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kkbardd · 8 months

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so uhh i got summoned to asurei court, if anyone's interested in my testimony papers, theyre down below the cut. (aka my whole take on how i believe their dynamic would develop in cannon)

asurei isn’t for everyone & its whole point is unhealthy dependence.. toxic yuri if u will.. anything resembling a healthy relationship would only be in one of the alt universes created by the 3rd impact 💀 rei and asuka both have what the other wants (whether it be the worth asuka puts on recognition of piloting skills or rei's desire to break from mindless obedience like asuka seems to do so easily.) They both hate and admire each other for this, and asuka specifically expresses this by lashing out at rei. asuka's whole relationship w lesbian comphet plays a HUGE role into all of this but let’s gloss over it for the time being. (now, with asurei u gotta get a bit delusional cuz cannon doesn’t give us much so from here on out is just my opinion on how it'd play out.)

in terms of rei's POV in this:

rei hates the attention they gets from men, and is especially disgusted by gendo's fake kindness. he sees rei as a replaceable doll and pushes yui's image on them. gendo has never actually seen rei for who they really are, and rei later begins to hate and despise not only gendo but themselves too. in the anime, rei is shown to have self destructive tendencies & suicidal ideation because not only are they constantly being replaced & having their memory wiped, but each time they forget any sort of emotion that they learn in the meantime. recall the scene in which rei, right after being "revived" and left with no memory, sees gendo's glasses. although they cant remember anything, its hinted that their "soul" still remembers and hates him. rei tries to break the glasses but in the end, they’re still unable to defy and break free from their situation. feeling frustrated and helpless, rei starts crying & remarks how this should be the first time they've experienced it but somehow it feels like its not. back to the present, reis acting very reckless in battle and basically using themselves as a meat shield. they're so full of self-hate, and seeing asuka's obvious inferiority to them just upsets them even more. why does she put so much worth on the one thing that acts like a plague to them? compared to these pointless test results on a screen, asuka has something so much more valuable. the ability to think for themselves, to not be someone's doll. asuka's inferiority is almost insulting. rei verbally lashes out at asuka in the elevator, showing defiance that they never knew they could produce. it felt almost liberating. they find that being around asuka gives them emotions that they've always longed for, no matter how ugly they may be. they soon find themselves seeking asuka out, and the inferiority that was once insulting became a means to control and keep her close. asuka, someone who was seemingly invincible and can roam free without care, has one weakness that causes her to crack and shatter from the slightest touch. and that weakness is none other than rei themselves. rei becomes possessive in a way that they've never known possible. so much so that a part of them starts to hate themselves, fearing they've become just like their abuser gendo. nonetheless, rei begins to value their life more. they become deathly afraid of dying & being replaced by some mindless clone that has forgotten everything they now know about asuka and themself.

now what is asuka doing in all of this?

asuka deals with a lot of comphet and its an integral part of her character, so much so that it doesn’t seem right to not mention it. but to quickly summarize, because of this she has a love-hate relationship with attention from men. she feels disgusted by it but gets extremely jealous when it seems like another girl might replace her. then comes rei. (now what most ppl don’t seem to notice is asuka didnt start off hating rei, she tried to be friends but ever since the beginning misato has ALWYAYS pitted them against each other. this of course led asuka to feeling threatened & seeing rei as an enemy. especially since it involves piloting ability, something that asuka sees as her whole point of living.) she begins to hate her because how can someone who is so good at piloting be so brainless and doll-like. that’s exactly what asuka was trying so hard to not become! in this aspect, rei's entire existence defies what asuka has tried so hard to believe in up to this point. her hate & inferiority towards rei is only made worse when she sees that they're not only being objectified by men, but are seemingly unbothered by it unlike asuka. rei is now constantly on her mind, and asuka starts to realize that what she's feeling towards them isn’t just hate. its around the time of the elevator scene that these confusing emotions and inferiorities are at their peak. right after this, asuka goes into battle & is ordered to be rei's backup. she defies this order but receives a mental attack from an angel that causes her to re-live all of her trauma & comphet issues. the person that saved her from this is none other than rei. at this point asuka is at an all-time low, and states that she'd rather be left for dead than saved by someone like rei. she’s still confused by her feelings towards rei, but right now her hatred and insecurity is taking priority. its right after this battle that her synchro rates plummet and she loses the #1 thing she based her life worth on. she then goes out to die in an abandoned building but is eventually retrieved by NERV. I believe that during this time alone, she’s also wallowing in her feelings for rei and coming to terms with a lot of comphet stuff, especially after that psychological attack. right after this the world like ends or whatever but lets forget that for now & extend time cuz the gays need it 🥰 .

rei and asuka at this point realize their feelings in one way or another, and there's a lot of tension in their conversations. asuka is at a very fragile point rn bc of all the stuff that just went on, and rei is unsure how to go about things, half due to their inexperience & half due to their fear of becoming like gendo. however, asuka realizes rei is acting different from before, and advances on them as a way of lashing out. but to her surprise rei is undefiant and actually willingly helpless in her hands. she feels a rush of superiority and is amused by how inexperienced rei is. she also realizes that unlike her previous experiences with men (like when she tried to kiss shinji but didnt want to see, smell, taste, or even feel it & had a mental breakdown afterwards lol ) she actually likes it!? the romantic/sexual affirmation that asuka has always wanted from men like kaji is being fulfilled by rei in a way that asuka feels completely in control & comfortable. she's not forcing herself or being objectified, but rather is taking the lead. this is something she never imagined possible before. and all of this is with rei to boot! the rei that, in asuka's eyes, has always looked down on her and been unobtainable is now melting in her hands like putty. there’s a sense of accomplishment she feels, which makes her want to push rei even more. she finally has authority and to make herself feel better, she takes it out on rei through advances like this. she goes further and further, and in an ironic way, uses intimacy as a form of self-harm. she feels shame and despises herself for doing such things with ill-intent, and with another woman at that. its a toxic relationship that tries to fill the hole in her heart, but only leads to a bigger one forming.

when asuka first advanced onto rei, they felt something unlike anything before. unlike when gendo would often touch their shoulder, rei didnt recoil from asuka's touch. rei also felt something similar to asuka, in that the person who always seemed unbound by anything in now giving them her undivided attention. the fact that this came from an act of anger didnt really bother rei, since they knew from the beginning that was one of the only ways to get asuka to even spare them a glance. rei would gladly become hated if it meant binding asuka to them. in a mix of touch-starvedness & unhealthy dependency on asuka, rei kept looking forward to any interacting with asuka, since it was what really made them feel alive. asuka slowly becomes rei's world and meaning for living, but they eventually realize that causes a great insecurity. asuka is independent and can go anywhere she wants if she feels like it. from rei's pov, asuka desperately wants attention from men, something that rei could never give her. rei's afraid that asuka will leave them, & to tie asuka down they play the role of a villain. rei keeps asuka feeling insecure by becoming what asuka envisioned them as, and slowly starts hacking away at asuka's Achille's heel. rei desperately uses the short time that asuka has given them to engrain themself into her, so much so that asuka would be nothing without them. rei cannot let asuka realize her worth for fear that she would leave them. rei notices that asuka enjoys seeing them helpless and plays the part, almost like a honeytrap. slowly tho I believe that rei starts to take control of the relationship in hopes of making asuka dependent on them.

Asurei is in no way a wholesome relationship, and ik that’s not for everyone.. my vision of a happy end for them would be both of them becoming comfortable in their relationship and finding that the actions they once used to express hatred for themselves and each other is now slowly becoming fueled by love and desire for each other. They form a very unhealthy co-dependence on each other, but for them it works. They cant envision a world without the other in it.

#asurei #i was so surprised i got summoned #am i seen as some kind of asurei-connoisseur #toxic yuri #thats all it boils down to

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danvillecheese · 11 months

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why do u think act ur age is fucked

[cracks knuckles] alright. essay time. you asked for it.

