#'what if they're having a bad time too'

[luxaofhesperides]

Ghostlights cuddling for comfort, but also they're oblivious idiots who are pining over each other but thinks its unrequited

“Ugh,” Duke says, dropping down onto the bench besides Danny.

Danny nudges him with his shoulder. “Rough night?”

“Slept for like an hour,” Duke mutters, “This sucks. My head’s going to burst like balloon and my eyes are about to fall out.”

“Yikes. You know, you could have just canceled for today. I wouldn’t have minded.”

Duke sighs and presses the heel of his palms against his eyes. “Maybe, but I would have minded. We barely see each other anymore, man. I’ve missed you.”

“Oh.” Danny bites his lip, trying and failing to stop from smiling. Something soft in his chest glows at the words, a growing spark of happiness in knowing that for this, at least, the feeling is requited. It’s nice to hear that he was missed, and it would be even nicer if Duke wasn’t in pain, pushing himself just because he didn’t want to cancel. Carefully, Danny reaches for him and pulls his hands away from his face. “Here,” he says, “Let me.”

His hands are always cold. Most of him is cold, really — side effect of having an ice core. Sam told him once that his hands were better than an ice pack, and he’s hoping she’s right or this is going to be weird. 

Danny gently presses his fingers against Duke’s temples, his hands cradling Duke’s face. Duke is tense for a few seconds, then abruptly relaxes, leaning into Danny’s hands. 

“Is this helping?” he asks, voice hushed to keep from aggravating Duke’s migraine.

“Mhm. Yeah, it feels great. Thanks, Danny.”

Duke goes completely limp, leaning against Danny. They sit there for a minute in silence, the rest of the world feeling far away. As nice as it is to just exist together, he knows what Duke needs most right now is quiet and stillness. Gotham is very much not that, and every honking car that passes by makes Duke wince, trying to turn away from the road even more.

“Hey, let’s head back to my place. It’s close by, and a lot quieter than out here.”

“Are you sure? I know we planned to go to the arcade today…”

“The arcade can wait. You’re more important.”

Duke blinks open his eyes and looks at Danny with something soft in his gaze. Being so close together, barely any space between them, with Duke looking at him like that makes Danny’s cheeks flush red, unable to think anything but please kiss me.

Which is never going to happen. Duke is his friend, and just his friend, no matter how much Danny wishes they could be something more. It’s a pipe dream, something so impossible it’s almost laughable. 

Duke likes being friends with normal human Danny. He doesn’t want to imagine how he would react if he found out about Danny being half ghost, assuming this imaginary reveal happens without Danny being hunted down and cut open by GIW agents. 

He’s still in hiding, always waiting for the worst as he stays in the apartment his friends (living and dead) had set up for him. The building is for ghosts so it technically doesn’t exists, which means it’s the safest place for Danny while he’s actively being hunted by the US government. 

He can’t be honest with Duke. Can’t be as close to him as he wants to be. Duke deserves more than to be dragged into Danny’s problems and put in danger.

Even so, Danny can’t help but want him around, pushing his luck each time they hang out.

“Come on,” Danny urges, standing up. He pulls his hands away and Duke’s brow immediately furrows, his pain returning. “It’s only a few streets away.”

Duke sighs, then visibly braces himself before he stands up. Danny tucks himself into Duke’s side, taking as much of his weight as he can as he walks them down the street. It’s times like these that he wishes he could reveal his powers safely and just fly them to his apartment. But even without the GIW gunning for his head, showing off powers in Gotham is a sure fire way to get a target painted on his back.

“Almost there,” he says as they turn a corner. 

His apartment doesn’t have a fixed address. It doesn’t have a fixed location at all, drifting around, but it likes this street the most, so this is where it usually is. Danny takes them halfway down the street, then turns into an alley, following his ghost sense. 

Where there’s usually a dead end is instead a building, looking as if it’s always been tucked away in this alley. Danny keeps a tight grip on Duke as they climb the front steps, silently asking for the building to let him stay while he’s with Danny. The door opens easily, which is as good as an agreement, and they’re inside without anything going wrong. The small entrance lobby is empty, with an area for packages filled with clearly magical artifacts carelessly wrapped in bubble wrap. 

Danny drags them past that quickly, hoping Duke doesn’t notice, and calls the elevator down. It arrives silently, the doors opening to let another tenant out. Carefully, Danny positions himself in front of Duke, making sure he doesn’t see how the tenant, who nods at Danny, has a still bleeding wound in his stomach that has him nearly split in half. 

“Alright,” he says, ushering Duke into the elevator, “Just a little ride up and then you can lay down.” He hits the button for the fourth floor and they ride up in silence, Duke dropping his head down to onto Danny’s shoulder again, wrapping his arms around his waist as he stands behind Danny. He’s glad Duke can’t see his face; there’s no doubt that he’s blushing like crazy and if that doesn’t give away his feelings, he doesn’t know what will.

Thankfully the elevator ride isn’t long. If Danny had to go for more than a minute with Duke breathing softly against his neck, his warm hands on his stomach, Danny would have collapsed into a pile of flustered goo.

He opens the door to his apartment and kicks his shoes off. Duke follows in suit, still plastered onto Danny’s back, refusing to let go. 

