if she was only a millimetre from you. Something crackled between you, making your fingers tingle. You could feel her in the darkness.

She shifted, the quilt tugging on you. She sighed. You clenched your fists, holding as still as you could. You tried to slow your breathing but it was hard when her warmth was so close to you. Squeezing your eyes shut, flashes of the day ran through your mind. Her tongue catching the icing on her lips, fingers grazing along your spine as she raised your zipper, your hand in hers. You could feel the ghost of her touch.

You turned your head in the dark, searching for her. Blonde hair spread out on the pillow almost shone through the dark. Chest rising and falling, she was staring back at you. Your tongue darted out, wetting your lips. She caught her bottom lip between her teeth, eyes darting down to yours. Heat spread through your body.

“Still okay?” she asked.

“Of course,” you replied.

But still, neither of you looked away. You couldn’t catch your breath. She reached over, tugging one of your hands between you, threading her fingers through yours. With her other hand she brushed some of your hair away from your face, fingertips lingering on your jaw. You lent into her touch, unable to stop yourself.

“You should get some sleep,” she said, “humans need plenty of sleep.”

“Yeah,” you agreed, words lost under her touch.

“Sweet dreams, love.”

“You too.”

You closed your eyes as her fingers retracted from your face. Her hand still in yours, you slipped into sleep at some point, not noticing when thoughts became dreams.

Waking up, you were enclosed in warmth. You sighed, snuggling back into it, hoping to catch a few more hours of sleep. You were warm and sleepy and you had nothing you needed to do that day.

Arms tightened around your waist and a soft breath puffed over the nape of your neck. You hummed, burying against the body behind you. The familiar scent of electricity and stardust surrounded you, helping to lull you back into a doze.

Soft fingers brushed against the bare skin of your stomach where your shirt had ridden up in your sleep. A nose buried into your hair and legs tangled with yours. You’d never felt so safe, so comfortable in your entire life. All you wanted was to stay there forever.

That was, until you realised who was holding you.

You stiffened. A familiar voice grumbled something unintelligible, arms tightening around you. You had no idea what to do, plan after plan running through your brain to get out of the situation. A supple body pressed against your back and a soft groan reverberated in your ears.

“Is it morning already?” the Doctor asked. Her voice was still rough from sleep, almost slurring on her words. Your heart missed a beat.

“Yup.”

“Suppose we should get up and investigate then.” You could almost feel the brush of her lips on your skin as she spoke.

“Yup.”

You sat up, her arms falling from your body. Glancing down at her, she kept her eyes closed, hair adorably ruffled, nose scrunching up. Her hands snagged on your shirt again, holding you in place as she eventually blinked those eyes open. First thing in the morning Doctor should be illegal. Your heart was beating so hard in your chest you were worried it would crack your ribcage wide open, spreading your feelings out in front of her on full display.

“Did you get enough sleep?” Her eyes did that thing they did whenever you knew she was worried about your wellbeing, widening then scrunching together. You nodded and she let you go.

You swung your legs over the side of the bed, not able to look at her. You were finding it difficult to concentrate when she looked like that, all rumpled and soft. Keeping your back to her, you stood.

“Should we check out the pool today?” you asked, “you promised me swimming.”

“Sun and surf,” she said, “well no, not surf, but the closest thing they have to surf. Might even be salt water. Still can’t surf on it, not without trying really hard and they try to stop you in places like this so no surf. But swimming. And sun. Can’t forget the sun. You like sun right?”

“Yeah, Doc, I like sun.”

Only, you thought maybe you’d made a mistake once you got down to the pool. You sat down on a deck chair, tugging your shirt off over your head. The Doctor, on the chair next to yours, snapped her head around to you, eyes widening. You lay back, doing your best not to cross your arms over your chest or cover yourself up, aiming to appear normal. Her eyes dragged over your body, drinking in your exposed skin. Her eyes flitted away once she noticed you watching her, scanning over the people already in the pool. Late morning and there were plenty of people about.

“We should go swimming more often,” you heard her mutter under her breath. You weren’t sure what she was thinking, but you knew it was a thought not directed at you.

“Right, drinks, we should have drinks. People have drinks at the pool. Drinks.” She stood up and turned on her heels, striding off to the bar. You watched her go, eyes sweeping over her coatless form. You loved that coat, but there was something intimate about seeing her out of it. It reminded you of late nights and soft voices.

