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hausofneptune · 4 months

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aspects/placements i love (and hate!) in my chart pt. 1

[astro notes no. 003]

hey y’all! i felt like going through some of my personal aspects/placements and describing the “positive” and “negative” ways they’ve manifested in my life, so here we are. this ended up being longer than i thought it would, so i'll end up doing a part two since i really enjoyed making this!

disclaimers | masterlist | ask

venus conj. neptune in aquarius (1°03’) in the 1H

this is one of my favorite placements. i feel like this + my pisces sun can make me appear to others as “ethereal” at times, but if i’m keeping it a buck, it also makes me extremely evasive. i have a good amount of aquarius influence in my chart as well, so all of this combined definitely makes me feel like i have to put in effort to not come off as too impersonal, especially towards my loved ones.

having neptune in my 1H also makes me feel like people perceive me to be someone that i’m not. like even my close friends and family, i don’t feel like anyone actually understands who i am, and i don’t think i’ve ever had a relationship (platonic, romantic, or familial) where i felt like i was seen for who i actually am, or where i was able to connect to somebody on a deeper, spiritual level. i can also over-romanticize people and situations at times, but i’ve grown out of this habit… for the most part.

i’ve always been an extremely creative/artistic person. i’ve been drawing, painting, writing, and singing since i was a kid, and i even sell my artwork now as an adult. i’m extremely imaginative, but i do have to be careful to not get too in my head and forget to participate in reality, if that makes sense. i’ve also had issues with dissociation and memory loss throughout my life. i feel like my lived experience has more to do with that, but i can see how the Neptunian influence in my chart could play a role in it as well.

venus opposite north node in the 7H (1°40’)

there are some placements that convince me that the universe was tryna be funny when it made my birth chart. this is one of them. i have so many things in my chart that can make it challenging at times to form meaningful, trustful relationships with other people, and it’s interesting to me the fact that my spiritual growth is something that’s supposed to be found… through my relationships with other people. i try not to victimize myself too much and look at things from an objective lens, but i would be lying if i said it didn’t feel like people find it convenient to have me in their lives only when i allow them to view me in a way that makes them feel the most comfortable.

like i mentioned, i can be very avoidant, it’s something i’m working on. but i know that it’s possible for me to have fulfilling connections with other people, and obviously with this placement it’s something i need to work through my aversion to, seeing as my self-development and spiritual growth is something that’s extremely important to me and deep down i do want to want to experience having meaningful, healthy relationships.

sun sextile lilith (within 3.0°) in the 11H / chiron in the 11H

let me tell you, most of the people i’ve been friends with over the years, regardless of gender, hypersexualize the fuck out of me. especially the men i’ve been friends with, majority of them had feelings for me that i never reciprocated. i was actually friends with a girl in high school who’s moon fell in my 8H, and in hindsight she had a very unhinged, borderline obsession with me. she would speak to me, and get mad at me, as if we were in a relationship together, and did not understand any type of boundaries that you’re supposed to have with someone you’re friends with. i don’t hold it against her now as an adult, but we definitely don’t speak to each other anymore.

i’ve also encountered issues in regards to the relationships i've with women, mainly when i was younger though, the women i’m acquainted with now i have healthy, normal friendships with (thank god). but i’ve had friendships with girls where they secretly didn’t like me, they were secretly attracted to me, or both. and i don't mean this in a weird, misogynistic, "pick me i'm different!" type of way at all, this is just a pattern i picked up on with some of the women i've met throughout my life.

in regards to having chiron in my 11H, my sore spot is most definitely my friendships. on top of feeling misunderstood and objectified in the friendships i’ve had, i’ve also experienced trauma at the hands of people i thought were my friends. and i always do my best to exercise being mindful and self-aware, and i’m definitely not on some “i’ve always been the perfect friend and people hurt me regardless, boo-hoo, woe-is-me” type shit, because i’ve definitely hurt people in my lifetime. but in terms of how these placements have manifested, i’ve always encountered difficulty in connecting to others, and i’m just now getting to a point where i feel comfortable enough to even attempt to try making new friends again.

and this is what i mean when i say: astrology is a tool that you can use for shit that is more important than your appearance and future partner! it wasn’t until my 12H profection year when i started studying traditional astrology and learned how to read charts, that i actually began to understand myself on a deeper level and gained the confidence to end friendships that no longer served me and made new ones that actually do.

chiron in my 11H also makes me feel inclined to take on a “therapist” role in my friendships, something that can be good or bad depending on whether the boundaries are there or not. i tend to attract people who like to trauma dump on me (that’s my moon in the 8H influence too), and i have to actively put boundaries in place and make sure people around me understand that i have to be in the right mindset to hold space for them. there aren’t a lot of pisces sun stereotypes that i can relate to, but being an emotional sponge is definitely one that i can. unfortunately.

moon and ceres in virgo in the 8H

LMAOOO this one might be a little heavy. i apologize in advance. feel free to skip this one if you don’t want to hear about parental/maternal loss or my mommy issues <3

my relationship with my mom is without a doubt where a lot of my emotional avoidance comes from. that plus my moon being in the 8H makes me very guarded when it comes to emotional vulnerability, even with the people i’m closest to. without telling a bunch of strangers on the internet too much of my business, here are the sparknotes:

my home life growing up (and to this day lowkey) never felt stable

it never felt like i could feel my emotions without them “consuming” me, this was mainly an issue in my youth, i was around 12-years-old when i started going to therapy and taking antidepressants

my mom battled a chronic disease her entire life and passed away when i was a teenager

i’ve always craved to have deep, spiritual connections with people, and ever since i was a kid i’ve been extremely intuitive and had the ability to read a room and everyone in it without anyone having to speak, but i typically attract people who are either emotionally unavailable, or emotionally unstable in some way, probably because i come off as “closed off” on the surface.

in terms of my relationship with my mom, i love her but i could never be vulnerable with her about a damn thing, like i never really felt “heard” by her. she was a taurus sun, scorpio moon, with an aries stellium, as soon as she had her mind made up about something it didn’t really matter how i felt (pluto also falls in my 10H, and i definitely viewed her as an “authority figure” more than a mother at times). y’all remember this scene from lady bird where her mom tells her she wants her to “be the best version of herself she can be” and she asks “what if this is the best version?” - it was very much so that.

and i don’t want to give the impression that my mom didn’t love me because she definitely did. i think it was just a matter of what a lot of us eventually come to understand about our parents; that they’re products of the environments and the people they were raised by. and in my mom’s case, she did her best with the cards she was dealt and showed up the best way she could. it doesn’t make my feelings any less important, but it helps to maintain the balance between recognizing her humanity, and also validating my own frustration and trauma regarding our relationship.

venus conjunct ascendant in aquarius (2°40’)

i didn't wanna end this post on a depressing ass note so i'm adding this last aspect lmfao. honestly i struggle with some of the venusian energy in my chart because i honestly never really felt "pretty" growing up. it might be neptune in my 1H that effects my self image, because it wasn't until my 20s that i actually started to genuinely recognize my beauty. i feel like growing up i only viewed my beauty through the lens of the "male gaze" (it didn't help that i felt objectified from the boys around me), or through the lens of euro-centric/white beauty standards, and in adulthood i'm finally approaching the way that i view myself from my perspective.

i do notice that i attract people very easily, both in a friendly and romantic way. i know this aspect has to do a lot with love and romance, but honestly, i'm not too concerned about being in a relationship at this point in my life (with the way the economy is set up i think we all got bigger fish to fry rn but that's neither here nor there-), but like i mentioned i've always been an artist at heart and the art that i create plays a really big role in my identity. i've always found it easier to express myself through my paintings or my writing rather than my words.

aesthetics and comfortability are pretty big for me too, more so now in my 20s. this aspect has a lot to do with sociability and being inclined to uplift and help others, and i can relate to the latter but when it comes to other aspects in my chart i do struggle with being "outgoing" and coming across friendly, but we'll get to that in part two.

as always, if y'all have any of the aspects/placements mentioned in this post let me know how they manifest in your life and personality, and if you have any insight or questions in general feel free to reach out!

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saltydkdan · 7 months

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Hello Salt man! You seem like an unhinged enough weeb for this question:

I’m going to be the president of the anime club in my highschool this year and have no fucking idea what I should do for activities and shit.

Any ideas? If not, that’s perfectly fine too!

(Also thank you for reblogging my Peppy drawing it made my day ^^)

No problem! I loved the art

I think it’s pretty obvious for an Anime club to watch Anime, however that shit is basic, and I have some unhinged ideas.

Trivia (the least unhinged)

—Make a trivia game on PowerPoint, or on Kahoot that feature questions based on various popular anime. Get specific and weird for the harder questions.