“Come on,” Danny says, leading him to the couch, “Sit down and I’ll grad you some water and painkillers.”

Duke nods against his shoulder, then slowly detaches himself from Danny and makes his way to the couch. He drops onto it gracelessly, pressing his face into a cushion. 

Danny winces. He must be feeling really bad. He knows how bad migraines can be with sleep deprivation, having suffered through high school with only a few hours of sleep at night, if he got to sleep at all. Frankly, it’s a testament to Duke’s strength that he lasted the entire walk to Danny’s apartment without complaint. 

He returns to the living room with a full glass of water and a bottle of Advil, setting them on the coffee table to crouch next to the couch and place a cold hand on Duke’s cheek. “Hey,” he says softly when Duke turns to look at him, “Is Advil alright? It’s all I had.”

“Yeah, that’s fine. Thanks, Danny.”

Duke sits up and shakes out three pills, then washes them down with water. He drains the rest of the cup quickly, then falls back against the couch with his eyes squeezed shut.

“Is there anything else I can do to make you feel better?”

Duke immediately reaches a hand out for him.

“Um?”

“Sit next to me. I feel better when I’m next to you.”

“Oh! Alright. Bet you’re only saying that because my hands are cold.”

“You caught me,” Duke laughs, pulling Danny onto the couch. He goes easily, tucking his legs beneath himself, and places his hands on Duke’s temples again. “Man, I owe you my life.”

“I don’t think my cold hands are worth quite that much.”

Duke hums, but doesn’t say anything else, so Danny settles in and focuses on keeping his hands a little colder than normal. 

The apartment is quiet. No sound from outside can reach them, one of the few ways the building looks after its tenants. Danny and Duke fall against each other, at ease with each other. There’s no need to fill in the silence, and with Duke’s eyes closed, Danny doesn’t have to carefully shove down his feelings and act normal. He indulges in the warmth of Duke’s body pressed against his, a hand on his knee and an arm around his waist. 

He keeps his hands as steady as possible as he looks over Duke, adoring all the little details he can see; a small scar on his chin, the fullness of his lips, the way his hair falls into his face now that it’s long enough to keep in braids.

“I can practically hear you thinking,” Duke murmurs, “What’s on your mind?”

You’re cute, he thinks, I feel safe with you. I want to kiss you. I wish I could be brave enough to be honest.

I wish I was brave. I wish I was brave. I wish I was brave.

“Nothing,” he says. “Feeling better?”

“Yeah. I might fall asleep though.”

“That’s fine. You know I would never say no to a nap.”

“Come here, then,” Duke says, and before Danny can do anything, Duke gets a stronger grip on his waist and pulls Danny down on top of him as he falls back towards the arm rest and gets his legs on the couch.

“Duke!”

Duke laughs underneath him, and Danny can feel it roll through him. Okay! This is definitely something he’s going to think about… forever. Wow, he can feel Duke’s abs tense up as he laughs, and has he always been ripped? Unfair. Also unfairly hot. 

“Is this alright?” Duke asks, voice soft and quiet. There’s a hesitancy around his words that Danny doesn’t like hearing, and he brings his hands down to sweep his thumbs soothingly over Duke’s cheeks.

“Of course it is, man. I’d never refuse cuddles.”

“Okay. I’m gonna pass out now. Wake me in an hour?”

Danny moves his hands back up to his temples and says, “Sure. Get some rest, Duke. You really need it.”

He feels Duke relax beneath him, breaths slowing down as he begins to fall asleep. It’s peaceful and quiet and Duke is warm in a way Danny never can be with his ice core. He doesn’t mean to fall asleep, but curled up on the couch with Duke in the safety of an apartment that only barely exists has him drifting off in no time at all.

. . .

(Duke wakes up before Danny. Their legs are tangled together and Duke has moved during his sleep, turning so Danny is held tightly to his chest, his back to the cushions, while Duke is balancing very carefully at the edge of the couch. 

It’s been hours, and he should be heading home soon, but he stays as he is, enjoying this quiet moment for as long as he can have it. Danny is in his arms, safe and content with him, his head no longer hurts beyond a residual ache he can easily ignore, and he can admire how pretty Danny is without being worried about Danny catching his lingering stares. 

These moments are precious to him, rare as they are, and he wants nothing more than to kiss Danny once he’s awake and let his feelings be known.

But the Signal has lots of dangerous people after him, and Gnomon has started causing problems in Gotham again. So he’ll bite his tongue and keep his less platonic feelings buried under lock and key until it’s safe enough for Danny to be around him more often.

And when that time comes, he can only hope that Danny will feel the same way.

That’s all far away from the stillness of Danny’s apartment. All that matters is that he has Danny in his arms. Everything else can wait. 

For now, this is more than enough.)

#ghostlights #dc x dp #dp x dc #dcxdp #dpxdc #dc x dp fic #dpxdc fanfic #prompt fill #my writing #once again unable to resist the urge to write abt living buildings #duke and danny are pining no stop bc they're both like 'this is a bad time for a relationship/i have to keep too many secrets' etc etc #while also cuddling and going on dates that they dont call dates out loud and sighing wistfully when they think of each other #taking what small things they can while trying to hide their feelings.... #some other batfam member is going to stumble upon them in public and chat a bit w dukes friend #then walk away texting the group chat like 'hey duke and his friend are madly in love but too shy/stupid to do something abt it. #lets play cupid lol' and then theyre all trying to get duke and danny together #it gets to the point that every time they hang out it ends with them doing some nonsense to escape the batfam and their kind but unhinged #attempts to get them together #thanks for the prompt!!!

