#(He seemed very humbled to take us back through his song catalogue. It was a really great intimate show.) | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

sophiamcdougall · 4 years

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EXPLAINING SANREMO

(PART TWO) I am back. I have barely eaten or slept and Tumblr has tried to murder me and this post multiple times, but I have survived. Thank you for your patience.

Part One of my attempt to explain the seismic experience that is 2020 Sanremo Festival of Italian Song is here.

Ready? I assure you, you are not, but let’s proceed. So Sanremo rages pitilessly on. Now everyone knows what’s at stake, and everyone, including your humble recapper, is exhausted, but doing the gay/chaotic best they can.

As the final battle to save Amadeus, Rancore, Italy and THE WORLD approaches, Achille Lauro has a last message for the troops. And I’m not deducing this, he literally said it on Twitter.

...Hold me I’m scared.

Meanwhile (sort of) (go with it) (time isn’t real at Sanremo) a minor drama has occurred offstage. Singer Tiziano Ferro made an ill-advised joke about Fiorello’s interminable comedy bits, some idiots on Twitter ran away with it, and poor Fiorello was upset! This is minuscule in Sanremo terms. But consider the flapping of a butterfly’s wings. Consider hurricanes. But who is Tiziano Ferro?

Hold on. We’ll get to it. For now ...

Fiorello is dancing seductively for an absolutely delighted Amadeus while dressed as a rabbit. And wearing a blonde wig. Is there a rational explanation for this? I mean, sort of. But also no.

And then he worries Amadeus might give him herpes, which causes Amadeus to freaking snap.

“No, no!” yells the mercurial Fiorello. Amadeus isn’t worthy of his kisses yet. He ricochets out of Amadeus’s arms and into the audience and “passes on” the kiss to a guy in the front row.

“Incredible things are going to happen tonight!” yells Amadeus, who has no fucking idea. ”Beautiful things,” corrects Fiorello.

But just because Fiorello is a mayhem elemental on a mission of love doesn’t mean he hasn’t got feelings.

Enter Italy’s sweetheart, Tiziano Ferro.

Actually, Tiziano’s been there all along. He’s the specialest of special guests, singing through basically his entire back catalogue every night. Which why it really was unfair of him to pick on Fiorello -- it’s not his fault he’s literally got to stand there and babble nonsense for aeons on end, Tiziano! He’s just serving the hungry chthonic entity that is Sanremo, same as you.

While the gay mayhem (the gayhem, if you will) surges around him, Tiziano has been fighting the good gay fight in his own steadfast way, so far untouched. His mere presence is a message of hope in itself, he knows this, and is determined to make it count. Ten years ago he was closeted, convinced coming out would end his career, and suicidal. Now happily married and gloriously successful, he is here to demonstrate that “it gets better”. He radiates such wholesome joy and resilience that everyone loves him.

So anyway, Tiziano didn’t mean to hurt anybody because he would never, and now he wants to make things right. So will Fiorello forgive him?

Ah, what better gesture of reconciliation than to goofily sing a love song written by Fiorello himself. Of course Fiorello forgives Tiziano, because Fiorello loves everyone, good and bad, (after all he loves Amadeus the most). But he is also a chaos being, and he is working harder than anyone else to channel the divine madness of this deranged Sanremo Festival into anyone who gets close. Tiziano, watch out!

Seems TIziano naively thought he could lean in for a staged, nearly kiss, but Fiorello’s very soul is antithetical to “nearly” anything.

“My husband’s going to divorce me!” wails poor Tiziano, but Fiorello has never felt so alive. This is Sanremo, bitches. Rules like “sixty-year-old men can’t be danger twinks, Fiorello,” have ceased to apply. He is an apostle of Achille Lauro, he has accepted the sermon of Benigni into his heart: it is time for PHYSICAL LOVE. While not quite ready (yet) to fuck everyone in the orchestra pit, he is throbbing with readiness, to frolic all over the theatre giving all the guys he can get his hands on THE KISSES OF HIS MOUTH.

Naturally this sparks further firestorms of chaos. “Do it again!” begs grizzled rocker and high-ranking competitor Piero Pelù. Electrified by the touch of Fiorello’s lips, he is later to be found running shirtless through the auditorium where he steals a handbag.

Everyone is kissing everyone, age and orientation be damned. Summoned by the gay sorcery unfolding, 65-year-old queer rock goddess Gianna Nanini manifests and is kissed worshipfully on the lips by 36-year-old duet partner Coez.

There’s also some kind of song competition going on I guess.

This happens:

That’s Ghali, GUYS, IT’S NOT WORKING, rappers ARE DROPPING LIKE FLIES ALL OVER THIS STAGE, WE’VE GOT TO DO SOMETHING.

(... it isn’t really Ghali and don’t worry. This is a gag? Which I still don’t really get? And nor does sweet anarchist cherub Fiorello whom we will later discover is currently being physically restrained from rushing onstage to tend to the fallen rapper’s wounds.)

The real Ghali raps in Arabic which among other things is a big old “me ne frego” of his own to Italian Trump-tribute act and failed wannabe prime minister Matteo Salvini. Then he gets close to Fiorello, which can only end one way.

All the boys are crazy for Fiorello’s kisses but Amadeus still can’t have any

It’s already a difficult night for Amadeus. TV presenter Antonella Clerici enters and far from standing a step beside him, righteously rips the piss out of him, which to be fair he accepts with grace.

And as for Achille Lauro ... ...No. Patience. The time to bear witness to the last stand of Achille Lauro is not yet come. There are other forces stirring at Sanremo.

Chaos has its dark side.

The gun on stage is cocked and loaded. This is it. ENTER MORGAN.

... and enter Bugo, who trails in behind Morgan, looking dazed and haunted. But whatever, it’s a million o’clock in the morning, aren’t we all.

They start to play. Italian Tumblr dozes fitfully on its sofa, idly crackshipping Amadeus and Fiorello. Utterly unprepared.

So most of us don’t notice what’s happening ...

... until the music just stops.

No one’s paid attention to the Morgan and Bugo in days. As far as I’m concerned Fabrizio Moro has already been avenged and my bloodlust is slaked. The song - apparently written wholly by Bugo - honestly, isn’t bad, but Morgan’s been tuneless throughout and their duet/cover last night was cringeable. There have been some major reversals in the rankings but at this point there’s almost no way they’re going to be one of them. And Morgan is not happy.

So Morgan changed the lyrics (and this isn’t even last-minute improv, he fucking printed it) to attack the one person who still had faith in him, blaming Bugo and Bugo alone for their poor performance so far. On live TV. In front of millions. After screaming at Bugo backstage just minutes ago. And he expects Bugo to just stand there and take it.

"Me ne frego to that shit,” thinks Bugo, and becomes the unexpected self-care hero of Sanremo as he vanishes into the night.

And that’s how I learned the Italian word for pandemonium.

Morgan has the absolute nerve to ask what’s going on. Amadeus breaks out in visible cold sweat. Fiorello is thrown bodily onstage to DO SOMETHING, ANYTHING, OH MY GOD.

It’s long past midnight and a bunch of worried middle-aged men in sparkly jackets are scampering around yelping “Bugo? Bugo! BUGO? BUGO!!!” and that, I am here to tell you, when you are already delirious from exhaustion and shitposting-induced hysteria, is more than enough to tip you right over the edge.

Italian Tumblr resigns itself to never sleeping again.The memes aren’t going to make themselves.

youtube

Translation: ”Is Bugo there?” “What’s happening?” “Where’s Bugo gone?” “I have to go and see where Bugo is.” “Bugo left.” “BUGO!”

Morgan wants vengeance. Fiorello, adorably indifferent to the fact that he was shoved on stage to, you know, entertain the audience, wants to find the missing waif, wrap him in a blanket and feed him soup. So they both rush offstage and Amadeus is left alone in a living anxiety dream.

The audience are booing. The 70th fucking Sanremo Festival of Italian Song is falling to pieces on his watch. For all he knows murder is going on backstage and he picked known powder-keg and scoundrel Morgan for the Festival. The buck stops with him. And he has no lines, no back-up, no idea what to do about it.

And then Fiorello, angel of misrule, avatar of lawlessness and love, strolls back onstage. He looks confident and relaxed, like a man with all the answers. Which he is.

“Have you got Bugo?” Amadeus inquires desperately.

