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diordeer · 2 months

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౨ৎ SOMEONE LIKE YOU

“i've been searchin' a long time for someone exactly like you, i’ve been travelin' all around the world waitin' for you to come through” - van morrison (smau)

contains: charlie bushnell x fem!reader, where they play in a movie adaptation of ‘better than the movies’ also pls ignore how i spelt ‘preparation’ wrong

description: i cant lie, before i saw this request i hadnt read the book but my friend had and she loved it so i was like ok lets impulse buy it… let me tell u i finished it so quick im OBSESSED

requested by: @taysbeauty

Liked by iamcharliebushnell, momonatamada and others

yn.ln in the winter in the icy outdoor pool when u jumped in first i went in too!!

tagged iamcharliebushnell

user1 THE DREAM CASTING OMG

user2 “I WANTED WES” 😖😖😖

↳ user3 she gets it

user4 only one more week until this god sent movie comes out 🫡

↳ user5 i think it should be a law to watch every romcom mentioned before watching this in the cinema

↳ yn.ln how can i make this an actual law

iamcharliebushnell im with u even if it makes me blue 🥶🥶

user7 we all know the soundtrack for this movie is gonna HIT

↳ user8 imagine if taylor swift released new years day (taylors version) for it!

↳ user9 i honestly doubt it but i WISH

momonatamada ahhh i cant wait!!

user6 me patiently waiting for the scene when wes reads over livs shoulder ☺️

↳ user11 the tension 😫

user10 i will now never watch a romcom if it doesnt have charlie and yn as the love interests

yn.ln just posted on their story

Seen by dior.n.goodjohn, sabrinacarpenter and others

Liked by yn.ln, walker.scobell and others

iamcharliebushnell how you swoon me like no other!

tagged yn.ln

View all comments.

user1 can we talk ab how charlie probs took that photo of yn 🩷

user2 IS THAT MR FITZ PERVERT

↳ yn.ln no its michael

user3 them captioning their posts with lyrics from liz and wes’ playlist is KILLING ME

user4 guys i just saw the film wtf it was everything i imagined and MORE

↳ user5 any scene with yn and charlie made me physically kick my legs and giggle in the cinema

yn.ln ooomg do iiii 🤭🤭

↳ iamcharliebushnell i wouldnt say swoon

↳ yn.ln yet u did 🤨

user6 can we talk about their on AND off chemistry pls

↳ user7 THEY ARE LITERALLY IRL WES AND LIZ

dior.n.goodjohn charlie in a romcom?!

↳ iamcharliebushnell u got something against that? 😧🤨

↳ dior.n.goodjohn never!!

user8 dream man playing a dream man

walker.scobell finally he plays a good guy 🙄

↳ iamcharliebushnell i betrayed everyone ONE TIME, get over it

user9 the way better than the movies has almost every trope in the books is insane

Liked by iamcharliebushnell, kiernanshipka and others

yn.ln hold on to the memories, they will hold onto you!!!!!!

tagged iamcharliebushnell

View all comments.

iamcharliebushnell did u actually just mug me off in the first pic while u look gorgeous in the last one?! absolute bias

↳ yn.ln u look great wdym 😃 plus! i think i got a pretty good photo of u in my last post

↳ iamcharliebushnell mhmm

user1 casually flicking past may jailer?!

↳ yn.ln im posing so cool in the photo, the second charlie took the photo i SCRAMBLED to the till to buy it

↳ iamcharliebushnell can confirm!!

user2 omg their latest interview together i cant 😣🩷

↳ user3 the way charlie looks at yn!!!!!!!

↳ user5 the things i would do for a relationship like theirs

↳ user4 lets be real if anyone played a relationship like liz and wes’ in a movie… you would 100% fall in love

↳ user6 guys they havent even said anything about being together!! and even if they are let them be

↳ user5 OH MY GOD its not that big of a deal get over it user6

kiernanshipka just saw the film, you were incredible!!

↳ yn.ln OH MY GOD I LOVE YOU

taglist: @lostinhisworld @lizziesfirstwife @auttumnsayshi @silkenthusiasts @taygrls @kidkrowk @kanojous @niktwazny303 @m00ng4z3r @highfidelities

#charlie bushnell x reader #luke castellan x reader #percy jackon and the olympians #smau #social media au #aesthetic #charlie bushnell #in the know #x reader #better than the movies #wes bennett

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fangirleaconmigo · 3 months

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Hey folks and friends! Guess who is kinda sort back? ME!

As you probably know from my downstream posts, my sister had a major health crisis and I moved her and her cats in with me and my dogs, and there was a major operation then chemo.

It has been a little over six months and I have been just...I don't know how to even describe my state of mind, especially during the weeks I actively thought she was dying. Just. I was fucked. Let's just say that.

But the good news is, she was declared cancer free last week (EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE) and we are trying to put our lives back together as a family, and I am trying to put my mental health back together.

A big part of my mental health is the act of nerdery. Book analysis. Writing. Creativity. It's a hugely important outlet for me.

So if you missed me or my writing at all, just know I missed being here even more.

To anyone who commented on my posts about her or sent me messages or asks, thank you so so so much for your kindness. It mattered to see that humanity and goodness still exists on the internet.

I'm gently wading back in.

I hope you are all well. And we will see if people are still interested in my witcher content. I went through the tag, and I don't know many of the creators now, and the folks I follow have seemed to mostly moved on to other fandoms.

So I'll be finding more folks to follow and boost (not to worry, I don't unfollow mutuals for leaving my fandom. We're buds now). But if you have any blogs to recommend lemme know.

See you around my friends! Oh, and I'm gonna start working through my asks and inbox tomorrow.

xoxo

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writingkeepsmewhole · 4 months

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Party Gone Wrong

This is part 5 of The Bet my old Draco Malfoy Fic that I'm bringing back. This is not following the books or movies it's just me having fun. :) I hope you like it. Let me know what you think and if you wanna be tagged.

Draco Malfoy X Reader

Fic Summery: Draco bets reader she can't make him fall for her.

Part Summery: Reader goes to a party and gets in an interesting situation with Draco.

Warnings: Maybe a word or something not for sure.

Let me know if you want to be tagged in something.

Part 1 Part 4

The next few weeks were not what I would call normal. Well school was normal but other than that my life at Hogwarts was strange.

Everytime I walked through the halls I somehow always bumped into Draco or him bumping into me. Whenever I was in class when I looked up I would find his blue eyes staring at me.

I’m sure to others it looked threatening or like he was glaring at me but I knew the truth.

He was waiting for me to win him over. To do something that would give him a reason to like a mud blood.

I was in the middle of trying to enjoy lunch while catching secret glances with Draco. He was talking to Pansy but he wasn’t looking at her.

I stick my tongue out at him, earning a wink back that makes me giggle.

“Hey Y/N!” one of the twins says sitting next to me, followed by the other one.

“Umm yes?” I say making myself turn and face them.

“You wanna come to another party tonight?”

“Umm sure.”

“Okay great but bring a date.”

“A date?”

“Yeah we are going to be playing games and we want it to be about even for couples.”

“And who am I meant to invite?” I ask.

“The only boys I know are your brother and Harry and one of them is not speaking to me.”

“Oh you can’t invite them, they already have dates.”

“Can I come by myself?”

“No. See you tonight.” They say at the same time and stand up leaving me alone.

“Thanks.” I say after them.

I spent the rest of the day as normal as it could be. I was heading back to my room when I was approached by Neville.

“Umm hi.” He says, stopping me in the hallway.

“Hello.” I say smiling at him.

“Are you going to the party tonight?”

“I was but apparently you can’t go alone.”

“You don’t have a date?” He asks, looking at me from looking at the floor.

“No one I wanted to ask.” I say Draco’s face comes to mind but that was a big no no.

“So umm would you like to go with me?” He asks, blushing.

“Sure.” I say smiling at him.

“Really?”

“Yeah, you're a nice person. I wouldn’t mind spending a night with you.”

“Thanks Y/N.” He says blushing.

“No problem.”

‘I’ll umm meet you in the courtyard after dinner.”

“Sure.” I say smiling at him.

With a read race he quickly scurries off making me laugh. I walk into my room with a new plan in mind.

I was going to get dressed in normal clothes but halfway through I couldn’t help but wonder if Draco would be there. I blush at the thought, hating now I was starting to look forward to seeing him.

Chewing my lip I looked at my clothes laid on the bed and decided to change plans. I wasn’t going to dress up for anyone. But this was a game right? I was meant to make him break down and fall for me.

I have to stop the twisted smile on my face wondering if maybe I should have been in Slytherin.

Giggling, I shrug and start to get dressed.

I didn’t have much time so I settled for ripped jeans, a tight t-shirt that showed off just the right amount of chest and some converse.

I penned my hair up in a clip leaving a bit out to frame my face and put on natural makeup except for my winged liner.

I winked at myself in the mirror, scratched my cat Hallow’s head and skipped out the door wondering what kind of trouble I could get into tonight.

Bouncing down the steps I was shocked to find Neville waiting for me by the fireplace. Him blushing when he saw me.

“Wow, you look great.”

“Aww thank you.” I say, smiling my head falling to the right.

“Are you ready to go? Harry and Ron already left.”

“Of course they did. Those two are gonna get each other into a lot of trouble one of these days.”

“Haven’t they already?” He asks, as we start walking out into the hallway.

“Yeah, they seem to every year.” I say, smiling at the thought of their antics.

Neville laughs nervously the rest of the walk to the party filled with easy small talk.

When we get to the party it’s in full swing. The twins were vetting people before they came inside. They also hand everyone a drink as soon as they come in.

“What is this?” I ask, looking at the shot. Whatever it was, the liquid moved inside it.

“A little of this.” One twin said.

“And a little of that.” The other one said.

“Will it make me forget tonight or do anything against my will?”

“No!” They both say looking shocked I would even ask.

“Fine. Bottoms up boys.” I say living the shot to them then knocking it back.

A sweet taste filling my mouth and running smoothly down my throat. It makes a warm feeling settle through my body.

“Great you have fun tonight.”

“Always.” I say winking at them and walking into the crowd of people. Neville right on my heels.

“Are you okay?” He asks me over the music.

“Yeah, why?” I ask, looking at him. Noticing how flushed his cheeks were.

“Your face is really red.”

“Yours too. Must be the drink.” I say shrugging, as the music grows louder.

“Yeah I’ll get you a drink.” He says, smiling, walking into the crowd.

I smile after him, Neville always seeming so sweet and cute.

“You came with Longbottom?” A familiar voice says, making me look up over my shoulder to see Draco standing there, drink in hand. A glare on his face.

His cheeks are just as red as apparently everyone else's.

“You like his bottom?” I ask, acting like I couldn’t hear him. Draco looked shocked and then angry at my question.

I giggle, it dies as soon as Pansy steps from behind him.

“Aww did you have to pay someone to come with you?” She smirks at me.

“No, if I ever do that I’ll be sure to ask you for tips.” I say, not surprised when she tries to step towards me. Draco stopped her.

“Gotta go. Tootles.” I say, getting ready to leave them two alone until warm lights flood the room. The twins climb onto a table getting everyone's attention.

“Ladies and gentlemen. Thank you all for coming.” They say in unison.

“We can’t wait to start the games we have planned tonight.” They say making me roll my eyes at their dramatic flare.

“We hope you all came here with someone you liked because-.” They say looking at each other smirking.

“They are the one you will be staying with tonight.” They say clapping their hands on the word tonight.

The weight of something around my wrist makes me look down seeing a band wrapped around my wrist.