[thepringlesofblood]

anyone else having to go through fhjy at a snail's pace bc every time there's a teacher-student interaction (even the positive ones!) you want to set something on fire because of how much you hate high school and american academic culture and it throws you back to the Bad Old Days of actually being in high school, but also you really like fantasy high and you really like the characters and their story and the players and the way they're exploring & critiquing the US school system and basically everything about the show but actually watching it makes your brain explode?

#dimension 20 #d20 #fhjy #fantasy high junior year #original post #look every time porter comes on screen i lowkey have a rage blackout #my hyperempathetic ass needs to watch recaps or read the transcripts or something #its too goddamn much #bc fantasy high has never actually been about like. the academics #but now that it is and now that aguefort is functioning more as a prestigious private school than as a lawless wasteland #its actually bringing back memories of me being in high school. the bad ones. #so its like. it turns out that the thing i liked about fantasy high was that it wasn't actually high school as i remember it #look i think what they're doing this season is genius #brennan is the perfect person to tackle this kind of topic #and each character has a different struggle that is both unique and yet resonates with the real world #and academic trauma is incredibly underdiscussed and i love that d20 has the guts to address it #i just need to take 3-5 business days to process every like. hour of content #so. we'll see how long it takes me to finish it

[goobygnarp]

.

#good grief im gettin a lil tired of seeing 'DONT DO THIS' kinda art videos #i very much understand its a youtube thing and that clickbait names and thumbs get the views and attention needed #but it doesnt mean it doesnt annoy me or that I cant be annoyed by it #sometimes i just see it in tutorial pictures too #but the large DONTS with red Xs near the supposed ''wrong'' way of drawing is so demotivating #people start and draw in many ways than one #its what makes art their own #but when videos or tutorial posts are made and show the ''WRONG'' way to go about it #its like scolding the new artist or long time artist with that style that they're doing it wrong and that its bad #no matter the intention its not the way to go about helping artists learn to draw #and in my personal opinion #the click bait ''DONT DO THIS WHEN DRAWING'' thing is what keeps me from actually watching the vids #i get theyre probably helpful but i don't like that I have to feel some NEED or DESIRE to click on a vid cause I feel like I did a thing #wrong or that i never should have done it at all #i wish i could see more 'here are some tips that helped me #kinda vids cause yes i would love to learn what helped you rather than being or feeling wronged for drawing in a way that isn't theirs #im rambling but i have been seeing a lot of 'DONT DO THIS' NEVER DO THIS' 'IF YOURE DOING THIS STOP NOW' kinda art vids #im speakin for myself here #but im an artist sifting through art youtube or spaces always willing to learn new ways of improving my art #i dont need to feel click baited like the next 3am don't this kid to learn how to improve my inking skills #if it was more a 'this is my personal preference and I wanna share it with my audience and maybe teach some things' kinda vid #id watch that too #but im just so tired of seeing art youtube going down this need to tell folks 'YOURE DOING IT ALL WRONG. THIS IS THE RIGHT WAY"

[essektheylyss]

I have seen the newest fhjy Aelwyn Abernant gifset multiple times in the last week and I had planned to watch it eventually but like...... is that really what's gonna get me into this series. Is that really what it takes. What the fuck level of targeted advertising is THIS.

#you come to me. two weeks before the 5 year anniversary of cr 2x57 in love and war. #and you tell me the elven eldest child with villain decay is now a CAT PERSON? #what the fuck am i supposed to do with this. #to be clear there are specific major plots that I'm interested in. this is not like. just for this reason. #i just haven't gotten around to it and i am feeling very called out for my tastes. #also don't fucking @ me about knowing the date of 57 offhand okay it's actually cuz of quarantine/2020 essek prompt week lmao #but fr as a person who's gonna have to sit my sister down and go 'it's really hurtful that you assume bad intentions of me all the time' #the abernant sisters are in fact like. ouch. #i didn't even mention cuz it feels too obvious but THEY'RE EVEN WIZARDS. good lord. attacked.

[hella1975]

all hate to tiktok for taking 'having a space to more openly and actively talk about different cultures' to mean 'cultures are NOT to be shared and we must be vigilantly defensive of our cultures for fear of appropriation, a word that can be applied to any multicultural interaction'. like of course cultural appropriation is a very real problem but ive seen with the access to global multicultural conversation that tiktok provides it's made people TERRIFIED to even interact with cultures other than their own for fear of 'doing it wrong'. like at some point you have to acknowledge that in the real world of the great outdoors, the majority of people are eager to SHARE their cultures. yes there are ignorant questions and biases but also... how do you think those things get unlearnt? i dont understand how deciding that multiculturalism is an elephant in the room instead of a normal thing that should just be talked about and lived with is supposed to benefit anyone? and kids on tiktok are CONVINCED that it's a time bomb of a conversation to have and therefore must be avoided at all costs but like. people generally LOVE their home and their culture and are PROUD of it and want to share it. how have we made it so that showing genuine interest and a desire to understand something so integral to a person's identity is now feared and borderline demonised?