Anime Debate Club

—(be careful with this one because depending on the group it may get heated lol)

—At the end of a meeting, choose to random anime characters

—Tell members that they can pick sides on which of the two would win in a fight, then between meetings, bring together their arguments for why, they have to have actual citation and examples of the character’s powers, or reference specific canon material

—Bonus points if one of the debate teams puts together a PowerPoint slideshow on a character’s power set, or the other characters weaknesses

—Have a judge award points for valid arguments, but have them be cracked out of their minds about it (For example, awarding points to “Comedy” characters, like if an Osumatsu-San character surviving a Ki blast could be funny? That’s a point towards them. LMAO)

NOTES: Obviously the characters chosen cannot be Goku, Vegeta, Saitama, or in general overpowered characacters. Also, having completely fucking insane match ups, or wildly specific match ups is recommended. Like Bobobo VS Dio Brando from Jojo. Or General Tao from Dragon Ball VS Gojo.

If the fight is extremely one sided, just make a list of all the ways that one side would fucking dominate because that shit is fucking funny LOL.

Weekly Book Club but for anime

—This isn’t really “unhinged” but I recently did a manga book club with friends weekly and it was super cool to meet up and discuss the chapters of a particular series and such

—You can do this for anime and assign a set number of episodes, OR do manga and provide a way to read it online

—Rotate out series every so often so people don’t feel like they’re focusing all their attention to a single series the entirety of the year

—This could be a fun thing to do casually between meetings and to talk about a little at the start

Pitch your favorite

—Have people make a short presentation on PowerPoint to pitch their favorite series that’s 3-5 minutes each, or whatever depending on how many people you have

—If you wanna make it funny make it so they HAVE to include both Pros, AND Cons about it. (Like for One Piece: PRO would be the amazing worldbuilding, and a CON would be that Oda cannot draw women)

Make an Epic OC

—Force people to design OCs for a specific series for that week. If they can draw and want to, they can draw them. If they can’t draw? Make it a stick figure, or a shitty drawing a child would make. And have them make a small write up about the character and their powers.

—This can easily be taken seriously, or just have them make an overpowered self insert, all of it is fine

Anyway that’s all my ideas! Hope this helps or inspires some of your own unhinged ideas

#saltydkdan #salty asks #anime club #anime

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robogart · 8 months

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Watching my friend play baldur's gate 3 and it's been very fun but now I have been spite-inspired to draw fat Shadowheart because we should see a person who looks like they could actually feasibly one-hand a mace and a big shield with their counterweight and not be an anime-waifu, ariana grande ponytail, tiny person with a mcguffin and no character depth. OOF can you tell my feelings for this character or what???? (She also just sounds SO young, and the fact that she's so small like??? ughhhhh it just feels gross) (granted, I'm not super into a lot of the writing for most of the characters - especially the women - but alas.... = _ =;;)

I just hmmmmmmmm not here for this edgelord I'm Not Like Other Girls energy. You CAN be a character who is unlikeable and interesting - I DO love that. But she feels like she has no actual personhood? And don't blame that on the memory wipe, because if you took out a chunk of memories, there would just be floating emotion without any context, and that in itself is SO disturbing for a person to deal with? Let's see her UNHINGED, holding on by a THREAD, to the lifeline that is this evil god that she worships and this directive/mission she has. Instead she's just....there. Ugh - I'm just not 100 into the writing in the game and the women just feel very blandly written and delivered and it's Too Bad, as usual.

Anyways....fat babe shadowheart coming soon 👏💖

#my friend and i feel like we're taking crazy pills but here we are #we CAN'T be alone in feeling this right??? are we insane???#bg3 thoughts

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katasstrophy · 1 year

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I feel like I've seen every Bluelock boy paired with a very cute, very bubbly, and chill gf/reader before, but I haven't seen any of them paired with a cool and competent or even bossier type. Are there any guys you think of liking that type??? Or maybe just deserve that type to be kept in line lmao 🤣

nonnie!! 😳 NONNIE UR BRAIN I’M GIVING IT A THOUSAND KISSES UR SOOO RIGHT FOR THIS!!! i guess it doesn’t really show with the fics i’ve uploaded so far – which is a damn shame, i should fix that – but i am absolutely all for readers who are just… out there, ya know? they’re prickly, or easy to anger, or sardonic as all hell, or way too clever for their own good or yes yes, bossy<3 i eat that shit UP like it’s my last meal. this is not to say i don’t enjoy sweet, bubbly readers (bc i do!) but the type you describe just… scratches a certain itch iykwim 👁️👁️

i think one of my first posts ever about blue lock on this blog (cw. mid writing LMAO) was exactly about this. obviously most of the blue lock guys are only extreme egoists when they’re playing soccer, but i do think that aspect of their lives will ultimately start to bleed into their personality as they grow up/go pro. so having someone who’s just like “yeah that’s great and all but if you won’t make it to date night i’ll leave your sorry ass” is just. so sexy to them like?? they haven’t gotten their ego knocked down a peg in a while so i think they’d be drawn to a partner like that askdhxnbz idk if i’m explaining this very well but as far as i’m concerned all blue lock boys deserve an unhinged reader lol 😤

THAT BEING SAID!!! >:))) i have a top three list of blue lock men who i, personally, would love to put in their place and encourage anyone out there to do so as well LOL

1. MICHAEL KAISER — this cocky motherfucker ugh need i say more 🙄 the urge to censor his name was real strong but i persevered still cannot believe i’m (sadly) attracted to this horrible, horrible man. he’s sooo insufferable and just so obsessed with himself like he unironically refers to himself as the emperor when i tell you there’s nothing i want more than to make this man beg on his knees i mean it – what a pretty sight that would be hm? <3 all his past lovers probably treated him like he was god’s greatest gift to women (HE IS NOT) – and by now he’s not only used to it but comes to expect it – so when he meets you and you’re like “mm you’re kind of a prick leave me alone thenk yew✨✨” he’s just. so scandalized LMFAO suddenly he’s the one chasing after you and vying for a shred of your attention oooohh yes that’s exactly what he deserves how it should be

2. ITOSHI SAE — listen he might be my precious babygirl now but i used to hate this mans guts like no other and that little resentment still lives on in my heart in the form of wanting this man’s downfall to be a woman like don’t tell me that’s not the hottest thing you’ve ever heard. he’s just so single-mindedly focused on soccer – japan’s treasure and what not – and thinks he can get away with being an asshole because of it but you place down your foot and tell him to cut the bullshit or you’ll find someone who treats you better (AMEN SISTER) and suddenly he’s grappling with the reality that shit he might just fall apart without you yes girl make him suffer

3. OLIVER AIKU — i couldn’t not include the resident fuckboy here mmmm the possibilities for him are endless and each one more delicious than the last. he might not be as insufferable as the others but he still thinks extremely highly of himself, especially when it comes to his way with the ladies. typical “oh no i don’t do relationships” kinda guy who can show you a good time for a night before dipping in the morning – and you just don’t want that. so you reject his advances, say you’re not interested and move on, but for some reason, oliver can’t. literally physically wounds his pride when he crawls back for a second chance but you don’t budge, still wary of him due to his past behavior unless he can show you otherwise. and the way he scrambles to prove himself as trustworthy to you? god tier groveling from a man YUMM

#—ping! new message from (anon)#AKSHHDJD THIS GOT SO LONG AND RAMBLY AGAIN SORRY!!#but you have a fat juicy brain on you nonnie #idk if this is exactly what you wanted but these are the thoughts that jumped out so hope that’s okay!! <3 #blue lock x reader #—bllk.thoughts!

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justthewayuare · 7 months

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About mothers

Only Friends is a show about young chaotic (mostly)gays so it’s definitely not a show I expected a discussion about abortions and reproductive rights from. It’s clearly not their theme and I get it.

But still there is a very careful and insightful approach to it and I do appreciate now the writing team depicted on that. I talk about Sand and Ray and the difference we see with their mothers.

Sand mom isn’t a perfect parent - and it’s fine, cause parents are still people and people aren’t perfect. She is a bit unhinged and irresponsible, for sure. She has a questionable job in society’s eyes (can you see how my own eyes are rolling on that), she has debts her son is paying and she thinks it’s a good idea to use that for birthday surprise.

But she is loving, caring and supportive. She clearly gave Sand all the most important things a child needs from their parents. We can see how they love each other, how they trust each other and this is beautiful relationship. She is a good mom.

And I can’t get over a fact how supportive she was towards Ray - a boy she only met - did Ray ever get that kind of attention from his own mother?

And Sand was an unexpected pregnancy. She chose to keep him and he became the love of her life, and this is beautiful and touching. And while it lays with the common agenda that unwanted pregnancy always leads to wanted child, this show proves it wrong right away.

Cause, yes, it can be that way. It is that way for Sand’s mother. But it can be way different from that.

Ray’s mom also kept an unwanted child. But it didn’t lead to her being happy with him. It led to postpartum depression she never won over. Her son meant for her crushing of all her dreams and ambitions. And of course it’s not his fault. It’s not her fault either. That just happens sometimes - women not always mean or want to be mothers.

I don’t speak Thai and English is not my native language but I find it so interesting what praising Sand and Ray use in that scene.