It was thin, gold and silver weaving around each other. It was kinda like a bangle only it had a chain attached. The chain only being six inches or so. The other end of the chain was connected to none other than Draco Malfoy.

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” I say the sound of voices murmuring through the room.

“Now now everyone, the overall game is simple. Play our games or tasks and win to gain keys. The more keys the more links on your chain. Once it reaches three feet the spell brakes. The last couple stuck together loses. Or wins.” The twins say bouncing between each other talking.

I sigh, looking at Draco then at them.

“I’m gonna kill ‘em.” I say, hearing a huff.

“This makes no sense. You two didn’t come together.” Pansy says.

“Clearly not. That’s the point. Whoever you were standing close to is who you are stuck with. I’m just glad it wasn’t you.” I say glaring at her.

“Now first task. Hold hands with your partner.” One of the twins says grinning.

Once again the mix of voices fill the room but soon people start holding hands, a soft popping sound being heard as another link adds to their chains.

“This is ridiculous.” Pansy says, grabbing her partner's hand. Some hufflepuff kid that looks terrified and maybe excited to be stuck with her.

Sighing I reach for Draco’s hand, him snatching it away from me only jerking my wrist up following his movements.

“What are you doing? I’m not holding hands with a filthy mudblood.” He spits at me.

“Well I hate to tell you it’s either do that or be stuck with me all night. Who knows maybe the rest of the year. George and Fred happen to enjoy these kinds of pranks.”

“Fine.” He glares.

“But don’t get any ideas.” He says slowly lowering his hand.

“I wouldn't dream of it, big boy.” I say, taking his hand in mine. A soft pop is heard, another link being added to our cuffs. The cuff grows half an inch. Each link is only that long.

‘Oh joy.’ I think, wondering how long I was going to be stuck with him at this rate.

I look at the crowd of people, some of them still holding hands others not telling me I could let go.

I open my grip, expecting my hand to fall but I’m stopped when Draco’s fingers lace with mine. I look up at him, but find him staring straight ahead like he has no idea what he just did.

“Who are you and what have you done with Draco Malfoy?” I whisper under my breath.

“Shut it.” He whispers back, making me blush.

I clench my jaw hoping he didn’t notice that it would look no different than my cheeks have all night.

Another round of pops fills the room as all the couples who let go of each other gain two links on their cuffs.

I can feel the smirk on my face from Draco making me glare up at him.

“Shut up.” I say sticking my tongue out at him, a cocky smile settling on his lips.

“Enjoy the party. We will give you your next task shortly.” The twins say disappearing.

“Oh my gosh really? That’s not fair!” Pansy says loudly.

“That’s my ear.” I say holding the ear she just screamed in.

“I’m going to find those two and-.” She mumbles going off into the crowd.

“She’ll never find them.” I say, more to myself than anyone.

“Lucky me.” Draco says, sounding annoyed.

“Well if you didn’t want to get stuck with me. Maybe you shouldn’t have been invading my space.” I say back at him.

He looks shocked for a second then sighs.

“Whatever.” He says, his forehead wrinkling up.

“I need a drink.” I sigh.

“Come on.” He says pulling me with him.

“Where are we going?” I say, having no choice but to follow him. I could drop our hands but I wasn’t about to lose two links.

“To get you a drink.” He says, not looking back at me.

“Okay?” I question, wondering why he was being nice.

I’m surprised to see the twins at the punch bowl chatting with a few other people. Neither of them have holding hand buddies. But no one around them seemed to mind.

“Ah, look who it is.” Fred I think says meeting my gaze.

“Shush.” I say, them snickering at my partner.

“I should have never come here tonight.” I say grabbing a cup to pour myself some punch.

“But you did.” Fred says.

“Now you're here.” George says, smirking.

“You two are both idiots.” Draco snaps.

“Calm down anger management.” I snap at him, elbowing him in the side.

“Only I can be me to my friends thank you.” I glare at him.

“Ahh enemies to lovers.” The twins say, nodding to each other.

“We can see it.” Fred says.

“We can.” George says.

“Why do you two have to talk in riddles?” I ask, looking at both of them.

They both shrug and grinning.

“Can we get our next task or whatever over with so I can go to bed?” I ask, not wanting to be here now that I was stuck to Draco all night.

Yes I wanted to win the bet and toy with him a bit but I didn’t want to be attached to him.

“Sure.”

“Whatever you say.” They say, disappearing.

“How do you stand them two?” Draco asks.

“They are funny.” I say shrugging trying to pour me a drink.

“Here.” Draco says holding my cup so it doesn't move then handing it to me.

“Thanks.” I say, taking it off the table and taking a drink.

“I’m surprised you would drink that. After the shot at the door.”

I shrug again.

“I’m already here. No point in worrying about it now.” I say, shifting my weight onto my left hip, making me bump shoulders with him.

“Sorry.” I say straightening back up.

He doesn't answer me. The twins appeared once again in the middle of the room.

“Alright everyone, next task. Show us your favorite couples pose. You have five minutes to decide. Choose wisely you’ll be like this for an hour.” They say, looking directly at me. A devilish grin on their faces.

I clench my jaw wishing I would have brought my wand to curse them.

Voices and music fills the room as people work everything out. Laughs mix in them, seeming to enjoy themselves.

“Oh my gosh come on.” I say dragging him with me.

I don’t give him time to respond as I walk towards the group of couches and chairs.

“I’m not standing for an hour.” I say to him watching the seats get filled up as others get the same idea as me.

Seeing a large chaise I rush towards it getting to it before anyone else.

“Sit.” I say looking at Draco, him looking me up and down.

“Please.” I say through gritted teeth.

“All you had to do was ask.” He says sitting down, our hands separating. It was clear that wasn’t the game we were trying to win anymore.

I watch Draco sit, him leaning back. I knock his legs apart as I climb onto the soft cushion, turn around and plant myself between his legs just as our timer goes off.

#draco malfoy fic #draco malfoy fanfiction #draco lucius malfoy #draco fanfiction #draco fanfic #draco malfoy imagine #draco malfoy x reader #draco malfoy x yn #draco x reader #draco x y/n #draco x you #draco malfoy #draco #harry potter #The Bet

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cult-of-the-eye · 6 months

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Mag 81 A Guest for Mr Spider

FUCK FORMER HEAD ARCHIVIST

Wait I need to check the timelines - this was 2 days after leitner's death

New spooky music???

My man is so fucking dramatic I love him so much "grand of sand behind my eye" love the way he speaks

Yeah FUCK JURGEN LEITNER

Omg the greying hair is canon??

Child in the 90s makes him at most 27 GOD DAMN. I was imagining like mid 30s...can you imagine a fucking 27 yr old using words like "ilk" when talking to you

Oh shit he's an orphan poor guy

Yeah ok a lot of his personality seems to make sense if you realise he was raised by his grandma

You know those memes that are like people raised by their grandparents are exceptionally polite but in a brisk way, talk fancy and are super posh? Yeah that's him.

Getting such neurodivergent vibes

Yeah he sounds like a main character from the start Jesus Christ he's such a kid who got traumatised and then grows up to be a horror protagonist vibes

My First Leitner lol like kids had to be introduced to them at a young age like those my first toys

He's so funny I can just imagine him as an 8 yr old getting super like affronted at this like how dare my grandma think I am of subpar intelligence he's such a little bitch from the start

"The eponymous Mr spider" even talking about his childhood trauma he's busting out the vocabulary

Fuck that story actually kinda rattled me I had my hand over my mouth in shock for most of it

I think it was the bit where the horsefly brought his son and they were both crying that got me, I could definitely imagine it scaring an 8 yr old

The way it drags out as well, with the pages of the same scene it really heightens the suspense

Is his childhood bully someone we should keep track of?? Love how he says Michael probably cause he sees him as a bully lol

It's interesting how despite him bullying him (quite badly seeing as though he beat him up) he's still like yeah but he saved my life and that means he deserves to be remembered

My bro didn't save your life on purpose, he was just trying to make it worse and happened to come to a terrible fate cause of that

I guess underneath it all he was still a kid who watched someone die, knowing they'd get eaten by a fucking spider, he still held him in some regard

The way he specified the guy was his bully even after he was being eaten though lol

He was desperate to get the book back? That's a leitner thing I guess, the book makes you want to keep it so it can finish whatever it wanted to do to you

On my relisten (which I will do once I've finished the series I'm sure of it), I'll have to look out for any reaction of leitners name

I wonder why Jon didn't react more to Carlos vittery's statement, like it must've terrified him? I saw a post a while back explaining Jon's thoughts and IT WAS GENIUS it was like of course he doesn't react, he must be terrified that someone knew about his experience and somehow did this to mess with him or it was a joke and he can't let anyone know that the Head Archivist is not Good at This ugh it's so good I'll tag it if I can find it

AHHHHH HE REGRETS DISMISSING THE OTHER STATEMENTS AHHHHHH

HE FINALLY ADMITS THAT HE NEEDS HELP WE LOVE THIS CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT YES YOU FUCKING DO BITCH.

yeah at least he's right about Elias killing leitner

GEORGIE THE EX GIRLFIEND

ITS SO WEIRD TO SEE HIM ACTUALLY NICE TO SOMEONE WOW HIS VOICE CHANGES SLIGHTLY AS WELL HES LESS ACADEMIC

THE ADMIRAL

Awwww he's so cute with georgie

GHOST PODCAST GHOST PODCAST

THE WHAT THE GHOST T SHIRT IS CANON???? AHH THATS SO CUTE

Can he not go back to his own flat?? Did he bring all his clothes to the archive and then subsequently leave them there? Does he even have a flat??

God Georgie is so nice I would kill for her

It's so funny that an apparent supernatural cynic dated a ghost podcaster

WOW SEASON 3 OFF TO AN AMAZING START I CANT WAIT TO KEEP LISTENING IM GONNA TELL MY THERAPIST ABOUT THIS TOMORROW!!!