“Well aren’t y’all the cutest couple.”

The woman from yesterday had taken the Doctor’s deckchair without you noticing. You smiled at her politely, not sure what to say to that.

“I didn’t get a chance to introduce myself yesterday,” she said, “I’m Eria, and over there is Deter.”

She pointed at a portly man doing a breaststroke through the crystal clear water. He waved at her when he noticed her looking at her. She waved back.

“How long have you known your wife?” she asked.

“It feels like forever,” you replied, not having to lie about that.

“You’re very lucky, you know. She looks at you like you invented sliced bread,” Eria said.

“Maybe I did,” you replied without much thought.

You were watching the Doctor at the bar, talking to another one of the guests. She was gesturing wildly, the liquid in her glass threatening to spill over the sides. So much for bringing you a drink too. And yet your heart felt like it was growing too big to fit in your chest.

“More importantly, you look at her like the sun and moon rise with her,” Eria said. You felt your cheeks heat as you looked back at the woman in the deckchair beside you. She was giving you an indulgent smile, clearly enjoying flustering you.

“They might,” you replied, turning your eyes back to her. She was looking back at you, a soft smile on her face. Your heart did a somersault and your breath caught in your throat. You couldn’t look at her when she smiled at you like that.

Eria chuckled, giving you a knowing look. Your flush deepened.

“Don’t worry, it’s nice to see such a sweet young couple so in love,” she said, “it gives us oldies some hope.”

“Sometimes I worry I love her more than she loves me,” you said, not able to stop it from slipping from your lips.

“You have nothing to worry about. I’ve never seen a couple more besotted with one another than you two,” she said, “other than me and Deter.”

You looked back over at the Doctor. She was finally making her way over to you, both hands full with some kind of fruity concoction. She sat down at your knee, passing you one of the chilled glasses. Your fingers brushed together and you had to suppress a shiver.

“Hiya,” she said to Eria, before attempting to catch the straw in her drink.

You felt mesmerised by the sight of her tongue chasing the bright blue straw around the glass. Her lips wrapping around it and the sound of her sucking had you looking away, fingers fiddling with your own straw. If you looked at her again you felt you might combust.

“I was just saying to your wife here that it’s so nice to see a young couple so in love.”

The Doctor sputtered, coughing up her drink. You banged her on the back, leaning forward to reach. Her cheeks were red and she was staring at the woman with wide eyed horror.

Placing a hand on her cheek, you turned her face until she was looking at you, hoping to make it look as if you were worried, while shielding her reaction from Eria. While your heart sunk, you lent closer.

“You okay?” you asked.

“Brilliant. Tip top. Never better. In perfect condition. Absolutely spiffing.” She went silent when her eyes met yours and the flush on her cheeks deepened. You took the drink from her hand, putting it down on the concrete ground.

“Perhaps we should practice breathing before you have any more of that,” you said.

Her smile sent butterflies ricocheting through your chest. You looked away, not able to handle the whiplash. Her hand on your knee drew your attention back to her. You offered her a smile, hoping she couldn’t see the conflict within you.

“All good?” she asked, voice soft and kind and caring, the exact voice that was always your undoing when it came to her.

“Perfect,” you replied.

She tucked a strand of your hair behind your ear, leaning closer to you. You sighed, skin almost sparking from her proximity. There was a crease between her eyebrows as they drew together, eyes darting over your face. You smiled, placing your hand on the small of her back as you lent towards her.

“Promise,” you said.

Her touch slipped to your shoulder, fingers brushing over bare skin. Your gasp was entirely too audible, especially for how close she was. She tilted her head as her fingers did it again, nails dragging along your skin. You shivered, wanting to press close to her, wanting those fingers on every inch of your skin.

“I really must insist you join us for the fireworks tonight,” Eria said, breaking into your bubble.

You lent away from the Doctor, your face feeling on fire. A matching blush seemed to be rising in her cheeks as she turned her head away, looking out over the water. Her hand fell from your shoulder and yours slipped from her back. Suddenly it felt as if there were miles of space between you.

“I’m sure that would be lovely,” you said, voice strained.