Sand says: she didn’t expect me. Ray says: she was knocked up. Much ruder language with underlying meaning “I became her misery”.

So yes, sometimes - and pretty often I think - decision to keep an unwanted child can lead to great and happy relationship.

But sometimes it can ruin woman’s life.

And it will also harm the life of her child. And while it is possible to learn to live with that, it will never disappear.

It’s not my (or anyones) place to judge or say what would be right or wrong in those situations. But I do appreciate the show for giving us two such different real life experiences. Not depicting on one or another, just telling that life is different for everyone. Situations are different. And same choices can lead to very different outcomes.

I guess you never know, right?

#ofts #only friends the series #only friends meta #only friends

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hanasnx · 1 year

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stop because i literally thought this was just me being completely utterly weird but knowing that there’s someone out there that thinks the same thing is literally so relieving, like yes?? anakin is and would be “gross” when he’s having sex?? and omg and dropping hot wax on him?? i loved all of what you said, we need more “gross”anakin.

thank you for coming to my Ted talk.💗

(btw I’m talking about you “scratching the surface” with anakin’s other kinks)

val it’s so real it’s practically canon.

like i absolutely know padme (who’s not prudish by any means & even if she was that’d be fine) was barely keeping up with her husbands sex drive and kinks. but the man knows how to lay the meanest pipe so i just know she loved being along for the ride 🤷‍♂️

sometimes some of the gross stuff i write for him i don’t even write it as a “this is gonna be so hot” it’s literally like “yea ani would do this and probably be into it” like i really try to stay true to his character and he thinks it’s hot. whether or not i do or you do is subjective. the reader in the fic is always gonna reflect ani’s sense of adventure and therefore be into what he’s into for the sake of storytelling

i have a series of unarticulated thoughts on anakin’s so-called “grossness” and i try to sprinkle them in evenly throughout my work. but since u asked for more, i’ll give you a list

let’s talk more about anakin’s disgusting habits under the cut

warnings: f pronouns + anatomy, dead dove do not eat for sexually and potentially triggering explicit themes. things such as feet stuff, butt stuff, armpit stuff, pregnant/breeding/lactation kink, titfuck. mommy/daddy kink, mentioned vomit from gagging on cock & cleaning it off & face fucking, slight dubcon, sadism, dacryphilia, piss kink, blood consumption

☥ he’s so impulsive, so eager to act on a whim. unapologetically gross

☥ ani is treading pretty dangerously close to a foot fetish bcos it’s part of “his worship” for reader. and he would 100% “floss your toes with his tongue” and he’d tell reader that to their face too

☥ would make out w your ear tbh.

use tongue when he kisses you on places that are supposedly chaste. your hand or your cheek or your forehead during goodbye. what’s the point? he doesn’t know. he wants to taste the sweat on your skin

☥ he eats ass like a starving man and he loves when it’s done to him too. he doesn’t even fuckin care istg he loves ass. he loves fingering it while he’s fucking your pussy, he loves fisting it, fucking it, making you wear cute jeweled butt plugs. he wants to fist your pussy too but that’s not nearly as easy as your perfect asshole

☥ unhinged enough to lick & suck your armpits. sweaty or not. part of his insatiable need to have touched/licked every reachable inch of your body no matter how unorthodox. the possession in him

☥ my friend (i’d tag them but i didn’t know if they’d want to be tied to this piece of info 💀) once said “he wants to live inside your skin” and she was 100% right

☥ shamelessly attracted to pregnant women & milfs & tits. the mommy issues on this kid is out of this world. he wants you to take care of him like you’re his mom and i mean that. and he also wants to fuck you. he’s so fucked up. if you made dinner for him? in nothing but an apron? he’d call you mommy and eat whatever you made right off of you

☥ breeding. we all know it, it’s been done before a thousand times. anakin’s the king of the breeding kink. but i’d like to say some more about it.

if you’re pregnant, he’s constantly trying to fuck you. you’re like “my love, can you grab me that? i’m in a lot of pain right now i can’t—

immediately, he’s asking: “you want me to fuck you too? it might relieve some of the pressure. i read somewhere..”

he’s practically vibrating sitting next to you thinking about how he— him— he put babies inside you. h i m.

god and if you let him have you?? he goes crazy

he’s like grabbing your hair and licking up the length of your spine and saying shit like, “gotta make sure right? gotta make sure… you’re gonna take it all… my little wife.”

and

“i did this to you, didn’t i? say it, baby, who got you fucking pregnant? fuck, your tits are gonna get so fucking big. you’re gonna let daddy milk you, right?” cos that lactation kink is so real too

he’d honestly wanna fuck your tits while they’re full of milk. watch your nips drool milk all over yourself and his dick while it’s nestled so tight in between em. you’re practically crying from the oversensitivity which is just an added plus for him.

part of the pregnancy kink is definitely the thrill of almost forcing you to have his children.. going bareback and bein like “you ready for another one? let’s make another. if it doesn’t take this time, we’ll keep doing it. i’ll give you my cum as many times as it takes, yeah? you fucking love it.” after you literally just had one of his children bcos he’s selfish and cruel and tyrannical and gets off to shit like this

☥ after a blowjob he wants you to swish and gargle his load. open your mouth so he can spit in it and make you mix it in. watch you as you swallow it and probe your mouth with his tongue to taste the remnants

☥ piss kink. he has it. he wants it both ways. something about watching you kneel in front of him to get pissed on makes him feel so superior. disgustingly superior. telling you how good you are sitting so pretty for him while he pisses on you. you’re so dirty for liking it. might make you drink it depending bcos he’s def had yours—

☥ making you practically vomit on his cock from fucking your throat so deep. swells with pride when you lick it off of him like a good girl. he loves seeing you gag and choke and lurch. the way your throat looks closing up and how your body surges from the involuntary movement. it makes him moan and fuck your mouth like a pussy. as hard as he can.

☥ twisting and pulling and flicking your clit and nips. slapping your pussy. tugging at your folds. simply bcos of his sick fascination to put you through so much for his own sexual satisfaction. don’t worry he expects the same from you.

☥ he’d lick and drink your blood in the right circumstances tbfh. if he broke the skin on you somewhere he’d lick the wound

☥ he wants to watch you hopelessly fuck so many things for him. for him, specifically. not you. for him. he wants you to put on a show for him. to redden and whine and cry bcos whatever thing (which is most likely not a toy, and something not meant to be stuck up your ass or pussy. that stretches it too wide or whatever other reason) just isn’t working and it’s not getting you where you need to be. and you beg for him to help you. to let you stop. but he doesn’t. not yet anyway

☥ seriously,,, there is so little i don’t see this boy doing ,,, there’s definitely more but this is just what i had on hand. 🥵🥵 i love anakin’s disgusting side. disgusting is an understatement. he needs a stronger word

#dead dove do not eat #anakin skywalker headcanons #ch: anakin #foreverburningstar #thanks for the msg!!#indy: headcanons #reader insert #x f!reader #x fem!reader #x female!reader #anakin #anakin skywalker smut #anakin skywalker x reader #wife!reader #anakin skywalker #anakin skywalker kinks #subby anakin

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bunnakit · 5 months

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last twilight ep 5 thoughts feelings etc.

eyy actually watched this earlier and rewatching it, so things should be a little less feral and unhinged. actually took notes my first watch through as well (wtf am i doing)

once again i love how stories are our constant companions in this show. i love how they keep playing with the parallels between worlds, it's one of my absolute favorite things in storytelling.

i love the fact that day is now 'invisible' in the world of badminton but he can still experience all of the joy of the game by supporting his friends. badminton was such a big part of his life and he doesn't have to leave it all behind, he just experiences it a little differently now.

film is so fucking pretty even covered in 'sweat.' i do love the show let her be 'sweaty' and disheveled instead of having perfect hair and make up after what was clearly a hard game. GIVE ME SWEATY WOMEN. (god im so gay)

so i said it last week but the only time we've ever seen mhok be violent is when he's been protecting the people close to him. (his garage bro, porjai x 2, etc) and we see him ready to do it again when august confronts day. there is no doubt in my mind that mhok was fully prepared to bury that bitch for even daring to make day the slightest bit afraid.

and god how scary does that have to be? you can't see, you're already nervous to be here, and suddenly someone is shouting at you - and maybe you don't recognize them at first because you haven't heard their voice in over a year but all you know is they're coming closer and they're so angry. i can't imagine anything scarier than that.

ahh, a broken picture frame representing a broken bond, an absolute classic metaphor. an oldie but a goodie.

once again i love that we see day's rage. anger really is such a big part of coming to terms with being disabled. i got some bad news a few weeks ago about my own disease and i've spent the last few weeks so angry and frustrated and then just sad. it's such a complex journey and the show is doing an absolutely brilliant job of showing that.

i do owe day's family a small smidgen of an apology since day is the one that asked it to be kept a secret, HOWEVER, i do think that conversation should have been revisited after a fucking year. how long were they just going to let him live in isolation? like cool for respecting his agency, not cool for letting him waste away in a tomb of his own making.