NO RULES, NO MASTERS, NO SPONSORSHIP MONEY. ME NE FREGO.

Everything is broken. And somehow everything is OK.

Everyone, Amadeus included, bursts into hysterical, cathartic laughter.

“Is this my fault?” Amadeus asks. “YES!” crows Fiorello, lovingly forcing Amadeus to face his sins and his nightmares in a healing atmosphere of radical acceptance and mass psychosis.

And that’s how Amadeus learned that the real Sanremo was inside us all along. And what he needs in this glorious maelstrom was never a beautiful woman standing a step behind him. It’s a chaos pixie dream boy at his side.

It’s time to cast out toxic masculinity and become a better man.

So Amadeus wraps up the show as best he can and then out of pure human compassion, he and Fiorello personally wander the streets of Sanremo looking for Bugo until four in the morning.

Bugo and Morgan are automatically disqualified

And now let us witness the final passion of Achille Lauro. Who is this Achlle Lauro kid anyway? How intentional is all this? Is he the Messiah, or a very naughty boy?

SO YEAH. Anyway, everyone’s wondering what the fuck Achille and his producer/guitarist Boss Doms (yes, really) are going to do, and BE, next. Achille’s first three looks were inspired by St Francis of Assisi, David Bowie, and Marchesa Luisa Casati.

So ... Freddie Mercury, maybe? Elizabeth I? Jesus Christ? And after the flurry of kissing Fiorello whipped up ..

Will they ... can they ... dare they...

Do you even need to ask?

I have no idea how the crazy bastards who guessed “Elizabeth I” did it.

Achille thrusts his hips against Boss’s backside. Drops to his knees before him and lets the shape of the microphone speak for itself. Briefly chokes him. And throughout they are tender, elegant, and utterly, regally dignified.

And then, at last.

A joyous chorus of maenad-like shrieks rings out across Europe. If you’re in the Greater London area and your ears are still sore, I’m sorry. That was me.

That’s it. Achille Lauro and Boss Doms ascend into heaven and pass into history.

Not even they can give more to Sanremo.

The dust settles.

The dawn breaks.

WE FUCKING DID IT! RANCORE LIVES! WOUNDED (as are we all) BUT SMILING AT A WORLD TRANSFORMED! (Not only that but, after starting at the bottom of the leaderboard he’s been catapulted up into the top ten and wins the special prize for Best Lyrics!)

And Amadeus?

Well, let’s hear from him in his own words.

Because Fiorello asked him to, Amadeus is wearing a blonde wig to look like legendary TV host Maria de Filippi. Amadeus doesn’t normally sing, but because Fiorello asks him to, he joins him in song.“A WORLD OF LOVE! LOVE! LOVE!” they chorus. It’s the hymn of the new day.

“He can make me do anything!” Amadeus sighs to the audience. So Fiorello asks him to slow-dance. And they do.

The prophecy has been fulfilled. Amadeus has let love into his heart. He has surrendered to the holy power of gay chaos. He is a man reborn.

He didn’t find Bugo on that long, gruelling dark night of the soul, because incredibly, poor Bugo never left the theatre and spent the night literally hiding in a cupboard.

But he found something else.

As Sanremo finally, mercifully approaches its end, Fiorello grapples him close and, all teasing cast aside, whispers fiercely in his ear:

And somehow it was.

And toxic masculinity?

To find out why don’t we - and I am sorry about this - check in on Matteo Salvini who would normally be rage-tweeting up a Trump-style storm by now. He loves bitching about Sanremo for being “rigged by the left” or occasionally letting a non-lily-white performer win, and this year he even tried to organise a boycott. Let’s see how that’s going.

This, the gayest-ever Sanremo in history, is the most-watched Sanremo in 18 years, with an incredible 60% audience share.

“Me Ne Frego” flies to the top of the Spotify charts. (And though the judges are still cowards and traitors who left Achille in 8th place, there is no doubt across the media who the real star of the festival was. ) And Salvini’s “boycott” just meant he effectively banned himself from making a peep about it.

So who won the festival?

ALL OF US.

Oh, you meant literally.

This guy. His name is Diodato and his song is called “Fai Rumore” (Make a Sound.) It’s fine.

And that was Sanremo. It wasn’t a dream, it was a place. And you, and you, and you were there.

#Explaining Sanremo #Explaining Sanremo Part 2 #Sanremo #Sanremo 2020 #Achille Lauro #Amadeus #Fiorello #Amadello #sanremo 70

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yoosungshoodie · 6 years

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bright stars.

CHARACTERS: ORIGINAL CHARACTERS. Juyeon Park, Daeshim Ryu. FANDOM: Mystic Messenger, but only mentions of canon characters like V and Rika. Not based on MM’s plot purely and diverges canon. WORD COUNT: 2.5k. AUTHOR’S NOTE: Keep in mind there’s slight abuse in this. Nothing too serious. A completely self indulgent project for an MM OC I have, intended to be V’s alternate MC but this is written in VABVerse’s universe, which is written by the lovely @fromthedeskofelizabeththird. Also including @kiserusmoke for her OC Daeshim Ryu. I’m aware I should write something about Juyeon before posting this, but I’ll save that for a later date.

Keep in mind this is a work based solely on my OC and other people’s OC’s in a verse that diverges canon.

Juyeon Park (Jenny) is a twenty-something year old soloist who drops off the map and becomes a member of Mint Eye after the death of a family member. She eventually becomes one of Rika’s "prized” expendable followers before being discarded and the cult is disbanded. This takes place before set events of VABVerse, and gives some insight to her character.

Juyeon Park did not understand the words spoken to her over her cell phone’s receiver. While her hearing was exceptional and she had a knack for creating songs, she had no longer been able to comprehend the string of words being spoken to her over the phone.

“We would need some money from you to cover funeral costs,” Her mother had told her conversationally, as if they were discussing borrowing money to buy a pair of shoes. Juyeon, from what she had seen from her mother’s social media, was a very big fan of Louboutins. “I know you were close to her, so I’m not too concerned about the cost of the funeral. I’m wondering if she had kept any extra money behind as well.”

While she had always known her mother was never much of anything besides pencil skirts and paperwork, there was an uncomfortable feeling that settled itself in her stomach when she heard of her grandmother being spoken about; almost as if she was a pet goldfish. It did not take long for Juyeon to know it wasn’t her lack of eating that had made her suddenly feel very ill.

“I understand, but I have a request to make of you.” Juyeon spoke slowly while she drummed her fingers over her armrest. “I don’t feel comfortable speaking to you directly. Handle the issue through my manager. Please know that your invitation to her funeral is pending.”

In truth, she knew for a very long time her grandmother was dying. She had taken time off to watch time serve judgement by ending a life that didn’t deserve to end, even though she could never say that out loud. As her grandmother’s health declined however, Juyeon’s fear drove her away from impending death. Knowing that she had died, as terrible as it was to admit, seemed to feel like a relief. It felt like a weight lifted from her chest, no longer in suspension and freed her tangled limbs to move forward. Perhaps it was possible that she wanted her away from the world that had been nothing but cruel. It was better for her grandmother, and better for Juyeon as well.

Cruelty, she had decided, was something that was natural in people. She had never met a kindness in her life, and despite the smiles that placed themselves on waiting faces for her gaze, there was always something shiny and inauthentic about the notion. Learning to swallow those feelings at a young age, it had not been long before Juyeon knew how to conjure up a smile of her own that read in the exact same way. Acquiring a perfectly even-sided grin which showcased perfect teeth and sparkling eyes to match, Juyeon had given herself away to the inauthenticity she swore to harbor so much hate for.

She had not considered anything different from people until she had received an inkling of something at a gallery event she was forced to attend.

“Juyeon. Fix your posture. These windows aren’t tinted.” A gauntly woman next to Juyeon spoke. Ms. Yoo was a ghostly looking woman who stood at five-foot-seven and had likely been in the same position Juyeon was, once. Despite that possibility, she had never managed to exercise much empathy towards Juyeon’s from her merciless scheduling and overnight shooting. As far as Juyeon’s thoughts about her went, she personally would have taken great pleasure in running her over with her own sickly and tacky white convertible.

If Juyeon was to be honest, though, she was watching her a great deal. It was understood that her manager was divorced at least once, judging by the wedding band she wore despite being Miss Yoo, and the equally frightening men that she lingered beside in photos stationed at her desk. She was also aware that her bitter divorce battle was something that managed to spill into her work while she was in her office, considering the thin walls of the agency. There was a time Juyeon considered leaking some of her more private matters into the media out of sheer boredom, but having a new manager was a risky move.