“Wonderful,” she said, standing, “we’ll be in the sky lounge from about eight. Don’t be late.”

The Doctor reclaimed her deckchair. You fiddled with the straw in your drink, not able to look at her anymore. The silence felt heavy and all you wanted was for it to disappear. The Doctor’s chatter would have been a comfort but it appeared as if she was lost in thought.

“There’s something about her I don’t like,” she eventually said, “too friendly. It’s fishy. Not at all what I would say is innocent behaviour.”

“I don’t think being friendly is suspicious behaviour,” you said.

“Why was she so insistent on us watching the fireworks with her? And why does she keep interrupting us? Two days we’ve been here and she’s found us both times. No, there’s something weird going on here,” she said.

“Well, did you sonic her?” you asked, not willing to be drawn into a conspiracy with her.

“No.” She crossed her arms and pouted like a child,

“So we’re going to go check out the fireworks, right?” you asked.

“Yes.” She was still pouting.

“Do you want the rest of your drink?” Sometimes it really did feel like babysitting with her.

“No, I’m going to go exploring,” she said, standing up.

“Do you want me to come?” You weren’t sure you should leave her on her own. She seemed to be in a mood, and Yaz always said she shouldn’t be left alone when she’s in a mood.

“No, you stay here and be all…” Her eyes swept over you. You watched her throat bob before she turned on her heels and marched away without another word.

“Alright then,” you said to yourself, “guess I’m on relaxation duty.”

You didn’t see her again for the rest of the day. Once you grew tired of the pool you headed back to your room, ordering some food to pick at as you waited on her. She’d been right about the tv, only internal channels available. You couldn’t focus on them, feeling jittery without knowing where the Doctor was.

As the hours passed, you ordered more food to the room, feeling the need to keep up appearances. Eventually, as it became clear the Doctor wasn’t coming back, you went to go get changed into something appropriate for the sky lounge. Shimmying into a pair of tight jeans you began to look through the shirts you’d brought. You had no clue what was right for fireworks.

“You’ll never guess what I found.”

You shrieked, whirling around, clutching a shirt to your chest. The Doctor froze mid-bound, her eyes widening and cheeks flushing. Her mouth fell open, gaze sweeping over you. You felt yourself grow warm, not able to move while she was still looking at you.

Her mouth snapped shut and she whirled around, clapping a hand over her eyes. You squeaked, pulling on the shirt in your hands.

“What’d you find?” you asked, trying to keep your voice steady.

“There’s some interesting readings coming from the sky lounge,” she said, “I knew there was something going on up there. Too friendly.”

“If you want to say I told you so, you can,” you said.

“I never say I told you so. Well, almost never. Practically never. Only when it’s really necessary.” You couldn’t help but smile at her chatter, the familiarity rushing over you, replacing all the anxiety that had been climbing in you all afternoon.

“Come on,” you said, pulling her hand from her face and dragging her back towards the door, “let’s go investigate.”

Her hand tightened around yours, holding on the entire way up to the sky lounge. Stepping out, your breath caught in your chest. The windows looked out onto a beautiful night sky, showing off the grounds you’d wandered through the day before. Sometimes it was hard to believe places as beautiful as this actually existed.

You heard your name called. Turning, you found Eria waving at you, the man she’d pointed out as Deter at her side. The Doctor’s fingers tightened around yours. You lent towards her.

“Play nice,” you whispered.

She scrunched her nose at you but didn’t argue which you took as a win. Tugging on her hand, you led her over to your new friends who may or may not be evil. The Doctor’s arm wrapped around your waist, holding you close to her, almost protectively. You hated how much you liked it.

“I’m so glad y’all made it,” Eria said, “wasn’t I just saying how much I hoped they make it?”

“Yes, dear,” Deter said.

“We couldn’t miss the fireworks another night,” you said.

“I really like fireworks,” the Doctor said.

“We thought you might. You seem like the kind of people who would enjoy fireworks,” Eria said.

“Where’s the best spot to watch them?” the Doctor asked, her arm tightening around you.

“We know just the place,” Eria replied.

She led you around the sky lounge to right in front of the windows. The Doctor positioned you so you were standing in front of her, arms around your waist, chin resting on your shoulder. Your blood was thrumming in your veins and your heart was beating hard. You threaded your fingers through her’s, both keeping her in place and anchoring yourself to the moment.