#tma #the magnus archives #jonathan sims #jarchivist #a guest for mr spider #the web #tma season 3 #georgie barker #tma georgie #jurgen leitner #what the ghost #the admiral

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whitedemon-ladydeath · 6 months

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New Blog Bio:

I do not tolerate pro-israel, zionist shit anywhere near me. I don't tolerate anti semitism anywhere near me. I will not tolerate anyone who is upholding or supporting the ethnic cleansing and genocide of the Palestinians. if you do, BLOCK ME

if ur gonna follow or interact with my blog pls realize I am very critical towards most acotar content, especially if it involves Rhysand. I am more-or-less a Rhys Anti until further notice and I am hard-core side eye towards Cassian until Rhysand is held accountable for being a shitty person for more than like *checks notes* two pages

I'm not a Tamlin Stan, nor do I particularly care for him, but I have been engaging in thoughtful criticisms of his actions often which involves character analysis so you v likely will see that pop up every now and then

likely you will find:

anti Rhysand

anti/critical IC

anti/critical/pro feyre

anti/critical Cassian posts, maybe MAYBE pro cassian

critical/pro Azriel- I'm pretty neutral towards him

anti/critical/pro elain content [often. w/o being tied to a ship]

pro Lucien

pro Nesta

pro Eris

most pro tog characters

anti/critical chaol (he just annoys me with his high horse)

Pro Ships:

Azriel/Eris/Nesta

Tamsand (lmao)

Feylin [book one]

Elucien

Nesta/Lucien [idk the ship name]

Feycien

Feyssian

Mesta

most tog ships

aelin/manon

malide

chaorian

Anti Ships:

Nessian

Feysand

Elriel

lysaedion

chaolena

My Specific ACoTaR Meta:

SJM + Eugenics + Ableism in her Writing

CoN + the Eternal Perpetuation of Abuse and Toxicity

SJM and the vilification of Ireland in acotar and tog

SJM could have had the HLs give their power to resurrect her wo Rhys forcing them if she played by Faerie Rules

Rhys physically assaulted Nesta

Class Warfare + Class Traitors in ACoTaR

Rhysand + Morally Grey Behavior

My Meta / Aus / etc Posts

tag -> #justice for poor cassian and poor archeron Sisters

tag -> #glasses!elain propaganda

tag -> #slavic archeron Sisters au

tag -> #fix cassians characterization challenge

tag -> #scottish!tamlin

tag -> #welsh!rhys

tag -> #disabled!Cassian

tag -> #my acotar world building

tag -> #appropriated faerie lore in acotar

tag -> #hybern Ireland

tag -> #white feminism in acotar

tag -> #eugenics in acotar

tag -> #eugenics in tog

tag -> #classism in acotar

Other Acotar Meta:

Mor SA'd Cassian

tag -> #acotar tiktok meta

tag -> #acotar meta

tag -> #racism in acotar

tag -> #Nesta is not an alcoholic send tweet

Other:

A Synopsis of The Ballad of Tam Lin

If You're interested:

Mission to have my own Bookstore:

tag -> #mission: cheshire books

TVDverse:

leave season 1 Caroline ALONE. she deserved better 🥺

Damon and Rose's Friendship that is ALL

Esther is Mikaels victim too stop this irritating 'Esther is the real villain'

tag -> #can we stop the overt vilification of Esther Mikaelson and the UwUization of Mikael Mikaelson

tag -> #tvd tiktok edits

tag -> #Damon Salvatore

tag -> #Caroline Forbes

tag -> #Vincent Griffith

tag -> #Shelia Bennett

Shadow and Bone / Six of Crows:

The Darkling Meta

tag -> #David kostyk

Once Upon a Time

tag -> #cora mills

The Hunger Games / A Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes:

Coriolanus Snow Meta

tag -> #thg tiktok meta

tag -> #coriolanus snow

tag -> #reaper ash

tag -> #wovey

Percy Jackson

tag -> #nico di Angelo

completely irrelevant:

tag -> #rural iowa

more to be added!

#acotar #a court of thorns and roses #throne of glass #nesta archeron #anti rhysand #sjm critical #elain archeron #feyre archeron #lucien vanserra #anti cassian #aelin ashryver #aelin critical #rowan whitethorn #Rowan critical #manon blackbeak #manorian #malide #anti chaol #dorian havilliard

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blainesebastian · 1 year

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beach day (ccg universe)

words: 2,375 ship: austin butler x reader summary: (anon request) “ccg and austin take luci to the beach and have a beach day, maybe after award season and they’re just having a fun vacation” warnings: none notes: will be posting again when i come back from disney, tuesday-ish. thanks to anyone who reads / comments / likes / reblogs, much appreciated! tag list: @killerqueenfan, @karamelcoveredolicity, @elizabethrosecresswell, @gigisworldsstuff, @stylespresleyhearted

You know the moment Luci’s feet touch sand that she’s going to be trouble.

She’s never been by the ocean before, so it was obvious to both you and Austin that this small getaway was going to be something. She’s very much used to the park, basically knows that terrain like the back of her hand, can run free under her parent’s gaze to chase squirrels up a tree or talk to some (unwilling) pigeons or find her spot on a swing or slide. But here? New rules, new places to explore.

You make sure you pack everything under the sun for her (pun intended)—sunscreen, floatie swimsuit, a hat, swim shoes, sandcastle building toys, the works. You’ve been to the beach plenty of times, but it’s your first with a toddler.

This was all Austin’s idea, wanting to completely unwind and disconnect after awards season. Nothing too extensive, there’s no need to escape for a complete month or anything, but you can understand the urge to get away and feel refreshed. It’s a restart button. There are so many new projects and passions on the horizon, not to mention Luci makes every day interesting in her own way, you’re just looking forward to unwinding with your little family.

Austin books an air bnb with a patio that leads into the sand and on the water—it’s very exclusive, private, connected to a resort nearby in case they would ever want to be in a pool or visit a restaurant instead of the ocean or cook something. Admittedly, you like the idea of having time to yourself (your husband to yourself), and less possibility of running into any paps (even though you know you’re not completely hidden from the public eye). The almost promise is more than enough.

The resort has a small store that you’re milling around in as Austin takes Luci to the bathroom—you definitely had her use the facilities at the Airbnb before leaving it but, it’s all still a learning curve. Besides, you wanted to get a container of fruit or something to take in the swim bag that you’ve got over your shoulder, perfect to mix with the crackers and cheese that you have already packed. Pushing your sunglasses further into your hair, you adjust your sheer cover-up skirt over your black and white polka-dot two-piece bathing suit. Luci’s got on a matching one piece—you thought you were being very cute and clever with that.

You reach for a small package of pineapple and strawberries at the same time this guy does, both of you kinda doing that awkward laugh and pull-back before he motions for you to go head.

“Thanks,” You smile, picking up the container and checking the price.

“Haven’t seen you around the resort before,” He says, grabbing one for himself and you get what he means even though you know where this is going. The resort is on the smaller side, exclusive, and this is the first time you and Austin have brought Luci over here to check out the small market.

Before you can even say anything—

“Feel like I’d remember someone as pretty as you.”

You let out a slow breath, giving the guy a kind smile, “That’s because I’m actually here with my husband and daughter.”

And you’ve got no idea if the guy thinks it’s some kind of line, because he glances down at your hand and doesn’t see the wedding ring (you’ve taken it off for the beach) and has the audacity to keep going.

“And here I was gonna offer to buy you a drink.”

“She said no,” Austin says as he approaches and you turn to look at him over your shoulder. He’s got Luci in his arms and it looks like he’s put her hair into pigtails since he’s had her. His tone is kinda neutral, probably not to alarm his daughter, but his face is set—eyes a sharp blue, that muscle working in his jawline. “You havin’ trouble with that?”

The guy clears his throat and shakes his head once before backing off, quickly moving towards the cashier to buy his fruit and leave. You sigh softly, giving your husband a warm smile in hoping to melt the ice around him. Sliding your arms around his waist, you lean in and peck his lips.

“Can’t leave you alone for a minute in this suit, apparently,” He teases against your mouth, nipping at your lower lip with his own. “Sharks start to circle.”

A soft laugh rumbles in your chest, squeezing his waist, “No one is circling.”

“Sharks!” Luci exclaims excitedly, “Fishies.” She reaches for your face with both of her hands, clasping your cheeks.

You can’t help but snicker, playfully tugging on one of her pigtails, “Yes, sharks and fishes. We’re gonna go check out their home soon.”

Austin takes the fruit from you to buy and you slip it into the beach tote before heading back outside. The sun is high in the sky, the weather hot but not suffocating, clouds like hazy cotton balls hanging about in the mass blue. It’s literally a perfect day for the beach. You take your sandals off to walk in the sand once you reach the Airbnb, Austin setting Luci down and holding onto her hand so they can work together to find a perfect spot to put their towels down.

Luci points and you nod because this will work, it’s right by the water but close enough to their patio that they can set drinks on the deck instead of in the sand. You throw the towels down, opening them up to sit on and removing your cover up because there definitely needs to be sunscreen. You can feel Austin’s eyes on you and when you look over, you can tell he’s checking you out, his gaze tracing over your skin like his hands would.

Kind of ironic coming from him, how beautiful he is, panels of smooth skin with kisses of freckles on his cheekbones and shoulders. He’s wearing small pieces of accent jewelry, a ring that’s not his wedding band (so he doesn’t lose anything valuable) and a thin silver chain resting around his neck. You playfully stick your tongue out at him as he undresses and he lets out a soft laugh, removing his t-shirt so that he’s just in his fitted swim trunks.

Luci takes off her sandals and attempts to make a run for the water and luckily Austin is quick, he does a half spin and picks her up right out of the sand, “Where do you think you’re goin’?” He asks, flipping her onto her back in his arms.

“Daddy!” She giggles, kicking her legs, “Water.”

“Water,” Austin shakes his head, sitting with her on the towel, fixing her swimsuit straps. “For one, my lil dino,” He reaches for the sunscreen you’re handing him, sitting down on the towel next to Luci. “You need sunscreen, and secondly, you never go in the water without me or mom, understand?”

He tips her chin up to make sure she’s listening and she nods, her eyes bright and wide as she takes a look out at the water, Austin putting sunscreen on her arms and legs while you put a small dollop on her face.

She gives you a cheesy, big grin and you can’t help but chuckle, leaning down to press a kiss to her hair. After you all have a decent layer of sunscreen, both you and Austin hold onto one of Luci’s hands so she’s in the middle and walk towards the water.

Luci has always been a really curious girl, so she’s not scared when she dips her toes in and then a whole foot, squealing as the wave of cool water slips over her ankles and legs. Austin chuckles a little, gently swinging her with his arm into the next wave. She then reaches both of her hands towards him,

“Up!”

You sink into the water, up to your waist, toes curling in the sand underneath you. You smile as you watch Austin lean down and bring Luci into his arms and he slips down towards you, the water reaching his shoulders eventually as you both wade out.

Austin keeps a secure grip on Luci, who claps at the water and reaches for you every so often, touching your hair and shoulder. You dive under at one point and bring up a seashell, which she’s totally enamored by, and you decide that you’ll keep and maybe make it into a piece of jewelry for her one day. It’s a sturdy, nicely shaped, off-white one—almost has this semi-pink hue to it. Perfect to go on a necklace.

It's a lot of time spent in the water until Luci decides that she wants to build a sandcastle for the rest of the day. She’s very particular about the structure, disregarding a lot of what Austin attempts to build, much to your amusement. You take a few videos and post one to your story, Jillian instantly commenting and leaving a mix of love and jealousy in her emojis.

When you head back inside for the day, Luci is definitely spent. You just manage to give her a quick bath and change her into pajamas before she’s like warm clay in your arms. She slumps against your chest, face tucked into your neck.

“Haven’t even had a chance to get my swimsuit off yet.” You chuckle lightly as you pass Austin in the kitchen, who’s quickly changed into a soft pair of gray joggers and a white t-shirt. His hair is slightly blonder today from the sun and in wild curls, cheeks kissed tan-ish pink.

He takes a break from pouring both of you an iced coffee from the fridge and reaches for Luci, “I’ll put her down, you should take a shower—think you got sand in your hair.” He playfully reaches for a strand near your jaw and you smack his hand away.

“Charming.”

He smirks and plants a quick kiss on your cheek before you can hit him again and moves to take Luci down the hall. Shaking your head, you walk to the bathroom and turn the shower on, rinsing and shampooing quick in order to get into more comfortable clothes. When you use your towel to dry off though, it kinda feels like cardboard or like the Airbnb didn’t use enough fabric softener when washing these things. It hurts to use, especially on your shoulders and…

Wait. You wipe the steam off the mirror, turning to look over your shoulder at your back and groan.

“Crap.” You mumble under your breath, pulling your underwear on and towel drying your hair.

You open the door to let the steam out, wincing at the red skin and you’re trying to figure out what you an even put on to lounge in…it’s going to have to be something that’s similar to the strap design of your bathing suit. Ugh.

“Where’s the aloe?” You ask Austin as he comes round the corner from putting Luci to bed.

He takes one look at your shoulders and a soft smile twinges its way to the corners of his mouth, “You do this every time.”

