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#( just two of them. thats it. two broccoli's. )

cowardlybean · 9 months

Note

your ask button is so tiny it’s so funny

anywho ask game mob psycho fucking all the questions. all of them. i didn’t even read it just answer them all i wanna know

This is gonna be a long ass post :3

the character everyone gets wrong: Tome is a speculative biology enjoyer. thats it thats the post! I also feel like Teruki is more violent than people portray him

a compelling argument for why your fave would never top or bottom: I’mmmm not answering this (cannot decide a fav and most characters are minors lmaooo)

screenshot or description of the worst take you've seen on tumblr : the worst take ever is shipping Reigen and Mob. Gross! Die.

what was the last straw that made you finally block that annoying person?: I haven’t been here long enough to have any annoying people

worst discord server and why: not in any

which ship fans are the most annoying?: if you ship rei//mob. DIE!

what character did you begin to hate not because of canon but because how how the fandom acts about them?: i already hated Mogami (not from a narrative standpoint, i LOVE the Mogami arc its gutwrenching) but aBoT fic made me hate him even more. KILL HIM!!!

common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about: Tome is aroace i don’t make the rules (is projecting) but in all seriousness I Really prefer Mob being aroace because his relationship with Tsubomi really reflects my aromantic experience of making up a crush because that’s what I assume it’s supposed to be

worst part of canon: i love the entire show. sooo. i mean i guess its hard for me to watch Reigen on the psychic tv show bc of secondhand embarrassment kicking my ASS

worst part of fanon: sexualizing middle schoolers

number of fandom-related words you've filtered: idk but they’re all gross ships

the unpopular character that you actually like and why more people should like them: not unpopular in the “people hate her” sense but Tome needs more attention, shes so autism and i love her role in the Reigen manga

worst blorboficiation: I haven’t been here long but I haven’t seen a lot of Dimple character study content, usually he's just there because he's always there

that one thing you see in fics all the time: autistic Mob and trans Reigen (positive)

that one thing you see in fanart all the time: older Mob being taller than Reigen which I think is silly <3

you can't understand why so many people like this thing (characterization, trope, headcanon, etc): idk how popular it is but mob sympathizing with Mogami just. is not my thing

there should be more of this type of fic/art: Reigen in mogamiland, its so interesting to me

it's absolutely criminal that the fandom has been sleeping on...: BROCCOLI ARC BODY HORROR!!!!!!!!!!! Honestly its fucking terrifying already when Mobs friends slowly convert to Dimple-ism but can you imagine. The roots creeping beneath. :3 AND ALSO Reigen having a fear of being on live tv is underrated

you're mad/ashamed/horrified you actually kind of like...: not genuinely ashamed but my guilty pleasure is bashing Reigen over the head with angst

part of canon you found tedious or boring: cant think of any

part of canon you think is overhyped: also cant think of any rn

your favorite part of canon that everyone else ignores: the fact that spirits have the power to brainwash without possessing people?? like Dimples two cults are. terrifying!! bc Mob couldn’t sense a spirit changing their minds bc Dimple was chilling in the broccoli

ship you've unwillingly come around to: not genuinely upset about it but I was so surprised I ended up liking yoshieku (Dimple x security guard) the bond between an evil spirit and the man he randomly possessed is incredible

topic that brings up the most rancid discourse: dunno any

common fandom complaint that you're sick of hearing: also dunno any

#mp100 #mob psycho 100 #cowardly speaks #i havent hung around the fandom long enough tbh its only been a couple months

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onetimetwotimesthreetimess · 2 years

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For Lightwood-Bane family prompts :)

Maybe their food choices and preferences 👉👈

MAX: Max is a very very picky eater. Malec has went through 700 different wars but nothing beats convincing Max to eat healthy. After continuous blackmailing and bribery—they would finally find something that Max likes but Max being the little shit that he is—would refuse to eat that thing the next day. It’s a struggle to find a food good enough for him every single day. This one time, Malec gets so fuxking tired with Max’s theatrics that they took a break from him. They let Max eat whatever the fuck he wanted for a whole ass week. Max got bored of eating ice cream three times a day. He went to Alec and Magnus and asked him why they’re not asking him to eat veggies anymore—do they not love him anymore. Malec gets all soft and feeds him broccoli and all that disgusting shit. Apparently, Max thought that annoying your family 24x7 is a love language. He went back to being a little shit the next day tho.

RAFAEL- Rafael would literally eat anything. He spent years on the streets and some habits are hard to break. Malec notices this and their heart kinda hurts so they try to make Rafe understand slowly and lovingly that he’s allowed to refuse to eat if he doesn’t like smth. (He doesn’t have to be a little shit like Max but he’s still a child and he gets to act out too). One night, Alec goes out to get some water and finds Rafael sneakily eating some cake that they had put in the fridge and he’s scared when his eyes land on Alec but Alec just takes him in his arms and the two of them eats the whole fckn cake sitting on the kitchen floor and if Magnus and Max found them two hours later eating cake—no one has to know about it.

ALEC- Alec has a very refined palette. He didn’t use to but he’s married to Magnus fuxking Bane and that man has taken Alec to a billion fucking dates and introduced every single cuisine on the planet. His favourites are Korean, Indian, Italian, Mexican and Indonesian (because of Rafe and Magnus cause he’s still a fucking simp). Alec is the one who makes everyone eat in their house. You know that one person in the family who eats the broccolis, tomatoes, cashews and all other stuff people remove from their food?? Alec is that out of the four of them. He’s not the best cook but he has the stupidest husband on the planet and two annoying kids who would never eat healthy if he wasn’t there. So he has become a decent cook in the past few years.

MAGNUS- my man’s a mystery okay? And so are his food habits. Magnus doesn’t have a favorite cuisine (except Indonesian). He always always loves to try new things so his favorite meals/cuisines changes every other week. The rest three have learned to keep up with him. However, Magnus appreciates a good comfort meal. New York Pizza, anything Alec cooks for him, Jace’s stupid smoothies (he likes it for some reason. He steals it from that fuxker every single morning), sunday pancakes made my Rafe and Max (do they burn it? Yes. Does Magnus still eat it? no. He magics another ones and pretends like he eat the burnt ones). There are only two rules when it comes to Magnus’s eating habits and thats—1) breakfast is THE most important meal. (Which is already canon yk so), 2) the four of them have atleast one meal together as a family every day.

#I hope you liked them 🌻#magnus bane #malec #alec lightwood #lightwood bane family #rafael lightwood bane #max lightwood bane #eeshu is in feels again #eeshu writes

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yaraneechan · 3 months

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Also thank you for the tag! I also will try to whip it up but in the meantime as a ageswap fic writer I have to ask about Ageswap post wd arc!

fellow age swap fan! :D

This one is a small specific scenario I wanted to play with without worldbuilding too much. Still in a very early writing stage. Sadly shou sucks a bit in this one, B- parenting tag

It doesn't matter how touichirou managed the world domination attempt. But after! When the government tries to take him, the gang find out two things

1) This 12 year old kid has been living on his own for 2 years

2) His dad has been in jail for two years over an unpaid debt

Teru is the one who bails shou out without really filling him in. And they go to.. Touichirous? place. Shou has no idea what happened and is dismissive of ritsu and teru (mob isn't with them on the first day).

He talks about how he taught Touichirou how to take care of himself so he can live on his own just fine (what should he have done? Relied on others to take care of touichirou? He relied on someone for money look where he ended up). He doesn't realize the crushing loneliness touichirou felt or that he hates him now, or the fact that he attempted world domination. A lot of the things he says hurt touichirou without shou realizing it until touichirou lashes out.

“He's fine” shou there is literally a giant broccoli right outside your window.

Teru is fiiiine (he's very not) “oh look thats my trauma” *watches touichirou yell at shou while eating popcorn*. He's very much on touichirou’s side on this.

Ritsu is the one actually helping the suzuki family communicate thank god.

Cue shou trying really hard to make up with touichirou while touichirou is mad at him, depressed about failing world domination, depressed about a break up he doesnt want to talk to shou about, and feeling trapped because he’s too used to living alone so shou being back makes him claustrophobic, and the whole “dont do this or that so the government doesnt take you” situation. Touichirou is having a horrible time.

They need to figure out the plan because touichirous on house arrest for now and shou will have to meet government agent occasionally and mob is supposed to mentor him.

I thought about scrapping this but I do like some dialogue ideas and teru having fun watching shit go down. It might be too similar to another idea I have tho

#ask #thank you!#ygodmyy20 #mine

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gaillol-13 · 1 year

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So when I watched HFA AO I felt like recreating the fruit monsters and giving them some lore. Enjoy!

First up we have Broccoli overlord. As you can see, he now has a more alien-like appearance. Each bud has either a mouth or eyes and the two thicker sets of stem with the spikes are the equivalent of arms, equipped with spikes for battle. These veggie villains have a habit of terraforming planets, enslaving other aliens, blah blah blahhh, and other average evil alien stuff. Don't let their barbaric nature fool you, their as cunning as they are floral.