I’ve done a similar response to this before here and mentioned something else about it here but I’ll go over it again since those posts are both from a while ago. also bear in mind I haven’t seen aya recently bc I don’t like it. okay let’s get into it

[also im gonna preface this saying maybe i sound very pessimistic but im ranting and its just gonna sound like im complaining because i am. i mean no real malice by the way. im simply a person with a blog.]

first off. they don’t use the show don’t tell as well as they could. in the what might have been montage, sure, they showed potential scenarios and how phineas felt (very briefly) when isa stopped visiting his backyard but it just feels so rushed. I get that they only had like 11 minutes to show it but idk there has to be another way to write it. or just not have it at all idk its just from a writing point of view the whole episode feels rushed and out of place from everything else continuity-wise. why not use little easter eggs planted in the show beforehand? operation crumbcake? pharmacists? meapless in seattle? god theres so many episodes with evidence that phineas liked her back even if he didnt know. just. continuity!!!!

second. why did their friends not try something sooner. it’s not like they didn’t know. like phineas seems to be okay with saying “i wish! i am so in the friend zone there” in front of his friends (that quote alone makes me lose my shit but that’s a whole other point) so clearly they knew about phineas. and isabella also wasn’t quiet about it (source: pnf s1-4). they had like four years of high school to do something and they planned it the day isa left for college? nah its just the least realistic thing ever for me. also them being 18 is like yeah okay maybe the slow burn was worth it and theyre way more grown up (i love a good slowburn) but ohhhhhh my god SURELY their friends were getting sick of them dancing around each other. just me?

third. and I’m sorry to ash simpson but oh my god I hate the character designs like They Would Not Fucking Look Like That. it almost feels like it completely disregards their arcs during the original summer. like yeah child chub disappears over ur teen years but sometimes it stays a little longer! make phineas less twiggy!! make isa look more like her mother! (am i about to redesign them again? whoops)

four. and i know this is no fault of dan and swampy but the show was about to end anyways and yet the entire friend group was paired off into hetero ships?? get fucking real. none of those kids are straight. realistically, i know it was a different time and gay marriage wasnt even legal in the us yet so it wasnt all that common to have queer romance on screen let alone on disney channel but like i said, the show was about to end. what were the disney channel execs gonna do? cancel it? lmao

five. "I am so in the friend zone there." "we are guys. we do not talk about our feelings." WHAT!!! i cant believe this shit is real. these lines of dialogue are canon. what the hell. what kind of message does that even send to younger, impressionable viewers? if ur a 10 year old boy watching that (ok fine maybe that isnt gonna stick with you forever but listen) and you go 'oh its okay to just bottle everything up and not tell my friends about my feelings about anything ever' that is insane! thats not how things should go!! like i get the whole "im so in the friend zone" and yes, this also has to do with the era but like if they wanted to be a more progressive cartoon that kids look up to and enjoy maybe they just. shouldn't have put that whole conversation in.

i barely have any problems with the b plot. in fact id watch the episode just for the kazoo solo. because that plot lines up with the continuity. i can totally see heinz having bowling night with perry and carl and monogram every week! i can totally see perry and monogram retired! and carl running owca and getting payed for it! that all checks out! that one makes sense and works with the canon! if they got that plot so right how did they get the a plot so wrong?

i can answer this question: fanservice. its an awful word, i know. act your age is a fanservicey episode which is why i think it crashed and burned. mml season 2 is rooted in the same issue: doof is very present and takes away from the original plot of the show. like, the one he wasnt even in until the last episode of s1. slightly getting off topic but it is the crux of the issue. fanservice doesnt make for good storytelling. even if it brings in the big bucks. at its core, telling the story the way it should be told is the best one. even if it pisses people off. a good portion of the viewers will still appreciate whatever ending the creators come up with. and no, im not saying phinbella shouldn't have become canon, in fact i really like the ship and all their dynamics, i just think they went about it the wrong way.

as someone who's written and published fic about them getting together in different universes (granted, they were from when i was younger so its mildly terrible. take them with a grain of salt) there are a lot of other ways to tell that story canonically. honestly, i think the best way of doing it was to keep it ambiguous. dont tell that story. let the viewers pick their own ending for phineas and isabella. maybe they dont get together after all. who knows!

thanks for the ask! hope you had fun getting lectured <3

#phineas and ferb #phinbella #act your age #ask #this was fun you guys should ask me more stuff like this #dwampyverse analysis

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graciegoeskrazy · 3 months

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hello love, could you write something with healy reader and gabriette? like how their relationship works, maybe reader not liking her at first, preferring some other ex from matty and feeling abandoned by matty, and what matty and gabriette do so that reader feels better about them? thank you i love your writing

hc on reader and matty’s gf’s

matty healy + reader + gabriette (+others)

Warnings: language, parents dating, mention of anxiety, idrk, I did a hc my bad

A/n: oh hello random person I’ve never met in my life. Never met before mhm nope. Def not known each other since kindergarten. Nun uh nope. Anywhooo. Enjoy or I’ll find you. (Jokes on you. I’ve know this individual forever and they are the ONLY person in my real life that knows I write this shit and I completely forgot about that(I told them and a 1975 concert btw lmao) and I saw the request and forgot and i laughed at 2am bahahaha) jk love u bie

look at the photo they r so mamma y papa I casaanttttt

The thought of your dad and his love life makes u want to smile and puke all at the same time

You’ve never had a mom/mother figure growing up

That’s just how it was and you were fine with it

Your dad always told you ‘our family is perfect the way it is’

And you believed him

He had quite a few girlfriends when you were younger

None of which you really cared for

the most serious one in your opinion was with Gabriella

She felt like a true friend

And you were heartbroken when she left your dad

Understandably left your dad

I mean the guy was a mess

Even since those 4 years, u became more aware of how these ‘relationships’ really work

U learned what marriage meant and became fearful that your little family was going to change forever

After your dad and Gabriella broke up it wasn't long after that your dad found fka twigs

That one was a little more complicated

Just because you were growing up and becoming more mature and aware of things that were going on

She was nice to you, you cant deny

But your dad changed immensely while he was with her

He seemed to fall back into some of his old ways and that scared the shit out of you

The dynamic between your dad and you changed, not for the better

It wasn't that you blamed her for your father’s acting out

You blamed him and therefore turned on her too, never saying or doing anything mean, but just avoiding your father and in turn avoiding her too

But the moments where you did connect were lovely

There were just far too few of them

Your dad was even more heartbroken when they broke up which was surprising

You just let him be and made his emotions George’s problem

Charlotte didn't last long

you met her once at a party and they weren't even dating then

You technically weren't even aware they were dating until the news broke that they split

y/n | *1 attachment

y/n | since when did you have a girlfriend

y/n | yall like actually dated???

father healy | yeah lol

father healy | I didn't think it was gonna actually be anything so I never really told you

father healy | my b

y/n | dw.

y/n | sorry you have a complicated love life

father healy | its alright. Youre the only girl I truly need : )

y/n | awe u big ol sap

y/n | maybe you need to try someone whos not a model

y/n | or actress

y/n | just like a normal human ??

father healy | hm ok ill give it a thought

and then he dated fucking taylor swift

“What the actual fuck were you thinking?” You said storming into the dinning room.

“What?” All 4 boys said in unison.

You turnnd tour phone around and showed them all the page six article “Oh shit.”

“You’re dating DOCTOR TAYLOR ALLISON SWIFT?!?!?!”

George slapped him.“We told you to tell her before the rest of the world found out”

“You all knew?!?!”

‘Of course, we knew. We’re his best friend!” Ross said matter of factly.

“And I’m his own flesh and blood! There’s a pecking order!!!” Your gaze fell back to your dad. “You can’t do this.”

“What?”

“Date fucking Taylor Swift! She just got out of a 6-year relationship and you are the problematic guy on TikTok with a couple of good songs.”

“Damn, ok, thanks.” Adam said while bouncing his son up and down.

“You done?” Matty asked, getting serious and parental.

“No.” You said.

Matty gestured for yo to finish.

You thought for a moment and said “Fuck you.” You released a sigh you didnt know you were holding in. “Okay, now I’m done.”

He pated the seat next to him and you climbed over George like you’ve done since you were little to get to the seat. He moved a peace of hair out of your eyes and wiped your tears. “It’s not that serious. Yes, she got out of a 7-year relationship and I’m impossible to love so we’re taking it slow. Alright? And, look, I know you already met her but she would like to”

“Yes.”

All the boys chuckled.

Matty continued. “Listen, I want you to th-”

“Yes.” Matty laughed harder. “Dude it's Taylor Swift.” You said, mater-of-factly.

“Alright.” he sighed.

George pipped in. “Tell her where you’re going this weekend.”

Matty just deadpanned him, wanting to save that news for later.

No fucking way. You were about to lose your shit. “Where are you going this weekend?”

“... Nashville.” He said hesitantly.

“No, you are fucking not.”

“Yes, I am.”

“No, you are fucking not.”

“Yes, I am…And you can come to.”

You cried more. Omfg you were going to the Eras Tour.

He hugged you and kissed your head as you buried your face in your hands. Everyone laughed at your antics. Yu hugged him back and said thank you. “I need to stop making me learn about your relationships through social media.”

“Okay, I’ll try.”

Then they lasted for like a month lmao

When Gabriette came along, he actually told you before he told the internet!!!

