❛ why are you still here ? ❜ / daeho and ivy . for pain purposes !
@oldspoet // nothing but vulnerable
beneath his skin like a disease , like the fragile bones barely holding his entire being together , like the literal universe in his blood - that's what she is , to him . a disease , an expansion , everything . perhaps that is why her words , so gentle and quiet , can sting like his own nails dragging harsh lines through his back to free the ink in his body . he winces , unable to school stoic features in time ( perhaps in the half - gloom of a barely lit room can he hide it ) . he winces , and then his jaw clenches until he swears he will shatter teeth beneath teeth . why is he here , indeed ? this - what this began as - was never supposed to last as it should . daeho was never supposed to listen to her jokes with chagrin curling corners of lips , a beautiful sunshine smile spilling onto features ; he was never supposed to stay .
he feels weak , all at once . it crashes through his core , settles in his gut like a leaden weight , and a muscle tics in jaw . his fingers curl until they are fists , until nails kept just long enough to scratch dig into meat of palms with intent to draw blood . when gaze meets ivy's , it is with carefully crafted vitriol ; with the same venom and disregard as once upon a time ago ( it is foreign , a mask , a lie ). "to get my shit . you want me gone , let me hear you say it and i'll go ." can she hear the almost desperation tinging vowels and slinging through consonants ? can she see the way he glares her down that he means anything but venomous words ?
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The masculine urge to create a safe and protective environment for her because you know she deals with a lot
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❛ i can’t do this without you . ❜ / our og asayu !!! <3
@oldspoet // nothing but vulnerable
mottled purple colors ridges of knuckles , a new motley of bruises from the most recent of excursions into the world in desperate search for humanity in its rawest form . he's distracted by the deep hue of it , unwilling to lift gaze just yet to meet his ; unwilling to face head on the very reason his heart is galloping dangerously beneath tight ribcage . everything is so familiar yet eggshell - fragile ; one misstep and chunyu might just destroy what tentative relationship they've formed again ( and that scares him more than the final goodbye shared once upon a time ago ; he cannot do this alone , he refuses to ).
but oh he is a romantic ; oh he is so foolishly gone for asahi that every word drags his attention from wherever it dares wanders . gaze lifts to seek out warm gaze and his heart skips a pathetic beat . foolishly in love ; happily in love ; moonstricken . he reaches out , with the same hand bruised purple and black , and he tightens digits where they interlock in perfection , and familiarity ( how could they have thought that this perfect interlocking was wrong , and unneeded in that time ? foolish idiots ). he tugs forth hand until he can brush a feather - light peck to ring finger , a promise and a vow and a determination . " together , okay ? "
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❛ don’t run away from this . ❜ from lara
@wcvensouls // nothing but vulnerable
he is freezing cold , shoulders shivering beneath threadbare shirt , arms locked 'round scrawny torso as if he can fight the frigidness icing his veins over . it's been one too many days since something intoxicating and noxious has made a home of his lungs , and he is starving . starving , and pitiful , and desperate for something that lara cannot provide . he stares blankly at her , at the way worry and ache and something forbidden colors her expression dark . he is freezing , iced over like the ocean's depth , and he shies away , retreating into threadbare clothes .
run away . flee . hide . get away from here . it's as prominent in insu's thoughts as the starvation is underneath his flesh . he wants to flee , to seek out touch that hurts where it barely pricks into conscious mind , to seek out noxious pleasures so that he knows he is still alive , and here . he shakes his head , vicious and rabid and desperate . what is he saying no to ? to her presence , soothing and aching comfort in her warmth ? to her help , careful and gentle where he does not deserve it ? yes , no , he does not know . he shivers , gaze hollowed out , expression pinched and pained . " f'ck off . " he doesn't mean it , tone lacking vitriol . ( ' sorry , please stay ' is what is meant instead ).
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❛ thank you for being gentle with me . ❜ from minako
@wcvensouls // nothing but vulnerable
dawn is creeping over the horizon , if the way baby pink and tangerine orange begins to dance in between blinds barely cracked , if the way the static in his ears is intense and oppressive despite the hum of melodies twirling through his mind . their third has tapped out hours ago , despite boasting to last the longest in their impromptu all - nighter , and he is caught pinned underneath legs strewn over lap and arms tugged 'round waist . he smiles , dopey and sleep - deprived , and he turns to seek out his only competitor in all of her beautiful , beautiful glory .
fingers lift to brush along curve of cheek , trailing over soft skin to press into corner of lips in gentle ministrations , in mindless need to sate the starvation in his lungs , in dopiness brought upon by the lack of sleep . hyunjun's lids flutter , sleep creeping in at the edges of his vision - he is one deep , slow inhale before he , too , taps out . but her words filter in between dulcet notes weaved between thoughts , and gaze blinks to meet hers - mina comes into blurry , slow focus . she's beautiful , and such a thought renders him mute for an infinitesimal moment . gorgeous , beautiful . " anything f'you , baby . " he tries to assure that her heart is cradled safely in his hands . but words are not his strong suit , and exhaustion dims his vocabulary even further . ' i love you ' as much as he can manage it now , when dawns blossoms .