Origin: So I somehow managed to piece everything and have the concept of sentient foods living on earth actually make sense. The Alien Broccoli isnt actually the Broccoli we have on earth (though I guess at this point its obvious) but a carnivorous plant race that just happen to look like Broccoli.

This giant maw is in the center of their head and is pretty much like a venus fly trap (there's actually four leaf jaws, but two was easier to draw). Anyway terraforming is hard when the population in their galaxy is scarce, so the Broccoli's technology is oozing with mutating radiation. They drop some on a inhabitant planet or two to (quite literally) bring it to life and then wait a while to kill it (kinda like what we do when growing plants.). As you can guess by now, the tech dropped on earth, and...well, here we are. The radiation can be more extreme or ineffective to some objects than others, which is why there are non-living food, sentient foods, and foods that are monsters. And also other bizarre creatures (like the flying honey badger).

Next. The Ice Scream

I really enjoyed the concept of this one. Ice Screams were once normal frozen treats, that were then lost in the freezer by time, and eventually decayed into spirits with bodies of absolute ZERO. They have adapted to carve burrows with their claws and frost breath. Due to their souls being corrupt, their vulnerable to any source of heat and will perish if exposed, thats why they need a body. In cold weather, their able to roam outside their territory and catch a host by paralyzing their victims with their cold glowing eyes and eardrum-shredding screech (those vocals are also used to make gorgeous melodies to lure said victims). As you can see from the art, there are many ways to tell if the victim is possessed: Constant twitching, sneezing, shivering, glowing eyes, visible breath, cold af, will avoid hot things at all costs, and frozen skin/peel.

They come in many forms and flavors and sometimes might have extra appendages.

Next up: Marshmellow peeps

I figured they'd be kinda like the dinosaurs in the AO world, not much to say other than that.

Next is...Vampire Fruit bat!!

This one might have been my favorite to remake. One of the things I wanted to change was their non-bat forms (sorry but that goofy ah fairy ain't gonna cut it), I thought for a moment and went "Hey! Since most Fruit bats have orange fur, what about a Blood orange!" And here we are! They've got a black aura and leave a trail of petals from their latest victim (basically, whichever fruit they ate, the flower petals of the same fruit will appear). And I gave their outfit fall colors that not only match the vampire fruit bat's red markings, but also fits with the October vibe!

And there you have it! Let me know if you want an AO creature redrawn.

#annoying orange #ao monsters #Broccoli overlord #drawing #this was alot of fun to do.

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shokoraa · 2 years

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Way Down We Go

By: Monkeygirl77

Summary: Tsukuachi shakes his head. “You’re going to eat those words.” He turns back to the boy in the interrogation room. “How long as he been here?” At least, at this question, All Might has the decency to appear at least a bit ashamed. “Nearly twenty hours.” “You’ve been interrogating a minor for nearly twenty hours!” He can’t help but raise his voice, and skillfully ignores the eyes that turn to him from behind, staring at the two heroes in horror. “We’ll all be lucky if he doesn’t slaughter us for what’s been done to his boy!” The human lie detector jabs a finger in Erasureheads chest. “Prepare to start eating your words.” And turns to open the door to the interrogation room, he’s just got one question, one question to clear this all up, before he brings in their inevitable downfall.

Status: Incomplete Updated: Feb. 12, 2021

Words: 14,664 Chapters: 3/?? Language: English

Fandom: 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia

Rating: Not Rated

Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Category: Gen

Characters: Midoriya Izuku, Shinsou Hitoshi, Todoroki Shouto, Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead, Tsukauchi Naomasa, Yagi Toshinori | All Might, Takami Keigo | Hawks

Relationship: Midoriya Izuku & Takami Keigo | Hawks, Shinsou Hitoshi & Takami Keigo | Hawks, Takami Keigo | Hawks & Todoroki Shouto, Midoriya Izuku & Shinsou Hitoshi, Midoriya Izuku & Todoroki Shouto, Shinsou Hitoshi & Todoroki Shouto, Hero Public Safety Commission & Takami Keigo | Hawks, Hero Public Safety Commission & Midoriya Izuku

Additional Tag: I know, I'm Sorry, I've noticed that everyones probs super ooc, its a problem i have, im sorry, Please Forgive me, but - Freeform, anyway, tagging, New Public Hero Safety Commission, What I mean, they got restaffed, the new regime are not assholes, and to compensate for what the last one did to Hawks, they basically do what ever he wants them too, he's literally the most dangerous hero in the game, Suspected Traitor Midoriya Izuku, Someone bruised the baby bird, Hawks is PISSED, Sarcastic Midoriya Izuku, Sarcastic Todoroki Shouto, Sarcastic Shinsou Hitoshi, Midoriya Izuku has a potty mouth, let the broccoli boy cuss, Tsukauchi knows whats up, don't piss off Hawks, He will rain hellfire down on you, Midoriya Izuku is a child of Chaos, Adopted Midoriya Izuku, Adopted Shinsou Hitoshi, Adopted Todoroki Shouto, Sort Of, thats a work in progress, Hawks wants to know why he keeps attracting delinquent heroes in training, Everyone agrees, it's because he fed them, dont feed the animals, theyll always come back for more, Abused Shinsou Hitoshi, Parental Takami Keigo | Hawks, Bird Documentary watching, as Izuku says, pun fucking intended, Izuku has a hitlist, Endeavor is on it, Concerning but not surprising, Midoriya Izuku is a Little Shit, Shinsou Hitoshi is a Little Shit, Todoroki Shouto is a Little Shit, Hawks loves them anyways, Sometimes he questions as to why he does, but he loves them, Yagi Toshinori | All Might Bashing, Yagi Toshinori | All Might Being an Asshole, Quirkless Midoriya Izuku, Quirkless Discrimination (My Hero Academia)

#ao3 #mha fanfic #hawks #deku #midoriya izuku #shinsou hitoshi #shinso hitoshi #shoto #todoroki shoto #todoroki shouto

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flockofdoves · 2 years

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made so much japanese curry udon. was gonna make half the box of the curry roux but then doubted myself and was like w/e i’ll do the whole thing since thats more efficient i’m tired this week and itll be nice to have leftovers

but i kinda regret that. i thought it seemed like there were slightly too many onions in following the box recipe (it was hot vermont apple and honey curry) but it was a perfect amount of onions for the size and i maybe could love even more in it. but there was just not nearly enough room in the pan for the amount of onions. even though i planned it out and did a bunch of batches (making it take way longer than it couldve been if they fit better) it still was overcrowded after they cooked down to where i wanted them, so the chicken thigh pieces i put in didnt brown barely at all just kinda steamed

i didnt feel like there were enough potatoes following the box instructions and even after adding an extra potato i still thought there could be more

didnt have fresh carrots so after all that was done sauteeing i just put in frozen mixed vegetables but instead of even vaguely trying to sautee those i should have put them in towards the end of it simmering bc the broccoli and cauliflower got a bit too mushy

used two types of mixed frozen vegetables and i usually love peas but the peas in the peas and carrots bag i put in just tasted really weird im worried they werent frozen properly either at the store or from me taking a while before getting home after grocery shopping. i noticed they were barely frozen by the time i got home yesterday. so like i guess worried about food poisoning maybe but i just made so much and was so tired after cooking so long that i just picked them all out i’ll hope for the best lol :(

the curry roux itself was good in its consistency, none of the weird waxiness or graininess of some shittier ones ive had before, the flavor was decent but even though it was “hot” it literally just wasnt spicy in the slightest so i added a bunch of gochugaru and shichimi togarashi and italian red pepper flakes and ginger powder and some curry powder to make it a bit spicier and more complex but even then since there was just So Much Curry even with dumping a bunch of spices in it barely made a dent in the flavor and i kinda gave up

i put in slightly more than the 1.1 pounds of meat it called for and it still was not enough

it wouldve maybe also benefited from some hard boiled eggs and more vegetables in general despite how much i felt like i put in

i think my conclusion in the future is that i’ll make half as much from now on and use my widest pot, i would follow the proportions for onions in halving it but keep the same amount of potatoes and meat as the original and would try to actually have fresh carrots. i was worried about overcooking the meat but if there werent as many onions then maybe i’d just brown the meat first thing and add the onions right after. if i had broccoli or something id put it in way towards the end.

#cpost #food blogging

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mo0dy-succubus · 7 months

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Random things abt me that literally Noone asked for (pt 2)

1. I have a high tolerance for sour food and candy. If you give me a lemon I'll eat it without cringing, idk tho someone suggests me some sour candy to try to make me cringe

2. I hate vegetables (me and soyeon are the same fr 🥲) despite both of us hating it tho,I hate vegetables for the taste while soyeon hate it for the texture. The only vegetables I can eat are lettuce in a salad,spinach, cucumbers and tomatoes if those count(???) Carrots only if they are in soup and broccoli of it from the Chinese store, I can't do regular broccoli tho it's disgusting.

3. I have a nose piercing and I want to get another one maybe two more? I want my other nostril pierced and my septum

4. I hate needles and I'm very scared of them, you might be wondering how did I manage to get my nosed pierced huh? Well well well...I made my mom hold my hand thats why, IT WAS PAINFUL, IT HURTS LIKE A BITCH.