“You know,” Her manager had spoken again, this time her voice much lower. “I heard you went up three kilograms.”

“Thank you for worrying about me.”

“Thank me for what? That you’ve been sneaking food from the back of the building because you think they don’t have security cameras? I’m sure you already know.” “How do you know it’s me? It could be any of the other pig trainees at the industry.”

Juyeon hadn’t been looking at her when she spoke, and she could only respond with a mild yelp when she felt the side of her head shoved towards the passenger window, with a dull thump from the glass resonating between the car.

“Do you think you can slack off now because you’ve made it?” Her manager had kept her hand raised in case of retaliation, but Juyeon said nothing as she settled herself back into the passenger seat, fixing her fussed curls with a shaking hand.

“You think you work so hard, don’t you. Just because you can hit a couple of notes and you look pretty. It’s disgraceful, really.” She had gotten out of the car by then and Juyeon quietly followed suit, lips pursed into a moderate line.

The hall was nothing short of grandiose and photographers galore, possibly more than she’d seen at her usual events. The host was a man she had met briefly at another gallery showing; she could tell by his humble gray cardigan and his sideswept blue hair that he was otherworldly and alluring. It was not difficult to find that his girlfriend had been something of the same distinction, judging by her waist long waves of blonde hair and grass-green eyes.

When Juyeon had first seen them, she had thought someone ripped the two out of a perfectly curated designer catalogue book—if she didn’t know any better, she would’ve been surprised the moment they moved. She remembered being distantly envious of her kindness. Rika, if she remembered correctly, spoke in a high voice that sounded akin to wind chimes, and even though she was a virtual nobody next to Juyeon, she still found herself thankful that she now had Rika’s number saved as a contact. It was slightly humiliating to think about.

Like all events she had attended, they wasted no expense on the decor—it never mattered how things really looked if you decorated it enough—with flowers and bright white lights that seemed to fill the room. Ms. Yoo had gone off to wherever she usually went, chatting up other people while she was left to her own devices.

In her peripheral, she could tell people had been eyeing her, surveying her, and measuring her up as she walked by with a quiet grace that was beaten into her from her debut. The way men would gawk at her made her feel like a pet in a cage to be judged for her grooming, but the thought no longer bothered her as much as it used to.

She found herself stationed in front of a blown-up portrait with a long exposure shot of the stars, faint white dotting the print canvas with a skew of color variations rolling over the sky. While she examined the photo carefully, it became obvious that it was too large and held too much for her eyes to simply glance over, so her feet stilled directly in front of the photo. The gentle and cold hues of the blue and purple provoked enough thought to quiet the world around her as she goggled unabashedly. Faintly, she wished she could be as bright and unfeeling as they were.

She had felt a very particular set of eyes on her that stood out from the others for amidst her admiration, but by the time she turned around, she could only see a flash of burgundy and black that sunk back into the crowd.

Who wears a suit that shiny? Her eyebrows seemed permanently knit together as she considered the lack of comfort that involved putting on a suit of that caliber.

Navigating the sea of crowd that presented itself before her was a hassle in itself. People she could hardly remember asked her if she recognized them, to where she had nodded with an excitement she reserved for variety shows and live performances.

“Juyeon! How are you?” Jihong Jung’s presence was as alarming as a fireball, and Juyeon had to mentally prepare herself before he spoke any further. He was a strange man who stood at a nice six-foot-one and had a rather strange fondness of skinship, despite Juyeon only working on a song with him. While he was rather pretty, Juyeon was never fond of another person’s touch.

“Not so loud, you bastard.” A manicured finger pressed against her temple and her eyes shut in moderate annoyance.

“This venue isn’t exactly built for inside voices, you know.” He began, a hand running from her shoulder to the tip of her elbow rather slowly. He kept up this action for a while.

She scoffed. “You must live a tiresome life.”

“You know how it’s like for me, we all have an image to uphold.” Jihong’s voice lowered and he had stepped closer to her for privacy’s sake. If she was to be honest, she was glad he was at least no longer yelling in her face.

“Taking photos next to pound dogs isn’t an image that’s going to last. I mean, you could be spending much more of your time improving your craft.” She said slyly. How lazy could he get?

“True. But you’re one of the lucky ones.”

She wondered how dense he was to agree with her. Fixing her dress, she propped a brow upwards as she spoke. “I’m aware, but tell me how so anyways.”

“You can get annoyed and kick and scream all you want, and everyone would cover it up for you anyways. The nation’s princess and all. I can’t even remember the last time I’ve ever been able to be angry.”

He didn’t know how wrong he was, but she let him continue speaking regardless. A clouding look had overshadowed his features when he paused between a sentence, as if something had suddenly occurred to him. “Speaking of, there’s something you need to know…”

And in the midst of his own faux secrecy he had grabbed her by the hand and pulled her close, eyes set on her while she could only return an expression that read of bemusement. Juyeon would have loved to at least pretend to feign some sort of interest, but instead she had found herself watching a very familiar figure slam something down towards a waiter and barrel out of the hall. The idea that her attention was elsewhere made her rather uncomfortable, but she was quick to deduce it down to just being tired; she usually quite enjoyed hearing about other people’s scandals.

“Speaking of annoyed, I’ve had enough. I’m bored.” She said dryly, pushing his hand away from hers as she straightened her posture. The only thing she had looked forward to tonight was being able to sleep on the car ride to her next destination, and she thought she was near hallucinating when he found a firm grip on her elbow to pull her back.

“Wait, listen to me.” It wasn’t difficult to understand that something in his eyes were different as he said that to her. A small smile pricked the edge of her lips when she watched his grip on her elbow tighten.

So he does have a breaking point. Juyeon made no point to move as she knew that people didn’t like her making too much noise, nor would anyone help her in the room as her knowing smile turned into a vague scowl.

“Miss Park, how lovely to see you again!” It’s a voice she didn’t recognize, one that was calling towards her with so much familiarity it makes her gaze falter towards the person in question.

It was instinctive for her to scowl, but she paused when she had seen exactly who had been the one calling for her. The man in the burgundy suit, who worked with V. If her brief and sour meeting from him gave her anything, it was that his name was Daeshim and he had a flair for the dramatics; his suit made it glaringly obvious. She had sworn, from the bottom of her heart, that he despised her. He had seen right through her when they first met, and it was strange to think that there was someone who didn’t find her charming. However, he was V’s PR agent. The likelihood of him meeting countless people like her before wasn’t slim.

There was a moment that she needed to register that he was speaking again. “Please introduce me to your lovely acquaintance, is he your co-star?”

What does he think he’s doing? Juyeon had never had someone intervene in situations like this before, and she had never intervened in the many that had occurred in her presence. For the most part, people ignored things like this—people who worked in the industry only gravitated towards shiny and pretty things.

It was clear he wasn’t looking for an answer to her question, because he continued to speak anyways. “Why, you’re so stunning I’m sure my client would love to have you as his next model. Let’s go say hello.”

With only her mouth hung slightly ajar, she had watched Daeshim drag Jihong further away from the scene and melt into the crowd yet again. The exchange she consequently watched take place had nothing to do kindness and brimmed to the edge with venom. While she wasn’t aware of what they were saying, it had taken her almost halfway through their conversation to realize he had saved her from something she was far too accustomed to, one she had learned to shove down her throat and normalize.

When she knew that, she began to rationalize as quickly as she could to make sense of the situation. She juggled the possibilities of him wanting her to owe him later for a favor, or maybe he simply did it in hopes of other people watching to seem like a good samaritan; but the truth was, Daeshim had nothing to ask of her and they had not attracted the attention of a single soul throughout the exchange.

A sudden detachment came between herself and the party as he let Jihong go and turned back to her with nothing more or less than nod. She had expected him to come back to her and demand compensation for the brave act, or at the very least expect something. It was the first time she had witnessed the kindness she passionately rejected the existence of, and it had been enough to keep her deep in thought for the rest of the party. Somehow, she felt that he would be something significant—to her or the world, she wasn’t quite sure yet.

