#{ I hate how scared i felt in the car...trapped and cornered }

[orchidwilt]

what a time, what a time

(a song-inspired diary entry)

i feel a little nauseous and my hands are shaking

i see hundreds of cars every day working in the drive thru, and sure, every once in a while i’ll see the occasional dark red jeep that reminds me of yours. but i know it’s not your car, because it just never is. i thought you’d know better than to visit the store i worked at, but i guess you probably thought i wouldn’t be there, apparently we were both wrong.

but even though i know it’s not your car, my heart still flips at the sight. the idea of you coming through secretly excited me, i think some romantic part of me hoped you would try to remedy what you did while ordering some chicken.

i remember feeling scared too, like if you would pull through with a girl in your passenger seat or one of your friends that probably wouldn’t even know we knew each other. that’s how i would react realistically, i’d say, like a professional because i’m not getting paid to fulfill my personal vendetta i’m paid to take chicken orders.

i guess that means you’re close by

i saw the jeep roll around the corner far before you saw me i’m sure, and tried to will it to go into another lane so i wouldn’t have to think of it again. but of course, only two cars away was the owner of a crimson red jeep that was sincerely regretting his lane choice with every passing moment.

summer wind ripped through my hair and i straightened up, blinking surprise out of my eyes and tending to the car in front of me. but i knew what was happening, and ready or not you were going to have to talk to me.

my throat is getting dry and my heart is racing

the half second of eye contact we shared was enough to confirm my greatest fear as you stared straight at me. i wish your laser stare had disintegrated me, i really do.

i tried to stall the cars before you as i scrambled to think of how to handle this, but within minutes your tires rolled in front of my feet.

i haven’t been by your side in a minute 

i remember coming out of the dorm hallway through those double doors and down the steps to your tinted windows. but as soon as i tried the door i was met with your smiling face fucking with the locks, every single time. in the nights where i hadn’t smiled in hours and called you to cheer myself up, that stupid prank was usually the first thing to break my mood.

that feels so far away, i suppose now it has been 8 months. but when you came through 6 months ago, you showed me the pain of strangers, to lovers, to strangers again. 

i hate thinking about the way you looked at me. a icy blue wall of waiting for me to speak, lips pursed and eyebrows drawn. you were waiting for me to set the tone, but something in your eyes told me you already knew i wouldn’t pass this opportunity up. i had you trapped. i remember your eyes felt like you were monitoring my response to your presence. that pissed me off, how you ghosted me up until the very moment i had to make the first move.

but i think about it sometimes

“if you don’t have anything to say for yourself then go ahead and order.” my voice sounded strong, fueling to my anger above every other emotion. i pushed my panic down and took his order, a twinge of annoyance present in his tired voice. it made me angrier. i remember flicking his card from his hand, and firing some last remark before walking to my next car. 

each step sent me further into the sky, walking away from someone i used to value but no longer know. details flooded back to me, the freckles on your face and what hung from your rearview mirror. my brain rushed to update my now painful memories of you with more accurate descriptions of your voice and your eyes, and suddenly i was the one that felt trapped.

even though i know it’s not so distant

the panic demanded to be felt. icy blue memory broke my mental dam and i was a flood in a paper cup at the weeks of heartache and confusion i experienced a month before this horrible day. i got through three cars before my hands shook too much to take orders and my breathing in the summer heat was beginning to concern the guest. “take a minute,” she said, and i snapped my head up as i realized she was a real person and i needed to stop interacting with guests before i started crying.

i shoved my shit to my coworker and sped into the restaurant, past your car waiting for your food but i didn’t look back at you, i knew my face was heating up and my efforts were focused on walking tall in case you noticed. i doubt you did.

oh no i still want to reminisce it

i was especially grateful for storage closets for the first time in my life, but hating how my sister in law had to rub my sweaty, shaking back as i blubbered to her about having to take the order of someone from the list of people i never wanted to see again. despite her efforts i was done working for the day and wanted to go take a shower and pack a bowl to take my mind off of it. i’m grateful i was able to leave, less grateful for feeling like taking care of my mental state gave you power.

but i felt like it did. because i went home and told a friend, and just like tonight the memories of our friendship felt visceral in my mind. it bubbles up and i distract myself, but like that day i decided to embrace it tonight and write this clusterfuck of a tumblr post.

i think of the night in the park it was getting dark and we stayed up for hours

we were in your new car then, the brand new crimson jeep you prided yourself on, one hand at 12:00 wrapped loosely around your steering wheel. that was the night we came up with our handshake and i showed you photos of how pretty i could be--but we were just friends, it was just mindless flirting, right? that’s what i thought when we pulled into a neighborhood you dared not to visit since your ex from so many years ago lived here. but we pulled up anyway because i gave you the confidence to show me this ethereal lake you hyped up so much. “the perfect date spot” i thought mainly you showed it to me to brag about being a local.

it was the spot of some magical date with her, and i could soon see why. clamoring out of the car and into the midnight cool air, immediately regretting my thin leggings and letting you get a blanket from your trunk for me. it was rancid, but i was cold and something about the classic florida brush and trees walling off the forest intrigued me.

so we ducked into a seemingly random area of trees near the car and stumbled down some wooden “path”, flashlights dashing wildly to the woods as i freaked you out about animals to ease my own fears. when we finally broke into a clearing that felt straight out of the hunger games, pure moonlight shone in pearlescent blues to the grass below. and the stars, god, you would have never guessed we were standing in the middle of a suburbia in florida. I remember stopping to take it all in when you continued to walk, even before the dock I knew this night would have any girl of yours swooning.

not me, though. because we were just friends, and we were just driving somewhere to clear our heads from our own busy little worlds like we had so many times before. so i walked after you, closing the distance in fear of the neighbors up the hill behind us. and we walked onto the lone dock, overlooking a perfectly secluded lake, a thick tree line separating the tranquil scene from the interstate. it felt straight out of a john green book, and i thought you were going to try to kiss me. the stars over the water were rooting for us, i’m sure of it.

it’s what i thought would happen when we leaned against the wooden railing, and i told you how i felt like i failed as a daughter and a sister, but never as a friend. and how you know, and how much you cared for me and valued our unlikely friendship. we sat on the bench and i pulled my knees into my chest, the smelly blanket draped over me, and i wanted to rest my head on your shoulder. i wish you had tried to kiss me that night, something tells me i would have let you. and looking at it now, i wonder if it would’ve prevented or accelerated our fall from ethereal nights.

what a time, what a time, what a time,

i have the moment on stream clipped where you called and told me to meet you out, mainly to watch the conflict in my eyes and faint hurt from you ignoring me on my birthday thus far. i quickly end stream after that and sprinted a few blocks to the line you were in, and thus began our last night.

i didn’t think i would let it get that far when we were walking to your friend’s car after getting pissed off in the club and you asked if you looked good in your shirt, and i said yes without thinking. you got me good for admitting that one, you little shit. i sat in the drivers seat because it was the same make and model as my car, and we cranked the ac and pulled out a handle of pink whitney. that isn’t what i thought you meant by getting a drink from the car, by the way.

i wasn’t going to indulge you after being distant on my birthday, but i got bored of being sober and gulped it down like the best of them. i’m pretty glad i did, i think it added fuel to the fires. 

you asked to kiss me before i was drunk, and i said no. i said it was too soon, that i wanted to wait a little bit. i was echoing what i had said to my mom and my therapist about you, even though i didn’t really want to wait once i realized i liked you that night. and then we watched college kids stumble from club to club in college town, a typical friday night in the spring but watching it from a parked car somehow made it more glorious. it was helpful to watch something when you made me blush with sudden compliments, the streetlights and neon store fronts making it easier to talk somehow. 

you asked to kiss me again, and i told you on june 18th i’d kiss you but not before then, thinking that hopefully by then your friend will be away and we can pile memories to distance ourselves from how we met. it was almost a plan in my head i thought of for a while, this hope that by the summer everything would work out for us but i didn’t want a relationship before then. maybe that was trivial, but you almost agreed to it too. then pink whitney woke up something within me, and i realized you were right in front of me, looking at me like that and talking in that lower voice about how i was all you could think about. 

i can’t believe that even worked. i think i just wanted it to, wanted it to mean you thought about me even when i wasn’t drunk on my birthday wearing that in a locked car with my hot best friend. you wanted me there and then, so why resist someone i’ve gotten so close with?

our slowburn friendship finally got the better of us that night, no doubt aided with that adult pink lemonade we passed back and forth.

you clinged to my body like you wanted it forever

you had asked to kiss me again, this time i caught your smile with my lips, pulling on that shirt you did look good in and letting low flames flicker in my stomach. you brought your hand up to hold my head into yours, and only then did i realize my hands hadn’t appreciated their perfect compliment enough. our lips danced and pink whitney fizzed on our lips, a taste so delicious i couldn’t believe it took me this long to kiss you. my hands on the side of your neck then in your hair, pulling you in but matching your rhythm, every pressure and touch melting my judgement.

and then your phone went off, because i really am in a john green novel. it was your friend, marching back to his car with some random women i didn’t really want to meet. i think they were fates, shooing me off before i could make more memories that would come back to haunt me.

i remember stepping out of the car to leave and you hugged me, and i think part of my intoxicated brain knew this would be the last good night in a long time. i looked at you in the dark parking lot, the streetlights and storefronts painting the last mental picture i’d have of you smiling at me.

i ran home. with every step i began to lose my breathing, and by the time i got to the dorm i realized what i’d done and how irreparable it could be.

this thought haunts me. that when i got home, part of me knew everything would change for the worse. i cried because if you were like all the others you’d probably walk away at this point.

you said you wouldn’t but you did. and part of me knew you would. for one, you told me about girls for months and i knew you wanted to run or lie when things got complicated. for two, you were never one for keeping secrets from your friend, and i’m sure as soon as you told him what happened the two words for our terrible conclusion were spoken.

what a time, what a time, what a time,

i refused to believe i was right. i called you dozens of time, texted you more, tried to pull together the perfect words to get you to respond. it didn’t work, you never did. i don’t need to tell you that.

i cursed every color into my pillow, face beat red with disappointment and rage and desperation. i cried until my ribs folded up and bled, until i cried dust and my big heart couldn’t ache any more. 

every bone in me wants to spit at how i reacted to you leaving me, but in kinder moments i know you were just the perfect trigger to a manic episode waiting to happen. i was manic because you said you cared but apparently not that much, you said you wouldn’t leave like how i’ve been left before but you did. you were just a trigger, the exact way to unravel me again until i sunk through the floor and into the dirt.

every day that passed, every missed call and unanswered text sent another pang into my heart, another reminder that you really didn’t care. that i was the last to figure it out, and it showed with every embarrassing fail to talk to you. i wish you had just blocked me. it would have been kinder. i wish you had just sent those two words even, i feel like my dumbass would have realized much sooner.

for you and i

but hey that’s bro code  ¯\_ (ツ)_/¯

#diary #songfic #what a time it was #diary entry #short poem #trauma dumping on the internet #letter to burn #short story #prose #short prose

[rambleswhatsthepoint]

07/23/23

Every day is a new first without her. And every day it hurts. Nugget is always looking for her. He used to go out and pee so fast and back in and now he is sniffing everywhere looking for her. My mom had said she had taken him out and he brought her to the corner at the intersection where she died and just sniffed and sniffed. He did the same to me yesterday evening. It was the first time I even let myself walk near that spot.

I threw two toys out of the bin the other day and he didn’t know what to do with them. He’d always played toys with Stella. They’d chew their bones side by sides. They’d tug and chase. So that made me very sad. But then last night he played a little by himself and that warmed my heart a little.

I can’t use the backseat of my car behind me. That’s where she was.

Stella I miss you so much. I miss the way you’d always find a way to lean on me and cuddle with me. Plopping all 57 pounds down next to me was so comforting. I never felt alone. I always felt loved and protected with you. My stubborn and silly girl. So afraid of fireworks and booms. Barking at people walking by and deliveries. Leaning your head on my lap. Squishing yourself onto the couch next to me. Leaning your head on me when I was working to get my attention. Ringing the bell to go out. Cuddling with the kitties, especially Alley. Playing chase and hide and seek with me and my mom from the hallway to the living room hallway. Having happy walks. Having bad walks where you were pulling so hard trying to “get” or scare away dogs across the street. Being so scared of the garbage truck when you were a baby. Laying on your back with your legs up in the air. Letting me rub your belly. Laying by me like a good girl while I ran on the treadmill. Going for little jogs. Wearing your harness. Wearing your winter coats. Slapping your paws down when you wanted to play. Your long happy tail, so expressive and it had the little white tip at the end. The white tipped back feet. Your frito paws. The delicious smell of you from when you were a baby, how I could still smell it on you faintly even when you were a big girl already. How you’d bite your own nails so I never had to get them trimmed hardly. How you hated to have me trim them. Your little white patch under your chin that made people think maybe you were older. Your funny hound mouth, slightly saggy jowls. Your super soft floppy ears. The way your brown fur glistened in the sun. The way your fur would trap heat from the sun so fast, just like mommas dark hair. The way you’d tried to eat grass. The way you were so kind and playful with nugget and Roger. The way you loved chicken and fish skin and deli meat and treats. The way you’d chew your bone like a good girl and keep your teeth so clean. The big sigh you’d give every now and then. Your snoring and sleeping so deeply. Your dreaming. The way you got sick and drooly in the car but seemed to grow out of it. The way you were nervous around strangers. Your bark and your howl and the “growly talk” you’d do sometimes. The way you’d sit and watch out the window. Your zoomies running around and around the living room. The way you looked so happy when I’d pet your face and ears. Our morning routine of good morning, did you have a good sleep? Did you have good dreams? Are you ready to start the day? How you would follow me everywhere unless there were fireworks and you were scared. How you’d sit on the ottoman downstairs while I ran. How you’d snoot people in the butt lol. Your skinny legs and the way you’d trot on our walks. The way your body swayed on walks. Your funny pink armpit patches. You loved to sniff and pee places to leave messages. Your brown eyes and sweet smile and the way I could feel your heart beat when you were laying on me.

Oh Stella I miss you so much and would give anything to go back in time and you’d still be with me. And nugget would still have his big sister. And we’d be together for another decade or more, happy and loved. If there is such a thing as a multiverse I hope there are many where we are still together and happy. I love you and I’m so sorry. You are my baby, my baby girl.

I hope you hear me when I talk to you still. Feel my love and sorrow. Walk with us and sleep with us and sit by me. Wait for me. I love you Stella. I hope we will see each other again. We will be together again.

#online journal #my life #rambles #grief #grief/mourning #pet loss

[haechanniesunflowers]

Mafia!Ateez reaction to s/o being abused by her family

Warnings: READ AT YOUR OWN RISK domestic abuse, bruises, scars, toxic family behaviour, manipulation, torture, mentions of blood, smoking, murder, death

I'm so sorry if this made you uncomfortable, my dms are always open if you want to talk about anything

Requested by @racheloveyunho

It only gets darker and longer with the next member

Hongjoong

He came home early so you weren't prepared and were wearing a tanktop with shorts

He saw the bruises on your back and thighs

When he asked you about it later that day, you sobbed and told him that your brothers beat you because you insisted on moving in with Hongjoong

Would pretend that it didn't affect him but on the inside he's furious

He himself doesn't like to physically discipline anyone unless it is necessary or they get on his nerves and bring him to that point

How dare they lay a finger on you

He wouldn't change his behaviour with you, he'd be his usual caring self, all the while planning to knock some sense into your brothers

He laid a trap for your brothers to fall right into and met with them personally

He's a reasonable man so he started with talking to them but when they didn't listen and called him slurs he threatened to murder them

They knew Hongjoong was a part of a mafia and didn't want to anger him any further

They promised him that they would treat you better

Seonghwa

You told him you tripped and fell while you were packing your things to move in with him and that's how you got the bruise on your head and a busted lip

He bought it honestly because he's soft for you and couldn't see you like that so his focus was to get you the medical treatment you needed

You were happy with him and spent almost all of your time with him but he didn't want to hold you back form meeting your friends and family

You were ecstatic to meet your friends but not your family

They hurt you after all

So when he had someone drop you off to your family house, you were nervous but still went inside to meet them

What you got was taunts and verbal abuse

When you tried convincing them that Seonghwa was indeed very kind and loving towards you, they hit you so hard, you lost your balance and your back hit the glass corner of the table which you tried holding onto and ended up scratching your upper arm, drawing blood

You were shocked and hurt and ran out of the house

You hailed a taxi and went to your friend's house and told Seonghwa to pick you up from there

When he came home that night, you were already asleep

In the morning he woke up and found you in the kitchen at the brink of tears and you cheek was a little swollen and purplish

He asked you what happened but you said you liked hanging out with your friends yesterday and these were tears of joy and that your swollen cheek was because you ran into a glass wall

He believed you like always and wrapped his arms around you to pull you into an embrace and accidentally put pressure on the bruise on your back from yesterday

You yelped and arched your back

This time he didn't ask you but lifted your shirt to see for himself, despite your protests and was shocked to say the least

He made you feel comfortable enough to tell him that it was your family's doing

He reassured you that everything will be okay and that you could stay with him forever

That night he paid your family a visit after you went to sleep

They never contacted you again

Yunho

Your family was very religious and never really messed with you because Yunho made it very clear how protective he was towards you

Any bitter comment from your family would earn them a death glare from Yunho

He'd stare them down until they got super uncomfortable

Nobody knew what he was capable of, other than the fact that he was involved with a mafia

Your family wanted you to stay away from him but you loved him and he had promised to protect you and shield you from the mafia life

Yunho's girlfriend had no face, no one in the mafia world had ever seen you

One day you were visiting your family to celebrate your sister's birthday

You felt unwelcomed, you own blood was making you feel uncomfortable

When the guests had left and it was time to open the presents, your brother told you to go home

You were embarrassed but tried to reason with him that you guys were family

He started saying hurtful things and called you a slut and accused you of selling yourself to a dirty mafia rat who kills people for a living. He said you are nothing but his whore and he will replace you one day when he is tired of you and then you will have no one to turn to because they didn't consider you family anymore

You got up and went to the home. The home Yunho had made in the middle of a dense forest to hide you and came to see you almost every day

Yunho had decided to complete his work in advance today so he could spend more time with you in the next days, since you said you would be at your family house today

You unlocked the door and went in crying. You were wailing so hard that you laid on the floor in the lobby

You screamed when you felt someone grab you by your arms and made you sit up

Yunho looked at you in shock and worry, you nuzzled your face in the crook of his neck and cried your heart out, not caring if you were being loud and looking like a mess

You didn't need to tell him what had happened because he was aware your family had something to do with this

You woke up in bed the next day, feeling numb but had a severe headache

You looked around the room and saw a shirtless Yunho starting outside the window, you called out to him "Yunho..."

"I don't want to know what they did or said. I'm never ever going to allow you to meet them again. It took everything I had in me to stop from murdering them because I don't want to hurt you, but I can't have anyone else hurting you either"

He turned around and looked furious, you had only once seen him this angry when a spy from another mafia broke into your house and tried to stab you. Yunho had ripped his jaw off of his face with his bare hands in front of you and you fainted from shock from the intensity of the situation

Right now he had the same look on his face and you didn't want to anger him any further

Yeosang

He had never been the one to talk a lot

His calm and collected nature made people underestimate him

Your family used to love Yeosang and were supportive of your relationship with him, they were happy when you moved in with him, but that was before they knew who he was

Only you knew that Yeosang was a cold blooded killer. He was his gang's ace, he was sharp, very intelligent and very manipulative, not to mention he was the second most strongest member and was very good with weapons, his speciality being butterfly knives. He killed people the bad guys and felt no remorse. His gang members often joke that he only feels two emotions, rage when the bad guys cause menace and love towards you.

He got you pregnant and you were now worried but Yeosang had reassured you that no one in this world will ever lay a finger on you as long as he is by your side. He made you feel safe and loved. He didn't trust anyone to help you around the house so he stayed home to help you.

One day your family came over to meet you and ask after you unannounced, you being 7 months pregnant, were home alone

They wanted to see your huge house, you were nervous because you didn't want them to see some rooms but couldn't keep up with them because you got tired from walking

Then the unthinkable happened, they saw everything. They saw Yeosang's training room, his collection of knives and bulletin boards with photos of people, nasty looking people. One board had two sets of photos of the same person, one photo was for Yeosang to know who to attack and the other photo of the same person killed by him. Yeosang never wanted you to see the contents of the room, let alone your family.

They told you to come with them and to leave Yeosang but you tried to tell them that you were more than okay and wanted to stay with him

It all happened too fast, your father grabbed you by your arm, dragged you outside and forced you to sit in the car while your mother pleaded to him to not shove you around like that in this state. They didn't drive home, they were fleeing the city to get as far away from Yeosang as possible

You were screaming, your parents paid no attention to you, they thought you were protesting but actually you were screaming because of the excruciating pain you were experiencing. You were bleeding and your mom had noticed it but they were on a highway and there was no hospital nearby. They couldn't do anything about it so they kept driving out of the city, your father hoping the child would die in your womb because he now hated Yeosang and wouldn't be able to love his child either.

You fainted and after 2 hours of driving, they got to a hospital. No one knew but you were carrying twins, sadly one of them had died in your womb while the other was born healthy. You were now fighting for your life. Your parents were scared for you and afraid of being tracked down by Yeosang.

You and your baby spent a month in the hospital and recovered enough for your parents take you with them

On the other side Yeosang was on the verge of a mental breakdown. He was out looking for you, now scared and confused and in rage. He didn't know who had taken you away and was frustrated and tired but he couldn't let you go. You were the love of his life and the only person in the world who ever loved him.

He got a lead on you and within hours was outside the house where your parents were hiding you.

He broke in the house in the middle of the night and found you crying on the bed with a sleeping child by your side. He instantly became soft at the sight, all the rage he had in him was replaced by love. He softly called to you and you whipped your head up and instantly ran to him.

You begged him not to harm your parents and he couldn't say no. He silently took you and his month old son back home in the dead of the night

San

San was not one person, he had two kinds of personalities, one was a ruthless assassin and the other, a passionate lover. Both personalities had him being manipulative in common

He absolutely hated your family because you were a free spirit and liked taking risks while they were the complete opposites and often tried holding you back but you always loved an adventure and that's how you ended up with Choi San.

You dispised your family the same as they did you. You were so used to the beating that you felt nothing now. Profanities were very common too and you wanted nothing but to slap each and every one of them and run away.

You were head over heals for him the moment he crossed paths with you but you didn't show that to him. He tried manipulating you into getting you to sleep with him but you knew better and brushed him off

He was used to women being on their knees for him so you not doing that was a challenge for him and he was hell bent on getting you to like him

He was going crazy over you and started meeting you at your workplace during his missions, like he had to kill a man in 30 minutes but he just had to see you first

When you weren't giving in to his art of seduction, he tried a different way

He asked you out like a decent human being and you said yes, wow that was easy, right?

No, you made him work hard for your love and affection and he was obsessed with making you happy to feel loved by you and by the time San realized what was going on, it was too late

He was madly in love with you and practically drooling over you

He finally asked you to move in with him and you said yes even though you knew your family would disapprove. You went home and packed your stuff and tried to leave but your family members didn't let you leave and in an effort of saving you from inevitable destruction which was Choi San, they beat you to the point you passed out.

They texted San from your phone, pretending to be you and told him to stay away and leave you alone, that you wanted nothing to do with him.

San was confused and scared when he got that text from you and texted you back to take your time and rethink your decision.

You woke up in your room at some point during the night, unable to open one eye because it had been bruised badly. Your head was bleeding and the blood had dried on your face. You left leg hurt a lot because of you lying in an unnatural position. You didn't have your phone or anything else

You felt empty and all you wanted was to be in San's loving embrace

It was now or never

You escaped from your window and somehow managed to get to San's front door, it was almost morning

You knocked on his door and called for him

He opened the door after some time and took in your form

He was in too much rage but he had to tend to you first

A few weeks later he came home and told you that he made sure your family is now in another city far away from you and won't contact you again

A tear slipped down your face, you were free from their torment

You kissed San and thanked him

He would do anything to make you happy

Mingi

Mingi was the notorious mafia leader who has connections with the government and the dark world

He had money and fame (the good and bad kind) and all that was missing was love and you filled that void

He loved you too much and would never let anyone hurt you

People knew better

So your own family, your own blood hurting you for wanting to live with Mingi didn't sit well with him

He was distracted at work and all he could see was your face, your tear filled eyes, your bruised arm and your distraught state

He wished he had sent someone to get you from your family house sooner so you didn't have to go through the abuse

He wished you never told them about it and just moved in with him

You were in his home, resting in his bed, thinking about what had happened

Did they really didn't see any good in Mingi?

Did they really have to hit you?

Did you do the right thing?

These thoughts flooded your mind and you were just as distracted

Mingi came home in a hurry and told you to come with him

You asked him where you guys are going and he says we're going to get back at them

He took you to your house and barged right in, unannounced

Seeing Mingi in person was overwhelming and your family were scared, pleading to him to let them go

Mingi told them that he was going to kill them for hurting you and there was panic and chaos

You came to stand next to him, squeezed his hand and softly told him that you want to go home

He couldn't say no to you so he warned them that this isn't over and took you home

You talked to Mingi and convinced him to let them go because they were your family after all

He's the one who said that if the loved toy and cared for you, they wouldn't hurt you like this and family doesn't mean you have to tolerate this kind I'd behavior when you're old enough to make decisions for yourself

You kissed him and wondered why couldn't your family see the good in him

Wooyoung

It started off with you slowly telling your folks about what Wooyoung did for a living

You were smart, so you didn't tell them about his business until you moved in with him otherwise they would have disapproved

You didn't mention that he tortured people and killed them without remorse, no, you said that he works with an organization that eliminates evil people which was true in essence

Your family was having none of it

They wanted you as far away from him as possible

You loved him and he loved you but they didn't believe it

They kept you from leaving the house and since Wooyoung was away for some time on a mission he didn't know

It was only when he got home that he found out that you hadn't returned, but he didn't think much of it because you were with your family

You on the other hand were panicking not only because you were being forced to stay away from Wooyoung but also because you just found out that you were pregnant

You had to get back to him no matter what

You refused to eat or talk to your family members, only demanding to meet Wooyoung

When he didn't get any message from you he began to get suspicious

He sent someone disguised as a delivery boy over to your house to check up on you and got word that you were sick and locked in your room

He got up and drove to your house in the middle of the night and broke through the front door. He didn't care who got in his way and pushed and punched whoever protested

He got to your room and demanded that you open it

You did and jumped at him, told him you were pregnant and they were keeping you from going back to him and cried

He took you in his arms and was taking you back with him

Your father threatened to call the police and Wooyoung simply said "say hi to chief inspector Jeon from me" leaving the father shocked

You were happy to be back with your lover and were excited about the baby, the same as Wooyoung

Jongho

Probably the strongest man in the whole mafia world

Everyone feared him

He didn't have to say twice for what he wanted because people had heard how he smashed someone's skull open with his bare fists

He had asked you to move in with him and you happily said yes

But when you told your family about your decision they asked you if you were crazy

You didn't listen to them and started packing

They weren't going to let you go to some barbarian

But you weren't listening so they had to do it the hard way

Deep down you were happy to leave because your family had always been abusive and toxic

When you were asked to leave with your suitcases your father grabbed you by your arm and shoved you against the wall

"you bitch, you really think you can disobey me?"

Your mother held you by your hair and slapped you so hard your nose started bleeding

They beat you severely and you had stopped screaming at this point

You thought you were going to die when they left you like this on the kitchen floor

You don't know what got into you but you got on your feet and ran out the front door where you were stopped by Jongho waiting for you beside his car

He saw you and gently pushed you aside and went straight inside the house

He came out after almost 20 minutes, blood splattered on his face and clothes

You were already in shock from the beating that you didn't question him

He got in the car with you, held your face in his hands and said "don't worry, I called an ambulance for them, they just might be okay"

With that your heart sank but you were too shaken to feel sad for them so you just cried

Jongho took you home

#ateez #ateez yandere #mafia ateez #ateez icons #yandere ateez #ateez x reader #ateez au #ateez reactions #ateez hongjoong #ateez seonghwa #ateez yunho #ateez yeosang #ateez san #ateez mingi #ateez wooyoung #ateez jongho #ateez mafia au #ateez scenarios

[dragon-of-dreams]

A Debt to pay

My Masterlist

Pairing: dark!mafia!Bucky x Reader

Warnings: noncon; breading kink; threats, murder, readers parents are dead, reader getting hit across the face, DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT! Seariously, this is some really dark shit with some astonishingly soft sx... No idea how that happened... 18+!!!

No mentions of y/n, and reader is kinda an off because she has a back-story but no physical descriptors are used.

Summary: Your dad dies unexpectedly and you take over running the family cafè. The costs for your daddy’s funeral bring the head of the Barnes family to your doorstep as you struggle to keep up with the payments for a loan you had no idea your dad had taken out with them. You get “offered” an alternative method of payment.

a/n: this was a request by the lovely @oneoftheprettynerds

I hope I did it justice! Thank you for being the most patient person in the world, when Covid, life, exams, life and so on and so forth got in the way of your wish!

Prompt: Can I please get a dark mafia bucky or peter with noncon and breeding kink? With a side of people hitting on reader

 Wordcount: 2,800

 In all seriousness, you had to consider yourself lucky. Most people in this small city had it worse than you. Most didn’t have their own business, certainly not at your age, and most would never have enough money to even dream about that. Your town had the habit of sucking money out of people faster than they could make it and as of late that was also the case for you.