5. I remember on my first day of high-school, freshman year, I got lost and had Both a panic attack and anxiety attack bc I was lost

6. I have a cat named navy he is 1 year old and will be two in march

7. I happen to have alot of problems with ppl named Tyler (so if your name is Tyler stay away from me :) jkkkk it might just be a coincidence tho)

8. I'm deathly afraid of spiders, I have major phobia of them.

9. I can't snap my fingers

10. My Starbucks order is a caramel ribbon crunch frappuccino, specially extra everything but a regular amount of whip

11. If you can't tell I have a big sweet tooth

12. Drinking coffee gives me the jitters

13. i like drawing

14. I love plays and musicals

15. I was in a musical in 3rd grade as the "main star"

16. Heather's the musical>>>>>>>

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meganuzlockediary · 9 months

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Pokemon Black! The Sacrifice to Skyla

22nd July

OMG this section was annooyingly tough. with my pokemon not quite fully evolved against a great mix of threats I have really had to be prepared looking up every trainer battle and constant healing items.

Chargestone cave is the first challenge and annoyingly the Plasma grunts are frustratingly difficult. There are a few close calls all along mostly because I had not prepared many healing items to get through.

With that said! N was a walkover! With Pignite I just plowed through his entire team!

Next up is celestial tower. Getting there is a pain I try to avoid trainers but it only means I accidently walk into them when I am not prepared. Eventually I methodically work my way through them. I realise 5 members on the team isn't cutting it so I employ Blitzle which I quickly evolve using exp share and luck eggs into a zebstrika. Hoping it will be a good way to counter Skyla.

Then Celestial tower is a pain. Lots of unavoidable battles with psychic types which I have very little defence too. I slowly make my way to the top and breath a sigh of relief beofre realising... I can't escape rope down. So I sneak my wa down hoping to avoid many more battles as I am close to the level cap.

Surprisingly Mirstralton gym is not too bad. With a mix of Zebstrika and Boldore I burn through the gym hitting the level cap perfectly. I look at Skylas gym and go in with full confidence leading with Zebstrika!

Swoobat with Heart stamp deserves HELL! I send in zebstrika hoping for an easy win. One heart stamp... I flinch. Two Heart stamps... I flinch and now am at half health! Three Heart stamps! Furious I switch into Boldore who flinches to a fourth heart stamp! You'd think this was a serene grace pokemon! Fortunately a single rock slide is all thats needed for the next turn but Boldore is brought to about a third health in the process!

Next in is Swanna and now I have no good counter. I switch into Palpitoad hoping to eat up the bubble beam but no... newtural damage. It takes a lot as well while I confuse swanna with supersonic and switch into audino. I cannot charm here but I can paralyse. I Spam Secret powers but am eventually brought pretty low. I switch into boldore to take an air slash. While its not super effective it is a special attack so gets him down to 5hp! I switch back inot Lucy for the regenerator health and a critical hit Air slash crushes her! I am so upset. I have no good counters I am forced to go into to Simisage! I use bite which get her down to red. She flinches! And then hyper potions. To see if it does anymore I use seed bomb! It's neutral damage so does a damn decent amount of damage! allowing me to finish it off with just 20 or so hit points!

Last out is unfezant and Broccoli is in a tough spot. However, I have faith. I use Leech seed as she uses Leer. Then its seed bomb to victory which fortunately works perfectly getting unfezant quickly ro red. A quick attack of hers gets broccoli and knocks him down to only 1hp! Then leech seed finishes her off!

And here I though I had that battle in the bag. Utterly terrible luck in the begginning brough me real low there and cost me Audino. I don't think losing Audino is that big of a deal but it is still upsetting. Next battle is Bryce and his ice types so with Embore and hopefully Gigalith that will be a comfortable battle. You never know though with this game.

Badges won: 70

Pokemon lost: 34 (RIP Audino :()

Pokemon used: 155

#Pokemon #Pokemon black #nuzlocke #nuzlocke challenge #gen 5 #unova #gym battle #loss

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ppnuggie · 2 years

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　　　　TFP x reader

　　　『　megatron ,, starscream ,, dreadwing ,, breakdown ,, ratchet ,, wheeljack ,, gender neutral human reader 』　

　　-> gn human s/o who uses snapchat filters on the bots

　　— sfw ,, crack ,, fluff

　　— some hcs of this bc it popped into my head 😵‍💫😵‍💫

　　ratchet ::

• bro dont give two fucks about your silly little filters ,, the only time he does is when miko and your’s laughter becomes too annoying for him

• he demands to know what it is that’s so funny !! why are you laughing at him ?? hes super confused ,, frustrated ,, and angry

• not until you show the picture of him w/ a bald head does he know the cause ,, hes very angry about this ,, what made you think this was okay ??

• he just sighs and goes back to work ,, not bothering to humor the two of you anymore

• though when he catches word that you used a filter on optimus and he got saddened by it ,, you bet he’ll be on your ass about it

• prepare for long scolding session 😵‍💫😵‍💫

　　wheeljack ::

• he loves the filters ,, only when theyre not being used on him

• he’s a bad influence ,, and always convinces you and miko to use the filters on ratchet and ultra magnus ,, when you do the three of you are laughing like hyenas

• he does cover up for you two when magnus asks about the commotion ,, and hopefully he hadn’t seen the picture

• sometimes the filters work on bulkhead ,, so he asks to two of you to use some of the good ones on them ,, but being the little sly devils you are

• the said picture of wheeljack and bulkhead having hearts above their helms turns into them having broccoli heads

• ya’ll are quick to hurry and send it to raf and jack before wheeljack makes you delete it

　　megatron ::

• as a decepticon hostage ,, its easy for you to use the filters on whoever ,, an unsuspecting vehicon ,, maybe knockout ,, and very many times one starscream

• megatron does become amused at this technology ,, his race may be vastly superior and more high-tech then yours ,, but theyve never come up with something as silly as these filters

• always gives a small chuckle whenever you use one on starscream and show him ,, or like the one time you got a good picture of knockout having his face on a penguin

• never use them on him. he gets super pissy about it ,, so mad ,, you’re hanging by a thread here human ,, now delete that photo of him or its a little taste of death for you

• somehow ,, just somehow ,, the filter worked on soundwave and you were quick to show megatron of your accomplishment ,,

• he was amused by it ,, impressed even ,, but made sure you had got rid of it ,, as he didn’t want to upset his friend by this silly image

　　starscream ::

• hates the filters. theyre always used on him ,, what even are they ???

• always has the drag queen filter used on him ,, and he hates it

• always tries to convince you to do it someone else but it never works out ,, in the end ,, instead of getting a picture of some random vehicon with a broccoli head ,, its him with the broccoli head

• end this seeker abuse 💔💔 all humans are the same 😔🥀🥀

• knockout gets a good laugh out of it though 💪

　　dreadwing ::

• he’s usually too busy thinking about his past or smt to notice you using filters on him

• the only time he noticed is when the room was particularly dark and your flash was on

• immediately ,, he thought someone broke in ,, but nope <33 just you being a silly little human

• he was curious as to what the flash was for ,, and thats when you dropped the balls 😵‍💫😵‍💫 ,, he now knows about the filters

• he doesnt really see them as amusing ,, nor does he really care ,, bro dont give a fuck ,, just don’t get yourself killed over this

• there may be a few bots who don’t enjoy them ,, and if he catches you in a pickle w/ said bots ,, he may just feel willing to help you out of your situation

• use them on him if you want ,, he wont care

　　breakdown ::

• he loves them so much ,, human technology is amazing !! what other filters are there ?? will they work on him !? look ,, his face is blue now !!

• hes so humored by the filters ,, always carrying you around and letting you use filters on different bots

• the vehicons passing in the halls now have smiley faces all over their helms ,, knockout buffing himself in the medbay now has hearts above his helm

• he tries to see if theres other things you can use the filters on ,, like maybe one of knockout’s tools

• gets a bit bummed when it doesnt work ,, but you’re quick to make it up by showing a picture of broccoli head starscream

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parismemes · 2 years

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SENTENCE STARTERS FROM AN ARGUMENT THAT GOT OUT OF HAND.