You thought she was nice and super pretty

And plus you’ve never seen our dad this happy in a long time

Your dad had asked and made sure it was okay for her to come around during a party

You said it was no biggie but was slightly panicking on the inside

Just because you knew nothing about her

You stuck to George most of the night

Both men were fully aware of what you were doing - retreating into your shell - but didn't comment and instead let you be

You never liked parties in the first place and the added circumstances didn't help

She brought a dish and you coant deny it was killer

The music was really loud but she introduced herself and it was sweet

Matty noticed you later on a couch, staring out into space and sat down next to you

He excused himself from Gabriette and she understood what was happening

You assured your dad it had nothing to do with her or anything it was just the environment you were in

Which was absolutely believable and probably true

It was just your anxiety taking over in a space like this

Anywhooo the night winded down and it was now just you, your dad, and the closest inner circle

Including Gabriette

He pulled her aside again and told her that you were having lil sprouts of anxiety

She 100% understood and told him to do whatever he needed for you

He sat by you the whole night and she sat next to Charli

You became more yourself in the quieter environment

It was a fun end to the night

She spent a few nights over during winter break and you didn't mind

She was fun to be around

You both baked together which was a fun spur of moment things

It was never awkward

It was just fun with her

And you were glad your dad was happy.

#matty healy #matty healy x reader #matty healy x daughter!reader #x daughter!reader #matty the 1975 #the 1975 #matty x reader

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eyesontheskyline · 18 days

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god you are so right, im so glad you are writing for hotchniss bc this is the first time i’ve seen someone get into all the details about them and i am thrilled!!!! I cant believe i forgot about Minimal Loss… To me that is a situation where as a team of profilers they have to be on top of their game, and season wise, its the 2nd time a character gets tortured or hurt and the others witness it (reid first, then emily, 3rd time if u also count elle) So hotch’s reaction when emily gets beat up is just insanity to me. The man who never loses composure, who always keeps a stone cold face even when he is in the middle of a divorce, with tears in his eyes and feeling helpless- Like that happens then and we never see hotch losing composure like that during a case involving the team (ofc the foyet arc doesnt count) so yeah i totally see your point and i agree!!!

With them its like they are always toeing the line of something more, its a tension that i can always feel with them and while i respect people whose cup of tea isnt hotchniss, I dont get how they dont see the insane ass chemistry

Ahhh thank you, I'm having the best time getting back to them. I don't think it had ever occurred to me to ship at all until Minimal Loss, like I just wasn't around fandom at all, so I didn't watch things with that kind of eye? But that just sent me down a rabbithole and I'm still wandering around in the warren now lol.

I definitely think a lot of writing / directing / acting choices were made that point to Something More, and there's also just the twin-flame-ness of their characters. Like they're very similar in a lot of ways that I think would make them understand the parts of each other that would be hard to share with someone else, but also different enough (like, Emily is naturally tactile, and different things get under their skin) that it wouldn't be an inevitable disaster the way too-similar pairings sometimes are.

I think they have a lot to offer each other at any point in the timeline and that is VERY FUN FOR WRITING.

#hotchniss #emily prentiss #aaron hotchner #criminal minds #ask me

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kidfoundonstreets · 21 days

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LOVEBRUSH CHRONICLE. YOU LIKE?

ill try to keep it brief 1/20397

lovebrush chronciles is an otome game deisgbed by team/company I AM ACTUALLY NOT SURE DESPITE YOU SEEING IT EVRRYTIME YOU ENTER THE GAME HOLD ON neteaze games (passion of gamers) and it is about altnerate universes, time fuckery, and school life.

the game begins introducing itself as a regular otome school life sim (my condolences to the fans who fell for william first sight only to find out hes not an actual love interest trust me i see u i feel u) but then WHAM BAM!! just when u thougut ur girl best friend was lookin kinda cute she gets X_x in this summon circle and you jump in to save her only to find out youre now in a royal cage surrounded by people that needa sacrifice you to save themselves from their own doom. oh and youre not in your own world anumore good luck have fun

so now here goes the different plots and paths with the love interests. the way i playrd it was as they introduced it, which was ayn aklaid lars claerence. no cael route yet which rips me apart every night. the love interests seem to have consistent values throughout most universes despite all of their diferet upbringings which i find pretty cool considering schoollife and royaltylife are two completely drastic diferent things, and also i nejoy how mc is written with more character and an amazing design to match the rest of the beautifully drawn cast

on that topic the art is GORGEOUS. i have never seen such beautiful detailed art in a game before and i assure you it will not disappoijnt. the graphics and smoothness of the game are especially a great touch. THERES A MINI STORY FOR EACH CARD BTW SR AND UP ITS SO GOOD becasenit feels as if the creatoes actually put care and give a shit into whar theyre writing and drawing and even in little events the absolute quality and depth of the cast shines theough its just i cannot express how much you need to play tjis game if you like dating sims ITS FREE TOO??,×*#&@ IMSO SAD WHY ID OBEYEME GETTING SM ATTENTION WHEN THIS IS SITTJNGHERE HUH dont get me wrong i too was in that hole but trust me brother there is only one man worth it there and obeyeme sure as hell isnt gonna do it justice with its 200+ chapter peobably plotline

anywya its 11 pm and ibhave no idea how to organize this post so ill just go through the cast

he is my plaything

ANYWAY ayn is so maahh hes the stupid cat that sleeps on me at night HE USED YO BE MY FAV AND WAS EXACTLY MY TYPE OFF THE BAT ITS SO IRONIC HES MY LEASY LIKED NOW but hes still very good and god you need to see this

^^ bisexual dilemma

^^ HIS EMO PHASE

i like him as a side piece, he has a nice personality but it doesnt stick out to me as much as the rest but i heavily respect the enjoyers of him

Aigh now

HHHRHRGGGHWH HHRGGBW WHWHWBW W SLSOPE9282B3BDND BSHSJW W GHENRBR .R FJJGGW HJ W..B GHN.F. H . THROWSUP aklaid my dear my darling ! i lvouou my little STARBOY my favorite my self sacrificing devoted prince who acts soo nice but is the cause of his own decay. smooochh I ADORE HIM dude one time he almost dies and mc is like "i am so sorry" and hes smiling qhile saying "nono! this is the happiest ivebeen" GET THERAPY

lars is my favorite lesbian

im onsessed w him hes always fun no matter where he is and yet they still dont dumb him down the moments where hes serious only add to his character his charm is unexplainable his rizz unatainable you could never

my TRUE favorite lesbian

MY FABORITE MY FABORITE KY DAVROITE I WAS SO WORRIED HOW I WOULD ENKOY HIM BECAUSE SO KUCH WAS UNKNOWN BUT AHGGWDHHSHW HIS ROUTE HIS DEPTH EVERYTHING IT MAKES ME SO SADITS HWARTBREAKING DUDE "HAIR HOLDS MEMORIES" IM GONNA SOB INTO MY HANDS I CANT BELIEVE I LOVE A MAN NAMED CLARENARENCNEUXIHQBQ SHUTOROSHUSITP oh and he really likes cats :D

i have run out of images but cael caught my eye since the beginning and i dont know whats wrong with him is he my parental figure my wife my side piece my worst enemy my hater my lover my killer my doomer my caretaker my one-time-leave-you-for-nine-months

i genuinely cannot stand him hes the one who i always run to and check on firstin efents and stories not claerence not lars not alkaid but fucking CAEL.

i cant help it maybe in the end my heart really belongs to him because im still waiting for his route and for him to show moreemotion and maybe break down or slowly go through the agony of learning to accept love despite everything despite you

this is the only part i feel a little uneased about in the writers hands.. they are very capable hands.. but will they do him right.. hes so stupidly simple but not it makes me grit my teeth and die

◇°♡○♤○£▪︎¥°₩`£•♡○◇○♡♤◇•◇•♡☆

THANK YOU EVERYPONY FOR REASING IF YOU DID PLEASE SMASH THAT OIKE AND SUBACRIBE BUTTON FOR MORE UNHINGED RANTS IM SORRY FOR BEING AUSTISTIC AND MAY DO IT AGAIN ♡♡ GOD BLESS