#juyeon park #i should tag all my writing works but sig h s #that's just a lot of suffering #anyways meet my daughter she's a little shit #be warned this is almost entirely about an oc so lmfao

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setepenre-set · 7 years

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Love and War (chapter 5)

Strange Magic

Bog/Marianne, T rating

This is a story about two kingdoms, side by side, but worlds apart. And at war.

When the Bog King finally wins his war against the Fairy Kingdom, he decides that a political marriage with the eldest daughter of the deposed Fairy King will help to promote peace.

Obviously, he’s never met Marianne.

AO3 | FFN

Marianne hadn’t realized, before, how much more pleasant Bog’s law against love made her life.

Now, everywhere she looks, she sees couples holding hands, staring dreamily into each other’s eyes, kissing—there is entirely! too much! kissing!

All she hears is love songs and poetry and syrupy sweet declarations of devotion.

It’s horrible.

Planning Dawn’s wedding is a special kind of torture, especially since Marianne feels terribly guilty about how much she hates it. She’s happy that Dawn’s happy, of course, and she’s glad that Dawn is marrying someone she loves, the one person, in Marianne’s estimation, who might come close to deserving her.

But.

There is only so much talk of which love songs will be the best to dance to, what flavors the little heart-shaped wedding cakes should be, what expressions of affection the bride and groom’s vows of eternal love should include—

There’s only so much of that sort of thing that Marianne can take without wanting to scream.

Dawn has designed her wedding gown herself, of course, as well as Marianne’s gown. Marianne is disconcerted to find that her primrose-petal wedding dress has started a new fad. Dawn’s wedding promises to be the event of the season, and all of the really fashionable ladies are planning to wear dresses made of flower petals to it. This means that none of their dresses can be made ahead of time, as the flowers will wilt.

Some of the more frugal ladies might settle for gowns made of fabric that has been shaped into petals and then sewn together, but anyone who can afford the fresh flower gowns definitely intends to have one. Another trick the overwhelmed seamstresses have come up with is making an under-gown of fabric, which the petals can then be sewn to, but, as Dawn informs Marianne, the truly modish regard this as gauche and not to be considered.

The allure of the fresh flower gowns is in how delicate and ephemeral they are. Apparently.

“…right,” says Marianne, who definitely just came up with the idea on a cruel whim to torment her husband-to-be.

The chosen flower for the wedding party is to be violets: blue petals for Dawn, and deep purple ones for Marianne.

The dresses won’t be made until the day of the wedding itself, but after the royal seamstress takes their measurements, fabric mock-up dresses are made, so that Dawn can approve the final designs. Dawn is a perfectionist where clothing is concerned, and she adjusts the design of all the gowns several times, necessitating alterations and more trial fittings.

It is during the third round of fittings that Marianne finds she cannot bear another instant and has to excuse herself for a moment. She slips into an empty room a few doors beyond the fitting room, leans against the window sill, closes her eyes, and breathes.

The sound of the door opening and then closing again as someone enters makes her eyes fly open, and she turns, her heart in her throat, somehow convinced that it will be Bog, that he’s finally decided to stop avoiding her, the way he has ever since that night in her bedroom and—

It’s not Bog.

It’s Roland.

“No need to look so sad, now, Marianne,” Roland says with a smile that she would have found charming, once. “Help is here.”

He’s wisely elected to stay a few paces away from her, this time, out of striking distance.

“Roland,” Marianne says, lip curling.

He gives her another smile, and Marianne feels—very cold, all of a sudden, and very far away, looking at him. She looks at him, and it’s almost as if she’s never truly seen him before.

I used to think I was in love with you, she thinks.

For the first time, the thought brings with it no bitter wave of self-disgust and self-recrimination. Instead, Marianne feels only a distant kind of amazement, and gratitude at her narrow escape.

“So what’s the plan, Buttercup?” Roland asks, his hand going to the hilt of his sword. He turns his head just slightly, making the sunlight from the window hit his hair at a more direct angle, making it glow gold.

If Bog were here, she could look over at him and meet his eyes, and she would have to hide a smile at the way he’d raise his eyebrow because she’d know without either of them saying anything that they’d both be thinking what a twit, and then later Marianne would do an impression of Roland and both of them would laugh and—

Marianne comes to herself with a start, terribly aware of everything, all of the sensory detail of this moment, the fabric of the trial dress against her skin and the warmth of the afternoon sun and the solid expanse of the floor beneath her feet.

And she knows, suddenly, that she will not do it. She will not conspire with Roland—with anyone—against Bog. She will take her plans for rebellion no further.

“The army is ready to strike anytime you say go,” Roland says, teeth gleaming.

Marianne draws herself up to her full height.

“Go. Away,” she says.

Roland blinks.

“Beg pardon?”

“Go away,” Marianne repeats. “I do not want to talk to you. I do not want to look at you. Go away.”

Roland’s handsome face twists.

“You need me!” he says. “You need my help!”

Marianne laughs.

“I don’t want your help. I want nothing from you—nothing except your absence.”

“I command the army!” Roland says, striding towards her, his face thunderous. “Maybe you’ve forgotten that little fact! They won’t move without me, so if you want your coup, Marianne, you’d better—”

Marianne punches him.

Her fist hits him squarely in the face; he stumbles back and falls to the ground with a clatter of armor on stone.

“I have no desire for a coup,” she says, looking down her nose at Roland. “And when you address your queen, you will use her proper title.”

Roland gapes at her, his hand on his bruised face. Sadly, there doesn’t seem to be any blood coming from between his fingers; Marianne had been hoping she might have broken his nose.

She bares her teeth in a threat of a smile.

“And the proper title for a queen,” she says, “is Your Majesty.”

Roland is still staring at her in speechless shock as she sweeps from the room.

Marianne strides down the hall to the fitting room again, takes a deep breath, fixes her smile so that it’s less like a snarl, and opens the door.

“There you are!” Dawn says, her wings fluttering with excited agitation. “Come over here, Marianne; I want to look at the bodice of your dress again.”

Smiling, Marianne does as her sister asks, her shaking hands hidden in the fabric of her skirt.

Roland paces the empty room, his sixth circuit since Marianne knocked him down and left. She’d struck him! His face is probably going to bruise! His face!

She’s clearly out of her mind; what did she mean, she has no desire for a coup?! She can’t possibly like being married to that—that—

The King is a goblin, for goodness sake; you aren’t supposed to want to marry goblins!

If only Marianne hadn’t discovered him with Bella on their wedding day. Then he would be the one married to Marianne, and he wouldn’t need her approval for the coup. He would be able to start the rebellion in his own name.

Everything was so much simpler when Marianne was in love with him.

Why can’t she just let the whole Bella incident go? All right, so Marianne’s pride must have been injured, but surely he’d humbled himself enough to appease her, at the Spring Ball, a few months after she left him at the altar! He’d serenaded her publicly, begging for her return; shouldn’t they be even, now?

If only the Sugarplum Fairy had been released back then; he could have used one of those love potions she’s always talking about instead of going to all of that trouble with the singing and the choreographed dancing and the—

Roland stops his circuit of the room.

A love potion.

The Sugarplum Fairy is back in the fairy court. There’s no reason he can’t use a love potion now, is there?

Oh, it’s illegal, of course; the King has lifted the ban on love but not the law against love potions.

But that’s just a technical detail. The Sugarplum Fairy babbles on and on about her love potions to anyone who is willing to listen (and also to people who are not willing to listen). It won’t take more than a little nudge to get her to go back to making her potions.

And when Marianne is in love with him again, she’ll be eager to get rid of that goblin husband of hers. Roland will have his coup.

He’ll have his crown.

Roland pictures it; visualizes it: the crown, sitting on his head. Him, sitting on a throne. No more bowing and scraping and gritting his teeth and pretending not to see the way people look down their noses at him, pretending not to hear them whispering about the shame of his family history.

Nobody talks about a king like that. Nobody looks at a king like that.

He lets out a long breath, feeling calmer, his head held high, as though he already wears the crown.

Now, what’s the best way to go about this? He can’t ask the Lady Plum for the potion himself, otherwise she’ll be suspicious when Marianne suddenly comes back to him. Who can he convince to get the potion for him?

He runs through his mental catalogue of his current sweethearts, trying to decide which one is the most gullible.

Celeste, he decides. Definitely Celeste.

He twists his finger in his hair, making sure it’s lying just right across his forehead, and then strides out of the room and down the corridor towards the rooms of the palace chambermaids, in search of Celeste, planning what he’ll say to convince her.