“windows are doors though just so we're clear” “windows are just mini doors if you really think about it” “the WORLD is against you, ___” “if you have to claim things that aren't doors are doors then you admit your argument is weak” “you were ABOUT to argue that rotating locks are wheels dont even deny it dont even try to deny it” “the waters have been chummed--” “YOU CANT JUDGE THE STRENGTH OF MY ARGUMENT WHEN YOURS IS BASED UPON FALSEHOODS” “look windows are basically like those doors cut in half where its separate and you can swing the top or bottom open independently” “ohhhh LOOK AT THAT, you’re using OUTSIDE SOURCES to win an argument. typical” “NOT THIS SHIT MY COWORKERS HAVE BEEN TALKING ABOUT THIS ALL DAY” “the bees are buzzin!” “also would you count a door twice since it goes two ways or just once” “Windows are doors because I can climb out one” “literally going to climb out my window tonight now” “literally opening and leaving through my window as we speak” “you all are horrible human beings“ “Because I climb out my window door? U can’t take my window door from me” “oh so we're horrible because we're correct” “there is no winning, only chaos!” “don't think you can exclude yourself, you're not an exception” “ok but fruits dont have blood, ___.” “i said fruit juice is the EQUIVALENT OF BLOOD. FOR THE FRUIT” “dont make me bring the kool aid man into this again ill do it ill go there” “hey guys in unrelated news do you think if you turned the kool aid man upside down it would look like a jellyfish a little bit” “fruit juice is NOT equivalent to blood because the fruit does not circulate it” “yeah his fruit juice is jiggling out of there” “KOOL-AID IS NOT FRUIT JUICE” “god i love it when the kool aid man looks like a jellyfish” “IT IS AN ARTIFICIAL BEVERAGE CREATED BY CAPITALISM IT IS NOT FRUIT JUICE” “what is capitalism if not the FRUITS of labor” “capitalism is the EXPLOITATION of labor, it is the exploitation of the fruits and therefore not the fruits itself” “fruit juice is literally also the exploitation of fruits” “the literal point of fruit is to be eaten so that the seeds can be shit out somewhere else” “youre exploiting the fruits for their juice. how does that make you any different than jeff bezos” “i will have a debate about that” “if power corrupts then is capitalism not inevitable, just like fruits?” “power isnt inevitable in and of its self its all a societal construct and therefore man-made” “dolphins don't practice capitalism.” “ok and? humans do and we've got so much history to prove giving someone too much power? is bad. just like. giving someone too much fruit juice. will kill them” “boom bitch eat my kool aid jellyfish” “no i think theyre pretty similar :)” “just because i could probably die from an insane amount of orange juice does not mean that everyone will die from any fruit juice.” “you can die from too much of literally anything that doesn't make it capitalism” “no those are the same thing” “Capitalism deez nuts” “thats like me saying "trees are kind of similar to broccoli" and you replying "OH SO TOMATOES ARENT FRUITS THEN THEYRE JUST SIMILAR TO FRUITS HUH"” “not all windows fit the criteria of doors. but when they do. they ARE doors”

#i only come on here to post stupid shit and disappear for another several months (hello my loyal following)#rp memes #rp meme #ask memes #ask meme #sentence starters #crack

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weaselle · 4 years

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cooking for people who have no idea what they are doing (or are just, like, real depressed)

Okay, I’m a professional cook, but also, I get depressed. This is the cooking I do when I’m depressed, because I need the simplest path to a whole meal.

This is not for vegetarians, because, while I wholeheartedly support people choosing vegetarianism, and also enjoy cooking for vegetarians, for me, the simplest path to a meal includes meat. Perhaps when I am less depressed I will work on options.

A lot of recipes focus on achieving food that is in some way special, using special techniques, or using a precise list of carefully measured high-end ingredients... and that’s not this, this is all the parts of cooking that are not those things.

First, shopping

Meats Starches Veggies Sauces Breakfast/Snack

For a whole week you’re going to want

3 kinds of meat, with five portions each. So, for example, five chicken breasts, 10 sausage links, and 2-3 pounds of ground beef. Other possibilities include pork chops, salmon, some kind of steak, whatever.

You’re going to want up to 3 starches. Honestly I usually stick to just rice, but you can go with rice, potatoes, and pasta. If you want to use quinoa or polenta or something, thats on you.

And, you’re going to want about 3 types of vegetables, again, about 5 portions each -- and try to stay green. So personally, I usually get 5 medium zucchini, 2 medium heads of broccoli, and then either yellow squash or mushrooms. A bag of salad greens is also a good option, and I have an easy way to make a good salad, which I will do as a separate post.

Next pick something easy that works as either breakfast or a snack. For me this is a loaf of bread, a jar of peanut butter, and a bunch of bananas. Sometimes it’s nice to have an additional option here, like cereal or yogurt.

Last, you’ll want 2-5 sauces in bottles. I would definitely recommend a low sodium soy sauce be one of them, and maybe a BBQ sauce for the other. I usually also include worcestershire and sriracha but go with whatever you want, teriyaki sauce, A1, whatever you know you’ll eat. Hell, you can use Italian style salad dressing as a cookable sauce if you really want.

Oh, and If you don’t already have some at the house, you’ll need pan lube: butter and/or some kind of cooking oil.

Okay! we’re done shopping! Affordability isn’t the main focus here, but is undeniably important -- I live in a very expensive area, this shopping trip is going to feed me well for a week and costs me about $100 bucks. When I was living in Alabama, it probably would have cost me more like $70. You won’t need to get stuff like the sauce and rice and peanut butter every week, so you’re definitely looking at a monthly grocery bill of something like $300 depending on where you live, and that’s not too bad.

Prep

hell no, I’m depressed, the only prep I’m doing is putting two packages of meat in the freezer and the rest of this stuff in the fridge. You CAN box or bag each portion of meat separately so you can really alternate what you eat -- me, I’m gonna eat chicken for two or three days, then beef for two or three days, etc.

and listen, don’t fuck around with microwave settings or running water on things to defrost them. If you package the meat all up separately, just move a portion from the freezer to the fridge each time you cook dinner. Or, if you do like me, move the whole package when you go to cook your last portion of the previous stuff, and just deal with the fact that it will probably still be a tiny bit frozen when you go to cook next.

Tip: When you cook dinner, you’re going to make enough for lunch. That just leaves you one small meal - I often smear peanut butter on a peice of bread and wrap it around a banana like a taco - fast, easy, practically no dishes, relatively healthy

____________________________________________________________

Cooking (this is going to take about 25 minutes)

You’re going to need

ONE frying pan, medium size w/ lid ONE boil pot, medium size w/ lid knife, a spatula and a cutting board.

If you want to be fancy, you can include a big spoon. Looks like this

No matter what the specific ingredients you’ve chosen, the basic format is going to be:

Start your starch heat pan, put meat in the pan flip meat and add veggies, cover with lid remove meat and add sauce finish starch put everything on a plate while it is still too hot to eat and you are standing in the kitchen anyway, wash the like, 4 dishes you’ve gotten dirty. eat.

Okay, before you even get everything else out, start your starch. For rice this means rinse the rice and put it in the cold water and set it on high heat, for pasta this means put your salted water on the stove on high heat. For potatoes, you can use my perfect mashed potatoes recipe (I’ll do that as a separate post) or, honestly, you can wait until you’re halfway done with the rest of everything and microwave the sucker for like 8 minutes. I would never do that in a restaurant, but trying to feed my lethargic depressed ass? Absolutely.

easy rice: Fill your smallest coffee cup with rice, put it in the pot. Rinse. Fill the same cup twice with water, add to rice. Bring to a boil, give a good stir, turn heat all the way down, put a lid on it for something like 15 more minutes.

Okay, now lube your pan. Butter, olive oil, whatever. You’re probably looking at an amount more than a teaspoon and less than a table spoon of whichever you use. Personally I try to use as little olive oil as possible, so I pour a large coin sized amount (a quarter in the U.S.) into the pan, ear off a piece of the paper towel I’m going to use as my napkin for the evening, fold it up tight, and sort of paint the oil around so a little goes a longer way.

Pan lubed? Great, turn your burner on. highest heat will work but is not ideal, medium heat will work better but is still not ideal. Halfway between the two is perfect for chicken, a little hotter for beef, a little lower for fish.

Now remove two portions of your chosen protein (that way you’ll have tomorrow’s lunch too). By the time you get the packaging open and stuff, your pan is probably hot. If it’s not, let it get hot. You don’t want the oil to start smoking (warning, butter will burn faster than oil) but if you shake a single drop of water off your finger into the pan, you want it to sizzle.

If your pan is hot, put your meat in. The more you do this, the more you’ll perfect the timing, but you’re going to cook it for ~about~ 7 minutes before you flip it, maybe a couple minutes longer if it’s chicken or pork, maybe a couple minutes less if it’s beef.

Now that your meat is in, prepare your veggie. Rinse it off, cut off any part of it you don’t want to eat, and then cut what’s left into pieces the size of a large bite. Don’t worry, it’s going to get a little smaller when you cook it. Take your time, you’ll probably finish in less time than the meat needs.

Time to flip your meat? Great. Do that, and then dump your chopped up veggie in the pan. It does not matter at all if the pieces are not touching the bottom of the pan -probably most of them will not be, a bunch will be on top of the meat, that’s fine.

Put a lid on it. Now add your pasta to the water, or put your potato in the microwave, or check your rice. If following my perfect mashed potato recipe, mash now.

Rice tip, checking: eat a grain, you want zero crunch. If it’s not done and there’s no liquid, add a splash of water and stir. It it’s done or close to done, but it is still very wet, give it a big stir and leave on the stove with the lid off for a couple minutes.

Your meat still has like, at least 4 minutes, so rinse off your cutting board and chef knife, get out a plate, table knife and fork.