           After your dad had died unexpectedly in a car crash, money had been tight, really tight. You’d never known how fucking expensive funerals were and his drained all the savings you had, just before you’d managed to scrambled together enough for a community college education in business. Now you were left an orphan in your early twenties running a café on only the knowledge you’d learnt from your dad with no prospects of an education. Now you were as stuck as everybody else in town.

           What made matters even worse was the bill you’d gotten two weeks after the funeral. A bill from the one company in town nobody wanted one from. Rich men running successful businesses on the backs of the honest town’s people by draining their money. The mafia. Sharks in suits.

           According to the bill your dad had borrowed money from them 10 years ago. Your best guess was that he had needed it for your mother’s funeral and had never told you. Be that how it may, you didn’t know how to pay that bill. So you asked for time and put in extra hours, keeping the café open til late at night.

           You hated the extra hours. Not only because you got less sleep and had to work so much more and couldn’t afford to hire more employees but also because the later it got the more aggressively people hit on you.

           You hated them. All those men coming in once the sun set, calling you their sweetheart like you were property and grabbing at you and you having to smile and flirt because you needed their tips. Desperately. And yet it seemed to make no difference. There was just no money to be made in this town.

           Bucky Barnes, the head of the Romanov family had given you two months to come up with the next payment, and you knew that you’d end up dead in a ditch with them ceasing your café if you didn’t make it.

           So you smiled and joked with the moms coming in in the mornings and afternoons and flirted and swayed for their husbands at night. When you were in your little apartment above the café after you finally closed you usually cried yourself to sleep. And all throughout the day you would see him. See Bucky fucking Barnes watching you. At first you thought you were imagining it, but he was driving past your café in way too regular intevals, and would even occasionally take up one of your tables. You always sent other staff to serve him, you couldn’t bare to go to him, but his cold blue eyes never left you.

           Over those two month it became abundantly clear that you would never manage to come up with $2,000. And when one of Bucky’s men came in on the Wednesday before the Friday the payment was due, you thought of the 1,200 bucks you’d managed and wanted to cry.

           You knew the man, you’d gone to school with his younger brother Peter who had been a royal pain in your ass, having provided a glimpse of the harassment by the men you now faced every evening. Still you smiled at him: “Steve, hi, what can I get you?” ignoring that you had already flipped your sign to closed and where moping the floors.

           “Hi y/n, a coffee would be great, if you still got some” Steve answered while inspecting your café like he already owned the place.

           “Sure thing!” You tried to sound chipper, but the strain in you voice was audible, as you went behind the counter and got the machine going.

“Sugar? Milk?” you asked, with your back turned to Steve, hoping to draw out the inevitable.

“Just sugar, thanks.” Steve sounded gruff and distant and you knew you’d lost. He probably already knew that you wouldn’t be able to pay. He had accompanied Bucky a bunch of times, never ordered anything, just watched and listened, as Bucky drank or ate. The men had attracted stares. Not only because they were mafia, but because for personified devils, they sure looked like gods.

As you set his coffee before him he asked: “So what can I tell my boss to expect on Friday?” You stared at Steve in his perfectly tailored suit in harsh contrast to the homey but ultimately grimy café surrounding him as you decided on what to say. He looked amazing, and you hated him for it.

Steve raised an eyebrow at you. He was getting impatient. “I… I have a little over half.” You muttered and looked down at your hands, twisted tightly together. “My daddy’s funeral cost so much money, and I” you were interrupted by Steve’s fist hitting the countertop, making you flinch. His rage was pouring out of him so suddenly, taking over everything else. He seethed: “Safe your excuses, little girl. Just make sure to get the money. Bucky isn’t as lenient as I am.” With that, Steve got up from the bar, drained his coffee in one long gulp and left without giving you the chance to beg. You would have. You would do anything now if it meant saving your life. ‘Lenient’, you thought. How was any of this lenient?

           On Friday morning, you didn’t want to get up, much less open the café, but you did both. You put a notice outside that you would close earlier tonight, so Barnes and his henchmen wouldn’t scare off your customers and then you went to work.

           The entire day felt like molasses. Time didn’t move at all, it left you fidgety and nervous. You screwed up more orders than you were willing to admit and then suddenly time jumped and it was 6 p.m. and the sun was setting and you’d closed the café down, pulled all curtains closed except for the front door and were sitting there, waiting. What for, you didn’t know.

           At 6:30 a black limousine came to a stop before your café and Barnes and Peter got out. Which you decided was a good sign. Surley if they were to kill you, they would’ve brought some muscle, not lanky Peter… Bucky Barnes wouldn’t get his hands dirty with you, would he? Or was that what Peter was for? Did he still have to prove himself in the company?

           As Bucky entered you wished it would just end now. To your sheer horror, Peter stayed outside, blocking the door, leaving you all alone with the man you feared most in this world. He looked just like everytime he’d previously entered your café. His suit fit perfectly and you could see the muscle beneath. He was astonishingly beautiful. If he only were so on the inside as well, you mused.

“Hi sweetheart,” Bucky drawled as he approached you, “Steve told me you don’t have my money.” You shrunk in on yourself, but nodded, as Bucky came to tower over you.

“That’s not good, angel, not at all. Why don’t you come out from behind the counter and we sit down and talk about it, huh?”

All you could do was nod. “What happened? Cat got your tongue?” Bucky teased as he grabbed you by the elbow and led you to a boot in the corner of the café, way out of view from the front door. His touch was startingly kind. You had prepared for pain, but were met with kind support. Your brow furrowed.

“I…” You looked up at him. “I g got $1,300. I know that’s not enough, but”

“Shh.” Bucky murmured and pushed you down onto the bench, took of his suit jacket, hung it carefully over a nearby chair and then caged you in by sitting at your side. You were trapped and you were shaking with fear.

Bucky was so much taller than you and even through his perfectly tailored black dressshirt you could see his muscles bulging. You couldn’t decide weather you wanted to start sobbing into his chest or punch him in the stomach. “Steve already told me all about that, angel, don’t worry, I already came up with a new payment plan.”

“You’re not mad?” you question, to terrified to be hopeful.

“Well, I am not thrilled, but I’ve always had a softspot for this place. My pa used to take me when I was little. I watched you grow up, you know?”

Hope bloomed like desert rose in your heart. He knew you! He had a connection to you! That surely meant he wouldn’t kill you. You’d figure out the money. Suddenly you were certain that you could do it.

“really? That’s – I never knew…” Your voice was fluttering with hope.

“Well, it’s a small town.” Bucky’s voice was calm and soothing. You almost forgot that you were squished between him and the wall.

“And with me seeing you grow up, and seeing all the other women in town I decided that you would give me an heir to take here. To watch people with, so he too could choose his wife. An heir for me and forgiveness for your debt and a happy home life for you.” Your world stopped spinning. It screeched to a halt.

“What? No, Bucky, I…” Bucky wrapped an arm around your shoulders, pulled you close. The arm was tight across you back and stole your words from you as fear spread from every spot he touched throughout your entire body.

“You’re a hard worker, you have a drive for better and higher things. I like that. It’ll make you a diligant mother, you know angel? And that is what I need. A good mother to the boy who will inherit this town, don’t you agree?”

You sit there frozen, unable to reply. Your brain is going a thousand miles an hour trying to find a way, any way, to get away, but before you can do anything Bucky grabs your right hand and presses it to his crotch. He’s hard. The calm demeanour falls off him suddenly as he growls: “Here is how this will go, angel,” he starts to move your hand up and down his crotch, “I will let go of your hand and you will undo my pants and get me ready and then I will have that little pussy of yours on this table. I mean it ain’t romantic, but once you are my little wife I’ll make up for that, sweetheart.”

You swallow hard, press your eyes closed and feel him move his hand over the fine cotton of his suit and his hard length underneath, then you force yourself to nod. It’s a jerking, hurtful motion, but Bucky released you hand, as he leans back on the bench, spreading his legs, opening himself up to you.

You want to thrash out, but instead you shaking hands wander to his belt. “Go on, now. we ain’t got all night, darling.” You are tearing up, but do as you’re told. You lean slightly over him and undo his belt first, then his pants. His cock strains against his boxer briefs and you gulp. Bucky lifts his hips and you push his pants and underwear down.

His cock is beautiful. Long and thick and veined and you can’t help but press your thighs together at the sight. Bucky notices and smirks down at you. “Now that’s a good girl. Keep it up and I make sure you enjoy yourself!” he whispers in your ear as he guides your hands to his dick.

As you jerk him, you realize that you underestimated his size. Your fucked. Literally. There is no way you’re gonna enjoy this. Bucky shoves his left hand up your skirt suddenly and you freeze until he clears his throat and startles you back into action, while his fingers start exloring your sex.

“You know,” Bucky explains, “I find it helps ladies to go down on a guy before actually fucking. Gets them nice and ready, you know?” One of his fingers slides into your tight chanel, “But with you it seems we don’t need that. The sight of my cock alone made you cream. I knew there was something special about you!” He grins and removes his hand. “We might still have to work on your handjob skills though…” he muses, grips your hand and removes it form his dick, as he gets up.

You shrink back but he pulls you out after him. Finally, blessedly, your panic response sets in any you try to struggle, but Bucky’s hold on your arm tightens painfully and his left hand hits you across the face before you even see it coming and it makes your world spin. “Stop it, now!” Bucky barks at you and you freeze. Your feeble attempts forgotten as Bucky lifts you onto the table and rips your panties off. You start sobbing as he bends your right leg to your shoulder and situates himself.

“Sssh,” he cooes at you softly, “I’ll make it better, baby, just one moment.” His suddenly warm voice lulls you into a false sense of security as you stare into his deep blue eyes. They are bewitching you, and you only feel him push in when it’s too late.

He sheethes himself in one agonizingly long stroke. The pain breaks you out of your reverie, you arch your back and groan. It hurts! It hurts so much, and yet you want more, so much more. “Bucky!” you plead, you sob, you whine and once more there it is, the calm voice of the devil now owning your life, rolling in like the tide washing over you, calming you. “I know my sweet pet, I know, just relax now. Just breathe.” And you do. You can’t help yourself.

Bucky lets out a pained moan as you settle around him, and once your clenched eyes flutter back open, once your back comes back down from its painful arch, the god above you starts to move. Every drag and push is better than the last. He hits home every time. His dick lights up a pathway to your pleasure, with every sharp, hard, relentlessy painful thrust, in time with his pubic hair grinding against your clit. A particularly hard thrust shifts his cock so it hits your cervix and you scream with pain and pleasure. Your arms reach up, your hands burying themselves in his thick hair as Bucky leans in closer to you, bending you in half on that table, and nuzzles at your neck as he starts to hammer into you. Every thrust is pure bliss. You want to feel ashamed, you want to push him away, but all you can feel is the drag and glide of his cock, his pelvis against your clit, his tip hitting your cervix. You are on fire and the coil in your core is ready to explode. The intensity of Bucky’s thrusts never wavers, even as you feel him swell even further as his balls draw up and that tiny change breaks you, your orgasm explodes and you cry out in ecstatic pleasure, just as Bucky falters and shoots his cum in thick long strokes into you. His warmth joing yours as he lazily pumps to stop within you.

You only come back to yourself as Bucky pulls out slowly and you can feel your combined, cooling spend trickle down your legs. He eases your leg back down and kisses you softly as you start crying. “Ssh, darling, you’re alright. You’re done. Your debt is paid and you’ll be my wife in no time, the mother to my heir. You did so good, angel!” He coos sweet nothing at you until you can control your crying enough to speak.

“Bucky, I’m not on anything! What if it really takes?” you whimper, emerging from the fantasy he built up in your head.

“That is rather the point!” He snaps harshly. The calm voice gone as quickly as it emerged. You shiver as you realize the extent of what he said before. He really meant it all… Bucky pulls up his pants. “Pack up your things, lovely, tomorrow I’ll pick you up and you are moving in with me, so I can keep an eye on you!” With that Bucky pulls on his suit jacket and heads for the door, as you struggle to sit up, shaking and crying.

At the door Bucky looks back at you, his voice a lot calmer again: “I’m real happy about our new business arrangement as it ensures you will be staying with me, little girl. If only your daddy would have agreed to let me have you, his car wouldn’t have had to end up wrapped around a tree so your little college fund would go away. Sleep tight now, Mama, and I’ll see you tomorrow.”

#dark!Bucky Barnes #dark Bucky #dark!Bucky #Bucky x reader #dark!Bucky x reader #marvel #fanfiction #fic #fanfic #prompt #captain america #the winter soldier #cafe au

[phati-sari]

Arshi FF: Tere Bin - Chapter 8

Read from the beginning | Chapter 7

Chapter 8: Ranjha (listen while reading)

Khushi

“What was he doing here?”

Khushi answered without turning, her head resting on the window sill as she studied the moon. “I don’t know.”

It’d taken a long time to escape to the room she shared with her sister after they’d first stepped through the doors. First, Amma had asked about the hospital visit, making Khushi recite everything the Doctor Sahib had said while Bua-ji interrupted often to ask questions. Babu-ji had soon taken over, asking to see the paperwork Khushi had collected and asking a few questions of his own. Still full from the gol gappe, Khushi had nibbled on some puri under Jiji’s watchful gaze while the family considered the payment plan the clinic had laid out.

Luckily, no one had asked exactly how she’d gotten home.

“You were in his car, Khushi.” Jiji came to stand next to her, her tone coloured with disapproval.

“The auto broke down. He was driving past.”

“He, of all the people in Lucknow and Delhi, just happened to be driving by? At the exact moment your auto broke down?”

An odd defensiveness flared in her chest, words popping out of her mouth before she’d thought them through.

“What can I say, Jiji? My phone’s battery was dead, it was dark. He offered to drop me home.”

Jiji reached out to touch her shoulder. “Did he fight with you again?”

No, he bought me gol gappe.

“No more than usual,” Khushi tried to smile at her sister. “I’m fine. Really. He drove me home. That’s all.”

Though she looked unconvinced, Jiji stepped away with a nod to ready herself for bed. Khushi waited until she was alone to snatch her bag from where it hung on a hook. Her searching fingers found the business card he’d offered.

“Well, it’s just that you like arguing so much, and we argue so often … I think we should keep in touch.”

At the time, she’d been so startled that she’d simply taken the card and slid from the car without answering. Jiji, fortunately, had been too busy scowling at him through the windows to notice as she’d slipped it into her bag.

The card was thick, the surface almost velvety to the touch. It sported a bright red logo in the top corner and announced his name in crisp black letters — ARNAV SINGH RAIZADA. Khushi shook her head to clear the unbidden memory of correcting his name on hundreds of letters.

The writing on the card included a number she recognised for the reception desk at the head offices and an email address that his managers monitored. But he’d scrawled another number untidily along one side with a black pen.

His personal number, Khushi realised with a jolt.

It felt strangely intimate, though logic reminded her that she’d had the same number saved in her phone before he’d broken it on the storeroom floor.

Why is he still in Lucknow?

On the heels of this thought came another: Why should I care?!

Her mind was suddenly awhirl with memories — raised voices and shouted words, a fall from his window, the broken door to the storeroom. His airs about money and power. The terror of the guesthouse.

Khushi ripped the business card in half, her breath coming in rapid pants, and then tore it into even smaller pieces. Tears stung in her eyes. She scrunched the pieces into her palm as Jiji returned to the room.

“Make sure you wake up early tomorrow,” her sister draped her towel near the window. “We’re going to the temple.”

“Okay.”

Waiting until Jiji was occupied with something in the cupboard, Khushi returned the ruined card to her bag. In the bathroom, she brushed her teeth and washed her face before studying her reflection. Her pulse was a chaotic drumbeat in her body, her thoughts a wild tangle. And underneath it all was something that thrilled and scared her at the same time, something that had followed her to Lucknow.

                                    #####

“Everything leads back to him,” Jiji had groaned, rolling on her side on the bed they shared. “Just go to sleep quietly.”

It had been a week since they’d returned to Lucknow, and Khushi had been comparing the price of potatoes between Lucknow and Delhi. Or at least, that was how the conversation had started. She couldn’t remember how they’d gotten to talking about that Laad Governor.

“You’re right Jiji. We’re in Lucknow now and we’ll soon forget that we ever went to Delhi. Or that we met such cruel, haughty people. Although … Anjali-ji had such sweetness in her. It’s a shame that we had to leave without saying goodbye to her. At least we met one nice person in Delhi. Oh … and Nani-ji. Maybe two nice people. And Aakash-ji, I suppose, though —”

“— Khushi! Are you going to count out every member of his family? Your mind is like a compass that’s always stuck on him!”

“And why wouldn’t it be?” Khushi had asked hotly. “He sent me there to do some meaningless task, knowing the place was about to collapse.”

“I know. You’ll never have to see him again, Khushi. You resigned from that awful job, you gave him an earful, and now you’re here and he’s there.”

The words should have elated her, but they only left her feeling strangely hollow.

                                    #####

That hollowness sat heavily inside her as Khushi joined her sister in their bed a few minutes later, sliding between the covers with a sigh.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Jiji’s voice was soft in the dimness.

“Yes.”

“You barely ate dinner.”

“I’m not hungry.”

A short silence, in which Khushi’s mind unhelpfully replayed the way she’d fallen into his arms yet again.

Oh Devi Maiyya, couldn’t you find another place to make me slip? You mustn’t have liked the offering I left you this morning.

“I’m glad we came back to Babu-ji,” Jiji said softly. “I can’t imagine being away from home at a time like this.”

“The doctors said that as long as he rests properly and takes his medicines, there’s nothing to worry about.”

“He isn’t resting nearly enough, even with both of us at the shop.”

Khushi nodded her agreement, “He’s worried about the bills.”

“Bua-ji and Amma are talking about selling some jewellery. I thought I’d give them my bangles.”

“I have bangles we can sell too.”

It took a while for Jiji’s breathing to fall into the deep, slow rhythm of sleep. Khushi lay awake, her thoughts chasing each other in ever-tightening spirals.

The night of the photoshoot. The softness of her pallu as it slipped. The scorch of his gaze as it roved over her body and left her feeling singed. The electricity between them on Teej, every touch a bolt of lightning. The weight of him pressing into her in the storeroom.

She flushed, skin prickling and warmth blooming in secret places.

Stop it, Khushi. A handful of gol gappe is all it takes for you to forget his cruelty?

She turned onto her side with a huff. Sometimes it felt as though her life had been split into Before and After, as though falling at the fashion show had created an entirely new Khushi Kumari Gupta. A Khushi who was strangely compelled towards him, a Khushi who’d come dangerously close to swooning in his arms today. A Khushi who wanted something she had no name for.

“I didn’t know the situation at the guesthouse was that bad!”

“Do you really think I would’ve sent you there if I’d known? Is that what you think of me?”

For the first time, she allowed herself to entertain the idea that he hadn’t sent her there on purpose.

So what if he hadn’t? I was still trapped there for an entire day. He was wrong.

But the thought was impossible to dislodge now that it’d wormed into her mind. Having assumed he’d wanted to argue every time he’d approached her, she now considered whether he might have been trying to explain. She saw their interactions in a new light. The sweets, the cheque.

Did he feel guilty? Was he trying to say sorry?

She eventually fell into an uneasy sleep, tormented in her dreams by his eyes, his voice, the memory of his touch. She woke just before dawn, breathless and damp with sweat, the sheets tangled with her legs. Flinging them off, Khushi sat up in bed. Her sister made a questioning noise.

“Sleep, Jiji. It’s not time to wake up yet.”

A nameless storm raged in her chest, making it hard to breathe. She squeezed her eyes shut.

I should hate him.

A lurch in her tummy.

But I don’t.

Padding slowly over to her bag, she fished out the pieces of the business card one by one. There was a roll of tape amongst the paper and pens scattered on the table in the corner. Khushi glanced back at her sister as she sat. It took a few minutes to line up the jagged edges, to press the tape along them with trembling fingers until she could read his name again.

He’d set down a challenge. She wouldn’t back down.

    ********

Thanks for reading :) I know some of you may be disappointed with the level of introspection in this chapter and where I chose to end it. Tere Bin is Arnav’s story, one where he has to work out what he wants and how to get it while Khushi is in Lucknow. While I intend to dip into Khushi’s point of view where the story demands it (and I feel that her presence greatly improved Chapters 6 and 7), it will focus heavily on Arnav. I am not intentionally writing something to annoy or disappoint readers. I’m trying to do something very specific with this story, and like all experiments, I’m learning as I go :) 

#ipkknd #iss pyaar ko kya naam doon #ff: tere bin #iwrotethis #arshi ff #arshi #ipkknd ff #mine

[maddiwrites]

Secret Lives (Part 2)

Paring: JJ Maybank x reader 

Summary: You and JJ never got along so your friends trap the two of you on a boat in the middle of the marsh to work it out. Only it doesn’t go as planned. (Part 2)

Note: I couldn’t be happier with the feedback I am getting from Part 1!! Thank you guys so much for helping me out and hanging on there with me as I figure all of this out! I’m so grateful for all the comments and messages and I am ready every single one! Now I saw a couple people asking to be a part of a tag list...so if someone could tell me how to set one of them up I would be more than happy to lol. I will tag the two people I’ve seen who asked to be tagged! But yeah, am I supposed to set something up for a tag list or do people just message me if they want to be tagged in my stuff? Someone let me know!! 

Word Count: 5.6k

Warnings: Language, angst, small parts of child abuse. 

Part 1

It’s been about two weeks since you’ve seen or talked to the Pogues. Everyday felt ten hours longer and the air felt thinner. You missed your friends. You missed surfing with John B, you missed debating about the accuracy of medical TV shows with Pope, you missed sleepovers with Kie, and yes, you even missed JJ. 

As much as you hated yourself for it, you knew you did the right thing. Staying with the Pogues would have caused more harm than good. It was clear as day that you and JJ would never get along because he didn’t like you and you weren’t going to stand around and be insulted by a guy you still can’t help but think about every single day. 

Every night, you pictured the hatred behind JJ’s blue eyes when he spoke about you being nothing but a spoiled brat who didn’t deserve his trust or your friendship with the other Pogues. Each word felt like an individual stab to the heart. You were use to people not liking you. The girls at your school hated you for not giving them the time of day, the boys threw hurtful remarks at you all the time after you rejected them. But they never hurt as much JJ’s. Because they didn’t come from the guy you loved. 

It didn’t matter how much JJ hated you. You couldn’t help but fall for his sparkling blue eyes, tan skin, and fluffy blonde hair. You swooned every time JJ laughed and smiled because you loved seeing him happy. You were turned on every time JJ stood up for one of your friends, threatening to fight whoever it was that was bothering them, even if it was an uptight Kook. You were silently heartbroken every time JJ told you and his friends about his sexcapade from the previous night.  You were concerned and personally infuriated when JJ would come to the Chateau with new sets of bruises without telling you where they came from because that little voice inside your head told you exactly where they were from. 

You loved him, and you hated that you loved him. 

But this was for the best. At least thats what you told yourself.

Kie didn’t agree though. She found you in your room the next day, ready to apologize for stranding you on a boat with JJ, but it just ended in another screaming match when you told her what happened. 

“So just like that? You’re gonna leave?” She yelled. 

“I can’t do it anymore, Kie! He doesn’t want me there, and I am so sick and tired of trying to get him to like me.”

“What about John B and Pope? What about me? You’re our friend too!”

“We can still hangout -”

“Without JJ? That’s so unfair!”

“He hates me, Kie! How would you like it if I forced you to hang out with Sarah Cameron, huh?”

“That’s not the same.”

“Its the exact fucking same, and you know it!”

Kie ended up storming out of your room, neither one of you feeling any sort of peace or satisfaction with your decision. You haven’t talked to her since, and you contemplated calling her every day. 

But you never do.

The alarm you set on your phone blared in your ear from the pillow next to your head - a reminder that you needed to leave to pick up your father. You slapped the touch screen of your phone until the stupid alarm turned off. The last place you wanted to be was anywhere outside of your room. The thought of being with you father, the man you continued to blame for all your problems, filled you with self-hatred. You hated how easily he was able to manipulate you to help him, making you and your mother out to be the bad guys. He used Andrew’s wealth as a guilt trip for you, saying that since you didn’t do anything to deserve his money, the least you could do was help him out because you and your mother left him with absolutely nothing. And you fall for it. You fall for it every single time because he says you use to be daddy’s little girl - that he had big plans for the two of you when you were old enough to learn life’s pleasures. Little did you know his biggest life pleasures had always been drugs, alcohol, and gambling.

You tied your hair up in a messy bun and bounced down the stairs. Swiftly, grabbing the car keys to your new Mercedes Andrew bought you for your sixteenth birthday, you sped walked past your little sister who tried showing you a new trick that she taught your maltese puppy.

“Look, Y/N/N!”

“Not now, Gracie,” You huffed. 

As you drove through the Cut, you couldn’t help but keep a lookout for your Pogues.  You tried not to slam on the brakes every time you caught a glimpse of blonde hair or swerve when you saw a guy John B’s height carrying a surfboard. 

You honked your horn twice when you pulled up to your dad’s shitty apartment. After no longer being able to pay his mortgage after your mom left him, he had no choice but to move into the cheapest apartment in OBX. He always tried telling you that was your fault too. 

A few minutes later, he walked out, looking like he hasn’t showered in days or knows how to change his socks.

He slid into the passenger seat with a grunt, barely passing you a second glance. “You’re late.” He said. 

You stayed quiet, knowing that anything you said would only piss him off even more since you weren’t in the mood to put up with his antics.

You drove him to his drug dealer’s house, parking outside of the one story home that looked like it was rotting from the inside out. Your dad made you take him here a couple times. Every time you stayed in the car. But today, your father had something different planned.

“Come on,” He said.

“What?” You looked at him with your brows pinched together in confusion. 

“I need you inside.”

“No, no, no, no. That wasn’t the deal.”

“Well it is now, so let’s go.” His voice was stern through his clenched teeth, his eyes unblinking. You stared at him for a long second, debating whether fighting with him was worth it. 

Without another word, you reluctantly opened your door and followed your dad into the house. It smelled like B.O and marijuanna, just like how you pictured a frat house would. Pots, pans, and plates were filled to the brim of the sink. A moldy meal that looked a couple days old sat at the round table tucked in the corner. 

Your dad lead you into the living room where three other men were sitting. Well two men and one boy you recognized immediately. You swallowed your nerves as they all turned to look at your dad, then you.

“What’d you bring me, today, Jerry?” The guy with the long black hair tied in a low bun looked at you like you were fresh meat. 

You took a small step closer to your dad, ironically looking at him for some kind of protection. You didn’t trust any of these men in this room. You didn’t care if they were your father’s friends. They were men who made poor life choices and you didn’t know how far they could take it.

You looked over at Rafe Cameron, who compared to these guys, looked like a lost kid in a carnival. He was sporting a black eye and jaw. He looked both shocked and scared to see you here, probably worried that you would torment his reputation by letting everyone know how he really spends his weekdays when he’s not partying on his daddy’s boat. Little did he know, he had just enough blackmail to use against you too. 

“This is my daughter, Y/N,” Your dad introduced you. “Y/N, this is Barry.”

Barry looked you up and down and smirked. “You look like you a part of Country Club’s world.” By the way he was pointing his thumb back at the Kook, you figured that was his nickname for Rafe.

“She is,” Your father answered for you. “Remember when you said you didn’t trust me to come up with enough money to pay you back for my blow? This is proof that I got it. That I’ll always have it.”

Bile rose up your throat and your heart twisted in your chest. Is this how your dad thought of you? An open wallet? 

Of course it is, you thought. 

Barry nodded, impressed that someone like you came from a man like your father. “Well, take a seat. Can I offer you anything? Beer? Soda? Maybe a whiff?” He pointed to the white line on his clear coffee table.

“No. Thank you.” You said slowly before looking up at your father. “I didn’t bring any cash...”

“Don’t worry sweetheart. I paid out this time - used the check you sent me for my water bill. But now Barry knows he can trust me with his shit - that I wasn’t lying about you.”

“Maybe you can help Country Club pass my shit around. You’ll get a nice discount if you do...and maybe something else,” Barry looked at you suggestively. 

“Don’t scare her off, dude, she just got here.” The other man said. He extended his arm out for you to shake his hand. “I’m Luke Maybank.”

In that moment, it felt like the whole world stopped turning. You stared at the man in front of you, drinking in all his features and matching them to JJ’s. Same blue eyes, sharp jaw line, and a perfect nose. You looked down at his hand as you hesitantly shook it. Dirty, dry, scuffed. You remembered the days and nights that JJ would limp into the Chateau. He would blame it on the Kooks but the details in his story never stuck, like he couldn’t remember them with each person he told.

“Maybank?” You repeated.

“Yeah,” He narrowed his eyes. “Do I know you?”

“I was friends with your son.” Just like that, you went from being nervous to being angry. You hated this man more than you’re own father. JJ didn’t deserve the beatings and the abuse from the man in front of you. He was nothing but a deadbeat dad who didn’t know how good his son really was to him. 

“I would have remembered a pretty face like yours.”

“He never brought me around your house,” You looked at Luke Maybank from his shoes to his face. He was wearing jeans with dirt stains on them, a fitted white tank underneath a grey and blue flannel that was ripped by the cuffs around his wrists. The bags under his eyes were as dark as the bruise on Rafe’s face and his chin was in need of a shave. “Wonder why.” You couldn’t stop the sarcasm that dripped from your tongue.