#hi roi #it just hit me i didnt elaborate on the time fuckery and uh well

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girlwithfish · 11 months

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its really disheartening my therapist kind of dismissed me bringing up bpd idk. i know myself before than she does and its hard to talk about the reality of everything and maybe im not explaining it well. the only way maybe shed believe me is if i end up going to the hospital eventually when my bf calls someone on me when im threatening mylife! who knows. i do split and it is really common for ppl w this disorder bc i have read so much abt it and read ppls stories on the subreddit and their experiences to split only on their partners or very close personal friend or family member aka their fp. and the only reason i dont have unstable friendships is bc i literally do not have a single friend in my real life idk. and i dont talk to my family thst much. and idk she said bpd shows thru time but in a lot of things ive read it always says it tends to show up in early adulthood etc plus ive barely ever talked abt my childhood w my therapist or any thing abt my relationship to my parents or family and i dont have much of a relationship w family rn where id be splitting on them bc we dont talk to each other like that or argue its a more distant relationship that doesnt involve personal life if that makes sense. and a lot of ppl diagnosed bpd say they feel like they dont even have it or doubt themselves when theyre not in a relationship bc their symptoms are less severe or show up less bc a lot of bpd has to do w symptoms that show up in interpersonal dynamics. IDK. like i dont think i explain it well so she prob thinks im just fucking bullshitting when i say like yeah i relate to xyz symptom fear of abandonment etc emptiness and she doesnt even rly understand or talk much when i mention splitting but i definitely experience it and like 8 out of the 9 criteria i relate to, most pretty severely. idk i feel like no one takes me seriously lol idk its whatever and im not gonna take her word as like the highest authority bc its true she doesnt know me that well bc im very bad at giving the whole picture like yeah im not gonna tell u i literally get so unwell and paranoid i think someones going to kill me sometimes and that i have uncontrollable mental breakdowns where i honestly should have been hospitalized bc this is not fucking normal idk and the uncontrollable rage and intense emotions and i feel like i cant explain my pain well to anyone and no one takes it seriously anyway if i tried idk? maybe i should start writing down every thing that happens and be really honest when i do that and maybe itd be easier to talk abt if i write it down first idk. like the only reason she dismissed it is bc i dont have close relationships w any other person basically and ive never been in a long term relationship before my current or had a long term friendship irl it feels and its really hard to really know whats going on anymore. my sister doesnt rly understand it and her belief that i dont have bpd is bc "ive always been like this" and she thinks how i act is just like anxiety or depression but she doesnt rly understand bpd it feels cuz most ppl w bpd have depression? so saying like "xyz symptom is just depression" doesnt rly make sense. idk. its hard cuz idk whats real anymore and ok if i dont have bpd i justhave really bad anger issues and experience nearly every symptom and i understand its difficult to diagnose and comorbid w many other conditions but am i seriously supposed to just pretend im normal idk. not begging for a label but also want to know what the fuck is wrong w everything ive been going thru for nearly two yrs and a lot of things ive experienced before my relationship too but i dont think its crazy that a lot of symptoms got heightened when i got into a relationship bc a lot of ppl diagnosed w bpd also experience that yk and feel more stability when single etc. Idk idk. like i dont wanna pathologize everything but also its gotten so bad i feel like ive been dying for a year. thanks

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my-mt-heart · 1 year

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Ok im gonna try to bring a bit of positivity here even if it might not seem like it at first lol. U might have seen (but i think u avoid twitter right?) Carol being attacked these last few hours/days regarding Sophia/Ed. How she supposedly let Sophia being sexually abused by Ed without doing nothing. How she screamed to Shane "stop!" and cried when he beat up Ed. Meaning she was weak and ridiculous, again.

First of all i think (correct me if im wrong) that its considered canon that Ed didnt abuse (sexually, that is) Sophia... yet, because he died, but he would have had tried to had he lived because he saw her "growing up" and was a sick psycho. And Carol acted on it by having Sophia taken physically far away from her father if i recall well (dont have the exact scene in mind hence why im vague).

Second of all, this is bullshit obviously. Those people have never been abused and it shows. How its hard to leave, because you still love him and actually believe him when he says he wont hurt u again. Because he's a "great father" and "only" hit you and not ur children (its stastically rare i think but it does happen). I've worked with a lot of women beaten up by their husbands (and believe it or not, a few man with their wives too. Even husbands with husbands or wives with wives. Again, more rare but still here) and all combinations exist: women dont give a shit anymore, wont forgive, and only wants to leave and/or ptotect their children, woman who cant leave because they still see the "amazing" man he was for the first 10 years, or the first 3 years. Or says things like "he was beaten up when he was a child by his dad so its not his fault. "

ALL combinations exist, no one knows what its like to be in the head or the heart of a beaten 's wife/person, and no one should judge someone's way of coping with it, dealing with it, reacting to it. It is NEVER the victims fault, even if in the case of a beaten's wife, she stays with the husband.

Sorry, so, this disgression to say that Carol was insulted yesterday and so on for staying with Ed and not protecting Sophia.

The goods news (and here comes the positive part lol) is that for once, everyone was coming at these assholes (who, yes, happened to be Richonners, but NO, not all Richonners are this way, absolutely NOT).

And when i mean everyone, i mean even those who usually dont say shit when Carol (and therefore Melissa) is called ugly and/or too old for Daryl. Even those who dont ship caryl and/ or dont particularly like Carol are saying "ohh hell noo, too far, u re not victim blaming Carol here, absolutely not". Even the "kind of official fan accounts" followed by stars of the show.

So, while i wish she was defended more often already for the ageist and sexist part of the attacks she suffers, its still comforting to see that this time, everybody or almost see how too far they have gone and reacted accordingly.

Sorry if im clumsy in my way of writing or presenting things, english is not my native language, hope i did ok.

First of all, thank you for all you've done for survivors of domestic abuse and for sharing your insight. I heard about the incident through the grapevine and it was nice to go back and see all the support Carol was getting from all sides :)

Even though we have to be responsible for what we say on SM, I don't think it should just be left up to the fans to create a safer environment for them (and even cast and crew) to interact with each other. We should also put pressure on AMC to stop fueling the sexism, ageism, racism, etc. seen not just in one particular subset of the fanbase, but across the board. For example, how about making Carol the same size as Daryl in the key art so people can literally see her as a lead character? How about abandoning the ambiguous language around Caryl's relationship so people can understand that, yes, a middle-aged woman with gray hair can be the middle-aged male lead's love interest and vice versa? How about hiring someone who actually supports their characters and their relationship to run the official SM accounts? That's the kind of change I'd love to see.

#caryl #caryl spinoff #carol peletier #melissa mcbride #darylneedscarol

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iagreewithlilithsrightsnwrongs · 1 year

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do u think when lilith went through the portal a second time, she finally understood/remembered what happened after she got taken by the tarask in s1??? n why she comes back validly shaken n desperate for ANYONE to understand?

do u think she understood that adriel n reya know each other n he was her best bet at understanding her monster nature? i think thats why she went to him, scared out of her mind but hiding it well, n just going with whatever he was doing cuz she knew, as much as her sisters love her n care for her, they got no fucking clue whats going on. its not their fault, but she did leave toledo n her mother’s house knowing she needed to find answers fast, knowing she could never be the warrior nun and what that entails, knowing she shouldve made peace with that a long time ago but fuck that was her WHOLE LIFE thrown away by a complete newbie who made her like this!!! the very monster she was supposed to hunt!!!

my bby knew jack shit of what she was doing either, she just traded a bad situation for another bad situation that she could at least understand. i think thats why she trusts adriel so blindly, he SOUNDS like the answers she needed, she feels understood. but its also why at that ava n lilith scene where ava ends up hurting lilith on her face at the end, lilith is so fucking emotional n angry n scared when ava tells her to go back.

how can she go back when she fucked up like this? how can she go back n act like shes truly at their side when they cant n will never understand hers? how can she go back to a place where it felt like home, like her destiny, when she failed them so horribly? she can never go back. she doesnt believe she can or should. shes heartbroken, n she cares so deeply abt ava n her sisters but those hours spent on the other side showed her some truth she cant ignore. n now she has to live with it.

she wants to do what the warrior nun would do, save the world of evil, help her sisters. well, sometimes that job has difficult decisions. sometimes ppl die. im thinking abt the first ep when lilith tells mary that she knows what needs to happen. n shes right!! if they want to get rid of evil n save ppl, they need to be objective n follow the protocols. i think her siding with adriel n then her, at the end after he dies, when she warns beatrice of the war, helps ava to a place where she knows she can heal n survive, n literally does not give a single fuck abt adriel afterwards, just needed to warn her sister n go away, maybe to prepare herself for this war, was lilith’s way of doing what a warrior nun would do.

she thought adriel could actually give her the tools n maybe even help her save the world. but then he died n she understood that maybe she needs to do this shit by herself. so she flies off, no fucks given. her business here is done, n now there’s war preparations to be done. i dont think she was ever in love with adriel, they were using each other for their own goals.

would i have preferred if lilith found her new monster identity by herself n with the help of her sisters?? yes. do i like that she trusted a crusty white men to do it?? no. but i cant stand when ppl say that lilith loves adriel or smth. bby she didnt blink when the guy died. she was like “oh well, time to help beatrice save ava” like??? that scene shocked me n gave me hope that maybe lilith matured in a way that made her harder to manipulate. doubtful, but im hopeful.

that girl is still very much driven by ambition but also by praise. those are her weaknesses for sure.

also im pretty sure shes gonna get killed off next season cuz im used to shows like these to disappoint me so. yh.