Meat done? Great. Take the meat out of the pan, leaving the veggies in. Add sauce to the pan. I like to also use a little wine, because it’s usually already in the house, if you have some and want to, pour a large swallow of wine in the pan with the sauce. I’ll often mix a couple sauces, like worcestershire and soy (makes something similar to teriyaki) or hot sauce and BBQ

Stir the sauce around with the veggies. This, called deglazing, is an important step for two reasons, 1: it will get up a lot of the flavorful stuff that has stuck to the pan and make your sauce better, and 2: it will make washing the pan much easier. Okay, put the lid back on for one to two minutes, maybe stir a couple times. Basically you want the sauce to stain the veggies.

Your starch should be done, turn off the burner, put a portion on your plate, and stick the rest in a ziplock or tupperware or something. Go ahead and throw the second portion of meat right in there with it.

Turn off the stove and scoop the veggies onto the plate, and pour the sauce from the pan over everything.

Now, while it’s too hot to eat, and you’re standing in the kitchen anyway, wash the pot, pan, and spatula. It should be very easy because of the way you used the sauce and because nothing has had a chance to harden. This usually takes me about 2 full minutes.

__________________________________________________________

OKAY! it’s been 20-25 minutes, you’ve got dinner and tomorrow’s lunch (just add another cut up veggie, pour a different sauce on, and put it in the microwave for two or three minutes) AND there’s no danger of dishes piling up on you :) You can even add “washing last night’s plate and fork for use tonight” to where you rinse the cutting board to really keep it full circle.

It’s not gormet. It IS accessibly healthy, affordable, and easy.

If you are extra depressed, forget the starch and use more veggies; this cuts what little work there is by up to half

Using this format, you can have three good meals per day and only spend 30 total minutes a day in the kitchen — including clean up! (dishes piling up tends to exacerbate my depression and makes cooking your next meal harder)

And it’s easy to give yourself a wide variety, from soy glazed chicken, zucchini and rice one night; to steak, mushrooms and pasta the next; followed by BBQ pork chops, brocoli and potatoes... I suck at math but there’s probably a hundred options

Just to recap, because I know I was very detailed and this might seem overwhelming, once you read through the above to answer any questions you might have, simply

-Start your starch -lube & heat pan, put meat in the pan, about 7 minutes -flip meat, add veggies, lid, about 7 minutes -wash knife and cutting board -remove meat and add sauce to veggies, re-lid, 1-2 minutes -finish starch, refrigerate extra meat and starch -put everything left on a plate -wash pot and pan -eat.

#cooking #food #depression meals

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owlf45 · 3 years

Note

*yeets a few fic recs from the bag*

hits range: 100-30k max

took me a while but hope I'm not late-

ill be sorting them out, since some have some dark themes, while others are oneshots, so ill be arranging them like this:

/°= half warning, aka its at the beginning/end and not the whole fic (like a slowburn, etc.)

°= warning (major character death, etc.)

°°= two warnings (Graphic Deceptions of violence, Major Character Death etc.)

°°°= so on

things in italic are not izuku centered oki

also since they're alot if i put a full description for each it would take days so yep no descriptions :) you're on ur own bud

^^ enjoy

Multi-chaptered fics:

Is a Reaper a Spirit?° (AMAZING. ITS ONGOING AND AMAZING. HIGHLY REC IT)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/27504541/chapters/67256956

Quirk: Gained (gamer izu gamer izu gamer izuku-) https://archiveofourown.org/works/26731861

Orpheus°° (*chefs kiss*)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/13533219

Legacy In Crimson°° (kiri- no dont cry-) (https://archiveofourown.org/works/24153463)

Safety In Fire/° (WHOLESOME)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/21795670

My Hero Academia: Heroes Rising - Alternate Endings°°

https://archiveofourown.org/works/24153463

Phoenix Breath (ever wanted sassy mikumo and chaotic izu? and twin shenanigans? and glorious writing? well this fic is for you!!) https://archiveofourown.org/works/26742970/chapters/65243497

Malware°° (bueatiful. well written. gold. an amazing BR fic that is just way too good its illegal)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/27029674

Learning Curve (a monoma fic for the soul of 1b stans)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/27114007/chapters/66209560

if you could change the past.../° (chaotic izuku at its finest)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/27220240/chapters/66492445

Hope Is The Thing With Wings° (series where izuku *ahem* and hawks saves him so i tw it)

https://archiveofourown.org/series/2000800

Endings And Beggings° (10k hits is nOT enough)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/24856234/chapters/60130390

One for All (No Matter Who You Are)°

(AAAA ADORABLE POKEMON AND IZU CROSSOVER LUV IT-)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/19465498/chapters/46333381

Insomniac: Life Is Hell°°° (its well written and angsty but sadly discontinued :') but give it a try!)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/23412562/chapters/56111065

And It Hurts Like Hell (can people stop hurting bby izu please why-)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/27193849

Inheritance (so... Angsty.. a-afo izuku (kinda)) https://archiveofourown.org/works/27511546

On The Shores Of Freedom (new fic but still great and,,,, exciting) https://archiveofourown.org/works/27648604/chapters/67652722

I Can Tell We Are Gonna Be Friends (hehe Izuku's and Katsuki's fists go brr) https://archiveofourown.org/series/1598899

Oneshots:

Why Phone Calls Should Always Be Private, A Memoir By All Might (pls read it it's way too cracky i highly rec it also there's a second part cmon)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/27138640

Rooftop Dreamer (hurt/comfort)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/16837828

Growing up (growing out) put your roots down (dig them up) (*waters broccoli boi with glitter*)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/26967340

console reset° (*looks distantly* there are things.... that hurt till this day..)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/20696207

ii. explosion (shirakumo??? Dadzawa and twins shinsou and izu? more likely than u think)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/20870834

Fire Hazards°° (aAAAAA ROE WHY DID U HAVE TO MAKE THIS SO ANGSTY-)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/26852737

The Story Of The Stolen Class (*wipes tears with handkerchief*.. wonderful world building)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/26098903

Yuuei Sing And Dance Festival (a 2015 fic thats just pretty crack at this point khvjgc)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/3148019/chapters/6829742

Wraped Reflection (*softly* izuku no-)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/27510142

i have a few more if you'd like :)

ty for reccing these <3

#my asks #daily dose of need more appreciation fic recs

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rebelsandtherest · 3 years

Text

They Love a Good Braid

This is for @draw-a-circle-thats-the-foxhole, who has told me that despite my ace inability to identify flirting in real life, I have managed to write some flirting/romance that is very sappy and cute. I’ve also here borrowed her name for the Netherlands (Jan) as well as the character of Matt’s Samoyed dog, Buddy.

This is also for @ego-meliorem-esse, who helped me visualize what it would look like for Alfred to braid Matt’s hair. :)

Soft Bros, silliness, and flirting ahead!

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FF.Net | Ao3

----------------

It had been a while since Ottawa had hosted a United Nations Summit, and last century Matthew Williams would have been wringing his hands over the itineraries and seating arrangements, but time had taught him there were some things you could never fully prepare for, UN summits being one of them. For the last three months, he'd done all he could do to prepare himself and his government for the influx of foreign visitors and their respective nations, but the time for preparations was past. Last-minute panicking was something he'd endeavored to leave to the humans. All that Matthew had control over now was showing up on time tomorrow morning. Until then, it was enough to slip into a pair of joggers, an old Habs sweatshirt, and rip open a packet of orange gummy edibles while he waited for his fellow nations to arrive.

Well, he wouldn't have to wait on all of them.

"Oh hey, Space Odyssey! What a classic." Matt stopped flipping through channels and glanced up while Alfred stepped clear over the back of the couch and onto the cushions, carrying a Coke Zero in one hand and a box of chinese in the other, chopsticks protruding from one corner. Ignoring the disrespect to his furniture, Matt frowned at the soda. It was nearly nine o'clock.

"A bit late for caffeine, don't you think?" Alfred chuckled.

"I just finished my last slide deck for tomorrow, this is to put me to sleep, man." Matt shook his head. Even knowing Alfred had screwy brain chemistry was not always enough to keep him from questioning his life choices.

"I thought you were on adderall again?"

"Yeah, and it wore off at like, 5, so," Alfred tipped his can and took a slurp. He glanced at the foil packet on the coffee table and nudged Matt's thigh with his foot. "You're one to speak, Mr. Smoke-the-Anxiety-Away."

"I haven't smoked since Spring," Matt grumbled, reaching for his gummies with a foot to nudge them within reach. "The office staff complained about the smell and my dry cleaning bill got too high."

"Gummies are better anyway," Alfred said, rifling through his takeout with the chopsticks. "Ugh, why is there always so much damn broccoli in these things? You want any?" Matt closed his eyes in an exasperated expression he'd absorbed under the tutelage of Arthur Kirkland.

"Please eat your vegetables, Alfred, God knows your arteries will thank you."

"Shut up, I'm eating all of the other vegetables, but broccoli contaminates everything it touches. If you don't want it, I'll give it to the dog." Matt glanced at his Samoyed, Buddy, a melted pool of white fur lying on the floor, black nose twitching with interest towards Alfred's dinner.

"The sauce will make him sick," Matt said. "You're so damn picky. Give it here," he held out his hand, but instead Alfred lifted a piece of broccoli directly to his mouth. He bit it and swatted the chopsticks away. "You're hopeless," he munched.

"I know what I like, so sue me."