I’ve heard that love potion can be a powerful aphrodisiac for two people already in love; wouldn’t you like to try it, darlin’?

Yes, that’s perfect. Obviously Lady Plum will know better; if Celeste mentions the supposed aphrodisiac qualities of the potion, Lady Plum will set the girl straight and he can’t have that. A simple matter, to make Celeste too embarrassed to ask a lady about aphrodisiacs. Roland will craft a sad story for her to tell to Lady Plum instead—unrequited love, desperation, sorrow, the works. The Sugarplum Fairy won’t be able to resist.

And when Celeste brings him the potion, he’ll switch it out for a bottle of powdered rose and violet petals, maybe some crushed mica thrown in for sparkle. She won’t be any the wiser when the two of them dust themselves with that, instead of the potion. Her own silly head will probably convince her that she feels the effect of the potion regardless.

Besides, Roland has excellent technique; doesn’t need an aphrodisiac to make a lover’s head spin. Roland has made a study of pleasing other people, both in and out of bed.

He’s always thought Marianne might not have been so quick to break their engagement, had he ever bedded her.

Roland’s heart and feet are light as he makes his way to the servants’ quarters, and he whistles a tune beneath his breath as he walks, that song Marianne was so fond of, when they were courting.

Take my hand; take my whole life, too—

I can’t help falling in love with you.

...to be continued.

Thank you for the reblogs and the comments! They always make me so happy. I hope you enjoyed the chapter!

#strange magic #butterfly bog #bog/marianne #love and war #arranged marriage au

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mattyslittleworld · 6 years

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1 up top ahk

Over the last week or two I’ve had to time to reflect of things that have been lingering in a negative way. But since I’ve been running fast, I’ve been pushing it aside and smothering it. I think all of this music I’ve been making, all of these collaborations, photoshoots, video shoots, traveling and just over all activation is me out running and avoiding Bepa passing away. I don’t think my mind could really handle that...ever. Everyone goes through this and everyone is stronger than me. I’m a coward. I walked away from that and never looked back and avoided it entirely. But very recently passing through the kitchen I’ll look at the family pictures instead of subconsciously turning my head. I feel it slowly coming back to me in reality like a dream becoming real. That friendship seems like a dream, like when I think of it and that dude as soon as it seems to become tangible it disappears. I get lost in those moments a few times a day. Something in my mind broke that day but in a beautiful way. I became a man. I’ve dealt with enough loss in my life to think I was good but this was a challenge. This was get up and change your life. Stop sitting around crying about these people who make fun of you, stop running around in this same circle, stop chasing your tail. Man up and do something with your life. But in the most beautiful way that was like believe in yourself. He was one of the only ones who believed in me, so bedside I had to make a promise to myself to do this shit for him. I’ve since met the most beautiful people, met a beautiful girl, and really came a long way just as a human. Me and Belv played an acoustic show in Asbury with some great people then immediately had to go to this club because we had a walk through. It was a college club on a Thursday - line around the block. Kids EVERYWHERE and lights dancing it was just so insane. We got rushed through the back door, through the kitchen and behind the DJ booth and he debuted our new single F Being Friends and it was crazy seeing ny voice go up in a club like that. It’s also so weird being a straight edge hardcore kid in this whole other world. I always thought my musical life would move forward within an underground culture but instead it flourished in a pop normie mainstream world and it’s a culture shock. So the owner of the club was feeding us all drinks, all heavy alcohol except the Red Bull’s she kept handing me. I was wired white girl sugar wasted dancing to gods plan like nobody’s business. Then we shot back to the show we played an hour before and it was all love. The juxtaposition of these two genres being parallel with each other is so funny to me I love it. Belv hit me last minute to be in this documentary about Hip Hop and the growth of it in the area. It’s with the producers of Impractical Jokers, and featured in it is Method Man, Bon Jovi, hella poppin DJs and it was a blessing. It was setup like drink champs we all sat in a circle in the back of a cigar shop. Cameras everywhere and everyone was smoking and it was just open discussion. It was wild. Belv squashed a crazy beef on camera between him and some crip and it made me happy. I don’t think a lot of those kids knew how much about rap I know and been a part of. I think they just think I’m the white kid next to Belv. But I’ve been a part of this culture since I was in middle school from rapping, to making beats on demo versions of Fruity Loops to painting graffiti on 287, freight and clean trains, to being around gang culture because I was always fighting. So when I had a strong opinion I think people were taken back. I think everyone should have a strong opinion about Shit they care about in general. It means you got passion. I felt grateful to be a part of that experience and the other documentary we are in. I didn’t really realize what dark city lights is doing because I’m always onto the next shit but I’m proud and happy it was a POSITIVE mark on this little subculture. This morning I signed some papers for my album. Put the order in for vinyl. And it has a release date. What a trip. Striking deals as an independent artist, with the same companies everybody my age is striking, as a signed artist. I learned from watching the absolute nothing these people are getting. It’s insane. Go against the grain and don’t conform. These people don’t know shit about anything and I swear they walk around like their gods knowing what’s good. I’m literally ready for Christmas. Like let’s fucking get it. Snow Christmas trees lights frank Sinatra fireplaces cute porches. Who’s going to come with me this Christmas and drive around Asbury looking at cute porches? Lmk. I’m rambling now. I’m happy. I’m drinking my pumpkin spice coffee outside typing this on my phone while I listen to music. Waiting for Rob to come by so we can kill off these two videos. After that we got a few more and were Gucci. I can’t wait to finish this song with Chad B, it’s fire. Same with Arsonal. They’re two great artists that I think are gunna be stoked when they hear this shit. I like working with people like this and offering them something they don’t already got and kinda taking a step back and looking at their catalogue and being like okay this is a hole I can fill. But you gotta be super dialed into the game to understand the threshold of what’s even possible within the realm of failure and success and where an idea could fall between those two. I dropped a flier with 4 shows I’m doing in Canada. I had an interesting outcome with that. People were hitting me up like crazy which I loved but it’s wild to think oh shit a lot of these new people are form a foundation that is built off of this new attention from the past year. They haven’t seen that what I do and been doing for 10 years is touring. So to get that reaction as if I’ve never done this was a TRIP and I LOVED it but wild. Tour is what I do and what we do and the end goal. I’ve toured 14/15 countries arguably 16 as an indie artist in 3 different genres from basements to arenas then took a year off to record and now these little dates are to just get back in the saddle. Okay robs here back to work I go. Brb. Okay I’m back. It’s 3:39 am and I’m pounding coffee in unreleased 115 merch editing all these music videos. I killed off 2 tonight. I’m a psycho and need everything to be how I envision it so I have to direct and edit everything myself. It’s such a good feeling having this shit done. I’m now watching the new Mozzy press run for his new album. I love this dude he’s such a poet it’s crazy. Pac of the modern times. I run miles to his music and when my life was down his records really pushed me to better myself. That and wins and losses by meek. So crazy. When your backs up against the wall and it feels like it’s you against the world that’s some good work to push through it. I haven’t been seeing daylight too much or having much human contact these days. I can’t wait to just get back into the world after taking care of all of this. I pray that this shit opens doors and is accepted well, if not I’m proud of it all. The other night I was driving around and ended up in Asbury and I hit the Gallery real quick and there was a sea hear now event and I walked in and Danny and Rachel told me to play a song and threw me a guitar and within minutes I was on stage with Danny and it really dawned on me how beautiful life is. How is that possible? To see music touch people. To be a part of that. To be wanted to sing. To kind hearted actions of these beautiful people is so inspiring and I’m a student to them when it comes to being the best person I can possibly be. Saturday Jesse Malin is playing the fest and I wanna catch his set then shoot up to Rahway and catch Albee Al at his jersey show. I’m stoked and happy. I’m gunna be up all night and day again. Probably going to go for a walk and listen to music. I feel inspired and I feel humbled. Stay inspired stay weird stay young and stay hungry!!!!!!!

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monkeyandelf · 6 years

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New Post has been published on Buzz News from Monkey & Elf |

New Post has been published on https://www.monkeyandelf.com/10-shows-that-shook-2017/

10 Shows That Shook 2017

While the harsh realities of Brexit, Trump, and five more years of Conservative rule continue to hit home, the unifying force of music at least provided some kind of escapist respite. Not least when it comes to watching live music, which despite worldwide austerity has not diminished one iota for an eager audience only too willing to immerse themselves at every given opportunity.