“This is perfect,” she said, her breath ghosting over your pulse point. You shivered, and you knew she could feel it from how still she went. You lent back against her, feeling her defrost.

“Didn’t I tell you they were such sweet lovebirds?” Eria said.

“Yes, dear,” Deter said.

You could practically feel the Doctor thinking, the gears almost audible in her brain. You turned your head, nose brushing against her temple. Her arms tightened around you before relaxing again. She turned her head towards you, eyes practically smouldering. The rest of the world began to fade away.

Eria called your name, placing a hand on your shoulder. Reluctantly, you turned towards her. She had that knowing smile on her face, the one that had you feeling embarrassed all over.

“Careful dears, or you’ll miss them,” she said.

“Don’t want to miss the fireworks,” the Doctor said.

“No, never,” you replied.

You felt her chuckle reverberate through her chest more than you heard it. You had to stop yourself from turning to look at her again. That would be a dangerous game for you. Your heart wouldn’t be able to take it.

“Look,” she whispered in your ear. You couldn’t suppress the shiver that went down your spine again. She had to be playing with you. There was no way she didn’t know the effect she was having on you.

She pointed out the window. You followed her finger, waiting a moment before colour exploded against the dark sky. You gasped, your hands tightening around her. You could almost feel her smiling beside you, her excitement palpable. You couldn’t be sure if it was because of the fireworks or because of what she thought might happen with the fireworks.

She pressed closer, her body flush against yours. That familiar scent of stardust was surrounding you, invading your senses. She was all you could focus on. The fireworks were little more than blurs in your vision, your whole attention focused on her. Nothing else mattered.

You turned your head, wanting to watch her watch the fireworks. Her eyes were already on you, looking at you with more wonder than when she looked upon the universe. You weren’t sure what to do with that look directed at you.

“I’m glad we came here,” she murmured.

“Me too,” you replied, unable to feel anything other than grateful for this moment.

“I’m glad it was you I was with here,” she continued.

“Who else would it have been?”

She shook her head and you could have sworn there was more space between you before. Her face was so close and her eyes were so big and you could feel her breath on your skin. You felt yourself begin to lean towards her, wondering if you were still awake. This would be a cruel dream.

And then the entire room shuddered. If not for the Doctor’s arms around your waist, you would have fallen. She held on tight, head snapping around to look for the source of the disturbance. You clutched at her shoulders, righting yourself, head still swimming from what had been about to happen.

A pop of colour in your peripheral vision brought your attention back to the firework display. It felt as if a lifetime had already occurred since the beginning of the show and yet it was still going on.

“Don’t mind us, you lovebirds,” Eria said, “nothing wrong with a bit of PDA on your honeymoon.”

You blinked, looking over at her. Deter had his back to you, seemingly looking out over the skyline but something felt wrong. It was beginning to feel like everything you were looking at wasn’t real. Just a tinge of uncanny valley to the whole thing. You shivered, pressing back against the Doctor.

“Didn’t you notice that?” you asked her.

“Notice what, dear?”

“The ground moved.” You couldn’t understand what was happening.

“I felt that way on my honeymoon too,” she said with a far off look on her face, “every time he kissed me I could feel the Earth spinning.”

“The Earth?” You shook your head. Nothing was making sense.

“I’m sure a kiss from your wife will make it all better,” she said, “it always did for Deter.”

“Why do you keep trying to make us kiss?” the Doctor interjected before you could respond, “and why did you want us to come watch the fireworks so badly? And why were you so friendly to us? You don’t even know us. Unless you do. Do you know us?”

“How would we know you?” she asked, that smile still perfectly in place.

“You know my name,” you said, something clicking in your brain, “I never told you my name.”

“Good catch,” the Doctor said to you. Her arms were still around you and her body was pressing against your back, and it was making the whole situation so much harder to get your head around.

Eria’s smile turned brittle, fragile, as if it was about to snap. Deter slowly turned towards you, blank faced, almost robotic in his movements. You flinched back, the Doctor steadying you. She slipped around you, gently pushing you behind her. You always got a little thrill whenever she protected you.