They both munched in silence while Keir Dullea navigated the stark black-and-white spaceship amid ethereal string music. Alfred was more accustomed to hosting international summits than his Northern twin, but for whatever reason, Matt had never made a habit of showing up more than a day or two early whenever the UN convened in New York or DC. However, whenever Ottowa was hosting, Alfred travelled up weeks in advance, using the summit as an excuse to visit with Matthew.

He'd arrived two weeks ago, his old Bronco packed to the gills with fresh citrus, old video games, sporting equipment, home-made whiskey, and other eclectic offerings that he thought Matt might have a use for. The first time he'd showed up unannounced back in the 80s, Matthew had exploded on him for making him host company while also planning an impending UN summit. The same afternoon, however, Matt had come home to find his dog walked, his kitchen sink repaired, his fridge restocked, and dinner simmering on the stove.

Loathe though he was to admit it, it was useful having Alfred around sometimes. Even if he never ate enough vegetables.

Matt hadn't meant to settle in to watch Space Odyssey, and it turned out to be an existentially tiring movie to watch while high, but the music and the visuals mixed with Alfred's intermittent commentary of "Did you know that in order to shoot these scenes," this and "the technical execution of this shot is magnificent" that, he found himself melting into an liminal space of bright tv lights and cozy couch cushions. His vision jolted sometime around the beginning of the third act and he realized belatedly that Alfred had left for the kitchen. He returned shortly with a neat (and full) glass of whiskey to replace his soda, and if Matt weren't so high he would've scolded him soundly for mixing uppers and downers, but Alfred's had always responded to substances differently. Alfred laughed at something Matt didn't register himself saying, and offered his brother a small bowl of popcorn, which he did register taking with an appreciative hum.

Matt zoned out for an undetermined amount of time and came back to Earth when the credits were rolling. At some point, he'd navigated himself to sit on the floor, back propped up by Alfred's leg, lap now full of a sleepy, furry dog.

"What do you want to watch?" Alfred asked above him, voice pleasantly tipsy while he clicked through the channels. "Ooh, Star Trek reruns. Want to keep with the space theme?"

"You and your fucken space race. No. Keep going."

"Ugh, fine."

They eventually settled on, of all things, late night reruns of How It's Made. While Alfred slurred out overly enthusiastic explanations of how every machine worked and which ones he'd helped build before, Matt stared at the assembly lines and let them massage his brain through his optic nerve, feeling pleasantly like a noodle. He munched on his second gummy and asked Alfred to put the rest away so Buddy wouldn't get into them.

A sip or two past the halfway point of his whiskey, Alfred entered the cuddly phase of drunk, and began idly playing with Matt's hair. Matt groaned appreciatively and with uncharacteristic eagerness pressed the back of his head toward his brother's hand, knocking hard into his knuckles in the process.

"Ow," Matt complained. Alfred chuckled. The couch behind him shifted and Alfred sipped his whiskey before setting it on the coffee table by Matt's extended leg. Alfred's legs appeared on either side of Matt's shoulders and he poked Matt in the side with a toe.

"Don't elbow me, you menace." Matt didn't answer, too mesmerized by the balloon-making process to make words.

Alfred began combing his hands through Matt's hair, and the heavenly scritch and tug against his scalp was more addictive than the bottle-filling machine on screen. Alfred spoke softly above him, about the show and about his hair and surely about other things, but Matt was absorbed in the bliss of his gummies and the feeling of someone else playing with his hair.

"…haven't seen you in braids in a while," Alfred said, and though Matt knew he must've been speaking already, he hadn't been listening. "You look great like this, why don't you wear them more often?"

"Hmm?" Matt reached up and brushed fingers over his hair, letting out a noise of surprise—higher pitched than he liked—when he felt the thick cords of a braid trailing from his temple. "Oh wow," was all he could think to say. "Didn't know you remembered how to braid. Your hair was always matted so badly, Arthur always told me you must've forgotten how to plait before you'd ever learned."

"Hardy har," Alfred jeered, taking the braid from Matt's finger tips and gently prising it back apart. "You were the one who liked your hair long. I only let mine mat up so they'd let me shave it off. Then all my bosses kept having baby girls and somehow I was babysitter. You know how much celebrity you get in the kindergarten crowd when you know how to do special braids? The Roosevelt girls thought I was hot shit." Matt snorted.

"Mmhmm, 'specially Alice…" he smirked, eyes closed. Alfred kicked him.

"Shut up." Matt elbowed him back. A small war of knees and elbows ensued, but stopped when Alfred leaned over Matt's shoulder to retrieve his whiskey glass.

"What kind of braids you want? I'll show Arthur who forgot how to braid."

"Mmm," Matt hummed, feeling his high tapering off but leaving him at a pleasantly hazy, sleepy place. "Surprise me." This response seemed to take Alfred off guard, and he chuckled as he continued brushing out Matt's blond locks with surprisingly gentle fingers.

"Hmm," the southern twin hummed, more to himself than to his brother, "your beau will be there tomorrow, maybe you ought to impress him."

"Give 'im something to untangle when we get home…" Matt mused.

"First of all, ew," Alfred said, tugging his hair, "second of all, no way I'm making it easy for him." Matt no longer cared what Alfred was saying, happy to surrender to the lullaby of nails on his scalp, tugs on his hair, and the warmth of Alfred's hands repositioning his head as he nodded off.

"You falling asleep on me, bro?" Alfred asked.

"No," Matt said. He woke up a while later to a quiet, dark house and Alfred's broad shoulders under one of his arms.

"I've set your alarm for 5:30, looks like your suit is already set out, Mr. Prepared." Matt realized Alfred had taken him to his bedroom.

"Right," Matt said, falling into bed still in his socks and sweats. "Thanks." Something unfamiliar and firm was pressing into the nape of his neck but he was too tired to investigate. The mattress shifted as his dog leaped up to join him on the bed and he let his eyes drift shut.

"See you in the morning, Mattie."

---------------------

At 5:30 am, Matt's alarm went off and both he and his dog groaned about it. After the human hit snooze a few times, the dog relented to the day with a high-pitched yawn and began nosing Matt in the neck until he, too, was forced awake. It was still dark out, but the Canadian had centuries of experience rising and dressing in the dark.

He pulled on his socks and slacks before the dog insisted on breakfast, which Matt found and distributed in an equally-dark kitchen. He returned to his dark room and fished a freshly pressed shirt out of his dark closet before tying the tie he'd selected last week—in the dark, of course.

And so, when he finally entered the washroom and flipped on the lights, it was a shock to see his own reflection.

"Oh wow," he muttered to the mirror, which of course gave no comment beyond Matt's own stunned expression. Tentatively, he reached up and touched his styled hair, which was astonishingly clean and flat despite the fact that he'd just woken up. He stood back and surveyed it again, turning this way and that to see it from the side, feeling up the nape to see what his brother had accomplished while whiskey-drunk and watching manufacturing process videos.

"Damn, Alfred," Matt muttered quietly to the air, mouth falling slightly open as he traced the eerily-perfect braids. The grain of his hair was pulled back into a tidy bun he'd begun sporting occasionally in the last decade or so, but he'd never styled it like this, with two small dutch braids coming up from the nape of his neck and one large French braid woven all down his crown. It was immaculately done. Lacking glasses, Matt leaned right up to the mirror to admire the details, having to press down errant strands only here and there in places where his pillow should've rubbed the plaits raw. Still, they held their shape.

"Well shit," Matt muttered. "No wonder Alice wanted you to fuck her."

"Yo Mattie!" Alfred's voice called from elsewhere in the house. "You still sleepin' in there, or are you just getting dressed in the dark again?"

"I'll be out in a minute," Matt said, casting a last look at his reflection before he continued straightening his tie and tucking his shirttails. "Don't drink my coffee!"

When Matt emerged from his room, the lights had been turned on and there was a pair of clean coffee mugs waiting beside the percolator burbling on the stove, but Alfred was nowhere to be found. Matt had only just got the waffle batter into the iron when the front door opened and Alfred came inside, a panting and happy samoyed smiling beside him. Of course Alfred would go for a run at 6am before an international summit.

"Aha!" Alfred beamed even as he bent over to let Buddy off his leash. The dog shook himself and went to go sniff Matt's pant legs. "So you liked the braids, huh?" Matt glared at his brother before turning back to the waffle iron, adjusting the gas range underneath before carefully flipping it over.

"Don't let it get to your head," he grumbled, and Alfred continued to smile, unfazed. "I didn't have time to redo it." Alfred said nothing, happily busying himself with plates, flatware, and fetching the syrup. They danced around each other in companionable silence to prepare breakfast, and neither said a word until they were sat across from each other at the table and Matt was waiting for him to finish drenching his waffles in syrup. "French and Dutch," he said, and shook his head when Alfred looked up. "A little on the nose, don't you think?"

Alfred grinned, dimples shaping his face in that mischievous way that made some nations nervous but made Matt's stomach warm with thoughts of home.

"You're welcome," Alfred said, pleased with himself. Matt frowned at him.

"Alfred, you don't need an entire maple tree for two waffles."

