Tumgik
syntheticsposts 2 years
Text
todd: did i ever tell you how great you cook?
dirk: uwu no...
todd: then why do you keep doing it?
25 notes View notes
syntheticsposts 2 years
Text
todd: what would you do with your brain if you had one?
dirk: well I would~
dirk: wait 馃槕
36 notes View notes
syntheticsposts 2 years
Text
dirk: I accidentally scratched Todd's guitar. How long do you think I have to fix this?
amanda: ten
dirk: ten?
amanda: nine
119 notes View notes
syntheticsposts 2 years
Text
todd: WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?!
dirk: I thought it was romantic to release birds at a wedding.....
todd: you released OSTRICHES
142 notes View notes
syntheticsposts 2 years
Text
arthur: spider in the bathroom!
merlin: well give him a little towel
85 notes View notes
syntheticsposts 2 years
Text
dirk: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
todd: Everything is fine.
dirk: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
todd: everything is ok, you can do it.
dirk: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!
todd: it is not so scary.
dirk:...
todd: are u calm down?
dirk: No, I'm tired of yelling.
106 notes View notes
syntheticsposts 2 years
Text
todd: come on, touch it, you feel how hard it is
dirk: yes ......
todd: how many times did I tell you to put the bread in the bag
50 notes View notes
syntheticsposts 2 years
Text
dirk: why can't dinosaurs clap?
amanda: because their paws are too short and....
todd: because they all died.
27 notes View notes
syntheticsposts 3 years
Text
farah, bringing a huge cake into the room: happy birthday, Todd, this is for you!
todd:
todd: Dirk's inside the cake, huh?
cake: no
120 notes View notes
syntheticsposts 3 years
Text
dirk: time to get busy
todd: it's 2am
dirk: does this change anything?
todd: people sleep at this time
dirk: weaklings
73 notes View notes
syntheticsposts 3 years
Text
stewardess: we are in a turbulence zone. make sure all small things are safe.
dirk: 馃憖
todd: what?
dirk: are you safe?
todd: I'm going to hit you now.
142 notes View notes
syntheticsposts 3 years
Text
dirk: Todd has delicious chapstick
amanda: wow, did you kiss?
todd: no, this asshole ate my lipstick
123 notes View notes
syntheticsposts 3 years
Text
dirk: I like you
todd: I've always said that you have a problem with taste
143 notes View notes
syntheticsposts 3 years
Text
todd: I don't know how to flirt, so I'll stare at you until you marry me.
68 notes View notes
syntheticsposts 3 years
Text
todd: let's go buy wedding rings
dirk: not early? What if I still change my mind?
todd: well then make yourself a gold tooth
dirk: what do you mean? Which tooth?
todd: WHAT I WILL KNOCK YOU IF YOU DON'T AGREE WHAT DO YOU LAUGH I AM SERIOUS
51 notes View notes
syntheticsposts 3 years
Text
dirk: something incomprehensible is spinning in my head
todd: the brain?
86 notes View notes
syntheticsposts 3 years
Text
ditk: Todd gasps, I need to call 911 but button 9 doesn't work!!
tina: Flip the phone and press the 6.
dirk: you are a genius!
todd: *stops choking* what the fuck
68 notes View notes