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stridersshitpost · 2 days
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**ALMOST**
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sleepy-bebby · 24 hours
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cosmiclion · 3 days
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I refuse to be deflated (no I won't get tired of making memes).
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ladytoon70 · 2 days
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Slightly more accurate KOBD wall slam
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madame-helen · 2 days
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cinnamonpeqch · 2 days
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Dick: Lol ok lil baby
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the-alpine-glow · 3 days
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me so very very oftenn
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mspaintbladie · 2 days
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hands you a seasem cak
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spirk-trek · 1 day
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Presented without context.
If you know - you know.
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fozmeadows · 20 hours
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I'm sorry but Christian Mingle paying for ad space on tumblr dot com is one of the funniest demographic mismatches I've ever fucking seen, I'm wheezing
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hamoodmood · 1 day
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I'll be alone for the rest of my life
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♱ Father Forgive Me (For I have Sinned) ~Chapter Eleven ♱
Lucifer Morningstar x Angel!Reader Fandom: Hazbin Hotel Chapter Eleven Warnings: profanity Click on the first tag to see all the other chapters
♱Where the purest soul in Heaven falls for the Devil♱
[Chapter Eleven]
You groaned, prising open a tube of concealer. You looked in the mirror. The guests were due to arrive in an hour.
I hope she doesn’t look like him, you thought mutedly, applying a few dots to your under eye. You pulled away, fixing your hair, and sighed. You looked like your old self again. Did you feel like your old self?
Well, hardly. 
You let your hair fall around your face, before stepping across the now-spotless living room towards your phone, which lay on the kitchen counter. It beeped. It was from Sera: Coming soon.
You typed back hastily. Ready. Then set the phone back on the table.
You sighed. 
♱♱♱
You smoothed down your top, watching Sera’s unmistakable silhouette approach down the street, three shorter figures in tow. You recognised Emily, her excited self buzzing around two more unfamiliar people. Your throat closed up as they got closer.
“And as for where you’ll be staying,” Sera was saying. She paused, eyes flicking to you. She glanced at you up and down, taking in your appearance which was more refined than the last time she saw you, and nodded slightly with approval, a gentle flick of the head that was barely noticeable. “This here is [name]. She’s one of our best angels here. The kindest soul you’ll ever meet.” Her hand closed around your shoulder and you couldn’t bring it in you to smile. 
Your gaze drank in the two demons- and you figured out which one was Charlie immediately. The red spots on her cheeks and soft blonde hair was unmistakable. Her eyes glowed at you, bright and friendly. 
 Your eyes shifted quickly to the other sinner, not being able to look at her for too long. And the sight knocked the breath out of you. 
You let out a small gasp, but the pleading look on her face shut you up. You knew her. She was an exorcist, the one Lute hated, the one who’s eye had been cut out by Lute. You could guess just by her missing eye, and the fact that the energy she exuded was most certainly angelic. 
“This is Charlie Morningstar, and her companion.”
You forced a smile onto your face and stretched out your hand. “It’s a pleasure.”
Charlie took it, shaking it excitedly. “Hi! Thank you so much for taking us in.” She looked at Vaggie, who you nodded at, a ghost of a smile on your lips as you extended your hand towards her too, which she took gingerly. “I’m Charlie, and that’s Vaggie. Even though Sera already said.” Her smile was bright and enquiring. It warmed you up, a lump in your throat rising up as you remembered Lucifer. 
You nodded again at Sera, who nodded back. 
“See you later!” Emily said cheerfully, before her and Sera flew off into the distance. You spun around, keeping your eyes glued to the ground. 
“We should go inside,” you said briskly. You could hear Charlie conversing excitedly with Vaggie behind you as you entered. 
You stepped aside to let them in before shutting the door gently behind them. You looked up. Charlie was looking around in wonder. 
“It’s so clean,” she said, then turned to you. “I hope you didn’t clean up just for us,” she murmured apologetically. You smiled and squeezed her hand. 
“Don’t worry, love. It’s always like this.” 
She flushed and smiled, turning back to Vaggie. You cleared your throat. 
“Feel free to explore,” you said, gesturing around the house. “Your rooms are upstairs. I just need to finish up some stuff here.”
You pulled out your phone while they went inside, tipping your head down to type. You heard someone clear their throat. You glanced up. It was Vaggie.
“Vaggie,” you smiled at her. She cleared her throat, shifting from foot to foot nervously, before something in her seemed to click and her face turned firm. 
“I know that you know,” she began, and you held up a hand to quiet her.
“Don’t worry, love. I won’t tell a soul.” You smiled at her gently, and for a moment she looked like she would burst into tears but then something in her seemed to shift again before she cleared her throat.
“Thanks,” she said gruffly. “That’s nice of you, I…I appreciate it.”