"I know what I'm about, Canuck," Alfred paid him no mind, eyes on the stream of syrup onto his plate. Matt looked alternately between the waffles and his brother. Eventually, he said,

"Seriously, Alfred, that stuff isn't cheap, could you please—"

"Cheaper than it is in my place!," Alfred smacked Matt's hand when he tried to reach across the table to the glass carafe. "You have a whole personal forest of this shit back in Quebec, don't think I don't know about that—"

"Oh my god you're going to make yourself sick,"

"And if I do, it will have been worth it!"

"I'm never making you waffles again."

"I'm never braiding your hair again!"

"Jesus you're such a child, give it here—"

"I wasn't done!"

Miraculously, Alfred had managed to budget enough time in their morning to complete a full course of bickering and still have enough time to brush their teeth, clean up breakfast, tidy each others' ties, and set up Buddy in the backyard before their scheduled government car arrived.

"I hate to disappoint you,"Matthew muttered to Alfred when they were seated side by side in the back, "but your offer of a 1985 Ford Bronco chauffeur service didn't quite meet the expectations from Rideau Hall." Alfred only scoffed.

"Their loss," he said.

They arrived early, and only the greenest of Canadian officials were surprised to see Alfred strolling in on his brother's heels, nearly an hour earlier than his American compatriots. One intern visibly blanched upon seeing the USA flag pin on Alfred's lapel, and when he glanced at her paper badge, he realized she was one of the ones who'd been tasked with helping the Americans navigate the conference spaces.

"Don't worry about it," he gave her a wink, "I cause enough trouble they make this guy boss me around himself," he jutted a thumb at Matt, who Alfred was not entirely sure she would've known personally. Matt noticed him and called him over.

"Stop scaring the interns," he hissed. "The president is supposed to be arriving in fifteen. Don't you have places to be?"

"Yes, mom," Alfred rolled his eyes. He strolled back by the intern, who was not so pale now, but still flustered. He smiled and tipped his chin at her. "Nice braid," he said, prompting her to run a self-conscious hand over her hair. "Dutch, right?" She blushed.

"The President, Alfred," Matt reminded.

"Yeah, yeah."

---------------------

Not a soul had commented on Matt's hair all morning, and Alfred was beginning to feel offended. As the other nations began arriving with their entourages, Alfred floated closeby to eavesdrop in the hopes that someone would notice his handiwork. Arthur was first to comment, but it was a quick and ambiguous,

"Ah, there you are, my boy, I hardly recognized you with your hair pulled back like that. It's a clean look. How've you been?" Clean was not exactly the kind of compliment Alfred had been hoping for from the man who'd said he couldn't braid, so he continued eavesdropping in the hopes of juicer feedback.

Jan had been next to comment, but Alfred had no idea what the Dutchman thought of Alfred's braidwork, partially because Alfred's Dutch comprehension was rusty at best, and partially because whatever Jan had said had made Matt get that look on his face that made Alfred want to gag, so he'd turned away in a hurry. Sure, he liked Jan, and yeah, he was glad that Jan and Matt had found each other, but seriously? In front of allies?

"Shall I give you a strand of pearls so you might clutch them?" Asked an accented voice, and Alfred looked over to see Francis approaching, daintily holding a cup of conference room coffee in one hand.

"He's my brother," Alfred said, "I'm allowed." Francis laughed and reached out his free hand to place it on Alfred's shoulder. The American endured la bise with practiced indifference but must've looked grumpy when Francis pulled away.

"Puritanism has never been a fashionable look, mon cher, not even when you were young." He glanced past Alfred to where Matthew was being inundated with fresh arrivals, moving on from his beloved Jan to Emma, Antonio, and the Nordics, who seemed to have arrived together. "Oh my, speaking of fashion… I have not seen Matthieu in braids since he was a child. Who knew he could elevate the style so much as a grown man?" The older nation hummed thoughtfully. "I wonder what prompted him."

"Me, actually," Alfred allowed himself to puff out his chest slightly. "I braided it for him last night." Unexpectedly, this made Francis laugh, suddenly and loudly. He quieted himself in short order, but the smile remained on his lips.

"Oh, I've missed you and your sense of humor, mon ami," Francis gave Alfred's chest a pat and began to move past him. "I'll have to pry Matthew for his stylist's name."

"But I-"

"We will meet for lunch before I go, yes?"

"Okay but I really did-"

"Angleterre," Francis called ahead, "tu marches trop vite, wait a moment."

Alfred's shoulders slumped, mouth hanging open in affronted silence while Francis teased Arthur in French down the hall.

---------------------

No one else mentioned Matt's braids for the rest of the day, and Alfred sulked about it at every available opportunity between conference sessions, so much so that Matt himself came to ask him what was wrong.

"Nothing," Alfred insisted. "You're doing a great job, by the way." Unexpectedly, Matt actually flushed at such praise, shoulders relaxing minutely. Alfred forgot how tightly wound Matt could become around these events. "Sorry if I made you worry."

And so, for the sake of his brother's nerves, Alfred was willing to take his wounded pride and bottle it up for future indulgence where it wouldn't upset the conduct of international affairs. Still, when he spotted Francis gossiping with Ludwig and Lux from across the hall, he couldn't help but squint his eyes, wondering if they were talking about his "sense of humor."

That night, after Matt quietly left the nations-only dinner with Jan's hand down his back pocket, Alfred let his wounded ego out for a breather at the hotel bar, where he grumbled about their whiskey selection under his breath and began squinting at the vodka options.

"The drafts here are surprisingly good, if you're having trouble," crowed a feminine voice, and Alfred turned in his stool to find a cute, buxom blonde licking beer foam off her red lipstick. He watched the movement before meeting her eyes; the left one had a dark freckle interrupting the green, and he'd always found it enchanting.

"High praise coming from you, O Mistress of the Brauhaus," he smiled at her, and Emma made a show of preening under such praise. He chuckled. "Whatcha drinking?"

"I can't remember what it's called," she admitted, and pointed at a colorful tap pull down the bar. "That one in the middle, there."

"Oh?" He leaned into her space, grinning goofily as she hopped up to the barstool next to him. "That's one of mine, you know."

"Oh ho," Emma watched the bubbles in her beer before looking playfully over at him. "Tastes like you've been copying someone's homework, Mr. Jones." He grinned, dimples playful.

"I learn from the best." She held his gaze for an intense moment, and asked:

"So whose homework did you copy to make those stunning braids?" She teased. "I didn't know Matthew had a sister hiding about."

"Oh, come on," Alfred moaned, flirtatious efforts shattering as Emma dissolved into laughter. "Who told you?"

"Francis has been gossiping about it all day," she told him, still giggling, cheeks rosy with alcohol and humor. "Saying you're trying to take credit for a masterpiece when you yourself were a… how did he put it? Enfant sauvage? Who… I really can't say it like him. Who "would've have only learned to braid if it were taught in the Navy, and he grows so sick at sea he surely never stayed long enough to find out,"" Emma could barely get through the quote before giggling some more, wiping at her eyes while Alfred glared into space.

"I can't believe him," Alfred complained, watching the bartender deposit a pint on his coaster. He dragged it closer to himself with a sigh.

"Oh, don't pout, mon râleur," Emma put a hand on his arm, "it's un peu drôle."

"It's not funny," Alfred insisted, taking a sip of his beer and having to suck the foam off his lip—he missed how Emma watched him do it—"I'm not that hopeless."

"You're really upset about this, aren't you?"

"I take credit for something I did, and get called a liar? Yeah, I'm a little pissed about it." He sucked back several large gulps while Emma watched him with new skepticism.

"You know, I really can't tell if you're bluffing or not," she said.

"I'm not," he insisted.

"Hmm," Emma sat up a little straighter in her seat, and ran a hand through her shoulder-short strawberry blonde hair. "Alright, then, prove it."

"What?"

"Braid my hair."

"Oh, come on, you can't just take me at my word?"

"You know better than I the exchange rate for that kind of currency is tanking, Mr. Jones," she teased, and shook her head to make her hair fan out toward him. "Go on." He glared at her.

"And what do I get if I can prove I'm not lying?" He asked.

"Hmm," she glanced back over at the taps. "Another pint." He met her eyes and raised an eyebrow.

"Fine," He said, and downed half his pint before perching on the edge of his barstool and setting to work. She watched him work out of the corner of her eye as he wove a small, clean braid down the side of her temple, arching over the curve of her ear in a tasteful line. She threw her head back to finish off her beer, but he continued to work, undeterred. When he was finished, he had no tie to secure it, so he gently tucked the end at the base of her ear and gave it a stroke with his finger to put it in place.

"Done," he said, and crossed his arms in a self-righteous way. Emma sat up and took out her phone, using the front camera to inspect his handiwork.

"Well?" He asked. She put down her phone and sighed. She nodded her chin to get the bartender's attention. "He'll have another pint on me," she said.

"Ha!" Alfred beamed, and downed the remainder of his first pint before sliding the glass aside to make room.

"And you, ma'am?" Asked the bartender, fetching two glasses.