FINALLY WE GET MHOK OPENING UP.

so here's the thing with mhok. i love him. no - the real thing is i see so much of myself in him. my friends and family constantly get frustrated with me because i will never tell them when something is wrong or when i'm shouldering a lot of emotions about something. when i got the bad news about my disease i hid in my office and cried at my desk and then cleaned myself up and pretended nothing happened. fuck, i feel like i understand mhok on such a deep level.

not to get too into it but my own habits stem from neglect in my formative years, and i have to wonder if mhok's behavior maybe stems from his isolation in prison? oftentimes people with these behavior patterns will self isolate, either deal with or bury their emotions, and then emerge back into their friend group as if nothing happened. (am i talking about myself again? shhh.) mhok didn't really have a choice - sure you can write letters, have visitors, but a large part of his day was probably handling his grief in solitude. he's probably gotten so good at "handling it" and pushing everything down and dealing with everything in silence that he doesn't know how to handle it any other way now.

to make things worse, it happened over a year ago. he probably feels like he should be "over it" and not make it a big deal. maybe i'm projecting just a smidge (just a lot) but i do think it's something interesting to keep in mind. either way, him finally talking about rung to day is fucking MASSIVE, both for their relationship and mhok's emotional wellbeing.

august is fucking king of mixed signals and i don't super like that he looked for mhok's permission to lead day through the court. why the fuck are you looking at mhok when you could just ask day? if you look closely, as mhok is letting go day curls his fingers around the hand that mhok uses to remove his hand from his arm.

i do love we see mhok pushing day a little more out of his comfort zone as he did in earlier episodes.

porjai is so fucking pretty. is there anything more attractive than a woman in shorts and an oversized band tee? no. no there is not.

and again we see how much time and effort mhok has put into being day's caretaker - and his friend. he did research and learned methods that would make dining out easier for day. i love him so much! i don't know how day could still be thinking about august after that adorable little date.

UGH OKAY SO. HERE'S WHERE WE GET INTO MY BIG FEELINGS.

in my opinion, the theme of this episode has been "being late." here's why.

the boys were very nearly, or were, late to gee's badminton game

you could consider mhok 'late' to tell day about rung

day thinks he's too late to confess to august

mhok realizes he's come into day's life too late to receive his affection

and then we have august's literal late arrival (i still dont know what fucking game this jackass is playing)

this also ties in to a little trend i've been noticing in regards to mhok that oftentimes he's too late in life.

he was too late to save rung, and learned of her death late

he was too late to receive the mechanic job as it had 'already been given to someone else'

he was a late arrival to the interview to become day's caretaker

and again, he's entered day's life too late to receive his affection (or so he thinks)

i genuinely don't know if this is intentional, but i think it's something interesting to draw connections to.

anyway, again, i dont know what the fuck august's deal is but i can tell you if i was day i'd be getting over my feelings for him real fucking quick. i don't super like that august shows up, hears about day's feelings, and asks mhok to keep his being there a secret - but i do understand it and i do understand mhok's side of things. i don't think he does it out of his own selfishness, i think rather he realizes august likely doesn't return day's affection and letting him think august didn't show up is possibly the kinder of the two scenarios. (my only hope is we don't see august return and try to woo day or something later with this knowledge)

i do love that mhok stayed. he was concerned and it might seem a little overbearing but day was clearly nervous for this outing and all in all it's good that he stayed. and then he made sure to salvage the evening for day and take him out on a proper date. maybe it's not the date day wanted but it looks like he had a great time (perhaps even a better time) spending a day with someone he could relax and be himself around.

flowers have so many different meanings across cultures and tbh i'm far to tired to dig into the thai meaning of hydrangeas (if there are any) but i do think hydrangeas are neat. this is prob common knowledge but the color of hydrangea petals is determined by the ph balance in the soil they're grown in. (blue hydrangeas grow in soil with a ph balance of 5.2-5.5, far more in the base range than red hydrangeas that grow in a ph balance of 6.0-6.2, and once the soil reaches acidic levels it tends to produce pink flowers) i guess maybe if you wanted you could draw a connection to how malleable mhok is becoming and how his environment is changing him.

scientifically, sunflowers are also an interesting flower because they are often used to heal damaged and irradiated soil. they're so fucking resilient and help heal the world around them. i think there's a lot of connections we can make there with both mhok and day, regardless of flower symbolism and going purely on science.

anyway sorry to be a science nerd.

that's all ive really got for this episode, i say, as if i have not written you all a novel. this show continues to make me feel so much and tickle my brain in such a delightful way. between this and moonlight chicken p'aof has definitely made me a fan for life.

tag loves: @benkaaoi | @callipigio | @lookwhatihave (once again pls always feel free to lmk if you want to be added or removed)

#bunn meta #last twilight #last twilight the series #mhokday #ltts meta

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dormarunt · 4 months

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Berlin, episode 1 - a spoiler-filled live reaction/commentary

Spoilers ahoy under the cut!

Our man wears a turtleneck from the get-go, which I find hilarious.

"This is my team - one of the three I've robbed with in my life - but this one is special to me as it's from my golden age". Maybe season 2 - if it exists - will focus on that other team? Or? The other 2 teams are The Cormorants and the Mint gangs? What do you guys think?

Also this is set before Berlin knew of his Helmers Myopathy (lol I took Liberties in my latest fic, I won't let something like canon change that)

Roi sees him as the father he never had, while Berlin sees Roi as "a loyal dog he walks every day" -- right, I'm totally going to write these two, and not just because Roi calls him "sir" and shines his shoes.

Damien is a Professor but for real.

During the first heist we see of the gang, a random guest clocks the team as "not police " in about a minute, seemingly based on Keyla's glasses/fidgeting -- okay I guess?? Make that conflict, Pina & Co!

Also iirc Berlin pulls out a bag to put the stolen artifact out of his ass thin air.

Losing my mind at the smashed phone bit though, the panto is chef's kiss. (points pinky)

Berlin has TERRIBLE gun etiquette/safety OMG???

"Love doesn't last", says the three-times-divorcee. Believe him, before he marries two more times and unhinges his jaw to eat his beat friend's face.

"What name did you choose?" "Cameron" -- the old gang's names are also chosen.

Pedro Alonso learned French for this okay? And he did a fine job ngl, much better than his Danish of S5.

Keyla is (at least partially) a plot device/Deus Ex literal Machina with her generating 650 pages of content about their made-up archeological gang ---- hopefully priest dude doesn't know how to double check stuff like awards because then Keyla would have to ~hack loads of sites/databases okay I'll stop but seriously

He calls himself Berlin already. How or why? Unclear yet.

Based on the iPod shuffle that Keyla's wearing the series takes place after 2010-2012 (so before he met Martin according to the little timeline I made a while ago)

The Berlin-Roi talk about a particular woman (Cameron) gives me Berlin-RIO (heheh) talk about Tokio

Oh no tell the guy who lusts over a girl to act as her dad instead - that's going to go WELL

The door hacking (Panasonic) device with Matrix-style flowing numbers and letters is PRIMO and not hilarious at all. (Rafael's hacking device was marginally more believable)

Three home invaders vs one angry little pup - I'm in the pup's corner!

Not a huge fan of Cameron just yet, she gives me Tokio vibes and not in a good way. She IS hot though.

Come on Cameron, when a guy says not to touch his ass you don't take it personally?? Girl, that's not cute irl. If you wanna help him open that lock, warn him. Touching people without their consent is No Bueno. I get that she's supposed to be mentally ill but bit a creep?

Berlin is possibly an insomniac. He's not changed from the Berlin I know and love in that he feels that: 1) he's in any position to give advice, let alone about love 2) he knows all about love his experiences are universal

(I trust Damian's take on love and kinda agree with him)

OMG THERE WAS ONLY ONE BED!!! --- and Berlin said "ew no?"

Oh Jesus Christ we were spared from another poop particle conversation but just barely (since when is the guy who fucks in stench-filled basements all squeamish?)

Period-inappropriate Imagine Dragons cover

That's why I started learning the guitar in high school, this scene right here, to have someone look at me with that wonder in their eyes. (all the boys learned to play guitar to pick up girls, years later I figured out that so did I lol)

The sights in this episode are beautiful though! <3

Berlin's philosophy on courting women is, according to my headcanon, stolen from Martín who's "an infantry general by vocation" and NO ONE can change my mind

Roi's sincere WTF look here is priceless

All in all - yep, i'm watching the rest too (lol). Can't guarantee live reactions for the next episodes (unless requested/I have the time)

#lcdp berlin #berlin 2023 #Berlin netflix #Berlin spoilers #Pedro Alonso #LCDP Berlin #i prob typed names all wrong ;__; and I apologize

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jell0buss-37 · 10 months

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My Peter B headcannons!

General HCs, however I will take requests for different HCs (only for Headcannons rn though 👀)

He's a reporter rather than a physicist in his universe.