You wished you could say more, or spit in his face, or kick him where it hurts. You weren’t afraid of what would happen to you, but how he would take it out on JJ if you did.

You looked up at your dad. “I’ll wait in the car.”

You quickly walked out of the house, immediately taking in a deep breath of fresh air. Before you could hide away in the front seat of your car, Rafe called out for you to stop.

You turned, only because you didn’t know what he wanted.

“What?” You said.

“Tell your boys this isn’t over. They’re not going to get away with -”

“I’m sorry. What are you talking about?”

“The Pogues. They sunk Topper’s 2020 Malibu, 24-MXC.”

At least now you have an idea as to where his bruises came from. “Is that suppose to mean something to me?”

Rafe smirked. “I forgot. You’re not a natural born Kook.”

“And yet you and I are standing in the same douchebag’s yard. What a coincidence.”

Rafe sneered at you. If this were a cartoon, steam would be coming out of his ears. “Just tell them.”

When Rafe turned to walk back into Barry’s home, you called out to him. “How do you know it was them?” Rafe turned around. “What’s your proof?” He didn’t answer immediately, and you watched him wrack his brain for some bullshit lie, which gave you all the answers you needed. “I’m guessing there isn’t any but you think it was them because you gave them a good reason to sink Topper’s 2020 Mailbu, 24-MXC. A boat I know is the finest wake setter and number one in luxury, quality, and performance.” The only reason you knew that was because JJ would say it every time Topper and Sarah would cruise by you on the HMS Pogue, and the look on Rafe’s face made it worth every second having to listen to JJ repeat that almost every week.

If Rafe wanted to respond, he couldn’t, because your dad was now walking towards you with a mean mug on his face.

Before you could say anything, the back of your dad’s hand whipped you across the face. His wedding ring, the one he refused to take off for eighteen years, caught on the corner of your mouth, splitting your bottom lip.

Rafe jumped back, startled, and you bit back a scream. Your thumb skimmed over your lip, blood coating your finger. 

“Don’t embarrass me like that again. Got it?” You dad glared down at you.

“Sir...” Rafe’s voice shook with unease. If you weren’t silently shaking with shame, you would have been surprised that Rafe even said anything at all. 

“Trust me, kid. You don’t wanna get in between a quarrel between a dad and their kid,” Luke Maybank smirked as he made his way to his own truck that was parked in front of yours. 

You glared at the back window of the car, now shaking with both shame and anger. You knew there was nothing else you could do to change the way Luke treated his son. You knew you couldn’t stop him from hurting JJ. 

But it shouldn’t matter. Because JJ wasn’t your problem anymore.

                                                  ***************

The next morning your mom made you run her errands for her. A trip to the Cleaners to pick up Andrew’s suits, the pet store for dog food and treats, and lastly to Heyward's because, according to Gracie, he sells the best hot dogs she’s ever had. 

You were trembling with nerves as you stalked through the aisles. You kept your head down, focusing on finding everything on your mother’s list as quickly as possible so you could get the hell out of there. When you went to check out, Mr. Heyward studied you but didn’t say anything. Lord knows what Pope told him. You wouldn’t be surprised if he charged you extra just to make a point. 

“Thank you,” You said as he handed you the brown paper bag. 

He nodded silently. 

As you walked out of the store, you’re faced with three out of your four friends that you dreaded seeing. They were huddled together, whispering and bickering about something. When they heard the bell above the door chime, they all looked up at you. The four of you stood there like you had all just gone brain dead. Your mouth dried up and you forgot how to speak. 

Pope looked surprised to see you, like a ghost he wasn’t expecting to see. Kie looked glum, and you remembered your last conversation. You didn’t know what you were now. You couldn’t read JJ’s expression. His eyes are casted down on your face. He was staring at your lips. Your beautiful soft pink lips he’s dreamt about kissing for years. Now they were tainted and he was dying to know how, so he could wrap his hands around that bastard’s neck and set him straight. 

“Hi...” You said softly. You didn’t know what else to say. 

No one else had a chance to speak because the piercing noise of a police siren cut through the awkward tension. Officer Shoupe got out of his car and started approaching Pope of all people. 

"Morning Officer,” Pope said nervously.

Shoupe acted like he didn’t hear him. “I have an arrest warrant for felony of destruction of property.”

You instantly thought back to what Rafe said to you yesterday. Topper’s boat. How they’re not going to get away with it. 

You watched Shoupe with wide eyes as he told Pope to put his hands up. “Hands where I can see them.” Kie tried blocking Shoupe from getting any closer to Pope. “Young lady, out of my way.”

Heyward walked out of his shop when he heard the commotion. “You arresting my boy?”

Shoupe didn’t answer and forcefully pulled Pope’s hands behind his back. 

“Be careful!” Kie screamed at him. 

Everyone started screaming at Shoupe, trying to get him away from the boy who didn’t deserve this. Pope had a future ahead of him. One that didn’t involve relying on his parents money to get. He was a hard worker, stayed out of trouble, and even had a scholarship interview in a couple weeks that will be his one way ticket off this island. He couldn’t go to jail. It would ruin him. 

Your head started ringing as the people in front of you moved in slow motion. Rafe’s words repeated in your head - more importantly the words he didn’t say. He hesitated when you asked how they knew it was your friends. Because he didn’t know for sure. 

“Stop!” You screamed louder than anyone else, causing everyone to pause in their movements. Your friends looked at you with wide eyes and Shoupe narrowed his in suspicion. “Pope didn’t do it.” You couldn’t stop yourself from doing what you were about to do, but you knew it was better than Pope getting pushed down to the station. “I did it.”

“Y/N...” JJ started to say softly, but you cut him off. 

“You’re here for the Thornton’s sunken boat, right?” You continued, knowing that if you proved with some details that you were there, Shoupe would have no choice but to take you instead of Pope. “Pope didn’t do it. He wasn’t even with me when I did it.”

Shoupe shook his head. “Y/N, you don’t want to cover for -”

“I’m not covering. I was sick and tired of Topper and his friends always taking advantage of my friends, who do nothing but work their asses off to make sure families like mine can prop their perfectly painted toes up on some beach chairs and do nothing but lay in the sun all day. So I hit Topper where it hurt with something so replaceable as a boat because I know money is all that matters to that family.”

“Y/N, what the hell are you doing?” JJ said through clenched teeth. 

You shrugged. “What? I’m just telling the truth.” You took a deep breath and glanced at JJ one last time before focusing back on Shoupe. “You know my dad, Shoupe. And you know I’m not talking about Andrew. I mean, my real dad.” 

You tried to act like you didn’t just spill your biggest secret to really sell your story. You pretended like the eyes of all your friends weren’t burning holes in your head. 

Shoupe used to be the officer that would frequently visit your home when you lived with your dad. Neighbors would call the cops on your family a lot because the screaming got to be too much. Without your mom pressing charges, there was nothing he could do. 

“Yeah. Yeah, I know your dad,” Shoupe said softly, like he felt sorry for you that he knew exactly what you were talking about. 

“I guess I inherited his temper.”

“What?” Kie’s voice broke and tears started cascading down her cheeks. You forced yourself not to look at her. 

“I know you don’t have any proof that Pope did it. There’s no cameras posted around the Thornton’s dock.” You knew that because Sarah made you hang out with their friends a couple of times on that boat. “And there were no witnesses.” You were banking on Rafe’s reaction for this one. “So I’m guessing the Thornton’s, most likely the Mrs., paid you or something to make the arrest. But I don’t think the Sheriff would appreciate you taking someone who you have no evidence against in instead of someone confessing to the crime right to your face.”

You didn’t blink when you stared Officer Shoupe down, challenging him to go against you and fight his way to Pope. But both of you knew he couldn’t take Pope after this. 

“Is this true?” Shoupe looked at Pope.

“Yes -”

“Not you! I’m asking Pope,” Shoupe snapped, glaring at you. You knew you just ruined his entire day. 

Pope looked at you for some kind of answer. You tried subtly nodding your head, telling him it’s okay to agree. You wanted him to say it was true. 

You didn’t know what was coming next for you, but you knew you could handle it. You didn’t know if Pope could.

“Yes, sir,” Pope said.

JJ felt like he was punched in the gut. He didn’t want Pope to go to jail, but he sure as hell didn’t want you going there either. He wanted to tell you he was sorry, that he was an idiot, that he tried not to love you but failed. He knew he treated you like shit and he pushed you away. Yet here you were, still taking bullets for each of them. 

Shoupe nodded and began reading your Miranda Rights. You handed Heyward your groceries and said, “I’ll have someone pick these up.”

“Wait!” JJ tried calling out to you as Shoupe helped you into the back seat of his car. “Wait! No!”

You kept your head down as Shoupe drove away, only looking up when you knew you were at least a mile away from your friends. 

As Shoupe closed the door to a room where you were to wait to be interrogated, you smiled to yourself. Your mom was going to be pissed, you were about to get in a shit load of trouble, and the Pogues still may never talk to you again, but you knew you just saved Pope’s entire future - the one he deserved more than anything. 

And you were proud of yourself for that.

                                                   ***************

Of course Mrs. Thornton didn’t want you to go to jail. She wanted about $30,000 of restitution money to make up for it. You rolled your eyes when you heard that. All that family cares about is money. You knew she probably didn’t even care about the boat in the first place. 

Your mom screamed at you the entire ride back to your house. She took your phone and TV away and threatened to homeschool you for the next school year. Your mom was strict but her punishments never lasted long. She usually caved somewhere in the first week. You think its because she thinks your childhood was punishment enough and that behavior like this was to be expected because of it. You tried not to get that mentality stuck in your head, but sometimes you could get yourself into some trouble here and there. 

Another part of your punishment was to do the yard work around the house. Andrew had already written you a list by the time your mom forced you to wake up at 6 a.m.

You couldn’t even be mad at the punishment. Mulching the yard was the least you could do. Andrew even planned on paying the Thornton’s back if you worked for him for free the rest of the summer. 

It was about mid morning when a car pulled up your driveway. You felt like the wind was just knocked out of you when you noticed the junky Volkswagen van park. 

JJ hopped out of the Twinkie and walked in your direction. You didn’t know what to do. Were you supposed to say hi and pretend like nothing ever happened between you two? Would you go back to bickering? You looked down at your body and was mortified at what you were wearing. Although it was only some black leggings and a white tank top, you were covered in dirt and sweat, and reeked of cow manure, which you knew was what mulch was made out of. 

You tried pushing away the butterflies that swarmed your stomach when JJ stood next to you. You turned to look at him, unsure of what to say. You hated that he had this effect on you. Usually you were quick witted and were able force any kind of small talk. I mean, you were a Kook now after all. But this felt different. You didn’t want to have small talk with JJ. You wanted to really know him. His past, his now, his future. You didn’t want to be tongue tied. 

“Hey,” He said softly.

“Hi,” You wiped the sweat off your forehead with the back of your gloved hand. You glanced back at the van, waiting for one of your other friends to appear. “What are you doing here?”

“You weren't answering your phone and I got worried,” JJ sheepishly tucked his hand in his pockets and had a hard time of meeting your eyes. 

Ever since you mentioned a dad with a bad temper, JJ couldn’t stop thinking the worst for you. When you weren’t answering your phone, he wondered if he had done something to hurt you. The thought made him so sick with anxiety, he drove to your house to make sure you were all right.

“Yeah, my mom took my phone away. Turns out she doesn’t like it when her daughter gets arrested.” You tried to joke. “Why were you worried?”

JJ finally looked at you again. “What happened to your lip?”

You coughed from the unexpected question. You reactively bit your bottom lip and looked away. “I uh, fell on Sarah’s boat the other day.”

“Y/N...” JJ said softly and touched your elbow to make you look at him. 

“What, JJ?” You snapped, turning to look at him with a glare. He probably put two and two together the second you mentioned your dad yesterday in front of him. Just like you did when you met Luke Maybank. You hated that you had this in common with the blonde Pogue, but you also knew he could be someone you could confide in, which is something you never had. “Why do you care? Just because you know about my dad now doesn’t make us friends.”

“I was wrong, okay? I was wrong about you, Y/N.”

You scoffed, “I have an asshole for a dad, JJ. Nothing else has changed.”

“I was the biggest dick to you. You tried every day to be my friend and I pushed you away. And I’m sorry. The truth is, I don’t like change and I don’t trust people because my dad -” JJ paused and looked away towards the road, unable to meet your eyes. 

“Because your dad’s just like my dad,” You said, making his head snap back to you. “I met your dad the other. It turns out they have the same drug dealer.”

“You met my dad?” JJ’s eyes went wide.

“Yeah.”

“Did you...”

“I didn’t say anything other than how we use to be friends. But trust me, there was a hell of a lot more I wanted to say.”

JJ nodded and rubbed the back of his neck. “Listen, you were right. I didn’t take the chance to get to know you because I was afraid that I would like you a lot more than I wanted to, and then you would realize you were too good for us...for me. So I pushed you away. I tried hating you so you would hate me too. But truth is, I never hated you. I could never hate you. You’re smart, funny, kind, beautiful...” Your eyes flickered up to meet his and you noticed a pink hue running up his neck, which probably matched the one on your cheeks. “I’ve always thought that. And I don’t care about where you came from. You could have been born and raised a Kook or you could have been homeless your entire life. Nothing could ever change my opinion of you. I like you, Y/N. And I miss you. The Pogues miss you and they hate me and I hate me too because I drove you away. And I’m so sorry.”

You couldn’t tell if this was a dream or not, but you weren’t going to mess this up, even if it was a dream. Because JJ was standing in front of you, telling you he missed you and that he wanted you back with him and his friends, and you’d be a fool not to take him up on that because you missed them too and you were miserable without them.

“I miss you too, JJ.”

JJ smile grew wide at your words and for a second, you thought he was going to jump up and down and cheer. “Really? You don’t hate me?”

You shook your head. “I never hated you, JJ. I never could.”

“You should.”

“No. I shouldn’t. I get why you didn’t want me around. I’m a Kook now and I was being shady when I tried hiding my dad from the rest of you. You were just protecting your friends.”

“Turned out they weren’t the ones who needed protecting,” JJ said softly.

You shook your head. “I don’t need protecting.”

“Why do you still see him if you live here now?”

“It’s complicated.”

JJ reluctantly nodded. He hated that this was a part of your life he couldn't exert himself into just yet. He had to earn that. He needed you to trust him first before you let him into such a vulnerable part of your life. But he understood that. He understood that more than anybody. 

But he was going to make sure John B kept his eyes on you. JJ knew you two were close.

“I won’t push you to tell me. But you can talk to me about it. I won’t judge you.”

“Thanks, JJ,” You said graciously. People say that all the time. You can talk to me. For the most part you never believe them. You think its just something people say to make them sound sincere. But with JJ it was different. You believed every word.

“Just promise me if you see him again to take someone with you. Like John B or something.”

“Okay,” You said. You didn’t know if you meant it because all you could think about was that JJ cared enough about you to be worried. 

“Okay...” JJ said awkwardly. “So we’re good? Friends?”

Your heart cracked at the ‘F’ word but you knew you were crazy to hope for anything else. You were lucky enough to even get called a friend. You bit down on your bottom lip as your grinned and nodded. “Friends.”

“Good,” JJ nodded. “So, I’ll see you soon?”

“Yeah, I’ll see you soon.”

“Okay...” JJ clapped his hands in front of him nervously. “Good. Then I’m just gonna...”

“Yeah, I should probably get back to...” You pointed back to the mulch.

“Bye, Sassy.”

You turned back to the mulch in your wheelbarrow and bit back the urge to squeal in delight, at least until the van pulled out of your driveway again. 

“Actually you know what?” JJ said, making you turn around. He was walking back over to you with a determined look on his face. “Screw friends.” 

“What -”

Before you could process what was happening, JJ cupped your cheeks and smashed his lips against yours. You instantly kissed him back and pulled him closer to you by fisting your hands into his shirt. The butterflies in your body transformed into a stampeded and your heart was hammering against your rib cage. 

You’ve kissed so many other guys before, but this one felt different. There was a passion behind this one - a meaning that felt so deep it could only be explained through actions. Kissing JJ felt right, like you had done this hundreds of times before. 

JJ pulled away first and rested his forehead against yours, his eyes trained on your swollen lips. His breath hit your face and your legs went weak in the knees. 

“I’ve wanted to do that for about two years.” He said.

“What took you so long?” You said, your eye lashes fluttered up to look at him.

“I didn’t know what I had until it was gone,” JJ said, looking up at you. He pulled away to look you in the eyes. “I love you, Y/N. And I understand if you don’t feel the same way but - “

You pulled him in for another kiss as fireworks exploded in your head. You didn’t want to let go of this moment. You couldn't believe that everything you wanted was happening.

“I love you too.”

JJ’s eyes lit up like lights on a Christmas tree as did his smile that widened with each second. He picked you up by your waist and spun you around. You giggled above him and beamed down at him. You’ve never felt this happy in your entire life.

When he set you down, he kissed you again. “Say it again.”

You pulled him in close enough for your faces to be nose to nose. “I. Love. You. JJ Maybank.”

JJ shook his head and chuckled. “Unbelievable.”

He kissed you again, and you didn’t care if you didn’t get the yard work done in time because you fulfilled your duty as a Kook. You officially have everything you could ever want. 

And you wouldn’t have it any other way.

Tags: @allycat449-blog @zarahsloves

#jj #jj maybank #jj x reader #jj x y/n #jj x kook!reader #jj maybank one shot #jj maybank imagine #jj maybank fic #jj maybank x reader #outer banks #outer banks fic #outer banks imagine #john b routledge #kiara carrera #pope heyward #jj fanfiction #jj fic #jj imagine

[marvelfansince08love]

Hey Neighbour! - Part 8

Word Count: 3k

Pairing: Ally Mayfair-Richards x Reader 

Warning: uhh some implications of sex 

A/N: Hi, a big big sorry to you all on the late updates to this. I have no self control and have far too many WIP rn and keep forgetting to update this one as I’ve almost finished it! Happy reading! Apologise for any grammar/spelling mistakes x

Tags: @waitingfortheendtocome @natasha-danvers @creepingwolfberry @coconutlipss @saucy-sapphic @minavenable @pearplate @r0an0ke @mssallymckenna @grilledcheeseandguavajelly @venablemayfairgoode @chewbacca0805 @pluied-ete @supremeinlilac @nyx-aira @witchxaf @black--widxw @fireflyglass @cordeliafoxxe @d14n4ol @bluevelvetbitxh @amethyst-bitch @lezzzbehonesthere @msvenablezcane @citizenoftheworld-stuff-blog @mooreashes @violentwavesofem0tion @cordeliass  @women-am-i-right @paulsonpills @goodeday2u @sm0ke-and-m1rr0rs @daisybri7

Hey Neighbour! - Part 8 

You had avoided the Mayfair-Richards home for the past five days unable to face the woman you had fallen in love with. Old wounds and insecurities had opened up causing you to retreat from your neighbours, Amelia had also picked up on your change of mood which caused the guilt to amplify. The two young children still saw each other at school leading Amelia to mention how Oz had told her how sad his mother looked whenever she did the dishes at night, to anyone else they would have been bewildered by the statement but for you it was like a stab to the heart. Ally had tried to call and text you to ask if you were okay, your short texts back and actively declining calls must have given her the hint that you didn’t want to be contacted because after the first three days she stopped trying. You hated yourself for doing this to her but you couldn’t help but fall back into the familiar withdrawal habit whenever you felt this way, no matter who you hurt in the process. 

“Mama, I’m finished!” Amelia announces, smiling proudly at her empty plate. You’re startled out of your thoughts as you look towards her matching her wide smile with a forced one. Your brother sits next to her as his eyes stay fixated on your form, concern evident within his gaze. 

“Well done, Amelia-cakes! Why don’t you go wash your hands and brush your teeth for bed,” you instruct softly, watching as she nods and dashes out of the room. You quickly make eye contact with him as you lean forward keeping your voice low so to not alert Amelia of the intense situation..

“I wish you would stop looking at me like that,” you whisper harshly, he only shakes his head mutely before responding. 

“I just don’t understand why you’re making yourself and her miserable, you clearly like each other a lot. Don’t ruin this just because you’re allowing your negative thoughts to take over,” his voice soft and gentle causing you to falter, expecting a harsher response. Sighing you relax back before taking a sip from the wine glass. 

“Will you please help Amelia upstairs while I clean up here?” you ask instead, attempting to avoid the current topic of conversation. He sighs in defeat before dutifully leaving the room to find his niece. 

You stand from your chair and collect the empty plates before moving towards the sink, as you begin to clean the dishes you notice a slightly dimmed light across the way causing you to tense, slowly you look up from your task and towards the light. Ally stands at her kitchen counter, even from here you can see how tired she looks causing that familiar guilt to creep up into your chest once more. She looks down for a few moments before placing a large piece of paper into the window, words written in black ink for you to read. 

‘I think we need to talk’ The words cause you to gulp as you nod back before searching for some spare paper to write back on. 

‘Garden in ten?’ you try to smile hoping to ease the situation but falter when she doesn’t return it and only nods back in acknowledgment. 

Wiping your hands on a dry towel you hurriedly move upstairs to inform your brother of your plan, he reassures you that he’ll be fine with Amelia while you go to talk to Ally giving you an encouraging smile before shoving you back towards the staircase. Grabbing your thick jacket and shoes you make your way towards the front of Ally’s home, waiting patiently for her to let you in. Your breath catches in your throat as you take her in, the urge to reach out and hold her becoming stronger with each passing second, brown tired eyes scan your face before silently standing to the side allowing you to move in. You head straight for the kitchen and into the garden area sitting down in your usual spot, you wait for her to join you. A hot cocoa mug appears in front of your view causing you to smile sadly as you take it from her hands muttering a quick ‘thank you’. It’s quiet and dark out except for the porch light that glows above you, both sitting quietly as you take a sip of the hot drink.

“Ally I-” 

“Why weren’t you honest with me? If there was something wrong you should have told me instead of practically falling off the face of the earth,” her statement catches you off guard, causing you to falter as you stare at the mug in your hand. 

“After she left me and Amelia I was struggling for a while, I couldn’t cope with working and looking after a baby full time but I had this beautiful girl to look out for so she became my top priority over everything, my job, my friends. It took me years before I could trust others outside of my family to take care of her. I’m not good at having these healthy relationships that are good for me and I am so sorry that I’ve treated you this way, you deserve better than this,” you mutter, tears gathering within your blurred vision.

“I understand how hard it can be to trust people, I mean you know about Ivy and how she betrayed me, betrayed Oz. I get why you got scared when things were looking serious, I’ve had my moments with that too but Y/N I’m not like her and you aren’t like Ivy.” She pauses, collecting her thoughts before continuing. 

“We are good people and I don’t think it was a coincidence that it was you who so happened to move in next door… that night after the fair apart from Oz I’ve never been so certain about anything in my life, I want to be with you and I want this to go somewhere but I need you to speak to me and be honest with me,” Ally tilts her head as if seeking your gaze before reaching across and grabbing your hand. 

“I’m so so sorry, Ally. I should have spoken to you about my worries, I’m not used to someone caring. I just looked at how comfortable we all were in your kitchen that morning, how domestic it all was and my god I couldn’t have fallen further for you but my mind was screaming at me that if I allowed Amelia to become closer to you and you decided to leave… I can’t have another person walk out on her.. On me,” you stutter over your words as you feel your throat tighten, holding back a sob. Ally moves from her seat and crouches in front of you placing your mug onto the table she takes both your hands into her own, squeezing them with reassurance. 

“I love you y/n. This week has been tortuous the amount of times I thought about walking over and forcing you to speak to me, but I knew you needed time to collect your thoughts. I may not have been obvious with it but I could tell something had spooked you that morning but please come and talk to me whenever you feel trapped into a corner, okay?” her dark brows arch, as she waits for your response. As you nod Ally reaches upwards and captures your salty lips with her own, her warm comforting hands cupping your face in place. 

Tears continue to fall between you both as Ally presses gentle kisses along your jaw and cheeks seeking out that comforting touch, you realise that you were wrong. Ally isn’t like the rest of them, she’s kind and caring but most of all she understands you in a way that no one else can relate to. You quickly capture her lips, a heated kiss needing to feel her close. 

“Is Oz upstairs?” 

“No, he’s staying at a friends house,” she mumbles, against your lips. Pulling back you look into her slightly glazed eyes and demand the thing you need most. 

“Take me to bed, Ally.” 

With that, Ally grabs your hand and leads you back inside the house. The moonlight glows throughout the room giving you a clear view of Ally’s face as you allow her to look after you, whispering soft reassurances against your exposed skin leaving trails of wet kisses along your body, closing your eyes you surrender yourself to this woman finally allowing yourself to be loved without restrictions. 

***

Bright light beams through into the bedroom causing you to stir and groan at the invasive light cuddling into the softness of Ally’s chest enjoying her warmth and secure form wrapped around you. Lips graze against your hair as the brunette whispers a ‘Good Morning’ causing you to smile as you watch her fingers brush over your forearm that has stayed wrapped around her waist all night. 

“Good Morning, Honey. Did you sleep well?” your fake-innocence doesn’t pass Ally as she chuckles deeply, her hand moving to tilt your chin upwards causing your lips to brush against her swollen ones. 

“Deliciously actually,” her hoarse voice, makes you shiver before you capture her lips once more enjoying the sounds that escape her throat. 

The sound of the front door opening downstairs and quick footsteps making their way upstairs causes you to part suddenly, blindly reaching for your scattered clothes recognizing those footsteps from anywhere. 

“Mom!!” Oz’s voice shouts from the hallway, causing you to quickly cover up and head for the en-suite bathroom needing to freshen up before the poor boy sees you. Ally’s eyes follow after your retreating form in light amusement as she tucks on the woolly jumper and ties the string around her joggers. 

“Mom I’m home! We had such a cool night! Jeremy bought over his new racing car you know the one with the remote it was awesome!” Oz’s excited voice trails into the room as he runs straight for Ally’s legs hugging her tightly, she places her hands on top of his crazy blonde curls and smiles.

“Well it certainly sounds like you had fun! So where is Sam’s mom? You didn’t just run from her car without saying thank you did you?” Ally’s tone makes you smile as you peak through the gap of the bathroom door always infatuated with her motherly side. Oz tries to hide his expression but with one raised eyebrow from Ally the boy slumps and sighs before nodding. 

“It’s okay Ally! He was just excited to see you! Oz I’ve left your bag by the door okay,” Sam’s mom shouts from the staircase before the sound of the front door closing reaches your ears. Taking this as your cue you leave the bathroom just as the sound of screeching reaches your ears, a small body colliding with your own making you stumble. 

“Woah! Hey Buddy!” you greet with a groan, laughing as you place you cup your hand around his jaw cradling him close. A sense of guilt lingering within your chest, the realisation what your actions could have done to the poor boy being the same fear you have for Amelia. 

“I’ve missed you,” he mumbles into your stomach, you crouch to be eye level with him and give him the biggest smile you could muster. 

“I’m sorry for not being around much, silly adults and silly work has been keeping me busy. I promise to make it up to you,” you murmur, watching as he nods accepting your apology before turning to leave to grab his backpack from downstairs. You stand from your position and fold your arms across your chest, that unsettling feeling still present, Ally steps towards you and places her hands onto your cheeks before kissing your lips. 

“Stop, I can practically hear the gears turning in that beautiful head of yours. Now let’s go downstairs. I want to see my girl.” Her words cause you to raise a question eyebrow as your lips twitch into a half grin. 

“Oh?”

Ally grins wickedly, before stepping towards the door. “I meant Amelia silly.”

With that she winks and takes her leave leaving you agape. 

“Well I know my place then,” you grumble playfully before running after the mischievous Senator. 

As if on cue the sound of the front door stops you both in your tracks midway down the stairs, Ally moves to answer the door and beams when she sees Amelia stood with her Uncle who has a very dirty grin on his face as his eyes move from Ally to you wiggling his brows as Ally crouches down and fronds over Amelia who seems to be enjoying the attention from her favourite person. 

“Uncle Rupert said you guys had a sleepover without me, Ms. Ally!” she exclaims, a small pout forming onto her lips and you bite your own to stop your laughter. From the shakes coming from Ally’s shoulder the woman seems to be doing the same. 

“Oh sweetheart I’m so sorry, I promise we can have soon okay? Just me and your mom needed to have a grown-up sleepover to talk.” 

“Yeah I bet you did,” Rupert mumbles, amusement evident within his tone. You glare at him from your position as Oz comes running from the living room area, he instantly goes to hug his friend as he drags her further into the house telling her all about his sleepover. Rupert waits by the door as Ally gives him a shy hello before following the two leaving you to talk privately to the smug man.

“Not a word,” you demand, making sure to punctuate every word, it only seems to make him grin further. He shrugs putting his hands up in surrender as he steps through the door meeting you at the bottom of the staircase. 

“So are we back on then? Oh and no need to thank me for looking after the devil's spawn last night, I swear she just knows what to do to make me crumble. I didn’t even know you still owned a Nintendo Wii,” he rants, as you both walk towards the kitchen where Ally sits with the two children all drinking from their respective mugs. Rupert goes to sit next to Amelia as he steals her mug to take a sip as she glares at him. You shake your head at the two before clashing eyes with Ally who winks over her mug gesturing you over which you gladly do. Stood behind her you wrap your arms around her shoulders and listen as they all converse amongst themselves enjoying these rare moments that you will hold dearly, smiling you kiss Ally’s temple before relaxing joining in on the conversation. 