"Hmm," Alfred wasn't paying attention while Emma side-eyed him, and was taken completely off guard when she grabbed his face in one hand and pulled him down for a wet kiss. After a few seconds she pulled away, still holding his bewildered face in a hand, and tasted her own lips. "What is it that he just had?" she asked.

"That was the New England IPA, ma'am," said the bartender, audibly trying not to laugh.

"I'll have a pint of that, then," she finally let him go but he stayed right where she'd left him, wide-eyed and pink. She leaned forward, nose almost touching his.

"Color me surprised, he can braid," she said. "But I bet you can't do a proper French plait."

"Hmm," a smile grew on Alfred's face, a bashful shade of confidence that Emma had been chasing for years. "And… what, exactly do I get if I prove you wrong?" The bartender came by with their pints.

"Last call is in five minutes, folks, can I get you anything else?" he asked.

"No, thank you," Emma answered for them both. Alfred frowned at her, but she only smiled at him, eyes playful. "I have an early morning tomorrow," she said, and handed him his pint. "But I'm sure I can think of something if you prove me wrong tonight." His eyebrows shot skyward, but she didn't drop eye contact as she sipped her IPA. He bit his lip in an effort not to laugh even as his face blushed bright.

"Alright," he smiled. When he grabbed her pint and set it aside, she let him. "Turn around, then," he said, and she giggled when he swiveled her around by her knee. His hands buried in her hair. "Saying I can't braid," he teased, smile audible in his voice. "honestly, the nerve." Emma chuckled, swinging her legs as he worked.

"Don't waste time, then, I've got plenty else I plan to say about you before the night is over."

---------------------

The following morning, as the crowds returned for day two of the summit, Matt arrived with barely-noticeable dark circles under his eyes and heavenly blonde waves that framed his face in patterns made by plaits that had been lovingly untangled the night before.

"Alfred," he found his brother at breakfast, startling the American to attention just as he bit into a bagel. "Where have you been? I was worried, you didn't come home last night."

"Go home?" Alfred asked around a mouthful, pausing to swallow. "And listen to you and Jan reunite all night? Absolutely not."

"Okay," Matt rolled eyes eyes, "we are not that ba-"

"Yes you are," Alfred pointed the remainder of his bagel up at his twin. "You know you are. I swung by this morning for my suit, your fucking tie was on a rafter. I'm just glad I didn't get an eyeful of you two. Honestly." Matt sighed and plopped down in the chair next to him, cheeks pink.

"Did you at least find some place to sleep?" he asked, sounding a little guilty.

"Yeah, not like there's any shortage of couches to surf on here. Sides, the bartender felt bad for me and gave me a pint on the house."

"He what? Oh my God, Al, you could've just asked, they would've given you a room, you don't have to go complaining about me to everyone who-"

"Mattie, I'm joking."

"...oh."

"Don't worry about me, seriously. I was fine." He sipped his coffee, and handed Matt a piece of bacon, which his brother took and munched without comment. "Though if it's all the same to you, I might swing by and get my suitcase at lunch today. You know. Just. relocate for a few days while Jan is in town."

"That's… probably for the best."

"Yeah."

They chewed in silence as more people filtered into the breakfast hall.

"Oh wow, Emma looks great today," Matt commented. Alfred looked up and nearly choked on his coffee when he saw that she was still wearing the proper French plait he'd given her the night before—it must've taken her an hour just to clean up from how he'd last seen it. He blushed furiously behind his mug.

Clueless, Matt continued, "I'm not sure I've ever seen her wear a braid. It suits her."

"Sure does," Alfred said, sipping quietly. "Apparently all those Europeans are suckers for a good braid."

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theyscreamjade · 3 years

Note

I saw the Call Out My Name imagine and I thought if you could do a Headcanon for Todoroki, Bakugo, Midoriya, Kirishima & Iida of a new student that has an "angel" quirk (the angel wings, a beautiful voice and obviously a beautiful personality). Like their quirk would be their voice; singing can be hypnotic and yeah it says it all.

I kinda got the idea from the song from Ariana Grande- Raindrops!!

Angel

I love Ariana so much, I listened to this a thousand times because I loved it so much but I honestly love her dedication to pete on there. Another note, I made them seniors in high school, I hope you enjoy.

Quirk: Angel ( They have wings of an Angel, a voice of one and a mind like one.)

_________________________

Izuku Midoriya

* When you two first met, it was an accident in all honesty. He was so lost in his thoughts about something a villain said to him that he didn’t even notice you standing behind him. Then he finally realized that he was standing in line at a café.

* He quickly turned to you and apologized profusely but you smiled and waved him off.

* Almost immediately he noticed how beautiful your wings were, they sparkled in the bright lights of the cafe. Even after he walked away, he couldn’t get you from his mind.

* Broccoli was curious about you, the small senior sat at his desk for a minute until he saw you walk in. Your soft smile on your face just made him nearly jump from his seat. He’s taking notes immediately after you show your quirk off too.

* He loves seeing Eri with you, you and she was often walking around the school and she’s following you like a baby duckling.

* It’ll take a minute for you two to date, the way he confesses was rather hilarious, to say the least.

* You, Deku, Denki, Iida, Jirou, and lastly Tsu were simply playing around with some musical equipment leftover from the festival. You’ve shown how your quirk worked before and how it affects others but half the time, no one could hear except for the person being hypnotized.

* Jirou insisted you sing a bit into the mic when you did. Everyone stared in astonishment. “I love you..” Midoriya soon confessed unknowingly which made you drop the mic, breaking the trance.

* He can’t help but protect you.

* He calls you his guardian angel or his angel often.

* He loves to hear your voice while his head is on your lap, your hand running through his hair. It eases all the anxieties of work that he’s dealt with.

* You can’t deny that you and his personality are so flipping innocent that it made me spell flipping.

* THATS HOW INNOCENT IT IS!

* He loves you with every part of his heart.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Shoto Todoroki

* He was infatuated with you a few weeks after you were enrolled. It wasn’t your voice or wings, but your personality.

* You ignored Denki and Mineta’s perverted ways, you always calmed Midoriya down from his thoughts, and you somehow made Bakugo yell less and boosted Kirishima’s confidence.

* Is there anything you can’t do?

* He discovered how amazing your voice was in the middle of the night, you sat alone, staring out the window late at night. You were homesick and the urge to fly home was on your heart. There, you sang your feelings out to yourself..or so you thought.

* The next day, you were surprised to discover an item from your hometown on your desk. It was a simple keychain but it bright back memories of your home.

* “I listened to you last night...I hope you enjoy it.” Shoto said with a smile but was shocked when you hugged him. Let’s say a relationship blossomed after that.

* I honestly see him love your wings. Each feather on them is a simple detail of the beautiful masterpiece that you are.

* You’d fly so gracefully in the air as if you were meant for the clouds.

* If you wanted him to fly with you, it’ll take a minute for him to get used to it. It’ll be quite a sight to see.

* His nickname for you would be baby, baby girl or boy, or Angel.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Katsuki Bakugo

* You two met a few hours after you walked in. How you may ask?

* He was your practice dummy. He was the first to step in when Aizawa wanted to see your quirk and when you sang to him, instantly hypnotizing him to sit down. It was shocking for everyone.

* When he was freed, he wasn’t happy for being humiliated, but he gained respect for you. People will never understand how you became apart of the Baku-Squad but you did.

* You were the sweet one out of the bunch of sour apples.

* His feelings never developed until the near end of the school year. You always tended to his wounds, calmed him down, and listened to him.

* He confessed to you the day before graduation and you two soon started dating.

* He loves flying beside you during battles with his quirk, soaring with you through the sky and you were always ready to swoop him up if he couldn’t stay in the air long.

* He never wanted to hear your voice until you and he was fully alone. I mean fully because he can finally be venerable with you. These demons still haunt him even though he hates to admit it.

* You’ll sing him a song of his choice while you two sat facing away from each other, staring at the opposite walls while his hand was in yours.

* Your personality just made him want to protect you more. He fears that many will take full advantage of your kind, sweet traits that many wish they had.

* His nickname for you would be Faith. (No explanation needed.)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tenya Iida

* Mister choppy here, knew just how great you were from the start. He respected you too much to ever pursue a relationship though.

* He simply kept being your friend and was always there to help. If there was ever a time you were falling from the sky, he was always there to catch you.

* If you were ever injured, he’d do his best to get you to safety and protect you at all costs. Which is what he did one time and when you woke up to find yourself with recovery girl. You knew Iida took you here.

* You would have to confess to him, how?

* You sing him a love song after school and you confess your feelings to him where he does the same.

* You two in a relationship are the most beautiful blessing to ever touch the surface of the earth.

* You two are the reason most relations stay together. Even the elderly are asking if you two would ever get married.

* He’d often ask you to sing before bed, you were his lullaby. He’d hold you close as you swooned to a beautiful bliss just waiting to look at your peaceful face in the morning.

* I see him enhancing his power move with you into a flying super kick or something, just know it’ll do a significant amount of damage.

* Your personality was beautiful to him from the get-go. His brother adored your personality and caring nature, you made him smile for the first time in years. You made his paralyzation seem meaningless.

* That right there, was what made Iida wonder about marriage with you.

238 notes · View notes

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