Its becoming increasingly important – essential even – for musicians to maintain a presence in the live market which accounts for the growing amount of shows many acts play every year. What that makes for is an exciting arena where barely a single evening passes by without an unmissable event of some sort happening in your town, your city, or somewhere nearby. The ever-increasing popularity of bands like Wolf Alice and Idles is largely down to their relentless activity as live bands having played well over 200 shows between them this year. Likewise, the resurgence of acts like Slowdive and LCD Soundsystem, culminating in two of 2017’s best-loved albums, was largely due to both reasserting themselves through the power of live performance prior to releasing new material.

For me, 2017 has continued where its predecessor left off. From January to December I’ve taken in nearly 400 shows and 28 festivals involving almost 2000 sets, and here, after much deliberation, are the 10 which stand out from the crowd.

—

Arcade Fire @ Baths Hall

Scunthorpe 07.06.17

One of the most eagerly anticipated comebacks of 2017 saw Arcade Fire return with a new album, and after hearing its lead single ‘Everything Now’ on the first day of June, their same-titled long player was a mouth-watering prospect indeed. That the rest of the album didn’t quite match its opening salvo wasn’t relevant at this point, seven weeks before the record’s arrival.

As a precursor to the album, the band announced a handful of low key dates including this one in the unlikely setting of Scunthorpe. Situated in rural Lincolnshire with a capacity set at just over a thousand, this would be as exclusive as it got to witnessing Win Butler and co’s musical circus in the flesh. What’s more, they didn’t disappoint with an hour and a half long set that focused more on the band’s back catalogue than the forthcoming new record they were promoting. With a stage set in the middle of the hall like a boxing ring which was accessible from all angles, Arcade Fire threw one of the summer’s most prestigious parties. Sadly 24 hours later we’d all wake up to a new Tory government led by a Mini-Me version of Margaret Thatcher, but for one glorious evening, all thoughts of austerity and despair were extinguished from our minds.

Bloody Knives @ Rough Trade

Nottingham 22.03.17

Some things really are worth waiting for, and in the case of post-punk noise specialists Bloody Knives their first visit to the UK was one that will be remembered for a very long time. Ever since putting out their first album Burn It All Down back in 2010, they’ve been one of the most sought-after outfits on the shoegaze and noise rock scenes.

Playing a free show above a record shop on a Tuesday evening in March might not bring out the best in many a lesser outfit, but this Texan three-piece played a brutally visceral set as if their lives depended on it. Speaking to Rough Trade’s sound engineer afterwards he said it was the most devastatingly loud set he’d ever worked on, while the band themselves seemed genuinely surprised so many had turned out to see them.

The good news is they’re back in the UK next autumn to terrorize ears and sound desks in equal measures. You have been warned!

Confidence Man @ The Deaf Institute

Manchester 05.12.17

It was around this time last year that a booking agent friend told me about a new band his agency would be working with in 2017. They’d only played a handful of shows back in their native Australia but had just signed to Heavenly Recordings over here on the back of their first single. That band was Confidence Man and the single was ‘Boyfriend (Repeat)’. It might have sounded out of kilter alongside whatever else was in vogue at the time but after a couple of listens, it was clear this would provide the following summer’s soundtrack.

Fast forward to May and three shows at Brighton’s Great Escape, and the buzz surrounding Confidence Man had already spread like wildfire. Another three shows at Glastonbury two months later saw their fanbase rapidly increase even more so it was little surprise their first headline tour of the UK during the first week of December would sell out in advance. With several musicians and the whole of the band’s record label in attendance, this show at Manchester’s Deaf Institute turned into the unofficial Heavenly Christmas Party.

As for the show itself, they’re pretty much the complete package. While all eyes are on the front pairing of Janet Planet and Sugar Bones, the veiled musicians behind them provide the perfect backbeat to a repertoire that’s jam-packed full of big, party-fuelled pop tunes. Get Down!

Six By Seven @ The Maze

Nottingham 04.03.17

If ever a case of right place wrong time could be applied to music it would have to be about Six By Seven. Arguably one of the most innovative guitar bands of the past two decades and understandably tipped for great things at the turn of the century, that bands like Coldplay and Elbow went onto filling stadiums while Six By Seven continued to play intimate venues in their native city of Nottingham might seem a travesty in itself.

But then if they’d have crossed over to the mainstream in the same way as the aforementioned, who’s to say it wouldn’t have resulted in major label marketing strategists interfering with the band’s ethos? Anyway, almost seventeen years after Six By Seven’s original line up last shared a stage, they put their differences to one side and got back together for what was undoubtedly one of 2017’s most sought-after tickets. Playing two sets here – one to commemorate the 17th birthday reissue of highly revered second album The Closer You Get and the other a band-selected “Best Of” encompassing the first four years of their existence – Chris Olley and co didn’t so much roll back the years but reignite a level of interest in a band who’ve been criminally ignored for so long.

A simply magical evening.

Eyre Llew @ The Glee Club

Nottingham 10.11.17

There’s nothing more satisfying than watching a band blossom out of humble beginnings into the gargantuan beast standing before us today. Take Eyre Llew for example, a three-piece borne out of years of playing in unsuccessful bands, spurred on by a combined love of ambient, post-rock, and classical music.

Despite having only played their first ever show just two years ago, they’ve steadily grown into one of the most dynamic live bands on the circuit. Yet at the turn of 2017, it seemed like all wasn’t well in the camp. Lacklustre shows at Sheffield’s Outlines and Derby’s 2Q festivals suggested they’d reached something of a crossroads resulting in a complete overhaul of their live set. That it paid dividends would be something of an understatement, and over the second half of 2017 they’ve astounded audiences all around the world with one of the most beautifully orchestrated shows around.

However, November’s album launch in their native city’s Glee Club that really brought it home just how far they’ve come in such a short space of time. Here’s to an even better 2018!

Idles @ The Adelphi

Hull 03.08.17

The undisputed band of 2017. It’s almost unthinkable that this time last year Idles were barely known outside the city of Bristol. Even after plugging away for the best of a decade, they’d become something of an anomaly in the local scene there. So it’s to their credit that they emerged in January with an album that captured the zeitgeist so impeccably. Brutalism lives up to its name in every conceivable way, inspired by social inequality and escapism in equal measures, it’s a record that will be looked back on in future years as a landmark of its times similar to the first Clash record or More Specials.

However, it’s the live show where most people experienced Idles for the first time and what incredible shows they were. Having first encountered them at Eurosonic in January and endeavouring to see them at pretty much every festival in between, they became something of a must-see attraction throughout the year. Every performance became an event with no two sets ever the same. Indeed picking a favourite Idles show for this year proved a nigh on impossible task, but August’s low key show at Hull’s Adelphi as part of the 53 Degrees North conference took some beating.

Supported by the excellent Life and False Advertising, it soon became apparent to everyone present this was one of those “I was there!” moments people talk about in years to come. The world is their oyster in 2018 and only a fool would bet against them owning that too. In the words of one of their songs, they may have always been poor, but we were certainly never bored.

Senseless Things @ Shepherd’s Bush Empire

London 25.03.17

Back in the early 1990s, guitar bands of a left field persuasion would regularly set up camp in the higher echelons of the UK singles chart. One of those bands whose name appeared several times were Senseless Things, a four-piece from the suburbs of London. Fuelled by a shared love of bands like Husker Du, Buzzcocks, and The Replacements, they attracted a rabid army of devotees who’d follow them up and down the land whenever on tour. Which was pretty much twelve months a year. Every year. They put out four albums during their decade-long existence, eventually calling it a day in 1995 as Britpop swallowed everything in sight that wasn’t bathed in nostalgia or a moth-eaten union jack.

So it was something of a surprise that they announced their return at the end of last year, particularly as all four individual members had gone on to achieve varying levels of success ever since. Fast forward to late March and it was almost like they’d never been away. A warm-up show at Hull Adelphi the weekend before lit the touch paper for what was to follow in the main event. And what an event it was. Playing a set encompassing the unsurpassable highlights of their back catalogue alongside the band’s first (and hopefully not last) new recording for over 20 years ‘Lost Honey’, Senseless Things owned Shepherd’s Bush for one glorious spring evening. The first of (too) many more to come? We sincerely hope so.