#thinking about this a lot lately. thinking about how fun it was comparing cultural differences in america #thinking of how when i was homesick one thing i found a great comfort in was talking about my home #and how it differed and i really loved and appreciated it when people would ask me about england #in a way that they genuinely just wanted to learn about it and not to take the piss #thinking about how the kitchen at work has chefs from all over europe. we have an irish chef and a spanish chef and an italian chef #and one of the kps is from eastern europe (i havent actually been able to find out where yet) etc and the way they banter with each other #like usually chefs are Problematic bc their humour is VERY abrasive and usually offensive #but this is one instance where it's actually to their benefit bc they're so unafraid to ADDRESS THE FACT THEY HAVE DIFFERENT CULTURES #i feel like the tiktok gen are so petrified of even acknowledging other cultures let alone discussing them #that it's actually sending the conversation backwards. like how does hoarding your culture and pretending it's not there benefit anyone #LET ALONE YOU AND THE CULTURE IN QUESTION. idk it just baffles me a bit that something that started as people on tiktok #genuinely spreading information and talking about the BAD side of this where people DO culturally appropriate or invade spaces that arent #theirs has now become 'for fear of speaking bad about it we will not speak about it at all'. and they'll crucify you if you do. like what #even at uni my best mate is indian and she's too scared to join the sikh society on her own so i regularly go to the events with her #and im typically one of the handful (or the only) white non-sikh there and i get SO welcomed each time #like there's such a genuine excitement to share the culture with someone who is effectively a blank slate #and like yeah ill ask 'dumb' questions or i'll have different experiences (tried a samosa for the first time at one of these events #and the moment that info got out i had like five STRANGERS trying to give me different samosas to try and it was genuinely such #a laugh bc yes they were TEASING me bc 'how have you never had one' but they were also really eager to share MORE as a result) #ugh idk what im saying. i just think it's a shame to watch this happen in real time on the internet #when if people would just go outside and actually TALK to people from other cultures they'd realise 9 times out of 10 the interactions #are actually really really nice for BOTH parties. and actually refusing to talk about this stuff is long-term pretty fucking detrimental #and it also goes the other way!!! like imagine if i - citizen of colonisation motherland herself - didn't interact with other cultures #and didnt ask questions or hear their opinions on whatever shared history we have from THEIR POINT OF VIEW #imagine the kind of shit id be internalising bc i only hung out with other white british people. it wouldnt matter if i was doing it #to be woke or 'respect their culture'. it would still be fucking ignorant. like half my interactions with other cultures #see me as the butt of the joke bc of this like aforementioned irish chef at work VOCALLY slates the english all the time #but it's done in an environment where we're FRIENDS and it's poking fun at each other while still addressing a very serious history. like?? #idk if any of this is worded in a way that makes sense but yeah. i have thoughts #cant believe i got inspired to make an actually serious post bc of the CHEFS AT WORK. embarrassing. no one let them see this

[spiritofjustice]

people always complain about the Tazmily villagers being massive cunts to Lucas during Mother 3 (understandably so, though i think it’s given the entire town a bad rap that isn’t totally deserved) but honestly i kinda. really like it? there’s just something interesting about how a lot of rpgs like this have your town or whatever town you go to supporting you. it’s a neat subversion to have the town you grow up in turn on you for trying to save them because they don’t know any better.

it’s extremely interesting seeing your town, people who have known you your whole life, fall victim to propaganda and lies to the point that they act in unrecognizable ways, but you choose to help them anyways because it’s in your nature.  when the world resets, it gives them a chance to start over.  i think that’s the implication of the ending, considering a lot of Mother 3 is about letting go and forgiving.  i think the villagers needed to be shitty to help drive home that theme (though a lot of them remained relatively kind, i’d say about 50/50 either way).

it also does a lot to say that cruelty can come from anywhere. you don’t have to be a bad person to do bad things like that, but also that it isn’t necessarily a permanent thing, or that there’s more to people than just the bad things they’ve done.  i feel like Mother 3 ends with the idea that the world is given another chance, and that’s huge.  even if the world was cruel, it still deserved kindness back in hopes of a better future.  the Tazmily villagers are still just people, after all.

Itoi gave the villagers a lot of depth to show how multi-faceted people can be, both kind and cruel, good and bad, and leaves the ending up in the air for people to decide what everyone will choose to do once the world begins anew.  one can only hope that they would do better.

#Psy's no punctuation posts #mother tag #mother 3 #no 1 tazmily village defender right here but like!!! man!!! they have so much depth i feel gets ignored sometimes :[ #it's interesting observing who remains kind and friendly and who changes #some are expected like Elmore and Pusher but then you'll see some nasty shit come out of like Jackie or Brenda's mouth and it shocks you #again it's just! it shows you that good people can be bad too but not that it means they're unsaveable or whatever #they're just. people #and i like to think they took the time after the world was saved to reckon with what they'd done and improve #that's huge for me. i think the town has worked really hard on getting better #esp. after regaining their memories too which i imagine happened eventually too

[oca-rinn-a]

in this world where so many members of our species, with supposed moral agency, are killing small things for nothing but the crime of existing, and so many are blind to the value of any species which does not benefit them in a way they can personally measure... do you ever feel so so panicked and suffocated?