#warrior nun #sister lilith #oh hey im #hello hi i love her have u noticed??#VERY much giving the writers too much credit btw im so sure they were just like yh lilith is gonna get manipulated to do evil again ig #why? shes lilith its in the name shes like an evil woman or whatever #they wanted to make one of the sisters evil so bad n they had to choose the one that had a redemption arc before for the same reasons #really. just. really????#tbh make shannon a lil evil. did u see the way she looked at the halo when it rejected susanna?? that look was weirdddd #no one is talking abt it. i forgot s1 when i watched s2 n i didnt have all the context n i legit thought shannon was revealed evil in s1 #because of the way she looked at the halo after it came out of susanna's fucking back. now that would be interesting #shannon not being as good as everyone thought. having some secrets. maybe knowing more than we think. thats would b juicy #anyways this is the version of lilith that i have in my head n if it isnt canon thannnnn idc the worlds my oyster i do what i want :))

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sinkingcapricornmoon · 2 years

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songs that remind me of moral orel and why part 1

it is almost 6 am but im suffering from moral orel brainrot so i decided to explain my moral orel playlist. note that this includes my personal headcanons. also english isnt my first language so i apologize for the lack of grammar.

no children - the mountain goats - for obvious reasons. im pretty sure you all know why + it’s in the show (added perfectly if i may add) - it’s the perfect clay and bloberta song. clay hates himself as much as he hates his wife. - notable lyrics :- “i hope i never get sober” - it’s clay’s way of coping. he’ll never let alcohol go because it’s the only thing that makes him feel sane. "and i'd hope that if I found the strength to walk out, you'd stay the hell out of my way” - i think that the only reason they are still together is because they care about their image. they want everyone to believe that they are the perfect family, and that fact alone is worth staying. but they obviously want out, they just don’t have the strength.

“i am drowning, there is no sign of land, you are coming down with me, hand in unlovable hand, and I hope you die. I hope we both die” - both of them are victims of each other. they are aware that they are terrible for each other but it’s their comfort zone. they are hand in hand in this terrible relationship since its the only love they know.

special girl - dodie - while not all the lyrics are relevant, and i think the singer intended for the song to mean something completely different, i feel like this is bloberta’s song. - bloberta likes to feel special. so she goes out her way to prove to others that she’s worth loving. because of how her family treated her, she feels like the black sheep of the family so she wants to be good. she wants to help. - being married to clay, she knows of her flaws, and she does not care what clay thinks about it. as long as she does her duties, and feels like she’s a part of something, that enough. - notable lyrics:- “it's not my fault, i was raised by open mouths and teary eyes, passive wistful lullabies. i found my worth in this world by proving I'm a special girl, time and time again.” - bloberta was raised by a critical mom and an emotionally unavailable dad. this causes her to feel as if she has to always be useful to gain attention. (i feel like this applies to clay and his father too except clay’s way of getting attention is to act out and get abused...)

“could not care less if you love me, but hate me first, yeah make me work, that’s perfect.” - i’m taking the “make me work” part literally because all she wants to do is work to feel like she is worth something. she cant care less if clay is unhappy with her, if they are in truly in love or not, she just wants to be a part of something. she’s grown up believing this as well, not just because of her parents but because of moralton’s values. you need to be with someone so u can fulfill god’s wishes.

guiltless - dodie (can u tell im obsessed with dodie) - this is in the pov of orel, after he realizes his dad isn’t a good dad. isn’t a dad worth honoring. - it could be about his mother too. they’re both just not good parents. they do their duties to provide, but there’s no emotional connection there. (there is a bit with clay, but you can tell it’s only when it’s about clay. its not that he doesnt care about orel.. he cares in his own sick, unhealthy way) - notable lyrics:- “oh, but I'm not bitter, I'm just tired. no use getting angry at the way that you're wired. ignorant trauma in one afternoon” - I feel like orel has too much of a good heart to hate clay. he’s just tired, and he knows clay won’t change. the line ignorant trauma in one afternoon reminds me so much of when clay shot him. it’s nothing to clay, he even gaslit orel right after, saying he didn’t do it. to him it was just a small matter, not knowing or acknowledging the emotional and physical pain that will stick with orel for the rest of his life. “is it real? you believe you're guiltless. oh, I can tell you believe you're guiltless. but I don't think I’d feel better if I opened your eyes, i'll carry your burden 'til the day that you die“ - Clay hasn’t apologized. in fact, he tells him how happy he was that he shot him. I think even if he did, Orel wouldn’t feel content. he realizes after that just how much clay does not appreciate him, does not love him as much as he loves alcohol. so he’ll carry the burden of the trauma clay had caused him to the grave. he doesn’t despise clay, he’s just dissapointed.

“not one shred of hope, so I built up my own“ - Before the nature episode, Orel has always looked up to his dad because he always asked his dad for advice - terrible advice. even though clay clearly was horrible to him, he overlooked all of that. he had hope.

“and I could never let you know (oh, you'd never get it) and now I'm the one who can't let go (oh, don't say it's genetic)” I think that Orel will never let clay know the trauma he caused him, because I don’t think clay will think he’s wrong. when orel grows up it’ll just be a looming shadow that follows him. this doesn’t mean he won’t be happy when he grows up though, in the last ep he’s clearly happy with his own children, he broke the cycle of generational trauma, but it will stay as it does with anyone who has abusive parents who just won’t get it.

pls let me know if u guys have any songs that remind u of these 3 as well. i need something to fill the void.

here’s the full playlist, there’s not much songs but im still trying to find the perfect songs because this stupid puppet show is all i think about now - (x)

#moral orel analysis #moral orel #myposts #moral orel songs #the mountain goats #dodie clark #orel puppington #clay puppington #bloberta puppington

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socksnstuff00 · 2 years

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https://socksnstuff00.tumblr.com/post/683920303041232896/i-remember-every-single-one-of-the-melt-downs-i

would u mind describe all these melt downs 😂 I love ur funny reactions

oh yes Annie! absolutely lmao just now i was looking for something to distract me from work.

first of all shoutout to @ilovethisgame-andiloveyou for the awesome compilation 💜

Christmas 2021. Not only bitch woke up and choose murder for Christmas but it was the first time she acknowledged us the shippers so this is basically how we confirmed she knows we know lmao also this pic gave us the confirmation that no one really needed that they were indeed “rommates” in Manchester. Wonderful :D

2. Titan’s Bday (2021). Everyone was walking on their tiptoes around this one and it was a whole mess cause someone took it from someone’s private account and we all had to act like the pic didn’t existed until Clementine went and posted it herself like “yeah we did spent her bday together, so what?” ending once and for all the whole mistery .. and our lives ofc lmao

3. 1rst send off game against Mexico AKA my favorite game of all time! The whole experience was magical but when they posted the pic after the game it was the cherry on top of the cake. I say THEY cause Thermometer also posted it and istg I cried lmao the interwebs went WILD lol even a “straight” friend of mine who’s a football fan of Telephone sent me the pic not knowing I was already obsessed with it lmao. I ascended for sure.

4. Walking for oneness (2021). Such a nice and serene shot and also posted on a random Sunday when no one of us was expecting it. To tell you I screamed lmao they’re so in sync and she decided to show us more of their cute rituals. Also some of the funniest comments from the deniers lmao.

5. Tokyo 2021. Istg she posted this one to let us know they found time for a little date while they were at the olys lmao. They’re so cute! I really love their faces in here. Everyone else were together doing whatever and these two in their own world .. like always 😉

6. Teasing us like this is a game lmao (London 2021) this one made us update our deduction skills lmao we all become sherlock for a day xD from the sneakers to the purple vest to the body language and the pose lmao conclusion? 100% pure gay

7. 3000m hi (2021) AKA the one that broke us all. I mean, I still look at it and I cant believe it exists and she posted it herself, gay on main! Look at them, just LOOK AT THEM! This is the gayest shit I have ever seen lmao I remember I received the notif and literally dropped my phone. Hell im still freaking out nowdays xD I don’t think I will ever be over it. As I said before, they’ll have to post a pic making out to outgay this one!