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❛ i have to do this alone . ❜ (from Minsung. Also welcome back ^^)
@r3dblccd // nothing but vulnerable
oh his heart aches in two , helpless and hapless , so close he can reach out and feel minsung's hurt in his veins and yet so far that he is unable to do anything but help as he so desires to . it is a not uncommon ache that lingers in his lungs , pollutes his veins , blackens his everything . as the first , the very beginning , the one who took his breath with the universe's conception , it is only second nature to stare from afar and yearn in aching , burning , desperately lonely desire . even now , boundless being bound in a paper thin body , even now - jiwon cannot hide the utter hurt in his soul . not with the way he frowns , deep and morose .
he wants to reach out and , almost , briefly , does he . " why ? " always the questioner , always wondering why , why , why ? why must he be stuck in a body that wishes to render itself apart with the expansion of the cosmos ? why must he be forsaken to be separated from his beloved kin , lightyears from where they all belong ? why must he bear witness pain , and hurt , so intimately close as he does now ? his frown turns a little sharper , less pained and more determined , star - bright surety in gaze . " i'm here . why must you do this alone ? "
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❛ you don’t have to tell me . ❜ from seulbi
@wcvensouls // nothing but vulnerable
silence presses into the recesses of mind , threatening to suffocate him if he breathes too deep . it's dark , and for a moment , daeho thinks that she has drifted to sleep . the itch in his fingers , the bone - deep need in his bones is urging him to kick the covers off and to flee - to seek something that sets his heart thundering a roar in his chest once more . but he freezes ; her fingers are scalding hot and icy cold where they begin to trail along collarbone in gentle intimacy , and it takes strength from deep within to not flinch violently away . ( it takes something else entirely to relax beneath her inquisitive touch )
silence , and then - her voice . seulbi is quiet when she speaks , an almost whisper that shatters the silence . ' you don't have to tell me '. and , for a moment , an instinctive snarl rests on tip of tongue - ' i don't owe you a fuckin' thing '. for a moment he tempts the idea of snatching her fragile wrist away , squeezing tight , tighter than she likes and begs for , until a pitiful whimper falls instead . for a moment he tempts the idea and reaches down to curl calloused fingers over her wrist . but then it dissipates when her fingers trail over heart instead , held loose now in ring of fingers . instead he breathes in deep , slow , anchoring , drowning and suffocating . instead he squeezes in gentle , quiet appreciation .
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❛ did you ever care about me ? ❜ / farrah and hojin :')
@oldspoet // nothing but vulnerable
oh his heart hurts , painful and tender and open - wound fresh . he knows these words like he knows laughter , and smiles , and too intimate touch for someone who does not seek it , who shies away from it because it is foreign and too much ( too much , he is simply too much ) . his heart hurts , and he cannot even look her in the eye , cheeks scarlet not from flushed pleasure or howling laughter but shame , shame , dirty guilty shame . he cares , burning bright , painfully so . he cares , and hojin knows that it hasn't always been as obvious as it should ( as she deserves ) . so he keeps his gaze cast aside , like a kicked puppy , as if he can hide the fact that her words stab into his chest , as if looking elsewhere but her gaze will give him the courage he needs .
" i - . " stuttered word , tongue too thick in mouth , choking whatever he intended to say . coward . he swallows thickly , tries to swallow his heart back into his chest from where it is crying out in pity and hurt and a desperate plea . " why do you think i don't ? " turn the conversation's spotlight away from him to her , question why it isn't obvious with the way he drapes himself over her shoulders , pulls farrah onto his lap , forces his way into her personal space because he cares , and cares , and loves so much it hurts .
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gently kissing everyone on the forehead who sent me memes <3
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𝑵𝑶𝑻𝑯𝑰𝑵𝑮 𝑩𝑼𝑻 𝑽𝑼𝑳𝑵𝑬𝑹𝑨𝑩𝑳𝑬 . ( soft angst starters. )
❛ i can’t do this without you . ❜
❛ it’s not safe for people to see us together . ❜
❛ please don’t leave me alone . ❜
❛ i don’t want to know . ❜
❛ just go . get out of here , go . ❜
❛ i can’t even trust myself , anymore . ❜
❛ there’s nothing left for me here . ❜
❛ i still need you . ❜
❛ i only wanted to help . ❜
❛ why are you doing this ? ❜
❛ tell me it’s not true . please . ❜
❛ i have to do this alone . ❜
❛ how did you get this scar ? ❜
❛ you don’t have to tell me . ❜
❛ don’t yell at me . ❜
❛ i never meant to hurt you . ❜
❛ things are getting bad again . ❜
❛ you should go . ❜
❛ you’ve said enough . ❜
❛ how dare you ? ❜
❛ why are you still here ? ❜
❛ you deserve better . ❜
❛ i don’t want to talk about it . ❜
❛ how can i fix this ? ❜
❛ why do you hate me ? ❜
❛ i just want to feel something . ❜
❛ don’t lie to me . ❜
❛ did you ever care about me ? ❜
❛ i don’t regret any of it . not a single thing . ❜
❛ how could you say that ? ❜
❛ i never asked for this . ❜
❛ this isn’t you . ❜
❛ i need to go . i can’t be here . ❜
❛ what’s that supposed to mean ? ❜
❛ i’m not sober enough to talk about this . ❜
❛ thank you for being gentle with me . ❜
❛ how can i possibly trust you ? after all you’ve done ? ❜
❛ don’t run away from this . ❜
❛ you don’t understand . ❜
❛ please , i can’t do this right now . ❜
❛ can you forgive me ? ❜
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life is Busy but i will be here.... Soon :')
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how to get rid of the feeling that there is something irreversibly and unforgiveably wrong with you?????????