Now relaxed you allow the past to stay at the back of your mind as you look forward to the future, a secret plan up your sleeve you allow the details to rail off within your head excited to show Ally just how much she means to you and how do you do that?

By going official, of course.

#ally mayfair richards x reader #ally mayfair richards #ally mayfair imagine #ally mayfair x reader #sarah paulson #sarah paulson x reader #ahs cult #american horror story #hey neighbour! series #my work

[flightlessangelwings]

Kidnapped

Marcus Moreno x gn!reader

Word Count: 2.5k

Warnings: kidnapping, mild violence, angst, established relationship, fluff

Request from anon

~

You never thought your life would turn out like this, but you wouldn’t complain at all. If someone had told you months ago that you would be with Marcus Moreno, the leader of the Heroics, you would have laughed and called them crazy. But after a chance meeting at the laundromat, you both left with each other’s numbers and a new friendship quickly turned into something more. Feelings grew fast between you and Marcus, and soon neither of you could imagine your lives without the other.

His daughter Missy also quickly became a big part of your life. The two of you hit it off just as quickly, and you were just as fond of her as you were her father. You found yourself at the Moreno house more nights than not, even if Marcus wasn’t home. Nights alone with Missy were just as fun as the nights the three of you spent together. Everything just felt right, and you felt like you belonged to a family for the first time in your life. 

It was a beautiful sunny afternoon and you stood outside of your car and leaned against it as you waited for Missy to get out of school. Marcus had called you and said he wouldn’t be out of headquarters in time and frantically asked you to pick Missy up. You didn’t hesitate, and you were more and happy to get her.

Missy called your name as she bounced up to you, surprised but still happy to see you. It wasn’t the first time you picked her up from school, but this time it came unexpectedly. 

Marcus also had insisted that even though Missy was to join the Heroics in the future, school was still important for the time being. When he had asked for your opinion, you were taken off guard but you agreed with him. Missy gave you both a pout, but she realized that there would be plenty of time in her life to be a hero, and for now she needed to enjoy her time as a kid.

“Surprise kiddo,” you gave her a hug when she ran up to you with open arms, “I’m your chauffeur today.”

“Dad couldn’t make it?” she asked as he set her backpack in the backseat.

You nodded as you held the door open for her, “Yeah, he got caught up at headquarters so it’s just you and me for now,” the two of you stood at the side of your car as you planned out your afternoon, “How about we get a little after school snack, whatever you want, and then we can make something together for when your dad gets home?”

Missy’s face lit up, “I think you should pick me up from school more often!”

“Don’t tell your father that,” you laughed, but you enjoyed the sentiment. She was more than just your boyfriend’s kid to you, and you cared for her as if she was your own kid.

But your light mood was quickly brought down when a distant explosion rocked the ground. Luckily for you and Missy, it was further down the street and on the other side of the car from where you stood. You quickly grabbed her and ducked you both down so that your car served as a shield. Screams ran through the air as people ran, and you and Missy both peeked around the hood to see what the cause of the commotion was.

“You ok?” you whispered to her, and she nodded in response.

Missy stepped forward a bit to get a better view, despite your protests. In the distance, she saw a large, towering man, and you both could feel his heavy footsteps in the ground as he quickly approached you.

“Titan…” Missy breathed as she recognized the new foe.

He was someone who had gone head to head with both Missy and Marcus on missions in the past. However, they were never able to get the upper hand, and he always slipped away at the last minute. Titan’s power was super strength, and he was aptly named as he tossed cars out of his way like they were nothing. The muscles in his arms were bigger than Missy’s entire body and Titan towered over nearly everyone he encountered. She was right to be afraid, as were you.

“I think it’s time to call your dad now,” you suggested as you tried to hide the panic in your voice.

“Yeah,” Missy snapped out of her daze and ducked back down as she tapped at the device on her wrist.

“Moreno!” Titan shouted, which caused you and Missy to freeze in terror and look at each other. He was after her, and this was a deliberate attack since Marcus was nowhere near.

“Missy? What’s going on?” Marcus’ voice rang through the device, but it did not bring as much comfort as you would have liked.

“Dad! It’s Titan… He’s here…” she sounded braver than you felt.

On the other end on the line, Marcus jumped to his feet as he said both of your names. You could feel the panic in his voice through the communicator, “I’m on my way,” he spoke without hesitation.

Just as the words left his lips, Marcus summoned his swords, ripped off his glasses and grabbed his tac vest. His face was stoic as he tried to keep a level head while he ran out of headquarters as fast as he could. The two people he cared the most about were in danger, and he wouldn’t be able to forgive himself if anything happened to either of you. He kept the communicator on so he could talk to both of you as he grabbed a hoverboard and dashed out toward you and Missy.

But he wouldn’t be fast enough. Titan quickly found where you and Missy were hidden behind your car, and he was able to lift and toss your car aside with ease. You gasped and grabbed Missy and tried to run away, but it was useless. His long arm reached out, and before he could grab her, you pushed her aside so that he clutched onto you instead. Although both Missy and Marcus were heroes, you still made a promise to Marcus that you would always look after and protect Missy when you were with her. So, even as scared as you were, you didn’t even hesitate to step in the way.

You let out a scream as he pulled you away from Missy, and you could hear both her and Marcus shout your name. Missy tried to lunge forward in an attempt to get him to let you go, but he knocked her back with a dark chuckle. Marcus grit his teeth as he listened to the scuffle. He hadn’t felt this helpless in a long time and he absolutely hated it. All he wanted to do was keep you and Missy, his family, safe.

“Hang on,” he mumbled under his breath, “I’m coming… I’m coming…” 

“Marcus Moreno,” Titan threatened, “I know you’re listening,” Titan stared Missy down as he spoke with you trapped in his grip, “I’m taking something you love… So come and get me.” With that, he turned to leave, and easily blocked Missy’s attempt to attack him again.

Marcus was too late to do anything, and he sped up just in time to watch his nemesis walk away with you in his arms. You struggled and tried to break free, but it was useless. His heart dropped at the sight, and it only got worse when he saw his daughter on the ground.

“Missy!” he called out as he rushed over and scooped her up in his arms. 

He inspected her for any wounds, but other than some bruising, she was ok. Tears streamed down her face, however, and Missy buried herself in her father’s chest, “He… he took…” she said your name as she sobbed.

“Shhh,” Marcus wrapped his arms around Missy tightly, “It’ll be ok,” he tried to hide how worried he actually was as he promised Missy that they would get you back no matter what.

You didn’t remember passing out, but you must have at some point because you woke up in what looked like a dungeon. Your arms were shackled to the wall above you and your legs barely touched the floor. With a grunt, you tried to wriggle free, although you knew it was useless.

A dark laugh from the shadows called your attention, and you held your breath as you watched the large figure emerge from the dark corner of the room, “It’s pointless to struggle,” Titan mocked you as he stepped in front of you, “Not even the Heroics could break out of those, what makes you think you can?”

“Go screw yourself,” you spat, not ready to give in to him completely.

That only made him laugh harder, “You’re a feisty one aren’t you?” he cupped your chin to make you meet his gaze, “And good looking too. Moreno sure does know how to pick them.”

“What do you want?” you jerked your head to the side to get him to let go of you.

“I need some leverage, and that’s what you are my dear,” his tone was icy as his fingers trailed down your neck, and it made a chill run down your spine, “Let’s see how well he fights now.” 

You grit your teeth as a surge of anger washed through you and temporarily overtook the fear. As Titan hovered over you, you noticed that your legs dangled free and you took full advantage of that. With a deep breath, you kicked your leg up and hit him right between his own legs.

He let out a grunt, but you soon realized it was more from surprise than pain. Titan growled as he grabbed your face, “I appreciate the spark, sweetness,” his voice was low and threatening, “I’ll have to deal with you later.”

With that, Titan turned and left you alone in the room. He slammed the door loudly behind him before he locked it.

A defeated sigh escaped your lips as you rested your head back against the wall. You didn’t know how long you hung there, but you felt your arms start to go numb so it had to be a good while. The room was silent save for your breaths and occasional sob until you heard a loud commotion from down the hall. You lifted your head and fixed your gaze on the door although you couldn’t see anything.

You could hear though, and it sounded like a heated fight not too far from where you were held. You heard several crashes and shouts, although you couldn’t quite make out who the voices belonged to. If you were to take a guess, however, you were sure that one of the voices belonged to Marcus. Your heart pounded in your chest as you helplessly listened to the battle just on the other side of the wall and you could only hope that the Heroics would finally defeat Titan this time.

When it suddenly got quiet, you held your breath and stared at the door. You were afraid to breathe or even blink as you heard a faint shuffle of movement on the other side and you balled your hands into fists since that was all you were able to do. Then, you heard a creak and a bang as the door suddenly flew off its hinges. You shut your eyes tightly and turned your head into your arm in an attempt to protect yourself as best as you could.

The sound of your name in Missy’s voice made you look up, and your shoulders dropped in relief when you saw her and Marcus in the doorway. Their eyes welled up with tears at the sight of you, and Missy instantly bolted towards you. Marcus raised his arm and used his powers to pull the large shackles that bound your wrists out of the wall.

You dropped down to the floor and immediately sank to your knees. You were about to fold over onto yourself when Missy crashed herself into you and wrapped her arms tightly around you. She didn’t even bother to fight back her tears as she cried into your shoulder and held you as tightly as she possibly could. 

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” Missy repeated over and over as her tears dampened your shirt.

“I’m ok, Missy,” you reassured her in a soft voice as you held her back. You could feel her tremble in your arms, and you would have been more shocked about her reaction if you hadn’t just been rescued, “I’m ok,” you repeated as you stroked her back and your own tears fell down your cheeks.

Marcus stood over the two of you and his face finally relaxed when he saw you were unharmed. Your eyes trailed up to meet his and you saw his shoulders visibility drop in relief. After the two of you shared a soft smile, he dropped down to his knees and embraced both of you. His swords clattered to the ground beside you. Marcus wrapped his arms around both you and Missy and brought you as close as he could to his chest, unwilling to let either of you go for a good while. 

“Are you hurt?” he finally asked as he pulled away just enough to get a better look at your face.

You shook your head, “I’m ok,” you took a shaky breath, “I was more scared for you two… He said I was leverage and I…” you drifted off as you felt Missy squeeze you even tighter and you didn’t want to think of what could have happened. 

Marcus felt his own tears well up in the corners of his eyes as he studied your face. It was then that he truly realized how much you meant to him, “I was scared too,” he admitted in a hushed tone, and from your arms Missy muffled in agreement, “I couldn’t live with myself if something happened to you. You and Missy…” he took a deep breath, “You’re my world,” he was quiet for a minute as he squeezed your arm tightly, “I love you.”

Your eyes went wide. This was the first time Marcus had said the words out loud; you both decided to wait until you were sure and ready to say it, even though it was obvious how much you each cared about each other. But before you could open your mouth to reply, you were cut off by Missy.

“I love you too,” she said your name as she looked up at you and finally pulled away. 

You laughed as you caressed the side of her face, “I love you too, Missy,” you placed a soft kiss to the top of her head before you turned to Marcus, “And I love you, Marcus.”

Marcus let out the breath he held since his confession and leaned in to place a tender kiss to your lips. He smiled into the kiss as he wrapped his arms around you and Missy again and just held you both close to his heart where you were both safe, “Let’s get out of here.”

“Please,” Missy added as he helped you both stand. 

~

Notes: I live for this trope so much so I had a lot of fun with this one!!! And I used the reader from the Laundry Day drabble since people really liked that one but it wasn’t needed to read that one. Thank you to the anon who requested this! And as always, taglists are open so let me know if you’d like to be added :)

#marcus moreno x reader #marcus moreno #marcus moreno x you #marcus moreno imagine

[maximumjinx]

Steven Universe Gravity Falls AU

~Yknow what they say, if you run out of content, ya gotta make it yourself. This is a ? shot (I might continue or not who knows not me) please don’t ask for more I have 18 unfinished fanfics on this site.~

California was nice, Steven had to admit. The people were nice, the food was fantastic, and the weather was splendid. It reminded him a lot of Beach City. Though there were just so many people, and traveling north, Steven was beginning to long for something small and simple again.

Oregon was the perfect place for that, right?

“Ronaldo wants pictures of Bigfoot, and if anyone can find him, its you Steven.” Petey’s voice was faint on Steven’s phone speaker, tossed into the passenger seat as Steven blindly picked a highway exit.

“Sure Petey, but couldn’t Ronaldo just go to a circus?”

“Not big feet Steven,” Petey emphasized, “Bigfoot.”

“Saying it twice isn’t helping buddy.” Steven was half paying attention. He was focusing on the winding roads and the looming trees surrounding him. Deep, in the pit of Steven’s stomach, he felt something start to tug him toward one direction farther away from the highway. He wasn’t quite sure if it was a good or bad feeling yet.

“Forget it, I’m going to take a blurry photo of that mean Gem in the woods and say its Bigfoot.”

“Just don’t let Jasper catch you, she’s no joke when she’s angry.”

“I saw her ripping grass out of the ground I think I’ll be fine. Later dude.”

Steven heard a small click and smiled to himself. He’s happy to see how far the people of Beach City have come and how they’ve taken to the gems. He remembers when the Crystal Gems were once the outcasts of town that locals warned you to stay away from.

He looked up to see a welcome sign.

“Gravity falls. Well, that’s a funny name.”

—

Steven wanted small and simple but he feels he may have overshot it.

This small town had exactly three attractions. A town museum that mentioned marrying woodpeckers (Steven couldn’t figure out if that was a normal human thing, like taxes and velcro), a small diner, and as one local described it ‘some tourist trap’ deep in the woods. It was a sticky summer day and the former two attractions didn’t have airconditioning. Steven gambled on the last stop in hopes of stretching his legs and maybe finding a source to the strange feeling in his gut. It had become much stronger since he entered this small town. Alluring, but nothing related to Gems as far as Steven could tell.

He parked in the nearly empty lot and stepped out. Jacket wrapped loosely around his hips, Steven made his way inside.

A girl that looked about 13 was petting a pig on the front porch. She was incredibly reflective, and depsite the heat wore a knitted bedazzled sweater that made her glow like a disco ball in the sun.

She looked Steven up and down as he approached, a wide smile taking up her face and Steven saw bright braces with colored bands.

“Hi!” She launched upwards, startling the pig away, “I’m Mabel, but you can call me anytime.” The girl winked and stuck out her hand, palm facing the floor.

Steven blinked.

“Mabel, stop scaring away the customers!” A gruff voice yelled through the screen door, and soon an older man stepped out in a suit, wearing a fez and eyepatch.

Immediately the old man squinted at Steven, sizing him up.

Stanley Pines knew this teen wasn’t local, but he wasn’t sure if he had any money. For all he knew he was another boy trying to hit on his giftshop cashier, Wendy.

Oh well, a customer is a customer.

“Come in, come in, and see our mystical and magical wonders!”

“Magical?” This could be it, Steven could figure out why this town has felt off. Maybe it was gem related after all.

Quickly this older man who had introduced himself as Mr. Mystery gave Steven a tour of what looked like failed taxidermy projects. Now Steven may have a lived a sheltered childhood, but he felt pretty confident there was no such thing as a Sashcrotch. And so far, nothing had felt magical or mysterious.

“That concludes our tour! Here is our mistifying giftshop and it’s purchasable wonders!”

“Right...” Well, at the very least he was able to spend some time in airconditioning.

There was a girl behind the desk in plaid that looked about Steven’s age, and just a half inch shorter than him. She looked bored, flipping through a magazine as a young boy that looked a lot like Mabel made googly eyes as he swept by the door.

Steven guessed there was no harm in asking around.

“Hi, I’m Steven.” He smiled easily, walking up to the register.

“No refunds, even if an exhibit bit you.” She sighed, peeking up before turning back to her magazine.

“Oh no, nothing bit me, I just wanted to know something.”

She looked up to get a better look at Steven and gave a small smirk.

“Sure, but only because I like your shirt. Mr. Universe merch, now that’s a deep cut.”

Unbeknownst to Steven, Dipper Pines would had been watching the exchange felt a twinge of uneasiness as this out of towner talked with Wendy.

“Have you ever seen anything strange or weird actually happen in this town?”

Wendy’s smile dropped.

“Why do you ask?” Her eyes flickered to Dipper, just for a moment, and that was all he needed to rush over.

“Excuse me sir, please buy something or exit the store.” Dipper spoke in the deepest voice he could muster.

Steven looked over with a questioning expression.

“Oh sure uh-“ He blindly reached for the wad of bills that his dad had given to him before he left. Steven pulled out a hundred dollar bill and put it on the counter. Wendy looked up baffled as Steven stuffed the other cash back in his wallet.

“Boy was I wrong about you kid!” Mr. Mystery, seemingly materializing out of nowhere, now bounded over. He had loosened his tie and lost the eyepatch which turned out he never needed.

“Whaddya wanna know? I’ll tell you everything. There’s gnomes in the woods you know-“

“Grunkle Stan!” Dipper protested loudly, dragging his Stan away and harshly whispering at him.

“Did you steal that money?” Wendy asked as Steven watched the pair whisper fight in the corner. He turned back to the girl and gave a sheepish smile.

“Uh no, my dad gave it to me before this roadtrip. He’s actually Mr. Universe.”

Wendy lit up.

“No freaking way! Your dad is Mr. Universe? I only got into him since he managed Sadie Killer and the Suspects and they always perform covers of his songs on tour, I can’t believe he’s your dad!” She rambled, stars in her eyes. Steven beamed, he loved when people praised his dad’s music. Greg really deserved it.

Steven learned Wendy’s name and they swapped stories back and forth, only interrupted as the girl from outside slowly rose from the behind the counter beaming.

“A cute musician that loves weird stuff, take me now.” She swooned. Steven blushed profusely, not used to the attention.

“Sorry, my girlfriend Connie probably wouldn’t like that very much.” He said gently. Mabel looked him up and down and pouted.

“I can wait, but not forever.” She warned, and winked, bounding to break apart her grunkle and Dipper, who are now whisper screaming with arms flailing.

“I wasn’t going to mention that Dorito shaped jerk! Just the normal stuff!”

“It’s dangerous! He could be a spy, or government, or another stack of gnomes!”

Steven raised an eyebrow and looked at Wendy. She chuckled and shrugged. Steven carefully approached them.

“He can hear everything you’re saying anyways so might as well tell him!” Mabel interrupted, nodding towards Steven as he came up.

“If it makes you feel any better, I’m definitely not government.” Steven technically didn’t exist at all. He never had a social security card and didn’t have a birth certificate.

Dipper only glared. Rich strangers with an interest in the paranormal didn’t come through gravity falls without some kind of agenda.

Steven hated the conflict he was starting. No information was worth this family fighting.

“Okay,” he surrendered, hands up, “I’ll just go. I’ll stick around town until tomorrow if you change your minds”

“Wait Steven-”

“Let him go Wendy,” Dipper glared as the boy in pink walked out, “We can’t trust him.”

“But I was going to ask for Sadie tickets...” Wendy groaned, defeated.

“There’s something weird about him.”

“Great!” Mabel beamed, “He’ll fit right in.”

~.~

Steven wasn’t crazy about sleeping in his car, but was seriously considering it after seeing the state of his motel room. It looked like it hadn’t been used in decades, a thin line of dust covering every surface. He was also pretty sure they didn’t even have free ice. 

“Wish Pearl were here..” He mumbled, exhausted. He curled up on top of the covers, fully clothed, and let sleep take him.

Being Steven Universe however, meant rest was sure to allude the half alien. 

Steven found himself in a dark space, fog all around him. Before a word could come out of his mouth he heard a fast, repetitive muttering. 

“Stranger...Wendy looked pretty today..Can’t trust...Tell no one...Ford isn’t here..”

“What, the-” Steven quietly walked toward the source of dialogue, and saw the faded silhouette of the boy from the Mystery Shack. His back was turned to him, but Steven recognized the blue vest and mosquito bitten legs. 

“I thought I was over the dream hopping.” Steven spoke a tad too loudly, starting the young boy - Dipper.

“What-” Dipper’s eyes grew wide in panic, and the boy fell back harshly.

“No, no, you can’t be in my head!” 

“Wait, I’m not-” Steven tried to reassure him, stepping carefully towards the boy but Dipper let out a screech of terror, sweat gathering around his temples.

“Bill sent you didn’t he?! He’s not really gone- he’s going to hurt Mable again-” Dipper began to hyperventilate. 

“Dipper please,” Steven took a step back, arms in the air in surrender. 

“I-”

“I’m not going to hurt you I swear on the gems.” He placed a hand over his heart. “This is a total invasion of privacy but it’s something that happens when someone’s emotions are out of control-”

“How are you here?” Dipper demanded, scrambling to his feet. “Tell me what you are and what you want.”

“I’m just passing through!” Steven insisted, then lowered his tone to calm the younger boy. “I’m kinda of magnet for weird stuff. I just wanted to help in case anything was going on.”

“We deal with things just fine around here.” Dipper spat, then watched as Steven deflated. He seemed tired, like he hasn't slept well in a while. 

“So what are you anyways? How can you be here?”

Steven winced, and laughed nervously. “It’s kind of a long story..”

Dipper raised and eyebrow and swept his arm around the void dramatically. 

“You have until dawn.”

~

“I thought that was a conspiracy theory, it wasn’t even covered by major news outlets.” Dipper look exhausted, cross legged on the unseen floor as he ran his hands through his hair. 

“I think Garnet is pretty persuasive when it comes to government and reporters. They all kinda fall in love with her.”

“She’s the one that’s really two aliens?” 

Steven shook his head with a small smile. “It’s hard to explain but yes, I guess that comes close.”

“That’s actually insane. I’m insane, aren’t I?” Dipper stood up, leaving Steven on sitting next to an empty space. “It’s been too quiet around here and now I’m so desperate for weird, that I’m making it all up in my head.”

“I get that feeling.” Steven smiled without humor, “but no, this is real. I’ll prove it when you wake up.” Steven felt a shift, the fog in the void getting denser. 

“Sooner than I thought, you’re an early riser huh?”

Dipper looked back at Steven, panicked. “You’ll come to the Shack again right? In just a bit?”

Steven smiled. “Promise.”

~

Dipper woke up to his sister braiding his hair. Mabel still had her pjs on, and a make up kit next to the bed. Dipper frowned, tasting strawberry shortcake. 

“Stop testing party looks on me, Mabel.”

“Stop having my face structure and maybe I will.” She grinned, covered in blue glitter. 

Dipper quickly washed up and got dressed for the day, feeling like he was anxiously waiting for something but not quite remembering what. 

He felt like he had a strange dream last night...

He quickly remembered, choking on cereal as Steven walked into the shack right as it opened. Hair slightly frizzy from the heat and eyes strangely tired. Maybe dream hopping took energy that he anticipated. 

“Steven!”

“Meal ticket!” 

“Grunkle Stan.” Mabel chastised as Dipper rushed over to the older boy. 

“Good morning everyone.” 

Dipper stopped short, slightly hoping that everything he experienced wasn’t just his imagination. That everything exciting and weird and interesting wasn’t always trying to kill him, ruin his life, or steal his candy. 

Steven looked tired, like he had been doing this much longer than Dipper, but he had still come out with enough energy to smile. 

“Not insane?” Dipper asked hopefully, quietly. Steven snapped his attention from his Grunkle and Mable bickering down to the Dipper. He gave a reassuring smile, eyes quite serious. 

“Not insane.”

#I feel like I made up a strange tension but please don't ship them THEYRE FOUND FAMILY #Steven universe #gravity falls #universe falls #??? #what's the tag? #dipper pines #Mabel pines #grunkle stan #stan pines #bill cipher #this is something or maybe nothing idk people need to give me plot ideas #probably no plot just one shot series

[binniedeactivated]

Can you please do a part 2 of toxic jun getting Y/N pregnant, where he comes to her apartment and they fight about the baby but they end up having rough sex, where yeonjun says:”Well, you’re already pregnant with my baby so there is no point in doing things calm” or something so he kinda adds up to it anyways?! idk please!

𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆 | 𝐭𝐨𝐱𝐢𝐜!𝐲𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐣𝐮𝐧 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐑𝐄 | 𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐭, 𝐬𝐦𝐮𝐭

𝐖/𝐂 | 2.5k

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 | (𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐨𝐱𝐢𝐜𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐢𝐬 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥) 𝐚𝐫𝐠𝐮𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭, 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐟𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐲, 𝐬𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞, 𝐞𝐝𝐠𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐛𝐞𝐝!𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧, 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐬𝐞𝐱

you sit on your living room couch with your knees to your chest staring at the ultrasound pictures splayed out on the coffee table. you couldn’t believe yourself. getting pregnant by yeonjun who barely even claimed the child in the first place. you wondered how could you be so stupid. but you know there was no way you could do this alone. you were still young and had a lot of growing up to do and combining that with caring for a child, you knew it was impossible.

and this was the very reason why there was now a knock at your door. you invited yeonjun over so he could see the pregnancy process for himself since he thought the child wasn’t his. feeling a little guilty for not claiming the baby firsthand, yeonjun knocks on your door coldly before stuffing his hands back in his coat pocket. you unlock the door opening it slightly before letting him in. you grabbed the pictures and slapped them on the kitchen counter for him to see.

you crossed your arms while watching him get a good look. “the doctor says I’m three months pregnant yeonjun. and you’re the only guy I’ve been sleeping with these past months”.

yeonjun shakes his head with his eyes still plastered on the pictures. “how do I even know that?”.

“you know because I’m telling you. I haven’t had sex with anyone else”.

“there’s no way that this is my child”.

“then whose child is it yeonjun? please tell me. I can’t believe you’re even acting like this”.

he shifts his eyes over to you. “I don’t even know why you invited me over for this bullshit. you heard what I said last time”.

“and you were wrong last time so I want you to see it for yourself”.

“what? did you think it was going to change my mind?”.

“why are you acting like such an asshole yeonjun?! why? why are you acting like it’s not a possibility?”.

“because it’s not”.  

with anger rushing through your veins you pushed him backwards.

“yes there is! you’re the father why can’t you just accept that?! you’re a coward!”.  

“don’t call me that”.

“you are!! there’s no other explanation for why you’re not owning up to it“.

“fuck you. I’m leaving I don’t have to deal with this shit”. he snatches up his car keys to walk towards the door but you push it shut before he could even touch the doorknob.

“you’re not going anywhere”. you say, caging him with your arms.

he leans in your face, thinking about how cute it was to see you thinking that you were stronger than him. “I can go wherever the hell I want”. he hisses.

you breathe with his face only inches from yours. he’s staring you deep in your eyes and you felt your legs turn into jelly right then and there. “you fuck me all the time,”-- you say, “so why do you think you can‘t be the father of my child huh?”. 

“because it’s not mine. I’m not claiming something that I didn’t make. now get the fuck off the door so I can go”.

with a clenched jaw you mindlessly threw frustrated blows at his chest. you felt your face grow hot. “its yours yeonjun!! it’s fucking yours!”.

“stop!”,

“no! because you don’t fucking listen to me you don’t care!! all you care about is yourself!”.

within seconds yeonjun threw you over his shoulder angrily, you were thrown back down onto your bed.

“all those fucking cheap shots will get you nowhere. I said what I said”.

you lean up on your elbows, “because you’re a coward! just admit you’re scared”.

“I’m not a coward”.

“yes you are!”.

“no i’m not”.

“yes you are!”.

yeonjun grips your thighs and roughly slides you down to the edge of the bed. he grips a piece of your hair pinning it down to the sheets.

“stop calling me that”.    

you stared at his wet pink lips. “or what? what are you going to do about it?”.   

he shadowed his lips over yours and didn’t hesitate to mash them both. you hungrily kissed back with his tongue pushing past your clenched teeth to the moist space ahead. breathy, heavy, with your hearts pounding he grips your waist as if to keep you from escaping. you hated to admit it but you loved the way he kissed you so passionate and rough as if he was trying to flatten your lips.

his tongue licks stripes across your neck while you gasp and he’s shoving his hand behind the waistband of your shorts. you twitch at the feeling of his bare fingers running circles around your clit. measly whimpers bypassed your lips and his dark eyes poured into yours. he loved seeing you like this. your eyes half lidded, your mouth slightly parted and your needy noises flooding the atmosphere. he starts dragging his fingers up and down your slit while mushing his lips onto yours again, breathing in the moans that were waiting to leave your throat.

you felt yourself grow hot and wet the more he touched you. and with two fingers yeonjun teases your entrance slightly before pushing them both in. your jaw dropped a bit lower and you gasp while gaping into his eyes. he leans down and plants kisses along your jawline while inching his fingers in and out of you steadily. his other hand was still gripping your hair and pinning it down to the bed, restricting head movement of any kind. so you were trapped under the aggression of yeonjun’s lips and his gradual increasing fingers.

“is this what you called me over for?”. he whispers before kissing the corner of your lips. he pushes his fingers deeper into your core and you whimpered against his chin. “oh my god”.

“so we can fight and fuck?”. he asks again, this time staring down into your hopeless eyes while hiding his bottom lip behind his upper set of teeth. he knew you couldn’t answer and that’s exactly what turned him on. he uses his thumb to work your clit while he was finger fucking you at a rhythm that made you want to cry. the gaspy needy moans that you made was enough to make yeonjun’s dick twitch in his jeans. you shake your head no since you were unable to use your voice. he slides his tongue in your mouth for another wet sloppy kiss.