Austin sounds far too amused for your liking…and if you didn’t need him to find the aloe and help you apply it, you’d be throwing this towel at his head. “I do not.”

You wander into the bedroom after dropping the towel in a basket in the bathroom, sitting down on the bed. This is totally not your fault…you kept applying sunscreen throughout your day after being in and out of the water. What else could you do? You sigh softly and tip your head back as Austin comes in with the green bottle, rolling it between his hands to warm up the aloe—honestly, husband points for that one.

“Least it’s me and not Luci.”

Austin hums and settles down behind you, brushing your hair aside and pressing a kiss to your sore shoulder. He squeezes aloe out into his hands and continues to warm it on his palms before gently settling his touch on your skin. You wince a little, closing your eyes, letting out a slow breath as he rubs it in.

“Should start feelin’ better in a few minutes here.” He says, leaning forward to plant a kiss to the back of your head. You smile a little, can’t help it, the feeling of his touch and the heat of his body utterly comforting.

“Today was really nice.” You stand from the bed and reach for a sports bra in your suitcase that has similar straps to the bathing suit you had on today. With a little bit of help from Austin, you wrangle the thing on and…avoid being in a decent amount of pain, so. Pulling your hair up into a bun, you turn to look at your husband, “Luci’s definitely a fan of the beach and water.”

“And seagulls.” Austin chuckles warmly, moving a stray strand of hair behind your ear, “There was a lot of tryin’ to talk to them today.”

“Probably misses her pigeon friends.” You snicker.

But admittedly, this was great. Without doubt something needed after the stress and busyness of award season. You reach out to place a hand on Austin’s chest, your thumb tracing back and forth along his collarbone. You’ve still got time left on this vacation clock, but you’re already thinking ahead—

“We should definitely come back when we’ve got the time.”

Austin picks your hand up and presses a kiss to your fingers, “We’ll make time.” And you smile because you know that’s a promise.

Chewing on your lower lip, you raise your eyebrows, brushing your fingers on his cheek, “You know what we’ve got time for right now?”

Austin lets out a warm laugh, amused, “You gonna be able to do anything with a sore back?”

You playfully push him to lay down on the bed, crawling on top of him until you’re straddling his waist, “Looks like I’ll just have to be on top.”

Austin hums, his eyes darkening blue as he leans up and draws you into a kiss.

#austin butler #austin butler x reader #austin butler imagine #austin butler fic #elvis 2022 #mccall writes things #ccg

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heybiji · 2 months

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hi!!! i just wanted to say i really love all of your MASKS stuff. i'm something of a newbie when it comes to the TTRPG community, but MASKS seems to be not very well-known and i think that's a real shame. i'm a huge fan of old-school superhero-adjacent stuff, especially the silver- and bronze-age ones!

by the way, i was wondering if you'd be willing to share some tips for a first-time GM? you don't have to if you'd rather not! i just figured i'd try asking since i was planning on GMing a MASKS campaign for some of my friends later, but despite my decade's worth of roleplaying experience i've never been in a TTRPG campaign nor a GM (or similar) role before

Thank you so much!! I was just lamenting about how I felt bad for the MASKS tag because it is now flooded with all my npc nonsense hahah so this is really nice to hear.

It's awesome you're planning on running a MASKS game for your friends!! There is an indispensable post on twitter I saw that has a LOT of great tips for running MASKS that I recommend checking out. But for my own personal tips that are just me things, here's what I got. Sorry it's gonna be extremely long-winded, it may take a few months to read through it.

(Note: I am also hugely into RP and probably put more into it than what is necessary, especially with MASKS which is meant to be able to be played out of the box. It was definitely not played out of the box in our case because I require a lot out of myself and everyone else to feel good about running something. if anyone else wants to continue seeing me as a normal human being please don't click the Keep Reading)

Since you're running it, make the world interesting to you. If the world runs around themes you're personally interested in then you'll have a much easier time coming up with answers on the fly. For me, themes I'm interested in that lend themselves well to a superhero world: money, power, family, celebrity, media, the 24 hour news cycle and the desensitization of violence. Because I'm interested in this stuff anyway, wrapping a world around them makes it much simpler for me to figure out how the world ticks and thus how the characters fit into it and how the world reacts to them, and I am DESPERATE to find out how the characters react to all the questions and expectations the world is imposing upon them.

Make sure your players have a good grasp of the tone of story so they can make characters that gel well within it. For me the tone is a lil more adult because I'm not personally into younger morality tale stories in tone, it's pretty grounded, and I think comedy and tragedy work hand in hand so I lean into them.

Talk. A lot. Talk about the characters, talk about the world. MASKS is fun because it's a LOT of talking and figuring out the narrative together. It's not a lot of crunchy mechanics, it's all around seeing how the characters react to the world narratively, all hurt and comfort and emotions which (for me) requires people to have a good grasp on their characters and the world. I like to give my players "homework" where I ask them a question involving their characters in some way like "what hero did your character look up to as a child?" so they get to come up with past heroes, or "How does your character feel about _____?" etc etc. The only fans are gonna be your table and fans love to talk so be the biggest fans of the PCs!!

Figure out your framing. I know in MASKS they suggest framing it like a comic book, and basically talking about the frames on screen. For me, because I'm more into movies and tv than comics, I frame it like that. So I have an active "camera" in play during sessions and will ask things like "would anyone like to grab the camera?" to encourage the players to put the character into a scene or "what does the audience see as the camera focuses in on your character in this emotional moment?" There is a LOT of playing up to the camera and framing the sessions as episodes of a show, so it's like, okay, you have several options but what is going to be interesting for the audience to see? I find this encourages the players to have their characters take bigger swings and feel comfortable letting us into how their character is feeling because it all looks GREAT on camera. The camera loves it. The PCs are the story after all.

Because I frame it a show, I also like to play individual ending songs over the "credits" at the end of each episode. So I asked my players to make playlists for their characters so if I feel an episode had a lot of emotional focus on one character in particular, I can play one of their songs at the end of the episode! I also made a general MASKS playlist with a bunch of songs from the era we set it in (2004) to pull from. It's a fun little addition that I really enjoy and that I hope makes it all feel more special.

The Dino Donut Effect: create landmarks in your world. (OK THIS IS GONNA BE LONG BUT WORK WITH ME HERE) They don't have to be locations, more solid landmarks of the story that the characters can refer back to and lean on to make the world feel more "real." I call it the Dino Donut Effect because in our world the thing that made everything click into place was talking out the backstory of one of the PC's figuring out they had the power negation ability. We were talking one night trying to figure it out; we wanted the character to fall out of a building and be caught by a flying superhero and accidentally turn off their powers, so they toss the kid to another flying supe whose powers also get turned off. But we were like... holy shit what is the height of a building needed that can handle this much action in the air without them hitting the ground in 3 seconds. So after a long night of talking about terminal velocity and looking at Splat Calculators we figured out the height of the building, and we needed them to crash into something that wouldn't fuckin kill them. The first suggestion was a truck full of bananas. Nah. We landed on a giant balloon that could take the impact. And the balloon became a giant T-Rex holding a donut that was the mascot of the city's beloved decades old donut shop Dino Donut. And so we decided that one of the two flying supes grabbed onto the kid and the other and flew into the giant balloon to try and keep them all alive, which destroyed the balloon, which was a city institution, and there was a crowd of children there that day that saw their friend Dino Donut die. Killed by a superhero. The balloon deflated loudly so it sounded like Dino Donut was screaming in agony. All the kids were traumatized (screaming crying throwing up), the city was furious because everyone loved Dino Donut, it was constantly in the news cycle, and it ruined the career of the supe that "killed Dino Donut." AND THEN THEY REPLACED THE DINO DONUT BALLOON WITH A LAME "UPDATED DESIGN" DINO DONUT STATUE which everyone hates and people consider to be a memorial to the old Dino Donut. ANYWAY, the Dino Donut effect is that now all the PCs have one single incident to refer back to that they all have feelings about. A couple of them were there that day and heard Dino Donut scream, one is now the protege of the disgraced superhero that killed Dino Donut so she feels uncomfortable talking about it, there's the kid that was saved that day but was sworn to secrecy by the supe so no one would find out about his power negation ability, and then there's the kid that wasn't there because she's an alien that just arrived to earth and now the kids have to explain the incident to her with all their varying opinions. Now the PCs' meeting spot is at a Dino Donut. Having this one solid incident that is both funny and kind of goes into the themes of the world has been an absolute treat. Creating "landmarks" like that in the world has done so much and now I'm like okay I'm gonna try to do this moving forward with any other thing I run.

anyway these are my extremely specific to me tips. my RP standards are kind of high which makes me a bit of a terror but also when the flowers bloom from it it feels GREAT. i'm not sure if this will help but hopefully there is something there that can be useful!

MASKS is fun and simple once you get the hang of it, though, so I'm sure whatever you do you and your players will have a lot of fun! especially if you're someone who is into RP which is the background I'm coming from too; MASKS is extremely narrative! i'll be looking in the tag for your game hehe

(The Day Dino Donut Died art by JD)

#masks: a new generation #ttrpg #text post #biji text #i am so sorry this is incredibly long but i just really really really like RP SLKDGM #also another tip: make the npcs hot #hot npcs are great okay #this is the advice from someone who has run checks notes 2 episodes of MASKS #2 episodes but like 7 sessions in total because what it is time management #i've also known my players for a many years and we met in an RP group so i felt more comfortable being this level of intense with them #otherwise i would have tried to be a lil more laid back and normal...........#but also as the GM you're going to be doing a LOT of work so it's fair to ask your players to do some work too to help lighten the load!#have fun!!!! MASKS is a lot of fun!!!

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ladamedusoif · 4 months

Text

Books (Professor!Ben x OFC Lydia)

A Merry Fic-Mas - December 14

Part of A Merry Fic-Mas: A Holiday Fic Calendar - click for masterlist.

Follow @ladameecrit for my writing updates!

Pairing: Professor!Ben x OFC!Lydia (part of the Visiting universe)

Word count: 848

Warnings: Language, angst, pining

Rating: Teen

Summary: What’s the harm of imagining an alternative future, when you’re lonely this Christmas?

This Fic-Mas story can be read as an add-on/deleted scene to Chapter 8 of Visiting, 'Sister Winter'.

Iceland has this thing called Jolabokaflod - literally, “book flood”. It can mean the rush of new books published for Christmas gifts, or it can mean the tradition associated with them.

Put simply, the idea is that on Christmas Eve, you exchange books with your nearest and dearest. And then everyone snuggles up in bed, armed with hot chocolate and candy, and reads their new book.

It sounds like heaven.

The book flood tradition pops into your mind as you place a neatly-wrapped selection of books under the tree at your parents’ house on Christmas Eve. And with it, a pang, and another thought.

Ben would love that.

“Fuck,” you mutter to yourself, trying to fend off the thoughts of him. “I think it’s time for bed.”

You creep up the stairs, last one to turn in for the night, and nestle in with your hot water bottle.

You wish he was keeping you warm, girl.

“Fuck.”

Sleep doesn’t come easy. And you begin to imagine, to let yourself daydream (if one can call it that) about an alternative reality, an alternative future, if only for the night.

It is Christmas, after all. It’s canonically a time for what might have beens, for counter-factuals. What was A Christmas Carol, if not that? And - even more obviously - what of It’s A Wonderful Life?

Alright, you think, maybe it’s not quite the same. Clarence the Angel had to show George Bailey how much better he made the world, and how wonderful his life actually was. And Dickens showed Scrooge terrible things, to help him change - a far cry from the cosy scene you were about to conjure up.

Still, the point stands. What if things were different? What if things could be different?