He was probably more of a jock type, who knew more about sports. When he got bitten he got more active, but never played any team sports because he was still scared of his bullies.

He had asthma before he was bitten.

He loves the color blue, but specifically navy blue.

Loves classic rock, but like 70s sort of classic rock, so definitely more of a Kinks, Rolling Stones, Queen sorta fan.

In his Universe, Harry was his Green Goblin.

He's very emotional.

He is a HUGE horror movie buff.

Is actually a very big bookworm, especially mystery books. Growing up he was a big Sherlock Holmes fan.

His parents were actually alive, but they couldn't take care of him, and so they sent him to live with his Aunt and uncle when he was 5.

He's actually from Nebraska.

He's not a fan of his birthday, so he never makes a big deal about it.

Also gets butthurt when nobody makes a big deal about it.

His universes Gwen was actually a babysitter he had a fat crush on when he was 9. She was 8 years older than him.

He likes funny women, it makes his stomach flip whenever a spunky woman can joke with him.

More of a grease monkey than a lab rat, however he somehow is and actual whizz when it comes to many subjects. Except for Arts of any sort. He actually is not creative at all.

He has the most useless facts stored in his head, it can literally be the most out of pocket thing ever, and yet doesn't know basic things.

"Did you know that Pelicans can pull their spines through their unhinged jaws to cool off?" ".... Peter wha-"

"What do pelicans eat?" "Idk, broccoli?"

He can't sing or dance for the life of him.

But he can play the harmonica

And he likes colorful drinks. Alcoholic drinks or not.

That and Root Beer

An absolute Mug Root beer fiend

Also really good at video games, doesn't matter what game, he picks it up so fast

Looks like big dumb, but really that's just him not caring.

Has a fear of Michael Cera.

"Where are his eyebrows???"

Is literally just Nick Miller, actually.

He's a cat dad

His cat's name is Tyler

"I am sick of Tyler just jumping into the shower and getting freaked out and scratching me-" "Woah, WHAT?? Like your roommate!?" "No. My cat. Why would my roommate attack me-"

Uses punctuation when he texts so you can never tell what tone he's using when he texts

'omw now want me to get u smth from the store'

'No. Drive safe.' (so menacing???)

Has a Ned in his universe that is his office buddy at the Daily Bugle

Ned is an intern and he and Peter have horror movie marathons, and he is also an artist

Peter can't drive. Also he's literally Spiderman so that doesn't matter anyway. But if you ask him, he will not know how to drive. He fixes cars, doesn't drive them.

Never went to college, but got a degree in quantum physics online

That and a wedding licence as spiderman. He thought it'd be funny if Spider-Man could officiate weddings

Is actually scared of kids until Miles

After Miles, he is so good with kids

In his mind

Is writing his own book about a detective from New Orleans (iykyk)

Is Irish-Italian

Likes Baseball a lot because it reminds him of his Uncle Ben

His universe doesn't have reality TV

He's also a DM for Ned's DND group

Totally LARPs, but doesn't admit it

Doesn't like Apple sauce and hasn't eaten it since he was 8 because he ate too much of it and threw it up

Genuinely loves his friends interests, and will genuinely try them out or watch whatever it is they like so they can gush together or debate

Has a barber shop he goes to where he just talks with the old men there, he's been going since he was 12 because Uncle Ben took him

Can Bake really good and sew because of May

He actually asked her to teach him these skills

Has a dream to live in the Oscar Meyer Weiner mobile one day

#fanfiction #peter benjamin parker #spiderman x reader #spiderman #peter b parker #peter b parker x reader #general headcanons

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wanda-maximoff-enthusiast · 2 years

Note

Hello! I saw that you said your requests for The Hobbit were open, which made me very excited because I love your writing style so much. May I please request for you to write something with Gandalf telling Thorin & Co. he’s adding someone to the company and them being very annoyed, and then Mr. Gandalf—in his infinite wisdom—referring to y/n as “she” and them flipping the frickity frick out because women are fragile and dainty and need to be protected (cue eye roll). Then upon meeting her, she’s a wee bit unhinged and wild and overall just Morally Gray Slightly Insane Badass? I’m thinking of Harley Quinn’s fight scenes from Bird of Prey where she’s just super kickass and efficient, slamming people into the ground and twirling her bat around like a baton.

I’m sorry if this is too specific! I’d love to see what you would do with this prompt. You can add any pairings you would like. If it doesn’t interest you, then I respect that, feel free to ignore! Thank you!

THIS IS ABSOLUTE PERFECTION I think we need a little bit more badass (Y/N), come on guys

But yes, absolutely. This looks like it should have a part two, so if anybody wants that lemme know.

~Her~

the company x fem!reader (platonic)

Summary: Gandalf is adding somebody new to the company (albeit without telling Thorin), and the company are shocked when he lets one little pronoun slip.

Warnings: A bit of sexism (the dwarves think all women are quite meek and dainty), (Y/N) is an absolute girlboss so prepare for that

A/N: I'm rewatching the Hobbit atm. kili >>>>>>

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Gandalf towered over the dwarves - and Bilbo - as he spoke rapidly to try and avoid the orcs within a nearby fortress. "I think now would be best to tell you of the newest member of the company."

The dwarves looked at each other, suspicious of the wizard's intentions. Thorin's dark brows furrowed above his eyelids.

"Go on." He said, voice firm and demanding.

"Well, I believe this person will be a very good addition. A trained fighter, a little crazy, albeit, but still a useful asset."

Thorin's crystal eyes glared at Gandalf.

"And how much of this did you care to inform me of?"

"Thorin, I assure you, this is all going to work out-"

"Can we, like, not be doing this right now? In a few seconds, a whole army of orcs is going to burst through those doors." Fili spoke up, pulling two daggers from his pockets.

Kili nodded at his brother's words. "Yeah, just cut to the chase, what does this 'new member' go by?"

"Well, if I am correct, her-"

An uproar of 'her?' and 'what is he on about's erupted from the dwarves, all of them waving their weapons mockingly, before Thorin raised a hand to silence them.

"You're trying to sabotage us." "Thorin-" "A woman? Really?" Gandalf's gaze averted to the fortress, listening intently of any sign of destruction, as Thorin continued ranting angrily.

"Women do not fight, they are more accustomed to sewing needles than they are swords, why would you- what in Mahal's name are you looking at?" The dwarf king turned, as did the rest of the company, to see the orc fortress burst into flames.

Fire covered the entire structure, but even in the blazing embers and smoke they could see a figure walking towards them.

"Who is that?" Oin asked, tilting his head to get a better look at the person walking.

Gandalf smirked a knowing smile as he watched the dwarves' awe.

"That, Master Oin, is the newest member of the company. I would like you to meet (Y/N) (L/N)."

Everybody watched in pure shock as (Y/N) walked towards them, twirling a bat in her hand as if it weighed nothing, a sinister laugh falling from her lips.

"H-Her?" Bilbo asked, the hobbit clearly rather intimidated by this strange human, to which Gandalf sent him a comforting smile.

Finally, she stopped in front of them, blowing a large pink bubble with her gum before popping it with her teeth and chewing it, mouth open in a wide grin.

"Her." She said, leaning on her bat as if it were an arm rest. Mahal, this journey just got a lot more interesting.

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SORRY THIS IS ALSO SUPER OVERDUE AHH

#the hobbit x reader #the hobbit #the company x reader #thorin oakenshield x reader

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marimayscarlett · 1 month

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I think Hugo and Richard need to work together.

Hi my dear 🤍 and thank you for throwing yet another opportunity in my direction to talk about my main and my side-obession in one post 👀

Please hold the line, I need to process my immense love for men venturing out into fruity/feminine fashion, I'll be right with you 😀

Ok, now that's better 👌🏼

I think so too! And maybe they would get along well. You will laugh, but my delusional mind immediately draws some similarities between them (eventhough they have pretty different characters) - most likely just because they're both artists and I have a thing for them, but still.

Both Richard and Hugo were determined to become an artist from an early age on - Richard telling others as a child that he'll become a rockstar when he grows up, Hugo stepped foot out of school and went straight into acting school without looking back. While both being immensely successful in their respective careers - Richard having world wide success with Rammstein and is filling stadiums year after year now, Hugo quite literally hopping from one modern classic to the next (Lord of the Rings, Matrix, The Hobbit, V for Vendetta, Priscilla and more), both make indications that they kind of prefere the quieter/more simpler surroundings. Richard emphasizing several times how he would like to do a more toned down stage performance to give the music more space (I have an ask about it here), Hugo prefering smaller sets more than the immense big ones like LotR and Matrix and finds a lot of joy in theater acting (more raw and direct than movies). Both really live for their familys - in the linked interview Hugo mentiones he would gladly give his career up for his family and rather stays in Australia than to move closer to Hollywood (which he isn't a big fan of anyway), Richard moving back to Berlin to ensure a proper surrounding for the upbringing of his child as well as gathers his loved ones around him a lot.