“you’re a liar”. you were throbbing around his fingers and words couldn’t explain how wet you were. you bucked your hips up a little following the melody of his strokes, wanting him so desperately bad that you didn’t care how you got your fix. he drags your shorts and panties down carelessly tossing them to the side. his lips meet your again while he unzips his jeans and stuffs his dick in place of his lost fingers. with your body moving up your grip his shirt blissfully satisfied with the way he stretched and filled you. he pulls you back down to the edge of the bed by your thighs and grips your hair tighter. he teased you with painfully slow strokes looking down into your open mouth and euphoric gaze.

“fuckk baby--do you hear yourself?”. he glances down below just to watch how your wetness coated his dick each time he pulled out. “oh my god”. he breathes with his dick twitching inside of you in need. what started off as painfully slow strokes turned into wild, rabid thrusts while you moaned loudly into jun’s mouth. with your hair still pinned to the bed he’s practically growling into your ear about how good you feel around him and fucking you insanely rough as if he’d never get the chance again. you felt hopeless with his hips rolling into you and you being able to do nothing but moan his name and cry.

the bed rocks, squeaked and jolt at the aggression of yeonjun and you didn’t know if you felt bad for the bed or your neighbors, because you couldn’t stop cursing and groaning at how deep yeonjun had buried himself inside you. he lost all restraint and was now obsessed with how flushed you looked every time he looked down at you. this fucked out sight was enough for yeonjun to grip your thighs leaving deep angry bruises in the both of them while he fucked you into oblivion. his chest was panting and you could tell he was trying to control his breathing but he just couldn’t stop himself. he delve into you over and over again with desperation. he bends down to let his teeth sink softly into your neck creating hickeys that you knew you wouldn’t be able to hide if you tried.

“junnie I’m going to cumm!”. you whined at his brutality knowing you were in for a hard gut wrenching orgasm if he didn’t stop. he applied pressure to your clit with his thumb, “please cum all over me”. he groans feeling himself about to reach his end too.  and at the sound of his voice while he said those exact words you released right then and there. he was still fucking you even while your body was spasming from the orgasm he was giving you and you couldn’t stop cumming until he was finished. you whined each time your hips jerked up and panted eagerly for the right amount of air. at the feeling of his hot cum spilling into you you felt his soft lips attach themselves to your neck with his dick still twitching inside of you.

“the bbaby--is yours jun”. you stutter in shame that you even let him fuck you again after his big episode. you blink and his lips meet yours again, this time more passionate than rough.

“I know baby. I know”. he answers.

#toxic!yeonjun #yeonjun #choi yeonjun #yeonjun smut

[writing-in-april]

Training wheels

Spencer Reid x Gender Neutral Reader

Summary: Years later after Spencer teaches Reader to drive even though he hates driving, Reader becomes good enough to ride a motorcycle they get him to come along on a ride.

A/N: hey heyyyy- this is my seventeenth fic for my 30 fics in 30 days for April! This fic is based on this request- which I decided to make smutty instead of full on smut so I could make it a bit more fluffy. Disclaimer- I know nothing about motorcycles and I can’t even drive lol so sorry for the lack of terminology. This ended up being gender neutral- I checked it over for the correct pronouns a few time but I could have missed something- please let me know if so! Feel free to give me your response by sending something to my inbox here. Thanks for reading and hope y’all enjoy.

Warnings: 18+- (if you are found to be violating this I will tell writers who you are), no full on smut- in the smutty/spicy category, a bit of grinding, implications about having sex in the future, In public sexual teasing (who’s fucking surprised), hints at Sub!Spencer, A few swear words

Main Masterlist Word Count: 2.0k

Spencer hated driving. He always shook whenever he couldn’t stop the racing thoughts about the dangers of moving vehicles. He knew he was a good driver, but it was easier for him to trust the metro which stayed on its tracks (most of the time). A car with no rigid path and with so many variables just made Spencer’s mind race too much.

You were the only person that could get him to get into a car, without any sort of coercion. At his job he had accepted it as a reality of his situation; there was no way that he could get around it. He agreed to teach you how to drive to your job, which happened to be where you had met him. You ran a small thrift store just walking distance from your apartment. There had been no need to drive anywhere, until you opened up another branch on the other side of town.

You had met Spencer there, he had come in at night, just before close. He shopped around for a few sweater vests and cardigans until you had told him that you needed to close. His mumbled apology had been so cute you remember it to this day.

When he noticed that you walked home in the same direction as his, he offered to keep you company. At first you thought he had done it out of guilt since he made you stay late, until you realized he liked your presence. It was not a romantic relationship (not yet at least), you both didn’t kiss or anything, but you did love to tease him.

He cared about you, and you about him, which is why he eagerly offered to teach you to drive when you mentioned that you were scared to learn with an instructor. You preferred to be taught by someone who you knew and knew was a good driver. Spencer was just that, even with jittery fingers and tapping feet.

Since then you had become a great driver, good enough that you felt confident indulging in one of your dreams. You had always wanted a motorcycle, the wind blowing in your face and the freeing quality it had, had always made you desire one. Despite Spencer’s protests about the potential for even more safety hazards than a car you still indulged your dream, confident in your skills that Spencer had laid the foundation with his excellent teaching skills even while slightly fearful.

You had taken to it like a fish to water, it had been even easier than when you had Spencer teach you. Now it was the time to show the master how the apprentice approved, though you highly doubted Spencer liked to be called a master at driving. More like a teacher, a nervous one.

It did take some convincing for him to agree to ride on your motorcycle with you.Somehow, through gentle persuasion throughout the last few months, you had done it. He had prefaced it saying that it would be the only time it would ever happen, and you made it your goal to change his opinion. You highly doubted he’d ever want to drive it, which was fair considering he couldn’t stop the thoughts of statistics about safety in his head. You hoped though, that maybe he’d like riding with you.

“Is it safe?” Was his first question as soon as he arrived at your small thrift store you owned, jittery with nerves.

“Well- hello to you too.” You sassed cocking your hip to the side while holding your helmet in the small of your waist. He blushed bashfully, then finally said hello before you assured him, “I wouldn’t be bringing you if it wasn’t safe- I wouldn’t be driving it if it wasn’t safe.”

“Ok- I trust you.” He relaxed a little, though he was obviously still nervous.

To cheer him up a little you pivoted the conversation onto a more jovial topic, “Will you wear a leather jacket?”

“Maybe next time- if you convince me to get on the death trap again.” It was rare to see Spencer tease you back, but you thoroughly enjoyed it.

Quipping back you said, “Maybe I could get you to drive it too”

“I think I’d need training wheels for that.” A snort came out of you at that; it was funny imagining Spencer riding a motorcycle with bicycle training wheels.

“That would be a sight to see.” You swung your leg on to mount the vehicle, ready to take him on a spin. You then prompted him while getting your helmet on, “Come on pretty boy, let’s do this- and get that helmet on.”

He was a little nervous just going by the shaking in his palms, but he still put the helmet on and climbed on- albeit a bit awkwardly.

He wrapped his hands around your waist snugly when you roared the motorcycle to life. Whenever you had to break he clenched tighter, maybe not enough to leave bruises, but enough that it would be implanted in your memory for a good long while. You couldn’t see him, but you could feel him.

You could tell he had slowly relaxed a little bit more even while keeping a strong grip on you as you made your looped path charted out in your head. Starting at your store and ending at your store, it was longer than maybe it should have been, considering Spencer’s grip on you had made your arousal spark to life.

You soon realized you weren’t the only one enjoying this, feeling something slightly stiff as Spencer shifted slightly at a red light. Oh, he was enjoying it. His cock confined in his pants was growing harder as the journey progressed.

“Did you have fun?” You questioned just as you pulled back into where you started, even though you already knew he did.

He squeaked out a measly, “Yeah!”

You smirked again, out of sight from his face. Biting your inner cheek in thought, you contemplated whether or not to act on it. It would be so easy to just swivel your hips and begin to grind down on his erection that had been pressing into you during the whole ride.

Fuck it, this might be one of your only chances to make a move. You tilted your hips just a smidge, leaning back just a little into him. You heard a hitch in his breath, his hands he had around you tightening back around you, pulling you in closer.

He whimpered when you sat back a little more, testing the waters just a little further. When he himself rolled his own hips once you had to ask, “Do you want me to keep going, Spencer? Do you want this?”

His helmeted head dropped into the crook of your neck, nodding into it as he began to rock into you a little. You gripped around the handles that you were still holding, all you had done was break so far. You were both in broad daylight perched on top of the vehicle. Turning your head as much as you could when you realized he hadn’t verbally responded you prompted sharply, “I need you to speak up, pretty boy. Do you want this?”

“Yes!” He gasped quickly at your prompt.

You then ground yourself back onto his bulge, rotating yourself slowly to feel the torturous friction. The fact that your bottom halves were still clothed only made it even more devastating. No one was around as it was the weekend, when you weren’t open and no one was really around. You still tried to stifle any noises you were tempted to make as his own hips started to undulate into your own.

A person could round the corner and immediately see two people grinding like teenagers onto each other. You both may have been completely closed, but it was quite obvious what you were both doing.

The extra friction you were getting was building a burning orgasm in you, the noises you had been trying to hold back were too hard to stifle. A moan came out of your mouth when Spencer moved down his hands from your waist to the outside of your hips, pulling you down on him with even more ferocity.

When his phone then began to ring you both let out a groan, your hips stopping any movement you had been making over his hard bulge. He reluctantly pulled out his ringing and buzzing ancient phone. Which you would normally find endearing that he carried around somewhat arcane technology, but your weaning arousal was wanting you to smash it on the ground.

“Hello? Hotch?” You groaned, knowing exactly what this meant. There was no way this was going to go further tonight, Hotch wasn’t calling him on the weekend just for paperwork. He was about to leave for a case.

You ripped your helmet off of your head out of frustration while he continued to talk. Grumbling while wiping the sweat that had started to accumulate, Spencer chattering away quickly at Hotch telling him he’ll be there in about ten minutes.

When he got off the phone he began to stammer in apology, this was the only time I’d ever want to cut him off, “There’s no need to apologize- go catch a bad guy.”

“Thank you- and thanks for-r the ride and- um the other thing… I’ve got to go now, I’ll uh- talk to you later.” He then awkwardly shuffled off, trying to conceal his obvious bulge even though you were the only one around to see it.

When he got into his car, you were happy he had brought it for once. You wouldn’t have let him walk all the way to his office from here, and you would have had to drive him with his bulge pressing into your ass again.

“I’m gonna need a cold shower.” You added, mumbled underneath your back as you put your helmet back on, ready to drive back to your apartment to hopefully freeze your frustration away.

—-

The next time you saw him- about a week later, a little blush immediately graced his cheeks, probably thinking about what happened last time. You kissed his cheek and felt how hot they had gotten just by being in his presence. He was here again, early this time, ready for you to open up your shop for the day.

“You’ve got to wait 30 minutes until you can buy something, I don’t open till then,” You then flashed a smirk towards him, he might die from being overheated if you kept teasing him. Still, you continued to do it, “Can’t be seen to show you any favors, pretty boy. Then everyone would want one.” As soon as the keys turned to unlock you didn’t open the door right away, instead turning back to face him. He fidgeted even more underneath your direct gaze, also averting his eyes. You let go of your hold on the keys, bit your lip and added, “Though, I think you’d be the only one I’d want to be my favorite.

He stuttered a bit at that, before changing the subject, “Um- I came here to actually thank you for last week… I had a lot of fun.”

You then cocked your head to the side in question, “Didn’t you already thank me last time?”

“Yeah.” He responded meekly, clearing his throat a few times while he collected his thoughts. “Can we finish what we started?”

You beamed, as it had been exactly what you were hoping for. You made your way back over to him, this time to pull him by the front of his shirt to press a steaming kiss to his lips. He moaned, letting your tongue run over his teeth a few times before you deepened it further. You were panting by the time you released him, but worked through the gasping breaths to answer verbally now, “Of course- come inside with me. If you won’t go on another ride with me after this while wearing a leather jacket, I’ve got a leather jacket you can wear while I ride you.”

Ask Me Anything

—-

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[lumosinlove]

Relic Keel

(warnings in tags)

PREVIOUSLY ON RELIC KEEL

Marlene got into college and hasn’t told Dorcas because she’s scared of how she will react.

Lily and James had sex and obviously like each other, but Lily is scared to have attachments on Hogwarts when they’re going to college soon.

Leo and Logan question each other about their pasts without much progress. Logan finds out that Leo hopes to own The Lion restaurant one day, and that his father’s death has something to do with “The Voldemort.”

Saint and Sirius talk about leaving the island and how they met when they were eleven years old. They have sex and avoid more difficult topics.

James and Lily meet at the Gryffindor Club as promised. Lily tells James that she doesn’t want anything tying her to the island, that she hates the fake boundaries that Hogwarts has and that James isn’t crossing them as much as he thinks he is. James understands, even though it hurts.

Saint and Sirius are cleaning the Potter’s pool when James arrives with Remus and Luke. Remus and Sirius have a tense moment in the kitchen, Luke and Saint argue, and Sirius finds out that it’s Remus who sails the Wolfsbane every morning—Remus thus finding out that Sirius notices.

Logan returns to the Carrows to hand over his money and stock up on Crucio. We find out that he works for them in the hopes that they will help him get Finn out of Saint Clair, only the Carrows are angry with him for using their Crucio—they say that Logan owes them now.

Logan heads over to Saint Clair to watch Finn from afar, and swears again that he will rescue him.

part iv

Remus closed his eyes, soaking in the morning sun and the salty air. The wind pushed his hair back as he tightened the rigging, catching the wind. Sometimes his sails felt like his bare hands. Like he finally had something to hold onto, even if it blistered his palms. The sea made him feel alone, in the best way. Usually, it felt like people were always around. He couldn’t go anywhere without running into at least two people from school, or his parents’ friends. Yes, he’s excited for college, no, he’s not sure exactly yet, yes, he’s still sailing, yes, he’s still obsessed, yes, he remembers learning at Gryffindor Club, sure, I’ll tell my mom you say hi.

Solidarity was less exhausting.

The wind buffered and he sighed as he slowed down. he looked back towards Shack Beach. Saint had said they saw him every morning—that Sirius saw him every morning. He wondered if Sirius was watching now.

He couldn’t see anything from this far away. Part of him wondered if he could make this island disappear completely, just for a moment. But it was dangerous to stray that far. Even The Cradle, the small U of islands just off of Hogwarts’ southern coast, was pushing it. Remus huffed out a laugh as he managed the ropes to come about, back towards shore. If that wasn’t a metaphor, he didn’t know what was.

Things on Hogwarts had become complicated in what felt like overnight, even though Remus knew that wasn’t true. They were older now. They didn’t just care about summer vacation. There was college to think about, and then jobs. Hogwarts wasn’t the dream it once was. Remus wanted to see mountains, and huge cities, or snow—and not just for a week on vacation. He wanted to belong somewhere because he wanted to be there, and not just because he had grown up there. He was tired of knowing everything there was to know.

He tied up his Wolfsbane on autopilot, stroking his hand over the side before tugging his shirt over his head and jumping straight into the water. It was cooler from the night, but it was what Remus needed. He held his breath as he found the sandy bottom, his eyes closed. For a moment, he didn’t have to be anywhere. He got to enjoy the ocean and its predictable changes.

When he came up for air, he remembered why he loved this island. That still didn’t mean he didn’t want to leave.

“Are you headed to the museum, sweetheart?” his mother said when Remus came down to the kitchen, freshly showered. He preferred to let the salt linger all day, but he figured he should be fresh for his first day of work.

“Yeah,” Remus held up his keys. “Just looking for some coffee first.”

His mom held up a mug for him, laughing. “Ask and you shall receive.”

Remus smiled. “Thanks, mom.”

“How was it this morning?”

Remus poured some milk into his cup. “It was good. Sun’s going to be strong today. Went near The Cradle—not too far, don’t worry.”

“You know me too well,” Hope laughed, whisking some eggs into a lather. “Well, it’s pizza night. We’re ordering in so, if you want to have some friends over and take it to the den, that’s fine with me. But don’t complain if Jules crashes the party.”

Remus nodded. “Actually, I think we’re going out. If that’s all right?”

Hope nodded. “All right, sure. Be safe, though. Who, uh…”

“James and Luke,” Remus sighed. “Mom—”

“I wasn’t going to say anything—”

“It’s not Luke’s fault,” Remus continued anyway. “His dad, I mean. He didn’t know.”

“I know that,” Hope sighed. “But…Even I can see that boy’s hurting and I barely see him at all.”

“Then shouldn’t he be with his friends?” Remus said.

Hope raised her eyebrows at him, and Remus raised his own right back.

“All right, all right,” Hope said. “You’re gonna be late, I’ll see you later, baby.”

Remus knew he should take the car his parents had given him. He knew he should get used to driving, knew his dad wondered why it just sat in the garage. But here, on the island, Remus liked his bicycle. He liked the warm breeze. It reminded him of being out on the water.

Which, in turn, now reminded him of Sirius Black.

When Remus remembered Sirius, he mostly remembered bruised cheeks and nasty looking cuts. He remembered the hushed way people used to whisper about him, and how, even when he was loud, grinning and well-liked, he was still from Salazar. Sometimes he had eaten lunch surrounded by people, and sometimes he had eaten it alone with his brother.

Remus didn’t understand this island. Was Sirius really so different because he was born a few miles South rather than North? It made no sense—only it did, but only because it was all Remus had ever known.

The Hogwarts History Museum was a pride of the island. Remus knew it well from school trips, and from his own interest. He’d spent many Saturdays there as a kid, gazing at all of the small models of ships and dreaming about what it would be like to sail them, wishing they weren’t trapped behind glass—feeling a little like he was trapped behind glass. A ship in a bottle.

“Hi there, Remus,” Layla smiled at him, green eyes kind and skin a rich, dark brown against the pale pink scarf in her hair.

“Hi, Layla,” Remus smiled. “Having a good summer so far?”

“Sure,” Layla shrugged. “Lots of time here. I saw you win the sailing race last Sunday, congrats.”

Remus smiled. “Thanks. It was real fun. Sorry I beat your brother, though.”

“Oh, Lyle doesn’t mind,” Layla waved a hand. Her nails were painted pink, too. “Don’t worry about it.”

Remus had been friends with Layla since they were little, competing for best in class usually. She was wicked smart and mellow. Remus could always use some mellow, good conversation—especially with James being James and Luke being…well, whatever Luke was now. Layla liked history, and her family owned the museum, which meant Layla told tales that were, albeit tall, fun to listen to.

Remus leaned against the desk, looking around. “This place never changes, huh?”

Layla laughed, clicking a pen. “History doesn’t tend to change that much, R, and so neither do we. Unlike the world out there.”

“I don’t know about that. Nothing ever feels too different out there,” Remus laughed, too. “But I guess you’re right. I’m glad you’re here, though. Or else I’d be sitting behind this desk by myself.”

“I’m glad you’re here, too,” Layla nodded. “What made you take the job?”

Remus snorted as he rounded the corner, picking up his name badge where Beatrice, Layla’s mother and the museum curator, said it would be. “Don’t pretend we didn’t see each other here when we were little all the time. Not to mention at Gryffindor Club. You, obviously.”

Layla raised an eyebrow. “Me and your mom.”

Remus winced and Layla laughed.

“C’mon, we both know you’d be out on your boat all day if it was up to you.”

Remus laughed. “Fine. But seriously. You’re a perk.”

Layla nodded, rolling her eyes with a smile. “Just a couple of history buffs, I guess.”

Remus shrugged. “There are worse things to be.”

The day was pretty slow. A few tourists here and there, taking photo behind the cardboard cutouts that made you look like you were dressed as a sailor, or a pirate.

“Are there really pirates here?” one little girl had asked Layla.

Remus had smiled when Layla crouched down and whispered to her, “careful, there’s one there,” and pointed at Remus.

When lunch rolled around, Remus expected Layla to pull out a bagged sandwich like him, but instead she scoffed and picked up her bag.

“Come on. We have to get out for a bit.”

Remus shrugged. “All right, where to?”

“The Lion, of course,” Layla replied. “It’s the best food on the island.”

“The Lion,” Remus repeated slowly. “You mean—in The Hollow?”

Layla gave him a look. “Oh, you’re not one of those are you?”

“One of what?” Remus said. “No. I’m not, I just… c’mon, you hear things.”

“Hear things? You’ve never been?”

“Once,” Remus swallowed, thinking of the fight. “It didn’t really go well.”

Layla just shook her head.

“History is just one great field of stories, Remus. You’ll never get to the truth unless you listen to them all.”

And so Remus found himself riding alongside Layla on their bikes and right through Gryffindor. The Hollow didn’t have a sign or anything, but you knew when you were in it. Remus almost wished he had been able to see some sort of line to cross, but everything was just suddenly different. Low houses with open doors, people gathered together and laughing. Kids running with surfboards over their heads, towards Shack Beach. It had seemed even more vibrant in the dark the night of the party, even through the tinted windows of Luke’s car. String lights hung over cookouts, and music blasting from speakers. It had smelled amazing, and Remus would have to say Layla was probably right about the food. 

The Lion was just as bright as everything else. It was bustling with lunch-goers, and the doors were flung wide, letting the heat right in. Remus looked around at the people. Some tourists, obviously. Some not. Hollows. Some of them smiled when they caught Remus’ eye, and some narrowed their eyes.

“Hi, Leo, babe,” Layla said as she slid onto a stool at the counter.

There was a blond boy behind it wearing a tank top and a snapback. He smiled as he set some shrimp down in a frier. “Hey, Layla, babe, ça va?”

“Just working. At least I’ve got Remus for company now.”

Remus smiled awkwardly when Leo fixed his blue eyes on him. He really didn’t know what he was waiting for. Something terrible to happen?

Leo only held out a hand. “Leo, nice to meet you.”

“Remus,” Remus said, and took it. He tried not to look at the rainbow bracelet on Leo’s wrist for too long, but he could tell Leo had felt the way his hand tightened. “Yeah—you, too.”

Leo touched it briefly, like an old habit, as he pulled away, giving another smile to Remus.

It didn’t necessarily mean Leo wasn’t straight, but on such a small island, Remus tended to notice these things. He and Luke had figured each other out pretty fast around sixteen. They’d kissed. Once. And then winced, laughed, and shoved each other in the pool. Sometimes Remus wished he and Luke had worked. He didn’t see any other boys coming his way. Leo was smiling at him like he knew what Remus was thinking.

“What can I get you two?” Leo asked.

A boyfriend? Remus thought wistfully.

“Two of your specials, please,” Layla said. “Re, you’re going to lose your mind it’s so good.”

“What’s your special?” Remus asked.

Leo shrugged, but he was grinning. “Like a chef ever gives up his secrets—”

Leo had stopped mid-sentence, eyes going over their shoulders towards the door. Remus turned to look, and a moment later, a brown haired boy was slinging a backpack down carefully between his feet and taking the seat beside Remus.

“Well, look who’s back,” Leo said to him.

The boy glanced at Remus and Layla, then gave a small shrug. “Yeah.”

Leo snorted. “Yeah,” he parroted. “You’re just hungry.”

The boy shrugged again.

Leo sighed, and gave Remus a look that said, can you believe this? before turning back to the stove. “This is Logan guys. Apparently he doesn’t talk today. Three specials. Coming up.”

~

Logan didn’t recognize the boy sitting at the counter. He didn’t recognize the girl either. Then again, he didn’t recognize many people. He didn’t know anyone. Except Dorcas—if that even counted. And Leo. If that counted, either.

The Felix was heavy in his pack, wedged protectively between his feet, and he wished the strangers would leave so that Leo would talk to him. He hadn’t said two words that weren’t him making sure that Logan liked his food, and asking him where he’d been.

Logan was a little annoyed with him for asking that question. It wasn’t like Leo didn’t know what Logan did. Then again, Leo didn’t know why Logan did what he did.

“You guys get the new madness exhibit up yet, Layla?” Leo was asking the girl with the scarf in her hair. “The one you were telling me about.”

The sandy-haired boy looked up from his food. “The madness exhibit?”

The girl—Layla—cocked her head. “Remus, you…you don’t know?”

“Know what?” the boy—Remus—replied.

Layla sat up a little, looking suddenly awkward. “Your mom donated almost everything we have. I mean…it is your family that’s famous for…”

Remus raised his eyebrows. “Losing their fucking minds?”

Layla winced. “Well, yeah, okay, poor choice of words on my part. But madness isn’t always a bad thing, you know. People say people are crazy all the time. Sometimes they’re just extraordinary.”

Remus looked back down at his food. “My family’s not extraordinary, believe me.”

“Usually extraordinary-ness belongs to one person, I’d say,” Leo said. “My mom’s pretty extraordinary. Doesn’t mean I am.”

“You want to stay on this island, don’t you?” Logan found himself saying. Then, he felt his neck heat and he turned down to his food.

“What’s so extraordinary about that?” Layla replied at the same time as Remus said, “You do?”

Leo just laughed, rolling his eyes at Logan. “I’m with Layla on this one, guys, sorry.”

“What about you, Logan?” Layla asked. “I want the museum after I go to college. At least I think I do. Leo wants The Lion, Remus wants to sail the world…” Remus blushed at that, and Layla’s eyes were very green. “What do you want to do?”

Logan found it strange that they were treating him like that. So normally. Logan knew his necklace was on display. It was easier than explaining why people hadn’t seen him around and pretending to be a tourist. That lead to questions. Being abandoned didn’t. And he was. He was abandoned. People didn’t ask. Most probably thought he had just aged out. People didn’t ask. It was better that way. Logan didn’t have any answers. All he had was the memory of that last night with Finn. Finn had returned to their room, eyes wild and voice urgent.

Come on, Lo, wake up. Wake up, Logan, we have to go. Now.

Logan had felt helplessly awake in the first weeks of being out. He was still sorting through what that meant.

Logan swallowed. “I don’t know. I’m—looking for someone first.”

Remus sighed and mumbled. “Aren’t we all.”

“You are?” Leo asked softly.

Logan nodded. “Or, not looking. I’m just…I’m waiting for someone.”

He knew where Finn was, but Logan knew that he could wait forever and he wouldn’t come. Logan had to take what he wanted. It was a lesson he was learning fast.

“Oh,” Remus replied. “Um…cool. I hope you find them.”

Logan just nodded.

“Well, we should head out,” Layla said, rising. “Gotta get back to work.”

“Sure thing, just pay up front,” Leo smiled. “See you later, Layla.” He nodded at Remus. “Nice to meet you.”

“You, too,” Remus smiled back. “The food was great.”

Logan watched Leo watch them leave, then snort. “That guy looked more spooked than a horse with a snake.”

“Isn’t that what Gods are supposed to look like?” Logan replied.

Leo shrugged. “Usually you can’t see their eyes behind their aviators.”

Logan laughed a little. “Right.” he looked back down at his food, realizing he had begun picking his fries apart, rather than eating them.

“I’m looking for someone too, you know,” Leo broke the silence.

Logan did. Only, he hadn’t thought about it like that. Leo’s dad and Finn. Leo’s dad was probably dead. Finn wasn’t.

“I hope you find him,” Logan replied. “Your dad.”

The Lion was in full swing now, the lunchtime rush loud and boisterous. Leo had a tank top on, and Logan thought he looked a little tired. Sleeplessness showed easily on his skin.

“Do you have to run?” Leo asked instead of responding. “And hide? Like, from the police?”

Logan sat up, instinctively looking behind him. “I assumed I would have to. But…it hasn’t been that difficult.” He laughed a humorless laugh. “I guess I keep overestimating how much people actually care about me. Maybe I should have learned something by now.”

“Maybe you’re just looking at the wrong people,” Leo said quickly, and looked up with a smile, a small one, then down again. “I know a few others who got out. They don’t seem to have trouble, so, you know, if you needed a job or something, you could work in my mom’s workshop. With me. Or here. I’m sure Celeste and Pascal would be all right with it.”

Logan felt taken off guard. “Oh. I…” he thought of the powder packets in his bag. Of the Carrows. How much do you think you owe us by now?

Others? he wanted to ask. What others? 

“Just think about it,” Leo said, and turned towards one of the stove tops to check on some boiling water.

“Yeah. Okay.”

They sat in silence for a long moment.

“It’s a boat,” Leo began suddenly, answering Logan’s yet unasked question. The Voldemort. What his father had been looking for. It was almost like Leo was thanking him for telling the truth about his situation. An eye for an eye. A truth for a truth. Logan sort of liked that consistency. “Was a boat. In the eighteenth century.”

“Oh,” Logan said.

“Biggest story on Hogwarts,” Leo said. “Ten thousand pieces of gold, all fallen to the depths of the ocean just off of Hogwarts’ shores…and never seen again.”

“But if it’s just off the shore…”

Leo smiled a little, shaking his head. “But you have to know where off the shore. Otherwise, you have a whole circumference of miles and miles of open water to work with.”

“And your dad figured it out?”

Leo shrugged, expression closing off a little. “He thought he did.” He cleared his throat as he put an order on the counter for a waiter to take away, and ripped another piece of paper down from the line up to look at. “The Cradle. You know it?”

Logan shook his head.

“It’s a sort of…horse shoe shaped cluster of islands, just off of our southern tip.”

“Salazar,” Logan said quietly.

Leo nodded. “Salazar.”

“Your dad was a treasure hunter,” Logan said slowly. “He was looking for a treasure.”