You close your eyes and let your mind wander, telling yourself it’s just idle fantasy. It’s not hurting anyone. Right?

So indulge. Find comfort in thinking about how it might be, could have been. Imagine the comfort of books, of warmth, of him.

You had thought for a long time about the book for Ben. Eventually, you settled on a personal favourite, one that reflected your personality, your interests, yourself: The Belly of Paris, by Émile Zola. You knew he hadn’t read it - “just Thérèse Raquin and Germinal”, he’d told you as you raved about Zola’s books - and you wanted to see what he thought.

The edition is a recent translation, a handsome paperback, and you wrap it up in brown paper and add a length of dark red ribbon, placing it under the tree to await Christmas Eve.

The next day, it’s joined by a matching book-shaped gift: this time wrapped in dark green paper, your name written in his distinctive handwriting on an old-fashioned gift tag.

Christmas Eve is idyllic: mulled wine, old movies, talking and preparing food for the next day’s meal as the snow falls softly outside. By about 8 that evening, you’re settled cosily on the couch and your eyes land on the little packages.

“Time for book flood, I think.”

Ben smiles as you reach under the tree and retrieve the gifts. “You want to open them here?”

“I’d rather do it in bed, baby. C’mon, grab some hot chocolate.”

He follows you upstairs to bed, making you giggle as he purrs in your ear: “Gonna make you read soooooo much, Lyd. We’re gonna read so hard.”

You wiggle your eyebrows at him as you join in the suggestive jokes, pulling him close to you. “Well, you know I can keep reading for hours, Benjamin.”

You can. And you do.

Ben’s book gift to you is a gorgeous vintage copy of Love in the Time of Cholera, which you clutch to your chest in delight. He opens his parcel carefully, a wide smile spreading across his face as he recognises the title.

“Émile. Of course.”

And now it’s just the two of you, side by side in bed, the only sounds the occasional crackle from the tall candles you’d lit in the bedroom, one or both of you sipping your hot cocoa, and the turning of the pages.

Without lifting his eyes from Zola, Ben’s left hand finds your right, and holds it: safe, secure. Your thumb traces over his tattoo, making him hum quietly with pleasure.

“Imagine if we hadn’t figured things out”, you muse, eyes still fixed on Garcia Marquez.

Ben turns and looks at you, eyes warm and expression most serious. “Not figuring things out was never an option.”

When you wake in the grey light of Christmas morning, it takes a moment for you to remember.

The pain hits you all over again. The fantasy - simplistic and all as it might have been - had been too convincing, and facing reality feels even harder.

You can hear your family already waking and pottering about the house, little nieces stampeding out of the spare room they’re sharing with your sister and brother-in-law for the holidays.

Craving the warmth of a familiar hand on yours, you turn over and cry into the pillow.

#a merry fic-mas #holiday fic calendar #mr ben snl #mr ben au #professor!ben #professor ben x OFC #visiting fic #visiting inspo #mr ben x ofc #mr ben fanfic #pedro pascal character fanfiction #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal #pedrostories

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actualbird · 11 months

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hi zak! I saw the tags you left on a reblogged post about Luke and suffering in relation to catholicism and that made me think. one of my classmates used to mention "the catholic guilt" (particularly about having desire), and I just thought it fits Luke so well. He felt so guilty about loving Rosa (and leaving her alone...) for so long T-T. Also, I'd love to hear more of your thoughts about catholic and filipino luke if you'd like to write about it!

irt to these deranged tags i left on this post abt suffering as salvation and luke forever ago, screencapped below for reference

hello hello! sorry this response took Ages but now im finally down to answer this so....

//steeples hands.....is luke pearce catholic coded? to Me, yes, and ive been casually throwing around this concept ever since 2021 HAHA. the filipino bit is actually just me projecting, so i wont go too much into that, but the religious bit Is something i wanna talk about. and i apologize in advanced for how long this response is gonna end up being

quick disclaimer b4 i start tho: im Not a theologian or an expert in religious theory, im just some guy who went through over a decade of catholic school and lives in the philippines, a primarily catholic country. this whole response is not saying "catholicism bad." it's more the institutions from where we experience catholicism from can twist it into something harmful, and i got to experience that first hand and how it affects one's view of themselves

ANYHOO, LET'S START FROM THE BEGINNING

like....the Beginning beginning

part 1: in the beginning, adam and eve did an oopsie so now we're all saddled with original sin (i swear this is important to luke pearce, bear with me)

quick recap on those who are unfamiliar: in the book of Genesis, god told adam and eve not to eat from the tree of knowledge. and then they did. this was the first ever sin in the history of humankind, and it is inherited by all humans through birth. so like, yay, happy entrance into the world, newly born baby child! you are guilty of sin already. this original sin is most usually absolved though through baptism, so it's not too much of a problem. but what im interested here is less of the nitty gritty semantics and more of the concept this all puts forth:

that under catholicism and similar denominations, a child, somebody who has not done any wrong at all, is inherently tainted by sin

now, the Good reaction to sin or any wrongdoing one has done is to recognize it and to atone for forgiveness. and within the "recognition" part is where guilt lies. functionally, guilt has a purpose. it makes us realize that we had done something wrong, it makes us feel remorseful, and it adds motivation to atone, to turn a new leaf, and to be better. in healthy amounts, guilt is useful and a natural part of being conscious over the things you do. and in unhealthy amounts, guilt is agonizing.

but thats for stuff you actually Did.

if the thing you are guilty for isnt actually something you were responsible over, the guilt cant do anything to make any of it better. you cant be a better person from it, because you didnt even do it. it just sits there, making you feel horrible for something that was out of your control. but because guilt is a Good thing to do, it doesnt matter if it's functional or not. it needs to stay. because it's Good, and the sin youre saddled with (whether or not you were responsible) is Bad

now let's bring in luke

luke's parents died when he was very young. this led him to living with mc's family, and a huge insecurity and fear he had from the beginning was that he felt guilty for burdening them, for stealing the love and care from mc's parents when that shouldve been for mc alone. the story SSR Shape Of You goes into this particular childhood experience extensively (and i highly reccommend it to anyone who hasnt read it yet), and tells us that his guilt was so bad that he wanted to run away and even erase himself from existence.

but luke didnt even do anything wrong

at the time, he was a child. he had no bearing whatsoever in the accident that killed his parents, he had no sway over who wouldve ended up looking after him, he had no control over the situation. like a newborn baby born under catholic doctrine, luke finds himself inherently tainted by and guilty for the circumstances that landed him to where he was.

this kind of pattern is going to follow him for the rest of his life, and the concept of inherent sin and inherent guilt begins to evolve. if luke can find himself guilty for things out of his control, then he can also find himself guilty for things that arent even sins in the first place

key example: love

like you said, luke feels immense guilt over loving mc. but why? love is the opposite of a sin, afterall.

it's just a sin when luke does it. because luke sees himself as inherently bad, and sees mc as inherently good. he sees himself as unworthy of her or someone who will just bring pain into her life, and causing pain someone you love is bad. if love is the knife he uses to hurt someone he loves, then that love is bad. that love should not be realized, and luke should feel guilty for even yearning for her.

by this point i think it's obvious that original concept has become twisted and overly punishing, even cruel. and thats because:

a lot of institutions teach catholic doctrine in an unhealthy and harmful manner. this is why many catholics and lapsed catholics experience The Catholic Guilt(TM). what was originally a pretty reasonable thing gets blown out of proportion from the places we learn these things from, and then getting exposed to this for majority of our lives lets it worm its way into our brain where it'll tend to stay

and if one's brain also has a tendency for self hatred and/or mental illness........well. it all gets worse.

it's clear in canon that luke is uhhhh not the most mentally well individual. his guilt is so overwhelming that it's the driving force in so many of his choices, stories, and experiences. which is big reason #1 for why luke just seems so catholic to me, because of the sheer intensity of his guilt and how he sees himself as inherently bad and unworthy.

but in the roadmap of sin, thats only the beginning. because the process goes:

sin (bad) -> recognition of the bad aided by guilt (good) -> atonement to become better (good)

which leads to big reason #2

part 2: suffering, pain, and misery as atonement

it's important to note that catholicism does not posit that "suffering is good", but there is a clear pattern of veneration for people who endure suffering under noble causes. many, many people in catholic history have been martyred (and many also sainted), one of the biggest examples being jesus himself.

pain is not good, but someone who chooses to take it on for good reasons (self-sacrifice, martyrdom, putting others above one's self) or stays good in spite of all the pain they experienced (unwavering faith, a heart of gold), well, THAT person is good.

however, like a lot of stuff in catholicism, things get twisted into extreme variations because of how it gets taught or experienced. it doesnt take a genius to see how "people who endured pain for good reasons were brave and devoted people" can transform into "to experience pain is inherently noble" when you take into consideration that many sins (like, of the seven deadly sins variety, pride, sloth, lust, etc etc) are variations of indulgence.

specifically over-indulgence, yes, but there's a dichotomy now. here, in the list of Good Stuff are things that feel not-so-good, and over in the list of Bad Stuff are things that do feel good

bad stuff is a sin, and from part 1, sins are things you should be guilty for

and now, to feel good is also bad, so you should be guilty for that. which reinforces the concept that to feel bad is good.

congratulations, you've unintentionally glorified suffering and demonized pleasure! //sad trumpet noises

you can see this kind of thinking pretty clearly in luke pearce. there are the big examples like the previous one i brought up, where he feels so guilty for his feelings for mc. but it appears even in smaller casual situations, like in his 1st birthday event story. this moment was seared into my brain

"can i look forward to this?" is indicative of hesitating in the face of happiness. even something as mundane as anticipating a birthday surprise is something to be approached with caution, feels too good to be true, to be allowed, because feeling good is bad and luke doesnt see himself worthy of it

but okay, we're all guilty now of the horrible sin of enjoying life. what comes next? atonement, becoming better, growing from the bad to become good, right?

and what better way to cleanse one's self from the sin of feeling good but through the nobleness of enduring pain?

luke is guilty over the sin robbing burdening mc and her family -> thats okay he's leaving for college anyway! wont be able to burden them there -> oopsie the NSB happens but hey at least this lone wolf suffering is a great way to atone for his past sin -> oh god the guilt of abandoning mc though -> oh GOD the mission that killed everybody but him -> NEW ACHIEVEMENT: SURVIVOR'S GUILT ON TOP OF THE CATHOLIC GUILT! -> oh GOD he's even guiltier now of his feelings for mc because of his illness, he'll only bring pain to her, how selfish of him to have feelings like this, bad and wrong -> the best way to handle this is to stay away from her to let her live in peace (lacking the pain that luke will bring) and deprive himself of her who brings him joy (inflicting pain of separation onto sinner as punishment) -> the path to salvation (to being good, because only in being Good is someone worthy of love) is through constant suffering and endless self-deprivation

kinda insane how luke's self-perceived sins and self-inflicted sufferings gain compound interest of misery, but his spiral into self-loathing is littered with this kind of nonsensical "because i did [THING], i should deserve pain/NOT deserve happiness"

for luke, suffering became the mode of atonement, it became the solution for sin and guilt.

part 3: conclusion

to wrap this all up, i wanna make it clear that i dont necessarily think luke is like, catholic in the story. nor is even it a headcanon i have. it's more that the intensely self-punishing thought patterns luke has in relation to guilt and suffering are very, very familiar. it resonates in a way that is horridly relatable to people who have experienced these specific catholic experience woes, but it can also resonate in completely different ways to other people as well.

but given that....yeah. based on my own experiences, all this //gestures at too-long response, is why i keep using catholic language and imagery whenever i talk about luke. it's so familiar. he's so familiar. luke would not be out of place in a filipino catholic high school crying during a 3 day retreat

thanks for the ask!!!