#i had to walk onto the tracks at the NYC Times Square station to retrieve an injured pigeon who was trapped down there #no idle police officers or MTA personnel cared at all when I explained that an injured animal was trapped on the tracks #the MTA staff told me to ask the cops to help #the cops told me to ask MTA staff for help #the cops said “if it were a person that would be different” #i looked like a crazy person bc i was having a panic attack and trying to ask people for help at the same time #my partner called animal control and they said there was nothing they could do #the Wild Bird Fund does not have the resources to retrieve animals but said that if i could catch the pigeon i was welcome to bring them in #and you know what #i did #if someone is in a life-and-death situation and you are in a position to help them then YOU SHOULD #what kind of fucking person would i be if i saw this pigeon #whom i am perfectly physically able to rescue from their situation #and i said wow that's too bad that they're going to die down there #if only it weren't illegal/dangerous to go onto the tracks #a cell phone is valued 1000% more than a non-human's life #it's fucked up guys (: #anyway i learned first hand that literally no one in NYC will stop you from doing anything at all #as long as you aren't brandishing a weapon or some other murderous action literally no one cares what you're doing and will not stop you #so be punk and take action #fuck speciesism #animal rights #animal welfare #humans are animals #also sorry but people stomping on bugs who are literally OUTSIDE and doing seriously nothing but existing #why would you do that #please get help #talk to a therapist

[goldensunset]

i don't really know how to word this but like i feel like i'm gonna forever have to deal with the pain and heartache of one of my very first pokémon games- the first 'normal' pokémon game i've ever played, that i will have lasting nostalgia and love for as a result of it being formative to my introduction into the series- being the one that will forever be looked down upon for bad graphics and technical issues as a result of the game having been rushed

like i honest to goodness want to scream and yell and cry into the void about how this means everything to me and will always be one of my fave games just in general. but how am i gonna do that without someone being like 'the broken overpriced mess? the one that's missing all this stuff from the older games that was great? the thing with all the cringe? that one?' or whatever. and the thing is they aren't wrong for their criticisms either like i know the fact that they rushed this wonderful game hardcore is a massive stain on its reputation and it hurts me too but like i cannot turn off the brain full of love in me and be a mean critic. or even an impartial one. i mean i criticize everything i love don't get me wrong i am constantly running my mouth about what i like and don't like. but at the end of the day i approach all media with an unusually optimistic mindset. if you see me talk a ton about something no matter what i'm saying you can bet it means i love it.

just. aaagh. it's always tough being a new fan of an old series. i'm like too embarrassed to express my opinions bc i feel like they're invalid y'know? i feel so exhausted every time i see something to the effect of like 'oh those poor kids these days having to deal with such bad quality everything what a bad time to be a fan of pokémon wow y'all make me feel so old' well see the thing is i actually am thriving and i love it here. and i'm also an adult myself so i have more critical thinking skills than people who played red when they were like five years old did. and even with the power of critical thinking i manage to be in love with this. join me in marvelling at the beauty of life

#sorry for the massive rant i am full of both love and rage but i feel alone in this world about this particular subject #my other fav complaint is like 'they make it too easy to xyz these days' #to me that reads like 'i suffered so why shouldn't they' #yes we should encourage people to spend 100 hours grinding to do basic story requirements. #to weed out the true gamers from the weaklings. or maybe we could use the spare time in our lives to touch grass #the only easy-fication change in sv i don't like is the ability to access boxes right from the menu #that kinda cheapens the need to strategically organize a team before heading somewhere #i can.. sorta understand being miffed about the remember moves mechanic? #frankly platinum was so stressful with not being able to freely switch without great hassle/cost #it would have been a fair enough compromise to make you pay a bit of lp or something #or do it for free but having to go to like a pokécenter or something #i'll never agree that exp share is bad though sorry #pokémon #ok but about the 'i feel bad for kids these days with these ugly designs/lame 3D models' thing #yeah i have news for you every gen has its ugly/stupid pokémon. #dude look at exeggcute #and some of the oldest spritework is hideous #granted the ds era spritework was beautiful #but i don't see what is so bad about the 3D models of today? they're both nice... #dude play an indie game or something if it's that important to you idk #it will never be the 90s again. it will never be the 00s again. i'm sorry.

[icewindandboringhorror]

There's always a slight yearning in the back of my mind wishing I had been born in the right place, time, family situation, income level, etc. to have just lived in one single house for my entire life. Imagine being born in a place that still suits you, even through all of your personal evolutions and etc. The idea of deep familiarity with an area because you've lived and explored it for 40+ years, being encased in a web of memories and connections. Being able to clean out your old childhood bedroom and find personal artifacts, to dig in the yard and remember. I know those lives can still be plenty imperfect, but there's just something so seemingly solid and stable and Grounding about it that I sometimes wish I could have.. (At least from my outside perspective as someone who's moved around a bit geographically and even within the same area, never lives in the same house/ apartment /etc. for more than a few years usually.) Like... having a place that is printed upon, fully your own, rather than chronically a visitor, every thought of a space always tempered with the notion that one day soon you'll have to pack it all up again, etc. There's something peaceful about the permanence.