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&. 𝐣𝐨𝐣𝐢 𝐥𝐲𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐬 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬.
( lyric sentence starters taken from various joji songs. )
❛ will your tongue still remember the taste of my lips? ❜
❛ will your lover caress you the way, that i did? ❜
❛ i just wanna make sure you’re okay. ❜
❛ i thought we’d last forever. ❜
❛ the demons told me everything. they whisper in the night. ❜
❛ you don’t know me, what the fuck you mean? ❜
❛ i’m a bitter fuck. ❜
❛ i don’t wanna live in my skin no more. ❜
❛ i won’t fuck with you if you don’t fuck with me. ❜
❛ so tell me, am i crazy? ❜
❛ i don’t wanna waste my time if i can’t be by your side. ❜
❛ you’re only on my mind when i need you. ❜
❛ i promise you my heart is made of gold. ❜
❛ would it kill you just to throw a little bit of attention? ❜
❛ would you hate me if i said goodbye? ❜
❛ i don’t smile for the camera, only smile for you. ❜
❛ don’t follow me, you’ll end up in my arms. ❜
❛ you should be with him, i can’t compete. ❜
❛ i’ll see you in the next life. ❜
❛ i promise i won’t lie, we’ll make it out alive. ❜
❛ so punish me, i’m hanging on your noose. ❜
❛ so pull me up so i can breathe with you. ❜
❛ i can’t get over you. ❜
❛ teach me to love just to let me go. ❜
❛ but right now i’m just not strong enough for you. ❜
❛ i don’t feel the way they programmed me to feel today. ❜
❛ you and i, we are one in the same. ❜
❛ i wish you were here with me now. ❜
❛ right now, laying here alone is heaven. ❜
❛ i just need you one more time to get it right, you know. ❜
❛ i fell for your magic, i tasted your skin. ❜
❛ i know you’re not in love like you used to be. ❜
❛ when night falls i am your escape. ❜
❛ when you lay alone, i ache. ❜
❛ if you’ve been waiting for falling in love, you don’t have to wait on me. ❜
❛ i’ve been aiming for heaven above, but an angel ain’t what i need. ❜
❛ not anyone, you’re the one. ❜
❛ what you want is what i want, sincerity. ❜
❛ hold me close cause you never know just how long our lives will be. ❜
❛ there’s something in your laugh that makes me fear the way you smile. ❜
❛ we can pretend we’re normal people. ❜
❛ we don’t gotta love each other right, we just gotta make it through the night. ❜
❛ by the way you move, i know you want me to. ❜
❛ if you ever go, all the songs that we like will sound like bittersweet lullabies. ❜
❛ those chills that i knew, they were nothing without you. ❜
❛ you’re the one i can’t lose. ❜
❛ no one loves me like you do. ❜
❛ since i met you, all the gloomy days just seem to shine a little more brightly. ❜
❛ have you ever loved? would you go again? ❜
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he feels childish all at once , a cascading wave that crashes through edges of mind relentlessly . for a moment , tips of ears burn scarlet in embarrassment , and minjun is already opening mouth to stutter out an apology for what must be an odd query , for bothering her after her wonderful performance . but her smile soothes quick and easy , even if embarrassment lingers at the edges of his tiny , oh so tiny smile . " perform in front of all these people . " he clarifies , as if he himself does not stand before a crowd of strangers in bustling , busy streets . " i do . well , i busk but - busking isn't the same as performing an open mic , i think . "
* ꕀ “ how do i . . . perform ? ” inquiry is unexpected , but absolutely preferred over guys rushing to the edge of the stage asking for her number so she offers a smile . “ honestly , it probably helps that i loved having all the attention on me as a kid . i think it gets easier the more you do it . do you play ? ”
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DINO + IMA -EVEN IF THE WORLD ENDS TOMORROW-
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wcvensouls
while noah is supposed to be working when he is at the club, he could never deny junseo anything. a teasing but fond smile appeared on his lips as he approached the other, wrapping arms around his frame. “ oh? does my baby want my attention? ”
as soon as arms wrap ‘round torso , junseo all but melts into noah , grin turning starry-eyed and dopey . it doesn’t take much to keep him occupied in a club of all places , alcohol and familiar faces enough of a distraction . but in this moment nothing could distract more than the other . “ i always want your attention . and your hands , and touch , and k - kisses . ”
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