Slowdive @ The Arts Club

Liverpool 28.03.17

When Slowdive reformed in 2014 they made it clear from the outset there was unfinished business. Their reunion was anything but an exercise in nostalgia, and when their first album for 22 years arrived in March, it proved to be one of 2017’s most distinguished and ultimately forward-thinking records.

Prior to its release, the band scheduled a bunch of low key warm-up shows and their hour and a half long set at Liverpool’s tiny Arts Club venue was undoubtedly one of the finest of their career. Exhibiting sonic perfection from start to finish, their expertly selected mix of material from both back catalogue and forthcoming album was breathtaking in its execution while providing an insight into what was to follow. Which Slowdive delivered in every conceivable way.

Thee Oh Sees @ Rock City

Nottingham 16.05.17

The previous time I saw Thee Oh Sees frontman John Dwyer was confronting a bunch of security guards at a holiday camp in North Wales. Playing the penultimate All Tomorrow’s Parties event in Prestatyn, he’d (rightly) taken exception to the way fans were being manhandled, the tipping point being an assault on a female crowd surfer resulting in her being thrown out the venue and Dwyer threatening to stop the show until she was allowed back in and the security team started treating the audience with respect. The bouncers backed off, the fan allowed back in and the band resumed playing one of their most brutal sets to date.

I say “to date” because that was two years ago. Since then they’ve released three albums and acquired a second drummer, enhancing their sound to almost catatonic levels. At first the decision to play Nottingham’s 2000+ capacity Rock City may have been an ambitious one for a band who’ve become something of an underground word-of-mouth phenomenon. However, all tickets soon sold out in advance, and their blistering textbook exercise in psychedelic garage rock turned the dancefloor into arm flailing moshpit of blood and sweat, ultimately creating one of the most memorable evenings that venue has housed in a very long time.

Wolf Alice @ The Venue

Derby 16.08.17

2017 will be remembered for many things and one of those must surely be the unstoppable ascent of Wolf Alice. Already assured of the award for the most hard working band in rock thanks to a relentless tour schedule that doesn’t seem to have ceased since 2014, they came back with a flawless second album which delivered on every level, highlighting them as one of the most distinctive yet musically diverse bands on the planet right now.

This show at The Venue in Derby was the first of a week-long tour road testing material off their then-forthcoming second record, and from the moment ‘Don’t Delete The Kisses’ introduced them to an awestruck crowd it became obvious Visions Of A Life was certain to be one of this year’s finest. However, what this show also demonstrated was how much they’d developed as a live band. Confident, assured and determined, with each of the band’s four members’ personalities shining through, it felt like the last time we’d get to see them in a rooms of this size, a point reaffirmed November’s sold out tour of 2000+ capacity venues. Arenas surely beckon, and deservedly so too.

—

Honourable Mentions

While the aforementioned 10 stand out for reasons mentioned above, there were numerous other shows which caught the eye in what’s been another incredible year for live music. The Killers headline performance at BBK Bilbao and subsequent world tour reiterated why they’re still held in such high regard as one of the most formidable live acts in the world. Similarly, Black Rebel Motorcycle Club‘s showstopping performance at Nottingham Rock City in November reminded us why people still care so much sixteen years after their debut while wetting the appetite for January’s eighth record Wrong Creatures. The return of Liam Gallagher in June at Brixton’s Electric venue might have raised eyebrows among those that saw him as a spent force after Beady Eye, but they were all proved wrong as he delivered an incredible, vocally flawless set of material old and new. Also rewinding back to the future as if they’d never been away were Nottingham shoegazers Amusement Parks On Fire, their hometown show last month at the Bodega setting the scene for what promises to be an exciting 2018. Elsewhere, Halifax trio The Orielles started the year emphatically at the Hebden Bridge Heavenly Weekender and ended it in similar style on their week-long UK tour, while Glaswegian outfit Spinning Coin rocked Sheffield’s Picturehouse Social in November and look set to do so throughout next year.

Discuss: Which were your favourite live shows of 2017? Who are you most looking forward to seeing next year? Join the discussion over on our music forum.

Eyre Llew photo by Emma Ford Davis.

![105304](http://dis.resized.images.s3.amazonaws.com/540×310/105304.jpeg)

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rubbersoul23 · 7 years

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Ranking The Jobs Of Weston Scott

“To mold the mind of an actor is to bring the clay of life to God and allow him to directly shape a perfect being” – Oliver Platt Part I. Donut Ask, Donut Tell Imagine this scene, if you will. The sun has just risen and the sleepy town of Buellton, California is beginning to thank their pillows for and excellent night’s sleep and exchange their pyjamas for a more formal attire. However, not everyone has spent the past 8 hours with Little Nemo in Dreamland – one soul has been hard at work for several hours. This individual has been toiling away inside the confines of Donut Time as Korean News blares in the background and an old transistor radio exhumes the dying notes of “Walk Like A Man.” The goode toiler cares not for the current events nor the music of yestertear – only to craft the most perfect pastries, pastries that resemble the likeness of a higher power. Though he is a man who you may count on to grab the tongs of power and point you in the direction of the “$5 minimum charge” sign, his name remains a mystery. Of course, it’s only a mystery until you rub the last grain of Mr. Sandman’s magic from your eye and look upon his icing-encrusted nametag – Weston E. Scott.

In early 2016 you may have found him at Donut Time flipping a strawberry fritter into a bag or tickling a buttermilk bar onto a tray for the patron who boldly dines in. Ask him to sing and he’ll belt out a song. Beg him to dance and he’ll float into the air. Offer him a comedy and tragedy mask and he shall embody the spirit of Polonius right before your very eyes. By all accounts, Weston was the world’s most theatrical donut shoppe employee. but what maketh a man of theater so vibrant? Is it the old-fashioned rings and colored sprinkles that inspires one to ascribe to a level of such profound thespian behavior? Or is it the stage and city lights themselves that embue a man with the dramatic strength of 17 oxen? Methinks it is the latter.

Part II. All The World is A Stage and Every City-State A Handsome Stagehand After the donuts had been served and the gorgeous pink boxes had lilted out of the store with a melancholy wave to their friends in waiting, many would think that Weston would prefer his cot and a quilt to the classroom and a chalkboard. What dreams lie ahead of a man who has served sugarplums and festive foodstuffs to loyal subjects? One can only imagine, for Weston does not dream following Donut Time. Nay, instead his automobile propels him to a locale acting academy, where students of the muse stand and pray to the benevolent Dionysus, begging for a mere thimbleful of the wine that shall transform them into an esteemed player. As the children kneel to the works of Bacon, Weston dons his headmaster cape and greets each theater-hopeful individually, straightening their student caps or applying a bit of mascara for those who appears ghostly. As the children take their seats, Weston stands behind his lectern and looks upon each smiling face, channeling the energy of the Bard as he begins to chant, “Power, power, power!” in succession.

The children take notes upon their slates. Simply observing Weston is enough to overwhelm the likes of Kenneth Branaugh, much less a moon-faced child who has been digging through their knapsack for a pen and eraser. As Weston looks upon his pupils, he frequently sees a familiar l’object d’art. Circular, sugar-laden and primed with a hole in the center, he sees a past life looking straight towards him, a donut, incapacitated on the desk of a babe. Still, he does not let this distraction take him away from the stage. Offering a hand to the nearest young mind, he hoists them on the practice stage and allows them to work opposite him in a scene from one of his original productions. For the class session, one lucky individual will have the supreme pleasure of working alongside Scott in order to feel his power as he treads the boards. The thought alone has caused the students to suffer 4 concussions and an assortment of nosebleeds that are quite frankly, too numerous to catalogue. Part III – A Production Reaches Heaven, Kisses The Christ Child, and Swoons Back Down To Earth To best benefit the children, Weston has traditionally used his own works to display range, character and enthusiasm in the theater. Over the years, such titles as Lambs, Are We? and A Cherub Unites Us All have been popular and proven methods in which to reach the students. Currently, Weston is drawing from scenes of his yet-unfinished production, A Sunflower For Icarus. Following the life of a boy (Icarus) who was raised by meadows, many of Weston’s students have found the opportunity to play roles opposite Weston such as “Patient servant” and “Ally of bumblebee.” No other program in the world can offer the original and inventive roles that Weston has crafted, giving those he works alongside a most premium opportunity. “Lease On Life?” reads the front of Weston’s sweater whenever he enters the thespian training grounds. When he whips around, the back reads “Want To Change Your.” To some, this may seem like an audacious sartorial statement. To others, it is the very crux of Weston’s life methodology.