You heard something thud from your room. 
You burst in, to see Charlie standing in the middle, shocked. “Sorry,” she stammered. “I just walked in, and…” You saw something clutched in her hand. 
The red feather.
Without thinking, you snatched it away from her. She looked shocked and guilty all at once, a mixture of emotions written across her face that made you stomach churn. Cradling the precious keepsake, you stumbled back. 
“I’m sorry,” she repeated. You laughed, nervously. It came out hysterical. You could feel Vaggie standing in the doorway, her eyes on your back. 
“It’s fine,” you managed to choke out. Her eyes landed, intent, on the feather, before flicking back up to meet yours anxiously.
“I really didn’t mean to snoop around,” she began. You pocketed the feather and put your hand on her shoulder, steering her out of the room.
“It’s fine,” you repeated again, more calmed down now. She twisted her head to look back at you. “Believe me.”
“I’ll show you to your rooms,” you said, frazzled.
♱♱♱
“I didn’t know if you were sharing a room or staying in separate ones, so I kept two ready just in case,” you explained, gesturing to the doors on either side of the corridor. Vaggie and Charlie both exchanged a glance, which made your heart pound. Charlie turned to you. 
“[name], you’re the nicest person we’ve ever met,” she said abruptly. You blinked, then laughed nervously, again.
“Oh, I mean, you’ve probably met nicer-“
“She’s humble too!” 
You could have swore there were tears in her eyes, and wondered if she was usually so dramatic. It was endearing. “Charlie… don’t worry about it.”
A minute she was standing around you, and then another minute she was engulfing you in a hug. You didn’t mind, however, wrapping your arms around her. “You’re the coolest,” she mumbled, voice muffled by your shoulder. “I walked into your room and invaded your privacy and you didn’t even get mad, and I feel awful. But you forgave me.” You chuckled nervously, again.
 I fucked your dad, was what you thought. “It isn’t really a big deal,” was what you said. 
Vaggie prised her off of you. “Give her some space, Charlie.” 
“Sorry,” Charlie stuttered. You laughed. 
“Don’t worry about it. Now go on. Good luck in court.” You flicked your head at their room. They entered, flashing smiles at you as they did so. Vaggie paused, her foot in the door.
“Won’t you be there? In court, I mean.” Her eyes were serious.
You shook your head, clasping your hands behind your back. She frowned. “I know you, [name]. I remember you. You’re one of the greatest angels in heaven. If you’d heard the things Sera had said about you to us, you would have fainted.”
You sucked in a breath. “They worry that I’ll be influenced since you guys are living here with me, that’s why.” Normally, they wouldn’t be worried about you, but you didn’t have the heart to mention that Adam had most likely come up with that reason to keep you out of court. Vaggie frowned at the look on your face, then nodded, before entering the room. The door shut softly. You stood there awkwardly in the hallway, even after the door had shut.
You sighed, then pulled out the feather. It was bent from your scuffle with Charlie. You quickly brought to your lips, before setting it back in your pocket. 
“[name]?” 
You looked up. “Charlie. Didn’t you go inside?”
“I just came back out now. Didn’t you…didn’t you hear me?”
You had been too preoccupied with your thoughts to notice a thing. “I’m afraid not.” You took a step back. “Sorry, it’s weird that I’m still out here, right? I was just thinking about…things.”
Charlie nodded slowly. “I just need to ask you some things,” she said, and her voice was solemn. You pulled back, shrinking into yourself. 
“Can I see that bracelet?”
Your eyes fell to your wrist.
For a moment you couldn’t speak, your voice had eluded you: yet you managed to utter a single: “No.”
She looked taken aback for a second, and you felt taken aback too. You cleared your throat. “I’m sorry.” She smiled reassuringly. You flushed. 
“It’s fine. Can you at least tell me…where the feather came from?” She fiddled with her fingers, chewing her lip nervously. You shook your head, speechless. She looked disappointed.
“It’s alright, I understand.” She smiled again, and you smiled back, relieved at her genuine expression.
“Goodnight, Princess Charlie,” you said gently. 
“Goodnight, [name],” she said softly, shutting the door. The corridor dimmed.
You took in a shaky breath, returning to your room. You slipped the feather under your pillow.
“Good night,” you whispered under your breath. 
♱♱♱ A/N: ik i said I’d slow down posting but then I went to class and wrote this so here you go
Not Charlie wondering why this random lady has her dads feather and bracelet ☠️
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stridersshitpost · 3 days
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I hate this he looks so ugly
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limbobilbo · 21 hours
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No ‘i would simply kill myself’ or ‘I choose none’
You have to pick one.
If you dont know what they do look it up
Remember to reblog for a bigger sample size
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wide-lay · 22 hours
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