#tears of themis #moonstruck-writing #asks #luke pearce #xia yan #tot luke #tears of themis analysis

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buriednurbckyrd · 1 year

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Nothing Stays the Same Forever: Chapter 5

It was difficult to walk to work the next day. She wondered every time anyone glanced at her if they had been at the bar the previous night. Logically, she knew that no one was paying any attention to her. She didn’t have much of a relationship with most of the Jackson residents so they probably just knew her in passing. But she still felt vulnerable and exposed, and by the time she made it to her quiet little work room she was overwhelmed with the wish that she had just stayed home. Still, now she was there, she had made it. With a sigh, she began to set up for her day.

There were a few bags to be looked through that a group had brought back from a scavenging expedition. She busied herself going through the clothing; sorting what could be washed and used right away, what needed patching or repair, and what was only good for scraps or rags. It was all in good condition, including several pairs of mens jeans that still had store tags on them. It was a great find, they rarely came across anything that was still “new” after twenty years of post apocalyptic living.

After taking everything to the laundry and starting a few loads in the washers she was startled when she ran, quite literally, into Ellie who was coming out of her work room as she was going back in.

“I’m so sorry!” She said, when she realized what had just happened.

“S’no worry,” the girl said. “I wasn’t paying attention.”

“Were you looking for me?” Y/N asked, gesturing at the doorway. Ellie nodded and followed her inside.

“Wanted to make sure you were okay.” The girl stuck her hands in her pockets and scuffed her boots against the floor. “Heard people talkin’.” Y/N felt her heart drop into her stomach. She sat down and scrubbed her hands over her face.

“I was afraid of that. Word spreads fast I guess.”

“It’s mostly about Joel.” Ellie told her. “Some of the kids at school heard he killed a guy.”

“What?” Y/N’s head snapped up in shock.

“Of course he didn’t,” she rolled her eyes. “Tommy told me what really happened. Didn’t want to, but he did anyway. Joel just broke the guy's arm, but people are idiots.” Y/N’s breath caught in her throat. He broke his arm? Ellie must have seen her confused expression. “Oh, I guess you didn’t know that.” She shook her head.

“I didn’t. I left pretty quickly.” Ellie hopped up to sit on the work table, nudging Y/N’s knee with the toe of her boot.

“But you know why Joel got so mad. Tommy wouldn’t tell me but he let it slip you were there with him.”

“Please, Ellie. I really don’t want to talk about it.” Just thinking about last night had tears prickling at the back of her eyes.

“Well… The thing is,” Ellie began, sounding uncomfortable. “It’s my fault.”

“Huh? You weren’t there, of course it’s not.” The girl chewed at her thumb nail.

“I cut the lining in Joel’s coat. So he would have to come see you.” More confusion

rolled around in her head. She thought back to the jacket, and how the seam had looked like it had been cut, instead of ripped like most of the repair jobs she received.

“Why?”

“Because he looks at you, watches for you. And he listens when Maria or Tommy talk about you like he’s interested. He pretends he isn’t but he is.” Y/N didn’t know how to respond, too many thoughts happening all at once.

“It still isn’t your fault, sweetheart.” She finally said. “You didn’t make anyone say those horrible things to me.”

“Ah-HA!” Ellie jumped down. “I knew it was something about you! See? Joel likes you and he like, defended your honor. Like those dudes in your books. But you got hurt and if I hadn’t ripped his stupid coat you wouldn’t have.” Her fists clenched at her sides.

“Ellie, sweetie,” she sighed. “It would have happened sooner or later. It’s something I’ve dealt with my whole life. Maybe I thought Jackson would be a different kind of place, but the fact is there are folks that are gonna be nasty no matter where I go.” She took one of Ellie’s hands into her own and loosened the girl’s fingers. “You don’t need to carry that on your shoulders.”

“I heard Tommy tell Maria you looked so sad and hurt. I would have broken more than that guy’s arm.” For the first time since the whole ugly incident, Y/N laughed.

“You know I really like you, kid.”

“You don’t hate me?”

“Nah. Can’t hate someone when they wanna break bones because some dumb guy was mean to you.” Ellie’s face broke into a lopsided smirk.

“Does that mean you like Joel?” Busted.

“You’re really sneaky.” Ellie just shrugged and smirked more. “I guess it does. Is that okay with you?” Another shrug.

“I mean, he’s grumpy as fuck and kinda old but I’m not stoppin’ ya.” Y/N laughed again, and gave Ellie’s hand a gentle squeeze.

…

She ended up working until all of the found clothing was washed, sorted, labeled, and stored. Ellie had left her with a tangled web of thoughts, doubts, and confusion. What did she mean that he looked at her? Joel was nearly always on high alert, he watched everyone. She couldn’t help but wonder if the teenager was setting her up, and the intrusive thoughts shamed her. Ellie was rough around the edges, but she wasn’t malicious. Still lost in her own swirling mind, she tidied up and left.

The days were growing longer as spring edged winter out of Wyoming but it was still mostly dark for her walk home. The dining hall was still crowded with people, so despite the hunger rumbling in her belly she decided against going there for dinner. What if the man from last night was there? She couldn’t stand the idea of running into him. She was sure she had some bread and cheese left in her kitchen so turning away from the busy town center she started her commute back home.

It was quiet on the street. Some of the homes had lights on but they were mostly dark and silent. She stopped in the road for a moment and looked up into the clear evening sky, the moon was only a sliver, but the stars were endless, and would only grow brighter as darkness fell more completely. Something about the sight relaxed her, and she felt most of the tension of the last twenty four hours drop away. Jackson was different, it wasn’t just like every other place in her life. It wasn’t a cutthroat city, moving so fast you couldn’t stop even for a moment to take a breath. It wasn’t a rapidly crumbling world, dissolving into disease and war. It definitely wasn’t the QZ, full of men abusing their positions of power. Jackson wasn’t perfect, but it was somewhere she was safe enough to pause and look up at the night sky to drink in its beauty.

“‘Evening.” Joel’s low voice called out from his porch. She turned from the stars and smiled at him, leaning against a post and looking every bit the rugged cowboy from a story.

“Hi.” She noticed he was by himself. “Ellie out with her friends?”

“Movie night.” For some reason his brief answers charmed her. She really did like the man.

“She came by to visit today.” Y/N took a few steps towards him.

“Yeah?” She nodded.

“Had some interesting things to tell me.”

“Did she?”

“Mmm-hmm. Apparently that asshole left the bar with a broken arm.” Joel’s stance went from relaxed to arms crossed across his broad chest.

“Told you. He got what he deserved.” She stopped at the porch step, and tipped her head back to look up at him.

“You know…no one’s ever stood up for me before. I mean, I did my best before the world went to shit, but people like that…they like it when you react. They want to see you get upset, so they know they have some kind of power over you.”

“People like that are weak.” His voice was hard. “Gonna give me a hard time for bustin’ that guy’s arm?” He looked ready for an argument.

“No.” Joel hadn’t expected that response.

“Hmm.”

“I don’t usually like violence, I’ve seen enough of it the last twenty years. But I do like

you, Joel.” The look in her eyes hit him hard and almost knocked him back on his heels. “Ellie seems to think you like me too.” She watched the muscle in his jaw tick.

“She tell you that?”

“Well, she says you look at me.”

“You’re friends with my brother and his wife, you’re around. Be rude to not look at you.”

“So you asked me for a drink to be polite.” He grunted.

“Not what I said.”

“What are you saying, Joel?”

“Why do you keep sayin’ my name like that?” She put one foot up on the step.

“Like what, Joel?” He gripped her arm and hauled her up to his level, but then seemed to regret the action and let her go like she had burned him.

“I didn’t mean to…Sorry.” He took a step backwards.

“Joel.” She reached out and touched his wrist. “You don’t frighten me.”

“I should.” He looked at her with blazing eyes. “You don’t know what I’ve done.” She nodded in agreement.

“You’re right, I don’t. But you don’t know what I’ve done either, what I’ve had to do to survive.” Her right hand clenched and relaxed a few times at her side. “I’m not here to ask you about what you had to do, and I’m sure as hell not ready to tell you everything about my past either.”

“Then what are you here for?”

“Just you.” She looked down, suddenly shy. “If you want me to be here, anyway.” He lifted her chin with his finger.

“I hate to prove that girl right,” he said quietly. “But I do.” Y/N couldn’t help the nervous giggle that bubbled up in her throat.

“Well here I am.” Joel nodded and drew her closer.

“You really are breathtaking, sweetheart.”

“I want to believe that,” she murmured. “I’m trying to.” She could see him looking at her lips, his tongue flashed out and wet his own. “Please, Joel.” Her whispered plea broke him and he pressed his mouth softly against hers. She clung to him like a burr, and for a brief moment he felt like a young man again, like they were just two ordinary people sharing a sweet first kiss on a spring evening. It scared him, but the fear couldn’t overpower his desire to sink further into her embrace. Something about this timid woman had wrapped around his heart and he didn’t want to try and unravel it. After all he’d been through, maybe it was time he let himself finally try to find a little peace. He gently pulled away and stroked his thumb over her neck where his hand had come to rest.

“Would you like to come in?” He asked her. She smiled at him with a dreamy look in her eyes.

“I’d like to say yes…”

“But?” He braced himself for rejection. She cupped his cheek.

“I’ve never…done this before.” She felt her face heat up with embarrassment when she

saw the meaning of her words sink in. “I need a little time.” He looked lost, like for the first time in a long time he couldn’t pretend he knew exactly what to do. Y/N tugged him back down and kissed him again. “Ask me again. Maybe tomorrow.” Joel’s lips quirked up in a half smile.

“I can do that.”

#joel miller x reader #plus sized reader #joel miller x plus size reader #joel x reader #pedro pascal fandom #tlou fanfiction #soft!joel miller

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justalilpearlie · 2 months

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Introduction/Fun Pearlie Facts

Was abt time I did one of these.

Hello everyone, my name is Pearl, Pearlie or Sam/Sammy if you're feeling like it. Friends also call me Martini sometimes.

I am a minor, my labels... we dont talk about them (fem presenting ftm gay/mlm + trying out gendervoid and verinix + bigender??) uhmm and I go by He/She, tho mostly He/Him by strangers- I can She/Her myself and close friends/mutuals are allowed! (I also go by neos: Void/Moon/Sweet/It/Fluff/Love/Fizz/Paw)

I'm from Argentina, born and raised, never moved. Speak fluent english and spanish.

I got the 'tism and the adhd, aswell as BPD and a few other things I wont list right now! But yeah I'm psychotic (ooo scary word.. lmao)

- -🌄-📀-🌙- -💚- -💛- -✨-🌄-✨- -💛- -💚- -🌙-📀-🌄- -

I'm an IRL of many, mainly c!Pearl (mcyt), Samuel Emily (fnaf [games canon]) and Shin Tsukimi (yttd). If you don't like it you can leave, block me, or whatever, cause you aint gonna change my life or how I am. I'm in therapy, which unlike random hate and harrassment online, does help me :)

I like to roleplay, draw, sometimes make playlists or moodboards.. And my biggest interests right now are Life Series (+ evo + new life), Empires1(+ a bit of e2) and FNaF! (i dont rlly like the books tho lol..)

I use kin tags for reach cause I'd love interaction from any fellow lifers or empires ppl, hermits aswell!! Tho I havent finished s8 or s9 yet...