8. London good bye (2022) WAGging era at its finest.The beginning and the end of one of my fave eras of them all. also No one can convince me she didn’t posted this pic to let the world know the exact reason why she decided to spend her vacays in the UK lmao.:D look how cute they are. How proud Cocaine is of her girl and how incredibly happy Tusi looks of having her wife there for her. Fucking priceless T.T I might cry again

9. Couple’s photo (2022) this one im currently on the middle of the melt down lmao. as I said, I saw it in the morning while i was omw to work and I literally had to park on a random gas station so I could release some pressure lmao. I DIED, y’all interacting with a ghost now xD

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sanchoyo · 1 year

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arc v ep 88-100 thoughts... cannot believe I hit ep 100 already. hell yeah

also my cat sat on my laptop and typed this while I was watching and its important I leave in HER thoughts too. she says: "4r4 rrrrrr rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr4ggggj,"

ok now onto My Thoughts (which are considerably less Important than hers)

-ok shun leaping onto his monster to save a small child then everyone being like 'omg i cant believe he'd do that..wow…hes not so bad…' LIKE? YOU THOUGHT HE WAS HEARTLESS??? dude cares SO much hes been consistently trying to stop a war and find his sister and stuff??? jkdashkj (also it was just very dramatic and Cool and made me laugh bc he was SO serious and straight faced during the whole thing. nerves of STEEL)

-'i wonder if kurosaki is a lot like crow'….theyre both bird boys. theyre uniting to be bird FRIENDS and FIST BUMPED OVER IT WHY AM I TEARING UP. SHUN LOST WITH A SMILE TOO….im glad theyre friends and birds and birdfriends. even jack smiled over crow winning AAAUGH. STOPPP. too cute. didnt expect this ep to be so WHOLESOME

-the subs said smth like 'youre one of us' when they were through speaking (which is lovely bc they have a solidarity in that they both have causes theyre fighting for) but the more literal translation of what was said was closer to 'you're one of my/our friends now' from crow. Augh. AUGGH. ;_;

my god the sora meeting up with yuzu then their monsters working together (in an ADORABLE dance sequence) was THEE best thing ever like 2 eps in a row have been BANGERS and making me unlock new emotions. I love both of their decks SO much too????

screenshots that made me bawl my eyes out tbh. like I literally, actually cried a little JKADSHKFJ sora has FRIENDS for the first time and he LOVES THEM and they TRUST HIM he found the best friends ever and its SO tender. this is why I watch ygo btw. sobbing in the club rn.

-yuzu declares shes gotta save yuya bc he is, once again, locked up. girl boss protag! …of course tsukikage interrupted and tbh he and sora had Points abt it being better if sora goes and gets yuya since hes…yeah, trained for this kinda stuff but they all trust each other and the whole teacher and student thing with yuzu and sora…god theyre all so CUTE this is EXACtly what I wanted ;__; exactly what i NEEDED.

-yugo v serena started exactly how I expected jdshjk I LOVE how constantly Pissed serena is. shes SO blunt and I love her for it. (but also wARRANTED he got way too clingy fast and im sure thats Weird for her. gotta assume her and yuri werent…like, even acquaintances or anything by way she acts around the yu boys) she did make sure to let yugo know she expected a lot from him from his last duel which was Something. but my god yugo is SO in love with rin isnt he kjdsahkj hes got like that wholesome childhood friends puppy love, the way he imagines her, and its REALLY cute. cannot wait to actually meet rin…

-roget is so damn annoying that everytime he speaks i just hear the adults from the peanuts cartoons so i cant recall, but hes saying smth abt wanting serena to be a symbol for the commons and the tops and im like. he wants her and yuzu so academia cant have them and has his own plans for them, but. does he know WHY academia wants them? im gonna need him to share with the class. I still need to know too

-also its rly annoying that roget is cheesing the duel in serena's favor. but also I'm always rooting for the girls so like. i get it, but if shes gonna win I want it to be on her own merits yk… (rin seems so cute from the flashbacks also, she always WON IN THEIR DUELS?? GIRL IS STRONG IM EVEN MORE EXCITED TO MEET HER)

-yuyas thng where he can astral project (??) himself into his alt selves bodies is creepy and i KNOW its prob not supposed to be but it IS and I Dont Like it. Pls dont Dissolve yugo too like u did with yuto. maybe it only happens to them when theyre not in their dimension. maybe yugo will absorb yuya instead. I DOUBT it since yuya is protag protected but still

-….yugo being like 'no, i LIKE it that when youre in trouble the course changes and u get an action card!! its cool and a good thing!!!" OK FEMINIST KING JHDSKJF. hes great and I love him. (also yeah its not her FAULT roget is trying to give her advantages but id argue having yuya backseating on the duel is also kinda cheesing it for yugo so. theyre EVEN on the unintentional cheating)

-much as I hate to see her lose her attitude makes PERFECT sense given how she was raised in academia. duels are not Games to her, theyre tools, and she hates relying on whats basically handouts from roget to win or dumb luck. perfectly understandable and I appreciate her stubbornness and sense of honor abt it. but gotta agree with yugo that nah girl take the W if u can jkdhsjk. she ofc changes her tune later in the duel but Still

-oh my god yuri is HERE im going to PUKE just seeing his silhouette made me get so hyped up. i dont even KNOW him hes barely had ANY screentime but the way the other characters and even fucking roget hyped him make me like. dude u better be a hammy villain i have HIGH hopes for u. if hes good at being squirrely he WILL be my fav yuya counterpart EASY bc looks wise hes already my fav. pink and purple is unbeatable. but hes just STANDING THERE. MENACINGLY. with his lil bunny hair...tbh kinda cute.

-AWWW serena being like 'why am i getting kind of excited…' girl has had so little Hype in her life and this is def her first time hearing ppl cheer for her im gonna cry. id hype u up bestie ur SO cool and good at dueling….AND SHE GOT TO SAY LADIES AND GENTLEMEN THIS TIME. and SHE IS ENJOYING HERSELF GOOD FOR HER. I did kinda figure she woulnt win or go all the way (and I assume the same goes for yugo...) but. still very proud of her. and her and yugo had funnnn together ;w; yugo is lowkey befriending ALL the yuzu counterparts isnt he. king shit! love him!

-I know this shot of yuri standing is supposed to be menacing and threatening but he looks like a little. i dont know. like a littol kitty or perhaps a pug dog. he said :I look at him:

-btw why was he on top of the stadium howd he get up there. WHY IS HE STANDING ON TOP OF A MOVING TRUCK??? then he leaps OFF it and-- all the yuboys are so…acrobatic…I mean it makes sense if him and sora were both academia-trained but still...not Normal.

-oh…layra coming to save serena while reiji creates an opening for them and trusts his sibling to go do that…look at layras character development bc of jacks inspiration…layra got so vocal and seemed so confident IM SO PROUD OF ALL MY KIDS RN. SNIPED 3 COPS TOO. SO QUICKLY. it was barely a duel god damn. they are reijis sibling huh

-the way reiji keeps WINNING (also I love how his scarf defies gravity. very cool) roget is SOO mad and I love to see it. he said hes going to KILL REIJI AND THE COUNCIL? NOT DUEL THEM? KILL THEM OUTRIGHT? oh ok roget. sure you will when we have checks episode count at least …2-3 seasons left. sure you'll kill the sort of rival but not exactly character, who leads the lancers. I totallllly believe u ;)

-eeeeugh roget is so creepy 'normally i wouldve wanted to rework his (yuya) brain first but-' blah blah blah do you realize youre talking abt modifying a living person against their will. i mean hes already done it to every cop and sergey. but still. urgh creepy and bad.

-obv I know yuya will win the friendship cup stuff and duel jack. bc protag. but them pitting yuya v crow seems like swinging a bat at the hornets nest (the fandom) by definitively saying one is a better duelist and would win against the other…sjdhfkjn its the reason we dont get protag v protag duels in stuff like bbt n no conclusive winner to the judai v yugi duel i guess hahah. tbf this duel was p much all Thee Demon and not yuya, and fixed at the start so crow didnt do his 100% best on the first turn, and its not as if yuya planned to go thru with it at ALL bc hes got priorities, but ofc I figured thatd get dashed...despite their scheming...ugh. still a bit bummed. hope they have an earnest on screen duel fr before the end...