All students in Weston’s classes have received numerous vouchers over the years for 10% off tickets to his productions – when the local playhouses are feeling up to the idea of allowing the man to unleash his feral strength upon the town. To behold Weston teaching is one thing – to see him drift down from the marquee and play the fool and the wise man upon the tortoise? It is nothing short of remarkable. One review of Weston’s one-man show, I, The Cave Within The Mountain, simply read, “To my wife, Helen; dust off my hat. I am lying down in my coffin and reflecting upon the art I have witnessed until I perish.”

Part IV – Shall We Rank The Bakery or Cry Upon A Program

In ranking Weston’s two most recent positions, placing on another is nearly impossible task. In what as truly a blood, sweat, and tears endeavor, your humbled scribe has taken it upon himself to do the unthinkable.

Please note that this list endorses both positions and acknowledges the sacrifice of the workers, the community, and the grace of God’s creatures involved over the course in which Weston has held both positions.

1. “Director’s Assistant”

2. Donut Time Professional

I will accept no contest of this list. If you wish to file a complaint, please send notice to the local list-making guild, who will then pass correspondence on to me. THEN AND ONLY THEN will I entertain the notion of reading dissenting opinions.

Faith in days.

- JT

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mikeyd1986 · 7 years

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DREAM ON DREAMER (ALL AGES & 18+ SHOWS) @ The Evelyn Hotel and BANG! July 2017

On Friday night, I planned a Movie Night at my place for the first time in months. As expected, it turned out to be a massive flop. It wasn’t for a lack of trying though. I tried hard to keep my expectations low and not get myself upset or depressed if nobody showed up but slowly those negative, depressing thoughts were breaking down the walls inside my head (Why can’t I get anyone to hang out with me? Why is it so hard for me to have successful social events? Why do I even bother? Nobody comes anyway).

I guess the silver lining was that some people did RSVP and a few really did want to come. It just never seems to get any easier hearing the same reasons why people can’t make it. Still, I’m glad that I stuck to my guns and went ahead with it anyway. I ordered myself a large Aussie pizza, drank a can of VB and a bottle of pink moscato and watched a few DVDs including Warcraft: The Beginning, Inferno and Rings. I guess there’s nothing wrong with having a night in and trying to enjoy my own company.

Today was a rather ambitious day for me, covering two different gigs over the course of 12 hours. My biggest concern was being able to remain conscious, alert and awake the entire time. Thankfully, I didn’t have to resort to taking no-doz but I did consume a coffee and a couple of beers throughout the day to keep my mind active and ward off any sleepiness.

The good news about today was that I didn’t seem to feel pressured by time. Of course, my plans were all based around what time each gig started but besides that, I didn’t feel like I was in any immediate rush. At the Evelyn Hotel gig, I made a deliberate effort to keep my expectations low when it came to social interaction. Sometimes I really struggle to articulate myself clearly but that doesn’t stop me from trying.

I’ve too often emotionally attached myself to my friends but these relationships often shift and change so I have to adapt to that which is difficult for me. Being an All Ages show, the bar was off limits but they did supply free lollies and jugs of water which I took full advantage of. Despite the modest turnout of 40-50 people, I actually bumped into quite a few people and hung out with Chris Greber and Ursula Kay in between bands.

CAUTION:THIEVES...The last time I saw this Melbourne-based Post-Hardcore/Alternative band was quite some time ago. I honestly can’t remember when but it would have been a couple of years back. There’s been a couple of lineup changes since then including drummer Taylor Douglas and guitarist Chris Meekin (ex-Left For Wolves). Despite best intentions, vocalist Nic struggled to get people to move closer to the stage even though he was quite polite about it. He was more successful at making jokes about being stuck in “football traffic” and delivering some engaging cleans and yells. They played several songs including Years on the Precipice and And You’ll See The End. https://cautionthieves.bandcamp.com/...

CHASING GHOSTS...I’m so fortunate to have caught Jimmy Kyle aka singer-songwriter Chasing Ghosts at this show as I missed out on his recent tour. A couple of weeks back, Jimmy actually reached out to me via social media as I was going through a tough time mentally. I really appreciated it even though I had no intentions of harming myself or suicide. An act like that demonstrates how caring and selfless this man truly is and I was very lucky to have him as a sound board for my issues.

The thing I truly admire about Jimmy is that he has this rough-around-the-edges, no bullshit approach to his lyrical content. He is very much a storyteller, touching on personal real life events from a cousin’s suicide attempt to toxic feelings about his ex-girlfriends. It’s extremely bold and yet he delivers these songs with a sense of black humour to take the edge off them. When he’s playing his acoustic guitar and singing, my attention is instantly drawn to him because his stories are deeply engaging and worth listening to. https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/i...

FOXBLOOD...I believe the last time I saw this Progressive Metalcore band was earlier this year at Your Local. The boys are really accomplished with their sound now from quality melodic samples, passionate vocals and backing vocals and a tight, dynamic stage presence. They have been noticeable quiet in recent months, however some new material is on the cards which is very exciting. They played several tracks from their debut album including Hurricane Hearts, Timeless, No Heroes and Die Young. https://itunes.apple.com/au/album/t...

DREAM ON DREAMER...So part of me had lost interest in this Melbourne-based Post Hardcore band after the release of 2015’s Songs of Soulitude album. It wasn’t a bad album as such but the new musical direction was challenging to get into for me. However, there are so many good songs in their back catalogue that I always manage to get back into them again.

The crowd had a rather lukewarm response initially when the band opened with The World in Front of Me though a few people were bobbing their heads along. It was good to see them blend the old with the new, playing tracks including Darkness Brought Me Here, Hear Me Out, Downfall, Stay and Don’t Lose Your Heart. The set gradually improved though with plenty of hand claps and a few people throwing down towards the end. https://itunes.apple.com/au/album/s...

After the first gig, I had a really good chat with Steven Powell outside the venue before heading off back towards the city. I decided to grab a bite to eat at Chiquito & Co with a burger and a beer. Killing three hours between gigs seemed painful especially since I have a short attention span and remaining mentally focused can be really tough. I met up with a couple of the boys from The Avenue Project outside BANG! and walked back with them to Southern Cross railway station where we hung out at the Public Bar with Ryan, Hayden, Ellen and Bree.

I was beginning to feel a little anxious and bored by the conversations about drugs, sex, relationships and footy though I was too polite to leave the table. I’m at my most introverted whenever I’m with people I’ve only just met and so I didn’t really contribute much at all. Plus I really just wanted to wait outside the BANG! venue with the others. Eventually I made my move and again bumped into Tim Lucas, Chris Mercuri and Bob Corka in the queue.

Being my second time at BANG! for the year, I actually enjoyed myself tonight mainly because I was surrounded by lots of good friends including Mitchell Rawlings, Michael Poida Probst, Jake Mandaliti, Shaun Fuller, James Proctor and members of the bands Spectral Fires and The Avenue Project. The vibes were all positive tonight and I’m glad that I made the effort to come out to both gigs today.

PARKWOOD...This was my first time checking out this Melodic Hardcore band and honestly they weren’t too bad but for some reason, they didn’t maintain my interest for very long. They did manage to get some movement happening in the crowd though and the energy from the band was pretty tight. Make sure you check out their most recent singles “Sin” and “Four Years” here: https://parkwoodau.bandcamp.com/rel...

SPECTRAL FIRES...I don’t think I’ve seen this local Melodic Hardcore/Punk-Rock since late last year. The boys put on a really entertaining set with vocalist Jack getting really loose with the crowd and delivering powerful vocals. Their stage presence was also very impressive and loaded with energy. They played several songs from their Wayfarer EP including New Resolve and Left Behind. https://itunes.apple.com/au/album/w...

THE AVENUE PROJECT...This was basically the band that I was at BANG! tonight for. It was their official launch of their debut EP Havoc. I was extremely humbled and grateful that they give me a physical copy of it. The band were absolutely incredible tonight. The crowd went off from the beginning with people throwing down and mic grabbing. Even bassist Tim and guitarist Bob were getting amongst it and building up that fierce energy. https://itunes.apple.com/au/album/h...

DREAM ON DREAMER...So I didn’t end up staying to see Dream on Dreamer play for a second time as I was buggered by this point and just wanted to head home.

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