#I think also because I'm a very nostalgic person - THOUGH not in the way that somep poeple mean when they say nostalgia because I've realiz #ed that to some people apparently it means like.. more of a sad emotional thing? Or when I talk about being nostalgic they say 'me too' and #then describe how they're always depressed dwelling on the past wishing they could revisit it and replaying it and feeling sad and etc. #Whereas for me - it's not in a deep or emotional way at all. It's very detached - kind of like someone who is doing like a scientific #cataloguing of something? I don't feel any remorse or sadness or longing or sitting there sobbing for hours over people/pets I've lost or #etc. It's more like a fun contemplative excercise and extension of self analysis plus just documentation. Like I know your memory fades as #you get older OR even as stuff is actively ongoing humans have terrible recall - even the ones who are less emotional/more focused on #accuracy our minds still twist things or etc. SO I looove to have documentations of everything possible so that in the future I will have #as full and complete of a view of myself as I possibly can. sure the image will undoubtedly be a little distorted but having real evidence #of how something was at a time is very valuable. You look through old messages or letters or something and you always find other alternate #versions of yourself. Not in a worse way like inherently inferior Previous Models Of You who haven't yet been perfected but even just in a #neutral way like 'what they're saying is not a BAd thing but also is not how I would say that today.' etc. ANYWAY I find it really interest #ing to document and remember things and love revisiting the past - not in a sad way - but just like. curiosity. reminiscing and recalling #and filling in gaps. or trying to have the same feeling I felt at a previous time so I can remember what it was. Collecting information for #documentation purposes. Like for example - I would love to go back and tour all of my old childhood houses/apartments. Not to like #sit in the middleof them and cry and go 'ohhh my childhood waughhh' - but literally because I want to take detailed photographs so I #can remeber exatly what they looked like and recreate them in sims or some other digital way. Why? idk. just to gather the information. If #I ever live to like 80 years old and I'm still reflecting on my life curious about the dteails of it. I want to be able to fire up my #ancient windows 10 laptop I've kept all these years and open up the sims 4 and tour my old home with accuracy etc. ?? #Not sure why really. Maybe an extension of how I generally care a lot about having an 'accurate' view of things? Like I would rather be #accurate than be happy. I don't understand 'ignorance is bliss' because I would always rather know. I always always in any situation am mor #focused on 'what is the well researched practical truth' than about 'how does this make me feel' or etc. Truth above ALL else even if it #were to make me miserable. Aka why I'm a 'boring' 'annoying' 'UM actually..' type of killjoy lol because it's very hard for me to understan #that some people can enjoy something or have a good time even not knowing the full facts of a situation or etc. BUT anyway. since that is #some core driver of my personality for whatever reason (just the plague of ennegram type 5 perhaps lol) maybe that also drives me to my #kind of minor obsession with like 'I must have a complete view and calatoguing of my life that is as accurate as possible within the means #i have' . Is it REALLY important for me to know the exact layout of on of my first childhood bedrooms? no. materially it does nothing for m #in life. BUT hey. it would make a great addition to the Accurate Life Story Catalogue lol. ANYWAY.. But I think a lot of wanting to live in #one place forever is not just the ease of documentation. but the sense of having a constant. Much of what i crave most in life is stability #& familiarity &routine bc of how my brain works. And it just would feel so good to be Settled. Never uproot again. One little place FOREVER

[hydrachea]

Canon Stellaron Hunters high school AU fresh from our very own Trailblazer's mind.

(Bonus: Dr. Edward said you can only dream about criminals if there's a little footnote in the bottom right corner of your dream at every moment reminding viewers that crime is bad and criminals are bad also.)

#hsr spoilers #honkai star rail spoilers #penacony spoilers #hsr #honkai star rail #ray's records #i'm crying what #go for it trailblazer #do we even need fanfiction anymore #i don't think we need fanfiction anymore #shame we'll never know where the dream went #so maybe we do need fanfiction after all #god even more than the dream dr edward's reaction had me HOWLING #'intentionally glorified' please sir i'm on tumblr you can't use these words on me this is a critical hit #that said #i am VERY amused #because i understand kafka and silver wolf their relationship with the trailblazer isn't too bad #but the fact that they saw blade (stabbed their friend) (multiple times) (would have stabbed them if needed) #and their subconscious went mmmm yes that's a bad boy right there #EVEN knowing that yeah they're apparently on texting basis #is hysterical to me

[emblazons]

I still can’t believe there are people who think that Will “I’m not gonna fall in love, just kidding I am in love already but I think I’ve been rejected so let’s rip off the bandaid” Byers isn’t going to get what he wants…in a show whose whole premise started with his abduction and is, by it’s creators own repeated admission, both going to focus on him the final season + about championing the underdog and the outcast.

It really is that simple, because once you know what the Duffers value...even if you haven’t dug that far into the show, it’s obvious where the “it started with Will, it will end with Will” is taking us based on tropes alone, if you listen to anything The Duffers say about their themes and narrative goals.

You don't even need color coding or parallels to other media to sort through it, because outside of any "but it was the 80s" commentary or "they would never break up the flagship couple" talk...Byler is literally just the logical thematic conclusion for Will's arc as the full embodiment of the outcasted, childlike AND the underdog, even if you don't like what they did to get our characters there.