And especially, both are extremely passionate about their work and can get quite intense about it, and while watching and reading interviews, you can immediately recognize their drive and passion. Which ultimatively is one of the things I absolutely love in people the most, and draws me to them most of the time 😊

And they are kind of a tiny bit connected! 'Du hast' was included on the soundtrack of the first Matrix movie (only on CD, not in the movie itself) in which Hugo played the infamous role of Agent Smith.

In a parallel universe, like in a 'Richard ventures out as a producer and cinema-lover into the world of movies'-AU (producing a movie, writing music for it, etc.), maybe they really could work together 😅 And Hugo once mentioned that he really likes Berlin due to the vast amount of different theaters the city has to offer 😊

Oh, and some more compelling arguments in my eyes regarding silly similarities (mentioning them just because i can):

Both have no problem dressing up in women's clothing and seemingly find a LOT of joy in it (like you already shown so beautifully in your ask 🙏🏼):

Both also have absolutely no problem going all in when it comes to kissing their male counterparts:

And both have an ass that won't quit, this is beside the point but still:

(gif sources: x, x)

All in all, thank you for coming to my delusional TED Talk about the several connections between my two favourites I made up in my unhinged little mind 🤝🏼

#ask #a long post. yet again. which most likely nobody will read but i have so much fun writing my silly little brains out on here #thank you so much for enabling me YET AGAIN #SORRY DEAR MUTUALS i will not shut up about these two in the near future #richard kruspe #Rammstein #hugo weaving

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echo-echo31 · 5 days

Text

fave lyrics from all songs + commentary because I need to SAY THINGS part 1

1. Fortnight - "your wife waters flowers, I wanna kill her" (babe this is illicit affairs but unhinged I love it)

2. The Tortured Poets Department - "You left your typewriter at my apartment, Straight from the tortured poets department, Who else decodes you?" (mecore mecore MECORE LETS GO)

3. My Boy Only Breaks His Favourite Toys - "Once I fix me, he's gonna miss me" (thinking of Diane and the revenge dress rn)

4. Down Bad - "Fuck it if I can't have him" (hopeless romantic me loves this in a problematic way)

5. So Long, London - "You swore that you loved me, but where were the clues? I died at the altar waitin' for proof" (ough)

6. But Daddy I Love Him - "I'm havin' his baby. No, I'm not, but you should see your faces" (fuckin snarky 4th wall taylor I love you)

7. Fresh Out The Slammer - "To the one who says I'm the girl of his American Dreams" (although this song is not about positive love I am biased about this line)

8. Florida!!! - "Little did you know your home's really only a town you're just a guest in" (OUFH ALSO FLORENCE ILY)

9. Guilty As Sin? - "What if he's written "Mine" on my upper thigh only in my mind?" (:3)

10. Who’s Afraid of Little Old Me? - 'So tell me everything is not about me, but what if it is?" (women 👏 unapologetically 👏 not 👏 humble)

11. I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can) - "Trust me, I can handle me a dangerous man. No really, I can" (so much writing potential)

12. loml - "You're the loss of my life" (WDYMMMMMMMM)

13. I Can Do It With A Broken Heart - "'Cause I'm miserable (Haha). And nobody even knows" (the overachiver mental health anthem)

14. The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived - "And I'll forget you, but I'll never forgive. The smallest man who ever lived" (see really said imma hold a grudge on the man with a small dick)

15. The Alchemy - "The hospital was a drag. Worst sleep that I ever had." (medical trauma besties u know this one)

16. Clara Bow - "You look like Taylor Swift. In this light, we're lovin' it. You've got edge, she never did" (T A Y L O R)

#pls send help #this is like a poetry anthology i need to write ESSAYS #ts #echo rants #taylor swift

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pacifymebby · 1 year

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omll i was wondering if u could write about the peaky boys w a makima!reader from chainsaw man, absolutely batshit crazy 💗

Yo okay so i had to check that i knew who this was because i havent watched chainsaw man however, i think i get it. Feel free to tell me if i do not in fact get it haha ❤️

Tommy

🌿 You seem sweet at first, non confrontational, almost mousy? You're always smiling and he only really knows who you are because you're always being mentioned by the mothers on watery lane, the local old men and women, because you're so helpful, always helping people

🌿But Tommy isn't so optimistic as to believe that a person could be so kind without wanting something in return

🌿 he’s not surprised to see your dark side, but he is surprised to see how completely ruthless you are... at first he thinks you’re just passionate about your cause... then he starts to realise its more than that

🌿 you’re heartless, completely murderous... anyone who stands in your way ends up dead and, to make it worse, you fear nothing. Not even Tommy Shelby

🌿 when he realises that all this time you’ve been using him to get to where you want to go, he wants to play the long game, to get revenge... but he isn’t so sure he’s got time to play the long game anymore

🌿 him going 0 to 100 with you, angry, threatening, hand on his gun only to be met with you going 100 - 100000000 on him, a whole new level of insane.

🌿 Tommy has that thing he tells people, that he’s already died once, that he’s already dead... that thats why he doesn’t fear anything or anyone, but you genuinely terrify him precisely because you’re the opposite of that

🌿you know you’re alive and you’re foaming at the mouth with that insane survival instinct, when it comes to kill or be killed you basically invented the term.

🌿 You’d go from lovers to enemies, but painfully, he’d still be in love with the idea of who you once were, who he thought you were, he’d be desperate to believe that he could see you that way again some day, that you’ll go back to being that sweet, seemingly innocent girl...

🌿 but you won’t and the pinnacle of your relationship would be the two of you struggling, guns raised to one another’s head, either you’re going to end up killing each other or fucking each other.

Alfie

🐻 Alfie already has one unhinged-stop at nothing-bloody minded friend, and fuck does he need another

🐻 Like a hole in the head does he need another..

🐻 When he first meets you he senses something off but he can’t quite work it out... the reason for that is that you are too much like him, too much like Tommy, and yet you don’t behave that way at all

🐻 You behave like a good, kind, down to earth, ordinary girl. You behave like a girl who shouldn't be wandering around Camden Town on your own. Which is why he offers his help to you.. why he takes you under his wing.

🐻 Of course, you’d come to Camden Town with the sole purpose of attracting his attention, knowing that the feared old man was known to be a little soft when it came to young women.. a charitable man

🐻 So you’d planned that he would take you in, take you under his wing, help you along in life... thats why you’d gone to Camden, why you’d wandered around on your own, helpless and doe eyed... you’d been hoping to manipulate your way into gaining Alfies trust

🐻 And you succeed, once you’re in you get close to him, you keep up the innocent act, when he talks about bread you make sure he believes that you really think he’s talking about a loaf of bread... you have him take pity on your softness, completely endear him to you

🐻 You probably get into a position where you can play him and Tommy off against one another to destroy them both and take everything they have

🐻 When Alfie finally realises it’s because you lose your temper. You’d asked him for something he couldn’t give you, asked him to do something that wasn’t just “unreasonable but fucking insane sweetheart, thats what that is...”

🐻 Alfie comes in one morning, into his office, switches the lamp on and you’re sitting there in his chair with your fingers wrapped around his gun. You tell him to sit down and this time it’s you thats offering the deal or death...

🐻 He doesn’t know how to respond at first, he can tell by the look in your eyes you’re not the girl he thought you were, that something has snapped in your head. He’s sad! He’s losing a friend, bad blood all over again...but he knows he has to be smart to get out of this one.

🐻 It’ll end up a triangle, you trying to play Alfie and Tommy off against eachother, each of them trying to play you off against the other. Unless Alfie and Tommy work together then they’ve already lost to you...

Arthur

🍂 Poor Arthur would be completely taken in by you, he’d fall in love with you so fast, he’d think you were so good for him

🍂 and maybe you would be... at first. You’d help him with his sickness, with his ptsd, you’d provide him with the support he needed to begin to face his demons and get better

🍂 you’d help him get sober and the Shelby family would be torn. Ada and the younger siblings would probably think you were doing a good thing, that you were a good woman, but Polly would be suspicious and Tommy again, would be asking what you wanted in return.

🍂 he’d even try to trick you, offering you large sums of money to abandon his brother in the dead of night... but you wouldn’t fall for it. You’d be so much smarter than he was accounting for.

🍂 And then one day when the time was right, you’d snap, you’d flick the switch in your brain and rip everything Arthur had worked on, everything he’d managed to take back from himself... you’d rip it away from him....

🍂 and you’d do it for your own selfish but stubborn reasons... you want him to be your own personal fighting dog... you want to break him completely.. if he snaps and relapses he’ll be out of control and so, so, so much worse than he ever was before,

🍂 thats what happens when you show someone the door, give them a light, give them hope and then tear it from them... when the wounds almost healed it hurts more to rip it open, it scars deeper

🍂 he’d be so broken that you’d have complete power over him and you would be able to use him to terrorise Tommy and take over the family..