“Yeah,” Leo said, flipping a crab cake in sizzling oil. “He was.”

“And did he find it? Do you want to find it?”

“I don’t know,” Leo whispered, busy hands stilling. “He never came home.”

Logan nodded.

“He wanted to find it,” Leo said softly. “Really badly. And I… I feel like I should.”

“And was he close?”

Leo glanced up from his knife. “Yes.”

“Leonardo,” a voice came suddenly, entering the restaurant. “What does your mother feed you, you gorgeous specimen?”

Logan froze. He knew that voice.

Leo rolled his eyes, and looked at the newcomers. “Fuck off, Saint. Hey, Sirius.”

“Hi,” a second voice came, and it was closer, almost beside Logan at the bar.

Leo’s eyes caught on Logan’s again, probably meaning to introduce him, but he stopped instead.

“What’s wrong?” Leo asked.

But Logan just shook his head, and then the newcomers—Saint and Sirius—were leaning against the bar. Logan felt the breath beside him catch just as his own had, and he turned to look.

Logan thought the boy standing beside him looked different. Older. More muscular. Squarer jaw. But the same. Same eyes. Same shock of blond hair. Same warm, brown skin.

“Logan?” Saint breathed, his eyes disbelieving.

Logan went to open his mouth, when Saint’s arms were around him suddenly.

“It’s Saint,” he said softly, just for Logan’s ears. He squeezed him tighter. “God, you’re here.”

“Saint?” Logan whispered into his shoulder. No one had touched him like this in what felt like forever.

“Yeah,” Saint said. He pulled back and raised an eyebrow. “Okay?”

Logan shrugged. “I…yeah, okay.”

“Knutty,” Saint’s serious expression morphed into a grin. He leaned against the counter, keeping his palm on Logan. “Handsome as ever.”

Logan blinked at Saint, then at Leo. “Knutty?”

Leo rolled his eyes. “Don’t listen to a word he says.”

“Oh, Logan already knows not to do that,” Saint laughed. He tapped his cross necklace. “We’re practically brothers.”

“Oh,” Leo blinked. “Right.”

The other boy—Sirius—looked just as taken aback.

“Oh, sweetheart,” Saint called in a sing-song voice, looking at Sirius. “Order for us, won’t you? And get us a table? Logan,” Saint nodded towards the door. “Come hither.”

Logan was so thankful to see Saint, he nearly tripped while getting up. A familiar face. A familiar anything. Saint had gotten out almost seven years ago. He’d been there one day, in his bed, in classes, in the courtyard, and gone the next.

“Sweetheart?” Logan asked, glancing back inside at the dark-haired boy, Sirius.

Saint just put his hands on Logan’s arms, eyes more intent than Logan had ever seen them, then on Logan’s cheeks. “Holy shit, how did you get out?”

Logan felt his heart slow, then speed up. He swallowed dryly. “Finn. How did you?”

Saint ignored the question.

“Finn,” Saint repeated, nodding. “Of course. When?”

“About a month ago. And he—he’s still in there,” Logan said. “He’s…And I’m—”

“I hear you,” Saint said. He jerked his head over to the table. “Not now. Let’s get back.”

“Saint?” Logan asked again.

Saint rolled his eyes. “Leave it alone. For now.”

~

Saint hadn’t been ready. He hadn’t seen Logan in nine years, but he’d know his face anywhere. All eyelashes and sad, green eyes. A smile he wore with Finn only. He looked spooked now, and tired. They’d sat at the bar, watching one of Leo’s shifts go and another one come, then moved to a table. Watching it get dark outside now, Saint wondered where Logan had been living for a month.

He eyed the backpack that Logan held so protectively close, and thought of the way Dorcas did the same thing.

Saint had a bad feeling.

“So, how’d you two meet?” Sirius said, gesturing between Logan and Leo with a fry when Leo brought over more water.

“Party,” Leo shrugged after a moment of hesitation. “Shack Beach.” He jerked his head at Saint. “You two were there, judging by Sirius’ shiner. Could hear that fight at my house, probably.”

Sirius rolled his eyes. “I didn’t start it.”

“True,” Saint said, wondering how he had missed Logan that night. “Some God—albeit a beautiful one—thought we were selling Crucio.”

Saint flicked his eyes over to Logan. Sure enough, he blushed.

Saint cocked his head. “The horror. Dangerous stuff.”

Leo looked at Saint quietly, and glanced at Logan, then back to him. Saint nodded. Got it, it said.

“Well, would you look who it is,” said a deep voice from behind them, and then there were two strong arms around Saint and Sirius. Pascal placed a loud kiss on each of their heads.

“Eck,” Sirius laughed. “You smell like grease, old man.”

Pascal Dumais laughed. “Grease that feeds you, maybe. And who’s this?”

“Dumo, meet Logan,” Saint said. “Logan, meet Pascal. He owns the Lion with his wife, Celeste.”

“The most beautiful woman in the world,” Pascal said, accent heavy. “Logan, it’s nice to meet you.”

Saint watched Pascal eye Logan’s necklace.

“We were together at Saint Clair,” he supplied.

“Maybe not so loud,” Logan said harshly. “Saint.”

“Oh?” Pascal said, and squinted at Logan. “Who are you with now, mon cher?”

Saint watched Logan open his mouth, frozen, and was about to speak up when—

“Me,” Leo cut in. He looked down at the carrots he was chopping as he said it. “Me and my mom.”

Oh, Saint thought.

“Oh, Leonardo,” Saint sighed. “Un ange.”

“Not my name,” Leo said.

“I know.”

“Yeah,” Logan replied to Pascal’s still questioning gaze. “Yeah.”

“I see,” Pascal nodded. “Well, I’m happy you and your mother will have a helping hand now. I miss your father dearly, mon fils.” He smiled sadly at Leo.

Leo just nodded. “Yeah.”

“Him and his treasure, eh?” Pascal said. “A wonderful man. I miss going out on that boat of his.”

Leo’s smile was small, but fond. “Those were some of his favorite mornings.”

“Treasure?” Sirius asked.

“Black!” a new voice shouted. “Thank fuck.”

Saint looked up when Sirius did. James and Remus were barreling towards them from the dark outside.

“Good lord,” Saint said. “Rain, from Olympus. Water my crops, why don’t you.”

“James?” Sirius said. “What are you—”

James and Remus walked right up to their table—Remus looking slightly more reluctant. “We have a question.”

“How did you know we were here?” Sirius raised an eyebrow. “I mean, just…it’s a little out of your way, non?”

“Remus came here earlier, and when I told him—well, you’ll see—he said maybe you’d be here.”

Saint watched Sirius’ eyes narrow at Remus, confused. “Okay…”

“Well, it’s good to see you again, tweedle-hot,” Saint said to Remus. “Up close this time. We actually though you were going to sail right out of sight this morning.”

Sirius stepped on his toe beneath the table.

“Excuse me?” Remus choked out. “What the fuck did you—”

James blinked at Saint, then shook his head, as if to right his thoughts. “All right, setting every strange thing that comes out of your mouth aside for a moment —where is Dorcas?”

“Meadowes?” Logan chimed in.

James’ eyes turned on him. “You know her?”

Saint raised his hand. “I have the same question.”

“Well,” Logan hesitated. “Sure.”

“And she sells Felix,” James said, as if trying to confirm the information.

Logan narrowed his eyes. “Says you.”

James sighed. “I’m not here to turn her in, Jesus, I just have a question.”

“Do…” Sirius was looking at Logan. “Do you sell…”

“What kind of question?” Saint cut in.

Remus spoke up. “A does-she-deal-to-Luke type of question.”

Saint laughed. “Deveaux?”

“You know who Luke is, Saint,” Remus sighed.

“Well, yeah I do, Lupin, he tried to buy off me,” Saint shook his head with a tisking sound. “Turns out he’s a prejudice piece of eye candy. Who knew.”

“Come on,” James sighed, rubbing his eyes beneath his glasses. “Please, Sirius, come on.”

Sirius shrugged. “We don’t know who Dorcas deals to. We’re not involved.”

“If you did would you tell us?”

Sirius smiled, just a little. “Probably not. But I really don’t know.”

James sighed, sagging away from the table. He looked at Remus. ��Fuck.”

“What were you hoping to accomplish here?” Sirius asked slowly.

“We—” Remus said, then sighed, too. “We were going to see if she would agree to stop. If it was her, if she would stop giving it to him.”

“We’d pay her,” James added. “Obviously.”

Saint scoffed, and Logan laughed a little, too, from beside him.

“Obviously,” Saint mimicked.

“We just meant—” Remus began.

“We know what you meant,” Sirius said.

Saint popped a fry into his mouth. “If we’ll clean your pools for a few bucks, we’ll grant you three wishes, too.”

“Jesus, Saint,” James groaned.

“Mary. Joseph—”

James ran his hands through his hair. “We’re sorry, we misspoke. We’re just trying to help our friend. His dad got taken to jail, his mom pops pills all day and night.  That’s already draining what little money the bank didn’t seize and if he wants to do anything with his life he needs a straight head. Just—fuck, we’re just asking.”

Saint prided himself on gathering information, but most of that were things he didn’t know. Luke’s dad had got taken away. But the pills? The financial distress? All of that paired with that guarded snarl the boy always seemed to wear…it almost made Saint feel sorry for Luke Deveaux. He almost said so.

Instead, he said, while twirling the cross around his neck. “Wow, he must feel like an orphan or something.”

“All right,” Remus sighed. “James, let’s just go.”

“What does he look like?” Logan said suddenly before they could turn to leave.

James looked a him warily. “Um. Sort of blond-ish. More brown-haired, I guess. Big guy, built and tall and all that. Oh, he’s got this green spot in one eye.”

Logan nodded. James raised an eyebrow. Saint waited.

“How much will you pay me to stop selling to him?” Logan finally said. He rose as he did, slinging his backpack over one shoulder. “That’s a lot out of my pocket.”

“Logan,” Saint said, but Logan didn’t look at him.

James blinked. “I—oh. Oh, uh—God, what do you want? Two hundred?”

"One grand,” Logan said.

James laughed. “Dude. Who the fuck are you? No, I don’t have that much just—on me.”

“Logan,” Saint warned again, and this time Logan did look at him. Saint shook his head softly.

“Fine,” Logan said through his teeth, and held out his hand. “Two.”

James took his wallet out and handed over the cash.

“Thanks,” Remus said from a little behind James’ shoulder. “Really.”

Logan just nodded, shoved the bills into his pocket, and headed for the door.

“Pardon,” Saint sent a grin to them all, and followed him.

Once they were outside, Saint gave him a wack on the back of the head.

“Fuck,” Logan swore. “S—”

“You get out of that shit-hole and you go around selling Crucio? To Gods?”

“I—”

“I mean, seriously, what the fuck was that? Do you know how not careful that was?”

“I don’t even know who that boy is,” Logan bit back.

Saint blinked. “What?”

Logan looked out towards the ocean where they could hear the waves crashing against the shore. “He offered to pay, and so I told him what he wanted to hear. When his friend shows up hallucinating next, that’s their problem.”

Saint scoffed. “Fine, okay, clever boy. But you do sell Crucio.”

“Felix,” Logan countered. “And yes.”

“Crucio. And no.”

Logan shrugged. “I need the money.”

“For what?”

Logan looked at him and, this time, his eyes were hard. Desperate. “For Finn.”

Saint froze. He opened his mouth, and then closed it. “Excuse me?”

“If I can get enough cash, I can get Finn,” Logan said.

Saint stared at him, and then Saint laughed. Then, he laughed louder.

“You’re shitting me,” Saint said. “You think that?”

“What do you…”

“You think you can buy Finn out?” Saint repeated incredulously. “You think you can walk back in there and buy Finn out.”

Logan took a breath. “He—”

“Logan, Jesus Christ,” Saint snapped. “You walk anywhere near that place and you are never getting back out.” Saint pressed a hand to Logan’s shoulder and shook him. “Do you hear me?”

“I need to do something,” Logan shouted back. “I need to do something, I can’t just leave him in there, he’s everything to me.”

Saint shook his head. “He got you out. Don’t waste that.”

Logan nodded, eyes bright with tears now. “And you know he got punished for it. You know he did—”

“Stop,” Saint spat, glancing around, as if anyone could hear. “Don’t.”

“You could help me,” Logan said, wiping his nose. “Bash, you got out once—”

“No,” Saint said, and turned away. “No. And don’t call me that. Don’t you ever call me that.”

“Please,” Logan begged. “Please—Saint.”

Saint whirled on him again. “I am never going near there, and neither are you. Finn’s still in there, fine. But he’ll need to get himself free like us if he wants it bad enough.”

“I owe money,” Logan began, then his breathing hitched. “I owe them, I took some of it to see—to see Finn and…Bash—Saint—”

“Them?” Saint took a step forward. “Them?”

Logan pressed a hand over his eyes, but Saint walked forward and pulled it away.

“Logan,” he said lowly. “Tell me you didn’t.”

Logan closed his eyes, mouth twisting against his tears.

“Tell me, right now, that you didn’t let the Carrows tell you they’d help you. And that you didn’t believe them.”

Logan shook his head, not in negation, but in defeat. “I need him. I need him, I’m so…I’m alone.”

Saint pulled Logan against his chest and let him cry. The sobs heaved out of him for a long while, until the collar of Saint’s shirt was wet. Until Logan was breathing softly again, exhausted, and until his voice sounded shot when he spoke.

“You’re really staying with Leo?” Saint asked, more gently this time.

Logan nodded.

“I have a place, too. Here, in The Hollow. If you want.”

“With the others?” Logan rasped.

“What others?”

“How many others are out?” Logan said softly.

Saint shook his head, fingers in Logan’s hair. “Just me, that I know of.”

“You still wear it,” Logan said, pulling back to look at him. “The cross.”

Saint let his hands drop with a last touch to Logan’s hot cheek. “So do you.”

They were both silent.

“I’m sorry about Finn,” Saint said rigidly. “I know how much he meant to you.”

Logan’s brows pulled together. “He’s not dead.”

Saint nodded. “Right.”

“Saint…” Logan began, and Saint heard the almost B instead. “Would you—just thinking about it—“

“No,” Saint said, and then turned and went back inside.

Sirius, back at the table, looked at his face, and then at his wet shirt.

“Okay?” he asked softly when Saint sat down.

“Just dandy,” Saint replied, and looked towards the door. Logan was gone.

#warnings: brief mention of drugs and past abuse and death of a father #relic keel #lumosinlove #relic keel lumosinlove #wolfstar #wolfstar fic #saint #lumosinlove ocs #Logan tremblay #Leo knut #lelo #Logan Tremblay x Leo knut #o'knutzy

[unbridgeabledistances]

prompt: domestic gallavich/being intimate in a nonsexualway bc there’s like 3 weeks til the next episode 😐

your wish is my command, anon!<3 i decided to tie this into next ep bc i simply cannot HANDLE mickey’s outfit/big gay metamorphosis & i needed to create the scene that inspired it so i wrote this

a one-shot bridging 11x06 and 11x07 in which ian and mickey talk about “gay friends,” ripped jeans, and do a bit of processing along the way

tw for brief mention of homophobia/abuse (bc terry lol)

--

“How come we don’t have any, like, gay friends?”

Ian looked up from where he was laying on the ground, breathing heavily after a series of push-ups, a nightly routine that he was trying to keep intact even though he and Mickey were practically driving the entire circumference of Chicago every day to make weed deliveries from dawn til dusk, leaving them both exhausted. It had been a week since all the shit with Terry, and a month or so since he and Mickey had started the security gig; while months ago their evenings would be spent sitting side by side on the bed in a brittle silence while Ian read or scratched in his notebook and Mickey played games on his phone blasting at full volume in the pajamas he’d been wearing all day, these days the evenings in their bedroom were softer and warmer— like they were settling into the space together, like they were both on the same team instead of constantly clashing and butting heads while trapped in a too-small space. These days, after having dinner in the clamor of the crowded kitchen, he and Mickey would head upstairs and change out of their uniforms, and Ian would work out while Mickey mostly just lounged on the bed, sometimes making commentary and watching him bob up and down with a pensive smirk or scrolling through his phone.

But tonight, Mickey was quiet— his eyes flickered to the curves and edges of Ian’s torso every now and then as Ian broke a sweat, but otherwise he wasn’t playfully poking and prodding like usual.

Mickey had been a lot quieter in general this week, after all the stuff with Terry— Ian knew seeing the source of all of Mickey’s trauma in a wheelchair immobile from the neck down, the most vulnerable Terry could have been, felt worse than someone repeatedly twisting a knife in Mickey’s abdomen. But beyond the initial shock and the almost-murder and lugging him up the stairs, having Terry in a wheelchair twenty feet away did something deeper to Mickey. This whole situation shifted something solid that had been lodged in the pit of Mickey’s stomach for years— Ian could see it, and he fucking hated it. He hated Mickey’s glassy contemplative eyes as he looked out the car window while they drove to a new dropoff location, lost in his head when he thought Ian wasn’t looking. He hated the tightly wound tension between Mickey’s shoulder blades as he slept, curled into himself and twisted in the comforter, facing away from Ian on the other side of the bed. He hated the tight smiles Mickey gave him as he made some offhand joke about Terry when they could hear him cursing and shrieking through the open front windows, smiles that were trying to prove something outwardly but showed the barbed pain stinging at Mickey’s insides. Ian poured out what he could in soft touches, in skims of fingertips at the breakfast table and in an arm over Mickey’s waist while they slept; but he could only give as much as Mickey would take, and for most of the week Mickey had shut everyone out with iron walls.

Ian couldn’t imagine what was stirring in Mickey’s mind; he’d seen some of Mickey’s trauma firsthand, sure, and some of the stories about Terry came slipping through the cracks when Mickey’s guard was down— mostly on those late nights when they both couldn’t sleep and Mickey whispered into the crook of Ian’s neck as they were curled into each other, cradled in the dark silence of their bedroom. But Ian knew there was deeper shit that he hadn’t heard about, and he could see the constant fear of Mickey’s adolescence hanging heavy around his neck all these years later. But Mickey didn’t need anyone to push his walls down— Ian knew he’d open up when he was ready.

Which is why this random question, the most direct statement Mickey had really made to him all week, caught Ian off guard. He sat up, folding his arms over his legs and staring up at where Mickey was slouching on the bed, propped up by a pillow he’d shoved between his back and the wall. “Gay friends?” he asked, more than a little confused.

Mickey cleared his throat. “Yeah, gay friends, y’know. Like all your youth center queers that came to the wedding or whatever.” He suddenly looked down and picked at a fraying thread on his shirt sleeve, not meeting Ian’s eyes.

Ian raised an eyebrow in curiosity. This was random, sure, but Mickey wouldn’t have brought it up if something wasn’t weighing on him, bubbling up after all the events of this week.

“I don’t know— I guess since the pandemic and stuff, I haven’t really kept in touch with Geneva or any of those guys who came to our wedding. We only really talked after I got out of prison because of all the Gay Jesus publicity bullshit, but after you got out I wasn’t really thinking about that as much.”

Mickey blew out a breath, so quietly Ian barely noticed it. Ian stood, wiping his sweaty forehead and plopping down on the bed next to Mickey, folding his legs so their knees were almost touching— but still giving him space, still letting him breathe.

“Why’re you asking?”

“Don’t know, really. Just thinkin’.” Mickey picked at his shirt sleeve again, then flickered his gaze up to meet Ian’s eyes, two clear pools of glassy blue. “Thinkin’ about what life could’ve been like. If I wasn’t scared shitless of who I was for so long.”

Ian felt something twist in his gut, the same queasy pang of pain that always resurfaced whenever he saw Mickey like this, whenever he was reminded of all the unspeakable agony that Terry had put him through.

“It’s fucked up that you didn’t get to be who you were for so long, Mick,” he breathed, knowing that statement didn’t cover the amount of things that were fucked up about this situation.

Mickey ran his teeth over his bottom lip, like he was concentrating. “Yeah.”

Ian let them sit there for a second. It seemed like Mickey wanted to say more, but something in him was frozen solid. After a moment, Ian tried to break the tension.

“Hey, for the record, I’ve had lots of gay friends and you aren’t missing much. There’s lots of PC bullshit that’s important but took me fucking forever to learn— and even then, I never really felt like I totally belonged.” He gently nudged Mickey’s ribcage. “I guess that’s why I forgot about everyone, between work and getting to be with you all the time— I’d rather eat pizza in the mall food court with you than go to some boujee fucking café with the youth center people any day.”

The corner of Mickey’s mouth ticked upwards slightly. “Yeah. Guess you’re right.” His fingers went slack around the threads on his shirtsleeve he’d been picking at. “You don’t… miss it though? Bein’ around people who’re like us?”

Ian paused for a moment, imagining the youth center crew in the same room as Mickey— it would be fucking comical, like people speaking two different languages, like astronauts trying to communicate with aliens on Mars through gestures and confused looks. But that was just because Mickey didn’t know how to speak that language— he’d been kept shrouded in an abusive household with daily death threats for years, and then stowed away in prison where he didn’t have the chance to go to fucking brunches and clubs and education events like Ian could. Ian got the chance to learn all that shit— it wasn’t Mickey’s fault that he never did, and if it was anyone’s, it was all Terry’s.

Ian’s eyes flickered to Mickey’s face— he looked vulnerable and split open, like he was drifting away in all the possibilities of what could have been. When he answered, Ian spoke softly, carefully.

“I mean… I guess I do. There were nice parts of going out with people, or even those after-parties back when I used to work at the club. There’s something nice about being with your people, where you can make jokes about stuff or talk about deep shit and everyone’s on the same page. It’s hard to find that around here.” Ian tentatively crawled his hand over the blanket, letting it rest on Mickey’s knee. “S’there anything else going on?”

Mickey raised his thumb to his mouth, biting at a hangnail contemplatively. “Dunno, man. Just thinking. How it might be nice, to have friends like us. I used to be scared of hangin’ with other queers, but I think that was just some deep bullshit with Terry.” He looked up to meet Ian’s eyes. “It’d be nice to stop… hating that part of myself, or whatever.”

Ian smiled, reaching to intertwine his fingers with Mickey’s and tracing a pattern with the thumb that was free from their grasp on Mickey’s inner thigh, a soft touch of validation that Ian hoped would soak into Mickey’s skin.

“I think so too.” Ian watched the corner of Mickey’s mouth curve upwards. “I can definitely hit up some of the people I used to hang with, and see if they wanna get coffee or something? With the two of us? Only if you want.”

Mickey nodded— then chuckled a breathy laugh, like he was relieved. “Fuck it. Yeah.”

Ian couldn’t help it; Mickey looked so fucking sweet and so relieved that he had to press a kiss to the top of his head. Mickey squirmed underneath him, bristling like a cat that didn’t want to be pet like he did with most of Ian’s soft touches— but Ian just grinned and doubled down, pressing another slower peck onto Mickey’s temple. Mickey blew out a slow breath.

“Don’t know what I’d fuckin’ wear to a brunch with a bunch of Northside do-gooder gays,” he said after a moment, his voice wavering so slightly that no one except Ian would have noticed.

Ian rolled his eyes fondly, giving Mickey’s hand a quick pulse of a squeeze. “Mickey, are you kidding? Wear whatever the fuck you want. You don’t need to change yourself, that’s kind of the whole point.”

“Yeah. Fuck. Guess it is.” Mickey was quiet for a moment, but still chewing on his bottom lip, like he was building the courage to say something more. Ian could tell— he let the comfortable silence hang between them, knowing that Mickey would break it when he was ready.

“D’you think it’d be stupid if I, like, tried to… jazz up my look a bit?” He darted his eyes nervously to Ian’s face, down to their clasped hands, and then back to the covers again. “Like, uh— I don’t know. Maybe wore some shit that didn’t have holes in it. With patterns, or whatever.”

Ian felt his face split into a grin. Patterns, or whatever— god, he loved his dumbass husband so fucking much. He pressed another kiss to Mickey’s cheek— this time Mickey didn’t flinch away, his only resistance a forced roll of his eyes.

“Mick, I don’t think that’s stupid at all. I think you should dress however makes you feel good.”

“’Kay.” Mickey pursed his lips, like he was still hesitant. Ian rubbed his thumb over the back of Mickey’s hand, their fingers still clasped and hanging limply in Mickey’s lap. The silence was hanging again, and Ian could still feel the tight waves of anxiety bouncing off of Mickey. He took in a breath.

“I could… help you, y’know. If you wanted to dress a certain way. At the very least I could gas you up and tell you how hot you look.” Ian paused, smirking and running his eyes over Mickey’s torso. “But I could also help you pick shit out, or whatever. We could order some stuff online.”

Mickey looked up at him, his eyes oddly relieved and open in a way they hadn’t been in days. “Yeah?”

Ian softly smiled. “Yeah. Only if you want to. You’re you, and you don’t have to pretend to be anyone else. I love the way you look— hell, it drives me crazy, Mick. But— if you feel like you aren’t dressing the way that makes you feel the best, or like you’re putting on an act for other people and you don’t want to anymore— then we can figure this out.”

This time it was Mickey that initiated affection, lifting their clasped hands and pressing a quick ghost of a kiss to Ian’s wrist. Ian smiled in acknowledgement, then playfully raised his eyebrows. “You wanna look online now? I’m done working out and more than happy to help you gay up your look.”

Mickey unclasped their hands, playfully shoving Ian squarely in the chest. “Fuck you.” Then, in an uncharacteristic move from the way Mickey had been flinching away from his touches all week, Mickey leaned in closer to Ian’s chest, nestling his back on Ian’s sternum and reaching for his phone that was discarded on the blanket beside him. “Alright, hot stuff. Where’re we fucking shopping?”

Ian grinned and snapped the waistband of Mickey’s sweatpants playfully, shuffling underneath him and getting comfortable.

“’Kay, let me think. I used to order a bunch of shirts and stuff from Primark when I was going out with the youth center people. They have good denim, too.”

Mickey’s bottom lip was caught between his teeth again while he listened. He hesitated for a moment, his thumb hovering over the phone’s keyboard— then, in an automatic movement, he quickly shoved his phone into Ian’s hand, cheerfully wriggling back into Ian’s chest. Ian smirked and unlocked the phone, happy to take the reins— online shopping for fashion was clearly lightyears out of Mickey’s comfort zone.

Ian navigated over to the Primark homepage, plastered with torsos of toned models wearing striped button ups and ripped jeans. His thumb pressed down onto the “denim” tab, and he started to slowly scroll through the rows of options, holding the phone so Mickey could see.

“I don’t know what you really want, but they’ve got pretty cheap pants and shit that’re good quality…” Ian let his voice trail off, speaking softly to where Mickey was lying on his chest in a voice that he knew was tickling the shell of Mickey’s ear. Mickey almost seemed… nervous, or at the very least paralyzed by the wealth of options. He raised his thumb to his mouth, anxiously biting the hangnail again.

“I guess those ripped ones don’t look too bad.”

Ian clicked on the picture Mickey was referring to. They were black jeans, a dark wash and skinny cut, with patches ripped on both knees. Ian felt something well in his chest, probably an overreaction to a pair of jeans— but these jeans were perfect for Mickey. They weren’t too much, weren’t overly fashionable, but they still felt more clean-cut than the baggy pants Mickey usually threw on. These jeans were badass, and totally aligned with Mickey’s don’t-fuck-with-me vibe, but they were deliberate. Stylish. Like they were saying here the fuck I am.

“Yeah?” Ian knew Mickey could tell he was smiling from his voice.

Mickey smirked, craning his neck and turning to look up at Ian. “Yeah. Think I can pull ‘em off?”

Ian pressed his lips together. “Fuck yeah. You’re gonna look so good.”

Mickey just gave a satisfied smile, and nestled back against Ian’s chest again. “Let’s get ‘em, then.”

#i hope u enjoy!<3 #also im sorry I’ve been so mia in regards to prompts #my mom’s been in the hospital all week and it’s just been a very tough and draining time #but writing this brought me so so much joy! #gallavich #gallavich fic #shameless #shameless fic #ian x mickey #ian gallagher #mickey milkovich #shameless season 11

[remsmoonlight]

— title : point of view

— word count : 3k words

— pairing : daryl dixon x reader

— summary : tomorrow is something that is never promised, less so when the dead walk the Earth. being trapped for the night when a storm pours down upon you and daryl while trapped in a decrepit house by a few walkers are you sick and tired of hiding what you feel.

— warnings : some swearing, talk of potential death ( of the reader ) , a wee bit of angst that turned into more at the end :)

note: omg another daryl oneshot i gotta chill ajksajksk, but i had like seven main bullet points i made to follow when writing this and i followed like...... two, three at the most, anyways.... enjoy? this is brought to u by ariana’s discography lmao oops it does be cute at some point tho ... also felt a bit hsm with that one line at the end ahaha but fr lemme stop talking now

      ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*   requests are open !   *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Dark and gloomy clouds swirl over your head, blending into an extremely large and angry looking ready to descend from above. You wonder to yourself just how long you have left before the loud cracks that crumble through the air to accompany the forceful winds and pouring drops of rain are finally released. Halfway through the trip back from the town that lays after miles from the prison the car used decided it preferred to lay quietly in the middle of the road, shortly after the sickly sputters from the engine you heard Daryl mutter a few curse words. You were unable to hold in your amusement, despite the fact that a lack of transport obviously leaves you in a vulnerable position, it felt like it was your luck for that to happen to you.

It’s why you stay behind following the hunter in silence.