Like? Will is literally the boy who represents the duffers love of being a “child at heart” and taking things you adored from your youth into being a grown up (see: their entire mf show being based on DnD and the media they loved as kids) on top of being a queer, poor, and regularly disrepected character.

He is the textbook representation of the outcast and underdog energy The Duffers love, to the point where you could hardly fit more "marginalized and imperfect" checkboxes into him without making him poc...and yet people actually believe he is going to be rejected not because there is no setup, or because there is no precedence for the storyline but solely because his love interest (who also has a non-conformity storyline and who is already making heart eyes at him) is currently dating a girl...and it would be "realistic" for him to get rejected? ☠️

Not to mention...I haven't even touched on how byler resolves Mike's own thematic issues and it already makes the most sense? Like?

How do you miss the most obvious plot twist setup in history not because its not blatantly set up, but because you’re homophobic? It really does have to be the blindness of heteronormativity thats driving most of this, because if you were a media literate homophobe, you would be screaming at the Duffers for doing it, not denying it’s happening at all. But ☕️

#byler #anti mlvn #duffer brothers #i am simply not blind enough for the foolishness of taking homophobes seriously tbh #their complaints are rooted in nonsense half the time #and yes this is kind of an offshoot of the 'bad writing' commentary of the tutor but #I swear on my LIFE knowing what good writing and a clear setup looks like makes byler so obvious its laughable #there's just no other thing they could be setting up with the choices they've made. everything else rings hollow #AND PEOPLE KNOW IT?!?! #mlvns saying things like 'it makes sense that mike and el have a less prominent role together in S5 but they won't break them up' #BABES LISTEN TO YOURSELF?!?! #the biggest season of the show and you think they're gonna let the 'flagship couple' be MID?! #Matt 'if its bad writing I'm not doing that shit' Duffer wouldn't even consider it. and its time you accepted that too 🤣 #ANYWAY #my st commentary #stranger things

[sysig]

Greetings, human! ♥ (Patreon)

#My art #SCII #ZEX #The Captain #A warmup that I took a little longer with - pacing myself?? Could be #I wanted to work on the daily more at the time but ah I had a good fun with this one ♪ #Even if it was one I failed to record hhhhuah #Oh well - next time lol #Mostly inspired by accidentally starting a new fic with these two heck #Yeah on top of the recent DAX ideas coming in my brain decided to prank me with Yet More inspiration lol #I'm happy about it! I do enjoy writing :) #But it's also Extremely self-indulgent so fjdslkafjd while I'm having fun it's also like Oh No I'm Having Too Much Fun With This lol #Not such a bad thing every once in a while ♪ #They're just so cute hehe #Been having a lot of fun with this sizing of chibis lately - small sketches then upsized to ~about where I'd want them on-screen #Maybe a bit small still but that's not that strange lol #I really want to hit whichever library near here has a Cricut I must learn how these machines function and how much they charge #I mean if I can just make bookmarks at home what might the library be able to offer me hehehe ♪ #Anyway

[cnl0400]

Thirteen's Birthday call (Year 1)

#obey me #obey me nightbringer #obey me thirteen #honestly my fav call!! I love her!! #“You make a good plaything” god I almost fainted 🥰🥰 #what are they thinking? are they trying to make me crazy?! honestly This call always makes me hopeful that she will become dateable 🥰🥰 #jokes aside this call is a bit sad too me #not even her sister spends time with her in her birthday? ouch.... #honestly is implied that she has a bad relationship with her sister... she's a loner but honestly I don't think she really *wants* that #with how much she hangs with MC post S4 in OG chats... It's a bit obvious she feels lonely...... #I really hope they try to expand on that... I really want that the devs give her her own arc #I have a lot of thoughts about her character but they're incoherent lol. maybe another day #anyways her voice is so pretty. did I mention that?

[willowser]

what's to come...

multi-chap stuff will be updated on a two week schedule ! 🤗 the rest will be posted depending on where they rank in the poll ! 🦋

pleased to meet you, dabi x f!reader ! (roughly) five chapters remaining.

southern charm, cowboy!bakugou x f!reader ! two chapters remaining.

my heart's aflame, my body's changed (but, god, i like it), werewolf!bakugou x f!reader ! modern au — no quirks, angst-heavy, explicit.

i fought them all off just to hold you close and tight, vampire!dabi x f!reader ! post-apocalyptic au, a bit bloody, explicit.

loving me is all you need, dabi x f!reader ! this is the 'if he's a serial killer...' smut chapter, gore/body horror, explicit.

hell was the journey, but it brought me heaven, ex-husband!bakugou x f!reader ! dad bakugou, mom reader, explicit.

remember me, love, when i'm reborn, dragon!bakugou x f!reader ! cross-species courting, accidental marriage ???, explicit.

*reminder that nothing is being posted yet !! this is for in the future only, when my hiatus has ended !!