🍂 the fights between the two of you when he begins to realise what you’ve done to him... the violence, the threats... and of course that deadly combination of love and hatred again

🍂 Because Arthur loves you with the whole of his soul... and now he’s realising that you never loved him at all... he’s wounded and confused but mostly he’s angry

🍂 and maybe you’ve underestimated the monster in him... I can see this ending one of two ways... him strangling you to death in a bitter, coked up rage, then being devastated by what he’s done... Tommy having to reassure him, bring him down, stop him from harming himself. Or you manipulating Arthur into nearly killing Tommy... it would be dark, Tommy having to kill you not knowing whether or not if he does, Arthur won’t kill him.

John

🌼 I think John would be less taken in by you than Arthur, but I do think he’d fall for your sweet, kind girl charms.

🌼 The reason he’d be less taken in would be because he knows how good girls react to the work he does, to the things that happen in his family... and you don’t react like you should at all

🌼 He knows something is off when Tommy comes into the office blood streaming from his chest, you don’t even pale. You smile and offer to help him get cleaned up. You don’t ask any questions

🌼 So John is suspicious, but he wants to see the good in you, so he sticks by you, makes little excuses in his head for why you are the way you are. He manages well, deciding that perhaps you’ve seen lots of blood before, you have brothers who fight maybe...

🌼 Of course you’re not bothered by the sight of blood because it’s usually you drawing it from other people. You’ve stabbed people, strangled people... you’re murderous, lethal and merciless... and the only reason you’re with John is because you have one goal...

🌼 To take everything his family can give you, then get rid of them and, any evidence they ever existed. You’re going to drain them like a parasite.

🌼 You probably fuck your way through the whole family... you’re not even careful... you kind of let John know that you’re fucking his brother Tommy.. there's nothing he can do about it, and it does enough to hurt him that you can control him

🌼 Its when you’re fucking them that you put ideas in their head. You convince Ada to leave Birmingham again, convince Polly that she misses the nomadic lifestyle, the travelling from place to place... You slowly isolate the men from any women in the family who might still see sense... and then you pit the men against each other...

🌼 I can imagine Tommy threatening to kill you, he has you up against the wall with a gun pushed to your throat, choking you with it. You have a gun digging into his stomach, both of you thinking you could fire at any second, Arthur practically foaming at the mouth screaming for Tommy to just fucking do it, and John, coming up behind Tommy, telling him no, “you fucking touch my wife and I’ll see that you die fucking slowly...” you thinking you are winning, that Tommy will put you down, that you will be able to play out your twisted little plan to its end

🌼 but the second Tommy lets you go John shoots you, he’s cold and heartless in the moment, starring into you with empty eyes as you try to beg and manipulate, but you’re so far gone crazy you can’t hide your contempt for him anymore.

🌼 “Know you don’t love me now don’t I, know you never fucking did!” John bitter and spitting as he gets up in your face.

🌼 You daring him to do it, trying to goad him into it, you even put your lips around the barrel of the gun, lick it and suck it trying to outdo him

🌼 But he does do it, he does kill you. I think he’d be so hurt by the way he’d poured his heart and soul into loving you, that it would be the love for you, the you that once was which made him kill you.

Bonnie

🍀 Bonnie is a bright enough lad, but he wears his heart on his sleeve so he’s easy to read, easy to know, easy to manipulate.

🍀 You wouldn’t struggle to tug on his heart strings, you’d be shy with him at first, pretend to be innocent, you'd pretend you were a blushing virginal young girl who’s no evil in her heart at all

🍀 And Bonnie would believe you because he always wants to believe the best in people, always so optimistic.

🍀 Aberama won’t trust you entirely, he’ll be suspicious but not enough to stop you getting close to his son, and he’ll be pacified by the way you do make his son so happy.

🍀 You’re Bonnies number one fan, you cheer for him at every fight, you visit him in the changing rooms before and after... and you place bets on him all the time.

🍀 But you’re only doing this to get close to the Peaky Blinders... Bonnie says he’ll be the most successful boxer in the world one day and he tells you Tommy Shelby is the one who is going to make it happen... so what can Tommy do for you, you wonder?

🍀 Behind the scenes you start tying your strings, manipulating them, devising plans and slowly, slowly getting closer to the Shelby's.

🍀 By playing exactly the same innocent game, you manage to get yourself into Tommy’s bed too, and once you’re fucking the most powerful man in the city, the city may as well be yours.

🍀 You start using Tommy, having him kill your enemies one by one by lying about them, powerful men... you make things up, say they raped you, threatened you, tell him they hurt you... and one by one Tommy makes them disappear.

🍀 The tragedy here is that its Tommy giving the orders, more often than not Bonnie is the one carrying out the orders with his father... risking his life and his soul in the eyes of god, to kill your enemies, whilst you fuck around and humiliate him

🍀 You probably let him know in the most cruel way once you’re done with him... you’d let him walk in on your fucking Tommy in the changing rooms or something, right before a fight he’s supposed to be throwing for the peakys.

🍀 And Bonnie would be angry and humiliated and upset, so he’d throw the fight the wrong way... he’d lose instead of win or win too soon, in the first round, it would be reckless and Tommy would threaten him... you’d watch them fighting and be so amused and entertained.

🍀 Bonnie would be devastated but he wouldn’t be able to take revenge, he’d be heartbroken but, no matter how terribly you’d wronged him, no matter how much it hurt... he wouldn’t want to see harm come to you, wouldn’t be able to kill you. He’d end up chewed up and spat out... and the Shelby's would be threatening to forget him too if he didn’t just accept things the way they were and carry on the same as before,

🍀 He’d try to warn Tommy but Tommy wouldn’t listen, would be too wrapped up in your web of lies... and when it all comes falling down, when you turn on Tommy too.. will Bonnie still be there to help Tommy? I’m not so sure.

Isaiah

🐀 It wouldn’t take much to manipulate him, you’d only have to flirt with him, only have to respond to his charm with charm of your own. You could probably have him in your bed on the first night, addicted and coming back for more within a day...

🐀but Isaiah would be the first rung on your ladder to the top of the Shelby family and you wouldn’t be satisfied until you’d married Tommy and killed him off, taking over the business and family...

🐀 But for now, Isaiah... you’d control him with sex and it would be so easy.... his friends would joke that he’s whipped... they'd have NO IDEA

🐀 you’d use him for your own entertainment too, getting him into trouble, having him start fights purely to satisfy your own bloodlust

🐀 he’s see that you were insane before the others but he wouldn’t do anything about it, partially out of pride, partially out of not wanting to lose you, but mostly because he’s attracted to your unhinged side... he thinks its hot that he’s never sure when you’re going to flip the switch and kill a man

🐀you don’t scare him but its because he’s naive, he doesn’t realise the extent of your madness, doesn’t understand that you’re using him... he just thinks you’re a little wild

🐀he’s always having to talk you down from killing men who piss you off at bars. he’s dragged you away from a bleeding, broken man you’d launched yourself at because “he's in a bar but he ain’t fuckin drinking.. what kind of man...”

🐀and you’ve caused trouble between him and Finn and Michael before... you can’t help yourself, you like to play them off against one another just to see what will happen...

🐀its only when one night you pull your gun on Finn, that Isaiah realises there's a problem, that you're mental... the fact you’d pull a gun on one of your closest friends... and over something as trivial as saying he doesn’t think you’ll convince Tommy to let you do a job for him with the lads.

🐀 its then, when he’s trying to talk you down, that he realises you really are cold, heartless, that you don’t care for anyone but yourself... not even him... when he asks you to put the gun down and you don’t even hear him

🐀he has to pull a gun on you himself... when you relent and smile this wide and sweet smile, you laugh and pass the whole thing off as a joke, but he knows deep down that it wasn’t a joke, you weren’t just messing around...

🐀from then on he’s terrified of you, he doesn’t know how to warn the rest of the family... they’ll think he’s being stupid, scared of a girl...

Michael

☘️he probably thinks he’s using you... you’re this Machiavellian power couple but you’re both using each other, manipulating one another...

☘️for awhile it would work... the two of you managing to fix things within the family, climbing higher as a couple, taking power slowly...

☘️but you’re only using Michael and he thinks he’s using you... so the closer you get to the top the deeper the betrayals of one another cut... you would happily serve Michael’s head on a silver plate to Tommy Shelby in exchange for a little more of the company...

☘️You also want revenge... Tommy has never taken you seriously, what with you being Michaels wife, you’re hardly an important member of the family and you’re married to a traitor...

☘️but you’re determined to prove Tommy wrong about that, you’re worth so much more than he thinks and you’re going to show him that underestimating you is a mistake...

☘️it’s you that lets Tommy know Michael is a traitor, you leave him enough clues that he thinks he’s working it out for himself... and of course, you cover your own tracks too, setting Michael up for your crimes as well as his, and letting other peaky boys take the fall for you too

☘️its a combination of brains, sexual charm and the occasional sudden snap of violence that people begin to fear you

☘️the house staff work it out first, they talk, they know you’re not so pretty and sweet, that you’re villainous...