-I do love yuya and crow PLOTTING TOGETHER. thats great….schemers! also glad the whole 'crow thinks yuya might be working w the tops' shit was short-lived bc I knew crow wouldnt buy that

-sora…jumped onto a helicopter's wheel..and is just hanging on…his upper core and arm strength has to be INSANE what the HELL dude if u fall u will DIE dont DO THAT

-the silly music that plays when yuya brings out his hippos is such a bop. loveeee this ost

-….YUYA WAS GOING TO JUMP AND ABANDON THE DUEL TO GO TRY AND FIX SHIT. my god he was so close to breaking the unspoken ygo rule (protags always win tournaments) to ABANDON THE TOURNAMENT FOR THE SAKE OF THE PLOT!!! i cant believe it…roget stopped him with a BRAIN SHOCK??? he put some shit in his helmet :( at least its not IN HIS BRAIN I guess?? oh my god it increases aggression too. roget you are so so stupid man hes got a DEMON in his necklace or some shit you CANNOT be doing this its gonna come out and EAT you. or worse, eat crow who I actually like. i wouldnt MIND if it ate roget

-we then get a really cool shot of a red eye looking over a disintegrating city line. and all the yu-dudes have a Moment. uhhh safe to say this demon thats attached to all of them wiped out a fucking huge city or dimension/world? great. very cool. roget you dumb fuck youre going to cause the apocalypse or something

-the demon said fuck ya friends im winning the duel lmaooo of course its a demon with priorities to duel. classic ygo moment. the other yuboys are completely controlled and copying yuyas movements and their eyes are doing the Thing….ok, so the demons goal is 100% absorb all of them into one like what happened with yuto.. like to get the power of all the dimensions/their dragons all together? ? still like, doesnt explain why they all look the same or how the yuzugirls/bracelets are involved really, but im pretty sure thats the Idea right…starting to think we cant Friendship our way out of this and the demon might end up being. a real problem and not a Potential Bud. Sad

-'if he dies he dies' ok roget. youre horrible. VERY effective villain tho

-oh christ academia is here too rn? WORST timing. but im like. on the edge of my seat this is season finale worthy tension.

-btw this is a VERY funny screenshot. sora jumped from a helicopter WAY up in the air perfectly onto crows bike SOMEHOW without shattering all of his leg bones. what they dont tell you abt academia is that they replace all of your bones with a sturdy rubber so u can do unlimited parkour without hurting urself

-jack finally got up out of that damn chair he was so pissed crow lost jkdshjk. real. me and jack ALWAYS on same wavelength. twinsies <3

-yuya said FUCK the friendship cup im leaving for real this time. good for him. dip out and save ur friends. but you WILL be back to finish the tournament or so help me god. thats ygo LAW.

-genuinely didnt expect yugo and yuri to be SO funny when they interacted but my god i kept having to pause and laugh. but also…uhh…yugo really thought yuzu was DEAD?? he did keep sayin yuzu from heaven or smth along those lines BUT I THOUGHT HE WAS BEING CUTE AND CALLING HER AN ANGEL OR SMTH LIKE. AS A PET NAME. HE REALLY. THOUGHT SHE WAS DEAD? 'then I suppose rin lives on in your heart too' BRUTAL. but I laughed. sjdfkjn

btw this?

sounded like a genuine laugh jkhdsfjk and was super cute. im...hesitant to say i SHIP any of the yuboys bc im terrified its gonna be smth like theyre bros. literally interdimensional brothers or smth insane like that. but. if that DOESNT end up being the case. cmon. look at them.

-the council being like 'hmmm hmm yes maybe we shall use sergey and make peace with roget afterall to get him on our side :)' and reiji looking PISSED. my god I would be too, hes done so much for you FUCKS. down with the council and roget and academia and the tops/police force in synchro. they ALL gotta go.

-….god tsukikage is the best isnt he. as far as he knows, the carding of his bro is like. equal to death (I know it cant be, no way we're losing that many minor characters FOREVER. just like im 100% sure yuto will Be Back or smth) and still, hes like no we dont hold grudges thats not the way of my clan. thanks for your help. to sora. very tender and sweet moment im so glad…..

-YUYA LITERALLY BUSTING IN ON A MOTORCYCLE. ICONIC ENTRANCE AND THANK GOD. poor layra had to fight waaay too long :<

-…shun is WAY too extra I LOVE him lmaooo he straight up started bodying ppl underground with his fists AGAIN the second he heard academia was here. gonna need a shun fight compilation or gifset immediately if such a thing exists. and if not I will MAKE it. bird of Incredible Violence

-the REVOLUTION IS STARTINGGGGG OK SHINJI LETS GOOOOOO this is awesome

-…my god the stuff with layra and serena turned into a clusterfuck SO fast. sora showed up to try and help. yuya showed up to try and help. then YURI SHOWED UP. AND YUGO. and yuzu, FINALLY. everything happens So Much. (and then fucking sergey too) everyone is kinda in One Spot huh…Bad Feeling abt This

-speaking of bad feelings. when all the yu's dragons came out! and they started talking about becoming one and saying shit like 'i'll be revived!' ok. so. yuya's demon is trying to resurrect itself and needs all the yu's to do it. bad! kinda suspecting yuri and yugo are gonna go to Spirit Town with yuto kjsdnkjn oh no. so its like. safe to assume this is some zorc type shit? the demon put pieces of itself into each of them? the dragons are like, the key to Waking it Up (which…yuya did get his mysteriously from pendulum stuff right. his DAD gave him the pendulum necklace didnt he. im SO sus abt his fuckin dad rn I dont trust him I KNOW how ygo dads Are. this is his fault somehow. he gave his son a cursed Amulet type shit)

-…and the yuzugirls all have bracelets that can detect and lead to the demon when its active? …does reiji's dad know this? and wants them all together and to find the demon? and assumedly put it back together/fuse the yuboys for world/dimensional domination? maybe thats why hes trying to fuse the dimensions together, so he can rule them All with Demon Power (tm)? cliche but thats my best guess… but like. if thst WAS the case he'd just need one of the girls bc yuzu could find yuya on her own? or maybe leo is actually…trying to STOP the demon thing and is going abt it in the worst fuckedest up way possible. thats also a possibility. but he seems like. he doesnt give a FUCK abt the yuboys at all and just wants the girls so??? do they also have a demon. doesnt seem like it but that would be sick af I think the girls deserve to go a bit feral too. as a treat

-if…fusing the yuboys is the demons ultimate goal its already halfway there LOL got yuto! doesnt explain why it would split itself across dimensions to be in them in the first place or anything or why itd pick yuya and his counterparts unless it chose them from birth or smth (which explains why they might look the same kinda?) (I am going to assume when we keep seeing that cityline being destroyed in yuya's vision, that it at one time was some big bad. so assumedly it got destroyed and maybe scattering itself was a last ditch effort in hopes of being revived?? or someone else did it??) also still doesnt explain how the yuzugirls factor in. im trying so hard rn to figure it Out. the whole 'we will be ONE AGAIN' thing did confirm a lot of my suspicions tho and if I was yugo and yuri id get the HELL OUT OF DODGE tbh

-also. the bracelets have teleportation powers. (yuboys specifically targetted during it…) what does THAT imply? that the dragons pull them together…and the bracelets are tools to keep them apart? from fusing? hm. so what im understanding is yuzu protag real

-earthbounds are SO cute I loved them in 5ds how is it fair that SERGEY has them. bullshit

-btw I appreciate how cute yuzu's prison jumpsuit is. shes just runnin around in a lil onesie doing all of this. I mean motorcycle suits are also onesies. this is the onesie arc

-why has the nerve gas on serena lasted so long. i feel like it shouldve long since worn off

-the entire duel between barett and yuya was 'tell me where yuzu is.' 'no' 'tell me' 'i..said i wasnt going to?' 'tell me' 'no' tell me' 'NO' 'oh shes here :)' 'FUCK' like for 20 mins I swear to god jasdfk

-they took serena nooooooo. sad :( I hope we can see a lil of academia and keep following her while shes there (and that shes not just thrown in a cell) oh!! i hope her and rin and ruri can meet up there!!! I want to see them

-SERGEY HAS DISGUSTING LEG…ENGINES??? HE FUCKING LAUNCHED OFF WITH YUZU. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK. diGUSTING this man is nightmare duel what the hell. not my best girl :<

-layra deciding sora is a Safe Person and clinging to him…VERY cute ;_; sora once again being the one to go and try to save yuzu too…BESTIES.

-…the fact the duel arena is..empty bc the fucking revolution is happening outside LMAO even gon is like 'hey why the hell are they even continuing the tournament rn this is ridiculous' same dude!!

-holy shit jack is finally doing smth. jack is going to beat sergeys ass im so ready do it king. his cool as a cucumber disposition and pretty face are like. the only buffer I have to protect me from sergey

-choziro appealing to shingos EGO to get him to protect layra is SO funny. hes got NO braincells and hes the best for it

-ohhh the rain during the sergey v jack match. jack In The Rain while sergey DESTROYS THE ROAD. its so DRAMATIC and cool and I love this for him yesss show this guy how jack duels!!! #1 king of all time. hes calling him shit like 'fool' and 'buffoon' too such a jack moment. and 'if theres perfection, its ME' oh my GOD I love you SO much jack. pls.