Fictionkins, therians and traumagenic systems all welcome!

- -💥-🐺-🌙- -❤️- -💛- -✨-💥-✨- -💛- -❤️- -🌙-🐺-💥- -

DNI prefferably:

- Basic DNI criteria (proshippers, homophobes, transphobes, racists, TERFs, ableist, etc)

- Endos/non-traumagenic "systems" DNI. block me if u want, i wont argue abt it in the comments/reblogs. or interact if u want but im not gonna follow u back or anythin shrugs.

- reality checkers or anti-IRLs DNI. I aint "romanticizing" shit, I'm existing and living my life, if thats a problem to you too bad cause my psychologist aproves of what I'm doing, since I aint harming anyone and I myself am doing dandy.

- anti-kin also DNI cause most of my friends are fictionkins and if you talk shit abt my fellas idk i wouldnt like having u around much

CCs interact at your own risk. This is my domain, cyan man & moon lady. /hj

- -🪸-🐸-🌙- -💙- -🩵- -✨-🪸-✨- -🩵- -💙- -🌙-🐸-🪸- -

"Disclaimer"

- I talk about MajorMoon (Scott x Pearl) a LOT, if u didnt notice by the acc theme. These are my romantic memories, its a gay ship, not woman/gay man, so if it makes u uncomfortable or u hate it or whatever then ur probably not gonna like my content lmao. COUGH, consider joining us if you do like what you see... /nf We're a small comunity of supporters.. just me.. and a few of my peeps... that was a joke, sir. /ref

- This isn't roleplay, its my main acc where im ""unapologetically"" myself, but if u do wanna rp life series/empires u can always shoot me a dm and maybe I'll give u my discord.

- I talk about myself (c!Pearl) using 3rd person in many posts tagged with main fandom tags. This is to cause less confusion to casual fans slash ""normies"" (lhj) that well.. don't know what IRLs are! Also that way I feel safer and don't have to worry as much abt getting harassed and such for my identity.

- -🌸-⛰️-🌙- -💚- -💙- -✨-🌸-✨- -💙- -💚- -🌙-⛰️-🌸- -

Special People Mentions!! fps = * (1 or more.. wouldnt say in a priority sorta order but. more or less yea)

Family! <3 🌼@pehpurr* SISTER!! super duper cool, her art is great and you should check it out!! YOU. You're the brightest little girl (i say like ur not older than me) I'VE EVER MET ACTUALLY! You're so passionate and loving I freaking adore you!! I love you so much Scar, you're one of the best things to ever happen to me, Kanny <3 ⚙️@gentlexmadman DAD!! you are my daaaad, you're my dad! woogie woogie woogie! ANOTHER amazing artist! mr "I know that guy-", very funny, Henry "Autism" Emily... the copper king, my father. Speaking to you is always comforting. Love you so much papa, you're amazing :)

Simply special <3 ☕@insomniac-coffeehouse** You're all simply so very special to me. I love spending time with you guys and playing stuff together, you mean a lot to me and I'm so glad I met you. I hope we're still close for this year and many more! You're incredibly talented, not only at art, at everything you do. You spark joy in my brain and my heart <3 From the bottom of my heart, I'm in love with the hope you bring to this world. 🍊Jack***, oh my dear Jacky, where do I even begin, sport... you really are my other half. Mi media naranja if you will. haha.. I love every second we spend together, I love your voice, I love your eyes, I love your smile, your laughter. I love your use of words, the way you speak, your humor, your seriousness and goofiness. You stiff fuck, you were made for me and I was made for you, and I wouldn't have it any other way. You're my everything, mi vida, mi luz, mi estrella. Mi amor, mi mundo. <3

New friends! 🍓@strawberrystarfield I know we met fairly recently but you're all incredibly fun to talk to, your art is also amazing, your accent is real pretty (cough for a bri-💥), you're real sweet and I love reading all your thoughts and critiques about things :} (love ya Aspen /gen) 🏜️@fagdykegtws My right hand man! I know we just met through the rarepair server but oh my god we're in the same brainwave!!! You're so fun to vc and chat with and you got the best ideas ever fr fr, love ya Chewy, you're real sweet even w how lil i know you ;)

That's it folks, love yall and see you around!

#intro post #introduction #c!pearl irl #sammy emily irl #delusional attachment #fictionkin #fictkin #fnaf irl #life series irl #empires irl #mcyt fictkin #mcyt fictionkin #mcyt kin #system friendly #endos dni #mcyt irl

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immortaljailor · 2 months

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9 People to Get to Know Better (Tag Game)

alright...this year I'm resolving to be more of an active participant in fandom...this year I'm resolving to be more of an active participant in fandom...thank you to @dustykneed for tagging me, I'll try to do my best with this!

3 ships you like:

Outside of the obvious (*cough*persistent star trek brainrot*cough*) I'm gonna say Winterbaron (Bucky Barnes/Zemo), Barmaro (Nick Amaro/Rafael Barba from That Cop Show That is Still Somehow Being Aired), and LinSu (Lin Chen/Mei Changsu from Nirvana in Fire aka 琅琊榜). What do these have in common? Almost nothing lol, but maybe there's an argument to be made about a common "on the surface we seem so different/present ourselves differently, but deep down we understand a part of each other in a way no one else does (whether we like/admit it or not)" dynamic.

First ship ever:

I legitimately do not remember this, but I've kept a journal/diary since I was 7, and once I went to look up the entries around when I first discovered fandom (early teens, 12-14 ish) and would you believe it, there's a page of me yelling very passionately about Spones and Mckirk, which...is just mind-boggling to me because I've always thought my first ship was Stanner (Tony Stark/Bruce Banner). So I'm still claiming Stanner, but...LMAO

Last song you heard:

...to answer this honestly, it was technically a rather...sub-par rendition of Eminem's "Rap God" by my very dear sister during last night's post new year's dinner living room karaoke. The last song that came up on my phone playlist though was apparently "San Francisco" by The Mowgli's.

Favorite childhood book:

"Surely You're Joking, Mr. Feynman!" (a collection of recorded conversations between Ralph Leighton and the titular Richard Feynman)—yeah you can tell I was a fun kid 😭

Currently reading:

"The Rise of Modern Chinese Thought" (《现代中国思想的兴起》) by Wang Hui which is like...an analysis of the connection between Chinese political culture and classical Chinese philosophy. I think. I'm only like 50 pages in and I'm discovering that I may be too stupid to really understand what's going on. Also, "Like the Argonaut" by trash_heron on Ao3 which is a (still in-progress) Spones epic that's in the middle of going through all of TOS with some really interesting worldbuilding things and integration of other Trek series with the TOS events.

Currently watching:

The Bear, which I'm enjoying a lot even though I'm watching it...incredibly slowly due to constantly getting distracted by other things 😭

Currently consuming:

Leftover dimsum from breakfast/brunch 👍

Currently craving:

Bones McCoy content, always craving more Bones content 💙💙💙

Tagging (absolutely no pressure!! ...I only have like 20 mutuals so to reach 9 about half of you are being tagged I'm so sorry):

@chucktaylorupset @themf-scholar @youandthemountains @fluffy-leech @fely-v @endren @milarca @bogwarg @hopefulcanary (and anyone else who sees this and wants to do it obviously)

#tag game #cursed.txt

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synobun · 3 months

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One of them tag games

So I wasn't actually tagged by @cour5t in this, but I was tagged by @rosewinterborn in a very similar game, so I'm stealing the first and pretending it's the second, since the second had a few questions that didn't apply to me x)

Last song: I'm gonna do the last song I've had on repeat for this!

Favorite color: I never know what to say for this. Black? Dark red? Dark purple? Dark green? That whole colour palette is the bomb dot com.

Last movie/show: The last movie I watched that was new was Nimona! It was fantastic, 10/10 lives up to the hype. The last show I finished was Reacher. It was okay.

Next on my watchlist: I've finally started watching Criminal Minds, but I'm already kind of burning out on it midway through season two. And there's still like 300 episodes left. Ridic. I should probably catch up on Foundation and For All Mankind. Next movie is the cartoon version of Mulan!

Last game: Prey! I did a replay of Doom 3 a while ago and mused that the horror story-game genre should be revived, and then on a whim I decided to play Prey without knowing anything about it. And it's the exact kind of game I was talking about. It's pretty good.

Last book: Rebirth of the Sigil by Peri Akman. It was disappointing. :/ Especially since I know what the author is otherwise capable of. I had the same thing happen with John Gwynne recently as well.

Sweet/savory/spicy: Savory, I think? I don't have an instinctive sense of what savory is. Google says it's a meaty taste, and I rely heavily on protein, so I guess that. I have a pretty low tolerance for sweetness despite liking sodas and such. I don't like most desserts or can only eat a tiny amount. Spicy is alright but my digestive system disagrees.

Relationship status: *vague gesturing*

Last thing I searched online: The hours for my pharmacy to see if it was too late to pick up my medication.

Current obsession: I am generally not an obsessive person when it comes to, like, interests and activities. But I am an obsessive person when it comes to thoughts and emotions. Lately I've been struggling a lot with thinking about eternity. It has not been fun. On a lighter note, I have also been thinking more regularly about writing. Perhaps someday that will translate into action!

Greatest flaw: How much time do you have? This is actually something I have difficulty answering, because the line between something forced upon me and something that is actually inherent to me is blurred a lot of the time.

I think I'd say how I behave when I'm spiraling mentally. I close off and disappear from almost everyone in my life. Occasionally I can keep up appearances with one group but not the rest, but by and large I become a ghost. When I am in a conversation during those cycles, it's crazy how badly I'm affected. I don't become cruel or mean toward others, but my speech becomes jilted, I can't make eye contact, and I am just devastatingly hateful against myself.

It's partly why I isolate, so that I don't have to expose others to that behaviour. It happens on a yearly basis though, and it can last for weeks at a time, so it has a pretty negative impact on my relationships. I also have no idea how to navigate being in one of those moods while part of a relationship where daily contact is an expectation. When I was part of a romantic relationship, instead of having one big prolonged dip, I would fade in and out of it. A couple weeks good, a couple days bad. Rinse and repeat. Awful. Terrible. Annoying. There's almost no predicting when it'll happen either.

Fic I’m currently reading: I rarely read fics because I have no patience for wading through wish fulfillment, horny writing, and "He would not fucking say that" fics, so there's only one that I vaguely keep up with. My friend has a Mass Effect fic, which can be found here. It focuses on femShep(/Kaidan) and Tali(/Garrus) and is post-ME3.

-----

I tag anyone who sees this and actually made it to the end, tbh. But for sake of poking, I tag @rosewinterborn with this variant, and also @deadlyessencewhispers, @tananaphone, @stupid-elf, @carrotblr, @atinydroid, @imtryingx, and, uh, uh... I don't know... let's see... @kkshowtunes, @d3viantvanguard, and @awritingcaitlin. I probably just tagged everyone who follows me. Anyway thanks bye

#tag game #in which i talk too much and reveal too much

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coro-chan6 · 3 months

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Somehow Supernatural

Tags: teen!oc, gn!oc, poc!oc, Dean being Dean, weird dreams, CROWLEY, demon dogs, Dean being scared of said demon dogs

Summary: Casey goes to bed, has weird dreams, and gets to meet the King of Hell.

Chapter Three: Yummy Food and Weird Shit

I will never deny that I was a foodie. I mean, if you saw me when I devour anything put in front of me, you wouldn’t even have to ask. I love everything about food. Sometimes I mix stuff together that other people think is weird like when I dip my waffles and pancakes in orange juice. I used to be the kid in elementary school who would mix everyone’s leftover lunches together and actually go through with eating it.