☘️you let Michael take the fall, he gets killed and suddenly you’re a widow, but Tommy looks upon you kindly for the way you lead him to Michael, he begins to trust you, give you more power... when you begin to slowly try and poison Tommy, against the rest of his family and also literally try to poison him - slowly, adding an untraceable amount of arsenic to his tea everyday - its Frances who realises the evil in you

☘️ you get so close to power but Frances kills you, she uses Tommys shut gun to kill you because you’ve worked out that she knows about you... you try to kill her but she gets to you first, shoots you in the back when you’re adding the arsenic to a vacant Tommy’s tea. And thats that, maybe you can outsmart the gangsters, but you can’t manipulate or outsmart Frances, soz.

#Peaky blinders imagines #dark! reader #Tommy Shelby x dark! reader #Tommy Shelby x reader #Arthur shelby x reader #John Shelby x reader #Bonnie Gold x Reader #Bonnie gold imagine #peaky blinders headcanon

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alicentsultana · 15 days

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Where do I even begin ?

Oh let’s start with the fact that your writing style was INSANE .I really love the way you describe things .Dark Alicent my beloved you were done justice in this .

And Alicent having Aegon to attend lessons ma then granting him so wine was such a goof bit and I do think that was in character for both of them .

Alicent played the dutiful way after Viserys died (“Let him rest!”) was such a delicious detail .I really felt for Aegon when he takes the throne and it’s such a nightmare but if he stays delusional his family (and any possibility of recognition)is dead .I SEE what you were doing with Helaena’s warnings and I love it .

The politics in this were all so delicious .Weird word for talking about politics but reading about the Black box and Corlys as hand and Lord Arryn and Rhaenyra’s pregnancy was so engaging .

Alicent losing three kids was a change that struck me ,and I find it interesting because a lot of women lost children in medieval times and now we don’t even know if they actually lost them or even had them so it was interesting in the historical sense .And really sad because the scene where she is caressing her empty belly really did something to me .I stared at the phone for like ten minutes .

Alicole in this was INSANE ,like wdym she literally said she wanted to have his babies ? What do you mean she’s PLANNING to make him hers ? Not that it makes me unhappy actually I was kicking my feet the entire time .

Alicent’s dream was such a haunting and good bit .Aemond being his cunty self my beloved .And you mentioning Daeron with Criston …the way you wiew Daeron is so heartwarming he is such a KID .

And ofc her last words to Viserys were so cunty and so hunting .The way she took his life and the only possibility to ease his guilt after what he did to Aemma was probably the best bit of the entire chapter .”See you in Hell” GODD

I’m so ready for the second chapter and I really thank you for this fic already because it made my day better .

YOU GO ALICENTSULTANA

Omg, thank you so much!

Lessons in exchange for wine is something that totally would happen, this is soft manipulation/motivation.

Alicent must be a cancer, I can feel it, it's in my blood. I have wondered for a long time what is a major manipulation feature one can express, and I totally would play dumb and heartbroken just to see the outcome and cover my actions, I gave her this to make her truly unhinged.

Aegon is doing it for his children and his siblings, this is the sole reason, wine also. I think he used Helaena's vision to justify his actions and feel less guilty about it, but don't worry, there will be no remorse coming.

I'm not a politics girl, like I don't understand anything about it, so in my head I always justify everything as "political undisclosed reasons", but then, Alicent is a politician, her father and life taught her the hard way, so she had, as queen mediator, to act. Including taking risks with helping Corlys raise to position - one snake + one snake = naja and coral. She must be suttle, must analyze everything, every step, no faux pas.

Corlys is playing for the winning team when is convenient, though don't ask me what he will tell his wife.

I also pondered who would be a major Lord who could prove himself against Rhaenyra, and who better than the brother of her mother. Throughout s1 she stroked me as being relapse and naive about the power of court women, while Alicent entertained them, Rhaenyra was mostly doing faces and throwing some tantrums. Who's to say she wouldn't offend, unknowingly, a member of her own extended family? The Arryns are a super important house, and are her relatives, losing them is losing the vale.

Let's not mention Viserys health deteriorating and her doing what? Thousands years of honeymoon? Alicent was pregnant and holding a child while the world was falling apart and pretty girl was doing what? This will be brought up again in the future. Viserys would 100% overlook and think nothing of it (as always).

I have an hc that she had at least three more pregnancies, though she would have lost them by natural causes, I decided to make her get rid of them herself, and lamenting it because obviously she wouldn't want to do it, but she couldn't bring herself to birth more children to an ungrateful crown. I believe after Aemond, she would often tell Criston like "oh, i wish they were yours" both because she lost faith in Viserys, but also because Criston was the dadTM and she's in love with him.

They are very much aware of their feelings, but my intention was to do it much more mature and heavy, more wild and on edge, they are certainly more touchy, more open, not that many notice or see it happening beyond some of her servants and Westerling (he have a keen eye).

But again, they would never be caught red handed (god I really want to post the second chapter, people will scream).

Even if he's already hers, Alicent doesn't content herself with halves, she wants the whole meal, the whole experience.

Daeron will always be a baby, he's not allowed to grow up, he stays in mini size, pocket size. Though she would want it, Alicent won't get pregnant again, she doesn't have the energy to do so, and she is Dowager Queen, she has an image to keep.

She hates Viserys, like, actively, fervently. Alicent wanted to say those words when he was alive but she couldn't risk him not dying.

I'm so glad this made your day better, this is always the major intent! Chapter 2 will come soon, I'll try to post it as soon as possible.

Thank you so much for reading and telling me what you thought of it!

#ask #insights #author's idea #pro team green

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scienceoftheidiot · 3 months

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I've grown way too unhinged with these "asks", but I've been meaning to send you this one for a while, so please indulge me!

From what I've noticed, a lot of the Royai fan artists I follow tend to prefer drawing Riza, when they're not portraying her with Roy. But I've noticed that a number of your pieces focused on Roy only, which I find very interesting! Would you say that his character inspires you more than Riza, artistically/creatively speaking? If so, in what ways?

Please tell us more! And thank you, as always <3

Lol not unhinged at all I love to receive asks, I just always forget to reply 🥲🥲 sorry 🥲 so, first, thank you very much for asking ! 🥰❤️

And lol yeah, sometimes I feel like I stick out like a sore thumb among the Royai people. But eh, healthy ecosystems need biodiversity 🤣

I hope my answer isn't too long.

I do have a preference for Roy in drawing, for a number of reasons.

I precise in drawing, because I do love writing Riza, not more than I do writing Roy, but they're relatively even for me - even if, yes, I tend to favour Roy because he's easier for me, there, too.

I like to draw him, because I like his face, expressions and postures, and I like to explore them. He's a fun little guy to draw, when I think Riza is cool AF (and I have a lot to say about her character, too!) but she's not as fun to draw for me (once again I love her and she's in fact the female character I have drawn the most I think, because I have a hard time drawing women, but still, if I'm looking for a quick doodle, I'll go towards Roy).

But yes, they're more or less indissociable for me, and for proof my first fan art for FMA was indeed Royai (here!).

Anyway. While Royai is my favourite ship and I love Riza to bits, my favourite character in FMA is Roy. Roy first. (And my husband has understood that well, he's calling me when we do a rewatch and Roy appears on screen and I'm not watching. Like HURRY ROY IS THERE).

Now, if anyone who knows me from earlier than my FMA obsession reads this, and I describe the utter mess that is Roy, they'll understand that it couldn't have gone any other way. Here's a man in a position of power, who hides everything behind a façade, who's a nerd and highly intelligent (I admit I'm often irked by some posts in the royai fandom. This guy is smart. He's goofy, he's a dork, but he's smart. Book smart, he's a fine tactician, and he can command. Erasing that is erasing part of his identity, and I'm sure part of why Riza loves him, too), has a weird sense of humour even though he can also be intense af, is crushed by unbelievable guilt from his past actions (I admit Roy and Roza both beat all of my previous fixations in that, good job being war criminals, guys 🙃) and intends to repair what he's done as much as he can, one way or another, whose sole goal is to make things better for others/his place/his country, whatever he has to give up for it to work, who inspires others doing that, and who gets badly injured/disabled during the story and keeps going and fighting teeth and nails through it and beyond?

WELL. There is no question I will fall for this dude instantly. This is like. Checking all the boxes for me to be instantly in love with this guy. Like. I think he's actually the only one who checks ALL of my boxes.

I do think however that Roy isn't complete without Riza, and that it's the same on her side (like. I've only tagged my current fic with "codependency" but that's how I write them whatever I write). I'm just fixating on him first, but I still find Riza an awesome character, there's no debate there 😊

Here you go! I've written a novel again lol but I hope I've replied to all your questions. I can talk more about how I see Roy and Riza, I always have more to tell, but really that would just make this even more unpalatable 😅 thank you again for asking 😊

#ask #replies #aicasey

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