Studying him with focused eyes you can’t help but wonder how he never realises when you’re unable to tear your gaze away from him. In the beginning when you began to develop a certain affection for him you had been glad, for it to be too embarrassing for the thoughts you had about him in your head. In spite of this, when you realised that it was much more than a crush did you wish for him to mind read, because you have no idea just how to approach him about such a sensitive topic and while he can be tender about feelings, it’s also his downfall.

“ it’ll be gettin’ dark soon, there should be some houses down there to spend the night in. “

You stop in your tracks with a curious look that bled so suddenly into your features you had no time to stop it.

“ you don’t want to carry on? I mean, we’re not far from home? “ you question him with a hint of fear coddling your words.

“ we’d be trippin’ over our feet. Let’s back it back in one piece, yeh? “

Nodding, you regain your pace. It’s been a few months since you’d been hopping from one house to the other during that harsh winter, the bare thought of having to stay in yet another frail structure sent a chilly hand drawing its claws deeply up your spine. If you never had your group, you don’t think you would have made a winter like that, barely protected from the elements and the walkers that wished to plunge their teeth cavernously into your flesh.

“ as long as we leave as soon as the sun comes up. Please. “ you plead, your words filter off into a gentle volume from your position.

Leaves crumble and buckle underneath the weight, the sound of crickets dominate your surroundings as the two of you walk in silence. You itch to start a conversation, but the fear of distracting the man and annoying withhold the words that wish to fall from your lips, even then you don’t know how to begin. What would you say? There’s not much to talk about in a world where the dead have risen, where they wish to drag the world into decomposition.

Your wandering mind is pulled from its very own depths from a noise coming from Daryl, he’d turned to catch your attention. You both set to work attempting to enter any of the abandoned houses, hoping one had been left unlocked at some point.

Of course, luck is scarce. Despite there not being a soul who occupies them, they’re still somehow locked. Mournfully, you wonder if the owners of these homes had thought the governments and armies would eventually lock everything under their control, to the point that there would be a house for them to come back to? Your heart thuds painfully in your chest to think about what happened to them, and if they’re even still surviving.

A large thud draws you back to the present, the wooden door splinters at the force Daryl puts into a large kick to its frame.

“ well, there goes the lock. “ you mutter humourously, lifting the heavy bag higher up onto your shoulders as you walk in the open door.

“ we’ll put the couch there, stop any unfriendly types that come our way. “

“ I don’t know if there’s anyone left anymore. “ you reply, dropping the bag to the floor and moving towards the couch.

Situated on the other side of it, you grip the plush handle and lift with a struggle. It’s a strain to get it through the doorway to  turn it around the corner, but eventually it happens. Daryl is joined by your presence by his side, you both push ⏤ this time it’s an easier feat with two of you on one side to dedicate your strength and weight to advance it.

As soon as you finish, a heavy crackle cuts through the air.

“ we got here just in time, huh? “

“ just about. “ he answers you, sparing a glance before moving through the lower floor ⏤ searching for anything that can be taken back to the prison.

Thunderstorms had never been your favourite thing growing up. Of course, rain was something that calmed you from the anxieties life brought, but the thunder and lightning is what you loathed. Never knowing when you were about to receive a fright from the loud rumbles and flashing lights ruined the whole experience for you.

The rustling Daryl makes is the only thing that brings you comfort in this moment, keeping you grounded and away from your thoughts. It doesn’t escape your notice that these houses feel no more than graveyards with the memories that have no use to live, instead haunting the structures with what could have been had chaos and death not taken over. You climb the stairs, hugging your sides as you refuse to touch the handrail leading up stairs.

There is a middle room with access granted without having to push open the door to gain entry. Your eyes scan the room’s interior, even with the dust and grime that bespeckle its surfaces, you can still see its beauty. Now, who does that remind you of? Your mind cheekly thinks before you banish it into the shadows of your brain, where you know it will force itself out with an immense stubbornness.

Despite the thunder booming in the distance frequently, you can’t help but admire the beauty of rain drops falling to the ground with a dainty grace only it holds. The sky continues to grow dimmer, only seeing the rain on your level and lower, no street lights flood the street to aid you in being able to see torrent from above. Jumping at another roar of sound from the storm, your heart begins to pick up its pace, so much you don’t realise Daryl joining you in the room.

“ scared? “

Turning around with such speed that leaves you surprised whiplash did not greet you, Daryl is left smirking at your reaction.

“ yeah, I hate these things. “ you respond, a bitterness coating each word heavily as you speak.

“ more than walkers? “ he questions you, as he shifts his weight from one foot to the other.

“ well, I suppose not that much .. “ another clap of thunder interrupts you, the rain beating harder and harder on the windows of the bedroom. “ can we talk about anything? This shit really grates on my nerves. “

“ what y’wanna talk about? “

Your mind stalls, with the previous thoughts that had been swirling in a state of disorder your draw a blank. A continuous thump downstairs interrupts your shrug, speeding down the stairs you realise a few walkers are trying to enter the property, of course their lack of intelligence fails to realise they’re throwing themselves into the walls and not the blocked doors.

“ shall we take them out? “ moving closer to the lengthy curtained window next to the door to get a better look, you can see three walkers hauling themselves mindlessly against the structure.

“ nah, the storm’ll get ‘em soon enough. “ he shakes his head softly, your mind taking note of the lack of proximity between your bodies as he repeats your action. “ no need to risk ourselves. “

“ wouldn’t be the first time you’ve risked your life. “

“ s’nothin. “ he contradicts gruffly, wiping a finger across his nose at your words. He truly doesn’t view it as that, refusing to think of it as risking his life. To Daryl, it doesn’t feel like risking everything to help the people around him, it’s not something he can find the words to explain but all he knows if there’s a chance, he would do it again and again.

“ Daryl Dixon, so humble. “ you speak warmly with a gentle smile threading itself into your features. “ you need to give yourself more credit. “

“ stop. “

“ you’re as brave as anyone in the group. I’d say braver than Rick. “ you joke, setting yourself from the entryway to the sitting room. “ although, if I had to choose you and Carol .. I’m sorry, but Carol every time! “

“ damn woman frightens me. “

Laughter light in weight dances airily between you with an elegance in its movement. For even a fraction of a second you forget that there are walkers that are itching to break through into the property, that there’s an angry storm that threatens to demolish whatever stands in its path, because right now it’s only you both here and now in this one room.

“ she’s come a long way. “ you agree, pulling a lone chocolate bar from your bag. Your favourite and you’re thanking the universe that it hasn’t spoiled yet. Turns out all these preservatives and chemicals have some use after all you note to yourself as half is offered to the man standing across from you.

“ so have ‘yuh. “ he acknowledges, taking the broken half of the candy from you.

“ I think we all have to be honest. I don’t think any one of us are the people we used to be. “

“ now who’s humble? “ Daryl asks, his tone light in relaxed merriment. He’d long since taken note of the transformation you’d gone through, he’s never seen you so strong as a person before.

“ don’t you turn this round on me, Dixon. “

The two of you fall silent, you direct your gaze to the window and the raindrops that litter the window pane’s surface. The harsh noises thundered no more, leaving a calm pitter of precipitation to fall with no interruption. From your position on the second couch, you wrap around a thin decorational blanket around your arms, leaning your cheek against the palm of your hand.

Pretending the world hasn’t gone to hell, that it’s just a normal evening where you’re admiring the scene before you. Skies that weep heavily is what the Georgian greenery has been calling out for, especially since the warmer temperatures have returned in full force. Switching your line of sight to Daryl, you feel a mellowness in the pit of your stomach as you watch him fondly. You can’t be sure if it’s the lack of distractions or eyes from your group, but you feel a miniscule spark of confidence within your confines.

“ come sit down, you can relax for a bit. “ you call, trying to convince him lightly. Your hand moves to pat the seat next to you.

“ can’t relax in this world. “ despite the disagreement in his words he does move towards your position on the plush seat.

“ it doesn’t mean we can’t make it. Otherwise we’d be burnt out, I’d hate to see that happen to you. “ You divulge as you reply to him, little inklings of hope in your tone.

“ y’don’t gotta worry ‘bout me. “

“ but I do, Daryl. “ you groan as a dull glumness contorts your features into something new. “ I mean, the lengths you go to .. you scare me to death. “

“ don’t be dumb. “ Daryl warns lowly as he shakes his head, few have shared their vulnerability with him. Perhaps only Carol, his mind can’t wrap itself around the fact that people genuinely care for him. Growing up, he’d been taught of it as a weakness. Something that should not exist, no one cared when he went missing for a short while as a child, and now having people who show him the opposite? It leaves a strange feeling to settle within his heart.

“ please, I need to tell you. I mean, I might not even be here tomorrow. “

“ nah, don’t say that. Y’will. “ he argues, he doesn’t even want to entertain the notion of not seeing you even for a day ⏤ let alone forever.

Truthfully, you’d not been particularly close. He understands it now, he pushed everyone away wherever he had the chance to. But after the downfall of the farm? You wouldn’t let up in trying to forge bonds that could rival even the strongest of metals. You had no idea, but he’d overheard you talking to Beth one day. When you said you didn’t want to be afraid of living, to have something worth dying for. That struck him deep.

“ neither you or I can guarantee that. Now, call me selfish but I can’t die with what ifs in my brain. “ you explain, you know it’s probably selfish to announce any kind of fondness for a person nowadays, because you can be ripped from their existence without any kind of announcement. But if you were to depart from the realm of the living, you’d want to have affectionate memories to experience and for them to look back on.

“ what y’sayin? “

Your eyes well up in frustration, whether it’s over the way you find the words are hiding beneath your tongue like cowards under the cloak of night or over the fact that you have begun this topic of conversation, backing yourself into a corner. There’s so much you want to say but how you should is not coming easy. Eloquence in your words is something you find yourself yearning for with all of your being should it bring you a happy ending to this discussion.

This isn’t a fairytale, there’s no happy or bad endings in real life you sorely think. There’s just reality, and the conclusions for that are neither black or white.

Fingertips grip the roots of your hair for a fleeting moment before letting go as if you’d never clutched them in exasperation at all.

Shutting your eyes so hard they hurt, you muster up the courage to speak the truth you’ve locked away in your heart, allowing it the light it has been deprived of for so long.

“ Daryl, I ⏤ “ your voice shuts off with a painful sound, sighing as if to psych yourself up. “ I feel more for you than I probably should. “

When Daryl says nothing, you open your eyes. Your entire being preparing yourself for the worse answer, this moment may hurt now but the pain will lessen. At least your soul feels lighter with the hidden information no longer chained to it as a burden, no longer will it have to be weighed down by its mass.  

“ I know it’s probably not what you want to hear, but I couldn’t keep it in any longer. “

“ who said I didn’t wanna hear? “

“ ⏤ what ? “ you question, your brows falling lower as you squint in disbelief. You wonder if your brain is forming a false memory to protect itself later on.

“ y’don’t nothin’ to do with me though. “ he hesitates, the automatic response to push away anything good that comes his way to the furthest reaches. “ nothin’ but trouble. “

A sorrowful smile full of grief clouds your features, your unshed tears threaten to fall. If only he could see himself from your point of view, he doesn’t see just how admirable of a human being he is. Yes, he has his flaws but who doesn’t? In all of humanity, you don’t think there has ever been a perfect person, but it’s how they approach their downsides that shows the peak of their humanity, that they don’t let the darkness fester in their heart, to poison their soul into becoming a shell of a kind hearted person. That shows the strength of their character.

Daryl? You feel honoured to have been a first hand witness to see him turn from a hot ball of anger to a softer, kinder soul.

“ Daryl, you really don’t see what I do.” you forsake everything, leaning forwards and laying your hands across his. Taking in the immense warmth from them. “ That? It hurts me, because you’re rather amazing. “

Saying nothing, Daryl looks down at your intertwined hands. He wants the chance that’s being offered, though the fear of being the one who poisons everything he lays his touch upon settles heavily on his shoulder. No one has come out unscarred when dealing with a member of the Dixon family, his family tree being nothing more than toxic, with weeds that wrap around the limbs of the poor fool who got involved with them, as they drag them to their lowly depths. He doesn’t know how to let go of the past and for this he continues to pay, with the high price being his happiness in the present world. No response leaves his lips, for the first time in a long time he doesn’t know what to say, while knowing what he wants to say. It’s not until he feels arms wrapped around the top of his shoulders is he brought back down to Earth, a shudder of a breath is released from him as he realises what is going on. The action is reciprocated in earnest, you’re full of gratitude that he’s accepting your comfort ⏤ knowing it could have been a gamble of a decision, a fifty fifty chance of him reacting negatively or positively. You, too, draw comfort from the position you both find yourself, clutching the other. Hope dawns on your heart, knowing Daryl is not a particularly affectionate man. This means a lot, for it’s a leap for you both.

“ thank you. “ he whispers in the night. You know that this is the start of something new.

#daryl dixon imagine #daryl dixon x reader #daryl x reader #daryl dixon oneshot #daryl imagine #twd imagine #the walking dead imagine #twd oneshot #daryl oneshot

[iamyoursinblog]

Everything that you dream about

Pairing: Jeon Jungkook x Reader x Kim Taehyung

Genre:  smut

Word Count:  7,3 k

LIST

___________________

Pov you

“Damn it…” you growled, resting your forehead against the wall of the shower stall. And why were you hoping that a cold shower could extinguish the heat between your legs that these sexy, even too for their age, guys.. You spent most of the day alone with Taehyung and Jungkook shopping. But after you arrived at the house, it turned out that your room is next to Jungkook. You leaned your back against the wall and slid to the floor. Closing your eyes, you remembered the guys training on the street. Every time they trained, you just melted, but today when you saw Taehyung and Jungkook boxing together ... It was hot !!! Too hot !!!

You shook your head, banishing the depraved thoughts from your head. It seems that you forgot that you went to the shower to cool off, and not even more turned on thinking about them. You laughed, but it sounded more like a mockery of yourself. How could you fall in love with them both? You got out of the shower and quickly dried yourself off. Looking around, you realized that you didn’t take any clothes, except for underwear. You looked at the washing machine in which your clothes were washed, and ran your hand over your face. You squeaked in frustration as you looked at the wet towel on the floor. You decided that if you quickly run to the bedroom no one will see you, besides how did you know all the boys were going to cook in the upper house.

You stuck your head through the doorway, listening to the sounds, but you were met by silence and you were glad of it. You quickly picked up your phone, and checking your messages, headed into the room. You entered the room and sighed with relief. You stood in the room laughing because of the correspondence in the general chat between friends.

"What's so funny there?" the too familiar voice took you by surprise.

You jumped from surprise putting the phone on the floor. You looked towards your bed and Jungkook was sitting on it. Your eyes widened, and he sat resting on the guitar and watched you with joy in his eyes.

“Yaayy… you scared me, my heart almost stopped! What are you doing in my room? " you shouted at him

He laughed out loud, “Sorry nuna. I didn't mean to scare you. But here's the thing ... this is my room "he sent you a dangerous smile. You looked around and there were Jungkook's things was everywhere. You stumbled upon the mirror and your heart fell to the floor sorting out billions of millions of pieces. You were so discouraged, that you completely forgot that you were standing only in transparent underwear. You wanted to hide behind or run out of the room, but your body was paralyzed and refused to move. You slowly turned your eyes from the mirror to Jungkook, who watched your every move with curiosity and lust, or rather the absence any movements.

“I… I’m better… sorry…” it seems that not only the ability to move, but also to speak has left you. You took a step back before turning. Turning to the door, for the second time in 5 minutes, a terrible fear gripped you when you met the eyes that watched you in surprise. Taehyung stood in the doorway, leaning against the wall.

“I think I almost missed all the fun. I didn't really want walk to you, but you forgot the phone on the desk, so I had to come down here" he said they believe in the hands of Jungkook's phone. He looked at Jungkook for a second, and you heard a quiet laugh behind your back. your body, eagerly examining every inch, which made your skin goose bumps. "I'll have to thank Yoongi for making me go downstairs," he said, closing the door behind him.

You have to say something, or better - leave. So why did you stand as if you were frozen. In your thoughts, you practically fainted from this whole situation. You, Taehyung and Jungkook. In same room. And you almost naked. WTF! “This is not what you think. Just because I was looking at the phone, I accidentally mixed up the rooms. This is all just an accident. " You tried to justify why you are in Jungkook's room.

Taehyung smiled broadly, "Isn't that your favorite phrase,‘ accidents aren’t accidents? ” you heard a noise behind you as Jungkook got out of bed and stood behind you.

“Exactly! You always repeat it! " Jungkook laughed.

“This is not the same case.” You quickly replied and tried to step towards the door, but Taehyung blocked your path.

“Really? Let's see ... I like you, Jungkook like you, and I know you like us. And now we are all three in the same room and you look sexy as hell. ” Taehyung took a step towards you and you had to step back.

“Don't you find it exciting?” Jungkook asked you, and you felt hot breath on your back.

“No,” you answered, barely audible.

"Something improbable no, don't you think so, Jungkook?" Taehyung took another step towards you, and you took a step back and rested your back on Jungkook's chest.

“It sound more to agree than to refuse,” Jungkook whispered in your ear, and your body trembled.

Taehyung raised his hands and placed them on Jungkook's shoulders, which left you trapped between their bodies. You hated yourself for being so horny now. Your brain seems to have completely shut off as their scent enveloped you. Taehyung tilted his head to meet your eyes, his face too close. "Don't you want to know how this might end?"

Of course, you wanted this, more than anything in this world…. But you couldn't give in to your desire. Despite the fact that you dreamed about it every second of your life, from the moment you started working with them. You lost count of how many times you masturbated while imagining a scene like this in your dreams. Therefore, it was only natural for your body to tremble so trapped between their bodies. Taehyung ran his fingers over your face, and his face began to approach yours. You felt his hot breath on your lips ...

A phone call rang out that distracted you and reminded you exactly where you are and how many cameras are around. You are in luck, since you were the one doing the video processing. You pushed Taehyung away and ran out of the room before they could tell you anything. You quickly ran into the room and, putting on the first thing that came to hand, ran out of the house. There was only one thought in my head that you should leave this house as soon as possible. You were running so fast to the car that you almost hit Namjoon, who came out of the corner.

"It feels like a fire has started somewhere." Namjoon laughed seeing your confused look.

"What? Fire? What are you talking about? " you tried to sound calm.

“You ran as if you were running from the fire. Didn't you say you were staying with us for dinner tonight? " he frowned

“Sorry Namjoon. Something happened, I need to get back today. Let's have dinner some other time. ”You quickly walked over to the car and sat inside. You looked at the work phone on the seat and remembered that your personal phone was left on the floor in Jungkook's room. You looked up and saw Taehyung and Jungkook walking towards you. You quickly started the car and drove away.

POV Taehyung

"And what was that?" he turned towards Jungkook when you ran out of the room.

"Aren't you the one who ruined everything?" Jungkook raised an eyebrow.

“If the phone hadn’t rang… I didn’t ask about that. Why was ______ only wearing underwear in your room? "

"She said that she accidentally entered my room."

"But why in underwear?"

"I'm sorry hyung, but she didn't have time to explain to me why she was only wearing underwear." Jungkook smiled and they both laughed.

Taehyung shook his head, and what he could only hope for doing this in a room full of cameras. One thing reassured him that he knew that it was you who was in charge of editing, so most likely half an hour of recordings from this house would "accidentally" disappear. A wave of excitement passed through his body when the image of your gorgeous body, covered only with a small piece of transparent fabric, appeared in front of his eyes again. There were too many thoughts in my head, and only after a while did it appear among them that he needed to talk to you. He left the room and went to yours, but it was already empty ... Jungkook followed him without uttering a word, he knew that the makne was also confused by this whole situation that had just happened. He left the house and headed towards the parking lot. But he only had time to see your back when you were talking to Namjoon, and then you quickly got into the car. He met your gaze and his heart stopped, your face was a mask that could not be read. It has been a long time since he felt the fear of ruining everything. He froze in place when your car drove away abruptly. Jungkook bumped into him because he was staring at you the whole time and didn't even notice that Taehyung had stopped.

"Sorry hyung." Jungkook quickly apologized

He just nodded his head back, not saying a word.

"Have you two already ruined everything?" Taehyung turned to Yoongi's voice from behind.

"I don't know what you're talking about, hyung," Taehyung quickly replied.

“Ohh, good. So be it. Then I'll just say: _______, not the girl with whom you can play your games "

“Hyung, it's none of your business! I by myself can figure it out somehow without your advice! You know nothing!" Taehyung turned around and went to his room.

"I hope you will remember your words well after you screw it up!" shouted to him in the trail of Yoongi.

Taehyung just waved it off and headed into the house. He practically ran into his room and slammed the door angrily. He was angry at Yoongi's words, but even more angry that he was completely right. And today it has become only proof that he can become the one who will ruin everything. He fell onto the bed, trying to hide his hurt and embarrassment in the sheets. His head did not leave the thought of how to fix everything now ...

POV Jungkook

He stood in the middle of the lawn watching the hyungs quarrel. What's going on here? It ended as abruptly as it began. Taehyung turned and went one way, and Yoongi the other. He once again looked at the place where your car was parked 5 minutes ago and, turning on his heels, went back into the house. Entering the room, he fell on the bed. He covered his eyes with his hand, remembering your warm body that pressed against his body. He smiled as his body filled with warmth. The notification sound distracted him. He took his phone out of his pocket and looked at the screen. But there were no notifications. Hmm, weird, he definitely heard the sound of the message. He sat up on the bed looking at his phone. It seems that he had already started hallucinations before lying on the floor some object caught his attention. He got out of bed and came closer. Ah so that's where the sound came from. He smiled as he lifted your phone off the floor.

"You are so careless ..." he said softly, as if you could hear him.

But he was even more surprised when the phone unlocked from his fingerprint. You probably didn't even remember how at one of party he added his fingerprint into your phone. What luck, he thought. He saw the booking confirmation. Address and door code. He laughed, it seems that luck turned to face him. Finally, you had the opportunity to be alone, without the rest of the members, staff and cameras. He quickly changed his clothes and left the room. He quickly went up to the house and headed to Taehyung's room. Without even knocking, he went inside

"Hyung, get up," he said in a joyful voice.

“Nobody didn't teach you how to knock. I don't want to eat or drink, fuck off. " said Taehyung wrapping himself even more in the blankets.

"Get up!" he said pulling off the blankets with Taehyung

“Hey kid, don't you understand what I'm saying? Fuck off "

“Oh, shut your mouth. Get up. I know where is ____! Come on!" he said and smiled

Whatever Taehyung was about to say, he froze. He quickly jumped out of bed and began to change.

"How do you know where she is?" asked Taehyung while dressing

“She dropped her phone in my room before you showed up,” Jungkook replied

"What if she doesn't open the door for us?"

“It doesn't matter, I have the code for her door,” he laughed as Taehyung stared at him in disbelief. “They sent an email with an address and code,” he explained.

“You caught me off guard twice today. The first time I found ______ in your room. The second one just now. You know, I always hated that you knew the most about her. "

“It's not my fault that you don't know how to drink. They start to share their secrets after a few bottles of alcohol, and you are all asleep by this time, ”he smiled and shrugged.

"Come on, I'm ready." Taehyung patted him on the shoulder and headed for the exit.

They quickly got into the car and drove away. He was very glad that they did not meet anyone, and he did not have to explain where they were leaving. He quickly wrote to Namjoon that they drove to the store. In half an hour they were there. It was a small house with a beautiful garden. He looked around and did not see your car, did they really come before you. He parked the car on the other side of the house so that you would not see it. They went into the house looking around. The house had large windows down to the floor. In the back of the living room there was a sofa, which was hidden in the shade, and it was not visible from the street, but it overlooked the garden.

"It's so calm," Taehyung said as he sat down in a chair. He turned his gaze to Taehyung, who smiled for perhaps the first time that day.

“You can't think of a better place,” he smiled broadly as he sat down on the sofa. It only remained to wait for you. Now he was bursting with anticipation, like a child waiting for a gift.

POV You

You was sitting in the restaurant when the booking confirmation came. You didn't want to go home, so you rented a house near the filming location. Judging by the photos, a calm environment is what you needed. Your body ached with excitement, which has not left you since the moment you left home. Maybe get to know someone, you looked around the room when this thought arose in your head. "As if someone could compare with them." you muttered to yourself. You got up and went to the hostess to pay the bill.

You went out and the warm evening air enveloped you. You couldn't stop the smile on your face when you remembered Jungkook's hot body with your back pressed against it. I need to get drunk! You thought to yourself when you got into the car. On the way to the house, you stopped by the store and bought fruit and wine. You were driving home and a smile lit up your face. You already imagined how you will lie in a cool pool drinking wine. In half an hour you were there. You went inside and turning on the light at the entrance, your heart melted when the whole garden lit up with beautiful lights. You walked between the trees feeling like a fairy tale. You have reached a dark house with huge windows. You went into the house and went to the living room. Thanks to the light from the garden, the house was not dark. You walked into the living room and turned on the light. With your peripheral vision, you saw two dark figures. Fear enveloped your body. You screamed and covered your face with your hands, causing the bags to fall to the floor with a clatter of breaking glass.

"At least this time she didn’t shout at me when she saw, can this be considered progress?" Jungkook's voice broke the silence.

“Last time she was wearing only underwear, and now a tracksuit. This can hardly be considered progress. ”Taehyung's voice replied

You slowly turned towards the dark figures, and your eyes refused to believe that Jungkook and Taehyung were sitting in front of you. Why are they here?

"Yyyyaaa idiots!" you shouted at them. You took a deep breath trying to calm yourself. "How did you found about this place?" you were completely shocked to see them. Jungkook smiled broadly and took out his phone from his pocket, your phone to be precise.

"You trust me," Jungkook laughed. A moment with the party immediately appeared in my head when you said that you have no secrets from him and he can even add his fingerprint to your phone. How could you forget about it and not delete it. You put your head down, unable to look at them. A red wine stain surrounded your bare feet. Right, wine ... you completely forgot about it.

“It seems like someone wanted to have a nice evening with wine and fruit,” Taehyung smiled as he stood up from his chair. “But don't you need a man for such an evening, or better two men,” he said when you looked at him. Your face flushed with embarrassment. And what was you just thinking. Before you could open your mouth to reply, he crossed the room and kissed you. This kiss has completely intoxicated you. His tender hot lips caressed yours. A fire broke out inside you, which you tried to extinguish all this time. “I didn't want to be interrupted by someone's call this time,” he said, pulling away from you. He sank down to the bags that lay at your feet. You stood motionless while your brain tried to figure out what just happened. Strong arms wrapped around your body, lifting up.

“It will be bad if you cut yourself,” Jungkook said as you turned towards him. "Didn't I deserve a kiss for saving you?" he asked, and without waiting for an answer he kissed you. Oh these guys are definitely going to drive you crazy.

“We were lucky, the second whole bottle of wine,” said Taehyung, picking up a bag of fruit and a whole bottle of wine from the floor.

“I definitely need a drink! It’s difficult to accept soberly everything that happens now” you said, breaking free from Jungkook's embrace. You went to Taehyung and took the wine and went to the side of the kitchen to open it. Having reached the kitchen, you quickly opened the bottle, and pouring it into the glass, took a long sip.

"Have you been told that you think too much?" Jungkook asked when he entered the kitchen.

“Stop being afraid of your desires. Especially when they coincide with ours, ”Taehyung said while hugging you from back.

"You don't understand," you tried to free yourself from Taehyung's hands, but he only tightened his grip.

“What? The fact that you work for the one company? Who am I and Jungkook? Or the fact that there are three of us in this room now and we are excited? " snarled into your ear Taehyung.

"What exactly are you afraid of, ______?" asked Jungkook, stepping closer.

"All of this " you whispered

“Then answer a few questions, our baby. You can even not out loud, but for yourself. Do you like Jungkook? Do you like me? Do you want us? Have you dreamed about it? " Taehyung asked questions slowly as his fingers played with your hair. Even though you didn't say a word, the answer to all the questions was YES. Jungkook came up to you and ran his fingers over your chin, lifting your face to his before kissing. The tenderness of his kiss, and Taehyung's hands completely melted you.

"Only today. Let's not be who we are just today. ”Jungkook whispered into your lips

They were right why things have to be so difficult. You didn't want to think about tomorrow. Why can't you afford to enjoy tonight. You raised your hands and took Jungkook's face and kissed him. You didn’t hold yourself back this time. All the desire and lust that they aroused in you, you reflected in this kisses. You felt Taehyung's fingers tighten on your skin as Jungkook groaned in pleasure. You pulled away from Jungkook and turned to Taehyung. You hugged him while your fingers tangled in his hair. This kiss was insane. Pleasure gripped your body as Taehyung's hands fully pressed you into his body. Jungkook pressed against your back and pulled your hair back, leaving kisses on your neck and shoulders. Your head was spinning with pleasure.

"I'm certainly not an expert, but I hope there is at least some bed somewhere in this house" Jungkook said, and Taehyung had to pull away from you out because of laughter. Taehyung shoved Jungkook in the shoulder, causing him to move away from you. "What? I don't think this table is as comfortable as a bed. ”Jungkook shrugged.

All three laughed at this. You knew for sure that there was a bed, and it was huge. “I think I saw something in the description of the house about the bed,” you said, heading towards the back room. You walked fast enough listening to heavy steps behind you. You unbuttoned your jacket before sending it to the floor. You opened the door and heard a growl when the guys saw a huge bed in the middle of the room.