One thing I learned from all my years of eating is that post-panic attack meals are the best. After crying half my weight in water and depriving my brain of oxygen, food just hits different. Plus, Dean brought back chicken nuggets.

“Slow down, you’ll choke,” Dean said as he reached his hand to take my nuggies away. I obviously wasn’t gonna just let him do that so, I smacked the shit out of his hand. I didn’t think I put that much power into it but when I heard the smack echo, I knew.

“Mmfh,” I was trying to apologize before he kicked me out on my ass, but my mouth was full of about 4 chicken nuggets. Dean glared at me and went back to eating his double bacon cheeseburger.

Sam had come to sit down across from Dean and me after he had finished preparing his salad. Dean asked if his brother wanted anything from the restaurant, but Sam insisted on eating salad. I love salad as much as anyone, but when someone offers to buy you fast food, you fucking take it. Salad be damned.

Castiel was seated next to Sam opposite of me. He didn’t need to eat, so he was just reading the menu that had come with the fast food. Occasionally, he would look up from his reading to glance at me. It didn’t look threatening, but it did look like he had something to say.

“So,” I had finally swallowed down the colossal amount of chicken I stuffed down my face, “When are we going to go on a hunt?”

“We?” Dean quirked his eyebrow at me.

“Yes, we, Dean. I might as well since I’m here. What else am I supposed to do?”

Dean crumbled up the empty wrapper of his meal, “Nothing.”

“Sam?” I turned to the younger Winchester. He had been really nice to me. He wouldn’t agree with Dean.

“I agree with Dean.”

Well fuck.

So, basically, I was in this new universe and I couldn’t do jack shit but sit underground. That was so unfair! They should at least take me once, but from their faces, it didn’t look like they were gonna change their minds.

What did they even have to do in the bunker? I know they have alcohol. Too much alcohol, in fact, but even if I was of age, I’m not really interested. They also have a library full of hunter books. I know that sounds cool and I shouldn’t be complaining, but who would want to read books about these cool ass monsters if you could see them in person? Not me, that’s for sure.

“They should go on a hunt,” Castiel stated, not taking his eyes off his menu. How was that so interesting to him?

…wait.

“Did you just say I could go?!” I squealed.

“Did you just say they could go?!” The brothers yelled in unison.

“They can go with me,” Castiel said finally putting his menu down, “They won’t be harmed.”

I ran over to the other side of the table to tackle Castiel in a hug because I was so happy. Fried nerves be damned. He kind of froze for a second before awkwardly patting my back. Sam and Dean were still trying to get the angel to not bring me, but he didn’t budge.

“Who would watch them if we’re all gone? They’re a child, they need protection.”

Dean scoffed at that like it wasn’t kind of true before he stood from the table and stalked off. Presumably to his room. Sam shook his head in disbelief before he retired as well.

Soon, Castiel and I were the only ones left at the table. I was still eating my fries and Castiel was staring at me. It would have been creepy if it had been anyone besides him, but he had this innocence about him that didn’t make him all that scary. Even though he was the only one here with powers strong enough to do God-knows-what, he didn’t make me feel frightened at all.

“Casey,” I perked up, “you should get some sleep. It’s late.”

I wasn’t sure how late it was because we were underground and I never asked, but now that Castiel brought up the subject of sleep, it made me yawn. I didn’t even register I was tired. It felt like it’d been so long since I last slept. I wasn’t sure if that was because of my eventful day or because it really had been that long.

I got up from the table and waved Castiel goodnight. I was halfway down the hallway before I realized that I didn’t know where I was going to sleep. No one had given me a room or anything.

I wonder where my body was staying before I got here.

Not wanting to bother anyone, I slinked over to the couch I had sat on earlier and laid down. The couch had a blanket that was thick enough and a couple of pillows that weren’t too uncomfortable.

The thing that made me so uneasy was the fact that it was out in the open. The couch sat against one of the walls of the library. I never did well with new sleeping spaces, but when those sleeping spaces were so big and dark that you weren’t sure what was hiding in there… I did not like it. Plus, I couldn’t watch YouTube before bed.

I’m not sure how, but I eventually went to sleep. I ended up in another void. This time I couldn’t see all my thoughts as words. This time I could see my mom. She was in the kitchen chopping vegetables. There was nothing on the stove and there was nothing in front of her to put the vegetables in. The only thing on the entire counter was the chopping board and the single carrot she was chopping. I wanted to know what she was doing and I tried to ask, but my mouth wouldn’t move. She looked me right in my eyes before she disappeared.

Next, I saw my dad. He was in the garage sitting on his motorcycle. The engine wasn’t running and the garage wasn’t even open, but my dad had all his gear on like he was gonna take off at any second. He wasn’t wearing his helmet though. I was standing in the doorway that lead from the house to the garage. My dad was facing in the other direction. He looked frozen in time. I couldn’t even see his body shift from breathing. It was like he was paused. I tried to walk up to him to tap him on the shoulder, but - again - I couldn’t move. My dad finally turned his face to me. Blood dripped from his mouth. Then, he disappeared too.

I saw my older brother out on the front porch. He was sitting in the gray chair that was facing me yet, I couldn’t see his face. His neck… his neck somehow had his head on backward. His fingers still typed at the computer on his lap even though he couldn’t see it. I didn’t try to move this time, but my brother did. One of his hands lifted off of the keyboard to point at something behind me. Then, he disappeared.

My little brother was next. He was in the basement playing on his gaming setup. Well, at least he was sitting at his gaming setup. His arms were at his sides and he was staring at a blank screen. I was standing directly behind him. I wanted to run. I didn’t want to see this creepy shit anymore, but I was stuck in place. I had to watch my little brother melt into a pile of flesh in his chair.

I didn’t like this dream. No matter how hard I tried to wake up, I couldn’t. I was stuck. Stuck watching some creepy version of my family from afar. I wished that I could hear Dean’s voice again. I wished he would wake me up by shaking my arms like he did before, but his voice never came. No one ever came. This wasn’t me feeling like a failure that didn’t deserve to be saved. I wanted to be saved. I needed to be saved.

“Save me!” A voice echoed through my head that I’d never heard before. I never heard this voice before, but I felt linked to them somehow. I wanted to reach out and save them like I wanted someone to save me. For the first time since my dream started, my body moved. I reached my hand out for this voice. I swear I felt them reach back.

~~~

“Fuck!” I woke up sitting straight up on the couch I fell asleep on. My hand was outstretched like I was reaching for… something? Someone. Who was I reaching for?

My blanket and pillows had fallen to the floor which wasn’t a surprise to me. Even when I wasn’t having creepy ass weird ass dreams, I was still a wild sleeper. What the fuck was that dream about anyway? I liked to believe that all dreams mean something, but I didn’t understand that one. Or maybe I was too scared to want to understand it. I’d come back to it later.

Right now, I was more concerned with the man sitting in the library. He looked concerningly like the King of Hell.

“Hello… new child,” Crowley said in his british accent. He was casually sipping on some of Sam and Dean’s alcohol stash. I felt underdressed even though I was wearing the same shit since I got here. It wasn’t half bad, but I kinda wanted to meet Crowley looking like myself. Or at least with my own dressing style and not this cringe shit. He was one of my favorite characters after all.

“How long have you been there?” I asked, slowly placing my feet flat on the floor.

“Not that long,” he shrugged.

I got up and walked toward him. I know he’s the King of Hell and all that jazz, but I really wanted to shake his hand. He didn’t look like he wanted to hurt me. He actually looked kind of curious.

I offered him my hand, “I’m Casey. Nice to meet the King of Hell face to face.”

Crowly smirked and shook my hand, “You know who I am and you think it’s nice to meet me. I’m surprised the Winchesters haven’t told you-”

“Get away from him!” Sam shouted as he practically slid into the room. It seemed like he rushed in here so fast he forgot to put a shirt on. He was only wearing his blue-patterned pajama pants. I looked at him with a ‘what the fuck’ face before turning back to Crowley. I know Sam was trying to look after me and shit, but he was not gonna make me walk away from the motherfucking King of Hell.

“I have so many questions if you don’t mind,” I told Crowley as I sat next to him. Sam let out a sound of protest, “What do the demon dogs look like? I know the whole thing is not seeing them, but I’ve always been curious. Also, what’s your favorite task to do as the King of Hell? Do you enjoy torture or do you only do it because you have to? Are other demons dumb cause how do they get killed by Sam and Dean so easily? Do you have wings-”

“You have to give me time to answer, you know,” I snapped my mouth closed, “For your first question… I could bring the demon dogs here if you’d like.”

“Yes!” I squealed.

“No!” yelled Sam.

Crowley brought out the summoning whistle from his jacket pocket. Sam looked like he was about to pass out, but he somehow managed to stay upright. I sorta forgot that Sam had trauma from the demon dogs. They killed his brother in what? Season 3?

I didn’t think Crowley was actually gonna go through with it, but he blew the whistle. I guess if the dogs don’t have orders to kill anyone, they won’t… hopefully.

“How can you tell when they’re here-”

I was cut off but something warm and wet wiping up my face. I let out a yelp of surprise before I realized it was most likely the dogs. I cautiously reached my arms out to feel for its body. My hands connected with soft fur. The dog or dogs - I felt multiple tongues licking at my face - were pretty big by the feel of it. Maybe the size of a pony? They were muscly as hell though.

“How many did you call?” I asked Crowley.

“Just one. They have multiple heads. You can ask Dean about that.”

Sam gave the demon a glare for his assholish comment before he spoke up, “Why the hell are you here, Crowley?”

“Well,” Crowley looked back at me. I bet it looked like I was petting air, “I came here to see them.”

Sam was confused. I was confused. Why the hell did the King of Hell have business with me? Even though I had no idea what Crowley wanted with me and whether or not I was in danger, I kept petting the demon dog. I didn’t know when I was gonna have the opportunity to do this again.

“You’re not taking them,” Sam said, pulling an angel knife from his ass.

“I’m not taking them. Calm down, moose,” Crowley finally stood up from his chair, “I just wish to talk with them.”

“I don’t see why not,” I pipped in.

“He’s the fricken King of Hell!” Sam yelled like ruling the underworld was a crime.

“And?” I replied.

“And you're not talking to him!”

“Well, last time I checked, you weren’t the fucking boss of me, dude.” I stood up from petting the demon dog and gave Sam a glare. I was getting fed up with Sam telling me what to do. First, he told me he didn’t want me going on hunts, and now this? I hadn’t even known him for a full 24 hours!

“You’re a child, Casey! No!”

“I’m not your fucking child, Sam, so buzz the fuck off!”

The demon dog started barking really loud after I said that. The air stilled. Crowley was smirking throughout Sam and I’s whole argument, but now his face was filled with genuine surprise. Sam looked scarily angry.

“You lied,” Sam stated. The angel knife that was once pointed at Crowley was now pointed at me, “You are some kind of monster.”

“What the fuck are you talking about?” I said, breathless. Fear shot up my spine.

“Your eyes… they turned red.”

AN: Crowley's one of my favorite characters and in later chapters sometimes he just comes back for not reason other than I like him. I know I do shit on Dean, but like, I still like him. He's just not my favorite out of the trio. And yes, superpowered OC. Gotta love it.

#spn fanfic #oc character #crowley #nonbinary #teen!oc #poc!oc #gn!oc #sam winchester #deanwinchtser #dean x castiel #castiel #demon dogs #weird dreams #superpowered oc #supernatural #spnfandom #spn fandom #supernatural fanfiction

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