#for full transparency sake: none of these are ready to be posted at this point in time #they're more holding together with glue and duct tape and love #but !! i'm jumping back and forth between them all and if i line them up and focus on them one by one #i will have them done in a decent amount of time i think !!! #the answer is to get out of my own way and let myself write however bad LOL and then edit later LOL #i'm also working on lil story pages for each that i will post once i'm happy with !! #and you are more than welcome to ask a bit about each of these if you'd like !!! #reminder that anything over 10k gets posted to ao3 only so...that will probably be most if not all of these LOL #but notices will be posted here too ofc !! #dragon bkg may be two parts haven't decided yet #one thing about me i'm gonna write an au #i've been on a monster f*cker trend lately idk what to tell you LMAOOOO exposing myself #✿ news

[mintjeru]

if you ever think you'll just "check the members' names and profiles" for a kpop group don't listen to that thought. that's the devil speaking and you Will fall into that fandom face-first

open for better quality | no reposts

#plave #bamby #kpop #fanart #myart #doodle #i got into this group in about an hour?? which is probably record time for me #i was scrolling through the profile of an artist i like and they had plave fanart for a member's recent birthday #and i was like hmmm i've heard of plave but i don't rly know what they're about.. let me check it out #saw all their songs and listened to their cover of d.ay6's 'you were beautiful' and it was immediately Over for me #wdym they can all sing and harmonize that well?? and hit all the high notes?? #leave some skill and talent for the rest of us omg #and i already have a bias as you can see ^^^^^^^^^^^ his little flowers thing is so incredibly cute to me #i'm noticing recently that i have a huge soft spot for gap moe #and so. i was compelled to draw him instead of things i Need to be drawing (again) hehe #watch me catch up on all their videos by the end of the day i'm not even joking i've got it bad here #edit: hours later and i am def a y.ejun stan too #they're all so 💕💕💕

[strangesickness]

losers playing ttrpgs... losers playing ttrpgs save me...

mike is running a multi-year homebrew ttrpg campaign that is basically just a combination of any rulebook the losers can get their hands on + anything they come up with. i know it to be true. the campaign started as a call of cuthulu campaign but it is now a terrifying mix of call of cuthulu, dungeons & dragons, and cyberpunk with elements from a dozen other games including star wars: the roleplaying game, warhammer, harnmaster and somehow alma mater(??? idk how. but i know this happened). richie was like. "mike man, i love you forever, you're great at this. but why don't i have magic powers?" and he pointed at ben's collection of d&d rulebooks he'd been browsing through and he sounded so earnest and excited that mike knew in that moment he was going to sacrifice the integrity of his cool mystery campaign so richie could cast vicious mockery (99% sure vicious mockery didn't exist yet... don't quote me on that but it doesn't matter because the idea of richie using it constantly is hilarious)

they've all been playing the same characters for years and they keep convincing mike to add more stuff so they're all like super powerful and mike keeps having to come up with more and more powerful enemies.

mike's dice collection is so so so cool he has so many dice, and whenever he introduces a new important character he goes out and gets dice that fit their theme and it is such a moneysink but it's worth it because ooooh pretty dice

after four occasions where the losers decided to adopt a random npc mike hadn't planned anything for, mike has started planning every single npc out down to the specifics of their childhood education. he has endless character sheets hanging out in his room with characters he's created that populate his game world.

okay hanbrough agenda time: bill is the most oblivious guy in the entire world. i know this. (he is the guy who looks at brokeback mountain and goes "what do you mean it was gay? why can't men be friends anymore?" this is based on that one passage at the beginning of the book where he goes on one of those "why can't the curtains just be blue because they're fucking blue" rants lol. he does not know what media literacy is. to me) and mike is. increasingly frustrated and feels like he's losing his mind. he is like head in hands because he asked bill to go to prom with him and bill was like "yeah sure man! sounds great, you're my bestie forever!", and he has no idea what to do, because how is this man this dense, so he just starts having all of his NPCs fall head over heels for bill's character and flirt like madmen. it is painful for everyone involved. except bill. who still has no idea what is going on. that is a very unfortunate month.

mike and ben hang out a lot and ben helps mike brainstorm for the campaign so ben has all this insider knowledge and mike will just look at him before something insane happens in the campaign. they'll like make eye contact and ben will be like holy shit holy shit holy shit :0 and mike just drops some insane new lore. it's very special to me.

#i know it might be like. why isn't ben or bill GM? they're the writers! #but like. idk it just fits. watching mike in it chapter 2 gave me so much unhinged GM energy #that man can spin a TALE. i know it. i also know he can improvise like crazy #they finish a session and he's like. btw guys everything after like the first hour was improvised i hope it didn't feel to awkward #and the losers are like... wdym you didn't perfectly plan all of that????? #bill could not run a campaign to save his life. he does not know what chekhov's gun is. he does not know what nuance is. #he would be trying to run a campaign and the losers would do ANYTHING even slightly off the hyperspecific plan he made #and he'd start trying to railroad everyone and everyones just getting increasingly stressed #basically it would be a bad time #that man can't do improv i know it in my heart #ben on the other hand is a massive ttrpg nerd and has run multiple one shots with the losers #he's not big into long campaigns like mike is but he loves coming up with new campaign ideas #he also collects ttrpg rulebooks and is always looking for weird ones to try out with his friends <3 #they all have so much fun doing character creation with ben too. it's great. #i'm not done with this btw. i have so much more to say #i love ttrpgs and a party is the highest level of friendship. this is true #my high school best friends were literally just my d&d party #and cyberpunk (the ttrpg) is how i made friends in college lol #posts afflicted with a strange sickness #it stephen king #it 2019 #it 2017 #mike hanlon #bill denbrough #ben hanscom #hanbrough #richie tozier