-I need u all to understand ygo is My Sports Game I'm hysterical rn over jack slipping past sergey and then RIDING BACKWARDS TO FACE HIM. love when jack does that

-by the way, roget bringing yuzu up to have someone to monologue at? v funny

-jack caused sergey to have some kind of fucking…duelgasm which caused an Error. which is Disturbing I hate this dude TF. this is the effect jack has on everyone tho I guess

-ROGETS LITTLE 'SERGEEEEY!!!' SCREAM WAS SO FUCKING FUNNY I NEED A CLIP OF THAT HIS VOICE. LIKE. JKDFHKJ. hes LOSING his shit I cant stop laughing

-I Never Doubted Jack for One Second

-You Ever Have a Duel So Good You Kill Yourself After. ok. goodbye sergey. cannot say I will miss you infact I am very Relieved actually

-…by the way. does jack know anything abt whats currently happening with the plot? im sure he at least knows abt the revolution but does he know abt the lancers/academia stuff? hes been on his Chair most of the time so I assume Not which is very funny. this random dude just dueled him, turned into a bike, then killed himself after and jack is like. well ok. JKDSHFKJ

-some rando street dudes killed sergey actually. but he was def falling on purpose. either way. watching roget LOSE it is so funny his plan has sucked ass from the start

-shun scooping layra up was really cute. Scooped

-HOLY SHIT YUZU. SLAMMED INTO ROGET AND HE HIT HIS HEAD ON THE EDGE OF HIS CHESS TABLE. i LOVE how shes consistently been a Get Shit Done girl even when shes cuffed rn. she said ya im gonna go steal his broadcast and get MY message out

-jack said for sam to tell yuya: Yuya Im Fucking Disappointed in You. Stop dueling like a Damn Animal. and this is enough to make yuya actually remember his goals. and run to the palace to duel jack again. to stop the riots and shit with a Duel. Good

-reijis smile when layra ran and hugged him PLS. cute

-the council finally gets fucking Told by Reiji. 'those who sit on the sidelines have no right to speak about the future' hey reiji youre the best (and his whole speech was REALLY good)

-shun and his Flock of Birds comes to Help. why is that so funny and kinda sweet. hes gotta STAND on his too while it flies like a drama queen

-the tournament was basically canceled bc we didnt get the semifinal duels BUT we are getting jack v yuya anyway of course as the finale…is it bad I still want jack to win? I want yuya to be fine with winning so long as it makes ppl smile bc THATS his main goal and jack is a symbol of hope for the ppl in this city…so I want jack to Win…again…but this is a duel for yuya to redeem himself after losing to jack the first time isnt it. aah

-'i declared martial law!' 'no you dont' thats basically what the council guy did kjshk

-lancers beating cops up together in the stadium :) on live tv….fun lil friend group activity aw…

-JACK SMILED WHEN HE SAW LAYRA DUEL IM ACTUALLY EXPERIENCING CUTE AGGRESSION BC OF JACK

-by the way can roget even duel. he hasnt, hes just had other ppl do it for him and been hellbent on KILLING ppl when it comes down ot it. which is. weird and funny for a ygo villain ur not even gonna duel for urself dude? do u even have any cards

-radish horse is such a cute card btw. all of yuyas cards are p Cute.

-im SO glad jack said 'dude STOP with your fathers words and speak with YOUR OWN WORDS' tbh real and true.

-…the subs this ep abruptly changed rogets name to roger….lol roger. (and the font changed between episodes which is like. Why did you do that. I cant focus on anything else now that its Weird)

-the sound gons shoes make is like asmr to me. clank clank clank :)

-I like how jack basically teaches yuya his own will can be learned from others but duels are conversations and u gotta use ur own 'words/will' to convey what youve gotten from everyone youve dueled before. its like. abt appreciating and carrying ppl before u with u. and gratitude for everyone whos taught u smth put towards achieving ur own goals. dueling for others sakes. very cute message and true bc yuya wouldnt be able to do half the stuff he can w/ pendulum if it wasnt for his buds yk

-omg jack laughed and was smiley :) yayy

-the clown guy from 5ds made a cameo! still dont remember shit abt him besides the fact he has a Clown Wife and is on arc v money…?? Ok

-ok the end of the duel was pretty cute im not even that mad abt jack losing. bc jack was happy…it makes sense too. when ur the king it can be BORING if no one challenges u or whatever

-not a huge fan of the cops magically bein buds now but fine, I get it was mind control making them suck ass and this is a more idealistic world

-the..council disbanded? cool. the upper class will dissolve and the lower class will be able to live better…very optimistic happy ending…and it all happened very fast, compared to the pacing of this arc so far tbh??? like. ok guess nothing is bad and everything is Fine Immediately! (this is a thing every ygo series does tho so. not a total awful thing I cant look past, but it did give me kinda mood whiplash)

-yuzu and reiji calling roget out!!! reiji must be so damn tired of adults not taking responsibility!!! his whole thing is just running around cleaning up after grown ass men!!!

-im tired too, reiji. tired of yuzu being a Damsel to Roget. let her DO more next arc or so Help Me God

-next episode(s) are supposed to be watched together in a HOUR LONG SPECIAL ohh. inchresting

-love how even tho they were also going w yuya to where reiji and yuzu are, heaven FORBID crow and jack ride in the copter with yuya. no, they HAD to ride their d-wheels here.

-holy shit. so. tsukikage and sora DID win the duel against roget! and so did reiji! hes just! a fucking cheating bastard! like 'neverending duel that wont end ever until u quit' ok…that does fit rogets character LMAO hes a WORM. of course I trust reiji to be the one to be able to Beat The Bullshit

-roget is such a fuckin slime trying to turn the lancers against reiji and reiji countered his logic with ONE sentence lmao. also reijis lil smile when yuya said he trusts reiji :( sweet…

-ohhh…yuya and yuzu hugging and crying bc they FINALLY got each other back…tender…

-roget says he'll drop everything into the void between dimensions. So there IS a void. did I not say in one of these posts I think the yuya demon crawled out of a void in between dimensions. now we have confirmed such a space EXISTS… will I Be Right? :3c

-….roget got sucked in and the portal closed. lmao. is he DEAD? goodbye forever (hopeful)

-…fuck. the wormhole also took yuzu, yuya, gon, shun, and shingo…. to xyz dimension!! yeahhh heartland!!!! LOVE IT. KAITO TIME??? prayin its kaito time.

-'the capital of despair, heartland' is the ep title. oof. heartland looking rough :(

I will say its funny (in a horrible way) they took the Cheeriest Setting (heartland) and did this to it. and that gx setting which is also pretty chill (a school setting...) and made them fucking interdimensional warmongers. and 5s, the canonically most gritty setting was Not Involved like until the lancers showed they were the neutral ones hahah

-arc area project!!! we havent gotten a name for leo's lil 'unify the dimensions' scheme yet until now! so…arc is in the name. back to my og theory the name arc v means more than fifth series in the ygos. and like. theres (5) dimensions for Sure right. (or, the unity of the four would be the fifth?) hm. Thinking

-shingo asking the real q of why the hell turning ppl into cards/waging war on xyz would help fuse dimensions. i also still want to know. (we keep seeing the shot of leo feeding the cards into a machine, so..hes using…soul/ppl power? to power it to fuse the dimensions?? dude what good is ruling dimensions if NO ONE is left in them???)

-…a lot of this two parter was flashbacks/recapping stuff. I…kinda appriciate the earlier flashbacks but god it could've went faster.

-KAITOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! OF COURSE YOU WOULD SHOW UP ON EPISODE 100!!! SOOO HAPPY TO SEE U :D zexal is the series I KNOW the most like its engraved in my brain, unlike 5ds where I barely remembered enough to be able to tell all the ways its an au, so im gonna be fucking ON IT trying to figure out stuff Now. also, is kaito the only zexal character? why? dont two gx charas show up? and we had jack and crow in the synchro world?? zexal shouldve gotten 2. I vote akari bc 1. she didnt get enough screentime and we always need More Girls 2. she can ride a bike so if they go back to synchro shes set already 3. she kicks ass and is a reporter so she could be trying to report on the war/document it. 4. her and melissa could be reporter gfs. im RIGHT hear me out.

-oh at the end of the ep there was a promo for dsod? this came out around then?? wow thats wild. I saw that movie in THEATERS when it released in the us. very fun. the nearest theater that was showing it was 2 hours away lol. we should have another ygo movie. pls. (maybe not another dm one tho…)

#sanchoyo liveblogs arc v #yaaay episode 100 :) nooo only like 50 eps left??#aaaugh <- hates starting new things but also hates ending things #i GUESS I will watch vrains too after but not IMMEDIATELY after #tbh go rush looks more interesting to my personal tastes BUT.#ive watched all the ygos in chronological order so far...i dont want to skip just in case. what if go rush has like #a 2 second reference to vrains or sevens that i dont understand :( bc i skipped them :(#also go rush is still airing so id be annoyed if I ran out of eps and had to WAIT jdkf #but.....aliens.......#my friends Aliens (<- loves aliens....)#:(#sanchoyorambles #arc v #ygo

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