“See, it’s been niggling at the back of my brain all day. Quite annoying. I did a scan up here earlier and I’ve been trying to figure out what the readings meant. But I think I’ve finally gotten there. Because the thing is, this place doesn’t really exist. I mean the hotel exists, certainly, but it’s not a hotel, not a real one. It’s something more. But only in this room. Am I right?”

“I’m sure I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Eria replied, that grin beginning to stretch her face further.

“At first I thought it was something to do with the fireworks, that they were going to do something, but they were just an excuse to get us up here. So what’s going on up here? You may as well tell us, we’re already here,” she said.

“We just want to make your honeymoon special,” she said, “just like ours was.”

“Is it something about us kissing? Is that?” she demanded.

“We only want you to have a special honeymoon,” she said.

“What happens when we kiss?” she asked.

And it was all becoming too much for you. The Doctor talking about kissing you, the ghost of her arms around your body, her protective stance. Your knees were turning to jelly. You didn’t even care what the conversation was about anymore.

“You’ll be happy,” Eria replied.

“Something began to happen when we were going to.”

The Doctor spun around, holding her sonic up. She scanned over the room, over you, and over herself. Looking down at the readout, her eyes widened. Her tongue darted out, wetting her lip before her gaze met yours. You tilted your head, asking her what was wrong. Instead of answering she whirled back towards Eria.

“You’re trying to harness love?” Your cheeks heated at her words.

“You’ll be happy,” Eria said, “there’s no harm in it.”

“You’re stealing love from people,” she said, sounding outraged, “without permission. What I want to know is what are you using it for. There is no more powerful energy in the universe than love.”

The smile over her face broke, the expression like broken glass. You flinched back, able to feel the way it cut through your skin and your defences. Without thinking, you reached out, clutching at the Doctor’s coat, stepping closer to her. You could feel how tense she was, hard as a rock under your touch.

“We need it more than you,” Eria said, not bothering to keep the friendliness in her voice, “you can survive without it.”

“Have you been doing this for 25 years?” you asked.

“Good question,” the Doctor said.

“It is of no significance,” Eria replied.

“We already have a problem with you trying to do this with us, but if you’ve been doing this for 25 years already, we’re going to have a big problem,” she said, “what are you using it for?”

“To feed.”

Her smile stretched too wide, far more teeth showing than should be in any person’s mouth. Her skin began to tear along the corners of her smile, darkness creeping out. The Doctor pushed you back a step, flinging her arms out to keep Eria from getting closer to you.

Something grasped the back of your shirt, tugging you away from the Doctor. You cried out, trying to see what had a hold of you. Another blank face was staring at you. You tried to pull out of their hands, a whimper falling from your lips. The Doctor grasped the wrists, yanking the hands off you.

“No one has the right to steal love,” the Doctor said, “not without permission, and not under my watch.”

In a familiar gesture, she pointed her sonic at the bar. Sparks flew and the ground shook beneath your feet. She grabbed your hand, running from the room as the roof began to cave in. An angered cry followed your retreating bodies. Crashes followed you from the room.

Your feet clattered against the stairs as she dragged you down, down, out into the lobby. The entire building was shuddering around you and siren was starting up, loud and insistent in your ears. She tried saying something to you, but you couldn’t hear her over the noise. You shook your head.

Stumbling out of the front doors, you coughed. Dust and smoke were beginning to coat your lungs and all you wanted was to get a deep breath of clean air to clear it. The Doctor wasn’t relenting, pulling you along as she sprinted. There was a pain blossoming along your ribs and you were gasping for air.

With a hand between your shoulder blades, she shoved you through the TARDIS doors. You caught yourself on one of the pillars, bending over as you tried to suck air into your lungs. She brushed past you, rushing over the console. She mumbled under her breath, staring at the screen.

“Did you,” you gasped out, “just collapse a building on her?”

“The technology was completely embedded within the entire building,” she said, “to disable it I had to destroy the entire thing. They knew that.”

“How did they know who we were?” you asked.

“I don’t know,” she replied.

The sound of the TARDIS taking off filled the silence. You slumped against the pillar, your breathing beginning to even out again. Your mind was still reeling from the last twenty minutes, and all the implications of it. You wouldn’t be able to keep your mouth shut about it.

“Sorry about your luggage,” she said once she was no longer piloting.

“What?” You had no idea what she was talking about.