“I think this is what we need,” said Taehyung.

You went to the bed and ran your hand over the sheet. What seemed like an unreal dream before, now it was a reality. You felt Jungkook's hot fingers intertwine with your cold fingers. Before you turned towards Jungkook, Taehyung turned your face towards him and kissed you. This kiss was not like the previous ones, it echoed with heat between your legs. While Taehyung was kissing you, Jungkook's swift fingers got rid of all the clothes on yours. Jungkook pulled your hand sharply and you fell into his arms. Before you could understand, you were already lying on the bed under him.

"Isn't she beautiful, hyung?" he said kneeling down and examining your body.

"She's perfect!" said Taehyung, sitting down next to you on the bed.

Jungkook ran his hand over your belly, lifting upward. It sank to your face, squeezing your neck. His gaze was wild, full of desire. But despite this, when he kissed you, you were struck by the tenderness that he gave you. You always liked Jungkook's rudeness, which changed dramatically with tenderness. It made you melt. Despite all the tenderness, a minute later the tenderness changed into an all-consuming passion that swept away everything in its path. You groaned as his fingers pressed into your skin, leaving red marks. Jungkook went down your neck before you felt the teeth clenching your nipple. A flash of pain mingled with pleasure, causing a loud groan. You heard a soft laugh next to you. You opened your eyes, meeting Taehyung's gaze.

"This kid is so impatient," smiled at Taehyung as he ran his fingers through Jungkook's hair, and a shiver went through your body. He ran his fingers over your cheek, brushing away strands of hair. "Although I think that's what we need now." Taehyung moved on the bed, sitting behind your back. While Jungkook's tongue caressed your breast, Taehyung left kisses on your neck and shoulders. These two made you go crazy. Your moans filled the room. Jungkook descended down your body, leaving kisses and red teeth marks. The sound of tearing fabric filled the silence as Jungkook ripped your panties off.

“I've dreamed of getting them for so long,” Jungkook said, stuffing them into his pocket. “So wet,” Jungkook said, running his fingers over your crotch. Taehyung reached out and took Jungkook's hand and pulled him towards him. He licked his fingers, it was the most erotic sight you have ever seen. "It seems like it made her leak more, huyng," Jungkook said, looking at Taehyung. You groaned loudly as he pushed two fingers into you.

"I wonder what will happen to her if I kiss you," Taehyung said, running his fingers over the maknae's cheek. Oh god, only from his words you could cum right now. Taehyung's fingers dug into your hair, tightening his grip, forcing you to meet his gaze. "Didn't you dream about it when you caressed yourself at night?"

You could only moan because Jungkook covered your pussy with his mouth. Your back arches with pleasure. Jungkook caressed your clit with his lips and tongue, forcing it to wriggle.

“Taehyung…” you moaned his name as he dug his teeth into your skin.

“I love the way you moan my name, baby,” Taehyung whispered in your ear.

These two guys were driving you crazy. While Jungkook fondled your pussy, Taehyung played with your nipples. Your body trembled violently as Jungkook stuck his tongue into you, which alternated with his fingers. The orgasm was approaching with incredible speed. They have completely taken over your body. Jungkook's tongue kept circling your clitoris as his fingers fucked you.

"Cum for us baby," Taehyung growled. Jungkook's mouth covered your clitoris and began to suck vigorously while his fingers quickened the pace. An orgasm enveloped you, making you moan loudly. Your body shook with every touch of Jungkook's lips.

"You are incredible, _______!" said Jungkook meeting your eyes

Taehyung took Jungkook's chin and pulled his face towards him. Leaning forward, Taehyung ran his tongue over Jungkook's wet lips, which sent goosebumps to your skin. "You are so delicious," Taehyung said, looking at you. They got out of bed, began to take off their clothes. Although it looked more like they decided to tease you. You sat down in the middle of the bed, watching this erotic performance. Your body did not leave. shivering as you watched them, their naked bodies creating heat in your body, making you languish with desire.

Taehyung walked over to the bed and took you by the hand, pulled you into his arms, forcing you to kneel. He kissed you, but before you could fully enjoy him, a tight grip appeared in your hair, breaking the kiss. Jungkook covered your mouth eagerly caressing him. You heard Taehyung growl and couldn't help but smile at it. Jungkook broke the kiss and only then did you see Taehyung's fingers in his hair. You laughed softly, which is why they sharply looked at you forcing you to freeze.

“She seems to be having too much fun,” Jungkook said.

“This definitely needs to be changed,” said Taehyung pushed Jungkook onto the bed.

Jungkook lay on his back in front of you, your gaze wandering over him wanting to get every inch of this gorgeous body. Taehyung knelt down behind you, pressing against your back. You could feel Taehyung's hard cock sliding down your wet crotch, making you moan. Taehyung left a kiss on your shoulder. He ran his fingers over your hand and took your hand around Jungkook's cock. Taehyung ran your hand the length of Jungkook's cock and he groaned loudly. "That's it, baby." whispered Taehyung in your ear. You looked at Jungkook, who closed his eyes enjoying while your and Taehyung fingers caressed his cock. You leaned forward and ran your tongue over Jungkook's nipple. Taehyung ran his fingers over your back before slipping his fingers into your pussy, making you moan. You kept kissing Jungkook's body as you get down. You ran your tongue over the head of Jungkook's cock.

"Oh shit ______" Jungkook groaned as you took his cock in your mouth.

Taehyung moved his hand to your ass, squeezing it tightly as his fingers fucked you. You moaned, but your moan was drowned out by Jungkook's cock. Taehyung's fingers twisted into your hair, forcing you to take Jungkook's cock all the way into your mouth. You started to choke when Taehyung pushed into you. Your body was pierced by a current from fullness. You continued to suck Jungkook's cock, making him moan loudly. Your mouth was repeating the movements of Taehyung, who was making hard, slow thrusts inside you.

“You will be my doom,” Taehyung growled as you swung your hips in response to his thrust.

“Not only yours. She decided to completely drive me crazy. "Jungkook groaned.

You continued to suck Jungkook's cock while Taehyung fucked you. Your whole body was seized with heat, the pleasure was unreal. You gripped Jungkook's thigh with your fingers as the orgasm approached. Taehyung stopped making you whimper.

"Baby, if you want to cum, you must first make our Jungkook cum," Taehyung said as he leaned forward and kissed you on the shoulder. "We can't leave him without dessert, can we?"

You ran your tongue over Jungkook's cock before meeting his playful gaze. Oh my God, he drove you crazy with just one look at him. You again took Jungkook's cock into your mouth, swallowing it completely until it rested against the wall of your throat, from behind your forehead, he moaned loudly, intertwining his fingers with your strands, making hard thrusts into your mouth. Your body trembled as Taehyung began to move within you again. Taehyung squeezed your thighs tightly as he continued to fuck you. Your moans vibrated on Jungkook's cock. Jungkook's entire body was shackled, his fingers hurting. He moaned your name loudly as he furiously fucked your mouth. Tears streaming down your cheeks, Jungkook gave a few hard thrusts before you felt the hot liquid fill yours. That how Jungkook cum was one of the most passionate moments of your life. His back arched and loud moans filled the room as you continued to run your lips over his sensitive head, forcing him to keep him happy every time. You were so consumed by Jungkook that you didn't even notice right away that Taehyung had stopped moving and just ran his fingers over your back.

“I practically started to get jealous,” Taehyung said, making a hard jerk, knocking out a moan from you. “Baby, you just flow from Jungkook's animal passion. Your skin has goose bumps. Although I admit, I think your mouth works wonders, this is the first time I see him come that much. " Taehyung's words made your skin goosebumps. “I think it's time for me to stop holding back my wild desires, you are more than able to withstand it”

After that, Taehyung slapped your ass, leaving a burning mark of his palm. His movements were unbridled, your whole body trembled with pleasure. You couldn't even imagine how rude Taehyung can be in sex. For a second, your body was enveloped in fear of how dangerous it is, but all thoughts flew out of your head when orgasm fettered everything inside you. You dug your teeth into Jungkook's skin, trying to cope with the wave of pleasure that engulfed you. You no longer controlled your body which was shaking violently as Taehyung continued to fuck you, reaching his own orgasm. Your body went completely limp as Taehyung's grip on your hips loosened. You were like melted ice cream forgotten in the sun, unable to move your body.

You felt strong hands on your shoulders, which moved you, lying on your back. Your mind was somewhere far from realizing what was happening around. Hot lips touched you. A gentle kiss smoothly changed color to passionate, making your body flutter. You heard a quiet laugh next to you, after which the hot lips changed to cooler ones and the liquid merged into your mouth. You felt the bright taste of wine, which made you finally come to your senses and open your eyes.

Taehyung took another sip of wine before smiling at you. You felt at the heaviness over your body, Jungkook was lying on you leaving kisses on your neck. "I'll hope, you don't think we ended up playing with you so quickly," Jungkook whispered into your ear. The heat went through your body, echoing the pain of renewed excitement between your legs. How can you get aroused so quickly after such a strong orgasm. Thoughts filled your head when you couldn’t move your hands or feet. And now it was not that you didn’t feel your body, that it was to restrict your movements. You raised your head and your body froze when you saw that your wrists were tied with a red silk ribbon.

“Apparently the owner of this house is also very fond of playing forbidden games,” said Taehyung, laughing softly. “Now I understand why he has such a big bed.” Taehyung sent you a dangerous smile and a shiver went through your body.

“I’ll have to write a good review,” Jungkook laughed. “Are you afraid of us now?” Jungkook asked, your heart pounding as you met Jungkook's dark and lustful gaze.

“No” your voice trembled greatly. But your obvious fear amused them a lot.

"Believe me, baby, whatever we want to do with you, you'll love it," Taehyung said as he got out of bed. You watched his every move as Jungkook continued to tease you with his mouth. Taehyung went to the nightstand and lit the candle on top of him in the hands of the candle he returned to the bed.

A quiet laugh Jungkook drew your attention from the candle that was above your body. “I love seeing you so vulnerable, you have no idea how much I want to fuck you now,” said Jungkook in a low voice.

Taehyung's hand trembled and a drop of hot wax fell on your body before pain gripped your body. Jungkook sank down and took your nipple in his mouth, forcing it out towards pleasure. Jungkook pulled back and Taehyung again tilted his hand like wax on you. Pain mixed with pleasure. Your whole body turned out to be developing into pieces. Never have you experienced such strong feelings that made you want everything to stop and continue at the same time. You tried to break out of the tapes that bound you, but it seemed only thanks to them you could feel freedom. You couldn't control the tears that ran down your face.

"Are you in pain?" Taehyung asked, but neither in his gaze nor in his voice did you hear the emotion. After all, he knew for sure that you liked everything that was happening now.

“No, it's just that… sensations too strong…” Another drop of wax fell on your body, interrupting your speech with a groan. This time Jungkook didn’t caress your nipples, forcing you to cope with the pain by yourself. It was more than just pain, though. You were amazed how much pain can cause intense pleasure making you want more. Jungkook groaned as he watched your body wriggle under the drops of hot wax, he leaned forward and kissed you, making you tremble with desire, you rubbed against him wanting to get more but he stopped your movements and grabbed both of your thighs with your hands.

“I don’t think I can hold back any longer,” Jungkook said, looking at Taehyung.

Taehyung smiled and ran his fingers through Jungkook's hair before getting out of bed and setting the candle down. Jungkook has moved at your feet. He put your boat on his shoulder, slowly untie the ribbon from your leg, and then left a light bite on your skin. You moaned, you wanted more, but Jungkook just smiled at all your attempts as he untied your other leg. Taehyung's hands grabbed your shoulders and moved to the edge of the bed until your head was practically hanging off it.

Jungkook spread your thighs wide with his hands against them as his cock slid along your folds. You tried to define with your thighs, but Jungkook shifted his body weight, pressing you against the bed.

Jungkook looked at Taehyung, who was watching you while standing next to the bed. “She flows so much,” he said and sent a smile to Taehyung that made you feel tingling all over your body. Before you could look at Taehyung, Jungkook abruptly entered you full length. With a loud groan, he stopped, closing his eyes, he took a deep breath. Gasping for breath, you was unable to utter a sound. You tried to move, but your hands were still tied, forcing you to accept the sensations that covered you. Taehyung ran his fingers over your cheek forcing you to look at him.

“Breathe, baby,” Taehyung smiled before looking at Jungkook. “Have you cum already?” with amusement he asked Jungkook, who could not move.

"Shut your moron" Jungkook growled, he opened his eyes and his eyes were wild. "Let's see how long you have enough while you fuck her lovely mouth."

"Sounds like you think you can last longer than me." Taehyung raised an eyebrow

Oh my God, it seems tomorrow you can hardly walk and possibly talk, you thought to yourself. Taehyung moved with his hand on the bed. Taking his dick in his hand, he ran his head over your lips. You opened your mouth and licked it. You took the head of his penis with your lips and you gave shallow movements playing with your tongue. He moaned as you began to do deeper shaking your head with each movement. You heard Jungkook laugh as he started making very slow, shallow thrusts. You wanted more, but you couldn't move. You realized that Jungkook will follow your mouth movements on Taehyung's cock. You nodded your head forward wholly swallowing Taehyung's cock, and Jungkook gave a full length thrust into your pussy, you moaned. "Fuck ...." Taehyung growled and you heard Jungkook's soft laugh

Taehyung moved your head lower. It entered your throat abruptly, so deep that it was difficult for you to breathe. You were glad to see him impatient because Jungkook started doing hard, deep thrusts. You couldn't stop moaning while Jungkook fucked you hard, but your moans were almost inaudible due to Taehyung's cock fucking your throat. Your body was on fire, sensations tear you apart. You wanted to run or hide, but they took away every opportunity for you to escape from this wild love. All you have left is to dying from an overabundance of fun. Orgasm came so fast that your head was spinning. You didn't see anything. Your gaze was completely blurred. Taehyung and Jungkook's loud moans deafened you, making you lose your sense of reality. Orgasm gripped you, you moaned loudly while Taehyung and Jungkook fucked you at the same time. It was too strong a sensation for you. Your body arched trembling violently.

“Ah… fuck… god damn it… she squeezes me so hard…. Damn " you heard how Jungkook growl. He moved your legs forward until your knees hit the mattress. His movements were wild, something exploded inside you as he continued to hammer hard into you. With each thrust, your orgasm returned to you with renewed vigor.

“I'm going to cum,” Taehyung moaned loudly, thrusting deeply into your mouth.

They cum almost at the same time forcing you to gasp and whimper. The feeling of free flight ended with a hard impact on the ground, which shattered your body into small fragments. Never in your life have you experienced such intense pleasure that completely destroyed you. You could feel your body covered in hot cum as their hands moved forcefully over their cocks. You felt like Jungkook pushed into you again, trying to prolong his pleasure, which made you tremble even more. You heard Taehyung moving across the bed and after a loud shout from Jungkook that turned into a moan, but you didn't have the strength to open your eyes. Feeling is the only thing left for you. After several deep thrusts, Jungkook came out of you, falling onto the bed next to your body. Finally your legs were free, but before you could relax, Taehyung grabbed them by moving them on one shoulder. Taehyung pushed into you and it felt incredible. Due to the fact that your legs were squeezed, he pushed hard into your tight pussy. You squeezed the ribbon that bound your hands with your fingers, trying to cope with this pleasure. You were completely lost, even the feeling was now blurry for you. Your body is completely limp beneath Taehyung moving slowly inside you. You felt a flash of pain on your shoulder, you moaned barely audibly, that's all that you had enough strength for. All you had to do was accept everything they did with you.

You don't even know at which moment they untied you, after a while you felt a wet towel that was wiping your body. After a while you came to your senses from the heat that surrounded you. Your whole body ached and was unable to even move a finger on your hand. You even thought you were tied up again. With all your strength, you were able to open your eyes. You were half on top of Jungkook, who was asleep. You felt the weight of you that pressed you, slightly turning your head, you saw a reflection. Taehyung and Jungkook hugged your body while changing their arms and legs with each other. You looked at Jungkook again and a red mark on his shoulder caught your attention. It was a bite mark, now it's clear why Jungkook shouted, you smiled at the thought. You didn't even have to look, you knew exactly what was on your shoulder now if the same mark.

You felt Taehyung kiss your shoulder. "Are you okay?" he asked barely audibly. You smiled wider and shook your head, and you didn't have the strength to talk. Jungkook opened his eyes to meet yours. A smile of pleasure spread across his face.

“You should go to the gym to increase your stamina,” Jungkook purred, squeezing you tighter, your eyes widening at his words. “Today we showed only half the strength of what we want to do with you,” he ran his fingers over your cheek

You moaned at his words "What do you mean?" you whispered barely audibly

Taehyung ran his hand over your ass before stopping on the tight ring, pressing lightly on it. “We're not that patient. Today is the first and last time we could wait in line to be inside you " he continued to fondle you, causing sensations that you did not know about. You felt how Jungkook's cock became hard again, pressing against your thigh. You opened your mouth, unable to say no more a word.

“Don't be afraid, baby. This is my usual condition when you are around. I'm not going to do anything now. You need to get some sleep." He left a kiss on your lips while Taehyung continued kissing your neck. "Although I can't promise anything about him. "Jungkook smiled as he watched Taehyung's actions.

"I think I got too carried away," Taehyung said with a smile, removing his hand from your ass. "He's right, you have to gain strength baby."

Hell, they decided to fuck you to death, although you obviously didn't mind that idea, you thought. You fell into a deep sleep again, surrounded by two gorgeous guys who hugging you.

___________________

LIST

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[trashforhockeyguys]

Don’t Hold Me -13- Carter Hart

A/N: After a little break I’m back!! All previous parts are linked in my master list, as always! This is also super super fluffy. So enjoy that!!

You held tightly to Carter as you walked into the restaurant. You tried not to think too much about it, even if this wasn’t something you really wanted to do, you knew it had to be done. Ethan was only in town for a few days, and he needed to meet Carter. Carter was your….boyfriend. Which seemed strange to even think about. It all kind of snuck up on you, but here you were. 

“Just don’t feel bad if he harasses you about your stats,” You tried to tell him, “He kind of does that to everyone. Comes from years of playing, and growing up with guys that are in the league now.”

“Y/N, it’s fine. I can handle TK when he goes into protective bother mode, I think I can handle your actual brother.”

Your hands started sweating a little bit. You’d never been this nervous for your brother to meet anyone before, but that’s because you hadn’t felt this way about anyone else in a very very long time. It felt strange, the warmth spreading through your chest and the butterflies in your stomach. But these butterflies weren’t a warning, they were a way of telling you that this was a really good decision. Carter was a good thing, not someone to be afraid of. 

“You didn’t have to offer to take us to a place this nice either,” you said, trying to smooth down your dress again, “He would’ve been fine with fast food or something.”

Carter nudged you with his shoulder and smiled, “Hey, I wanna show your brother that I can treat you right. Besides, it’s about time I treated you to a nice dinner.”

“But the dress, and the reservations, and all of the-”

“Y/N, I get you aren’t used to this,” he said softly, “But this is what it means to be with someone who cares. You’ve eyed that dress every time we’ve passed that boutique. Just let me take care of you? Please, just this once?”

He wasn’t wrong. You’d been dreaming of getting the dress. It wasn’t anything over the top, simple and classic. The silk wasn’t like anything you currently owned, it felt so unlike you, yet like it was made for you at the same time. So to say that you’d been more than surprised when you found it on your bed after you got back from classes today with a note from Carter had been an understatement.

“Do you trust me?” He smiled, it’d become like a thing between you two, even if it had a much deeper meaning. 

“You know I do,” You replied softly.

He smiled and held onto you as the waiter led you to your table. Ethan wasn’t here yet, which you expected. You took a deep breath and sat down. You automatically started playing all the possible outcomes in your head. Maybe Ethan would hate Carter, maybe all of this was a big mistake. 

“Do you want some wine?”

Your shoulders sagged, finally letting go of some of the weight that was bearing down on you, “Yeah, wine would be good.”

He laughed and signaled the waiter over before telling him what he wanted. After the waiter was gone, Carter reached over and grabbed your hand, trying to calm you down as much as he could. Your heart seemed to jump as soon as he touched you. You weren’t used to the good feeling that came with being with someone. You only knew the tear, not the pure joy.

Not two minutes later, Ethan came strolling in. You held your breath as he shook Carter’s hand. This felt big...This was going outside of the little bubble you made in Philly. Carter meeting your brother made this all real. There really was no going back now, Carter was officially part of your life. 

“Hey you,” Ethan said, giving you a big hug.

“Hey.”

You held your breath as Carter held his hand out to Ethan. This felt too big. Ethan just smiled and did something that you didn’t expect, he hugged Carter. You went rigid for a moment, expecting something to backfire. You could tell that he said something to Carter, but you couldn’t tell what. But they were both smiling when the three of you sat down. 

“So, stats are looking pretty good so far Carter.”

“Seriously Ethan? We haven’t even gotten any food yet.”

Ethan cracked a big smile and both boys laughed, “I’m just joking. Don’t worry, sis.”

“You’re going to kill me, Ethan.”

“Would you rather me have brought Kora?”

You eyed him, hoping he’d drop that subject for a moment. Under the table, you felt Carter’s hand brush your’s. You smiled softly. Your body seemed to relax as soon as your hand was in his, like he knew you needed something to calm you. This all felt so big.

“I need to thank you,” Ethan said, looking at Carter, “For taking care of her. She doesn’t like to admit it, but she needs people.” 

Carter squeezed your hand. You felt your chest tighten just a little bit, but in a good way. Somehow a lot of your stress melted away in the last few days. You knew he was still out there, waiting, but you didn’t feel like you were being watched anymore. You felt a little safer, somehow. You were still scared to go anywhere alone, you knew he didn’t go anywhere near you as long as someone was with you. 

“How are classes?”

“You always ask that, and I always tell you that it’s fine.” You groaned, taking a sip of your wine, “I’m crushing everything.”

He smiled and tipped his glass to you before taking a long swig of his drink. The three of you settled into a sort of rhythm. The conversation flipped between you and Ethan back home, and hockey, and Carter’s life when he wasn’t tied to the Flyers. You felt comfortable and safe with them together. And they seemed to actually enjoy being there. You liked the idea of your brother and your boyfriend getting along. You weren’t sure what you would’ve done if they didn’t. 

Carter never let go of your hand. You knew he was doing that so you knew you had someone there. He’d squeeze it every now and again, a soft smile would tug on his lips. You were sure Ethan saw the gentle glaces between you and the young goalie, especially since you looked over at your older brother and saw him smiling just as softly. There was an understanding. 

Ethan could see how happy you were, and how safe you felt. He liked the way Carter seemed to be willing to do whatever he had to make sure you were okay. Ethan knew you weren’t one to depend on people, but he often felt horrible that he wasn’t closer Philly. He wanted to be there for you all the time, but stayed thankful for Travis and Nolan who were a phone call away from you. But Carter brought something different to the mix. 

“You seem happy,” Ethan said when Carter excused himself to use the bathroom. 

“I think I am E.”

“He brings out something different in you,” He almost laughed, “Haven’t seen it in a while.”

“You know, Travis said the same thing last week. I told him he was full of shit.”

He had to choke back a laugh. You almost felt normal again. Eating dinner with your boyfriend and your brother, joking about random things. By the end of the night you felt super relaxed and light. You’d forgotten about all the things you were afraid of, and for a moment you didn’t even care. 

You hugged Ethan goodbye and held onto Carter as the two of you walked throught the streets of Philly. You were comfortable with him, you felt like nothing wrong could happen as long as he was by your side. 

You didn’t have a reason to doubt that. He’d never given you a reason to doubt him. In fact, he worked hard to prove that he wouldn’t let you down. You could never thank him enough for everything he’d done already. He opened his apartment to you, and now you spent more time there than you did in your dorm. Mostly because you didn’t like being in your dorm room alone when Kora wasn’t there. But even still, he told you that you could bring Kora over anytime you wanted, even when he was on a road trip. Which turned into a sleepover or two while he was gone. 

“You’re very smiley,” He nudged you as the two of you turned the corner.

“I’m just happy,” You replied, tucking yourself into his side.

“Oh yeah?”

“Mmhm, my brother likes you,” You pointed out, “And you don’t hate him. So yeah, I’m happy.”

He let out a little laugh and kissed the top of your head. You hoped this feeling never went away. You didn’t understand what people were talking about when they said being in lobe felt like you were flying, but you understood now. 

You didn’t want this feeling to ever go away. You liked being in love with Carter. Because...well you were in love with him. You weren’t sure if you’d ever know what this felt like, but now that you knew you never wanted it to go away.

“You know, I-”

You stopped dead in your tracks. You could feel the blood drain from your face. He was there, not more than a couple of hundred yards in front of you. You tugged Carter’s arm back, so he’d turn back around. It only took him one little glance at your face to tell that something was wrong. 

“Y/N?”

“You need to get me out of here,” your throat felt like it was going to close up, “Please.” 

“Hey, what’s wrong? Y/N?”

“He’s here.”

Next thing you knew Carter was opening the car door for you. You weren’t even sure how you got back to the car. Your whole body was shaking. The free feeling you were enjoying all night was gone. You could lie to yourself all you wanted, but as long as he was in the city, you wouldn’t be safe. He knew where to find you, and he’d keep coming back time and time again.

Your mind was racing, trying to come up with some type of plan. You couldn’t keep living in fear like this, it wasn’t healthy. You were meant to be living large, that’s what the college years were for. But instead you felt trapped. You couldn’t go home, and there wasn’t a place in this city that felt safe to you, not when he knew were everything was.

Carter’s hand was on your leg, reminding you that you were safe. You knew he wouldn’t let anyone hurt you. But that didn’t mean that you weren’t afraid for him. Being involved with you wasn’t easy anymore. Anything could happen to Carter and it could all be your fault.

“C’mon, let’s get you inside,” His voice was soft and gentle. 

Everything with Carter just seemed warm and cozy, like a fire on a cold winter day. You were selfish in the way that you didn’t want to let that go. You never wanted to stop being able to experience it.

“How about a nice bath? I got those bath salt things you mentioned the other week. And those essential oils too. Would that help?”

You looked at him in a dazy kind of shocked way. You mentioned those things in passing just once. You told him they might help him wind down after a tough game or something, and that they always helped you. You were in awe of the man next to you. He had enough to think about with his own career, yet he was surprising you at every turn. Every chance he got, he was doing something to take care of you. Something that was completely unnecessary, yet he seemed to take pride in that.

When the two of you got into his apartment, he led you to the large master bath, which happened to have the very deep bathtub that you had the tendency to spend hours soaking in while he was on a road trip. 

Carter had you sit on the closed toilet while he started to run the water for the bath. You watched as he set up a diffuser for the oils you liked, which you didn’t even know that he knew you to do. You realized as you sat there, that you’d never not feel completely at ease with Carter. 

There was just something about him that made life easy for you. Despite everything that was happening, he made it easy. 

Once the tub was filled, and everything ready for you, Carter turned and gave you a small smile. You wanted to ask what you’d done to deserve him. You couldn’t understand how life decided to bring you two together in such a way as this. But you were more than grateful. 

“I’ll just be on the other side of the door if you need me, okay?”

You nodded, wishing there was some way you could ask him to stay. Only because you didn’t want to be alone. You wanted to spend as much time with him as you possibly could. Even though you were more than comfortable with him, you always seemed to have a ticking clock going in the back of your head, just waiting until school was over and the season ended. Who knows what would happen to the two of you once summer hit. You weren’t even sure where you were going, and how you’d manage to keep up with Carter.

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

“Can you stay?” You said it before you could stop yourself, “Sorry….I didn’t mean to say that….I just didn’t want to be alone.”

He stood in the doorway for a second before glancing around the bathroom. His eyes seemed to land on a spot because a small smile tugged on the corner of his lips before he kicked off his shoes and tugged off his dress jacket and tie. He grabbed a spare fluffy towel and put it on the ground next to the end of the tub, where your head would be, and then sat down. From that spot, you knew his back would be to you. 

“I’ll stay right here. Unless you don’t want me to.”

“No...staying is good.”

He settled onto his spot on the floor and pulled out his phone, “Do you want music?”

You nodded and waited until he looked away to start taking your dress off. You slid into the warm water around the same time that soft gentle music started playing from Carter’s phone. You settled into the warm water, willing it to somehow melt everything away.

Despite the fact that you were naked, with Carter just inches away from you, there wasn’t a bit of sexual tension. It was almost like this was normal. You couldn’t understand how he managed to make you feel so at ease all of the time. No matter the situation, he was the calm in the storm. 

“Thank you.”

Out of the corner of your eye, you saw his hand reach back towards you. You reached over to grab it. The simple touch brought a strange sense of comfort to you. You weren’t sure how you’d allowed yourself to become so attached to him. You swore you wouldn't do this again, yet here you were. You always longed to be with him. No amount of time seemed to be long enough.

The warm water relaxed your muscles, you felt safe. Like nothing could get you inside these walls. You were safe and happy with him. Those two feelings seemed to be a constant. Which was something you were far from used to. You didn’t know what it was like...until now. You wished you could just bottle this moment and keep it forever. Keep the peace, and the happiness. 

It wasn’t about falling anymore. Not when you already fell. You couldn’t stop something that already happened. The truth was, you were in love with him. You loved Carter more than you could understand. It snuck up on you, and didn’t give you a chance to defend yourself. But this...this was welcomed. Because somehow, you knew he was worthy of your love.

Because, the truth was... you loved Carter.

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