“Your luggage was still in the hotel,” she said, “I’m sorry about losing it.”

“It’s just stuff,” you said, “I can get more.”

“Oh. Good.”

She lent back against the console, crossing her arms over her chest. She wasn’t saying anything, and you weren’t saying anything, and somehow that was making the entire thing worse.

“Doctor?” you said, not able to handle the silence.

“Yes?”

“What would have happened if we kissed back there?”

The question had been burning through you. If the machine was there to steal love, then surely you would have been the only one effected. You were the only one with any love to give.

“You heard what Eria was saying. It would have stolen the love right out of us, collected it somewhere for them to feast on later,” she replied.

“Yes but, wouldn’t we both have to be in love for that to work?”

“That was the implication,” she said, taking a hesitant step towards you.

“So they would have known something was wrong when nothing happened after we kissed,” you said.

“Would nothing have happened?”

She was standing right in front of you, looking at you with those eyes, so big and wide. Her mouth wasn’t smiling the way you always like it to, and her hands were thrust deep in her pockets. You swept your gaze over her, mouth growing dry, not sure what she was implying.

“Well, if we both had to be in love…” you trailed off, not sure how to say what you wanted to say.

“Aren’t we?” Her voice had turned all soft and melty. She looked up at you from under her lashes and you couldn’t help the way your heart thundered.

“I didn’t think you… I thought… Are we?” You couldn’t collect your thoughts.

“I am,” she said.

“You are what?” You needed to hear her say it.

“I am in love with you,” she said as if it was the simplest thing in the universe.

Her hands landed on the pillar behind you, either side of your waist. Her body brushed against yours and despite the dust and grime on her skin, she’d never looked more beautiful to you. Your hands landed on her shoulders, not sure if you were going to pull her against you or stop her from getting any closer.

“I thought you knew,” she said, “I really didn’t think I was hiding it well.”

“You were hiding it very well,” you said faintly.

“Do you mind if I kiss you now?”

All you could do was shake your head.

The first press of her lips was soft, as if she was testing the waters. You made a soft whimpering sound, fingers clutching at her shoulders harder. Her body pushed against yours until you were pinned to the wall behind your back. Her tongue swept into your mouth and you thrust your fingers into her hair, wanting her closer.

Her hands finally grasped your waist, fingers on bare skin sending electricity over your skin. You moaned into her mouth and her grip tightened, as if trying to hold herself back. You sunk your teeth into her bottom lip and she groaned, pressing against you until one of her legs was inserted between yours. You hummed, tugging on her hair.

Lips trailing down your neck, leaving sloppy kisses in their wake. Teeth nipped at your pulse point, tongue soothing over it. Your head fell back, giving her more access as your eyes slipped closed. Her hands were everywhere, all over your skin and she was muttering into the curve of your neck between kisses.

You tugged her back to you, kissing her with a wild abandon you hadn’t known was in you. You wanted her as breathless as you were, as desperate as you were, as smitten as you were. She kissed you deeper, longer, as if the only thing keeping her alive was your kisses. You were more than happy to provide.

With a small whimper she drew back. Kiss stung lips spread into a wide grin and she was looking at you like you were the most wondrous thing in the universe. You wanted to pull her back into another kiss, but you were desperately gasping for breath, the heat of her skin melded to yours. She was so close and yet you wanted her closer, ever closer.

“I didn’t realise you knew,” you said.

“I didn’t,” she replied, “not really. Not until a bit earlier tonight. I mean I hoped, but I didn’t know for sure. I kept trying to figure it out. I think you were better at hiding it. Another thing you’re brilliant at. You’re so brilliant.”

You laughed, leaning back against the pillar and letting your head fall back. She was watching you now with a surprised look on her face but still shining out from underneath was the glee, that joy that seemed to be sparking from every cell in her body. You wanted to hold her for the rest of forever.

“I thought I was being so obvious,” you said, “this whole weekend has been hell trying to hide it.”

“Why were you trying to hide it?” she asked.

“Why were you?” you shot back.

“Good point.”

You tugged her forward, kissing her again, this time slowly, taking your time with it. And you did have time, plenty of it.

And really, that’s all you needed.

#13th doctor x reader #13th doctor imagine #thirteenth doctor imagine #thirteenth doctor x reader #doctor who imagine

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